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.com today. ARK. received their first luminary
mission from the speakers. Upon request from
the world of Danatu, our two heroes have set
off to investigate some disturbances to the wildlife
of the dream. It seems that some of the world's
notorious arachnid elements have been spotted
far from their usual hunting grounds, and so
observed and endangered fauna have been vanishing
from the preserve. The local wardens, however,
had a great deal of trouble getting to the bottom
of this caper, so the Council of Elronda has
sent out a request for luminary assistance. Now,
the situation I'm down to has certainly caused
for alarm, but this is Jules and Jean. We're
putting on the case. I'm sure I'll go smooth
as silk. That was a spider joke. You'll get it
later. Really? I love that you unironically used
the word caper in that. That's at least a five
-cent word, right? Let me get into it. Let me
get into this. We're going to banter. We're going
to banter real soon. But first things first,
let me dive into this shit. Welcome, everyone,
to Danitou. We've talked to a few of the worlds
in the Concord and of the extraplanar phenomena
that seem to be changing them, in many cases,
threatening them. Worlds like God's Breath with
the ever -growing rattle, or Arnikek with the
ever -strengthening ever -wins. But I think you
will agree that few worlds face a doomsday as
truly and abhorrently terrifying as Danatu. Because
Danatu has spiders. Gross. Oh yeah. Danatu is
actually quite similar to old God's Breath. The
main settlements of the world are dotted throughout
rich forests and open plains. The world is...
teeming with rich and varied wildlife, including
many fascinating and unique species of flora
and fauna. The speakers of the Radiant Sandale
have worked with local governments to establish
a large primary portion of the world as sort
of a nature reserve. This area is known as the
Dream. But, of course, where there are dreams,
there are also nightmares. And much like God's
Breath, the Shadowfell, the Plane of Nightmares,
seems to linger at the fringes of this peaceful
land. And it takes the form of spiders. Giant
spiders. Supernaturally powerful spiders. Some
rumors even speak of spider -humanoid hybrids,
the changed forms of those that have traveled
too far beyond the borders of the dream. Nobody
knows exactly how many there are, but they are
slowly destroying the balance of nature here,
moving deeper into the territory of the dream,
to hunt and to grow and spread. Some doomed speakers
will say that all of Danatu will someday be connected
by the silken strands of the Predator's world
wide web. And it is here, on Danatu, amidst this
crisis, that we open up on this little story.
And we do so naturally, on a shot of a pub. Nestled
in the shadows of some massive trees, connected
by a few slowly swaying rope bridges, is a little
brewpub. As we... Zoom down to the wooden structure.
We can see a sign resting above the door labeling
it as the drunken dingo. Hey, it's funny. It's
cool. It's a gathering place for visitors to
El Ronda. All right, we're in Australia. A mostly
elven settlement. Stop it. Deep within the borders
of the dream. There's giant spiders. Stop it.
I'm funny. Giant spiders and dingoes. I'm funny.
The locals. Keep to their canopy homes, whose
lights can dot the branches of the trees above
like stars in a night sky, whilst travelers generally
keep to an assortment of inns, shops, and taverns
on the forest floor. Currently, sun shines through
the leaves speckling the roof of the drunken
dingo. We pan inside through the, dare I say
it, saloon doors. Where we see a quaint little
place filled with the imagery of wild, strange
animals. No hunting trophies, of course. Just
images, paintings along the walls. And in one
corner of the room, sitting at a table beneath
a painting of some wild, magical beast called
a kangaroo. Shut up, Steven. We see Blanche Trudeau.
Blanche, you are currently holding a letter.
One that you received just yesterday at your
station in the Golden Bay of Nowari. Wow. You
see, the March of Vice and therefore the Golden
Bay Tournament are coming up swiftly, and so
you had made plans to speak with Jean Franklin,
your pupil, about a return to the world. Jean
had agreed, but then sent this missive before
the meeting date, explaining that he and Jules
had been requested on the world of Danatu to
deal with a potential spider situation. The letter
mentioned that, should you still desire to meet,
all the necessary documents would be filed to
grant you passage to Danatu. Jean and Jules have
a little more clout than post -Sunset Town they
had before, so they can do that now. If you do
decide to come, it says, they would meet you
at the Drunken Dingo at approximately 10 a .m.
this day. It is now 1 a .m., and they have not
showed. The proprietor here remembers seeing
them yesterday. They had mentioned between Jean's
complaints about the dingo and how dirty it was
that they were going to scout things out and
return that night, and they never came back.
It has become completely clear to you, Blanche,
that something has likely happened to the two.
So what is your plan? Well, Blanche is going
to, at the dingo, ask around and try to see if
anybody has seen or heard of Jaune and Jules
in the area. Try to get some clues as to where
they may be. You stand up. Looking around, you've
got a little information, but maybe there's more.
You can get a general direction, something, anything.
I'm looking for two luminaries. You yell this
out and you hear a sound, almost as if your voice
summoning it of, I love them, saloon doors. What
other kind of doors are there? I will never make
a sound for those. Thank you, please. Just because
you love it so much. Blanche, you turn around
to face that sound and see that a new figure
has just pushed through these doors. As your
eyes fall on this figure, they alight with recognition.
Someone Blanche knows quite well, but hasn't
seen in some years. Your fellow pupil under the
tutelage of the storm eye. Luminary Emin Roth,
who perhaps recognizes you and says, Are we ready
to rumble? Welcome back, Stomp! Yeehaw! Hey.
Was that too loud? Yeah. Damn it. Too loud's
great. Too loud's great tonight. This is a celebration.
We got really far back for it. I tried. I'm so
excited. Oh, I'm so excited. This is going to
be so stupid, everyone. I'm so stoked. We're
going to have so much fun tonight. That's what
we did. We're having fun. Oh, I'm so stoked.
Welcome back, Stomp. Thank you. Yeah, I'm glad
to be here. Thanks for inviting me. Absolutely.
Absolutely. Oh, North Country. Yes. Yeah, here
we are. It's been a while. It's been a while
since we've had you on the show. Yeah, it has
been a while. Yeah. I wore my thermals and just
in case. And Stephen's gigantic halo face light
above his head is keeping me warm too. Yeah.
