The following program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.
Fewer discretion is advised.
This program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.
Welcome to Untitled Podcast, Episode 81.
The Anger Episode.
Tonight's the night we get a noise complaint called on us.
Here with Ali Mackin, Tyler who's angry for some reason.
Tyler, why are you angry?
Why do you gotta be angry, bro? I'm so angry.
Going off about Kamala Harris in the chat, I mean... Kamala Harris is a fun man.
I want to hear it. Why? Why Kamala Harris sucks?
And then bring the mic up so we can hear you.
I thought you wanted to hear why he was angry.
Oh yeah, yeah. You're right. We'll get there.
Shit days at work, fucking, you know, stuff happening.
Other things that we're not gonna go into.
Oh. Oh. I'm just an anguy boy right now.
We don't need a little bit of love.
We don't need love, we need hate. War is the answer.
Yeah, so it's getting real bad.
I saw the fucking US intercepted Chinese and Russian fighter jets off the coast of Alaska last week.
Operation Anchorage.
Yeah, it's like the first time that everyone's been this close to the US since Pearl Harbor.
That's cool.
Yup.
But Kamala...
Oh fuck.
You trust Kamala to be your fucking lawfully wedded fucking president?
I don't know. They're talking about... Trump's talking about trying to get JFK out and get him on his side.
Get JFK's corpse on his side?
No, no. RFK.
Get JFK on his side. Just dig up his corpse and just do a fucking thing.
He'll bring out of a freezer and throw it into a jar for a couple days.
He's my running mate.
RFK. He's talking about trying to get RFK on his side and get him to drop out so all the RFK votes will go to Trump.
They would.
Yeah.
Not mine.
I think just about all of them would.
I know.
Kamala is stupid. She's retarded. She's a human piece of garbage and I can't wait for her to lose on November.
Somebody really needs to teach her how to act more presidential before the election.
Also, I want to talk about this because I've been watching...
Her YouTube ads piss me off.
I've been watching a lot of political shit on YouTube and the news and stuff.
A whole bunch of these fucking reporters and stuff.
They're like, Donald Trump needs to talk differently to Kamala Harris because she is a woman.
If he doesn't talk to her in a different way, the women vote will not go to him because women do not like what another woman...
I mean, he can't call her a cunt.
Dude, fucking everybody's like... So people are going to take this...
Ted Cruz is a dog wife.
So people are going to take this and spin it like whatever Trump says to Kamala, they're going to spin it to make it anti-woman.
That's what they're going to do.
Every single thing that he does, they're going to go, okay, oh, he said this, that's anti-woman.
It's like he just said something about her fucking policies.
It's like he hates women.
People are being sexist though about her.
She's a fucking whore.
She's fucking sucked dick to get...
That's literally fucking documented that she sucked cock to get to be the prosecutor in California.
What do you guys said?
That cannot be correct.
That is fucking true.
She sucked cock to become the fucking prosecutor in California.
What are we going to do when she's on our period?
Yeah, like what are we going to do?
She's just going to fucking start going fucking...
See, that's sexist.
She's going to start PMSing all over the fucking place and fucking...
Then she's going to start a war.
That is a wild fake trap.
Oh my God, Tyler.
We are fucking...
I'm getting canceled today and I don't care.
Go ahead.
You already did.
Fuck her.
So this bitch is going to be fucking out there being like, we're going to win for women's rights.
We have the right to do women's stuff.
Guys, women power.
Donald Trump's like, I don't like her.
She's a whore.
She's fucking gross.
Look at her fucking ugly horse face.
Why do we have to go so extreme though?
Why do we have to go Donald Trump and fucking Harris?
Why do we have to go this far?
Because Casey, because people like you just didn't vote for Donald Trump.
We wouldn't have this if fucking you didn't vote for Donald...
If you voted for Donald Trump and we just got him to be elected the last fucking time,
we wouldn't have to deal with him again.
Fucking nuclear fucking option.
Elect Trump even if you hate him so you don't have to deal with him.
I don't believe in any of his beliefs.
I don't share any beliefs with him.
And every single belief that you have is absolutely fucking retarded.
Okay, Casey, Casey, can you outline some of your political views just more than you?
Casey, Casey, can you just give me, give me some of your basic political views and I'll tell you how retarded each one of them are.
Just give me, give me your, give me your, you think your, your most, your most agreeable stance to me and we'll go down the list from most agreeable.
Agreeable.
What do you think the stance that you have that is the most agreeable with me?
I really like socialism.
I think that you're absolutely fucking retarded.
Casey, for those of you out there who don't know, Tyler does not like socialism.
Socialism, communism, fucking all that shit is the worst fucking form of government because it will never fucking work because of human greed.
Human greed is the reason we will never have a utopian communist society where everybody makes good money and we don't have to stand in bread lines and get fucking executed because we don't.
Oh, wow.
Look, true communism has never been fucking, well, every single time a communist fucking thing, communist quote unquote, fucking got into power.
He just started shooting people.
Yeah, the communist success rate is not that high.
Why can't we just have democratic socialism?
Democratic socialism is fucking retarded, Casey.
What's up?
What is your fucking, where is your brain cells?
Because I think the weed killed them.
You're out of your fucking mind.
You don't have to have a fucking dictator to have socialism.
Oh, you don't have to have a dictator to have socialism.
So how the fuck are you going to be?
How much does everybody get now?
Well, I think we should do this.
And somebody's like, I don't like that.
So then they're like, oh, well, we'll replace them with a different leader.
And then that leader is like, huh, this is how much I think everyone should make.
And they're like, no.
And also socialism fucking makes jobs like doctors and fucking like engineers and stuff.
You don't want to do them anymore because you get paid just as much as a fucking McDonald's worker
because you think that everybody should be equally paid.
Guess what? If I'm being equally paid as a fucking McDonald's worker, I'm not going to be a fucking doctor.
What the fuck are you talking about?
I'm going to school for eight years to make the same amount of money.
Yeah. Great job, Casey.
The best in brightness will come to America then.
We should have everybody in America take a goat exam.
So let's listen.
This is my next controversial point that I'm going to fucking say.
Occupational aptitude test.
This is going to be my next controversial point today.
I think that America should have every mandatory fucking military service for every man, woman and child.
Why?
Because guess what? If you fucking.
This is not North Korea.
If we had mandatory service.
Israel does that too.
If we had mandatory service, it would make people realize how fucking good they have it in America
when they're out there fucking going, oh, this fucking sucks.
And also, we're just going to move half of our population to a war zone.
We're going to go.
You're all driving tanks for a week because Tyler wants you to know it sucks.
So we're doing this shit.
So we're saying if everybody is fucking signed up for the goddamn fucking military, then guess what?
The politicians are going to be like, maybe I don't want to go to war because my kids going to have to go to war.
Don't you think the youth is going to be pretty upset about that?
They don't have to do this.
Gen Z is fucking out there going, I'm going to do a dance on Tiktok.
They can't draft me.
I'm gay.
Guess what?
Doesn't matter if you're gay.
You're still getting a gun and you're going out there because even if you're not a good soldier, you're a real good cannon fodder.
Go out there and be a fucking American hero.
Another astounding take from Tyler.
If you're not offended by Tyler these past few minutes, send us an email.
Send us a podcast.
I will read it on air and I'll tell you how fucking retarded you are.
Please, please, please.
I hope we don't see any emails from lawyers.
We don't want lawyers talking about fucking.
This is all hypothetical.
Tyler offended every group of people in Minecraft in a dystopian show.
This shit's fucking out of hand.
This country is going downhill.
Kamala Harris is the fucking devil.
She's out here doing devil shit and you guys are eating it up.
Also, what happened with the Olympics?
Did you see that fucking shit?
They fucking were fucking mocking the fucking drag queen.
I didn't see that fucking mocking the last supper with goddamn drag fucking acting like and then people like, oh, really?
Did this happen?
Yeah.
And they're like, oh, Christians are offended now.
Wow.
Yeah.
You guys are real tough guys.
Like you fucking mocked my entire religion with fucking drag queens.
I'm going to be a little fucking upset.
You fucking assholes.
And guess what?
Best part was right after their fucking opening ceremony, the entire city of Paris is power went out except for the church.
Dude, I thought it was fucking funny.
I thought, oh, of course, Casey did the church have a generator?
Let's talk about how Trump said that once you vote in this election, you won't have to vote again.
Let me fucking double down on this one.
Yes, he said that.
Let me double down on this one, Casey.
He said, my fellow Christians.
He did not.
Once this election is over, you'll have to vote again.
Let me give you the full quote on this one, Mr. O'Neill, because you decided to fucking just make this your entire fucking talking point.
He goes, hey, he was at a fucking Christian rally that he was doing.
And he's like, my fellow Christians, yes, I'm a Christian.
I don't like that, though.
He's doing a rally for the Christians.
No, it was a it was a it was a fucking God bless America rally where they have political people come.
It's a it's a it's an every year God in state, though.
So he goes, I'm doing such a good job.
You're not even going to have to vote again because you just vote for me this once.
You won't have to vote ever again because I will be doing such a good job that you won't have to vote in your lifetime.
Basically, that's terrible.
No, it's not. It's a fucking Casey.
That's a pretty fucked up joke.
You're a fucking dictatorship, Casey.
Fucking you're out here fucking going.
I want communism and socialism.
I want you to know I'm probably going to vote for Trump, but that comment is off.
That is the only one I'm doing such a good job.
You won't have to vote again.
Yeah, that's a problem.
That's not a problem.
It was a fucking thing being like, hey, if you vote for me, you won't have to vote again as a fucking joke because he's saying I'm going to do such a good job.
It's going to be.
I get it. You just said that.
Yes, it's going to be so good.
That's not a good.
That's not a good backup to that.
I agree.
Well, fucking Alimax down the retard hole, too.
I'm not down the retard hole.
I'm still going to vote for the guy.
That's just an unhinged comment to me.
Fucking Casey's out here fucking pretending like he's saying that I'm going to jerk off on the podium and no one can fire me.
Trump literally said that he would be a dictator for a day.
Yes.
Oh, my God, Casey.
You fucking take all this shit out of context like a fucking retard.
All right.
Well, on another note with the Olympics, there's this guy named Tom Pidcock.
I think is I think the Turkish guy.
No, no, he's a great Britain motorcycle.
He was like he like had it out for his ex wife.
He's like, I'm going to show her.
I'm going to show her.
He had a no he had a fucking he was a mountain biker and they did.
It's the longer race.
It's like I can't remember like 12 miles or something.
But it's like he has a he's in front of everybody by like a minute and a half on like lap three like halfway through the race blows a tire gets a puncture on the fucking ramp as a huge setback takes him like three minutes to get back in the race.
He's like in one of the last spots moves all the way from fucking that spot.
Comes back to win the race by like a couple seconds.
Like I was talking about somebody else.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, that sounded now the fucking dude fucking sick.
There's one fucking Turkish guy did the fucking pistol shooting fucking thing.
No equipment.
It just fucking free.
I did just fucking shot it and got second place, which is wild.
You look at the other people.
They have like fucking telescopes and shit on their.
They just walked out of the fucking Apple store with a couple of new toys.
You get this guy looks like he just got off shift at his Denny at like a Denny's or something and came in and just started firing off hot shots.
It takes home an Olympic medal.
Like what the fuck?
I also don't understand why fucking women's women's beach volleyball.
They need to wear fucking bikinis.
Like, why do you need to wear bikini?
I love it.
I think they defend it.
They defend.
They defend it.
I understand that.
That's fucking crazy.
But why?
Like, like, you're just giving me a fucking show.
I'm having a great time.
But why are you fucking out here prancing around in your fucking bikinis and shit?
Based off of what I've heard, they like the feel of it more.
They also look like they're all fucking planks of wood.
They don't even look that great in bikinis.
I don't know, man.
There's some good looking ones.
There's that one fucking really, really good looking gymnast who fucking got a 10 and 20, not take going to have something about against bikinis now.
Bikinis?
No, I don't have a thing against bikinis.
I have a thing against it in the fucking Olympics.
You're representing your goddamn country.
You're not fucking being a fucking whore.
I don't think you're being a whore, though.
That's a long stretch to make.
Tyler, you're giving some extremist views today.
I'm fucking angry.
Everyone needs to cover up.
They shouldn't be allowed to vote.
And you're fucking going to the military, too.
Okay?
For a minimum of four years.
Everyone.
Do you not understand how un-angry that shit is when you string it together like that?
Dude, we're fucking going hard.
I got more of a hit-and-run.
You said they got to cover up, they cannot vote, and they have to serve in the military.
What the fuck?
Did you come out and say that you're not sexist after Kamala Harris PMSs all over the Oval Office?
Holy shit, man.
We also have another controversial take, every other religion besides fucking Christianity.
Oh my God.
We lost all our female audience.
We don't have a female.
He never had one.
Come on, bro.
Are you fucking kidding me?
I couldn't fucking pay my girlfriend to listen to this.
Are you joking?
We're going off the fucking rails.
Welcome to the reservation, because you're fucking off it, baby.
Welcome to the reservation, because you're not.
Tyler, I think you're taking the Trump thing too hard.
No, I'm just fucking going.
I am in a fucking pissed-off mood, so everything's fucking going off the rails.
I'm burning everything to the ground.
I can just see it already.
Why don't you put that hate, take that hate and put it towards rich people.
He's going to get a lifted pickup truck, and he's going to put a decal on the back of it that says fucking dirty hands, clean money.
Locally hated.
Yeah, a couple more months, you got the fucking tree tattoo going down your arm.
I'm going to talk about how these colors don't run fucking on my back.
The entire Declaration of Independence on my ribs.
Trump says, so you saved Trump's not a dictator, but after the assassination, after he got up, he raised his fist and said, fight.
Yeah, that's a fucking, it's a battle cry.
Fucking being like, fight who though?
Fight the fucking power, dude.
Fight the fucking breath breather dude.
Yeah, fucking fight that guy.
Fight for his own survival.
He probably thought he got hit way harder.
He probably thought he was going down for good.
Also, there's a whole bunch of leftists that say that he never even got shot.
Did you see these fucking blue anon fucking people?
They're going, he needs to release his medical records to show that he was actually shot.
And I'm like, are you fucking kidding me?
It was on live television.
The one thing I didn't like how is the day after the assassination, all the people on my fucking Instagram stories, like my friends who I know are left wing, were posting shit like, damn, we almost got them.
Yeah, that's fucking how is that your take?
That's fucking wild, bro.
And these are people I've had conversations with where it's like, I don't think that there's anything extreme.
But like if fucking Kamala or Joe Biden got fucking whacked, I'd be like, holy fucking shit.
That's wild.
Like, that's insane.
I would be, I would be mortified that that's what our country came.
I think that's a little extreme.
Hey Casey, can we, can we get another admonishment of this shooter against Trump?
What the fuck is that?
Me?
Ad.
He wants to fucking light his grave on fire.
What's going on?
No, that's a cremation.
I'm aware of what a cremation is.
That's a battlefield cremation, dude.
Also, when I get buried fucking send me out like the fucking old men in the Viking times.
Now you're going straight into a dumpster on to judge just like just like you're saying if Joe Biden got shot like my dad and then he like, oh, that's terrible.
I think political violence in any way, shape, form or is a bad Kamala got shot.
You'd be like, oh, ha ha.
I'd be like that bitch sucking dick to get in there.
Thank God the women's gone.
Oh shit.
Come on.
Would know.
I'd be like, well, what I just said right there, if somebody clipped it and took it out of context, I'm done right there.
I can't even mock you and not get canceled, bro.
Holy shit.
Listen, you can't get canceled if you don't give a shit.
Oh God, I'm so done.
I'm so done.
My career is over.
I just tell everyone that Jesus is good and everyone else fucking sucks.
Either you owe a lot of money to the slurger.
Well, the surjar is fucking garbage.
I could just totally see like somebody just picking us up and just coming through and being like, I'm going to make 15 YouTube shorts.
The crazy shit that people have said.
And those blow up.
People find out who we are.
We're done in a week.
We're all done.
Go ahead.
Fucking make my day.
No, I don't want to run for public office.
I don't give a shit about running for public office.
Listen, if I could be a dictator for a day, I would do it.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Fuck you.
You're not fucking Michael Jackson.
It's fucking Gandhi, bro.
It's also Michael Jackson.
Fucking Gandhi.
You ever fucking listen to Michael Jackson?
It's so it's so fucking another controversial opinion.
Was Michael Jackson actually considered white at the end of his life?
No.
Or did like or did he just like not know because I hear like a whole bunch of considered African-American Christ, but like on his license on his license, does it say Caucasian or not?
Does it say Caucasian or does it say African-American?
Because he does not look African-American at the end of his life.
Also, whoever his fucking classic surgeon was should have been fucking fired immediately.
That dude looked like a fucking walking fucking ghoul towards the end.
He really did.
The fucking doctor should be fired too.
The one that fucking.
Does anything tell what your race is on your fucking license?
Yeah, it does.
I know it had your hair in your eyes.
In some states it does.
Well, on your license?
Yeah.
No, it just gives your height, your eye color and your sex.
On my passport says my race.
Yeah.
I got to get a fucking new license.
Anywho fucking what's another controversial opinion I can say right now?
I think I think we've had enough of them.
No, we don't.
No, I think I think we should wrap that up.
No, we got some more.
Seal that away in a jar and throw away the key.
So Casey, give me another one of your political ideas that I can rip apart because you're a fucking idiot.
That women should have the right to abortion and.
I support that for the record.
How long?
I am I am right leaning and I support that.
How far into how far into it?
Let's say two, two trimesters.
I say end of first.
Yeah.
Had enough time to make a decision by then.
And you know what? Like I personally don't want abortions, but I'm also a Catholic male.
And for me personally, I don't agree with abortion.
That doesn't mean that everyone else shouldn't have an abortion.
No one's going to respond to that.
I'm just kind of stunned that you did not have an extreme mistake on that.
That sounds fairly reasonable.
I thought you're going to be like you're killing babies.
I don't like that they're killing babies, but I just don't think like everybody's like third trimester abortion.
Like that shit doesn't happen, though.
Like that's so that's so rare.
And I used to have the take of like I don't think that there should be abortion whatsoever unless there's like in cases of like rape or stuff like that.
Rape or incest.
And then I was like, that's kind of a garbage take.
Like that's not like I rethought that one.
That used to be my stance.
So for me and my when I was left, I had a right wing opinion on abortion.
And that's flip flop now for me and my wife.
I'm like, hey, I don't want if we if we have a kid, we have a kid type thing.
I don't want there to be an abortion because that's the sticker you'd have on your truck.
Hard work and God's work.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to cut you off.
I saw a fucking light bulb went on.
God's work.
Tyler's girlfriend clearly does not listen to the podcast.
Yes, she does.
We already had this conversation.
My guy.
Oh, God bless your soul.
I'm sorry.
Holy shit.
But I got this as my phone stick.
You're all in.
Oh, you're all in.
Oh, yeah.
I just want that one night I joined late and you guys are already playing the rock.
We're talking about poker stars VR for the listeners.
God, God willing, you're familiar.
But there's the rocket game and fucking I just came in and you guys were playing that shit.
I think you were losing more and you were just like, fuck, fuck.
He doesn't go above fucking two in fucking six turns, man.
It was like like over there spinning the wheel, trying to get some money.
It's a busted out last time.
I lost two million dollars on that game last week.
Oh, God.
I think the most I lost on on a on that was I got I think I lost two hundred thousand dollars just now.
I made two million and then I lost it.
