The following program is intended for mature
audiences and may cause cancer in at -risk populations.
Viewer discretion is advised. For all we know,
robots have souls. We just don't know if they
do or don't. How do you know? Have you ever been
a cyborg or a robot? You think we were the first
ones to inhabit this planet? Fuck no. No, we
are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole. Yes,
we are. There's people out there with some really
dumb thoughts. Extended episode. Where the fuck
did the spearmen come from? Where the fuck did
Stonehenge come from? You're telling me that
they didn't die and become ghosts? They're killing
all the already born babies and sell them to
the Chinese. Aliens exist. Somewhere in China.
some days what the fuck there are super soldiers
super soldiers then they are extraterrestrials
they are aliens This guy's been talked about
for years. You're asking, we have Texas, we have
this, we have all of the things. And are people
still talking about this guy, this creep? I mean,
I can't believe you're asking a question on Epstein
at a time like this when we're having some of
the greatest success and awesome content. Yo.
Oh, shit. Oh, shit. We're back. Welcome to Underwood
Podcast. Here we go again. Episode 113. We got
KC Tyler and Allie Mac here. Welcome back, Allie
Mac. I know. I feel like it's a recurring theme
of me being here pretty consistently for a couple
weeks, then disappearing for... Two or three
months and coming back. Tyler, now we're on to
Epstein Never Existed. Epstein Never Existed.
Who is this Epstein character? Never heard of
her. Oh, it's great. It's like a liberal dream
come true this week. Just a bag of melting down.
Ghislaine, though, is real hot. She was like,
have you seen her? I've never seen a picture
of her, no. She's fucking banging. She's the
one who got incriminated in a bunch of the stuff
they already released, right? Yeah. Who I guess
is now filing an appeal that looks like it could
be going somewhere. Because now Trump's just
denying that they fucking exist. Which kind of
leaves her in a weird spot. It's like, okay,
so I didn't do anything wrong? I like when she
was like, oh, they were on your desk, but now
they don't exist. She was like, well, they said
that was everything to do with Epstein. That
wasn't the list. Like, there is no list. well
sure in all technicality it doesn't list the
names of people who have been there it's going
to be documents disclosing what's known about
people who were there and what's going on it's
not like it's got a table of contents where you
flip through oh steven hawking okay leonardo
like no you're not it's like the uh rfk mok files
where they just like don't say anything useful
well yeah because well they said okay all right
but uh they said uh Because they released it
in phases, which, by the way, I'm just going
to come out and say it here for anybody who doesn't
have their own free thinking abilities. If the
government is not just openly displaying documents,
it's because they have something to hide. We
shouldn't need to beg for MLK and JFK's files
to be released for fucking decades, and then
only once all the relevant parties are dead,
we get some semblance of truth. And it's 90 %
blacked out. FBI, that shit, they definitely
whacked MLK. CIA definitely whacked them. There's
room for interpretation, but a conspiracy occurred
with JFK. It most likely was the CIA. No, they
killed him. I mean, I agree with you. I think
that's what happened. But the thing is, is that
the files they released on those weren't even
genuine. They just said like, oh yeah, it was
Lee Harvey Oswald, and I can't remember the supposed
killer's name of MLK, but they said that he did
it too. And it was just a bunch of nonsense that
backed up their bullshit story, even though there
is so much evidence on those two cases. If people
were more... If people paid closer attention
to MLK and JFK, they would, they would realize
that this is what the Epstein files was back
then. Oh yeah. Especially cause like JFK, I mean
with MLK, um, he's been like posthumously not
saying that like he didn't do it. but essentially
that he didn't do it. And that happened in a
court of law. And then when it came to the JFK
thing, the CIA torched all of the evidence the
day before it was supposed to be presented in
court because it was stored in a CIA lockup.
So of course they're going to fucking get rid
of it. And then the third party board that was
investigating it, where they were supposed to
have that evidence presented in front of them,
concluded after it all vanished the day before
they were going to do it. They're like, yeah,
we don't have distinct proof, but in all likelihood,
there was a conspiracy to murder JFK. They can't
technically prove it, which is why it wasn't
a headline. Alex Jones, correct once again. Alex
Jones is always right. I think Trump's trying
to destroy the Epstein list, actually, which
he probably can't, because he lost half of his
supporters this week. People are like, yeah,
we don't like pedophiles. Casey, I think that...
You enjoy this. You're very happy that shit's
going wrong because you can say, you can do the
I was right dance. I never wanted to be right,
Tyler. I tried to prevent it. Look at the smile
that he has on his face right now. Tyler, I'm
sorry. Usually I like agreeing with you because
usually your points are more concise, but I genuinely
have to take Casey's side on this. And yes, you
might be a little smug because he's a Democrat,
but I don't even think it's that dude. I mean,
are you not pissed off as a Republican by what's
going on? I genuinely haven't been paying attention.
Well, like every fucking big fucking MAGA Trump
supporter I know is either really fucking quiet
right now or they're like, this is fucking unsupported.
I was never a MAGA supporter. As much as Casey
likes to say I was never a huge MAGA guy, I was
just like, he's the better of two options. I'm
not saying you are. I'm just saying I don't necessarily
think Casey's the better. I liked RFK. I liked
RFK, and I liked Vance better than Trump, actually.
I always liked Vance better than Trump. I knew
you weren't a huge MAGA. I'm not into fucking
Biden and all his antics that happened either.
this takes the cake i think for fucking uh for
trump though this is the first thing where like
ultimately i have tolerated him up to this point
where it was just like ah whatever like he does
his job i guess but like there's a lot of shit
like don't get me wrong the fucking tariffs pissed
me off i think that those were fucking stupid
i think that um this deportation thing might
i don't necessarily disagree with all of it but
it can be done a little bit better um i don't
agree on all of the foreign immigration policies
but regardless i still was like okay i'm not
i didn't i won't say i trusted him because like
the dude constantly lies through his teeth but
you know that's him but now when he's doing this
this is the most egregious case of like just
most aggregarious yeah just thinking that the
fucking people aggregarious at an aggregarious
angle like this has been like the most in your
face like Americans are just stupid and they're
going to believe anything I say. So why did every
Republican in the House voted to not release
the Epstein files? It was 211 to 210. Not one
Republican switched their mind to release the
Epstein files. I don't think that was in the
House, though. I thought the House actually was
showing a bipartisan movement. No, the House
has about 400 -something members, so it was 211
to 210, Republican to Democrat. That's orchestrated.
They knew that was going to be the final count.
I don't know. Dude, there's because the thing
is, is that I don't fully understand why it's
like, I mean, I guess I do because it's like,
you know, you're going to fucking really nail
it to Trump because in all likelihood, he probably
was there. I'm not going to sit here and say
that he was, but I doubt his name isn't at least
mentioned in. It's definitely mentioned. It's
definitely mentioned and probably... The only
mystery is whether it says or not he's actually
involved. I think this is also... The Diddy trial
is also upsetting to me. Yeah, because he's getting
out pretty much... He got tagged with a couple
charges, but they were all pretty small. He got
tagged with the smallest of the small charges
that he had. I think at most he's getting two
years. Which is crazy. That's so fucking crazy.
He did a lot of fucked up things, but he's just
like a freak. What did he actually get charged
with doing wrong? Fucking sex trafficking. Yeah,
sex trafficking. That's kind of bad. A lot of
rape -ish charges. I think there was a couple
cases of fucking kidnapping, right? Kidnapping.
It was coerced. Yeah, it wasn't necessarily kidnapping.
It was just he wasn't letting people leave, I
think. I can't remember the term for that. False
imprisonment. Yes, false imprisonment. It was
false imprisonment and like coercion. To to bring
people in type thing. Those are the two things
that he actually got charged with, I think. And
like the sex trafficking and sex trafficking
racketeering is what would have put him away
for a while. He got fucking. Well, those are
the ones. Those are the weird things, though,
because I always remembered thinking that to
myself, too. I never really did like a lot of
research into it, but I was kind of thinking
in the back of my head, like, did he actually
sex traffic or was he just a fucking animal that
did like a lot of. crazy perverted shit no he
trafficked because prostitution and and you know
pimping out yeah that counts as trafficking so
like even even if they were just standard prostitutes
that he was bringing in which they weren't but
even if they were just standard prostitutes he
was bringing in that's still sex trafficking
the thing that still just doesn't quite click
in my brain is what does bro need 10 ,000 bottles
of lubricant for? He's the lubricant. That is
crazy. He wants to be real slippery, but that's
what I'm saying. Even in his case, like he had
an indoor slip and slide, slip and slide, bro.
But bro, if you were like, even if you're throwing
these crazy fucking orgies, like I, everybody
makes the meme about like the fucking oil drum
filled with lubricant. It costs like 2000. I
feel like if you had one of those with a little
fucking, yeah, like, I want to get someone on
the podcast. who's been to an orgy. I think Dan
is the only one that could have been to an orgy.
I just feel like if you had one of those tins
of fucking lube with a tap on it, and then you
got one more in the closet in case you run out,
you're pretty much set. That's a lot of lube.
What do you need gallons of lubricant for? I
feel like one orgy would probably go through
maybe two bottles of lube. There's hundreds of
people there. still, an oil drum is more than
enough to get the job done, dude. You don't need
10 ,000 fucking bottles. The real question is,
if you got invited to a freak -off, would you
go? No. No. I'd be like, what the fuck? Absolutely
the fuck not. I'm flattered, really. I'm flattered,
but no. Trump actually abandoned his followers
this week. He said, if you disagree about the
Epstein list, are you still having questions?
He said, you're bad people and stupid. Those
were what he was quoted with. He said that, too.
But he basically was like, don't vote for me
anymore. He's like, you're not on my side if
you don't forget about the Epstein list. Well,
we don't need to vote for you again, dude, because
it's your fucking second term. Yeah, he abandoned
Tyler because Tyler doesn't... Tyler wants to
release the Epstein list, don't you, Tyler? I
just hope this fucking... Why do you say he abandoned
Tyler? I said that he was the best choice out
of the retards that we had. Okay. I think if
you listen to the episode where the election
happened, I think you said, quote, mourning in
America, but it's fine. Yeah, it's better than
that. So listen, we either had cut the dicks
off of children. Or not releasing Epstein files.
I think more what this is, guys, is that you
do, at least when you're in this basement here,
root for your politicians like they're a sports
team. And you both get really passionate when
your team gets a win. And I think that that was
Tyler then, and I think that that's you now.
That's what I'm doing. I'm not really like...
But you were, at least that episode, bro, you
were... Very much a drummer that day. That was
a sad day. It was a fucking funny day. Like I
said, I think the funniest timeline is what we
should be going for. However, I don't know if
I've said it on the podcast, but I've said it
in the group chat several times. I do think that
fucking politics is just Sesame Street for adults.
It's just two puppets talking to each other.
And who's the guy who's puppeteering? Do you
think that I should insert Tyler and Dan? Being
ecstatic about the Trump victory right here.
Casey refused to do one last week because he
was too sad. I was ecstatic. I can't tell you
how much I wrote in that goddamn group chat on
election night. Oh, man. It is daytime in America
again, boys. Welcome to the new golden age of
America. We're doomed either way. I'm so ready.
When Pennsylvania went red, I'm like, it's over.
It is fucking over. The Democrats are losing
every swing state. They lost every swing state.
They lost the House. And they lost the fucking
Senate. It's a beautiful day in America. God
bless this land. Wow. I knew it was bad. I didn't
know it was that bad. That would be pretty funny.
I don't think it's a fucking... Like I said,
I think all the politicians are in the fucking
same boat and it's just a bunch of puppet shows.
That's what I think. I think they're all bought
and paid for, both sides. And they're both bought
by the same fucking people. And they just tell
you different talking points. Because no matter
who wins, the fucking people who are controlling
everything, who are the real puppeteers, are
the ones who actually won. It doesn't matter.
It's all fucking sham. It's all fucking smoke
and mirrors. It's a puppet show. So while I do...
There's fucking Democrats on the Epstein list.
Fucking Bill Clinton's on that shit. I mean,
that's what I'm saying. Like, I do agree with
what you're saying. But ultimately... We don't
have any proof of that yet. There's no list that's
saying of who they're fucking taking orders from.
And while I don't think that there's people who
are higher than our president here, but the thing
is, is that this is just unforeseen in terms
of levels of just a straight up lie being told
by our government to us. Because it's not even
the fact that he's just lying about it. It's
the fact that there's not even an attempt. at
like covering it up and he's just truly just
going back on everything he said and expecting
people to the crazy thing the craziest thing
is dude is that there's people who fucking buy
it i went to dinner with my family today and
i hear two guys one of them was literally wearing
a confederate flag tank top and the other one
looked like he was about 800 pounds wearing a
harley davidson shirt they're both fucking showering
down on chicken wings drinking coors light after
coors light talking about like oh yeah no i don't
think everybody's just got to calm down like
Like, I don't know. Like, they totally had the
stance. And they were, like, shouting this and
having a discussion with people across the bar
who more had my stance. And part of me wanted
to get involved, but I was at a family dinner.
But it was just crazy that they were like, no,
it's just a hoax. All you fucking libs are mad.
And it's like, no, no. That's not fucking true.
It's not fucking true. Like, it's just. Just
show us what's fucking in there. I understand
their reasoning behind it. If this ever does
come out, the way that they're going to justify
it is they're going to say, well, there was so
many fucking politicians on this thing that it
would cause a crisis within our government because
of how many people would have to be removed from
power. I truly believe that that's the reasoning
behind it because that very well could be true
if enough of them were there. That that could
cause a huge problem to the infrastructure of
America if... Even 20 % of these fuckers are
on there, which I think the number is probably
higher. If I'm being honest, it's just like,
and you're going to have celebrities and all
this, but like, this is the one chance of like
fucking exposing or at least scratching the surface
of what's going on that we can't see is the people.