We're trying to figure out the best spot to put
that so we can start to do video. We're going
to make it a little better. It's quite glaring
in the video. It was a silhouette against the
light when we tried. It was something else. Speaking
of Steven, to catch you up, Zebulon's dead. He
died. And Steven's now playing a turtle. Portal.
I think that's it. That's everything? Yeah, that's
it. That's exactly it. That's what happened in
the last 30 episodes. Interesting. Now, does
this turtle have a lisp? No, no, this tortle
has no speech impediments, just a little bit
of a nasally voice. We're going for a Marge Simpson,
right? Sexy Marge Simpson. Older, sexier Marge
Simpson. That's what I do imagine. Oh, you won't
have to for long. I didn't have a token for it.
Just you wait till we get into combat. It's great.
Well, that's sad, but did you have a grieving
period? Oh, we certainly did. Yeah, there was
music and everything. Yeah, there were tears
for sure between us on the show and honestly
people who listened. We had a lot of people reach
out and say, yeah, I actually shed tears over
Zebulon. Wow. Yeah, it was wild. Interesting.
I'm still waiting for my co -host to kick it.
Just kidding. Bink is a lively little fella.
Who knows if we'll ever nail him down long enough
to kill him. Yeah, he's too fast. He's very nimble.
We miss you, Bink. Oh, man. Man, this is awesome.
Before we get into anything, there's a giant
box just sitting here in the middle of the table.
Big box. Steven's murder knife is there. What's
going on with that murder knife box? It's my
murder knife. Oh, sorry. He's the murderer, so
I get confused. That's true. That's true. Mrs.
Stomp would be like, oh, my God. PTSD. Her daily
life. She sees these boxes too much. Yeah, we
got a box from friend of the show, Captain. Oh,
the Captain. The Captain, yeah. It's mail time,
baby. Mail time! Yes! Oh! Nice. I remembered
which button it was on because I looked just
before we started recording. We got a mail time
drop. We haven't heard that in a while. Give
me some more. One more. Yeah. Let me soak it
in. I love it. What is this? I want to look at
it, but my mouth has to face my mic. No. Oh,
my God. Oh, dear Lord. This is scary. What is
this thing? The captain built and sent us what
he is calling the port. Oh, look, it's beautiful.
It is the biggest dice tower I have ever seen.
What the fuck? Painted in the exact opposite
of the fantasy pants colors. Dude. Instead of
blue and gold, this thing is painted in red and
silver. Oh, you're doing Gabby on there. That's
so nice. That's beautiful. Respect the colors.
What's the skull and crossbones something Jolly
Jack thing? Jolly Roger? Jolly Roger. Jolly Roger.
There's a Jolly Roger on either side with horseshoes
and a natural one. Horseshoes. There's a 32.
What's a 32? What's a 32? Oh, we're going to
have to dig into this. There's a middle finger
in the back that says Evil Incorporated and Captain
Approved. There is a middle finger on the back.
Captain, you son of a bitch. Stephen just exploded
the bike. Captain Approved. Giant middle finger.
Evil Incorporated. There's a frown. Yeah, there's
a frown in the center of the skull and crossbones.
Yeah, and 32. With a couple of 32s. Interesting.
And all of our names painted on it. This is amazing.
Jeremy, Steve, and David. I feel like I can feel
the good juju getting sucked out of me as I hold
it. So I'm passing it off to David now. I feel
this beautiful, nasty boy. Captain. It's even
got fluff. That's beautiful. Thank you. You outdid
yourself. In the bottom of it. That is beautiful.
It's beautiful. Oh, wow. Wow. It's tacky. It
was just painted. He may be outside. He may be
nearby. I can't get over the middle finger. Dude,
am I going to kill these characters on a side
mission now that I have this new power? It's
terrifying. Awesome. Oh, man. It's like having
a fifth person in the room. I'm still stuck on
that 32, though. I'm curious about the 32. We're
going to dive into it. We'll dive in. I'll message
him and ask him what that's all about. Between
weeks. Anybody can figure it out. Let us know.
Whoever figs out in the Discord gets Steven's
ponytail, so just do it. It's a new giveaway
contest situation. Here, use the murder knife
to cut it off. I'd be delighted. Right now. Right
here, right now. Go. They need to earn it. Y
'all aren't strong enough. I mean, we got three
of us here, so I don't care. This is insane.
I need to put this in perspective right now.
Tonight we have Stomp here to help save the day.
We have a battle map from Sound Puke Hero, one
that I basically asked her to make, and she made
it within an hour. It's incredible. It's super
cool. New map. Oh, nice. Dude, new map. This
is all kind of on the fly, and I kind of threw
it at her way too late, and she delivered like
crazy because she always does. You'll be seeing
that a little later. I'm also going to be ruling.
Rolling my gold vein dice from Zoo Beard. Just
got them right here. I'm rolling them in a tower
from the captain. A brand new amazing tower.
The Port of Pain. Yeah. And also, this is true.
I have a baddie I'm running tonight designed
by Hooli Forge. What? Yeah. Yeah, thank you,
Andrew. We are all working on some other cool
stuff together now, too, as well. Is that allowed?
That's wild. Oh, yeah, it's allowed. Are we going
to allow this? Oh, yeah. It's going to happen,
whether we want it to or not. Dude, it's amazing.
This show is built on the community, and that
is unreal cool. Hey, pants people. Pants people.
Revolt. No, I'm not doing that anymore. I've
seen the stuff that Andrew, a .k .a. WhoTheForge,
puts in the Discord. Yeah. I don't know if...
Like, this is dangerous. We're going to die tonight.
We're going to have fun. This could be it. When
are you going to christen this thing? Tonight.
Tonight. I'm not doing it now. No, you're just
going to wait? I'll do it in combat. You're going
to... All right. I'm not rule for nothing. I'm
a serious dungeon master. I just want to hear
it. You can wait. You can hear it before you
die. It's the last thing you'll ever hear. Is
that what they call a hook? Is that a hook? You're
going to have to listen if you want to hear the
dice. Through the new dice tower. Yeah, that'll
be next week's sneak peek. So back to the pub.
