The following program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.
Fewer discretion is advised.
This program is intended for mature audiences and may cause cancer in at-risk populations.
Welcome to Untitled Podcast, the second episode of episode 50.
Thank you for listening until episode 50.
What'd you say, Tyler?
fifty cents fucking shredded
I wouldn't say that's that shredded. Let me see.
He used to be.
He's like photoshopped in the picture for the album.
Like dude he looked like shit at the fucking halftime show like two years ago.
Yeah he's juicy in this picture too.
Everybody was calling him-
He's on steroids.
Everybody was calling him fucking dollar 50 now.
He got big! He was fucking-
He was fucking fat.
Yeah, buck 50, yeah.
Yeah, cause he was a fucking big boy.
And he was hanging from the ceiling.
It just, it was not a flattering look for him at all.
Yeah, I saw that.
Even at the end of the movie,
what's the 50 cent movie called?
Get Rich or Die Trying.
He takes his shirt off and it's like not that impressive.
It's like he's rapping, it's like the final thing.
And it's like, he's pretty soft looking.
And he's got some pretty big mantets going on here.
So he's definitely got some gynochromastia.
That's a hardcore sign of steroid abuse.
So.
Damn Dan, you know all about that shit.
Yeah, you can tell by these muscles too, the traps.
Yeah.
Yeah, traps, delts and pecs, that's dead giveaway.
Anyway.
So first off for today,
Steroids with Dan.
Before the podcast, me and Tyler went a little ghost hunting
and we didn't find much.
Let's hear your account of events here, Casey.
It was like a little nature trail.
We walked down the little brick roads as it was getting dark
and we found like a river with waterfalls.
There's like a little witch house fucking next
to one of the streams and Tyler.
Is there a witch in the house?
No, there was a rake actually in the house.
Yeah.
What were you saying your friend said was there?
Like a Sasquatch or some shit?
A rake.
No, so Tyler's calling it a rake.
He described it as a short humanoid figure
that looked like Gollum.
Oh.
It was mainly the main thing that he pointed out.
First and foremost above anything is how pale this thing was.
Was that by the waterfalls?
It was by, there's like a little pond there.
He said it was like looking at them.
That's where we were.
Right?
And it was just like a sort of animalistic kind of thing.
Well, he said that this, he described it
as what's called a fallen angel.
He said, everything I looked up online is-
One of these boys?
Is exactly, that's kinda how he described it.
He said it was bald like Gollum, pale.
And he said it was just hunched over, right, by the water,
like kneeling down.
And he stepped on a twig and it just looked over at him
like it already knew he was there.
Not like surprised.
Yeah.
Like, oh, what's that?
Just turned its head, acknowledging what it already knew.
Yeah.
And letting him know, I see you.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
Yeah, we were there by the pond.
I mean, you're not always gonna see something, but.
Yeah, I wish he would tell the story
because it was just 10 times better
because he's so dramatic about it.
And just the way he called his girlfriend-
You do a good job with it.
You think he would- That hurts me.
Would he ever go back there?
I mean, he lives right by there.
It's basically touching his problem.
Would he be too, like, he wouldn't wanna go back there
because he saw that thing?
Oh no, this kid, dude, he's not afraid of anything.
No, he's not a-
He's a big strong man who doesn't afraid of anything?
He's not afraid of anything, he's not afraid of laws,
he's not afraid of other people, he's not afraid of the dark.
He's just not afraid, he just does shit.
It's fucking crazy.
I've never, I've literally-
He's full on Eminem-init.
I wish I could be like that.
I think it was, Nietzsche described the next version
of man is gonna be called the-
Ubermensch. Ubermensch, right?
I already know about the Ubermensch,
I know a lot about the Ubermensch.
And this kid is literally like, to me, that's the Ubermensch.
He's the over man.
So that's literally like what Superman means,
it comes from that.
It's the next iteration of mankind,
it's gonna be people that don't care,
basically what other people think,
and they live by their own rules.
That's what I try to do.
That's this kid, dude, he doesn't give a fuck.
Isn't that just anarchy?
No, he doesn't live under the constraints
of what society expects.
He just does what he wants at the time.
No laws govern this guy.
It's a good theory to live by.
Yeah, yeah.
I like to try to live like that.
Yeah, it's good for some things, it's not good for others.
So episode fucking 50, boys.
The big five off.
Oh!
Shit.
Oh!
Damn.
Oh!
So I beat the new Syrofoam DLC.
That was fun.
How did we like it?
I've heard it was really good.
It was good, but then the ending that it unlocks
is literally the worst ending.
So just a complete cliffhanger?
No.
Oh.
It's like two full.
Oh, don't tell me then.
Oh, it sucks.