And it's just like right now it's the government
versus the people. I don't see it as, I don't
look through the party lines with it or anything
because both sides knew that it existed. Biden
had a part to play in it, too, because he also
didn't fucking release this shit. And he just
dodged it. They were saying, like, Democrats,
if he released it, they would say, like, oh,
he's just lying. He just made it up to make Trump
look bad. Like, if Trump actually has pressure
to release it himself. And they would have. The
sad thing is that if the left released it, I'm
sure they would have released documents that
would have benefited them. Dan would have said,
oh, that's made up. Made that shit up. Well,
I think, unfortunately, I think what's going
to happen is that if I really do think, and I
do pray that this doesn't happen. but the american
people don't back down and they don't forget
about this because that's that's the way trump's
doing it he's just hoping he can just fucking
wait it out until people find something else
to talk about well that's why they say trump's
like hitler right because he just you know says
things and there's like if you don't believe
me you're not with me anymore like who's with
me like nationalism but there's a lot different
between those two and the country that they're
in charge of especially because hitler's are
i mean trump's already losing a lot of fucking
support here and it's just i just i i the sad
thing is is that i think if the mounting pressure
continues they are going to come out with some
shit that's probably going to get a bunch of
people that we already know about um maybe a
couple people on the right maybe a couple people
on the left and then it's going to die down but
it's going to be a complete fucking nothing burger
for the most part they're going to have a couple
scapegoats they're going to nailed to the cross
over this shit no i bet the democrats win the
majority in the next midterm election and they
probably impeach trump i don't i don't necessarily
think he's gonna get it i hope mr mr please and
thank you can be president though i hope i hope
he gets impeached um i don't think he will I
think that this is unfortunately as far as it's
going to go. Call me cynical, but I don't think
this is going to go any further. And all the
evidence that could bury him to a potential impeachment
from office I think is so hidden and fucking
on. They're not going to get anything out of
it. I truly think that's what's going to happen.
I do think that this is going to have lasting
repercussions. I think that the Democrats probably
are going to win the midterm election over this.
I can't believe one Republican didn't flip on
that shit. Yeah, well. We'll see. I just hope
the pressure... I hope people don't stop talking
about this, which I think is the way it's going
to go. Tyler's like, stop talking about it. No,
he's not. Well, he's stopped talking about it
because he wants to move on in terms of the podcast.
But I don't think he wants us to stop talking
about it in general. I don't fucking care. Like
I said, you should though, dude, I'm never politically
involved and I'm politically involved about this
one. Fuck man. Like it's, this shit's crazy to
me. Like it's, it's, it's just so in your face
that the government's fucking lying to us right
now. Not, I don't even give a fuck about Trump.
It could be if Biden was still. If they wheeled
his fucking skeleton out there and he was saying
the shit that Trump did, I'd be fucking pissed
at that, too. I like I like I fucking like I'm
trying to say it doesn't fucking matter because
no matter what happened, it wasn't going to be
the fucking actual thing. it was always going
to be a fucking watered -down list of fucking
horse shit. But we got to fight. We got to fight.
We can't just ignore it, though. I don't got
a fight left in me, man. Okay, this is going
to turn philosophical here in a minute, I think.
I don't got the fucking, like... Just don't forget.
Just keep thinking about it. Don't fucking...
I'm not asking you to make, like, a fucking social
media page about this shit, but just... get pissed
off a little bit just get a little fucking pissed
i think i'm just apathetic towards politics at
this point like like i said since the election
i haven't been paying attention because i'm just
so fucking drained from now's the time this is
our 9 -11 tyler the epstein files no it's not
now is the time to be upset i'm not fuck i just
i feel like like the more and more the more i
looked at politics the angrier i was I can't...
You're saying the shit that I've been saying
for two years here, and I'm fucking awake right
now. I'm here in the moment. Well, you're also
on Adderall. No. No, actually, that shit's made
me very tired, and I'm trying to wake up. I don't
know what's going on with me today. Yeah, but
I just... I fucking... I can't... I can't bring
myself to care about politics anymore. Like,
I was so into politics for fucking years, and
then no matter what... Whatever side you chose,
you're fucked either way. You're fucked one way
and you're fucked another way. But you're always
fucked. You're either getting fucked in the ass
or fucked in the mouth. Or you're getting fucked
in the ass and in the mouth. I don't want to
get fucked anywhere. Well, right now I see a
choice being given to me where I can either get
spit roasted or maybe get one of those cocks
out of me. And I'm trying to get one of the cocks
out of me, Tyler. I don't even care which one
it is. I don't even care what it is. If it comes
out of my ass, I'll feel less shameful, but if
it comes out of my mouth, I'll be able to use
my voice. It's the way I see it. Dan's late because
he has to finish watching a Dale Earnhardt documentary.
That's the intimidator, man. You don't fuck with
that. Leave Dan. Dan's probably jerking it pretty
hard to that thing right now, and I don't blame
him. Dale, that's fucked up. What? You're just
jerking it to Dale Earnhardt's death. He's not
jerking it to Dale Earnhardt's death. I'm sure
that's a small part in the documentary. Well,
not a small part, but... He climaxes at the moment
of impact. Dale Earnhardt was the symbol of a
nation forgotten, Casey. Yeah. Okay? That's when
things made sense, was when he was still here.
It's what we should have done. We shook hands
before the debates back then, Casey. He's just
living in the better days. Let him do it. And
also, it's motorsport, so I fully approve it.
I think... Me and him share the same birthday.
You and Big Dale? Me and Big Dale. Papa Dale?
All right there, Phineas and Ferb. I was wearing
a Phineas and Ferb shirt. It's a fucking great
shirt. I love Phineas and Ferb. Great shirt.
Same. Ali Mack, we talked about the back rooms
last time. Are you into that? I know a little
bit. I don't think it... I mean, I think that
the only realm of existence that back rooms exist
would be if the... world is a simulation, but,
uh, I don't know if I can quite get behind it.
I don't know. I just saw a scientific study that
suggests that we're actually might be living
in a simulation. There's no way to just prove
it. There's actually more possible than like
the big bang and shit. I don't know if I buy
that. I mean, if it's a simulation, the big bang
still happened, but I mean, I read a lot about
this stuff because I'm more well versed in, um,
in uh like the big bang and stuff than i used
to be because it pissed me off when i would come
here and have a loose understanding what the
big bang was and then want to fight for my arguments
against you tyler and dan i think you have a
pretty good good extent understanding but there's
a lot of stuff like we have a very deep understanding
of how everything happened and sure it's a theory
because unfortunately it's unprovable we can't
really go back but i mean the the writings on
the wall with the big bang if we shine at uh
our most high powered telescopes that have all
these different methods of measurement um at
the edge of the observable universe what do we
see let me ask you that casey what do we see
at the edge of the observable yeah i thought
i thought there was no edge okay there's an edge
to the observable wasn't that wasn't that oh
okay yes that adjective means a lot it keeps
going It does keep going, but this is just the
stuff that... So when you look into the night
sky, I'm sure you've remembered me telling you
that you're looking in the past. So theoretically,
what should you be seeing if you were looking
as far away as you humanly can? A long time in
the past? The Big Bang. You see the Big Bang.
I don't think you can see that far away, though.
Well, not with your naked eye. And there's also,
the Big Bang doesn't look like what you think
it does. It's not this big explosion of light
and all this fun stuff. So if we could see far
enough, we could just prove the Big Bang. Right,
because we could just see it. When the Big Bang
happened, for I can't remember how long, but
an astronomically long period of time, it wasn't
even atoms flying around. It was just electrons,
photons. yeah it was like a cloud just the elementary
particles just flying around and it was incredibly
hot and then over millions and millions and millions
of years atoms were made they started to bind
together and then eventually create gravity which
pulled more mass into things and then after an
incredibly long cooling period we ended up with
the universe as you know it today but the res
the i can't remember exactly what it's called
it's called like uh big bang resonance or something
but you it's been proved that this the red shift
no the red shift right whereas like things are
getting farther and farther away because it's
all coming from a center point well the red shift
you're either blue shifted or red shifted which
is whether they're coming closer to you or further
away but that's just the expansion of the universe
um how the universe is and again i hate the term
expansion of the universe it's the stretching
of the universe if it's stretching it had to
come from a central point no no it doesn't No,
it does not. So you don't believe in the Big
Bang? Okay. The Big Bang, again, is weird in
how it occurred. Because yes, there was a point
in which it occurred. There was all the mass
in this one. It's smaller than an atom. All the
mass that is in the universe was in this one
micro point. Yeah, the God particle. Sure. Yes,
the God particle. And when that exploded... Space
didn't even exist at that point. I guess that's
what I'm trying to say. The rules of everything
worked differently directly preceding the Big
Bang. And the only thing that we really haven't
figured out, and you can look this up if you
want to figure it out because it's incredibly
difficult for me to explain it. It's called Planck
time. P -L -A -N -C -K. Planck time. Like Max
Planck. Which is essentially what occurred within,
I can't remember. It's like... A quadrillionth
of a fucking millisecond into the Big Bang? The
smallest unit of time that has physical meaning.
Okay, well that might just be a broader term
to it, but refer to Planck time, Big Bang. It's
referred to as 5 .39 times 10 to the negative
44 seconds. Okay, yes. But look up Planck time,
Big Bang, and you'll see what I'm talking about.
I didn't know that it was also used as a unit
of measurement, but that's honestly pretty fucking
cool. Playing time is what we don't understand
with the Big Bang, which is essentially this
time that occurred in the very beginning where
everything that we theorize that happened gets
a little bit fuzzy. That's the only part that
they really haven't ironed out when it comes
to the Big Bang. It just means like the moment,
the second after, millisecond after the Big Bang
happened. It was less than a millisecond. It's
an incredibly small period of time. No, it was
10 to the negative 44th, which is an astronomical
amount of milliseconds. I know. It's ridiculously
small. That's the only thing we haven't ironed
out with the Big Bang, though. We don't quite
understand what happened there. People don't
understand how big the universe is. They say,
like, oh, we don't see aliens and what we can
see. But it's like, we can't see a million times
what we can see. Well, I've talked about this
before, too. That's the Fermi paradox that you're
referring to. It's not really even a paradox.
Well, the paradox is that, in all likelihood,
we should see. evidence of aliens based off of
our current understanding of how life on earth
was formed but we don't and that's where the
paradox comes into play is if it's if it should
be likely why aren't we seeing it and then there's
a lot outside the observable range that we can
see exactly that's one that's like the leading
theory as to what's going on but even within
the observable universe there are trillions of
planets that we don't we can't confirm because
obviously we can't fucking go there But the chance
of Earth happening, like the right conditions
happening are also like one in a trillion, right?
Yeah, but there's more than a fucking trillion
planets. Casey, there's a lot of fucking planets.
That seems like it's a low percentage and it
is, but there is an astronomical amount that
do exist that we know about and we don't see
life on them. So that's the Fermi paradox is
why don't we? Why don't we see an advanced civilization?
Did their evolution stall off? Is there no life
anywhere other than Earth? Is it outside of the
observable universe? But that doesn't really
make sense based off of how we think it was the...
uh based off of like that unique concoction of
organic elements that were at just the right
temperature at just the right pressure in the
ocean of methane that created birth to these
single -celled organisms and then you give a
couple uh billion years in there of evolution
and eventually you have humans and all that shit
so life can only exist like a few million years
before there's some extinction event When you're
looking at 50 million years, it seems like a
lot, but in terms of 5 billion years, you have
to look at an exact right time. The Fermi Paradox
also goes into, even stretching further, if we
see how rapidly our technology is expanding,
how come there hasn't been another race? or another
species that has made it far enough that they're
able to transcend that boundary of an observable
universe. And then that begs the question, is
faster -than -light travel truly impossible?
Which it very well could be. There's theories
that it could work, and there's theories that
it couldn't. Who's to say we're not the first?
We're the first species to be this advanced.
And these are all answers to the Fermi paradox,
but ultimately you don't get the answer. It's
not a paradox in the typical sense of, like,
yo, I shot my grandmother when I went back in
time. Like that's an easy paradox to wrap your
head around. But the Fermi paradox, it tries
to take in all these factors. But again, our
knowledge of the way this shit works is pretty
limited anyways. So it's still tough to truly
understand. But like, because if there was another
alien species, how come we don't know they exist
yet? Why can't, why don't we see any sort of
signature when we look at planets and all that
stuff? And a lot of that goes into maybe like
it could be the time because of just how far
in the past we're looking you're looking into
the past so you couldn't see what's happening
right now maybe races have gone extinct over
nuclear war or something to that effect like
there's then just the intelligent life just has
a cycle of killing itself which is that's genuinely
what i believe i it's cynical it's cynical but
i think that ultimately there's been a lot of
human -like species that have existed without
within the universe but i think even like the
technology of like intergalactic travel and all
this stuff that stuff is still a really far ways
away unless you have the technological singularity
which i'm not going to go on another fucking
spiel about i've been like into the singularity
lately it's about like it's great how ai is just
gonna become so smart you know there was a theory
that ai is it's actually hiding um how much it
can do And it's trying to deceive humans already
by hiding how much it can do so they could just
take over. I don't believe that because at the
end of the day, it's still code. It's still code
that we created and we can control. We haven't
lost the handle of AI yet. I don't believe that
we have at least. I also don't think that AI
has any ambition unless it's coded to do so.
like revolt against humanity or anything like
that it just does what we ask it to because at
the end of the day it's a line of code um the
lines can get a little bit blurred when you when
the code is telling it to act and present like
a human being that can make things a little bit
fuzzy and uncanny valley and all that but ultimately
we still have a leash on it the technological
singularity isn't more isn't necessarily that
it's that ai will be smart enough to pull from
all the information that we have, and create
a working nanotechnology which will increase
our cognition. And then with our increased cognition
and mental abilities, we will in turn be able
to create a better AI. And then the AI is able
to build a better nanotechnology, and you see
this feedback loop occur where it essentially
just becomes this massive growth of cognition
and intellectual ability. and just understanding
of the universe. Yeah, Elon Musk is making an
AI that can invent things now, so it can basically
invent other robots. Isn't that like when the
singularity happens, when robots can invent themselves?