Yeah, that sounds that sounds about right.
Were you playing a rocket game?
Yeah, the rock really do the rocket game.
You can fucking win big or you can lose horrible every time I've had it.
I've crashed and burned quick because I've came in and I'm like, all right, I'm going to wait until it gets to like two or like two, two point five every time.
And just fuck every time.
Yeah, it's like I couldn't cash out quick enough if I tried.
It's like fucking time.
It's like fuck.
Like, am I supposed to make money on this?
I don't know.
I think I just have shitty.
Yeah, it's like the stock market.
Yeah.
But then there's other times when it goes with like fucking four hundred that one time when we were sitting there for like two minutes and it went up to four hundred times your fucking shit.
And I'm like, oh, my fucking God Casey, where do you decide to fucking pull out though?
I don't.
You like Warren Buffett says you invest and you just invest forever.
But when you're fucking doing the rocket game, though, like when it goes up, like when you just like, you know, now you don't.
You said you're making money on it.
You're cashing out at some point.
What is the thought process behind?
No, the thing is, like, when do you like?
I remember what his fucking thought process was. He threw in a hundred thousand dollars at one point, and that's where it fucking went up to like four hundred times.
The fucking thing he's like, oh, yeah, no, I didn't have a thought process at that point.
I was just gambling and he pulled out like two hundred and he is like, oh, yeah.
And then immediately just lost it all because he was fucking betting like fucking a million dollars fucking a piece.
I just left out whenever we throw the words blackjack around case. He's just like, yeah, uh, yeah, I got to go mow the lawn.
I don't know if I can.
Why don't you like blackjack anymore?
Because I lost so much money.
I think the best night, eight hundred million dollars.
There's nothing I like more than just playing blackjack with a virtual dealer with the boys though, because it's not like poker where it's like you got to be quiet sometime.
It's like a huge showdown. People are thinking, I don't know, poker is fun.
But then like somebody busts out and they're just like in fuck off.
And that just kind of sucked because you only ever want to do tournaments.
We can't do a cash game. We were playing cash games last week.
Yeah, we did a couple of cash games.
We literally did one thing. He fucking was doing okay.
And he just goes, I'm all in every fucking hand and everyone at the table is like, are you fucking kidding?
I have noticed that if you get tilted twice, you start going all in.
It's funny because it usually works out for you the first and the second time you do it.
No, I just go in when I'm going to get off soon.
Yeah, but then you win and you stay on.
It doesn't work.
I was doing it because after he left, I played for another four hours with a bunch of randos at the table and was just shooting the shit with a bunch of people from like fucking Florida and fucking like fucking Georgia.
And yeah, we were at that table with all the Florida boomers.
Yeah. And there's a monkey once he's like, I am my grandbabies are coming over tomorrow and I'm going to give them some tea.
Oh, yeah. I played as poker stars a lot in that time because I like that.
Not even joking. That was their actual accent.
I'm like, what the fuck?
I just I don't know. I like poker stars sometimes.
Let's like I think I lost like the extrovert energy to like talk to people like I'm more scared of speaking to people over poker stars VR than I am speaking to people in real life.
It's hard for me to like just be like, oh, yeah.
Hey, what's going on? Oh, you got the kids this week.
Oh, oh, oh shit.
You beat me on that one.
Fuck you.
Like it's like it's weird.
There's occasionally like if I'm fucking high enough, I'll be like, you don't want to talk to people in poker stars.
Yeah. Oh, weird. Yeah.
I like talking with I like shooting the shit with you guys because it's just funny to me.
But like I have had nights where like I've either been drunk or I've been high and we play like VR chat or something and you get into like an actual conversation with somebody that gets like way deeper than it should.
Yeah. And that's like fun.
But like that's happened to me like twice the entire time I've owned that headset.
For me, it's like I just feel like, dude, VR chat.
They can see me.
VR chat got like I like once I figured out how many fucking like predators run VR chat, I didn't want to play it anymore.
Well, I remember the one that we had was that for you.
We were we were talking to the one chick.
It was saying that like she worked in like a nursing home or something.
And then she was asking us about EMS and we had like an hour and a half long conversation with this person.
It was like, that was a cool person. It's like I sent him a friend request. I'm like, I'm never going to speak to them again.
I am never going to be like, hey, I vied last night.
Let's fucking talk. What the fuck am I going to do?
Develop a friendship with someone who lives a million miles away.
So over V, I've got people do that. That's the craziest.
My favorite is ruining VR dates. That was me and Casey's best thing.
Like when me and Casey were at our fucking peak on VR chat, there'd just be people like looking out at the fake fucking like I did that with you a couple.
Dude, it was so funny. I remember the one time we did that.
Did I do that with you or with you when we were in the fucking Minecraft world and it was like over like this big.
Yes. Yeah, it was me.
I remember there was like this whole fucking thing that was going on because there was this one dude who was the admin of the server.
And then he kept on telling us that we're going to I'm going to ban you from the server.
I'm like, go ahead. Fucking try.
But he had that relate because he when we came into the server, we fucked with him first before we found that really.
Like, oh, what are you doing? He's like, I can't remember.
He just said some shit along the lines of like, I'm sad.
It was like, oh, that guy's depressed.
And he was staring at himself in a mirror the whole fucking time.
Then we went and talked to them.
I remember in the little bit we gathered before we got too close to them and fucked with them.
I overheard the chick talking about how she was cheating on the server with this guy.
We go like, sup, bitches.
How we fucking do it.
You're on VR chat having a date.
Wow. Do either of you have jobs by chance?
I like the dude always tries to get up and I try to be tough.
He's like, yo, man, that's my girl.
Who am I? You're fucking virtual girlfriend.
Wow, dude, you're fucking real cool.
You do.
We're trying to get a conversation.
I was like, what are you going to do, buddy?
Fucking make you yell at me.
Oh, boy, I'm fucking scared.
I remember the one thing that I said I felt bad because this is essentially was just being mean to them for no reason.
But I was just like, who's like, dude, come on, like, don't don't fucking do that.
You're like, if you want to talk privately, get a fucking discord server, man.
Fuck like you can't just like it's not my fault for coming over here and being an asshole.
You're doing this in VR chat like you got us jumping from 15 worlds.
Let's see what shit we can start here.
Like there's a million people that are doing that.
So you can follow around.
Start mimicking your skin.
Like you, you now look at this.
You look like fucking nerd.
Like, who do you think she'd fuck right now?
Me or you?
We look the same, buddy.
Dude, you can't even tell I'm fucking you, bro.
I just love the skins.
We had because for a while we all have the skins we played as I can't remember exactly what yours.
I can't remember what anyone's was.
I remember you were little P.
He was fucking I was in Shaggy in the wheelchair more than anything.
And I was fucking I was I was Alex Jones.
I had the Alex Jones skin that I fucking was.
And then fucking I thought of Joe Swanson with a gun.
I was him for the longest time.
But like I just go up to people and just fuck with them the entire time.
It was so fucking funny because I just like I feel like like it's just like every time I like I go on VR.
Chat now I'm like there's just like when you were like 20 and doing it, it was funny.
But I'm like I'm 26 now.
And like I just like there's like a bunch of like fucking like 17, like 14 year olds like I'm like it hasn't been six years.
Yeah, it has been six years.
I just remember I felt I felt a little bit like that.
Yeah, it has been.
There's no way it's been.
No, dude, I was like we were like fucking I was like 21, 22, like maybe maybe 20.
We got to look up when the quest to released.
Yeah, because it was about a year after.
But regardless, I just remember like every once in a while, I'd hear the call.
Twenty twenty.
I'd hear like the call of like what made the nerds like it.
And it was like we'd go to like a world when it was like we were getting tired and it was like a sleepy cabin world.
And it's like you had the option to lay down on the bed.
Yeah, just like look up.
It's like music and there's like a big screen next to you.
It was just like I could totally chill here and just smoke weed and just like fucking relax to this for six hours.
And then like you take the headset off and you're like, whoa, why did I think that that was like an OK thought?
You're like that is so fucked that that's what I wanted to do with like hours of my time is strap a fucking essentially a TV to my head
and look at an environment that was better than real life.
It's like fuck.
Like that's that's a problem that like I have to worry about now.
Like I was in a day and age where a fucking computer is a preferable world to the one we live in.
I go in Rocket League and I lose ten fucking games in a row.
And I remember why fucking hate computers.
Dude, so I was doing one.
Can I get that vape?
I got myself worked up.
I don't know if I I don't know if it was with one of you guys, but I think I think it was with one of you guys.
Were you on the map that like had like the like the the hotel rooms on like the upper like you hit the elevator and you go on like the horror map?
Right. No, no, not the horror map.
Like it was like a hotel like it was like a club in the bay in like the standard area and you press like the elevator buttons and you could go up and there's like the actual like hallway and like hotel rooms that you could go into.
I yes I remember this and like some people trying to fuck.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
This is weird.
So I would fucking like people wouldn't lock because there's a lock on the door that you could actually lock the door and not let people in.
I was like, hey, guys, like we're trying to do something here.
I'm like, you guys trying to fucking VR.
That's real fucking weird, dude.
What the fuck are you doing?
Yeah, because VR chat supports you can't see it when you're on the quest.
But VR chat, if it's two people that are playing on PCs rigs, they can do shit.
We're like they get like full body sensors on.
Yeah.
So it tracks their movement like much more realistically fucking retarded.
And then they have like fucking do like a little strip tease for you.
Wait, I got to run in the closet.
I took my bra off.
Okay.
Let me walk back out.
And it's like, what the fuck are we doing?
Yeah.
How is this humanity?
I walked in and it was like two naked avatars.
It's like fucking like probably virgins.
Yeah.
You think there's like two naked avatars like what the fuck are you doing?
Just wild.
And there's like, oh, no, we're just we're just having a conversation.
I'm like, no, you two are fucking VR.
You guys are fucking weird, dude.
I'm going to report you guys.
I don't I don't give a shit about that.
That's where it gets too weird for me to even open the door.
That almost feels too real for me.
I just like there's a couple of doors and it's like I could open them and fuck with them.
But it's like at the same time that feels like that in that moment, it's like I feel so bad for the people behind that door and the situation that they're in.
This is what they're going to private fucking world.
There's private worlds in the fucking game.
You can do that.
The one thing I will say is that there's a ton of people who have gotten married because of VR chat, which is wild to me.
But it makes sense, dude.
But like you got people who like take it super serious and you had fucking retards like us that were going around fucking with everybody.
Do you think those couples that get married on VR chat will like once like once they like move in together and everything, you think they still are like, can we fuck each other in the?
Your anime avatar like the whole lot better than they put on.
It's over here.
They put on the fucking VR headsets and then fuck.
I should probably go on the slur jar.
Well, it's but I was just like, what the fuck, dude?
And then like then like there's like people that have like the fucking all every single fucking like nerd on that fucking thing has like a fucking like customized anime avatar.
That's like a fuck boy with like the fucking stupid long hair and shit.
And then they fucking their fucking broccoli heads and then they get on VR chat and their fucking broccoli heads in there, too.
It's like, come on, man.
Get shaggy with a wheelchair, dude.
Like you can literally be anything and you're just like break your fucking game.
And it was so fucking funny, though.
You could just do so much stupid shit.
And these people are like, yo, we're trying to have a fucking date here.
So I like, but it's probably a fucking pedophile.
12 year old, it's so fucked up like, why do you think about it?
VR chat is just not good.
Yeah, like scary.
I was like sitting there and I was at the fucking fake bar taking like the bottles and just throwing them at the wall.
So they shattered.
And then I just heard like, you know, murmuring up the stairs at like the one thing and I'm like, there's murmuring up there.
I'm going to go fuck with them.
So then they're out there and then there's like a fucking like anime looking dude and anime looking girl.
You know, there's probably people.
I saw a light out there.
There's probably people who could fucking.
Dan's trying to fuck with us.
Yeah, it is fucking with us.
There's probably people out there who have PTSD from getting raped in VR.
It's just insane.
You can just turn the fucking screen off.
Yeah.
But imagine that.
Imagine that like a persistent predator saying like, oh, no, take your skin naked and fucking get in bed.
And if they feel pressured, they might do that.
We see you, Dan.
But it's like, but like you can't fucking.
He's trying to be all scary.
He put his fucking flashlight up to his face.
He's like, oh, I'm spooky.
Yeah.
But like, seriously, though, you can't charge that person with a crime.
But like, that's something that I could see feasibly, especially if you had a tracking suit.
That's something that could get somebody PTSD is like I was coerced.
They're fucking insane.
I was.
Well, yes.
Like I was coerced into VR sex and I felt violated.
I could totally see that happening.
Just take your fucking headset off.
Yeah.
But you fucking.
I don't know.
I'm trying to describe the mentality that these people are in at the time.
They feel pressured.
It was just so.
And VR can VR can fucking immerse you far enough that you feel like you don't have that out.
Look at it.
Look at.
All in.
Oh, my God.
Seven to one.
You're like, I got a straight draw.
So like we're just fucking like we're just sitting there and like they're just big dudes.
And like I just heard like these two like like people mumbling upstairs.
So I fucking walked up the stairs.
They're looking at like the fucking VR like fucking like like Skyline thing.
And I'm like fucking whatever.
Like it went up and I love you baby.
She's like, I love you too.
And I'm like, hey, guys, I love you guys both too.
And they're like, hey, buddy.
And I keep they try to act all big and tough on VR.
Am I are you going to fucking virtually punch me?
Yeah.
What are you going to fucking do?
Oh, boy.
You're going to report me for doing something that wasn't bad.
All right.
Gotcha.
Ten four.
I'm going to virtually.
I'm going to fucking I'm going to pummel you, dude.
I might come to me in real life and I'll fucking kill you.
All right, Tyler, is this your address?
I come fucking find me.
You know where to find me.
I'll be waiting.
Fifteen year old broccoli had shows.
He's shaking with fear.
You fucked with me and my girl on VR chat.
I'll be like, I'll kill you on my fucking get off my property.
You're fucking done.
Dude, but these fucking like we go on a break case.
He just fucking left.
I don't know.
We're just talking.
All right.
But like to VR chat was so fucking there's that one fucking world that gave us all the
rapper avatars that we had.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You were fucking little peep.
He was fucking X.
And I think I was juice world.
Yeah.
Then there was the fucking little Tracy.
I was a little Tracy.
Yeah.
Then there was the fucking if you did like the secret, you could get to X's tomb.
Yeah, you could get it.
It was an HD skin that was.
Yeah.
You could get like the HD X skin, which like you couldn't wear for the quest VR.
I remember hooking my hooking my fucking my head set up to my computer.
And then there was just fucking like actual fucking like tip physics on the girl avatars.
Mike, what the fuck is going on here?
I can confirm because of Casey, some of them worked with the Oculus, though.
But like fucking I think like you could go like this and the tits would start bouncing
shit.
Yeah, that's fucking weird.
The thing the thing you walk around with a fucking naked dude skin and have his dick
out just like he's got he's walking people like with his arms out like Frankenstein.
Yeah.
It was fucking bizarre.
They would be trying to fuck me.
One fucking character with a fucking dildo attachment to their hand.
And you try to run up behind you and fucking sink it in your back door.
And it's like, get the fuck away from me.
You're running away from Casey and VR trying to penetrate me with an anime girl midget
with a fucking 12 inch black dildo in her hand.
What the fuck?
Yeah.
You remember that?
You remember when you had the fucking avatar with the dick and you just walk around trying
to touch people with your cock and avatar and VR chat?
Yeah.
We covered that.
Yeah.
Is he still out there?
What a fucking nerd.
I never looked back.
I just saw him walk.
Yeah.
There he is.
Yeah.
So I see his I just see his figure in the door just peering at me now.
We knew it was you, Dan.
They're freaking us out.
Dan, I want you to know I never even looked back.
Oh, really?
God, I'm so jealous of your fucking caffeine right now.
You were just like.
I was trying to be creepy.
Like I wanted to be like just begging off that you're like, wait, did I see something?
No, I can see your fucking stupid mustache.
Let me see the growth.
Oh, I love it.
I love it.
Holy shit.
Both have mustaches.
Yeah.
I fucking love it.
You're going to you're going to look like that guy.
You look like a fucking you look like a cop.
You look like no you look like fucking what's the dance kind of always looked like a cop.
What's that fucking show with fucking the one guy?
He's like a soccer coach or something with a mustache.
Oh fuck.
Are you referring to Miracle?
No, no, dude fucking he was fucking clean shaving.
Do I know?
I know.
I'm just being a day.
I heard coach ran with it.
It's been a bad week for the stock market.
Well, it's about a bit of bad few weeks for the stock market.
It's over.
You fucking got out about the fucking.
I fucking quit pulled out.
Wait, wait, you quit for good.
I got my money idling on the side.
I'm waiting for the so you're jumping back in and like two days then no waiting for the
ship to sink because I think this is a I think this is a big one.
So there's a kid like a college kid who was doing trade options on Robin Hood and he saw
I think it was like the glitch in Berkshire Hathaway or something or something like that
where it showed that he had negative seven hundred thousand dollars in his account all
of a sudden and so he killed himself right.
It was a glitch.
Yeah.
And then like the next day like it was like back to sixteen thousand or whatever.
Oh my God.
He thought he would have to pay back seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Oh my God.
That is so tragic.
His family was like suing Robin Hood or some shit.
They might have good crowns on that one.
I don't know.
That's tough.
Dude, what the fuck?
Jordan Peterson looks like Hunter Biden.
What do you mean?
Jordan Peterson and Hunter Biden look fucking similar.
They actually kind of do.
Yeah, that's fucking weird, dude.
I don't know which one's which.
Do Jordan Peterson went off the fucking rails.
I am Peterson trying to open up a university now.
Yeah.
Peterson Peterson Academy.
Yeah.
Peterson Academy or some shit.
Before we get off the topic of stocks, though, why do you think this is the big one?
This is over.
I think that this is the big one because there hasn't been a 10 percent loss in the stock
market and the S&P in two years.
Right.
That's a good time to buy.
Wow.
So you're 50 on Tesla today.
It was on a fire.
So I threw 150 on Tesla today.
How much was it?
I can't remember.
What was it like 250 today or something?
It's like 252 or something.
That's not a good price.
215.
Yeah, I think it'll go back down to 180.
Well, if it does, sayonara to my money and I'll see you when you come back up because
I'm not pulling it out.
Yeah, I think it'll go back to 180, 190.
I'd start buying it again at 190.
Right now it's been so all over the place.
I just can't even, I haven't touched it in a month and a half.
It's been due from fucking 210 to 260 to 230 to-
I almost pulled out two days ago, I think, because it was like it went up to the moon.
Keeps swing trading.
Yeah, not if it swings down to 180.
Oh, but you can-
It's swinging though.
It's swinging.
All right.
You just don't know which way it's going.
But all right, so that 10% dip was a problem, right?
Because that hasn't happened.
That correction hasn't happened in two years and that's how often you expect the correction
to happen.
So this, the problem is, is like the next day it dipped again and then the next day
it dipped again and then it came up a little bit.
It went up and then it went back down again.
That's when I should have sold it.
Yeah, it's like that's okay.
So if that only happens once every two years and the next day was terrible too and the
day after that was terrible, it's like something else is going on here.
This is a time to- we're due for a recession.
This is-
It's the big one.
We're not just due, we're overdue.
So I think what they're doing actually, I think they're trying to, I think the Fed is
pushing it off because they don't want it to happen under the Biden administration.
Why do you think that a correction is due every couple of years?