You've been spending some time back in your home
world of Moor, back in the Silver Hills, where
you just ended a plot by the snake eater poaching
organization that threatened your local giant
goat population. The goats. You've got to save
the goats. Got to save the goat. Some crazy stuff
probably happened. I think we have it on record
that you fought a troll at some point. And you
actually now have a magical sword. It's in your
inventory. The details of that sword are fully
up to you. Is it cool? Very cool, very cool.
I love it. It's nice to be home, too. Yes. You're
also a little five now. With that mission having
been wrapped up, you have come to Danatu for
one very simple reason. You have gained intel
that a major player in the Snake Eaters is here.
In this region. This individual is particularly
talented in the arts of beast taming. And so
it may be that they are connected to the strange
movements of these rumored giant spiders who
are encroaching upon way deeper in the dream
in this nature preserve than they should be.
And you've heard that your old buddy Jules LaRoche
is here investigating the same thing. You heard
he has been frequenting this establishment, and
so you stopped by here to find him. Bink, your
sidekick is currently undergoing a heist. I mean,
a mission of his own. Fully legal. Nothing going
on there. Fully legal. You're on your own. Maybe
it's good to pick up some help. You step in here
looking for jewels. Instead, you are faced with
someone else. Someone from your more distant
past. Another disciple of the Big O. Fellow trainee
swordsman, Blanche Trudeau. Oh, boy. The crew's
together. I'm looking for two luminaries. And
you see each other. What? Is it you? I'm in wrath.
Now that's a face I haven't seen in many moons.
Yes, yes, well. It's wonderful to see you, my
friend. Blanche walks over and holds out a hand.
She wants to do one of those, like, cool, like,
forearm handshakes. You know, like, only people
who have trained in battle together can really
do cool. Oh, beautiful. Well, what brings you
here? I'm, uh, I'm searching for Jules LaRoche
and Jean Franklin. I heard they were here, but
the communication has fallen short. Oh, all right.
I have not seen them either. We shall look. But
how have your studies been at the Citadel? Wow.
Have you continued your studies? I have, certainly.
Since we last met at Master Ozanyoshikasu's dojo,
I've become the, well, I'm quite proud to say
the... Defender of the Golden Bay. The master
of defense. I protect the world. Not the world.
It's not the city either. It's really just the
bay, isn't it? It's what they call it. The turtles
have a very romantic way of naming things. There's
actually, I forgot what it was, but in the episode,
there's another term for it that's the more technical
term, but turtles don't use that. To them, it's
the Golden Bay, the nine pools. They just like
to use over -romanticized. They're kind of Shakespearean.
I don't know. Oh, I see. And in whatever flowery
language you'd like to say it, I am the defender,
the master of the fence of the Golden Bay. And
Jean Franklin, who I understand you have met
before, is my pupil, once as you and I were ozens.
Mm -hmm. Well, what a timely encounter. And of
yourself, what have you been up to? Oh, I can't
wait. Don't remind me. Don't remind me. I've
been chasing those earth eaters, those bottom
dwellers, those mud humpers, as long as I can
remember. The mud humpers? Yes, yes, the snake
eaters. And you know they gather around the pillar,
especially during the sunlight. They sound at
least dangerous. Yes, yes, yes. I've been honing
my bushcraft and my hunting skills. Because,
you know, at the Citadel, you know, they focus
so heavily upon mayhem and battle, but they don't
really hone in on hunting and things of that
nature. And Blanche puts a hand on M and Rath's
shoulder and pulls them. And they're here, these
earth humpers there. Have you tracked them here?
As a matter of fact, yes. They're spreading like
wildfire. And something like, kidnapping, do
you think it could be connected with the disappearance
of Jules and Jeanne? Absolutely. Yes, that's
my running theory at the moment. I'm very pleased
that you're here. I'm hoping that we can work
together and combine our efforts and hopefully
we can both get something out of this. Yes, yes.
Well, I will teach you what I know about hunting.
It's very important. It comes in time. Very well.
And with your skill in tracking and hunting and
my skill in battlefield management and control,
then I think that we can fuck these earth humpers.
Absolutely. I have learned some very unique skills.
Very unique. This is how you catch them. You
knee up on them. Oh, God. No. No. It's very,
very simple. Very unique. Straight to the point.
Do you recognize any faces here in the bar? Is
there any place in particular? Any person we
should start questioning? I must admit, I've
just arrived here. I have no information to go
off of. I don't know who to speak to. Perhaps
the proprietor or the barkeep? I have a suggestion,
if it's helpful. Yes. You can take this any direction
you want to, but you do, you get to burn a slot
for it, but you do have a spell in the wrath.
That actually goes very well with your new training
in hunting and survival. This is a spell called
Locate Plants or Animals. And with this spell,
if you specify basically a beast and you can
sort of describe it, you can sort of feel the
earth. You can feel sort of the presence of nature.
And the closest one of these would be alerted
to you. Now, if it's true that they're utilizing
these giant spiders that should be far on the
borders. and they are closer than they should
be, then perhaps the closest one is wherever
the hub of this activity is. That's right. It's
a possibility. Okay, okay. It's one way. Is there
any way that I could perhaps, if Emon Wrath decides
to use this spell, is there any way that I could
provide the help action using my new eyes of
minute seeing? Oh, that would make sense. I'll
give you this because the spell itself works
automatically. Okay. But the eyes, because you
have those and you brought that up and that's
really cool, I'll give you extra information
if you are sort of on the trail of something,
what you might see on the way. Kind of a passive
investigation bonus. Okay. I think that's cool.
Yeah, so that gives me advantage on investigation
checks. Okay. All right, let's do it. Cool. Actually,
that means you have a plus five to your passive
investigation always. I don't know if it's on
your sheet, but keep that in mind. It is not.
Okay, keep that in mind. You always have a plus
five passive investigation. That's... Are you
sure? That's awesome. Because right now it says
14 for passive investigation. Holy shit. Are
you telling me the Blanche has a 19 passive investigation?
I believe you do. That's... sick blanche is a
detective now so you're a full detective that's
right yeah um we should touch this before real
quick what did you buy a store during your time
you have the eyes now you have the broom of flying
we touched on that um after after the last arc
and you had some money i believe you spent some
correct i spent some i didn't spend much of it
i i so I mean, work has been crazy. Blah, blah,
blah. Excuses, excuses. I bought two greater
potions of healing at 100 gold apiece. And using
Eatsman Del Prado's spell book, I spent 150 gold
to add three spells to my spell book. Okay. Cool.