Don't tell me then, because I plan on it,
I just haven't gotten around to it yet.
You're gonna hate it.
Damn.
Dude, I'm not ready for this.
It's fantastic.
The whole DLC is great.
I don't think I can handle that.
Whole DLC is fantastic, but you're gonna hate
the new ending it unlocks for the end of the game.
Yeah.
If you do certain things, you get a new ending for the game,
and the new ending just made me fucking real sad.
Oh no.
Like there is like, it doesn't really leave much up
for interpretation.
So I'm assuming you die.
No, you don't.
Okay, then don't tell me a single thing then.
Yeah.
Don't tell me a single thing,
because that sounds like some shit that I'd like.
I was like, afterwards I was like, that's it man.
That's it.
It's over.
There's nothing left.
I hate that feeling.
What, you mean like, it's like, you get that feeling
almost like when you've watched like a seven season show
and it's over?
Is that what you mean?
Like it's just, there's no loose ties or anything?
No, it's like it's over.
Like that's the end.
Like it's not necessarily a bad,
I'd say it's a bittersweet ending.
Gotcha.
So you're more just sad that you're not going
to get anything new from it again.
Yeah.
Like I like, that makes sense.
I like the star ending, where you ride off
with Pan Am, that's the best one.
Pan Am's ending is just the best.
It was the best.
I fucking hope our listeners have played cyberpunk
because they're lost right now.
Just about as lost as you two right now.
I'm lost.
No, I've seen it.
I don't really.
It's a good game.
You're not a big fucking video game guy, are you?
No, dude, the problem is is that I-
He's a big Microsoft flight simulator guy.
No, the problem is is that I am a big video game guy
and I try and stay away from it
because it's like one of my vices.
Oh, you're like Joe Rogan.
Exactly.
Yeah, I literally, dude, if I had Grand Theft Auto
on my computer right now,
I would play it for 14 hours a day.
And I literally don't have it for that reason.
You said that so much.
Your delivery of that was perfect.
Oh, dude, why do you think I worked at Altamont so long?
Are you gonna play GTA 6?
Oh, wait, you gotta blip that off.
Dude, it doesn't, we, they all know exactly who we work for.
Well, I mean, it's what I was about to say.
I literally got paid to play Grand Theft Auto
for 14 hours a day.
Oh!
Beat off.
Oh, what are they gonna do, fire you?
You might have to blip that.
What, you don't even work there anymore.
I know.
You know what I mean?
Oh, sorry.
Dude, I feel like-
I could sit there for-
Ah!
I could just sit there for a while.
It's not that bad, though.
Oh.
No, I want a fresh one, give me a fresh one.
I want that fucking thing.
Yeah, so are you gonna play the new GTA
when it comes out?
Six.
Bro, I'm gonna have to, and that's the problem.
I can crack it, I can crack it.
Because I already did everything I wanted to do in GTA 5.
And that you can play-
None of which is following the missions.
You can play as a hot chick in this game.
Yeah, there's a chick in this one.
I get it now.
One of the main characters is a chick.
She's got-
Damn.
Dumpy, too.
I was gonna say, she has a fat ass.
She's got a dump.
Oh!
Oh, dude, I'm telling you, if you crack this
and you get it when it's real fresh,
that's as bad as the fucking red ones when they're fresh.
Ah, man.
No, I don't think so.
I don't know.
No.
Give me the red one.
This one's brutal.
Give me the red one.
The red one's going so wrong.
I have played a lot of Baldur's Gate.
Baldur's Gate's probably one of my new favorite games.
I'm gonna give this one a big one here.
What is that?
It's like Dungeon and Dragons in the game.
Oh.
It was rough.
Yeah, it was rough.
Oh, shit.
So fucked.
About to start a fire over here.
Episode 50, the bonfire episode.
Episode 50, we got some good segments for you.
Clear your sinuses.
You know what was in the news this week?
Is Kevin McCarthy, the House Speaker,
Got knocked out.
Was removed, voted to be removed from office.
The first time it's ever happened.
First time in American history.
That's fucking crazy.
Thank God.
You know why?
Because the Democrats, right, they're the minority.
They voted against him with eight
conservative extremist representatives
led by Matt Gaetz.
Extreme in which direction?
On the right.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, that guy kind of annoyed me.
The fucking, the MAGA guys.
So it was like, it was like Gaetz.
And Trump supports them, by the way.
Right.
Trump wanted McCarthy out because he didn't,
he's not like a MAGA Republican.
Right, right.
He's like a moderate Republican.
Sure.
So him and eight other Republicans voted
with the Democrats to remove him from office
and like hopefully elect someone that's more conservative.
