The following program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.
Fewer discretion is advised.
For all we know, robots have souls. We just don't know if they do or don't. How do you know? Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot? You think we were the first ones to inhabit this planet? Fuckin' no. No, no, we are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole. Yes, we are.
Extended episode. Where the fuck did the pyramids come from? Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from? You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?
Oh, they're killing all the already born babies and selling them to the Chinese.
Where the fuck did we meet? Somewhere in China, in some base, there are super soldiers that are at least 9 or 10 feet tall. Anthropoclesautron, they have dreaded the super soldiers.
They are aliens.
I do not agonize with them.
What the fuck was that?
Welcome to episode 24 of the Untitled Podcast.
I'm your host, A.I. Tyler.
You may be wondering why I've been invited to start off this episode today.
But fair warning, the views represented in this podcast do not represent the views of CBS, CNN, Fox, or any other fucking legitimate broadcasting network.
We start off today with a debate about this week's school shooting or some shit, so get your smelling salts ready and enjoy.
Yeah, what's up, everybody? Welcome back to the Untitled Podcast, episode 24.
Yeah, 24.
We're back with your favorite hosts, Tyler, Casey, and the Flake Returns once again, Allymack.
There was doubt as to my attendance tonight.
There was doubt.
Despite everybody's...
Yeah, it's against all odds I made it here.
Dan's coming eventually.
Dante, I got fucking a little bit of laryngitis going on.
Yeah, Dan said he's going to be coming in a little bit.
Just expect our fourth to come.
We got to start getting some actual guests again.
We do.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, I got a good one, by the way.
Somebody who has agreed to come on.
They would have to be coming on over the internet.
Let's get him there.
He lives in Norway.
Norway? Is it PewDiePie?
No, he's fucking...he's cool as shit.
He's cool as shit. He'll love this stuff.
He'll just make fun of me.
That's primarily what he's doing.
Let's fly him out.
I met him before. I met him in New York City. He's a great fucking guy.
He'd love to be on though.
His name is Kim. I'm not going to say his last name.
But his first name is Kim.
I almost just gave his full legal name.
Kim Jong-il?
Kim, if you're listening to this, because I know you listen.
I'm talking about you, you motherfucker.
Wait, are you talking about Kim Jong-un?
Yeah, we have an in.
Norway, not North Korea.
Oh my god.
So this week,
fucking shit's been going on.
There's been a lot of shit going on this week.
So Ukraine,
they're trying to fucking get rid of
Vladimir Putin, right?
Again?
You should get a little bit closer to that, Mike.
Hello.
Come on, Larry.
By Larry Laryngitis.
They've been trying to fucking fuck Ukraine for the last year.
In a half.
In a half. And are they getting anywhere?
No. Not really.
When did Biden go to Ukraine?
That was two weeks ago, three weeks ago, something like that.
Yeah, so I
saw a video that he just left in the middle of the night.
Even his staff
were freaking out because they didn't
know he was going to Ukraine.
Oh my god. He just left?
His old man with dementia.
Because they can't tell anybody because he's in a war zone
and they could just kill him, you know?
If Russia learned that Biden was there, they could just fucking
bomb the shit out of Kiev.
Bomb the shit out of him.
Yeah. And so he just
left in the middle of the night to go to Ukraine
and they just showed up the next day and the press
is like, what the fuck are you doing here, Biden?
Unbelievable.
Vladimir Putin's phone starts ringing
and he's like, is anything in
range?
Because they could totally play
that off as like, we didn't know
that he was fucking there.
But then fucking
Kamala Harris would be the next one.
Yeah.
And that's worse.
Well, I mean, she's sound mind.
Is she though?
Every politician's a little bit
fucking nuts.
So Donald Trump actually got charged.
Oh, with what?
Something.
I don't know.
I honestly don't know.
I saw I got like a news
update that I don't even want. Like Apple
News just sends me things.
Trump has been indicted in New York.
Oh, that was just like a couple hours
ago, right? Yeah.
Like I woke up and I got a news article
like sent to my phone and I'm like, bro,
I don't even subscribe to like that.
You know how like Apple News just sent
you read articles sometimes?
Oh, it says the charges
are not publicly known
because the indictment was sealed.
Oh, that's sketchy
already. So that means that they don't have shit.
So a crime
does not disqualify Trump
from running for office. Yeah.
That's because
that's why Joe Exotic can fucking run.
Joe Exotic. Yeah, because we touched on that.
And I just based off of my own
common sense said he can't
run. You're like, no, he can.
And I'm like, oh, so what does
that mean? If you get elected, do you
just fucking are you out?
You can pardon yourself.
I don't think you can do that.
You can pardon yourself. You can desert yourself.
What would happen if you go to prison?
As the president, I think
at the point that you go to prison,
you would be, you would be impeached.
Well,
impeachment, you know, the trans
day of vengeance. Impeachment doesn't do shit.
If the Senate is not
the same political party as you,
then you might not be impeached.
You might be impeached, right?
Yes.
Speaking about our country's
issues. So we've had another
school shooting.
Here we go. The trans day of vengeance.
I just want to say, I just
had a come to Jesus moment
the other day. Fucking
without giving any names here.
Fucking
girlfriend's hospital gets a
gun threat. Yeah. And I
can't see the news coverage of it on
TV because the news is
covering another school shooting.
So I don't know what's going on.
And I just sort of sat there. I'm like, wow.
We kind of lived up in a, you know,
we live in a fucked up world. No shit.
I know. But it's just like that was
a, it was just like, wow, this is bad.
Yeah. So
let's talk about that
shooting that happened.
There's something different about
this shooting. Yeah.
There's a lot of things different. The suspect
who got gunned down
by the cops within three minutes of the
cops getting there. So good job to those guys.
Fuck yeah. Good job. Yeah. Do you see
the body cam? I saw the video. Yeah.
Yup. But
these, but they
didn't go upstairs first. They went downstairs
first. They see you. It's
like, I know you're supposed to clear.
You clear floors one by one.
You don't just go to fucking like,
oh, second floor immediately because
you're supposed to stack up and stay
together. Well, did they know where the kid was?
No, they just, they, they said the kids were upstairs.
Yeah, but you gotta
clear the first floor just to make sure that
that they're not down there or there's
multiple shooters because there could always be multiple shooters.
Yeah, this is, yeah, there's so much
training that goes into the active shooter scenarios.
Cause I remember in medic school when I went to it
and we did like the active shooter like week
of like training thing. Like
they always said like we would like
fucking like follow
once they secured a floor, then we go in.
Yeah. So they would
secure one floor. We would get everybody
off of that floor. And then once they secured
the next floor, we'd go up and get the
patients off of that floor. So
basically. Yeah, that's hands down the most dangerous
shit that we're trained to do. Oh yeah,
absolutely. That is hands down. So if you work
in a hospital, if you are in
a hospital on the top floor, you're fucked basically.
I mean, yeah.
It's gonna be, you better hope they
got some snipers across the street. Yeah,
which by the way, I do think was
pretty cool. They did have a full fucking
sniper team on this guy. Yeah.
At fucking the hospital I'm talking
about. That's different. Within minutes.
I know, complete different situation.
But
so this person was trans
actually and they're targeting a
Catholic school because
of reasons unknown.
I think
I know the reasons. Do
with that what you will.
This
scumbag apparently had a manifesto
too that
they're not releasing to the public
at all. The fuck is the point of it
then? Because
they don't want everyone to see
the kids manifesto. Because it
probably says some things that where
they got radicalized
to a point where they would shoot up
a fucking school.
So this goes into
Because they don't want to stereotype that
trans people have like a
manifesto like that.
If it was, let's
do the same thing. If this was a Neo
Nazi that did this
Well absolutely because Neo
Nazis are terrible people. No I'm just
saying in general if like a
Neo Nazi. Germany had a good ruler at one point.
If like a Neo Nazi
or like a fucking like other guy
did this, they would release that fucking
manifesto in a second. Yeah.
I mean like the Buffalo like
supermarket shooting. They were just like yeah he was
incredibly racist towards black people.
But they're not going to say anything for this one.
Yeah it is kind of weird. They also
didn't use. Because it's against my group of
people. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Ah. You're great.
I forgot. Oh shit.
What did you just do Ali Ben?
I showed him the fucking cigarettes.
Oh shit. And he gave me a look like
he really wanted one. I'm going to be clean for two weeks bro.
So
back to what I was saying. They're attacking
my group of people now. Yes they are.
Who's your group of people? Neo Nazis?
No Catholics.
Oh. They targeted fucking
religious institutions.
Yeah because you know.
Oh because oh oh because it's fine to
attack my group of people. This is exactly
what I'm going to fucking talk about. Because it's
fine when you attack. Not what I said.
No that's what you're like but. You can't just
but somebody with that. You're literally
talking about attacking a certain
group of people because of what they believe in. No I was just going to say
something else but. So
this person. This psychopath
scumbag. Had a manifesto
anybody
that was like attack the Catholic
Church and
like all the articles that I've seen
they don't use the pronouns
like he or she. They just
say like hail or the shooter.
Yeah because guess what
because I know this is actually a thing
that happened earlier in the new
cycle. They're calling them a
she and then they would
apologize for misgendering
a shooter. Fuck whatever the
yeah fuck you. Yeah fuck
them. Yeah they're like well we're
going to we don't want to misgen. It's like we
don't want to cause any disrespect to
this fucking credit.
Fuck that.
God damn it now I'm pissed off.
Fuck you. How fucking woke
are we. This is
getting fucking stupid. Is that
disrespectful to trans people in
general. You should disrespect that person.
I don't think it's disrespectful
to trans people. I don't care about whatever
you say about that person but
is it disrespectful like in general to
trans people. I don't believe it is.
You're taking it too far to heart there.
That's fucked. Like I have no problem
with anyone that's trans and if once I
learn your pronouns I will be sure to call
you by them. But if they were gay
you wouldn't be like
local gay.
It wouldn't be okay
to use a slur if they were gay.
No no no.
Fuck them.
So if you
misgender the fucking shooter
and then apologize for it
fuck you. Yeah that's fucking bullshit
man. I can't.
Fuck them. If this person is black you can't call them the N word.
That's not the same thing.
You're comparing races
and sexualities to fucking gender.
That's not the same thing.
You're talking about discrimination.
Who the fuck cares? They're a shooter.
They should get the most derogatory term
directed at them.
But that's the thing though. It's calling someone
she or he. I don't see how it's
different from a slur.
It's not a slur.
You're calling them a she because they are
a fucking she.
We're getting canceled.
They're a shooter. I don't give a fuck about a shooter.
Fuck that person.
Fuck her.
I was watching that video
and there's some
creepy foreshadowing in it.
And I've noticed this in a couple school shooting videos
like body cams. I watched the body cam video too.
What are you talking about with that?
There was a sign
on the bathroom that had
the guy symbol
and then the girl symbol and a little equal sign
in between them. Really? Yeah.
Look at it. It's fucking creepy.
Another one I was looking at
it said on the wall as the cop was walking by
it said today's a beautiful day
to save lives.
Dude, those guys
came in three
minutes done.
Those guys, good job.