And that's it so far. I'm hoping to do more soon
because I still have a boatload of gold left.
All right. All right. So if that's the direction
you want to go, if you want to use that spell,
that may help you hone in on where you need to
go next. Yeah, let's do that. Okay. So what's
it look like? You close your eyes. You're trying
to feel nature. What does Amon Rath look like
when he's feeling out into the natural energies
that surround us all? The mind goes blank. Everything
goes dark. And I fall deep, deep, deep into the
earth until I start to feel the vibrations of
the deep inner earth. I love that. Yes. It's
like a spider feeling the vibrations on its web,
using their enemy's tactics against them, and
you feel... Everything is sound and vibration.
Oh, it's awesome. And when you're tapping into
the deep, deep layers of the earth, it reveals
many, many things. You reach out, and you feel
them. You feel a direction, northwest, and you
feel a location, a distance, approximately two
and a half... miles, one of these giant spires,
something that fits this description, lurks.
You can vaguely make it out crawling in some
wall, into some sort of cavern, in some dark,
dank place. I can see tracks. You know the way?
In the mud, yes. You know the way. We have it.
We have it. We have a location and a destination.
How? How could you possibly? Incredible. It's
so cool. So cool. Blanche unsheathes her sword
and then sheathes it again. Let's go. What a
display. Oh, my God. Oh, man. And do you go?
Let's go. Northwest, you said? You say Northwest?
Northwest? Two and a half miles. I think that's
one of Will Smith's daughter's names or something.
Northwest? It's so you travel. Outside of the
drunken dingo and into the wilds. And from here,
we're going to cut to somewhere else. Montana
2. Somewhere decidedly different. Darker. Can
you give us one roll, David? No. You can wait.
I want it so bad. You can wait. You're going
to not want it when it happens. Trust me. This
thing and me, we're going to do nasty things
together. I know that you have the gold vein
dice prepped and ready to go. And honestly, I'm
all here for it. You want me to use the captain's
full metal? I mean, come on. There's some poetry
there. I think at least the first die roll has
to be the captain's full metal die that he gifted
us on the... No, I agree. Port -O -Pain. I agree.
We'll use the full metal dice in the Port -O
-Pain. Use the thing that's full power to start
off. Steven, what have you done? I get it. I
know that I'm dooming us. But it's poetic. Yeah.
It's poetic and I need to hear the sound. If
there's one way I want to go out, it's by the
captain's dice. Through the captain's tower.
Through the captain's tower. The gallows. A .K
.A. the gallows. It looks like a gallows. For
real. That red looks like blood. Speaking of...
Blood and gallows. There's none of that here,
but it's grim and dark, and this place is also
grim and dark where we're going. I did it. Nailed
it. We are deep within a cave, opening up onto
a cavern maybe 20 by 25 feet wide. While no light
shines in from the outside world, for we are
deep beneath the earth, there is an ambient glow
giving form to the scene, emanating from a great
painting that spreads across one wall. We see
some kind of gigantic serpentine creature, formed
as if by multicolored lights of a rainbow. Storm
clouds linger beneath its bulk, whilst sun shines
overhead. Perhaps long ago this room was some
kind of altar. Now, however, it serves simply
as a prison. Thick webs run along the walls here,
and beneath the light of this painting a form
struggles within a cocoon of this web. We can
only hear the muffled, and vaguely see the turtle
shell bulk of a captured Jean Franklin. And we
hear footsteps approach. The turtle freezes in
place as their light step moves up just before
him. And then, just over this cocoon, Jules LaRoche
appears from invisibility. It was over 24 hours
ago, Jules, that the two of you were ambushed
by some kind of invisible, maybe teleporting
spiders? You're not sure. You were just scouting
this area when they appeared out of nowhere.
Your quick thinking and Jaune's selfless act
of distraction led to your own escape and his
capture. You could have left, could have found
help, but that would have risked losing Jaune
as the monsters dragged him away. Instead, you
have had to wait and watch, follow and hide,
slowly working your way after them and deep into
the bowels of their lair. Thankfully, this cave
seems quite empty now. Most of the spiders, as
well as whatever thing has been commanding them,
are gone. You do know that someone else is living
here. You've seen camp supplies, most notably
cooking supplies, littering this deeper cave.
There's one room close by where much of the space
has been turned into a makeshift kitchen. The
smell of spices so strong down this deep beneath
the earth. It's certainly a matter of some concern,
but not your priority, I imagine, when you have
finally found a chance to save your luminary
partner. What are you doing? All right, describe
how he's bound up again. He's just like a full
cocoon kind of against the ground. So you're
right up kind of standing over him. He's kind
of like hunched over. Yeah. Is it something that
I could easily just slice open? I think it takes
time, but you could slice it open. You got your
rapier. You always have it. I think at this point,
Jules is going to do just that. Okay. This figure
is sort of frozen. They begin to start cutting
through that. Yeah. What are you? Oh, Jules.
It's you. I'm sorry. Go. Some time passes and
we see eventually the form of Jaune kind of still
pulling strands off his skin. Gross. Disgusting.
Shut the fuck up. It's okay. It was gross. I'll
throw you in the coyote if you don't shut up.
No, no. All right. Fine, fine. Well, this has
been a disaster already, but good show. You found
me. Thank you. I knew you'd come. I did. Jaune,
I always got you. Okay, yes, Kosa, yes. You are
deep, deep, deep underground. You know this chamber.
You've went through this cave once. You know
somewhat the way back. You know it's not a huge
cave. It's a sort of twisting tunnel that can
lead you out. It's all kind of like moving up,
up, uphill. If you're careful, and if Jean shuts
up, you might be able to sneak out of here unnoticed.
Is there enough light where we can actually vision?