Well, they kind of, he kind of fucked himself
because all, because like when he was elected,
he signed like a thing that said,
if literally one member of Congress,
or what is it?
The House?
The House, yeah.
If one member of the House said that
they wanted to kick him out,
they could have a vote to kick him out.
Right, right.
I saw that.
Like he signed that himself.
Yeah.
Nice move, dickhead.
Real fucking stupid.
Jesus Christ.
Like, you can't do something like that
and not expect to be fucking.
Yeah, there's gonna be a couple people
that are even on your side.
But my thing is, why are the Democrats
partnering with the extreme right wing
to remove the House Speaker?
Because they wanna fucking destabilize everything.
But they're not gonna elect a Democratic Speaker.
Casey, you could look at that either way though.
It could be one supporting the other.
They're just gonna elect another Republican.
That's probably not gonna be as moderate.
Okay, because look at this.
Say you have like a football team
and a fight starts on the other team, right?
Like that looks better for you.
Because you're like, oh look at it,
a bunch of pussies are fighting with each other.
Yeah, I guess.
You know?
So it looks, it makes the Republicans look bad
because they can't even.
Oh, they can't even control their own party.
I feel like the real headline though
would be that the Democrats were part of that vote though
to get him out though.
No, the Democrats were the people who did that.
It was all the Democrats and eight Republicans.
The conservatives did that
because they couldn't have won without them.
Without conservatives.
Yeah, it was every single one of them.
I know, but I'm just saying it's not gonna be,
it's not gonna paint the headline that you were saying though
because it's all of them against just a couple.
I mean, I guess.
Well, because it kind of says, it's like,
look, we don't agree with this guy, right?
Which you know, Democrats don't agree
with the Republicans, right?
And they don't even agree with this guy, so we're right.
I think that's how it looks.
There's like a division in the party
amongst like the MAGA Republicans
and the fucking regular Republicans now.
Right.
So do you see this guy, Matt Gaetz?
You ever see him talk?
Oh yeah, he's kind of annoying.
Yeah, he's a fucking asshole.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh my God, I can't stand him.
He seems like a little dee, dweeby rich guy.
He's like a.
I can't say I've ever fucking.
Yeah, you'll know him if you see his picture.
Yeah, yeah.
Did you hear who they all nominated?
Who?
To be the speaker.
Who?
Donald Trump.
Trump?
Yeah, they all asked, they all,
basically all of them said they want Trump.
And they asked Trump at his court hearing in New York
if he would consider it.
And he says, I'm gonna do what's good for the country.
So I'll let you know.
The speaker doesn't have to be a representative?
No, the speaker could be, you could be the speaker.
It's just somebody who represents the party.
Clearly somebody's been lying to you.
All right, that's right.
Because the president come out and say
there was a deal with the speaker.
Holy shit.
That's wild.
Yeah, anybody can.
So he could do that.
Would he take that position immediately?
So I don't know, but.
Because I was gonna say, is this something
he could get pre-
And then he would be third in line to be president.
Is this something he could do?
No.
Yeah, right.
And then they would kill Joe Biden.
He'd have to be voted in.
And then he would become president.
No, he wouldn't have to be running.
What are you really?
He's going presidency, he's not gonna run for that shit.
Well, he said he would do what's right for the country.
I think it's a trap, all right?
And also I think it's a bad idea
when you're running for president
because you want people to vote for you
to see what you would be like in the White House again.
So if you already give them a taste of it,
nobody's gonna vote for you because they're like,
ah, I've already seen this asshole all over TV again.
I'm good.
So I think it's kind of a trap.
I think it's funny.
Yeah, but they did nominate him to be the speaker
and he would be sitting behind Joe Biden
while Joe Biden's giving his speeches.
Hey, just be going.
Yup, just shaking his head.
Fucking funny, just be like.
It would be hilarious.
It was like when Nancy Pelosi was behind Trump
and she's like.
Right.
That's the same thing though.
The fucking Dems are just gonna see that as a huge win
that would be like, haha, fucking Joe's giving a speech
while fucking Trump's behind him.
Right, right.
I don't think you would ever do that.
That's not gonna be like a power move for him.
No, I mean, but remember when Nancy Pelosi
ripped up his speech and the thing,
she's like, if she could barely rip it,
she was having real trouble.
Yeah.
Nancy Pelosi's a fucking demon.
Well, I mean, dude.
I saw that picture of Nancy Pelosi and Kennedy.
A pathetic display.
Yeah.
She's looking like a snack back in the day.
Well, she looked like she was like 25, 30.
Looking like a goddamn snack.
Oh, back in the day, she was hot as fuck.
She was a babe, yeah.
You know that John F. Kennedy fucking pounded her out.
And then she got fucking Potomac fever
and she couldn't keep up.
