1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,040
For all we know robots have souls, we just don't know if they do or don't.

2
00:00:08,040 --> 00:00:10,080
How do you know?

3
00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:13,760
Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot?

4
00:00:13,760 --> 00:00:19,240
Do you think we were the first ones to inhabit this planet?

5
00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:20,240
Fuck no.

6
00:00:20,240 --> 00:00:25,360
No, no, we are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole.

7
00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:26,880
Yes, we are.

8
00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:30,800
There's people out there with some really dumb thoughts.

9
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:31,800
Extended episode.

10
00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:34,800
Where the fuck did the pyramids come from?

11
00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:36,800
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?

12
00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,800
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?

13
00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:44,800
They're killing all the already born babies and selling them to the Chinese.

14
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:46,800
Aliens exist as we speak.

15
00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:53,800
Somewhere in China, in some base, there are super soldiers that are at least 9 or 10 feet

16
00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:54,800
tall.

17
00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:59,800
If they come from our planet, then they are extraterrestrials.

18
00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:02,800
They are aliens.

19
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:05,800
I do not negotiate with terrorists.

20
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:08,800
I do not listen to this.

21
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:09,800
Who do you think, Marky?

22
00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:25,800
It's the fucking Libyan!

23
00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:40,800
It's got a nice jazzy beat to it.

24
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:43,800
Hello!

25
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:45,800
Welcome!

26
00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:47,800
Episode 10?

27
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:49,800
Episode 10.

28
00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:51,800
Episode 10, baby.

29
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:52,800
Welcome.

30
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:55,800
We've got a lot of shit to talk about.

31
00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:57,800
Our new title podcast.

32
00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,800
This will be fun.

33
00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:02,800
All right.

34
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:06,800
So Casey, how are you doing on this fine week?

35
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:08,800
Just great, brother.

36
00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:10,800
That's good to hear.

37
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:12,800
I am zoinked, brother.

38
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:13,800
Yeah, I can tell.

39
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:14,800
Yeah.

40
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:15,800
As always.

41
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:25,800
So on the topic of last week, Kanye, whether the wax museum, I saw that on the

42
00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:30,800
practical jokers, Madam to so yeah, man to so is wax museum.

43
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:37,800
So so Madam to so wax museum took out Kanye West for anti-semitic remarks, but

44
00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:39,800
there's a big but to that.

45
00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:46,800
They left a certain someone who was born April 20th and was an Austrian painter who

46
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:48,800
is also known for some other hit list.

47
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:49,800
Birthday was four twenty.

48
00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:51,800
Blaze it up, brother.

49
00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:55,800
Yeah, it was a it was a man by the name of Adolf Hitler.

50
00:02:55,800 --> 00:03:00,800
He's still in the museum, but they took out Kanye for anti-semitic remarks.

51
00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,800
He was a historical figure.

52
00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:04,800
So is Kanye.

53
00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:10,800
You don't think that in the future people will look back on Kanye be like, I think

54
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:16,800
Kanye is arguably more influential than Hitler in terms of history.

55
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:19,800
You think I think so.

56
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:24,800
I mean, easy or ye was what's his name now?

57
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,800
I think it's ye or ye ye ye.

58
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:30,800
What are you looking up?

59
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:34,800
You know, just looking at my ring camera.

60
00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:43,800
Anyways, so yeah, Kanye West, you think he's going to be more influential than Hitler?

61
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:49,800
Yeah, I mean, did Hitler get a hundred million Spotify's place?

62
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:51,800
Let's be real.

63
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:53,800
They get a hundred million Spotify place.

64
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,800
I mean, Kanye might be president someday.

65
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:58,800
I'm going to vote for him in twenty four.

66
00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:01,800
I'm going to vote for Alex Jones.

67
00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:06,800
Well, he ran last last time he ran to Alex.

68
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:13,800
Yeah, or Kanye, a Kanye Kanye ran for president in twenty twenty.

69
00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:14,800
I think he did.

70
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,800
Yeah, but then he dropped out.

71
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,800
Yeah, and like the celebrities like it's not a joke.

72
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:22,800
We got a vote Trump out of office fucking there.

73
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,800
Well, he runs a he ran as a Republican, right?

74
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:26,800
Yeah.

75
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:31,800
Oh my God, he considered himself a Maga Republican.

76
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:36,800
So I kill things that we can talk about today.

77
00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:41,800
Dan said he's coming, so we'll have our we'll have our third guest and Ali Mack.

78
00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:51,800
Once again, flake central flake city USA, Ali Mac, Ali Mac, Ali Mac.

79
00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:55,800
I'm going to shit on every time he doesn't come until he fucking shows up to

80
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:58,800
himself and dude, we're going to make him drink his own cum.

81
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,800
Oh, yeah, brother.

82
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,800
Only fans exclusive Jesus.

83
00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:11,800
So what the fuck was I going to talk about?

84
00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:14,800
You were going to talk about fucking motherfucking.

85
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:16,800
Oh, you talk about Kanye.

86
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:17,800
I talk about Kanye.

87
00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:22,800
Yeah, I want to talk about American Satan, but I think that's a really fun one

88
00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:26,800
for Dan to be here for because the story and plot line to that movie is fucking

89
00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:28,800
batshit insane.

90
00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:31,800
Like I'm not going to spoil it.

91
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:32,800
Is it a new movie?

92
00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:34,800
I think it was like twenty nineteen or something.

93
00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,800
Twenty twenty seventeen, twenty eighteen.

94
00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:37,800
We're in that area.

95
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:38,800
Never heard of it.

96
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:43,800
Yeah, it's got the lead singer of Black Veil Brides, Andy Beerbeck or something.

97
00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:45,800
We should talk about our favorite horror movies.

98
00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:46,800
Favorite horror movies.

99
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,800
I mean, what's American Satan?

100
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:49,800
Is it a horror movie?

101
00:05:49,800 --> 00:06:00,800
No, it's it's like a like a retelling of Devil in Down in Georgia, I guess.

102
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:04,800
Maybe it's like he's like drama.

103
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:05,800
It's a drama.

104
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:06,800
Yeah, it's like a drama.

105
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,800
It's like a band drama with demons and shit.

106
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,800
It's fucking weird.

107
00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:15,800
But my favorite horror movie, I would have to say it's the Friday the 13th series.

108
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:19,800
I really like the Jason Voorhees like shit.

109
00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:26,800
He just I just like when you think of Jason Voorhees, like he's just an unstoppable fucking

110
00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:27,800
juggernaut.

111
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:28,800
Like it's ridiculous.

112
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,800
Like you can't fucking stop the motherfucker.

113
00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:36,800
Like he's like a zombie ghost demon man with a machete with a hockey mask.

114
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:39,800
Yeah, he's fucking out there, man.

115
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:41,800
Bro, what Freddie gets in your fucking dreams.

116
00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:43,800
Freddie gets in your wet dreams, man.

117
00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,800
You can't stop someone else getting your dreams.

118
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:48,800
You can't you can't stop going to sleep.

119
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,800
Yeah, maybe, maybe not.

120
00:06:50,800 --> 00:06:51,800
I don't know.

121
00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:52,800
Jason versus Freddie.

122
00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,800
I think Freddie would win.

123
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,800
They already did that retard.

124
00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:57,800
Who won?

125
00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:58,800
I didn't even see it.

126
00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:04,800
Jason won, but Freddie like got like the last laugh, I guess.

127
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:08,800
Because like he was alive at the end sort of.

128
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:14,800
Well, Jason versus Freddie versus Michael Myers, because you can't kill Michael.

129
00:07:14,800 --> 00:07:16,800
Comes back to life all the time.

130
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:23,800
I mean, yeah, but Michael Myers and Jason are kind of like the same vein, but Jason's

131
00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:25,800
more like scary.

132
00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:27,800
He's a lot bigger.

133
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,800
I like like psychological horror movies.

134
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:35,800
Do you ever see House on Haunted Hill?

135
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:36,800
Is that an old one?

136
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:40,800
I mean, there's a remake in the 90s and there's one from like the 60s, I think.

137
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,800
No, I didn't see that.

138
00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:43,800
It's good.

139
00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:44,800
I like it.

140
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:45,800
It's enjoyable.

141
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,800
I heard that was a disturbing one.

142
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,800
It's a fucking movie.

143
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:54,800
I've gone on a kick of watching like the trying to watch the most disturbing movies of all

144
00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:55,800
time.

145
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,800
Well, I got a disturbing one for you.

146
00:07:58,800 --> 00:07:59,800
It's not really a horror movie.

147
00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:00,800
It's just awful.

148
00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:01,800
What?

149
00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:07,800
It's a Holocaust like documentary called Through Wind and Fog or Rain and Fog.

150
00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:12,800
It shows you like the aftermath of the camps and like them trying to bury the bodies and

151
00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:13,800
shit.

152
00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:14,800
It's real fucked up.

153
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:15,800
I remember we had to watch shit like that in high school.

154
00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:16,800
Yeah.

155
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:19,800
And then you're like, well, you're not a Holocaust denier now.

156
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:23,800
Why are my teachers showing me snuff films?

157
00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:26,800
I'm 13.

158
00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:29,800
Speaking of weird shit when you're 13.

159
00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,800
All right today.

160
00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:32,800
All right class.

161
00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:35,800
They were going to watch Nazi shoveling bodies in the pits.

162
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:43,800
And then I when I was fucking in sixth grade, they made us watch the diary of Anne Frank.

163
00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:48,800
And when I was 12 years old or what, how old are you in sixth grade?

164
00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:49,800
Eleven?

165
00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:50,800
Yeah, I 12 maybe.

166
00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:53,800
But I watched that too in the same year.

167
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:57,800
But I really I thought Anne Frank, whoever played her was really fucking hot.

168
00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:00,800
And I like threw the whole movie off for me.

169
00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,800
Did you tell that story on the podcast yet?

170
00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:09,800
Because I feel like that was a story where you like you got your first erection to Anne

171
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:10,800
Frank.

172
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:11,800
Maybe that was a story on Reddit actually.

173
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:12,800
No, that was me.

174
00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:13,800
That was you.

175
00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:14,800
Yeah.

176
00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:15,800
Yeah.

177
00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:21,800
So I had to watch the diary of Anne Frank when I was 11 years old in school.

178
00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:28,800
And so like, you know, it goes to like the movie and like you get like attached to Anne

179
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:32,800
and she's like, you know, in hiding from the Nazis and shit.

180
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:37,800
And like she like talks about having her first period, which is really weird.

181
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,800
But like Jesus, I was like, we were watching that.

182
00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:45,800
And at one point, this is this is what really fucks me up now.

183
00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:51,800
Like like they shaved their heads and like they were like naked when they're shaving

184
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:52,800
their heads.

185
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:57,800
And like for whatever reason, my 11 year old brain was like, that shit's fucking hot.

186
00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:03,800
I was like, so that like left a mental image in my brain that like shaved head.

187
00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:04,800
Women are fucking hot.

188
00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:07,800
And I'm like, that came from Anne Frank.

189
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:09,800
I'm like, that's real fucked up.

190
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,800
You're one fucked motherfucker.

191
00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:17,800
I got fucking how that movie was fucking how old now, like 90s, I think, or something.

192
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:18,800
The Diary of Anne Frank.

193
00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:24,800
Yeah, it was like I watched that in like eighth grade.

194
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:25,800
Oh, look it up.

195
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:31,800
I'm looking up right now, too.

196
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:33,800
Movie.

197
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,800
1959.

198
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:38,800
Yeah, but there's like a newer movie, I think.

199
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:41,800
2009.

200
00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:46,800
I think it was before that might be the 2001.

201
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:49,800
Maybe.

202
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:53,800
Trying to see which one it was.

203
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,800
Like it was.

204
00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:59,800
It was a it was a bad time.

205
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:01,800
It was a bad time in your life.

206
00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:04,800
I mean, the Holocaust was a was a bad, bad time.

207
00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:09,800
I thought she meant fucking getting hot and bothered by Anne Frank.

208
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:14,800
I mean, that's a bad time, too.

209
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,800
Was it a TV series?

210
00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:18,800
It might have been like the TV series.

211
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:19,800
Yeah.

212
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:23,800
And then I watched in a probably ninth grade.

213
00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,800
I watched Hotel Rwanda.

214
00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:27,800
Oh, yeah, I watched that, too.

215
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:34,800
I watched so many fucked up movies we had to watch in fucking, you know, in middle school.

216
00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:39,800
I watched Gone with the Wind, which is kind of violent.

217
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:46,800
I mean, it has like Nazis in it, like in shit like it's kind of fucked up.

218
00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:50,800
Like, you know, why are they showing all this Nazi shit to us?

219
00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,800
We're fucking like Ted.

220
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:53,800
I guess so.

221
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,800
We don't turn out to be like Nazis.

222
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,800
But at the end, stop a lot of people.

223
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:06,800
Yeah, I was going to say some people still grow up to be extremists.

224
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,800
Oh, was it this one?

225
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:10,800
It might have been this one.

226
00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:11,800
I don't know.

227
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:15,800
He's like desperately trying to find it again.

228
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:20,800
I'm trying to figure out what fucking it was.

229
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,800
It was weird, man.

230
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:24,800
It was it was fucking weird.

231
00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:25,800
It was weird.

232
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,800
Well, now you've shared it with the world.

233
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:34,800
Yeah, yeah, you're sitting over there with the fucking baseball cap and a hood on and

234
00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:39,800
earphones looking like the real fucking Slim Shady over there.

235
00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:43,800
So yeah, and Frank was my first boner.

236
00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:48,800
So that's a real, real fucking head turner.

237
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:51,800
I guess I got my first.

238
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:52,800
I don't want to say it.

239
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:55,800
I said it about and Frank, my guy.

240
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:56,800
Okay, I was playing.

241
00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:59,800
I was playing Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, the video game.

242
00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:01,800
Oh, and Hermione.

243
00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,800
No, it just just just out of nowhere.

244
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:04,800
Really?

245
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,800
Yeah, yeah, like I thought that.

246
00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:11,800
Yeah, that was that was a problem.

247
00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:14,800
And then I'm like, I don't know what the fuck's going on.

248
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,800
Why is this fucking going up right now?

249
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:18,800
Like this is weird.

250
00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:23,800
And then I have a fucking fetish for girls with shaved heads for the rest of my life.

251
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:30,800
So, you know, there's that yeah, it's a problem.

252
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:38,800
Yeah, but the horror movies and Frank, I like like so psychological horror movies

253
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,800
like ever see the movie here.

254
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:41,800
Red to Terry.

255
00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:44,800
Yeah, that movie sucks.

256
00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:45,800
It's fucked up man.

257
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:51,800
The first time I watch it, I got like a really bad feeling, a very, very down feeling.

258
00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:52,800
You know what I mean?

259
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:58,800
Bro, you know what you can do then or midsummer to turn off the fucking TV.

260
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:00,800
You don't have to watch it.

261
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:02,800
Why do you think it sucks?

262
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:05,800
Well, maybe that's why you think it sucks because you got the same feeling.

263
00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:06,800
No, I just don't care.

264
00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:07,800
You don't care.

265
00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:09,800
Dude, I've watched fucking people getting.

266
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:14,800
I watched like ISIS like fucking sniping videos when I was fucking like, you know, 10.

267
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:19,800
Yeah, you were usually you said you were going to talk about how you're getting ads for.

268
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,800
Oh, that's what I want to talk about.

269
00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:26,800
Dude, it's that's another thing that I want Dan to be here for because he I think he'd have some interesting shit.

270
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:31,800
Dude, let's just let's just bullshit till Dan gets here.

271
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:37,800
Dude, that's another fucking weird thing that like turns you on when you're a kid.

272
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,800
Fucking Raven from Teen Titans.

273
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:44,800
That was one of them fucking.

274
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,800
What's the fuck her name?

275
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:52,800
Sam from Sam from Danny Phantom, the goth girl.

276
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:53,800
Oh, yeah.

277
00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:56,800
Gwen from Total Drama Island, the goth girl.

278
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:58,800
You're seeing a pattern here, aren't you?

279
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,800
Thorn from the Hex Girls and Scooby Doo, the goth girl.

280
00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:04,800
You seen a pattern here, guys?

281
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:06,800
Are you seeing a fucking pattern here?

282
00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:07,800
We get it.

283
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:08,800
You like girls.

284
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:12,800
Yeah, because fucking TV told me to.

285
00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:18,800
Do you think that media has that much of an influence on the rest of your life?

286
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:21,800
Let's be fucking real.

287
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:30,800
If you look at Boomers, they had a whole bunch of like redheaded, like ditzy bitches is like their like childhood crushes like Daphne.

288
00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:34,800
And what the fuck is the way from the Jetsons name?

289
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:35,800
Fucking whatever.

290
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:36,800
Joan Jetson, I think.

291
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:42,800
Like they have like all like these redheaded, like blonde ditzy redheaded, like ditzy fuckers.

292
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:48,800
And that's like that became like the like the archetype that like these men wanted.

293
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,800
Like Marilyn Monroe.

294
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:55,800
And then like then like in the 80s, it was like the like cheerleader type.

295
00:15:55,800 --> 00:16:02,800
And then now it's fucking goth girls because we fucking had a whole bunch of goth girls in our fucking shit.

296
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:10,800
I think it's a it is a it's a fucking thing that like subconsciously like implants fucking things into your head that like you like it when you're older type shit.

297
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:13,800
Yeah, like it's a fucking weird man.

298
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:19,800
Like that's why you get a bar every time you watch World War Two document.

299
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:25,800
I got stuck.

300
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,800
What the fuck man, right now?

301
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:28,800
I don't know.

302
00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:33,800
I think that's why I feel strange every time I watch Harry Potter in the chambers.

303
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:41,800
Yeah, Emma Watson turned out to be a fucking babe.

304
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:56,800
Yeah, yeah, why the fuck did her mining end up with Ron like Ron was an ugly fucking back and Harry Potter was like, you know, like the hero of the world.

305
00:16:56,800 --> 00:17:01,800
And she's like now I'm going to fuck the fucking weirdo because Harry wanted to fuck Jenny.

306
00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:05,800
Yeah, which he shouldn't have fucking Hermione was right there.

307
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:11,800
Yeah, well, Harry fucking friend zone Hermione because he's fucking autistic.

308
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:16,800
I don't want to fuck the hot what I want to do the Harry Potter.

309
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:22,800
I watched them and I just rewatch them and because my girlfriend wanted me to.

310
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:24,800
It's an interesting watch.

311
00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:28,800
I guess it's fucking yeah, I've seen all the movies about twenty times.

312
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:36,800
I've seen the Gobble of Fire more times than anything because it was always on Harry Potter weekend on family ABC family.

313
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:40,800
I also read the books about five times the books are annoying.

314
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,800
They're too much fucking shit.

315
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:50,800
Isn't like in the books Harry Potter's like eyes like green and like it's like a big deal that his eyes are green and then like the fucking movies that he's just fucking out blue eyes.

316
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:53,800
I never knows really the color of his eyes.

317
00:17:53,800 --> 00:18:00,800
Have you ever seen a picture of Daniel Radcliffe like holding two guns and screaming in the street?

318
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:02,800
No, yeah, you got to see this picture.

319
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:08,800
This could be this could be a picture of that in I.

320
00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:13,800
Oh rad cliff guns.

321
00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:20,800
I mean, I suppose they couldn't go out of their way to find someone with green eyes that match the description of the character.

322
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:27,800
Yeah, like look at this fucking deranged picture that they have.

323
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:30,800
That's a lovely picture for a movie.

324
00:18:30,800 --> 00:18:32,800
Yeah, I think so.

325
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:39,800
I think it'd be a fucking that would be a fun like picture to have is like the logo for this episode.

326
00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:47,800
Unless we come over something cooler, but apparently it was from a movie like called Guns of Kimbo, which was an interesting movie.

327
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,800
I don't know. Did you ever see Guns of Kimbo?

328
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:53,800
It's got Harry Potter in it and like oh did you ever do?

329
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:58,800
Did we talk about this in the podcast where fucking Daniel Radcliffe stopped the mugging the other day?

330
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:01,800
I don't know. I heard that story though dude.

331
00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:13,800
It's fucking wild like this lady was getting mugged and then like fucking Daniel Radcliffe comes out from the fucking alleyways like fucking like a superhero or some shit.

332
00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:21,800
He's fucking expeliarmus the shit out of his hand and then like I saw the meme where it's just like oh who's gonna fucking save you Harry Potter?

333
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:28,800
He goes you're goddamn right and he comes out of the darkness and goes like expeliarmus!

334
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:33,800
I'd shit myself and Harry Potter saved my life.

335
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:40,800
Harry Potter, I think fucking Harry Potter gave her money or some shit too afterwards like yeah I'm sorry you had to go through that.

336
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:43,800
That was nice of him.

337
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:47,800
So who's the better teenage heartthrob of the early 2000's?

338
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:52,800
Fucking Daniel Radcliffe or fucking Robert Pattinson?

339
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:54,800
Who do you think is a better looking fellow?

340
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:55,800
Robert Pattinson.

341
00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:59,800
Absolutely yeah. If you don't take Robert Pattinson you're a fucking retard.

342
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,800
Damn it!

343
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,800
Fuck!

344
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:04,800
We have to bleep that shit.

345
00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:07,800
Oh you don't have to bleep that shit. You can say the R word.

346
00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:09,800
I'm not gonna get cancelled.

347
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:11,800
We already cancelled so we already had the cancel episode.

348
00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:12,800
We already had the cancel episode.

349
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,800
So at this point no one's listening.

350
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,800
We got a fucking shadow band.

351
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,800
No we have currently zero listeners.

352
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:26,800
Oh we could uh, that's another topic for Dan to be here. Fucking Twitter.

353
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:30,800
He seems like he'd have some strong opinions on that.

354
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:35,800
Nicholas Cruz was sentenced to life in prison.

355
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:39,800
At like a super max or like general pop or like...

356
00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:43,800
Oh I don't know. He was just sentenced to life in prison without parole.

357
00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,800
They turned down the death penalty.

358
00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:48,800
Why did they turn down the death penalty?

359
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:54,800
Because one juror I think, yeah I think one juror, it wasn't unanimous, one juror voted against it.

360
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:58,800
Fuck you! Fuck you!

361
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:02,800
We should have killed that motherfucker. Firing squad that ass.

362
00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:08,800
I don't, I think that there's something wrong with the justice system the way it is with that.

363
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:09,800
What are you talking about?

364
00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:14,800
I don't know. We're gonna have a, we're gonna have to pause it though because my charger isn't working.

365
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:15,800
Your charger?

366
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:17,800
Yeah, my computer's not charging.

367
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:18,800
Oh.

368
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:19,800
So hold on.

369
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,800
Alright, we're back.

370
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:25,800
We are back motherfuckers.

371
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,800
Motherfuckers.

372
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:33,800
Alright, what were we talking about?

373
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:35,800
Oh Nicholas Cruz got fucking...

374
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,800
No, I thought we talked about something else before that or after that.

375
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:39,800
No.

376
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,800
I thought we talked about something else before that or after that.

377
00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:43,800
No.

378
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:50,800
But he got the fucking, not the death penalty, which is stupid.

379
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:56,800
There was a video of like him and his lawyers like laughing during the sentencing, which is fucked up.

380
00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:59,800
Fuck that guy. He should have been fucking executed.

381
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:00,800
Yeah.

382
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,800
They're not gonna put him in general pot because he'll get killed.

383
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:07,800
Oh, all the more reason to put him in general pot.

384
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:13,800
I mean, yeah, but they're not gonna because it's gonna be unsafe for him.

385
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:17,800
Motherfucker should either be dead or in a fucking hole for the rest of his life where they just fucking piss on him.

386
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:22,800
Like, like if you wanted to, you could just go over and just piss on him.

387
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,800
I think that'd be a pretty sick punishment.

388
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:27,800
Like five bucks to piss on Nicholas Cruz.

389
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:30,800
Like five bucks to pick up Nicholas Cage.

390
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,800
Or Nicholas whatever.

391
00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:37,800
Nick Cage. Nick Cage. Put Nick Cage in the hole too.

392
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,800
Dude, Nick Cage would eat him.

393
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:43,800
Nicholas Cage like, oh yeah, I'm gonna eat you.

394
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,800
Fucking some wild shit like that.

395
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:47,800
Yeah.

396
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:48,800
Fuck man.

397
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:49,800
Fuck.

398
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:58,800
I've been watching, I've been watching a lot of the, the Disney or like the old Netflix, the Disney movies.

399
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:03,800
A lot of the Disney or like the old Netflix Marvel shows.

400
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:05,800
Like Daredevil and shit.

401
00:23:05,800 --> 00:23:07,800
It's fucking solid actually.

402
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:10,800
Not into superhero movies.

403
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:12,800
I mean, it's pretty fucking good.

404
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:18,800
I like, I like Daredevil a lot, but it's because I'm a Catholic and he's a Catholic superhero.

405
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:19,800
What?

406
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:21,800
Yeah, he's a Catholic.

407
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:25,800
He's like, I will save you with the power of God.

408
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:27,800
No, he's not like, he's not like that.

409
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:30,800
He's more like a superhero that is also a Catholic.

410
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:37,800
The power of Christ compels you and like he uses like the devil costume because like it strikes fear into like the hearts of evil.

411
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:38,800
Yeah.

412
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:40,800
What the fuck?

413
00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,800
The Monte Hall problem.

414
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:44,800
It's still up here.

415
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:52,800
God, let me see news of the day.

416
00:23:52,800 --> 00:24:00,800
The day US News Daily breaking news kill your family.

417
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:09,800
Three presidents descend on Pennsylvania and the major day of one of the nation's most closely lots Senate races.

418
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:12,800
I don't care about.

419
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,800
Oh, it's election day next this Tuesday.

420
00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:16,800
Go out and vote Republican.

421
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:18,800
Please don't.

422
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:22,800
Are you going to vote for Zeldin?

423
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:23,800
Absolutely.

424
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,800
I'm voting for Zeldin Zeldin versus Hokel.

425
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,800
Hokel is a fucking piece of shit, and even you can agree with that.

426
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:31,800
Oh yeah, absolutely.

427
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,800
What's your stance on gun control?

428
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:38,800
I think that guns that we don't have any control over guns.

429
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:41,800
You know what I'm saying?

430
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:43,800
Like we don't control guns.

431
00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:44,800
They control us.

432
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:45,800
Are you fucking kidding me?

433
00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:51,800
No, like if you put a gun on the table, could it shoot you?

434
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:55,800
If I put a gun on the table, it could absolutely shoot me.

435
00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:56,800
It could miss fire.

436
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:57,800
Are you fucking kidding me?

437
00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:59,800
Go ahead, gun shoot.

438
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,800
What if it misfires?

439
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:03,800
That's not the point.

440
00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:04,800
That's not the point of good.

441
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:06,800
That is the fucking point of gun control.

442
00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:11,800
The point of gun control is to keep the guns out of the hands of Americans that deserve it.

443
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:14,800
It's in our fucking Constitution, the Second Amendment.

444
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,800
And guess what it says at the very bottom of the Second Amendment?

445
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:20,800
It shall not be infringed.

446
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:27,800
You commie motherfuckers are trying to take our guns away because you fucking hate America and you hate freedom.

447
00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:28,800
The only reason why...

448
00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:29,800
Shut the fuck up.

449
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:30,800
Let me finish.

450
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:31,800
Let me finish.

451
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:32,800
Let me fucking finish.

452
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:34,800
Let me finish.

453
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:36,800
Let me finish.

454
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:45,800
So the reason why our founding fathers have guns in our Constitution is not because for hunting or for other things like that.

455
00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:55,800
The reason why we have the Second Amendment is because of a tyrannical government has to be able to be taken down by its own citizens.

456
00:25:55,800 --> 00:26:00,800
The blood of the Tree of Liberty must be watered with the blood of tyrants.

457
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:11,800
And that basically is saying shoot your fucking governors and shoot your presidents in Minecraft if they fucking become corrupt or fucking evil pieces of shit.

458
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:13,800
Oh my God.

459
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:28,800
Yeah, but since since I've the whole freedom of speech thing and you know how much I agree with the First Amendment, it kind of applies to the Second Amendment to it shall not be infringed.

460
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:37,800
Yes, but but what but common sense gun laws fuck you.

461
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:40,800
We shouldn't have common sense gun laws.

462
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,800
If I should, if I can own a tank, I should be able to own a tank.

463
00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:47,800
You know, try to do stuff to prevent mass shootings.

464
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:52,800
Then we kind of have to make laws that dude.

465
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:55,800
If it wasn't guns, it would be fucking swords.

466
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:57,800
If it wasn't swords and be now.

467
00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:02,800
Are you going to take away hammers because you see that whole thing with Nancy shut the shut up a hammer shut up.

468
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:08,800
Did you see that fucking Nancy Pelosi's husband has been beaten down with a fucking hammer?

469
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:09,800
Are we going to ban hammers?

470
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:17,800
Are we going to ban hammers with with handles that are run right from people with hammers, but like no, you can't run away from people with hammers.

471
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:19,800
If you're seventy five years old,

472
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:21,800
Jesus Christ,

473
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:32,800
dude, if if Paul Pelosi had a gun, that guy would not have been able to fucking kill him or or brutally destroy his skull and give him brain damage.

474
00:27:32,800 --> 00:27:40,800
Bro, I believe in the right to bear arms, but I also believe in the right to limit gun control.

475
00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:43,800
I mean limit the limit, limiting gun control.

476
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,800
I think that there should be no gun control.

477
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:52,800
I think we should not not limit the limitation that is gun control.

478
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:53,800
They're talking in circles there.

479
00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:55,800
You just agreed with me there.

480
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:58,800
You literally just said that there shouldn't be gun control with that sent.