What's vision like? It's dark. Fuck. This room
has some ambient light. There's a couple spaces
throughout the cave that have some dim light,
but there are also patches of pure darkness on
the way. You have the light cantrip, I know,
but there's a risk. Yeah, and that was going
to be my next question. Did I notice anything
on the way down here that would hinder my ability
to use the light? Are there others stationed
at different points? I will say you noticed nothing
on the way down, but you also noticed nothing
when you were out scouting. The area seems so
secure. The things, they just kind of were on
top of you out of nowhere. You don't fully understand
how it happened still. For all you know, they
could be here invisible. For all you know, they
could teleport in from nowhere. You're not sure
what happened. Unless you want to roll me an
Arcana check. I shall. All right. I'll also allow
an Arcana check from Jean Franklin if you wish
to roll one, Steven. Yeah, it'll take me a hot
minute to pull up his sheet. Take a turn. And
that will be a 17 for Jules. That's pretty good,
Jules. 16 on the die, plus one. I think Jean
rolls Arcana Untrained at a plus zero, right?
It's his Intelligence. Oh, okay. Great. Then
plus two. Yep. Natural one. For Jean Franklin
de Montelio. Okay. Okay. So Jean's just, those
things that, they're obviously demons of some
sort. I don't know what they are. Perhaps if
we could just, and just, you gotta shush him,
because you know what these are. You know what
these are. They are very rare creatures. Almost
unheard of, but there have been reports of them
rarely coming in from the borders on Danatu.
They're called phase spiders. These powerful
giant spiders have some inherent energy that
allows them to travel between this realm and
the ethereal realm, the plane that kind of lingers
just over everything else, almost like they're
jumping to a different wavelength of reality.
They can see you, they can hunt you, and they
can appear anywhere. They could be anywhere.
You've had to be very, very, very careful going
through this place, making sure that none are
about to appear, watching each room you go through
for a long time until you know that it's clear.
These things are horrifying. Yeah, I mean, so
they could be trailing us this whole time. They're
jump scare monsters. Oh, God. Oh, yeah. I hate
this world. I designed it, and I hate it. Yeah,
I can't think of anything else to do other than
try and continue. You can work very carefully,
very slowly in the darkness. You somewhat know
the way. You've been following the walls. You've
been being very careful. Or you can turn on the
light and go a bit quicker. You thought it was
all fun and games, didn't you? All goofy, goofy
clown time. Just stop here. That's not true.
I'm scary. I'll hit you with emotional whiplash
so fast. Well, I've got a quick question. No
one cares. It's not your turn. Fine. That's why
I'm keeping quiet. Yeah. I can't do it anymore.
Stop. How do we feel about off -screen purchase
of wondrous items? That is totally allowable.
How much? If you can buy it, if you can afford
it, yeah. Well, that's the thing. I'm searching
on the computer trying to figure out what the
cost is for Goggles of Night. I'll give you Goggles
of Night for 450. Whoa. 450 gold pieces? That's
very valuable. Darkvision's pretty awesome. Yeah,
it is. Good thing my character's not on screen
yet. I'm going to take some time to think about
it. It's going to look really stupid when you
have goggles over your glasses. No, no, no, no,
no. The glasses of minute seeing would go over
the goggles. That's even dumber. Oh, no. I can't
say. Jules, what you doing? Fuck. And where are
we? I'm sorry. So where are we at the moment?
I'll tell you guys. Not together yet. Not together
yet. All right. So my thinking is there's a high
likelihood they're watching us already. It's
possible. Very possible. You've been super, super
careful. And actually, until you moved to this
room, you were invisible. You only now appeared
when you felt this room was purely safe. When
you've watched a few of them leave. How far are
we out at this point? You're still in the bottom
room until you decide what you want to do. And
we haven't heard anything outside of this room.
You have not. Let me help you out here. Go ahead
and open roll 20. Stephen. I will open roll 20.
Oh, look at that big, giant black square. Yeah.
Great. I'm so glad I opened roll 20. Go to the
bottom of the black square. It's a huge square.
It is. This is the Rochelle map? Rochelle outdid
herself again. Way to go, Rochelle, by making
a giant map. Dude, I'm so stoked. I'm so stoked
with this. It's huge. You're in the bowels. You're
deep down here. Okay. Yeah, I'm going to use
my light. Well, here's the thing. No, no, no.
I'm here for it. Here's the thing. There's a
very good chance they're watching us already.
And also, if I don't use the light, by the time
we get to a point where I can see anything, we're
already in range of some shit. Okay. Can I get
super sneaky? What does that mean? Does... Does
Emin Rath have dark vision? Emin Rath does have
dark vision. As a half elf. Yes. You're the guide
here, Emin Rath. You're the only one in this
whole party that can see in the dark. I need
to refresh on what I have here. So I have that.
Yes, mostly you have that. You have your sword
abilities. You have a couple spells. Before we
get into heavy combat, I'll stop and I'll go
through everything so you know more about your
main stuff. That's kind of the main thing. You
give your general skills you can roll, like survival,
investigation. But yeah, you can see in the dark,
which is not something that comes up often, but
when it does, it is critically important. It
doesn't come up often, you say, seeing in the
dark. Which is why I'm going to offer you 400
gold for the goggles. I accept. That's the sound
of a handshake. Predator shake. Predator shake.
There we go. Dude, it's so sweaty. Hands are
so sweaty. All right. You have the goggles. Excellent.
That's going to be good for me. Let me just go
ahead and delete 400 gold. That's going to hurt.
Ouch. While we're already on old Steven here,
we see. Jules and Jean, the light lights of the
cavern. Yeah, it's bright light for 20 feet radius
and then dim light for an additional 20 feet.
Hell yeah, so Jean's staying close to you, probably
getting right before you as you begin to move.
And I've told him exactly what these things are,
so hopefully he's fucking quiet now. He's silent,
kind of. He's not the stealthiest character,
but he's very carefully moving ahead of you as
you press into the darkness of the tunnels, your
light shining. Along the walls. And we cut from
there again. We cut to the entrance of this cave.
Imanrath, your senses were spot on. The cave
was well hidden. A construction of webs and leaves
is covering its wide mouth. But you knew what
to look for. And especially with those eyes of
minute seeing, Blanche, you spot instantly what's
going on here. You spot that this is some kind
of manufactured veil. made of spider webs, to
hide this from the outside. On your way here,
you saw very little sign of spider activity.