I know it is, but like, or like a recession rather.
A recession not every couple of years, a recession, recessions are natural.
It's like every 20 years.
Yeah, they always, recessions always happen, right?
So there's a pattern to them.
It's too much inflation.
And they're expected, right?
So we're at a point where it's never gone this long, the market like this, without a
recession.
So how does a recession fix it?
By like years.
Got three words for you, Dan.
Credit default swaps.
Yeah, so-
That's how we're going to make money off this recession.
That's a good question.
So let me think about that because I've heard, I've heard this explained in YouTube videos.
He's holding his fucking phone up to the mic.
So yeah, can we not do Duolingo on the air, please?
It basically has to do-
Jesus Christ.
It basically has to do with, so like trade deficits and trade surpluses, right?
So right now we're at like a trade surplus and it's really like we're living high on
the hog when we really don't deserve it.
We're basically on credit.
So you're telling me I shouldn't have just moved into a substantially more expensive
apartment.
No, it doesn't matter, it's not going to change anything, dude.
I remember the recession of 08.
Recessions really affect rich people more than they do like people that are like middle
class.
I mean, I remember I used to be able to ask my parents to a certain extent, be like, hey,
can I get a video game?
And they'd be like, sure.
And then there was a couple of years when I was a kid where that was an immediate no
every time.
Me and your dad are working our asses off.
He can hardly afford the fucking house.
So Dan, I hope you brought your, I hope you were ready for a debate today.
Debate.
They're making us square off.
You guys have heard enough of me and Tyler going at it.
I really think that a debate between you two moderated by me and Dan would be fantastic.
So write some questions for next time.
What is this a debate about?
Uh, like, like politics, basically.
I am a master.
Do you think you could be?
I am a master.
So we're trying to elect the president of the podcast.
The president of the podcast.
You guys are running for president of the podcast.
What you already had the fucking president of the podcast.
Casey, there is a president.
Don't don't cause when we start making money, he's going to use this and steal all our
money.
Dan, you can't just declare people tuning here.
My fucking controversial takes.
That's why people listen because I fucking get the people going.
Okay.
I can't fucking quantum theory like me though.
All right.
So did you fucking, Oh Dan, you weren't here for my controversial takes.
Yeah.
You're going to, you're going to have to listen to the, uh, it was not a pretty start from
Tyler.
I hate Kamala Harris.
Uh, Tyler, Tyler within a couple of breaths said that women should not be allowed to
vote.
They need to cover up and it's mandatory that all men, women, and children in the military
to serve.
I mean, all men, women, children in the United States have to serve for X amount of time
in the military.
Yeah, I agree with that.
I want to see how you can say which half, but then he started referring to Kamala Harris
PMSing all over the oval office and how she could not be trusted in those times.
She has it.
Okay.
If Kamala Harris was a meal, right?
Like if I had to compare her to like a food, she'd be a happy meal.
She would be like steamed cauliflower.
It's just like, nobody gets excited.
Oh dude, fried chicken.
He'd be like, you know, you shouldn't really like it, but you do.
You're like, you know, Joe Biden, what kind of, what kind of food would he be?
Dude, he's right up there with, he's like fucking Brussels sprouts, fucking steamed
Brussels sprouts.
What about Obama just Obama was like your standard American mashed potatoes and just
decided me.
Thought I was going to say KFC.
No, he's just, he was just, you're running the mill.
What you're looking for.
Like I'm hungry.
It works.
Like this is good.
No, it would be the Mac and cheese of presidents, the Mac and cheese, Mac and cheese is like
not really good for you, but you just can't get enough of it.
Jimmy Carter is like the age old fine wine.
Jimmy Carter is a peanut.
I don't know who would be the mac and cheese.
But I want to see how you and, you and Dan go at it.
Cause you both are, are kind of like, I don't want to be the president of the podcast.
So well, you don't have to be the president.
You're basically just trying to win over me and Tyler and trash how I met.
You know, I'm going to come out.
You would respect, I'm going to come at you with the way that I would hope a politician
would talk to me.
So me and Casey are the Donald Trump and the fucking like, you know, Hillary Clinton.
And then you guys are going to be like, we've got some theme music for you.
I'm also quite politically uninformed.
We're too agreeable to agree.
We're going to fix America together.
Damn.
Yeah.
We're going to like join teams.
They're going to be fucking co fucking things.
Yeah.
It's not going to work.
Casey Casey has put a lot of work into this.
Casey just fucking puts into a lot of work.
The things that really don't matter.
Wow.
I feel like that's everybody here.
Yeah, Dan, I'm going to start with you.
Should a should Roe v. Wade be really re-instituted or should abortion rights be up to state versus
Wade?
That was the one where abortion versus abortion should be part of the law.
Part of the fucking state thing.
All right.
Dan's time here.
Tyler, we're the moderator.
We're marking.
We're marking me.
We're going to give Dan a chance to respond.
Dan, you have two minutes.
So Roe versus Wade was the thing saying that abortion is illegal.
Daniel, Daniel, Daniel, Mr. Delaney, you have two minutes.
Okay.
Roe v. Wade was protecting.
I think it should be viewed as any other healthcare procedure.
That's it.
Well, Donald.
It's up to the patient.
It's up to the individual person.
So Donald Trump got rid of Roe v. Wade, right?
Is how much time you know, he put it back up to the states.
Yeah.
Do you think it should be a side?
I don't think the state should decide how medical care is done.
So you think it should be up to the national or the states?
I don't think that there should be any laws involved in people's healthcare.
Like, I don't understand what's so fucking hard about that.
It's all the care.
So you think abortion should be legal?
The government should have no fucking say in people's healthcare.
Damn right.
What the fuck?
It's like, it's like the question isn't, you know, should it be allowed or shouldn't
it be allowed by the government?
It's like, what the fuck is the government doing in my fucking healthcare?
You know what I mean?
It's not my healthcare because I'm not getting abortion, but in people's healthcare.
It's like how about we just take the government out of it.
That's it.
That's all.
That's your time.
Ali Mac.
Hold on.
Ali Mac, you have two minutes to retort.
I mean, I can just go on about.
I agree with him for two minutes, but that's, that's absolutely right.
I just don't think it should be covered by the government at all.
Is that your retort?
Yeah.
I just, I don't.
That's my time.
I guess.
Do you think it should be up to the state or the federal government?
They shouldn't be involved.
I don't, yeah.
I don't, I mean, I guess whatever.
So you're saying Mr. McDonald, Mr. McDonald, you used your time.
I'm fucking answering me.
You used your time.
You are a very interrupting fucking meteor here.
You have used your time.
I have not used my time.
I had two fucking minutes.
You said time.
Since we agree on this, I want to throw an analogy.
That's like saying, how much ketchup do you think should be on your cereal?
And it's like, there should be no ketchup on my fucking cereal.
That's it.
That's what I feel about that.
And that's up to me to decide, damn it.
Right.
I like it.
All right.
I got a question.
Tyler's question.
Daniel, you have two minutes.
He didn't ask a question.
No, no.
I just, I prefaced that.
Daniel, you have two minutes to, uh, how would you, um, how would you, uh, how would
you, uh, battle the inflation that we are currently seeing in the United States currently?
You have two minutes on the clock.
That's a good one.
All right.
So, uh, what I would do is unfortunately, I agree with this on an economic level, but
it stings a little bit on the environmental impact.
Uh, we have to lower the price of fossil fuels and we, we have to stop this electric agenda,
right?
We have to stop everything electric because when you open up the pipelines and you make
fuel cheap, that makes getting your groceries to the store cheaper.
It makes production cheaper, makes everything cheaper, lowers the price of goods.
And then we can give time, uh, for the inflation to self-correct with lower prices of goods.
So the inflation will correct if interest rates come down.
That was a good answer.
Okay.
Is that your time, sir?
All right.
So Mr. McDonald, your time starts now.
You have two minutes to return.
I think they need two minutes.
I think they need like one minute.
Yeah, that's, that's a lot of time.
We'll give it, we'll give it one minute.
You have one minute to retort.
So here's the deal.
I don't know a fucking thing about the global economy whatsoever.
So what I think we do.
No, you're supposed to say that about him.
Yeah.
Dan doesn't know a fucking word.
Oh, what he's talking about.
All right.
So here's what we're going to do.
We're going to make the minimum wage five times as much as it is.
And then we're going to pay all the rich people way fucking less.
Actually we're going to pay them the same.
We're going to pay them the same.
We're going to, we're going to pay everybody the same.
We're going to go straight up communist in here.
So you're saying that we're going to give communism the good old college try.
This would be $75 per hour.
We're going to, yeah, yeah, I think, I think everybody, everybody makes $75 an hour.
We see what happens.
We see how long it lasts.
Civilization may break down.
That is, that is a, that is a very realistic side effect.
That is your time.
That was out of the box answer.
That is your time, Mr. McDonald.
Thank you.
Next question.
Start with Dan.
Should felons be allowed to vote or run for president?
You have one.
Why get to answer felons be allowed to vote?
Two-part question.
Should Trump be banned from running for president and indicted for insurrection?
You have one minute to respond.
So let me answer the first one first.
What is you having a felony have anything to do with you wanting to have a say in the
outcome of the country?
Because you're a criminal and criminals.
I don't think that.
I think that we should have felons in the White House.
It's not, when you start with Dan every time and he says, should I agree with it?
I don't even have the time to fucking give my take.
I feel like we're going to have the same thing to say on this one.
But what, why, because you're a criminal, it's like, okay, like some crimes people don't
even, the governments don't even agree on whether or not it's a crime.
So say the state of New York says you're a felon, Texas doesn't agree that you're a felon.
Right?
So you unfortunately got a felon in this state over here, but now you can't vote on the outcome
of the entire country.
No, that's ridiculous.
And whether or not you should be able to be president.
I mean, obviously this is in reference to what's going on with Donald Trump.
You have 11 seconds.
Obviously that's a politically motivated, he's a felon because even, even the former
DA of New York city of New York said, but I'll give you time.
Do you have a record?
You never would have been charged.
That is your time, Mr. Delaney.
I'll give Dan a chance to answer.
Do you think Trump should be indicted for insurrection?
You know, that's, that's complicated.
I mean, indict him or not, whether you want to say, was it an insurrection or not an insurrection?
This country was started on an insurrection.
I mean, insurrections are a natural part of freedom.
So yeah, indict him.
Thank you, Mr. Delaney.
Mr. McDonald, same question.
You have one minute to respond.
Yeah.
Well, unlike my compatriot here, I'm going to try to get this within the timeframe here.
Thank you.
So do I think felons should be allowed to vote?
I'm going to come out and I'm going to say, no, run for president.
Run for president.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Why not?
If, if the, if the country wants you, if the people who are voting for you want you in
office, yes.
And that also answers the thing with Trump.
That also answers the thing with Trump is yeah, you should be able to vote for him.
I don't think that there should be anything barring from him.
If the American people believe that he should be in office, then he should be in office.
It doesn't matter about the charges pressed against him.
What was that?
What was the third one there?
Do you think Trump should be indicted for insurrection?
I don't think so.
I don't, I, I don't think so.
Cause at the end of the day, the American people, thank you.
You don't need a f*****g buzz in here.
Jesus Christ.
All right.
And when I go over, you're going to let me go over cause you f*****g interrupted me too.
All right.
You're at four seconds.
I don't give a f**k about your god damn.
That is your time.
Yeah, that's fantastic.
That's your time.
At least in the last 15 seconds, argue with Tyler.
Yeah, because it's a f*****g minute and a half extra.
No, no, no.
He gets a minute and a half cause you want to hear his answer.
What type of f*****g media are you?
This is such s**t production quality.
You want to f*****g know.
This is your time.
I go for the downfall of this f*****g debate.
Can you mute his mic?
This is the deep state.
This is what the deep state does.
Exactly.
Look at this s**t.
They're trying to f*****g silence me.
All right.
Ali Bek, you answered the question.
Next question over to Tyler.
Oh, I don't get any extra f*****g time.
Next question.
And start with me this time too.
I will start with this.
Mr. McDonald, we have a huge border crisis.
There are people coming across this border that are illegal.
Your opinions on whether we deport them or your opinion on what we should do with the
illegal immigrants.
You have one minute to respond and then Dan will have one minute to retort.
All right.
First off, Tyler, I would like to thank you for asking that question in three different
ways.
I think everybody who's here right now, if they're working, if they got jobs, we keep
them.
If they don't, kick them the f**k out.
Other than that, lock the border down.
If you want to come in, you get a job over here, f**k it.
Come on in.
Why not?
Love to see it.
If you're coming over here to f*****g wheel drugs around or you're trying to get in illegal
illegally without going through correct processes, of which I believe if you get a job on the
other end, send them off through.
I'm going to pause your time for a second.
I'm meaning illegal immigrants.
I'm not talking about people who are coming here legally.
I'm talking about specifically illegal immigrants.
If they don't have jobs, deport them.
If they have jobs, give them a chance at citizenship.
Give them a chance at citizenship.
Well, like, because you need to pass the tests and everything.
You need to go through the process of becoming a citizen, but you should be doing that.
But you're clearly, you're productive over here.
I don't think they should have any penalty.
Should you, should you, do we think that allowing them to cross the border illegally is the
correct thing to do?
No.
So, so what you're saying is that you're for legal immigration, but not against illegal
immigration.
I'm against illegal immigration now because you're going from administration to administration,
which has some have tried to lock it down.
Others are lackadaisical about it.
So if you're here and you're a productive member of society, you have a chance at citizenship.
Otherwise get them the fuck out.
But how did they get here?
If they got, I understand they got here illegally.
That's what I'm saying.
They're grandfathered in like from here on out, fucking lock that shit down unless you're
going through the proper process of immigration.
He's like your time's up.
Yeah.
After he fucking extends it, your time's paused.
The fuck is this over the dance?
You are now on the clock, Daniel.
I don't know what that last thing he said was.
I don't think he knows either.
No, you know, having a job has nothing to do with whether or not they came here illegally
or illegally.
I don't disagree with that.
Yeah.
So having a job has nothing to do with it.
They have to go back.
But I think what we should have is like maybe like a demilitarized zone where it's kind
of like a gray area.
They don't really go back.
You give them some time in this area where they can figure out if they want to go through
the process legally.
And if they don't, they can go back.
So it's almost like.
So you're saying essentially the same take.
Mr. McDonald, you cannot talk during his period.
He has a minute.
It's like an asylum area, right?
It's like towns built by the government.
You're removing the job as part of it.
Although, Mr. McDonald, can you please be quiet when Daniel's speaking?
Can you please be quiet while Daniel speaks?
They can try and come back in legally or they can go back.
So if they can't pass the process to come in legally, they have to go back.
You have 10 seconds left.
That's it.
That's all I got to say.
I think you're going to lose.
I think we both got good ideas.
That is your time.
Start.
Start with Ali Mac.
Can we mute the other person's mic during the other time?
I think it's way too long up on this fucking timer thing.
We're having a fucking debate here.
There has to be order.
I think you're just looking for an outlet for the anger you walk in the doorway.
But that's just me.
Do you want to go back to the two minute timer?
We can go back to two minutes.
You're the guy who suggested the one minute timer.
I would like my question.
Ali Mac, would you institute a maximum age limit for things like being president or driving?
You have one minute to respond.
Thank you.
Well, I would say in terms of the driving thing, it's I think that once you pass a certain
threshold, let's say 50 or you have like a medical condition that could impair your ability
to drive, that should result in a little bit more routine checks because usually I don't
like giving that power to the government.
But in this sense, I'm concerned about the safety of the citizens.
Yes.
As for president, I don't think so.
I think that just the American people should have brains to not vote for somebody who's
incapable of running.
So I don't think that I because if you had a prime candidate that everybody liked, but
he was old but not senile and you couldn't vote for him because of that age cut off,
you're fucked up.
You can see you can see so well with Joe Biden and Donald Trump just how different people
can be at similar ages.
So like, thank you.
You throw me off every fucking time you say that.
Then they become senile.
Your time is up.
Mr. Mr. Yeah, that's why you have to vote in no confidence.
Mr. Delaney, you have time to do it.
You have one minute to respond.
All right.
So I'm going to say is this intersection here.
OK, two cars are coming at each other for the intersection.
We can pull up diagrams and visual aids.
OK, you see that?
He just did it.
So is this the correct way for those two cars to turn?
I know I've thought about that a lot.
Which is the correct way?
Is that the correct way?
Now, the first one, the first one is the first one is OK, so we don't necessarily all agree
on that.
OK, and that's everyday driving.
I mean, I don't do that.
Wouldn't it be nice if we had a test to brush up on our driving rules?
Right.
Like say, say you hit 60 years old and you just go to a refresher course and your abilities
are retested by a driving instructor.
Not going to get your license taken away, but they're going to evaluate where you're
at.
OK, I think that was just visibly failed.
We should have reevaluations at certain ages, whether it's president.
Your time is up.
So we agree on that.
OK, next question.
Dan's first on this one.
Dan first.
Are health care workers, they are being paid limited amounts of money for a high level
level job?
Do you as president of the United States, would you help the health care people by raising
the tax base to start paying health care providers or would you leave it the way it is and have
it privatized?
Private industry has nothing nothing to do with the government.
One minute.
I have a problem with the question.
That's private industry.
What about fire and police?
It's like you let private industries fail at their own pace.
But what about the local?
OK, so what about the municipal services?
Do you know about them?
Should we add more money to them?
More money.
Are we should we add more money to them and do that?
More money like raise their salaries?
Yes, raise their salaries.
They get fucking they work seven days a month.
The fucking firemen work seven days a month.
It's like they should get paid twenty five grand a year to work seven days a month.
Fuck you.
Work in seven days a month firefighting.
I think we know how Dan feels about this.
So I kind of I disagree in some ways with Dan because there are I think they respond.
Thank you.
Fucking Christ.
All right.
No, I think they I think that if you're getting paid shit, yes, it should be like there's
departments around here that pay fucking dog water where I work pays well enough because
the town government recognizes the drought of people that are involved in the US.
Well, I think I paid a shitload of money.
The main concerning of my question is should EMS and services like that be federalized
or you didn't say that?
I mean, some of it, but no, the system we have.
Yeah, you're just making it up.
He's got a fucking whole list of questions to ask.
All right.
Let me let me answer that now.
Should healthcare workers be paid more?
Should firemen be paid more?
Should should EMS be federalized?
Where are we going?
All right.
I got the next one.
No, I'll fucking answer the question, though.
I'm not getting shipped out of my question.
You did answer the question.
No, I didn't.
I answered the question before he changed it.
No, I think that I think the system that we have in place works fine for the commercial
agencies and then you have your privatized agencies within the government that works
fine and they should regulate the pay at which they're for the end of the day.
If EMS is more professional, they get paid a whole lot more money.
But at the end of the day, there are places that are professional that do get paid more.
All right.
I'm coming to you first for this question.
Well, no, actually, this is just for Ali Mac.
Alex, you posted a picture of a pistol pointed at the sun with the caption.
I've had enough.
Do you believe we need to take more steps to climate change or do you hate your future
children?
Well, I would like to point out the stupidity in the picture because what I was saying was
that it was quite hot out for a couple of days at which I posted that picture, which
is being taken completely out of context, devaluing the entire production quality of
the entire podcast at this point.
So I think that that's an absurd claim to me.
I don't hate my children and my stance on climate change is it exists.
Let's fucking all recycle team sees baby.
Like, no, I posted that because it was hot.
Yeah.
Thanks, buddy.
Appreciate it.