481
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:01,800
I think that there should be guns, but they should be controlled.

482
00:28:01,800 --> 00:28:05,800
How do you control a gun retard by not shooting it?

483
00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:15,800
So are you going to put fucking taxes on bullets, not selling it to mentally ill people or really anyone be considered mentally ill.

484
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:17,800
I would be considered mentally ill.

485
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:24,800
I think everyone could own like should be able to only one pistol, but I don't think people should be able to own assault rifles.

486
00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,800
So here's my ideal world.

487
00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:29,800
Okay, everybody has a pistol on their side at all times.

488
00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,800
A armed society is a polite society.

489
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:37,800
If you look at me like the hood, yeah, oh yeah, that'd be great.

490
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:43,800
So listen, listen, if you are for them, right, you look at the actual to s the statistics.

491
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:54,800
If you look at the actual statistics, the the the in Texas, let's say the difference between Texas and New York.

492
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:55,800
What is the crime rate in New York?

493
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:56,800
Very high.

494
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:58,800
You've seen the crime rate in New York, right?

495
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:01,800
What's the gun crime rate in New York?

496
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:03,800
Extremely high.

497
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:05,800
What is the gun crime rate in Texas?

498
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:09,800
Very limited, actually, because everybody has a gun.

499
00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:13,800
Well, it puts everybody on an equal playing field if everybody has a gun.

500
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:17,800
Nobody's more powerful than the other person because everybody has a fucking gun on them.

501
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:20,800
Yeah, like I said, it works for them in the hood, right?

502
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:23,800
Everybody God made man cult made him equal.

503
00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:29,800
Where do all the crimes happen and everybody has a gun in the hood and all the crimes happen?

504
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:43,800
What's up bro, but if you have if everyone had a gun, yes, people would be less likely to commit crimes,

505
00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:50,800
but also everybody would have a gun in and when something escalated, it wouldn't just escalate into like a fight.

506
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:51,800
People would be shooting each other.

507
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:54,800
I think to consenting adults to be able to do all the death.

508
00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:57,800
Well, that's a real thing.

509
00:29:57,800 --> 00:29:59,800
I believe that's a real thing.

510
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:00,800
I believe I'm not joking.

511
00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:06,800
I think that two consenting adults should be able to go out into a street, have one bullet.

512
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:09,800
They make sure that there's only one bullet in the chamber.

513
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,800
They show each other their magazines emptied out besides one bullet.

514
00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:18,800
You rack your bullet and you walk five paces from each other and just shoot the fuck out of each other.

515
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:22,800
I think that whoever wins wins the argument.

516
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:30,800
I also think that fist fighting between two grown adults should be completely legal if you both agree on it.

517
00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:34,800
Oh, to an extent is like no, it's not.

518
00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:44,800
If you fucking agree to fist fight somebody in the street and the clubs, no, no, we're talking about like this guy is really dissing you right now.

519
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:46,800
And he's like dissing your home girl.

520
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,800
And you're like, yo, let's step outside.

521
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:50,800
We'll fucking fight this shit out.

522
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,800
And then we'll leave. It's legal to do to do boxing.

523
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:55,800
We're not talking about that.

524
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:58,800
We're talking about actual situations where you're like, hey, what's the difference?

525
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:00,800
What's the difference?

526
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:02,800
You're both punching each other and consenting to it.

527
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:05,800
Casey, have you ever boxed?

528
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,800
What's the difference?

529
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:09,800
Boxing is a sport.

530
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,800
So I boxed for thirteen years.

531
00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:16,800
Casey, there's a big difference between boxing and fighting, and I've been in a lot of street fights.

532
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:19,800
There's a big difference between boxing and fighting.

533
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:25,800
I'm just saying it's two consenting adults and they should be able to beat the shit out of each other.

534
00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:33,800
If they want to hey, listen, if two consenting adults can jerk each other off in a fucking restroom, I should be able to fight a guy in the street.

535
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:44,800
If the other guy can sense equal rights for fighters, yeah, but it's like I would equal rights for equal fights.

536
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:49,800
Vote for Tyler Lee. I was in a mosh pit yesterday.

537
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:57,800
That's like, you know, consensual yeah fighting everybody there smells terrible.

538
00:31:57,800 --> 00:31:59,800
Yeah, it's a mosh pit.

539
00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:06,800
God damn, God damn, so all right.

540
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:10,800
What else you got news of the day?

541
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:14,800
Kentucky politics distilled who cares about Kentucky?

542
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:15,800
Not me.

543
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:20,800
Donald Trump might be announcing his presidency run again.

544
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:21,800
No shit.

545
00:32:21,800 --> 00:32:26,800
Oh, but the the election who you voting for Lee's Eldon.

546
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:27,800
Fuck that.

547
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:28,800
Fuck that guy.

548
00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:30,800
I hate fucking voting for Hoechel.

549
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:32,800
No vote for Zeldin.

550
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,800
He needs every vote you can get.

551
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,800
There literally is no option for like third party candidates.

552
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:44,800
There's only options for right ends Biden on the people calling him a socialist.

553
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:46,800
Give me a break.

554
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:49,800
What idiots I quote Joe Biden.

555
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:50,800
Give me a break.

556
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:57,800
What idiots sleepy Joe who falls off a bike when he's fucking riding it in the fucking street.

557
00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:01,800
You see the video of Biden just like shaking no one's hand.

558
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:03,800
Yeah, I was one that showed you that.

559
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:07,800
He just turns around to the American flag.

560
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:16,800
He's like, he turns around to the person that said nothing beside him and like a secret service agents just like came across the side.

561
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:26,800
Let's listen to some Joe Biden gaffes, gaffes and gifts and gaps.

562
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:29,800
What is the most populated city on the planet?

563
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:37,800
Something done if you hold near and dear to you that you like to be able to.

564
00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:50,800
Anyway, we're going to get a lot done.

565
00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:59,800
The cave, I just got one.

566
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,800
You sleep.

567
00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:03,800
Dude, are you kidding me?

568
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:09,800
We put a fucking dementia ridden fucking elderly man in fucking presidency instead of Donald Trump.

569
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:11,800
You guys are fucking idiots.

570
00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:22,800
You're a bunch of absolute buffoons.

571
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:28,800
When our tard Jesus Christ, a piece of shit, I hope he gets fucking has a long.

572
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:30,800
This is why the two party system doesn't work.

573
00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:33,800
I hope he has a long and plentiful life.

574
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:38,800
I really hope nothing bad happens to him.

575
00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:39,800
Joe Biden.

576
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:44,800
Well, I mean, you ever see H3H3 like the guy who does like the vape nation shit.

577
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:45,800
Yeah.

578
00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:48,800
So did you hear about what happened with him and Ben Shapiro the other day?

579
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:49,800
No.

580
00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:55,800
So him and Ben Shapiro like fucking hate each other, like bitterly hate each other.

581
00:34:55,800 --> 00:35:01,800
And the H3H3 guy is a Jew and Ben Shapiro is also a Jew.

582
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:09,800
And they and on a street podcast, he says, hey, and I'm quoting this.

583
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:13,800
I'm not saying this myself in the next Holocaust.

584
00:35:13,800 --> 00:35:18,800
I hope I quoting quoting in the next Holocaust.

585
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:21,800
I hope Ben Shapiro and his family get killed first.

586
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:23,800
Why do they end quote?

587
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:25,800
That's a quote.

588
00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:26,800
I'm not saying that.

589
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:28,800
That is a quote from H3H3.

590
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:31,800
Why do they hate each other?

591
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,800
Because they're on the opposite sides of the political spectrum.

592
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:41,800
And then fucking Ben Shapiro actually if if there was another Holocaust, I hope

593
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:44,800
he didn't and his family would get away safely.

594
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:48,800
Okay, I think I really hope that I really hope that him and his family would get

595
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:49,800
away safely.

596
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:51,800
And that's a very awful thing for you to say to me.

597
00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:52,800
Okay.

598
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:53,800
All right.

599
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:56,800
Did we ever talk about Ben Shapiro's sister and her fucking milk truck titties?

600
00:35:56,800 --> 00:36:01,800
Yeah, unbelievable point where I would listen to Ben Shapiro like all the time

601
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:06,800
because you know, I don't agree with him, but it's just like he's just funny.

602
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:09,800
I'm really funny guy.

603
00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:12,800
I make jokes sometimes and I fucking retarded.

604
00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:15,800
Also, he talks like a fucking maniac.

605
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:16,800
Yeah.

606
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,800
Oh my God, Jeffrey Dommer, each people.

607
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:22,800
Yes, yes, he does.

608
00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:24,800
All right.

609
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:28,800
Let's take a break and Dan should join us when he comes back.

610
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:31,800
What did you just text you?

611
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:33,800
No, you should be here.

612
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,800
All right.

613
00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:37,800
Oh, man.

614
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:39,800
Yeah.

615
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:41,800
Yeah.

616
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,800
Yeah.

617
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:45,800
Yeah.

618
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:47,800
Yeah.

619
00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:49,800
Yeah.

620
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:51,800
Drop that fucking bitch.

621
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,800
I didn't do it.

622
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:58,800
I get my dick to your man.

623
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:01,800
Welcome back.

624
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:02,800
I give her a day.

625
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:06,800
She I met.

626
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:07,800
Look at me.

627
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:09,800
I got a hole in your boot.

628
00:37:09,800 --> 00:37:11,800
Well, I've got a little podcast.

629
00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:12,800
Dan's here.

630
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:18,800
It's all your parents.

631
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:21,800
We just work with chemicals that specific day.

632
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:22,800
My eyes.

633
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,800
We just working with chemicals that specific day.

634
00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:30,800
Maybe dude, something sitting in front of a computer for like eight hours makes you numb to everything.

635
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:31,800
Apparently.

636
00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:32,800
Oh, yeah.

637
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:33,800
This feels good.

638
00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,800
Crack that shit.

639
00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:39,800
Well, welcome back, Daniel.

640
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,800
Fuck yeah.

641
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:43,800
No, it's all this time.

642
00:37:43,800 --> 00:37:44,800
Yeah.

643
00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:46,800
He's not superhuman after all.

644
00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:49,800
Talk about doing cocaine in my basement.

645
00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:58,800
Yeah, dude, we got to talk about this and Frank thing because this is like, I can't even look at you right now.

646
00:37:58,800 --> 00:37:59,800
No.

647
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:06,800
So like we were on the topic of weird shit that we had to watch when we were in fucking middle school and elementary school.

648
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:12,800
And like we were talking about how like they're like, yeah, you got to watch like Holocaust shit fucking like elementary school.

649
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:15,800
And what was the only one that you watched?

650
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:16,800
Hotel Verwanda.

651
00:38:16,800 --> 00:38:17,800
Yeah, Hotel Wanda.

652
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:24,800
I watched that too with fucking War Machine, whatever the fuck that guy's name is.

653
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:25,800
Yeah.

654
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:34,800
But watching genocide videos fucking nine a.m. Tuesday in the broad daylight in school.

655
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:37,800
But when I was in elementary school, I was ten years old.

656
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,800
So mind you, I was ten years old at this point.

657
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:40,800
I'm stressing.

658
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:43,800
I was ten years old at this point.

659
00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:45,800
You shot out to get canceled.

660
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:49,800
We were watching Anne Frank, the true story.

661
00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:56,800
And it was a it was definitely the true story of Anne Frank.

662
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:58,800
It's the Holocaust.

663
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:01,800
So it's real fucked up.

664
00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:12,800
And we're telling Dan how this was my first boner was from this fucking movie.

665
00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:22,800
It's probably one of the more embarrassing stories I have is about the Holocaust fucking Anne Frank movie is part of my sexual awakening.

666
00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:25,800
But what part specifically?

667
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:29,800
So in the movie, mind you, I was ten.

668
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:32,800
I didn't know what the fuck was going on.

669
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:40,800
They took all like the women and like the men and they separated them and they stripped them and shaved their heads and shit because, you know, the Nazis were bad people.

670
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:54,800
But that was the first time I ever saw like a naked woman ever was like when the Holocaust fucking shit was on TV and my fucking ten year old brain didn't know how to comprehend it.

671
00:39:54,800 --> 00:40:02,800
So I'm just like I associated them shaving her head and then her having like a shaved head and like her.

672
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:05,800
She wasn't like naked like she was covering herself.

673
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:07,800
And mind you, I was ten years old.

674
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:09,800
I was ten years old when I was watching this.

675
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:10,800
She was fourteen in it.

676
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:11,800
I was ten.

677
00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:13,800
Okay, I was ten.

678
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:17,800
This isn't how I feel now, but this is how I felt when I was ten years old.

679
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:18,800
I'm stressing this.

680
00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:29,800
I was ten years old and they shaved her head and like they had to go by and like like there is only one lady that you could see her titties and like she was like an older lady.

681
00:40:29,800 --> 00:40:36,800
She was like in their forties and like she had a shaved head too because the Nazis in the camp shaved her fucking head.

682
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:42,800
And my ten year old brain couldn't comprehend anything other than titties.

683
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:53,800
I'm like like the whole movie about Anne Frank and her struggles and all this awful shit immediately went away because I saw titties when I was ten years old.

684
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:57,800
That Holocaust fetish.

685
00:40:57,800 --> 00:40:58,800
That's rough.

686
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:00,800
I don't have a Holocaust fetish.

687
00:41:00,800 --> 00:41:02,800
He said when you were ten.

688
00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:04,800
Apparently.

689
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:06,800
Let's show him pictures.

690
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:07,800
Hold on a second.

691
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:10,800
Show me pictures of the boy in his striped pajamas and shit.

692
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:11,800
Not that movie.

693
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:13,800
I'm just going to just a quick test here.

694
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:15,800
Just going to Google Holocaust pictures.

695
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:17,800
Holocaust pictures?

696
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:18,800
I'm just going to show you a picture.

697
00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:22,800
You tell me you tell me what kind of feelings this gives you.

698
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:26,800
How hard are you on a scale of one to zero?

699
00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:27,800
All right.

700
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:32,800
So if I show you a picture of hold on a sec.

701
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:34,800
Here we go.

702
00:41:34,800 --> 00:41:36,800
What do these do to you?

703
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:38,800
God.

704
00:41:38,800 --> 00:41:41,800
Star David.

705
00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:43,800
Does that turn you on?

706
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:46,800
I'm half German.

707
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:49,800
Well, I got a worse story than that.

708
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:52,800
I'll explain mine and last words.

709
00:41:52,800 --> 00:41:56,800
And then we'll talk about Casey and his library story because we're actually getting this on the record.

710
00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:57,800
Fuck you.

711
00:41:57,800 --> 00:42:00,800
I talked about fucking shit.

712
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:02,800
I don't know if Casey's going to go on the record.

713
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:04,800
Casey's not man enough to go on the record.

714
00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:08,800
I'm man enough to talk about how Anne Frank turned me on when I was 10 years old.

715
00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:15,800
I'll just say a few things about mine and then you can fill in the blanks.

716
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:19,800
So probably about 12 years old.

717
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:21,800
No access to anything.

718
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:22,800
All right.

719
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:24,800
So it's Slim Pickens.

720
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:29,800
The only thing on TV was Oprah.

721
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,800
That's all I'm going to say about that one.

722
00:42:31,800 --> 00:42:32,800
Oh my God.

723
00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:33,800
I'm going to leave it at that.

724
00:42:33,800 --> 00:42:36,800
You can fill in the blanks.

725
00:42:36,800 --> 00:42:37,800
Library.

726
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:38,800
Library.

727
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:39,800
Library.

728
00:42:39,800 --> 00:42:42,800
I don't want Casey to get canceled.

729
00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:44,800
He's not going to get canceled.

730
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:48,800
I think I'd get canceled more for Anne Frank.

731
00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:51,800
Let's look up the statute of limitations.

732
00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:54,800
I was 10.

733
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:57,800
So you wanted to talk about how you got ISIS ads on your Facebook.

734
00:42:57,800 --> 00:42:58,800
Oh, yeah, dude.

735
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:03,800
I figured you wanted to be here for this because this is something that I think that you'd like.

736
00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:07,800
So you know how you get the Facebook reels and shit when you go on Facebook?

737
00:43:07,800 --> 00:43:15,800
So I was scrolling through and then I just get a fucking video of a guy with an Arabic sans script as his name.

738
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:19,800
And it was just a fucking dude holding an AK-47 showing it.

739
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:24,800
And then I went to the comments and they were all in Arabic.

740
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,800
And I kept on hitting the translate button.

741
00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:31,800
And they said, what's the price? What's the price? What's the price? What's the price? What's the price?

742
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:33,800
And I'm like, oh, no.

743
00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:35,800
So then I clicked on his profile.

744
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:37,800
I'm like, let's fucking see what's going on here.

745
00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:42,800
Like, I got my private eye investigation skills, peaked my ears off.

746
00:43:42,800 --> 00:43:44,800
And I'm like, all right.

747
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:45,800
So I went on it.

748
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:55,800
And there's just pictures of him holding guns and with dudes in fucking Taliban gear and a picture of a truck with a fucking M4.

749
00:43:55,800 --> 00:43:58,800
They fucking like M60 in the back and shit.

750
00:43:58,800 --> 00:44:03,800
And I'm like, am I just getting fucking reels of fucking Al Qaeda?

751
00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:06,800
So I reported it for terrorism.

752
00:44:06,800 --> 00:44:11,800
Yeah, I mean, and like they got back to me and they're like, we're going to be looking into this.

753
00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:12,800
I'm like, please do.

754
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:18,800
Like, I'm like, because I'm like, I wanted to be like, like, if the feds were watching me, I didn't want to be like, oh, yeah, this is cool.

755
00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:21,800
I want to be like, I'm reporting this.

756
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:22,800
I'm not interested in this.

757
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:24,800
Please report this.

758
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:27,800
How much was it?

759
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:28,800
Dude, it was an AK-47.

760
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:32,800
You price it was an AK-47 you and I'm like, what do I give?

761
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:34,800
Oh, I thought there was something like snuff videos.

762
00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:35,800
No, no, no, no.

763
00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:39,800
Like they're selling like fucking firearms.

764
00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:40,800
Wow.

765
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:42,800
She's yeah, that's the again.

766
00:44:42,800 --> 00:44:43,800
Stay away from that.

767
00:44:43,800 --> 00:44:46,800
So I reported for terrorism.

768
00:44:46,800 --> 00:44:47,800
Is that one of the things in the drop?

769
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:48,800
Yeah, I can drop down thing.

770
00:44:48,800 --> 00:44:53,800
You can report for terrorism and like I'm like, this is like fucking some.

771
00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:54,800
Next level shit, man.

772
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:59,800
Like I think I've uncovered like a fucking terrorist selling guns ring just somehow.

773
00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:01,800
It just showed up in my fucking feed.

774
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:03,800
That terrorist like, hey, you want to buy a gun?

775
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:06,800
I'm like, is that Al Qaeda?

776
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:11,800
I wonder if it's not like entrapment, not entrapment, but the government like the government.

777
00:45:11,800 --> 00:45:17,800
Yeah, but like I like I reported for terrorism, so I think I'd be in the clear on that.

778
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,800
Like I clearly say this is terrorism.

779
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:28,800
Well, they're like, we see that you reported this post for terrorism, but that's not why we brought you in today.

780
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:31,800
We're listening to some content you put out.

781
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:33,800
Tell us about Anne Frank.

782
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:40,800
They slide a picture of Anne Frank across the table.

783
00:45:40,800 --> 00:45:42,800
They're like, how do you feel?

784
00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:43,800
How does this picture make you feel?

785
00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:45,800
Like sad.

786
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:48,800
I'm a grown man.

787
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:50,800
I know what the fucking things that happen there.

788
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:54,800
Also, why are you so like the Holocaust documentaries of 10 year olds?

789
00:45:54,800 --> 00:45:58,800
Like you can't grasp the Holocaust at 10 years old.

790
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:01,800
I don't know why I'm watching Hotel Rwanda when I was 12.

791
00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:05,800
I watched that in ninth grade, actually.

792
00:46:05,800 --> 00:46:08,800
Yeah, there was like back to the terrorist thing.

793
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:11,800
There's like a terrorist cell in the Catskills.

794
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:12,800
Yeah.

795
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:21,800
That they had like a whole training ground and that the FBI busted, but they're literally training like Al Qaeda.

796
00:46:21,800 --> 00:46:22,800
Splinter cells.

797
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:23,800
Yeah, sleeper cells.

798
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:24,800
It's fucking crazy.

799
00:46:24,800 --> 00:46:25,800
Homegrown terrorists.

800
00:46:25,800 --> 00:46:26,800
Yeah, dude, they're fucking.

801
00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:32,800
But like I was like when I got that, I'm like, what the fuck is happening?

802
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:33,800
Yeah.

803
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:35,800
Because like I was laying in bed next to my girlfriend.

804
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:39,800
I'm like, does this look like terrorism shit to you?

805
00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:48,800
And then like the guy just had like a whole bunch of reels about selling guns and like having like fucking like guns in the back of pickup trucks in like the Middle East.

806
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:51,800
And I'm like, this looks like fucking Al Qaeda.

807
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:56,800
Like, I got to like, you know how like normally you're like, you know, whatever, it's a fucking post on Facebook.

808
00:46:56,800 --> 00:47:01,800
I think I should, you know, like I'm normally like the guy who's like, I'm not going to say anything about anything.

809
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:05,800
And then I saw that Mike, I got to say something like type shit.

810
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:11,800
Dude, how many people have died at the end of a barrel of an AK?

811
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:12,800
A lot.

812
00:47:12,800 --> 00:47:14,800
How many lives have AK-47?

813
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:17,800
AK-47 is actually the most popular gun on the entire planet.

814
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:18,800
Oh, I'm sure.

815
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:22,800
I bet that statistic is like, I, I bet you can't accurately.

816
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:23,800
You can't accurately do that.

817
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:25,800
No, let me see.

818
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,800
I think the AK was actually originally made in Russia.

819
00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:29,800
Yeah.

820
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:30,800
Because it was made to be.

821
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:31,800
Klyushnikov.

822
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:32,800
Yeah.

823
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:37,800
It was made to be like the most easy to like disassemble and reassemble gun like ever.

824
00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:50,800
And that's why it's like used by so many like terror organizations and like splinter cells and shit and like Viet Cong and shit, because it's so much easier to take apart than like an M16 or an M4 because like American weapons are better.

825
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:53,800
Like they're made better, but they're way harder to take apart.

826
00:47:53,800 --> 00:48:00,800
But if you get like a jam in the field, like you have to fucking use your tools and like take down your fucking gun and like do that shit.

827
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:02,800
When an AK, you don't need tools to take down.

828
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:04,800
You just like pull it.

829
00:48:04,800 --> 00:48:05,800
I should stop talking about guns.

830
00:48:05,800 --> 00:48:08,800
What is the 47?

831
00:48:08,800 --> 00:48:10,800
There's an AK 47.

832
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:12,800
The year I think it was made.

833
00:48:12,800 --> 00:48:13,800
I think it was.

834
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:14,800
Yeah, I think it was the year.

835
00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:26,800
But then there's the AK 47U, which is the like smaller version where you has like the flip out stock where like you can like flip it in and like kind of hold it like a fucking like gangster or you can flip out the stock and actually use it as that.

836
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:31,800
And they also have like the more modern AK, which is actually shittier than the AK 47.

837
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:39,800
But the people are like, why are the lies like the M16 and the M4 like named like these weird things?

838
00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:52,800
And I'm like, well, the reason why everything in America is M1 or M2 or a M16 or an M4, it's because the M is for military.

839
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:57,800
And it's just basically just basically being like military like thing one like military.

840
00:48:57,800 --> 00:48:58,800
I believe that's the thing.

841
00:48:58,800 --> 00:48:59,800
Don't quote me on that.

842
00:48:59,800 --> 00:49:11,800
But I'm pretty sure like the American military uses M in front of like most of their things like the the helmet from World War Two for the Americans was actually called the M1 helmet.

843
00:49:11,800 --> 00:49:23,800
And then there was the M4, which is our current assault rifle. Actually, no, we switched to a SIG, which is technically now the M6 or the M7 or something.

844
00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:34,800
But it's weird how we like label guns because we had like the M14, which was like a it was like an M1 Garand, but like an upgraded version instead of having like the the clip.

845
00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:35,800
It was a magazine.

846
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:38,800
So you can actually put it in there.

847
00:49:38,800 --> 00:49:45,800
US government, if you're listening, this is fully within my Second Amendment rights to talk about this.

848
00:49:45,800 --> 00:49:47,800
Yeah, you're right.

849
00:49:47,800 --> 00:49:49,800
It is the year.

850
00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:52,800
Yeah, but the the M and whatever aren't named after the year.

851
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:55,800
It's just kind of just they throw a random number next to it.

852
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:58,800
Yeah, let me see.

853
00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:02,800
I'm still trying to look up how many people how many people.

854
00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:05,800
I know this looks like cum, but it's not cum.

855
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:06,800
Thank God.

856
00:50:06,800 --> 00:50:10,800
Because you were guzzling that shit.

857
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:11,800
That titty milk.

858
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:16,800
So I got a I got a little movie review that I wanted everybody here to hear about.

859
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:20,800
It's a little movie called American Satan.

860
00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:21,800
Yeah, what is that?

861
00:50:21,800 --> 00:50:25,800
So, you know, Black Bill Brides, the band.

862
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:26,800
I've heard of them. Yeah.

863
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:30,800
So lead singer of that band is actually the star of the movie.

864
00:50:30,800 --> 00:50:37,800
So this is one of the most bad shit plot plots I've ever.

865
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:38,800
All right, we're back.

866
00:50:38,800 --> 00:50:40,800
It was like, OK, so back to what I was saying.

867
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:48,800
American Satan is one of the most bad shit fucking insane movie plots that I've ever heard or seen in my entire fucking life.

868
00:50:48,800 --> 00:50:53,800
So it has the lead singer of Black Veil Brides, Andy fucking something.

869
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:57,800
And it's about a band called the Relentless.

870
00:50:57,800 --> 00:51:02,800
And the fucking soundtrack for that movie is a fucking banger.

871
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:04,800
Like it is a solid fucking soundtrack.

872
00:51:04,800 --> 00:51:11,800
But the funny thing is they don't use the lead singer of the Black Veil Brides as this as the as the vocalist.

873
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:14,800
They actually use the guy from Palace Royale, which is a whole other story.

874
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:24,800
But so the movie plot, this guy and his band moved to California and they're they're they're called the Relentless, which is their band name.

875
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:27,800
And so a lot of stuff happened.

876
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:31,800
He like breaks up with like his like sweetheart girlfriend, whatever.

877
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:36,800
And he he ended up going to L.A. to be in this band.

878
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:39,800
And he's like living in his van and he makes a deal with the devil.

879
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:43,800
And the devil is played by fuck.

880
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:44,800
I got to look that up.

881
00:51:44,800 --> 00:51:50,800
But like it's literally like if you see the guy, you'll be like, holy shit, like he's the devil guy.

882
00:51:50,800 --> 00:51:54,800
American Satan.

883
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:55,800
We're good.

884
00:51:55,800 --> 00:51:57,800
So where is this movie?

885
00:51:57,800 --> 00:51:59,800
Where can I see it?

886
00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:00,800
Let me see.

887
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:02,800
It actually has a show now.

888
00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:03,800
It's on Tubi for free.

889
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:07,800
You can watch it on Tubi for free.

890
00:52:07,800 --> 00:52:09,800
And it came out in 2017.

891
00:52:09,800 --> 00:52:10,800
The lead.

892
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:14,800
Oh, Matham, Malcolm McDowell is the devil.

893
00:52:14,800 --> 00:52:15,800
Let me look that up.

894
00:52:15,800 --> 00:52:17,800
Let me see what this looks like.

895
00:52:17,800 --> 00:52:19,800
You'll know him exactly when you see him.

896
00:52:19,800 --> 00:52:23,800
So Malcolm McDowell is the devil and like he makes a deal with them.

897
00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:30,800
So in the movie, they the guy makes a deal with the devil and then immediately gets signed to like a record deal.

898
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:37,800
And the devil was just like, hey, the only thing you got to do is name your album American Satan.

899
00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:46,800
And so the guy gets like this huge fucking band like his band becomes like fucking nationwide, like fucking bestsellers, like all that shit.

900
00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:51,800
And then he meets this like dikey like looking girl fucking really hot.

901
00:52:51,800 --> 00:53:03,800
But like he meets this girl and his his mom starts fucking the devil like Malcolm McDowell like starts like like the devil's now his stepdad.

902
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:04,800
Who writes this?

903
00:53:04,800 --> 00:53:13,800
So so this is what's like like he's like he's like doing all this shit like he's having like all these like Existence of Christ like, oh, I'm fucking I did a deal with the devil.

904
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:16,800
Oh, no, my mom's fucking the devil now.

905
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:17,800
Oh, no.

906
00:53:17,800 --> 00:53:20,800
And then like it gets fucking way crazier.

907
00:53:20,800 --> 00:53:21,800
It's just like the beginning.

908
00:53:21,800 --> 00:53:31,800
So Drake Bell is in this and Drake Bell is a rapist in the movie and Drake Bell like rapes this girl.

909
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:40,800
And then he then the lead the character fucking it's so on the nose.

910
00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:47,800
His last name is Faust like Dr Faust this like the story about like the guy who does a deal with the devil.

911
00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:56,800
You know, it's that on the fucking nose and like he he like finds out that Drake Bell like raped like his friend or something.

912
00:53:56,800 --> 00:54:00,800
And he goes to his house and the devil's like, hey, man, you know what you got to do.

913
00:54:00,800 --> 00:54:05,800
And the guy's like what he's like, you got to burn down his fucking house.