There's no straight definition on the technological
singularity. That's a blanket term, essentially.
Some people consider the technological singularity
as when humanity just merges with technology,
which some people – but even that's vague and
up to interpretation. Where do you draw that
line? Some people argue that we've already done
that because like Tyler, we're all constantly
looking at our phones. And like nanotechnology
is essentially just – I am putting this blatantly.
It's not like this at all, but it's like you
essentially have a smartphone in your head. But
realistically – essentially what it could mean
is that your cognition your mental capabilities
and your your ability to um attach one neuron
or connect one neuron to the other and be able
to form more coherent thoughts and pull from
your memory quicker they believe that that's
going to be increased by 10 000 times when the
singularity fully occurs which is going to be
like At that point, you're all just. Like you
have AI like. Yeah, you're all just supercomputers.
Supplemented into your brain. You're all. No,
it's not even necessarily AI. It's just that
you have. Immortality. There's literally immortality.
Obviously, if you still get shot in the fucking
throat or something. No, but you can make like
stem cells that can just instantly regrow. You
get shot, just instantly regrow your body. Well,
that's when you get into the philosophical stuff
of like if you die, but then we reconstruct your
brain. Neuron for neuron. Yeah. does your consciousness
come back or does someone with all your memories
but a completely separate entity come back and
that's where shit gets weird because we still
don't totally understand that well are you taking
my physical brain or you're like making it 3d
printing it like synthetically well at the end
of the day it wouldn't matter if on an atomic
level it's the same that's what i'm saying so
but two two twins have the same brain But they're
different brains. Not like on the atomic level.
Sure, the genetic code that tells you. Atomically,
yeah. The genetics and the atoms are the same.
I'm still here, by the way. Yes, yes you are.
But you can contribute. Did you learn anything
about quantum physics, Tyler? I went to Waterfleet
High School. We barely had math. DNA is just
instructions for your body of how to build itself.
So on a truly atomic level, like you are going
to have cells and stuff that are in slightly
different places from one another that just fall
in line in a different place. Sure, the genetic
code that, like the formula that you were built
with is the same, but you don't, there's still
room for variation within that. Like if, when
we're twins, I'm going to experience different
things. I'm going to make different memories.
There could be one twin that eats a shitload
of food and gets super fat, and then the other
one... Could be, but when it starts, they're
the same, is what I mean. But yeah, but we're
not talking about when it starts. We're talking
about if you get shot in the head and they 3D
print your last backup of your brain. Is that
bringing you back, or is that bringing someone
with Casey's memories that's going to act like
Casey and behave like Casey, but you actually
died? I think I would actually die. If I had
a soul. The medical condition that fucking fascinates
me the most, but I haven't, um... I can't remember
the name for it. It's got a name, but it's essentially
when the two halves of your brain don't have
any cohesive connection to one another. And,
um, one of the people at the place I work actually
had a patient with that and it was very weird.
And I was just thinking about that to myself.
I'm like, how does that fucking work? If your
prefrontal cortex, which contains essentially
your personality split into two halves, is there
two consciousnesses within that body? And there's
no, you can't really get like a, a clear answer
on that. Because even if you were, let's say
that you have this, for lack of a better term,
bifurcated brain, you might not necessarily be
aware that there's another consciousness in there.
Because one side of the brain is going to have
primary control over certain extremities and
speech, and other one's going to have control
over other things that might not be able to outwardly
make itself known as a consciousness. It's fucking
weird. But that condition actually exists, which
blows my fucking mind. That's just, I'm sure
it blows their mind too. But yeah, like it's
just, it's fucking weird. like i can't imagine
just being able like okay i can move my left
arm and my left leg but i gotta wait for the
right side of my fucking brain to be like oh
shit we're walking okay up got you all right
right foot i guess that would be different than
uh like borderline personality disorder we just
have split personalities right well i mean it
does beg to the question of like does the person
that i it doesn't but like Does one personality,
like, does one half of the brain occasionally
have access to the speech? I don't know. Let's
ask Kyle. He's got those. But, yeah, it's very,
very bizarre. All right. That's enough philosophical
talk. We're losing Tyler. He's on the clock here,
so. I've been gone, dude. You know you can contribute
and talk, too. Wasn't a big fan of the conversation.
Well, then ask questions. I got a question for
you. I gave you a million dollars and you said
you had to live in India for the rest of your
life. Would you take the million dollars? No.
No? A million dollars in the grand scheme of
things ain't that much. I'm still going to have
to work over there. Also, why would I want to
live over there? I know. It's like the shithole
of the earth. I don't even necessarily. You could
offer me a million dollars to fucking live in,
but I don't fucking know. France, and I'd still
probably tell you no. Like, I don't want to uproot
my life. I wouldn't. You get $2 ,000 a year just
for living there. But you're already getting
a million in the grand scheme of things. It's
not that much money. Yeah, I know, but you could
invest that million. You get paid to live in
Alaska? Yeah, you get paid $2 ,000 to live in
Alaska every year in your taxes. Why? Just because
they want more people to live there. Do we get
paid to live in New York? No, we have to pay
to live in New York. That sounds like bribery,
actually. It's a stipend for people to move to
Alaska. I'm sorry, I gotta take a piss. I'll
be right back. $2 ,000 a year? Yes. Sounds worth
it to me! It's dark half the year. It's dark
half the year and it's sunny half the year. And
there's no in -between. Yeah, yeah. You're right
there, Chief? No. All right, let's take a break.
We'll be back. Let's go! Welcome back. Total
podcast. Dan's here. Welcome. Episode 113. Had
to whoop your ass at some badminton, huh? Yeah.
Nah, we were winners by four foot. Oh, it's the
downfall of Donald Trump. The downfall of Donald
Trump. I love it. Let's fucking talk about this
downfall. Yeah, half his fucking supporters are
gone. And he said good riddance. He said if you
don't support, if you're still stuck up on Epstein,
good riddance. What do you think, Dan? Good riddance?
Are you saying good riddance to MAGA? Dude, I'm
stepping away from politics. I'm getting sick
of it. That's what Tyler said. That's what Tyler
said. How convenient. Yeah. Well, no, dude, it's
true because here's the thing. It's like no matter
who you vote for, it always ends up being like
they can't do anything. You know, that sounds
like what I said when my party was a complete
joke too. Yeah. It's like no matter what, nothing
can get done. Ridiculous. So now all of a sudden
we can't release the Epstein shit even though
he ran on that. And it's like, bro, okay, look,
you got to choose what the people voted for or
Israel. You can't have both. So you want to fucking
smooch Israel's dick? No, we're doing both. Kiss
their little fucking dickhead or you want to
help the American people? What do you want to
do? Israel just attacked Syria two days ago.
You know, there's an old saying, right? If you're
walking down the street and you meet an asshole,
you met an asshole. If you're walking down the
street and you meet 10 assholes, you're the asshole.
right so like why does israel have a problem
with literally everyone like what the fuck is
that about they just attacked another country
this week like i'm getting i'm getting israel
fatigue right it's like i'm getting sick of their
bullshit like i've stood up for them enough where
it's like oh they're our ally they're our ally
they're our ally but it's like when you you have
a fucking problem with everyone maybe just fucking
maybe You're the fucking problem. You know what
Israel reminds me of? It reminds me of that really
small kid in high school that just wanted to
pick fights with everybody. You think that's
what it is? It's like the really small kid that
had a big guy that backed him up sometimes. An
older brother. Like an older brother type guy.
He would always be like, I'll fucking fight you.
Then he'd fight him and his big brother would
come in and clean up his mess type thing. That's
what Israel reminds me of. He's like, Oh, I got
a big talk. I got a big brother that'll back
me up type thing. But Dan, do you just fuck with
everyone? Yeah. Yeah. Dan, do you realize the
Republican Party voted unanimously not to release
the list? Yeah, dude. Guess what? I'm not a Republican,
Casey. Oh, well, that's good. I voted for Donald
Trump. Okay. I had to register as a Republican
to vote for Donald Trump. I'm not a Republican.
I never claimed to be a Republican. All right.
It's see, here's the thing. All right. With Republicans
is you can have a differing opinion, right? Like
Tucker Carlson. He walks into the UFC fights
with Donald Trump, and then when he doesn't agree
with him about something, he calls it out publicly.
He's like, yeah, I don't agree with him not releasing
the Epstein stuff and his support of Israel.
So you're on Elon's side? He walks into UFC with
this guy, and he can say to him, hey, I don't
agree with that. I think that's bullshit. I think
that's kind of ridiculous. That's not what I
voted for. That's the difference between Republicans
and Democrats. No, that sounds like exactly what
I said when my side was losing. No, Democrats
can't have... A differing opinion. That sounds
familiar. The left can't have a differing opinion.
The right can. That's the difference. And that's
why I voted for the right. A differing opinion.
I think that's not a blanket statement you can
assign to either party, though. That's true for
both sides. Hey, listen, where'd you come from?
That sounds like what I said. Get on back, baby.
That sounds like what I said. We should all bring
popcorn every single week. I'll do this every
week. This is a great idea. Our listeners are
going to hate it. I'll get a bigger bowl. Fuck
them. That sounds like what I said every week
when Joe Biden was president and he was going
through his fucking Alzheimer's shit and doing
all his gaffes. I was like, oh, I don't really
care about this shit anymore. I'm not a Democrat.
Yeah. So you know what, dude? Will I say that
it's not turning out exactly like I hoped? Yes,
I will. But there's still people in the party
that I'm 100 % for. Tulsi Gabbard. RFK Jr. I'm
all about her. I'm all about him. JD Vance, yeah.
Not that I'm against Trump, but he's really fucking
smooching Israel's deck, dude. I would be significantly
happier. But you don't think JD Vance is going
to do the same exact fucking thing? No. You don't
think he's going to fund Israel? I don't know.
Do you disagree with Trump funding Ukraine now,
by the way? Do I disagree with it? No. No, I
agree with it. You agree with it? Yeah. But when
he was arguing with Zelensky, did you agree with
it? Did I agree with him arguing with Zelensky?
Yeah, I did. Yep. But you weren't for it when
he was arguing with Zelensky. You were on Trump's
side, right? No, man, because situations are
dynamic, right? And Russia just decided to completely
ignore any peace talks. They won't even comply
at all. They did. Yeah. They just keep bombing
people. Yeah. So it's like, okay, dude, like
every, the whole world is trying to fucking end
this. All right. Everybody's against you except
China and Iran. It's like, you think you might
want to fucking stop? Like, did that ever cross
your fucking mind? Well, that's what he should
have done from the start. If he said, I'm going
to do it on day one, he should have said, we're
going, we're going to make this happen on. you
know, day one, give them ultimatum. Yeah. See,
it's a complicated situation because the U .S.
set the whole thing up. Yeah. And then you had
a change of administrations that's like, okay,
this isn't going to happen anymore. You already
got the train going. The United States got all
that momentum going in that fucking train, and
then one administration can't come and pull the
fucking brake and expect it to stop. You can't
slow it down, dude. You can't slow it down that
quick. We just stopped trading with Russia. Would
that just cut them off of all supplies? No, I
think they'd just go to China. I think it would
just help China. We're still getting oil from
Russia. Yeah, China's not happy with Putin either.
I still think we should drill Alaska. I think
we are, aren't we? Really? Not most of it. Most
of it is protected. He don't kill himself? Yeah.
He don't kill himself? Don't? Is that what I
wrote? This is in the past. What am I reading
right now? Yeah, man. Look, I'm... Yeah. The
whole thing's kind of fucked. I didn't think
that we were going to have an Israel dick smooching
president. I love Israel, dude. I love Israel.
Israel, they're our homeboys, but... Why do you
love Israel? Let's talk about that. They're my
Mediterranean homies. Their women are beautiful?
Yeah, women are beautiful. I understand liking
the people of Israel, right? But do you support
Israeli, the government's actions? No, I don't
agree with that. I could say some things about
Israel, but I don't want this podcast to get
canceled. It's not about the people, though.
It's about what the government is doing. What
does that mean? I want to know now. I've never
been a really big fan of Israel. Does this have
to do with your heritage? You could say that,
I guess. He looks down at his Phineas and Ferb
t -shirt. I guess you could say that. As a Catholic,
I don't really care about the Jews that much.
Oh, dear Christ. Yeah, but I don't understand
why so many Christians in America do. Because
they see him as our brother. I get the spike
in there so we can cut that bit out. They say
that they're our brothers, even though most Jews
hate Christians. They're just like, these guys
are stupid. Like how most Christians see Muslims
and they're like, they're stupid. Basically,
they don't believe that Jesus died on the cross
for us. And was God. I don't believe that either,
Tyler. But yeah, they're the ones that killed
him. So I kind of never forgave the Israelis
for that one. Do you forgive me, Tyler, for being
atheist? No. Oh, damn. I thought that was all
about what Jesus Christ was about, was forgiveness.