I weren't even looking at a timer when you said that.
You have that second.
Yeah, sure.
Over the time.
Okay.
This one's just for Daniel.
So Daniel, there has been some controversy with you of a old podcast called Ambulance
Sessions and some of the things that you said in that were awfully controversial.
Do you have any?
Do you disavow your skeleton in the closet right there?
Stand by the opinions that you said in Ambulance Sessions.
You have one minute to respond to that.
I believe he said, these goddamn Muslims taking my goddamn air.
Okay.
So actually, that was in jest because the way I pronounce Muslims, nobody says Muslims,
right?
So obviously it's a joke.
Muslim girls are fucking gorgeous.
They have a lot of money.
I'd love to go to Dubai.
I do not want to write that off.
I also said that Native Americans were actually homeless and they had a lower IQ.
I'm not taking that back.
I'm not stance.
I'm sorry.
The original homeless people.
Wow.
Is that your response, Mr. Delaney?
Okay.
I can say that because I'm 2% Native American according to my 23 and a.
Yeah.
I'm sure the Native American.
That's where my ADHD comes from.
I'm sure.
I'm sure you have the Native American population backing you.
Hold on.
They had some babes too though.
You are out of time, Mr. Delaney.
Now Mr. McDonald, you heard some of the statements that he just said there.
Do you agree or disagree with him or do you think he should be disavowed for the statements
that he said?
You have one minute to respond.
Well, once again, you're asking me the two extreme takes there.
I don't think he should be disavowed, but I don't agree with what he said, particularly
about the Native Americans.
Don't you agree about that?
Daniel, I'm pausing his timer.
You are talking during this.
He has a minute to talk.
I'm stating facts.
He has a minute to talk.
I believe that they have residences.
My friend told me back in the day, he said, dude, they're like missing.
How am I supposed to debate against this man?
They're missing an enzyme.
Native Americans are missing an enzyme and they can't use computers.
Actually the kid who called in right to the episode that said that the earth was flat.
Yeah.
He said that they're missing an enzyme.
I think we should all move away and they should be entitled to the land for what we've done
to them.
Dan, this question is for you.
Oh, here you go.
Here's the most profitable country on planet earth.
Why don't you just take it?
All right, I was trying to go with a wheel.
I was trying to fucking give a hot take for the end there.
That was not my name.
Just give them everything just for being here.
Dan, this question is for you.
You have one minute to respond.
Dan, you frequently troll people online and prank call retail stores under the guise of
an obese black man.
Should freedom of speech be protected no matter what the circumstance?
You have one minute to respond.
No matter what the circumstance.
I mean, if you're like running through the streets, shouting out nuclear secrets, right?
You know, and like state secrets, like it's probably not a good idea to have freedom of
speech.
Probably got to neutralize that guy.
You know, no, no matter what, neutralization.
I'm pro censorship under the right circumstances.
Yeah, definitely.
Okay.
What about?
Let me ask you this.
We operate as an organism.
What about your body neutralizes cells that are out of control?
And should be should burning, burning the American flag?
Should burning the American flag be illegal?
You know what man?
I think you have eighteen seconds.
I think the pledge of allegiance is kind of creepy.
Actually, it is a pledge of allegiance to the flag.
The mediator take is that I think the say the national anthem is beautiful and I think
that we got bus America.
Let's have a back.
I think you will stop talking.
It is now Mr. McDonald's.
That was your third question in a row.
I think that if you want to burn the American flag, I mean, it's an incredibly disgraceful
thing to do in my eyes, but I think that you should be able to do it.
I think that you should be able to do it.
I think that's right.
A free speech.
I think that should be a mandatory year in jail.
I disagree with that outright.
I think that's fucking ass nine.
That's a ton of taxpayer money that goes into that.
Hold on.
Can I take a sidebar here?
Can you stop fucking talking when they're talking?
They have a minute to respond.
Okay.
They have a fucking minute to respond.
Take your fucking microphone away.
You gave your take on what Dan said last time, though.
You did the same shit.
Listen, I will stop.
Okay.
Over 30 seconds.
Casey, don't say a fucking word.
I think he's done.
Casey, don't say a fucking word.
Don't you say a fucking word.
No, I'm done.
I am done.
This question is for the both of you.
We have a viewer of the... Oh, is he coming?
No?
No, he just told me to say it.
There's a person named Don Juan who often calls into this podcast about Buffalo Chicken
Pringles and other things.
He is on his CPAP and he is not able to afford the replacement parts for his CPAP.
What do you think about Medicaid and how Don Juan is affected by not being able to afford
his CPAP parts?
I'll give you a minute to respond to this.
He's in the corner.
He's over there.
I don't know what he's saying.
I think that's the Schizophrenia.
I can't really hear what they're saying about this shit.
It's possible someone's mother... Thank you, Don.
Thank you.
You can leave now.
You have one minute to respond.
We'll start with Alex.
We'll start with me.
Yeah, we're starting with you.
I thought we could just start with Dan on that one.
My take on it is get the man his parts.
Get the man his parts?
Get the man his fucking CPAP parts.
Free healthcare.
I like that.
I'm not saying free healthcare.
But if he's genuinely disabled, I think more what you're asking is like for people with
disabilities should that be state covered?
I believe that yes, that should be if they're actually disabled and need that shit.
Specifically Don though, should he get his parts?
I think Don needs his parts.
I find him to be a very entertaining person.
Interesting.
I love his calls.
Is that your time?
I guess so.
That's your time.
Mr. Delaney, you seem to have known Don for a while before this.
Known very well.
Do you believe that his parts should be paid for by the federal government?
You have a minute to respond.
Diabetes is going to bankrupt this country.
Diabetes and obesity.
I think I don't care about right now we have to pay for his parts.
We're not going to let him die.
That's not how we do things in this country.
But we have to start giving tax breaks for people that take care of their health.
Some incentive because right now it's literally putting us on a crash course to bankrupt this
country.
That's a good idea.
A large portion of our national debt comes to health care.
So you're saying let's let the diabetics die.
I did not say that.
No, I did not say that.
We help people in this country.
That's what we do.
We're not going to let people die.
But we have to have a plan for the future.
You just shifted right into politician mode there.
Is that your time, Mr. Delaney?
Yeah, I'm good.
I tried to paraphrase your take a shitty way.
What do you think of that?
Don, Don, you're still in the room with us?
If I can be getting some tax breaks for losing some of your power.
Don, what do you think of that response?
I'm not eating apples and shit.
That's like one of the generous shit.
That should be crazy.
Yeah, I'd be liking that, Don.
I'm going to vote for that, Don.
Dude, he is...
Really?
Thanks, Don.
I think Don just wants his pringles.
That's a pretty out of character take from Don there.
Alibeck, should the US financially support Ukraine and Israel or support other countries
in battle?
Absolutely fucking not.
You have one minute to respond.
Absolutely fucking not.
And this is my completely politically uninformed opinion here.
Uninformed opinion.
I don't think that we need to be doing anything in the Middle East.
Why are we over there?
I get it.
We like supporting them and all that stuff.
We hate Russia.
Do you think the US should support any other countries in war?
I mean, I think if it poses a threat to us...
Yeah, thanks for the fucking timer.
Appreciate it.
I don't fucking know.
I'm not well-informed enough to make opinions on this shit, dude.
How about you, Dan?
Hold on, hold on.
You have one minute to respond, Dan.
Do you think the United States should financially support Ukraine and Israel or support other
countries in battle?
Absolutely not, because one of the other things that's going to bankrupt our country is Social
Security.
Right?
People, the boomers, it's a transfer of wealth to the boomers.
Right now, people, it doesn't matter how much money you make, you're getting a $1,500 check
for over 65 years old.
All right?
That's another thing that's going to bankrupt this country.
But there's a certain point in time when we're not going to be able to afford that.
For people in our own country, they're not going to get Social Security.
We're not getting Social Security.
You're not getting it.
Nobody at this table is getting Social Security.
Another thing that the boomers have.
But we're giving money to Ukraine?
Fuck Ukraine.
Like, I'm not going to say fuck Israel.
I like Israel.
But I mean, still, we shouldn't be giving them any money, but we don't really give Israel
all.
Should we support any other countries in battle?
Yeah, we should support them, but we shouldn't just give them a blank check.
Right?
Because right now, what we have...
Ten seconds.
All right.
No, give me some more time on the time.
Ten seconds, Daniel.
Ten seconds.
All right.
So, the United States operates as a pyramid scheme that takes money from W-2 employees,
moves it up the pyramid into military contractors, turns it into bombs, and drops it on brown
people.
He's like the time Nazi.
All right, Alex McDonald.
This is a question specifically for you.
In the hit podcast, the Untitled Podcast, during the theme song of every episode, we
hear, where the fuck did the pyramids come from?
We had a question about that.
What did you mean by where the fuck did the pyramids come from?
You have one minute to respond.
I would just like to say that we have no...
We have theories as to how they were made, but we don't fucking know.
So I'm not offering an answer.
I'm posing the question, where the fuck did the pyramids come from?
Because it's pretty fucking crazy we made them.
And hey, good for them.
There is ways.
We've drawn diagrams like, oh, well, they didn't have the wheel, but we did figure out
that cylinders, if we rolled them on top of a board, could get them there.
And there was a ton of fucking slaves that could heave that shit up.
It would take a long time, but that's probably how they did it, realistically.
But that is an insane amount of labor to do it.
Okay.
But yeah.
Is that your time?
Where the fuck did the pyramids come from?
I just asked the question.
Daniel, you have one minute to respond.
Where the fuck did the pyramids come from?
I think that Ali Max take on that is racist.
Because I think it's implying Egypt was a world power.
Egypt was a world power that had millions of people.
Hey, everybody, can we please not talk?
That is disrespectful.
This is a political debate.
We are not going to have people talk.
Daniel, I'm sorry.
You have a timer of 49 seconds left.
I am sorry.
Egypt was a world power that had millions of people.
I think the question where did they come from is like that's like saying, oh, could have
been these brown people over here that put them together like because there's no way
they could have done it.
You see how that comes off as racist.
I did say that they did, though.
They just use slavery to make it happen.
It was clearly the Egyptians that built.
Well, yes, I'm agreeing.
I said that they did.
So why is it a question?
Is my question.
Because you don't question it because we have no documentation of how they were actually
done.
There's no history to back this shit up.
They were they were constructed and nobody can fucking tell us how they were made.
That was 13 seconds.
Yes, but they didn't.
They never.
We don't see how they did build the people that live here.
Listen, Dan, if I believe that they did, I believe that they did.
I believe I just don't know.
This is decorum.
We need to keep the decorum civil.
OK, you're the only threat to the decorum right now.
OK, all right.
No, I got one more question.
Let me answer this.
Let me ask this question.
This one goes specifically for Daniel.
Why is it your turn to ask a question?
Fuck you.
This is this is specifically for Daniel.
You have once said that they have giant Chinese super soldiers out there to combat the Chinese
super soldiers.
Would you yourself shut up?
Would you yourself start a super soldier program in America to combat the giant Chinese super
soldiers?
You have one minute to respond.
It's already been started in the 70s.
It's been going on since the 70s.
Right now they live in underground bunkers and they procreate in underground bunkers and
their civilizations underground of super soldiers within the United States as well.
The Chinese super soldiers.
It's just one's more scary.
You know, it's like obviously there's American super soldiers, but that's not the enemy.
They're on our team.
And if there is a World War Three, you will see us using those super soldiers.
I agree.
Let's go to Ali Mack.
Should teaching religion as fact be banned in primary and high schools?
Yes.
Yes, I do believe that it should be.
I believe that it should be taught.
Damn, that's a tough one.
I think that they should be given.
He doesn't have a take on it.
No, no, no, that's not true.
That's not true.
I think that they should be given a general rundown of the most popular religions.
But it's like I feel like Christianity was pushed quite hard on me.
Wrong.
I'm not saying teaching religion.
I'm saying teaching religion as fact.
Oh, as fact.
Yeah, you can't do that.
Absolutely not.
Absolutely fucking not.
You can teach.
You can teach it in the context of a history book of here's what it is.
This is what they believe.
Many of you in the room may believe it or maybe you're part of a different religion
or you're not.
And that's OK.
That should be the take.
It should not be treated as fact.
And they should.
They should continue to teach evolution, evolution and the Big Bang Theory as far as theory.
No, because there's no theory.
I don't think it's a theory.
You got one to one.
Yeah, I wish I had those three seconds to talk.
It's kind of like the fuck.
It's kind of like would you force somebody to eat a school lunch that they didn't want?
No.
Well, pizza's on the menu.
So we're having pizza today, guys.
That's what you're having.
But I don't want pizza.
Well, we're having pizza.
OK.
No, it's just you make it an elective.
Can I bring lunch from home?
You make religion an elective.
You have multiple electives of what religion you use.
Judaism, Christianity, whatever you want.
And if you don't want to study it, you don't.
Make it an elective.
That's it.
I like it.
OK.
I got a question.
OK.
Can I get that V?
Michelle Obama.
What about him?
Oh, boy.
Oh, my God.
Holy shit.
Michelle Obama, during the 2008 to 2012 presidential reign of Mr. Obama, decided that the school
lunches in America were, quote unquote, unhealthy.
Would we do something if one of you became president to change the school lunches back
to being actually fucking edible?
OK, once again, that's not a mediator take.
Or not.
We will start with Dan.
Yeah.
So I think that if the lunch is being supplied by the school, it should be healthy.
Right.
And if you want junk food, bring it from home.
That's it.
If you're getting pumped out of the school cafeteria, they shouldn't have like mac and
cheese.
Sorry, Diler.
Stuff like that.
It's like it should just be healthy based on not even a food pyramid, but based on like
advice from nutritionists.
Yes.
So, no, bringing back junk food into the schools.
Definitely not.
It's not food.
I don't like your take, Daniel.
That's OK.
All right.
I'll give my take now.
Give you a minute there.
All right.
Fridays.
It's pizza day.
All right.
Good pizza.
All right.
I am right.
Actual pizzas Monday through Thursday.
Let's reel it back in a little bit.
Let's not go crazy.
And for the love of God, give more options for I can't say my my school did a very good
job of sourcing like locally grown vegetables and farm shit.
And that stuff was really cool.
I ate that shit all the time.
But Pizza Friday, you bet your sweet fucking ass.
I was up there for two slices.
You need it's like life.
You got to live a little bit.
You can't just go unhealthy all the time.
And a healthy option on that Friday.
Yeah, I'm all for that.
Have some tree.
But like these kids who are coming, coming to buy school that now I'm not going to finish
that actually.
I would get me canceled.
But 10 seconds.
But no, I think that I think that you've got to have a little bit of fun.
But for the most part, there should be more of support.
Local businesses get food from the farms, shit like that.
And hopefully your community can support your school with a budget to make that happen.
All right.
Over to Dan.
Yeah, I'm in it.
Over 40,000 people were killed from gun violence in 2023 with record numbers of mass shootings
happening in recent years.
Should we be doing more to reduce gun violence and have stricter gun control?
I got in a debate with somebody on Facebook about the gun laws in the UK versus the US.
And I was like, well, you know what?
The UK is the size of fucking Florida.
All right.
So it's like you can't really compare the two.
And they're like, yeah, but we had like 20 20 shootings last year in Florida had 11,000.
Yeah.
Holy shit.
We got a fucking problem.
Yeah.
Right.
That's why I like to debate people online, because it shows me a perspective sometimes
that I really didn't expect.
It's fucking bad, dude.
Remember when I looked it up?
Yeah, it's I don't remember when we looked it up, but it's fucking not good.
So yeah, something serious has to be done about it.
There just has to be a barrier to entry to getting a gun.
OK, that's it.
Not taking them away.
Just so the fucking psychopath off the street can't walk in and get a gun and start killing
people the day of.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
There has to be like a proficiency.
Five seconds.
Something like that.
All right.
I'll be back.
You're done.
All right.
So I agree with the very end of what he said, but I think that certain things like limiting
the modifications you can get on guns.
The big one in New York a handful of years ago was the Safe Act, which limited pistols
to being seven seven bullets or less.
And stuff like that, I think is useless.
Those people already have firearms.
I'm strong supporter of the Second Amendment.
We need to have firearms to prevent the government from having all the power that keeps the power
in the people to a certain extent.
But at the end of the day, yes, just a stronger barrier.
It's there needs to be a wait when you want to get a gun to when you actually get one.
And I think that the rigorous process you have to go through for like a concealed carry
and all that shit with it being as long as it is, is a good idea.
But also just like we need to be way stricter on unregistered firearms and people who commit
these crimes that didn't go through the proper channels.
They need to get fucked for that shit and they need to get fucked hard.
They need to be made an example of.
Fuck him to death.
Hey, Tyler, one more question from you and me.
One more question.
Yeah.
Oh, fuck.
I didn't think we had any.
All right.
Yeah.
Get a final question.
All right, Dan, we'll start with you.
What group of people would you eliminate from the population?
Oh my God.
Oh, what group of people would I eliminate?
I feel like this should just be like right off the top of my head.
I got one.
Oh, this isn't yours.
Give me a second.
I know you got to be in it.
I had to eliminate.
I don't want to give it up.
One.
It's like a Jeopardy answer, honestly.
The Irish.
Oh my God.
My goodness.
The Irish.
They're just like kind of in the way.
All of us are Irish except for you.
You're Irish and I'm Irish.
I'm Irish.
Exhibit A.
All right, Ali back.
What group of people would you eliminate?
I was going to say pedophiles because I think that we can kind of just get them out of the
way.
I think that I don't know.
I wasn't going to go after a certain ethnicity or race.
Was this supposed to be an ethnicity thing?
No, it didn't happen.
I mean, yeah, get rid of the pedophiles.
I like it.
All right, Tyler, we're going to take a vote.
What's your vote for who won?
I got one more question.
All right.
So the final and most important question, what is the greatest podcast on Spotify currently
at this point?
Joe Rogan.
I was going to say the Joe Rogan experience, even though they steal all of our fucking
ideas, whether they realize it or not.
All right.
What do you think, Tyler, who won this debate?
I don't know.
It's a tough one.
We got a vote.
I like how I like how Dan dealt with Don Juan.
They seem like they're very good friends.
He's such a great guy to have in the studio.
He really was.
It's almost like they're doing the same person.
I know they're so they're so interlinked.
I was kind of surprised with Don being OK with not getting his parts for the CPAP.
I'm not going to lie.
I didn't say that he wouldn't get his parts, but I didn't say that.
I didn't say you put words in my mouth.
I mean, I did not say that at all.
I said we can't get our nation that takes care of people.
We're going to take care of them.
Oh, I thought you said you couldn't get him his parts.
I misheard you.
For gun control reasons, I would vote for Ali Mac.
I think the fuck, bro.
All right.
And for my vote, I'll just march up to the top of Mandalay Bay and get some fucking coffee.
Just kill 40 fucking people.
I'm going to get my coffee now.
Fuck gun control, man.
My vote for this is going towards Dan.
Thanks.
We got a tie.
One to one.
Here's what we're going to do.
We're going to have our listeners vote for the winner.
Email us on total podcast.
Congratulations on the tie.
Whoever emails us first gets the final vote.
There it is.
We're going on break.
We'll be back on total podcast.
Can I send you grab your fucking cocks and grab your fucking cocks.
Welcome back to a podcast.
Do I need my headphones for this one for Jeopardy?
I don't think so.
No.
Oh, yeah.
23 time winner Tyler.
That's fucking me.
The trace of Ali Mac.
And you're now 10 time winner Dan.