914
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:12,800
And he's like, that seems like a good idea. So he burns down the guy's house with him in it and Drake Bell burns alive.

915
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:20,800
So he writes a song called Let Them Burn and he starts like singing in the sets and you're like, wow, this is a pretty epic song, man.

916
00:54:20,800 --> 00:54:21,800
Like, this is crazy.

917
00:54:21,800 --> 00:54:24,800
So stupid shit happens.

918
00:54:24,800 --> 00:54:26,800
Like the band starts like, you know, getting fucky.

919
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:30,800
Like he goes to a bunch of like strip clubs that are like, you know, demon themed or whatever.

920
00:54:30,800 --> 00:54:31,800
Watch it just for that.

921
00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:37,800
It's like he goes to a bunch of like strip clubs like demon girls and shit and like they have like their titties out and like devil horns.

922
00:54:37,800 --> 00:54:39,800
It's fucking weird.

923
00:54:39,800 --> 00:54:46,800
But eventually his like his like homes like his hometown sweetheart is like trying to get back together with him.

924
00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:49,800
But he's fucking this like the like this dyke bitch.

925
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:53,800
And like she's like trying to be like his like his soul, like like connection to the light.

926
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:59,800
Like he's that's like that's the only thing that like he's connected to that's bringing him back from like this darkness.

927
00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:06,800
And then he finds out that lo and behold, the devil is also the dyke bitch and his stepdad.

928
00:55:06,800 --> 00:55:07,800
So he's fucked.

929
00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:12,800
The devil is fucking him and his mom at the same time.

930
00:55:12,800 --> 00:55:16,800
And then at the end of the movie, he like gets out of the devil deal in some fucking weird way.

931
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:23,800
And he's in prison and he keeps on being just like, you know, the devil fucked my mom and fucked me too.

932
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:27,800
Like what the fuck's going on is like high school sweetheart goes like, it's OK, man.

933
00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:29,800
We'll work it out together.

934
00:55:29,800 --> 00:55:30,800
It'll be fine.

935
00:55:30,800 --> 00:55:32,800
And he's just like, oh, he's like punching the wall and shit.

936
00:55:32,800 --> 00:55:34,800
He's like fucking stuck in prison.

937
00:55:34,800 --> 00:55:35,800
He's stuck in prison.

938
00:55:35,800 --> 00:55:40,800
But then apparently there's a series about it now called Paradise City or something.

939
00:55:40,800 --> 00:55:44,800
And like I haven't watched the series, but like the movie was fucking bat shit.

940
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:45,800
Fucking insane.

941
00:55:45,800 --> 00:55:47,800
Sounds pretty good.

942
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:52,800
I usually I don't watch a lot of fiction, but I feel like I need to start.

943
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:55,800
Dude, the band is fucking like relaxing a little bit.

944
00:55:55,800 --> 00:55:58,800
The Relentless is a fucking solid band, though.

945
00:55:58,800 --> 00:56:01,800
Like I would listen to them if they had more than like three songs.

946
00:56:01,800 --> 00:56:04,800
But like it's fucking solid.

947
00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:06,800
The Relentless.

948
00:56:06,800 --> 00:56:07,800
The Relentless. Yeah.

949
00:56:07,800 --> 00:56:09,800
What's the song that they do?

950
00:56:09,800 --> 00:56:11,800
There's a couple of good ones.

951
00:56:11,800 --> 00:56:12,800
Me Against the Devil.

952
00:56:12,800 --> 00:56:14,800
Real edgy name, but that's a good one.

953
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:16,800
Somebody really likes the devil.

954
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:20,800
Forgive Me Mother, For I Have Sinned is another one.

955
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:23,800
Let Them Burn.

956
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:26,800
And there's a couple other songs.

957
00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:33,800
Oh, it's a fucking sick song.

958
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:36,800
What kind of music this is?

959
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:48,800
Yeah, I fuck with that.

960
00:56:48,800 --> 00:56:53,800
I'd be like the best shit.

961
00:56:53,800 --> 00:56:58,800
Yeah, but it's really fucking the song is fucking solid.

962
00:56:58,800 --> 00:57:02,800
Like it's like even if the movie sucks, the music itself is good.

963
00:57:02,800 --> 00:57:04,800
So I'm like, I'm OK with that.

964
00:57:04,800 --> 00:57:09,800
And even as a good Catholic boy, they got they got some bangers.

965
00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:12,800
But like most of the songs are about fighting the devil.

966
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:16,800
So I'm like my Catholic boy self can get on with that shit.

967
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:21,800
Yeah, but yeah, that was a fucking wild movie, man.

968
00:57:21,800 --> 00:57:23,800
Yes. What was the name of it one more time?

969
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:24,800
American Satan.

970
00:57:24,800 --> 00:57:25,800
American Satan.

971
00:57:25,800 --> 00:57:26,800
Yeah.

972
00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:27,800
Check that out.

973
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:28,800
And you said where can you see it?

974
00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:31,800
It's on like that weird app, Tubi for free.

975
00:57:31,800 --> 00:57:32,800
Oh, yeah.

976
00:57:32,800 --> 00:57:33,800
And fucking whatever.

977
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:34,800
I bet it's online too.

978
00:57:34,800 --> 00:57:35,800
Yeah.

979
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:36,800
I'll just pirate it.

980
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:37,800
Yeah.

981
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:38,800
Pirate Bay.

982
00:57:38,800 --> 00:57:39,800
Yo ho.

983
00:57:39,800 --> 00:57:40,800
Is that still a thing?

984
00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:41,800
Yeah.

985
00:57:41,800 --> 00:57:42,800
Is it really?

986
00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:43,800
Yeah, Pirate Bay still a thing.

987
00:57:43,800 --> 00:57:44,800
How did they not get shut down?

988
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:45,800
I don't know.

989
00:57:45,800 --> 00:57:46,800
They keep opening new websites.

990
00:57:46,800 --> 00:57:47,800
Yeah.

991
00:57:47,800 --> 00:57:48,800
No shit.

992
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:53,800
There was that guy that what was that really popular pirating site?

993
00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:55,800
Silk Road.

994
00:57:55,800 --> 00:57:56,800
No.

995
00:57:56,800 --> 00:57:58,800
Damn, this was like.

996
00:57:58,800 --> 00:57:59,800
Lime wire.

997
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:00,800
Not lime wire.

998
00:58:00,800 --> 00:58:01,800
This was Napster.

999
00:58:01,800 --> 00:58:03,800
It's not like just music.

1000
00:58:03,800 --> 00:58:07,800
Well, you know how Napster and LimeWire were primarily music?

1001
00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:08,800
Yeah.

1002
00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:09,800
This was like for every.

1003
00:58:09,800 --> 00:58:15,480
But then you could download power by by Kanye West and end up getting a fucking hardcore

1004
00:58:15,480 --> 00:58:19,680
porn video of like two midgets fucking in a bear suit or whatever.

1005
00:58:19,680 --> 00:58:20,680
Like disappointment.

1006
00:58:20,680 --> 00:58:24,840
I'm like, dude, I just want to listen to my fucking fucking Kanye West.

1007
00:58:24,840 --> 00:58:30,760
Who told me that you two apologize for putting their music on everyone's phones in twenty

1008
00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:31,760
nineteen?

1009
00:58:31,760 --> 00:58:33,440
Dude, I hate you too.

1010
00:58:33,440 --> 00:58:36,840
For that reason, does everyone actually listen to YouTube?

1011
00:58:36,840 --> 00:58:37,840
My dad.

1012
00:58:37,840 --> 00:58:39,400
Yeah, my dad likes YouTube.

1013
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:41,120
But what is one of their songs?

1014
00:58:41,120 --> 00:58:43,640
Why parents like you do actually fucking.

1015
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:45,640
Without you.

1016
00:58:45,640 --> 00:58:48,840
Oh, I know that one.

1017
00:58:48,840 --> 00:58:50,840
The streets have no name.

1018
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:51,840
Yeah.

1019
00:58:51,840 --> 00:58:54,840
What was I going to look up?

1020
00:58:54,840 --> 00:59:02,440
Oh, that one guy that got busted for owning the largest pirating site.

1021
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:10,000
Dude, he was worth like like billions of dollars and they they just raided his house and like

1022
00:59:10,000 --> 00:59:11,000
shut his life down.

1023
00:59:11,000 --> 00:59:12,440
I felt bad for the guy, but it's like.

1024
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:13,840
You know, he's a pirate.

1025
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:14,840
Yo ho, yo ho.

1026
00:59:14,840 --> 00:59:18,040
I mean, he was just the he's the modern day blackbeard.

1027
00:59:18,040 --> 00:59:19,040
Yeah, yeah.

1028
00:59:19,040 --> 00:59:24,640
So there was watching this drug documentary and there's this one drug ink.

1029
00:59:24,640 --> 00:59:28,960
There's this one like fifteen year old kid in Sweden that got busted for running like

1030
00:59:28,960 --> 00:59:32,360
a drug out player from his fucking bedroom.

1031
00:59:32,360 --> 00:59:34,480
What a guy.

1032
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:35,480
His computer.

1033
00:59:35,480 --> 00:59:36,480
Yeah.

1034
00:59:36,480 --> 00:59:37,480
A drug empire.

1035
00:59:37,480 --> 00:59:38,480
Yeah.

1036
00:59:38,480 --> 00:59:39,480
A math empire.

1037
00:59:39,480 --> 00:59:41,480
He's a fifteen year old.

1038
00:59:41,480 --> 00:59:42,480
That's awesome.

1039
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:48,040
He would like set up the dealers and like the the you know, that's the type of kid that

1040
00:59:48,040 --> 00:59:49,040
they like.

1041
00:59:49,040 --> 00:59:50,040
The FBI.

1042
00:59:50,040 --> 00:59:51,040
Yeah.

1043
00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:54,960
Like there's a whole bunch of like time from like the FBI was like, hey, you either teach

1044
00:59:54,960 --> 00:59:59,200
us how to do that shit and join us or go into jail for like thirty seven years.

1045
00:59:59,200 --> 01:00:02,600
Dude, they they're so advanced.

1046
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:03,960
What the government has.

1047
01:00:03,960 --> 01:00:05,880
What was I watching?

1048
01:00:05,880 --> 01:00:11,080
Oh, it was just this like video that popped up on Facebook and it was this guy.

1049
01:00:11,080 --> 01:00:12,840
He was like Al Qaeda terrorist.

1050
01:00:12,840 --> 01:00:16,800
No, you worked on Wall Street.

1051
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:19,320
But that's why he was in the US to work on Wall Street.

1052
01:00:19,320 --> 01:00:24,960
But he also sold ecstasy at raves like at night.

1053
01:00:24,960 --> 01:00:27,820
And he made so much money selling ecstasy.

1054
01:00:27,820 --> 01:00:30,280
But then he was smart and he got out of it.

1055
01:00:30,280 --> 01:00:34,160
He was like, all right, I made like, you know, a million bucks doing this or whatever.

1056
01:00:34,160 --> 01:00:36,560
So I'm going to get out of the game.

1057
01:00:36,560 --> 01:00:38,640
But there's a statute of limitations.

1058
01:00:38,640 --> 01:00:44,280
So it was like five or six years later, they came after him and they did a raid on his

1059
01:00:44,280 --> 01:00:45,280
house and they caught him.

1060
01:00:45,280 --> 01:00:46,280
What's a statute of limitations?

1061
01:00:46,280 --> 01:00:48,800
You don't know what a statute of limitations is?

1062
01:00:48,800 --> 01:00:49,800
Fucking idiot.

1063
01:00:49,800 --> 01:01:00,240
So it's basically like if you commit a crime, like, I don't know, doing something in a library.

1064
01:01:00,240 --> 01:01:03,760
There's a certain period of time where they can prosecute you for that crime.

1065
01:01:03,760 --> 01:01:08,600
So say it's like statute of limitations is 10 years and eight years down the road, they

1066
01:01:08,600 --> 01:01:09,600
come.

1067
01:01:09,600 --> 01:01:10,600
They come.

1068
01:01:10,600 --> 01:01:11,600
They come.

1069
01:01:11,600 --> 01:01:12,600
I assume it's not for murderers.

1070
01:01:12,600 --> 01:01:13,600
They come for you.

1071
01:01:13,600 --> 01:01:17,160
Murder is the only crime with no statute of limitations.

1072
01:01:17,160 --> 01:01:18,400
I think rape might not.

1073
01:01:18,400 --> 01:01:19,560
No, rape does too.

1074
01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:21,440
It does have a statute of limitations.

1075
01:01:21,440 --> 01:01:22,680
I think 20 years.

1076
01:01:22,680 --> 01:01:23,680
Yeah.

1077
01:01:23,680 --> 01:01:26,720
So this was within the statute of limitations on that.

1078
01:01:26,720 --> 01:01:30,480
And he said, so he had a ton of money.

1079
01:01:30,480 --> 01:01:31,480
This guy was loaded.

1080
01:01:31,480 --> 01:01:32,480
Right?

1081
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:33,480
He was a young guy.

1082
01:01:33,480 --> 01:01:34,480
I was like in his 20s.

1083
01:01:34,480 --> 01:01:38,240
And they knew where all his money was and all the accounts, everything.

1084
01:01:38,240 --> 01:01:43,960
He couldn't hide it because the government put a Trojan horse virus on his computer and

1085
01:01:43,960 --> 01:01:47,480
it told him where all his money was located.

1086
01:01:47,480 --> 01:01:50,760
And he said, now think that's 20 years ago.

1087
01:01:50,760 --> 01:01:52,360
Think of what they have now.

1088
01:01:52,360 --> 01:01:53,360
Yeah.

1089
01:01:53,360 --> 01:01:55,680
Like, bro, they honestly...

1090
01:01:55,680 --> 01:02:02,080
I also, there's like one of the tactics that they use is they tell you that they know everything

1091
01:02:02,080 --> 01:02:06,960
about you and they don't because you're automatically going to feel like, oh shit, they know everything

1092
01:02:06,960 --> 01:02:07,960
about me.

1093
01:02:07,960 --> 01:02:10,280
They're going to tell them or they think that I'm lying.

1094
01:02:10,280 --> 01:02:14,360
If a Fed is asking you something, they don't know.

1095
01:02:14,360 --> 01:02:15,360
That's why they're asking.

1096
01:02:15,360 --> 01:02:18,240
If the Fed's new, they wouldn't ask you type shit.

1097
01:02:18,240 --> 01:02:23,000
Well, I mean, think if you have a conversation with somebody on your cell phone, they can

1098
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:24,000
hear it.

1099
01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:25,000
Yeah.

1100
01:02:25,000 --> 01:02:26,360
And it's not just like, oh, they tap into your phone.

1101
01:02:26,360 --> 01:02:29,160
Bro, you or I can get the equipment to do this.

1102
01:02:29,160 --> 01:02:30,160
Yeah, it's easy.

1103
01:02:30,160 --> 01:02:33,920
I think we talked about this maybe before, but like an MZ device.

1104
01:02:33,920 --> 01:02:38,000
So it's literally a device that goes, it has antennas on it.

1105
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:42,160
It's like in like a briefcase kind of thing from what I've seen.

1106
01:02:42,160 --> 01:02:44,160
And you can order these on eBay.

1107
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:48,960
So what it does is it intercepts a signal between the cell phone and the tower and it

1108
01:02:48,960 --> 01:02:53,800
pretends to be the tower and it just steals all the information in between and then relays

1109
01:02:53,800 --> 01:02:55,180
it back to the tower.

1110
01:02:55,180 --> 01:02:56,900
So it's just a middleman.

1111
01:02:56,900 --> 01:02:59,040
So you could buy one of these.

1112
01:02:59,040 --> 01:03:02,240
None of this, none of the conversations you have on your phone are encrypted.

1113
01:03:02,240 --> 01:03:04,280
Yeah, there's no end to end encryption.

1114
01:03:04,280 --> 01:03:08,920
That's why Twitter's like why what Elon Musk is trying to do with Twitter is a big deal,

1115
01:03:08,920 --> 01:03:09,920
which I want to get into.

1116
01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:10,920
We'll get into that.

1117
01:03:10,920 --> 01:03:14,160
I wanted you to finish this because I want to get into the whole Elon buying Twitter

1118
01:03:14,160 --> 01:03:17,960
thing too, but I want to hear the rest of this.

1119
01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:18,960
No.

1120
01:03:18,960 --> 01:03:23,360
So you just got to think like this is why cell phones are not HIPAA compliant, right?

1121
01:03:23,360 --> 01:03:26,520
Health insurance, people who don't know what that is.

1122
01:03:26,520 --> 01:03:30,160
Health insurance, accountability and portability.

1123
01:03:30,160 --> 01:03:31,440
That's also why radio waves.

1124
01:03:31,440 --> 01:03:35,800
Yeah, like radio waves are also not because like anybody can listen to our frequencies

1125
01:03:35,800 --> 01:03:36,800
or anything.

1126
01:03:36,800 --> 01:03:41,600
Cell phones you might as well just think anything you say over your phone, somebody else can

1127
01:03:41,600 --> 01:03:44,160
hear and it's not that hard.

1128
01:03:44,160 --> 01:03:47,480
And you think, oh, well, I can talk about this and nobody's going to hear it.

1129
01:03:47,480 --> 01:03:48,480
Nope.

1130
01:03:48,480 --> 01:03:52,480
Somebody could be sitting as long as they're between your cell phone and the cell phone

1131
01:03:52,480 --> 01:03:54,200
tower, they can pick it up.

1132
01:03:54,200 --> 01:03:55,200
Yeah.

1133
01:03:55,200 --> 01:03:56,200
It's terrifying.

1134
01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:57,200
And it's not illegal.

1135
01:03:57,200 --> 01:04:02,640
There's also a fed, there's also a fucking FBI building in like every major city in America.

1136
01:04:02,640 --> 01:04:08,640
So you'd figure every single FBI fucking thing, but they got to fucking pick out the ones

1137
01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:10,200
that's the, that's the problem.

1138
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:12,000
The question is, can they hear this right now?

1139
01:04:12,000 --> 01:04:13,000
Oh, they can absolutely.

1140
01:04:13,000 --> 01:04:16,000
It's on the internet so they can hear.

1141
01:04:16,000 --> 01:04:17,600
Can they hear this live?

1142
01:04:17,600 --> 01:04:18,600
Oh yeah.

1143
01:04:18,600 --> 01:04:19,600
Absolutely.

1144
01:04:19,600 --> 01:04:23,080
Mike, I have my mics wired to the FBI database.

1145
01:04:23,080 --> 01:04:24,080
Oh, fuck.

1146
01:04:24,080 --> 01:04:25,080
Yeah.

1147
01:04:25,080 --> 01:04:26,080
Damn it.

1148
01:04:26,080 --> 01:04:27,080
I was 10.

1149
01:04:27,080 --> 01:04:28,080
I was 10 years old.

1150
01:04:28,080 --> 01:04:31,080
I was 10.

1151
01:04:31,080 --> 01:04:34,080
And also this, this place in the library was hidden.

1152
01:04:34,080 --> 01:04:39,640
I was out of public view and tell us the library story case for me.

1153
01:04:39,640 --> 01:04:44,840
I'll just say Oprah had some nice makeup on that day for me.

1154
01:04:44,840 --> 01:04:47,280
I was 10 years old and I didn't know what Tits looked like.

1155
01:04:47,280 --> 01:04:54,200
I was in the library when I was 16 and Oprah came and I just busted all

1156
01:04:54,200 --> 01:04:59,440
right.

1157
01:04:59,440 --> 01:05:02,320
We don't want Casey to get canceled.

1158
01:05:02,320 --> 01:05:04,360
I'm already the one that's canceled, dude.

1159
01:05:04,360 --> 01:05:05,360
That's all right.

1160
01:05:05,360 --> 01:05:06,360
Let's get fucking canceled, bro.

1161
01:05:06,360 --> 01:05:07,360
Can't get canceled.

1162
01:05:07,360 --> 01:05:08,360
We got canceled.

1163
01:05:08,360 --> 01:05:09,360
We have the canceled episode.

1164
01:05:09,360 --> 01:05:10,360
He's listening anymore.

1165
01:05:10,360 --> 01:05:11,360
We had 150 plays.

1166
01:05:11,360 --> 01:05:12,360
We're down to five and three of them are me.

1167
01:05:12,360 --> 01:05:13,360
Let's, let's talk about Twitter deal with, with Elon.

1168
01:05:13,360 --> 01:05:14,360
Yeah.

1169
01:05:14,360 --> 01:05:15,360
I'm not sure.

1170
01:05:15,360 --> 01:05:16,360
I'm not sure.

1171
01:05:16,360 --> 01:05:17,360
I'm not sure.

1172
01:05:17,360 --> 01:05:18,360
I'm not sure.

1173
01:05:18,360 --> 01:05:19,360
I'm not sure.

1174
01:05:19,360 --> 01:05:20,360
I'm not sure.

1175
01:05:20,360 --> 01:05:21,360
I'm not sure.

1176
01:05:21,360 --> 01:05:22,360
I'm not sure.

1177
01:05:22,360 --> 01:05:23,360
I'm not sure.

1178
01:05:23,360 --> 01:05:24,360
A while ago.

1179
01:05:24,360 --> 01:05:25,360
We did have Twitter deal with Elon.

1180
01:05:25,360 --> 01:05:26,360
Daul help you bought Twitter.

1181
01:05:26,360 --> 01:05:27,360
He actually, it went through.

1182
01:05:27,360 --> 01:05:27,880
He owns, he owns Twitter now.

1183
01:05:29,320 --> 01:05:29,880
He brought in the SYNC.

1184
01:05:29,880 --> 01:05:30,880
Yeah.

1185
01:05:30,880 --> 01:05:33,520
He's likeLet, so like fuck, dude, I don't matter how rich you are, that's not going

1186
01:05:33,520 --> 01:05:34,520
to be funny.

1187
01:05:34,520 --> 01:05:35,520
Right.

1188
01:05:35,520 --> 01:05:36,520
I think that's the point is.

1189
01:05:36,520 --> 01:05:39,040
But like, but like he went in.

1190
01:05:39,040 --> 01:05:44,180
The first thing that he did was fire like this, like the head guy and like the, like

1191
01:05:44,180 --> 01:05:47,060
the three, like in command, he'd just fucking fired him immediately.

1192
01:05:47,060 --> 01:05:50,300
Then he went through on a fucking like crusade and cut out the

1193
01:05:51,100 --> 01:05:55,360
social justice like camp like braid he cut out the the

1194
01:05:56,900 --> 01:05:59,700
Equity braid he cut out the

1195
01:06:00,700 --> 01:06:08,340
Anti-semi brigade like the like the like censoring shit like he just went through and fucking clean house at this point like all the

1196
01:06:08,700 --> 01:06:12,220
Know the censorship. That's good. Yeah, he like cut out everything

1197
01:06:12,220 --> 01:06:17,460
Yeah, but I mean they still haven't released Alex Jones though. I

1198
01:06:18,300 --> 01:06:24,100
Don't know. I mean, I think that they do have some obligation to make sure that it's I mean

1199
01:06:24,100 --> 01:06:26,580
They're a corporation and they don't want people to stop using

1200
01:06:27,420 --> 01:06:32,680
Twitter, you know, but whatever he fucking owns it. You knew whatever the fuck he wants with it, you know

1201
01:06:33,900 --> 01:06:40,420
Good for him. Good for him Elon Musk. He's a fucking guy. I uh sat in a Tesla today

1202
01:06:40,420 --> 01:06:41,420
I

1203
01:06:41,420 --> 01:06:43,420
Yeah, it was

1204
01:06:43,740 --> 01:06:45,260
Terrible

1205
01:06:45,260 --> 01:06:47,900
Honestly, like I wanted it to be so much better than it was

1206
01:06:48,580 --> 01:06:53,300
Because I was waiting for service to be done at the Toyota dealership and they had a used one that came in on trade

1207
01:06:53,300 --> 01:06:55,820
Sitting out front and it was open. So I sat

1208
01:06:56,500 --> 01:07:04,220
It was it was cool, right? But it has like that that airplane yoke steering wheel. Yeah, but the buttons felt fucking cheap

1209
01:07:04,220 --> 01:07:11,900
Like I was scrolling through the volume and like the volume like on the display didn't go up like smoothly

1210
01:07:11,900 --> 01:07:13,900
It was like did it have the keys in it?

1211
01:07:14,020 --> 01:07:20,140
No, you didn't it was just unlocked. So if it's unlocked you can get in and play with the radio and everything

1212
01:07:20,140 --> 01:07:24,620
Oh, you just can't start it. But um, I just steal it

1213
01:07:25,260 --> 01:07:30,740
Scroll wheel on the steering wheel felt like it was fucking from a cheap knockoff PlayStation controller

1214
01:07:30,740 --> 01:07:36,980
You know, it just felt shitty and like the lights like turning on the lights. They just felt really cheap

1215
01:07:37,220 --> 01:07:42,780
Speaking of cars just cheap cheap in the cars. I gotta spend two grand on my car and fucking Monday

1216
01:07:42,780 --> 01:07:49,760
Why what's wrong with it? I was going to to get my my sister-in-law a birthday card

1217
01:07:50,540 --> 01:07:54,940
And I was taking a turn and some guy came fucking flying out

1218
01:07:54,940 --> 01:07:59,900
It was either hit the guy or hit the curb and no good deed goes unpunished

1219
01:07:59,900 --> 01:08:04,740
And I hit the curb fucking blew my tire folded the wheel in bent the tie rod

1220
01:08:05,100 --> 01:08:09,300
No, the tie rods fine actually, but um, but the control arm. No it

1221
01:08:09,900 --> 01:08:12,340
The rotors fucked so I have to get a new rotor

1222
01:08:12,340 --> 01:08:17,760
The road is fucked is the rotors been fucked like I like I went in there and I'm like listen

1223
01:08:17,760 --> 01:08:20,660
I'm gonna need new rotors. I'm gonna need new brake pads

1224
01:08:20,820 --> 01:08:24,100
I'll just get four new tires cuz fuck it at this point and I need to get a

1225
01:08:24,100 --> 01:08:30,940
A new blower for my AC cuz it went out like, you know, I was telling you guys back in like June the fan

1226
01:08:31,300 --> 01:08:38,460
What kind of car you have Subaru Impreza? What year is it 2016? Oh, it's pretty new. Yeah, but I covered by insurance

1227
01:08:38,780 --> 01:08:43,660
No, no, it's fucking you know under the table shit. I say it's pretty

1228
01:08:44,180 --> 01:08:49,340
Not that new but six years old. Yeah. Yeah, that's so I got it. It's not that new

1229
01:08:49,340 --> 01:08:51,700
I got the summer of 2016

1230
01:08:51,700 --> 01:08:56,140
So I got one of the brand new like I was the only one to drive it

1231
01:08:56,540 --> 01:09:00,460
It's all paid off now and shit. So like dude if I had a garage I'd hook you up

1232
01:09:00,460 --> 01:09:05,940
I'd say just come over and we'd fucking do it, but I just have a fucking driveway to work in

1233
01:09:05,940 --> 01:09:10,660
That's what I'm trying to find a place with a garage because it's just like I need it to work on everything

1234
01:09:10,940 --> 01:09:12,540
Like I would do the tires myself

1235
01:09:12,540 --> 01:09:17,020
But I don't know how to do like the fucking like thing where you do like the funk with the tires and like put out

1236
01:09:17,020 --> 01:09:19,700
You can't do that yourself. Yeah. Yeah, I know what you're talking

1237
01:09:19,700 --> 01:09:26,420
No, you gotta you gotta take it to a shop that like properly will like also your wheels probably then if you hit the curb

1238
01:09:26,420 --> 01:09:29,060
Hard enough to um, I actually looked at the rim. The rims actually fine

1239
01:09:29,060 --> 01:09:35,180
Like I did like the whole like so the tires flat. Yeah tires tires flat. I have I'm riding on a donut right now

1240
01:09:35,180 --> 01:09:39,980
I'm gonna say if you hit hard enough to pop the tire then

1241
01:09:40,660 --> 01:09:44,780
You're gonna need an alignment. No, at least you're gonna need the parts inspected

1242
01:09:44,780 --> 01:09:49,180
Yeah, I would expect like that wheel bearing on that side to go bad prematurely now

1243
01:09:49,180 --> 01:09:51,180
Yeah, and

1244
01:09:51,220 --> 01:09:53,860
You know you want to check like your tire rods and all that stuff

1245
01:09:53,860 --> 01:09:58,340
Yeah, I'm getting like the whole like diagnostic shit done because like they're gonna align it

1246
01:09:58,340 --> 01:10:02,660
they're gonna give me new rotors new brake pads new tires a new blower and

1247
01:10:03,620 --> 01:10:09,020
But like they're gonna be a fucking deal cuz all that shit. They're only charging me 18 for yes. That's not too bad

1248
01:10:09,020 --> 01:10:14,000
I mean honestly that blower you could probably do yourself and say yeah, I was gonna do that myself

1249
01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:18,020
But then it's getting cold so you might not want to mess around too much

1250
01:10:18,020 --> 01:10:23,180
But like I could I the the dashboard that I have has an entire like computer display through it

1251
01:10:23,180 --> 01:10:27,980
So like taking that out and like having to redo all like the wires and shit on that would be annoying

1252
01:10:27,980 --> 01:10:29,420
You might not have to

1253
01:10:29,420 --> 01:10:33,340
Sometimes sometimes it's just taking the gold box out and it's right behind the glove box

1254
01:10:33,340 --> 01:10:40,020
Yeah, and sometimes it's like three bolts, dude. So just be careful. You don't want to overspend but you also don't want to waste your time

1255
01:10:40,020 --> 01:10:43,820
There's like that happy medium like you got to know when to pay the man for that kind of stuff

1256
01:10:43,820 --> 01:10:45,980
Yeah, and then you got to know when you can do it yourself

1257
01:10:45,980 --> 01:10:53,380
So because I checked it and it wasn't underneath the it wasn't underneath the glove box. It's actually behind the center console

1258
01:10:54,060 --> 01:10:59,180
Really? Yeah, it's fucking weird. Yeah, these cards are weird. Yeah, I mean, you know, don't fuck with it

1259
01:10:59,180 --> 01:11:03,560
Then I mean watch YouTube videos and just see yeah see how complicated it is

1260
01:11:03,560 --> 01:11:07,820
But if you know, I'm just good. I got the I got the I got the extra cash lying around

1261
01:11:07,820 --> 01:11:12,240
I mean, it's gonna dip into my my savings, but just do it. Just gonna take care of yeah

1262
01:11:12,240 --> 01:11:18,940
And also I'm gonna need that blower for winter because I've been having to fucking defrost my mate my windows manually with my fucking

1263
01:11:18,940 --> 01:11:21,920
No, fuck that. Yeah, I live that life. Yeah

1264
01:11:23,620 --> 01:11:28,600
I'm always late for everything. So I'm just like I don't have time to defrost fuck this

1265
01:11:29,460 --> 01:11:31,460
driving my head out the window

1266
01:11:32,300 --> 01:11:35,700
So Casey you wanted to talk about the drunkest we've ever been

1267
01:11:35,700 --> 01:11:42,060
Why don't you start why don't I start so there's two times that could be the drunkest I've ever been but the one time that I

1268
01:11:42,060 --> 01:11:49,700
Throw up they threw up. I'll start with so I was I was playing call duty with our friend Casey

1269
01:11:49,700 --> 01:11:56,780
O'neill here. Oh, like flicker flake fucking alley Mac. Yeah, where's the frosted flake? Tony the tiger?