There's no webs in the trees. And even the drag
marks of prey brought into the cavern, they were
carefully concealed. But again, with your passive
investigation as it was, Blanche, and your natural
affinity for the hunt and the wrath, you see
the trail clear as day. I see the tracks. You
see the tracks. But the fact that it was hidden
so well. Serves as further proof that an intelligence
rules over these creatures, pushing them to hunt
and return. Perhaps your adversary lies within.
Blanche, from what you have gathered, this isn't
far from where Jules and Jean had gone to scout.
But you asked some folk along the way, and they
pointed this direction. If trouble has found
them, then this cave likely lies at trouble's
core. You stand before the entrance. Do you wish
to push in through the webs? It's very impressive
that you could follow such teeny tiny little
tracks being spider feet. They're big spiders.
Yes, but I mean, like, the end of their feet,
they can't be very big. It has to leave a pretty
small track. Fair. True. Okay. Speaks to your
expertise, Amon Rath. I'm quite impressed. It's
easier than you think. All you have to do is
have a big mouth like mine and suck in the spider
webs as you're walking. And now it's your turn
to go first for a change. For God's sakes. It's
true hiker energy. I often hike first and get
all the spider webs in my face, David. He does.
I'm terrified of spiders. I always make him go
first. I want to look at that booty. There you
go. There you go. Yeah, Blanche is going to draw
her sword. She's going to don her brand new goggles
of night. And with her blade, she's going to
slice this screen of spider webs so that she
and Emin Rath may enter the cave. Okay. Okay.
Very nice. Very nice. If you pan to the top of
the map, Stephen, you will see the two of you.
Ah. Now, before we proceed any further, before
anything else happens, I totally missed this.
I'm going to do it now. I'm giving you a button
for unique up on them. That's just too good.
So this is going to give you advantage on a roll
later on. So you're going to roll twice, take
the higher. I mean, I got to do it. Excellent.
Excellent. Nice. Yes, yes. It's called a pun.
We're going to see some real bad stuff soon.
So, yeah, I'll stick with these two for now,
Enrath and Blanche. We're going to be doing some
flip -flopping a lot, though, so get ready for
that, guys. You stare into the mouth of the cave,
and both of you can see quite a ways into the
darkness. Blanche, what's your dark vision currently?
With your goggles of night? I think these goggles
of night give Blanche 60 feet. That's pretty
awesome. Of dark vision. Okay, you're looking
in. And you see that immediately it opens to
a wider sort of open cavern that branches off
in two directions. I wish I could show you Stomp,
but I can't because you'll see everything. You
can sort of see if you look over on mine. I'll
try to describe it too so it's not. So you can
see if you move in, there's one sort of thinner
passage moving out to the east and one that goes
south, kind of a larger funneling direction.
I'm going to get rid of this tiny little dice
tower. Was this a gift from your wife? It was.
It was. How dare you? This stupid, tiny little
dice tower. Monster. We've outgrown this dice
tower, Gabby. Honey, your name's in the new one.
It's okay. You're still involved. You pick the
colors. Oh, my God. It is. It's on the back.
Yes, she picked silver and red. She looked at
the lava lamp. I didn't even see that. That's
wild. I'll roll over your checks from earlier.
Your investigation, your passive, and your sort
of survival, your hunting. You're looking in,
you can see that drag trail you were following
goes to the southern path, the wider path of
the two. You see and hear nothing. What race
is Emonrath again? Half -elf. What do your half
-elf eyes see, Emonrath? Come on. I see safety
to the east, the smaller tunnel. Let's explore.
Let's check it out. Okay. It's quieter, maybe
safer. So you move up to that tunnel, you look
down, you see it snakes to the south at a point.
It continues around the corner, Amaterath, shall
we? Let's investigate before following the main
path to the south. So with 60 feet of dark vision,
can Blanche see down the southern path? You have
to move around the corner to look all the way
down it. And I opened up the other path as far
as you can likely see. The main path. Shall we
continue to the east? The path less traveled?
Yes, exactly. All right. The path less traveled.
We'll continue to the east. Perhaps there's treasure
that way. Less resistance. Opening up a can of
worms. I mentioned to Jules that... I do love
worms. There was a number of utensils, cooking
utensils, camping equipment, adventuring gear
sort of stuff strewn about. But that's more on
the bottom floor. It's deeper down, which you
haven't seen yet. So up here, it's just purely
spider webs along the walls, some strands across
the floor that you're probably carefully stepping
over. You see it snakes around to a point where
you just barely can't see the end of it as it
looks like it's kind of turning around to the
west again. I'll continue further. Okay. It literally,
literally is a dead end. Little dead end. Ah.
Can I roll perception or something? Checking
for traps or doors or something? Sure, go ahead.
Eamonrath, you can roll perception as well. That
is going to be a plus two for you, so I'll give
you your die. What about, actually, what about
investigation? Would investigation work here?
Yes, yeah, actually, that's probably even better.
Yeah, when you look around for clues and make
deductions. So a plus three for you, Eamonrath.
I'm going to... Blanche would like to roll those
with her Eyes of Minute Seeing. She's going to
pull her new Eyes of Minute Seeing and put them
over the top of her Goggles of Night. Double
Vision. Jules is going to give you so much shit
when he sees those. Just a 9 on the first roll.
17 on the die. Plus 4. Dirty 21. 21. Here you
go. 21. Dirty 21. Dirty 21. All right. All right.
Math's hard. There you go. There you go. So that
is 12 for you. So, M .N. Rath, as you kind of
look around here, you're investigating the area.
Ooh, there's actually a tray. Nice. You look
around the area, and you see... You don't notice
anything. Seems like a dead end. Except there
are some... spider -like tracks in maybe a mud
spa right in the center of this space. Blanche,
with your investigation, you realize that while
you were on your way to this cave, there was
a slight bit of rain. And even now you can see
a few drips, maybe a crack that comes in from
somewhere on the surface that's tripping into
the center of this space. And you realize there
wasn't rain for quite a while before. It was
quite sunny, which means the tracks in the mud.
are likely very, very recent. Emonrath. She whispers
to Emonrath. Yeah. Didn't you say it was raining
outside? Yes. Very, very subtle, but it was damp
out, yes. Can you hear the dripping? Stand back.
Let me look up. Let me back up a little bit first.