Oh, yeah.
The stock man or no longer the stock man.
No, well, well, well.
He's still Dan.
I'm buying some right now.
We'll see.
We had a long conversation about stocks over the break.
Surprise surprise.
All right.
I'm getting right back into it.
I said I'm done with this.
Did you see what Nvidia's at today, man?
Got your categories.
We're all enablers here for different things.
Yeah, your categories are really are all about Clint Eastwood.
OK, Clint Eastwood.
I don't have that.
Are you kidding me?
Sky scrapers.
OK, same name cities, delicious musicians, inappropriate answers.
And I was known for.
Yeah, I don't predict a very good episode.
Dan, one last thing.
All right, let's do Clint Eastwood.
No, not Clint Eastwood.
What was the one after that?
Sky scrapers.
200.
The current tallest building in the world is the Burj Khalifa.
Fuck.
What is Dubai located this Middle Eastern city?
Yes.
Wow.
Dan, before the question was even done, skyscrapers 400.
This became the tallest building in New York once again after the collapse of the World
Trade Center.
What is the World Trade Center one?
No.
What is the Empire State Building Empire State Building?
Right.
No, it's saying after the you love you.
First question he just kept on saying.
Everyone kept on saying, well, I'm like, I would say after the collapse, the World Trade
Center and I love this is a flawed question now because you said again, because it was
a World Trade Center the first time the Empire State Building was the tallest building.
Okay.
But it was the World Trade Center.
But he did.
And then it fell and they rebuilt the World Trade Center.
Tallest building in the world.
Either way, I would have gotten points.
I'm talking about directly after the collapse of the World Trade Center.
Maybe specify Casey.
Yeah.
I didn't get to finish the question.
It's like that question was written for Tyler.
I did get to finish the question.
You think mine.
What are the other categories would same name cities delicious musicians
inappropriate answers and I was known for the Clint Eastwood for one
two hundred for what two hundred or one?
Oh, the first one Clint says a Clint says the line.
Go ahead and make my day in this 1971 film.
What is the good, the bad and the ugly?
Nope.
Go ahead and make my day.
No.
Oh, what is dirty Harry?
Oh, yeah.
Did you know that?
I'm back.
You like fucking baked.
You know, I don't predict a good outcome.
It looks like half of what is here.
I might be able to lie on the second half usual 400.
I was just suck in the beginning and I slur up.
One the best director and best picture for this 2004 sports drama, sports drama.
Yeah, you can rescind my sports drama.
What year was it?
2004 million dollar baby.
Oh shit.
Yeah.
I was going to eat six hundred.
The protagonist of this 1990 film goes by the name Clint Eastwood disguised as real
name from the movie or the actor, the movie or back to feature three.
Yeah.
Damn it.
I would have known that one.
You know that that's super easy.
He's like, what's your name?
He's like, uh, what is what?
Eastwood.
I've never seen a movie.
Yeah.
Good movie.
800 800.
This virtual band released a song named Clint Eastwood in 2001.
What is gorilla?
Tyler do.
Holy hell, Mr. Eastwood for one thousand, one thousand.
I'm going to get back in this damn Clint directed this 2014 biographical film about the late
Navy SEAL Chris Kyle.
What is American sniper?
Yeah.
Fuck.
Fucking American liar.
Fuck.
Yeah.
Such an American liar.
More like you got skyscrapers, skyscrapers.
Give it to me.
Six hundred.
The Trump International Hotel and Tower is a skyscraper completed in 2009, located along
a river in the city.
There's a couple of them.
Not skyscraper hotel.
Yeah, I'm not comfortable.
Trump International Hotel and Tower located along a river.
Yeah.
I mean, there's got to be one.
No, it's a specific one that was fucking completed in what year?
2009.
Yeah, I'm not just Chicago.
OK, good.
I was not thinking Chicago.
What skyscrapers?
Yeah, I was just fucking do skyscrapers for 800.
You got up to a thousand.
They've got 800 times got fourteen hundred.
I'm at zero.
I'll do four hundred.
This country has by far the most skyscrapers defined as buildings over three hundred fifty
meters has the most.
Yeah.
What is the United States?
What country or city?
China.
Oh, I was going to fucking answer that.
God damn it.
No, you couldn't.
All right.
Damn it.
Dan, Dan, fuck.
What is the number of skyscrapers, 1000, the new one World Trade Center topped out
a height of this many feet, 77, it was mine, 17, 76, five, it's six, it was number five.
Nobody's number five.
It was me.
It was seven.
76 feet.
God damn it.
You got same name cities, delicious musicians, inappropriate answers and I was known for.
I'm going to do it appropriately and I want to figure out that is 200 in swimming.
The individual medley consists of the backstroke butterfly freestyle and this stroke.
What is breaststroke?
Yeah, I already said that one.
I lose.
We'll do inappropriate for 400.
600.
What's everybody else?
Dan has 400.
I have 2600.
Yeah, I'll do 500.
This small Asian dog breed traces its origins to the region of Tibet.
What is weiner dog?
Oh no.
Shit.
Do what he got 500.
Weiner dog.
Come from inappropriate answers.
Weiner dog for 600.
Yeah.
Make sure to wear a rubber when visiting this Thai city.
Bangkok.
Nice.
I'm back in.
I only.
Bangkok and Bangkok.
Stop.
Same spot.
I'm not throwing a minute with the shlong and hard car.
My picture magic.
Don Juan man after Henny with a coconut smile.
I just pick up the motherfucking phone and dial.
I'm in a big ass sack.
I'm playing in this dick like a new jack.
For 800.
Chicago bears Hall of Famer in the 1970s who was considered one of the best.
Dick Buccus.
Dick Pup kiss.
Oh fuck.
Chicago.
I thought it was the Chicago Cubs.
I fucking knew it was Dick Buccus.
I'm going to get in this game.
Easy.
You're pulling the fucking thing off the table.
OK.
For 1000.
When watching this 2015 sitcom, you might end up a creek without a paddle.
Shit.
What is shit's Creek?
Yeah.
For a thousand.
That's the thousand dollar question.
Why'd you buzz in then?
Because fuck you.
Tyler got same name cities, delicious musicians, and I was known for.
We'll do the most musicians for two.
Stop.
Stand by 200.
No, wait, wait, wait.
There you go.
You might use this Eric Clapton band laying up your coffee.
What is cream?
Damn.
That was close.
Danced it.
Bands.
400.
This American funk rock band sounds as if they test high on the school of scale.
What is the red hot cherry peppers?
Oh, shit.
Shit.
Yeah.
Fuck me.
I knew that one.
Fuck me.
Fuck.
Bands.
600.
This well seasoned hip hop duo was the first female rap act.
What is salt and pepper?
Oh, shit.
Fuck.
To achieve them in gold status.
Fuck.
We'll do.
How many do we got left in this category?
800 and 1000.
This new metal band shares its name with a cash crop made of what is corn with a K.
Yes.
The fuck?
Native to North America.
How did you know that?
Because he said fucking this cash crop that was made.
Say the question again, Casey.
This new metal band shares its name with the cash crop natives North America.
You didn't even say cash crop before he answered.
He said this new metal band.
Yeah.
Information fucking new metal band that is most associated.
Dan's got a point here.
I thought the same thing.
I don't think Dan knows the category is called delicious musicians.
It's called delicious musicians and it's about food and a new metal band.
That's not enough information.
A new metal band based on fucking food.
That's fucking corn.
I don't think.
I think I don't know where he got the answer.
Wasn't there.
There isn't enough information.
I was not.
I agree.
Dan, we're playing under fucking bullshit.
He's the answer wasn't up there.
They're playing on protest.
Unbelievable.
That's horse shit.
Well, they're fucking delicious.
A thousand.
This pop punk band often reminisces about what life was like in the mid 80s.
I was like, you got same name cities and I was known for I was known for 200 filmmaker
known for directing the six sons, the village split and unbreakable.
What is M night Shyamalan known for?
400 rock band and known for their hits like Heartbreaker, Cashmere and Black Dog.
Dan's same category.
Hold on.
Okay.
Six hundred governor lending his name to the bridge that goes from Tarrytown to Nyack,
New York.
What is Cuomo?
Be more specific.
What is my own?
Who gets that?
Well, I give it to Dan, but Tyler's and get any points off whatever whatever Dan's pick
same category 800 physicists who developed the first nuclear weapons in the 1940s.
What is Oppenheimer?
Yeah, Tyler do this for a thousand.
Why did I tell her your president with a Washington DC airport named after him?
What is FDR?
No, Reagan, Ronald Reagan.
Yeah, that's the wrong Reagan.
Yeah, Dan.
I was going to be J.
I got a question like wait.
That's New York.
I know what is the military base.
I will give anybody.
I'll give them four hundred of my points.
If you can name the military base across the river, the river, yeah, the Pentagon,
no, the military airport across the river from Reagan International.
I give you three hundred points of my point.
What if I get it?
Well, you can answer for anybody.
Is it named after our president still or is it?
Yeah, yeah, it's the president.
I don't like the way you said it is.
I don't know.
I'll I'll.
Oh, maybe it's not a president.
I'd like to know.
Now I think about it.
What is it?
Andrews Air Force Base.
It's literally you can like you could come off the runway on one and just land on the
other one.
Really?
Yeah.
And you got same name cities for the full category.
Most of the points that we got so far, though, they always got three thousand.
Sounds like you've done that flight.
It's got three thousand.
Tyler's got forty five hundred.
I'm at twenty four hundred.
I'm back in baby.
Everybody slept on me.
And you want lower high.
Lower high.
Yeah, fine.
Whatever.
Let's just do a hundred.
This New York City located near Utica shares its name with a European European city and
former empire.
What is wrong?
So it's a.
Four hundred this capital of Costa Rica shares its name with a California City in Silicon
Valley.
No, I can't say it again, say it again, say it again.
The question the capital of Costa Rica shares its name with the California city
and Silicon Valley.
I don't want to fuck it up.
Fuck.
There's too many on San Jose.
Fuck.
Oh, thank God.
Dan's big same category.
Sorry.
Stop for 600.
It doesn't matter.
Anyways, you got thirty two hundred.
I'll do three hundred three hundred four hundred four hundred.
Yeah, these cities are the largest in both Maine and Oregon, although neither
are the capital.
Focke is this a day and a man with me on it.
God damn it.
Give me that question.
That was an easy question, dude.
Fine question.
Oh, Dan, for 800, this deep southern city was the target of civil rights
protests and riots in 1963 after a bombing targeting black leaders shares
its name with an English city.
Fuck.
My brain is breaking.
Say it again.
This deep south city was target of civil rights protests and riots in 1963
after a bombing targeting black leaders.
I buzzed in shares its name with an English city.
What is Louisville?
No.
Fuck.
I don't know.
It was Birmingham.
Thanks.
Yeah, I should have dodged that bullet.
That was a stupid.
That was a stupid fucking.
He just finally for a little sounded right.
Yeah, only for a thousand.
This major Dutch city shares its name with a suburb of Schenectady, New York.
What is Rotterdam?
Rotterdam.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
I'm a set.
And it's a close one.
Dan's got forty six hundred times got forty five hundred.
Oh, yeah.
I was in it until that last question.
That was fucking stupid for me to buzz in there.
I still would have been in it.
Your category is geography.
God damn it.
It's just a meme at this point.
Maybe you guys would start learning geography.
None of us are going to get it.
Which makes the wagers really fun because it's going to come down to who wagers
the right amount.
I don't think either of you are going to get it.
And I'm certainly not.
No, no.
I'm going to bet.
Ali back still technically has a shot.
If if he bet it all and got thirty two hundred and Tyler and Dan lost,
like more than twelve hundred, Ali Mac would win.
You hear that, boys?
I got it.
I would have had a much better shot if I didn't fucking buzz in with Louisville.
I still think that was smart, though.
Like I did connect the dots on the fucking British thing, too.
Fucking.
Close.
Damn, thinking hard about it.
This is a wager.
Casey, can I get that vape perchance?
I need to de-stress from my.
Jeopardy blunders, as per usual.
I was trying to decide.
What Tyler, but.
This is a poor decision, Tyler.
You give him all the time he needs.
That's pretty fucking funny.
Oh, my Lord. OK.
I got the answer.
Question is.
Name three of the four countries or subdivisions that make up the United Kingdom.
How many? Three of the four.
What fuck that make up what the United Kingdom?
Oh, fuck me.
Name three of the four countries or subdivisions that make up the United Kingdom.
I got to.
Are we talking present day?
Yeah.
Wait, wait, subdivisions to.
Well, they're technically countries, but the United Kingdom is a country,
but it has like four countries within it.
Fuck me, man.
OK, give me a minute here.
Um.
I got to.
I mean, realistically, I only have one and the second one's already a reach,
but I feel like I can come up with the third.
The third.
Tough question, I guess, if you're not from the United Kingdom,
if you are from the United Kingdom, email us.
Go fuck yourself.
Untitled podcast, 73 at GMAT.com.
And don't forget to vote for the winner of the bait.
Only one person's vote matters.
Fuck me.
Fuck it. That's what I'm going with.
I know this third one's wrong.
Actually, I think my second two are wrong.
I'm fairly certain that third one is a city.
Yeah, that's the problem.
I'm fairly certain it's a city.
Could it go to the person who's closest?
And also, I was mailing it in on my second guest, too,
but I had nothing better to fill the spot, so I just sent it.
It's probably wrong.
Pretty sure it's its own thing.
I think.
All right, here I'm sending.
All right, I got your answers.
Got Ali Max says, what is Britain, Ireland and Liverpool?
He better.
Liverpool?
Dude, I had nothing else.
I had nothing else.
I couldn't think of anything.
Tyler says, was England, Ireland and Scotland?
No, wow.
He bet 200.
He's down to 4300.
Oh, shit.
It's all down to dad.
Dan says, wait, I'm rooting for you, man.
I'm rooting for you.
Dan says, what is Ireland, England and Scotland?
Oh, no.
And he bet he bet zero dollars.
Dad, four six hundred dollars.
Dan wins.
Say it again.
Dan wins.
Say it again.
Oh my God.
Say it again.
So the answer was England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Yeah, it's not Ireland, it's North Ireland.
That still fucking counts.
No, Ireland is completely separate.
Because they have like a fucking revolution.
Protest, protest.
I'm protesting. Dan, can we protest?
North Ireland is part of the UK.
Ireland is not part of the UK because we had a fucking revolution, boy.
That's true.
That's true. And I guessed Ireland too.
But I got to agree with that.
There is a very sharp distinction to be made between Ireland and North Ireland.
It wasn't the fucking territory or the country.
I asked you this.
And you said, no, they're technically countries.
So I said fucking Ireland because I thought that encompassed Northern fucking Ireland.
I said the same thing, Tyler.
I said the same thing.
I just threw in Liverpool.
How do you feel, Dan?
How I feel to win?
Yeah.
It feels even better than last time.
Casey, I hope you get...
I'm getting pretty used to this.
Casey, I hope you get raped.
I really do.
I hope you get raped.
Wow.
I hope you get raped.
That was a good one.
Wow. Wow.
That was a little intense.
I don't hope that, but...
Jeez.
I also do not hope that.
I hope Casey does not get raped.
Dude, that was down to the wire.
I WANNA FUCKING WON!
IF YOU FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER DID NOT SAY
I TACTICALLY ATTACKED A NORTHERN ISLAND WHILE RUBBING YOUR FUCKING NIPPLES LIKE A FUCKING
GOD DAMN DEGENERATE.
Tyler, if you look it up, the Northern Ireland is part of the UK.
And Ireland is a god.
Oh my god.
Fucking degenerate.
Oh.
Tyler is angry tonight.
I hope he gets thrown to a fucking wood shipper.
Oh my god.
And survive.
Alright.
If you like this episode, email us.
Loving time winner!
What?
Loving time winner.
Wow, you're only fucking half, not even half of the way.
Are we gonna end it here?
No, I think this is...
This is where things turn for Tyler.
I don't know.
Really?
You think you're turning a corner?
What is go fuck yourself, Casey?
Yup.
Alright, like that.
You definitely got the wagering game down, Pat.
I don't know if I have it down, Pat.
I just knew I didn't know geography.
So I wasn't gonna wager anything.
That was a clutch bet right there.
That should have been fucking my win!
I was so tempted to bet nothing.
Because I was like, these two could both go really heavy on the wager and fucking blow it.
Right.
If I'm just sitting there at 1600, I could cruise out of here with a win.
I should have done it.
I made myself look like an idiot fucking Liverpool.
Liverpool.
You know, I just want to say before we close it up...
We haven't done anything spooky in a while.
That's true.
Oh yeah.
There's been no spooky shit.
I mean, yeah.
We were supposed to go to the fucking conjuring house.
Oh yeah, we should do that.
We should probably do that in like September or October.
I'm missing the spooky shit, dude.
Dude, our podcast used to be about fucking conspiracy theories and spooky shit.
And it's just devolved into fucking politics and anger.
Politics and jeopardy.
Yeah.
I mean, it is a very, you know, political time in America.
Can we go back to the fucking fact that Jimmy Carter said that he saw a UFO?
Did he?
That's an actual fact.
Jimmy Carter is the only president to say that he's seen a UFO.
I don't think he's the only one.
There is...
I think there was another one that called one into the police.
Jimmy Carter.
It was Jimmy Carter.
Was it?
Yeah.
Oh.
Our favorite president of all time.
I thought they figured out that it was Venus or something.
No, it's our favorite president of all time, Jimmy Carter, saw a UFO.
No shit.
Yeah.
Shit.
Damn.
Yeah, I was thinking that happened.
I hope he makes it till October 1st.
Why?
Because that's his 100th birthday.
Damn.
Is it?
Yeah.
Oh my God.
Wow.
This guy is just fucking hanging on for dear life.
I hope he stays until November so I can vote for him as president.
But, see, this is part of the problem, dude.
All right?
These fucking boomers are living so long.
He's before the boomers.
And they're getting all the money, right?
He's a silent generation.
Yeah.
It's just, dude, this whole...
Look, people are supposed to die at some point.
Otherwise, if they don't die, they just keep taking resources from the younger generations.
I actually think COVID may have been something developed by the Earth to just be like,
dude, we got to unload some of these fucking boomers, dude.
Yeah.
It's like Japan.
They have a problem with people living too long.
And now there's just like half the population is over 80.
But they also don't repopulate either.
All the people in Japan aren't repopulating.
Right.
They're like incels, all of them.
Dude, they should just be banging bitches nonstop.
No, they're actually giving visas to Americans to get fucking girls pregnant.
Y'all, I'll say something off the air.
When are we going?
No, but they're actually giving visas to Americans to go over.
They're called pregnancy visas and they're told to get laid as many times as you can
to fucking do this shit.
The land of hundred and ten pound girls with black hair.
I just want to read you something, Dan.
What?
When in the course of human events becomes necessary, I can't read that.
That's too cursive for me.
Well said, Casey.
I can fucking read cursive.
Where do you want to read?
The first sentence?
For one, people to dissolve the patriarchal bonds which have connected them with another.
And two.
What?
Oh, no shit.
Tyler.
I'll read it.
I'm going to look it up online.
What's the first line?
What do you mean?
Were you reading the first line when it becomes the?
Yeah, this is fucking weird.
It's really what in the course of human events it becomes necessary for our one people to
dissolve the political bands.
It's not patriarchy.
It's political political bands which have connected them to with another and two should
declare the causes of which no, no.
And it's to assume along the powers of earth, separate and equal station.