1270
01:11:57,500 --> 01:12:01,340
Where is this guy? What is he doing? They have the tiger?

1271
01:12:01,340 --> 01:12:07,620
They have the tiger. He came in here a couple times

1272
01:12:12,340 --> 01:12:18,220
So I love I was fucking I was drinking like vodka straight from the bottle and

1273
01:12:18,780 --> 01:12:22,060
Like I was having a good time and then like, you know, you're playing games

1274
01:12:22,060 --> 01:12:24,660
So you don't really think you don't really pay attention to how much you're drinking

1275
01:12:24,660 --> 01:12:30,660
I realized that two bottles are gone and I realized that I'm not drunk yet

1276
01:12:30,660 --> 01:12:33,700
So it's gonna hit me and it's gonna hit me fucking hard

1277
01:12:33,700 --> 01:12:40,440
And then I got to the point where we were playing call duty zombies and I was like fucking like I can't aim for shit

1278
01:12:40,440 --> 01:12:44,780
I can't see shit. I was saying some wild shit about

1279
01:12:45,540 --> 01:12:46,980
people

1280
01:12:46,980 --> 01:12:49,420
That I'm not gonna repeat on live air

1281
01:12:51,220 --> 01:12:55,120
That's something that's something for off the air that you'll you'll enjoy after

1282
01:12:55,120 --> 01:12:59,660
I didn't realize that day was actually the drunkest you've ever been

1283
01:13:00,080 --> 01:13:04,560
And then I had the one day where me and Alex McDonald it's always with Alex McDonald

1284
01:13:04,560 --> 01:13:08,960
It's always an alley Mac. I mean he identified himself as an alcoholic

1285
01:13:11,920 --> 01:13:15,360
Well, I'm a recovering alcoholic

1286
01:13:15,360 --> 01:13:20,280
I think he said he was a borderline alcohol a borderline alcohol. Yeah, he's a current

1287
01:13:20,920 --> 01:13:23,960
Occurred alcohol and he's like not on sir that actually

1288
01:13:25,200 --> 01:13:26,960
so

1289
01:13:26,960 --> 01:13:28,960
So we were we were at his house

1290
01:13:28,960 --> 01:13:34,260
And this was when he first got his his like first place with his like six roommates that he had

1291
01:13:34,960 --> 01:13:37,200
and I was just chilling and

1292
01:13:38,200 --> 01:13:43,000
You know, I was I was over there. It was like summertime and

1293
01:13:43,000 --> 01:13:48,800
We I brought over like two bottles of skull vodka a bottle of a bottle of

1294
01:13:49,720 --> 01:13:51,720
Captain Morgan private stock

1295
01:13:52,920 --> 01:13:57,480
Like we were we were fucking going hard and heavy shot for shot, you know

1296
01:13:58,320 --> 01:14:03,960
We went shot for shot killed to killed to skull vodka bottles and I started pounding the fucking

1297
01:14:04,800 --> 01:14:07,560
pounding the the Captain Morgan private stock and

1298
01:14:08,080 --> 01:14:12,380
It got to the point where I was staring at a wall and having a conversation with it

1299
01:14:12,380 --> 01:14:18,860
And the wall wasn't responding back. This was just alcohol. Yes, just alcohol like I was fucking gone

1300
01:14:19,860 --> 01:14:26,780
And then his roommate home and his roommate like started getting to an argument with his other roommate about not not doing the dishes

1301
01:14:26,780 --> 01:14:30,220
And I just go and they didn't know me at this point

1302
01:14:30,660 --> 01:14:35,380
That's her. I go. Hey, like who the fuck are you? I'm like, I'm alley max friend

1303
01:14:35,620 --> 01:14:41,100
I'm like what's going on guys like this guy doesn't do his fucking dishes. I did my fucking dishes. I'm like, hey

1304
01:14:41,100 --> 01:14:43,100
Hey, hey, hey

1305
01:14:43,340 --> 01:14:45,340
You do like the drug like hey

1306
01:14:45,620 --> 01:14:48,980
Hey you you listen. Hey listen

1307
01:14:49,500 --> 01:14:56,100
Hey listen, and I'm like and they're like what the fuck and I'm like I am so plastered right now. I

1308
01:14:56,860 --> 01:15:01,780
Don't even know what's going on and your voices are very loud. They're kind of freaking me out

1309
01:15:02,580 --> 01:15:04,340
Like what the fuck?

1310
01:15:04,340 --> 01:15:12,860
Like dude, I don't even know man, but listen, I'll do the dishes if you guys I'll just calm down

1311
01:15:13,100 --> 01:15:16,460
I'll do the dishes and then alley mac is just going

1312
01:15:19,380 --> 01:15:23,620
Like over there and I'm like, yeah, you know like alley mac what the fuck's wrong with your friend?

1313
01:15:23,620 --> 01:15:26,780
I'm like, ah, nothing's wrong with me, man. I'm doing fantastic

1314
01:15:27,380 --> 01:15:29,380
Okay, and then they're like

1315
01:15:29,380 --> 01:15:35,620
I'm gonna go to bed and I'm like you do that you guys both do that. So I fucking went over to a corner

1316
01:15:35,620 --> 01:15:41,060
I threw a blanket over my head and I curled up in a ball. I fell asleep until 5 a.m.

1317
01:15:41,060 --> 01:15:46,380
I woke up stone-cold sober. I cleaned the entire house and I left without saying a word to anybody

1318
01:15:46,380 --> 01:15:55,880
Yeah, yeah you have a story about the drunkest you've ever been oh yeah, well

1319
01:15:56,500 --> 01:15:58,660
Back I was at one of my exes

1320
01:15:59,460 --> 01:16:02,940
College dorms and it was like the first time I ever got drunk

1321
01:16:03,620 --> 01:16:05,620
drinking like vodka or something and

1322
01:16:06,380 --> 01:16:10,740
We're playing beer pong, but at one point I blacked out and when I woke up

1323
01:16:10,740 --> 01:16:15,340
I was standing in a stairwell and just pissing down the stairs

1324
01:16:15,340 --> 01:16:17,340
Oh

1325
01:16:19,260 --> 01:16:22,260
They heard the door drunk yeah

1326
01:16:23,420 --> 01:16:27,580
Couldn't find the bathroom. So I guess I was pissing down stairs and he poured in a storm my friend

1327
01:16:29,020 --> 01:16:32,540
The RD who's like the resident director of the building found me

1328
01:16:33,180 --> 01:16:36,120
And he's like where the hell is your room?

1329
01:16:36,120 --> 01:16:41,620
I'm like, I don't know because I could remember what was there. We just like walking around for a half hour

1330
01:16:41,620 --> 01:16:45,620
looking for a room and

1331
01:16:45,780 --> 01:16:49,500
I got back there and he's like, yeah, we're gonna have a meeting in the morning. I

1332
01:16:51,540 --> 01:16:54,540
Mean those get off my teeth cuz I didn't live there

1333
01:16:56,660 --> 01:16:58,660
We're gonna have a meeting like no

1334
01:17:01,220 --> 01:17:03,900
Another time I'll tell one real quick

1335
01:17:05,420 --> 01:17:06,620
So

1336
01:17:06,620 --> 01:17:09,420
One time I was partying with these Spanish people

1337
01:17:09,420 --> 01:17:14,780
Man, you know, hold on. Let me let me put some music on there in the background. Just so now Casey's got a guy

1338
01:17:16,380 --> 01:17:19,540
Wait, I was what are you doing? I got a

1339
01:17:20,300 --> 01:17:24,860
Turn on the recording for the track of Spanish. We want like Spanish guitar music

1340
01:17:24,860 --> 01:17:29,080
I could do it or Dante could the role how you spell that da NZA

1341
01:17:29,080 --> 01:17:44,920
Kud you are oh, oh

1342
01:17:45,960 --> 01:17:49,760
Fuck oh, this is like a music video. Yeah

1343
01:17:49,760 --> 01:17:56,640
So I'm in this basement party at the Spanish kids house right partying with these Spanish people

1344
01:17:56,640 --> 01:17:59,920
They just keep telling me have another beer another beer

1345
01:18:01,920 --> 01:18:08,520
I don't know 20 years old 1920. I just kept drinking. I kept drinking. I'm dancing

1346
01:18:08,520 --> 01:18:10,520
I'm dancing

1347
01:18:10,520 --> 01:18:12,520
I'm dancing

1348
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:14,520
I'm dancing

1349
01:18:14,520 --> 01:18:16,520
I'm dancing

1350
01:18:16,520 --> 01:18:18,520
I'm dancing

1351
01:18:18,520 --> 01:18:22,880
Drinking I'm dancing with these Spanish girls. This is great, right?

1352
01:18:23,400 --> 01:18:27,120
And I don't know when it hit me that I drank too much

1353
01:18:28,760 --> 01:18:34,480
But they said I sat down and I leaned against the wall and I looked at them

1354
01:18:35,360 --> 01:18:37,360
threw up

1355
01:18:39,400 --> 01:18:44,740
So these kids their parents like knew they were drinking but they didn't want like

1356
01:18:44,740 --> 01:18:50,300
They didn't want their parents to find a kid passed out. Yeah, so they're like, oh, well, we got to hide him some

1357
01:18:51,980 --> 01:18:55,740
They got this brilliant idea to hide me in my car

1358
01:18:56,620 --> 01:19:03,380
Like a quarter mile down the street. So they shoved me into their car brought me to my I had a Jeep Jeep Cherokee and

1359
01:19:04,940 --> 01:19:08,020
They got my keys out of my pocket all of the songs playing

1360
01:19:08,020 --> 01:19:11,020
Oh, yeah, it's high time. Okay?

1361
01:19:12,020 --> 01:19:16,180
They opened up my car got my key out of my pocket open my car and they shoved me in the back

1362
01:19:16,420 --> 01:19:20,420
Which is your trunk? They shoved me in the in the back seat of the car

1363
01:19:20,940 --> 01:19:23,500
And left me there great friends. Thanks guys

1364
01:19:24,100 --> 01:19:26,580
So the neighbor across the street

1365
01:19:27,060 --> 01:19:33,180
Like dude, did you just dump a body car the cops because she just saw a bunch of kids put a body in the back

1366
01:19:33,180 --> 01:19:38,740
I have a very vague memory

1367
01:19:39,980 --> 01:19:42,300
There wasn't this music playing still but keep it going

1368
01:19:43,420 --> 01:19:45,420
It's that's the theme for the story

1369
01:19:47,700 --> 01:19:50,480
Vague memory of real chatter

1370
01:19:52,460 --> 01:19:54,460
Coming through the back

1371
01:19:54,820 --> 01:19:56,460
Looking in

1372
01:19:56,460 --> 01:19:58,460
That's all I really remember

1373
01:19:58,460 --> 01:20:05,540
But what happened is the police smashed my back window out Jesus open my door and

1374
01:20:06,540 --> 01:20:09,380
Put me in the back of a green and white ambulance

1375
01:20:12,780 --> 01:20:16,180
Talk about what ambulance company now, this is what you're hearing though

1376
01:20:17,260 --> 01:20:18,380
Yeah

1377
01:20:18,380 --> 01:20:19,900
Yeah

1378
01:20:19,900 --> 01:20:28,980
Yeah, and so they brought me to a hospital. I'm not gonna say the name of the hospital and Schenectady and

1379
01:20:29,540 --> 01:20:32,540
I remember the first thing I actually remember is

1380
01:20:33,860 --> 01:20:37,660
The cop saying you got a little sick on yourself, bud

1381
01:20:40,420 --> 01:20:43,980
When I worked at this ambulance company, I remember seeing this cop all the time

1382
01:20:43,980 --> 01:20:50,480
But uh, yeah, so it's green and white, you know, I let it wear off and

1383
01:20:51,000 --> 01:20:54,580
I slept it off get up in the morning get my stuff back and

1384
01:20:55,980 --> 01:21:01,580
Get back to my car and I bought one. I didn't have my clothes. So I'm in a hospital gun

1385
01:21:02,420 --> 01:21:04,420
so I get back to my car and

1386
01:21:04,700 --> 01:21:09,540
The windows all smashed out just sitting there and I'm like what the fuck happened

1387
01:21:09,540 --> 01:21:15,340
Dude, and I look behind me and I look across the street and there's a lady that called the cops in her window

1388
01:21:15,340 --> 01:21:17,940
And she literally went like this and like disappear

1389
01:21:25,140 --> 01:21:27,980
I had to go to a junkyard and get a new window for my car

1390
01:21:29,060 --> 01:21:31,060
Don't party with Spanish people

1391
01:21:31,420 --> 01:21:33,420
They will lead you down a bad path

1392
01:21:33,700 --> 01:21:38,120
They are partiers. They party hard. They can hold their alcohol better than you

1393
01:21:38,120 --> 01:21:44,920
Yeah, that's like when Ali Mack got pissed drunk at that one stogie night. Oh, yeah, and he got in the car and he tried

1394
01:21:48,200 --> 01:21:50,200
Where he was crying in the tree house

1395
01:21:54,360 --> 01:21:56,360
I'll just tell this story cuz the flake is

1396
01:21:58,960 --> 01:22:01,240
So if he could get his ass here so

1397
01:22:01,840 --> 01:22:06,280
So we were we were out there, you know having a stogie, you know around the fire

1398
01:22:06,280 --> 01:22:10,120
Ali Mack was getting belligerently drunk like he always does

1399
01:22:11,280 --> 01:22:18,960
Shoe in my woods. Yeah, he threw his he threw his van and vans and you're in your woods and we still haven't found the singular van

1400
01:22:19,200 --> 01:22:22,560
It's just gone like it's one with the trees now

1401
01:22:24,840 --> 01:22:28,800
Like we were sitting there and then he goes I'm like, alright

1402
01:22:29,360 --> 01:22:34,680
Casey goes it's time to go home everybody. I'm like I'm stone-cold sober. I didn't drink anything

1403
01:22:34,680 --> 01:22:39,120
So I'm like whatever and then fucking Ali Max like I'm not going home

1404
01:22:41,880 --> 01:22:43,880
Just like

1405
01:22:44,320 --> 01:22:47,960
I'm like, come on Ali Mack. Let's go. I'll drive you home. He's like, I'm not going

1406
01:22:49,000 --> 01:22:54,880
And he's just I'm like, come on man. Let's let's not do this right now. He jumps up into the fucking tree house

1407
01:22:54,880 --> 01:22:56,880
He's like I'm not coming out

1408
01:22:58,840 --> 01:23:02,560
Casey you're both like I like come on man get out of tree house. He's like no

1409
01:23:02,560 --> 01:23:03,760
No

1410
01:23:03,760 --> 01:23:08,720
And he says like, you know going on about how we hate him and shit and we're like, nah, dude, we don't hate you

1411
01:23:09,360 --> 01:23:14,440
We're trying to help you like no man. You guys hate me. You guys hate me, man

1412
01:23:14,440 --> 01:23:17,440
This is also when he was a fucking incel as of for three years

1413
01:23:18,080 --> 01:23:22,480
So three years. Yeah, you had three year dry spell. That's a drought

1414
01:23:26,600 --> 01:23:29,600
So I like we were arguing back and forth with them

1415
01:23:29,600 --> 01:23:34,640
Eventually, I got sick of it. I climbed up in the tree house and threw him out

1416
01:23:35,720 --> 01:23:41,200
And then he's just like I'm gonna fight you on my alley Mac. You wouldn't fight me sober. You're not gonna fight me now

1417
01:23:42,360 --> 01:23:46,980
He's like, yeah, I will and I go like I squared off. He's like, oh no, I won't

1418
01:23:48,640 --> 01:23:53,380
Let's get you to my fucking car and he's just like, okay, and I'm like you throw up in my car

1419
01:23:53,380 --> 01:23:59,680
I swear to God I'm gonna throw you out the side of the road. He's like me. Yeah, I

1420
01:23:59,720 --> 01:24:04,160
fucking got in my car and he's just like left in me and I'm like

1421
01:24:08,920 --> 01:24:14,180
Like I'm bringing you always like left in man, I'm gonna I owe you one

1422
01:24:15,360 --> 01:24:17,360
Which if you're listening

1423
01:24:17,360 --> 01:24:22,960
Only one and we brought him back to his house or I brought him back to his house

1424
01:24:22,960 --> 01:24:25,200
But on the way he just kept on fucking

1425
01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:28,960
Going to sleep and putting his head on my shoulder and I kept pushing him

1426
01:24:29,360 --> 01:24:35,040
Pushing him off me and smash his head against the window and he'd wake up for like two seconds and immediately go

1427
01:24:38,000 --> 01:24:40,000
So I'm like get the fuck off me

1428
01:24:40,400 --> 01:24:42,000
And he's like, yeah, man

1429
01:24:42,000 --> 01:24:48,120
So we got out and we got to his house and I'm like, alright, man, let's let's get you inside and he's just like

1430
01:24:48,960 --> 01:24:52,080
No, and I'm like, we're gonna get you to fuck inside

1431
01:24:52,160 --> 01:24:54,400
You're not gonna be in my fucking car anymore

1432
01:24:54,400 --> 01:24:59,120
and I'm gonna get you to your fucking bedroom and you're gonna go to sleep and you're gonna sleep this shit off and it's like

1433
01:25:00,080 --> 01:25:04,360
Okay, so I go out around the side door. He smacks his head off the top of my car

1434
01:25:05,280 --> 01:25:09,360
And lands in a fucking gunner. So I have to lift him up out of the fucking gutter

1435
01:25:09,360 --> 01:25:14,760
And carry him like carry like fucking sold like wounded soldiers and fucking D-day

1436
01:25:14,760 --> 01:25:20,340
I'm fucking carrying his ass on my fucking arm and then we get him inside. He fumbles with his keys

1437
01:25:20,340 --> 01:25:26,040
I pick up his keys. I shove it in the lock open it up and then he binds you he has one shoe and

1438
01:25:28,000 --> 01:25:30,000
He's like he's like

1439
01:25:30,560 --> 01:25:32,560
So he walks up his fucking stairs

1440
01:25:33,000 --> 01:25:35,480
closes his fucking door and locks it and

1441
01:25:35,480 --> 01:25:42,080
That's the last we solve them for 14 hours. Yeah, so I was also super drunk that night and I didn't I

1442
01:25:42,600 --> 01:25:46,160
He could have just slept on my couch, but I was like in no position to

1443
01:25:47,000 --> 01:25:50,680
To check on them or anything. So I figured I thought his roommates were home

1444
01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:54,280
So I wanted him to go home and and like sleep it off with his roommates

1445
01:25:54,280 --> 01:25:58,240
But he's like first of all my roommates. Nobody's here and you left me home alone

1446
01:25:59,360 --> 01:26:03,240
So give a fuck about me. I could be dead for three days and I wouldn't check on me

1447
01:26:03,240 --> 01:26:06,120
See that's really why for the most part I stopped drinking

1448
01:26:06,680 --> 01:26:13,200
Because I just got sick of having stories like that like just embarrassing myself like not that he embarrassed himself

1449
01:26:13,200 --> 01:26:20,160
But maybe no he embarrassed himself dude and then like Halloween the the next Halloween he got even worse

1450
01:26:20,680 --> 01:26:22,680
I'll I'll imagine he punched me

1451
01:26:23,320 --> 01:26:23,720
Really?

1452
01:26:23,720 --> 01:26:29,520
He's a drunk punch, you know, but then I sober punched him and he was like I think that sobered him up

1453
01:26:29,520 --> 01:26:34,560
Because like I was a boxer for 13 years you guys you guys know that and like he got me with like a drunk punch

1454
01:26:34,560 --> 01:26:39,440
Cuz I wasn't even expecting it. So I fucking set up fucking stance and I fucking

1455
01:26:39,960 --> 01:26:44,240
F***ed him and he's like like I think like he was fucking plastered boom sober

1456
01:26:47,240 --> 01:26:49,240
I knocked the drunk

1457
01:26:50,240 --> 01:26:52,240
He got so fucking drunk on that

1458
01:26:52,800 --> 01:26:58,400
He got he started getting combative and we were trying to just get him to get him to get him to get him to get him to get

1459
01:26:58,400 --> 01:27:02,840
And we were trying to just get him into bed and there was like me and three other people

1460
01:27:02,840 --> 01:27:07,160
there's like this big guy and me this like skinny guy another one of his friends and

1461
01:27:07,440 --> 01:27:12,880
And this girl all trying to put him in the bed and the girl I forgot her name the girls

1462
01:27:12,880 --> 01:27:14,880
She's trying to fuck him. It's like calm down

1463
01:27:17,640 --> 01:27:24,280
Being this big another big dude or fucking dragging him up the stairs and he's trying to throw himself down the stairs

1464
01:27:24,280 --> 01:27:32,600
We're trying to drag him in the bed and so he like threw himself on the stairs like three times

1465
01:27:41,960 --> 01:27:45,640
I feel like everybody needs to go through like a phase where they drink a lot

1466
01:27:46,280 --> 01:27:48,040
Like just to get it out of their system

1467
01:27:48,040 --> 01:27:53,160
Maybe not always but I just turned 21 and I was fucking getting hammered all the time

1468
01:27:53,160 --> 01:27:58,680
I don't I I I haven't been like actually drunk in like probably like a year and a half at this point

1469
01:27:58,680 --> 01:28:05,440
Yeah, it loses its yeah, it should I hate I hate being drunk. The only thing about being drunk

1470
01:28:05,440 --> 01:28:09,120
That's great. Is the food tastes so much better it does

1471
01:28:09,120 --> 01:28:14,680
Yeah, like I wish there was a way I could get the food to taste like it tastes when I'm drunk

1472
01:28:15,200 --> 01:28:18,800
Without being drunk. Yeah, like that'd be fucking lit

1473
01:28:19,320 --> 01:28:21,320
What is that?

1474
01:28:21,320 --> 01:28:25,480
I think your dopamine levels are just up. Everything's up. Yeah, everything's up

1475
01:28:25,480 --> 01:28:31,640
So it's just like it just enhances the flavor. My teeth get numb when I drink. That's weird. You ever get that? No, no

1476
01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:33,640
No, yeah

1477
01:28:33,640 --> 01:28:38,800
Teeth get numb and that's how I know. So I'll tell time where I blacked out. This is when I was fucking a

1478
01:28:39,480 --> 01:28:41,920
Totally legal age still in high school

1479
01:28:44,040 --> 01:28:46,040
But um, I

1480
01:28:46,040 --> 01:28:52,920
Was definitely legal drinking age and I wasn't at an illegal underage drinking party with my friends for homecoming

1481
01:28:53,880 --> 01:29:00,640
The statute of limitations is up for that one buddy. So I was uh, I was you know, we were there and

1482
01:29:01,760 --> 01:29:05,480
There was like an abandoned factory in my town the same one that I got arrested in actually

1483
01:29:06,160 --> 01:29:08,760
How many fucking things did you do at this abandoned factory?

1484
01:29:09,600 --> 01:29:15,160
Dude, it's it was it was the hub. I bet he did things in that abandoned factory that you did in libraries

1485
01:29:15,160 --> 01:29:17,160
You did shit with Anne Frank in that factory

1486
01:29:17,160 --> 01:29:19,160
Shut the fuck up man, ours ten!

1487
01:29:19,160 --> 01:29:23,160
He was fucking grabbing holocaust documentaries

1488
01:29:25,440 --> 01:29:29,840
So I was I was at that and it was homecoming night and I was the captain of the football team

1489
01:29:29,840 --> 01:29:33,360
You know, I had to go like it was like one of the things that like you had to do

1490
01:29:33,720 --> 01:29:38,700
So I was there and I never went to parties like I was like a straight-edge kid even though I got arrested

1491
01:29:38,700 --> 01:29:45,180
But like I I tried my best not to be like a shithead, but I you know had shithead moments

1492
01:29:45,180 --> 01:29:51,300
Like we all do but this is like my first time ever touching alcohol and I was like fucking 17 years old and

1493
01:29:52,780 --> 01:29:54,780
No, I was 21 years old

1494
01:29:54,780 --> 01:30:00,500
So we were having a fire in this abandoned factory and like my buddies were like doing shit and

1495
01:30:02,140 --> 01:30:09,260
My buddy had the nickname captain hook because he sent like dick pics to every girl in the school and he had a curved dick

1496
01:30:11,380 --> 01:30:13,380
So he was like

1497
01:30:14,380 --> 01:30:16,380
Fucking

1498
01:30:16,380 --> 01:30:18,380
Fucking

1499
01:30:18,380 --> 01:30:20,380
Fucking

1500
01:30:20,380 --> 01:30:22,380
Fucking

1501
01:30:22,380 --> 01:30:24,380
Fucking

1502
01:30:24,380 --> 01:30:26,380
Fucking

1503
01:30:26,380 --> 01:30:28,380
Fucking

1504
01:30:28,380 --> 01:30:30,380
Fucking

1505
01:30:30,380 --> 01:30:32,380
Fucking

1506
01:30:32,380 --> 01:30:34,380
Fucking

1507
01:30:34,380 --> 01:30:36,380
Fucking

1508
01:30:36,380 --> 01:30:40,540
So he was like plastered Grieman. I'm captain hook motherfucker

1509
01:30:41,660 --> 01:30:46,540
He was proud of it. Oh, yeah good for him. Yeah, he's like, yeah, ha mate

1510
01:30:46,540 --> 01:30:53,380
He's I'm captain hook fucking smacking his fucking fucking showing his dick off to anybody who would look at it and like

1511
01:30:53,380 --> 01:30:55,380
we're like whatever man and

1512
01:30:56,740 --> 01:30:59,300
So I'm getting drunk and I'm like, I don't know how to get drunk

1513
01:30:59,300 --> 01:31:02,420
So I'm just gonna drink fucking fireball like the story makes me want a beer

1514
01:31:02,780 --> 01:31:07,420
Yeah, so like, you know every 17 year old you're drinking fucking fireball. You want one?

