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The following program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.

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Fewer discretion is advised.

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This program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.

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This program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.

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Alright, alright, cut the music! Cut the fucking music! Cut the music now! What the fuck, Casey?

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This is how we're starting this episode, episode 97, one of our most important episodes.

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You're fucking calling ha- so Casey just cut out two minutes of great content.

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It's okay, Tyler, it was basically like nothing.

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No, it wasn't. We talked about Kanye West and how he was insane.

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Welcome to Untold Podcast, episode 97.

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This episode fucking sucks already. Fuck you.

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This is the Kanye West Valentine's Day special.

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Buy Kanye West merch, the slasika shirts.

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Here with Kyle and Tyler.

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Thank you, thank you.

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My left stroke just went viral!

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Oh, right stroke, put that baby in a spiral.

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There's level two in here.

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Oh, yeah, that's it.

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It's me humble.

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Sit down.

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Go ahead, sit down.

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What a start to the episode.

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Sit down.

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We left off, Kyle was telling the story.

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If you got gigantic cans for the third time, I'm coming for you listeners, all right?

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Male or female titties. I love titties. Love them all.

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Would you fuck, would you, would you titty fuck a fat man?

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If you have, if you were blindfolded and you were told it was a woman and then-

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Do I get to blow a load on the face and take a picture after?

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Yes.

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Then yeah.

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What if it was Casey?

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I would titty fuck the shit out of Casey right now.

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I'd make him my little toaster strudel. You like that, baby?

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What the fuck?

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It just sucks.

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Anyway, Kyle, where did you leave off? Where did we leave off with your fucking-

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We'll start off from the beginning because they didn't hear that.

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My Valentine's Day story.

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We have some sexy Valentine's Day stories for you guys.

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He'll tell his, I'll tell you how I lost my virginity.

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Casey, you got to think up a one.

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Me and my buddy Pat, we get half-assed recruited to a D3 college to play lacrosse.

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We go there, we wind up being roommates.

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At the college, there was two floors.

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The first floor had four quads on it.

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Each quad had four rooms that shared a bathroom.

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Pretty much wings, the quad was a wing.

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But it was four rooms to the wing with the bathroom.

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The first floor had a common room.

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The second floor had a balcony that looked over the common room.

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The entire building shared the common room.

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Me and Pat lived in a triple.

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There was one triple per quad.

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But we didn't have a third roommate.

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So our room kind of became the party room or whatever.

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So everybody always came to our room to party, this and that.

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I guess that's not that important to the story.

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But this guy John lived in Syracuse, which was maybe 20 minutes from our college.

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We were in school in Utica.

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And he goes, why don't you guys come to my house, my parents house.

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I'm going to throw a little house party, whatever.

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It was one of those breaks where you got two days off in the week or whatever.

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So you got a four day weekend.

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So we go up there.

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And this kid John, who lived next door to us.

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Actually, I got two stories out of this.

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Remind me to tell another story after this one.

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Because John, a lot of things happened between me and John.

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Great friends, still great friends.

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But John, he met this girl, Carly on Tinder.

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I don't know if it was Tinder or what.

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It was a dating site.

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I don't know if Tinder was around then.

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Shout out to Carly.

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Yeah. Carly's a good, she plays a pivotal part in this story.

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But she's from Buffalo.

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So he meets her.

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She happens to be in the area.

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She comes to the little house party at John's mom's house.

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So now you got a picture.

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We're all about 19 years old.

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And we're getting fucked up.

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We're just smoking Gravity Bongs, gas masks, and just drinking fucking Natty Lights.

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Because that's the cheapest fucking beer.

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We got no money.

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None of us have jobs.

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Natty Ice, dude.

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And so we're all fucked up.

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This girl Carly, it was a little pot look thing.

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She made a fantastic pasta salad, right?

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So good.

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The right amount of vinegar, a couple of vegetables in there.

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Pasta was so good.

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Tri-color pasta.

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Not that important to the story.

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I like the fatness is coming out.

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Adds a little color to the story.

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There wasn't too much celery in it.

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White people like to put a lot of celery in their fucking pasta salad.

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I'm talking about the sex story, but goddamn, she made some really good fucking food.

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It's not too important to the story, but it is.

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Because the pasta salad was great.

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So we decide that it was time to go to bed or whatever.

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John and Carly are going to sleep on the floor.

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And there's another couple, fucking Craig and Ashley, are going to sleep next to them.

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And then there was three single guys in this room, which was me, Cody, who were at his house.

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And Pat, my college roommate, we were like, all right, we were going to cat dog it on the bed.

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But we were like, fuck, one guy is going to have two set of feet instead of one set of feet.

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So we were like, fuck it, we're going to sleep normal and just no homo.

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You always do something with the homo, and it's not homo anymore.

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Right.

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Craig and Ashley, you could tell they're already banging because that's all they do.

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They've been together before college even started.

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So they're banging.

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And Carly decides to go down on John.

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So she's blowing them.

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And the three of us are just talking shit the whole time.

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Like, oh, John, you getting your fucking dick sucked in front of the boys, fucking faggot.

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Fucking hard dick out. There's more men in here than girls.

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You know, we're just fucking we're just mad that we're not getting our dick sucked.

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You know, as you would try to give him shit.

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Finally, we calmed down and we're like, all right, let John do his business.

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And we got nothing but throw blankets on except for like Cody.

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So your cocks are out at this point, just under blankets.

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Well, I'm pretty sure somebody's jerking off in the bed.

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I'm not, you know, if I was, I'd gladly tell you. But I remember I had a blanket on.

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I'm six foot two. So I got a blanket on that's about three foot tall.

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Right. So it's not really covering anything up.

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So my feet are hanging out, my head's hanging out.

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Same thing with Pat. His feet are hanging out.

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It's a twin size. No, it was a full size mattress.

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Just enough to fit three broad boys in.

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But our feet are hanging off the fucking bed.

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And I just like all I'm hearing is dick sucking noises.

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And it stops for like a second.

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I was like, man, I'm like part of me was like, call John a faggot.

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But out of nowhere, my big toe gets enveloped by a nice pair of fucking lips.

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And she's blowing my big toe like it's a fucking like it's a hard cock.

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And she like pulls off. It does that.

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You know how when they pull off, they do that little mouth pop thing?

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You know, she does that.

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Then she goes down to Pat.

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She would she sucked mine and Pat's fucking toes for 10 minutes straight.

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Like she was going to get a nut out of them, bro. Jesus Christ.

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It was the craziest fucking thing.

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Like sticks with me to this day.

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I'm like, she was trying to make my toe cum. Did you cum though?

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Did you cum though?

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Well, I came right after for sure.

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That's when I turned around and fucking blew a load in the fucking bed sheets.

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On the other side, you know, but the story gets better.

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Like I've never I never see this girl again.

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Right. Like so I'm like, whatever, it's go to suck my toes, which is fantastic.

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Did you cock hard? I blew a fat load.

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And then she went back to sucking John's cock or whatever the hell they did.

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You know, he got his nut off after.

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And so I'm like, I'm never going to see this Carly girl again. She's from Buffalo.

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And so my friends grew back home.

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We got this this kid, Chris, one of my best friends, and he's the version at the time.

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Now we're like 21. Right.

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I'm pretty sure he's still a virgin.

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So we go up to Lee's campground. I own that.

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Fuck you. And you fucking whatever fucking great grandpa.

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Yeah. I'll put you all fucking prison. Remember that?

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And so I get a quote like I just moved back probably a year and a half before this.

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I get in a relationship, fall out of the relationship, start getting all my friends grew back from my school.

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I just start hanging out with all these guys again.

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So I get a text from my gay and black friend, Teddy. Right.

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He's like, hey, we're going to Lee's campground. She come with us. I'm like, all right, I'll come up with you.

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So it's me, Teddy, who's gay, black twink. Right.

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My my best friend and comedy partner, Drew, who's just he's basically me with a bigger deck. Right.

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And blonde hair and Chris, who I'm pretty sure he's never even got his fucking dick touched by a woman.

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And we're all like 21.

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And hold this virgin. Right. So we go up to Lee's campground.

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Somebody has a bunch of mushrooms. Right. Nobody will do the mushrooms except for me. Right.

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So I do a shit ton of mushrooms and drink like 30 beers.

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And I'm sitting around this campfire just like spewing out my normal fucking rhetoric about the universe.

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And when we die, it all go black. What was the whole reason?

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Or, you know, I'm freaking everybody else. This girl who makes a bomb ass pasta salad, not a lot of celery in it.

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And it tastes fucking great. This is great fucking pasta salad.

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And she goes over to Chris and I can't really see her because it's dark out around the fire.

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Me and Drew are just shotgun beers. We're just trying to get so fucked up that we just puke and pass out.

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She goes over to Chris before I know it.

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She's fucking Chris in the tent. I'm like, thank God Chris losing the fucking virginity card. I love it.

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This is fantastic. So we go to bed. Me and Drew, we wind up spooning in the tent together.

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Our gay best friend Teddy's having a fucking freak out with his gay lover, Frankie.

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Why are you spooning a dude?

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Because I'm high on mushrooms, 40 degrees out. We drink 38 beers each. Sometimes things happen.

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Okay. That's not gay then.

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It wasn't gay. My dick was going to come up no matter what.

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I'm so fucking cranked out on mushrooms and beer that my dick can't even think for itself right now.

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You could put a pussy in front of him and it's like, I don't know what I would do with that right now.

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The fucking helmet's going to stay inside the foreskin.

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So we wake up in the morning. Well, I woke up in the morning to go puke.

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What do you do in the morning when you're hungover like that other than go fucking let out a fat fucking puke?

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Who's sitting on the stump by the fireplace right in front of Chris's tent smoking a cigarette other than Carly from Buffalo who sucked my fucking toes?

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I was like, Carly? You should say, yeah, that's me.

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I was like, great fucking pasta salad. Even better, man. You made me cum by sucking my fucking toes.

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I went over and went, went in the tent, walked through up and I said, bro, we got to go like right now.

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And like, so the best part of the whole story is that Chris fucked a raw and he can't remember if he pulled out or not.

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Oh, no. So we've never had contact with this girl Carly ever since.

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And this was like 2015, just probably like fucking 10 years ago. He's got a fucking kid now.

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And so we named the kid. We were like little Leroy fucking Lance is going to show up.

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And he's like, Dad, Dad, you know, the same girl sucked my fucking toes, stole my friend's virginity card and is now harboring his kid.

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Jesus Christ. So it was a 10 out of 10. You would recommend. Great fucking Valentine's Day story, you know? Yeah.

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So you would recommend the toe sucking? Well, absolutely. I mean, like, if you if you're ever curious about it, just do it.

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So I'll tell my my romance story. So I'll tell my my loss of virginity story.

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I don't know if I told this one yet, but it's pretty it's pretty funny.

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So I met this bitch on Tinder. She's a biochemical engineer.

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Fucking she is going to RPI at the time.

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And I was I went on a couple dates with her and then she took me back to you know, where the naughty pine is over in Troy.

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Now, they wouldn't leave.

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All right, I'm still here.

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Oh, wait.

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This dead air is brought to you by horse come dot com horse come.

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It's a come from a horse horse come dot com.

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So this is a Tyler show now.

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So I'll just talk about some things that only Tyler cares about.

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I had to go take a piss. Oh, I was Casey also took a piss.

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So this was just a Tyler show for a couple of seconds.

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My bladder was going to explode.

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And I was like, so as I was saying, I matched with this Asian chick on Tinder and she was going to RPI at the time.

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And she was a biochemical like engineer major or whatever.

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No surprise there. And she she had like an appointment or an apartment over by the naughty pine in Troy.

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You know where that is? Oh, yeah.

228
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One of my one of my really good friends is a barbershop that one of my best friends is a barbershop over there.

229
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:11,400
Yeah. So I she invites me over to her place and she's like one of those art hosts.

230
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:13,400
So she has like a bunch of fucking like, you know, records.

231
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:20,400
And like we we we started off the day the day we were sitting on her couch with her friend.

232
00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:22,400
Her friend was, you know, smoking weed or whatever.

233
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:28,400
And I was just chilling. And this motherfucker just goes, hey, we're going to go to my bedroom.

234
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:40,400
And I'm like, oh, boy, it's happening, isn't it? So I I want we wander into her bedroom, which was right off the living room, which was semi awkward.

235
00:17:40,400 --> 00:17:46,400
And bitch opens up fucking Disney Plus and just puts on Hercules. And we're watching that.

236
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,400
And yeah, you know, Disney's Hercules.

237
00:17:49,400 --> 00:18:01,400
The Christmas great movie. But so I'm sitting there and then she starts, you know, feeling around and I'm like, oh, OK, this is happening.

238
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:10,400
This is what's going on. And she's fucking ends up taking my fucking my cock out and then doing like the weird like condom mouth thing.

239
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:15,400
Like, you know, that one where like they like suck your dick while putting on the condom with their mouth.

240
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:20,400
No, I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah. So and this bitch does that.

241
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:24,400
It's my first time ever having a woman even near my penis.

242
00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:30,400
So she does that. I'm like, oh, fuck, don't come. Don't come. Don't come.

243
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:34,400
That's equal. Like, don't come. Don't come.

244
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,400
So then she gets her mouth off and I'm like, all right.

245
00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:44,400
And then she starts taking her clothes off. And, you know, my my little rocket ship started getting to be, you know, a bigger rocket ship at that point.

246
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:53,400
And fucking she takes her clothes off and she gets on top of me and I last all of 30 seconds.

247
00:18:53,400 --> 00:19:01,400
And I'm like, I'm good. And then I turned over to her and I go, did you did you finish to she just goes, yeah, sure.

248
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:12,400
Great. And then the fucking the reason why I bring up Hercules is because as soon as we are done having sex, that's when the song Zero to Hero started playing.

249
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:18,400
Oh, no. And she's like, you can leave now.

250
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:27,400
Like, oh, so I left and I'm like, yeah, I just had sex. I'm having this is great.

251
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,400
So I texted her the next day and I'm like, hey, you want to go out again?

252
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,400
She just goes, I don't want to talk to you ever again.

253
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:38,400
Mike. All right. Cool. I guess I'll never talk to you ever again.

254
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:43,400
The Russian girl? No, no, that was the Asian girl.

255
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:47,400
She's one of the partners, one of the fucking Asian partners.

256
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:53,400
But I was just like, what the fuck? But like, well, like when I did that, I'm like, why does she never want to talk to me again?

257
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,400
That's fucking weird. But now because you popped.

258
00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:58,400
I popped it like 30 seconds. What do you expect?

259
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:04,400
I mean, I also told her that I wasn't a virgin and that I knew what I was doing.

260
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:10,400
You know, every guy ever does. She have a sideways pussy or no?

261
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:13,400
I don't know what the fuck that's supposed to be.

262
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:18,400
That's what they say about the Asian. Like, you know, sideways.

263
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:26,400
She was Vietnamese. Oh, even better. Oppressed. I love an oppressed woman.

264
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:28,400
God bless.

265
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:34,400
Funny story about that that guy, John, great kid.

266
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:40,400
But so he ends up meeting this girl, Hannah. Right.

267
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:49,400
And I had this weird thing in college where, like, every girl I fuck came in twos.

268
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:54,400
So the first girl I fuck up there, his name was Ashley.

269
00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:59,400
And then I got in a two week long relationship with a girl named Ashley.

270
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:05,400
And then I got Carly suck my toes.

271
00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:08,400
And then I got a head from a girl named Carly.

272
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:12,400
You know, it seems like, you know, the names just came in twos.

273
00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:19,400
The best part was, though, John met this girl, Hannah, again, on a dating website, I believe.

274
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:25,400
And Turning Stone was right near and they had like a student thing on Thursday, Thursday nights or whatever.

275
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:32,400
We got like free food voucher and whatever, like gambling vouchers ship with your student ID.

276
00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:43,400
Yeah. And so we all cram. Yeah. My boy Pat, my roommate, had a what was it like a RAV4. Right.

277
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:50,400
So we cram like 10 people into this RAV4 and drive like the half an hour of Turning Stone.

278
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:57,400
And we go gamble, whatever. I'm not paying.

279
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:04,400
Well, John, I don't know if he got too drunk, but he kind of like got sloppy.

280
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:09,400
So we sit him in the front because they're scared that if not, he's going to puke.

281
00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:19,400
And me and Hannah wind up in the back where the hatches like laying together back there.

282
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:24,400
Push comes to shove. She winds up blowing me in the back of this fucking RAV4.

283
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:28,400
And then we get back to the dorm. I fuck her then.

284
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:34,400
And then she comes back two days later to hang out with John. And I fuck her again.

285
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:38,400
And John's like, dude, you got to stop stealing my girls. I'm like, Alyssa, I'm sorry, bro.

286
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:43,400
I'm sorry. Like, I'm a hound. I don't know what to do.

287
00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:49,400
The best part of the story is though, is that like, so I don't see anything from Hannah ever again.

288
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:56,400
But there's another girl, Hannah. Right. So we're getting ready to throw a little party in my dorm.

289
00:22:56,400 --> 00:23:03,400
And there's this girl, Gabby. She looks like a horse. Right. She got like a horse face on her.

290
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:08,400
That's the best.

291
00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:12,400
One of my best friends throughout childhood, Adam, he breaks up with his girlfriend.

292
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:18,400
He's all heartbroken and shit. Right. And I say, hey, listen, we're throwing a little party in the dorm.

293
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:22,400
We got a bunch of beer. We got some vodka. Like come up for the weekend or whatever.

294
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:27,400
He's like, all right. Dude, this guy's handsome. Right.

295
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:36,400
He's chiseled, bro. He looks like a fucking Greek Greek sculpture. Fucking six pack muscles. Beautiful guy. Right.

296
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:44,400
And so me and Pat are like, you know what we're going to do? We're going to keep sending Pat or fucking Gabby pictures of him with a shirt off.

297
00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:51,400
You're catfishing her. It'd be like he wants to fuck you. You know, like when he gets up here, fuck him.

298
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:56,400
And so we've probably sent her like fucking 12 pictures of him with a shirt on.

299
00:23:56,400 --> 00:24:00,400
Fucking pussy's vibrating at this point. Oh, she is soaking wet.

300
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:07,400
So when he gets up there, first thing I do is make him like a triple shot fucking vodka drink, get him hot and bothered.

301
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:11,400
And so we run out of mixer and the only thing we got left is fucking Mountain Dew.

302
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:17,400
So I'm feeding them fucking vodka and Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew is fucking delicious.

303
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:24,400
Drink vodka and double vodka and Mountain Dews. And he gets so drunk, he winds up like throwing up in the bathroom.

304
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:30,400
I'm like, all right, buddy, you'll be all right. You know, when you get done, we're going to be down in a common area hanging out.

305
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:33,400
Me and the boys just come down. He's like, all right.

306
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:42,400
There's four reasons. Like dorm building. And on the first floor is like the common area with like four couches, whatever and TV.

307
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:47,400
And then upstairs is like our quad with the other four quads.

308
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:53,400
Well, the girl quad that we usually hang out with is on the second floor too, but it's across the hallway.

309
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:57,400
So we're not paying any attention. We're down there just drinking beer, watch TV.

310
00:24:57,400 --> 00:25:03,400
I think we're playing cards, shooting the shit. And I'm like, hey, Pat, have you seen Adam?

311
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:06,400
He's like, he was thrown up in the bathroom. That's all I knew.

312
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:10,400
And I'm like, well, like I haven't seen him in a couple hours. I checked on him.

313
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:15,400
Like, should we probably go check on him? So we go in the bathroom. He's just not there.

314
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:22,400
What's going on here? Now, like a good friend, which I'm not, would go searching for him.

315
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:29,400
Right. Well, there's this. There's what?

316
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:35,400
Nope. I don't know what happened. My fucking monitor just fucking pop went off.

317
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:40,400
I'm still here though. Right. Yeah. Yeah.

318
00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:43,400
I don't know what happened. My monitor just fucking shut off.

319
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:52,400
But so fucking where was I? Oh yeah.

320
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:58,400
So there's this girl, Hannah, who just like broke up with her boyfriend or whatever at the time.

321
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:03,400
Was hanging out with one of the like friends group of girls.

322
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:09,400
And she's like, yeah, I broke up with my boyfriend today.

323
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:13,400
But earlier that day I convinced her to stay for the party.

324
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:23,400
So I get her off my room and I'm trying to fornicate with her or whatever.

325
00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:28,400
It kind of turns into her crying because she misses her boyfriend. Oh no.

326
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:33,400
Well, you can still fuck me if you're crying. Well, it's pretty much how I was going.

327
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:44,400
I'll make you feel even better. So like an hour and a half goes by to find out like, all right, I'm not banging her.

328
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:50,400
You know, it's not happening. So I'm like, you know what I should do is go find my buddy Adam.

329
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:55,400
Three and a half hours. I haven't seen him yet. Where is he?

330
00:26:55,400 --> 00:27:03,400
So I move on from this girl and I go fucking searching for Adam.

331
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:08,400
Now all the boys are down in the common area. Still drinking, still smoking.

332
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:12,400
Hey, where's Adam? They go, I don't know. I don't know where he is.

333
00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:17,400
Now I got a raging boner. I'm like, all right, let's find him.

334
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:20,400
All in the bathrooms. He's not in any of the bathrooms.

335
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:28,400
And then we go in the Gabby's room, open the door up. She's butt naked. Right.

336
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:33,400
Butt naked on top of him, just sucking on his neck.

337
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:41,400
And I just need you to imagine this girl who's like, not that big, but she's not that small on top of him, sucking his neck.

338
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:50,400
And he pops his head out to the side and goes, help me.

339
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:55,400
And so we break all that up and everything.

340
00:27:55,400 --> 00:28:01,400
And I finally get he falls asleep next to the girl that I was trying to bang in my bed.

341
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:08,400
I fall asleep in the couch in the common area. Wake up in the morning to this girl, Hannah, waking me up going, I got to go home.

342
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:13,400
I'm like, fuck me. I've always slept for like an hour and a half.

343
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:19,400
So, you know, that's, you know, well, the Smashing Pumpkins, you know, that song like what, 1974?

344
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:25,400
Yeah. Or whatever it is. It was like, we don't need things.

345
00:28:25,400 --> 00:28:28,400
Yeah. Checked out in 1979. Yeah.

346
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:36,400
That song always brings up fucking this memory because I'm driving her in my old shit box fucking Ford Ranger.

347
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:45,400
That song's playing. I bring her up to the house and her boyfriend's standing outside in the front of the front door.

348
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:51,400
Wait for his arms crossed. Like a disappointed dad. Yeah. Exactly.

349
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:55,400
She looks at me and she was like, thanks for the drinks.

350
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:58,400
Gives me a little peck on the cheek and it like leaves.

351
00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:08,400
Obviously go fucking argue with this guy and in the whole ride home, it was like, and we.

352
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:14,400
I'm like, every time I hear the song, it brings me back at that time.

353
00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:20,400
I was like, what are you doing with your life, Kyle? What? What exactly are you doing?

354
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:25,400
I just like how you got a raging heart on and went looking for a guy.

355
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:33,400
I'll park like, what do they call it? This is your friend finder.

356
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:38,400
Yeah. But butters. Butters creamy goo.

357
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:41,400
It's like, this is your friend finder.

358
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:44,400
You're fucking. Well, what happens when it points straight up?

359
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:49,400
That means that you have a friend in Jesus.

360
00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:55,400
Dude, so I got I got my my worst Tinder date experience was fucking hysterical.

361
00:29:55,400 --> 00:30:06,400
So I met with I matched with this cute blonde girl and we decided to go to a restaurant and then we were going to go see a movie afterwards.

362
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:11,400
So I'm like, all right, whatever. So we get there. I meet her up. I meet up with her.

363
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:15,400
We have a conversation and we go out to eat and Mike. All right.

364
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:19,400
We're done eating. I'm like, all right, let's go. Let's go. Let's go see the movie.

365
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:25,400
And she gets a phone call and I'm like, oh, this is the help me phone call type thing being like, yep.

366
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,400
Yeah, I'm good. Or the yeah, we got to I got to go.

367
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:33,400
There's something that came up and she turns over to me and she goes, I got to go.

368
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:40,400
My my my sister's having her baby. And I go, what the fuck did you say?

369
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:48,400
She goes, I really got to go. My sister's literally having a baby right now. I'm like, listen, if you're if you just don't want to continue to date, you can just tell me that.

370
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:52,400
And she's like, no, no, seriously, my girl, my sister's having her baby.

371
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:57,400
And I'm like, all right, I'll go see the movie again. Go go do that.

372
00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:02,400
I'm like, she had like real like horse girl teeth to like the fucking like super gummy teeth.

373
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:05,400
And I'm like, you kind of catfished me with that anyway.

374
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:10,400
So fuck you, bitch. So she fucking leaves and I'm like, whatever, I'm in the movie.

375
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:17,400
And then I get a Snapchat message from her and it's literally her in the hospital with her sister like holding her hand like with like the time stamp.

376
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,400
I'm like, oh, the bitch wasn't lying to me.

377
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:24,400
I'm like, hey, you know, now you don't have to, you know, be there for your sister.

378
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:27,400
A couple of days later, I text her and she I'm like, not you.

379
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:31,400
I'm going to do that. She's just like, nah, you seem like kind of a dick.

380
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:35,400
I don't really like you that much. You bitch.

381
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:40,400
I like I wasn't like, yeah, let's I don't care about your sister having a baby.

382
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:43,400
Fuck you. I'm like, so you want to go on a date again?

383
00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:47,400
She's like, nah, you're you seem like a real asshole and you're a real angry person.

384
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,400
I can't have that kind of vibes in my in my life.

385
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:54,400
And I go, how would you go fucking horse, dude? Go home and fuck your horse bitch.

386
00:31:54,400 --> 00:32:01,400
Not wrong. Fuck you and your sister. Fuck you and your shitty nephew.

387
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:09,400
So so Casey, what's a good that's a good love story that you got that because we've been me and Kate Kyle and Sharon.

388
00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:16,400
What's a good love story for you? Not a very long one, but I guess it.

389
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:19,400
I think Dan's here. Dan's here like the first Kyle.

390
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:25,400
You still there? Hey, Kyle, the fall asleep.

391
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:28,400
Oh shit. No, no, no. I had my mic on mute.

392
00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:35,400
Oh, I've tried. There was like a big arc and then like now my one monitor is not working.

393
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:37,400
Oh, that's fun. Yeah.

394
00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:40,400
There was like a big flash of electricity. Weird.

395
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:45,400
So Casey, I don't know what the fuck happened. So Casey, continue.

396
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:58,400
Yeah. So like the first time before I lost my virginity, I brought my ex on like this trip with my family to my sister's dancing competition.

397
00:32:58,400 --> 00:33:00,400
Where was that? In Connecticut.

398
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:04,400
And so we fucking stayed in a hotel together.

399
00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:09,400
And, you know, my parents, my sister left to go to the fucking dance practice.

400
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:15,400
I'm sort of like, oh, we're going to have sex. We're going to have sex now.

401
00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:20,400
So like I was so nervous. I fucking couldn't get hard.

402
00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:25,400
So I'm just like, I'm trying to get hard for like a solid fucking half hour.

403
00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:29,400
Okay. You're like punching your dick.

404
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:41,400
Like this is not working. So like, okay, let's give up. And then literally the second I put my pants on, my parents walked to the door.

405
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:45,400
So that was just fate, but not a very, not a very long story.

406
00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:50,400
That is incredible luck. Hey, I don't think Kyle's heard the library story.

407
00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:53,400
I'd love for you to say that again. Oh, Jesus Christ.

408
00:33:53,400 --> 00:34:05,400
Did you fucking a library? No, even worse. No, I was fucking, you know, I have this job where you have to like put all the books back and like stock shit in the library.

409
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:16,400
So they said they my boss said one day you got to go upstairs and sort these magazines like these old fucking magazines from the 90s and shit.

410
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:26,400
And so I was up there fucking sorting magazines, sitting in the fucking little attic there and like I'm getting bored.

411
00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:32,400
And you know, when you're like, you know, you get so bored, your fucking dick starts to get hard.

412
00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:38,400
Yeah. Yeah. So I'm like, let me just fucking rub one out right here.

413
00:34:38,400 --> 00:34:47,400
I'm fucking looking at that fucking People magazine 2002. Let me just like fucking blow load right here.

414
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:52,400
I don't remember. I'm Obama.

415
00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:56,400
I was before you checked off the big mic.

416
00:34:56,400 --> 00:34:59,400
It was before Michelle Obama.

417
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:11,400
But yeah, I'm just like, fucking let me like finish off in this People magazine real quick.

418
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:15,400
And yeah, I went back to work. Nobody saw me.

419
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:25,400
What for you, bro? Dude, my mom used to get the Victoria Secret like catalogs like sent to her and I would always steal them when I was fucking 12 years old.

420
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:33,400
First time, first time I got caught jerking off was remember some of the school fundraisers, they would do the magazines or whatever.

421
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:45,400
Yeah. Like magazine subscriptions. Yeah. So I got I remember my parents got me like a Sports Illustrated for kids or the real Sports Illustrated.

422
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:48,400
The regular one. Yeah, the regular one.

423
00:35:48,400 --> 00:36:03,400
And so the swimsuit. Yeah. Well, that's exactly what was the swimsuit model. And so I'm in my like bedroom with swimsuit model looking at it with my deck out.

424
00:36:03,400 --> 00:36:06,400
And like, obviously, I hadn't come yet.

425
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:11,400
Like in my life. So I'm just sitting there just playing with it. Like, this feels pretty good.

426
00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:14,400
Was this the Kate Upton cover?

427
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:19,400
I don't know. As I'm looking at the swimsuit model, right.

428
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:26,400
And it's like fucking seven o'clock in the morning. My fucking drunk parents usually up that early.

429
00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:32,400
And the most of my mom comes in the room and I like hide the magazine.

430
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,400
I had a blanket over my wiener.

431
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:38,400
You know, I didn't see that was out by hide the magazine.

432
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:44,400
She's like, it's OK, Kyle, you can look at that magazine.

433
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:46,400
It's yours. It's yours.

434
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:50,400
I was like, I was just just seeing if that that article.

435
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:53,400
Well, Brad James is in there.

436
00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,400
Swimsuit part, Ma.

437
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:59,400
It's OK. It's OK. I'll leave you alone.

438
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:04,400
They got the New York Rangers in here and we're seeing who the draft next.

439
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:08,400
Ten years old, I'm trying to hide that I'm jerking off.

440
00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:11,400
My idea that that's what I'm doing.

441
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:15,400
I'm just playing with myself.

442
00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:20,400
My favorite caught jerking off story was I was I was in my room.

443
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:26,400
I was jerking off. I had I was watching porn on my phone with the sound off because that's what I normally do.

444
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:32,400
I still do that to this day. I don't know why I like sound off porn because I just think some women.

445
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:36,400
I just think some women make weird sounds, so it just it turns me off.

446
00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:41,400
Anyways, but I was I was I was in there.

447
00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:43,400
I had I was watching.

448
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:46,400
Oh, it is a damn, dude.