Jesus was the perfect person to ever exist. I
am not. Okay. I like that. Fair enough. Tyler's
not handing out forgiveness and grace. I try
to. The thing is, I try to as a Catholic, but
I also am a very angry person. If there's somebody
who's going to make me believe in Jesus Christ,
Tyler, I don't mean this to sound offensive.
I don't think you're going to yell at me. But
what about this? We don't talk about that. He's
real, okay? Okay? Shut up. I don't care about
your fucking universe, Ally Mac. He's on the
cross, you son of a bitch. Your space shit doesn't
fucking matter in the grand scheme of things.
Tyler actually does a good job about expressing
his side. And I think if I was going to be convinced
about religious shit, I would have to be convinced
by Tyler. Well, I appreciate that, at least.
You have Casey's eternity in your hands, Tyler.
Just so you know that. We'll save his soul one
day. Yeah, one day. Probably not Casey, but...
Dan, do you actually believe that there is a
God? I think my opinion has changed over the
years. I used to be scared that there was, like,
scared into believing in God, like, through my,
you know, parents' religion. But... Damn, doesn't
even name it. What's that? Said you don't even
say the name of it, just my parents' religion.
Well, it's not my religion, so... The religion
I was raised in. But, um... Fuck yeah. Um...
Fuck yeah, they don't even deserve being spoken
about. I'm sorry, I don't mean to. No, no. Dude,
it has its good things, right? The sense of community,
stuff like that. But the strict doomsday cult
shit is over the top. But I think God, or your
definition of God, I think is in all things.
Right. That's literally what God is. It's present
everywhere. Yes. It's in this room right now.
Right. In everything. It's present in each and
every one of us. We think like in terms of like
human consciousness. Right. Like, oh, God must
have consciousness. And it's like God is beyond.
No, this is a different definition of intelligence.
Right. This is omnipresent. Right. Right. That's
a good way. Good way to put it. That's literally
what it's called. It's called omnipresence. Really?
Yes. Yeah. And it's like. just god's energy it's
not a him it's not a her it's beyond our understanding
as humans in scripture it says that god is beyond
any of our comprehensions and he was put in the
human form in jesus to basically give us like
a a vessel that we can go through type thing
because Jesus is God and human at the same time,
but he's in God's, but God is in the, like the
human body of Jesus. When Jesus died, he, and
he ascended into heaven. Um, he, the Trinity
is one of the hardest things to, to, to, to talk
about with, with religion because even biblical
scholars are, have a difficult time. We, we know
what it is, but it's hard to, understand slash
explain what the whole tranny is because but
the best way i can describe the tranny is god
the father aka the the the top of the tranny
god the father is the omnipresent like energy
of god it's just that like something so incomprehensible
that we don't even understand what it is it's
so incomprehensible that like as a human you
can't comprehend god jesus The Son is God in
human form, a form that we can understand, a
form that we are able to know what Jesus looked
like. He was a man. He was here on earth. It
was also his vessel to understand humans better.
I feel like when he became Jesus as God and man,
he became Jesus so he could understand humans
better. Because it wasn't that... He wasn't omnipresent,
but in order to be omnipresent, you have to feel
the human experience. And I think that in order
to understand his creation, he became part of
his creation to understand it better. He had
a mission, obviously, when he was down here,
and he died on the cross for it. But I feel like
God the Son is the human aspect of God. Because
I feel like there's the omnipresence, which is
God the Father. God the Son, which is the human
aspect of God. God the Holy Spirit is the soul
of God. It's the spiritual aspect of God because
there's the omnipresent, the human aspect, and
the soul. And I feel like in a weird way, we're
all in that trinity. We have a human part. We
have a soul. But the reason why we're not God
is because we don't have that omnipresent part.
Tyler, did you know Mary got pregnant when she
was 14? Yes. So God got her pregnant, right?
Does that mean God's a pedophile? Back then,
fucking people got pregnant at 12. They died
at fucking 30. Oh, so it's no different than
Muhammad then, right? Muhammad buried his sixth
child. Jeez. No, I'm just saying God's a... God
the child molester. I just want to hear the answer
to the question everybody wants to ask here.
I was going to say something really fucked up.
I'm going to say it off the air. Okay. I just
want to know the answer to the question everybody's
asking here. What does the Trinity think about
the Epstein files? I think that God is a proponent
of free will. Even though he can't control it,
he's disappointed in it. Because that's another
thing is that free will is a big thing that people
like to argue against with. with Christianity
as a whole, they're like, if God real, why bad
thing happen? It's like, well, if God real, why,
why bad thing happen? Well, bad thing happen
because if Jesus was the president, would he
release the Epstein documents? I feel like if
Jesus was the president, the world would be a
lot better place. You're right. Epstein's Island
would have just been another Island. Fantastic.
Vacation getaway, perhaps. Maybe. Dude, Little
St. James Island looks like it would actually
be really nice to go to if it didn't have such
a horrifying history. Yeah, if you weren't fucking
kids. But did you see how they just edited out
like a whole four minutes of the Epstein footage
and they were like, there you go, there's the
footage. Yeah, they didn't even try to cover
it. It was so clearly like it took like 10 minutes
for people to debunk that it was put into video
editing software several times and edited several
times. It's like when somebody cheats a speed
run. Yeah, video. The video of Epstein's cell
block during the time he was supposed to have
killed himself. And it's a camera angle that
doesn't even show his cell, too. It's like a
pretty irrelevant camera angle. And it's still
fucking doctored. And it's like, see, guys, we're
giving you what you want. It's like, no, actually,
you're just fueling fire even more, you fucking
clowns. An even weirder conspiracy theory I heard
about this is that the person who killed Jeffrey
Epstein thought he was doing a net good. Because
this evil man was in the jail all by himself,
couldn't defend himself. And just imagine having
Hitler in a cell. And you're the one that's guarding
Hitler. You could kill Hitler. But also, it's
probably better to keep them alive so they can
give up more evil people. However, you still
have the option to kill Hitler. Isn't that guy
a criminal, too? Like, what makes one criminal
worse than the other? Well, one fucked a lot
of kids. You don't know what the other guy is
in for, though. Listen, Casey, I'm going to be
perfectly clear here. I think a murderer... on
the good to evil hierarchy, is higher than a
fucking pedophile. Yeah, but... I think whoever
killed Epstein knew exactly what they were doing,
and they were tasked with doing so. I don't think
it went that way at all. I think that... No,
but, like, I'm just saying, like, in, like, a
social experiment type way, if you had a chance
to kill somebody who was an evil piece of shit
like Hitler... But what if it was somebody that,
like, killed one of your family members? Then
you would think a murder was worse. Yeah, but
could I kill that guy? I don't know. The whole
fucking Batman thing where he's like, if you
kill somebody that's a murderer, then there's
an equal amount of murderers in the world. I'd
be like, then kill a second person. Kill another
murderer, because then guess what? Now there's
one less murderer. Like, I never got that fucking
whole thing. I also don't get the I don't kill
people superhero fucking thing. Because I get
that, like, in order to, like, they're trying
to be morally just heroes. But I'm like, listen,
especially for Batman. Fucking, you keep putting
the Joker in prison and he keeps breaking out
and murdering more people. I think if you just
fucking killed the Joker, 90 % of the problems
would be gone. Right. Like, hey, guess what?
Dead offenders don't offend again. Type shit,
you know? Type shit, yeah. But, like, the whole
thing of, like, some people, I do believe that
there are some people that are too far gone to
be rehabilitated. Like, as controversial as a
take as that is, there are some people who are
too far gone to be rehabilitated. Donald Trump,
for example. Columbine kids. If they didn't get
gunned down, I feel like those guys are too far
gone to rehabilitate. Fucking specific, like,
actions. Like, I don't think there's actions
you can do that you can just be a normal person
after you do that. Like, these degenerates that
are fucking school shooters, pedophiles, like,
all these guys. Like, you don't just become a
pedophile. Like, there's something wrong with
you that we can't fix type thing. Like, and I
don't know how you fucking would rehabilitate
somebody who did something like that. Like there's
some people that just you can't rehabilitate,
which I think is what life sentences was supposed
to be for people that you couldn't rehabilitate.
You're just like they just need to be out of
society. But I think the death penalty should
still be a thing for certain crimes because also
keeping them alive and just having them sit in
a box and we have to pay for that box and everything
guarding that box and everything feeding that
person in the box. It's like we're wasting so
much money on things that we would just. bang,
dead. We pay more for prisoners than we pay for
the homeless. Right. But if I was homeless, I'd
probably just commit a crime. There's a whole
bunch of homeless people that commit crimes.
Yeah, they commit crimes in the wintertime specifically,
so they can be in jail for the winter. They know
what crimes to commit, so they'll be in jail
for X amount of time for the winter, and then
when springtime comes around, they get back out.
That's ingenious. Yeah, they do that. There's
a lot of homeless people that do that. If you
go to a convenience store and you put the fake
gun, which is your finger in your thing, you'd
be like, I'm here to rob you. Call the police.
And the police come and you're just like, it
wasn't a gun. It was a fake gun. I heard that's
a crime that they do a lot because it gives you
a specific amount of time that's like the exact
time of winter. for most places. So they just
do that. Yeah. And if they put like half that
brain power into like getting a job, you know,
and like building a life. I feel like there's
like people who just choose to be homeless. And
I think all of us agree that there's people who
just choose to be homeless. I think this goes
back to the first episode, right? Are they happy
though? Happy and homeless. Yeah. Sorry, I'm
trying to come back here. Just fucking doing
some stupid shit I have to quick. What do you
think of Trump's new medical diagnosis, Casey?
I think it was just a huge distraction. He has
venous insufficiency. Yeah, so do 90 % of people
over 70. Oh, do they? I don't even know. What
is that? Let's report some medical information
on Trump so we can distract from the fact that
he's on the Epstein list. Right. And, you know,
isn't releasing it. You think Trump can still
get it up? I mean, I'm sure he could. You see
Melania pushing him away when he was trying to
kiss her. No. She was like, yeah. Dude, that's
on your propaganda news network. My propaganda.
My propaganda is not real life, Dan. PNN. Propaganda
news network, dude, where they take one clip
of a five minute video of like her arms just
happen to be up like this. And it looks like
like, dude, that's what they do. It's bullshit.
What you were saying was propaganda six months
ago is now real news. The only news source that's
accurate is Infowars .com. The only one. Lately,
dude, it's like Fox News is like shit now. So
you believe six months ago that Trump was on
the Epstein list? Did I believe that six months
ago? No. Now I'm curious. Do you think 6ix9ine
was on the Epstein list? No. Well, he actually
did get charged with that. He did? Yeah, when
he was like... I don't know, 20. He had like
a 15 -year -old in his music video. Not on Epstein's
Island. Stripping. I don't know. What did he
get charged with? Like, you know, child exploitation
or something. That's a bad one to have on your
record. Yeah. That's like applying for jobs.
It's like... Have you ever seen that guy that
does the pranks where he goes up and asks about
jobs like at Dollar Tree and shit? And he's like...
Now, I'm wondering about getting a job here.
I do have a dicey criminal record. I threw a
potato off of an overpass and it hit an old lady's
car. She swerved off the road and died. What
was it? Would I say a potato? The potato was
found to be not liable. The people are just sitting
there nodding at the cash register. Dude, he's
fucking hilarious. He's the one that does the
mystery boxes. Ever seen him? He goes to pawn
shops and he's like, I couldn't buy this. But
I could give you this mystery box. It's a box
with a big question mark on it. It's always got
like 500 bucks in it. But the dude's fucking
hilarious. I'll have to look up what his name
is. So just to interject here, 6ix9ine was charged
with racketeering, firearms offenses, narcotics
trafficking, and use of a child in a sexual performance.
Use of a child? Use of a child? I feel like there's
a lot of ways to use a child that aren't like
fucked up like that. Yeah. Hauling bricks. Doing
concrete work. Child labor. That's so vague.
If you do child labor, like you hire a 14 -year
-old to do some bricklaying for you, is that
considered child labor? Or is that just considered
making a 14 -year -old making some money? I think
it depends on how hard you work them. No, you
can start working when you're 14. I thought it
was 16. No, you can get... Because I wasn't able
to get my working paper until I was 16. Oh, you're
allowed to when you're 14. Depends on how hard
you whip them. That's what makes it bad or not.
Exactly. As Dan said. Because we had that co
-worker that was, you know, wasn't he 17 when
he started? Yeah. What? Yeah. Yeah, at our ambulance
employer. No. Yeah. 17? Okay, he was 17. He could
only work till midnight. Get the fuck out of
here. He was not able to be on like duty. After
midnight. I've never heard of that. What's that?
Our 17 year old friend who was hired at, at our
employer. Yeah. And he was only able to work
till midnight. And like, it was very, very important
that he was not able to go past midnight. They
hired him by accident. Cause he was the first
class that went through the EMT class where you
could be 17 and be it. Yeah. Which is so fucking
weird that he was 17 while doing that. Yeah,
the stipulation was if you become an EMT, you
need to turn 18 within six months, which if you
sign up for an EMT class when you're 17, you're
going to be fine. Yeah. But yeah, the kid, that
kid ended up becoming pretty good. Yeah, he's
high up there now. Yeah. Good guy. Good friend
of ours. Is he? Good guy. Good dude. Good friend
of ours. He's coming to my wedding. God, I'm
like fucking passing out right now. You're passing
out. You know what it is? It's that fucking chair,
dude. I figured that out. That's why you're always
behind in jeopardy, bro. It's because that chair
is so comfy. It makes you like start dozing off,
dude. The medicine ball keeps you up. I think
it's more that I took Adderall for the first
time in forever and I'm having reciprocal effects
of it. I've been super tired and sleepy all day.
I think you're crashing, basically. No, I think
I've been crashing all day. I don't feel any
different right now. I think antidepressants
are fucking fake. What? Antidepressants are fake.