1515
01:31:07,820 --> 01:31:09,820
You want one? Yeah

1516
01:31:09,900 --> 01:31:13,340
But like, you know, 17 year old fireball is your alcohol of choice

1517
01:31:13,660 --> 01:31:20,460
Yeah, so I was I was pounding down some fireball and I didn't know how to pace myself. So I was just fucking slamming it

1518
01:31:20,460 --> 01:31:28,060
And you know, there's a girl there that I found really attractive. I tried to hit on her. Didn't it work made me drink more

1519
01:31:29,580 --> 01:31:31,580
then

1520
01:31:32,620 --> 01:31:38,780
Things started going off the rails at this point my buddy Colin fucking started punching the ground

1521
01:31:40,380 --> 01:31:45,500
Like literally just kept on punching the soft ground until his fucking arm was like all the way in the dirt

1522
01:31:46,860 --> 01:31:49,340
That has nothing to do with the story. I just thought it was an interesting thing

1523
01:31:49,340 --> 01:31:51,340
That's very interesting

1524
01:31:52,060 --> 01:31:56,620
My one buddy climbed up to the rafters and he was like hanging off the rafters of this abandoned factory

1525
01:31:56,620 --> 01:32:01,020
That was you know, like 20 feet up and I and I'm like, he probably shouldn't have been up there

1526
01:32:01,020 --> 01:32:03,980
But you know, we all thought it was hilarious and then

1527
01:32:05,180 --> 01:32:09,820
Little things started coming up. I started seeing this a little black around my vision and I'm like

1528
01:32:10,380 --> 01:32:13,980
What the fuck's that and then the black started coming in

1529
01:32:13,980 --> 01:32:19,260
It started coming in it started coming in and I said I kept on like fighting it and like it would go out a little bit

1530
01:32:19,260 --> 01:32:24,620
And then it started coming back in and like the tunnel vision started going and then eventually this went

1531
01:32:26,300 --> 01:32:28,300
And I woke up

1532
01:32:29,980 --> 01:32:31,980
And I woke up in my bedroom

1533
01:32:33,100 --> 01:32:38,300
And my window was open so my parents never knew I was gone

1534
01:32:38,780 --> 01:32:42,620
But the things that happened when my brother was gone

1535
01:32:42,620 --> 01:32:47,100
And when my brain went sleepy time, but my body said it's party time

1536
01:32:48,140 --> 01:32:51,100
were interesting to say the least I uh

1537
01:32:52,360 --> 01:32:55,820
Apparently I had burns on my hand too and I was missing

1538
01:32:56,940 --> 01:33:01,980
You know the lower half of my clothing but not like I I had underwear on like I wasn't like, you know

1539
01:33:02,060 --> 01:33:06,540
Just dick balling out but um, I like, you know, like second degrees on my hand

1540
01:33:06,540 --> 01:33:10,300
Not like serious second degrees, but like ones that he had to keep popping the blisters on and shit

1541
01:33:10,300 --> 01:33:15,820
So apparently when I fucking blacked out everybody said that I just fucking stared at people

1542
01:33:16,700 --> 01:33:18,300
and i'm like

1543
01:33:18,300 --> 01:33:19,340
Hey

1544
01:33:19,340 --> 01:33:22,380
You're like dude, are you all right? I'm like, i'm just feeling great

1545
01:33:22,940 --> 01:33:26,460
And they said like I like looked like I was fucking evil. I'm like, I feel fantastic

1546
01:33:27,020 --> 01:33:30,380
But you weren't even there. I wasn't there like that was your alternate

1547
01:33:30,380 --> 01:33:39,820
Personality finally that asshole's out of the room and i've got a chance to control this body. So I fucking sprinted to the fire

1548
01:33:40,620 --> 01:33:45,660
Oh shit, and I lifted up a log and I went over to my buddy who was punching the ground

1549
01:33:45,740 --> 01:33:51,500
I threw flaming logs at him screaming. I'm donkey kong motherfucker jump like mario, bitch

1550
01:33:51,740 --> 01:33:57,740
And i'm throwing fire logs at him just fucking yeeting fire logs at him and everybody's like, you know, what the fuck lee

1551
01:33:57,740 --> 01:34:01,580
And I turned around I go bye bye and I run into the dark woods

1552
01:34:03,180 --> 01:34:05,740
I don't know what the fuck happened because never catch me

1553
01:34:06,700 --> 01:34:10,700
I was my house was two miles away from that. I don't know what happened between

1554
01:34:11,340 --> 01:34:16,300
There and my house. Damn dude. I got a fucking story like that

1555
01:34:17,180 --> 01:34:18,220
um

1556
01:34:18,220 --> 01:34:19,580
There's this banger

1557
01:34:19,580 --> 01:34:25,100
Did I tell the one about how I got the fiddler on the roof the play canceled at school because I got no

1558
01:34:25,500 --> 01:34:27,420
trip, all right

1559
01:34:27,420 --> 01:34:29,420
I'll just i'll make these quick

1560
01:34:29,660 --> 01:34:34,300
Um, i'll tell them both so we'll start with the one where I got the field trip canceled

1561
01:34:34,860 --> 01:34:36,140
so

1562
01:34:36,140 --> 01:34:38,880
I uh, we we went on a field trip to Salem, Massachusetts

1563
01:34:39,820 --> 01:34:42,940
In 10th grade. All right. Yeah, and uh, I was like man

1564
01:34:43,500 --> 01:34:46,060
I'm gonna make this field trip fun, bro

1565
01:34:46,940 --> 01:34:52,140
So I went into my parents cabinet and I took what little bit of vodka that they had

1566
01:34:52,780 --> 01:34:55,100
And I poured it in a gatorade

1567
01:34:55,100 --> 01:34:57,100
So, um

1568
01:34:58,140 --> 01:35:02,540
Like mix it or just put fucking pure vodka in it. I put pure vodka in it. Yeah

1569
01:35:03,100 --> 01:35:04,140
um

1570
01:35:04,140 --> 01:35:05,580
so

1571
01:35:05,580 --> 01:35:07,260
On this field trip

1572
01:35:07,260 --> 01:35:11,180
I started sipping on this gatorade, right? It was actually a good idea

1573
01:35:11,340 --> 01:35:14,700
Like I should probably do that like more often stuff like that

1574
01:35:15,340 --> 01:35:16,940
just just to make

1575
01:35:16,940 --> 01:35:18,940
situations more palatable, but

1576
01:35:19,420 --> 01:35:21,420
I got hammered

1577
01:35:21,420 --> 01:35:26,460
And I we were on a wade tour bus one of those big tour buses

1578
01:35:26,940 --> 01:35:29,660
And there's this girl I liked in like sixth grade

1579
01:35:30,220 --> 01:35:31,100
and

1580
01:35:31,100 --> 01:35:33,020
I'm sitting on her lap

1581
01:35:33,020 --> 01:35:35,020
And i'm saying to her i'm like listen

1582
01:35:35,660 --> 01:35:40,960
My friend has also liked you since sixth grade. I said you give him what he wants

1583
01:35:43,500 --> 01:35:45,820
One of the parents is like, yeah, there's something not right

1584
01:35:45,820 --> 01:35:50,780
There's been something's going on. He's sitting on her lap like he's demanding that she

1585
01:35:51,580 --> 01:35:53,580
gives his friend what he wants

1586
01:35:53,660 --> 01:35:54,780
so

1587
01:35:54,780 --> 01:36:02,460
So one of the teachers comes up and he's like, hey dan, what are you drinking there? Right grabs my gatorade sniffs it takes a swig of it

1588
01:36:03,420 --> 01:36:07,420
And he goes, all right everybody who drinks to the front of the bus

1589
01:36:07,420 --> 01:36:15,020
And so a bunch of the people that I had planned like drinking with were people that were in the school play and

1590
01:36:16,860 --> 01:36:17,900
So

1591
01:36:17,900 --> 01:36:21,020
They went to the front of the bus gave them their drinks and they got jammed up, right?

1592
01:36:21,340 --> 01:36:22,940
They all got suspended

1593
01:36:22,940 --> 01:36:28,860
And since they were in the school play they had nobody to do since they got suspended they had nobody to do feather on the roof

1594
01:36:29,660 --> 01:36:34,380
I went to this rinky-dink little school you fucking anti-semitic piece of shit. Yeah

1595
01:36:34,380 --> 01:36:38,140
You fucking you you you're the nazis in my holocaust

1596
01:36:39,340 --> 01:36:45,020
So it made like the school newspaper about underage drinking and I kept the article. I thought it was hilarious

1597
01:36:45,820 --> 01:36:48,140
He said I was never allowed to go on a field trip again

1598
01:36:49,180 --> 01:36:53,180
Um, oh and then like this is the problem like I was like fuck i'm in trouble

1599
01:36:53,180 --> 01:36:57,500
So i'll just play the victim right and I so I pretended I was like way more drunk than I was

1600
01:36:57,820 --> 01:37:01,180
And they're like, oh my god, we gotta get this kid to a hospital

1601
01:37:01,180 --> 01:37:04,700
Yeah, way toward bus drivers like oh, I gotta find one. Where do I go?

1602
01:37:06,060 --> 01:37:11,500
And i'm like in the front like just like pretending i'm so out of it, but I wasn't I wasn't that drunk I was just

1603
01:37:12,700 --> 01:37:14,700
So anyway, there was another story

1604
01:37:15,260 --> 01:37:17,260
There's this fucking banger in high school

1605
01:37:17,580 --> 01:37:20,300
Uh, one of the best high school parties that we had

1606
01:37:21,020 --> 01:37:23,020
And uh, it was at my buddy's house

1607
01:37:23,660 --> 01:37:29,820
And my one friend showed up with this pickup truck that he had chopped the roof off of right?

1608
01:37:29,820 --> 01:37:35,100
Just like with a saw some hillbilly shit real hillbilly shit. Yeah, so it was like a convertible pickup truck

1609
01:37:36,060 --> 01:37:38,060
duct tape like over the um

1610
01:37:38,540 --> 01:37:40,540
Over the like the sharp metal, right?

1611
01:37:41,020 --> 01:37:45,100
So he just started doing donuts in his yard, right?

1612
01:37:45,260 --> 01:37:49,040
And i'm in the passenger seat and i'm just like flashing everybody. I'm like

1613
01:37:52,380 --> 01:37:55,500
And he's going around in circles and every once in a while on the headlights

1614
01:37:55,500 --> 01:38:00,460
I would see my one buddy whose house it was going like this like no no no

1615
01:38:01,340 --> 01:38:03,660
It was just like, you know every time you'd spin around

1616
01:38:04,780 --> 01:38:06,780
You'd see him real quick

1617
01:38:09,020 --> 01:38:12,860
So dude, I just made a fucking mess of this kid's house

1618
01:38:13,260 --> 01:38:15,740
I like went into the kitchen and I found cookie crisp

1619
01:38:16,300 --> 01:38:20,300
On top of the fridge and I just started fucking eating it out of the box, right?

1620
01:38:20,700 --> 01:38:24,540
And i'm like, oh well, I don't want to get lost. I gotta find my way back, right?

1621
01:38:24,540 --> 01:38:27,100
So I started making a trail of cookie crisps through the house

1622
01:38:28,300 --> 01:38:31,660
Grab the box of donuts and I was eating the fucking donuts

1623
01:38:32,220 --> 01:38:38,060
Open the bathroom door and there's a super super hot chick from high school sitting on the toilet, right?

1624
01:38:38,540 --> 01:38:40,540
I took one of the powdered donuts

1625
01:38:40,540 --> 01:38:44,620
You hit her square in the face

1626
01:38:57,420 --> 01:38:59,340
Anyway, I ended up

1627
01:38:59,340 --> 01:39:04,300
Going with my buddy home. He was hammered and I sat in the back of his pickup truck

1628
01:39:04,380 --> 01:39:08,940
The one who had the chop top truck and i'm sitting in the back and i'm like dude

1629
01:39:08,940 --> 01:39:15,180
Dude, Kyle bro, slow down for me, bro. You're going too fast, dude

1630
01:39:15,820 --> 01:39:17,340
Slow down, dude

1631
01:39:17,340 --> 01:39:20,540
He's like i'm doing 30 miles an hour, Dan

1632
01:39:21,900 --> 01:39:23,900
Just slow it down, bro

1633
01:39:24,300 --> 01:39:25,420
so

1634
01:39:25,420 --> 01:39:28,460
Anyway, we get back to his house and this is the first time I ever smoked weed

1635
01:39:29,100 --> 01:39:30,060
um

1636
01:39:30,060 --> 01:39:30,860
and

1637
01:39:30,860 --> 01:39:32,860
Allegedly got me smoked up

1638
01:39:33,660 --> 01:39:36,140
And I fucking vomited dude, do you agree now?

1639
01:39:36,140 --> 01:39:42,380
I don't think I greened out. I just I throw up all over his fucking kitchen and he's like bro

1640
01:39:43,340 --> 01:39:45,500
dude

1641
01:39:45,500 --> 01:39:50,540
I'm gonna have to kick you out bro. And it wasn't that I threw up. I just kept spitting on his floor after that

1642
01:39:54,780 --> 01:39:58,940
He's like dude, you gotta stop spitting i'm gonna have to kick you out dude and he's high and drunk and

1643
01:39:59,660 --> 01:40:01,660
So I just said

1644
01:40:01,820 --> 01:40:03,820
I i'm not gonna stop spitting bro

1645
01:40:03,820 --> 01:40:09,340
I just spit on his fucking floor again. He's like, all right, dude, i'm kicking you out bro. You gotta dude you gotta go

1646
01:40:09,820 --> 01:40:11,820
so

1647
01:40:11,900 --> 01:40:13,580
Me outside

1648
01:40:13,580 --> 01:40:19,100
Since my shirt was covered in vomit. I didn't have a shirt on and then he gave me this fucking denim jacket

1649
01:40:20,780 --> 01:40:23,340
Mind you it's like fucking three in the morning, right?

1650
01:40:23,660 --> 01:40:28,860
So I got this denim jacket on and it's like a stripper in a fucking old town, dude

1651
01:40:29,180 --> 01:40:31,180
Yeah, I got this denim jacket on backwards

1652
01:40:31,180 --> 01:40:34,460
right, so the open part is in the back and

1653
01:40:35,260 --> 01:40:36,700
piss drunk

1654
01:40:36,700 --> 01:40:40,620
And there is this girl that I liked in high school

1655
01:40:40,700 --> 01:40:46,140
She was adorable bro, and she liked me and everybody's like everybody thought we had like a thing going on

1656
01:40:46,620 --> 01:40:50,300
Right, which it was like we kind of did but it was like it never like went into anything

1657
01:40:50,780 --> 01:40:51,660
but

1658
01:40:51,660 --> 01:40:53,820
It well actually like she liked me

1659
01:40:54,540 --> 01:40:55,580
and then

1660
01:40:55,580 --> 01:40:57,580
When I started to like her she didn't like me anymore

1661
01:40:57,580 --> 01:41:03,740
Wow, we like missed each other, you know, but this is why because she's he was like he

1662
01:41:04,360 --> 01:41:09,260
Videotaped this right and I thought for years i'm like this fucking video is gonna get out and it's gonna ruin my life

1663
01:41:09,980 --> 01:41:11,980
Like I had some future

1664
01:41:14,060 --> 01:41:15,660
But he

1665
01:41:15,660 --> 01:41:20,540
Videotaped me and he's like dude. What do you think a sammy p dude?

1666
01:41:20,540 --> 01:41:25,420
She's fat oh

1667
01:41:27,820 --> 01:41:35,180
Man because she you know, she she's like she's a little bigger, but she lost some weight. She got fucking fine, bro

1668
01:41:35,500 --> 01:41:39,100
God damn. She was a babe. So anyway, I fucked up

1669
01:41:39,980 --> 01:41:45,100
So he's like, all right, dude, you gotta go dude. You gotta get out. You gotta go bro, right?

1670
01:41:45,820 --> 01:41:47,820
Sent me off into the darkness

1671
01:41:47,820 --> 01:41:53,660
I had three in the morning with only a fucking denim jacket denim jacket on backwards piss drunk

1672
01:41:54,220 --> 01:41:59,260
So i'm like, i'm just gonna start fucking walking. I'm just gonna start finally home

1673
01:41:59,340 --> 01:42:04,220
I live about five miles from here. I don't figure out how to get home. So i'm fucking walking dude

1674
01:42:05,020 --> 01:42:07,020
And I fucking fell in a ditch

1675
01:42:07,020 --> 01:42:08,140
right

1676
01:42:08,140 --> 01:42:10,460
Get up out of the ditch, right? Just keep going

1677
01:42:10,460 --> 01:42:17,420
And I don't know why the fuck I did this but I decided that I was gonna take a nap in a car

1678
01:42:18,140 --> 01:42:20,140
That wasn't my car

1679
01:42:20,940 --> 01:42:25,900
I saw this car like you know some people on their garage. They have like a really blight bright fluorescent light

1680
01:42:25,980 --> 01:42:30,860
Yeah, this garage had like one of those and I just saw this car sitting underneath it and I was like, oh

1681
01:42:30,940 --> 01:42:36,060
Well, fuck it and went up and it was opened in front of somebody's house and I slept in their fucking car

1682
01:42:36,140 --> 01:42:38,220
How many cars have you slept in when you were drunk?

1683
01:42:38,220 --> 01:42:40,700
I I mean that's the most comfortable place

1684
01:42:41,260 --> 01:42:43,020
so um

1685
01:42:43,020 --> 01:42:47,900
Anyway, I slept in that car for like, I don't know maybe like an hour. This is like four o'clock in the morning

1686
01:42:48,540 --> 01:42:51,820
So I kept walking. What would you have done if you just woke up in like another area?

1687
01:42:51,900 --> 01:42:56,860
Like he's at work or some shit. Dude, it's so dangerous. What if somebody came out with a fucking gun?

1688
01:42:57,500 --> 01:42:59,500
so um

1689
01:42:59,580 --> 01:43:02,300
Yeah, so i'm like i'm just gonna keep walking so I kept walking

1690
01:43:02,300 --> 01:43:09,020
And and I realized after walking for it was like, I don't know two hours now that I had been walking the wrong way this entire time

1691
01:43:09,580 --> 01:43:10,540
so

1692
01:43:10,540 --> 01:43:16,060
I'm like fuck because I just sobered up enough to be like wait a second. My fucking school bus comes this way

1693
01:43:16,700 --> 01:43:18,380
I'm like, oh

1694
01:43:18,380 --> 01:43:25,660
Fuck dude. I walked the wrong way. And meanwhile, this is out in the country like dude. It's terrifying walking in the country at night

1695
01:43:25,980 --> 01:43:27,580
I'm in the middle of nowhere

1696
01:43:27,580 --> 01:43:32,700
You know, I just like I just said fuck it. I'm just gonna walk. I was like not afraid at all

1697
01:43:32,780 --> 01:43:34,780
but um, so finally

1698
01:43:35,420 --> 01:43:38,940
it was uh, it was like seven in the morning and I made it to

1699
01:43:39,820 --> 01:43:45,180
Within two miles of my house and I was fucking one. It was freezing that night

1700
01:43:45,820 --> 01:43:48,060
And I was just like so fucking cold

1701
01:43:48,620 --> 01:43:51,420
And I was just worn out from just walking all night

1702
01:43:52,060 --> 01:43:56,140
And the kid who had originally brought me to the party I snuck out of my house, right?

1703
01:43:56,140 --> 01:44:01,500
So it's daylight now. It's like six or seven in the morning. The kid who originally brought me to the party

1704
01:44:02,380 --> 01:44:04,380
drove by me

1705
01:44:04,780 --> 01:44:07,340
20 right and he drives by and then

1706
01:44:09,180 --> 01:44:16,220
Slams on the brakes throws it in reverse and he backs up and he's like, okay, I'm not gonna lie. I was crying

1707
01:44:18,620 --> 01:44:20,620
He's like Dan

1708
01:44:20,620 --> 01:44:30,300
And I'm like, bro, can you give me a fucking ride home bro? So he's like what the fuck happened to you?

1709
01:44:32,700 --> 01:44:34,700
It's a long story

1710
01:44:34,700 --> 01:44:35,660
so

1711
01:44:35,660 --> 01:44:37,340
He brought me home

1712
01:44:37,340 --> 01:44:42,300
Snuck back in my window now. It's like I don't know eight o'clock in the morning. I got an hour's sleep

1713
01:44:42,940 --> 01:44:45,100
And then my mom woke me up for church

1714
01:44:45,100 --> 01:44:50,940
My legs are covered in blood for falling in the ditch sucking some random person's car first time I smoked weed

1715
01:44:51,660 --> 01:44:53,660
Now I gotta go, you know go to church

1716
01:44:54,700 --> 01:44:56,700
Sorry if that was that was a long story

1717
01:44:57,420 --> 01:45:01,980
That was wonderful. Yeah, it was wonderful. That's why I don't drink anymore stuff like that

1718
01:45:02,700 --> 01:45:07,820
Did I ever tell you about my my crazy ex-girlfriend the russian one story on the on the air?

1719
01:45:08,780 --> 01:45:10,780
Which story? Oh, this is a fun one

1720
01:45:11,500 --> 01:45:13,500
So in high school I was like, okay

1721
01:45:13,500 --> 01:45:15,500
so in high school, I

1722
01:45:16,700 --> 01:45:18,140
I

1723
01:45:18,140 --> 01:45:23,340
Was in the art class. I'm just gonna start from the beginning. It'll be a pretty long story, but it's worth it at the end

1724
01:45:25,020 --> 01:45:27,100
Wasn't worth it for me, but it's a funny story

1725
01:45:28,780 --> 01:45:34,780
So I was 17 years old and I was in art class with this russian

1726
01:45:35,500 --> 01:45:41,660
She was like straight off the boat from russia like thick russian. No, really thick russian. She had a russian accent

1727
01:45:41,660 --> 01:45:43,660
Um beautiful beautiful girl

1728
01:45:44,300 --> 01:45:46,300
Um, and I was just sitting there

1729
01:45:46,940 --> 01:45:48,940
um and uh

1730
01:45:48,940 --> 01:45:52,220
She caught my she caught my eye and I'm like, huh?

1731
01:45:53,100 --> 01:45:55,100
She's good looking so um

1732
01:45:56,060 --> 01:45:58,060
ended up, you know

1733
01:45:58,620 --> 01:45:59,980
She's doing stupid shit

1734
01:45:59,980 --> 01:46:04,140
And she said the thing that got her was I had these little fucking puppets that I made

1735
01:46:04,300 --> 01:46:08,700
And I would be making little scenes with my puppets like above like my little easel

1736
01:46:08,700 --> 01:46:13,820
I'm going like this and like I'd look at her with the puppets and look back and I'd be making little scenes

1737
01:46:16,700 --> 01:46:19,580
But um, she goes she like did like the like

1738
01:46:21,260 --> 01:46:24,060
Shit like when she like pats the chair next to her and I'm like

1739
01:46:25,180 --> 01:46:26,380
jackpot

1740
01:46:26,380 --> 01:46:29,500
Motherfucker. I knew that I was gonna get the bitches my name

1741
01:46:30,700 --> 01:46:32,700
They all told me I was autistic

1742
01:46:33,500 --> 01:46:36,060
So I end up talking to her we hit things off

1743
01:46:36,060 --> 01:46:40,380
Uh, I start talking to her like she gives me her number. Uh, we end up dating

1744
01:46:40,860 --> 01:46:42,860
um

1745
01:46:43,020 --> 01:46:45,580
The whole dating thing is sick. She was

1746
01:46:46,620 --> 01:46:49,740
fucking nuts in the best possible way, um

1747
01:46:50,460 --> 01:46:52,300
and um

1748
01:46:52,300 --> 01:46:53,660
so uh

1749
01:46:53,660 --> 01:46:55,660
then her uh her

1750
01:46:55,900 --> 01:47:01,740
Literate legitimate xkgb dad finds out that she's dating an american

1751
01:47:01,740 --> 01:47:05,420
And that's when things start going downhill

1752
01:47:06,860 --> 01:47:10,540
Um, we've been dating for like eight months at this point and i'm at the mall

1753
01:47:10,620 --> 01:47:15,980
I'm wearing my fucking leather jacket with all my shit on it and I have my arm around here as an american is yeah

1754
01:47:17,500 --> 01:47:21,180
Yeah, so I have my arm around her we're sitting on the bench. We're eating the pretzel or whatever

1755
01:47:23,180 --> 01:47:25,180
Fuck that

1756
01:47:25,180 --> 01:47:32,060
Yo, that's got you so

1757
01:47:33,180 --> 01:47:39,500
I'm sitting there and here he comes fucking big rotund little fucking russian guy

1758
01:47:40,700 --> 01:47:44,460
Just uh, just do it a little bit lower and i'll talk over it

1759
01:47:44,780 --> 01:47:48,060
Yeah, you can turn that one off because he's got that just do just do that low

1760
01:47:48,940 --> 01:47:52,700
So all of a sudden big red comes along. That's why I started calling him

1761
01:47:52,700 --> 01:47:58,540
He had some fucking weird like russian name. It's called big red. So big red's coming along. He's just like

1762
01:47:59,580 --> 01:48:01,980
Looks at me. That's like the weird like head turn thing

1763
01:48:02,380 --> 01:48:07,740
He looks at her start speaking in russian and I look at him become a shit head 17 year old and I go

1764
01:48:08,140 --> 01:48:13,180
Hey, I know you're insulting me. Can you just say it in english so I can understand and he's just like, oh

1765
01:48:13,740 --> 01:48:16,860
The american has some balls does he and I go

1766
01:48:16,860 --> 01:48:22,060
Oh, you just gave me this i'm like, well your daughter seems to like him

1767
01:48:22,780 --> 01:48:27,980
And then he is like get the fuck out of here and i'm like, it's a public it's a public place

1768
01:48:28,060 --> 01:48:31,900
We're in a free country now. Hold on. Did he have his tracksuit on?

1769
01:48:33,420 --> 01:48:38,780
Uh, he had the track pants on not the jacket. He had like a white t-shirt and like track pants on

1770
01:48:39,420 --> 01:48:43,980
So fucking big red is fucking like talking to to my my ex-girlfriend in russian

1771
01:48:43,980 --> 01:48:48,640
And he is like blah blah blah blah blah russian russian russian russian russian. She starts crying

1772
01:48:52,300 --> 01:48:56,380
So i'm sitting there and she starts crying and i'm like, whoa, man

1773
01:48:57,580 --> 01:48:58,940
You don't need to do that

1774
01:48:58,940 --> 01:49:02,460
And he goes i'll speak in your filthy tongue to tell you this

1775
01:49:02,860 --> 01:49:07,260
Do not ever contact my daughter ever again and I go fuck you

1776
01:49:07,260 --> 01:49:13,660
You like fucking grabs her by her arm and like takes her away and big red's fucking on the warpath

1777
01:49:14,140 --> 01:49:16,300
Now i'm like, whatever and then um

1778
01:49:17,340 --> 01:49:20,620
So her family goes out of town for the weekend, but she stays there

1779
01:49:21,180 --> 01:49:23,180
You can kind of assume what happens there

1780
01:49:23,500 --> 01:49:25,100
um

1781
01:49:25,100 --> 01:49:27,820
She comes out with a kgb fucking hat

1782
01:49:28,780 --> 01:49:30,860
That's like like the fur ones

1783
01:49:31,580 --> 01:49:34,700
No shit with a little fucking thing. Yeah, where do you get one of those?

1784
01:49:34,700 --> 01:49:40,700
Uh from russia during the soviets. Um, you know, let's try to order one. So I was sitting there

1785
01:49:41,260 --> 01:49:43,260
And uh, then she's like, oh

1786
01:49:43,820 --> 01:49:48,220
They're coming home because I fell asleep and i'm like you're doing what now

1787
01:49:49,420 --> 01:49:56,140
So fucking this one of like they're pulling into driveway. I put my fucking pants on i'm fucking jumping out the window

1788
01:49:56,540 --> 01:49:58,540
And she is like the don one bro

1789
01:49:58,540 --> 01:50:04,700
Yeah, 60 bucks for a fur trapper hat. So I fucking jumped out the goddamn window

1790
01:50:04,940 --> 01:50:09,180
I'm fucking running through the fucking things. I'm just jumping over fences and shit. Um

1791
01:50:10,040 --> 01:50:13,980
Eventually, I go and pick her up and uh, I walk up to the door and I do like that

1792
01:50:15,500 --> 01:50:16,780
Hello

1793
01:50:16,780 --> 01:50:19,980
And he opens the door and I and I see her crying in the background

1794
01:50:19,980 --> 01:50:22,780
He goes I told you never to come here again and I go

1795
01:50:22,780 --> 01:50:29,820
Okay, uh, that's not gonna stop me and he goes maybe this little he pulls out a revolver fucking points it at me

1796
01:50:30,300 --> 01:50:32,140
and i'm like

1797
01:50:32,140 --> 01:50:34,140
Well, I'm never coming here again

1798
01:50:34,300 --> 01:50:35,740
No, no, no, no, no, no, no

1799
01:50:35,740 --> 01:50:39,900
I was still an insane 17 year old and I looked him dead in the fucking eyes and I go

1800
01:50:40,300 --> 01:50:42,940
Next time you pull a gun on somebody make sure it's loaded

1801
01:50:44,860 --> 01:50:48,060
And then he goes like he like goes like stunned he's like

1802
01:50:48,060 --> 01:50:52,620
He's like I see you'll have some balls on you and I'm like I do

1803
01:50:53,580 --> 01:50:55,580
And I go I would like to see

1804
01:50:56,380 --> 01:50:58,780
Her name and he goes no

1805
01:50:59,340 --> 01:51:00,860
You know, I go

1806
01:51:00,860 --> 01:51:04,060
I go fuck yourself chief. He goes i'll call the police and I go

1807
01:51:04,060 --> 01:51:08,540
What are you gonna call the police? You pulled a gun on a 17 year old and you're probably here legally

1808
01:51:09,340 --> 01:51:12,860
Like what the fuck are you gonna do? It wasn't just a test to see if you're like

1809
01:51:13,500 --> 01:51:15,980
Man enough. Yeah, but no he really was

1810
01:51:15,980 --> 01:51:18,860
Made enough. Yeah, but no he really didn't want you

1811
01:51:20,220 --> 01:51:22,220
So then I go again

1812
01:51:24,300 --> 01:51:26,300
Hello

1813
01:51:26,700 --> 01:51:29,900
And then I see him come out click click

1814
01:51:31,580 --> 01:51:35,260
Loaded this time and I go. Oh you learned

1815
01:51:35,260 --> 01:51:44,540
Damn fuck that and then he goes ain't no tail worth getting a fucking rounding him back. So i'm like, ah

1816
01:51:46,140 --> 01:51:49,180
This time i'm like, okay, maybe I should get the fuck out of here

1817
01:51:49,740 --> 01:51:54,300
And then I uh, I dipped out so then we started seeing each other like romyo and juliet style

1818
01:51:54,540 --> 01:52:01,260
Like fucking like sneaking out and like doing shit fucking hanging out on bridges and shit and you know doing the weird teenager shit

1819
01:52:01,260 --> 01:52:06,620
And then eventually it's a sad ending to this story and it's it hurt a lot

1820
01:52:06,940 --> 01:52:10,940
Um, but i'm over it now, but like at the time it was devastating. She died

1821
01:52:11,660 --> 01:52:16,380
Um, I was uh, I was sitting there and I got uh, she goes hey

1822
01:52:16,940 --> 01:52:21,980
I'm going to a youth counselor's camp like thing and like I got i'm canceling i'm counseling some kids

1823
01:52:22,140 --> 01:52:25,420
Uh, i'll be back in like three days. So i'm like, okay, whatever

1824
01:52:25,420 --> 01:52:30,620
And then she goes now I get a text message like two days later and it's just like

1825
01:52:31,740 --> 01:52:34,620
Uh, i'm so sorry and I go what happened?