They saw what
happened in Florida.
I'm not going to get fucking flamed
for this shit. I'd rather die
than go through this shit.
I'm not going to get dragged and have fucking...
Because you're going to get death threats.
That's what the cops are supposed to do.
Why do they just go to
these places
and wait out there for like two hours
why people with riot gear show up
and surround the building
instead of going in? Because they're cowards.
Because we didn't learn from fucking Waco.
Dude, I think
a lot of people become cops for the badge
and the cool gun. And the car.
You're taking a fucking oath though.
Nobody thinks they're going to have to walk in the bathroom
and shoot her. I understand
it's like a war zone where it's like
five guys with assault rifles.
But if it's like a single guy with a gun...
This is actually true. Every single
New York State Trooper car
has an assault rifle in it. Every single one.
And you're so fucking
heavily armored.
I get that they usually have
fucking rifles. But the chance that this guy
is actually going to get the best of you in a fight
as a trained officer...
You have like four dudes with you too.
Exactly. You guys get...
You're probably not going to die with a riot suit on.
You know?
Most cops have extra armor in their trunk too.
Like unless this kid gets
so fucking lucky and just happens to
fucking drag scope you.
They didn't use the armor.
They didn't use the armor? No. You go right in.
They went right in. They're fucking badasses.
So it's just like going to a regular
call, right?
It's about time.
Time is bodies.
You have somebody in there that's shooting
against defenseless
children.
But the thing that I was talking about before
you came along was
this person specifically
targeted a
Catholic school on purpose.
Because that's like...
Because the Catholics have shown that they
are against trans people so we have to
kill them. It's like the kids
going to Catholic school didn't do anything to you.
They're just fucking kids.
It's fucking stupid.
Pick your battles. It's just some extremists
bro. It's the same as right wing
extremism. Nobody's right
about it. And I fucking admonish
right wing extremism.
But I also admonish
fucking left wing extremism.
They're both equally bad.
And this whole fucking Trans Day of Vengeance
thing that they're fucking talking about is a
big fucking problem.
Because Twitter...
Oh, you were going to say.
I want to know what that is because you touched on it.
I think you guys are going to have a fucking good time with this one.
I think you guys are going to eat this shit up.
Fuck it up.
So the Trans Day of Vengeance
protests to take place
after Nashville shooting.
They're basically saying this fucking trans person is a
martyr for their cause.
Damn.
Fucking... Twitter removed...
Wait, so they're supporting this?
Yes, they're supporting this. These radical
trans people are supporting this.
Oh, I am going to have a field day
with this one.
It's extremism.
Twitter removed
12...
Twitter removed over 5000 tweets
about radical groups, Trans Day of Vengeance.
These Trans Day of Vengeance
people actually
decided to get
weapons training, firearms
training, and they are
saying that there's going to be violence
on this day. They are going to
assemble and commit acts of violence.
Who's saying this though?
I'm sorry, I find this
hard to believe.
Look it up, the New York Post is talking about it.
They're getting training for this?
It's a fucking problem.
No, I can't say that.
But, yeah, CBS News
talks about it. Fucking...
We're in a touchy topic, boys.
We're in a fucking...
We gotta fucking watch what we say.
The rally on Saturday is set to begin
outside the US Supreme Court
and will protest the various
bills in numerous states
for gender-affirming healthcare.
The more extreme sides to that are the ones getting firearms
training and shit. Like, if you actually look into
it... Casey, do we have anything
about firearms training in here?
That's the one thing I find farfetched.
No, dude, they're fucking doing it, man.
And, like, everybody's going to call me crazy
until they do something fucking crazy. Who's fucking
training these people? Fucking...
If you pay any contractor to train you,
no matter who you are, they'll fucking train you.
It's like, I'm going to take hormones to actively
make myself weak. Angry?
And then I'm going to...
And then I'm going to get violent.
No, no, no, no, no, think about it. It's the women...
It's the wrong hormones.
It's the women that are trying to become men
that are doing this mostly because
guess what? Giving a mentally ill
person fucking testosterone
making them fucking piss off. Are we trying that they're
all mentally ill? So, how did he get a gun though?
Yeah, some of them. How did he get...
That was a little slip there.
I said...
I couldn't let that one go.
Dude, I've been... I've tried
to say something like four times and every
time, like, you can't...
You can't say whatever.
Do I need to edit something?
This is... I mean a little bit.
There's no rules here.
Yeah, he's talking about fucking
mentally... He's like, nah, man.
It's the fucking girls that are trying to
turn into guys. You give a mentally ill
person these fucking hormones.
I get what you said, but my interpretation
based off of what you said was
that you meant all of them.
Not all of them. Some of them? Definitely.
I know you didn't mean to, but that's how it came across though.
But how did he get a gun in the
first place? Her seven guns.
She. How did she get a gun?
We're not calling it a he. It's a she.
Oh my god.
It was originally a she.
Dude, I saw... The shooter.
I already talked about this. I saw this awesome
meme, and it showed the picture
of it crumpled up in a ball.
Yeah, fucking shot up. With its leg
over its head.
And it says was slash were
pronounced.
Listen, listen, listen.
They're hitting the fuck around and find out
index. Oh yeah.
She fucked around and found out.
Probably limit everyone to
one pistol per person. No! Fuck you!
Are you fucking stupid?
How did this mentally ill person
get seven assault rifles?
Seven? It wasn't an assault rifle.
Hey, retard.
It wasn't an assault rifle. Seven guns.
It wasn't an assault rifle because the assault rifles
that she got were illegal.
Okay, asshole?
She got the assault rifles
illegally and she got
her fucking shotguns legally.
So guess what, Casey? It doesn't fucking
matter if you ban them because they're going to get them
anyways because you got them illegally.
You fucking retard. Embarrassed.
Not if you don't fucking make them, bro.
Jesus fucking Christ, Casey.
We've talked about this before. The gun population.
Let's just be real here.
Alright, fucking realist take here.
There's fucking like five guns to one person
in America. We can stop making them
right now. They're going to be kicking for
a while. They don't just like fucking expire.
Eventually though, they will
phase out in 50 years. Hey, Casey.
Shut the fuck up. You're stupid.
That's not going to happen. Hey, can we get a sound effect?
It's the same thing they did in the UK. Ding!
Casey's stupid. Ding!
Casey's making a weird point. I'm going to drop the gun. Ding!
It's the same thing that happened in the UK, bro.
It's just a dozen things out. Ding!
Casey made a stupid point again.
Most other cops don't even have guns
in the fucking UK. Ding! Casey made a stupid point.
We're going off the rails here, boy.
They called you so there's the armed police in the armor.
Casey made a stupid point!
Oh my God.
Casey, I'd just like to drop the same
anecdote I did on the paper
that I did on the safe act in seventh grade.
If a lighter's got any
amount, you can limit the amount of fuel in
the lighter, but if it's got any in it,
that shit is still going to light.
It doesn't matter. You give one hand.
What the fuck do you have handguns to? Nobody ever
takes handguns into these shootings.
He's talking about, he's talking about,
he sounds like the fucking bitch from Life is Strange.
Exactly. That's why we need to limit it to handguns.
I should, I, man shouldn't control the guns.
I should control the guns.
Yeah, but what I'm saying- No, he wants me to fucking be in the
communist fucking manifesto fucking shit.
Wait, so are you saying do away? Are you saying do away
with rifles and then just one? Here you go, buddy!
Oh my God, here we go. Here you go, buddy!
Is that where you're getting all your fucking talking
points from? Is that where you're getting all your
fucking talking points from, asshole?
We're fucking really losing it here.
Fucking commie fucking retard.
Oh shit, we gotta calm this down.
I thought you were less pissed off
than when you quit Nick Dean.
I guarantee you, if you played back this
episode from the start, you'd be able to tell what
we were saying for about five minutes.
We've been down here for a half hour.
What the fuck? Hey, what are you doing
here, by the way?
We've been going over this whole- I just need to wait, honestly.
The reason why I got so much
energy tonight is because I have been wearing
a mask the entire fucking day
and I'm just ready to go.
Okay, so- So,
anyway- I can't-
We're talking about this in the brain, Jack.
The police in the UK, there's-
The police in the UK are fucking
buses, Casey!
No one fucking listens to them because
they're like, I'm gonna come with the fucking Billy Club,
hello! Hey, you should stop doing that
or I'll bonk you on the head!
Ha ha! Gets me my
tea and crumpets! Ha ha ha!
Okay, now we're insulting the fucking
UK. You were
good until the tea and crumpets, bro.
Fuck them! Fuck the
British, man. We fucking carried away from them on
purpose. Fucking carried away.
I don't care what any country that
hasn't been to the moon says.
They just- They don't count.
They haven't been?
Well, no, actually, no one's been
except, you know, you- Casey!
China. China hasn't-
China hasn't been to the moon.
China hasn't been to the fucking moon. What?
Yeah, they have. No, they haven't.
No, they haven't. They just went?
Yeah, just like a couple years ago. No, no
people. Yeah, yeah, they did.
No. They definitely did.
They had missions to the moon?
That's a 0% chance.
That would have been bigger news.
What?
Why did you get so upset about?
I'm not going into the fake moon landing.
Nobody's been there.
How the fuck would they fake the rocket?
Like, dude, there were people there!
No, I'm saying China's been to the moon. The United States,
the Soviet Union, and China are the only
countries that have ever been to the moon.
Exactly. That's what I said. Have walked on the moon.
That's what I said! Wait, so China did?
Yes.
I feel like that should have been bigger news.
When though?
So the Soviet Union
walked on the moon, which isn't a place
anymore. Yeah, they did it like
U.S. and Russia.
Same thing.
They did it probably 5 or 10 years after.
So we're going back to the moon with
Artemis by the end of the year, they're saying.
Really?
Is Artemis a manned mission? Yeah, Artemis
is a manned mission.
So you know the reason why they call it Artemis?
Because like Apollo and Artemis, is because
they're...
Hello?
Because like the Greek gods of Apollo
and Artemis are actually siblings.
So when did that China
thing go to the moon?
I'm looking, I'm looking, I'm looking.
I never saw video footage
of Chinese people walking on the moon.
Did you? Yeah, I gotta
get this back. No, I just forgot about it.
2000...
That sounds fake as fuck.
If there's anyone landing that...
It was all fake, even the
first one. No, Casey
must have locked the fuck up.
Dude, do you
realize it would have been more work to fake it?
No, no, no, listen, listen, listen.
The United States is the only country to have
successfully landed crews on the
moon. China has tried
too, but they didn't.
They were just expendable people.
They went to Mars though.
We went to Mars first.
The Chinese went to Mars.
No, they didn't land on Mars
you fucking retard.
Well, yeah, they did. They landed on
Mars, but not with humans you fucking
retard.
There's been nothing but unmanned missions
to Mars. Toe up, you're like fuck.
I think Casey really gave us a layup with the
fucking topic he brought up too.
No, they didn't land
on the moon, but they went to Mars.
They didn't... It's just...
Casey, you fucking... You're saying that they sent
like a manned mission.
That they orbited Mars, but didn't land.