She couldn't stay out of the fucking White House
and every political building in a 50 mile radius.
You think she was blowing Trump?
No, no.
JFK though.
Biden.
JFK.
That's a crazy thing.
Maybe Biden, she might've been,
dude, you know that shit, that quid pro quo shit.
Actually, no, I saw a video actually this week
of her and Trump having an argument
in front of the press in the White House one time.
They're sitting down, right?
Yeah.
There's no way, there's no way a whole lot of quid,
when no pro goes on there, because it's just like,
what are you gonna do?
You know, dude, did you see this picture
of JFK looking at Nancy Pelosi like this week?
Yeah, yeah, I saw it.
We called her that quid pro quo.
What are you gonna do if,
even if she wanted to report that, what are you gonna do?
You're gonna go to the fucking local police station
and tell him to fucking- The president touched me.
Yeah, it's like, yeah, sure, sure he did.
Count your fucking blessings, sweetheart.
Yeah, look at that.
It's a Kennedy shit.
Yeah, look at fucking JFK.
I fucking-
I'm going to fuck that later.
Yeah, and he was known for that.
She has very nice breasts.
I've said it.
We're going to fondle those breasts.
Tyler, send it to me, I'll make up the picture.
But here's- Her bosom is very shapely.
Here's my thing, I was watching a video-
She does have those nice 1970s cones going on.
Yeah, dude.
She's pulling off the bangs.
Well, I'd cross party's pulling off the bangs.
Would you become a Democrat for that?
And you think of what Nancy Pelosi is now.
For that now or then?
Then.
Yes.
And you think about what Nancy Pelosi is now.
It's a crazy world we live in, gentlemen.
Would you suck on her tits?
Now or then?
At that point, back then.
Then, yes.
Now, nevermind.
If I was not a taken man,
I would perhaps suckle on those tits.
Yes.
But, but, but, but, but, but-
It's not such a political answer.
But I am and therefore I would not.
I think there-
That's what the card said, right?
You fucking dimple that,
you're palling that over.
I think therefore I am.
Dude, she looks like-
Just on the off chance my girlfriend listens
to this like six years from now,
is like trying to get dirt on me or something.
She's like fuck, I can't give him credit on that one.
She looks like Audrey Hepburn.
Yeah, she does, yeah.
She looks like Audrey Hepburn.
She does.
Yeah.
She does.
There's no fucking way that's Nancy Pelosi.
I would have a poster of her on my wall.
Old Nancy.
Young Nancy.
You mean?
Yes, yes, yes.
The old, young-
Fucking Nancy Wheeler.
She's looking, damn dude.
Even when she was like in her 40s, like here.
Yeah, she was still pretty bad.
Damn, she was looking fine.
It's like a fucking, oh bro,
I can't say who it is from where I work,
but same energy right there.
Oh, man.
You know exactly who I'm talking about.
I know exactly who you're talking about.
And dude, I had a panic attack the other day.
Oh shit.
Let me show you when I was like-
Because of Nancy Pelosi?
No, hold on a sec.
Let me see if I can pull it up quick.
Why did you have a panic attack?
Well, hold on, I'll show it to Ali.
I'll show it to Ali Maddus.
I was gonna say, if it has to do with this woman,
it does not take a lot.
She's a polarizing character, I'll say that.
I'll see if I show you
and you understand what I'm talking about.
Hold on, I gotta pull up my 23andMe app.
No!
No fucking way, bro!
You're joking.
Hold on a sec.
You're related to her?
No.
Hold on.
No fucking way.
Bro, there's no fucking way.
I'm gonna lose my shit.
Dude, if Boatboy is listening to this-
Who is he talking about?
A coworker?
I'm not gonna say the name now.
Is it a coworker?
If Boatboy, let me put it this way,
if Boatboy were here right now,
he would be shitting his pants laughing.
Shut up, Boatboy.
I gotta pull up that email.
Boatboy.
We gotta send him a response.
Maybe this is it.
No way.
No, no, no, it's not.
But at first glance, I was like-
Oh, I thought you were gonna say
it was fucking her on there.
Oh my God.
I was gonna be like,
I thought you were gonna tell me
you matched with her or some shit,
and I was gonna fucking lose my mind.
Just at first glance, I saw that family member,
and I was like,
I was like, wait, what?
Let me see that.
Holy shit.
You know what I mean?
At first, looking at it.
Bro, I thought-
Because it's close.
It's close.
I'll be honest, I thought 23andMe was dating site.
No.
Are you tired?
No, I was just gonna be like, damn.
Oh, no, no.
I mean, she probably is.
I just saw that.
Yeah.
And I was like,
spit my fucking drink out.
The bee even.