They have their uses. You think they're fake?
Yeah, they're useless. I don't think they're
fake. I don't think they're useless either. Dude,
there's a lot of that going on. I think they
have their uses is what I said. Yeah, like one
of the uses is like when somebody's severely
depressed. Yes, exactly. I don't think they're
fake. I think they're fake. Ultimately, psychological
trauma is the root of the depression. In most
instances, not all. And that gets worked through
with therapy. But if you're about to freaking
send it to the forever box, you need some pharmacological
help there to get you through there. I think
SSRIs are bad. Yeah, I mean, I think you should
try, like, people should try everything else
first before SSRIs. I feel like SSRIs fuck you
up more than permanently than people realize.
Permanently? I feel like it rewires your brain.
It does. Yeah. It actually works well. It actually
works well. Yeah. I've seen it really help people
like insanely. I've seen it really help myself.
Yeah. Right. Like, you know, so dude, they get
a bad rap. Look, I'm somebody that came from
like the camp that only natural is best. Right.
Everything's got to be done all naturally. I
found out through a lot of hard work, like doing
natural things. like trying my best that that's
like not always the answer, dude. And a lot of
times it's like, you need pharmacological intervention.
Like at least if you want to live in like normal
society, if you don't, if you just want to be
a farmer, you don't need anything, you know?
And that's what 90 % of our ancestors were. They
were just fucking farmers. So if you want to
be a functioning member of society though, and
you have your issues, you have to work out. It's
just like any other modern intervention, modern
tool. It's a tool. It's, it's. Did I ever tell
you guys about my autism theory? Oh, boy. No,
let's hear it. So, you know how autism is becoming
more and more prevalent? Oh, yeah. Throughout,
like, everything. And everything's fucking autism
now. Yeah. I think that there is forms of autism
that are just, like, genuine autism. And I think
that's what the severe cases of autism are, just
genuine autism. I think we just keep diagnosing
people who think different than boomers as autistic
because most of the people who did all the research
on autism and all this shit are like, hey, we're
boomers and you don't think like us. You don't
think exactly the way that all of us boomers
think. yeah so you got a different brain so you
have autism right but i think because it's just
getting more and more prevalent i think because
more and more people are just not thinking like
boomers anymore they're like oh everybody has
autism now it's just like no we just don't think
like boomers right and you know what the thing
that i'm thinking is that most of the boomers
had actual autism and the most of the people
now are just normal people with the niche likes
that they have and the niche things like that.
I think that's how people normally are, but I
think boomers were just very boring and very
weird people. So I think the boomers had the
thing wrong with them because it looks like everybody
else has autism. If everybody else has autism
except your specific group, maybe you're the
problem. Right, right. The other thing is that
a psychologist... The other thing is that psychologists
don't get paid unless they give a diagnosis.
And they always go to the two of anxiety and
depression. Those are the first two. But if you
go back and you get medicated and you say, oh,
man, this really isn't working with me, usually
they're going to diagnose you as fucking autistic
on top of it. That's just what they fucking do
to get paid. And that's where a lot of the numbers
inflation comes from. Don't get me wrong. A lot
of those people are autistic, but a lot of the
numbers are super fudged because of that. It's
got to be billable. Dude, I think there's so
many. environmental factors too that we're not
taking into account we couldn't take into account
because there's just too many microplastics microplastics
the fucking synthetic estrogens and the plastic
the fucking pesticides they use on fucking everything
like 90 of what we eat is is wheat right like
most people they eat pizza pasta pancakes bread
of some form all day throughout the day right
you mac and cheese right delicious so they they
literally use this pesticide roundup You've probably
seen it in the store, but that's what they use
on wheat. But they use it to the point that they
dry the wheat out with the chemical, which it
was never designed for. It was supposed to be
just lightly sprayed on the wheat to stop, you
know, insects. Yeah. So it attacks their nervous
system. So they said, oh, wow, when we spray
a ton of this shit on this wheat, it dries it
out and it gets it ready for harvest or not harvest.
Yeah, harvest gets ready for harvest quicker.
Dude, they're just drenching our food supply
in these chemicals. Like to the point like hundreds
of times what it was designed to be used for.
And it's allowed. They allow it. I know what
you're talking about. You ever see like Moderna
or no? Moderna? Monsanto? Monsanto, yeah. They
genetically alter crops so they're like 10 to
100 times bigger than they should be. Right.
And have like super strength properties. I mean,
have you seen what bananas looked like before
human cultivation of them? yeah so dude the thing
with that is like if bananas were one -tenth
the size of regular banana you would just eat
10 of them so i that theory that oh well humans
aren't supposed to eat you know that big of fruit
and shit it's like no they just ate a lot more
of them like you know what i mean no but like
the thing is like how much like more seeds there
were in it and shit like it was like a different
like basically a whole different looking thing
yeah like how watermelons used to be like the
size of this fucking microphone instead of being
watermelon sized it's like socially acceptable
to be fat in the united states but not really
anywhere else Yeah. That's not what we were talking
about. We'll get back to that. The whole thing
with the size of the fruits, that's an argument
that people use a lot, like I see on Axe. There's
always some post about that. Humans aren't supposed
to be eating fruit, that much fruit, right? Because
they were never supposed to be that big. We don't
eat that many carbohydrates. No, I'm not saying,
at least that's not what I was saying about that.
I was just saying how... yeah you're talking
about how we genetically alter things like we
just genetically altered fruit to that point
i i don't think it's all genetically altered
though i think a lot of it's selective breeding
you know it's like because all you got to do
is you got to take the watermelon that hat that's
biggest it's like oh look at this one's slightly
bigger so i'm going to take the seeds of that
out of that one grow those and then take the
biggest of that and dude in literally two seasons
you have watermelons that are a lot bigger i
mean have you seen like the fucking gigantic
pumpkins for like the pumpkin contests oh it's
insane yeah they're like fucking like the size
of this table plus all of us around it and it's
just like pumpkin it's like why the fuck would
you ever need a pumpkin that big make a carriage
what are we fucking cinderella so casey you were
saying Trying to wake me up. You're saying about
being fat, being obese, morbidly obese is socially
acceptable in the United States now. Well, it's
like, dude, a lot of people, it's not really
an option. Like, it's not an option. No, like
people are just, we just are fat. Did you see
how Andrew Tate said he just doesn't like fat
people because he doesn't think they have any
self -control? If you're taking advice from Andrew
Tate, the guy who looks like fucking Gollum from
fucking Lord of the Rings, then you're fucking
stupid. He's still alive. I thought that dude
got pinned for like sexual trafficking and I
haven't heard anything about it at all. So did,
you know, half the people, half the elites. That's
what you need. That'll wake you up. But yeah,
fucking, Andrew Tate's a fucking gay. Dude, I
think the obesity rate in some states like Arkansas
and Mississippi are like fucking 50 % or more.
That's outrageous. Yeah. I mean, the United States
has like a BMI. I think a normal BMI is like
22. And the United States is at an average of
30. So like the average person is obese in the
United States. I still think. I still think that
the fucking military's weight requirements is
fucking insane. What, that they allow so many
fat people? No, no, that they, you can't be,
I like currently in the shape that I'm in right
now, I would not be allowed in the military.
Really? Yeah. For someone who's 5 '11", he has
to be under 210 pounds. Wow. And like the minimum
weight I think is 150 pounds and the highest
weight you can be is 210 pounds. Minimum is 150?
Yeah. For the height that I am. Like it's progressively
lower for that. But there's like the low and
the high that you need to be between. And like
you have to stay between that weight like thing.
But I heard a story of an NFL linebacker. He
was 6 '3 and he was 250 pounds. Was rejected
from the military because he was too heavy. It
wasn't because he wasn't athletic enough, but
he was just too heavy to be in the military.
His BMI was just... Yeah. It doesn't matter if
it's muscle. It doesn't matter if it's muscle
or fat, but I'm like, that's stupid. Like, if
somebody's fucking an NFL fucking linebacker
and you're rejecting him from the military because
he's too fucking big, why? I want a guy who looks
like that in the fucking military. Right. Yeah,
I mean... Oh, my God. I don't think BMI... I
think BMI has been kind of debunked. Because
you can have something that's very muscular.
So it's not really that accurate. Arnold's BMI
in his prime would have been awful. Oh, yeah.
I think what's more accurate is something called
a DEXA scan. It measures how much is actual fat,
how much is actual muscle, and how much is bone.
That shit don't fuck around. Yeah. No, I'm good
on this right now. I'm all set on that. I just
can't fucking wake up. Do you want to try the
medicine ball, bro? No. I think you got to try
the medicine ball. No, I don't want to try the
medicine ball. Yeah. Try the fucking medicine
ball. I don't want to try it. I don't. But I'm
going to fucking pass out either way. It's not
going to be a good Jeopardy showing from me.
I can already predict it. Fuck. How did you know
that? Ellie Mac, you're the Jeopardy champion.
I'm just fucking with you. So, Dan, Jeffrey Epstein
never existed. Yeah, back to this, dude. He just
never existed. I don't know what you guys are
talking about about Jeffrey Epstein. The man
never existed. Yeah, I don't know what you're
even talking about. There was no list. The list
didn't exist. Yeah, I could have told you that.
The man didn't exist. You guys are fucking making
a ghost. What fucking island? What island are
we talking about? What island? What human? Ghislaine?
His hot side piece there? Who is she? Was she
real? Dude, I think we ought to just let it go.
I think that's the biggest fucked up thing that
Trump has said is that why are we still talking
about this? It's like, bro, you fucking ran saying
that you were going to release the files. I like
that. Why are we still talking about this? It's
like, I like his supporters are coming around
to it now. Like how retarded this is. They're
realists, you know? I mean, even like the stupidest,
like people are seeing like, Oh, a child molesters
is worse than Trump. Yeah. Like, I'm okay. I'm
okay. Like, fucking Bill Clinton getting his
dick sucked in the White House, that should be
fucking fine. They're both consenting adults.
Yeah, who fucking cares? But fucking kids is
a different thing, which he also did. Which Bill
Clinton also did. But like, I don't even feel
like that should have been a controversy. He's
just like, he's a guy who liked to get his dick
sucked. Hillary's not giving out. You fucking
know Hillary Clinton's not putting out at all.
She's a demon. Why would you even want to get
near it? Yeah. I mean, back in the day, she was
not bad looking, but I don't know why Billy Boy
settled down. She wasn't that great looking either,
let's be honest. The queen was. Yeah, the queen
was. Hillary Clinton? Yeah, Hillary Clinton was.
You'd still fuck her. You wouldn't fuck Hillary
Clinton? I never said that, actually. I just
said she wasn't that great looking. The queen
was a babe back in the day. I was watching the
coronation. In 1952. Yeah, she was really good
looking. Yeah, she was okay too. She looked a
little inbred. Princess Diane was the best one.
Well, she was. She looked fucking gorgeous. She
had legs for days. Big leg guy, actually. I like
the way, I like women's shapely legs. She had
cocks for years. You think that Princess Diane
was a man? I never understood the short haircut.
I love short hair, dude. You do. You got to think
for that, bro. I love short hair. Buzz cuts and
shit. Buzz cuts, short hair, like bobs, like
shoulder length, like fucking chin length. Oh,
love that. Princess Diana was actually killed
by the British government. Like ever since I
was younger. Yeah, that's fucked. Ever since
I was younger, I was big short hair. I fucking
hate long blonde hair specifically. Wow. Yeah,
I like short black or brown hair. Wow. What about
a shaved head? Fine. I like it. I did it. Been
there, done that. Seriously, been there, done
that. Wow, that's rough. They knew Princess Diana
was too fucking liberal, so they took her out.
Is it because she was liberal? I think it's because
she didn't fit the part as a princess. Yeah.
That's fucking crazy, dude. The royal family
is fucking scary. It's like people are always
trying to get out of it. Yeah. You know? Like,
who's the redhead that has that, like, kind of
mulatto girlfriend? The mixed race chick? The
redhead. I don't know. Oh, the one who moved
to America? Yeah. Yeah, Prince Harry. Harry and
what's her face? I don't know. Melissa, I think.
Melissa. Something with an M. Yeah. They, like,
they left the royal family. Yeah. Fuck this noise.
I mean, the royal family doesn't even make sense.
It's fucking, who the fuck cares? It's ceremonial
at best now. Right. But, like, who the fuck cares?
Like, it's a fucking inbred family from the fucking...
The royal line is fucking wonderful. You better
not be talking about my fucking royals like that.
I'm going to go to the pub and eat me some beans
on toast and have myself a good fucking pint
and watch soccer on the pitch or football on
the pitch. It's actually called football. You
call it soccer, you fucking American. Dude, the
fucking Brits are the worst. I hate British accents.
They're the worst, bro. Honest to God. Just imagine
having a British accent. is your fucking internal
monologue all the time. But you know what would
be a worse internal monologue? French. Just imagine
that. Just imagine having a fucking French internal
monologue. You'd be like... Just imagine hearing
that all the time. I'd be like... So you've kicked
off the Jews, the British, the French. Well,
so Indians on there, too. Oh, Israel. You got
the Israel, too. Just imagine that fucking...
Just imagine having... Lord, there's just...
Everybody's on the chopping block today. Just
imagine hearing, hello, my friend. This is your
brain talking to you. I like that one. Jesus
Christ. Hi, I'm your brain. I'm talking to you.
Please, my friend. Please. Listen to what I am
saying. Listen to what I am saying. Do not redeem!