449
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:48,400
What? I am Daniel.

450
00:37:48,400 --> 00:37:50,400
Welcome to the podcast.

451
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:51,400
Hello, Dan. Welcome.

452
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:53,400
The fuck is up?

453
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:55,400
Kyle's here. Oh, hey.

454
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:57,400
Oh, fucking Christ.

455
00:37:57,400 --> 00:37:59,400
No, we're good. We're good.

456
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:08,400
All right. So I was I was sitting there and I was I was looking at some some some nice lesbian porn on my phone.

457
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:13,400
And I fucking my dad never knocked on the door ever.

458
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:16,400
My dad would just barge into my room without knocking ever.

459
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:20,400
But I could tell when he was coming because, you know, he was paralyzed.

460
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:23,400
So like you could kind of hear when your dad was coming.

461
00:38:23,400 --> 00:38:27,400
I know that's what I got.

462
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:34,400
But you can hear mom and dad are having sex because dad's about the pop is fucking low.

463
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:37,400
So I was doing that and I'm like, all right.

464
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:42,400
And then for whatever reason, my dad was real quiet coming up on me this time.

465
00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:49,400
And then the door just opens and Mike, like there was no time to like pull the pull the plate gets up or anything.

466
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:53,400
It was just straight up. My cocks out fucking phone in my hand.

467
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:58,400
And my dad just goes, oh, fuck.

468
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:02,400
Yep. Cool.

469
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:04,400
Yep. And then just closes the door.

470
00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:12,400
And then, like, you know, three hours later, I come down the stairs and he's like watching like football on the TV or something.

471
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,400
And I just go, are you want to talk about this?

472
00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:20,400
He goes, no, I never want to talk about this ever again.

473
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,400
You brought it up to him.

474
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:30,400
Yeah, I really wanted like the awkwardness to be done like outright like I so I just was like, do you want to talk about this?

475
00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:33,400
He's like no, I'm never talking about this with you again.

476
00:39:33,400 --> 00:39:37,400
We got a bad echo.

477
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:40,400
We'll stop real quick and I swallow away.

478
00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:47,400
I yeah, we're back, we're back and then I got I got one more of these stories.

479
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:52,400
You want to talk about this?

480
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:55,400
You saw it.

481
00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:58,400
It's the fucking yay Valentine's Day special.

482
00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,400
Yeah, you ever got a foot job?

483
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,400
No, I have.

484
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:05,400
That's that's one thing I haven't.

485
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:12,400
Well, if you go back and listen to the beginning of this podcast, he actually told a story that made me want to jump off the Pratoon Island bridge.

486
00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:18,400
Some toenails on her.

487
00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:24,400
And they got softened up.

488
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,400
Damn.

489
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:30,400
And her fucking slut mouth.

490
00:40:30,400 --> 00:40:32,400
Damn.

491
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:33,400
Wow.

492
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:38,400
She then sucked the virginity card out of one of my best friends fucking five years later.

493
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:39,400
Who was this?

494
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:40,400
Do we know her?

495
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:42,400
No, we don't.

496
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:43,400
Carly from Buffalo.

497
00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:46,400
I have no idea what her last name is.

498
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:52,400
She makes a great pasta salad and there's not too much celery in it.

499
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:55,400
Great pasta salad, great foot job.

500
00:40:55,400 --> 00:41:01,400
But still my favorite dad story or one of my favorite dad stories is when he gave me the talk.

501
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:05,400
Do you guys ever have like an awkward talk story?

502
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:16,400
Because I told my parents just pretended like so I didn't realize that when you go to like you know how you have a pediatrician.

503
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:21,400
Yeah, go to the pediatrician like until you're like what's the age like 17?

504
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:27,400
No, it's like you can go to a pediatrician until you're like 21 21.

505
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:37,400
Alright, 21. So I remember after like my third fucking shot for possible STDs or whatever.

506
00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:44,400
My ma called me because I didn't realize she was getting the insurance bill or whatever.

507
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:48,400
And she's like, Kyle, do we have to have a talk?

508
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:53,400
I was like, about what ma?

509
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:55,400
You dropped out. Hold on.

510
00:41:55,400 --> 00:42:00,400
You back? I'm not going. I was like, I'm not going to doctors.

511
00:42:00,400 --> 00:42:03,400
What are these fucking four bills I have?

512
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:16,400
And I was like, I was like, I think I'm probably UTIs ma.

513
00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:26,400
She goes, start wearing fucking condoms because I swear to God, if you give me a grandchild before you figure out how to pay your fucking college debt off, I'll kill you.

514
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:35,400
Okay. So my story was my dad caught me with a Maxim magazine when I was, I think, 11 years old.

515
00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:41,400
And he just goes, we're going to have a conversation about this and you're not going to like it.

516
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:47,400
And I'm like, you caught you looking at fucking and Frank.

517
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:55,400
I will tell you if Frank made it to 18 years old.

518
00:42:55,400 --> 00:43:00,400
I'm actually, I'm wearing this off of her 14 year old pictures.

519
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:03,400
She's got that.

520
00:43:03,400 --> 00:43:07,400
You're telling me I'm wearing a t shirt with and Frank on it right now.

521
00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:15,400
14 year old damn wouldn't fuck 14 year old fucking Frank.

522
00:43:15,400 --> 00:43:19,400
I mean, when I was 14, it's different. You can't.

523
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:22,400
I would.

524
00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:25,400
Right. I would. You're 14 years old. Dan, are you going to fuck it?

525
00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:27,400
Frank? I don't think you can. Frank made it to 14.

526
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:33,400
She did make it to 14. She died when she was 15. Yeah. 14 14 year old me would do it.

527
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:38,400
There you go. She was, dude, in her fucking diary, she was horny as shit.

528
00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:44,400
Oh my God. Yeah. If you actually read that, dude, she was fucking horny as shit.

529
00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:48,400
She kept on talking about like how she was excited to get her period and shit.

530
00:43:48,400 --> 00:44:00,400
And then how fucking like the dude that she was hiding with, like from the other family, like how she like it made her like a downstairs region feel like she said some real wild shit in there.

531
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:06,400
She absolutely had a bush though. You know that for sure.

532
00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:11,400
Yeah, because she was fucking hidden in the attic. I don't think they had fucking razors up there.

533
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:16,400
Okay. Oh, 14 year old Kyle would probably still go down.

534
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:23,400
Okay. That's enough. I'll try to tap back to when I was 14 years old.

535
00:44:23,400 --> 00:44:31,400
I don't want to think about it when I'm 34. I'm a cocksucker, really? What's that?

536
00:44:31,400 --> 00:44:37,400
Now all of a sudden I'm the cocksucker. No, no, no, no, no. Really? Really? No.

537
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:42,400
I just don't want to go spend time in jail with our friend now. Now Dan's the fucking friend and proper one.

538
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:46,400
This podcast says, sail the new uncharted waters.

539
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:49,400
Fucking fascist Dan. No, no, no.

540
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:53,400
Is it because she's Jewish? Is that why you don't like her?

541
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:56,400
Because she's a fucking J. Dan, because she's a fucking J. Really?

542
00:44:56,400 --> 00:44:59,400
Yeah, bro. Aren't you a fucking Zionist, bro?

543
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:03,400
What's your fucking issue, Dan? What the fuck is your issue?

544
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,400
What's my issue? Yeah.

545
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:07,400
I don't know. Dan's fucking one.

546
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:10,400
All right, Dan. All right, Dan. Would you fuck Ben Shapiro's sister?

547
00:45:10,400 --> 00:45:12,400
Yes. Yes. Of course.

548
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:15,400
Yeah, absolutely. Those massive fucking titties.

549
00:45:15,400 --> 00:45:21,400
Like I said earlier, listeners, if you've got big fucking cans, I'm coming for you.

550
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:23,400
Please.

551
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:29,400
All right, all right, all right, Kyle. This is the best, this is the biggest question. Tits or ass?

552
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:39,400
As an early lad, all the way up until probably about five years ago, I was all about titties.

553
00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:48,400
Big fat titties, right? But then as I started hanging out with more of the African-American crowd,

554
00:45:48,400 --> 00:45:53,400
I began to develop a strong interest in fat asses.

555
00:45:53,400 --> 00:45:59,400
So if you had to choose now currently, tits, tits still.

556
00:45:59,400 --> 00:46:02,400
What am I going to do with an ass? What am I going to do with an ass?

557
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:04,400
Fuck it. I don't know.

558
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:08,400
I can fuck a fat ass, I can fuck a flat ass, you know?

559
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,400
It don't matter what the fuck size your ass is.

560
00:46:10,400 --> 00:46:15,400
You look like a 14-year-old little boy.

561
00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:17,400
Yeah, fuck that.

562
00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:20,400
All right, Dan, tits or ass.

563
00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:21,400
You know what?

564
00:46:21,400 --> 00:46:27,400
I have seen some ladies in my time with 14-year-old little boy titties.

565
00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:29,400
Jesus Christ.

566
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:32,400
We keep bringing it back to the 14-year-old.

567
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:35,400
I don't know what's going on here.

568
00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:38,400
I'm not a pedophile. Fuck the pedophile.

569
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:42,400
Vampires. Globalists. Globalists.

570
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:44,400
Yeah, dude, you know what?

571
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:50,400
I mean, if you see a girl that's got some giant knackers on her, but she's got no ass, it's fucking weird.

572
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:52,400
That's just like, you can't work with that.

573
00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:55,400
I mean, you always want the full package. You want big tits and big ass.

574
00:46:55,400 --> 00:46:57,400
Yes, no, but you can either have one or the other.

575
00:46:57,400 --> 00:47:00,400
You're going to have no tits, eight cups, right?

576
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:01,400
I know that, big ass.

577
00:47:01,400 --> 00:47:05,400
And a fat ass, or are you going to have a fuck, a triple D's and a flat ass.

578
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:09,400
Like a Yoko Ono ass?

579
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:10,400
Fuck Yoko Ono.

580
00:47:10,400 --> 00:47:13,400
I fucking hate Yoko Ono. I also fucking hate John Lennon.

581
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:17,400
If I could dig up his fucking grave, I could shoot him.

582
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:19,400
His ass has those fucking...

583
00:47:19,400 --> 00:47:20,400
He has like a pickle ass, dude.

584
00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:21,400
...and a scapula.

585
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:22,400
He's got like a fucking pickle ass.

586
00:47:22,400 --> 00:47:26,400
The only good thing John Lennon did was imagine, and that's it.

587
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:31,400
Other than that, the rest of the Beatles did all the fucking work.

588
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:33,400
I'm pretty sure John wrote the most songs.

589
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:35,400
John was a piece of shit.

590
00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:37,400
Yeah, but John was the reason why the Beatles fell apart.

591
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:42,400
I know that Yoko Ono is an easy fucking whatever scapegoat,

592
00:47:42,400 --> 00:47:46,400
because she's one of the partners, one of the Chinese.

593
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:47,400
But...

594
00:47:47,400 --> 00:47:50,400
Also, she was ugly as shit.

595
00:47:50,400 --> 00:47:52,400
She could not sing.

596
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:56,400
Did you ever see the Johnny B. Goode thing?

597
00:47:56,400 --> 00:48:01,400
Who's that guy? Who's the black guy, the musician?

598
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:03,400
I know exactly what you're talking about.

599
00:48:03,400 --> 00:48:05,400
Yeah, I can't remember his name.

600
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:07,400
It was the Johnny B. Goode thing, right?

601
00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:10,400
Yeah, it was John Lennon, him, and Yoko Ono up there.

602
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:11,400
And they cut her mic.

603
00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:12,400
Chuck Berry?

604
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:14,400
They were singing a song, and all of a sudden she's like...

605
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:15,400
Yeah, Chuck Berry.

606
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:18,400
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

607
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:21,400
They cut her mic off, and the way he looked at her...

608
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,400
It was so fucking funny.

609
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:28,400
I will slap the fucking taste out of your mouth.

610
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:32,400
Chuck Berry was a fucking rapist, too.

611
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:34,400
They all were.

612
00:48:34,400 --> 00:48:36,400
John Lennon raped people, for sure.

613
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:38,400
Dude, they didn't have fucking cell phones.

614
00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:39,400
What else are they supposed to do?

615
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:43,400
Yeah, John Lennon was literally a domestic abuser.

616
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:45,400
Michael Jackson definitely raped kids.

617
00:48:45,400 --> 00:48:47,400
I don't know about that.

618
00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:52,400
If you were famous before the 1990s,

619
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:55,400
you absolutely have a Me Too under your fucking belt.

620
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:58,400
I think Michael Jackson raped several children.

621
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:03,400
I don't know if he raped them or if he just watched them touch themselves.

622
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:06,400
Either way, it's bad.

623
00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:12,400
I'll stand on this that I don't think MJ ever penetrated a kid.

624
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:14,400
Jesus Christ.

625
00:49:14,400 --> 00:49:17,400
He definitely was doing some shit that was illegal.

626
00:49:17,400 --> 00:49:20,400
Are you working on the description for this episode, Casey?

627
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:22,400
Yeah, this is all for real.

628
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:27,400
But you want to talk about the King of Pop being MJ, he can go fuck himself.

629
00:49:27,400 --> 00:49:30,400
Because you know who the better fucking queer was,

630
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,400
out of that whole fucking thing?

631
00:49:32,400 --> 00:49:33,400
Freddie Mercury.

632
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:34,400
It was fucking Prince.

633
00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:36,400
Oh, Freddie Mercury.

634
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:38,400
Dude, Prince...

635
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:40,400
Everybody!

636
00:49:40,400 --> 00:49:42,400
Prince wasn't even gay.

637
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:43,400
He was just metrosexual.

638
00:49:43,400 --> 00:49:46,400
Yeah, he actually liked him white gays.

639
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:48,400
Yeah, he was straight.

640
00:49:48,400 --> 00:49:50,400
Yeah, he didn't approve of it.

641
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:51,400
Really?

642
00:49:51,400 --> 00:49:52,400
Yeah.

643
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:56,400
I mean, fucking, if we're going with super gays, it's got to be Elton John.

644
00:49:56,400 --> 00:49:59,400
Elton John is the fucking gayest of the gay.

645
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:03,400
Prince loved pussy, and he got a lot of fucking pussy.

646
00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:07,400
But I'll tell you what, there was something fruity about Prince.

647
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:09,400
Yeah, but he literally said...

648
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:10,400
It's an abomination.

649
00:50:10,400 --> 00:50:14,400
Yeah, he was like, I was reading an article about it, and he was saying, he's like...

650
00:50:14,400 --> 00:50:16,400
Prince was actually a Jehovah's Witness.

651
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:17,400
Was he?

652
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:19,400
No way!

653
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:21,400
Yes, he became a Jehovah's Witness.

654
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:27,400
And he was just like, people sticking things wherever they want to stick on the stick.

655
00:50:27,400 --> 00:50:30,400
It's just gross.

656
00:50:30,400 --> 00:50:33,400
And it's like, that's wild, because he looks so gay.

657
00:50:33,400 --> 00:50:34,400
Oh yeah.

658
00:50:34,400 --> 00:50:37,400
He looks like the gayest person you could ever find, but like,

659
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:40,400
he was crushing pussy left and right.

660
00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:42,400
Yeah, wasn't he fucking Madonna for a while?

661
00:50:42,400 --> 00:50:44,400
Everyone was fucking Madonna.

662
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:45,400
Two boxers fucking Madonna.

663
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:47,400
No, but Prince was the Madonna fucker.

664
00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:51,400
I don't know, but it seems like a lot of gay people, if they're so in the closet,

665
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:54,400
that they're basically lying to themselves that they're gay,

666
00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:58,400
act like they fucking hate other gay people.

667
00:50:58,400 --> 00:51:00,400
Yeah.

668
00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:07,400
Look at what Prince did on his... when he got like, whatever...

669
00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:08,400
What's the word I'm looking for here?

670
00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:11,400
He got inducted into the Hall of Fame, Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?

671
00:51:11,400 --> 00:51:13,400
Yeah, he sucked off Steven Tyler right on the stage.

672
00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:15,400
I saw it. It was crazy.

673
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:16,400
What?

674
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:22,400
No, oh my God, do not, do not be ashamed, Prince, of what he did on that stage.

675
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:25,400
Because George Morrison died, is that his name?

676
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:26,400
John Morrison?

677
00:51:26,400 --> 00:51:27,400
John Morrison.

678
00:51:27,400 --> 00:51:28,400
No, it wasn't John...

679
00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:29,400
No, what the fuck was his name?

680
00:51:29,400 --> 00:51:30,400
George Harrison.

681
00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:31,400
Yeah, George Harrison.

682
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:32,400
George Harrison has passed away.

683
00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:36,400
And you know his song, While My Guitar Gently Weeps?

684
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:39,400
Yeah, I saw his solo on that song.

685
00:51:39,400 --> 00:51:40,400
Yeah, that was fucking awesome.

686
00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:45,400
Yeah, it was like him, Tom Petty, Dolly Morrison, fuck, dude.

687
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:51,400
His solo, and then he just tosses the guitar into the crowd and like flips off the Rolling Stone people.

688
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,400
You know the whole premise behind that, right, Casey?

689
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:54,400
No.

690
00:51:54,400 --> 00:52:03,400
So the year before that come out, you know how Rolling Stone does like the top 50 guitarists of all time or whatever?

691
00:52:03,400 --> 00:52:04,400
Yeah.

692
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:11,400
So they didn't put Prince into the top 50 guitarists, and he got inducted into the Hall of Fame.

693
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:18,400
So they asked him to whatever, like perform on that song.

694
00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:23,400
And he never showed up for any of the rehearsals, none of it.

695
00:52:23,400 --> 00:52:26,400
He just put a fill in on the rehearsals, blah, blah, blah.

696
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:30,400
He showed up and told Tom Petty, he's like, hey, I just got into the Hall of Fame.

697
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:32,400
These guys just fucked me over.

698
00:52:32,400 --> 00:52:35,400
Rolling Stone, they're all going to be here.

699
00:52:35,400 --> 00:52:37,400
I want to flip them the bird.

700
00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:42,400
So Tom's like, all right, just look at me and I'll let you know when to stop.

701
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:46,400
And he just starts shredding and shredding and shredding.

702
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:52,400
And you'll like, if you watch that video, he keeps looking at fucking Tom Petty and he just like gives him a nod and goes, yeah, keep going.

703
00:52:52,400 --> 00:52:53,400
Keep going.

704
00:52:53,400 --> 00:52:55,400
And he just kills it.

705
00:52:55,400 --> 00:53:01,400
And eventually, yeah, he takes the guitar off and he throws it at the Rolling Stone people as like a big middle finger.

706
00:53:01,400 --> 00:53:04,400
Like, you don't think I'm one of the top 50 guitarists?

707
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:05,400
Yeah, that's fucking awesome.

708
00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:07,400
That solo was amazing.

709
00:53:07,400 --> 00:53:08,400
Why was he looking?

710
00:53:08,400 --> 00:53:13,400
Why was Tom Petty up to the side when he stops?

711
00:53:13,400 --> 00:53:15,400
Well, it's Tom Petty, bro.

712
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:16,400
Yeah.

713
00:53:16,400 --> 00:53:17,400
You know, I mean, like, let's.

714
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:20,400
I just like fucking let him shred as long as he wants.

715
00:53:20,400 --> 00:53:26,400
Well, like, I think it was like a respect thing because obviously, like George Harrison, it just passed away.

716
00:53:26,400 --> 00:53:35,400
Right. And it was supposed to be like a like memorial to him and like.

717
00:53:35,400 --> 00:53:37,400
Acoustic and shit like that.

718
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:45,400
But there's a really if you look, Darlene, I think his name is Darlene Harrison and.

719
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:53,400
Fucking Prince both like make eye contact and George Harrison's son is just like just shred, just shred.

720
00:53:53,400 --> 00:53:56,400
He just gives him that little nod, like just get after it.

721
00:53:56,400 --> 00:54:00,400
And he just goes wild, wild on the guitar.

722
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:01,400
That was fucking amazing.

723
00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:07,400
Still not as cool as fucking Jimi Hendrix fucking Star Spangled Banner at Woodstock.

724
00:54:07,400 --> 00:54:08,400
That was sick.

725
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:09,400
The best.

726
00:54:09,400 --> 00:54:11,400
I have that on record, bro.

727
00:54:11,400 --> 00:54:12,400
That's fucking sick.

728
00:54:12,400 --> 00:54:14,400
I have that on vinyl, that Woodstock.

729
00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:16,400
People back then were like, this sucks.

730
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:19,400
They're like, get him off the stage.

731
00:54:19,400 --> 00:54:21,400
He's black.

732
00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:26,400
Meanwhile, Jimmy's just up there like, don't give a fuck.

733
00:54:26,400 --> 00:54:29,400
I'm the best guitar she ever going to hear.

734
00:54:29,400 --> 00:54:33,400
So, Kyle, what do you what do you play guitar, bass?

735
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:39,400
I guess, well, the best instrument I have is the voice, right?

736
00:54:39,400 --> 00:54:44,400
I'm singing or whatever, but I can't play like pretty decent rhythm guitar.

737
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:47,400
I can play bass really well.

738
00:54:47,400 --> 00:54:49,400
I'm OK on the keyboard.

739
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:50,400
Nice.

740
00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:54,400
Got a little ukulele behind me.

741
00:54:54,400 --> 00:55:00,400
We got a band of about seven people that never show up to practice.

742
00:55:00,400 --> 00:55:03,400
So I'll play a Trabone if you got one.

743
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:04,400
I could play.

744
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:05,400
I don't know.

745
00:55:05,400 --> 00:55:06,400
No.

746
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:08,400
You play some ska.

747
00:55:08,400 --> 00:55:09,400
Yeah, I do.

748
00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:11,400
That's what I'm getting after with the ska.

749
00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,400
Let's start a one man band.

750
00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:19,400
Nobody like that's the issue with bands is like I got into all these bands and we start

751
00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:22,400
writing music and then people just stop showing up.

752
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:23,400
Yeah.

753
00:55:23,400 --> 00:55:28,400
So, Dan, do you have a romance story for our Valentine's Day special?

754
00:55:28,400 --> 00:55:32,400
Because we've told ours a romance story or a sex story.

755
00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:37,400
Either way, I'll tell you a romance Casey jerked off into a magazine.

756
00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:43,400
Oh, so often she took my virginity card like it make it good.

757
00:55:43,400 --> 00:55:44,400
Oh, man.

758
00:55:44,400 --> 00:55:45,400
I see.

759
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:47,400
I want to be respectful.

760
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:49,400
No, no names.

761
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:52,400
So I used to date this girl from Pennsylvania.

762
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:55,400
I should tell it, dude.

763
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:56,400
It's awesome.

764
00:55:56,400 --> 00:55:58,400
Oh, God.

765
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:01,400
So how do I keep this respectful?

766
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:06,400
So anyway, yeah, I'm trying to think because my girlfriend, this is this possible.

767
00:56:06,400 --> 00:56:08,400
My girlfriend listens to this podcast.

768
00:56:08,400 --> 00:56:13,400
I don't want to, you know, yeah, maybe I'll, I don't know.

769
00:56:13,400 --> 00:56:14,400
You got it.

770
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:15,400
Dan, you got it.

771
00:56:15,400 --> 00:56:17,400
Did you tell a story, Tyler?

772
00:56:17,400 --> 00:56:18,400
Oh, yeah.

773
00:56:18,400 --> 00:56:20,400
We all does your girlfriend listen to this podcast?

774
00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:21,400
Sometimes.

775
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:22,400
Yeah.

776
00:56:22,400 --> 00:56:23,400
No, she doesn't.

777
00:56:23,400 --> 00:56:24,400
No, she doesn't.

778
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:25,400
Okay.

779
00:56:25,400 --> 00:56:26,400
Well, that's why you get away with it.

780
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:27,400
Casey, did you tell a story?

781
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:28,400
Yeah.

782
00:56:28,400 --> 00:56:30,400
Does your girlfriend listen to this podcast?

783
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:31,400
Sometimes.

784
00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:32,400
Okay.

785
00:56:32,400 --> 00:56:36,640
So you're talking about how he couldn't get hard because they're in like, he had an alone

786
00:56:36,640 --> 00:56:40,600
time with his, with his girlfriend during college or during a, what was it?

787
00:56:40,600 --> 00:56:41,600
High school you said?

788
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:42,600
Yeah.

789
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:43,600
High school.

790
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:44,600
Yeah.

791
00:56:44,600 --> 00:56:45,600
And then he couldn't get hard.

792
00:56:45,600 --> 00:56:47,000
So, and then he is like, well, we're not going to do it.

793
00:56:47,000 --> 00:56:50,400
And as soon as he pulled his pants up, his parents walked in the room.

794
00:56:50,400 --> 00:56:53,400
How long was she going at it?

795
00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:55,400
Like, like a half hour or some shit.

796
00:56:55,400 --> 00:56:56,400
Trying to get it hard.

797
00:56:56,400 --> 00:56:57,400
Yeah.

798
00:56:57,400 --> 00:56:58,400
Damn.

799
00:56:58,400 --> 00:56:59,400
You were nervous, huh?

800
00:56:59,400 --> 00:57:00,400
I was nervous.

801
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:03,400
I was a fucking, you know, shy little kid.

802
00:57:03,400 --> 00:57:04,400
I mean.

803
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:05,400
Little kid.

804
00:57:05,400 --> 00:57:06,400
I thought this was in college.

805
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:07,400
No, this was six.

806
00:57:07,400 --> 00:57:08,400
I was 16.

807
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:09,400
Oh, 16.

808
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:10,400
Yeah.

809
00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:11,400
How old was she?

810
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:12,400
17.

811
00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:13,400
Okay.

812
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:14,400
Ah, you're going out to the older women.

813
00:57:14,400 --> 00:57:15,400
Man.

814
00:57:15,400 --> 00:57:22,400
Oh, I want to say something funny, but I don't want it permanently on the record.

815
00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:25,400
There's so many things I can say right now.

816
00:57:25,400 --> 00:57:26,400
It's fine.

817
00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:27,400
I'll just, just put like a trigger warning right here.

818
00:57:27,400 --> 00:57:31,400
And then when your girlfriend listens to us, just shut it off.

819
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:34,400
Trigger warning, trigger warning.

820
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:37,400
Dan's going to say a funny ass story.

821
00:57:37,400 --> 00:57:41,400
You know, cause she's going to, now she's going to be like, what did you want to say?

822
00:57:41,400 --> 00:57:42,400
Daniel?

823
00:57:42,400 --> 00:57:43,400
Oh yeah.

824
00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:44,400
I mean, she already knows.

825
00:57:44,400 --> 00:57:49,600
I just, every time, every time we pass something that happened in a car wash, I'm always just

826
00:57:49,600 --> 00:57:52,400
like, Oh, I got my dick sucked in a car wash.

827
00:57:52,400 --> 00:57:53,400
Did you?

828
00:57:53,400 --> 00:57:54,400
Yeah.

829
00:57:54,400 --> 00:57:55,400
Tell us about it.

830
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:59,400
You're telling stories I don't want to tell any other people.

831
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:03,400
I think, I think, uh, Daniel fucking Dan had a good story.

832
00:58:03,400 --> 00:58:06,400
Kyle, you seem like you've gotten your dick sucked in a car wash.

833
00:58:06,400 --> 00:58:13,400
I, uh, in a car wash, I've always been too poor to actually go to a car wash.

834
00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:19,400
I have to have my dick sucked in some weird fucking spot.

835
00:58:19,400 --> 00:58:22,400
I got my dick sucked behind a dumpster at a party once.

836
00:58:22,400 --> 00:58:25,400
That's awesome.

837
00:58:25,400 --> 00:58:27,400
Did they join in?

838
00:58:27,400 --> 00:58:29,400
It was right behind Browns.

839
00:58:29,400 --> 00:58:30,400
Oh, that's a good one.

840
00:58:30,400 --> 00:58:31,400
Damn.

841
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:33,400
Was it down by the river?

842
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:34,400
Oh yeah.

843
00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:36,400
What's your body count?

844
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:37,400
My body count?

845
00:58:37,400 --> 00:58:38,400
Yeah.

846
00:58:38,400 --> 00:58:43,400
Um, probably close to a Muslim fuck.

847
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:45,400
A Muslim what?

848
00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:47,400
You dropped out.

849
00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:49,400
I think it's like.

850
00:58:49,400 --> 00:58:52,400
I blow themselves up with a suicide vest.

851
00:58:52,400 --> 00:58:53,400
Yeah.

852
00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:54,400
They get 70 virgins.

853
00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:55,400
I get 72 virgins.

854
00:58:55,400 --> 00:58:56,400
72.

855
00:58:56,400 --> 00:58:57,400
Damn.

856
00:58:57,400 --> 00:58:58,400
Wow.

857
00:58:58,400 --> 00:58:59,400
I don't know if it's close to 72.

858
00:58:59,400 --> 00:59:01,400
It's probably closer to 12.

859
00:59:01,400 --> 00:59:05,400
I got, I got, I got five, five or six, five or six.

860
00:59:05,400 --> 00:59:08,400
I have no, I'm probably Jesus Christ.

861
00:59:08,400 --> 00:59:11,400
You guys Casey, what's your body count for?

862
00:59:11,400 --> 00:59:12,400
I really.

863
00:59:12,400 --> 00:59:19,400
I got a lot of fucking.

864
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:20,400
Two.

865
00:59:20,400 --> 00:59:21,400
Two.

866
00:59:21,400 --> 00:59:22,400
Good boy.

867
00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:23,400
Fuck.

868
00:59:23,400 --> 00:59:24,400
Fucking asshole.

869
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:27,400
So what are you at there?

870
00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:28,400
I'm like five or six.

871
00:59:28,400 --> 00:59:29,400
I'd have to really think.

872
00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:30,400
Four or five, four or five.

873
00:59:30,400 --> 00:59:31,400
I think.

874
00:59:31,400 --> 00:59:32,400
Are you guys shit?

875
00:59:32,400 --> 00:59:33,400
No, dude.

876
00:59:33,400 --> 00:59:34,400
No, I, I've been.

877
00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:35,400
Five foot, five and a half.

878
00:59:35,400 --> 00:59:37,400
I've been dating the same girl.

879
00:59:37,400 --> 00:59:38,400
Just pulling tail.

880
00:59:38,400 --> 00:59:41,400
I've been in a relationship for 10 years.

881
00:59:41,400 --> 00:59:45,400
I've been in a relationship for eight years and I started that relationship when I was

882
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:46,400
18.

883
00:59:46,400 --> 00:59:49,720
I don't want to give up the real number because now I feel like, like if I counted out in

884
00:59:49,720 --> 00:59:50,720
my head.

885
00:59:50,720 --> 00:59:52,720
Yeah, but we're talking quality versus quantity.

886
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,120
Fucking fuck boy.

887
00:59:55,120 --> 00:59:56,120
Like beepers.

888
00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:58,400
Beepers probably has fucking 50 plus.

889
00:59:58,400 --> 01:00:00,800
Oh, I'm sure it's more than that.

890
01:00:00,800 --> 01:00:01,800
Look at him.