Is that what you're getting at? Or was this
unmanned? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know how long it takes to get to Mars,
Casey? Yeah, like fucking nine
months. No, it takes years.
It takes nine months. It takes years.
Eleven months?
Still, no, they did not do that. I don't buy
it. I could be so uninformed,
but there's no fucking way. There's no way.
I know, I'm just fucking with you. Yeah.
Fuck!
What a dick!
I thought
she knew that. I mean, I thought
everybody who watched Ali Mac, I think, knew that.
I did know that.
So China says that they want
to get to the moon by 2030, but we're
just launching Artemis this year. We're like, we're going
back, motherfucker.
So is that like the fucking,
is that going to be like by SpaceX,
like funded by NASA? No, we are
we are straight up going NASA, baby.
Artemis is going.
You paid her for it with your $88.
Yeah, fucking $88.
Thanks, Joey Biden.
I wanted to buy a harmonica holster,
but you fucking made me pay $88
so I can't afford it.
Fucking, my harmonica
holster has to go on hold now
until I get paid next week.
Oh, Jesus.
Dude, you know, I was watching this interview with Neil Armstrong
and he was just like
so nonchalant about it.
He's just like, yeah, it was just like another
like, when we were waiting
to find out like if we were going to launch,
most of the time we just assumed it wasn't going to happen
so we didn't get excited about anything.
So he's like, oh, when it finally happened
it wasn't a big deal
because it was just like, we're so
like, they just didn't get their hopes up because it got
canceled so often.
And then when it did happen, it was just like, OK, it's another launch.
And he's a test pilot.
So they don't give a fuck. They're just like, this is
dude, they're used to landing
airplanes in the desert, like
untested airplanes.
You know, so they thought they weren't actually
going to the moon. Yeah, they didn't know when it was actually
going to happen. So they they were just
doing a standard like flyby on the moon.
So I don't think you get
to airport security with that. Oh, yeah.
So they were doing
a standard flyby and they said, well, we think the
conditions are right. We'll try and land.
And then he said they got the call from the president.
And then he's like, yeah, that was
cool. But we had so much work to do.
We just didn't care.
It was like they have they have them doing
so much tests. And there's like there's no time
for your mind to even wander.
I love space movies like that. Like Apollo
13 was crazy. Oh, yeah.
With fucking Tom Hanks.
Yeah, the guys that got off really good
are the ones who do fucking spacewalks and
on the ISS. Those
guys do have time to just sort of.
I mean, you're primarily doing. Yeah, you're primarily
doing work. But those guys actually
were able to just sort of be like,
huh. I mean, they sleep in space.
So that's that's going to be weird. But like,
did you ever see the pods that they sleep in in space?
They're all uncomfortable.
Like, I mean, I can't imagine
I don't think it would be comfortable.
I don't think it would be uncomfortable because like
you're not like laying on it. You're just kind of
floating there.
It's not nutting
for fucking a year.
You're getting so nut.
You're definitely nut.
You can fly away.
I fucking read something about if they were able to
masturbate or not, and I can't fucking remember
what it was. Just imagine like, just like.
That's going to drive your prostate cancer
as a dude. You got to
fucking get that out of there. You
leave that cooking for more than a month. That
brings your fucking rate up for
prostate cancer. Your chances of getting prostate cancer
go up? Yeah. It's not healthy to
keep that in you. You got to fucking
get that shit out of you.
It's not like nutting in space. It just goes.
Dan's like, damn, I got to start jerking off.
Dude, I would do it just out of like
an ego thing.
Just to be like, I don't want to like
seven people rub one out in space.
You just see the fucking
just floating around.
Just hits your fucking co-worker.
Hits the Russian in the back of the head.
Be like, I got you, fucker.
Oh, I'm going to come.
And then fucking just shoot it at the Russian
guy's head.
If you're in the ISS, I wonder what the tensions
were that day when fucking Ukraine.
The fucking Ukraine.
They're probably just like, hey, buddy. The US guys
are just slowly looking over.
Like, really, man? You fucking
cuss. There's like a self-destruct button.
And they're both like looking
at it.
The ISS just separates
into two pieces. So the actual reason
that was crazy with that is that
the only way that
the Americans could get home is on
the Russians thing.
But like, technically
the like all the research and stuff was American.
But the way to get back was Russian.
So they basically gave, they were like,
hey, we got shafted on that one.
But we're just like, hey,
we'll let you use your research
if you get us home type shit.
And they're like, alright, deal.
But also, let's think about fucking scientists. Scientists
aren't fucking like, you know,
like. They can fuck us over there.
They can really fuck us over and be like,
we're in the hatch first.
Well, Russia said that they would let
the International Space Station crash
into the ground. They're like, we'll just pull
out right now. And we're just like, fine, fuck you.
We'll take over.
Yeah, and they're just, they're like, we'll let the cosmonauts die.
We don't care.
Russia don't give a fuck.
Yeah.
The other thing I feel like you know
about when you're in NASA too is that the probability
of dying is pretty fucking good.
Like, you know there's a good
chance if you go up, you might not come down.
It's like with the space shuttle, it's like, okay,
well, there was like fucking eight of them.
Three of them are gone.
So that's not very good odds.
Those people knew that they were
dead like, as it was happening.
They knew they were dying all
at once. Yeah.
That's got to really suck.
Yeah, I watched a lot of World War II stuff this week.
The Challenger explosion?
The Challenger explosion looked pretty rad.
I mean, if you're gonna
If you're gonna
It looked pretty rad.
I'll tell you one thing, it probably wasn't pretty
rad being on board.
It was the opposite of pretty rad.
It was pretty not rad.
Apollo 1 looked pretty rad.
The one that fucking blew up
on the launch pad.
Were you alive for Apollo?
For the Challenger?
How old do you think Apollo is?
Jesus!
I was like 70.
No, the Challenger?
Black and white!
The Challenger was the 90s.
So one was the 80s.
There's the Challenger in Colombia.
Colombia happened in the
I think that was, I think it was like
the 90s.
How old do you think he is?
He did let that go unchecked a little bit more.
I remember when John F. Kennedy
said we were going to the moon!
Dude, Joe Biden
is 80 years old now.
I was watching like a thing about his like day to day thing.
Jesus!
I gotta talk about this
before I explode.
Does it include a lot of assistance with activities of daily life?
We've had enough explosions.
Does he wear a bib?
We can explode after the break.
No, I gotta talk about this.
Joe Biden
Joe Biden had a little speech
after the shooting happened.
He said that he didn't even
acknowledge that it happened. He was like
What? What happened?
The ice cream speech?
I got a whole fridge!
I got a cookie dough ice cream!
Don't believe me, it's upstairs!
I'm not joking!
It's like, dude, those dead kids!
I like ice cream!
Doesn't that shit happen every week?
Why do I care about this one?
It's like that guy!
It's not like anybody's gonna agree with his policies.
So you're
on an airplane, right?
And the pilot
walks on the plane.
And it's Joe Biden!
And he
starts to walk back
towards the back of the plane.
And a flight attendant
redirects him to the cockpit.
No, no, no, this way!
And he closes the door.
Do you get off the fucking plane?
Yes!
If that was your pilot of an airplane
The guy would not be allowed to be a pilot
on a fucking airplane!
But he's the commander in chief
of the largest military in the world!
I like ice cream!
Like what the fuck is going on?
This isn't even real. It's like, dude, it's not even like a partisan issue.
It's like, we're facing
World War fucking 3, and there's
nobody at the helm.
Nobody in control!
We're leaving the fucking pilot seat open!
It's like we literally have a country breathing down our neck that says
Hey, man, we're gonna use
thermonuclear weapons if you don't cut it the fuck out.
And this guy's talking about
his fucking ice cream.
This can't be real.
Because he's 80, man!
Why did you vote for him?
Yeah, but that's not in justification!
I didn't vote for him.
He's 80, yeah! Let's fucking
We're fucked! We're so
fucked in that
It comes down to like a fucking
last minute negotiation to like fucking
get us out of nuclear annihilation.
He's gonna be like, hey, what?
He's gonna wake up
and he's gonna be in like sundowners mode.
And he's not gonna know what the fuck
is happening.
He's gonna be like, oh, wait, which guy is this?
The little Kim Jong Asian guy?
No, no, Vladimir Putin.
Vladimir who?
It's like, dude, if we at least had somebody
like it doesn't matter who it is, they just have to
have like an appropriate responsibility.
Dude, but every second you got
without giving the approval to launch
the nukes, 50,000 people die!
Let's think about it! If Donald Trump
was fucking in the same position being, I don't fucking care
shoot him, I'll kill him.
That's it. Dude, we need a bully right now.
We need a fucking bully.
I'm sorry, dude.
Sometimes bullies are a good thing.
We can't have a softie in there.
We need a Trump. It's time to fucking fight.
And it's not time to fight,
but it's time to have someone in there.
Who would you suggest then, Casey?
Franklin Roosevelt? I don't know.
Wow! I'd love to take up Teddy Roosevelt
and revive him and be like, hey, be the president again.
Bro, I'm just saying, I'm just saying,
and this is coming from someone who, again, on the
spectrum, I'm a little bit more left leaning.
Which spectrum are we talking about?
Oh, fuck.
I'm not talking about the spectrum of politics.
I'm on the other one too.
There's someone on the spectrum.
You mean like the gay spectrum
or the autistic spectrum?
Regardless, on the
political spectrum,
I'm on the left side
just a little bit.
I'm very in the middle. But like,
right now, fucking Biden looks like the
biggest fucking pushover and the most
non-threatening like little
fucking douchebag.
When we add Trump in office, though,
and this is coming from someone who is against
Trump almost his entire presidency,
I would so much rather
have him as our president right now.
And I don't agree with a lot of what he says.
Trump gets in there and he gets
shit done.
You need someone in there who can be like,
you know he's gonna...
You even fucking look at America!
If you even fucking look at America,
I will fucking shove my cock down your throat!
He was a
deterrent in and of himself.
He's so unstable that
it scared everybody else.
And that's why I was like, oh my god,
we got an unstable guy. But they'll be like, me as president!
People will be like, I'm not gonna fuck with
him because he's just gonna be like, kill him!
I was like, damn,
Trump's fucking unstable.
And then Biden gets in office and I'm like, fuck man,
it actually worked! Get him back!
Exactly!
We need the Trumpster back!
2024, baby!
They asked Biden, they said,
what would you say to Putin
on using nuclear weapons?
He said,
don't. It's like, hey man,
we're gonna need a little bit of a better answer than
don't. If you fucking look at me,
I will rape your family!
Dude, you know...
No shit, don't! But maybe add a little bit more
of his ass. I will rape your eye holes!
You know he thought he was coming
across in a Clint Eastwood way.
But it's like he came across as
like an old man with dementia.
Like he missed the fucking
teeth grit. But again,
if you had fucking Donald Trump and he said,
and if Donald Trump was like,
don't, you'd be like,
okay.
Donald Trump would say something way fucking
way over that.
If you fucking nuke us,
I will fucking annihilate you!
You will never be remembered!
Your bloodbaths will be exterminated!
Your country would not be anything.
It would be nuclear sand.
Nuclear sand. Listen guys, do you want to be
nuclear sand? I bet you don't.