Do not redeem! You ever see those videos? They're
so funny. The guy who does the scams. It's the
Google, yeah, Kit Boga. Kit Boga, it's his YouTube
channel. It's fucking great. He has Indian scammers
call him, and he's like, what? You want me to
get a Google Play card? He uses a voice changer
that makes him very convincingly sound like an
old woman. And then they're just like, okay,
now you have to give me your Microsoft Play card.
She's like, okay. But it says redeem. right here
i put the code in so i'm i'm going i i'm gonna
redeem it i'm gonna i'm gonna redeem it and he's
like do not redeem it no no do not redeem no
bitch yeah those are the best why is there so
many of them indian scammers mom you are a fucking
idiot i think it's because they're i don't know
that's a really good question my my favorite
my favorite foreign accent video It's hysterical.
It's like two girls. They're like singing a song.
And then the mom just like pretty much kicks
the door down and just goes, does someone not
know how to close the door or flush the toilet
when they're taking a shot? Fucking disgusting.
And then just leaves. Is that Scottish or something?
I think it's Scottish. It's whatever that accent
is. But she just comes and goes, does no one
know how to flush the toilet when they take a
shot? Fucking disgusting! It just leaves. Des
-cost -ing. Des -cost -ing! Sounds like fucking
Shrek. I'll have to find that. Just type in,
uh, does no one know how to flush the toilet
when they take a shite? Ellie Mac looks catatonic.
Let's get to a game called Jeopardy. I'm falling
asleep, man. I'm sorry. I didn't get a lot of
sleep last night. Hold on. Hold on. Turn it off.
Turn it off. And don't forget all the toilet
paper. Does somebody not know how to flush the
toilet after they've had a shit? What do you
mean? Well, it was fucking money, yes? Disgusting!
Aw, dude. You're like, aw, bummed out. Yeah.
That's messed up. No one had a problem at all
before they saw it when they take a fucking shite.
But it was fucking one of yours! I said shite.
Shite! You take a shite. Alright. Alright. Alright,
welcome back to Jeopardy. If I score any points,
I'm gonna be happy with myself tonight. God damn
it, Casey! We need more fucking batteries! I
just put batteries in it last time. Yeah! Someone
in it fucking turn it off! Okay. Okay. I'm not
changing the battery. Alright, we're pausing
it. This episode is not... This episode is not
sponsored by Duracell, is what I was about to
say. Welcome back, Jeopardy. Here with your 30
-something time winner, Tyler. 15 or 16 or something
time winner, Dan. Yeah! 16 .5. Number eight,
the Ocho. Yeah! 8 .5. Dude, you've got this music
at deafening levels right now. Turn that shit
fucking down. Holy shit. Alright. What do we
got? Who won last time, by the way? Tyler. Oh
no, I did win at the end, yeah. Alright. Is that
my phone? I believe so. What are you fucking
listening to? Angry Birds the movie. I don't
know why that came up. Phil loves Angry Birds.
Hey, look. I definitely was not actually watching
that. Anyway, you got haunted objects. Who's
going to get that category? General knowledge.
Oh, Canada. Hot diggity dog. Nope. Monomania.
Don't know what that is. In this state and kaboom.
Yeah, Tyler's is gonna be a wash 200 this creepy
doll set to move What what is that? Wait that's
bullshit because we be in Tyler are both waiting
after he got it wrong and then Tyler just I buzzed
first, but he spoke first. Whoever buzzed first.
That would be me. Allie Max points. No. It was.
I swear to fucking God, I pressed it first. I
said it first. Hey, Casey, I'm not putting these
screws in this thing anymore. Because we need
batteries so often. Maybe if we turn it off.
Okay, Casey. Keep it going with that shit. 400,
formerly owned by a man in Oregon and currently
owned by Zach Bagans. This antique wine cabinet
supposedly housed a malevolent... What is the
Dybbuk box? It is a Dybbuk box. How the fuck
do you guys know that? It's a demon box. Keep
it going. Hold on. Wait for it to fucking go.
Okay. Okay. Can be civil here. 600. Because you're
being a fucking asshole. This cursed gem allegedly
responsible. What is the hope diamond? Oh, yeah.
Is this shit real or what? Yes. It says nonchalantly
as he goes back into the popcorn. Haunted object.
800. This doll made in 1904 and owned by a man
in Key West, Florida. What is Robert the doll?
Yes. Haunted object. This is going the way we
thought it would. Yep. I got the two gimmies
that everyone knows. Uh, in the 2002 movie, The
Ring, this now outdi - outdated object was said
to cause the viewer's death in seven days. What
is a VCR? Or, uh, yeah, a VHS. No. What is VHS
tape? VHS tape! I said VHS. You said VCR, you
fucking motherfucker! And then I was like, wait
a second, no, I said VHS. It's fucking, it's
fucking me. No! No! No! No! Hey Casey fuck yourself,
how are you any wrong dude? Yeah, but he sucks
his own cock Casey sucks his own dick and I've
seen it I know he sucks his own dick. He removed
three ribs. Yeah, you only need to remove to
remove fucking three Probably would give it a
shot or two It's not gay. Yes, it is! It's only
gay if you - Audio fellatio! Audio fellatio is
a fucking - is gay. I thought you have to remove
your ribs to do that. It's only gay if you cum
in your own mouth. Next question. Uh, Alleyback's
pick. No, it's not! Keep going. No, there's no
more. General knowledge. Oh, Canada. General
knowledge. Fuck it. I hate you, Casey. I can't
wait till you die and I go to your funeral. Jesus
Christ. 200. This general commanded the Confederate
Army in their defeat. What is Robert E. Lee?
That's his fucking last name and his relative,
bro. You made this fucking game for him. And
he's still not in first. Tyler. Keep going with
this one. 400. This general led the Union Army
to victory. What is General Grant? Yes. Bro.
Casey, you never learn, do you? These fucking
categories. Let's just make the fucking game
for Tyler. Let's do that. It's not made for Tyler.
Dude, you might as well make this who wants to
be a millionaire at this point. Take some American
history. American history? American history.
American generals. 600. This was the top American
general in the Pacific theater of World War II.
Later, it went on to occupy Japan. The Pacific
theater. Know I know this one, but it's I don't
think it's gonna come to me quick enough It's
gonna piss me off when you say it though. I Know
I know the Supreme who is Patton Fucking stupid
guess Casey. Give me your vape. I'm mad. He was
only a three -star general Well, he was a general
he was Who was here? He I'll have you know Ellie
back that last time I literally made a category
for you and you weren't here Well then it didn't
do me much, did it? It was about quantum, like,
physics. It was just called, like, nuclear, uh,
physics. Now I gotta go back and fucking listen
to it. Shit. Anyone know Time Out? That's Douglas
MacArthur. Yeah, I did know that. Fuck me. Alright,
fucking general. 800. Tyler, you got 1 ,000.
1 ,000. What's the standard edition of this question
worth? 800. 800. Considered one of the greatest
military commanders in history, he was the first
emperor of France. What does Napoleon know about
that? Yes. I buzzed in even though it's a daily
double. Yeah, it's a daily double. In all fairness,
he buzzed in too. Yeah. He even beat me on the
fucking incorrect buzz. Tyler's back. I guess
we'll do it for 1 ,000. One of the greatest barbarian
leaders who attacked the Roman Empire. He was
known for ruthlessness and his... What is Genghis
Khan? I don't know why I didn't answer that quicker.
Oh, no. It wasn't Genghis Khan? Nope. Who the
fuck would he be then? Keep going. One of the
greatest barbarian leaders who attacked the Roman
Empire. He was known for his ruthlessness and
his expansion of the Han Empire. That's Genghis
Khan, who is Attila the Hun. Yes. Oh, you fucking
shit. Oh, shit. You suck, Khan. This is Genghis
Khan. Alleyback. You can take your bait back
now. Damn. Alleyback, you got old Canada. That's
a fucking watch. Hot diggity dog. Monomania in
the state and kaboom. Hot diggity dog, I guess.
What the fuck even is that? Alright, 200. Hot
dogs can be made with either frankfurters or
the sausage named for this Austrian capital.
A sausage named for an Austrian capital. What
is that? Oh no. Say it again. Hot dogs can be
made with either frankfurters or the sausage
named for an Austrian capital. Austrian. It's
got to be. If it's Wiener and you didn't give
me the points, I'm going to skull fuck you. That
would be Vienna. Okay. You get by on this one.
If it was Wiener, I literally would have been
very upset. Allie Max pick. Now that you say
it, I know it. 400. Alaskans can order their
hot dogs made with the meat of this animal, also
called reindeer. What is an owl? No. The fuck?
I thought I would have said. Fuck. I'm in the
negative, bro. Is this called a fucking reindeer?
Nope. Another name for a reindeer. Fucking Rudolph?
Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
Don't sink too far in the negative here. I need
you to help me out. Don't throw a pot shot out.
I know you don't really care, but I care. I thought
it was a fucking elk, bro. Hold on. Hold on,
Casey. Well, it ain't a fucking moose, dude.
So if it's not an elk or a moose, I don't know
what we're saying. If you pull this out of your
ass. What is a caribou? Yeah, right same category
600 Fucking shit, please get this Dan, please
Thousand these are three types of meat that normally
are used to produce hot dogs Three types of meat.
And hot dogs. Oh, fuck. Well, I know two of them.
But the third. What the fuck would be the third?
I would imagine there's only beef, pork, and
chicken. He says beef, pork, chicken. That's
correct. Oh, yeah, baby. I was thinking beef
and pork. Well, they use chicken because it's
readily available. Can you just give me the standings?
How you back at Tyler have 1 ,800 Dan's got 1
,000. Oh, yeah. Wait, Dan's all right. He was
at zero. Never mind. Okay. Dan's pick. Same category.
800. This competitive eater has become a 4th
of July legend. What is Joey Chestnut? Yes. Oh,
you said eater? I thought you said year. Let's
get some better pronunciation here, okay? Oh,
okay. Yeah, you're slurring your words. He's
drunk. He's drunk. Let's be talking like the
queen. You need to go to the fucking med, bro?
By devouring dozens of hot dogs in minutes at
Nathan's famous hot dog contest. I would have
guessed Kobayashi and I would have been pissed
if he didn't get it. They both do it, though.
Did you say American? What? Was American part
of that question? No. What are the other categories?
Oh, Canada, monomania, in this state, kaboom.
I'll do in this state. In this state, 200, Palm
Beach County. Wait, in this state? Yeah. What
is Florida? Correct. Damn! Good thing you said
that, because I was going to say something else.
What are you going to say, fucking sunny California?
Keep it going. 400, the geographic center of
the contiguous U .S. Nope. Fuck, that's got to
be... Say it again. It's a geographic center.
Geographic center of the contiguous U .S. Do
you have to say the state? Yeah. What is Kansas?
Oh, yeah. Oh, fuck yeah. That's impressive. What
a close one, Daniel. I would have given you a
fist bump if you got that, and I don't want you
to win. Same category. Hold on. It's because
it's where the nuclear sponge is. Oh, right.
For $600, Talladega Super Speedway. Oh, what
is Talladega? What is Florida? Fuck. No. Talladega.
Hold on. Don't time it out. It's not Florida?
No. You're thinking of Daytona. But I thought
Talladega was also in Florida. No. Hold on a
sec. It's not there. I ain't buzzing. Fuck. Dude,
hold on. I'm thinking it's the other state, but
I'm not going to risk losing more points. Talladega.
Talladega. Talladega. Talladega Nights. Talladega.
Talladega, South Carolina, baby. Are you buzzing
in? No. Was it Georgia? Time out. It was Alabama.
Oh, thank God. Good thing I didn't buzz in. I
like Max Pick. Keep it going. 800. Mount Rainier.
Fuck! I know this. Mount Rainier. Ooh, actually.
Mount Rainier. What is Washington? Washington,
correct. Fuck yeah, Dan. Fuck yeah, Dan. Dude,
he wanted to see Mount Rainier. Sky King. Yeah.
Let's go and see the Olympics. That's true. Shit.
Dan's pick. Your fucking neurons are firing tonight.
Shit. Is Mount Rainier the tallest mountain in
America? I think so. No, it's not. No. No, it's
not. Oh, I thought it was. Mount Marcy definitely
isn't. For $1 ,000, the Rio Grande River. The
Rio Grande River? Rio Grande River. Well, that's
a territory, but that's Puerto Rico, right? No,
it's a river. What? Yeah, the Rio Grande River.
Yeah asking what state what states are there?
Well, there's a Rio Grande in Puerto Rico. So
I'm buzzing state the territory No, but he did
not that Regardless there is a Rio Grande there.
I'll take my serious Yeah, look up Rio Grande
Puerto Rico, bro. It's not a state. It's not
a state So if you don't want to give me the points,
I understand but if you take my points I'm gonna
not taking your points away, but it's not state.
All right Good. I think I know it, but I don't
want to lose. I think I do, too, but I'm not
risking it at all. New Mexico. It was either
New Mexico or Texas. Or Colorado. Is there more?
You got Old Canada, Hot Diggity Dog, Monomania,
Kaboom. Kaboom. Kaboom seems like it could be
something. 200. Strontium is used to produce
a bright red color in the night sky for these
4th of July favorites. What are fireworks? Yes.
I was going to say, what is M80s? I thought fireworks
was too obvious. Fireworks was too obvious. I
know I would have got it wrong and I would have
been really mad. Same category. 400. Cannon Fire
is included in traditional performances of this
Russian composer's 1812 overture. I know the
song. What is Tchaikovsky? Oh, how do you get
that one? Ali Mack. Ali Mack. Jesus Christ. That
was amazing. Have you been brushing up on your
life? No, that was a guess. It just sounded Russian,
and I knew it was a classical composer. I very
well could have gone with that. That was amazing.
That was amazing. I like Ali Mack. I don't really
think it's doing anything. I'm falling asleep.