If I saw it, I'd be like, oh my God.
The PTSD.
Fuck.
What are you gonna say?
Oh yeah.
How is she these days?
She is such a bitch.
Edit that out, right there.
Oh, shit.
Edit that out.
Boatboy, please tell me you're listening.
I'm getting edited out.
How many minutes in, Ali?
No, I'm uncomfortable with everything I've said so far.
23.
23 and 23.
Ali, I don't think there's enough to-
There's not enough to be fucking just,
like you couldn't,
there's like 10 people on this planet
who know who I'm talking about.
Ali Mack is under the influence.
I'm protecting him.
We're gonna edit it out, right here.
We're gonna put a bleep.
What am I bleeping?
Yeah, I didn't say a name.
I didn't say a word. You said the B word.
All right, dead?
Yeah.
Well, that's not nice, Ali Mack.
Oh, I said bitch.
Yeah.
I can't say bitch.
I think you can't say bitch on this podcast.
It's 20, 23.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Fuck the listeners.
It's episode 50.
You should know this by now.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hold on.
Nobody knows who I'm talking about.
Ali Mack, pull his mic.
Oh, shit.
You canceled.
Oh my Mike, are you fucking-
You canceled, dude.
Explain to me what I did.
They're gonna vote me back in like Trump here.
You're canceled.
I'm canceled?
Yeah, you're canceled.
You wanna know what?
I'm gonna fucking-
There you go.
I'm gonna fucking-
You wanna see under the influence.
I'll drive home under the influence, bro.
You got duck tape in here?
Give me my fucking mic back.
Oh my Lord.
So, I was watching-
Is this back?
Oh, we're back.
You brought him back.
Wait, so-
I just wanted you to see what it feels like
to get canceled and have absolutely no control
and see what it feels like-
I figured you were going down that
because I was like, Dan, I didn't do anything.
I didn't fucking do anything, Dan.
I've said worse shit and I will say worse shit.
Cancel culture, bro.
I fucking hate it so much.
Oh my God.
Can you just get your mic pulled just like that?
Yeah.
Bullshit.
I was watching Trump this week talk
and he's like a fucking standup comedian.
It's crazy.
Dude, he's amazing.
Yeah, I was watching him.
He was demolishing Joe Biden at his fucking rallies.
And he, like, his one,
the things he said are like one-liners.
Sleepy Joe.
That's what he always says.
Sleepy Joe.
And it gets-
It's hard to like, I mean, I still don't like him, but yeah.
He's charismatic.
It's just like, dude, do you fucking see this idiot?
I don't like him, but he's fucking funny sometimes.
He's hilarious, dude.
He always has been.
Even when I fucking hated him
and I was like super left wing,
at the same time, he'd just say shit sometimes
and it was like, you fucking wanted to root against him
because you disagree with him.
But at the same time, I'm like,
God, I really can't come up with a good defense
to what he's fucking saying.
Like, if he was a little, like, slightly more stable
and balanced, he would be an excellent president.
You'd be like, dude, this guy is America.
But he's just, it's just because, like,
some of the stuff he does is so reckless
that it's like, you gotta be careful
even saying you like the guy.
But he knows that and it's like a political strategy
because he needs to be a polarizing figure.
A lot of his followers fucking feed off that shit.
If he didn't have it, you would just be another politician.
And then you're gonna get a fucking big divide.
And I think that, like, it's just,
he knows that right now he's garnering pretty much
all the support of people in this party.
I mean, sure, you got Republicans that don't like the guy.
But just about everyone I've met is like,
yeah, not matter who he got, like, he's the dude.
I don't know.
Dude, I think a lot more people than you think
are ready to vote for the guy.
Just because they've been so frustrated
over the past four years.
Yeah, like, dude, even people. Out of spite.
Even uninformed voters.
Like, what do they see from Biden?
They seem fucking slipping and falling on a stage
not knowing how to speak.
I can't wait to watch that debate.
Price of groceries tripling over the last four years.
A fucking debate between 82-year-old Joe Biden
and Trump who's like going on 80.
Yeah. Yeah, no, I fucking,
I can't stand the fact that all the politicians are old too.
But at the same time, though, it's like,
these are the two best options I got here.
My vote's only gonna matter
if you fucking buy into that stuff.
Not saying rigged elections or anything.
That was not the implication.
But like, it's just saying like,
I don't fucking know I'm high.
I have no idea where I was going with that.
That was an abrupt stop.
So do you wanna?
Breaks on the train just came up.
Yeah, right before the major point.
I'm emailing train man back in Moore's code.
What the, Dan, what the fuck was I talking about there?
Dude, I literally zoned out for like a good minute and a half.
I just started thinking about all the things
I'm anxious about in the background
and I just like zoomed out.