891
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:02,800
He's like a fucking.

892
01:00:02,800 --> 01:00:03,800
He's out.

893
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:04,800
He's wet dream.

894
01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:05,800
Purebred Nazi.

895
01:00:05,800 --> 01:00:10,560
Brother can eat an entire pizza and not gain a pound.

896
01:00:10,560 --> 01:00:11,560
What the fuck is with that?

897
01:00:11,560 --> 01:00:13,400
I don't know how he does that.

898
01:00:13,400 --> 01:00:14,400
Yeah.

899
01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:18,560
I think, um, if I'm not forgetting anybody, I'm probably like 28.

900
01:00:18,560 --> 01:00:19,560
All right.

901
01:00:19,560 --> 01:00:21,560
That's a good, that's a good number.

902
01:00:21,560 --> 01:00:25,640
No, now I seem like I'm a fuck.

903
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:28,040
I wish I was in the 20s.

904
01:00:28,040 --> 01:00:29,040
That's fine.

905
01:00:29,040 --> 01:00:32,040
Everybody's out here looking for love.

906
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:34,040
You fucking whore.

907
01:00:34,040 --> 01:00:36,680
Sticking it to whatever I can.

908
01:00:36,680 --> 01:00:37,680
That's awesome.

909
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:41,600
So including hookers or excluding hookers, how many?

910
01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:45,440
None of those numbers included any of the hookers.

911
01:00:45,440 --> 01:00:47,080
What about including hookers?

912
01:00:47,080 --> 01:00:48,080
How high would it be?

913
01:00:48,080 --> 01:00:53,080
Including the dead hookers.

914
01:00:53,080 --> 01:00:54,080
Those count as a half.

915
01:00:54,080 --> 01:00:57,080
None of the hookers ever died.

916
01:00:57,080 --> 01:01:01,160
So Dan, let's hear the story.

917
01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:02,160
Oh man.

918
01:01:02,160 --> 01:01:05,160
No, it wasn't even, it wasn't even that good.

919
01:01:05,160 --> 01:01:10,160
It was about throwing in a girl's ass in a car wash.

920
01:01:10,160 --> 01:01:13,160
In the front seat?

921
01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:15,160
No, it was so.

922
01:01:15,160 --> 01:01:16,160
No big deal.

923
01:01:16,160 --> 01:01:17,160
No big deal.

924
01:01:17,160 --> 01:01:23,160
It was the one next to the Scotia Mohawk station, the Glenbell station.

925
01:01:23,160 --> 01:01:29,960
So she, she, she was just heading home.

926
01:01:29,960 --> 01:01:31,560
She came here from Pennsylvania to see me.

927
01:01:31,560 --> 01:01:35,720
It was a long distance relationship and we pulled up to this red light.

928
01:01:35,720 --> 01:01:36,960
Was she a Jehovah witness too?

929
01:01:36,960 --> 01:01:38,640
No, she pulled up to this red light.

930
01:01:38,640 --> 01:01:41,600
She was behind me and, or we pulled up to the red light.

931
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:42,600
I was in front of her.

932
01:01:42,600 --> 01:01:47,000
She's behind me and she slammed into me with her car and it didn't do anything to my Jeep,

933
01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:48,800
but it fucked up her hood.

934
01:01:48,800 --> 01:01:52,720
So it was like all bent up and there's no way she's going to be able to drive it home.

935
01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:55,120
So I was like, all right, let's go to a junkyard.

936
01:01:55,120 --> 01:01:59,640
Let's see if we can find you a new hood and maybe I can spray paint it white.

937
01:01:59,640 --> 01:02:02,880
And so I'm like, where the fuck am I going to spray paint this?

938
01:02:02,880 --> 01:02:06,040
And I said, oh shit, like we can do it in the car wash.

939
01:02:06,040 --> 01:02:07,040
Yeah.

940
01:02:07,040 --> 01:02:08,040
Spray paint it right there.

941
01:02:08,040 --> 01:02:10,960
So I just hit it with some paint quick and you know, it took me like an hour to pop the

942
01:02:10,960 --> 01:02:16,840
new hood on painted and she's like, oh, how, how am I going to pay you back?

943
01:02:16,840 --> 01:02:17,840
This is awesome.

944
01:02:17,840 --> 01:02:18,840
Like, thank you so much.

945
01:02:18,840 --> 01:02:19,840
Wow.

946
01:02:19,840 --> 01:02:28,740
I can think of some things, but I, I don't want to get too descriptive of this, but off

947
01:02:28,740 --> 01:02:31,800
the air, I'll tell the full story.

948
01:02:31,800 --> 01:02:33,200
But you put it in your pooper.

949
01:02:33,200 --> 01:02:35,760
But that car wash, every time I drive by it, I'm like,

950
01:02:35,760 --> 01:02:43,160
remember when you just got fucking raped in my fucking car by van.

951
01:02:43,160 --> 01:02:45,640
Yeah, that was fucking hilarious.

952
01:02:45,640 --> 01:02:47,440
You also got raped in a car by van.

953
01:02:47,440 --> 01:02:48,440
So did I.

954
01:02:48,440 --> 01:02:49,440
Daniel did.

955
01:02:49,440 --> 01:02:50,440
No, so did I.

956
01:02:50,440 --> 01:02:53,440
Dude, it felt like it was the real experience.

957
01:02:53,440 --> 01:02:56,680
I felt like what it would actually feel like to get raped.

958
01:02:56,680 --> 01:02:57,680
I was driving.

959
01:02:57,680 --> 01:03:00,240
I was driving to medic school, him in the back seat and he just kept on trying to fucking

960
01:03:00,240 --> 01:03:01,880
touch my cock while I was driving.

961
01:03:01,880 --> 01:03:02,880
I'm like, bro, stop.

962
01:03:02,880 --> 01:03:03,880
What's wrong with that guy?

963
01:03:03,880 --> 01:03:08,880
I raped Van Patton in the Schenectady station.

964
01:03:08,880 --> 01:03:17,080
Well, this is why you cause this.

965
01:03:17,080 --> 01:03:20,400
He made the victim into the fucking into the room.

966
01:03:20,400 --> 01:03:24,880
If the cameras of state street ever worked, man, there'd be plenty of videos of me and

967
01:03:24,880 --> 01:03:28,800
Mike Kent waterboarding fucking Van Patton.

968
01:03:28,800 --> 01:03:32,160
You got to do it with gasoline.

969
01:03:32,160 --> 01:03:33,800
That's how real men do it.

970
01:03:33,800 --> 01:03:34,800
Jesus.

971
01:03:34,800 --> 01:03:36,680
Dude, I wonder what that feels like.

972
01:03:36,680 --> 01:03:39,480
You ever drink gasoline or diesel fuel?

973
01:03:39,480 --> 01:03:40,480
Never once.

974
01:03:40,480 --> 01:03:41,480
I have.

975
01:03:41,480 --> 01:03:43,200
No, really?

976
01:03:43,200 --> 01:03:44,480
It's real spicy.

977
01:03:44,480 --> 01:03:47,180
Jesus fucking Christ.

978
01:03:47,180 --> 01:03:49,840
It feels like I never drink it.

979
01:03:49,840 --> 01:03:51,120
It feels like hell.

980
01:03:51,120 --> 01:03:52,600
I've heard it causes autism.

981
01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:54,600
Yeah, I know.

982
01:03:54,600 --> 01:04:00,000
I also drank bleach before, like a shot glass of bleach because someone said I want it and

983
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:01,000
I did.

984
01:04:01,000 --> 01:04:02,000
Come on.

985
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:03,000
That fucking hurt a lot.

986
01:04:03,000 --> 01:04:04,680
That's how you fucking die.

987
01:04:04,680 --> 01:04:06,280
Dude, it hurt a lot.

988
01:04:06,280 --> 01:04:07,280
Jesus.

989
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:08,580
I never ate a Tide Pod though.

990
01:04:08,580 --> 01:04:10,120
Not that stupid.

991
01:04:10,120 --> 01:04:14,600
But yeah, other inedible objects that I've eaten.

992
01:04:14,600 --> 01:04:17,600
I've eaten full like bricks of chalk.

993
01:04:17,600 --> 01:04:18,600
Why?

994
01:04:18,600 --> 01:04:19,600
Why?

995
01:04:19,600 --> 01:04:21,540
I actually like the texture of chalk.

996
01:04:21,540 --> 01:04:25,280
Chalk actually has like a really nice feeling like when you're chewing it.

997
01:04:25,280 --> 01:04:26,400
Something wrong with that, boy.

998
01:04:26,400 --> 01:04:29,400
I think I have pica.

999
01:04:29,400 --> 01:04:34,380
But I remember the first time that I had to like as a nurse deal with a patient that had

1000
01:04:34,380 --> 01:04:38,720
something stuck up their ass.

1001
01:04:38,720 --> 01:04:40,320
So I go to like triage the patient.

1002
01:04:40,320 --> 01:04:41,560
I'm like, what's going on?

1003
01:04:41,560 --> 01:04:46,080
He's like, well, I have a dildo stuck in my ass.

1004
01:04:46,080 --> 01:04:48,440
No, dude, you know what that is?

1005
01:04:48,440 --> 01:04:49,440
He's into humiliation.

1006
01:04:49,440 --> 01:04:50,440
Yeah, right?

1007
01:04:50,440 --> 01:04:52,680
And he wants to make everybody else is fucking proud.

1008
01:04:52,680 --> 01:04:53,680
No, no, no.

1009
01:04:53,680 --> 01:04:56,960
So I'm like, all right, how big is the dildo?

1010
01:04:56,960 --> 01:05:01,080
He's like, probably like a good like eight, nine inches.

1011
01:05:01,080 --> 01:05:04,520
He's like, he's like proud of it.

1012
01:05:04,520 --> 01:05:06,720
Like he's not even like embarrassed about it.

1013
01:05:06,720 --> 01:05:07,720
It's a fucking humiliation.

1014
01:05:07,720 --> 01:05:09,720
I'm like, God damn it.

1015
01:05:09,720 --> 01:05:12,600
Why do I have to do this today?

1016
01:05:12,600 --> 01:05:13,600
Do you get it out?

1017
01:05:13,600 --> 01:05:14,600
Well, no.

1018
01:05:14,600 --> 01:05:19,720
So the doctor, you know, tried to pull it out manually and he couldn't get it.

1019
01:05:19,720 --> 01:05:23,520
So he had that surgery.

1020
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:26,320
What a joke's on him asshole.

1021
01:05:26,320 --> 01:05:32,880
Dude, so sometimes like working the job, I don't want to say it, but the job that I work

1022
01:05:32,880 --> 01:05:35,480
to see that stuff come through all the time.

1023
01:05:35,480 --> 01:05:39,480
That's how, how, how often like, is that a more common thing than people would think

1024
01:05:39,480 --> 01:05:40,480
it is?

1025
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:41,480
It happens all the time.

1026
01:05:41,480 --> 01:05:45,760
Once you like get it past a certain point, it can't come out and sucks it in rather than

1027
01:05:45,760 --> 01:05:46,760
push it.

1028
01:05:46,760 --> 01:05:49,840
So your asshole, your asshole has great suction.

1029
01:05:49,840 --> 01:05:50,840
Yeah.

1030
01:05:50,840 --> 01:05:51,840
Yeah.

1031
01:05:51,840 --> 01:05:57,680
Like very, um, like I said, one of my best friends is gay and he has to, right, right,

1032
01:05:57,680 --> 01:05:58,680
right.

1033
01:05:58,680 --> 01:05:59,680
It's my best friend.

1034
01:05:59,680 --> 01:06:00,680
That is the black one.

1035
01:06:00,680 --> 01:06:01,680
What is he black and gay?

1036
01:06:01,680 --> 01:06:06,480
I have a best friend who's got a terrible hand of cards.

1037
01:06:06,480 --> 01:06:09,480
He's black and gay.

1038
01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:13,880
He has told me that assholes can be very inviting.

1039
01:06:13,880 --> 01:06:14,880
Inviting.

1040
01:06:14,880 --> 01:06:19,040
It can be very inviting.

1041
01:06:19,040 --> 01:06:22,640
So I had, you never tried it out?

1042
01:06:22,640 --> 01:06:25,920
I've actually never, uh, butt fucked anybody.

1043
01:06:25,920 --> 01:06:26,920
Really?

1044
01:06:26,920 --> 01:06:27,920
Out of 28.

1045
01:06:27,920 --> 01:06:28,920
Yeah.

1046
01:06:28,920 --> 01:06:33,360
I, um, you ever stick a finger up someone's pooper?

1047
01:06:33,360 --> 01:06:34,360
Yes.

1048
01:06:34,360 --> 01:06:38,000
I've stuck fingers, tongues, everything you can imagine.

1049
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:39,360
Except for your penis.

1050
01:06:39,360 --> 01:06:41,840
I've never stuck the old peen up there.

1051
01:06:41,840 --> 01:06:42,840
No shit.

1052
01:06:42,840 --> 01:06:49,640
Um, I, dude, I'd rather school fuck the life out of you before I fuck your ass.

1053
01:06:49,640 --> 01:06:54,960
I I've only done anal a few times and it's not, it's, it's not the vibe I thought it

1054
01:06:54,960 --> 01:06:55,960
would be.

1055
01:06:55,960 --> 01:07:00,240
My grandfather once told me anybody that's willing to get their ass fucked is not willing

1056
01:07:00,240 --> 01:07:01,240
to be married.

1057
01:07:01,240 --> 01:07:02,240
So that's not true.

1058
01:07:02,240 --> 01:07:03,240
I've stuck.

1059
01:07:03,240 --> 01:07:04,240
Whoa.

1060
01:07:04,240 --> 01:07:05,240
All right, Daniel.

1061
01:07:05,240 --> 01:07:06,240
All right.

1062
01:07:06,240 --> 01:07:07,240
Dan's been fucked in the ass.

1063
01:07:07,240 --> 01:07:16,000
Oh my God.

1064
01:07:16,000 --> 01:07:20,560
I had this other patient who was like, you know, I got this like sore spot on my dick,

1065
01:07:20,560 --> 01:07:21,560
right?

1066
01:07:21,560 --> 01:07:22,560
And so he wanted to have the doctor.

1067
01:07:22,560 --> 01:07:27,320
Now, first of all, he fucking called the ER before he came in and said, is there a male

1068
01:07:27,320 --> 01:07:30,440
or female doctor working today?

1069
01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:34,720
And I said, oh, it's a female because usually like if you're a male and you're embarrassed

1070
01:07:34,720 --> 01:07:36,720
about something, you don't want a female doctor.

1071
01:07:36,720 --> 01:07:38,560
You want a fucking male.

1072
01:07:38,560 --> 01:07:44,480
So he comes in anyway and he's like, oh, I got a sore spot in my dick.

1073
01:07:44,480 --> 01:07:49,400
And then, so the doctor has to have like a chaperone when they go in for like, you know,

1074
01:07:49,400 --> 01:07:52,080
sexual assault cases.

1075
01:07:52,080 --> 01:07:53,480
So I go in to be the chaperone.

1076
01:07:53,480 --> 01:07:55,120
He's like, oh, this is weird.

1077
01:07:55,120 --> 01:07:57,320
I didn't know like a male was going to be in here.

1078
01:07:57,320 --> 01:08:02,440
He's like, I have to have a chaperone if I'm going to, if I'm going to do the exam.

1079
01:08:02,440 --> 01:08:13,000
And he's like, yeah, I just like want you to put some cream on my dick and rub it in.

1080
01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:17,000
And she just goes, I'll refer you to urology.

1081
01:08:17,000 --> 01:08:20,000
Walks out of the room.

1082
01:08:20,000 --> 01:08:22,760
He actually wanted somebody to jerk him off.

1083
01:08:22,760 --> 01:08:24,760
What the fuck, bro?

1084
01:08:24,760 --> 01:08:29,600
The best part about it, Casey, what you should have done as a great male nurse, you should

1085
01:08:29,600 --> 01:08:31,600
have been like, I'll do it.

1086
01:08:31,600 --> 01:08:34,600
I will gladly rub it in.

1087
01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:41,880
And then take your fucking gloved hand and put any cream on it.

1088
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:42,880
Oh geez.

1089
01:08:42,880 --> 01:08:45,680
No, this is not some kind of weird porno.

1090
01:08:45,680 --> 01:08:46,680
It's rubbery.

1091
01:08:46,680 --> 01:08:51,840
So when you fucking jerk this guy off, it just hurts.

1092
01:08:51,840 --> 01:08:56,520
Dude, dude, I, so I had something fucking going on with my dick.

1093
01:08:56,520 --> 01:09:01,520
I don't know what it was, but like the fucking, I guess we'll use medical terms here.

1094
01:09:01,520 --> 01:09:02,520
The meatus, right?

1095
01:09:02,520 --> 01:09:06,600
It was like inflamed around it.

1096
01:09:06,600 --> 01:09:09,240
Yeah, I don't know what the fuck was going on.

1097
01:09:09,240 --> 01:09:18,160
So I went to the, so I went to, what was it?

1098
01:09:18,160 --> 01:09:21,320
I think a planned parenthood because they deal with like that, that kind of stuff.

1099
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:22,320
I didn't know they did that.

1100
01:09:22,320 --> 01:09:24,120
I thought it was only like women shit.

1101
01:09:24,120 --> 01:09:26,360
Yeah, no, they deal with that.

1102
01:09:26,360 --> 01:09:30,480
And dude, the fucking, it was a joke about playing parenthood.

1103
01:09:30,480 --> 01:09:31,600
My standup son.

1104
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:32,600
All right.

1105
01:09:32,600 --> 01:09:33,680
We'll talk about it in a sec.

1106
01:09:33,680 --> 01:09:40,280
So this, this PA that worked at this planned parenthood was a fucking smoke show.

1107
01:09:40,280 --> 01:09:42,640
She was a PA student, right?

1108
01:09:42,640 --> 01:09:43,640
Bro.

1109
01:09:43,640 --> 01:09:46,920
Oh, she was a 10 and a half.

1110
01:09:46,920 --> 01:09:47,920
I don't even know.

1111
01:09:47,920 --> 01:09:48,920
I don't even know how to speak.

1112
01:09:48,920 --> 01:09:49,920
What was her initials?

1113
01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:50,920
Do we know her?

1114
01:09:50,920 --> 01:09:54,120
No, but she, was she blonde hair, brown hair?

1115
01:09:54,120 --> 01:09:59,560
She was just this petite little brunette, just like one of those basic chicks that just

1116
01:09:59,560 --> 01:10:05,480
became a PA just fucking gorgeous dude told me she's like, after I described what was

1117
01:10:05,480 --> 01:10:13,440
going on, told me that she had to look at it and I'm like, Oh no, no, no, no, no, no,

1118
01:10:13,440 --> 01:10:16,440
no, no, no, no.

1119
01:10:16,440 --> 01:10:20,680
I was just like fucking sweating balls.

1120
01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:25,800
I'm like, there's no way that this girl's seeing my fucking tiny little dick.

1121
01:10:25,800 --> 01:10:29,360
So I'm like, is there any way to get, I said, you're the student.

1122
01:10:29,360 --> 01:10:31,760
I said, is there any way to get the PA in here?

1123
01:10:31,760 --> 01:10:33,880
She was like, like 60 dude.

1124
01:10:33,880 --> 01:10:34,880
And she's like, okay.

1125
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:37,120
Well, she was trying to like say, it's okay.

1126
01:10:37,120 --> 01:10:38,120
It's fine.

1127
01:10:38,120 --> 01:10:39,120
Like we'd see this all the time.

1128
01:10:39,120 --> 01:10:40,120
I'm like, I do not care.

1129
01:10:40,120 --> 01:10:41,120
You're not looking at my dick.

1130
01:10:41,120 --> 01:10:42,120
I will leave right now.

1131
01:10:42,120 --> 01:10:47,080
So I got this old ass PA to come in and look at my dick and I was fine.

1132
01:10:47,080 --> 01:10:48,080
It was-

1133
01:10:48,080 --> 01:10:50,800
It's even worse when you're self-conscious about how small you are.

1134
01:10:50,800 --> 01:10:51,840
What's that?

1135
01:10:51,840 --> 01:10:54,840
It's even worse when you're like self-conscious about your cock size.

1136
01:10:54,840 --> 01:10:55,840
Yeah.

1137
01:10:55,840 --> 01:10:57,200
Well, dude, it's like, not only just that.

1138
01:10:57,200 --> 01:11:02,000
It's like, dude, I'm going to pull my pants down in front of this super hot chick.

1139
01:11:02,000 --> 01:11:03,440
Like she, come on.

1140
01:11:03,440 --> 01:11:04,440
She fucking knows.

1141
01:11:04,440 --> 01:11:08,680
She gets hit on probably 20 times a fucking day.

1142
01:11:08,680 --> 01:11:11,760
There's no way I'm alone with you.

1143
01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:14,840
And it's like a fucking, you know, like my fucking ret dream.

1144
01:11:14,840 --> 01:11:15,840
It's like, are you kidding me?

1145
01:11:15,840 --> 01:11:16,840
This girl's telling me to pull my pants up?

1146
01:11:16,840 --> 01:11:17,840
No, this is not happening.

1147
01:11:17,840 --> 01:11:18,840
Put me the old lady in here right now.

1148
01:11:18,840 --> 01:11:19,840
Oh no, now the old lady would be what you're going for.

1149
01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:20,840
Oh no, she was telling me to pull my pants up.

1150
01:11:20,840 --> 01:11:21,840
I'm like, I'm not going to pull my pants up.

1151
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:22,840
I'm not going to pull my pants up.

1152
01:11:22,840 --> 01:11:23,840
I'm not going to pull my pants up.

1153
01:11:23,840 --> 01:11:24,840
I'm not going to pull my pants up.

1154
01:11:24,840 --> 01:11:29,280
I'm not going to pull my pants up.

1155
01:11:29,280 --> 01:11:32,800
She's like, you don't know that.

1156
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:37,080
Dan has a premature ejaculation issue, especially with strippers.

1157
01:11:37,080 --> 01:11:41,920
I did, I did, bro.

1158
01:11:41,920 --> 01:11:46,200
I used to go all the time and I would not in about a minute and a half for them.

1159
01:11:46,200 --> 01:11:49,860
Give me a lap dance night.

1160
01:11:49,860 --> 01:11:55,380
With it with his entire pants on yeah, yeah, it was it was a problem for a while there

1161
01:11:56,100 --> 01:11:57,860
so my

1162
01:11:57,860 --> 01:11:59,860
fuck

1163
01:12:02,180 --> 01:12:08,780
My god, I had I had a call where I had to touch a peener the other day and I was just like

1164
01:12:10,380 --> 01:12:16,760
So fucking a guy called for testicular torsion, which no man should ever have to dig oh

1165
01:12:16,760 --> 01:12:18,760
And

1166
01:12:19,760 --> 01:12:26,720
We're on the stretcher and then he starts screaming I feel what's popping I feel it popping it's popping I feel it wet

1167
01:12:26,720 --> 01:12:28,720
It feels wet. I'm like and

1168
01:12:29,000 --> 01:12:33,820
Of course my partner was a female and she was like you got a check and I'm like fuck

1169
01:12:33,820 --> 01:12:37,840
I'm the one that's a fucking pop. Yeah, so I'm like so I

1170
01:12:38,480 --> 01:12:44,960
Pulled pants down and I had to like look at the the cock and balls and then I just poked his

1171
01:12:44,960 --> 01:12:46,960
fucking ballsack

1172
01:12:51,760 --> 01:12:56,840
Like oh no, and then I just rolled it up Mike it's not wet and it's not exploded you're good

1173
01:12:58,240 --> 01:13:02,060
But okay, so Kyle you played sports in high school, right?

1174
01:13:02,060 --> 01:13:07,840
I played a lot of sports. Yeah, so did you guys have the thing where you had to do like the physical every year?

1175
01:13:07,840 --> 01:13:12,480
We're like the fucking old-ass doctor would like oh, this is um I got a whole comedy bit

1176
01:13:12,480 --> 01:13:18,520
I don't know if you want me to tell it like the fucking that they do like the fushigi balls fucking with

1177
01:13:19,520 --> 01:13:23,600
I literally got a whole comedy. This is what I was just saying earlier

1178
01:13:23,960 --> 01:13:26,480
Dan was I got a whole comedy a bit about

1179
01:13:27,160 --> 01:13:30,880
penis sizes and fucking getting your balls checked like that

1180
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:36,120
Dude, it's here. I hated it. I hated it every year

1181
01:13:36,120 --> 01:13:43,880
I had to get my balls fondled by an old dude in a fucking like small-ass closet. I was that at the church Catholic Church

1182
01:13:46,520 --> 01:13:48,320
No, that was at my high school

1183
01:13:48,320 --> 01:13:49,940
Because they had the nurses office

1184
01:13:49,940 --> 01:13:55,720
But the nurses office had a window that you like looked inside in so they had a closet where they had to check everybody's balls

1185
01:13:55,720 --> 01:14:03,720
And titties so I was fucking go in because you know, I played football and because like I was on varsity my

1186
01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:07,760
Freshman year they have to check if your balls dropped for whatever reason

1187
01:14:08,360 --> 01:14:13,840
So I went in there and he goes alright now come to the closet. I'm like

1188
01:14:15,000 --> 01:14:20,760
They're checking you for a hernia you ass. Nah, dude, they're checking my balls. They're checking if I

1189
01:14:21,440 --> 01:14:24,960
That actually does the fondling like I had like a 60 year old dude

1190
01:14:26,520 --> 01:14:33,200
God I just who would sign up for that dude like his every every sport you had to do it like and I think for women

1191
01:14:33,200 --> 01:14:37,400
They had to like feel like their titties for like cancer or some shit. I don't fucking know your fucking balls touch

1192
01:14:37,400 --> 01:14:39,400
Yeah, I did fucking four times

1193
01:14:40,240 --> 01:14:43,360
All four years of high school. I had to get my balls checked. It's fucking

1194
01:14:44,000 --> 01:14:50,160
I did like when I was younger than that, but they like balls you want this comedy bit. Yeah

1195
01:14:51,400 --> 01:14:53,400
All right, so

1196
01:14:54,240 --> 01:14:59,280
You gotta imagine in the comedy set I've already talked about how I work in sanitation and shit

1197
01:14:59,280 --> 01:15:05,600
So basically how I open it up or like go into this bit. I'll be like, you know, so yeah working sanitation

1198
01:15:07,600 --> 01:15:10,400
You know we have to get the ot physical so

1199
01:15:11,440 --> 01:15:17,600
My number gets called I go down. I see a stock. They're real handsome doctor. Nice blonde hair combed over

1200
01:15:17,600 --> 01:15:20,400
He looks real fucking great. He's you know, you're hard

1201
01:15:22,640 --> 01:15:24,640
In case he's already

1202
01:15:24,640 --> 01:15:29,040
Very happy fucking asshole fucking crowd

1203
01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:36,000
He's a handsome doctor

1204
01:15:36,040 --> 01:15:43,080
Blonde combed over hair mid 30s early 40s probably, you know, and he's telling me we're having a great discussion. He goes listen

1205
01:15:43,640 --> 01:15:49,680
You gotta imagine my fat ass is here in a fucking robe or whatever fucking gown and underwear

1206
01:15:49,840 --> 01:15:52,200
He goes listen got your age

1207
01:15:52,200 --> 01:15:56,400
Late 20s, you should probably get your testosterone check. I say what's that for a doc?

1208
01:15:56,400 --> 01:16:00,200
He goes well, you know, let's get testosterone check and get a baseline

1209
01:16:00,200 --> 01:16:05,480
So when you get older, you know if you've lost it or if you've kept the same gained it whatever it's a good idea

1210
01:16:05,480 --> 01:16:07,480
He goes, all right. Well

1211
01:16:07,480 --> 01:16:11,440
He goes that takes a glove snaps it on he goes. This is everybody's favorite part. I go. All right

1212
01:16:11,440 --> 01:16:15,680
What's that doc? He goes go ahead and drop your underwear down. I gotta get down here and you gotta check your balls

1213
01:16:16,360 --> 01:16:18,360
Okay, so I drop my underwear down

1214
01:16:19,080 --> 01:16:21,080
Here's my fat ass

1215
01:16:21,080 --> 01:16:27,440
Standing there gown pull to the side underwear down cock of balls are hanging out. He's on his knees

1216
01:16:28,080 --> 01:16:31,360
Starts fucking feeling my balls around God. Look left cough. All right

1217
01:16:31,880 --> 01:16:33,880
Look right cough. All right

1218
01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:35,400
He goes

1219
01:16:35,400 --> 01:16:40,800
Goes that takes a glove off snaps it off in the garbage. He goes. I gotta already tell you right now. You've got a high testosterone

1220
01:16:41,800 --> 01:16:43,800
I go

1221
01:16:43,800 --> 01:16:47,720
Fuck are you I said doc? What are you talking about? He's still on his knees my dicks in his face

1222
01:16:47,720 --> 01:16:52,600
He goes I could just tell you right now, but what I've already reserved you have great testosterone. It's very high

1223
01:16:52,600 --> 01:16:58,480
I said doc. I don't know what fuck a team you think I swing for but it's definitely not the team that you're on

1224
01:17:00,560 --> 01:17:02,560
It's he goes

1225
01:17:02,560 --> 01:17:06,000
Don't get it twisted. Don't get it twisted because you know, I don't have anybody

1226
01:17:06,000 --> 01:17:08,880
I will never fuck anybody with the condition that you have

1227
01:17:09,360 --> 01:17:11,080
I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?

1228
01:17:11,080 --> 01:17:15,160
Doc you can't tell me I have cancer or something when my balls are fucked up. He goes no you got dick does

1229
01:17:15,160 --> 01:17:19,480
I'm like, what the fuck is that doc? Is that deadly? He goes. No, it's not deadly

1230
01:17:19,480 --> 01:17:24,280
But you know, I could tell you right now, you know, please any woman with it. They go. We'll give it to me straight doc

1231
01:17:24,280 --> 01:17:28,800
What is it? He goes? Well pretty much your fat ass gut hangs out two feet further and your dick does

1232
01:17:33,800 --> 01:17:35,800
After I get the

1233
01:17:35,800 --> 01:17:39,960
Embarrassment pulling my fucking underwear up pulling the gown back over

1234
01:17:39,960 --> 01:17:43,320
He goes you can put your clothes back on nurse to come in and fucking check your clothes

1235
01:17:43,320 --> 01:17:46,840
But I got nurse to come in and fucking check you out. So now I'm self-conscious

1236
01:17:47,760 --> 01:17:49,160
but I

1237
01:17:49,160 --> 01:17:53,360
Come up with a plan. I come up with a plan because like I said, I work in sanitation

1238
01:17:54,560 --> 01:18:00,040
All of a sudden I became a massive proponent in the transgender community in the transgender movement

1239
01:18:00,760 --> 01:18:07,480
And it's like not for don't applaud me. It's not for any reason that you guys think it's personally selfish

1240
01:18:07,840 --> 01:18:10,280
Nothing for you guys. I don't care what you guys do

1241
01:18:10,280 --> 01:18:17,640
But these faggots are cutting their fucking dicks off and turn them in the pussies. We got to be putting these dick somewhere, right?