1826
01:52:35,260 --> 01:52:41,100
And she goes one thing led to another and I fucked one of the other counselors here. Damn, but did you get the fucker?

1827
01:52:42,300 --> 01:52:46,300
Yeah, okay. Okay. All right. You're fine then so so i'm like

1828
01:52:47,020 --> 01:52:49,020
I'm like you did what?

1829
01:52:49,500 --> 01:52:52,460
Damn, that's such a punch in the gut and i'm like

1830
01:52:52,460 --> 01:52:55,740
You you did what and she goes my dad like?

1831
01:52:56,380 --> 01:52:58,780
Want like he like they got married by the way

1832
01:52:58,780 --> 01:53:07,740
They're they're married now because her dad arranged this marriage and basically her dad was like fucking basically telling this guy to pretty much force himself onto her

1833
01:53:08,380 --> 01:53:12,540
And she just accepted and she just like yeah, she's like I feel so bad

1834
01:53:12,540 --> 01:53:17,260
But you know, I you know, it was the one that my dad wanted me to be with so i'm like

1835
01:53:17,260 --> 01:53:19,020
I drew a line of sand right there

1836
01:53:19,020 --> 01:53:25,900
I'm like either you become a free person away from your dad and make your own fucking choices

1837
01:53:26,780 --> 01:53:32,780
Or we're fucking done. Dude. This story is giving me feels bro. Yeah, it's hitting me right in the feels

1838
01:53:33,260 --> 01:53:36,700
Get the music going and then i'm like and then and then she goes

1839
01:53:37,420 --> 01:53:38,940
I

1840
01:53:38,940 --> 01:53:43,100
I can't I can't go away from my dad and i'm like, all right

1841
01:53:43,740 --> 01:53:45,740
We're gonna i'll cut it off then

1842
01:53:45,740 --> 01:53:48,620
Damn, it sounds like you got cut off though

1843
01:53:49,900 --> 01:53:53,820
It sounds like you're telling yourself you're cutting it off. Sounds like you got caught off

1844
01:53:53,820 --> 01:53:56,780
I did get cut off, but there's an epilogue to this story

1845
01:53:57,180 --> 01:54:02,140
um, we went to the same college after that and I was uh, I was sitting down

1846
01:54:02,940 --> 01:54:03,820
and uh

1847
01:54:03,820 --> 01:54:06,300
She came up and she goes hey, I just

1848
01:54:06,940 --> 01:54:09,820
Like just like this was like coincidental like she didn't like she goes

1849
01:54:10,060 --> 01:54:12,060
I got an extra coffee by mistake

1850
01:54:12,060 --> 01:54:17,020
And it was the same exact type of coffee that I liked with like the same exact like thing because she like got like the same

1851
01:54:17,020 --> 01:54:21,580
exact thing that I got like every time after I showed her to her so she gave me the cup

1852
01:54:22,540 --> 01:54:27,260
And uh, I drank it and i'm like this is like the same exact thing that we used to get when we were together

1853
01:54:27,820 --> 01:54:33,660
And then I kind of did like the you don't ever think of what happened if uh, things turned out differently type thing

1854
01:54:34,300 --> 01:54:37,500
And then she goes hey, I know we're in like the same type of class

1855
01:54:37,500 --> 01:54:42,300
You want to come over to my like dorm and study and i'm like sure?

1856
01:54:42,460 --> 01:54:49,260
And then they were like him and him her and the guy that she cheered on me with were together at this point

1857
01:54:49,820 --> 01:54:55,500
And uh, I had the chance to fuck her and make her cheat on him with me

1858
01:54:56,540 --> 01:54:57,740
but then

1859
01:54:57,740 --> 01:55:01,340
The fucking little bit of good in me was like i'm gonna be the bigger man

1860
01:55:02,300 --> 01:55:04,300
Oh my god, why?

1861
01:55:04,300 --> 01:55:09,420
I know dan would have done it. It's not like I have no morals, but

1862
01:55:10,700 --> 01:55:12,700
Man, I ain't gonna give that up

1863
01:55:13,660 --> 01:55:17,100
I was a good catholic boy. So you're a better person than me

1864
01:55:18,700 --> 01:55:20,700
Yeah, she was uh something else man

1865
01:55:21,580 --> 01:55:27,420
But uh, that was my first love my first loss and i'm in a better relationship now and you know, things are going great

1866
01:55:27,580 --> 01:55:29,580
You heard it here first

1867
01:55:29,580 --> 01:55:35,580
Yeah, things are going great for tyler here at outside of podcast dude that that story hit me in the fields

1868
01:55:35,900 --> 01:55:38,700
Because there's nothing especially since I had the soviet national anthem. Yeah

1869
01:55:39,420 --> 01:55:42,060
There's there's that's pretty that's a pretty good national anthem. Yeah

1870
01:55:43,900 --> 01:55:47,980
I'm not a russian sympathizer. I'm just saying they got a good national anthem. I have a russian

1871
01:55:48,780 --> 01:55:50,780
You definitely are russian sympathizer

1872
01:55:51,580 --> 01:55:55,420
But uh, yeah like dude, there's no bigger punch in the gut than when

1873
01:55:56,300 --> 01:55:58,540
Ah, it's just like a dude

1874
01:55:58,540 --> 01:56:00,540
That fucks a girl. That's like

1875
01:56:01,020 --> 01:56:02,060
just

1876
01:56:02,060 --> 01:56:06,780
Takes your girl man. That's like hey as the uh, as the song goes

1877
01:56:07,260 --> 01:56:13,420
Never trust a hoe don't trust a ho never trust a hoe that don't trust me

1878
01:56:13,980 --> 01:56:15,980
Yeah, dude. Yeah

1879
01:56:15,980 --> 01:56:17,980
Yeah, that's that's fucking rough

1880
01:56:18,540 --> 01:56:21,900
And then this was like an epilogue to the epilogue

1881
01:56:22,860 --> 01:56:25,900
Uh when I was cleaning out my wallet this year when I was getting a new one

1882
01:56:25,900 --> 01:56:28,620
There was a piece of soviet candy

1883
01:56:29,420 --> 01:56:33,740
Like wrapper that was in it and it was like the candy that you used to give me. How old is your fucking wallet?

1884
01:56:34,540 --> 01:56:40,380
How long has this happened? Dude, this was like fucking like I had this wallet since I was like 15 to like 24

1885
01:56:41,260 --> 01:56:43,260
What brand is this? I gotta

1886
01:56:43,980 --> 01:56:49,180
It was a fucking solid wallet. My wallets always fall apart. I've had this one for a little while. It's a fossil

1887
01:56:49,180 --> 01:56:55,020
But it's not holding up pretty good. It's wearing quite nicely but

1888
01:56:55,820 --> 01:56:59,340
I've never had one last that long. Yeah, dude. It was fucking fantastic

1889
01:56:59,740 --> 01:57:04,860
Like I love that wallet like the one that I got how old you were when you were 15. I was

1890
01:57:06,120 --> 01:57:12,140
17 to 18 when this was going on. Okay, actually no 16 to 18

1891
01:57:12,620 --> 01:57:17,820
But the reason why yeah, I was in high school like it's it's like long past like i'm over it at this point

1892
01:57:17,820 --> 01:57:19,820
But like when I don't know that you are

1893
01:57:21,580 --> 01:57:23,820
You know just I i'm very good at storytelling

1894
01:57:23,980 --> 01:57:27,420
Yeah, but like the reason why I got the new wallet is because I can do both of these now

1895
01:57:27,900 --> 01:57:32,380
Let me let me see so you flash it like a badge. Yeah, you can you can flash it like a badge

1896
01:57:33,340 --> 01:57:37,020
And uh, it's pretty sweet dude. It's great. Like I love that wallet

1897
01:57:37,020 --> 01:57:41,340
Like I got it when I was in maine. I got like a trading post thing. It was fucking sick. Oh shit

1898
01:57:41,900 --> 01:57:43,900
Yeah, it's classy

1899
01:57:43,900 --> 01:57:50,700
Damn dude, it's like that wallet fantastic. Like i've had this for you guys get one of the new cards

1900
01:57:51,180 --> 01:57:57,580
All right, we gotta talk about something here. Is don juan dead or is he making a come back don juan's in the nursing home?

1901
01:57:58,620 --> 01:58:02,300
Put him in a nursing home. He's in a nursing home. Yeah, and it's like a high security nursing

1902
01:58:02,300 --> 01:58:12,060
Home, he can't get out. It's got bars on it. I think don juan should make a couple calls from the nursing home

1903
01:58:14,380 --> 01:58:21,360
So like where did this character of john don juan come from let's let's talk about this man the earliest rendition

1904
01:58:22,460 --> 01:58:28,140
That i'm aware of well one first. I I think that it's truly a sub personality

1905
01:58:28,140 --> 01:58:33,100
That's just from the first cardiac arrest I ever went so like a ghost like attached to his yeah

1906
01:58:33,180 --> 01:58:36,060
I'm possessed by this thing that is don juan

1907
01:58:36,700 --> 01:58:40,780
Um, I I went to this um cardiac arrest for a large

1908
01:58:41,660 --> 01:58:47,260
Very large black male. All right, and I mean he was so large that his shoes

1909
01:58:47,980 --> 01:58:53,980
Uh were flattened out from his cankles. Really? Yeah, they were like fucking size 14 jordans and they were

1910
01:58:54,540 --> 01:58:56,140
completely pancake

1911
01:58:56,140 --> 01:58:58,140
but the first cardiac arrest I went to

1912
01:58:59,500 --> 01:59:00,540
and

1913
01:59:00,540 --> 01:59:01,980
his soul

1914
01:59:01,980 --> 01:59:03,980
Jumped into mine

1915
01:59:06,300 --> 01:59:08,300
This guy, uh

1916
01:59:09,260 --> 01:59:10,380
Just

1917
01:59:10,380 --> 01:59:13,900
That's the only place I can think of and then it would come out slowly

1918
01:59:13,900 --> 01:59:17,660
I just kind of like absorbed little parts of like other people and

1919
01:59:18,460 --> 01:59:22,620
He made this don juan. Yeah, the earliest time I remember

1920
01:59:22,620 --> 01:59:24,620
Talking like that was um

1921
01:59:25,180 --> 01:59:27,740
I was in new york city and this guy had a

1922
01:59:28,300 --> 01:59:29,020
uh

1923
01:59:29,020 --> 01:59:33,660
Delorean yeah, right? Yeah, yeah back to the future. Yeah. Yeah, and I was like

1924
01:59:34,060 --> 01:59:37,660
Yeah, he got a delorean. There's a time machine

1925
01:59:38,940 --> 01:59:42,140
Okay, I can't believe he got a the damn

1926
01:59:43,260 --> 01:59:43,980
like

1927
01:59:43,980 --> 01:59:47,820
That's the earliest time I remember don juan and that's that's how he was born

1928
01:59:47,820 --> 01:59:49,820
I feel like there's a little bit of beetle juice in there, too

1929
01:59:49,820 --> 01:59:52,860
Yeah, a little definitely a little bit of the um

1930
01:59:53,660 --> 01:59:58,220
You know, he kind of I don't know. Oh, well, no, there's there's another place that it came from

1931
01:59:58,220 --> 02:00:00,460
There's a guy that I used to work with

1932
02:00:01,020 --> 02:00:03,740
And I could never understand what the fuck he was saying

1933
02:00:03,740 --> 02:00:08,380
So it's a mix between like all these things these factors. It's multifactorial what made

1934
02:00:08,940 --> 02:00:12,540
Don juan, yeah, but there's this guy I used to work with and

1935
02:00:13,100 --> 02:00:15,420
I remember this guy was telling me a

1936
02:00:16,060 --> 02:00:17,020
story

1937
02:00:17,020 --> 02:00:20,540
And I couldn't figure out what the hell he was talking about. He was like, yeah, so look

1938
02:00:21,580 --> 02:00:23,580
If I was in that position, though

1939
02:00:23,580 --> 02:00:25,980
You know, I put well, I got what I'll ride this shot

1940
02:00:27,580 --> 02:00:29,580
We said

1941
02:00:29,580 --> 02:00:31,580
I'll take care of you

1942
02:00:31,580 --> 02:00:33,580
And I'll come back. I'm gonna take care of you

1943
02:00:34,620 --> 02:00:36,620
I'll make a fight for me

1944
02:00:36,620 --> 02:00:38,620
So I'm like, what is this guy talking about?

1945
02:00:40,140 --> 02:00:44,140
What the hell is he talking about? And I finally figured out that he was

1946
02:00:44,140 --> 02:00:46,940
Pretending he was on the show temptation island

1947
02:00:49,740 --> 02:00:51,740
He was telling a story from his perspective

1948
02:00:52,220 --> 02:00:56,540
But this went on for like 20 minutes to a half hour of me just nodding and smiling

1949
02:00:57,660 --> 02:00:59,660
Just to be talking like that

1950
02:01:01,420 --> 02:01:03,420
And then he'd go like that once in a while

1951
02:01:06,540 --> 02:01:08,540
That's where that came from

1952
02:01:09,740 --> 02:01:11,740
Your co-worker, yeah

1953
02:01:11,740 --> 02:01:15,600
So it'd just be like so I just started doing that like damn that's crazy

1954
02:01:20,860 --> 02:01:25,740
Don Juan was born don Juan's fucking origin. Yeah, I heard it here first

1955
02:01:27,740 --> 02:01:30,140
Bring back don Juan from the nursing home

1956
02:01:31,260 --> 02:01:33,260
One call

1957
02:01:33,260 --> 02:01:36,960
He can make one call he's allowed one call occasionally

1958
02:01:41,340 --> 02:01:43,340
So fucking

1959
02:01:43,580 --> 02:01:45,580
He's not allowed to call Honolulu though

1960
02:01:46,620 --> 02:01:52,300
So, let's see here. Um, I had one more dial out from the nursing home. Yeah, I got I got one more story here

1961
02:01:52,300 --> 02:01:55,420
It looks like so, you know election day's coming up

1962
02:01:56,140 --> 02:02:00,300
Um, i'm voting for lee zeldin as you should fuck you. Um

1963
02:02:00,300 --> 02:02:02,220
um, but

1964
02:02:02,220 --> 02:02:04,780
There's an interesting thing that's happening on election day

1965
02:02:05,900 --> 02:02:13,820
A blood moon will emerge on election day in the last total lunar eclipse in three years is happening on election day in america

1966
02:02:14,860 --> 02:02:22,540
Do you think that's an omen? Do you think it's a coincidence? Do you think it's a um harbinger of bad times?

1967
02:02:23,980 --> 02:02:25,980
I don't know. I don't think it means much

1968
02:02:25,980 --> 02:02:29,900
honestly, also, I bet you could line it up with like

1969
02:02:30,540 --> 02:02:31,500
You know

1970
02:02:31,500 --> 02:02:35,420
I bet every eclipse lines up with somebody's election day somewhere on earth

1971
02:02:36,380 --> 02:02:37,420
You know

1972
02:02:37,420 --> 02:02:39,420
so, uh another question

1973
02:02:39,720 --> 02:02:41,720
goblins real

1974
02:02:41,740 --> 02:02:47,520
Or not real goblins are real goblins are real mother. I've seen harry potter goblin

1975
02:02:48,700 --> 02:02:51,580
Goblin we need to play that song. That's a fucking sick song

1976
02:02:52,140 --> 02:02:54,140
What title the creator goblin bro?

1977
02:02:54,140 --> 02:02:58,940
No, no, that's bass. That's on uh, that's on yonkers. I think yeah. Yeah

1978
02:03:00,460 --> 02:03:02,300
I think you need to play it kasey

1979
02:03:02,300 --> 02:03:08,780
What um yonkers by tyler the creator, you know, that's a song that he actually fucking hates mother fucking goblins

1980
02:03:08,860 --> 02:03:11,280
Can we get some more incest going here? Somewhat?

1981
02:03:14,780 --> 02:03:20,560
Incense what are you doing step bro? My air pods are stuck in the dryer

1982
02:03:20,560 --> 02:03:22,560
Oh

1983
02:03:26,160 --> 02:03:28,160
It's got a hard beat

1984
02:03:28,400 --> 02:03:31,200
I just let it play in the back. Oh fucking walking paradox

1985
02:03:32,000 --> 02:03:34,000
Threesomes with a fucking triceratops

1986
02:03:37,280 --> 02:03:43,380
Wearing synthetic wigs made of anwar's dreadlocks bedrock harder than the motherfucking flintstones

1987
02:03:43,380 --> 02:03:46,440
Making crack rocks out of pussy nigga fishbones

1988
02:03:48,340 --> 02:03:50,340
He's such a weird fellow

1989
02:03:50,820 --> 02:03:57,080
He's got kill written up. He's got kill tattooed on his wrist. He doesn't actually have a tattooed on his face. That's his magic marker

1990
02:04:00,820 --> 02:04:06,280
Tyler actually doesn't have any tattoos. Oh, is he actually gay or no? No, I think he's just like metro

1991
02:04:08,660 --> 02:04:10,740
Because I thought he was like wearing skirts for a while there

1992
02:04:10,740 --> 02:04:15,140
Yeah, I think he's just metro. I think he's just trying to be a freak for attention. Yeah

1993
02:04:15,700 --> 02:04:21,860
This is a music video. He's like, oh he hangs himself at the end. It's moving a cricket and he's like vomiting blood

1994
02:04:21,940 --> 02:04:23,940
I'm not gay. I just want to

1995
02:04:28,660 --> 02:04:30,660
I thought about making that my facebook status

1996
02:04:33,700 --> 02:04:39,140
Fucking hot line or fucking shrinking. She's already got mine and he's not fucking working

1997
02:04:39,140 --> 02:04:41,140
I think i'm wasting my damn time

1998
02:04:43,620 --> 02:04:46,740
My uh, my name on instagram was tyler creator for a little bit

1999
02:04:48,340 --> 02:04:51,780
Oh, yeah, tyler, don't you've never heard this song? No

2000
02:04:52,900 --> 02:04:58,980
Gotta add it to your library. I slipped myself some pink zanies and danced around the house with all over prank panties

2001
02:04:59,860 --> 02:05:04,980
That fucking broad would never understand me. I'm not gay. I just want a boogie to some marvin

2002
02:05:06,180 --> 02:05:08,180
fuck her

2003
02:05:08,180 --> 02:05:10,180
I said fucking airplane out that

2004
02:05:13,460 --> 02:05:20,340
Sorry, he can say that i don't know kenny. Yeah over cheeva and how about i saw the metro?

2005
02:05:20,340 --> 02:05:26,340
Hold on

2006
02:05:31,380 --> 02:05:38,900
Oh did you hear that take off from migos died? Yeah fucking bad dude, you got shot over a game of dice, right? Yeah

2007
02:05:38,900 --> 02:05:49,780
Yeah, I remember I used to shoot dice back at uh at our old company with the fucking local riff raff

2008
02:05:52,660 --> 02:05:54,660
Bums out front dude

2009
02:06:00,100 --> 02:06:05,300
Oh, yeah, he did hang himself. Yeah, dude, it's fucking dark music video man with jeffrey up to him

2010
02:06:05,300 --> 02:06:10,660
Did you ever understand? Oh, no, he didn't come. I thought you're talking about jeffrey domer. I'm like, I thought he got a death penalty

2011
02:06:11,460 --> 02:06:13,460
No, jeffrey domer got killed

2012
02:06:13,780 --> 02:06:15,780
I've seen definitely hung himself

2013
02:06:16,100 --> 02:06:18,100
He felt so guilty

2014
02:06:18,580 --> 02:06:22,600
That's how he did it. Yeah a mother fucking gobbling

2015
02:06:24,100 --> 02:06:30,260
Such a good song there's also one where he's like talking to his conscience, which is a fucking really cool really cool fucking thing

2016
02:06:30,260 --> 02:06:35,380
He's like hello. I'm tc. I'm your conscience. He has all these like split personalities. Yeah

2017
02:06:36,580 --> 02:06:39,380
but I mean back when like goblin and uh

2018
02:06:40,100 --> 02:06:46,420
And bastard came out like he was like dark like fucking rap and now he's like, you know talk about flowers and shit

2019
02:06:46,740 --> 02:06:48,500
like and he's like

2020
02:06:48,500 --> 02:06:50,500
Hucking up with like will smith's son or something

2021
02:06:50,740 --> 02:06:54,660
No, will smith's son wanted to hook up with him and like he came out on stage dude

2022
02:06:54,660 --> 02:07:00,180
It's funny as hell he came out on stage and he goes tyler. I want you to be my boyfriend and tyler crater comes out

2023
02:07:00,180 --> 02:07:02,180
He goes i'm not fucking gay

2024
02:07:05,060 --> 02:07:07,060
And jaden smith runs off the stage

2025
02:07:10,260 --> 02:07:12,980
Oh man a motherfucking goblin yeah

2026
02:07:17,380 --> 02:07:20,180
I want to hear i want to hear don juan's revival

2027
02:07:20,180 --> 02:07:22,180
Oh

2028
02:07:22,900 --> 02:07:25,140
Dude it's actually late now. It might not be

2029
02:07:26,340 --> 02:07:28,340
Nah bro

2030
02:07:31,860 --> 02:07:36,500
Okay, hallelujah is always open there's always a place what other countries are open

2031
02:07:37,300 --> 02:07:42,740
I don't know if you want to make international you can call los angeles or something. They'll be mean

2032
02:07:43,700 --> 02:07:45,700
or like organ or

2033
02:07:45,780 --> 02:07:47,780
One of those western places

2034
02:07:47,780 --> 02:07:49,780
Let's see

2035
02:07:50,100 --> 02:07:54,660
Let's see who are we gonna call when we called oklahoma city. They fucking got real angie

2036
02:07:57,140 --> 02:07:59,860
Something else you better star six seven your number

2037
02:08:02,260 --> 02:08:06,660
Your number is probably on like a fucking like a prank call watch list or some shit

2038
02:08:11,300 --> 02:08:13,300
What are we gonna call about

2039
02:08:13,300 --> 02:08:15,300
Who are you calling um

2040
02:08:17,460 --> 02:08:19,460
I like like walmart or target

2041
02:08:20,340 --> 02:08:23,540
I'll be looking for that movie with that dude he be eating people

2042
02:08:25,780 --> 02:08:28,520
That he be eating people he be like tying them together

2043
02:08:30,180 --> 02:08:32,180
Like sewing them up so they

2044
02:08:32,180 --> 02:08:34,180
Get out there, you know that one

2045
02:08:38,820 --> 02:08:40,820
I don't think they ate anybody

2046
02:08:42,820 --> 02:08:46,980
No, that's crazy they didn't watch you watch that human centipede

2047
02:08:48,020 --> 02:08:50,020
I've seen oh, i've seen that

2048
02:08:50,340 --> 02:08:52,340
The second one was definitely the worst

2049
02:08:53,860 --> 02:08:56,980
That was just made to shock people what's what's another movie?

2050
02:08:58,020 --> 02:08:59,220
um

2051
02:08:59,220 --> 02:09:01,140
fucking

2052
02:09:01,140 --> 02:09:03,860
Mariah Carey's all I want for christmas is you cd

2053
02:09:07,860 --> 02:09:13,380
Let's do some christmas movies because holiday season's coming up then we got that one with a doe he be like

2054
02:09:13,860 --> 02:09:15,860
That his parents will have a case

2055
02:09:16,420 --> 02:09:19,220
And uh, they forgot all about that little dough

2056
02:09:19,860 --> 02:09:26,200
And he be going how easy like he he's at his house and shit. He be like he be shooting burners

2057
02:09:26,200 --> 02:09:29,480
He be like, you know that one

2058
02:09:33,400 --> 02:09:38,040
With that one with the little kid on the fucking train and it's like sliding on the ice

2059
02:09:42,760 --> 02:09:44,760
I hate that fucking movie

2060
02:09:46,360 --> 02:09:50,360
Yeah, so you know that one though he got the dough from save that fucking

2061
02:09:50,360 --> 02:09:57,800
Narcid my fucking asshole who the fucking narc kid who's like i'm telling the conductor that you're being a fucking retard

2062
02:09:58,440 --> 02:10:01,480
That movie just gives me weird vibes. It's like what are you supposed to?

2063
02:10:01,640 --> 02:10:09,000
Yeah, what are the fucking adults doing with a bunch of fucking toddlers on a fucking train by themselves in the middle of the night?

2064
02:10:09,080 --> 02:10:14,680
Also, it's a fucking bum that just hangs out on the top of the train who's also a ghost. Yeah, he's just like yo

2065
02:10:14,680 --> 02:10:19,800
Also tom hanks, yeah, tom hanks is fucking the two personalities. You have the conductor

2066
02:10:19,960 --> 02:10:21,960
He got the scary bum on the top

2067
02:10:21,960 --> 02:10:25,720
Let's talk about the polar express real quick because that movie's fucking wild

2068
02:10:25,960 --> 02:10:31,560
This kid doesn't believe in santa claus or the fucking holiday spirit and then a fucking train pulls up

2069
02:10:31,720 --> 02:10:37,480
He's like what the fuck and tom hanks could ask let's get on the train my guy and the kid's like, okay

2070
02:10:37,800 --> 02:10:39,560
Do you think that this?

2071
02:10:39,560 --> 02:10:44,280
Movie is a metaphor for freedom of speech. Yeah freedom of thought. Oh, yeah

2072
02:10:44,280 --> 02:10:48,440
If you don't believe what we want you to believe you're gonna get on the train. Oh

2073
02:10:49,960 --> 02:10:51,960
Oh shit, it's like the holocaust

2074
02:10:52,280 --> 02:10:54,760
And like he goes on like this whole like fucking journey

2075
02:10:55,240 --> 02:10:59,800
And like he goes to the fucking top of the train and the top of the train has like the bomb. He's like, oh

2076
02:11:00,520 --> 02:11:02,680
I'm drinking coffee out of my sock

2077
02:11:05,320 --> 02:11:09,560
And like he fucking like goes oh christmas santa

2078
02:11:11,320 --> 02:11:12,360
Wow

2079
02:11:12,360 --> 02:11:14,360
This kid believes in santa

2080
02:11:15,160 --> 02:11:20,680
He fucking goes see you later kid. It just disappears in the snow because like what the fuck just happened

2081
02:11:22,040 --> 02:11:28,840
Then he just goes down and like these fucking these fucking like train operators are like there's ice on the tracks, man

2082
02:11:30,040 --> 02:11:35,320
These motherfuckers go we're gonna drift a train and they're like you can't drift the train. We're gonna drift the fucking train

2083
02:11:35,320 --> 02:11:43,320
And they drift a fucking train and then they get to the fucking north pole and there's fucking like special ops elves

2084
02:11:43,780 --> 02:11:49,560
parachuting down and shit and santa goes the true spirit of christmas lies in your heart

2085
02:11:50,840 --> 02:11:54,920
Points at him the kids like whoa, that's fucking crazy, man

2086
02:11:56,600 --> 02:11:59,320
I love that the movie synopsis by tyler

2087
02:11:59,320 --> 02:12:04,040
Dude I can do I got a whole bunch of movies I can synopsis. I

2088
02:12:04,920 --> 02:12:10,120
I've actually only seen parts of that movie. I've never seen the whole thing, but now I don't need to watch it, dude

2089
02:12:10,120 --> 02:12:16,200
You don't I can synopsis fucking ghostbusters. There's a bum drinking coffee out of a sock

2090
02:12:17,800 --> 02:12:19,800
Hot chocolate, I forgot about hot chocolate

2091
02:12:19,800 --> 02:12:24,120
Oh, fuck you dude, so

2092
02:12:27,160 --> 02:12:32,200
Um, i'm gonna talk about ghostbusters and synopsifies it so uh,

2093
02:12:32,600 --> 02:12:39,640
There's these three scientist dudes one's fucking bill murray one's fucking dan acaroid and one is fucking

2094
02:12:40,520 --> 02:12:42,600
I always forget his name. He's just fucking egon

2095
02:12:43,160 --> 02:12:44,600
That's real quick

2096
02:12:44,600 --> 02:12:51,160
So fucking they're they're doing ghost they're doing fucking research man, and then fucking dad bill

2097
02:12:51,160 --> 02:12:54,600
Murray's doing fucking electric shocks and shit on this fucking dude

2098
02:12:55,000 --> 02:12:59,000
He's trying to fuck this chick who's also doing the electric shock therapy

2099
02:12:59,320 --> 02:13:01,640
So he tells her that she's a psychic and then fucking

2100
02:13:02,280 --> 02:13:08,520
Big fucking dan acaroid comes he's like we got a ghost my guy and then he says like can we not do this right now?