Bro, you got fucking,
we got stimulant Dan up in the house here.
Yeah, and I'm pounding coffee.
Yep.
It is not helping.
Dan's on extra stimulants today.
Yeah, I might even take more.
Dan's fucking rocking right now.
Wait, wait, when you walked out of your car.
Did you do another?
I might, no, I'm just joking.
I don't, I don't do that.
I, no, I just wanted to get my phone.
Oh, I was gonna say, bro.
The problem is, is like if it was a short, like four hours.
What's going on here?
I was gonna be like, it's gonna be like,
whoa, you're gonna tell me video games are bad
and then you run out and do that shit.
No, if it was short acting, I would do it.
Maybe like a little bit, but these are 12 hours.
So I'd be up until fucking tomorrow.
No, you can't.
Dude, insomnia is a real fucking problem.
Yeah, yeah.
And Tyler doesn't seem to have that problem.
We gotta get Tyler back in here
and we gotta get the Pharma conversation going here.
All right, help me write this email to Train Man.
I said, hello, Train Man.
Thanks for sending us our first email.
Well, don't tell him what you're gonna say.
Oh, yeah.
It's gotta be a surprise.
Right, right.
Casey, we'll leave this one in your hands here.
Let's send him a riddle.
Yeah?
A real shout out.
Yes.
A real, he'll get it before he listens to this.
Tyler, get up, it's episode 50 and you're not in your seat.
God.
Speaking of, I'm gonna save this picture
of Nancy Pelosi for later.
Save it in Spank Bank.
That's a hot broad.
Yeah.
We canceled now.
I'm gonna pull my mic over broad.
Listen, the 1950s had some real good looking ladies.
Yeah.
I don't know if you could hear Tyler,
but that was absolutely,
he made a very correct statement right there.
He said, listen, the 1950s had some real good looking ladies.
I said, both of you to assume I did.
I said, both of you to assume I did not know Morse code.
Both of you to assume I did not know how to look up
how to translate Morse code.
Literally Morse code translators online.
Cause he was telling me when he was writing it,
he's like, I'm gonna try to get Casey to decrypt it.
And I was like, dude, I'm gonna be honest with you.
As soon as he sees it and he figures out what it is,
he's gonna pop it into a translator.
I'm like, he's not gonna sit there waiting.
He's gonna want that email quick.
So we've got a riddle for train man.
All right.
So I'm gonna say, we'd like you to solve.
Is this like who wants to be a millionaire
where if I get it right away, I can shout it out?
Well, we're gonna ask the riddle on this episode
and then we'll answer it on the next one.
We'll give the answer.
All right.
So the listeners have something to chew on for a week.
Okay.
I like it.
So we're innovating here.
An electric train is moving north at a hundred miles per hour
and a wind is blowing to the west at 10 miles per hour.
Which way does the smoke blow?
The train's moving north at a hundred miles per hour north
and what is the other thing?
And a wind is blowing to the west at 10 miles per hour.
Which way does the smoke blow?
Oh, that's fucking easy.
Yeah, I got that one.
Is it?
Yeah.
Which way does the smoke blow?
Dude, he's gonna know that shit like nothing.
You kidding me?
This dude fucking sits at home
watching YouTube videos on trains.
You telling me he can't figure out whether the wind
or the propulsion of the train moves the wind?
Fucking thing.
That's so fucking easy.
Well, Tyler, if you think you know the answer.
Wait, say that one more time.
That's why it's so fucking easy, Ali Mac.
Yeah, no, I think I just.
I'm not gonna say it again.
I think it just clicked.
Oh, yep.
Isn't it?
Can you tell me?
I swear to God I won't say it if I got it,
but can you ask it?
Wait, hold on.
Because they're gonna replay this.
It's not like they're gonna.
Let's see which way the wind is blowing.
Wind is blowing to the west,
so that would mean that it's coming from the east,
so it's blowing it to the west.
Are we boxing shoes?
Train's going north.
Yep.
Right, from your perspective, train's going north.
Yep.
Wind's blowing east to west, 10 miles an hour.
Which way does the smoke blow?
South?
Train's moving north.
Yeah.
Right, so this is from your perspective.
Yeah, so this.
Train's moving north.
I got it.
Train's moving north.
Smoke is blowing east to west.
Right.
So it's gonna blow west.
All right, go back and listen to the question.
All I'll say is I will,
I'll leave my answer to the listeners.
Tyler wants to say the answer.
I want to too.
Tyler, we both know it.
All I'm gonna say is I know the answer,
and I know it for certain.
Do you?
Yes.
I'm kind of curious, I think you should pause it,
and I kind of want to hear.
Yeah, pause it.