1242
01:18:22,880 --> 01:18:25,240
What I've been doing is fucking dumpster diving

1243
01:18:26,440 --> 01:18:31,600
Because there's gotta be a fucking six to eight inch fucking white fucking cock somewhere in these fuckers

1244
01:18:33,240 --> 01:18:35,600
Fuck it's trapped up motherfucker on

1245
01:18:35,600 --> 01:18:42,640
Roll up to the fucking doctor's office kick that fucking door down and say what's that little fucking dickie?

1246
01:18:46,640 --> 01:18:50,920
Sucker the only issue was I did a dry run before I kicked the door down

1247
01:18:50,920 --> 01:18:56,080
It was a fucking three-year-old girl in there talking to a girl nurse. So now I'm not allowed 500 feet

1248
01:18:56,080 --> 01:19:03,240
I'm not allowed 500 feet with it a fucking that's neither here nor there the fucking doc. I got my point across

1249
01:19:03,240 --> 01:19:10,560
But I think we're really missing a real opportunity here because we have all these warehouses down here in fucking downtown, Albany, Detroit shit

1250
01:19:11,000 --> 01:19:13,900
We can set up fucking use cock fucking salesman

1251
01:19:13,960 --> 01:19:21,560
You know line these fucking cut off fucking cocks up in the fucking warehouse and have a guy come up here and he gets to you

1252
01:19:21,560 --> 01:19:23,560
Yeah, this is gonna be $2,000

1253
01:19:23,560 --> 01:19:25,560
Oh

1254
01:19:25,960 --> 01:19:27,960
It's beepers

1255
01:19:29,120 --> 01:19:31,120
Finally is on the fucking podcast

1256
01:19:32,000 --> 01:19:34,000
He's trying to ruin it welcome

1257
01:19:34,480 --> 01:19:38,000
Fucking cocks up or whatever you go down there you talk to the fucking salesman

1258
01:19:38,000 --> 01:19:40,000
He says hey, you want to take this one out for a test drive

1259
01:19:40,960 --> 01:19:44,040
Eight inches of fucking black. This is exactly what I'm looking for

1260
01:19:44,360 --> 01:19:48,180
Tied that motherfucker on you go see your old lady a fucker in a motel room

1261
01:19:48,240 --> 01:19:51,760
But the best part is the salesman is right behind you you fucking banging her

1262
01:19:51,760 --> 01:19:57,240
She's loving the fucking bigger cock he reaches down goes. Yeah, you know, this is the fucking VT model

1263
01:19:57,240 --> 01:20:02,760
You know if you fucking grab your left not right here, you feel that all sudden your fucking new cocks. I was a vibrate

1264
01:20:04,280 --> 01:20:07,880
What is that? He goes? Yeah, you fucking squeeze that you see that

1265
01:20:07,880 --> 01:20:13,220
But if you reach down here and you fucking squeeze your right nut and then you could just change the fucking pattern

1266
01:20:13,680 --> 01:20:16,920
Fucking all of a sudden you go from one fucking long vibrate the fucking

1267
01:20:16,920 --> 01:20:20,840
Jesus Christ you pull out of there you go back to the fucking lot

1268
01:20:20,840 --> 01:20:25,840
Just like buying a fucking car to cocksucker wants to hackle you. Well, listen, you know doc

1269
01:20:25,840 --> 01:20:32,240
I only have fucking fifteen hundred dollars. This is a two thousand dollar cock, you know, but like maybe we can make a fucking deal here

1270
01:20:36,240 --> 01:20:38,240
Back

1271
01:20:39,240 --> 01:20:43,200
1750 I told you fucking 1500 farm

1272
01:20:43,200 --> 01:20:47,360
Let me go make another fucking call. He goes back 1750 last offer

1273
01:20:47,360 --> 01:20:51,200
So you put a fifteen hundred dollar fucking down payment on a new fucking cock

1274
01:20:51,200 --> 01:20:54,160
You got a two hundred fifty dollar payment for the next two months

1275
01:20:54,640 --> 01:20:59,840
Who fucking cares you got an eight inch fucking cock people pay less for a fucking dildo

1276
01:20:59,840 --> 01:21:01,840
All right suction cups to the fucking shower

1277
01:21:02,880 --> 01:21:07,280
Would you okay say say it was 250 bucks a month

1278
01:21:08,000 --> 01:21:10,800
But you know, I'm not gonna say it was 250 bucks a month

1279
01:21:10,800 --> 01:21:15,040
150 bucks a month, but you could have like a porn star cock

1280
01:21:16,360 --> 01:21:18,360
No

1281
01:21:29,080 --> 01:21:34,280
All right, who has what size cock do you got there Kyle how many inches all right

1282
01:21:34,280 --> 01:21:41,360
Oh good day on a good day chubbed up before that. Hello beepers. Welcome to the podcast

1283
01:21:48,840 --> 01:21:50,840
Who never comes to the podcast

1284
01:21:55,880 --> 01:21:57,880
Why you putting that in your mouth Tyler

1285
01:21:57,880 --> 01:21:59,880
She's just fucking

1286
01:22:02,840 --> 01:22:08,560
Fucking tell tell beef is to come to the fucking hundred episode and stop getting a tattoo on his face

1287
01:22:15,800 --> 01:22:20,400
Beepers I we I've seen your cock before we all know that you have the biggest cock here

1288
01:22:20,400 --> 01:22:27,640
It's it's it's a problem. You need to you need to stop. What's your body count beepers? Cuz we all said ours. Uh, I

1289
01:22:28,920 --> 01:22:30,920
forgot to pay my minutes

1290
01:22:34,840 --> 01:22:36,840
Nice cock bro

1291
01:22:36,880 --> 01:22:43,320
Thank you. What a hundred I'm guessing it's over a hundred. No way beepers has over a hundred bodies

1292
01:22:43,320 --> 01:22:46,000
You think so can be back my way good old do you

1293
01:22:47,880 --> 01:22:52,080
Can you tell the story about the time a girl threw up on your cock on my fucking couch

1294
01:22:57,040 --> 01:23:00,360
Fucking ass hat got his dick snuck up my fucking couch

1295
01:23:04,080 --> 01:23:11,240
Here's the problem I keep listening to college Kyle's like Kyle's podcast with Kyle on your podcast and he does not know how to tell a story

1296
01:23:11,240 --> 01:23:13,640
Cuz he thinks I'm different story

1297
01:23:15,840 --> 01:23:17,840
Like Tyler

1298
01:23:18,360 --> 01:23:24,740
Happened in my car what happened on my couch? What no no no better story better story, so

1299
01:23:25,440 --> 01:23:29,720
Shaw no Mac here goes. Hey come out with my friend Emily

1300
01:23:30,360 --> 01:23:34,060
You know, I think you can get with her or whatever. We're going out to the bar

1301
01:23:34,060 --> 01:23:38,260
I want to get with this other girl Emily sorry gets confusing. There's two Emily's here

1302
01:23:38,260 --> 01:23:44,800
Okay, there's Emily who's part of the boys and there's Emily who Sean Oh Mac is trying to get with right and

1303
01:23:45,520 --> 01:23:47,820
So I have the beep beep jeep

1304
01:23:48,220 --> 01:23:52,180
So I go grab these girls with the beep beep jeep Sean. I'm sitting in the front

1305
01:23:52,180 --> 01:23:55,960
We go out shopping we all know how much shopping sucks right with the ladies

1306
01:23:56,360 --> 01:23:59,960
so me and Sean are sitting outside the dressing room just

1307
01:24:00,920 --> 01:24:04,880
Bullshit and making jokes making fun of each other right am I wrong Sean?

1308
01:24:04,880 --> 01:24:12,440
Not yet. There's three girls here. There's two Emily's and this girl Savannah

1309
01:24:14,240 --> 01:24:19,600
Push comes to shove we go to a birthday party right for one of Emily's friends

1310
01:24:20,280 --> 01:24:23,680
And I start hitting it up with this fucking Savannah girl

1311
01:24:23,680 --> 01:24:29,300
I'm making out with her Sean I was doing this thing with this girl Emily that he's trying to get with things are going good

1312
01:24:29,300 --> 01:24:36,900
Right the other Emily who's pretty much one of the boys at this point just how she still is goes Kyle listen

1313
01:24:37,480 --> 01:24:43,560
Savannah's a lightweight don't give her too much alcohol. She will fucking fall off. I'm like

1314
01:24:44,200 --> 01:24:47,760
Who the fuck is this broad to tell me what the fucking dope right?

1315
01:24:48,560 --> 01:24:53,360
fucking sack of shit, so I'm feeding shots this girl Savannah I

1316
01:24:54,120 --> 01:24:58,320
Don't know what Sean. I was doing. I've lost contact with him. We go to Pearl Street Pub

1317
01:24:58,320 --> 01:25:02,360
I'm a Troy boy. I shouldn't be in an Albany bar, but here we are

1318
01:25:03,760 --> 01:25:10,320
Basically what ends up happening is exactly what Emily told me was gonna happen Savannah has way too much fucking alcohol and

1319
01:25:11,480 --> 01:25:14,760
The bouncer pretty much throws her out so now I gotta go with her

1320
01:25:14,760 --> 01:25:21,140
I find Sean Oh Sean Oh is outside making out with this girl Emily outside. I go hey Sean. Oh, we gotta go

1321
01:25:21,640 --> 01:25:24,400
What do you mean? We gotta go? I said she just got kicked out

1322
01:25:24,400 --> 01:25:28,960
We gotta go so we pile up in this deal fucking piece of shit soupy right?

1323
01:25:30,160 --> 01:25:33,400
Sean Oh drives me back to my shit ass apartment Troy and

1324
01:25:34,200 --> 01:25:39,200
Said hey, he just stops. He doesn't park it like you normally does stops in front of the house

1325
01:25:39,200 --> 01:25:42,880
They go Sean are you coming up? It was not I got work to do or whatever

1326
01:25:45,320 --> 01:25:49,800
He said something like that I got work to do so now I got this fucking

1327
01:25:50,800 --> 01:25:52,800
Probably said I have to attend business

1328
01:25:52,800 --> 01:25:54,800
I

1329
01:25:56,280 --> 01:26:02,960
Whole ride is Savannah passing out on my fucking chest and this girl Emily up front like I can't wait

1330
01:26:02,960 --> 01:26:09,520
I shit you not she I can't wait to choke on your fucking dick the whole ride the whole fucking ride

1331
01:26:09,520 --> 01:26:14,700
I'm like so Sean Oh is getting laid. How the fuck do you do it Sean? I got a better

1332
01:26:14,700 --> 01:26:21,320
It's better. It's better bro. It's better to this point the story there has not been any embezzlement yet, but I'm sure it's

1333
01:26:24,260 --> 01:26:26,700
Bricks so I'm like Sean. Oh, you're not coming upstairs

1334
01:26:27,220 --> 01:26:30,540
They're like he you know he tells me what to do. I'm like fuck me

1335
01:26:30,840 --> 01:26:36,700
So I'm hammered because I can't not be hammered when there's alcohol around right this girl's hammered

1336
01:26:36,740 --> 01:26:40,540
So I'm like alright, so I'd get her upstairs. We sit down on the couch. I

1337
01:26:40,540 --> 01:26:48,140
Don't fuck dropped out. Yeah, throw something on yet. She looks at me. She's like she goes

1338
01:26:49,100 --> 01:26:55,660
Are we gonna go to your room or what oh here? We go. I'm getting my fucking dick what right?

1339
01:26:56,380 --> 01:27:00,860
So I'm like why don't you go get yourself ready in the room, honey? I gotta go take a piss quick

1340
01:27:00,860 --> 01:27:04,620
I'll be right in I go take a piss I come in she's knocked the fuck out

1341
01:27:05,140 --> 01:27:08,540
Some like fuck me now. I like to sleep my underwear

1342
01:27:08,540 --> 01:27:14,660
So stripped out of my underwear get next to her start fucking kissing on her neck. She wakes up a little bit

1343
01:27:14,660 --> 01:27:16,340
She kind of moans and groans

1344
01:27:16,340 --> 01:27:22,300
Yeah, the artist so she starts jerking me off a little bit right now. I got like a three-quarters large car

1345
01:27:23,260 --> 01:27:25,260
She stops jerking me off

1346
01:27:25,620 --> 01:27:27,020
Yeah, hey

1347
01:27:27,020 --> 01:27:29,020
Cheeks what's going on?

1348
01:27:32,060 --> 01:27:34,740
Then I don't wake up honey. We got work to do whatever

1349
01:27:34,740 --> 01:27:38,700
I looked over at me and she goes I'm on a bed

1350
01:27:38,980 --> 01:27:44,540
So I'm like smacking my dick off her fucking thigh or whatever like wake up wake up wake up

1351
01:27:45,140 --> 01:27:49,540
Now the manner of it she doesn't so the manner of me not want to catch a me too

1352
01:27:49,540 --> 01:27:56,120
I'm like I'm gonna go sleep on the couch. She's like no stay with me. Stay with me. So like I whatever so pretty much

1353
01:27:56,120 --> 01:27:57,820
We just caught up for the whole night, right?

1354
01:27:57,820 --> 01:28:03,020
And then I wake up in the morning drive her she had to go to like hairstyle in school or whatever

1355
01:28:03,020 --> 01:28:06,660
And so I dropped her off in the morning. So I dropped her off

1356
01:28:07,260 --> 01:28:12,340
On my way back to my apartment. I call Sean. Oh, I'm like, well at least Sean. Oh got his dick

1357
01:28:12,340 --> 01:28:18,840
What and I fuck a call him. I'm like, hey Sean on that. I was last night and he goes bro

1358
01:28:19,460 --> 01:28:21,460
Things are fucking bad

1359
01:28:25,220 --> 01:28:30,680
She's fucking texting me right now she's pissed saying I fucking raped her or whatever

1360
01:28:30,680 --> 01:28:35,500
What it was a molester she said some kind of term or whatever. He's like I didn't do anything

1361
01:28:35,500 --> 01:28:39,980
I dropped her off at her house and went fucking home. Things are fucking terrible

1362
01:28:48,660 --> 01:28:50,660
I never talked her again. I literally

1363
01:28:52,620 --> 01:28:57,620
Fuck in we get to her house and I'm like, alright, I'm going home like see you later

1364
01:28:57,620 --> 01:29:03,100
She's like you're not gonna come in like no, I'm not gonna fucking come in you're drooling on yourself

1365
01:29:03,100 --> 01:29:07,220
We won't fucking home as a context like to this me

1366
01:29:07,860 --> 01:29:09,860
the two girls are

1367
01:29:10,460 --> 01:29:15,840
Demolished like to the point where like if you ask me to walk a straight line and wind up in Canada

1368
01:29:17,460 --> 01:29:20,300
And I'm the most sober out of the three, you know

1369
01:29:20,900 --> 01:29:24,500
The whole time the whole ride home the Kyle was not there's no embezzlement there

1370
01:29:24,500 --> 01:29:28,060
She's like I can't wait to suck your dick. Oh

1371
01:29:29,380 --> 01:29:33,500
She was like a fucking hyena who saw a piece of fresh meat

1372
01:29:37,940 --> 01:29:43,340
She was saying she was making me horny I'm like, oh my god Sean. I was getting his fucking dick

1373
01:29:44,540 --> 01:29:48,100
I just like that you call him shits bad

1374
01:29:48,100 --> 01:29:57,740
I call like that fucking poon Tang probably like shit's fucking bad right now, bro

1375
01:30:04,780 --> 01:30:06,420
The best part of it is

1376
01:30:06,420 --> 01:30:12,100
Shaw gets accused of a rape, you know, but he did not do he dropped this girl off at home

1377
01:30:12,100 --> 01:30:18,220
And he went home with the bed and he had like one twisted T. He normally does so

1378
01:30:18,220 --> 01:30:23,740
I'm like, alright, so now it's like what I don't know eight o'clock nine o'clock in the morning

1379
01:30:23,740 --> 01:30:29,660
I'm like, alright things good. I'm gonna go to bed. I don't have to work for fucking, you know a day and a half

1380
01:30:30,260 --> 01:30:32,300
I'm just gonna go to bed. Everything's gonna be good

1381
01:30:32,300 --> 01:30:35,300
I go to bed at like nine o'clock in the morning

1382
01:30:35,300 --> 01:30:42,060
Who shows up at the foot of my bed at 10 30 in the morning is other than fucking Sean O'Mac

1383
01:30:42,500 --> 01:30:44,500
Get your fat ass out of bed

1384
01:30:46,020 --> 01:30:52,460
What do you want he goes we got a firehouse back with the go-to in fucking eight hours like what?

1385
01:30:54,940 --> 01:30:57,460
He's like I was gonna bring that girl as a date. Oh

1386
01:30:58,740 --> 01:31:01,420
She don't want to go. So you're my date. I'm like

1387
01:31:01,420 --> 01:31:07,380
I was like Sean what time I was like, what time is it? He's like, it's like 11 o'clock in the morning

1388
01:31:07,380 --> 01:31:08,220
Oh, all right

1389
01:31:08,220 --> 01:31:13,540
This is gonna go one or two ways you either bring me down to the corner store right now to get a for local gold

1390
01:31:13,740 --> 01:31:17,300
and we keep going and I just stay drunk for the next three days or

1391
01:31:18,060 --> 01:31:22,140
I'm gonna crash out in a half hour and I'm not gonna be usable

1392
01:31:23,820 --> 01:31:29,080
Firehouse banquet and fuck it Tony Nardone is there and he goes listen

1393
01:31:29,080 --> 01:31:33,140
I know you need to be to work in the morning if you call out, I swear to God. I'm a punch in the mouth

1394
01:31:35,580 --> 01:31:43,380
But it's an but it's an open bar it's a fucking open bar so obviously I called out in the morning, you know

1395
01:31:46,620 --> 01:31:48,620
And I called out in the morning, you know

1396
01:31:50,620 --> 01:31:55,820
Fuckin now that I miss any part of that shuttle that I was pretty close. Yeah

1397
01:31:55,820 --> 01:32:02,300
So beep is beep is now that you're here and welcome to the podcast for the first time beep is everybody

1398
01:32:02,300 --> 01:32:08,140
We do we have a clapping sound effect. No, why do you have shut up your nose? I got two cigarettes up

1399
01:32:08,140 --> 01:32:11,100
But my nose is fine cigarettes near nose. It smells good

1400
01:32:12,300 --> 01:32:13,980
but

1401
01:32:13,980 --> 01:32:19,140
What now they're the jar and blacks at a clove one. Can you remind me not this close?

1402
01:32:20,420 --> 01:32:24,340
They're not even cigarettes are closed their clothes dude. They smell so good and

1403
01:32:24,340 --> 01:32:28,820
That's a motherfucking cigolo. Yeah, let me not smoke those

1404
01:32:31,460 --> 01:32:36,500
Now they're my they're up his nose I'll still smoke it

1405
01:32:45,740 --> 01:32:48,620
Shawn do you have a higher than 28 body count? I

1406
01:32:48,620 --> 01:32:54,020
Would like to exercise my fifth amendment right so that's a yes

1407
01:32:55,420 --> 01:33:01,340
He's absolutely above 28. All right, he slings that fucking long skinny fucking rot around

1408
01:33:02,860 --> 01:33:09,240
Well, I can't believe that brother sent me a fucking message of his cock because he thought my name was Taylor

1409
01:33:09,240 --> 01:33:16,040
Oh, I thought your name was Taylor. Oh, you're right next to each other in the thing. Ah fuck

1410
01:33:17,800 --> 01:33:21,280
Nice cock, bro. He's got a full up. She was cock

1411
01:33:25,240 --> 01:33:32,200
Yeah time one time actually cuz I wanted to share the story on my podcast but I probably shouldn't it's not a good story

1412
01:33:32,200 --> 01:33:34,200
to share on my podcast, but

1413
01:33:35,000 --> 01:33:37,560
Yeah, you can do our podcast

1414
01:33:37,560 --> 01:33:43,280
We had a big Troy boys group chat plus all the dispatchers plus a few others

1415
01:33:43,600 --> 01:33:45,600
right and so

1416
01:33:46,120 --> 01:33:53,240
The entire group chat was at my house except for Sean Oh and we were gonna go on the Troy bar crawl and like

1417
01:33:53,240 --> 01:33:59,520
You know ashmore was living with me fuck Patagene and all fucking Bowman

1418
01:33:59,520 --> 01:34:01,520
There was a whole bunch of people out in the living room

1419
01:34:01,520 --> 01:34:03,520
Bowman so I go in the bathroom

1420
01:34:03,520 --> 01:34:05,520
I go in the bathroom

1421
01:34:05,520 --> 01:34:09,400
I go in the bathroom. Yeah, do some cocaine right and

1422
01:34:09,920 --> 01:34:13,760
No, I mark Mark Bowman. Yeah, Mark Bowman. That's heavy

1423
01:34:15,320 --> 01:34:19,640
Yeah, and so I do a bunch of cocaine off my fucking toilet seat, right?

1424
01:34:20,880 --> 01:34:22,880
And I tech Sean I

1425
01:34:23,160 --> 01:34:28,140
Said bro. I just told these fucking idiots that I was gonna go in here and take a shit

1426
01:34:28,140 --> 01:34:32,620
I just ripped the last half of my fucking eight ball off my fucking toilet seat

1427
01:34:32,620 --> 01:34:38,700
And I'm just sitting there waiting waiting waiting no reply. I'm like, whatever fuck you Sean

1428
01:34:38,700 --> 01:34:44,340
I give a fuck you want to fucking not call out of work to go fucking on the bar crawl the boys go fuck

1429
01:34:44,340 --> 01:34:48,820
I walk out to the living room now everybody set up like they're ready for fucking intervention

1430
01:34:51,540 --> 01:34:55,680
What's the matter you guys ready go on the bar crawl or what you know, like

1431
01:34:56,660 --> 01:34:58,900
We think we might want to talk to you. Um

1432
01:34:58,900 --> 01:35:01,860
But that text message you just sent to us

1433
01:35:03,220 --> 01:35:06,940
What do you mean? I pull it open. I said the whole fucking group chat

1434
01:35:07,580 --> 01:35:13,500
Plus Sean of the people that are in my fucking living room that I just blew half an eight ball off my toilet seat

1435
01:35:13,620 --> 01:35:16,500
While lying to them about taking a fucking shit

1436
01:35:20,420 --> 01:35:27,100
Don't do drugs kids what is I'm never time me in you and ash born called out from your roof

1437
01:35:27,100 --> 01:35:28,420
Oh

1438
01:35:28,420 --> 01:35:30,420
even better even better

1439
01:35:31,340 --> 01:35:35,100
The best part was a week later that roof fell off my fucking house

1440
01:35:36,940 --> 01:35:40,380
You ever we called out to was it was Chrissy wasn't it?

1441
01:35:40,380 --> 01:35:51,380
Oh, please please let me show you my fucking balls

1442
01:35:53,100 --> 01:35:55,580
Chrissy let me show you let me send you my balls

1443
01:36:00,100 --> 01:36:04,140
We called out on FaceTime we facetimed her all the proof was called out

1444
01:36:04,140 --> 01:36:11,860
I want to show you my balls. She's like don't do that. He's like, please

1445
01:36:20,340 --> 01:36:22,340
Please please

1446
01:36:22,340 --> 01:36:31,060
I get it sounds like the call duty fucking episode. Yeah. Oh

1447
01:36:36,100 --> 01:36:39,940
Fuck I'm playing the story of a

1448
01:36:42,380 --> 01:36:44,380
Fucking the funeral

1449
01:36:44,380 --> 01:36:47,220
There's so many parts of it I fucking

1450
01:36:47,740 --> 01:36:54,700
It ended with me and glue and fist fighting on my lawn. Yeah, so we were all at shoulders house right after

1451
01:36:55,860 --> 01:37:00,340
This was after the wake after yeah. Yeah after the wake and uh

1452
01:37:01,420 --> 01:37:05,460
First of all, I have videos from that night and Coleman was so hammered

1453
01:37:05,460 --> 01:37:08,660
He was talking about how broke he was but he's like I wasn't so broken

1454
01:37:08,660 --> 01:37:14,780
I couldn't go next door at work for pizza. I like I was really broke

1455
01:37:16,780 --> 01:37:20,140
Omen is hollering like screaming

1456
01:37:20,780 --> 01:37:26,780
And at the time for had a really gay like really gay roommate like gay gay

1457
01:37:27,140 --> 01:37:32,460
Yeah, so he wakes up and he comes out and he's like Adam you have to stop

1458
01:37:32,460 --> 01:37:38,180
Like like hollering at him in fucking the gay

1459
01:37:41,260 --> 01:37:44,860
So we fucking no, I don't know who he was

1460
01:37:49,540 --> 01:37:55,460
Seemingly goes their own way like just everybody just decides to go on their own adventure

1461
01:37:55,460 --> 01:38:03,460
And I don't know will Coleman ended up going to sleep on the couch. I don't know what happened to Kyle and I left

1462
01:38:03,820 --> 01:38:09,460
I was like, alright, I'll see you guys in the morning. I'll pick you up at 7 or whatever time it was for the funeral. I

1463
01:38:10,100 --> 01:38:12,100
go home

1464
01:38:12,140 --> 01:38:16,420
Shower go to bed and I get up I get my suit on you know, yeah

1465
01:38:16,980 --> 01:38:18,980
Drive down Kyle's house and I get there

1466
01:38:19,220 --> 01:38:24,180
And I'm like, I'm gonna go to bed and I'm like, I'm gonna go to bed and I'm like, I'm gonna go to bed

1467
01:38:24,180 --> 01:38:27,940
Drive down Kyle's house and they get there and there's nobody there and I'm like

1468
01:38:32,300 --> 01:38:35,740
No Adams car no Kyle's car, you know nothing

1469
01:38:36,900 --> 01:38:40,220
Like oh, maybe they went to go get some I don't know

1470
01:38:41,060 --> 01:38:43,060
so like ten minutes goes by and

1471
01:38:43,060 --> 01:38:54,420
All I can hear coming down the block is just like now

1472
01:38:54,740 --> 01:38:56,740
These two fucking

1473
01:38:57,060 --> 01:39:02,740
Chuckle pucks come down the block. No, no doors on the Jeep. No roof. No nothing. It's cold out

1474
01:39:04,020 --> 01:39:06,020
fucking they got their

1475
01:39:06,260 --> 01:39:09,340
Coleman sitting on the roll bar up top Kyle's blacked out

1476
01:39:09,340 --> 01:39:12,140
They fucking like beach the Jeep in the lawn

1477
01:39:14,260 --> 01:39:18,020
Get in the car and we're like, all right, here we go. Let's go

1478
01:39:22,300 --> 01:39:25,500
I'm sleep. I go to sleep for like an hour and a half

1479
01:39:26,020 --> 01:39:30,140
I don't know how I got home. Like I thought you brought me home Sean. No, I don't know

1480
01:39:30,140 --> 01:39:35,100
I don't know how you go home either had to have been Rebecca somebody brought me home and so I

1481
01:39:35,740 --> 01:39:37,740
Finally fall asleep

1482
01:39:37,740 --> 01:39:45,500
I finally fall asleep. I wash my balls fall asleep and like 45 minutes after me fall asleep. You're gonna full call from Coleman

1483
01:39:45,740 --> 01:39:50,660
Yeah, can you come pick me up so we can make any time for Sean to pick us up?

1484
01:39:50,660 --> 01:39:57,540
I'm like, yeah, that's fine sons up. I'm still drunk. It's fucking drive out the shoulders and Gilded wood pick them up and

1485
01:39:59,380 --> 01:40:03,260
Adam steals his piss-warm 30 rack of Budweiser

1486
01:40:03,260 --> 01:40:05,260
So

1487
01:40:07,220 --> 01:40:12,080
We're drinking this the whole way back to my house and I'm like we're listening to fucking rap

1488
01:40:12,080 --> 01:40:17,320
I don't care. It would bang at DMX Adam the whole ride from fucking

1489
01:40:18,140 --> 01:40:25,540
alternate seven like from fucking College City Bridge to my apartment in Lansing Berg just sits on top of my Jeep

1490
01:40:26,420 --> 01:40:30,020
This fucking banging beers. I'm banging beers

1491
01:40:30,020 --> 01:40:37,180
I'm barely awake fuck a blackout fucking driving down for that and I beach it bang it off the front of my house

1492
01:40:37,180 --> 01:40:39,180
I said we're gonna park it right here

1493
01:40:42,860 --> 01:40:49,300
They fucking they get in the car and I don't know between here and the funeral I don't know how I

1494
01:40:49,980 --> 01:40:52,820
Don't remember how but somehow Jaina ended up with us

1495
01:40:53,060 --> 01:40:58,860
So she's in the front seat and she is when she had just had surgery. She might have been the one that brought me home

1496
01:40:58,860 --> 01:41:00,860
No

1497
01:41:01,780 --> 01:41:04,100
She went home with somebody else I'm just not talking about that

1498
01:41:07,740 --> 01:41:11,180
Neela says she winds up my house in the morning. She had a

1499
01:41:13,380 --> 01:41:18,340
Gigantic hot pink cast on her arm. Alright, so we're driving down 90

1500
01:41:18,340 --> 01:41:24,140
I don't even remember we had to go out to like eat bomb you had no license. I didn't have a license at the time

1501
01:41:24,140 --> 01:41:26,140
And

1502
01:41:27,580 --> 01:41:30,680
Booking Kyler in the back seat throw an empty beer cans out

1503
01:41:34,780 --> 01:41:36,940
So we get like 20 minutes away and

1504
01:41:37,700 --> 01:41:43,900
Coleman just sits up. Yes me to stop. So I was dead. He was dead. He was dead like drew on self

1505
01:41:43,900 --> 01:41:46,220
He sits up he goes pull over now

1506
01:41:46,860 --> 01:41:52,100
I'm like what the f*** I pull over he gets out of the car and just starts pop like projectile vomiting everywhere

1507
01:41:52,100 --> 01:41:56,020
And I'm like, oh my god, like this is not happening. Jane is throwing a fucking fit

1508
01:41:56,020 --> 01:41:59,800
She's hit me in the head with her cast throwing up out the side. I'm like

1509
01:42:04,980 --> 01:42:09,420
On the top of the fuck it's Subaru Sean has no license

1510
01:42:14,340 --> 01:42:17,540
We go to the funeral do thing and then we go to the

1511
01:42:17,540 --> 01:42:22,780
Celebrate the best part about the funeral was so Sean and Jaina go went first, right?