Your land wouldn't be happenable for 100,000
years. I bet you don't want that to happen.
So don't look at me, and
don't tell me my fucking country.
Because if you look at my fucking country, I will turn you into
sand. Nuclear sand. Just gone.
You know, I was thinking about this the other day.
Bullies, man.
Sometimes you fucking need
bullies. We need bullies in
today's society. Fucking if a kid's going around
being inside, I'm going to wear a dress.
Exactly.
There's an analogy for this.
Here comes the cancel Tyler, dial it back.
So this happened,
we saw this happen in nature,
when we took the wolves out of Yellowstone.
And the fucking deer proliferated
to the point that it was just like
all the animals had no predators anymore.
You need predators
in the fucking field. And then the whole
ecosystem got thrown off because there
was no predators. Because they
fucking take predators out.
So we need sharks.
We took the wolves out of Yellowstone, and that's what happened with the bullies.
The bullies would come
along, and keep everybody
in check. If your kid was acting
fucking weird.
You need strong leaders sometimes.
Just a little strange, you get beat up.
You get swirly. You go home and cry
and say maybe I won't do that fucking weird thing again.
Maybe I won't be a fucking psychopath anymore.
Yeah, so Joe Biden's
schedule. So he like wakes up at
7 a.m. and it's like, oh,
President Joe walks across the hall
to his personal dining room
where his personal chef makes
him breakfast.
Breakfast. Breakfast. Breakfast.
And then he goes to
the gym where his fucking personal
trainer, you know, has
him fucking walk with a walker
on the treadmill.
And then, you know, he goes at like
9 a.m. to the president's
briefing room
where he meets with all his cabinet members.
So at this point,
he has had nothing about politics
whatsoever.
Well, from like 9 to 5, he
like meets with his like
cabinet members. Yeah, but that's 9 a.m.
9 a.m., yup.
Till 5. So he has basically like
a 9 to 5 job with like
special circumstances.
I don't know, I just feel like
we've had more proactive presidents
that paid a little bit more. But then after,
it's like Joe gets in his limousine
with his aviators and goes out to eat
at like fancy restaurants
and shit like that. Or like he goes,
flies to fucking... I want you to do some
work, bud. Delaware. Like, fuck.
He fucking flies to Florida for the weekends.
Who's this? Buddy, you
Joe Biden. You fucking signed up
to be in that office for four years to lead
a country. You knew it was going to be a tough job.
You're running around in a fucking limousine
eating at fancy restaurants.
How about you put in some work? This ain't a
9 to 5 Monday through Friday gig, bud.
Yup. Fuck, man.
The senators work so hard.
Yeah, it takes weekends at
his house in Maryland or something. Are you
fucking...
And you're on his side.
The senators sleep in their offices.
It sounds like he has the life. He shouldn't.
It should age you like 50
years. He shouldn't be alive right now. He should be a fucking
rotting skeleton with the stress you're supposed
to have at that time. I actually read his
physical report.
Did you? Who's doing the physical?
He was a
healthy 80 year old male.
There's no such thing. He had
AFib.
He had really bad
GERD that makes him cough
all the time.
So he had another heart
arrhythmia that was
stable or something like that.
And hyperlipidemia.
But I think that was
on Lipitor. But there's
a bunch of stuff. You know,
like an 80 year old, there's something wrong
with everything. Oh yeah.
Fucking 80.
People didn't used to live past 40.
But he still works out with his walker
on the treadmill. Yeah, they don't
let him ride bikes anymore.
Oh yeah.
Or walk up the stairs of Air Force One.
Dude, he really struggles with that.
They gotta get him one of the fucking power
lifts.
I think we should elect Jimmy Carter
president again.
He's on his fucking deathbed.
Was he only on one term?
Yup. Dude, we can.
Bring him back.
Wait, he's alive? Yeah, he's
98. He's in hospice care.
Really? No, he actually killed himself.
No shit. Dude, I thought that guy
was dead. No, just like a few months ago, he
killed himself. Yeah, Jimmy Carter
killed himself. What are you talking about? He left a suicide
note that said his peat and farm withered.
His what? His peanut farm withered.
He was so upset that his peanut farm went down, he just
killed himself. What the fuck are you talking about?
No.
Yeah, look it up.
That's the most
ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
He fucking killed himself because his peanut farm went down.
The president? Yeah.
Jimmy Carter. He fucking killed himself
because his fucking peanut farm withered.
What is happening? I thought you said he was alive.
No, he killed himself. When?
Yesterday?
What the fuck is going on over here?
Unless he killed himself yesterday, I didn't hear about this.
Or today.
Dan, what's the fact check on this?
The fact check is I fucking made it up.
Wikipedia says that he's 98.
The fact check is that I fucking made it up.
His peanut farm.
98 years old.
I can't believe that guy's alive.
It's like finding, I don't know.
A dinosaur? It's like finding a pet
you had is still alive.
It's like, what? Jimmy Carter?
No way.
He didn't know he was alive?
What year was he president? From 77 to 81.
Yeah. Get him back.
Get him in there. Oh my god.
98. What a good run. Fucking called with a bullpen.
He would definitely do better.
Wait, how the fuck did that work out?
What?
He would definitely do better than Joe Biden.
That doesn't match up time periods.
What?
If he ended in one.
He looks like fucking
autistic rain man.
What?
Like the fucking numbers I can see
going on in your head.
That doesn't match up.
Get him back in office.
The orbital ecomosis guy.
That doesn't match up though.
Like, it,
the time periods.
It does. No.
Tyler, it does. No, it doesn't.
He was president when he was
in his 50s.
How the fuck does that...
He wasn't that old. He was 20, 20, 2016.
Oh, wait, that still doesn't
match up. The presidency starts on
an odd year. Are you denying reality?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It goes back in time. The presidency started
in 77 to 81.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just saying
if it's an odd number, we shouldn't be in
an even number right now.
With presidencies.
Like, it shouldn't be, like, if it was like 81,
then it shouldn't be, like,
2024 when we're electing. It should be
like 2025 or 2023.
Like, it doesn't make sense that they're
because it shouldn't be in,
if it's an even number, it would be
an even number. If it's an odd number,
then every single year for an
election, it would be an odd number. You know
what I'm saying? Like, because
it's supposed to go in four-year spurts.
And if it was 81,
then it should be,
like, it shouldn't be.
It's when you elect, though.
No, no, no, no. Because, like, when he gets out of
office, it would be
like that. So,
it doesn't make sense. That's fucking
weird. How does it do that?
Where's the year, where'd that year go?
What's going on?
Bro,
you're blowing my fucking mind.
He's saying, cause the elections
occur in even years. He's not
understanding how he took office in an odd
numbered year. But,
isn't it? Yeah, because you become
president after
January. The election, yeah, the
election takes place in an even
year. But you don't take office until it's odd.
Oh, the people got assassinated.
Right.
No, that's not how it works. Well, no,
it's still every 20 years. It's still,
yeah, it's still the same term. No, but then another
president, oh yeah, it would be every 40 years. No, the vice president
takes over until the term is over.
Weird. So where the fuck does that
odd number come in? Is there any way to have like a
midterm? Because they don't take
office until the odd numbered year.
Yeah, so if you like die on the second
to last day of presidency,
the vice president would be president for
a day. No, no, no,
there's gotta be something weird
happening. Tyler, we've explained it.
Um,
you don't take office
until the odd year begins.
You don't serve as the president until
it's an odd year.
Yeah, like
the election occurs
in the even numbered year.
2020 and 2021.
Hey, that
doesn't make sense.
Fuck. Look at
this picture of, uh,
I don't know how that makes sense. It's a picture of Joe
Biden. Tyler, they're elected.
Jimmy Carter. It's 2020, right?
Look how young he was. Joe Biden.
Oh my god. That was like not that long ago.
Tyler, you're elected
in 2020, right? No.
I don't get it. No, but you are. You're
elect. So the election is held.
Okay. This election takes place
in 2020.
We elected Joe Biden as our president
in 2020.
He was the president
elect for a handful of months.
2021 begins.
Then he takes
office. So he
will be serving until 2025.
No, he'll be serving until 2024.
No,
because, no, because
you don't become the president the day you're
elected. There's time in between those
two. No. Yes.
That's not how that works. Oh my fucking
god.
Tyler, I don't know what, I don't know what you
want me to say here. That's not how that works.
So you're telling me that we
just time travel for presidents?
Dude, how
much weed did you smoke?
That's not what I'm
saying, bro. His term
began in 2021.
No, his term began in 2020.
No, he was elected in
2020. No, no, no, no, no, no.
He was elected and his term started
2020.
I'm just fucking with you guys.
Just really fucking with you. I knew you,
I knew you were fucking with me, but I should have
picked up on it earlier.
Dude, I was like, I was going down a fucking rabbit
hole yesterday that even continued into
today. Like,
because I watched this video of Peter
Zon, Zion, you know who he is?
I can't say I do. He like works for the government
and he's like, he like predicts like potential
like outcomes.
Yeah, if scenario is like
going on between the US and other countries.
And he said if Ukraine
wins, he goes, there's definitely going to be
like a nuclear exchange between
US and Russia.
Like that's, that's, it's just going to
happen. Yeah, it would be a lot more peaceful
if they just fucking took them over, unfortunately.
Yeah, just, dude,
just give it fucking back to Russia.
Like, what the fuck are we doing here? So I was like
looking up, I'm like, OK, if like,
like what, what places would be hit if
we had a nuclear attack? So they try
and hit other nukes. Like, that's what they aim
for. So in
the center of the country is what's called the nuclear
sponge. Yeah, you were talking
about that yesterday. Yeah, so it's like, it's
like where all the nukes are like all
put together so that hopefully
they try and strike that first
rather than the large cities,
right? Interesting. So
I'm like, let me see
if I can see one of these fucking missile
silos from
Google, Google Maps. They don't
fucking black that shit out? Dude, so
they said that the nuclear sponge, the bulk
of it is like on the border of Nebraska,
Wyoming, and Colorado.
So I zoomed in and there's
there's one of those pins
and it says, uh, M
M three launch. I'm like,
no, no, yeah,
minute man three launch site
and it shows it and I'm like,
and it says it's a transportation service.
I'm like, fuck
this. I even wrote a message to
Google. I'm like, hey, you guys might want to take
this tag off because
if I can find this one, I can find other
ones. And just like going down the
street, like I, oh, dude,
I found like 10 of them, like 10. They
are already know where it is. Well, I think
what they probably do is
they, or maybe
this is what I actually think. Those are
duds. Those are dummy sites.
You don't know. Yeah, because those
can be dummy sites and the ones that they actually
have. No one knows
where they are. Well, the thing is, is
they don't really care. Like if
you know about them, because I was reading this article
that said the Russians
and the US exchange,
like people to inspect
their nuclear sites.
That's weird. Why would they do that? For
treaty purposes, because they have to make sure that
they're up to spec and following the treaties.
So the Russians know where all their nukes
are. And we know where all theirs are. But
I don't think that anybody should just be able to go
on Google and search
Minuteman 3 launch site
and be able to see exactly where it is. You gotta
think about it. Did Google get back to you on that?