Just so the listeners don't find out,
and then we'll say the answer next week.
We'll check the email.
That's untitled podcast.
All right, we're pausing.
We're back.
That's why I said I had it for certain.
I knew it.
Yeah, it's.
We've got two geniuses here.
That's all I'm gonna say.
Yes.
Dude, you're correct on the answer.
It's a riddle.
The listeners don't know, though.
You're right, no.
I'm gonna shut up.
I want to like, serve five.
I want him to get it wrong, some shit.
I'm gonna say, if you saw,
I said we have a riddle about trans,
and you are the only train man we know.
If you solve this riddle, what are we gonna send him?
The fucking another invite to the podcast.
If he solves the riddle,
man, I think he's gonna get it right,
so I don't want to make this prize too big.
He gets an invite to the group chat.
Ooh.
What about this doorknob?
That's a prize.
That is a prize.
That is nice.
No, he doesn't want a fucking doorknob.
Hey, boat boy.
Let's see.
One side of a doorknob might I add.
We'll send him something nice.
It's not even a set.
No, I want him to do a group chat, if he gets it.
We'll send him an autographed picture of a train.
It's not even a set of doorknobs.
That is a useless prize.
That is a fidget toy.
That's all that thing is.
Well, if I didn't think he was gonna get it right,
it'd be a bigger prize.
He's gonna give me $20 for fucking,
winning Who Wants to Be a Millionaire sometimes.
He gets one fucking doorknob.
Well, he's got a house.
He could probably use that.
He's got a house.
He might need a doorknob.
That's true.
That was impressive though, that you guys both got that.
That was not hard.
Yeah, but I would be like.
Well, if you're expecting a knee-jerk answer,
that would not have been it.
Right.
And I can't discuss why my thought process changed,
but it's like, it's a riddle.
You gotta, I'm not even gonna do that,
because if I say that, it will fucking give it away.
I'm kinda, there's a couple more.
I think it's time for a smoke.
This one's stupid.
How long have we been going for?
It feels like it hasn't been that long.
It's been about 15 minutes.
I was gonna say.
No, it's been about half an hour.
Oh wow.
Yeah, and me and Dan are on stimulants.
And that's why we thought that.
All right, the email was sent to Train Man.
I've got a friend at work.
She knows a lot about trains.
She's actually a train conductor.
And I told her we should have her on the podcast.
Dispatcher.
And I think we should have a trivia
between Train Man and her.
Oh, that'd be fun.
Yeah, and see who would get the most answers right.
I don't know.
She'd give him a run for his money, I think.
Oh yeah?
Yeah, I think it'd be close, but I think she would.
I don't know, Mike, I don't know.
She's good.
She's a competition.
Ash, I hope you aren't better than me.
Oh, for trains?
Yeah.
Oh, I don't know shit about trains.
No, dude, you'd see some serious shit, bro,
between these two, I bet.
The only thing I know about is fucking Thomas the train,
my guy.
Dude, that was my jam back in the day.
He used to love that.
Wait, I have an idea to propose.
So I know we had the expedition to the trail today,
but what if for bonus content,
just I'm just getting a poll here.
So you said that movie Old 37,
which apparently is a rather not great horror movie
Yeah.
based off of the research I've done.
We could do a live commentary of it with all of us.
We could fucking watch that shit and just critique it
and just see where the conversation goes during the movie.
Yeah.
I don't know, that's an idea.
That is, I like that.
Some B-roll stuff.
I think we should start using our YouTube channel
because we have one.
We should.
Oh yeah, check out our YouTube channel
for a video of us going something.
Leave a comment, leave a comment.
We already got an email.
We're gonna be posting me and Casey's excursion
into the woods there.
Link in the description of this episode.
I think we should do some,
like a little minor ghost hunt too.
We should.
Tonight.
I mean, we're going to the big ghost hunt next month.
The big one.
Yeah, the one up the sewer bay.
I fucking.
Oh, that's right.
I got the okay, so we're gonna be going up.
I can't believe none of you guys signed up
for that fucking tour.
I was working.
Of Pinewoods.
Like shit, dude, I am too.
I'm going on record right now saying
I am calling out that day.
I'll go if I, when is it?
Shit, what is it?
The fucking, I got it on my phone.
I'm going, I'm going.
Actually, Boat Boy is gonna be there for one hour.
He's gotta hop on a plane
because he's going on another vacation.
But he's gonna be there with his lady
for the first little bit of it.
And it's gonna be me and my lady.
I had to autistically talk her into it.
She must have thought it was a fucking long job.
Get some video of it.
We'll put it on our YouTube channel.
I will.
Can you take video?
I mean, I have a fucking phone.
I can take video.
I mean, are you allowed to?