1512
01:42:22,780 --> 01:42:30,040
So they get in a good spot me and Adam are out ripping. Oh fucking what was his name? Oh that kid

1513
01:42:31,740 --> 01:42:36,700
That was he was dating Amanda for a little while there was his name so when a

1514
01:42:41,140 --> 01:42:43,140
Why my blanket

1515
01:42:43,140 --> 01:42:50,100
Oh now, you know it though, it's not it's not aiden it's fucking

1516
01:42:51,580 --> 01:42:53,420
It's not Anders

1517
01:42:53,420 --> 01:42:55,180
It's the Anders

1518
01:42:55,180 --> 01:43:00,740
No, he wasn't that wasn't him. No, you remember? No, but you remember the fucking name of the kid

1519
01:43:02,980 --> 01:43:07,240
But anyway, so basically the kid yeah, yeah, yeah

1520
01:43:07,240 --> 01:43:12,960
It's our way she and Amanda and Anders were engaged Anders. Yeah, but that wasn't him

1521
01:43:12,960 --> 01:43:18,000
No, but he gave me and Coleman like a fit the soko. Oh, yeah

1522
01:43:18,640 --> 01:43:23,520
Yes, he enters came out give me a Coleman a fit the fucking soko. We split it

1523
01:43:23,520 --> 01:43:27,040
Dan, it doesn't look like you have teeth right now. You're just going

1524
01:43:28,280 --> 01:43:30,280
We're already

1525
01:43:30,280 --> 01:43:35,640
We're already demolished. We split the fit the soko and we go in there and who's out there and

1526
01:43:35,640 --> 01:43:38,160
Fucking cocksucker Mike Daly, right?

1527
01:43:39,600 --> 01:43:41,600
We like

1528
01:43:43,600 --> 01:43:49,520
He just smells the alcohol and he's like I can't fucking believe you pathetic pathetic

1529
01:43:50,600 --> 01:43:52,920
You know, I'm crying my eyes out

1530
01:43:52,920 --> 01:43:57,840
You know, he's lost one of my fucking best friends is dead in the casket in front of him

1531
01:43:57,840 --> 01:44:04,320
And he's like you fucking pathetic piece of fucking garbage and then they start to service and after

1532
01:44:04,320 --> 01:44:06,320
service and Adams like

1533
01:44:09,360 --> 01:44:11,360
Thanks, buddy

1534
01:44:11,520 --> 01:44:13,520
so we go to the

1535
01:44:13,840 --> 01:44:15,480
celebration after

1536
01:44:15,480 --> 01:44:16,840
and uh

1537
01:44:16,840 --> 01:44:20,600
Sam Sam four of us to me Jane on frickin frack

1538
01:44:21,400 --> 01:44:26,420
And we get there we park on uh, I get out

1539
01:44:27,520 --> 01:44:30,440
Garce Rebecca walks up. I'm talking to her

1540
01:44:30,440 --> 01:44:34,360
Give her a hug Kyle and Adam go to get out and they're just like full

1541
01:44:38,040 --> 01:44:40,480
She looks at them she goes leave

1542
01:44:42,000 --> 01:44:46,280
Who said that Rebecca she goes they can that you they have to go

1543
01:44:47,240 --> 01:44:49,400
Understandably, so they were drooling on themselves

1544
01:44:50,640 --> 01:44:55,960
We had so I I had been drinking non-stop for probably six days straight now

1545
01:44:55,960 --> 01:45:01,840
So like we get back up. I'm like, all right. That's probably a good idea. So we in the car

1546
01:45:02,920 --> 01:45:07,120
I'm pissed off because we can't go get a free. Yeah, these two are mad

1547
01:45:07,800 --> 01:45:11,920
So it's just an uncomfortably awkward ride home. I'm blaming Adam

1548
01:45:12,480 --> 01:45:14,480
Jaina is still hitting everyone with her

1549
01:45:14,480 --> 01:45:24,000
Ass and we dropped her off. I think at her parents. Yeah parents out and we get Kyle and at this point

1550
01:45:24,000 --> 01:45:26,800
Kyle and Adam are dead asleep. They're both in the backseat

1551
01:45:27,800 --> 01:45:31,520
Jaina gets out. I'm like, I just keep driving you get back

1552
01:45:32,320 --> 01:45:34,320
We fucking get to Kyle's house

1553
01:45:34,600 --> 01:45:39,920
They get out and all of a sudden they went from drooling like on each other's shoulders

1554
01:45:39,920 --> 01:45:43,920
like two little toddlers to they both saw red

1555
01:45:47,720 --> 01:45:49,720
Still blacked out are trying

1556
01:45:50,640 --> 01:45:55,760
Now there's there was the embezzlement. They didn't fistfight in the front lawn. They tried to fistfight

1557
01:45:56,760 --> 01:46:00,400
The point where they were like swinging towards each other and falling

1558
01:46:02,280 --> 01:46:04,280
This one I

1559
01:46:04,280 --> 01:46:08,120
Looked at the tool. I looked at the two of them. I said I'm done with this and I got my car in luck

1560
01:46:08,120 --> 01:46:14,600
This went on for like 15 minutes me and Sean or me and Adam trying to have a fistfight in my lawn

1561
01:46:15,200 --> 01:46:17,200
Nobody connected a punch

1562
01:46:19,920 --> 01:46:21,920
I was like you fucking

1563
01:46:22,280 --> 01:46:23,420
scumbag

1564
01:46:23,420 --> 01:46:25,920
Fucking ruinous, but he's fucking going to me

1565
01:46:25,920 --> 01:46:31,320
I'm going to him but like the best part of this is so Adam goes up

1566
01:46:31,320 --> 01:46:37,080
He passed on the couch or passed out in the bed and I remember waking up then Sean. Were you there?

1567
01:46:37,080 --> 01:46:41,720
No, I left I was so mad at you. Do I left? Yeah, but did you come back with Rebecca?

1568
01:46:43,040 --> 01:46:45,040
probably

1569
01:46:45,480 --> 01:46:51,000
No, we went to her parents house when they they held the fucking intervention no, I wasn't there for that

1570
01:46:51,000 --> 01:46:53,800
I would have intervention for me and fucking Adam. I would have laughed

1571
01:46:55,400 --> 01:47:01,640
Fuck I don't remember who's I know Rebecca and Jaina were there they held an intervention for me and Adam and I was like

1572
01:47:01,880 --> 01:47:03,880
Yeah, you're right. I should probably stop drinking

1573
01:47:04,560 --> 01:47:05,960
um

1574
01:47:05,960 --> 01:47:10,880
That lasted for about a week and then I went on the drinking of the drugs even harder

1575
01:47:11,920 --> 01:47:16,500
And then I went up rehab two months later, but yeah, no, that was great. Great time

1576
01:47:16,920 --> 01:47:19,940
We had some slumber parties there before you went to rehab. Oh

1577
01:47:20,540 --> 01:47:24,820
We had some great that two months before I went to rehab

1578
01:47:25,520 --> 01:47:30,280
Wow, I slept on the floor in the hospital for like three days. Hey that yeah, you did baby

1579
01:47:30,280 --> 01:47:37,800
Yeah, Sean Oh slept on the floor in Samaritan Hospital until I went until they shipped me off to the mental hospital

1580
01:47:37,800 --> 01:47:40,440
And they said you know what you got to go to rehab. Oh

1581
01:47:41,320 --> 01:47:43,320
That's a good friend

1582
01:47:43,320 --> 01:47:47,880
Look about me a shot. Oh, we got we got a good relationship go ask him how he got there. I

1583
01:47:49,040 --> 01:47:53,600
Mean it's pretty apparent how he got there. No, so he was he was

1584
01:47:53,600 --> 01:48:00,920
He ended up in the hospital because he was on the phone talking a bunch of crazy shit. I

1585
01:48:01,680 --> 01:48:03,680
Tried I tried to Tony

1586
01:48:04,080 --> 01:48:09,800
And Tanya. No, no, I tried to blow my head off. I tried to blow my head off the gun jam

1587
01:48:10,160 --> 01:48:13,200
That didn't work. That's some defined intervention, dude

1588
01:48:13,320 --> 01:48:17,840
Yeah, so, you know, I ended up calling Curvin and I pretty much told

1589
01:48:18,240 --> 01:48:23,480
Yeah, I just tried to shoot myself and it didn't work, you know, like damn with you know

1590
01:48:23,480 --> 01:48:28,520
Some more words or whatever. So he called fucking Chrissy who then was like

1591
01:48:30,120 --> 01:48:36,800
You know like fucking Tony and Tanya show up in the ambulance, but they're like staged outside the area

1592
01:48:36,800 --> 01:48:39,160
I had to track his location and tell him where he was

1593
01:48:39,480 --> 01:48:45,920
So I'm out back behind my house smoking a cigarette and taking a piss mind of my own fucking business

1594
01:48:45,920 --> 01:48:52,720
Like man, that was close. I almost just killed myself and all sudden fucking 12 cops show up out of the woods

1595
01:48:52,720 --> 01:48:55,560
Are you Kyle? I was like no

1596
01:48:56,840 --> 01:48:58,840
No, who's Kyle?

1597
01:48:59,920 --> 01:49:06,560
My buddy drew sitting on the porch smoking cigarette. They're like, oh, that's it mortified. They're like, that's him

1598
01:49:06,560 --> 01:49:12,200
That's Kyle right there. So they grab and get start bringing them to the ambulance. I'm like, what are you doing with Drew?

1599
01:49:12,200 --> 01:49:17,400
And they're like so you're Kyle and I was like, no, I don't know any Kyle's

1600
01:49:17,400 --> 01:49:23,640
It's not the mall Gabriel shows up fucking Tony gets out and goes get in let's go

1601
01:49:23,640 --> 01:49:25,640
Oh, here we go

1602
01:49:34,920 --> 01:49:41,400
Beat them to the hospital. I was living to work. You got 941 by Anthony Nardone

1603
01:49:41,400 --> 01:49:46,800
They come they bring his fucking sticky badass Ellen fucking I'm

1604
01:49:47,360 --> 01:49:53,360
So dude, I'm so mad. I got fucking smoke blowing out of my ears. He fucking they lay him down the bed

1605
01:49:53,360 --> 01:49:57,360
He saw but I looked at him. I said you suck that bad at life. You couldn't fucking do

1606
01:50:00,120 --> 01:50:03,400
I was so I was so fucking mad and I'm

1607
01:50:03,920 --> 01:50:09,680
Demolished I'm fucking drunk off of so many fucking beers. I got heroin

1608
01:50:09,680 --> 01:50:13,400
I got heroin in my system cocaine to keep me going and I'm like

1609
01:50:14,040 --> 01:50:16,040
Yeah, I fucking suck. Sean. Oh

1610
01:50:18,800 --> 01:50:22,960
But he likes to stay stay in the hospital for like fucking three days straight and they

1611
01:50:23,480 --> 01:50:29,160
Him and John large drove me up to four wins. I stayed there for three days and they're like, yeah, you don't belong here

1612
01:50:29,160 --> 01:50:40,080
I mean I we transport him. I made him do his own PCR. I

1613
01:50:40,080 --> 01:50:46,720
Said I'm doing this so no, so so somebody else doesn't have to so you're comfortable. I said, but I'm not doing the fucking chart

1614
01:50:46,720 --> 01:50:54,720
I'm in the

1615
01:51:02,560 --> 01:51:08,320
They dropped me off there sent me to rehab and I spent 48 days of rehab that was great

1616
01:51:08,320 --> 01:51:16,840
Yeah, that picture on Facebook. It's me Coleman him Thompson and Rebecca and Kyle looks like a fucking beached whale

1617
01:51:27,040 --> 01:51:30,340
It was right before they shipped me off to fucking lockdown rehab

1618
01:51:31,440 --> 01:51:36,200
Well, we're glad you're here Kyle for to be our special guest on the podcast

1619
01:51:36,200 --> 01:51:39,840
Oh, absolutely. Did I ever tell you guys the stories about how I almost tried to kill myself?

1620
01:51:41,280 --> 01:51:43,280
Didn't you say you're like you?

1621
01:51:44,000 --> 01:51:48,640
Because you're like, I don't know you're on some I was on some like like experimental

1622
01:51:48,640 --> 01:51:54,840
It was some experimental like patch for ADHD and it made me super fucking like

1623
01:51:55,200 --> 01:52:00,840
Suicidal and I like it wasn't even like a it wasn't even like like I was like like, oh, I want to kill myself

1624
01:52:00,840 --> 01:52:04,060
It was like I made a list on what I had to do for that day

1625
01:52:04,060 --> 01:52:10,200
I'm like, all right, I gotta wake up take a shower brush my teeth hang myself make food

1626
01:52:18,840 --> 01:52:24,520
So I go to my closet and I fucking wrap a belt around my fucking neck and I hang it on the

1627
01:52:24,520 --> 01:52:30,040
I hang it on one of my like coat hanger like things and then I fucking try to hang myself

1628
01:52:30,040 --> 01:52:35,360
I kick the chair out and then immediately the fucking bar snaps and bonks me on the head

1629
01:52:35,360 --> 01:52:59,320
It bonks me right in the fucking head I fucking came to immediately like nice try to fucking hang myself

1630
01:52:59,320 --> 01:53:06,240
Also, I love the fact that I had things after hang myself

1631
01:53:06,240 --> 01:53:07,240
How old are you?

1632
01:53:07,240 --> 01:53:09,240
I was like 12

1633
01:53:09,480 --> 01:53:12,920
Like this was like but like it wasn't like I was like suicide

1634
01:53:12,920 --> 01:53:17,720
It was like the medication that I was on just was like, all right kill yourselves on the checklist whatever

1635
01:53:19,080 --> 01:53:21,480
But you know, I'm happy I didn't do it

1636
01:53:22,480 --> 01:53:24,760
I'd love to stick around until midnight

1637
01:53:24,760 --> 01:53:31,520
But I do I gotta wake up at 2 so fuck that damn. Yeah, I should probably go to bed

1638
01:53:31,520 --> 01:53:36,720
I gotta go to bed. I honestly just unlocked my phone and it was on this group chat and it connected me to the call

1639
01:53:38,840 --> 01:53:42,080
Look at the stories we just gave them Sean fuck a podcast cold

1640
01:53:42,080 --> 01:53:56,040
Yeah, thanks for being on Kyle and beep us yeah shot on Mac so I've been on for like 25 minutes

1641
01:53:56,040 --> 01:54:12,040
So do I get my buffalo chicken?

1642
01:54:12,040 --> 01:54:14,040
Buffalo chicken

1643
01:54:14,040 --> 01:54:16,040
Buffalo chicken

1644
01:54:16,040 --> 01:54:18,040
Buffalo chicken

1645
01:54:18,040 --> 01:54:20,040
Buffalo chicken

1646
01:54:20,040 --> 01:54:22,040
I was at the shop and save today

1647
01:54:22,040 --> 01:54:24,040
I'm really love Buffalo chicken

1648
01:54:24,040 --> 01:54:31,040
Yeah, speaking of shop and save wasn't the one by Central Station a shop and save and now it's a market 32

1649
01:54:31,040 --> 01:54:34,040
I thought it was a shop, right? Right? Shop, right? Right?

1650
01:54:34,040 --> 01:54:36,040
I went in there today

1651
01:54:37,040 --> 01:54:39,640
That place is so fucking hood now. Oh

1652
01:54:42,040 --> 01:54:44,040
It was always

1653
01:54:44,040 --> 01:54:46,040
Not this bad. It was

1654
01:54:48,040 --> 01:54:50,040
All the time to buy fucking yeah

1655
01:54:50,040 --> 01:54:59,040
It was it was always I do now remember it was not it was always I felt like I was gonna go there one time

1656
01:54:59,040 --> 01:55:02,800
We went to go to their clothes. So we had to go to one on fucking Delaware

1657
01:55:06,040 --> 01:55:10,040
That one sucks dude, we I remember the one time me and

1658
01:55:11,040 --> 01:55:17,040
Fucking I think it was alley Mac. We went to shop right there and we were making pancakes

1659
01:55:17,040 --> 01:55:23,240
So we went in and we were doing we were getting pancakes and then there's just a fucking dude walking around in a fucking diaper

1660
01:55:23,240 --> 01:55:28,240
Just a diaper walking around the alleys like the the aisles

1661
01:55:29,240 --> 01:55:34,400
With the shopping cart just doing regular shopping and I'm like we're just like what the fuck is going on there? God

1662
01:55:34,400 --> 01:55:38,240
It's like just random shit like that. There's like piss on the floor, you know

1663
01:55:39,240 --> 01:55:45,840
Now think of how many places there are like that across America just like right now like people doing that exact thing

1664
01:55:45,840 --> 01:55:51,240
Yeah, there's not gonna be many left by the time daddy. Trump is all done. Yeah, I hope so

1665
01:55:51,240 --> 01:55:54,400
He's gonna fucking clean. He's gonna clean up the store. He's doing a good job

1666
01:55:55,360 --> 01:55:57,360
Clean it up America

1667
01:55:57,520 --> 01:56:00,360
It's it's day in America again. Yeah, dude

1668
01:56:02,440 --> 01:56:06,160
Yeah, there's gonna be no more Darnell call it out from the deli

1669
01:56:08,640 --> 01:56:10,640
America's gonna be so good. You don't want to call out

1670
01:56:10,640 --> 01:56:15,840
You know, that was probably one of the funniest of all the prank phone calls the funniest one

1671
01:56:17,160 --> 01:56:19,160
Casey had that lady

1672
01:56:27,560 --> 01:56:29,560
What's your name he's like

1673
01:56:32,240 --> 01:56:35,960
She's like nobody works here with that name he goes yeah this price

1674
01:56:35,960 --> 01:56:37,960
Trumpa

1675
01:56:38,760 --> 01:56:40,760
Walmart he goes

1676
01:56:52,520 --> 01:56:54,520
This is Jerry from produce

1677
01:56:54,520 --> 01:57:02,900
My managers just a real B

1678
01:57:05,960 --> 01:57:07,960
Call one up right now

1679
01:57:13,320 --> 01:57:15,320
Yeah, this is Ted I'm calling out

1680
01:57:16,600 --> 01:57:20,480
You come up with a fake name. Let's do it. Come on Ted. No, you do it

1681
01:57:20,480 --> 01:57:25,880
No, I don't have my phone on me. You don't have your phone on you. I don't bring my phone with me anymore to work

1682
01:57:25,880 --> 01:57:30,920
Why do you got at work though to distracting? I leave it at home. I haven't been home yet. You haven't been home

1683
01:57:31,080 --> 01:57:36,060
No, no, it sucks use Casey's phone. Okay. I dial one up

1684
01:57:42,520 --> 01:57:48,760
It's the Kanye West Valentine's Day special we gotta do a prank call we haven't done a prank call and how long fucking like

1685
01:57:48,760 --> 01:57:50,760
62 episodes

1686
01:57:55,000 --> 01:57:58,440
Walmart and Honolulu do you still have it in your fucking

1687
01:58:04,400 --> 01:58:08,080
Fuck 808 wasn't 808 area code

1688
01:58:08,080 --> 01:58:17,120
I didn't even know that was an area like the 808 drum. Here we go. We're open daily from 6 a.m

1689
01:58:17,120 --> 01:58:22,320
To 11 p.m. This call in your voice may be recorded for business purposes including fraud prevention

1690
01:58:26,680 --> 01:58:31,120
Three for online pickup and delivery orders rest for for electronics

1691
01:58:31,920 --> 01:58:33,920
You know, we gotta go electronics

1692
01:58:33,920 --> 01:58:35,920
There you go, dude

1693
01:58:36,360 --> 01:58:38,920
All right, what do you want me to do? All right

1694
01:58:40,440 --> 01:58:42,440
I thought try by a PS2

1695
01:58:43,520 --> 01:58:45,520
No, I said

1696
01:58:46,160 --> 01:58:48,160
Up on you what the fuck

1697
01:58:49,120 --> 01:58:51,120
Why do you say this call is blocked?

1698
01:58:52,040 --> 01:58:54,580
Dude, what did you do? We call them too much?

1699
01:58:55,640 --> 01:58:59,120
Maybe like maybe the electronics department. I thought you were gonna call out. Oh

1700
01:58:59,120 --> 01:59:03,200
Yeah, let me say

1701
01:59:06,000 --> 01:59:10,840
Yeah, you gotta call out Casey I am way too gone for that

1702
01:59:13,480 --> 01:59:16,920
You guys it's gotta be done in the Don Juan voice, but you gotta be like

1703
01:59:16,920 --> 01:59:31,720
Hey, you'll this is big Mike. I don't have to call out

1704
01:59:34,600 --> 01:59:40,160
Provision Center press three for online pickup and delivery orders rest for for electronics

1705
01:59:40,160 --> 01:59:47,640
Press five for fresh bakery press six for fresh deli press seven for human resources press eight

1706
01:59:49,880 --> 01:59:54,200
Yeah fucking dog tell me how you want to quit your job at Walmart

1707
01:59:54,200 --> 02:00:03,960
Oh, you can't anonymously

1708
02:00:03,960 --> 02:00:11,800
Oh shit just regular then no apps on your phone that's a spoof number

1709
02:00:16,040 --> 02:00:22,120
And I don't really be feeling like working all these hours then I put on all these hours all the time

1710
02:00:23,760 --> 02:00:25,760
Who's not the shift tomorrow?

1711
02:00:28,440 --> 02:00:31,720
Yeah, I don't really like me talking to my bosses and shit

1712
02:00:31,720 --> 02:00:37,040
I'll be eating all the food anyway get you know that all the time

1713
02:00:37,040 --> 02:00:57,040
All right, we're calling GameStop

1714
02:01:07,880 --> 02:01:14,240
This is a Honolulu GameStop still open it's open till 9

1715
02:01:14,240 --> 02:01:21,040
Little dragon, I mean he'd be running around and shit and breathing

1716
02:01:24,320 --> 02:01:27,280
You remembered you from four years ago

1717
02:01:30,440 --> 02:01:32,440
I am not having a good time

1718
02:01:32,440 --> 02:01:34,440
I'm not having a good time

1719
02:01:34,440 --> 02:01:36,440
I'm not having a good time

1720
02:01:36,440 --> 02:01:38,440
I'm not having a good time

1721
02:01:38,440 --> 02:01:40,440
I'm not having a good time

1722
02:01:40,440 --> 02:01:42,440
I'm not having a good time

1723
02:01:42,440 --> 02:01:44,440
I am not having a shit today

1724
02:01:44,440 --> 02:01:46,440
I'm fucking done

1725
02:01:46,440 --> 02:01:48,440
I couldn't hear it

1726
02:01:50,440 --> 02:01:52,440
Dan's started talking and he just fucking hung up

1727
02:01:52,440 --> 02:01:54,440
He immediately

1728
02:01:54,440 --> 02:01:59,960
Dude, I-I think all the ones that we fucking called immediately know

1729
02:01:59,960 --> 02:02:03,960
There's like an artist depiction of me

1730
02:02:05,960 --> 02:02:08,960
Sounded like this guy licks

1731
02:02:09,960 --> 02:02:11,960
Immidiately

1732
02:02:11,960 --> 02:02:13,960
He's back

1733
02:02:13,960 --> 02:02:33,960
Let's take a break

1734
02:02:43,960 --> 02:02:53,960
We'll be back on Untitled Podcast

1735
02:03:03,160 --> 02:03:07,200
Welcome back to Untitled Podcast Episode 97

1736
02:03:09,360 --> 02:03:11,360
You know Tyler

1737
02:03:11,360 --> 02:03:14,360
Ali Max says that you were better at this song than Tar Hero

1738
02:03:14,360 --> 02:03:17,360
But I fucking was epic at this song than Tar Hero

1739
02:03:17,360 --> 02:03:18,360
This was the only song I could beat you at

1740
02:03:18,360 --> 02:03:19,360
I know you were good at it

1741
02:03:19,360 --> 02:03:21,360
But I was fucking good at it too

1742
02:03:21,360 --> 02:03:23,360
No, I think you did actually one time

1743
02:03:23,360 --> 02:03:27,360
I could beat you at this song, this was the one song that I was like better at

1744
02:03:27,360 --> 02:03:29,360
This song was fucking epic

1745
02:03:29,360 --> 02:03:33,360
And this song only became popular because of the Tar Hero

1746
02:03:33,360 --> 02:03:41,360
Yeah, so we're planning the episode 100 special

1747
02:03:41,360 --> 02:03:43,360
Haunted Hotel Madness

1748
02:03:43,360 --> 02:03:45,360
It's gonna be in Lake Placid

1749
02:03:45,360 --> 02:03:47,360
We're gonna investigate a haunted hotel

1750
02:03:47,360 --> 02:03:49,360
What the hell? Hotel Saranac?

1751
02:03:49,360 --> 02:03:51,360
Hotel Saranac

1752
02:03:51,360 --> 02:03:53,360
It's got a really cool sign too

1753
02:03:53,360 --> 02:03:55,360
That's where actually I got my header on Facebook from

1754
02:03:55,360 --> 02:03:56,360
I'll show you it

1755
02:03:56,360 --> 02:03:57,360
Are you sure it's haunted?

1756
02:03:57,360 --> 02:03:59,360
Yeah, dude I had a ghost experience there

1757
02:03:59,360 --> 02:04:01,360
No, I looked up some shit about it

1758
02:04:01,360 --> 02:04:04,360
It's actually considered the 8th most haunted hotel in the world

1759
02:04:04,360 --> 02:04:05,360
Jesus fucking Christ

1760
02:04:05,360 --> 02:04:11,360
Oh yeah, it was like these are the top haunted whatever hotels in America

1761
02:04:11,360 --> 02:04:13,360
And it was on that list

1762
02:04:13,360 --> 02:04:14,360
God damn it

1763
02:04:14,360 --> 02:04:17,360
I want to go to fucking Canada

1764
02:04:17,360 --> 02:04:20,360
And now we're going to the 8th most haunted

1765
02:04:20,360 --> 02:04:22,360
The 8th most haunted in the world

1766
02:04:22,360 --> 02:04:28,360
Actually I still got my passport so I can actually still go to Montreal after

1767
02:04:28,360 --> 02:04:29,360
Look at how spooky

1768
02:04:29,360 --> 02:04:31,360
Oh yeah right, it's not that far right?

1769
02:04:31,360 --> 02:04:32,360
Yeah

1770
02:04:32,360 --> 02:04:34,360
Jesus fuck, what's that called?

1771
02:04:34,360 --> 02:04:36,360
Hotel Saranac

1772
02:04:36,360 --> 02:04:37,360
God damn it

1773
02:04:37,360 --> 02:04:39,360
What's in the pit room?

1774
02:04:39,360 --> 02:04:41,360
It's me, that was me at Hotel Saranac

1775
02:04:41,360 --> 02:04:42,360
I'm gonna get an Airbnb

1776
02:04:42,360 --> 02:04:43,360
Oh, when did you go there?

1777
02:04:43,360 --> 02:04:45,360
Did you see anything at all?

1778
02:04:45,360 --> 02:04:47,360
I did, I did, so they had the main building

1779
02:04:47,360 --> 02:04:49,360
And then they have a new building that they built

1780
02:04:49,360 --> 02:04:51,360
And I was in the new building

1781
02:04:51,360 --> 02:04:53,360
AKA the spot that's supposed to be not haunted

1782
02:04:53,360 --> 02:04:55,360
The new building

1783
02:04:55,360 --> 02:04:57,360
And I shit you not, I was in the hotel

1784
02:04:57,360 --> 02:04:59,360
I was laying down

1785
02:04:59,360 --> 02:05:04,360
It was either for my wife's birthday or our anniversary

1786
02:05:04,360 --> 02:05:06,360
I know it was during the winter time

1787
02:05:06,360 --> 02:05:09,360
Actually let me check the date that I posted that

1788
02:05:09,360 --> 02:05:11,360
It was for her birthday

1789
02:05:11,360 --> 02:05:13,360
So we went to Lake Placid for her birthday

1790
02:05:13,360 --> 02:05:15,360
We stayed at Hotel Saranac

1791
02:05:15,360 --> 02:05:17,360
And um

1792
02:05:17,360 --> 02:05:19,360
Recently?

1793
02:05:19,360 --> 02:05:20,360
Did you hear that?

1794
02:05:20,360 --> 02:05:22,360
Yeah, what was that?

1795
02:05:22,360 --> 02:05:24,360
It sounded like someone was walking upstairs

1796
02:05:24,360 --> 02:05:26,360
It might have been a cat or something

1797
02:05:26,360 --> 02:05:28,360
Maybe

1798
02:05:28,360 --> 02:05:30,360
Me and her were staying there

1799
02:05:30,360 --> 02:05:32,360
And she was sleeping

1800
02:05:32,360 --> 02:05:34,360
I was up

1801
02:05:34,360 --> 02:05:36,360
Because I just had trouble sleeping

1802
02:05:36,360 --> 02:05:38,360
A lot of times

1803
02:05:38,360 --> 02:05:40,360
So I was sitting on the couch

1804
02:05:40,360 --> 02:05:42,360
Watching the Avengers or whatever

1805
02:05:42,360 --> 02:05:44,360
There was some Marvel movie playing on the TV

1806
02:05:44,360 --> 02:05:46,360
I don't remember which one

1807
02:05:46,360 --> 02:05:48,360
But I just remember Spider-Man being on the TV when this was going on

1808
02:05:48,360 --> 02:05:50,360
At the hotel?

1809
02:05:50,360 --> 02:05:52,360
So I'm sitting on the couch

1810
02:05:52,360 --> 02:05:54,360
I was in, I think my boxers

1811
02:05:54,360 --> 02:05:56,360
It was the two of us

1812
02:05:56,360 --> 02:05:58,360
And all of a sudden

1813
02:05:58,360 --> 02:06:00,360
In the corner I just see something move

1814
02:06:00,360 --> 02:06:02,360
And I'm like

1815
02:06:02,360 --> 02:06:04,360
So the room that I was staying in

1816
02:06:04,360 --> 02:06:06,360
It was

1817
02:06:06,360 --> 02:06:08,360
A king sized bed

1818
02:06:08,360 --> 02:06:10,360
And it had a separate room

1819
02:06:10,360 --> 02:06:12,360
With a shower and it had a couch

1820
02:06:12,360 --> 02:06:14,360
The TV

1821
02:06:14,360 --> 02:06:16,360
And then it kind of angled off to the door

1822
02:06:16,360 --> 02:06:18,360
So I'm on the couch

1823
02:06:18,360 --> 02:06:20,360
Closest to the bed

1824
02:06:20,360 --> 02:06:22,360
Kind of just sitting there

1825
02:06:22,360 --> 02:06:24,360
And I'm like whatever

1826
02:06:24,360 --> 02:06:26,360
I'm just having trouble sleeping

1827
02:06:26,360 --> 02:06:28,360
Because I've always had trouble sleeping

1828
02:06:28,360 --> 02:06:30,360
So I'm sitting there

1829
02:06:30,360 --> 02:06:32,360
And then I just see something move in the fucking

1830
02:06:32,360 --> 02:06:34,360
Like the corner by the door

1831
02:06:34,360 --> 02:06:36,360
And I kind of turn my head over

1832
02:06:36,360 --> 02:06:38,360
And I just see a fucking figure of this guy

1833
02:06:38,360 --> 02:06:40,360
Like a fucking black shadow guy

1834
02:06:40,360 --> 02:06:42,360
Just standing there

1835
02:06:42,360 --> 02:06:44,360
And I'm like

1836
02:06:44,360 --> 02:06:46,360
What the fuck is that?