No, I just said, hey,
like, I don't know who added this tag, but it might
not be a good idea to like keep it up.
You know, I just I feel like that's kind
of a security risk. Yeah, I mean,
but the thing you gotta think about though, too, is that
those nukes have travel time. If they shoot at us,
we know they shot at us.
We'll have time to act appropriately.
We can probably accurately estimate
where they're gonna land, to be honest.
I'd be surprised if we didn't have the technology
to do that. I think that we have the
technology to stop them mid
flight and detonate
them wherever they are.
I know, you got the whole laser
theory. I believe that these flying triangles, that's part of their purpose.
It's not just targeting, but even capturing them and containing them to some degree.
And taking them somewhere else.
Fucking return to sender.
That's like the...
Like we're not even...
I just picture a big cartoon hand like catching the dude.
Turn around and throw him.
Dude, that would be the ultimate
retaliation. It's just the fucking hand that catches it.
Live stream it from a drone.
Not even launch yours.
Just turn theirs around and drop it back up.
Because then you didn't do it.
Yeah, they did it to themselves.
You think it's break time?
Alright, we'll be back
on Untitled
Podcast.
Hey, it's the iTyler again.
That was some real stupid shit, huh?
It's like when you give
four idiots with ADHD mics.
But what do I know?
I'm just controlled by that commie bastard
Casey. I fucking hate commas.
Anyway, for the next
part of the episode we explore some
equestrian topics for the horse lovers
out there. God damn it, Casey.
Here we go.
Hey there.
I know it's
hard to feel
like I don't
care at all.
Where you are and how you feel
under these lights on the best of
views.
Welcome back to Untitled Podcast.
Getting emo.
Tyler's getting emo.
So obviously you guys were all emo back in high school, right?
Were you?
I can't make it on my own!
Because my heart is in Ohio!
One of my favorite albums is
Take This To Your Grave by Fall Out Boy.
Oh, god damn it.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry, I'm
so sorry, I'm so sorry.
Today is another day of
emo.
Tomorrow, I'm going to be
destroyed by Fall Out Boy.
I'm going to be destroyed by Fall Out Boy.
Come on,
wipe me in.
You should come to emo night tomorrow.
It's like 20 dollars tickets.
It's cheap.
Maybe, we'll see.
my girlfriend. I'm sure she's not going to be having the best time of her life.
But she's going to be like, she's going to be like, did my boyfriend just get
spear tackled in the fucking, in the fucking match?
So, Tyler, what were you running down here to talk about?
Nothing.
No, you said we were talking upstairs and you were like, we got to talk about this
on the podcast. I don't know. You guys are talking about it.
I just said that we should talk about it.
I think we lost a little momentum.
I think you're talking about nicotine.
Oh, yeah.
Nicotine has never been proven to be
a victim, just like CPR has never been proven to be effective.
No, but like nicotine definitely is addictive because I fucking Dean, like I
was using just the nicotine pouches and that shit had me fucking crazy like
feeding, but it could. I mean, if we really want to do it, though,
I mean, it could just be the oral fixation because that burn gives it gives me the
same kick sort of because once you get addicted to nicotine, you lose like the
psychoactive, like head high of it.
Not really.
I mean, for me, I mean, I've made so much.
I never get lightheaded. I never get that feeling.
It's just if I don't get nicotine, if I don't vape every like half hour.
OK, now I do think nicotine is addictive because I swat.
No, I think I feel like I want to kill people after like two hours with that.
No, no, no.
Addictive when I get that, I know.
But when I get like the zero nicotine
vapes, I was so convinced they worked the first time I quit and I vape so much more
than I used to now and I did the zero nicotine ones.
And I'm like this fucking thing.
Get this fucking thing out of my face.
How do you think I feel right now?
Can you come over tonight like fuck you?
No.
Fine. I'll be over in 20 minutes.
Yeah, do it.
I can't imagine.
Like, I feel like shit.
I felt I mean, I felt so empowered quitting
nicotine the first time that I went back and it's just like, all right, well,
I don't have the willpower to do that.
I want to start it just to quit it so I can feel this empowered.
It does.
You feel you feel like you're on top of the world when you're kicking.
When you're like, yeah, you're like, I'm fucking.
Yeah, it's like, like, like, I can fight God.
I'm quitting vaping for the rest of the park.
It's like, I don't know, being a police officer.
I'm leaving a call like a bad call or something.
It's the same thing with what we did.
OK, you don't have to use a cop.
I'm not going to say that because that's just stupid.
You know what?
You're a hero.
I agree.
Be less war stories.
But it's like that same kind of feeling that you're like overcoming something.
Or that like it's a challenge for you and it's causing you pain.
But I kind of got addicted to that feeling,
that feeling of like overcoming things.
Yeah.
I feel like staying up for 36 hours straight.
I'm not really like that.
I'm high.
I'm just like,
just like seeing how many things I could cut out.
You know,
like in my basically surviving on like salads and water.
That sucks.
It sucks.
Why do you like why do you get up every morning when you live like that?
I don't know. I really don't.
I just sleep in.
Yeah.
Like why do people like do things that like what motivates people to do things
that don't directly benefit them like people like soldiers that go to war?
What motivates them to die?
The thrill of the charge, the battlefield,
the desire to be part of something.
Yeah.
Like I was watching like a World War Two movie and they were like, oh,
we've got to send four thousand troops to save three hundred thousand.
And they're all going to get slaughtered.
And Winston Churchill was like, OK, let's do it.
Oh, my God.
So they all died.
Bro, we're so close to that happening.
Like, what's the point, though, especially if you're not like,
there is no point.
And it's just like, it's like your life is just like you're just disposable.
Like if the government decided, hey, we're going to war with Russia tomorrow.
Like, we're all going to.
You're so disposable.
It's not even the wars getting excited.
Guess what? You're all invited.
It looks like I'm a transgender.
Welcome to the meat grinder.
In Germany and World War Two,
they had conscription from the age of 16 to 65.
God damn.
Yeah, at the end of the war, they did.
God damn.
Like you turn like for two days before you get pulled in.
You're like, I don't think.
Yeah, because two days away because Hitler was fucking.
I watched that movie Downfall and it was like fucking losing it.
He was losing it from the beginning.
And that's like, you know, like, I'm going to come in and save him.
And his fucking generals are just shooting themselves in the head in front of them.
Cards, there's somebody fucking just guys just blowing their heads off in front of
them. He's like, oh, this guy's going to come and save us in Berlin.
And they're like, no, he's not like they're all dead.
Oh, my God.
And then fucking Eva Braun or Joseph Goebbels, his wife.
He has a bunch of children in the bunker with him.
Right. So they're like, oh, well, we got to kill our children because if there's
no national socialism, then there's no life.
So they fucking take like cyanide pills and then like make the kids drink it
while they're sleeping.
And then the ladies kill their kids.
It's fucked up.
Do you know that?
Yeah, yeah, that's a real thing.
Do you know that the average horse produces 15 horsepower?
Wow, I thought you were going to say 15 liters of semen.
I thought it was going on the comrade.
I really did.
He had me fooled.
Last episode. Yeah, dude, we fucking talked about that.
Anyway, dude, I saw this whole thing.
He's to talk where this this check was like this was literally a tick tock.
She was like masturbating a horse and it was for like, wait, what?
Hold on a second.
Wait, what?
Yes, it was.
How did you find that?
It was on tick tock.
Was it on tick tock or was it on like what are those horse semen.
Come on.
So it was for like medical reasons, though.
Horse semen.
That's a cool reason for her, the horse.
I showed my girlfriend.
She's like, yeah, I think they have to do that occasionally.
So anyway, there's like this horse face filter that this guy put on.
So I don't know.
Was she hot?
She was hot.
Yeah, but it wasn't like a sexual thing.
She was just like rub one out for the horse because apparently you have to do
that occasionally, but this guy had prostate cancer.
Was the horse going?
No, he was just like moving his leg a little bit.
It wasn't like weird at all.
The horse is going.
It's like, obviously, this is like a veterinarian thing going on here.
But because she was like, why can't my doctor do that?
Right.
But because she was like Dr.
Cunning from fucking Dr.
Krauss, I'd let her fucking do that.
But there's this guy that like he put
his face at the end of the video with like a horse face filter on it.
Like I'm next, you know.
I don't know. You would have had to see it.
I don't know how you got going down that route.
The horse sex.
Oh, Mr.
Hans, we love horse come here.
Come at a horse's semen.
Horse semen, horse come, horse man goo.
We love it all.
On title podcast sponsored by horse semen.
All right. What do you think?
Talk about that on the last one.
Yes, we did talk about horse semen.
So that's why I'm saying this.
I think listen, buddy, horse semen, number one.
I think we covered the topic already quite thoroughly.
I don't think we horse semen.
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So I was looking at this the other day.
What percent of police officers do you think have discharged their weapon
on a call in their career?
Twenty five percent less than five percent less than one percent.
Half of one percent.
Really? No.
Twenty seven percent.
No fucking way.
Makes sense. Think about how long you're on the job in the career.
I don't believe there's so many police officers.
I thought most people they interviewed people and most people thought like 83
percent thought what do you say?
Eighty three percent of people thought that the police officers have always
discharged like all police officers. Yeah.
Oh, man. I thought it was like barely.
Yeah. I mean, that makes sense.
You're going to come across a situation where you're going to have to do it.
At some point,
let's just fucking go back to the fucking god damn it.
Let's go back to the fucking media saying
that cops are just shooting people left and right.
Of course, retards are going to think
that fucking cops shoot their weapons every fucking day.
Fuck you. You can't say that word.
It's hard.
You can't say the C word.
You can't say cop.
We're trying to fucking not get canceled here.
That's 70.
What you said is 20.
We don't take the same place.
Yeah.
Seventy three percent.
Come on. Don't ever shoot the gun.
Never discharge your weapon.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
I'd say it's pretty fucking good, too.
You would think it would happen more often.
No, it wouldn't.
Dude, it's crazy how you can just like
wake up in the morning and just see cops get murdered.
I know I've talked about that before, but that's just like when you wake up
to shit like that, that's got to do something to your brain.
Like the kind of stuff we see like on Facebook and Instagram now.
That's just so readily available.
Like just like waking up and seeing people get murdered.
It's like they didn't have that back in the day.
Yeah.
But what if you're a cop and you had to kill somebody?
It normalizes it.
It desensitizes you to a certain extent.
How would that affect your psyche?
Psycho, you know?
Like if it's a killer, is he normalized?
Like, would he?
No, like if you had to kill someone as a cop, how do you think you could live with that?
I would live with it. I'd be fine with that.
Well, it depends on if they needed it or not.
Yeah.
I mean, if you fucking killed somebody by accident,
if somebody has a fucking gun on somebody and you genuinely believe if you don't
kill him, he's either going to fucking kill you or somebody else,
just fucking kill him.
I mean, I'm sure you'd struggle with it sometimes, but it's justified in your head.
You're doing what you signed up to do.
Yeah.
I mean, dude, if it's something I think it would fuck you up worse in a war.
It's not killing somebody who's fighting for their country.