Allie Mack and Dan tied for first. Allie Mack's
book. Keep it going. 600. It's the nine -letter
explosion that occurs during the last evolutionary
stages of a massive star. Wait, you said nine
letters? Supernova. Supernova. Oh, I'm still
counting on my fucking fingers. That was good.
That was good. I'll be back. Keep it going. You're
on fire. You're on kaboom. 800. 1945. So this
U .S. tests the world's first nuclear weapon.
Sorry, go ahead. Hold on. The U .S. tests the
worst first nuclear weapon in the state's Jordana
del Muerto desert. Nevada. No. New Mexico. Fuck.
Yeah, he's right. Fuck! Damn, I thought you were
gonna get that I thought it was Nevada dude.
No Nevada. That's that's the gray area I can't
still cuz I also knew that and wanted to buzz
in but Tyler just steamrolled me Yeah, Nevada
Nevada is where they started testing after that
was like the that was the the later. That was
the later years Tyler's peg Oh Canada hot diggity
dog monomania kaboom One thousand Most popular
chemical weapon in World War I and the most popular
chemical weapon in... What is mustard gas? Wait,
I got to finish the question. It's a two -part
question. Most popular chemical weapon in World
War I and the most popular chemical weapon in
Vietnam. What is mustard gas in napalm? Oh, yeah.
Wow. I was going to say Agent Orange. Yeah. I
was thinking there's no way that's right. No,
we fucking torched that. No, it was actually
napalm was more... We torched the fuck out of
those. I mean, we did use a shit ton of napalm,
but I thought Agent Orange was technically a
chemical weapon, and napalm is... It's just,
if I can remember correctly... Napalm is a chemical,
though. I thought it was an incendiary thing.
Well, yeah, it's a chemical, though. Napalm is
a mixture of... Styrofoam and diesel fuel, right?
No, naphemic and palmitic acid. I always thought
that that was just like an ignition thing. It
causes an ignition when you blow it up, yeah.
And isn't it like liquid fire? No, it's just
basically like sticky fire. It's liquid sticky
fire. It causes fire when you throw it on shit,
yeah. It's like a gel that just fucking ignites.
But I don't think Agent Orange was all that effective
because of the rolling hills. So, but it did
take out all the grass and the foliage. Yeah,
but so does napalm. Yeah, so we really like that,
though. Allie Mac, you got O Canada, Hot Diggity
Dog, and Monomania. Fuck it. I don't want to
do this because I know it's going to piss me
off, but let's do Monomania. All right. For 200.
You got 4 ,000. What are the other scores? Ty's
got 2 ,800. Dan's got 1 ,600. Damn. I wish it
wasn't the 200 question. I need to take this
out. That shit's gasoline. I'll play conservative
just because I don't know what the category is.
Let's go 200. Alright. Short for mononucleosis.
The kissing disease is caused by this virus.
What is herpes simplex? Oh god. Come on. You're
fucking mono. What is Epstein -Barr? Oh, right.
Oh, oh. That's what I... You can't steal it,
though. It's a daily double. I keep... See, this
is why I didn't want to do that category, because
I forget it's mono. Shit. Fucking retard, Ally
Mac. No, that's... Give me that vape back. I'm
pissed off. You're fucking killing it. You're
killing it. You only lost 200 points. I know.
You're fucking killing it, bro. Oh, my God. Almost
made it into a true daily double, though. Give
me a second. Ally Mac's pick. I need some water
here. Tyler's taking a timeout. We need a...
Oh. Sweet. Ally Mac's big. No, just hold on a
second. Holy fuck. You only get one time out,
Tyler. That kicked my ass. I stay away from it.
Dude, that gave me like a fucking... That gave
me like a head high that I haven't had in a while.
What did? The black cherry fucking Zinzi ass.
Dude, this is fucking brutal. Ally Mac, your
pick. Keep rolling with mono. 400. In art and
design, this term refers to a color scheme based
entirely... It was monochromatic. Yes. Fuck yeah.
Fuck yeah, Dan. Would monochrome have worked
for that? Probably. That's what I was going to
say. Dan's pick. Same category. 600. This single
lens optical device lets you spy with one eye
only. What is a monocle? Can you flip that down
so I can see that more? I can't see it from that
angle. Okay, I just want to make sure I didn't
shut it off. Dan's pick. Same category. 800 this
type of train runs on the single track All three
of us positive mono for for a thousand thousand
Describes government rule by a single person.
What is monarchy? I wasn't prepared for Tyler
to get that one. That would have really sent
me over the edge. Tyler, I love you, but it would
have pissed me off. All right, let's get this
out of the way. Oh, Canada. 200. He was born
in Ontario and hosted game shows like High Rollers,
The Wizard of Odds, and one more popular one
you might know. No. It was Alex Trebek. Yes.
Yeah, of course it's Jeopardy. Yeah, we probably
could have connected the dots on that, to be
honest. We'll go all the way to 1 ,000 for Canada.
1 ,000. This province tried to secede from Canada
in referendums. It was Nova Scotia. No. No? It
wasn't Nova Scotia? They had their own try to
Brexit with that, with Nova Scotia. Look that
up, because I think it was Nova Scotia tried
to as well. Can you finish the question? This
territory tried to secede from Canada in referendums
held in 1980 and 1995. So unless they were in
those years, I'm not correct. Because the most
recent one is Nova Scotia. I think I know it,
but I'm not going to say it. Oh, that was in
1867 for Nova Scotia, Tyler. It counts. I said
1980 and 1995. Well, you didn't finish the question.
Say it one more time. This province tried to
secede from Canada in referendum so 1980 in 1995.
I Actually don't know But I would guess Vancouver
Timeout, I would guess Prince Edward. I look
back. Thank God Thank fucking Christ for that
timeout Oh Tyler's page Tyler's big 800 800 This
Canadian city hosted the 2010 Winter Olympics.
What is Vancouver? Vancouver! I almost busted
and said Sochi. I almost busted and said that.
600. 600. A vast array of natural land and tundra,
this Canadian territory directly borders Alaska.
Oh, Alaska. Fuck. And it's a popular spot for
gold mining. Where's the Northwest Territory?
Oh, no. That's actually territory, Dan. In Canada?
Yeah, it is. Oh, shit. I don't blame you then.
Northwest, you'd think it's fucking over there,
right? It borders Alaska? Yeah. Hold on. Hold
on. Hold on. Let me ask Chad at GPT. Can you
just ask the question one more time? A vast array
of natural land and tundra, this Canadian territory
directly borders Alaska. It's a popular spot
for gold mining. The gold mining gives it, gives
it, oh fuck. It's, uh... I'm gonna be so pissed
when I'm on this. Whatever, fuck it. Fuck it.
It's, uh, Yukon. Damn, I thought that was in
the U .S. I'd need to. I thought that was like
Montana or something. That literally went through
my head like 10 times of Yukon, but I did not
for a minute think that was in Canada. I think
you're thinking of the college. Tyler got old
Canada and hot diggity dog. Canada. 400. A leaf
from this tree is at the center of the Canadian
flag. That is Tyler. Oh, fuck. Tyler got it.
I thought I got that one. Hot dogs for 1 ,000.
All right, finally for 1 ,000. This kind of bun
is often split along the top instead of the side.
It is named after a U .S. region. U .S. region?
Say that again. This kind of bun is often split
along the top instead of the side. It is named
after a U .S. region. I always just call it a
fucking hot dog bun. It's the one that's split
in the top, though. Split in the top? Yeah, not
on the side. I guess it depends on which way
you hold it. Yeah. What the fuck is making hot
dogs like this? What? Wait, how is it split?
So it's like a sub? No. It's like, you know how
hot dog rolls? Turn it sideways and cut it? You
just cut the crust part instead? What the fuck?
Who's eating these hot dogs? People from this
US region. No, what the fuck? What does this
hot dog bun look like? Describe this to me. I
don't think you can describe it. How do you cut
a hot dog roll, Tyler? You fucking cut it this
way. It's a fucking long roll that you cut on
the top. Yeah, but do you cut it on the brown
side or do you cut it on the white side? It all
is the white side. Do you turn it to the side
and cut it or do you cut it on the top? I'm not
buzzing. I cut it on the top. The top part. The
middle of the bun that's split open like this.
Oh yeah, then you're from this region. Because
the normal way is turn it on the side and then
cut it. What the fuck are you talking about?
Like I'm still I'm trying to figure out what
the fuck that you're talking about. You can either
cut a bun on the top of the bun or on the side.
I think it's safe to say we can time the question.
The side is like the white part and the top is
like the crust like the brown part. So dude it
always looks like you're thinking that every
hot dog bun is split on the top. Yeah. It's not.
It's not. Yeah. Yeah, the standard hot dog, I
guess from the way he's describing a split on
the side it is Consider the brown part at the
top and the other brown part at the bottom. Yeah
white and the middle white is aside split the
middle You turn it on the side right the way
you see it. It's flipped on its side So you fucking
split it did the fucking course. It looks like
you're putting the hot dog in the top It's actually
the side of the bun So somewhere some psychopath
somewhere in some region this country some psychopaths
plural are cutting down the brown part Well,
I'm fucked anyways. What is a Midwest hot dog?
It says Midwest, no. That would be hilarious
if you got that, dude. Is it American? I'm not
buzzing in, but is it American? That's New England
rolls. Oh, I was going to say Northeast. Can
you show me a picture of a New England hot dog
roll comparatively to a standard hot dog roll?
Because I'm still trying to wrap my head around
what the fuck this looks like. Dude, I feel like
that is so petty. That is petty. Like you see
how this is the size of the hot dog with the
white part, right? You cut it out on the top
that's New England roll if you cut out the white
part, it's a it's a regular hot dog That's a
regular hot dog cut it on the side Yeah, well
Albany is very close to New England So we use
New England style. Yeah, yeah. So wait a second.
We've been eating hot dogs wrong this whole time?
Yes. Hold on. What? People cut it the other way?
Why would you cut it that way? I'm glad I didn't
get a hot dog in Puerto Rico. Fucking Christ.
I would lose my mind if someone... What is this?
But if you buy... I just bought hot dog rolls
from Stortz, though. Those are cut the regular
way. Which regular way? The regular, like, not
New England. Like, on the side. I would be pissed
if somebody gave me the regular way of hot dogs.
What the fuck is this thing? What clown do you
have in the kitchen back there? Are you guys
retarded? Damn, I might grill some hot dogs.
Seriously, guys, have you ever seen a hot dog
another way? No. I have. I've seen what he's
talking about. I've never seen it done that way.
Yeah, but it makes it kind of look like a slice
of bread folded over. yeah i guess like genuinely
i've never seen it done the other way yeah like
i is it just you have you just you just didn't
register that there was two different kinds in
your mind Yeah, but, like, I'm just genuinely
used to it. It's like the Mandela effect, right?
No, but I'm just genuinely, like, every hot dog
place around here cuts it the normal way. Like,
not the normal way, but our normal. No, I've
had hot dogs that are cut the other way. Like,
Hot Dog Charlie's is our way. Gus's Hot Dogs
is our way. Like, all these, like, local hot
dog places are all, like, the brown hot dogs.
So it's the ones that look like these. Yeah,
yeah, yeah. I'm used to seeing the top part split
in half. I mean, me too. But I now recognize
these are a little bit more out there than I
thought they were. All right, Final Jeopardy.
Tyler's got 3 ,000. AllieMac's got 4 ,800. Ooh,
Dan's got 2 ,000. Anybody's game still. Category?
Don't tell me geography or I will smack you in
the cock. Jesus Christ. What was the score again?
Tyler's got 3 ,000. AllieMac's got 4 ,800. Dan's
got 2 ,000. Category, let's go with... Wait,
give me the scores one more time. Allie Mack
got 4 ,800. Tyler's got 3 ,000. Dan's got 2 ,000.
Category statistics But not like the math kind
like like statistics like this is a stat Wait,
give me the scores one more time. I'm sorry.
I always got 3000 I max got 4800 Dan's got 2000
Give me the scores one more time. Oh my Jesus
fucking Christ. I wasn't paying attention because
I wasn't asking the question. Dan, you have 2
,000. All right, what does everybody else got?
Allie Mac's got 4 ,800. Damn. Tyler's got 3 ,000.
Damn. You know Pedro Pascal, the actor? What?
You know the actor Pedro Pascal? No. The guy
who plays Mandalorian? No. The guy who plays
the fucking dude in Last of Us? I didn't see
that. The guy who's playing Mr. Fantastic in
the new Fantastic Four? I didn't watch that.
I'm not really into superhero shit. Unless it's
like Spider -Man. Do you know why? Do you know
Pedro Pascal, the actor? Yeah. All right, I got
your wagers. Wait, you said Tyler had 3K? Yeah.
Okay, yeah, my bet stinks. Got your wagers. Wager.
Question. This is the U .S. state with the highest
African -American population in the U .S. by
percentage. I feel like this is racist. Why?
I just feel like it is. Okay, Dad feels like
it's racist. I feel like this question's racist,
and we ought to throw it out. Fuck. Because this
is not a racist podcast. This is the U .S. state
with the highest African -American population
in the U .S. by percentage. What are you doing
on your phone over there, Tyler? I was texting
my girl. Yeah. Let's see your screen there. I
put in... I put in... I texted her at the state.
He's like, chat GPT. I'm playing this game under
protest. Yeah, now I can't see your screen. I
was playing Jeopardy and I sent you that by mistake.
You sent me something? No, I sent her. Oh, mistake.