1837
02:06:46,360 --> 02:06:48,360
And it was standing there

1838
02:06:48,360 --> 02:06:50,360
And my wife rolls over and opens her eyes

1839
02:06:50,360 --> 02:06:52,360
And goes, you see that too right?

1840
02:06:52,360 --> 02:06:54,360
I'm like, yeah

1841
02:06:54,360 --> 02:06:56,360
And then I turn on my light

1842
02:06:56,360 --> 02:06:58,360
And it didn't move when I moved

1843
02:06:58,360 --> 02:07:00,360
So it wasn't my shadow

1844
02:07:00,360 --> 02:07:02,360
Because I was standing up at this point

1845
02:07:02,360 --> 02:07:04,360
Looking at it

1846
02:07:04,360 --> 02:07:06,360
And I'm about 5'10

1847
02:07:06,360 --> 02:07:08,360
5'11 area

1848
02:07:08,360 --> 02:07:10,360
It was taller than me

1849
02:07:10,360 --> 02:07:12,360
And I was kind of looking at this shadow thing

1850
02:07:12,360 --> 02:07:14,360
And then she turned on the light

1851
02:07:14,360 --> 02:07:16,360
And as soon as she turned on the light it went away

1852
02:07:16,360 --> 02:07:18,360
What the fuck dude

1853
02:07:18,360 --> 02:07:20,360
What the fuck is that about?

1854
02:07:20,360 --> 02:07:22,360
Dude those fucking shadow people

1855
02:07:22,360 --> 02:07:24,360
That's real shit

1856
02:07:24,360 --> 02:07:26,360
Dan are you scared to go into this haunted place?

1857
02:07:26,360 --> 02:07:28,360
Oh I just don't

1858
02:07:28,360 --> 02:07:30,360
I don't want to bring anything fucking home

1859
02:07:30,360 --> 02:07:32,360
You won't bring anything home

1860
02:07:32,360 --> 02:07:34,360
You have to

1861
02:07:34,360 --> 02:07:36,360
You have to provoke it

1862
02:07:36,360 --> 02:07:38,360
And like fucking chastise it

1863
02:07:38,360 --> 02:07:40,360
I'm fucking hanging on by it as fun as it is

1864
02:07:40,360 --> 02:07:42,360
I don't need demons around me

1865
02:07:42,360 --> 02:07:44,360
God damn it

1866
02:07:44,360 --> 02:07:46,360
Don't you want to know that there's something out there?

1867
02:07:46,360 --> 02:07:48,360
I know

1868
02:07:48,360 --> 02:07:50,360
I know there's something out there

1869
02:07:50,360 --> 02:07:52,360
I want actual fucking proof

1870
02:07:52,360 --> 02:07:54,360
That there's something out there

1871
02:07:54,360 --> 02:07:56,360
I'll bring some, I'll go something gear

1872
02:07:56,360 --> 02:07:58,360
We'll have a little live session

1873
02:07:58,360 --> 02:08:00,360
So like

1874
02:08:00,360 --> 02:08:02,360
Three problems with this

1875
02:08:02,360 --> 02:08:04,360
Trip

1876
02:08:04,360 --> 02:08:06,360
The first one was what we were talking about

1877
02:08:06,360 --> 02:08:08,360
Is I fucking

1878
02:08:08,360 --> 02:08:10,360
Get car sick now

1879
02:08:10,360 --> 02:08:12,360
I usually drive

1880
02:08:12,360 --> 02:08:14,360
But there's all these mics that we have to bring

1881
02:08:14,360 --> 02:08:16,360
And so how

1882
02:08:16,360 --> 02:08:18,360
Would we fit that in the car?

1883
02:08:18,360 --> 02:08:20,360
We can put it in the trunk

1884
02:08:20,360 --> 02:08:22,360
How are we going to fit it in the car they fold up?

1885
02:08:22,360 --> 02:08:24,360
You can put it in a trunk

1886
02:08:24,360 --> 02:08:26,360
The same way you got them to my house

1887
02:08:26,360 --> 02:08:28,360
You're right

1888
02:08:28,360 --> 02:08:30,360
I know I'm right

1889
02:08:30,360 --> 02:08:32,360
Second thing is

1890
02:08:32,360 --> 02:08:34,360
You know that shooting that was in Las Vegas

1891
02:08:34,360 --> 02:08:36,360
What did that guy do?

1892
02:08:36,360 --> 02:08:38,360
He brought a bunch of fucking bags

1893
02:08:38,360 --> 02:08:40,360
Into the hotel and brought them upstairs

1894
02:08:40,360 --> 02:08:42,360
And there's like fucking

1895
02:08:42,360 --> 02:08:44,360
Four guys carrying a bunch of fucking duffel bags upstairs

1896
02:08:44,360 --> 02:08:46,360
They're going to be like what the fuck

1897
02:08:46,360 --> 02:08:48,360
Does it overlook a Jason Aldean concert?

1898
02:08:48,360 --> 02:08:50,360
I don't think so

1899
02:08:50,360 --> 02:08:52,360
It overlooks a lake

1900
02:08:52,360 --> 02:08:54,360
In the middle of fucking August, in the middle of March

1901
02:08:54,360 --> 02:08:56,360
Right

1902
02:08:56,360 --> 02:08:58,360
Alright no you're right

1903
02:08:58,360 --> 02:09:00,360
But the third thing is

1904
02:09:00,360 --> 02:09:02,360
So this episode 100

1905
02:09:02,360 --> 02:09:04,360
Is likely going to get

1906
02:09:04,360 --> 02:09:06,360
Pretty rowdy

1907
02:09:06,360 --> 02:09:08,360
We'll get a fucking noise complaint on us

1908
02:09:08,360 --> 02:09:10,360
In the room

1909
02:09:10,360 --> 02:09:12,360
When we went up and we went off

1910
02:09:12,360 --> 02:09:14,360
Because it's technically quote unquote the off season

1911
02:09:14,360 --> 02:09:16,360
Even though it's still open

1912
02:09:16,360 --> 02:09:18,360
There's barely anybody there

1913
02:09:18,360 --> 02:09:20,360
Who wants to go to fucking Lake Placid in March?

1914
02:09:20,360 --> 02:09:22,360
This is just a normal hotel

1915
02:09:22,360 --> 02:09:24,360
People go to?

1916
02:09:24,360 --> 02:09:26,360
So you can just pull in and not know it's haunted

1917
02:09:26,360 --> 02:09:28,360
Yeah

1918
02:09:28,360 --> 02:09:30,360
It's a normal hotel

1919
02:09:30,360 --> 02:09:32,360
It's not like

1920
02:09:32,360 --> 02:09:34,360
Just for haunted exploration

1921
02:09:34,360 --> 02:09:36,360
No it's an actual hotel

1922
02:09:36,360 --> 02:09:38,360
I want to rent the most haunted room though

1923
02:09:38,360 --> 02:09:40,360
I want to talk to them about that

1924
02:09:40,360 --> 02:09:42,360
If we say hey

1925
02:09:42,360 --> 02:09:44,360
We have a

1926
02:09:44,360 --> 02:09:46,360
Do you know what room it is?

1927
02:09:46,360 --> 02:09:48,360
No that's why we'd have to call them

1928
02:09:48,360 --> 02:09:50,360
Be like hey we run a podcast

1929
02:09:50,360 --> 02:09:52,360
I think I was looking that up

1930
02:09:54,360 --> 02:09:56,360
Hey we run a podcast

1931
02:09:56,360 --> 02:09:58,360
Like we want to have our 100th

1932
02:09:58,360 --> 02:10:00,360
Episode here blah blah blah

1933
02:10:00,360 --> 02:10:02,360
Like type thing

1934
02:10:02,360 --> 02:10:04,360
And we want to see

1935
02:10:04,360 --> 02:10:06,360
They have a meeting room

1936
02:10:06,360 --> 02:10:08,360
There and if we talk to them

1937
02:10:08,360 --> 02:10:10,360
And see if we can do that

1938
02:10:10,360 --> 02:10:12,360
They could

1939
02:10:12,360 --> 02:10:14,360
You know see if we can get

1940
02:10:14,360 --> 02:10:16,360
The meeting room like that we could use that

1941
02:10:16,360 --> 02:10:18,360
For the episode

1942
02:10:18,360 --> 02:10:20,360
The 100 year old building

1943
02:10:20,360 --> 02:10:22,360
In upstate New York has officially been named

1944
02:10:22,360 --> 02:10:24,360
The 20th most haunted

1945
02:10:24,360 --> 02:10:26,360
Hotel in the country

1946
02:10:26,360 --> 02:10:28,360
That's not as bad as the 8th in the world

1947
02:10:28,360 --> 02:10:30,360
Like 8th in the world

1948
02:10:30,360 --> 02:10:32,360
It's like what the fuck is this

1949
02:10:32,360 --> 02:10:34,360
Is this a portable house

1950
02:10:34,360 --> 02:10:36,360
I mean 20th in the country is still bad

1951
02:10:36,360 --> 02:10:38,360
I know there's like so many haunted

1952
02:10:38,360 --> 02:10:40,360
That's pretty low dude

1953
02:10:40,360 --> 02:10:42,360
If you're like 20th in the country

1954
02:10:42,360 --> 02:10:44,360
At something that would be like not that fucking great

1955
02:10:44,360 --> 02:10:46,360
Like if you're like oh I'm 20th

1956
02:10:46,360 --> 02:10:48,360
Think of how many hotels there are

1957
02:10:48,360 --> 02:10:50,360
There's probably hundreds of thousands

1958
02:10:50,360 --> 02:10:52,360
Dude I was number one in the world

1959
02:10:52,360 --> 02:10:54,360
On that challenge in flight simulator

1960
02:10:54,360 --> 02:10:56,360
Yeah that's because you were actually number one in the world

1961
02:10:56,360 --> 02:10:58,360
Right was it

1962
02:10:58,360 --> 02:11:00,360
What the fuck was that

1963
02:11:00,360 --> 02:11:02,360
It was a ghost

1964
02:11:02,360 --> 02:11:04,360
See it would be so fucking cool

1965
02:11:04,360 --> 02:11:06,360
To be like doing the podcast

1966
02:11:08,360 --> 02:11:10,360
Something is moving up there

1967
02:11:10,360 --> 02:11:12,360
It's just my cat

1968
02:11:12,360 --> 02:11:14,360
Nah dude that doesn't sound like a cat

1969
02:11:14,360 --> 02:11:16,360
That was too heavy for a cat

1970
02:11:16,360 --> 02:11:18,360
That's my girlfriend

1971
02:11:18,360 --> 02:11:20,360
Wouldn't it be cool to just be fucking doing the podcast

1972
02:11:20,360 --> 02:11:22,360
And some fucking ghost shit happens

1973
02:11:22,360 --> 02:11:24,360
Something ghost just happened

1974
02:11:24,360 --> 02:11:26,360
That would be fucking awesome

1975
02:11:26,360 --> 02:11:28,360
Yeah but we're not in a

1976
02:11:28,360 --> 02:11:30,360
Okay I heard that

1977
02:11:30,360 --> 02:11:32,360
What the fuck is that

1978
02:11:32,360 --> 02:11:34,360
I don't know

1979
02:11:36,360 --> 02:11:38,360
No I mean there's

1980
02:11:38,360 --> 02:11:40,360
There's people

1981
02:11:40,360 --> 02:11:42,360
I heard someone talking

1982
02:11:42,360 --> 02:11:44,360
Let's go upstairs real quick

1983
02:11:44,360 --> 02:11:46,360
I'm going upstairs real quick

1984
02:11:46,360 --> 02:11:48,360
Tyler's going upstairs

1985
02:11:48,360 --> 02:11:50,360
He's going to find my fucking cat

1986
02:11:50,360 --> 02:11:54,360
What the fuck was that

1987
02:11:56,360 --> 02:11:58,360
It's probably

1988
02:11:58,360 --> 02:12:00,360
My fucking cat does weird shit

1989
02:12:00,360 --> 02:12:02,360
My cat fucking jumps on the counters

1990
02:12:02,360 --> 02:12:04,360
Jumps on the fucking bathroom

1991
02:12:04,360 --> 02:12:06,360
Window sill

1992
02:12:06,360 --> 02:12:08,360
All the time

1993
02:12:14,360 --> 02:12:16,360
Did you find anything

1994
02:12:16,360 --> 02:12:18,360
No

1995
02:12:18,360 --> 02:12:20,360
No

1996
02:12:20,360 --> 02:12:22,360
Your cat was just sleeping

1997
02:12:22,360 --> 02:12:24,360
In it's fucking little basket thing

1998
02:12:24,360 --> 02:12:26,360
Oh

1999
02:12:26,360 --> 02:12:28,360
Well there has been a lot of break ins and cars

2000
02:12:28,360 --> 02:12:30,360
In this area lately

2001
02:12:30,360 --> 02:12:32,360
Oh shit make sure mine's locked

2002
02:12:32,360 --> 02:12:34,360
Mine is locked

2003
02:12:34,360 --> 02:12:36,360
Last week

2004
02:12:36,360 --> 02:12:38,360
Yeah like

2005
02:12:38,360 --> 02:12:40,360
I'll bring some of my ghost stuff with me

2006
02:12:40,360 --> 02:12:42,360
When we go

2007
02:12:42,360 --> 02:12:44,360
What do we think of the 20th

2008
02:12:44,360 --> 02:12:46,360
Yeah

2009
02:12:46,360 --> 02:12:48,360
So fucking miracle

2010
02:12:48,360 --> 02:12:50,360
On ice

2011
02:12:50,360 --> 02:12:52,360
What does that fall on

2012
02:12:52,360 --> 02:12:54,360
What day of the week

2013
02:12:54,360 --> 02:12:56,360
Thursday

2014
02:12:56,360 --> 02:12:58,360
I gotta take it off

2015
02:12:58,360 --> 02:13:00,360
And then we'd come back Friday morning

2016
02:13:00,360 --> 02:13:02,360
Unless you want to go to Montreal after

2017
02:13:02,360 --> 02:13:04,360
How far away is it

2018
02:13:04,360 --> 02:13:06,360
From Montreal

2019
02:13:06,360 --> 02:13:08,360
I think it's still like 3 hours away from

2020
02:13:08,360 --> 02:13:10,360
Lake Placid

2021
02:13:10,360 --> 02:13:12,360
No

2022
02:13:12,360 --> 02:13:14,360
It's close to Lake Placid

2023
02:13:14,360 --> 02:13:16,360
Dude that is up there boy

2024
02:13:18,360 --> 02:13:20,360
I think Hotel Saranac is

2025
02:13:20,360 --> 02:13:22,360
I think 3 hours away

2026
02:13:24,360 --> 02:13:26,360
It's 2 hours 15 minutes

2027
02:13:26,360 --> 02:13:28,360
From Hotel Saranac

2028
02:13:28,360 --> 02:13:30,360
Yeah

2029
02:13:30,360 --> 02:13:32,360
Wow it's still far huh

2030
02:13:32,360 --> 02:13:34,360
Yep

2031
02:13:34,360 --> 02:13:36,360
How far is Toronto

2032
02:13:36,360 --> 02:13:38,360
6 hours

2033
02:13:38,360 --> 02:13:40,360
6 hours from here

2034
02:13:40,360 --> 02:13:42,360
Dude it's fucking crazy that people even fucking live up there

2035
02:13:42,360 --> 02:13:44,360
It's like what the fuck are you guys doing up there

2036
02:13:44,360 --> 02:13:46,360
It's fucking

2037
02:13:46,360 --> 02:13:48,360
That's fucking southern Canada

2038
02:13:48,360 --> 02:13:50,360
Imagine like northern Canada

2039
02:13:50,360 --> 02:13:52,360
The zip

2040
02:13:54,360 --> 02:13:56,360
The area code for it's still 518 though

2041
02:13:56,360 --> 02:13:58,360
Up there

2042
02:13:58,360 --> 02:14:00,360
Is it

2043
02:14:00,360 --> 02:14:02,360
Yeah I just looked it up

2044
02:14:02,360 --> 02:14:04,360
518 goes that fucking far

2045
02:14:04,360 --> 02:14:06,360
To the border yeah

2046
02:14:06,360 --> 02:14:08,360
No shit

2047
02:14:08,360 --> 02:14:10,360
But yeah it looks

2048
02:14:10,360 --> 02:14:12,360
It's an old hotel it looks really nice

2049
02:14:12,360 --> 02:14:14,360
The rooms are nice

2050
02:14:14,360 --> 02:14:16,360
It's technically a Hilton too

2051
02:14:16,360 --> 02:14:18,360
Damn

2052
02:14:18,360 --> 02:14:20,360
But yeah it's a nice hotel

2053
02:14:20,360 --> 02:14:22,360
Barely anybody

2054
02:14:22,360 --> 02:14:24,360
Will be there cause March nobody really goes

2055
02:14:24,360 --> 02:14:26,360
Like you know late winter

2056
02:14:26,360 --> 02:14:28,360
Early spring like that's kind of like a dead time

2057
02:14:28,360 --> 02:14:30,360
So

2058
02:14:30,360 --> 02:14:32,360
When me and Emily went it was

2059
02:14:32,360 --> 02:14:34,360
December which I'd figure

2060
02:14:34,360 --> 02:14:36,360
If people would want to go to Lake Placid for December

2061
02:14:36,360 --> 02:14:38,360
We were the only people in the entire hotel

2062
02:14:38,360 --> 02:14:40,360
At that time

2063
02:14:40,360 --> 02:14:42,360
So we could like investigate the other

2064
02:14:42,360 --> 02:14:44,360
Parts of the hotel

2065
02:14:44,360 --> 02:14:46,360
I think that we really should talk to the

2066
02:14:46,360 --> 02:14:48,360
Like the staff there and see if we can do that

2067
02:14:48,360 --> 02:14:50,360
Cause if we can that'd be fucking really cool

2068
02:14:50,360 --> 02:14:52,360
Well that will

2069
02:14:52,360 --> 02:14:54,360
That'll be your responsibility

2070
02:14:54,360 --> 02:14:56,360
Talk to the staff

2071
02:14:56,360 --> 02:14:58,360
Yes yes

2072
02:14:58,360 --> 02:15:00,360
Alright we'll do it

2073
02:15:00,360 --> 02:15:02,360
Fuck yeah maybe get access to the fucking

2074
02:15:02,360 --> 02:15:04,360
You know spooky shit

2075
02:15:04,360 --> 02:15:06,360
I'll talk to them

2076
02:15:06,360 --> 02:15:08,360
See what we can do

2077
02:15:08,360 --> 02:15:10,360
I think Dan's still afraid

2078
02:15:10,360 --> 02:15:12,360
I'm gonna be like are there any

2079
02:15:12,360 --> 02:15:14,360
Airbnbs nearby

2080
02:15:14,360 --> 02:15:16,360
We can do the podcast there

2081
02:15:16,360 --> 02:15:18,360
And I'm gonna sleep at a different airbnb

2082
02:15:18,360 --> 02:15:20,360
Dan you said

2083
02:15:20,360 --> 02:15:22,360
I'll sleep in a room alone

2084
02:15:22,360 --> 02:15:24,360
I'll sleep by myself in a haunted room

2085
02:15:24,360 --> 02:15:26,360
Damn I'm gonna take a video

2086
02:15:26,360 --> 02:15:28,360
I don't want to sleep by myself in a haunted room

2087
02:15:28,360 --> 02:15:30,360
You and I can have a room

2088
02:15:30,360 --> 02:15:32,360
And I'll take the haunted room

2089
02:15:32,360 --> 02:15:34,360
No it'd be two rooms

2090
02:15:34,360 --> 02:15:36,360
Two in each room

2091
02:15:36,360 --> 02:15:38,360
No but that's what I'm saying if he takes

2092
02:15:38,360 --> 02:15:40,360
If he does an airbnb and doesn't stay in the hotel

2093
02:15:40,360 --> 02:15:42,360
Oh no he has to stay in the hotel

2094
02:15:42,360 --> 02:15:44,360
I'll stay in the haunted one

2095
02:15:44,360 --> 02:15:46,360
So who would stay in the haunted room with me

2096
02:15:46,360 --> 02:15:48,360
No Dan's fucking staying in the haunted room

2097
02:15:48,360 --> 02:15:50,360
Fuck no dude

2098
02:15:50,360 --> 02:15:52,360
I'll put my earbuds in and just

2099
02:15:52,360 --> 02:15:54,360
Fucking listen to like peaceful music

2100
02:15:54,360 --> 02:15:56,360
And I'll just be fucking like a seance

2101
02:15:56,360 --> 02:15:58,360
I'm gonna get fucking attacked just for like bringing so much

2102
02:15:58,360 --> 02:16:00,360
Like fucking peace and shit

2103
02:16:00,360 --> 02:16:02,360
I'll just be doing like a seance in the corner

2104
02:16:02,360 --> 02:16:04,360
Oh god

2105
02:16:04,360 --> 02:16:06,360
Yeah it'd be like two in two

2106
02:16:06,360 --> 02:16:08,360
And then uh you know

2107
02:16:08,360 --> 02:16:10,360
We'd both be in haunted rooms

2108
02:16:10,360 --> 02:16:12,360
Damn

2109
02:16:12,360 --> 02:16:14,360
I'd do it that sounds fun

2110
02:16:14,360 --> 02:16:16,360
Dan you were saying earlier in the chat

2111
02:16:16,360 --> 02:16:18,360
I have something to say to you

2112
02:16:18,360 --> 02:16:20,360
We were talking about like

2113
02:16:20,360 --> 02:16:22,360
Elon Musk or some shit

2114
02:16:22,360 --> 02:16:24,360
Yeah yeah I got

2115
02:16:24,360 --> 02:16:26,360
I got something to say to fucking you

2116
02:16:26,360 --> 02:16:28,360
Alright you're saying that uh

2117
02:16:28,360 --> 02:16:30,360
If you invested

2118
02:16:30,360 --> 02:16:32,360
A portion of your income

2119
02:16:32,360 --> 02:16:34,360
Or you invested your income over

2120
02:16:34,360 --> 02:16:36,360
50 years in congress

2121
02:16:36,360 --> 02:16:38,360
Right if you made 200 grand a year

2122
02:16:38,360 --> 02:16:40,360
Right you made 200 grand

2123
02:16:40,360 --> 02:16:42,360
Over 50 years you say it would be close to

2124
02:16:42,360 --> 02:16:44,360
100 million dollars

2125
02:16:44,360 --> 02:16:46,360
Oh I'm serious

2126
02:16:46,360 --> 02:16:48,360
That's bullshit

2127
02:16:48,360 --> 02:16:50,360
No that's 12 million dollars

2128
02:16:50,360 --> 02:16:52,360
Bullshit you would only have to invest half and it would be about 100 million dollars

2129
02:16:52,360 --> 02:16:54,360
You're exactly right

2130
02:16:54,360 --> 02:16:56,360
And it's over the course of like 60

2131
02:16:56,360 --> 02:16:58,360
60 years

2132
02:16:58,360 --> 02:17:00,360
Right you're exactly right

2133
02:17:00,360 --> 02:17:02,360
And that doesn't account for generational wealth

2134
02:17:02,360 --> 02:17:04,360
So if they were handed down money

2135
02:17:04,360 --> 02:17:06,360
Which they probably were because those are the only people

2136
02:17:06,360 --> 02:17:08,360
Who can afford to get into politics

2137
02:17:08,360 --> 02:17:10,360
And do you see how much

2138
02:17:10,360 --> 02:17:12,360
The last 20 years

2139
02:17:12,360 --> 02:17:14,360
If you invested even 100,000 in them

2140
02:17:14,360 --> 02:17:16,360
Back then you'd have 100 million

2141
02:17:16,360 --> 02:17:18,360
Dollars today

2142
02:17:18,360 --> 02:17:20,360
Yeah that's exactly true

2143
02:17:20,360 --> 02:17:22,360
And then I see fucking Elon

2144
02:17:22,360 --> 02:17:24,360
Is fucking you know

2145
02:17:24,360 --> 02:17:26,360
Being like oh the fucking

2146
02:17:26,360 --> 02:17:28,360
The senators are paid too much

2147
02:17:28,360 --> 02:17:30,360
And why does this person have 95 million

2148
02:17:30,360 --> 02:17:32,360
Dollars

2149
02:17:32,360 --> 02:17:34,360
It's like bitch you're like running a

2150
02:17:34,360 --> 02:17:36,360
Department of the government and you're the richest

2151
02:17:36,360 --> 02:17:38,360
Person in the world

2152
02:17:38,360 --> 02:17:40,360
It's like I mean so

2153
02:17:40,360 --> 02:17:42,360
Elon steps out of his lane sometimes

2154
02:17:42,360 --> 02:17:44,360
But he is doing a lot of good shit

2155
02:17:44,360 --> 02:17:46,360
Like you need somebody like him

2156
02:17:46,360 --> 02:17:48,360
To come in and just fucking clean up dude

2157
02:17:48,360 --> 02:17:50,360
Because have you heard about this

2158
02:17:50,360 --> 02:17:52,360
All this USAID stuff

2159
02:17:52,360 --> 02:17:54,360
What specifically?

2160
02:17:54,360 --> 02:17:56,360
USAID

2161
02:17:56,360 --> 02:17:58,360
Or USAID

2162
02:17:58,360 --> 02:18:00,360
However you want to say it

2163
02:18:00,360 --> 02:18:02,360
It's basically just

2164
02:18:02,360 --> 02:18:04,360
It's a way for the CIA

2165
02:18:04,360 --> 02:18:06,360
To send money

2166
02:18:06,360 --> 02:18:08,360
Like when they don't want to do it overtly

2167
02:18:08,360 --> 02:18:10,360
They do it covertly through USAID

2168
02:18:10,360 --> 02:18:12,360
So

2169
02:18:12,360 --> 02:18:14,360
It's like basically like

2170
02:18:14,360 --> 02:18:16,360
It's like a money laundering scheme for the

2171
02:18:16,360 --> 02:18:18,360
Deep state

2172
02:18:18,360 --> 02:18:20,360
That's what they're saying

2173
02:18:20,360 --> 02:18:22,360
I don't know dude you need somebody

2174
02:18:22,360 --> 02:18:24,360
Like him to come in and fucking clean up

2175
02:18:24,360 --> 02:18:26,360
But I will say he steps outside of his lane sometimes

2176
02:18:26,360 --> 02:18:28,360
He does it a lot, he does it a little too much

2177
02:18:28,360 --> 02:18:30,360
But he's also

2178
02:18:30,360 --> 02:18:32,360
Fucking fixing things so

2179
02:18:32,360 --> 02:18:34,360
And this isn't

2180
02:18:34,360 --> 02:18:36,360
We act like this

2181
02:18:36,360 --> 02:18:38,360
There's this quote that says

2182
02:18:38,360 --> 02:18:40,360
The things happening today are the same things that happened to

2183
02:18:40,360 --> 02:18:42,360
People, different people 20 years ago

2184
02:18:42,360 --> 02:18:44,360
Like this is

2185
02:18:44,360 --> 02:18:46,360
Nothing new dude

2186
02:18:46,360 --> 02:18:48,360
Reagan had the grace commission

2187
02:18:48,360 --> 02:18:50,360
Which was exactly what Doge is

2188
02:18:50,360 --> 02:18:52,360
Alright so we're acting like this is like

2189
02:18:52,360 --> 02:18:54,360
A new idea, what happens is like

2190
02:18:54,360 --> 02:18:56,360
Liberals come in, they have no idea how

2191
02:18:56,360 --> 02:18:58,360
Fucking money works okay

2192
02:18:58,360 --> 02:19:00,360
This isn't like a Republican vs. Democrat

2193
02:19:00,360 --> 02:19:02,360
Thing, like Republicans don't

2194
02:19:02,360 --> 02:19:04,360
Know how gun control works, they don't get it

2195
02:19:04,360 --> 02:19:06,360
They think it's like somebody trying to infringe on the rights

2196
02:19:06,360 --> 02:19:08,360
It's like no dude we don't want that weird

2197
02:19:08,360 --> 02:19:10,360
Kid in the back of the classroom going into Walmart

2198
02:19:10,360 --> 02:19:12,360
And getting a gun and killing everybody here

2199
02:19:12,360 --> 02:19:14,360
That's not gun control, that's

2200
02:19:14,360 --> 02:19:16,360
Psychopath control

2201
02:19:16,360 --> 02:19:18,360
So you know

2202
02:19:18,360 --> 02:19:20,360
Each side has their things that they're terrible at

2203
02:19:20,360 --> 02:19:22,360
And things that they're good at right

2204
02:19:22,360 --> 02:19:24,360
The left is really good at the arts and shit like that

2205
02:19:24,360 --> 02:19:26,360
Republicans are really good at managing money

2206
02:19:26,360 --> 02:19:28,360
They're really good at law and order

2207
02:19:28,360 --> 02:19:30,360
You need the creativity of one side

2208
02:19:30,360 --> 02:19:32,360
And you need the law and order of the other

2209
02:19:32,360 --> 02:19:34,360
Law and order yes

2210
02:19:34,360 --> 02:19:36,360
Fucking money is a different story

2211
02:19:36,360 --> 02:19:38,360
Like the economy

2212
02:19:38,360 --> 02:19:40,360
Dude they just get it, they just fucking understand

2213
02:19:40,360 --> 02:19:42,360
Like what money, like what needs to happen

2214
02:19:42,360 --> 02:19:44,360
Like

2215
02:19:44,360 --> 02:19:46,360
Elon Musk is a Republican

2216
02:19:46,360 --> 02:19:48,360
Obviously Elon is you know

2217
02:19:48,360 --> 02:19:50,360
Good with money, if he's going to make

2218
02:19:50,360 --> 02:19:52,360
You know 400 billion dollars

2219
02:19:52,360 --> 02:19:54,360
But there has to be

2220
02:19:54,360 --> 02:19:56,360
A certain level of greed when you're the

2221
02:19:56,360 --> 02:19:58,360
Richest person in the world

2222
02:19:58,360 --> 02:20:00,360
I don't think it's greed dude, I think actually it is a type

2223
02:20:00,360 --> 02:20:02,360
Of greed, he really

2224
02:20:02,360 --> 02:20:04,360
Doesn't give a fuck about

2225
02:20:04,360 --> 02:20:06,360
Anything but getting to Mars, and I think he

2226
02:20:06,360 --> 02:20:08,360
Really wants to see that happen in his lifetime

2227
02:20:08,360 --> 02:20:10,360
So when you see something

2228
02:20:10,360 --> 02:20:12,360
Getting in the way of that, like he's like

2229
02:20:12,360 --> 02:20:14,360
Oh these fucking liberals

2230
02:20:14,360 --> 02:20:16,360
They just, they over regulate

2231
02:20:16,360 --> 02:20:18,360
Everything to the point that

2232
02:20:18,360 --> 02:20:20,360
Dude he said it got to the point

2233
02:20:20,360 --> 02:20:22,360
Where he was getting

2234
02:20:22,360 --> 02:20:24,360
Sued because he

2235
02:20:24,360 --> 02:20:26,360
Wasn't hiring enough people who were

2236
02:20:26,360 --> 02:20:28,360
Minorities by one branch of the government

2237
02:20:28,360 --> 02:20:30,360
And then the other branch of the government was suing