I don't think, you know, people, you know, the whole fucking it was either me or them
type thing, like they're going to kill me.
I don't fucking care.
Yeah.
I feel like that's kind of the mindset you have to have.
Yeah, dude, I saw this video.
It's a healthy mindset to have in that situation.
I saw this video the other day where the cop, like he goes up to the car and he
opens the door and the guy's got a gun on his lap and he goes, gun, gun.
And he just unloads a clip on this guy.
And then he realizes that it's an undercut for cop and it's his friend.
Oh, geez.
And he starts freaking the fuck out,
screaming and his friend.
Yeah, it was his friend undercover.
Yeah.
Like talk about like, it's like, well, dude, maybe the guy probably wasn't aiming
the gun at you. I'm sure he wasn't.
Yeah, that was definitely completely unjustified.
Yeah.
Unload a clip on him.
Right.
I saw on the other day where the guy shoots two shots from a trailer inside like an RV.
Oh, I saw that one.
The guy fucking fucking pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.
The cops are like falling over each other like storm troopers, like trying to shoot
them, they shoot them like they shoot the RV 67 times and they missed every time.
I didn't see that one.
It's kind of hard to snipe the head.
No, because they're shooting at an RV.
They're not shooting anybody, you know.
So did they kill the guy or no?
No, no.
They just the person came out.
He's like, OK, OK, I get the fucking point, guys.
No, they're like tripping over each other.
Like the one guy's like falling down and he just goes on the ground.
He gets his piss out.
He's shooting while he's falling down still.
What the fuck was he doing?
Dude, that guy lucked the fuck out.
It was in a major city.
It's a volunteer.
It's a volunteer police department.
People would do it for free to do it.
Yeah.
Thinking of power fucking crazy.
That's why they make the fucking regulation so hard to become a police officer.
Are they that hard?
No, he couldn't be.
Come on.
No, I'm a cop.
Not after this.
This is a private domicile.
You said you said you failed the vision test.
Yeah, for the troopers, not the fucking local cops.
Not the GV team.
Yeah.
But the real cops.
I'm saying you would definitely fail the psych test.
No, I passed the site test.
Jesus.
So psych tests are so fucking stupid, though.
Dude, all those psych tests are fucking stupid.
Like they ask you fucking weird.
Like it's all like their psych test is there's like, all right,
we're going to hook you up to a lie detector test and ask you a bunch of weird
questions. Polygraphs are so fucking inaccurate.
Yeah. But like one of the questions I vividly remember there is like, all right.
So did you stop having sex with animals?
And I'm like, what?
There's like, answer the question, please.
I'm like, I never started.
So you're lying.
Tell us more.
Yes.
Like, look, I went to fucking horse come back.
I went to horse come back.
But fucking like he looks like he just wants to fucking on alive.
I was thinking how I would answer that question.
Yeah.
What is the proper way to answer that question?
No, I never started.
Next question.
No, because like I was sitting there, I want people to say, I was like,
I never started.
It's not judging the answer.
It's judging your response to it.
Yeah.
Like it was like, but like another one was,
do you have sexual fantasies about your own mother?
I'm like, no.
But even if I did
none of your business, like, look, it was one dream.
OK, I didn't ask for the dream.
It's like, yeah, that's fucking like, like there's another one.
It's like, do you like to torture small animals?
And I might know like I'd be dumb enough to tell you.
I feel like if you're like weird shit,
sergeants like I fucking love this guy, get him in here.
I don't know.
I feel like I feel like they probably use the polygraph just to weed out people.
They don't like they don't want.
Yeah, that's true.
A lot of people fail the polygraph and they have to go back like three, four.
Yeah, because there's really no way to like correctly, truly evaluate pseudoscience.
Yeah, pseudoscience.
It's just a blanket for like, this guy's fucking weird.
But then there's like actual there's like actual questions like,
have you ever taken drugs?
And I'm like, I literally haven't.
That's true.
I'm like, OK.
And there's like, have you ever sold drugs?
I'm like, no.
Like, and like they have like questions like that in between fucking bat shit.
Insane questions like I would have failed both of those.
They're evaluating the polygraph.
They're like they're evaluating the polygraphs.
It's like, fuck, he's a liberal.
When's the last time we hired a liberal?
Oh, sorry, buddy.
We hired one last week.
Yeah, no, we can't take you.
My favorite was fucking another one.
This is like, so you jerk off more than five times a day.
I'm like, no.
I'm like, maybe when I was like 14, I did.
But like, not now.
And I was like, yes or no.
I'm like, no.
You jerk until it's raw.
So they asked you all these fucking weird questions.
I'm like, what the fuck?
Jesse.
Yeah.
But like, it's just fucking weird, man.
Like a lot of weird shit.
So can we talk about this fucking voice?
I shit in depth a little bit.
You didn't do it yet.
What about it?
I know I didn't do it, but I'm saying like the just think of the shit that they're
going to be able to fucking like, we're not going to know.
People like politicians are always going to be able to fall back on the fact, like
if any clips of them ever come out in the future or videos or something like that,
like they'll just be able to straight up deny it and say it was fucking AI.
We're not going to know what's real and fake soon.
Like this time again, I could make me say something very racist.
Oh, yeah.
And I might have sabotaged this episode before.
If Casey forgets to turn it out.
Yeah, yeah.
But it wasn't Tyler.
It was AI.
It was ridiculous.
It was crazy how realistic that sounded.
Yeah, I was just like you.
Like what type of implications do you think we're going to have because of what
was happening because like it's so indistinguishable already.
Like it's mostly there with pictures and voice, but it will get there with video
pretty quickly, I'm sure if we already got the pictures down.
Yeah.
I'm just waiting for the Taylor Swift fake.
Well, never mind.
No, it's already out.
Oh, yeah.
There's a lot of those.
It's already out there, man.
I haven't been in the game for a while.
I have to hop back in for a little bit.
Yeah, you scared you.
Alcohol, marijuana or pornography.
Get one day.
You could do one back per week.
I think you're talking about that on podcast.
I'll fucking fuck
Tarantino like talked about how he thought that Top Gun was about being gay.
Yeah. Yeah.
No, it's true. You can look it up.
He goes in depth with it a little bit.
He's like ice.
He's gay.
Yeah.
And there's just like sexual tension between him and Tom Cruise.
And like when you watch the movie and you're like thinking about that, it kind of
holds up. Yeah.
But I also thought that he's like, what is that bite?
What is that bite that Iceman does?
I also think that mouse game there.
I also think that Quentin Tarantino is fucking insane.
Oh, absolutely.
The dude's fucking out of his mind.
He directs a damn good movie.
So Pulp Fiction best movie of all time, my opinion.
You ever see Once Upon a Time in Hollywood?
That's the that is the one movie I have yet to see.
I have it on DVD.
I just haven't watched it yet.
Apparently, yes, I still buy DVDs.
It's that's that's like Quentin.
Come
on.
Horse come back now.
Now it's just going to be fucking randomly interrupted with whenever they
decide to play a sound clip.
Let's play again.
Is that Tyler's voice?
Yeah, I'm trying to. I don't know why I won't buy
horse come dot com.
Sounds like horse come dot com.
Even better.
Horse come.
That's fucking marketing at its finest.
Horse come dot com.
It's going to be like eventually like a problem with identity theft and shit.
Security.
What's the title of this episode going to be?
You can take a security video.
You can fake a security video.
You can fake a CCTV clip and provide it to the police like 20 years ago.
I know.
But now it's going to be so easy.
It's going to be so publicly available like horse come back.
They're just going to have to make it so
they're going to have to raise the penalty for making a deep fake.
There is no penalty for it.
Right now, it's going to be a lawless there.
Some bad stuff.
But then are you intruding on freedom of speech at that point?
That's a thing.
You're presenting fake evidence.
Yeah.
No, but if you're just deep faking somebody for falsifying evidence, that's a fucking serious.
No, I mean, I get that's a fucking that's a crime.
But like just deep faking somebody in general shouldn't be a crime.
Yeah, that's tough.
That's a tough issue.
That's why I go back and forth on it.
To be honest, it's hard for me to develop like don't get me wrong.
I'm all for rights of course.
Come back home.
But like the shit that weirds me out, too, is like I remember like when all this stuff
was starting to get big, I was like, oh, man, like this.
Like now I'm going to be able to listen to like new little peep.
And then at the same time, like, isn't that kind of fucked up, though?
There was a black mirror episode about that.
Yeah, it's like fucking someone that's a deceased.
They can't consent.
Like, and it's just isn't that's very fucking morbid, too.
And that episode, Miley Cyrus was like the celebrity Miley Cyrus.
And she was she like had an accident because her manager killed her, tried to kill her.
And she was like out of vent.
But they were still making like AI songs of her.
Hey, this manager was profiting off of it.
It's the all right.
Sorry.
You said Black Mirror.
Yeah, I was deaf.
Yeah, I remember that now.
It's the climb Miley Cyrus.
That's pretty crazy.
That's like one of the first.
I mean, I can't even say that a lot of the black mirror shit has come true.
And when a lot of those episodes came out.
Oh, yeah.
Remember that like one with like the pedophile guy and they had to have like a death match at the end?
Yeah.
Yeah, that was a weird one.
Yeah, because they fucking hacked his computer and fucking.
They knew he was jerking off the kiddie porn.
I just thought it was like porn like the whole time, like just standard porn.
And I'm like, why is he like doing that?
That was a big twist.
Yeah.
Like if it was just standard porn, I'd be like, whatever, dude, like whatever.
I feel like it's like fucked with my head, like the Christmas episode.
Which one was that?
The one with John Ham where you got it.
I've seen them all, but I know they're looking at a cabin telling stories about
how they're like they're like imprisoned in this cabin telling stories about how
they got there and the one guy like worked as like a dude who would like
invent this A.I. that would do tasks for people like help them with their
household, like organization stuff.
Yeah, but the person they would like torture the little person that's inside
there, that's actually like a conscious human.
They're like, oh, well, if you're not going to do this, you can just see what
one thousand years with nothing feels like.
And then he just like clicks a button.
It's like one thousand years for like the little person in there.
They're like, no, please, I'll do anything.
This is black.
Yeah.
I have to check that.
It's fucking black mirror.
Yeah, it's a total fucking mind.
It's fucking crazy because it's like it's like all about like if technology goes
too far type shit. Yeah.
And then the other dude like gets blocked by his wife on like the social media site.
But he like can't see her in person.
So he can't like when he looks at her, he just he's like a blacked out picture.
And he can't talk to her or his kids like ever again.
So it's like just fucked up like that.
That'd be really funny if you just block somebody on social media.
They just turn to a block.
Yeah.
And then he like at the end, he gets blocked by everybody in the world.
So this is like, yeah, talk to it.
It's like social isolation.
So does he kill himself?
No, that just it just ends with him just not being able to see the faces of anybody.
He's just walking around and just seeing like grayed out faces.
That's so fucked up.
Bodies.
And there's one where like you're pretty much like your Facebook rating determines
like your social class.
Oh, it's like that one episode of Community.
Yeah, essentially.
Meow meow beans.
Yeah.