All right. I'm going to swap your tokens. Him
and Wrath, you are standing just behind Blanche
in this tunnel. Blanche, you are stepping into
this small sort of cramped space, about 10 by
10 feet wide room. Yeah. Give me one second to
decide if I'm going to cast a spell. I wish I
had a pike. I don't think I'm going to cast anything
yet. Okay. I don't want to waste a spell slot
just in case. Your investigation was very good.
You look up with the expectation of danger. And
so when something massive, this massive blue
and white form of the spider appears just above
you, its fangs bearing down on you as if from
nowhere, I'm not going to. roll a surprise round
on you guys because you were ready. But I'm going
to cut away. I'm cutting to you, Jules. Sean,
you're making your move down your tunnel. I'll
let Jules sort of move, and I'll move Sean with
the idea that he'll be right in front of you.
Steven's going to have to move me. Steven, you've
got to move Jules. That's us. I can just stop
you two. If you want to just go, I'll describe,
and I'll just put you where you are. Yeah, that'll
work better. You step out, you see the tunnel
snakes around to the east from your room, where
it opens to a wider chamber that you've seen.
This is the sort of almost makeshift kitchen
you passed earlier. And then there's another
path heading off to the south. You know, this
will lead to a sort of steep ramp that moves
out of the cave. Yeah, I mean, we're just going
to keep going. Okay. You're working your way
out. Now, what does it look like as you're moving?
How are you? You have the light shining. How
are you? preparing yourselves for ambush yeah
i think i think jules is out in front and i don't
know how scared john is but i feel like jules
is probably like trying to pull him along he's
he's scared but he's also the tank okay his goal
is protect you so he's actually walking like
with me oh yeah no he he's trying to fight you
to be in front because he does not like you yeah
in that case like He knows he can swap places
with you in an instant, so he's trying to stay
right on your ass, basically. Yeah, in that case,
we're walking side by side. If he was scared,
I was going to be pulling him along while being
in front, but I also considered cowering behind
him and shining my light over his shoulder. Hey,
you know what? No, we'd be walking side by side.
You are partners through and through. Yeah. And
these things come from any direction. We're holding
hands, too. You're holding hands. Hey, maybe
he does because he wants to be able to swap fast.
He's like, ready to go. preparing himself in
case something happens. You are moving. You reach
that point between the kitchen cavern that opens
up beside you and your light, as it shines out,
you can see that there's just like a sort of
camp stove set up, a number of like little like
pots and pans, kind of an open sort of a grill
set up almost. Like I said, spices along sort
of stone shelf walls that you're kind of viewing.
But you peek in there real quick. Turn your gaze
towards the way forward. And just in that moment,
as you sort of look away, Jean being like the
closer of the two of you towards that way, this
thing appears from out of nowhere, giant spider
arms launching down you, fangs bearing in on
you. and you knew what this is coming. So I'm
also going to say, I'm going to wave the surprise
round for you as well. I'm going to let you have
that sort of, you guys are ready. You guys knew
what this was. You knew they were coming. I think
it'd be bullshit if I'm like, and you were surprised
by appearing out of nowhere. It was coming out
of nowhere. You were ready for that. So with
that, I want everyone to roll for initiative.
All right. David. Whoa. Theft. Whoa, you stole
my. Dice tower theft. Stole my dice tower. With
blessed die. You touched another man's wife's
dice tower? Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Okay. What'd
you get? It's a 12 for jewels. 12 for jewels.
Okay. Not the best, but it's not a two. It's
not bad. All right. Blanche plus floor initiative.
12. Nice. 12 for both. Okay. Let me find Jaune
real fast. He's down with me. Right. I need to
roll his initiative. I have his score on here
somewhere. I know that was a joke. Oh. That flopped.
That's just dex, right? Yes. So straight roll.
Yes, straight dex. Natural three for Jaune. Okay.
All right. Now, Eamon and Rath. Yes. I need yours.
It's going to be a plus two on the d20. Ooh,
18. Damn. Emon Wrath does not get surprised easy.
Nice. That actually works out really well. And
so the battle begins. We have, so we're starting
off upstairs as this spider appears in this small
sort of alcove above Blanche and Emon Wrath.
And Emon Wrath will be the first to make a move
in this fight. This thing is... Reaching over
your stalwart ally, your old friend and new companion
in this little adventure, Blanche Trudeau is
in danger. And you're the first one to act to
save her. What do you want to do? I think I'm
going to roll a Hunter's Mark. Ooh, okay. All
right. Yep. There's no time to waste. Hell yeah.
So bonus action. You look at this thing. Boom.
It is marked. It is your prey. Absolutely. So
with that, now basically when you do attack it,
you're going to do extra damage. Yeah, okay.
So, like, if you want to go for a full attack
now, too, because that'd only cost a bonus action,
and your action, which is your main part of your
turn, is still going to be able to, like, go
in with your sword. And you get two of those
now. Hell of a five. Absolutely. Right off the
bat, let's go. Hell yeah. So you're up to your
sword. Yeah, there's no time to waste. Hell yeah.
This thing is marked. You see this thing almost
recoil as it feels something it's probably never
felt before. The gaze of a predator. Maybe something
more apex than it. Oh, hell yeah. Ebonrath slides
up into the sort of tiny alcove. Your back pressed
against the stone wall, but there's enough space
to swing a sword, and that's all you need. That's
all we need. Let's do it. I need two d20 rolls
for your two attacks. Ten. That's going to be
a plus six for 16. Damn. Wow. 17. That's just
a hit. Oh, yeah. There we go. Hell, yeah. Hell,
yeah. Okay, okay. Don't check my AC. Both hit.
Oh, shit. Both of them. Go ahead and roll. Nice.
That and that. D8 and a D6, because that Hunter's
Mark's giving you that extra bonus. Okay. What
do we get there? Two. Two plus three, five, and?
And another two. Okay, first attack is going
to be seven damage. You're rolling both again.
So we get a one and a four. One and a four plus
three. That is another eight points. Am I right?
Damn, yeah. Hell yeah. Damn, that's some good
arithmetic. You carve fast into this thing. Just
slides like... Two legs, pieces of leg go sliding
off. Icker sprays out. It sort of screeches.
That's what spiders sound like. I don't care.