2238
02:20:30,360 --> 02:20:32,360
Him because he wasn't allowed

2239
02:20:32,360 --> 02:20:34,360
To hire people that weren't natural born citizens

2240
02:20:34,360 --> 02:20:36,360
Right so

2241
02:20:36,360 --> 02:20:38,360
Two branches of the government

2242
02:20:38,360 --> 02:20:40,360
Were suing him for laws

2243
02:20:40,360 --> 02:20:42,360
That overlapped, that contradicted

2244
02:20:42,360 --> 02:20:44,360
Each other, and it's just like

2245
02:20:44,360 --> 02:20:46,360
Insane, and there's so many

2246
02:20:46,360 --> 02:20:48,360
Laws in the United States that people

2247
02:20:48,360 --> 02:20:50,360
Can't get anything done because

2248
02:20:50,360 --> 02:20:52,360
All these lawmakers do is make

2249
02:20:52,360 --> 02:20:54,360
Fucking laws, there's no way

2250
02:20:54,360 --> 02:20:56,360
To get rid of old laws that are no good

2251
02:20:56,360 --> 02:20:58,360
So you know

2252
02:20:58,360 --> 02:21:00,360
You can't grow, like the

2253
02:21:00,360 --> 02:21:02,360
Economy can't grow when it's hands

2254
02:21:02,360 --> 02:21:04,360
Are tied, and they literally they forced

2255
02:21:04,360 --> 02:21:06,360
They forced Elon to lie

2256
02:21:06,360 --> 02:21:08,360
What are we talking about? We're talking about Elon Musk

2257
02:21:08,360 --> 02:21:10,360
So they forced him to lie

2258
02:21:10,360 --> 02:21:12,360
Right, like basically

2259
02:21:12,360 --> 02:21:14,360
Somebody at the Securities and Exchange

2260
02:21:14,360 --> 02:21:16,360
Commission, they wanted to say that

2261
02:21:16,360 --> 02:21:18,360
They were the guy that took down Elon Musk

2262
02:21:18,360 --> 02:21:20,360
So they basically put his fucking

2263
02:21:20,360 --> 02:21:22,360
They

2264
02:21:22,360 --> 02:21:24,360
What the fuck are you doing

2265
02:21:24,360 --> 02:21:26,360
I'm reading the declaration of independence

2266
02:21:26,360 --> 02:21:28,360
So they basically

2267
02:21:28,360 --> 02:21:30,360
Said look, we're going to make

2268
02:21:30,360 --> 02:21:32,360
Tesla go bankrupt if you don't

2269
02:21:32,360 --> 02:21:34,360
Admit to these crimes that you didn't do

2270
02:21:34,360 --> 02:21:36,360
Basically, so they forced him

2271
02:21:36,360 --> 02:21:38,360
To say he

2272
02:21:38,360 --> 02:21:40,360
Committed these crimes

2273
02:21:40,360 --> 02:21:42,360
And dude, that's fucking complete corruption

2274
02:21:42,360 --> 02:21:44,360
Right, so I think it's poetic

2275
02:21:44,360 --> 02:21:46,360
Justice, that you had that level

2276
02:21:46,360 --> 02:21:48,360
Of corruption in this fucking

2277
02:21:48,360 --> 02:21:50,360
Country that's supposed to be so fucking perfect

2278
02:21:50,360 --> 02:21:52,360
I agree

2279
02:21:52,360 --> 02:21:54,360
Now he's in charge of them, right

2280
02:21:54,360 --> 02:21:56,360
Now you have Tulsi Gabbard who is on

2281
02:21:56,360 --> 02:21:58,360
The do not

2282
02:21:58,360 --> 02:22:00,360
Fly list, the terrorist watch list

2283
02:22:00,360 --> 02:22:02,360
Right, now she just got

2284
02:22:02,360 --> 02:22:04,360
Confirmed as the

2285
02:22:04,360 --> 02:22:06,360
Head of National Intelligence

2286
02:22:06,360 --> 02:22:08,360
Right, it's fucking poetic

2287
02:22:08,360 --> 02:22:10,360
Justice, dude, it's poetic

2288
02:22:10,360 --> 02:22:12,360
I guess

2289
02:22:12,360 --> 02:22:14,360
I agree if they did something

2290
02:22:14,360 --> 02:22:16,360
RFK, RFK

2291
02:22:16,360 --> 02:22:18,360
Officially got us like

2292
02:22:18,360 --> 02:22:20,360
He did

2293
02:22:20,360 --> 02:22:22,360
I've just come to understand both sides

2294
02:22:22,360 --> 02:22:24,360
Are fucking, you know, off their fucking

2295
02:22:24,360 --> 02:22:26,360
Rocker lately. I don't think they're off the

2296
02:22:26,360 --> 02:22:28,360
Rocker, dude

2297
02:22:28,360 --> 02:22:30,360
I think what always goes on

2298
02:22:30,360 --> 02:22:32,360
Is there's a battle

2299
02:22:32,360 --> 02:22:34,360
Right, there's a battle going on between

2300
02:22:34,360 --> 02:22:36,360
The fucking who's in control

2301
02:22:36,360 --> 02:22:38,360
And

2302
02:22:38,360 --> 02:22:40,360
Francis Lightfoot Lee, there's my grandfather

2303
02:22:40,360 --> 02:22:42,360
Very nice

2304
02:22:42,360 --> 02:22:44,360
So

2305
02:22:44,360 --> 02:22:46,360
You know, it's always like sorting itself out

2306
02:22:46,360 --> 02:22:48,360
Right, like the Republicans

2307
02:22:48,360 --> 02:22:50,360
Of today are really

2308
02:22:50,360 --> 02:22:52,360
They're really like the

2309
02:22:52,360 --> 02:22:54,360
Left of 20 years ago

2310
02:22:54,360 --> 02:22:56,360
And it's always changing

2311
02:22:56,360 --> 02:22:58,360
You saw that video of Madri

2312
02:22:58,360 --> 02:23:00,360
Taylor Greene that I sent, right

2313
02:23:00,360 --> 02:23:02,360
Yeah, I don't like her

2314
02:23:02,360 --> 02:23:04,360
She's psychotic

2315
02:23:04,360 --> 02:23:06,360
It just represents how like both sides

2316
02:23:06,360 --> 02:23:08,360
Yeah

2317
02:23:08,360 --> 02:23:10,360
At the extremes

2318
02:23:10,360 --> 02:23:12,360
I feel like both sides have become

2319
02:23:12,360 --> 02:23:14,360
Fucking extreme in the recent years

2320
02:23:14,360 --> 02:23:16,360
We used to have

2321
02:23:16,360 --> 02:23:18,360
John McCain versus Barack Obama

2322
02:23:18,360 --> 02:23:20,360
They were both a moderate Democrat

2323
02:23:20,360 --> 02:23:22,360
And a moderate Republican and they respected

2324
02:23:22,360 --> 02:23:24,360
Each other

2325
02:23:24,360 --> 02:23:26,360
Obama's not really moderate, but whatever

2326
02:23:26,360 --> 02:23:28,360
Well, he's a normal Democrat

2327
02:23:28,360 --> 02:23:30,360
Right, and they fucking respected each other

2328
02:23:30,360 --> 02:23:32,360
And they say, you know

2329
02:23:32,360 --> 02:23:34,360
We disagree, but we're not going to fucking

2330
02:23:34,360 --> 02:23:36,360
Like go insane about this shit

2331
02:23:36,360 --> 02:23:38,360
Well, the Democrats have gone

2332
02:23:38,360 --> 02:23:40,360
Sicko mode outside of the fucking shit

2333
02:23:40,360 --> 02:23:42,360
They have

2334
02:23:42,360 --> 02:23:44,360
I've come to realize that, but so have the

2335
02:23:44,360 --> 02:23:46,360
Republicans in response

2336
02:23:46,360 --> 02:23:48,360
To that

2337
02:23:48,360 --> 02:23:50,360
Dude, the fucking RINOs on the right

2338
02:23:50,360 --> 02:23:52,360
I fucking hate them too

2339
02:23:52,360 --> 02:23:54,360
You know what I mean? I hate both extremes

2340
02:23:54,360 --> 02:23:56,360
You know, I'm center

2341
02:23:56,360 --> 02:23:58,360
Left, dude, that's where I am

2342
02:23:58,360 --> 02:24:00,360
So, and right now

2343
02:24:00,360 --> 02:24:02,360
What actually is more center left

2344
02:24:02,360 --> 02:24:04,360
Than anything is fucking Donald Trump

2345
02:24:04,360 --> 02:24:06,360
But Donald Trump's not center

2346
02:24:06,360 --> 02:24:08,360
Left

2347
02:24:08,360 --> 02:24:10,360
See, he has to be Republican

2348
02:24:10,360 --> 02:24:12,360
Right, and he's

2349
02:24:12,360 --> 02:24:14,360
He has to say he's a Republican

2350
02:24:14,360 --> 02:24:16,360
Let's fucking go

2351
02:24:16,360 --> 02:24:18,360
Team USA beat Finland in the fucking

2352
02:24:18,360 --> 02:24:20,360
Four Nation Force face off

2353
02:24:20,360 --> 02:24:22,360
Let's go, Team USA

2354
02:24:22,360 --> 02:24:24,360
He was saying this week, like

2355
02:24:24,360 --> 02:24:26,360
Actually today, he was trying to end

2356
02:24:26,360 --> 02:24:28,360
The war in Ukraine

2357
02:24:28,360 --> 02:24:30,360
He had a phone call with Zelensky

2358
02:24:30,360 --> 02:24:32,360
And Putin today

2359
02:24:32,360 --> 02:24:34,360
To try to fucking

2360
02:24:34,360 --> 02:24:36,360
Make a negotiation

2361
02:24:36,360 --> 02:24:38,360
And he was like, oh, Ukraine

2362
02:24:38,360 --> 02:24:40,360
Has to accept that they're going to give up

2363
02:24:40,360 --> 02:24:42,360
The territory in eastern Ukraine

2364
02:24:42,360 --> 02:24:44,360
That was disputed

2365
02:24:44,360 --> 02:24:46,360
And so that was

2366
02:24:46,360 --> 02:24:48,360
The whole reason they went to war

2367
02:24:48,360 --> 02:24:50,360
Is because Russia claimed this land

2368
02:24:50,360 --> 02:24:52,360
Invaded them for this land that belonged

2369
02:24:52,360 --> 02:24:54,360
To Ukraine, so it's like, what was the point

2370
02:24:54,360 --> 02:24:56,360
Of the war

2371
02:24:56,360 --> 02:24:58,360
If we're just settling and fucking

2372
02:24:58,360 --> 02:25:00,360
Russia gets what they want

2373
02:25:00,360 --> 02:25:02,360
Well, you know, it's not that simple

2374
02:25:02,360 --> 02:25:04,360
Though, right, because

2375
02:25:04,360 --> 02:25:06,360
Human beings just want things

2376
02:25:06,360 --> 02:25:08,360
To be like, clear cut, black and white

2377
02:25:08,360 --> 02:25:10,360
There's a right guy, there's a wrong guy

2378
02:25:10,360 --> 02:25:12,360
There's a winner, there's a loser

2379
02:25:12,360 --> 02:25:14,360
What if both sides are wrong?

2380
02:25:14,360 --> 02:25:16,360
Like, what if they both

2381
02:25:16,360 --> 02:25:18,360
Did things that were wrong? What if they both did things

2382
02:25:18,360 --> 02:25:20,360
That were right? So what did Ukraine

2383
02:25:20,360 --> 02:25:22,360
Do wrong to get

2384
02:25:22,360 --> 02:25:24,360
Invaded by Russia?

2385
02:25:24,360 --> 02:25:26,360
So here's what they did wrong

2386
02:25:26,360 --> 02:25:28,360
And actually the United States overthrew their government in 2013

2387
02:25:28,360 --> 02:25:30,360
This is common knowledge now

2388
02:25:30,360 --> 02:25:32,360
That's how the CIA operates

2389
02:25:32,360 --> 02:25:34,360
So what they did wrong

2390
02:25:34,360 --> 02:25:36,360
Is Russia came to them

2391
02:25:36,360 --> 02:25:38,360
And they said, if you do not join NATO

2392
02:25:38,360 --> 02:25:40,360
We will give you 20 billion

2393
02:25:40,360 --> 02:25:42,360
Dollars

2394
02:25:42,360 --> 02:25:44,360
To not join NATO

2395
02:25:44,360 --> 02:25:46,360
So they gave them 20 billion dollars

2396
02:25:46,360 --> 02:25:48,360
And then turned right the fuck around and tried to

2397
02:25:48,360 --> 02:25:50,360
Join NATO

2398
02:25:50,360 --> 02:25:52,360
So, okay, dude, you're going to lose some of your country

2399
02:25:52,360 --> 02:25:54,360
Because you stole 20 billion dollars

2400
02:25:54,360 --> 02:25:56,360
Too fucking bad

2401
02:25:56,360 --> 02:25:58,360
Like, that's the price, dude, there's a real price

2402
02:25:58,360 --> 02:26:00,360
To that, it wasn't imaginary

2403
02:26:00,360 --> 02:26:02,360
Monopoly money

2404
02:26:02,360 --> 02:26:04,360
It's fucking real, you took it

2405
02:26:04,360 --> 02:26:06,360
And they said basically

2406
02:26:06,360 --> 02:26:08,360
It was like a 20 billion dollar

2407
02:26:08,360 --> 02:26:10,360
Package of like

2408
02:26:10,360 --> 02:26:12,360
I think they were going to supply them with like energy and shit

2409
02:26:12,360 --> 02:26:14,360
And they just turned

2410
02:26:14,360 --> 02:26:16,360
Right around and tried to join NATO

2411
02:26:16,360 --> 02:26:18,360
Bro, it's too fucking bad

2412
02:26:18,360 --> 02:26:20,360
You got invaded

2413
02:26:20,360 --> 02:26:22,360
Like you stole 20 billion dollars, that's what happens

2414
02:26:22,360 --> 02:26:24,360
Like, 20 billion dollars

2415
02:26:24,360 --> 02:26:26,360
That's 20

2416
02:26:26,360 --> 02:26:28,360
Thousand million dollars

2417
02:26:28,360 --> 02:26:30,360
Right

2418
02:26:30,360 --> 02:26:32,360
20,000 million

2419
02:26:32,360 --> 02:26:34,360
They stole, they're just these little fucking tracksuit

2420
02:26:34,360 --> 02:26:36,360
Wearing pricks, stealing everybody's fucking

2421
02:26:36,360 --> 02:26:38,360
Money, dude

2422
02:26:38,360 --> 02:26:40,360
Bro, but do you see now how Trump is

2423
02:26:40,360 --> 02:26:42,360
Supporting Israel just like Joe Biden

2424
02:26:42,360 --> 02:26:44,360
Did, sending fucking aid to Israel

2425
02:26:44,360 --> 02:26:46,360
And like, you know

2426
02:26:46,360 --> 02:26:48,360
It's basically the exact same thing

2427
02:26:48,360 --> 02:26:50,360
He just sent, yeah, he just sent a bunch of missiles

2428
02:26:50,360 --> 02:26:52,360
You know, a bunch of

2429
02:26:52,360 --> 02:26:54,360
Government

2430
02:26:54,360 --> 02:26:56,360
Taxpayer money

2431
02:26:56,360 --> 02:26:58,360
What happened to America first?

2432
02:26:58,360 --> 02:27:00,360
I don't think, dude, why are they both on the side of Israel

2433
02:27:00,360 --> 02:27:02,360
Nobody's getting on board with that

2434
02:27:02,360 --> 02:27:04,360
Like, you're just

2435
02:27:04,360 --> 02:27:06,360
But why are they both on the same side?

2436
02:27:06,360 --> 02:27:08,360
Because they control the banks, dude, you gotta be

2437
02:27:08,360 --> 02:27:10,360
You gotta be, you gotta be on their side

2438
02:27:10,360 --> 02:27:12,360
You don't have a choice

2439
02:27:12,360 --> 02:27:14,360
But

2440
02:27:14,360 --> 02:27:16,360
Anyway, are we playing Jeopardy?

2441
02:27:16,360 --> 02:27:18,360
Hell yeah, let's do Jeopardy

2442
02:27:18,360 --> 02:27:20,360
And I gotta leave by like midnight

2443
02:27:20,360 --> 02:27:22,360
Sam

2444
02:27:22,360 --> 02:27:24,360
Don't fuck with me

2445
02:27:26,360 --> 02:27:28,360
I didn't know if that was in the headphones

2446
02:27:28,360 --> 02:27:30,360
Like if he was replaying

2447
02:27:30,360 --> 02:27:32,360
In an earlier segment

2448
02:27:32,360 --> 02:27:34,360
I was like, what the fuck, what did I miss

2449
02:27:34,360 --> 02:27:36,360
And then you're actually doing it, why?

2450
02:27:36,360 --> 02:27:38,360
Welcome back to Jeopardy

2451
02:27:38,360 --> 02:27:40,360
I'm Alex Shabek, here with your

2452
02:27:40,360 --> 02:27:42,360
28-time winner Tyler

2453
02:27:42,360 --> 02:27:44,360
Should be 29, actually

2454
02:27:44,360 --> 02:27:46,360
Should be 29, but fucking Ali Max

2455
02:27:46,360 --> 02:27:48,360
Stole the win from me

2456
02:27:48,360 --> 02:27:50,360
13-time winner Dan

2457
02:27:50,360 --> 02:27:52,360
Oh yeah, baby

2458
02:27:52,360 --> 02:27:54,360
The vitamin B1 man

2459
02:27:54,360 --> 02:27:56,360
Actually, I'm kind of, I don't know

2460
02:27:56,360 --> 02:27:58,360
Am I feeling it? I kind of feel more awake

2461
02:27:58,360 --> 02:28:00,360
Than I was before

2462
02:28:00,360 --> 02:28:02,360
We would have to take a two-week break

2463
02:28:02,360 --> 02:28:04,360
To go in the 20s

2464
02:28:04,360 --> 02:28:06,360
What? Well, I think

2465
02:28:06,360 --> 02:28:10,360
There's gonna be an episode 99 and a half

2466
02:28:10,360 --> 02:28:12,360
Then we'd have to take a

2467
02:28:12,360 --> 02:28:14,360
One-week break

2468
02:28:14,360 --> 02:28:16,360
Well, if there's any off weeks

2469
02:28:16,360 --> 02:28:18,360
Or, we'll figure it out

2470
02:28:18,360 --> 02:28:20,360
Alright, we'll figure it out, we'll talk about it

2471
02:28:20,360 --> 02:28:22,360
99 and a half

2472
02:28:22,360 --> 02:28:24,360
Um

2473
02:28:24,360 --> 02:28:26,360
Back on the show today, we got

2474
02:28:28,360 --> 02:28:30,360
For the category today

2475
02:28:30,360 --> 02:28:32,360
We got, how do you like your eggs?

2476
02:28:32,360 --> 02:28:34,360
Oh, over-eased

2477
02:28:34,360 --> 02:28:36,360
The study of

2478
02:28:36,360 --> 02:28:38,360
Independent films

2479
02:28:38,360 --> 02:28:40,360
Give them hell

2480
02:28:40,360 --> 02:28:42,360
Master of the Macabre

2481
02:28:42,360 --> 02:28:44,360
Emo lyrics

2482
02:28:44,360 --> 02:28:46,360
The classic, classic emo lyrics

2483
02:28:46,360 --> 02:28:48,360
Speaking of, where the fuck is Ali Max?

2484
02:28:48,360 --> 02:28:50,360
Uh, matching

2485
02:28:50,360 --> 02:28:52,360
And matching acronyms

2486
02:28:54,360 --> 02:28:56,360
The fuck?

2487
02:28:56,360 --> 02:28:58,360
First pick is

2488
02:28:58,360 --> 02:29:00,360
Neither of you, because Ali Max won

2489
02:29:00,360 --> 02:29:02,360
I'll do it, because I should have won

2490
02:29:02,360 --> 02:29:04,360
C'mon, baby

2491
02:29:04,360 --> 02:29:06,360
Uh, Tyler's pick

2492
02:29:10,360 --> 02:29:12,360
Uh, let's do emo

2493
02:29:12,360 --> 02:29:14,360
Emo lyrics for 200

2494
02:29:14,360 --> 02:29:16,360
Am I more than you bargained for yet?

2495
02:29:16,360 --> 02:29:18,360
Oh, fuck, I know it's

2496
02:29:18,360 --> 02:29:20,360
Uh

2497
02:29:22,360 --> 02:29:24,360
Sugar, we're going down

2498
02:29:24,360 --> 02:29:26,360
By Fall Out Boy

2499
02:29:26,360 --> 02:29:28,360
Do you need the band to?

2500
02:29:28,360 --> 02:29:30,360
No, no, just the song

2501
02:29:30,360 --> 02:29:32,360
I was going to say Fall Out Boy, but then I'm like

2502
02:29:32,360 --> 02:29:34,360
It's not the band, it's the

2503
02:29:34,360 --> 02:29:36,360
It's the song, yeah

2504
02:29:36,360 --> 02:29:38,360
Dan's pick

2505
02:29:38,360 --> 02:29:40,360
Uh, eggs

2506
02:29:40,360 --> 02:29:42,360
How do you like your eggs? 200

2507
02:29:42,360 --> 02:29:44,360
Past tense from military jets that quickly took off in response to an alert

2508
02:29:46,360 --> 02:29:48,360
Scrambled

2509
02:29:48,360 --> 02:29:50,360
Ah, fuck!

2510
02:29:50,360 --> 02:29:52,360
Fuck, it was better than I wrote, fuck, I'm done

2511
02:29:52,360 --> 02:29:54,360
Emo

2512
02:29:54,360 --> 02:29:56,360
The lyrics are 400

2513
02:29:56,360 --> 02:29:58,360
When you find a man that's worth a damn

2514
02:29:58,360 --> 02:30:00,360
You're too well, he's a fool

2515
02:30:00,360 --> 02:30:02,360
You're just as well

2516
02:30:02,360 --> 02:30:04,360
Hope he gives you hell by all

2517
02:30:04,360 --> 02:30:06,360
American rejections

2518
02:30:06,360 --> 02:30:08,360
It's not hope he gives you hell, it's gives you hell

2519
02:30:08,360 --> 02:30:10,360
Same thing

2520
02:30:10,360 --> 02:30:12,360
He said I hope she gives you hell

2521
02:30:12,360 --> 02:30:14,360
We wait for being tactical, it's gives you hell

2522
02:30:14,360 --> 02:30:16,360
Just give it to me, you win so many

2523
02:30:16,360 --> 02:30:18,360
C'mon, bro

2524
02:30:18,360 --> 02:30:20,360
He said the right answer in there somewhere

2525
02:30:20,360 --> 02:30:22,360
Uh, Dan's pick

2526
02:30:22,360 --> 02:30:24,360
Eggs, eggs, eggs

2527
02:30:24,360 --> 02:30:26,360
400

2528
02:30:26,360 --> 02:30:28,360
For someone who is unsentimental

2529
02:30:28,360 --> 02:30:30,360
About violence

2530
02:30:30,360 --> 02:30:32,360
What is egg-nastic?

2531
02:30:32,360 --> 02:30:34,360
No

2532
02:30:34,360 --> 02:30:36,360
What?

2533
02:30:36,360 --> 02:30:38,360
Oh

2534
02:30:38,360 --> 02:30:40,360
Hold on, hold on, hold on, don't time it out

2535
02:30:40,360 --> 02:30:42,360
Don't time it out

2536
02:30:42,360 --> 02:30:44,360
Adjective for someone who is unsentimental

2537
02:30:44,360 --> 02:30:46,360
About violence

2538
02:30:48,360 --> 02:30:50,360
Oh

2539
02:30:50,360 --> 02:30:52,360
Hard boiled, what is hard boiled?

2540
02:30:52,360 --> 02:30:54,360
Yes

2541
02:30:54,360 --> 02:30:56,360
Like hard boiled like crime novel

2542
02:30:56,360 --> 02:30:58,360
I thought agnostic meant you were like indifferent

2543
02:30:58,360 --> 02:31:00,360
Towards it

2544
02:31:00,360 --> 02:31:02,360
It does, bro

2545
02:31:02,360 --> 02:31:04,360
It's how you lick your eggs

2546
02:31:04,360 --> 02:31:06,360
I thought it was a fucking play on words

2547
02:31:06,360 --> 02:31:08,360
Alright, I'll learn

2548
02:31:08,360 --> 02:31:10,360
Emo again I guess

2549
02:31:10,360 --> 02:31:12,360
You know, for 600

2550
02:31:12,360 --> 02:31:14,360
You could slit my throat and with my one last

2551
02:31:14,360 --> 02:31:16,360
Dying breath I'd apologize

2552
02:31:16,360 --> 02:31:18,360
What is make damn sure?

2553
02:31:18,360 --> 02:31:20,360
Oh no

2554
02:31:20,360 --> 02:31:22,360
No? That's not make damn sure?

2555
02:31:22,360 --> 02:31:24,360
You could slit my throat and with my one last

2556
02:31:24,360 --> 02:31:26,360
Dying breath I'd apologize

2557
02:31:26,360 --> 02:31:28,360
For bleeding on your shirt

2558
02:31:28,360 --> 02:31:30,360
For bleeding on your shirt

2559
02:31:36,360 --> 02:31:38,360
You could slit my throat

2560
02:31:38,360 --> 02:31:40,360
I know

2561
02:31:40,360 --> 02:31:42,360
And with my one last dying breath I'd apologize

2562
02:31:42,360 --> 02:31:44,360
For bleeding on your shirt

2563
02:31:46,360 --> 02:31:48,360
No, that would be your soul last summer

2564
02:31:48,360 --> 02:31:50,360
Oh my god

2565
02:31:50,360 --> 02:31:52,360
Emo again

2566
02:31:52,360 --> 02:31:54,360
Fuck

2567
02:31:54,360 --> 02:31:56,360
800, I'm stuck in a coma

2568
02:31:56,360 --> 02:31:58,360
Stuck in a never ending sleep

2569
02:31:58,360 --> 02:32:00,360
What is can't be saved

2570
02:32:00,360 --> 02:32:02,360
And then I'll finish off Emo

2571
02:32:02,360 --> 02:32:04,360
For 1000

2572
02:32:04,360 --> 02:32:06,360
Because

2573
02:32:06,360 --> 02:32:08,360
You know

2574
02:32:08,360 --> 02:32:10,360
Because you don't know us at all

2575
02:32:10,360 --> 02:32:12,360
We laugh when old people fall

2576
02:32:12,360 --> 02:32:14,360
What is fat led by something

2577
02:32:14,360 --> 02:32:16,360
Oh hell yeah

2578
02:32:16,360 --> 02:32:18,360
Mmm

2579
02:32:18,360 --> 02:32:20,360
Damn

2580
02:32:20,360 --> 02:32:22,360
Eggs baby eggs

2581
02:32:22,360 --> 02:32:24,360
You keep getting the egg ones wrong though

2582
02:32:24,360 --> 02:32:26,360
600, under the influence

2583
02:32:26,360 --> 02:32:28,360
Of marijuana

2584
02:32:28,360 --> 02:32:30,360
Like Ali Mack frequently is on Jeopardy

2585
02:32:32,360 --> 02:32:34,360
Under the influence

2586
02:32:34,360 --> 02:32:36,360
Of marijuana?