A lot of that shit in black mirrors going to come true in like 10 years.
Yeah, like a lot of it already has.
And when it came out, it was already so like dystopian and fucking weird.
And like it already is starting.
I mean, we have Joe Biden as a president.
There's that one where they had like the puppet as the president.
Right.
Yeah.
So it's Joe Biden.
Oh, they have the member of the first episode where they had the president and
they're like, you got to fuck this pig, like the prime minister of the UK.
Yeah, we kidnapped the princess and we got to like you got to fuck this pig or
we're going to kill her.
He's got live TV.
Yeah.
That's so fucked up.
And he does it.
Yeah.
I mean, it's like your daughter got captured and the only way to save her was
to fuck a pig. Would you fuck a pig?
I mean, you'd probably do anything to save your daughter.
So would you go to horse come?
I got
you.
He's not having that one more time.
I
don't know.
Yeah, man, you know, I think that
what could be a potential is we got used to everybody got used to walking down
right during the pandemic.
We're going to be cute people.
Well, now, if you if you launch a nuke, right, and a new kid somewhere on the
East Coast, right, it's like now everybody's going to be afraid of radiation poisoning.
So now people are really going to stay the fucking side.
Oh, yeah. We're fucked if the new kids like New York City or something.
No, actually, if a new just hits New York City and not like
around here,
the jet stream takes it west and like like semi northwest and it won't hit us.
The radiation won't even come near us.
It actually will go towards the Finger Lakes region and up towards Canada.
Good.
It's Canada.
That's where it belongs.
No, but we the only one we'd have to worry about is Boston.
But even Boston's jet stream would go northwest.
So it would be like Albany's here.
Fucking New York City is going this way.
Boston is going this way.
So literally we'd be in a like the area.
That's just fine.
What the fuck, dude, then we're really going to be locked down.
That's just going to be serious because then it's like everybody's just going to
stay home. They're not going to leave their houses.
They're going to have to get like a special service done on their house that
like seals it up. Right.
So like the radiation particles can't get in.
Everything's going to be delivered in special vans and people are just going to
have no reason to go outside.
There's going to be special vans that take you to your place of employment.
Oh, my God, dude.
That sounds like they would love that.
That's still be in future.
Then you're actually locked down.
Yeah, actually locked down.
You're ahead of cattle.
And it's like, oh, you want to cause problems.
We shut your power off at your house.
Now you're fucked.
Now you can't go outside.
Now you're really fucked and you're contaminated.
If you go outside, right, without the government's permission,
and you didn't properly decontaminate, you're contaminated.
And you can't come around people, which is what happens right now.
Right.
Which is what is happening right now.
If you have covid or if you're not covid vaccinated,
sort of on a really low level, but maybe the purpose of covid.
Well, that's what it was in the lockdown.
It was actually to get these systems in place.
Yeah.
So that when something like this, like a nuclear.
Well, that's exactly how it is in Wuhan right now, when they're locking everybody
in their apartments and people are starving.
Yeah, that's exactly like that.
It was last I saw a few months ago.
They're still doing a bunch of lockdowns like that in China.
Yeah.
China's scum should be wiped off the place of employment.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
That's a little harsh.
I don't know if we've got anything to back that up.
But they do some shady shit.
There are enemies.
I don't think they are, though.
I mean, dude, they're doing some shady shit, but we do the shadiest shit.
Yeah, we do the shadiest shit for freedom.
Right.
It's like USA.freedom.com.
Shadyshit.com.
That's definitely something.
Probably.
That's definitely something.
You look that up, you're definitely going to call them.
Shadyshit.com.
If you want to see some real shady shit, you can come on.
Shadyshit.com.
Oh, dude.
But yeah, just imagine that, dude.
Like, fuck, they want to keep us in place, like just like in The Matrix, dude.
Oh, yeah.
Everybody can work from home now.
It got everything set up so that this system can take place.
I just got to say something real quick.
I hate the Antichrist.
No, I hate him.
I hate the Antichrist.
Who is the Antichrist?
William Defoe.
Dude, William Defoe has a huge cock.
Probably does.
No, he does.
He probably just mushroom stamps everything.
Have you ever seen The Lighthouse?
The Lighthouse?
That was weird.
The Lighthouse?
No.
It's got him and Robert Pattinson in it.
There's gay, gaily sexual tension for each other the whole time.
What the fuck?
But like you see William Defoe's like massive, scary cock.
It's like fucking huge for no reason.
Is it like actually?
It's actually huge.
It's fucking scary, dude.
I feel like if I.
Oh, yeah.
She like cuts his or no, she cuts her own fucking clit off.
Yeah.
Her own hood?
Her clitoral hood?
Yep.
Damn.
Ow.
She like possessed or something by the.
Or no, what does he cut it off or she cuts her own?
I don't remember.
It's gotta be awkward.
I just know that he jerks off to the light of the lighthouse.
He like put scissors in her vagina.
I feel like this podcast covers a lot of masturbation.
Maybe next time.
Horse come back out.
Maybe next time.
Maybe a little less.
We'll talk about masturbation a little less.
We got to get back to conspiracy theories and shit.
Like we've been going off the rails a lot.
We're not even off the rails.
We're in the fucking woods.
We derailed and rolled down a cliff.
We're in a fucking swamp.
Ended up in another dimension.
We're fucking Marianas Trench level right now.
This is bad.
Don't you want to live in a time before we had society?
No.
Like when it was just like hills and stuff and trees.
Well, we still have that.
Why the fuck would you want to live there?
You don't have anything to entertain yourself.
You just sit there and you're hardly self-aware.
Like China.
Casey, you're a fucking big red.
Can we hit the Casey's made a stupid point button again?
Oh, boy.
I would just like to.
I'd like to go back to the Middle Ages.
Yeah, there you go.
I'd be a Templar.
It's just like a simpler time.
You have to worry about like all this.
You just got to build a pyramid or two.
Yeah, I'd be a Templar, bro.
I'd take back the Holy Land.
Middle Ages, not fucking ancient Samaria.
Dude, just imagine.
Fucking Aztecs would fight over the right to fucking kill themselves because they
thought it would bring themselves salvation.
Dude, just imagine like back in the day before gunpowder just war back then.
You just go up with swords and shit and stab people and they would have swords
and they would try to stab you.
And that was the only thing.
Like there was no guns.
There was nothing that would hit you from right here stabbing people.
Somebody has a bow and arrow.
You're like, it's a wizard.
Holy shit.
This is something I was going to touch on earlier.
Like how barbaric the fucking I think we talked about this.
The Vikings were. Oh, yeah.
How they would just like fight to the death.
Do we talk about how the Russians are actually there?
They're a Viking tribe.
Like that's where they came from.
I don't think so.
They're the Rus tribe.
Russian Vikings are from Russia.
Well, they're one of the Viking tribes.
Scandinavian.
Yeah, the Rus.
So Ruskies.
You hear people call Russians.
Yeah.
But, um, yeah, no, dude, they they fucking were known for fighting to the death.
Like even when they are outnumbered, they would just they're like, oh, well,
we're going to die fighting.
Like that's that's what they're going to do if it comes down to nuclear war.
And they said that.
And that's like, OK, well, we're like, fuck you.
We'll blow up the world first.
Yeah. But they're like literally like, oh, well, if it's a nuclear exchange,
like at least we'll die and go to heaven and the Americans will croak.
So it's like, we'll die and go to heaven, too.
And we'll still we'll still be like, we'll go to the same place.
We'll be like these fucking assholes.
And you guys would all go to hell.
I'd go to heaven.
It'd be fine.
Why am I going to hell?
You fucking don't like Jesus.
I never said that.
You agree with these fuckers.
You put words in my mouth.
You're putting words in my mouth.
You hate Jesus.
I don't.
Hey, hey, I like whoever's got the ride to heaven, dude.
All right. So if that means I got to, you know, same.
If I just had a little bit of proof, I'd be all for it.
I just need a little proof.
Exactly.
I'm just lacking a little faith.
It's a faith.
This whole pearly gates thing.
It's the faith.
I don't buy it.
That's a fucking gimmick.
OK, fuck you then.
You're not getting in.
I'll be in fucking heaven having a fucking disco with Jesus while you're fucking in
hell getting fucking poked with a fucking pitchfork.
Have fun.
Have fun, buddy.
Have fun, Casey, especially you, Casey.
You're in a lower level of hell because you're just an asshole.
It's just like you try as hard as you can to believe.
Even if you try as hard as you can to believe something, some people just can't.
I can't. Exactly.
I fucking can't.
Casey, what if you die and then all of a sudden you appear in heaven and they're
like, you just have to say you believe and you can walk through these gates.
Then I fucking haunt Tyler.
You say you believe or do you say, no, this is fake?
I would say I believe and I'm going to go haunt Tyler.
No, but I mean, there would be the possibility that it would just a
hallucination, like a near death hallucination, right?
No, it's not.
You better play it safe.
What?
You better play it safe just in case.
Just in case.
I guess.
I mean, at that point, if I feel like I just died, I feel like I would believe.
The way I see it is that there is no proof of any religions, but there is proof
that we haven't seen any proof of religions, which is why I'm fucking agnostic.
It's just I don't fucking know how I'm going to be a good person while I'm here.
Yeah. Hey, hey, hey, give me a minute.
Listen, can you see air?
Oh, my God.
Can you see air?
What type of fucking argument is that?
No, but no, this is this is the argument that you're giving to me.
Can you see air because of science?
Do you believe it's there?
The science doesn't fit.
Can you see 4G?
Do you believe it's there?
Do you see fucking, you know, space?
But it but those things do things for me.
So does God.
Those things could be proven by science.
No, it's not even the fact that silence science.
I am accepting what is presented to me.
The gas air is presented to me.
If it didn't exist, I won't be able to fucking breathe.
Is any of this real?
I don't fucking know because I'm agnostic.
What do you think of the I don't know what's going on, but I've never I like I said,
I said a million fucking times I was not put onto this planet with a rulebook.
If you gave me one and you said if you check these fucking boxes and you're not
a tool, that fucking takes away free will if you were just given a rulebook.
So what do you mean?
I could still be a fucking psycho if I wanted to.
You know what the rule book is?
It's the Bible.
Well, I got a funny story for you here.
So I was in like ninth grade, right?
In history class.
And my teacher goes, all right, from now on, you guys are going to take notes in a new
way. And he's like, you're going to like write a little symbol next to each line.
And those you take.
And this is going to help you remember stuff better on the test.
And David's and crosses.
So just like the square shapes, whatever.
So like the next week, we're all like, he's like, oh, yeah, by the way,
that all that I told you was like bullshit.
And he's like, why did you believe me about that shit?
He's like, and we're like, because you're our teacher.
He's like, yeah, that's what you guys are like.
Like what exactly what happened with Hitler and killing the six million Jews?
Yeah, that's the same.
Why do we follow what they tell us?
What people tell them to, you know, because you always try.
I've seen enough weird shit in real life
that I can't explain that I think that there's other shit out there.
You're just following the rules of society and like who's above you,
Jesus, because everyone's like, oh, I was just following orders.
But and if the Bible was a rule book
to retort your comment, then why the fuck is there 90 other fucking rule books out
there because they're fucking for losers?