2101
02:13:09,000 --> 02:13:11,000
I'm really trying to fuck this girl

2102
02:13:11,000 --> 02:13:14,440
And he's just like no, man, we got to go to the library

2103
02:13:14,520 --> 02:13:18,760
So he goes to the fucking library and they go downstairs in the basement and they have like

2104
02:13:19,240 --> 02:13:24,920
Books that are stacked on top of each other like in a library and then like a ghost comes out and they're like hey

2105
02:13:25,320 --> 02:13:27,400
What's up? You're a ghost and the ghost goes

2106
02:13:29,880 --> 02:13:33,160
And like they go whoa and they fucking leave

2107
02:13:34,840 --> 02:13:35,800
and

2108
02:13:35,800 --> 02:13:40,360
They go back to their like fire station. No, they go back and they're like this is great news

2109
02:13:40,360 --> 02:13:43,320
We can capture ghosts now so then they buy a fire station

2110
02:13:43,960 --> 02:13:50,440
For whatever reason and when they buy the fire station, they're just chilling in the fire station and then like these fucking

2111
02:13:51,160 --> 02:13:54,920
Oh, it's hot ass fucking receptionist fucking calls them and says hey

2112
02:13:56,200 --> 02:14:01,400
She's got like the really like gooey look which I really like like it's a nice look anyways

2113
02:14:01,560 --> 02:14:03,640
Uh, this so the gooey the gooey

2114
02:14:04,520 --> 02:14:09,080
Fucking receptionist lady who's really hot and I would love love to you know

2115
02:14:09,080 --> 02:14:11,080
Get to know better if you know what I mean

2116
02:14:11,480 --> 02:14:12,760
um

2117
02:14:12,760 --> 02:14:14,680
Goes we got one and they go to a go

2118
02:14:14,680 --> 02:14:21,160
They go to a hotel and this fucking fat ass fucking ghost is going blah blah eating like hot dogs and shit

2119
02:14:21,240 --> 02:14:26,440
So they shoot fucking lasers at them and then they shoot lasers at them and they capture them and then the fucking

2120
02:14:26,840 --> 02:14:32,120
The hotel guy's like i'm not gonna pay you and he goes well, we'll put them right back and he just goes well

2121
02:14:32,200 --> 02:14:36,120
We'll pay you five thousand dollars and he's like, okay, we'll take that

2122
02:14:36,120 --> 02:14:42,040
So then they go back to the fire station and they're you know doing like this weird ghost shit and they see like, you know

2123
02:14:42,120 --> 02:14:44,120
more and more ghosts are coming out and

2124
02:14:44,680 --> 02:14:48,600
Um, so like the more and more ghosts are coming to new york city. It's ghost central, man

2125
02:14:49,080 --> 02:14:51,640
So then like all these ghosts are running around new york city

2126
02:14:51,640 --> 02:14:56,040
So they're fucking like becoming like these famous like dudes and like everywhere like they're running around

2127
02:14:56,440 --> 02:15:00,360
And like they're going around new york city and they're fucking fighting ghosts and shit and then they go

2128
02:15:00,440 --> 02:15:04,120
Hey, man, you see elvis and they all laugh and then I just got back. Can you start over?

2129
02:15:04,120 --> 02:15:09,160
And then dan acrobat gets his dick sucked by a ghost and dream and then does that happen?

2130
02:15:09,720 --> 02:15:13,800
Yeah, it happens in the movie. I'm not lying about that hot ghost. No, it's an invisible ghost

2131
02:15:14,200 --> 02:15:21,240
So the invisible ghost sucks his dick and he comes and then uh, it goes on and then they realize that uh fucking dana barrett

2132
02:15:21,240 --> 02:15:27,880
Fucking sigourney weaver is like fucking like a like really like hot like lady and bill murray's trying to get with her

2133
02:15:27,880 --> 02:15:33,480
And then she's like, oh i'm not gonna get with you and eggs fucking go on to her counter and they're like

2134
02:15:33,480 --> 02:15:37,640
On her counter and they start boiling on the fucking counter and the eggs are being fried and she's like, whoa

2135
02:15:37,640 --> 02:15:38,840
I need to call the ghost buster

2136
02:15:38,840 --> 02:15:42,760
So then bill murray comes in with a fucking probing device and he starts going huh?

2137
02:15:43,160 --> 02:15:46,680
Cool. Look at all this shit and she's like, well nothing happened in the bedroom

2138
02:15:46,680 --> 02:15:50,440
He goes that's a shame and then they go to the kitchen and then he goes over he goes

2139
02:15:50,520 --> 02:15:54,120
Whoa, those look like they've been cooked in the counter. She goes they did and he goes she goes

2140
02:15:54,120 --> 02:15:57,880
There's like a fucking demon in my refrigerator. So he opens up the refrigerator. He goes. Whoa

2141
02:15:58,200 --> 02:16:02,840
There's coca-cola and junk food in here and she's like there was a demon in my refrigerator and he goes

2142
02:16:02,840 --> 02:16:06,200
Well, that happens sometimes so then he goes in

2143
02:16:06,760 --> 02:16:10,120
And they go back to the fucking fire station and this prick fucking comes in

2144
02:16:10,120 --> 02:16:15,960
He's just like i'm with the epa and they go fuck you and they go on and they catching more ghosts and shit

2145
02:16:15,960 --> 02:16:18,040
But while they're trying to catch more ghosts and shit

2146
02:16:18,440 --> 02:16:18,840
um

2147
02:16:18,840 --> 02:16:19,880
They fucking you know

2148
02:16:19,880 --> 02:16:26,280
The goeser to goes arian this fucking sagorny weaver gets possessed by this fucking demon and she starts acting like all horny and shit

2149
02:16:26,600 --> 02:16:29,880
And she fucking finds fucking this little rick moranis man

2150
02:16:29,880 --> 02:16:34,360
And he's like real short and real ugly looking and he tries to and then like he turns into a fuck

2151
02:16:34,360 --> 02:16:35,640
He gets possessed by a demon

2152
02:16:35,640 --> 02:16:41,720
So then sagorny weaver and rick moranis fuck each other and then they go on top of a building and summon a demigod

2153
02:16:41,960 --> 02:16:43,960
So then the ghostbusters go up the tree

2154
02:16:44,600 --> 02:16:48,840
The building and they get to the top of the building and there's like this fucking lady with a flat top

2155
02:16:49,080 --> 02:16:52,360
And the lady with the flat top's like i'm a demigod. Tell me you're fucking

2156
02:16:52,840 --> 02:16:59,000
Destroyer of worlds so he's fucking up there and they're like don't think anything and she's like you already chose and everybody's like

2157
02:16:59,000 --> 02:17:02,040
We didn't think anything and then ray's like and then fucking dan agarwal's like well

2158
02:17:02,120 --> 02:17:06,600
I actually thought of something like what the fuck did you think of and like the stay puffed marshmallow man?

2159
02:17:06,920 --> 02:17:11,560
Fucking 50 fucking stories tall of fucking marshmallow man's coming through new york

2160
02:17:11,720 --> 02:17:17,240
So they start shooting at this fucking bitch with lasers coming out and then they're like, whoa, don't cross the streams

2161
02:17:17,240 --> 02:17:20,440
They go why wouldn't it why wouldn't they early in the movie? They're like don't cross the streams

2162
02:17:20,440 --> 02:17:25,160
They're like why because it'll burn your fucking dick off. So then they're like, well, I don't want my dick burned off

2163
02:17:25,160 --> 02:17:30,040
So then they go and they're like, hey, we gotta cross the streams to get this bitch and they're like, whoa, man

2164
02:17:30,040 --> 02:17:35,480
That's uh, I don't want my dick burned off and like well, there's theoretically your dick won't get burned off

2165
02:17:35,480 --> 02:17:37,800
But there's a high probability that your dick will get burned off

2166
02:17:37,960 --> 02:17:45,160
So then they fucking shoot this bitch with a flat top and then she fucking explodes and then the stay puffed marshmallow man fucking just

2167
02:17:45,520 --> 02:17:50,680
Incinerates himself and screams and then marshmallow goo goes everywhere. This fucking prick goes whoa

2168
02:17:50,680 --> 02:17:57,160
He looks up and marshmallow goes all over it's like fucking cum. There's this about gallons and gallons of fucking marshmallow

2169
02:17:57,160 --> 02:18:03,960
Cum all over New York City all over Central Park West the entirety of Central Park West fucking cum of marshmallows. So

2170
02:18:04,520 --> 02:18:11,160
Then they're like, oh, well, it smells like wet dog hair here and the demon fucking horses or dogs or whatever

2171
02:18:11,160 --> 02:18:16,600
Fuck they are like, oh, I'm sorry fucking Bill Murray you your your your girlfriend turned into a dog

2172
02:18:16,600 --> 02:18:19,880
And you see her fucking hand come out. He's like, whoa, she's not covered in cum

2173
02:18:19,880 --> 02:18:24,080
So he like rips her out and then fucking little retard Rick Moran is comes out

2174
02:18:24,080 --> 02:18:28,640
He's like hey guys anybody do your taxes and they're like I want a sample of your brain tissue the end

2175
02:18:30,080 --> 02:18:37,220
That was amazing experience. I um, I don't think I could tell you the general synopsis of my favorite movie

2176
02:18:40,960 --> 02:18:45,000
That was incredible, all right, we're gonna play a game it's called how many

2177
02:18:45,000 --> 02:18:51,680
How many Christmas movies can a target employee guess by that? I actually

2178
02:18:56,520 --> 02:18:59,180
Got that one prank calls make me feel all right, so

2179
02:19:01,440 --> 02:19:05,880
Right you can do that. I don't feel great about this either

2180
02:19:07,160 --> 02:19:09,160
Casey's the only one that actually wants to do it

2181
02:19:09,160 --> 02:19:14,680
I just feel bad for the people doing it

2182
02:19:17,720 --> 02:19:19,720
I'm Dan's conscience

2183
02:19:21,280 --> 02:19:27,800
We gotta give the people what they want so much down I think I think that we need to keep them in retirement my guys

2184
02:19:27,800 --> 02:19:29,800
I can do another movie

2185
02:19:33,040 --> 02:19:38,280
I'm torn. I'm torn. I'll do another movie back to the future. That'd be a fun one

2186
02:19:38,280 --> 02:19:40,280
Right down the middle

2187
02:19:40,280 --> 02:19:42,280
We got the word

2188
02:19:46,960 --> 02:19:51,160
Fuck a dude, it's the fuckers spaghetti with fuck up maple syrup

2189
02:19:54,600 --> 02:19:57,360
I got I got another one. I'll do back to future

2190
02:19:58,520 --> 02:20:01,360
Lord fucking forgive me. I love back to the features

2191
02:20:01,360 --> 02:20:09,640
So you got this fucking cat Marty McFly so this fucking cat goes back in time tries to fuck his mom

2192
02:20:09,640 --> 02:20:15,240
Oh, no, no, no, we need to go more in depth than that. So we got this cat Marty McFly

2193
02:20:15,240 --> 02:20:20,080
He's a real fucking slacker his parents hate him his girlfriend hates him

2194
02:20:21,080 --> 02:20:24,360
down hates him we lost our remaining view except for

2195
02:20:24,360 --> 02:20:31,360
Everybody in town hates him except for a fucking crackhead scientist and he hangs out with this crackhead scientist

2196
02:20:31,360 --> 02:20:35,160
So he goes over to this crackhead scientist house and he goes yo, man

2197
02:20:35,160 --> 02:20:40,440
There's a big ass speaker over here and he pulls out his rad ass guitar. So he goes yo, man

2198
02:20:40,440 --> 02:20:46,280
I'm gonna play the raddest fucking thing ever and then he sees a note that says do not turn up volume

2199
02:20:46,280 --> 02:20:52,080
So he goes I'm gonna turn up the fucking volume. Anyways, the only guy in town that actually likes him. He's gonna fuck him over

2200
02:20:52,600 --> 02:20:53,880
so

2201
02:20:53,880 --> 02:21:01,760
Fucking Marty McFly fucking goes damn and then fucking explodes out the back door. He's like righteous man

2202
02:21:02,520 --> 02:21:04,520
rock and roll

2203
02:21:06,120 --> 02:21:09,920
Rock and roll so he's fucking he's like rock and roll man

2204
02:21:09,920 --> 02:21:16,280
So then he goes out and then Huey Lewis in the news starts playing and they're fucking he's going down the street on his rad

2205
02:21:16,600 --> 02:21:18,600
skateboard

2206
02:21:18,600 --> 02:21:23,280
So he's fucking going on his fucking skateboard and he sees this fucking truck

2207
02:21:23,280 --> 02:21:26,680
He's like, you know what? I'm gonna hang on to this truck. So he's hanging on to this truck

2208
02:21:26,680 --> 02:21:32,200
He sees a yoga studio with some hot-ass biddies. He goes. Hey, how you doing? What else does he go by?

2209
02:21:32,440 --> 02:21:39,240
What else did he go? He goes by the hot-ass biddies goes by a Burger King. Dude. Do you fucking photographic fucking memory?

2210
02:21:39,840 --> 02:21:46,340
Are you fucking kidding me? I watch this movie so many fucking time. This is my favorite movie. Yeah, he's reciting these

2211
02:21:46,340 --> 02:21:48,340
We don't need to watch the movie

2212
02:21:48,340 --> 02:21:50,340
We can recite the fucking movie

2213
02:21:50,340 --> 02:21:55,940
I'll keep going. Okay, so he goes by the yoga studio that goes hey, there's some hot-ass biddies over there and they're like

2214
02:21:55,940 --> 02:21:59,060
Oh, hey Marty, we fucking hate you. So then he's like, alright

2215
02:21:59,060 --> 02:22:03,380
I'm gonna go to school and he meets his girlfriend at the front gate and the girlfriend's like oh dude

2216
02:22:03,380 --> 02:22:06,460
Our principal is gonna be pissed at you. He's like, hey, I don't give a shit

2217
02:22:06,460 --> 02:22:11,300
So he goes inside and his principal is just fucking standing there like you're a smacker just like your fucking father

2218
02:22:11,380 --> 02:22:15,580
He goes fuck you Marty. I hope you die in a car accident. He goes. Oh you wait

2219
02:22:15,580 --> 02:22:17,580
So then he goes alright

2220
02:22:17,700 --> 02:22:22,140
So he goes in and he fucking goes to school. He goes to his classes and he goes wait a minute

2221
02:22:22,140 --> 02:22:28,980
I gotta go see my crackhead friend who's a scientist at the fucking pines Twin Pine Mall at fucking 9 11 p.m

2222
02:22:29,060 --> 02:22:31,060
So he goes to fucking

2223
02:22:32,740 --> 02:22:38,500
So he's fucking going to the thing and he goes in and he's like, is that a that DeLorean? He goes yeah, man

2224
02:22:38,500 --> 02:22:40,180
It's me and a steel

2225
02:22:40,180 --> 02:22:46,100
And he's fucking like hey look, there's a dog. So he goes we're gonna send the dog back in time. So he fucking sends the dog

2226
02:22:46,100 --> 02:22:51,780
back in time animal abuse and he fucking the dog just disintegrates and he's like you just killed the dog

2227
02:22:59,780 --> 02:23:03,060
So that he's like whoa and then they goes and then he fucking looks at his watch he goes

2228
02:23:03,060 --> 02:23:06,460
Oh, no, we gotta get out of the way and he pulls Marty out of the fucking way. He goes

2229
02:23:06,460 --> 02:23:13,940
Oh shit, it fucking lightning comes out a fucking DeLorean comes out dog comes out. He's all fine fucking he holds he touched the thing

2230
02:23:13,940 --> 02:23:15,940
He's like, whoa

2231
02:23:19,780 --> 02:23:22,460
He's like, oh man, this is this is the most scientific

2232
02:23:27,100 --> 02:23:33,620
Goes not not nuclear it's electrical but the only thing I can do an electrical post that one at two one point twenty one

2233
02:23:33,620 --> 02:23:38,780
Jigga, what is a nuclear reactor? He's just like this suckers. What this this you fucking

2234
02:23:39,420 --> 02:23:41,420
plutonium

2235
02:23:42,460 --> 02:23:45,940
I trade I trade them a shell of a bomb with some

2236
02:23:48,100 --> 02:23:51,060
He's like and he goes and he just hears me

2237
02:23:51,340 --> 02:23:57,500
He sees a fucking Volkswagen fucking van come out. He goes he goes. Oh, no, they found me he goes who found you?

2238
02:23:57,500 --> 02:23:59,500
I think

2239
02:24:02,580 --> 02:24:05,580
He's just like oh man the Libyans are here and the fucking terrorists like

2240
02:24:06,780 --> 02:24:10,660
They fucking gun down crackhead motherfucker and he's hitting the gun

2241
02:24:11,500 --> 02:24:13,500
So he turns over to Marty. Yeah

2242
02:24:20,180 --> 02:24:23,580
So they fucking gets in a time machine goes back to 1955

2243
02:24:23,580 --> 02:24:30,100
I think 55 so whoa, he goes back down fuck. He's just like wait a minute. What's going on here, man?

2244
02:24:30,140 --> 02:24:34,020
It's the 1950s. So he goes wait a minute. I gotta cover this shit

2245
02:24:34,020 --> 02:24:38,940
So he covers the fucking domain with a fucking blanket and he's just like, all right, that'll stop it

2246
02:24:38,940 --> 02:24:45,020
So he goes down the street. He's walking down the street with his fucking stupid puffer vest on that looks like fucking life preserves

2247
02:24:45,020 --> 02:24:47,700
We got it. We got it back up. He went to the barn. Oh, yeah

2248
02:24:47,700 --> 02:24:52,700
And he fucking goes to the barn in the barn. He crashes the fucking thing into the barn and these motherfuckers come out

2249
02:24:52,700 --> 02:24:56,260
He's wearing a fucking hazmat gear and these motherfuckers from the 50s come out

2250
02:25:00,260 --> 02:25:04,740
Shotgun blows a fucking hole in the wall and he's just like, yo man, and he's just like

2251
02:25:06,740 --> 02:25:10,000
He ran over one of the pine trees and it's a pine ball

2252
02:25:11,300 --> 02:25:17,180
Fucking like fuck man. This is fucking crazy man. It's right the fucking DeLorean out. He's like aliens

2253
02:25:17,980 --> 02:25:19,620
So he fucking drives in the town

2254
02:25:19,620 --> 02:25:25,140
He covers it with a blanket starts going jogging in the fucking town. He's wearing a stupid life-preferred for fucking jacket

2255
02:25:25,140 --> 02:25:30,540
He's like, oh, yeah, I'm walking in the fucking town. So he's walking in the town and he goes, huh?

2256
02:25:30,540 --> 02:25:35,240
So these fucking looks up in the tree. There's a dude with fucking binoculars looking at some shit chains

2257
02:25:35,240 --> 02:25:40,100
No before that he goes into the uh, the diner afterwards. Oh

2258
02:25:40,620 --> 02:25:44,820
Does he yeah, so he looks up he's like he's a peeping Tom

2259
02:25:46,140 --> 02:25:48,140
Hey, the guy goes, oh

2260
02:25:48,140 --> 02:25:51,540
He falls out of the fucking tree then Marty goes what the fuck are you doing?

2261
02:25:51,540 --> 02:25:56,340
And the guy runs away then Marty gets hit by a fucking car because apparently people in the past still hate him

2262
02:25:56,340 --> 02:26:01,060
Yeah, so he fucking wakes up in a fucking thing and he feels like his money. Here's his mom voice

2263
02:26:01,060 --> 02:26:04,260
He goes you just had a bad dream. Yeah, and somebody's rubbing his leg

2264
02:26:07,500 --> 02:26:10,520
What's going on she's like, oh you're safe back in

2265
02:26:11,340 --> 02:26:13,340
1955 he wakes up. He's like what?

2266
02:26:13,340 --> 02:26:17,780
Hey, mr. Calvin Klein goes why you keep calling me Calvin Klein man

2267
02:26:18,300 --> 02:26:20,580
On your underwear he goes what?

2268
02:26:21,580 --> 02:26:23,580
Whoa, my mom's hot

2269
02:26:24,660 --> 02:26:30,580
Downstairs like are you sorry? Would you jump ship? He's just like what are you talking about? The wife preserver in the Navy

2270
02:26:31,580 --> 02:26:33,580
How does mom's learn to take his fucking pants off?

2271
02:26:36,220 --> 02:26:42,340
His mom tried to fuck him when he was sleeping so his mom's technically a fucking rapist and his mom's like smoking hot

2272
02:26:42,340 --> 02:26:48,620
Oh, she is fucking smoke Leah Thompson. Oh, I would do things so fucking he goes downstairs and he looks down at the TV

2273
02:26:48,620 --> 02:26:52,980
He's like, you know, I've seen this one. This one's a real one. It's like what's a rerun?

2274
02:26:52,980 --> 02:26:55,920
What do you mean? Oh, what do you mean? I'm new

2275
02:26:58,300 --> 02:27:02,460
Well, that's that's interesting so then he's just like, okay, I gotta go

2276
02:27:02,460 --> 02:27:07,940
He's just like you can stay in my room Marty and he's just like I know my mom used to these bars kid

2277
02:27:07,940 --> 02:27:12,540
Yeah, so he's fucking just like yeah get used to these bars kid

2278
02:27:12,540 --> 02:27:17,460
Fucking goes out into the street and he goes out he goes. Oh man. I gotta go see doc

2279
02:27:17,700 --> 02:27:21,140
So he fuck no, no, is this when he goes to the diner? Yeah, he goes to the diner now

2280
02:27:21,140 --> 02:27:23,380
He goes hey, can I get a Pepsi free?

2281
02:27:23,380 --> 02:27:26,940
He just goes if you want a Pepsi you're gonna have to pay for it

2282
02:27:26,940 --> 02:27:29,740
And he just goes can I just get something with no sugar in it?

2283
02:27:29,740 --> 02:27:32,900
He gives him a fucking coffee. He's like what the fuck is going on?

2284
02:27:32,900 --> 02:27:38,100
So he drinks the coffee goes over to the phone book looks up crackhead Brown. He goes there

2285
02:27:38,100 --> 02:27:41,020
He is he rips the fucking number out of bone book and goes falls

2286
02:27:50,660 --> 02:27:57,340
So let me fucking ghost to the goddamn fucking town fucking crackhead and he's still a town crackhead even back then

2287
02:27:57,340 --> 02:27:59,340
He didn't lose the crackhead

2288
02:27:59,340 --> 02:28:02,900
exact same as he did 30 years and he goes

2289
02:28:04,100 --> 02:28:10,240
I'm here from the future goes. All right, then who's the president? He goes Ronald Reagan. He goes the actor and he goes

2290
02:28:10,240 --> 02:28:13,740
You're fucking out of your mind. He goes. No, dude. You got the flux capacitor

2291
02:28:20,780 --> 02:28:26,060
He's fucking goes out he's like, whoa, this is fucking crazy and he goes hold on a minute

2292
02:28:26,060 --> 02:28:29,480
I think I I think I stopped my parents from meeting goes

2293
02:28:29,480 --> 02:28:32,300
What the fuck do you mean you stop your parents from meeting goes?

2294
02:28:32,300 --> 02:28:37,460
Yeah, my mom tried to fuck me and then my dad just ran away. He goes you gotta go talk to your dad

2295
02:28:37,980 --> 02:28:43,100
Before that they're looking at the video. All right. Yeah, this is amazing a portable video studio

2296
02:28:43,100 --> 02:28:57,420
Yeah, so he's like we wait back it up. Yeah

2297
02:28:57,420 --> 02:29:03,780
So he's fucking running through this shit. I'm fucking sweating man. I'm getting into this shit. I'm fucking out of my mind

2298
02:29:03,780 --> 02:29:06,060
I'm almost as crazy as Doc Brown man

2299
02:29:06,060 --> 02:29:10,380
So I'm fucking doing this shit. Fucking Doc Brown's like you need to get your dad to fuck your mom

2300
02:29:10,380 --> 02:29:18,580
Fuck man fucking keeps going and he goes, all right fucking George and George is sitting in his fucking house

2301
02:29:18,620 --> 02:29:22,740
He's just like, oh man, I'm fucking reading my fucking nerd space novels

2302
02:29:22,740 --> 02:29:27,820
So he fucking puts on his goddamn hazmat suit puts on rocket van Halen into his dad's ears

2303
02:29:27,820 --> 02:29:37,460
He's just like, what is this noise? So then he just goes, I'm Darth Vader from the planet Xenu if you don't fuck this bitch

2304
02:29:37,460 --> 02:29:40,460
I'm gonna come back and melt your fucking brain

2305
02:29:40,460 --> 02:29:42,460
He's like, okay

2306
02:29:42,460 --> 02:29:45,180
And George McClye runs out of his fucking house the next day

2307
02:29:45,180 --> 02:29:49,580
He's like I have to do I have to fuck this bitch or an alien is gonna fucking kill me

2308
02:29:49,580 --> 02:29:55,860
He's like, maybe you don't say that so then he goes to the fucking diner again and then Biff big old Biff comes in

2309
02:29:55,860 --> 02:30:06,340
He's like, hey McFly! They both turn and they're like, he's just like, I thought I told you to do my fucking homework man

2310
02:30:06,340 --> 02:30:08,740
So he's just like, oh I'll get it to you tomorrow

2311
02:30:08,740 --> 02:30:13,740
He goes, hello! Hello! Anybody in there McFly?

2312
02:30:13,740 --> 02:30:17,140
He goes, oh don't Biff I'll get it for you

2313
02:30:17,140 --> 02:30:22,340
And then this fucking bitch who's actually his mom, goddamn gorgeous is sitting in the fucking chair over there

2314
02:30:22,340 --> 02:30:26,340
Biff goes over, he's like, hey sweetheart I wanna fuck yo ass

2315
02:30:26,340 --> 02:30:29,340
And she's like, get out of my way Biff and then fucking McFly

2316
02:30:29,340 --> 02:30:30,340
Fuck your own back

2317
02:30:30,340 --> 02:30:33,340
Get your meat paws off of me

2318
02:30:33,340 --> 02:30:36,340
He's like, what do you mean? You're asking for it

2319
02:30:36,340 --> 02:30:38,340
And then she's like, get off of me Biff

2320
02:30:38,340 --> 02:30:41,340
I'm gonna make you my wife, buddy

2321
02:30:41,340 --> 02:30:44,340
I forgot about that line

2322
02:30:44,340 --> 02:30:49,340
So then this motherfucker gets up, he grabs that fucking Marty McFly who's also like 5 foot 2

2323
02:30:49,340 --> 02:30:52,340
Grabs this 6 foot 7 guy and he goes, hey man

2324
02:30:52,340 --> 02:30:55,340
What are you looking at, budhead?

2325
02:30:55,340 --> 02:30:58,340
So he turns around and he's just like, whoa brother

2326
02:30:58,340 --> 02:31:01,340
And they try to fight each other and he goes out

2327
02:31:01,340 --> 02:31:05,340
He's like running in the street, Biff gets in his fucking shitty ass fucking car

2328
02:31:05,340 --> 02:31:08,340
He's driving down the street and he's like, I'm gonna get to you motherfucker

2329
02:31:08,340 --> 02:31:11,340
And he's fucking riding down the goddamn street

2330
02:31:11,340 --> 02:31:13,340
And fucking, he's at Marty McFly, steals a skateboard

2331
02:31:13,340 --> 02:31:17,340
No, he runs over to this kid who has his fucking scooter and he goes, I'm gonna break your fucking scooter

2332
02:31:17,340 --> 02:31:21,340
And snaps it in half, grabs the fucking skateboard part

2333
02:31:21,340 --> 02:31:24,340
And he starts skating and the kid's like, what the fuck is this shit?

2334
02:31:24,340 --> 02:31:29,340
So they fucking start doing that shit, fucking then Biff crashes into manure, shit everywhere

2335
02:31:29,340 --> 02:31:34,340
So then fucking, I fucking hate manure, manure, blah

2336
02:31:34,340 --> 02:31:38,340
So then fucking, then his mom comes out super fucking horny

2337
02:31:38,340 --> 02:31:41,340
Just goes, I'm gonna fuck that guy

2338
02:31:41,340 --> 02:31:44,340
And then she's like, shit

2339
02:31:44,340 --> 02:31:48,340
So then he goes, alright, the dance is good, she goes, will you go to the dance with me?

2340
02:31:48,340 --> 02:31:52,340
I wanna fuck your ass, I'm gonna peg you

2341
02:31:52,340 --> 02:31:54,340
I miss that part

2342
02:31:54,340 --> 02:31:58,340
So then this motherfucker is just sitting there and he goes, alright

2343
02:31:58,340 --> 02:32:01,340
And then Doc Brown's like, you gotta get your dad to fuck your mom

2344
02:32:01,340 --> 02:32:04,340
And he's just like, no man, I don't know how to fucking do that

2345
02:32:04,340 --> 02:32:06,340
So then he's just like, alright

2346
02:32:06,340 --> 02:32:10,340
And then he's like, you gotta take him to the fish under the sea dads

2347
02:32:10,340 --> 02:32:13,340
The fish under the sea, enchantment under the sea dads

2348
02:32:13,340 --> 02:32:15,340
And he's just like, alright

2349
02:32:15,340 --> 02:32:18,340
And he just goes, I'll get you a soup motherfucker

2350
02:32:18,340 --> 02:32:20,340
And then he's like, I'm a crookhead

2351
02:32:20,340 --> 02:32:21,340
So then he's like, alright

2352
02:32:21,340 --> 02:32:24,340
So then he goes fucking to the fucking thing

2353
02:32:24,340 --> 02:32:28,340
And he's sitting there and then fucking all these motherfuckers are hanging out outside

2354
02:32:28,340 --> 02:32:30,340
And he fucking parks with his mom

2355
02:32:30,340 --> 02:32:33,340
So he parks with his fucking mom in the fucking thing

2356
02:32:33,340 --> 02:32:36,340
And she's like, I've only, I've parked before with a man

2357
02:32:36,340 --> 02:32:38,340
He's like, what are you talking about?

2358
02:32:38,340 --> 02:32:41,340
She goes, don't think I'm a little girl anymore

2359
02:32:41,340 --> 02:32:44,340
And her tits are like duct taped together

2360
02:32:44,340 --> 02:32:46,340
Fucking puffing out

2361
02:32:46,340 --> 02:32:49,340
And she's just like, she takes a swig of whiskey and money

2362
02:32:49,340 --> 02:32:50,340
And she's like, what the fuck are you doing?