And just kind of turns its attention, whipping
its spidery face towards you. And now it's a
spider's turn. So... Normally I can attack from
hidden at advantage, but I think given your preparations,
given your roles, given the fact that you knew
it was coming, I'm going to waive that because
I think that's cool. And honestly, this thing
is terrifying. So here we go. If I do hit, this
thing's terrifying. It's attacking him in wrath?
It's attacking him in wrath, which means for
the first time ever, past people. I got to record
this. Get the recording on it. Do it, do it.
Oh my God. For the first time ever. We're dropping
a die right into the Port -O -Pain. Oh, yeah.
32. Be ready for pain, my Harvey's. I don't know.
Ready? Ready? You guys ready? Let's do this.
I'm so ready. Oh. It's a natural five. Oh, five
on the die. No. Oh, shit. Okay. That sounds like
dull bone breakage. It was. Nice. It's storing
its power. It's storing its power, but it's only
going to be a nine, which will miss Emon Wrath.
This thing dives towards you, tries to bite down,
and you weave out of the way carefully. It kind
of almost cracks into the stone walls. It tries
to force its fangs deep into you. Blanche, it's
you. This thing moved away. It's focusing on
Emon Wrath. It gives you a chance to move. Blanche
is not going to move, but as a bonus action,
Blanche is going to cast Shadow Blade at second
level. Okay. Okay. Well, Emonrath, I see you've
learned a lot since our time at Ozen's Dojo.
Let me show you what I've learned, and I'll show
you more next round. This is so cool. Social
cast Shadow Blade and make an attack. Okay. Okay.
You don't get those two attacks Emonrath has,
but. Perhaps with this one, you can do some serious
damage. Yeah, give me one second to read exactly
how Shadowblade... Okay, so... You attack with
advantage and do extra damage. Yes. So I just
go back to my actions and just roll my longsword
attack, right? Yes, and you add the bonus damage
to it. I don't know why I rolled on D &D Beyond.
First attack was a... Or the first roll was a
15. Let's see if I can roll higher. That was
not higher. Does a 15 hit? 15 does hit. Okay,
sweet. So now I'm going to jump back to spells,
and that's where I'll find the damage roll here.
It's 2d8. 11 damage. Okay. Now, does that add
to your damage from your longsword normally,
or is it just the new damage for your shadow
blade? It deals 2d8 psychic damage on a hit.
Oh, I'm wrong. It counts as a simple melee weapon
because you're proficient. It's making a new
sword. It's not adding to your sword. I am stupid.
Right. So it is 2d8. Yeah, so instead of 1d8
plus 5, that's not even better, is it? It gives
you advantage in the dark, though. The only thing
is it would actually have been a 14 to do a plus
1, but it still hits. You're fine. Okay. You
cleave, you like, rather than draw your blade,
you see that you're up between the darkness and
a blade of shadow, flickering shadow forms in
your hand, almost blending into the dark itself,
sort of growing into the space of shadow, and
it just sort of cleaves its way into the spider,
more of its legs come cleaving off its body,
ichor splashing against the stone wall, and it
looks really, really bad. So 1d8 plus 5 is actually
worse damage than, or better damage than 2d8
on average. but I get the advantage on the attack
roll. That's huge. So I hit more, but for an
average, a little less damage. We're going to
zoom downstairs to Jules LaRoche. This thing
just appeared beside you, striking out towards
Jaune, but you were ready for it. Your eyes were
lingering in that space. You knew it was going
to come right when you turned your head. And
so the second it appears, you're already moving
to attack. What do you do? You stand up first?
You're first. Okay. Jules is going to cast Bardic
Inspiration onto Jean Franklin. Hell yeah. And
then Jules. Blue light fills the space for a
second. Then Jules is going to bless us both.
Good move. Good move. So that's what? So Jean
Franklin now has a D6 and a D4. Amazing. Yeah.
Super great. Cool. That's your move? That's it.
Okay. Spider's going on Jean. That's a miss.
Nice. Yep, it deals a strike. Jaune sort of spins
a shell right at him. The fangs come cracking
against his shell, not able to pierce through.
And he's sort of whirling against them in a spin.
This thing's taken by surprise. Jaune is up.
Coming out of that spin into an attack, I'm guessing.
Yeah, Jaune's going to do a spear attack. Hell
yeah. Plus five to hit. Let's see what we get.
14 on the die for a 19. That will hit. Nice.
All right, let's see here. This is 1d6 plus 2
piercing damage. 5 on the die for 7 damage. Okay.
Okay. Jaune whirls around, his spear cutting
this thing. Good dash right across. It's like
eyes. A few of its eight eyes or whatever get
scratched open. Icarus splashes down its face.
It screeches out. Jaune's staying brave before
it. The spider's sort of moving up its legs,
sort of kind of... crawling in the air, building
up for its next attack. We pop upstairs to see
the one upstairs is looking real bad, sort of
up against the wall. Icarus splashing against
the stone as you two move in to finish the job.
But here, here, let's cut outside for a moment.
What? Let's cut outside the cave. David, what's
happening outside? I'll tell you what's happening
outside. We see a great arachnid form moves towards
the cave mouth. dark armor covering its carapace
and legs. A saddle rests upon its back, and its
rider shrewdly examines the cave mouth, frowning
deeply when he sees the gash, the cut in the
web. We zoom out, getting a full shot of this
figure. So, okay. Everyone in paparazzi was really
dumb, but I couldn't not. Like, that was really...
So, sometimes you just... You have to do something,
you know. It gets in your head and you just want
to do it and you know it's a bad idea and you
do it. I mean, you don't have to. I have to.
You don't have to. You see a very threatening
figure. A rotund dwarven man with sun -tanned
skin and frosted white spiked hair. The typical
dwarven beard has been shaved down to a patch
around his mouth. His eyes are covered by shaded
spectacles and a little explorer's hat rests
on the crown of his head. If him in wrath were
to see this man, he would know immediately who
he is. A pillar of the snake eaters. A gloominary
of the citadel. Talented in beast taming and
ever hungry for rare and illegal meats. The exotic
poacher. The devilish diner. Guy Safari. Fuck.
Who looks to his... Shut up. Who looks to his
lair, now potentially revealed and invaded, and
says, whoever you are, I'm about to put the whole
Hamalama in your ding dong. What? We'll call
it there. We'll call it there.