Does it say that was this separate and eat like in my then there's a line that says we
hold these truths to be.
Yes, that meant that all men are created equal.
They are endowed according to the Constitution.
They are endowed by their creator with a certain inalienable rights that among these of life,
liberty and the pursuit of happiness that these that to these two is this what we've
resorted to Tyler reading the Declaration of Independence.
This is the best we got.
This is fucking pitiful.
All right, we're going to end this up.
Talk about spooky shit.
We talked about seeing a fucking UFO.
That's not spooky.
What's spooky stuff?
Do you want to talk about ghosts then?
Yeah, let's talk about spooky shit.
Let's talk about when we are going to the conjuring house.
Yeah, let's go.
Why not?
You want to do some spooky shit?
I said I wanted to talk about spooky shit.
Then you can get some fucking bring it the fuck home with me.
We when are we going to fucking investigate your house for the fucking motorcyclist that
died?
Oh shit.
Yeah, we can do that whenever you whenever you want to be in your next episode because
I'm going to I'm going to have to like break this down after this episode.
I was going to clean so I could like pack it up and we can do the next episode at your
house.
Hell yeah.
Oh shit.
Yeah, for sure.
Be dope.
Why you clean?
What you doing down here?
No, I'm just going on vacation for two weeks, so it's a good time to do it.
Yeah.
What could we?
What are you going to bring that we could?
I don't know.
I could jerk off to fucking yeah, we're going to host or that.
Tell us about what?
Tell us about the spooky things that we're investigating at your house.
Oh, well, there's this motorcyclist that hit a barn on my property.
That's not my property.
It's the property of the apartment I live on.
I live on like this ancient fucking farm.
It's like from the eighteen fifties or something.
Oh, she like giant silos in front of my apartment and there was like a little garage in the
middle and he came around the turn drunk on his motorcycle doing like seventy miles an
hour.
Lost control.
I had a telephone pole.
It took his arm off and then he kept going into this garage and the garage caught on
fire.
So there's a bunch of like welding supplies and settling bottles and shit in there.
But yeah, no, I was what a way to go.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
His arm was the other thing.
His arm was in my yard.
Wasn't there something else to?
Yeah.
So me and my buddy were sitting out.
My buddy works with you.
We're sitting out in front of my apartment having a fire.
And well, first of all, before we get to that, my one neighbor asked me, he goes, were you
walking down the center of the road at midnight the other night?
Like with a black with a black hoodie on?
I'm like, no, no.
Like I've never seen there's somebody walking with a black hoodie down the I live in the
fucking country.
Do you have cameras?
The fuck is this is this after the accident?
Yeah.
After it.
This was like six months after it.
Maybe even longer, maybe like a year after it.
But I'm like, no, that's crazy that there's fucking people walking down the street in
the middle of the fucking country.
Oh, I actually had a spooky thing happen.
I'll tell you after this, because you want to talk about spooky stuff.
I actually had a recent spooky experience.
All right.
Good.
We'll talk about that.
So me and my buddy were out at the having a fire in front of my apartment and he's like,
dude, did I just see somebody with a hood on at the end of the driveway?
It was me.
What the fuck?
And I'm like, it was fucking me.
Where?
Like point to where you saw it.
He goes, dude, right over there.
And I'm like, that's fucking weird, dude.
Let me show you something over there.
And so I bring him over there and I show him the cross up against the tree with the kid's
hat on it.
Right.
And I'm like, fucking kid died right here.
Like that's fucking crazy.
Like he said, I saw a figure.
So if I asked him about this, he would remember this.
Yeah.
That's wild.
I got to ask him.
Yeah.
So there was another thing too, right?
Was it the place that me and Tyler went to investigate?
Well, the Christman's.
Oh, yeah.
That was the other thing that was by you.
Right.
Yeah.
That's where the kid saw the rake.
So we can investigate there.
Again, he did again.
Yeah, but we didn't see anything.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
It was cool.
I got to do it at night.
No, we did go in pitch black.
It was dark.
Like it was like pitch black.
It was, it was sunset, but I feel like if it was at night, you would get lost.
You got to stay there the entire time.
I would do it.
I'd sleep there, but I don't want my car to get towed.
Dude, I just can't believe that when I was a fucking high schooler, I would just get
stoned to no end in the middle of the fucking woods.
Our smoke spot was like two miles down a path.
And it was like, if you were high as shit, you had to find your way back to your car.
You kidding me?
I fucking.
It was like, I was playing fucking Outlast every time I got back to my car.
It was like I was in a fucking horror movie.
I was never a smoker at all.
I don't smoke weed because these degenerates.
I never smelt weed.
Just tell us about your scary story.
I want to tell you before that, like where I used to hang out when I was a kid, cause
also semi spooky.
I used to go when I was a teenager and when I was in my emo, like don't talk to me fucking
things.
I would go to the local cemetery and in the back there was an abandoned mausoleum, which
I'd climb on top of and I just hang out there and just all night just sit there fucking
on top of an abandoned as opposed to it's not like there was, there was no bodies in
it anymore.
Okay.
So like you could like, you could walk in the mausoleum.
Like I fell asleep in the mausoleum.
Typically my mausoleums aren't too active.
I'm not into the mausoleum, but the spooky thing that happened, I don't know if I told
it on the podcast yet.
If I had, you can, but my fiance and I were, were home.
It was when the Rangers were still playing the, the, uh, the Panthers in the, in the,
so it was however long ago that was.
So like what, like a month, two months ago or something.
I came in and, uh, so to preface this, I just got a giant crucifix from my grandmother at
the time, like a giant crucifix.
It's like five feet fucking tall.
That's not a joke.
I got a five foot tall crucifix.
Why did your grandma just have that hanging around?
It was my great grandfather's.
That's the most shit I've ever heard.
I can put it in someone's front lawn and light it on fire.
What's going on?
So I have it hanging over my bed.
What the fuck?
Unreal.
Before this, you are in a cult, Tyler.
I am not in a cult.
So I got that and I have a, I got a picture, a painting of, uh, our lady of sorrows, which
is, uh, Mary, but like a crying Mary photo, like a painting of, of Mary, like crying after
Jesus got like crucified.
What a great picture.
It's a really powerful backstory to that picture.
But um, I, uh, I had it and this was before I hung them up or anything.
Like this is just when I took them into my fucking house and I looked over and my fight,
my fiance said that she saw it too.
She looked over at the painting of our lady of sorrows and the eyes moved in the painting
and I'm like, Emily, did you, did you fucking see that?
She's like, did Mary's eyes just move?
I'm like, I, I think so.
And then more to this story happened.
So after that, I was like, that was real fucking weird, but we were both like super tired.
Like it was a super long day.
So I'm like, maybe we're both just kind of like, you know, when you look at an old painting,
sometimes you're like your mind plays tricks on you and stuff.
And because, you know, the, the whole thing of staring and like, it's a really like realistic
painting.
So like, when you look at it, you're like, okay, so your brain kind of like connects
things.
This, I can't explain from, from after that.
So after that, I was watching the Rangers game in the living room.
That's why I preface it with this.
So I was watching the Rangers game and you were in my house.
So you like my main living room, I was sitting in the couch that we didn't have yet, but
I like when, when you saw it, but the couch is where like the two windows are like over
here, like when like across my bathroom, I have my couch there and I have my TV over
here.
So I was sitting on that couch with like, just sitting there watching the Rangers game
and my fiance was in my bedroom, which you know, in my bedroom, I have like the two like
little like rooms off it because when you help me move, you help me move my, my, my
dresser in there.
Yeah.
So she was over by the bed where it was like in the, in the middle of the room, like right
by where like, and the door was open to like the closet area that I had with my dresser
with the mirror.
And she just goes, uh, Tyler, I'm like, yeah.
She goes, are you out in the living room?
And I go, yeah.
She just goes, cause I just saw when I was, she was putting my clothes away.
She looked up in the mirror and she saw me standing behind her and I didn't move from
the living room.
No.
And then she like, she like blinked her eyes and it was gone.
So the house you moved into is haunted.
By you.
By me.
But like, but she goes, like I was wearing this hat and I was wearing a Rangers Jersey
cause I was watching the game and she just goes, yeah, it was wearing exactly what you
were wearing, but its eyes were gone.
It was just black.
Oh shit.
Where its eyes were.
So you shouldn't investigate your house.
Yeah, but nothing weird has happened since then.
Like I lived there, like I've had a couple things happen, like, like things that could
be explained by like the house settling or something.
Like I have like a, like a, um, I have a, uh, uh, fuck, I can't talk right now.
What's the fucking, it's not a bookshelf, but like, it's kind of like a bookshelf that
you put, it's just a shelf.
I had like a shelf,
but it's not for books, it's a shelf.
You got a fucking shelf here guys.
So I have a shelf that has like, you know, just like random shit on it.
And I was in my books, not books, no books on that fucking thing.
So I was in the kitchen.
Um, I think I was making some food or something.
It was like, you know, 1am.
Um, and then I just hear, I'm like, what the fuck was that?
And I looked over and everything on my shelf just got knocked over, like everything.
And I'm like, that was weird.
And like, you have cameras.
I have cameras in my back, like the back, like entrance to my house.
I don't have them in my house.
Yeah.
I think I'm probably going to do that in a bit, but like, I was like sitting there and
I'm like, huh.
And then I just, at random times, I just get like random footsteps.
Like, it's not even my neighbor because I know my neighbors asleep because you can hear
them snoring through the floorboards.
That's good.
Wow.
Typical upstairs neighbor behavior.
Yeah.
But like, you can like, but like it's super quiet at night.
Like everything's like off.
You're just like watching the TV, like with low volume so you can like kind of hear everything
and you can hear them snoring underneath like the floorboards.
So I'm like, okay.
So he's asleep and he's not, he doesn't live with anybody.
So it's just him.
And I just hear just walking on and like, it's not downstairs.
I can hear it on my floor.
And I'm like, what the fuck?
And there's like, there's, I think there's only two more things that happened at my house
since I moved in.
And mind you, I moved in there fucking as of today.
I love how you went from having no material to this.
Just being like, all right, I got four stories, Dan, four things about because I forgot about
it until, until he's like, I want to talk about some spooky stuff.
I'm like, oh, fucking right.
My house.
Because I thought I told this story before, but apparently I didn't.
Oh yeah.
I just wanted to investigate bro.
So I was, I was in my living room again and it always happens at like, you know, 1 AM
like around that time.
And you know, like the, the porch area at my house, like when you come in through the
back door, like when you go up that spiral staircase and there's like, I'm like trying
to draw a diagram of your house.
You've gone so in depth.
It's an old house.
No idea.
Yeah.
It's, it's a, it's a relatively old house.
But they could go up the spiral staircase and then there's like a, like a porch.
It's like an enclosed porch.
Like, so I, we put a whole bunch of shit out there.
Just, it's kind of like storage right now.
But I was just sitting there and I just heard like some shuffling out and like that, like
porch area and I'm like, okay.
So I grabbed my fucking shotgun and I go out and like, typical Tyler afternoon.
I just thought, because like, I'm like, what else could be making that noise?
I thought somebody was trying to break in or something.
So I'm like, and like, I didn't remember if I locked my bottom door, but I locked my top
door.
So in my brain, the, the shuffling sound was someone trying to unlock the top door type
thing.
So I'm like, fuck.
So I go out and then I look out and I didn't get a motion alert on my phone.
So I, it nor it's pretty sensitive when somebody walks up my, my back staircase that I can
see them like on my thing.
So I'm like, okay.
No one's there.
So I looked around and two of the boxes that I had and they weren't, they weren't unpacked
at that point, switch spots.
The fuck?
Like I was like, and like, I tried to think if I fucking move the boxes, like I haven't
fucking moved these boxes in like a month.
And then I'm like, but like, I looked inside and I'm like, yeah, the, the objects that
were in this box were in this box.
So they had to switch places or somebody took all the things in this box and put them in
this box and all the things that were in this box and put them in this one, but they just
switched.
Got two theories in the box here.
Yeah.
But I was just like, but, but like the amount of one was it like the amount of shuffling
that it was, it was probably just switching.
But I'm like, what the fuck?
And then fucking, we just hear each other's voices sometimes when we're not talking.
Like that's a, that's another weird thing that happens.
Like we're just sitting there, she's asleep.
I hear her voice.
Like Mike, she's asleep in our bedroom and then I hear her voice in the kitchen and I'm
like, I have that shit happen all the time.
I just say I'm hearing it in my deaf ear.
So I, so and I can open, I open my bedroom door, which is, I don't know what the fuck
you'd call those.
Like the sliding door thing.
Yeah.
They're like, they're kind of like a French French doors.
Yeah.
French doors.
The one thing I did connect the dots on is I know I've told the story a couple of times
where I just left this detail out.
I always said like how I could hear footsteps in my house as a kid.
And I never knew like what they were from.
Like I didn't think if they were like a bad presence, but it was after like the ashes
got spread on the property or whatever.
So after that, I realized that I remember telling my brother at that time that I could
hear the footsteps in my deaf ear too.
And they were the only thing I ever heard.
So like, I remember telling him that and he was just like, but he also heard the footsteps.
It wasn't just me hearing the footsteps.
My brother can corroborate that.
He'll be a guest at some point, I'm sure.
But no, it was a, that was a weird thing that I forgot to mention because I brought this
up to him because he was talking about like, oh, I want to come on the pod.
Like let's do what we talk about.
And I just started talking to him about that story.
And he's like, you remember like, he's like, you didn't tell me because I was, I told the
story to him essentially.
And then he's like, you left out like your ear.
He's like, oh my God, I did fucking say that back then.
And then just like, I don't know if it's like a haunting or just me forgetting things with
this specific thing, but I always hang my hoodies and my coats a specific way in my
closet.
Like I have them all facing, like the hook is like, when I take it off, the hook comes
out.
Like it's like the hook goes in type thing.
So like, it's like an easier way to like do it.
And I do that every single time that I put my hoodies away and stuff.
Like I hang them all up the same exact way, so all the hooks are doing this.
I gotcha.
I don't know.
I wasn't know if I was explaining it right.
I understand.
So all the hooks are this way.
So I go to my closet one day and like four of my hoodies are facing the other way.
And like the thing is when I, when I, when I do that too, all my hoodies are facing a
certain way too.
Like the back of the, like where the hood is, is the part that's like facing me.
Could be the woman pulling them away though.
She never, she never goes in there.
Like that's like, like she just like, like we have our own closet spaces and we just
don't fuck with each other's closet spaces because she knows how particular I am with
like how I put things away.
Tyler will fucking snap.
What the fuck is this?
But are you fucking kidding me?
But it happened when she was away.
Like she was like at work and I was like doing my laundry and I was like going through, I
did like two loads.
So I hung them up and then I went back and then I hung them up again.
But when I went back, the hooks were the opposite way and the hoodies were facing out.
Like the, like the Tyler, I had a theory and I think it's going to scare you a little bit.
I think that you are being haunted by you because the one you're, I don't know if like,
this is just like multiverse Tyler fucking darkest time.
Like the shit that you're describing this ghost doing is the shit that you would do
with you to fuck with yourself.
Yeah.
You'd fuck with the door handle.
You just fuck just enough particular things up to get Tyler to get really angry about
it.
Like who the fuck put everything in this box over here?
That shit you would do is a ghost.
Like you and your girlfriend seeing you in the mirror.
I mean, albeit you didn't have eyes.
So tough blow on that one.
Yeah.
The black, the black eyes freaked me out because like, and then, you know, the tuning fork
feeling I explained to you like type thing before she even said that I instantly felt
it.
I'm like, like, I'm like something's here.
He got you.
It's your scratch.
Yeah.
It's scratch from Alan Wake, dude.
But like, I felt it.
Like I felt the fucking, the fucking feeling and he's who they'll meet when you're gone.
That's a creepy line.
That's a stone cold line.
I'm in your house.
That's essentially the, that's from a game where it's like, he gets sucked into this
place called the dark place and another version of him is released and he doesn't know who
it is at first and he asked this like present this guiding presence in this weird dark place.
He goes, who's he looking at his clone?
He goes, he's who they'll meet when you're gone.
That's kind of fucked up.
Oh my God.
He's got a dark guy called Mr. Scratch.
Fucking fucks with his wife who's still in there.
Yeah.
Dude, so I was a pretty cool plot.
I was driving out of like, I was driving with my girlfriend to a concert.
We went to go see emo night.
Yeah.
It was back when it was dark.
Tyler's in the oncoming lane.
It was in February.
And so I was pulling out and I always turn almost every single light in my house off
before I leave.
Like I turn off everything.
Cause you know, just saving power, you know, energy and stuff.
And I'm like, okay.
And I leave like my back porch light on and I leave my back staircase light on so I can
kind of like see.
And then when I go inside, I just turn, turn the rest of the lights on and the room specifically
the room where Emily saw the other me we'll call it.
Mr. Scratch.
Yeah.
This is Tyler Scratch.
I was that, that door, that, that, that room, the light was just on and I'm like, I never
turn that light on.
Well dark Tyler does.
He wanted to see what he was doing when he was fucking with your clothes.
But like, I'm like, I never turned that fucking light on.
And then when I came home, that light was off and I'm like, what the fuck dude.
But like, it's just like weird.
Like it's like shit that you can kind of be like, ah, did I actually do that type shit
or like whatever.
But like the thing that freaked me out was specifically the whole thing with, with Emily
being like, ah, are you in the living room?
I'm like, I've been in the living.
I've been watching the fucking game because it's not out of pocket for Emily to think
that you were just staring at yourself in the mirror.
We see that happen here.
So it's like, that's a reasonable behavior for you.
So I don't know if you guys know that are you in the bathroom again?
So I, I, I don't know if I talked about this on the podcast, but since we're going down
the spooky route that, that he, that Mr. Delaney wanted to talk about one of my fears, like
actually one of my fears is mirrors in dark rooms.
Like a mirror that you know is there, but you can't see it freaks me the fuck out.
Do you ever play bloody Mary? I did when I was younger, it was that, that was a terrifying
game.
It really was that dramatized music.
Good.
Actually we got a mirror right there.
What's the, what's that game that you talked about?
Oh, three Kings game.
Yeah, dude.
The three Kings game is fucking fucked up.
What's that?
I totally talked about the three Kings game or was it only on the just brush my memory
was talking about doing demon rituals in my basement, not demon ritual.
Okay.
Now I got to hear it.
I don't care if it's been told before.
No one's listening anyway.
Let me, let me, let me look up the actual rules for the three Kings game.
Dude, bloody Mary, that shit gave me like PTSD as a kid.
I remember we would dare one another to run into like the bathroom in this church, mind
you, where our before and after school program was.
And it was like, I remember I did it and I could always make it to the fourth bloody
Mary.
And then it'd be like, ah, nope.
There's going to be red eyes looking back at me from the mirror.
Dude.
So the thing is I went to a Catholic school that was an old rectory, like where I went
to school.
So it was fucking crazy because the rectory had like two bathrooms.
It had like, you know, the, the thing they, they, they, they changed it into like one
was like a one where there was a shower in it, but they changed it into another stall,
but it still had like the drain, like in like the, the, the thing.
And I was like, fuck dude.
But we played bloody Mary in an old rectory and I, it was fucking scary, dude.
I did not like that.
But like, but just going back to while I, while I look this up real quick, just like
going like a mirror in a dark room is probably one of my biggest fears.
Like I just don't like, you feel like it's a door that's open to the other side.