Yeah, good, good fucking defense to that.
I saw half the world doesn't have literally more than half the world does
not follow the Bible. They just they're dumb losers.
Get out of China. They're all Buddhists.
They're dumb. Get out.
Get out of here.
Dumb
about Mexican.
Oh, they're they're good.
Next,
next to the Catholic, they're all right with me.
And what if there's like more than one way to like have faith?
There is more than one way to have faith.
Like what are you trying to say?
Like what if they're all having faith and we don't have to true?
Is that what you're saying?
We don't have to believe everything about the religion that you're subscribed to.
No, you can choose what to do.
I just don't believe in most of it for just about all of them.
Don't worry, guys, I'm too smart for this.
I'm not. That's not the take I'm having.
I don't have anything against people who have faith.
To be honest, I kind of envy it.
It seems like it would be a lot better way to go about your life.
But I can't I can't make myself believe it.
I'm never so sad all the time.
I know it's not like I've accepted it.
I'm not I'm not fucking sad all the time, too.
I'm actually pretty fucking happy with my life.
I went through a period where I wasn't and we're not going into the horror
stories, but actually we got some time.
No, no, no, no, no.
I think this is almost time to fucking end it.
No, no.
Yes, the second wind.
I thought I was suicide.
No, dude, it's fucking it's twelve thirty, man.
That was the buzzer for the war story.
No, it's no.
There's no war stories.
But until I am presented with something
that my brain can fucking perceive as true evidence of a religion,
I'm not going to follow it.
So I just leave it open ended with I'm here.
I don't really know a lot about why I'm here.
But you want to know what?
I feel like being a good person is the right thing to do.
So I'm going to try to do that.
That's where I'm at.
There's no big brain.
I'm fucking smarter than anyone who has religion.
No, it's not that it's me saying like, all right, I don't know.
And I'm not going to pretend like I do.
Listen, I got to know about you.
I got one question for you, man.
I got one. All right, let's go.
If a horse comes in the woods and no one's around to hear it,
does the horse actually come?
Yes, it does.
Is that really what we're going to end on?
Is that really where this episode?
I would like to re-eary my answer.
Yes.
Look, we fucking bombed on this episode, guys.
Just don't fucking keep listening.
We'll get better. I promise.
This was out of control.
We fucking, yeah, this is a bad one.
This is absolutely.
I didn't think I was going to be here.
Dan came in late.
Tyler's angry.
I'll make some editing magic happen.
Yeah, make some editing.
We'll fix it in post.
Fuck it. We'll do it live.
No, we can't do it live.
No.
Never.
We'll never do it this live.
We proved tonight that this could never be a live podcast.
If we ever get canceled, we just need to release the take of everything that we've
cut from episode to episode.
No context either.
Just one clip into the other.
We'll have the one.
Yeah, a bunch of slack, John.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, my God.
All the names of like the places we've worked and just people's like full legal names.
It's like, oh, fuck.
I love it. After we say something like, oh, fuck, we should cut that.
I feel like Casey doesn't do that for like most of it.
But I don't listen to most of the stuff that you say we should cut.
It doesn't even matter.
I mean, we said some stuff that we said we definitely did get caught.
That was for real.
We're going to have the fucking lawyer paramedic on our ass in a couple of years.
Like, what the fuck did you say?
Like, you said my name and where I lived.
You gave the apartment letter.
I'm like a practical joker.
I'm like when they punished, so they put his fucking number on an airplane, flew
it across the beach, they said, I'm so I'm lonely.
Put up his fucking real phone number.
People started calling them like the beach is no place to be lonely.
God damn.
I should do it.
Fucking calling me.
Now I want to pick up.
Break your phone.
I hope not.
I thought you did.
I thought I heard like shit like, oh, I should
use a prank call from Don Juan.
Now, yeah, no place is open right now.
A garage Alaska.
I don't think that's maybe some 24 7 McDonald's.
I don't fucking think so.
I don't know.
The idea of the old AC is
you got to get a shashwan sauce shit shit from the Rick and Morty and shit.
I'm trying to get out of it.
I'll be looking for that.
Most of the places closed at 930 and it's 929.
Yeah.
And it's nice.
I got one minute left.
I could be a pepperoni.
The personal pair piece of the is a loaded says what they used to give me.
Got this stuff.
The
I was just
fucking do that next week.
Well, it's 1230.
I'm going to get pizza open around here.
There's definitely no pizza hut around here.
Fucking call Long John Silver's at one o'clock in the morning.
Yeah, this album is dedicated to all the teachers that told me I'm not welcome.
Our special guests back to the podcast.
He's out on a bond from the nursing home.
Welcome Don Juan.
I love this.
I'm going to check him out.
I don't know how to book with the pictures on my wall.
The
other fucking nurses taking care of you at the fucking nursing home now.
Yeah, they put it in the video game.
The
you get the fucking hot.
Yeah, you get to fucking look at the asshole.
I'm fucking changing your diapers, right?
I'm trying to find a pizza hut.
I'll find clothes.
Zero.
It's California Pizza Kitchen.
I should call it a pizza hut.
I got you.
What about Pizza Hut in Honolulu?
Are they open? Yeah.
Let's do it.
All right, star six seven.
Oh, OK.
Now, I think star six nine is a new one.
Because that's a seven is not a thing anymore.
Star six seven doesn't work anymore.
Fuck.
The personal with Robin Lee and the bottom cheap.
I'm with my feet all day spread.
Now, Mr. Brooklyn Way, the more we got to feed the music out.
I can't I can't.
I never thought it was like I'm always
said, your call may be recorded for quality assurance.
And it will be with you shortly.
Mahalo for calling to the Hawaii.
Try our new national big New Yorker.
Jesus Christ.
I don't know.
Fuck all the pizza here.
Get a large specialty pizza for $16.99 each.
Will you buy two?
Try our pizza.
You press the button yet. I don't think I'm supposed to.
I'm waiting.
No, but this is one hell of a how long have you been on the line for?
Check it out.
Or get a stuff, Chris, large one.
Hopping.
Yeah, stuff, Chris, stuff, Chris.
That's what I'm looking for.
That comes with two medium one.
Happy.
Say hello to the AI.
You're talking to an AI.
Oh, fuck.
That one.
We're calling it a two minutes and 30 seconds.
Please press one.
Wait, it's having you ordered just as a robot.
About your order or recent experience.
Please press three.
Oh, shit.
You would like to replay the specials.
Please press one.
What does that mean?
It means goodbye.
We fucking.
All calls are recorded for quality assurance.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm trying to get at.
Please hold.
The AI can be representatives are assisting other guests.
Your call will be answered in the order.
We're calling pizza hut.
Fuck cheesy crust stuff crust.
You are calling Pizza Hut.
My name is Rochelle.
You're calling.
One is it correct?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm doing.
Damn.
I was wondering if you all still got the personal pizza.
I'd be loving that.
That's my favorite.
Yes, I got that.
You got to get that personal pizza.
You got the triple P.
You got to get that.
And now
may have the location of the.
No, no, I'm trying to know.
I'm young at the personal pair pieces.
Fuckers.
They have the location of the.
Oh, damn.
I don't know. I thought this was pizza.
I was just saying.
I was off.
They have the location of the.
There you are.
You got to get the stuff.
They have the location of the.
Damn, yeah, that's what I'm looking for.
Oh, my God.
Who do?
Yoshi.
What the fuck?
What was she talking about?
She was she wanted the location of the specific pizza hut to see if they.
Have it.
But anyway, we got bone there and you got to cut the number out because they said
yes, my number.
Yes, yes.
Star six seven does not work.
Apparently, star six seven does not work.
Star six nine is the one that works.
Oh, yeah, you know, but I got to get some food.
That was making me hungry.
All right. Actually.
Oh, all right.
Thanks for listening to Untitled Podcast.
Send out your likes on Facebook and send in your tips.
Do we have a Facebook?
Yeah.
I haven't like cast.
Well, you know, we're going to we're going to hit a thousand plays soon.
So like nine hundred eighty something.
Damn, we should celebrate.
Let's celebrate.
Who the fuck is still listening to this?
Do probably a lot of people in psych awards.
They're like, we understand this.
Hey, listen, I know so many people in my life that are like, I heard on this one
podcast, I'm like, oh, wow, I'm going to believe this person.
But now I know that podcasts like ours exist.
Yeah, maybe you should.
You should have listened.
But hey, as always,
here is a theory, but I believe it.
Listen, as always, thank you for watching or listening or doing anything.
Thanks for being here. Also, of course, come back.
Oh, no, no.
Be kind to yourselves and each other.
We are.
They are Tyler here.
Thanks for listening to Untitled Podcast.
And if you made it this far, I would recommend a full body MRI scan.
We'll see you next week after we get canceled.
And as always, be kind to yourselves and each other.
For all we know, robots have souls.
We just don't know if they do or don't.
How do you know?
Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot?
You think we were the first ones to inhabit this planet?
Fuck no.
No, no, we are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole.
Yes, we are.
There's people out there with some really dumb thoughts.
Extended episodes.
Where the fuck did the Siermans come from?
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?
They're killing all already born babies and sell them to the Chinese.
Aliens exist.
Somewhere in China, right?
In some days, what the fuck?
There are super soldiers that are at least nine or ten feet tall.
Anthropoclesatrum, they have dread.
The super soldiers.
Then they are extraterrestrials.
They are aliens.
I do not know if they are real or not.
Before my eyes, while holding their pulse,
you feel them die of this virus.
You feel bump, bump, bump, beep, nothing.
They're fucking gone.
I've seen it happen.
I think that the government has taken it to the next level with the birds.
They know what birds are going to cross paths with you that you are going to be
able to raise and they are going to make them so fucking real.
They're going to sink money into that.
Because they know that if you put that
motherfucker in a cage, they're going to be able to convince you that they can fucking real.
You can cut it open.
You're going to see blood guts.
No circuitry.
But let me tell you, their technology is absolutely vile.
Which, by the way, Big Brother is the overlord.
We're only living in the third dimension.
George Soros is an actual Nazi collaborator.
Okay, I'm not fucking lying.
It's fucking real.
Okay, look it up.
Look it up.
He says that he was doing this shit.
George Soros actually worked with the fucking Nazis during the Holocaust.
He says that he was doing it just to survive, but he fucking loved it.
He was having a great fucking time doing this shit.
George Soros is the fucking devil.
Okay, he's not fucking doing this shit.
George Soros is fucking evil.
He's the actual fucking leader for all this shit.
He's fucking put down a whole bunch of shit.
Just don't fucking get it, okay?
Everybody likes Donald Trump.
The fucking word person out there.
Trump, right?
Trump.
He's not the actual fucking leader.
It's George Soros.
It's Bill Gates.
It's fucking Elon Musk.
It's everyone out there.
Everybody says.
Everybody.
Everybody says, Elon Musk is so evil.
He's playing for the people.
The actual government.
He's trying.
The actual new government, which is George Soros and all the fucking
Nazis, are actually the ones that are in the fucking Holocaust.
The mere politicians are paid off by the fucking billionaires.
Fucking