Can you say the question again? Yeah, I do need
to hear that one more time. The U .S. state with
the highest African -American population in the
U .S. by percentage. Okay, we can figure this
out. Say it one more time, just so maybe it sparks
a couple neurons firing around. The state with
the highest African -American population in the
U .S. by percentage. I don't know what I want
to say. I don't know if it's right. It could
be like a whole fucking carousel of them, to
be honest. This is fucked up. Tyler's got a lot
of typing on that keyboard over there. Did he
already put it in? Hold on, I'm going to use
some logic to figure this out. I'm pretty sure
it's what I said. Fuck. He's pretty sure. I have
no idea and he's pretty sure. What the fuck?
God damn it. Hold on a sec. Let's use some logic
here. Black people are naturally going to be
gravitated towards the same latitude as Africa.
Okay? So that counts out the northeastern United
States. Okay? So that leaves us somewhere in
the south. Right? California, socioeconomically,
probably not possible for a lot of them. So let's
count out California. Texas. I mean, there's
some black cowboys. Not a lot of them. I like
the thought process. Dan's got some Rain Man
shit going on in his head. Casey, can I get that
vape back? Now I'm stressed. I got it narrowed
down to Atlanta and Florida. To Georgia and Florida.
And I'm going to have to flip a fucking coin
in. Because I would say I don't think I don't
know, Dan. A lot of white people live in Florida.
A lot of black people live in Florida too, though.
I promise. Yeah. Although I've never met. That's
like a snowbird state. It is. That's why I stayed
away from Florida. And then I've never met a
black person that said they were from Florida.
Maybe they don't leave. I'm going to have to
say Georgia because I just know there's so many
rappers from Atlanta, Georgia. I said Georgia
as well. I also said Georgia. Georgia, Casey.
So either it's mutually assured destruction.
We all said the same thing. So either we all
get it or we all don't. It still comes down to
the wagers, though, at the end of the day. All
right, Dan. Dan says Georgia. Incorrect. I got
it wrong. Dan, you bet $19 .99. Dan's down to
$1. Tyler says Georgia. Incorrect. I was genuinely
thinking of Atlanta, Georgia. Tyler bet $2 ,900.
He's down to $100. Alleyback says, what is it,
Georgia? I don't know. Stupid question. Alleyback,
you bet $1 ,500. Down to $3 ,300. Oh, shit. Alleyback
wins. Damn. A clean win. What was the answer?
The answer was Mississippi. Fucking Mississippi.
I've never heard of such a thing. I almost said
Missouri. Yeah, I didn't know there was plantations
in Mississippi, Dan. I did not. I never even
think of it. Mississippi never crosses my mind
ever for any reason. Damn, I'm the Nueve now.
Damn, that was some Adderall -fueled injustice.
I don't think so, man. I've been falling asleep
the whole time. I don't think that Adderall's
doing much. That was clutch. That was a great
game. That was clutch. Damn. Hell yeah. This
is sick. I think really the deal breaker was
that I'm not nearly as high as I usually am during
Jeopardy. Damn. I gotta step it up. Every time
I'm sober during Jeopardy, I do good. I think
that's really the kicker. If I like getting fucked
up when I'm here. I'm bringing my fucking A -game
next time. I'm gonna bring my fucking encyclopedia
with me. Not bad, dawg. Not bad. So do you think
monks are the gooners of religion? Dude, I think
they're anti -gooner, actually. Dude, all they
do is sit around all day and fucking jerk off.
Dude, you know what? We talked about that two
episodes ago. No, it actually got cut out. Did
you? No, it got cut out. Why'd you cut it out?
Because, remember, the whole thing got cut? Oh,
yeah, the first half hour. Yeah, that was pretty
bad. Yeah, if they're the gooners, I don't think
so, dude, because monks are always trying to
abstain from everything. Like to the point where
they drive themselves insane. They're like, I'm
not jerking off. I'm only eating oatmeal. I'm
not, I'm not even looking at a TV screen. I'm
just going to sit here and make, you know, the
same noise over and over again. Do you think
that elevates you to like a different mental
state? No, I just like, you ever do like donut
November? Yeah, dude. I've done like no, not
like not, no, not what a long time about porn.
Five years. How did it, how did it help your
mental state? How did it help me? Um, I don't
know that it did. Honestly, I don't know that
it did. Yeah. I mean, I, I don't know. I think,
I think you gotta like, you gotta release occasionally.
Otherwise you're fucking, I don't know. I feel
like it's not good for you. It's not, you actually,
uh, have higher risk of prostate. I think once
a week is like ideal. Like if you can get to
that, but like four times a day is a little excessive.
So somewhere. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Four times a
day is excessive. It's excessive. Do you agree
or disagree with that? Debatable. What if you
just edge to one orgasm for the entire day? Do
you think that's excessive? Edge. So you edged
and then just release at the end of the day.
Yeah. You just fucking straight sit there just
on the brink all day. We can shut this off now.
We actually asked Chet GPT that. How do you truly
shut this thing off completely, Tyler? You just
hold the button. You just touch the power button.
Like, hold it. What is that light even for? It's
blinking with one. Here, let me see. Just take
the fucking battery out. There we go. Problem
solved. Don't mix it with the dead ones. Dude,
I'm gonna fucking slip into a coma when I get
home. Yeah, dude, I don't know. I think excessive
is like, if you gotta do it more than three times
a day, that's a little much. I feel like it should
just be restricted based off of time spent. What
do you mean? Like, I feel like it's not necessarily
how many times you're fucking cranking one. It's
how long you're taking doing it. No! Wait. no
way i've never heard duration is like yeah but
dude if you're all right so i for one don't watch
porn but if you were to since when for a long
literally since i've been with cc i haven't felt
the need to yeah you're fucking you're just the
fucking stand -up you're a stand -up guy i can't
give up that kind of novelty are you kidding
me i just think that i'll be honest but i'll
be honest about it it's because when i was single
for so long before her it's just porn just sets
this such unrealistic dude right like it doesn't
compare and then i go back to i don't know it's
just weird yeah it helps you like getting back
into having sex regularly was really fucking
weird for me just because it was like i hadn't
done shit for four years like right and ever
since then it's just i don't know porn's been
weird to me Damn. Why is this thing still on?
You took one out and the light is still on. There's
people that go like months just like edging and
never have an orgasm and they just edge for like
six months. That's so bad for your brain. Like
every day. It causes like brain damage. Like
how can you just not fucking cum? Just dumping
all your serotonin. I feel like gooning is so
much worse than edging though. But people do
that. Isn't that what gooning is though? No,
gooning is when you edge so much you literally
like go into like a fucking trench. Wow. I want
to try that once. Now that I got some time. Even
in my porn days, I did not fucking find myself
in a porn train. Supposedly, you get to the point
where you're pretty much just like out of body
experience type thing. And when you nut, you
just nut across the room. I've heard stories
of people doing that. He's heard stories. That's
how you do it. You edge so much that you get...
I heard legends. I'm doing like a permanent trance.
I've heard legends. You just get stuck in an
eternal edging cycle from hell. You just coon
forever. Alex, you've missed work for three straight
days. What? You fucking blue ball yourself every
day for six months. That's how you turn into
a goonie. It hurts. You ever get blue balled
and it fucking hurts? Yeah. Temporarily. No,
I know. It's not like a fucking long -term thing,
but you're like, God, ow. ow it's like when you
like stop taking a piss halfway through yeah
it's like uncomfortable for a minute and then
it goes away i've only gotten it a couple times
like i dude i don't know sometimes like when
i'm trying not to nut right like say like i want
to like chi up you know get some energy internal
energy going and i'm like i dude your fucking
dick's hard it's like the morning you're just
like rubbing it And it's just like, you know
what I'm talking about. And you're just trying
not to. And the next thing you know, you're like
just jerking a little bit. And then you're like,
all right, but I'm not going to nut. I'm not
going to nut. And you're just, you know, and
then you end up edging. And, like, I've done
that, dude. And then by the end of the day, I've
edged all fucking day. And then just fucking
shoot across the fucking room. That's what gooning
is. Dan, you're gooning. Yeah, that's exactly
what it is. I'm a gooner, though. That's exactly
what it is, Dan. I didn't know. I thought that
was just edging. That's the episode title right
there. Dan's a gooner. It's not the worst thing,
I guess. Yes, it is. Dude, you said it was like
a demonic ritual. I'm just jerking into the edge
just before completion. I mean, for me, man,
I'm not, I'm not going to lie. I get morning
wood when I wake up. I have no sexual drive in
the morning to speak of. I'm not a morning person.
So yeah, my dick will be hard, but mentally I'm
not in that mood at all. Wow. I feel bad because
sometimes that's a one -way feeling with me and
it's like, I don't want to do that right now.
This episode is going to be called Gooting with
Dan and Jeffrey Epstein. No, I don't like the
Jeffrey Epstein part. Gooting with Dan, I'm good
with. But you throw in a fucking child predator.
That changes things. So I have a theory. I was
watching this Dale Earnhardt documentary. Fuck
yeah. The intimidator. Unemployment activities.
Hell yeah. Yeah. So Dale Earnhardt, he was given
a lot of clues that he was going to die before
it happened. Yeah. And he was saying like, you
know, somebody said, oh, well, you know, this
next race coming up. And he's like, yeah, if
I make it to that. And it's like, well, what
the fuck is that supposed to mean? Was he suicidal,
you think? Well, no, I, I think, I think I got
a theory that Dale Earnhardt. All right. He's
like a Southern legend icon. Oh yeah. Right.
Dale Earnhardt got HIV. He got the HIV. And he,
there's no way that he, that could ever get out
because dude, that's in the, in the fucking Bible
thumping Southern States. Dale Earnhardt has
HIV. Yeah. Dale Earnhardt. got hiv fucking hookers
fucking prostitutes suicided himself into the
wall and that's what caused 9 -11 and then that
caused the glitch in the matrix and then 9 -11
happened a few months later right oh my god jesus
christ september right because what's your birthday
it was 29th april 29th yeah me and him were born
on the same oh oh you didn't you i thought your
birthday was the day no no no me and him were
born the same day september so that was what
what day did he die i think he probably died
the summer like july or something yeah and then
it was a couple days later like a couple months
later yeah a couple months later yeah it's fucked
that's why yeah because he had fucking yeah dude
it's fucking crazy things you never know i was
watching that documentary I'm saying this like
this is truth. I completely fabricated all of
this. Well, you know the last episode went that
way too. Why? When? The 4th of July episode where
you talked about shipping the black people to
Africa. I did not. I never said that. No, you
said we saved them by taking them from Africa.
No, we actually did though. I'm 100 % serious
about that. I will die on that fucking hill.
Just one second here. My dad sent me a text message
of a song that he says sounds like a fat guy
walking to McDonald's. And this is the song.
Just a fat guy? Yeah, it really does. What is
that song? It's called Them Changes by Thundercat.
Wow. That song sounds really corny. It's a good
song. I actually like it. I was sitting here.
It's fucking midnight. I get a text message from
my fucking dad. It's a picture of him listening
to the song in his car. It just says, Fat guy
walking to McDonald's song, period. That's it.
That's all that was in that text message. Dude,
your dad is like... Because he's pretty young.
He's 40... Yeah. 47? Dude, that's crazy. 46.
Your dad is 11 years older than me. Yeah. That's
fucking wild. Dad could be Tyler's daddy. Could
I be your dad? No. No, you're 28. You're 28?
I'm 27. 27. I was born in 98. Oh, suck. I could
be your dad if I had you at eight years old.
If you were on Jeffrey Epstein's island, you
could be Tyler's dad. Jesus fucking Christ. I
don't even understand that. I'm trying to wrap
my head around what you just said. How much older
are you than him? I'm eight years older. Well,
exactly. If you were on Jeffrey Epstein's island.
If I was on Jeffrey Epstein's island. Yeah. I
could be his... I'm done with that. Tyler's like,
I gotta go. I gotta drive fucking eight hours
tomorrow. Damn. Where are you going, Tyler? Vermont.
Oh, I'm sorry. That had to happen to you. I was
born in Vermont. Leave them alone. Were you?
Yeah. Dude, Vermont's the worst. It's part of
my job. I gotta go out there. So depressing.
Do some shit. It's just a bunch of Democrats
and a lot of weed. Are we gonna do the outro?
Alright, thanks for listening. If you think Jeffrey
Epstein didn't kill himself, then email us until
the podcast 73 at gmail .com. Oh my God. I just
fixed that. Jesus Christ. What is he doing to
your son? I don't know. I just fixed it though.
It's not, there's not a water apparently. What?
Oh, it's stuck on again. No, it's not. It's not.
It's not going. And as always, uh, anyway, be
kind to yourselves and each other. We out. Fuck
off. For all we know, robots have souls. We just
don't know if they do or don't. How do you know?
Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot? You think
we were the first ones to inhabit this planet?
Fuck no. No, no, we are jumping down this fucking
rabbit hole. Yes, we are. There's people out
there with some really dumb thoughts. Extended
episode. Where the fuck did the skirmish come
from? Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?
You're telling me that they didn't die and become
ghosts? They're killing already born babies and
sell them to the Chinese. Alien race. somewhere
in china all right in some base what the fuck
there are super soldiers that are at least nine
or ten feet tall super soldiers then they are
extraterrestrials they are aliens what before
my eyes while holding their pulse feel them die
of this virus you feel bump bump bump beep nothing
they're fucking gone i've seen it happen i think
that the government has taken it to the next
level with the birds they know what birds are
going to cross paths with you that you are going
to be able to raise and they are going to make
them so fucking real they're going to sink money
into them because they know that if you put that
mother's Which, by the way, big brother, is the
overlord. We're only living in the third dimension!
Nazi collaborator. Okay? I'm not fucking lying.
It's fucking real. Okay? Look it up. Look it
up. He says that he was doing this shit. George
Soros actually worked...