I just don't like it because I know like I'm looking back at myself in the mirror when
it's light, when, when the lights on, but when all the lights are off and it's a pitch
black room, but there's a mirror there.
Who's looking back at you?
I'm looking back at the type shit and that fucking, that freaks me the fuck out.
Well, if it makes you feel any better, if it's actually pitch darkness, the mirror isn't
reflecting.
So there's at least that.
Yeah.
So let's just go around one, one fucking figuring out like this real quick.
Just what's your like actual worst fears and like a description of why.
Um, well, dude, I have a couple.
I would say for me, even though it's not going to be something I'm going to have to deal
with, the thing that scares me the most to think about is the heat death of the universe.
That's your biggest fear.
Yeah.
Just knowing that at some point everything will just stop and there is no, cause the
heat death of the universe is when every atom loses its energy.
So everything is in a static state.
Every atom is just at the temperature of absolute zero.
There's no energy anywhere and you just have stagnant mass and that will just be it forever
for eternity.
That's just a horrifying thing for me to wrap my head around.
And there is a lot of evidence that supports that that would cause a big shrink after like
quintillions of years and then would result in another big bang.
That's the big bang, big crunch theory.
So I got it here.
That shit scares me.
I got a question for Dan.
What did you call Kamala Harris at the beginning of this episode?
What did I call her?
Yeah.
Something about cauliflower.
Steamed cauliflower.
If she was a male, she's just so uninteresting.
She's just a white rag.
She's just default.
It's just calorie material.
She's just blah.
She's what?
It seems cauliflower.
Yeah.
That's the name of this episode.
It should be you have one minute to respond.
I like the steamed cauliflower.
They'll get the.
I kind of like what Tyler said.
Yeah, because I know they're both high.
So you're not.
Yeah.
I don't think that'll the wake up in the morning and be like, oh, that was a great name for
the episode.
I like it though, because it's always cryptic.
Right.
You have to.
Solar plexus clown glider.
You have to listen to the episode to understand.
It's a great title.
Do you know what's at the center of our universe though?
Black hole.
We don't.
It's most likely.
Black hole.
I didn't know that.
So that's the theory.
That's the theory.
It's not like mass effect where the collector's base is actually.
Ali Mac, you know the collector's base is at the center of the galaxy.
You're thinking of the Milky Way in the center of the galaxy, yes.
The center of the universe.
We don't know where that is.
We have no idea what our position is.
The center of the Milky Way is the collector base, Ali Mac.
The galaxy, yes.
Yes, I know.
It's the collector's base.
Yes.
Isn't it insane to think though that like we're here on the Milky Way, right?
Like we're all here.
Like obviously got here somehow.
Like life was made here.
Where's the next closest life, dude?
Yeah.
And the Andromeda galaxy.
It is out there.
The closest galaxy to the Milky Way is the Andromeda galaxy, which appears just slightly
larger than a star.
Everyone looked at it with a telescope.
You can see it in a telescope, but it is so tiny.
I used to think it was like a constellation out there.
It's not.
Andromeda is so tiny and far away from us.
It's nowhere that we found so far.
We haven't found any life anywhere except here.
We haven't really looked though either.
There's a very, very large chance that life is much more common than we think it is.
So just getting back on track.
Isn't that wild to think?
Dan, what's your worst fear?
Yeah.
You got me going down this rabbit hole.
Damn it.
I also have the Fermi paradox.
I also have the demon ritual fucking thing too that you probably want to hear about.
Let me think about that because there is, go on with your thing and I'll think about
my worst fear.
Casey, just while we're doing this, what's your worst fear?
Dogs?
I'm very claustrophobic.
So being locked in like a very small space, like a fucking...
Cave.
Yeah.
If you got buried alive, that's got to be the worst fear then.
That would be awful.
You also don't like dogs.
You're scared of dogs.
Yeah, but I'm way more claustrophobic.
So what I'm about to share with you today is one of the many relatively safe ways which
you can access but not quite enter a place I call the shadow side.
It's an effective...
The shadow side.
And its effectiveness depends on how seriously you take it.
The upside.
Your mileage may vary.
I won't tell you that you shouldn't be afraid of the shadow side.
Chances are you've already seen it.
After all, merely think about it.
It was just a recurring dream.
I can tell you that there is no need to be ignorantly afraid of it.
There is a difference.
Ignorance fuels fear and fear can give you blah, blah, blah.
If you do drugs or alcohol the night of this ritual, you're going to have a bad time.
Me and Aliexpress are fucked.
You're going to have to...
I would be sober for this.
I can be sober.
If you're going through some serious issues in your life or not feeling mentally or spiritually
stable or if you're doing this just to escape, you're going to have a bad time.
So I also check that box.
And if you don't follow my instructions, particularly multiple backups I give you, which in case
trust me are there for a reason, you're going to have a really bad time.
The name of this game is the Three Kings game.
What you'll need.
A very large and empty quiet room, preferably without windows.
If windows exist, you'll be able to cover them to ensure total darkness.
Basements are preferred and usually work well if they're roomy enough.
Second thing you'll need is a pack of candles.
You'll only use one if all goes well and a lighter.
A bucket of water and a mug.
A fan.
Two large mirrors like the ones on your dresser.
Don't worry, they won't be harmed.
Or if they do, that'll be the least of your concerns.
Three chairs.
An alarm clock.
An active cell phone.
It sounds like an SCP or a creepypasta.
An active cell phone.
Don't forget to charge the battery.
A loved one who's willing to follow the rules and go along with you.
And a small toy that you hold dearly from your childhood.
To start this, set up around 11 p.m. and pull one chair in the center of the room facing
north, which is important.
The other two chairs exactly to the left and right facing your throne.
The distance between your throne and that of the queen and the fool should be about
the length of your arm to each side.
More or less, place two large mirrors on the queen.
Okay.
Place two large mirrors on the queen and fool's chairs to the left and right of you.
Facing you and each other.
To try your best.
So do you do this alone?
You sit alone in the basement like this, but you have your loved one around to help you
just in case.
Okay.
And try your best to have them stand at a 90 degree angle or else you might get more
or less than three kings.
If you sit on your throne facing straight ahead north, you should be able to perceive
your own reflection within each of the two mirrors without actually having to turn your
head nor your eyes to do so.
If you see your own reflection out of the corner of your eye that's just barely there,
you've done it right.
Place the bucket of water in the mug in front of you.
It's barely out of reach.
Place the fan behind you.
Turn it on.
Don't set it to maximum power.
Medium or low is probably enough.
Leave it on.
Turn off your lights and leave the door open and go to your bedroom.
Set the candles side by side and set your candles by the side of your bed next to your
lighter and your alarm clock and keep your cell phone.
Leave it charging.
Set your alarm for 3.30 AM.
Turn off the lights and sleep while holding your power object, AKA your childhood toy
that you hold dearly, and get some rest.
Wake up at 3.30 AM with your alarm clock.
Turn it off, but don't turn on the light.
You have exactly three minutes to light your candle, grab your cell phone, and make your
way to the dark room and sit in your throne.
You have to be seated by exactly 3.33 AM.
Don't forget your stuffed animal.
Check for potential red flags.
If your cell phone didn't charge for whatever reason, don't continue the ritual.
If the alarm didn't go off at exactly 3.30 AM, do not continue the ritual.
If you find the dark room door closed, remember that you left it open.
Abort the mission.
If the fan is turned off that you left on, abort the mission.
Side note, if you're about to abort, do this to do any of the above.
Leave the house with your loved one.
Go to a hotel.
There's no need to run.
Do you have to grab your jacket and your keys and whatnot, but leave after...but leave.
After 6 AM, the coast should in fact be clear.
If all goes as according to plan, you can proceed to take your throne.
Do not look directly at either of the two mirrors beside you.
Do not let the candle go out by the fan behind you.
You must protect the candle with your body, which is standing in between.
There's a reason for this, as you'll soon see.
Look straight ahead at the darkness, not the candle, not the mirrors.
Just straight ahead.
Eagle-eyed readers should surely notice that I said during the setup which chair was the
queen and which chair was the fool, but that's because it's your job to find out.
From their point of view, you are either their queen or their fool.
Hence, there are three kings in the room.
I won't spoil what happens next, blah blah blah.
Suffice to say, you won't be alone.
If you have questions, you'll get answers, sometimes in the form of new questions.
Just try to stay put and don't move.
Do not look directly at either mirror nor the candle.
Just straight ahead.
You need to wait until 434, and by 434, it's all over.
It's okay to tremble a little bit.
Just try not to, because the effects of the ritual or anything, it's just a pussy thing
to do while in polite company.
Did your candle go out?
That's what the fan's for.
You're protecting the candle with your body, but if your body were to move suddenly and
the fan would turn off the candle, that's backup number one.
Your loved one is backup number two.
At 434, she should be able to come into your room and call your name.
If that doesn't work, she has to call your cell phone, and if that doesn't work, she
has a glass of water in the bucket.
She can't touch you.
That's a newbie mistake.
Backup number three is your toy or stuffed animal.
Whatever object of strength you have, you have to show it.
It'll show you the way back if you follow it.
Multiple backups.
You got to be a boy scout when you do these things.
If you half ass it, half ass it all the way or it won't work.
You have to take it seriously or else it won't work, and you have to be seriously prepared
for the consequences.
When you are sitting there-
Who came up with this?
It was actually an old Wiccan game that they had back in the fucking 1500s.
The whole effects during that game, that's just how you play it, is you're sitting there
and you have them two mirrors beside you, because I've read a whole bunch of experiences
with it, and you have them in your peripheral vision so you kind of see-
You laid that out.
I'm not being a dick, but I understood it.
When you're doing that, the chairs next to you, you'll start hearing two voices talking
to you.
One is going to be a kind voice that's telling you things-
What if you're deaf in one ear?
If you're deaf in one ear, you probably can't play this game.
Yeah, I don't think I can play this game.
The other ear, it's going to be an aggressive, angry person yelling at you, but you can ask
questions to either one, and only one of them is going to tell you the actual answer.
The other one's going to yell at you or tell you a sweet lie type thing.
You just keep on hearing these two voices talking to you back and forth, but if you
look in the mirror, you'll see whichever one, or you look side to side, you can see-
If you look at either one of them, you're fucked.
The whole thing is you're trying to gain knowledge by talking to two different people that are
two different spirits, and you can ask questions, and you're trying just to get information,
but to the point where you're sitting there in the dark fucking trying to talk to the
fuck-
I think you're going to freak yourself out enough.
If you're taking that seriously, you're going to coax yourself into seeing shit, even if
it's not there though.
That's where I'm at.
Dude, do you remember the auditory hallucination I told you I had?
Yeah.
I came back from New York City.
Wait a minute.
Which one was this?
After I went to the Ripley's Believe It or Not Museum.
I don't think you told us on podcast.
I think I did.
I'll just reiterate real quick.
I was walking by.
I had a lot of time to kill before I caught my bus back to Albany.
I was walking by Ripley's Believe It or Not.
It's down towards Times Square.
It's next to Madame Tussauds, the Wax Museum and shit.
There's this guy out front that had a voodoo doll, and he was doing some magic trick with
a voodoo doll.
I was like, that's fucking weird.
I was super sleep deprived.
I had been up for 24 hours.
There's some feeling that just stuck with me all the way home after watching that.
I don't know what he was doing with it.
Some fucking magic trick.
I got home and I fell asleep with my eyes open in my bed with my light on.
Oh, so you had sleep paralysis type thing.
Right.
I heard a voice that started in this ear, and I heard another voice in this ear.
This one said, should we fuck with him?
This one's like, yeah, let's fuck with it.
It sounded like, after they said that, it sounded like a cafeteria.
It just got louder and louder and louder and louder until I fucking finally just snapped
out of it.
I was like, dude, I went and I looked out my back window, like on my house, like in
my backyard.
It was like dawn.
I was like, what the fuck was that?
I was like, dude, do I have to go talk to a fucking psychiatrist?
It sounds like sleep paralysis to me.
Well, that's what it was.
I looked it up and that's super common.
Some people only get auditory hallucinations with sleep paralysis.
Yeah.
I know I've talked about the fucking auditory hallucinations I had on Adderall, and they
were loud and they were insomnia induced and they were fucking freaky.
I knew they were in my head the whole time too.
It was just like, how the fuck do I sleep, you motherfucker?
It was the same thing.
It was the crowded cafeteria.
No distinguishable voices to speak of.
It was just garbled white noise almost.
Exactly.
I actually had a pretty creepy fucking sleep paralysis experience at my house that I currently
live in now because I lived in my parents' house till last year.
But I was sleeping and every time that I sleep on my back, I either have a nightmare or sleep
paralysis.
I can't sleep on my back.
But it was one of those days where you just kind of fall back in the bed and you're done
instantly.
Sleep on your cock.
I actually do sleep on the front of me or on the side of me constantly.
That's just how I sleep.
But I remember I was sleeping and mind you, my bed is pinned against a wall.
It's all the way to the end.
That's it.
Pinned.
I don't know the whole story because the wall is right there.
But I was sleeping and my fiance went to work or something.
But this was during a day.
My eyes open and I'm looking up at my ceiling and my fans going out and stuff.
I'm like, okay.
Then I realized I couldn't move.
I'm like, so this is probably sleep paralysis.
Then I saw a fucking arm come out of the wall behind me and another arm come out.
Then I see it looked like somebody was pulling themselves through the fucking wall.
I just saw a fucking...
The arm came out upside down and twitched and did this.
The other arm came out and fucking twitched and then fucking did this.
Just fucking something started pulling itself out from my wall.
I was like, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.
Then I just see a fucking torso start coming out of the wall with the head.
The head was up like this so all I could see was a fucking pure white torso.
It was fucking emaciated.
It was only skin, bone, and you could see organs and shit.
Not actually see it, but you know what I mean.
It's so skinny that you could see it.
Its head did a snapping motion like this down.
It looked down and it only had a mouth and its mouth was up to here and it had fucking
needles for teeth.
They had no eyes or fucking nose.
There was a completely white face that was attached to the thing.
Dude, fuck your imagination, bro.
It opened up its mouth and it had fucking needles for teeth.
I just go, fuck.
I woke up and nothing.
I was like, holy shit.
Yeah, that's the shit I'd see in my dreams.
Yeah, dude, that was fucked up.
Not awake though.
Yeah, dude.
In sleep paralysis, you're not really awake.
It's like the in-between type thing.
So I was just like, what the fuck was that, dude?
And I was like, fuck.
And I looked over and it was like 3 PM.
I'm like, Jesus fucking Christ, what the fuck?
I went to sleep probably 6 AM because I just got home from work.
No, I went 7 AM.
I just got home from work and I just laid down and just fucking crashed and woke up
at 3 and whenever that happened, I don't know what time that was.
But it was daylight.
You could see it peek, the light coming through the curtains that I have.
It doesn't completely black out the room, but it does it enough where you can sleep.
Wow.
Yeah, so it's fucking creepy.
Dude, we didn't have Jeff tell his fucking creepy story last time he was here.
I'll tell it, but then we'll have him back on.
He'll be back on.
Yeah, and he can tell the actual, he tells it better than I'm going to tell it.
But his parents, maybe I did tell us.
No, I think he told it the one with the with their on the back road, like in the other
country.
Yeah, you did.
Yeah, no, no, his parents were coming home from church.
Yeah, he did.
This is here.
Yeah.
And the hat man.
Yeah, yeah.
He was talking about his parents, like stopping.
This was a Jeff episode.
I wasn't here for that and what happened?
I don't remember actually.
So I'll give you the hat man.
So OK, I'll tell you again just in case.
Like in case it's different, because there was the one with the basket of snakes.
Yeah, that's the one I did.
Baby basket.
Yeah, this is different.
His parents were coming home from our church that we go to and there was a guy walking
down the road.
It was like raining a little bit from what I remember from the story.
And there's a guy walking down the road in a trench coat and he had a hat on like the
brim hat.
Yeah, like the brim hat, like the fucking hat man.
And they said that this guy Casey, you jumped in the air.
You're breathing is fucking nuts, dude.
You're going.
I'm sorry.
That was just really bothering me.
I have a deviated septum.
Good for you from cocaine.
So you called the temps.
They said he was he was on one side of the road, right?
This guy walking down the street and he jumped in the air and landed on the other side of
the road and just kept walking.
That's nuts.
And his mom said to his dad, she's like, did you just see that?
And he's like, yeah.
What was that?
Like, dude, just just a guy just walking and then goes like this to the other side of the
road and just keeps walking.
It's almost like Spring Heel Jack, the old fucking legend in fucking London, like back
in the Victorian Spring Heel Jack.
You would know that.
You never heard of Spring Heel Jack?
No.
So Spring Heel Jack was like a fucking like, I guess, kind of look this shit up.
I guess he was like a kind of cryptid, but also maybe a person or a demon in like Victorian
England.
And I don't remember exactly what he did like to people and stuff, or he would just
jump scene and stuff, but like he would like jump like insane amounts of time, like insane
amounts of height, like inhuman height.
Like he'd do something fucking and then just jump like fucking like all over the place
and he just boom.
And they're like, like he just kept like not being able to be caught because he just jumped
like fucking 40 feet in the air.
Oh my God.
That's some X-Files shit.
Yeah.
No, he kind of looks like him too.
Oh my God, dude.
You're not joking.
Yeah.
That's a trench coat, the top hat.
It just suddenly chills up my spine, dude.
That's like exactly what he fucking described.
Yeah, dude.
It's a fucking dude that like jumps like super far and shit.
I love how that's like the old Victorian stories.
Did you see that guy jump 20 feet?
That was a demon.
Isn't it fucking crazy that I just described exactly that fucking thing?
Yeah.
And his one superpower is exactly what I just fucking described.
Yeah.
There he is.
What the fuck, bro?
So you want to know what's an even crazier thing with that story is that Spring Heel
Jack disappeared from England during that time period.
Like he was only there for like a period of like five years.
What if it is an actual spirit or a cryptid that made its way over to America?
And what about what location in America did a lot of people settle from England?
Yeah.
Right around here.
And one of Spring Heel Jack's is still around, just jumping.
If I see Spring Heel Jack on my way home, I'm hitting him with my fucking drilling him.
Dude, that's fucking freaking me out.
Yeah, dude.
That's fucking crazy.
That's a crazy fucking thing.
Dude, this is like what I like about the podcast.
Like this is like I hate arguing politics.
It just makes me fucking angry.
I want to talk about fucking Spring Heel Jack, dude.
God.
Yeah, but like fucking he would like like that story was such a fucking weird story.
And then like you explained it said he was tall and thin with the appearance of a gentleman.
Several reports mentioned that he could breathe out blue and white flames.
Yeah, guys, two people claim that he was able to speak comprehensible English in comprehensive
or comprehensive.
Comprehensible.
But just imagine if Spring Heel Jack still around, he's just fucking walking around New
York, just jumping over roads.
That's fucking wild.
I want to talk about you guys ever have that experience when you're driving at night and
you see like the fucking like shadow goblins that are like running next to your car and
shit?
Yeah, I think that's normal.
Yeah, I know.
But like it's just like a fucking like like I hate seeing that shit like your father.
They're typically like a blur in my eye.
I see them and it's usually like shadow dogs almost they're not like they're like they
crawl like on the ground and like some sort of way and it's always just like kind of like
a like split second thing.
You're like the fuck was that?
Yeah, you can't even get your eyes on them.
You they'll run out of your corner of your vision.
Did I ever tell the story of when me all right listen December twelve you guys free it's
December.
I have no idea what day of the week is that Thursday?
Why should be?