2363
02:32:50,340 --> 02:32:53,340
She goes, come on, I spashed it from the old lady's liquor cabinet

2364
02:32:53,340 --> 02:32:56,340
I want to fucking so hard right now

2365
02:32:56,340 --> 02:32:59,340
And he's just like, you're in a bad position where you're supposed to do something

2366
02:32:59,340 --> 02:33:02,340
And it's not like a fire for me

2367
02:33:02,340 --> 02:33:04,340
And he's just like, he's basically saying

2368
02:33:04,340 --> 02:33:08,340
I'm not supposed to fuck my mom, but I kinda wanna fuck my mom

2369
02:33:08,340 --> 02:33:10,340
So then he's just like, alright

2370
02:33:10,340 --> 02:33:11,340
And then she fucking kisses him

2371
02:33:11,340 --> 02:33:14,340
And he's just like, and she goes, when I kissed you

2372
02:33:14,340 --> 02:33:17,340
It's like I was kissing my brother

2373
02:33:17,340 --> 02:33:20,340
And then his fucking face looks like he fucking just saw God

2374
02:33:20,340 --> 02:33:23,340
He's just like, yeah, I get it, man

2375
02:33:23,340 --> 02:33:25,340
Good thing she started off slow

2376
02:33:25,340 --> 02:33:26,340
Yeah

2377
02:33:26,340 --> 02:33:29,340
Didn't make it to like third base first

2378
02:33:29,340 --> 02:33:32,340
He's like, we did that

2379
02:33:32,340 --> 02:33:35,340
And then he's just like, he's like, okay, okay, finally

2380
02:33:35,340 --> 02:33:37,340
Fucking Georgia Fly's gonna come in and save me

2381
02:33:37,340 --> 02:33:40,340
It turns around, it's fucking Biff

2382
02:33:40,340 --> 02:33:43,340
And Biff's just like, I told you I'd be your butt head

2383
02:33:43,340 --> 02:33:44,340
And he fucking threw the guy

2384
02:33:44,340 --> 02:33:46,340
And he fucking threw Marty

2385
02:33:46,340 --> 02:33:47,340
And he's just punching him in the face and shit

2386
02:33:47,340 --> 02:33:49,340
And he's just like, oh, don't shoot

2387
02:33:49,340 --> 02:33:52,340
And she comes out, fucking gets a sick titch shot going on

2388
02:33:52,340 --> 02:33:55,340
And she's just like, oh, look at them titties

2389
02:33:55,340 --> 02:33:56,340
I'm gonna rape this bitch

2390
02:33:56,340 --> 02:33:59,340
So he jumps in there and he's just like, oh, I'm gonna

2391
02:33:59,340 --> 02:34:00,340
I'm gonna slither

2392
02:34:00,340 --> 02:34:04,340
And as a child I was like, wow, this is crazy

2393
02:34:04,340 --> 02:34:05,340
This movie is nuts

2394
02:34:05,340 --> 02:34:08,340
So then George McFly comes over

2395
02:34:08,340 --> 02:34:10,340
And he opens the door and he realizes that it's Biff

2396
02:34:10,340 --> 02:34:11,340
And it's not Marty

2397
02:34:11,340 --> 02:34:13,340
He's like, oh, fuck, man

2398
02:34:13,340 --> 02:34:15,340
He's just like, George, help me, please

2399
02:34:15,340 --> 02:34:17,340
And Biff's like, get out of here, man

2400
02:34:17,340 --> 02:34:19,340
You better get out of here

2401
02:34:19,340 --> 02:34:20,340
And he's just like, no, Biff

2402
02:34:20,340 --> 02:34:22,340
You get your damn hands off

2403
02:34:22,340 --> 02:34:25,340
And he punches him

2404
02:34:29,340 --> 02:34:32,340
So he fucking punches Biff's out for right now

2405
02:34:32,340 --> 02:34:36,340
But then, oh, man, Marty McFly got locked in a trunk

2406
02:34:36,340 --> 02:34:38,340
And then these black guys who are the magicians

2407
02:34:38,340 --> 02:34:40,340
By a bunch of reefer addicts

2408
02:34:40,340 --> 02:34:43,340
Yeah, and he fucking, he comes in and he's just like, hey

2409
02:34:43,340 --> 02:34:46,340
What are you talking to? Spook quotations

2410
02:34:46,340 --> 02:34:50,340
And he just goes, huh, who you calling spook quotations?

2411
02:34:50,340 --> 02:34:52,340
Pepperwood, Peckerwood

2412
02:34:52,340 --> 02:34:55,340
And he goes, yo, man, I don't want to mess with no reefer addicts

2413
02:34:55,340 --> 02:34:58,340
And then he's just like, and he goes, yo, are you all right?

2414
02:34:58,340 --> 02:35:01,340
And there he's like, I'm gonna, can you just lock the deal with me?

2415
02:35:01,340 --> 02:35:03,340
I'm locked in the trunk

2416
02:35:03,340 --> 02:35:05,340
And they're like, all right, man, we're black

2417
02:35:05,340 --> 02:35:07,340
So we know how to open a trunk without fucking keys

2418
02:35:07,340 --> 02:35:09,340
Because this movie's raced us to shit

2419
02:35:09,340 --> 02:35:11,340
So they fucking get him out

2420
02:35:11,340 --> 02:35:14,340
And the fucking lead guy, the lead guitarist cuts his hand

2421
02:35:14,340 --> 02:35:18,340
He's like, oh, man, I can't even play no more

2422
02:35:18,340 --> 02:35:21,340
And he just goes, listen, buddy, I got it

2423
02:35:21,340 --> 02:35:23,340
Suddenly goes back in

2424
02:35:23,340 --> 02:35:25,340
And then fucking

2425
02:35:25,340 --> 02:35:26,340
Hold on, hold on, hold on

2426
02:35:26,340 --> 02:35:28,340
I get the song

2427
02:35:28,340 --> 02:35:29,340
I got it

2428
02:35:29,340 --> 02:35:31,340
You got to do Earth Angel first

2429
02:35:31,340 --> 02:35:33,340
You got to do Earth Angel first

2430
02:35:33,340 --> 02:35:34,340
Yeah, dude

2431
02:35:34,340 --> 02:35:36,340
So fucking he gets up on the stage

2432
02:35:36,340 --> 02:35:38,340
And he's fucking playing his guitar

2433
02:35:38,340 --> 02:35:41,340
Because, you know, this is where the movie goes full circle

2434
02:35:41,340 --> 02:35:44,340
Because he was kicked out of his own school's fucking prom

2435
02:35:44,340 --> 02:35:46,340
Because he wasn't able to do the band for that

2436
02:35:46,340 --> 02:35:47,340
He was real upset

2437
02:35:47,340 --> 02:35:49,340
So we actually get to play in a prom

2438
02:35:49,340 --> 02:35:52,340
And he's sitting there and he's just like, whoa, okay

2439
02:35:52,340 --> 02:35:54,340
I get to play in a band

2440
02:35:54,340 --> 02:35:55,340
And he's just like, all right

2441
02:35:55,340 --> 02:35:58,340
So he sees his mom and his dad hanging out down there

2442
02:35:58,340 --> 02:36:00,340
He takes a picture of his brother who still disappeared

2443
02:36:00,340 --> 02:36:02,340
And he's just like, what the fuck's going on?

2444
02:36:02,340 --> 02:36:04,340
And he goes, all right, I'm going to play Earth Angel

2445
02:36:04,340 --> 02:36:05,340
And this motherfucker comes up and he goes,

2446
02:36:05,340 --> 02:36:08,340
Hey, I'm going to take this dance from you, McFly

2447
02:36:08,340 --> 02:36:09,340
And he's just like

2448
02:36:09,340 --> 02:36:11,340
Ha ha ha ha ha

2449
02:36:11,340 --> 02:36:13,340
Ha ha ha ha

2450
02:36:13,340 --> 02:36:15,340
And he gets fucking rocked by fucking McFly

2451
02:36:15,340 --> 02:36:16,340
McFly's like, I got this

2452
02:36:16,340 --> 02:36:18,340
Then, boom, all the pictures come back

2453
02:36:18,340 --> 02:36:21,340
So then fucking McFly's playing Earth Angel

2454
02:36:21,340 --> 02:36:23,340
And then they fucking kiss

2455
02:36:23,340 --> 02:36:25,340
And that's what seals the deal

2456
02:36:25,340 --> 02:36:27,340
And then he's like, oh, fuck, man

2457
02:36:27,340 --> 02:36:30,340
He goes, all right, Earth Angel's their song

2458
02:36:30,340 --> 02:36:32,340
I got to play Earth Angel

2459
02:36:32,340 --> 02:36:34,340
So he's playing Earth Angel

2460
02:36:34,340 --> 02:36:36,340
He's sitting there, he's strumming on a guitar

2461
02:36:36,340 --> 02:36:39,340
And then fucking, then George waves at him

2462
02:36:39,340 --> 02:36:41,340
He's like, thanks, buddy

2463
02:36:41,340 --> 02:36:43,340
I really appreciate it

2464
02:36:43,340 --> 02:36:45,340
I get this sick piece of tail

2465
02:36:45,340 --> 02:36:47,340
Ha ha ha ha ha

2466
02:36:47,340 --> 02:36:49,340
Wow, she's way out of my fucking league

2467
02:36:49,340 --> 02:36:51,340
Ha ha ha ha

2468
02:36:51,340 --> 02:36:53,340
So then hit the big one

2469
02:36:53,340 --> 02:36:56,340
So then he finally gets to play the song that he wants to play

2470
02:36:56,340 --> 02:36:58,340
Then comes out

2471
02:36:58,340 --> 02:37:00,340
Sonny B. Goode

2472
02:37:00,340 --> 02:37:03,340
And then he's like, fuck, man, this is fantastic

2473
02:37:03,340 --> 02:37:04,340
Then fucking ricks it

2474
02:37:04,340 --> 02:37:06,340
This is an oldie but a goodie

2475
02:37:06,340 --> 02:37:08,340
It's an oldie where I come from

2476
02:37:08,340 --> 02:37:10,340
Ha ha ha ha ha

2477
02:37:10,340 --> 02:37:12,340
You're listening for that new sound?

2478
02:37:12,340 --> 02:37:14,340
Well, listen to this

2479
02:37:14,340 --> 02:37:16,340
Uncle Marvin, your cousin

2480
02:37:16,340 --> 02:37:18,340
Marvin, your cousin

2481
02:37:18,340 --> 02:37:20,340
Listen to this

2482
02:37:20,340 --> 02:37:22,340
Ha ha ha ha

2483
02:37:22,340 --> 02:37:24,340
They're all dancing

2484
02:37:24,340 --> 02:37:27,340
And he starts doing a fucking sick ass riff on it

2485
02:37:27,340 --> 02:37:29,340
And then he breaks from Johnny B. Goode into Van Halen

2486
02:37:29,340 --> 02:37:30,340
Yeah, and they're like

2487
02:37:30,340 --> 02:37:32,340
Starts doing Eruption

2488
02:37:32,340 --> 02:37:35,340
And these motherfuckers in the crowd are like, what the fuck is going on?

2489
02:37:35,340 --> 02:37:37,340
He goes, maybe that's a little out of your hands

2490
02:37:37,340 --> 02:37:39,340
But your kids are gonna love it

2491
02:37:39,340 --> 02:37:41,340
And they're like, okay

2492
02:37:41,340 --> 02:37:44,340
And then fucking his mom comes out and goes, well, that was some interesting music playing

2493
02:37:44,340 --> 02:37:47,340
Marvin, that was interesting music

2494
02:37:47,340 --> 02:37:49,340
I think I'm gonna go home with George

2495
02:37:49,340 --> 02:37:51,340
He's like, yeah, yeah, do that

2496
02:37:51,340 --> 02:37:53,340
You're a fucking freak

2497
02:37:53,340 --> 02:37:55,340
And he goes, yeah, you do that, go fuck my dad

2498
02:37:55,340 --> 02:37:57,340
So then she's like

2499
02:37:57,340 --> 02:37:59,340
She's like, alright

2500
02:37:59,340 --> 02:38:01,340
She goes, you know, I think I like the name

2501
02:38:01,340 --> 02:38:03,340
Marty, and he goes, hey, listen

2502
02:38:03,340 --> 02:38:05,340
If you, uh, ever had a

2503
02:38:05,340 --> 02:38:07,340
Kid and his name's Marty

2504
02:38:07,340 --> 02:38:09,340
And he sets fire to the living room rug

2505
02:38:09,340 --> 02:38:11,340
Go easy on him

2506
02:38:11,340 --> 02:38:13,340
And you're like, whatever the fuck that means

2507
02:38:13,340 --> 02:38:15,340
So then he goes

2508
02:38:15,340 --> 02:38:17,340
Wait a minute, I gotta get back to

2509
02:38:17,340 --> 02:38:19,340
1985

2510
02:38:19,340 --> 02:38:21,340
I got the lightning ball, I forgot all about that

2511
02:38:21,340 --> 02:38:23,340
One fucking lightning ball

2512
02:38:23,340 --> 02:38:25,340
So then he goes, alright, fuck

2513
02:38:25,340 --> 02:38:27,340
So he gets there and fucking

2514
02:38:27,340 --> 02:38:29,340
Doc Brown's there, he's like

2515
02:38:29,340 --> 02:38:31,340
Marty, what's going on?

2516
02:38:31,340 --> 02:38:33,340
And he's just like, I gotta get to the fucking thing

2517
02:38:33,340 --> 02:38:35,340
And he's just like, alright, we're gonna get this shit set up

2518
02:38:35,340 --> 02:38:37,340
And he's like, oh fuck, it got unplugged

2519
02:38:37,340 --> 02:38:39,340
And he's just like

2520
02:38:39,340 --> 02:38:41,340
The lightning bolt's coming

2521
02:38:41,340 --> 02:38:45,340
Fucking face gets stretched out

2522
02:38:45,340 --> 02:38:47,340
Like a fucking cartoon character

2523
02:38:47,340 --> 02:38:49,340
He goes, wait a minute

2524
02:38:49,340 --> 02:38:51,340
Before I go back in time

2525
02:38:51,340 --> 02:38:53,340
I have to tell you about the future

2526
02:38:53,340 --> 02:38:55,340
He's like, no

2527
02:38:55,340 --> 02:38:57,340
Don't tell me about the future

2528
02:38:57,340 --> 02:38:59,340
I have to tell you about the future

2529
02:38:59,340 --> 02:39:01,340
He goes, no

2530
02:39:01,340 --> 02:39:03,340
So he fucking leaves him

2531
02:39:03,340 --> 02:39:05,340
In his coat pocket or some shit

2532
02:39:05,340 --> 02:39:07,340
And then he's like, whoa, man

2533
02:39:07,340 --> 02:39:09,340
He fucking starts driving

2534
02:39:09,340 --> 02:39:11,340
The DeLorean, he gotta get up to 88 miles per hour

2535
02:39:11,340 --> 02:39:13,340
He's gotta hit quick, going fast

2536
02:39:13,340 --> 02:39:15,340
So he's going fast, going quick

2537
02:39:15,340 --> 02:39:17,340
And then all of a sudden, oh man

2538
02:39:17,340 --> 02:39:19,340
The cord's still unplugged

2539
02:39:19,340 --> 02:39:21,340
Doc bounds up on the clock

2540
02:39:21,340 --> 02:39:23,340
He's like, oh fuck, man, what do I do?

2541
02:39:23,340 --> 02:39:25,340
So he goes down, he's about to plug it in

2542
02:39:25,340 --> 02:39:27,340
And then, boom, lightning strikes the fucking clock tower

2543
02:39:27,340 --> 02:39:29,340
Zip, oh no

2544
02:39:29,340 --> 02:39:31,340
He goes, boom, right back in the future

2545
02:39:31,340 --> 02:39:33,340
And he wakes up, he's like

2546
02:39:33,340 --> 02:39:35,340
Whoa, I'm in the future again

2547
02:39:35,340 --> 02:39:37,340
And then he's like, oh no, Doc got shot by the Libyans

2548
02:39:37,340 --> 02:39:39,340
And they fucking drive away

2549
02:39:39,340 --> 02:39:41,340
And he goes, I actually forgot

2550
02:39:41,340 --> 02:39:43,340
I'm like, what the fuck does he have to tell him again?

2551
02:39:43,340 --> 02:39:45,340
He's like, oh yeah, he got shot by the fucking Libyans

2552
02:39:45,340 --> 02:39:47,340
So he goes back, and he goes

2553
02:39:47,340 --> 02:39:49,340
Well, I did listen to you

2554
02:39:49,340 --> 02:39:51,340
And he goes

2555
02:39:51,340 --> 02:39:53,340
Oh, Doc

2556
02:39:53,340 --> 02:39:55,340
And he goes fucking back to his house

2557
02:39:55,340 --> 02:39:57,340
And his house is completely different

2558
02:39:57,340 --> 02:39:59,340
His dad's actually a cool guy, his mom's still hot

2559
02:39:59,340 --> 02:40:01,340
His brother's a fucking detective or lawyer

2560
02:40:01,340 --> 02:40:03,340
And his sister's like a fucking accountant or some shit

2561
02:40:03,340 --> 02:40:05,340
And he actually has a sick ass ride now

2562
02:40:05,340 --> 02:40:07,340
And he goes, can I take Carrie up to the fucking

2563
02:40:07,340 --> 02:40:09,340
What, of Jenny? Jennifer?

2564
02:40:09,340 --> 02:40:11,340
Jennifer up to the lake

2565
02:40:11,340 --> 02:40:13,340
And she's like, yeah, of course you can take her

2566
02:40:13,340 --> 02:40:15,340
And he's like, use the car

2567
02:40:15,340 --> 02:40:17,340
You're not a fucking pro

2568
02:40:17,340 --> 02:40:19,340
And he's like, what?

2569
02:40:19,340 --> 02:40:21,340
And he opens up the thing and Biff's fucking waxing it

2570
02:40:21,340 --> 02:40:23,340
And he's like, I just put on the second coat now

2571
02:40:23,340 --> 02:40:25,340
He goes, don't you con me, Biff

2572
02:40:25,340 --> 02:40:27,340
And he's just like, oh

2573
02:40:27,340 --> 02:40:29,340
I'm just putting on the second coat now

2574
02:40:29,340 --> 02:40:31,340
He said, just finishing the second coat

2575
02:40:31,340 --> 02:40:33,340
And he's like, no, I'm just starting the second coat

2576
02:40:33,340 --> 02:40:35,340
So then this motherfucker

2577
02:40:35,340 --> 02:40:37,340
Gets in his goddamn truck

2578
02:40:37,340 --> 02:40:39,340
He's like, alright, I'm gonna get in my fucking truck

2579
02:40:39,340 --> 02:40:41,340
And then I'm gonna go

2580
02:40:41,340 --> 02:40:43,340
And he's like, alright

2581
02:40:43,340 --> 02:40:45,340
So he fucking pulls up and then he goes

2582
02:40:45,340 --> 02:40:47,340
Before he gets into his truck, then fucking Doc Brown comes in

2583
02:40:47,340 --> 02:40:49,340
The fucking DeLorean's flying now

2584
02:40:49,340 --> 02:40:51,340
He's like, what the fuck? Fucking DeLorean comes down

2585
02:40:51,340 --> 02:40:53,340
He's just like, oh man

2586
02:40:53,340 --> 02:40:55,340
And he's just like, what's going on, Doc?

2587
02:40:55,340 --> 02:40:57,340
Wait, I think there's the part at the red light first

2588
02:40:57,340 --> 02:40:59,340
No, no, no, that was Back to the Future 2

2589
02:40:59,340 --> 02:41:01,340
Is it?

2590
02:41:01,340 --> 02:41:03,340
That was the second one, yeah

2591
02:41:03,340 --> 02:41:05,340
Next time on Unfrozen Cuts

2592
02:41:05,340 --> 02:41:07,340
Back to the Future 2

2593
02:41:07,340 --> 02:41:09,340
So this motherfucker fucking flies into DeLorean

2594
02:41:09,340 --> 02:41:11,340
He goes, yeah, every car flies in 2015

2595
02:41:13,340 --> 02:41:15,340
Geez, you think fucking

2596
02:41:15,340 --> 02:41:17,340
2015 we don't have flying cars?

2597
02:41:17,340 --> 02:41:19,340
Are you fucking retarded?

2598
02:41:19,340 --> 02:41:21,340
Starts shoving banana peels and shit in the back

2599
02:41:21,340 --> 02:41:23,340
It's Mr. Fusing, bro

2600
02:41:23,340 --> 02:41:25,340
What the fuck? He goes, it's not about the past

2601
02:41:25,340 --> 02:41:27,340
It's about your kids, Marty

2602
02:41:27,340 --> 02:41:29,340
He's like, what?

2603
02:41:29,340 --> 02:41:31,340
And he just goes, we're gonna go back

2604
02:41:31,340 --> 02:41:33,340
To the future

2605
02:41:33,340 --> 02:41:35,340
And he goes, to be continued

2606
02:41:35,340 --> 02:41:37,340
Dun dun dun dun dun

2607
02:41:37,340 --> 02:41:39,340
Dude, that was incredible

2608
02:41:39,340 --> 02:41:41,340
That was amazing

2609
02:41:41,340 --> 02:41:43,340
Oh god, I'm sweating

2610
02:41:43,340 --> 02:41:45,340
That was better than

2611
02:41:45,340 --> 02:41:47,340
It's my favorite movie and I couldn't have said it better than that

2612
02:41:49,340 --> 02:41:51,340
I want to go learn Johnny B. Good now, guitar

2613
02:41:51,340 --> 02:41:53,340
I'll learn on bass

2614
02:41:53,340 --> 02:41:55,340
I started learning it before

2615
02:41:55,340 --> 02:41:57,340
But I just got bored

2616
02:41:57,340 --> 02:41:59,340
Because it's fucking complicated

2617
02:41:59,340 --> 02:42:01,340
Oh my god

2618
02:42:01,340 --> 02:42:03,340
I think I'm going to take a smoke break

2619
02:42:03,340 --> 02:42:05,340
Yeah, I think

2620
02:42:05,340 --> 02:42:07,340
I think it's about

2621
02:42:07,340 --> 02:42:09,340
It's almost one o'clock

2622
02:42:09,340 --> 02:42:11,340
It's about time to pack it in

2623
02:42:11,340 --> 02:42:13,340
Well, thank you for listening

2624
02:42:13,340 --> 02:42:15,340
How long was that one?

2625
02:42:15,340 --> 02:42:17,340
Episode 47

2626
02:42:17,340 --> 02:42:19,340
Episode 10, brothers

2627
02:42:19,340 --> 02:42:21,340
We're on learnin' double digits now

2628
02:42:21,340 --> 02:42:23,340
Is it 10? Yeah, episode 10

2629
02:42:23,340 --> 02:42:25,340
Thank you guys for listening

2630
02:42:25,340 --> 02:42:27,340
As always, take care of yourselves

2631
02:42:27,340 --> 02:42:29,340
And each other

2632
02:42:29,340 --> 02:42:33,340
And I'll see you in the next one

2633
02:42:59,340 --> 02:43:01,340
Where the fuck did the pyramids come from?

2634
02:43:01,340 --> 02:43:03,340
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?

2635
02:43:03,340 --> 02:43:05,340
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?

2636
02:43:05,340 --> 02:43:07,340
Oh, they're killin'

2637
02:43:07,340 --> 02:43:09,340
They're killin' all the already born babies and sell them to the Chinese

2638
02:43:09,340 --> 02:43:11,340
Aliens exist

2639
02:43:11,340 --> 02:43:13,340
Somewhere in China

2640
02:43:13,340 --> 02:43:15,340
Alright, in some base

2641
02:43:15,340 --> 02:43:17,340
What the fuck?

2642
02:43:17,340 --> 02:43:19,340
There are super soldiers that are at least 9 or 10 feet tall

2643
02:43:19,340 --> 02:43:21,340
Okay?

2644
02:43:21,340 --> 02:43:23,340
They have dread

2645
02:43:23,340 --> 02:43:25,340
They're super soldiers

2646
02:43:25,340 --> 02:43:29,340
They're super aliens

2647
02:43:29,340 --> 02:43:31,340
I do not negotiate with terrorists

2648
02:43:31,340 --> 02:43:33,340
I do not listen to this

2649
02:43:33,340 --> 02:43:35,340
Take cover

2650
02:43:53,340 --> 02:43:55,340
Before my eyes

2651
02:43:55,340 --> 02:43:57,340
While holding their pulse

2652
02:43:57,340 --> 02:43:59,340
Feel them die of this virus

2653
02:43:59,340 --> 02:44:01,340
You feel bump bump bump

2654
02:44:01,340 --> 02:44:05,620
They're fucking gone. I've seen it happen. I think that the government has

2655
02:44:06,540 --> 02:44:08,540
Taken it to the next level with the birds

2656
02:44:12,260 --> 02:44:18,220
They know what birds are going to cross paths with you that you are going to be able to raise and they are gonna make

2657
02:44:18,220 --> 02:44:24,020
Them so fucking real they're gonna sink money into them because they know that if you put that motherfucker in a cage

2658
02:44:24,020 --> 02:44:26,020
They're gonna be a

2659
02:44:26,020 --> 02:44:33,620
You can cut it open you're gonna see blood got no circuitry, but let me tell you their technology which by the way

2660
02:44:33,620 --> 02:44:59,620
Big brother is the overlord

2661
02:45:03,620 --> 02:45:10,620
George Soros is an actual Nazi collaborator. Okay, I'm not fucking lying. It's fucking real. Okay, look it up

2662
02:45:10,620 --> 02:45:13,620
Look it up. He says that he was doing this shit. George Soros actually worked with the fucking Nazis during the Holocaust

2663
02:45:13,620 --> 02:45:19,620
He says that he was doing it just to survive, but he fucking loved it. He was having a great fucking time

2664
02:45:19,620 --> 02:45:33,620
George Soros is the fucking devil. Okay, he's not fucking doing this shit

2665
02:45:33,620 --> 02:45:49,620
George Soros is the fucking devil. Okay, he's not fucking doing this shit. George Soros is fucking evil. He's the actual fucking leader for all this shit. He's fucking fucked down a whole bunch of shit. Just don't fucking get it, okay?

2666
02:45:49,620 --> 02:46:04,620
Donald Trump is the fucking word person out there. Fuck Trump, right? Fuck Trump! He's not the actual fucking leader! It's George Soros, it's Bill Gates, it's fucking Elon Musk, it's everyone out there, everybody says it's Bill Gates

2667
02:46:04,620 --> 02:46:21,620
Elon Musk is so cool, he made a place for him, please. The actual government is trying. The actual true government, which is George Soros and all the fucking Nazis, is actually the one there who's fucking the Holocaust. The queer politicians are paid off by the fucking building. The pain, the fucking cost, the fucking-

2668
02:46:21,620 --> 02:46:48,620
I don't suck dicks, I just fuck hoes. Every time I see you, you see my coked nose. Fuck. And some flow going there. Yeah. Yeah, kill my father in your ass. Then I go and mow the grass. I'm the man of the house. You're just sitting lighted. Yeah.

2669
02:46:48,620 --> 02:47:04,620
As I sock my face to show it. He said, what you have will soon be yours, and what I have is already mine. About to pop ten shots of my brain. Enema, Vista.

2670
02:47:04,620 --> 02:47:26,620
I'll be Big Dig. Enema, Vista. Because I got the dinks. Enema. Big Doink, South Nolish. Enema, Vista. I hate myself and I'm afraid to show it. Ain't got nothing to it, boy, you know it.

2671
02:47:26,620 --> 02:47:43,620
Hurt me now but tears don't show. Hurt me, motherfucker, in my asshole. I don't came in. I don't come in men's butt.

2672
02:47:43,620 --> 02:48:08,620
I don't really fuck guys. I only fuck hoes. Fuck hoes. Fuck hoes. Fuck hoes. Fuck them. Fuck hoes.

2673
02:48:08,620 --> 02:48:27,620
What's another fucking good thing I could say? I went to the house and called me a name. I'm not a retard. Re-todd. Re-todd. Re-todd. Re-todd.

2674
02:48:27,620 --> 02:48:44,620
What the fuck, you guys? As I showed up, I asked him, what bus, you guys? What bus? You guys?

2675
02:48:44,620 --> 02:48:58,620
Captain, Captain Clausen comes over to me and he says, what bus, you guys? And I tell him, what bus? Number eight. You guys? But eight's on fire.

2676
02:48:58,620 --> 02:49:27,620
Burned into the ground. Never, never to be sought again. At the bottom of the ocean, the Titanic has sank. Now we'll never know what bus I am. Lost in the agony and despair of the eternal life. The emptiness of not knowing the bus that I am.

2677
02:49:27,620 --> 02:49:47,620
As he pulled his pants down, his dick was showing. I'm not gay, but $20, $20. $20. Buy a lot of coke. $20. $20. With all that white stuff around your nose, boy, he says to me, $20. $20.

2678
02:49:47,620 --> 02:50:09,620
I ain't no police. I ain't tell the police. Fang showing. Devil blowing my dick. Sucking my dick and my cock. Yeah, I come blood.

2679
02:50:09,620 --> 02:50:27,620
I come blood. I come blood. It's like a nightmare in my brain. Everything's all insane. It's insane. Bring the motherfucking ruckus. Bring the motherfucking ruckus back to my head.

2680
02:50:27,620 --> 02:50:41,620
Because if you don't, then I'll be fucking dead. Put a nine in my head. Pull that trigger. Now I'm dead. Now I'm dead. Now I'm dead.