2587
02:32:36,360 --> 02:32:38,360
Under the influence of marijuana

2588
02:32:38,360 --> 02:32:40,360
Like Ali Mack frequently is on

2589
02:32:40,360 --> 02:32:42,360
Jeopardy

2590
02:32:42,360 --> 02:32:44,360
I don't know

2591
02:32:44,360 --> 02:32:46,360
I can't think

2592
02:32:46,360 --> 02:32:48,360
Of a thing for that

2593
02:32:48,360 --> 02:32:50,360
Say it one more time

2594
02:32:50,360 --> 02:32:52,360
Under the influence of marijuana

2595
02:32:52,360 --> 02:32:54,360
Like Ali Mack is frequently

2596
02:32:54,360 --> 02:32:56,360
On Jeopardy

2597
02:33:02,360 --> 02:33:04,360
Yeah time it up

2598
02:33:04,360 --> 02:33:06,360
That would be baked or fried

2599
02:33:06,360 --> 02:33:08,360
I was gonna say baked but I've never had a baked egg

2600
02:33:08,360 --> 02:33:10,360
Yeah what's a fucking baked egg

2601
02:33:10,360 --> 02:33:12,360
I don't know but it could be fried also

2602
02:33:14,360 --> 02:33:16,360
Damn stick

2603
02:33:16,360 --> 02:33:18,360
Fucking eggs let's get these eggs done with

2604
02:33:18,360 --> 02:33:20,360
800, add some mayo and

2605
02:33:20,360 --> 02:33:22,360
Celery and you've got this dish

2606
02:33:24,360 --> 02:33:26,360
What is deviled eggs

2607
02:33:26,360 --> 02:33:28,360
Nope

2608
02:33:28,360 --> 02:33:30,360
No it's um

2609
02:33:32,360 --> 02:33:34,360
I can see it um

2610
02:33:34,360 --> 02:33:36,360
I

2611
02:33:38,360 --> 02:33:40,360
I'd be egg salad

2612
02:33:42,360 --> 02:33:44,360
Okay I fucking hate this category

2613
02:33:44,360 --> 02:33:46,360
Damn stick

2614
02:33:46,360 --> 02:33:48,360
Is there another one in eggs

2615
02:33:48,360 --> 02:33:50,360
Yeah yeah

2616
02:33:50,360 --> 02:33:52,360
Let's just fucking get it done with

2617
02:33:52,360 --> 02:33:54,360
1000, also describes game that was

2618
02:33:54,360 --> 02:33:56,360
Illegally taken

2619
02:33:56,360 --> 02:33:58,360
What is poached

2620
02:33:58,360 --> 02:34:00,360
Very good that was good

2621
02:34:00,360 --> 02:34:02,360
That was good

2622
02:34:02,360 --> 02:34:04,360
I know that could have been playing a game where poachers are a problem

2623
02:34:04,360 --> 02:34:06,360
So I can

2624
02:34:06,360 --> 02:34:08,360
Totally you got

2625
02:34:08,360 --> 02:34:10,360
You got the study of independent films

2626
02:34:10,360 --> 02:34:12,360
Give them hell

2627
02:34:12,360 --> 02:34:14,360
Master of the Macabre

2628
02:34:14,360 --> 02:34:16,360
And matching acronyms

2629
02:34:16,360 --> 02:34:18,360
Master of Macabre

2630
02:34:18,360 --> 02:34:20,360
Master of the Macabre

2631
02:34:20,360 --> 02:34:22,360
For 200, Edgar Allan Poe's

2632
02:34:22,360 --> 02:34:24,360
Poem the Raven gave his name to this

2633
02:34:24,360 --> 02:34:26,360
City's football team where the story

2634
02:34:26,360 --> 02:34:28,360
Is based

2635
02:34:28,360 --> 02:34:30,360
Fuck

2636
02:34:30,360 --> 02:34:32,360
Do master of macabre

2637
02:34:32,360 --> 02:34:34,360
For 400

2638
02:34:34,360 --> 02:34:36,360
Well

2639
02:34:36,360 --> 02:34:38,360
Not a BLS war story, this post story

2640
02:34:38,360 --> 02:34:40,360
Is about someone being slowly cut

2641
02:34:40,360 --> 02:34:42,360
In half the long way

2642
02:34:42,360 --> 02:34:44,360
Oh fuck

2643
02:34:44,360 --> 02:34:46,360
Um

2644
02:34:46,360 --> 02:34:48,360
No that one

2645
02:34:48,360 --> 02:34:50,360
Is the coffin

2646
02:34:50,360 --> 02:34:52,360
Uhhhh

2647
02:34:52,360 --> 02:34:54,360
Time it out

2648
02:34:56,360 --> 02:34:58,360
The pit in the pendulum

2649
02:34:58,360 --> 02:35:00,360
We'll do the next one on that

2650
02:35:00,360 --> 02:35:02,360
For

2651
02:35:02,360 --> 02:35:04,360
600

2652
02:35:04,360 --> 02:35:06,360
Tyler Double

2653
02:35:06,360 --> 02:35:08,360
Tyler Double

2654
02:35:08,360 --> 02:35:10,360
Tyler's got 2000, Dan's got 400

2655
02:35:10,360 --> 02:35:12,360
What would be the standard

2656
02:35:12,360 --> 02:35:14,360
Deviation of this question

2657
02:35:14,360 --> 02:35:16,360
600

2658
02:35:16,360 --> 02:35:18,360
We'll do 4

2659
02:35:18,360 --> 02:35:20,360
400, this poe story

2660
02:35:20,360 --> 02:35:22,360
Features a man riddled with guilt

2661
02:35:22,360 --> 02:35:24,360
After killing and dismembering his employer

2662
02:35:24,360 --> 02:35:26,360
What is the telltale heart

2663
02:35:26,360 --> 02:35:28,360
Yes

2664
02:35:28,360 --> 02:35:30,360
Did you know that one

2665
02:35:30,360 --> 02:35:32,360
Um

2666
02:35:32,360 --> 02:35:34,360
Master of

2667
02:35:34,360 --> 02:35:36,360
Macabre

2668
02:35:36,360 --> 02:35:38,360
For 800, this poe story is named after

2669
02:35:38,360 --> 02:35:40,360
A superstitious furry friend

2670
02:35:46,360 --> 02:35:48,360
Named after a superstitious

2671
02:35:48,360 --> 02:35:50,360
Furry friend

2672
02:35:50,360 --> 02:35:52,360
No

2673
02:35:52,360 --> 02:35:54,360
Be the black cat

2674
02:35:54,360 --> 02:35:56,360
Uh

2675
02:35:56,360 --> 02:35:58,360
I guess I'll do the next one then

2676
02:35:58,360 --> 02:36:00,360
1000, poe married

2677
02:36:00,360 --> 02:36:02,360
Virginia, this kind of relative

2678
02:36:02,360 --> 02:36:04,360
When she was just 13

2679
02:36:04,360 --> 02:36:06,360
What is his cousin

2680
02:36:06,360 --> 02:36:08,360
Yes

2681
02:36:08,360 --> 02:36:10,360
Fucking poe

2682
02:36:10,360 --> 02:36:12,360
Uh

2683
02:36:12,360 --> 02:36:14,360
Tyler you got study of independent

2684
02:36:14,360 --> 02:36:16,360
Films, give em hell, matching

2685
02:36:16,360 --> 02:36:18,360
Acronyms

2686
02:36:18,360 --> 02:36:20,360
Give em hell, I don't know what this is gonna be

2687
02:36:20,360 --> 02:36:22,360
Give em hell, for 200, perhaps the most

2688
02:36:22,360 --> 02:36:24,360
Well known place named hell is

2689
02:36:24,360 --> 02:36:26,360
Located near Ann Arbor in this

2690
02:36:26,360 --> 02:36:28,360
Wolverine state

2691
02:36:30,360 --> 02:36:32,360
What is Michigan

2692
02:36:32,360 --> 02:36:34,360
Yes

2693
02:36:34,360 --> 02:36:36,360
Give em hell

2694
02:36:36,360 --> 02:36:38,360
God damn it

2695
02:36:38,360 --> 02:36:40,360
400, this adjective

2696
02:36:40,360 --> 02:36:42,360
Sounds devilish but really just means

2697
02:36:42,360 --> 02:36:44,360
Greek

2698
02:36:44,360 --> 02:36:46,360
What is Hellenic

2699
02:36:46,360 --> 02:36:48,360
Yes

2700
02:36:48,360 --> 02:36:52,360
That was a Dan question

2701
02:36:52,360 --> 02:36:54,360
Dan's big

2702
02:36:54,360 --> 02:36:56,360
Same category

2703
02:36:56,360 --> 02:36:58,360
I have your keychain on my

2704
02:36:58,360 --> 02:37:00,360
My little stand

2705
02:37:00,360 --> 02:37:02,360
600, Keanu Reeves

2706
02:37:02,360 --> 02:37:04,360
Played this hellblazing comic book

2707
02:37:04,360 --> 02:37:06,360
Character on film

2708
02:37:06,360 --> 02:37:08,360
What is Constantine

2709
02:37:08,360 --> 02:37:10,360
Good movie

2710
02:37:10,360 --> 02:37:12,360
Good comics

2711
02:37:12,360 --> 02:37:14,360
Hell

2712
02:37:14,360 --> 02:37:16,360
800, examples of

2713
02:37:16,360 --> 02:37:18,360
This supernatural canine include

2714
02:37:18,360 --> 02:37:20,360
Cerberus

2715
02:37:20,360 --> 02:37:22,360
Black dogs

2716
02:37:22,360 --> 02:37:24,360
English folklore

2717
02:37:24,360 --> 02:37:26,360
It's not even trying

2718
02:37:26,360 --> 02:37:28,360
Not even trying

2719
02:37:28,360 --> 02:37:30,360
It's like zoned out

2720
02:37:32,360 --> 02:37:34,360
Dan's coming back right now

2721
02:37:34,360 --> 02:37:36,360
Hell

2722
02:37:36,360 --> 02:37:38,360
The capital of Finland

2723
02:37:38,360 --> 02:37:40,360
This house sinking

2724
02:37:40,360 --> 02:37:42,360
Yes

2725
02:37:42,360 --> 02:37:44,360
There you go

2726
02:37:44,360 --> 02:37:46,360
There you go, you got one

2727
02:37:46,360 --> 02:37:48,360
I got one, I got more than one

2728
02:37:48,360 --> 02:37:50,360
Dan you got the study of

2729
02:37:50,360 --> 02:37:52,360
Independent films and

2730
02:37:52,360 --> 02:37:54,360
Matching acronyms

2731
02:37:54,360 --> 02:37:56,360
Matching acronyms

2732
02:37:56,360 --> 02:37:58,360
200

2733
02:37:58,360 --> 02:38:00,360
I'm going to give you

2734
02:38:00,360 --> 02:38:02,360
An acronym, you got to tell me what the other

2735
02:38:02,360 --> 02:38:04,360
Acronym is that matches it

2736
02:38:04,360 --> 02:38:06,360
The Culinary Institute of

2737
02:38:06,360 --> 02:38:08,360
America

2738
02:38:08,360 --> 02:38:10,360
What is CIA

2739
02:38:10,360 --> 02:38:12,360
Wait is it just the

2740
02:38:12,360 --> 02:38:14,360
Do you have to say like

2741
02:38:14,360 --> 02:38:16,360
Oh if it's these three letters

2742
02:38:16,360 --> 02:38:18,360
No it's, so I give you

2743
02:38:18,360 --> 02:38:20,360
The Culinary Institute of America that's

2744
02:38:20,360 --> 02:38:22,360
CIA so you say

2745
02:38:22,360 --> 02:38:24,360
Central Intelligence Agency

2746
02:38:24,360 --> 02:38:26,360
But he just said the CIA, he didn't say Central Intelligence Agency

2747
02:38:26,360 --> 02:38:28,360
So we can't just

2748
02:38:28,360 --> 02:38:30,360
Be the three letters

2749
02:38:30,360 --> 02:38:32,360
Right, but that agency

2750
02:38:32,360 --> 02:38:34,360
Technically yeah

2751
02:38:34,360 --> 02:38:36,360
Technically Dan was right but you're also right

2752
02:38:36,360 --> 02:38:38,360
From this point on

2753
02:38:38,360 --> 02:38:40,360
Gotcha, fine, fair enough

2754
02:38:40,360 --> 02:38:42,360
Dan's fake

2755
02:38:42,360 --> 02:38:44,360
Same category

2756
02:38:44,360 --> 02:38:46,360
400, Bed Bath and Beyond

2757
02:38:46,360 --> 02:38:48,360
What is the better

2758
02:38:48,360 --> 02:38:50,360
Business

2759
02:38:50,360 --> 02:38:52,360
Fuck

2760
02:38:52,360 --> 02:38:54,360
Tyler

2761
02:38:54,360 --> 02:38:56,360
Acronyms

2762
02:38:56,360 --> 02:38:58,360
600

2763
02:38:58,360 --> 02:39:00,360
Daily Double

2764
02:39:00,360 --> 02:39:02,360
Tyler's got

2765
02:39:02,360 --> 02:39:04,360
5400, Dan's got

2766
02:39:04,360 --> 02:39:06,360
2000

2767
02:39:06,360 --> 02:39:08,360
What would be

2768
02:39:08,360 --> 02:39:10,360
The standard deviation

2769
02:39:10,360 --> 02:39:12,360
Of this question

2770
02:39:12,360 --> 02:39:14,360
600

2771
02:39:14,360 --> 02:39:16,360
600, the Bureau of

2772
02:39:16,360 --> 02:39:18,360
Land Management

2773
02:39:18,360 --> 02:39:20,360
What is

2774
02:39:20,360 --> 02:39:22,360
Black Lives Matter

2775
02:39:26,360 --> 02:39:28,360
Tyler's got

2776
02:39:28,360 --> 02:39:30,360
Do the next one

2777
02:39:30,360 --> 02:39:32,360
Ray 100

2778
02:39:32,360 --> 02:39:34,360
Amiotrophic lateral

2779
02:39:34,360 --> 02:39:36,360
Sclerosis

2780
02:39:38,360 --> 02:39:40,360
Ami-o

2781
02:39:40,360 --> 02:39:42,360
Amiotrophic

2782
02:39:42,360 --> 02:39:44,360
Lateral sclerosis

2783
02:39:46,360 --> 02:39:48,360
Hold on

2784
02:39:48,360 --> 02:39:50,360
Let it ride

2785
02:39:50,360 --> 02:39:52,360
Ami-o

2786
02:39:52,360 --> 02:39:54,360
I know what it is but I don't know what the other

2787
02:39:54,360 --> 02:39:56,360
Amiotrophic lateral

2788
02:39:56,360 --> 02:39:58,360
Sclerosis

2789
02:39:58,360 --> 02:40:00,360
Hold on

2790
02:40:00,360 --> 02:40:02,360
Hold on

2791
02:40:02,360 --> 02:40:04,360
I mean

2792
02:40:04,360 --> 02:40:06,360
Fuck

2793
02:40:06,360 --> 02:40:08,360
I know it's ALS

2794
02:40:08,360 --> 02:40:10,360
But what's the other fucking

2795
02:40:12,360 --> 02:40:14,360
Most advanced life support

2796
02:40:14,360 --> 02:40:16,360
Oh fuck

2797
02:40:16,360 --> 02:40:18,360
It didn't even occur to me

2798
02:40:24,360 --> 02:40:26,360
Tyler's fake

2799
02:40:26,360 --> 02:40:28,360
1000

2800
02:40:28,360 --> 02:40:32,360
British Columbia

2801
02:40:36,360 --> 02:40:38,360
Before Christ

2802
02:40:38,360 --> 02:40:40,360
I was wondering

2803
02:40:40,360 --> 02:40:42,360
Are we doing the Latin version

2804
02:40:42,360 --> 02:40:44,360
Of it or are we doing the

2805
02:40:44,360 --> 02:40:46,360
No, Before Christ is

2806
02:40:46,360 --> 02:40:48,360
English actually

2807
02:40:48,360 --> 02:40:50,360
Dan you got the study of

2808
02:40:50,360 --> 02:40:52,360
An independent film

2809
02:40:52,360 --> 02:40:54,360
The study of, baby

2810
02:40:54,360 --> 02:40:56,360
The study of

2811
02:40:56,360 --> 02:40:58,360
Human behavior, culture, society

2812
02:40:58,360 --> 02:41:00,360
And linguistics

2813
02:41:00,360 --> 02:41:02,360
Fucking

2814
02:41:02,360 --> 02:41:04,360
God damn it

2815
02:41:04,360 --> 02:41:06,360
God damn it

2816
02:41:06,360 --> 02:41:08,360
For 400

2817
02:41:08,360 --> 02:41:10,360
Study of the skull

2818
02:41:10,360 --> 02:41:12,360
What is

2819
02:41:12,360 --> 02:41:14,360
Craniology

2820
02:41:14,360 --> 02:41:16,360
I was going to say

2821
02:41:16,360 --> 02:41:18,360
Phrenology

2822
02:41:18,360 --> 02:41:20,360
Same category

2823
02:41:20,360 --> 02:41:22,360
600

2824
02:41:22,360 --> 02:41:24,360
Study of internal secretory glands and hormones

2825
02:41:24,360 --> 02:41:26,360
What is endocrinology

2826
02:41:26,360 --> 02:41:28,360
Fuck fuck

2827
02:41:28,360 --> 02:41:30,360
This is your category Dan

2828
02:41:30,360 --> 02:41:32,360
Dan's got it

2829
02:41:32,360 --> 02:41:34,360
Same category

2830
02:41:34,360 --> 02:41:36,360
800

2831
02:41:36,360 --> 02:41:38,360
The study of water

2832
02:41:38,360 --> 02:41:40,360
What is aquology

2833
02:41:40,360 --> 02:41:42,360
Oh no

2834
02:41:44,360 --> 02:41:46,360
What is aquology

2835
02:41:46,360 --> 02:41:48,360
What is hydrology

2836
02:41:48,360 --> 02:41:50,360
Yes

2837
02:41:50,360 --> 02:41:52,360
I got the points back

2838
02:41:52,360 --> 02:41:54,360
Aquology

2839
02:41:54,360 --> 02:41:56,360
Dan's big

2840
02:41:56,360 --> 02:41:58,360
Same category

2841
02:41:58,360 --> 02:42:00,360
For 1000 the study of infants

2842
02:42:00,360 --> 02:42:02,360
What is

2843
02:42:02,360 --> 02:42:04,360
Neuronatology

2844
02:42:06,360 --> 02:42:08,360
What come back Dan you got

2845
02:42:08,360 --> 02:42:10,360
Independent films

2846
02:42:10,360 --> 02:42:12,360
7200

2847
02:42:12,360 --> 02:42:14,360
To 5000

2848
02:42:14,360 --> 02:42:16,360
7200

2849
02:42:16,360 --> 02:42:18,360
Oh 7200

2850
02:42:18,360 --> 02:42:20,360
Dan you got independent films

2851
02:42:20,360 --> 02:42:22,360
7200

2852
02:42:22,360 --> 02:42:24,360
This 1992 feature was Quentin Tarantino's

2853
02:42:24,360 --> 02:42:26,360
First film and focused on a

2854
02:42:26,360 --> 02:42:28,360
Jewelry heist gone wrong

2855
02:42:32,360 --> 02:42:34,360
What year?

2856
02:42:34,360 --> 02:42:36,360
1992

2857
02:42:40,360 --> 02:42:42,360
What is reservoir dogs

2858
02:42:42,360 --> 02:42:44,360
Yes

2859
02:42:44,360 --> 02:42:46,360
I'm not going to get into these

2860
02:42:46,360 --> 02:42:48,360
I was thinking

2861
02:42:48,360 --> 02:42:50,360
It's a fiction but then I'm like no it's not that one

2862
02:42:50,360 --> 02:42:52,360
It's reservoir dogs

2863
02:42:52,360 --> 02:42:54,360
Next one

2864
02:42:54,360 --> 02:42:56,360
400

2865
02:42:56,360 --> 02:42:58,360
A remake of this classic 1922 horror film

2866
02:42:58,360 --> 02:43:00,360
Was released in 2024

2867
02:43:00,360 --> 02:43:02,360
What is Nosferatu

2868
02:43:02,360 --> 02:43:04,360
Yes

2869
02:43:08,360 --> 02:43:10,360
Next one

2870
02:43:10,360 --> 02:43:12,360
600

2871
02:43:12,360 --> 02:43:14,360
This 2004 film about high schoolers in Idaho

2872
02:43:14,360 --> 02:43:16,360
Was made just for 400k

2873
02:43:16,360 --> 02:43:18,360
Over 46 million dollars

2874
02:43:18,360 --> 02:43:20,360
What is super bad

2875
02:43:20,360 --> 02:43:22,360
No

2876
02:43:22,360 --> 02:43:24,360
Oh

2877
02:43:24,360 --> 02:43:26,360
What is Napoleon Dynamite

2878
02:43:26,360 --> 02:43:28,360
Continue down this path

2879
02:43:30,360 --> 02:43:32,360
For 800

2880
02:43:32,360 --> 02:43:34,360
This 2004 film

2881
02:43:34,360 --> 02:43:36,360
Depicts the final 12 hours in

2882
02:43:36,360 --> 02:43:38,360
The life of Jesus of Nazareth

2883
02:43:38,360 --> 02:43:40,360
On the day of his crucifixation

2884
02:43:40,360 --> 02:43:42,360
What is the passion

2885
02:43:42,360 --> 02:43:44,360
Oh jeez

2886
02:43:44,360 --> 02:43:46,360
Damn

2887
02:43:46,360 --> 02:43:48,360
We'll do the next one

2888
02:43:48,360 --> 02:43:50,360
For 1000

2889
02:43:50,360 --> 02:43:52,360
Fuck

2890
02:43:52,360 --> 02:43:54,360
What's the scores

2891
02:43:54,360 --> 02:43:56,360
I've got 8600

2892
02:43:56,360 --> 02:43:58,360
Dan's got 5000

2893
02:44:02,360 --> 02:44:04,360
I've got 1000

2894
02:44:04,360 --> 02:44:06,360
For 1000

2895
02:44:06,360 --> 02:44:08,360
This 1999

2896
02:44:08,360 --> 02:44:10,360
Horror film populized the found

2897
02:44:10,360 --> 02:44:12,360
Footage genre

2898
02:44:12,360 --> 02:44:14,360
Oh damn it son of a bitch

2899
02:44:14,360 --> 02:44:16,360
I wanna god damn it

2900
02:44:16,360 --> 02:44:18,360
I was gonna do it true daily

2901
02:44:18,360 --> 02:44:20,360
God damn it

2902
02:44:20,360 --> 02:44:22,360
Well for the better

2903
02:44:22,360 --> 02:44:24,360
Dan can still win

2904
02:44:24,360 --> 02:44:26,360
Tyler's got 9000

2905
02:44:26,360 --> 02:44:28,360
Dan's got 5000

2906
02:44:30,360 --> 02:44:32,360
I don't have my phone on me

2907
02:44:32,360 --> 02:44:34,360
You'll just say it out loud after I

2908
02:44:34,360 --> 02:44:36,360
No you'll have to type it in my phone

2909
02:44:36,360 --> 02:44:42,360
We're gonna let Tyler pick the category for this one

2910
02:44:42,360 --> 02:44:44,360
What?

2911
02:44:44,360 --> 02:44:46,360
What category do you want?

2912
02:44:46,360 --> 02:44:48,360
Do you want pop culture or geography?

2913
02:44:48,360 --> 02:44:50,360
Pop culture

2914
02:44:50,360 --> 02:44:52,360
Alright

2915
02:44:52,360 --> 02:44:54,360
Pop culture Dan

2916
02:44:54,360 --> 02:44:56,360
True wager

2917
02:44:56,360 --> 02:45:16,360
Alright I got your wagers

2918
02:45:16,360 --> 02:45:18,360
Question is

2919
02:45:18,360 --> 02:45:20,360
American rapper

2920
02:45:20,360 --> 02:45:22,360
Bad Baby became famous after

2921
02:45:22,360 --> 02:45:34,360
Appearing on this talk show in 2016

2922
02:45:34,360 --> 02:45:36,360
American rapper

2923
02:45:36,360 --> 02:45:38,360
Bad Baby became famous after

2924
02:45:38,360 --> 02:45:40,360
Appearing on this talk show in 2016

2925
02:45:40,360 --> 02:45:42,360
Is that mine?

2926
02:45:44,360 --> 02:45:46,360
Uh

2927
02:45:46,360 --> 02:45:48,360
Tyler says Dr. Phil

2928
02:45:48,360 --> 02:45:50,360
That's correct

2929
02:45:50,360 --> 02:45:52,360
Tyler bet

2930
02:45:52,360 --> 02:45:54,360
Tyler bet 3000

2931
02:45:54,360 --> 02:45:56,360
He got 12000

2932
02:45:56,360 --> 02:45:58,360
Dan said Dr. Phil

2933
02:45:58,360 --> 02:46:00,360
He bet everything

2934
02:46:00,360 --> 02:46:02,360
He's up to 10,000

2935
02:46:02,360 --> 02:46:04,360
But Tyler still took it off

2936
02:46:04,360 --> 02:46:06,360
10,000 dollars Tyler

2937
02:46:06,360 --> 02:46:08,360
Catch me outside

2938
02:46:08,360 --> 02:46:10,360
How about that

2939
02:46:10,360 --> 02:46:12,360
That should be number 30 for me

2940
02:46:12,360 --> 02:46:14,360
But

2941
02:46:14,360 --> 02:46:16,360
Catch me outside

2942
02:46:16,360 --> 02:46:18,360
I didn't stand a chance there boys

2943
02:46:18,360 --> 02:46:20,360
You didn't stand a chance?

2944
02:46:20,360 --> 02:46:22,360
I didn't stand a chance

2945
02:46:22,360 --> 02:46:24,360
Why you were close

2946
02:46:24,360 --> 02:46:26,360
You were close

2947
02:46:26,360 --> 02:46:28,360
Smoke me like a fucking chimney god damn it

2948
02:46:30,360 --> 02:46:32,360
Alright

2949
02:46:32,360 --> 02:46:34,360
Well

2950
02:46:34,360 --> 02:46:36,360
Thanks for listening to the Untitled Podcast

2951
02:46:36,360 --> 02:46:38,360
If you have any suggestions

2952
02:46:38,360 --> 02:46:40,360
On what guests we should bring back

2953
02:46:40,360 --> 02:46:42,360
Or not allow back

2954
02:46:42,360 --> 02:46:44,360
Email us at Untitled Podcast

2955
02:46:44,360 --> 02:46:46,360
Untitled Podcast 73

2956
02:46:46,360 --> 02:46:48,360
At gml.com

2957
02:46:48,360 --> 02:46:50,360
Join us for episode 100

2958
02:46:50,360 --> 02:46:52,360
Live in Lake Placid

2959
02:46:52,360 --> 02:46:54,360
It won't be live but it will be

2960
02:46:54,360 --> 02:46:56,360
For us

2961
02:46:56,360 --> 02:46:58,360
We're gonna go hunt some ghosts up there

2962
02:46:58,360 --> 02:47:00,360
We're gonna take a picture at the

2963
02:47:00,360 --> 02:47:02,360
Miracle on Ice Rink

2964
02:47:02,360 --> 02:47:04,360
It's gonna be a nice one

2965
02:47:04,360 --> 02:47:06,360
Eat some good food

2966
02:47:06,360 --> 02:47:08,360
I'm looking forward to it

2967
02:47:08,360 --> 02:47:10,360
And as always

2968
02:47:10,360 --> 02:47:12,360
Be kind to yourselves

2969
02:47:12,360 --> 02:47:14,360
We out

2970
02:47:14,360 --> 02:47:16,360
I saw the joke

2971
02:47:44,360 --> 02:47:46,360
Extended episodes

2972
02:47:46,360 --> 02:47:48,360
Where the fuck did the

2973
02:47:48,360 --> 02:47:50,360
Siermans come from?

2974
02:47:50,360 --> 02:47:52,360
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?

2975
02:47:52,360 --> 02:47:54,360
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?

2976
02:47:54,360 --> 02:47:56,360
They're killing

2977
02:47:56,360 --> 02:47:58,360
Born babies and sell them to the Chinese

2978
02:47:58,360 --> 02:48:00,360
Aliens exist

2979
02:48:00,360 --> 02:48:02,360
Somewhere in China

2980
02:48:02,360 --> 02:48:04,360
Alright in some days

2981
02:48:04,360 --> 02:48:06,360
What the fuck

2982
02:48:06,360 --> 02:48:08,360
There are super soldiers that are at least 9 or 10 feet tall

2983
02:48:08,360 --> 02:48:10,360
Oh my god

2984
02:48:10,360 --> 02:48:12,360
Did they come from our planet?

2985
02:48:12,360 --> 02:48:14,360
Then they are extraterrestrials

2986
02:48:14,360 --> 02:48:16,360
They are aliens

2987
02:48:16,360 --> 02:48:18,360
What do we do?

2988
02:48:18,360 --> 02:48:20,360
I do not negotiate with them

2989
02:48:20,360 --> 02:48:22,360
What a fucking disaster

2990
02:48:22,360 --> 02:48:24,360
What the fuck

2991
02:48:24,360 --> 02:48:26,360
Oh god

2992
02:48:30,360 --> 02:48:32,360
We gotta go to the fucking moon

2993
02:48:32,360 --> 02:48:34,360
Because fucking JFK

2994
02:48:34,360 --> 02:48:36,360
Got assassinated by the fucking

2995
02:48:36,360 --> 02:48:38,360
Government

2996
02:48:38,360 --> 02:48:40,360
He got killed by the CIA

2997
02:48:40,360 --> 02:48:42,360
He was killed by the government

2998
02:48:42,360 --> 02:48:44,360
Before my eyes

2999
02:48:44,360 --> 02:48:46,360
While holding their pulse, feel them die

3000
02:48:46,360 --> 02:48:48,360
Of this virus

3001
02:48:48,360 --> 02:48:50,360
You feel bump bump bump

3002
02:48:50,360 --> 02:48:52,360
Nothing, they're fucking gone

3003
02:48:52,360 --> 02:48:54,360
I've seen it happen

3004
02:48:54,360 --> 02:48:56,360
I think that the government has

3005
02:48:56,360 --> 02:48:58,360
Taken it to the next level with the birds

3006
02:49:00,360 --> 02:49:02,360
They know what birds

3007
02:49:02,360 --> 02:49:04,360
Are going to cross caps with you

3008
02:49:04,360 --> 02:49:06,360
That you are going to be able to raise

3009
02:49:06,360 --> 02:49:08,360
And they are going to make them so fucking real

3010
02:49:08,360 --> 02:49:10,360
They are going to sink money into them

3011
02:49:10,360 --> 02:49:12,360
Because they know that if you put that motherfucker

3012
02:49:12,360 --> 02:49:14,360
In a cage they are going to be able to convince you

3013
02:49:14,360 --> 02:49:16,360
That thing is fucking real

3014
02:49:16,360 --> 02:49:18,360
You can cut it open, you are going to see blood cuts

3015
02:49:18,360 --> 02:49:20,360
No surgery, but let me tell you their technology

3016
02:49:20,360 --> 02:49:22,360
Is absolutely vile

3017
02:49:22,360 --> 02:49:24,360
Which by the way big brother is the overlord

3018
02:49:24,360 --> 02:49:26,360
We are only living in the third dimension

3019
02:49:26,360 --> 02:49:36,360
We are only living in the third dimension

3020
02:49:56,360 --> 02:49:58,360
George Soros is an actual Nazi collaborator

3021
02:49:58,360 --> 02:50:00,360
I'm not fucking lying

3022
02:50:00,360 --> 02:50:02,360
It's fucking real

3023
02:50:02,360 --> 02:50:04,360
Look it up

3024
02:50:04,360 --> 02:50:06,360
He says that he was doing this shit

3025
02:50:06,360 --> 02:50:08,360
George Soros actually worked with the fucking Nazis

3026
02:50:08,360 --> 02:50:10,360
During the Holocaust

3027
02:50:10,360 --> 02:50:12,360
He says that he was doing it just to survive

3028
02:50:12,360 --> 02:50:14,360
But he fucking loved it

3029
02:50:14,360 --> 02:50:16,360
He was having a great fucking time doing this shit

3030
02:50:16,360 --> 02:50:18,360
George Soros is the fucking devil

3031
02:50:18,360 --> 02:50:20,360
He's been doing this shit for a long time

3032
02:50:20,360 --> 02:50:22,360
He's been doing this shit for a long time

3033
02:50:22,360 --> 02:50:24,360
He's been doing this shit for a long time

3034
02:50:24,360 --> 02:50:26,360
He's been doing this shit for a long time

3035
02:50:26,360 --> 02:50:28,360
He's been doing this shit for a long time

3036
02:50:28,360 --> 02:50:30,360
George Soros is fucking evil

3037
02:50:30,360 --> 02:50:32,360
He's the actual fucking ringleader for all this shit

3038
02:50:32,360 --> 02:50:34,360
He's fucking put down a whole bunch of shit

3039
02:50:34,360 --> 02:50:36,360
Just don't fucking get it

3040
02:50:36,360 --> 02:50:38,360
Everybody likes Donald Trump

3041
02:50:38,360 --> 02:50:40,360
Donald Trump is the fucking worst person out there

3042
02:50:40,360 --> 02:50:42,360
Fuck Trump

3043
02:50:42,360 --> 02:50:44,360
He's not the actual fucking leader

3044
02:50:44,360 --> 02:50:46,360
It's George Soros, it's Bill Gates

3045
02:50:46,360 --> 02:50:48,360
It's fucking Elon Musk

3046
02:50:48,360 --> 02:50:50,360
It's everyone out there

3047
02:50:50,360 --> 02:50:52,360
Everybody says Elon Musk

3048
02:50:52,360 --> 02:50:54,360
It's the shit

3049
02:50:54,360 --> 02:50:56,360
Elon Musk is so cool he made a place for himself

3050
02:50:56,360 --> 02:50:58,360
The actual government is trying

3051
02:50:58,360 --> 02:51:00,360
The actual true government

3052
02:51:00,360 --> 02:51:02,360
Which is George Soros and all the fucking Nazis

3053
02:51:02,360 --> 02:51:04,360
Who are actually the ones that are trying to fucking all of it

3054
02:51:04,360 --> 02:51:07,360
The queer politicians are paid off by the fucking bill

3055
02:51:07,360 --> 02:51:23,360
It's your fucking aim and you're not passing pictures