What's the go-go son?
That's the earliest booking for the country.
Oh my god, December.
Yeah.
Emily's birthday is the next week, but I should be free on that Thursday.
That's pretty crazy.
Well, I just got to read this.
There was official recognition of Spring Heel Jack in fucking London.
We have to put all our names in for the country house a few months after these first sightings
on the 9th of January 1838 the Lord Mayor of London Sir John Cowan released in a public
session held in the mansion house an anonymous complaint that he had received several days
earlier which had which he had withheld in the hope of obtaining further information.
The correspondent who signed the letter a resident of Peckham wrote it appears that
some individuals of as the writer believes the highest ranks of life have laid a wager
with a mischievous and foolhardy companion that he durst not take upon himself the task
of visiting many of the villages near London in three different disguises a ghost a bear
and a devil and moreover that he will not enter a gentleman's gardens for the purpose
of alarming the inmates of the house.
The wager has however been accepted.
I can't understand anything that's going on.
How old are you?
Dylan has succeeded in depriving seven ladies of their senses two of whom are not likely
to recover but to become burdens of their families.
How old are you?
I am 25.
Tyler how old are you?
26.
So did I ever tell you guys about the fucking cryptid that me and fucking Saunders are
you Dan?
34.
Dan.
He says reluctantly.
Dan I'm booking you for the country.
So fucking I did I ever say that like the cryptid that means Saunders saw on the fucking
LDT that we did.
I don't know.
So me and Saunders and Saunders can back this up because he was there and he fucking still
talks about this with me.
We were fucking driving back from an LDT in like the middle of fucking Adirondacks.
It was like a take home to the Adirondacks.
It wasn't like a hospital there.
So it was just fucking deep woods Adirondacks.
So me and him are just like whatever and like we're driving back and it's like fucking you
know nighttime in the woods.
So you know just fucking it's got that you know nighttime woods vibe.
And you're just driving through and over our fucking ambulance I shit you not it was a
bat like the size of a fucking person that just fucking white.
It was a white bat that just fucking fucking Casey and then fucking and then Saunders goes
was that a fucking pterodactyl.
Like it just like swooped down and then like swooped up.
And I'm like where the fuck like like its wingspan was like the size of the ambulance
like like windshield.
Like that's how big it was like what was Birdman.
We're like what the fuck was that.
And he's like what the fuck dude.
And like we want like we try to get the fucking the the the drive came from that and they
didn't let us get it.
I'm like dude we saw a fucking monster in the woods dude.
What drive came on that.
And I'm like no I do not give me the fuck.
We're not pulling the drive can so you can see a fucking monster in the woods.
Right.
Real play it back and it's like a plastic bag flying through the air.
But it was easy to autistic kids fucking raging about a plastic bag.
Did you see that thing dude.
It was like a bird like a person.
What the fuck.
And then you got to come to the country house.
Well I'm all right.
Here's what here's the deal is going to be two seventy one each.
Oh my God.
You're not selling this.
I can't.
How about you all watch a documentary on the country.
We can just like fucking free.
I thought you wanted to go to science.
You're three thousand and that's right.
Bro two seventy one.
You fucking kidding me.
Dollars.
Yeah.
Two hundred and seventy one.
That's almost as much as my twenty one pilots ticket cost me.
That's that's too much.
My guy.
That's a lot.
That's like literally like that's like a one way.
OK.
So no I was checking ticket prices to Italy.
Some days you can go from JFK to Italy for one hundred and fifty bucks.
That's that's a round trip to fucking Italy.
One hundred fifty fucking Italy.
Casey.
Close it's close to seventy one.
You wouldn't go to the country house for two hundred seventy dollars.
Yeah but I do some fucking cathedral in Italy.
It'll be cheaper.
Oh fuck you then.
I told you I'm going to be lined in circle things in the communist manifesto.
Eve I told you that much was ease themselves.
Buj was the one word.
It's yes.
It creates a world of its after it's only minutes.
So you go hmm.
Yes I agree with all fucking highly.
I told you it was going to be that much.
Yeah that's why I had more money.
I'm poor right now.
Honestly same.
The department's not going to kill me but they're fucking asking for safety deposits
and two months rent and all this shit.
I have to cash out some test.
Why did Eve have this.
I did.
I had to cash out a Tesla a little bit for it.
Yeah that came out of the Tesla fund.
What is your rent.
I think between me and Cece it's twenty one hundred.
It's not bad but you're paying twenty one hundred dollars for rent.
You know like Kyle written house.
It's a nice apartment though.
I don't pay that much.
That's what we pay together.
I know.
Bro that's insane.
I pay fifteen hundred for this.
How about this.
I pay twelve five.
I got an idea.
I know but she's like nurse I'll be fucking medic.
We got the money for it.
We were living in fucking a Troy ghetto.
I got an idea.
We wanted to treat ourselves.
How about you just go get treat yourselves to a fucking house and pay fifteen hundred
bucks a month.
That's the plan.
Let's go fucking sideways.
Hey like this isn't working out.
We save some money though.
Let's get rid of it and see you.
Like dude.
Well this is our one year plan.
We do want to buy a house.
Do you know how much my rent is a month.
How much is it.
Eight hundred and fifty dollars a month.
I believe you.
That's what I've always paid until now.
But it's like this place.
Oh man.
I just can't describe it.
It's just nice.
It's a happy place.
Like I feel just nice.
I can't just I really can't like I'm so fucking happy with it though compared to where we
were at.
And it's like that's fucking expensive.
It's expensive as fuck man.
But like all the appliances everything in it's brand fucking new.
Like it's just everything's included with a brand new fridge.
We got a pool tennis courts.
Well how often are you going to play tennis.
Actually pretty.
I'm pretty when I lived there before when I was in high school I did.
Tell me if you play tennis.
Speaking of I did it all the fucking time when I lived there in high school.
We I used to highlight it.
I used to fuck out of all the amenities there.
It was just yeah I know but it's fucking nuts the passengers between all of my appliances
are like literally three quarters of what one month of your eyes I know all brand new
well pretty much brand new.
I got this fucking stainless steel fridge off Facebook marketplace for 400 bucks.
I just had to fix like the drawer on it.
My stainless steel dishwasher was 500 bucks.
Like OK.
So I guess what I'm trying to say here is I get it and I want to buy a house like that
is in our plans.
But we were in the middle of school and we're like all right our lease is coming up.
We're not going to stay here.
Where can we rent until we land on our feet.
And it's like all right let's do it here.
Like it's just one year.
It's a nice fucking apartment.
It's not like a long term thing.
I lived there when I was in high school and we left because they kept jacking the rates
when we lived there.
That's so fucking.
I'm sure you're willing to pay to go to the country house.
Not twenty one hundred.
I didn't say twenty one hundred two hundred seventy one dollars.
I pay to say something like I got what it was.
I'm assuming it was don't rent bad.
No no it's just that's like a fucking nut dude.
That is how many bedrooms you got.
Mine is a loft with like it has technically another bedroom that was like a baby's room.
What colors your Bugatti my fucking office though I turn it in an office yeah because
I have I have two bedroom let's go to the fucking country house on December 12th.
It's fucking too much money dude.
Oh dude it's not that much.
Yes it is going to say I don't got that money dude.
Do you guys like badminton.
I played badman.
I played it in like school.
I do I love bad.
I enjoyed playing it.
I have a net.
I'd love to.
Oh yeah we do.
Let's fucking go play some bad man.
We'll do a bad man.
What in the morning you want to set it up at my house.
Yeah the podcast.
Yeah I got a net there.
Yeah fuck yeah I'd be down.
What days are you off Casey.
Well I mean I'm gonna do it on like Thursday.
I have a feeling Dan's sick at bad man and he is just gonna.
I love I love bad do it on a first I'm old by day or as long as you do it like Thursday.
Yeah because I work on or Wednesday.
I'm free Wednesday through Saturday.
Wednesday through Saturday you work on on the weekend all weekend.
Yeah.
I work Saturday.
Sunday.
Friday Saturday Sunday not Friday just Saturday Sunday.
Yeah you were a week off.
Yeah are you.
That's like a.
I told you that.
I think almost as good as a fucking fireman except you get paid more money.
I know I know except that sucks why I'm there.
What the fuck am I doing.
It really fucking so.
I work Sunday Monday Tuesdays.
Saturday Sunday Monday.
Just because I work on Thursday.
So wait so you only work Sunday and Sunday Saturday.
Yeah unless I pick up some shows.
Fucking are you fucking and you complain about your fucking job.
Yeah because it fucking suck.
Are you fucking out of your mind.
What's the worst part.
Yeah I don't know the fucking patients.
I know that I was assuming it wasn't the coffee machine in the break room.
I'd have to I have to give a close second to the doctor.
Right.
Like you fucking shocking my Tom right.
But aren't they aren't they just like and they just like go put a fucking fully in this
bitch.
No.
So you know how like you have your straight cat this bit.
You know how you're an EMS and you're like oh fuck this this one patient like whatever
like I had a terrible ship because one patient or whatever.
Well imagine that except you have six patients all the time.
Oh my god just shaking their fucking ice cups.
Yep yep.
Can I get some more water.
Where's the nurse.
No it's been hours.
How many times how many times have you walked into an elderly person's room when they asked
for a nurse and there's like you're not a nurse.
You're a man.
Oh it's the doctor.
It's that yeah they say are you the doctor.
Yeah yeah yeah yeah.
I say if I if I was then you would be not here right now.
You would be already discharged.
That's reassuring.
So I mean Casey are you going to go for P.A. eventually or a nurse practitioner.
Maybe N.P. Yeah prescribe us all the meds we need.
N.P. come.
Casey what do you mind if I got another hit of that vape.
I think Casey just wants us to leave at this point.
Casey's just like get these fucking assholes out of the house.
We're doing good.
So the fucking contrary house you guys won't pay two hundred seventy dollars.
It's not in the cards right now.
That is I'm trying to play a day trip to take two hundred dollars out of your Robin Hood.
Jesus Christ I'm trying to say I'm not going to save up to buy a taser.
What.
Yeah.
Just get a fucking gun.
No I I'm gonna pull the trigger on a taser.
Because you can take it in your carry on or not you carry on your check baggage really.
Yeah and it's like legal and like Europe.
So depending on the country so get a fucking you can conceal carry a taser.
Yes.
Let me show you the one I want.
So what you're saying about badminton.
Yeah I'm fucking ill at it.
How many people have tasers.
I used to fucking I love that game back in like high school.
Yeah I was fucking ill at that shit too.
Dude I just love it because it's like tennis is too fast for me.
My brain sue so I like tennis bad things tennis guy bad man is just like slow enough to get
fucking you can fucking dunk on fools right.
Yeah dude let's do a bad man tournament you and Tyler against me and Ali Mack.
No I want to be on your team.
Yeah but then we're just gonna I was trying to even it out.
I think y'all sleeping on me and Casey.
Next time we're going to come live to you from Dan's place.
We're going to investigate.
Well Casey's gone for two weeks.
That's pretty cool.
Isn't it sick.
Yeah well Casey's gone for two weeks so we can do it ourselves over your place.
Do what.
Do the pod phase Casey out of the presidential.
You guys can do that.
I want to fucking do the next podcast at Dan's place though.
Yeah for sure.
Yeah we can do that two episodes from now.
Maybe I can get an early start on the day and then and then I can get done early with
work because I stopped at work.
Yeah it's quite the hike.
I say we we investigate Christman sanctuary and then do it at that place where that kid
died right on my property.
Yeah it's like we can play and then we can play bad bent right in front of it.
Hey I found a watch.
Look at that.
Isn't that L dude.
Did you push a fucking watch.
I have a tazer three ninety nine damn.
Yeah you could get a shotgun for that.
Yeah yeah.
But dude I can't bring it in my checked baggage and bring it to you.
No just bring it.
Bring that.
You bring that.
It's just not advice.
Oh shit.
Yeah.
Can you not bring a stiletto fucking with you a gun.
No fucking stiletto knife.
Oh I doubt it.
I highly doubt it.
Dan's like what high heels.
High heels.
Step on me.
What I don't know.
I'll have to look that up.
You can bring a knife in your.
I brought a knife.
I think it's like there's like a three inch limit or something.
You can have like a small blade smaller.
I don't want to fuck with that shit though dude.
It's like the fucking box cutter from that Key and Peele.
I want to see because there's a perfectly legal.
In all these tourist areas all over the world there's like there's pickpockets.
It's like a real problem.
But there is some like violence too.
Like where people just get like their ass kicked and the money taken and their wallets
and shit.
And if anybody's going to fuck with me dude.
You should do some Joe Rogan exercises.
You pull a taser on him dude.
If somebody tries to pickpocket me is it going to get a like does it like shoot or is it
like or is it like I want to get the press.
Now that's a stun gun.
It's shoots.
Oh it shoots.
Yeah and it even makes a pop like it sounds like halfway to a gun when it pops.
So like that's like the one the cops have right.
Yeah.
So this is legal to buy.
Yeah.
They're legal in New York state now because they ruled that it was depriving people of
having it was against the Second Amendment.
You can't do that.
Yep.
Yeah.
That's what they ruled.
So you don't want it legal for a long time.
So you don't need like a pistol permit for him or nothing.
Nothing.
Wow.
You can get that one for 350 bucks right now with a holster and that you just got the black
handle showing it looks just like a fucking pistol.
Yeah but then the fucking federal.
I can't open carry that can you.
What's that.
You can't open carry that.
Technically it's not a gun so you probably could but it probably is bad idea.
I don't know.
That's a good question.
There's too much like a pistol to do that.
Yeah.
The fucking federal if they saw your fucking pistol grip hanging out they'd be like what's
going on over here.
Big guy.
No I think you can conceal it though.
Like I think it's enough of a deterrent to where like you might not even need to pull
the trigger on it.
Right.
Somebody came up to think it's a gun.
Somebody came up to you with a knife and you're just like you want to fuck around and find
out bro.
Just like lift up your waist shirt off your waistband.
Like did you really want to.
And if they were still being fucking assholes let them ride the lightning.
Let them ride the lightning.
Shit the battery's dead.
Fuck wait.
Right.
I mean Taser's a good brand.
I don't think that would happen.
Yeah.
But I want it not just for this trip I want it just to fucking have all the time.
Yeah.
In my car.
In America I just get a fucking gun dude.
Get a pistol.
No dude I don't want to.
I want to avoid that situation.
I'm thinking right now I have nothing and something is better than nothing.
Wait you don't even have a shotgun or anything?
No I mean I have a 10-22 but it's a hundred dollar Mossberg Blinkster.
And it's at my buddy's house.
It's been there for three years.
Like I haven't even seen it.
It's in his gun safe.
So I mean something is better than nothing.
And like if it comes down to it dude and somebody wants to fuck with you that could save your
life.
You know one at first glance they're going to think it's a gun before they see the yellow
on the front because that one does have yellow on the front.
But then you just fucking do 50,000 fucking volts that'll change somebody's mind.
Yeah.
You know.
You'll see after that.
Right.
Or it'll be like that fucking one guy on cops who's just like I'll get you bitch.
Right.
And just keeps going.
I mean the cool thing about this one is like once you shoot your WAD it's still.
You blow your WAD.
Yeah it's still a stun gun so you can touch him with it and hit him with 50,000 volts.
So that's good.
And we could test it out on a podcast.
Cartridges are only 23 bucks.
I'd do it.
So would you?
Yeah I've been tased before.
I'll do it again.
You've been tased before?
Yeah.
Really?
You've been tased before by the cops remember?
Oh shit.
I told that story before.
Alright well tase Tyler.
I'm not.
No I won't.
I kind of want to see what it feels like.
I'll get you bitch.
Oh shit.
Do you ever see that video?
That's not a good noise to hear if you just fired that off.
You're like oh fuck.
What would you do?
Dan in this in this situation here.
Hold on.
Look at this.
What would you do if this was the situation you were put in?
I'll get you bitch.
Oh that dude didn't give a fuck.
What do you do in that situation?
I bet one of the prongs missed.
That had to be.
Yeah because they usually like lock your fucking muscles up.
You don't even have control over them.
I'll get you bitch.
Yeah right.
So that one of the prongs didn't get him.
You're hitting the ground if they get you with that.
Yeah for sure.
Tyler said he'll let Dan Tazem.
On the next episode.
So Tyler can we have an apology for the first portion of the podcast?
I thought we were just adding that out.
No no no.
We got to give an apology to all female viewers.
I think it's definitely more than warranted.
I will only apologize to women if they don't vote for Kamala Harris.
Well there you have it.
Well you already voted but they should be able to vote.
I'm sure you really swayed them with that performance.
Well the whole reason I don't want them to vote is because they're going to vote for
Kamala Harris just because she's a woman.
Alright you're already your first folks.
I don't know if Trump supporters would vote for her just because she's a woman.
I don't know how many people are gonna vote for her just because she's a woman.
I mean even on Fox News they said she was tied the polls with Trump.
She wasn't tied in the polls.
Alright I think we're about to wrap this one up.
Thanks for listening and like us on Facebook.
Lights your balls on fire.
Wait do the outro.
Send us your tips.
Don't send us your tips.
Send us your tips.
As always if you're a puppy routine.
Be kind to yourselves.
And each other.
We out.
Fuck off.
Sleep paralysis is real.
For all we know robots have souls.
We just don't know if they do or don't.
How do you know?
Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot?
You think we were the first ones to inhabit this planet?
Fuck no.
Yeah well I don't see some real dubby stock right?
No no we are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole.
Yes we are.
There's people out there with some really dumb thoughts.
Extended episodes.
Where the fuck did this year end come from?
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?
They're killing all the already born babies and selling them to the Chinese.
Aliens exist.
Somewhere in China.
In some days.
What the fuck?
There are super soldiers that are on the run.
Neanderthal from th gentlemen.
slope
on
yeah
well-hunger
You feel them die of this virus. You feel bump bump bump BEEP!
Nothing. They're fucking gone. I've seen it happen.
I think that the government has taken it to the next level with the birds.
They know what birds are going to cross paths with you that you are going to be able to raise.
And they are going to make them so fucking real. They're going to sink money into them.
Because they know that if you put that motherfucker in a cage, they're going to be able to convince you that thing is fucking real.
You can cut it open, you're going to see blood cuts, no circuitry, but let me tell you, their technology is absolutely vile.
Which, by the way, big brother, is the overlord kibbit.
We're only living in the third dimension!
HOOOOOOOO!
George Soros is an actual Nazi collaborator, okay?
I'm not fucking lying, it's fucking real.
Okay, look it up, look it up.
He says that he was doing this shit.
George Soros actually worked with the fucking Nazis during the Holocaust.
He says that he was doing it just to survive, but he fucking loved it.
He was having a great fucking time doing this shit.
George Soros is the fucking devil, okay?
He's not fucking doing this shit for us.
George Soros is fucking evil.
He's the actual fucking leader for all this shit.
He's fucking fucked down a whole bunch of shit.
Just don't fucking get it, okay?
Everybody's like, stop.
Donald Trump is the fucking word person out there.
He's not the actual fucking leader.
It's George Soros, it's Bill Gates, it's fucking Elon Musk.
It's everyone out there.
Everybody's like, stop.
Elon Musk is so cool.
Everybody's like, stop.
You're saying, Elon Musk is so cool.
He made like a place for us.
The actual government is trying.
The actual new government, which is George Soros and all the fucking Nazis,
are actually the ones that are in charge of fucking the Holocaust.
The queer politicians are paid off by the fucking billionaires.
Fucking fly.