Who gives a shit?
I'll fucking, Alex Jones that shit.
Well, it's a fucking tour group,
so they're gonna tell you not to.
Yeah, well, maybe I get one of those little spy
like tie clips.
I'll dress up in a suit for no reason.
Yeah.
Just blend in.
I'll be like the fucking,
infiltrating a secret society.
Dude.
No, you gotta fucking go.
The fucking Catholic crusades
were not only justified, but morally right.
Okay.
I don't know anything about them.
That's a stance.
I'm not gonna confirm or deny that.
So I'm gonna just put your,
based off of your delivery on that,
what you just said was very controversial.
It's not controversial, it was right.
That sounded even more controversial.
What do we have in terms of ghost hunting equipment?
I have an EMF detector, I have a thermal camera.
I have a night vision camera.
I have a spirit box.
I have a melmeter.
I have a-
What's a melmeter?
I got three Polaroids.
It's the fucking thing that we took,
the thing that's like the white box
with the orange screen on it.
Hmm.
I got a Polaroid and that's all I got.
You got an Oculus.
That looks like it'd be a good spot
for a seance right there.
Oh yeah.
What do you think, Tyler?
Holy shit.
Should we, guys, and I can't believe I'm saying this.
This is a bad thought.
Because I actually have a ghost story I haven't told.
But-
Well, why you been holding out, Ali Mac?
Let's hear it.
All right.
Wait, I just zoned the fuck out.
What the fuck were we talking about?
Dude, me too, bro.
We just turned into spooky stories and I got a good one.
Actually, it involves one of your current coworkers,
just to add things a little bit more.
Beepus?
No.
No, the other one.
The other one who I also worked very closely with.
Our Latino friend?
No.
No, think more Beepus.
Bro, him and Beepus were peas in a fucking pod.
I worked with him.
One of them just got engaged?
Potentially.
Is the woman you're speaking about the woman
that's your current coworker
and your ex- coworker at the old place?
I'm thinking of a male.
Yes, me too.
He's got a fucking cockatoo.
The one I always call cockatoo.
It's fucking hair.
All right, let's hear the story.
God damn it.
All right, so.
Old, this'll give it away.
Fucking dispatch.
Shit, why did I just say that?
No fucking dark episode.
It's a dark episode.
Fuck, I wanna be able to see, bro.
Kill the live light, Casey.
Kill the live light.
Oh, here we fucking go.
Kill it, kill it, kill it, kill it, kill it.
Shut her down.
Oh, baby.
Okay, okay, fine.
It does fit the purposes of the story, actually.
So, oh shit.
We even got Casey cranked down the brightness over there.
We're fucking going true dark here.
No, I was gonna say is, so, Ouija boards.
I've never really fucked with them too much.
I don't like those things.
It just seems some people just have really creepy stories
about them and they're the type of people
that don't usually try to bullshit about stuff.
They'll be like, I don't believe in ghosts,
but this one time I used a Ouija board.
Everybody has a fucking, yes.
That's a bad idea.
Yeah, but no, so we used to work in dispatch together
and it was prior to me being in dispatch with him.
I was still working just in the bus, but in the box.
But he brought a Ouija board to work with him
and used it with a coworker one day
and he was just brushing it off like it was nothing.
It was like, ah, whatever.
Like, it's a fucking Ouija board, whatever.
It was funny.
I'm being funny, we're at work.
So, when I started working with him
and we became like somewhat,
like we were starting to become more friends
rather than just coworkers.
He's like, oh, I'm gonna bring that shit in next week.
And I was like, no, you're fucking not.
It's like, don't fucking do that shit.
So, the one day he brought it in
just to like mess with me a little bit.
He messed around with it a little bit
because I was not gonna fuck around with it,
especially in the position I'm in.
I think it can affect things.
Like, on my end, it's gonna seem scary.
But it's like, dude, he just bringing him
that Ouija board to work and saying that shit,
it was like, the fucking night was a nightmare.
There was fucking shootings, stabbings,
like car accidents, and it was on both of our sides,
both the cities.
Like, we're both doing a different one.
And it was just, it was a fucking nightmare.
No, he just brought it.
Like I said, he didn't use it.
He was like, just honestly, like as a joke to be like,
hey, you said like, whoa, don't do it.
Like, he was just being like,
he was doing it to like be funny.
You didn't use it?
He didn't use it, but he just brought it in there.
And then it was a shit show night.
But he had used it, the thing that,
here's the catch though.
Here's the reason why I think
that there was some value to it.
He had that Ouija board in there with his coworker
prior to me being a dispatcher and did use it with them.
So that Ouija board had been used in that room
while we were dispatching and stuff.
And then that same Ouija board returned
with the request that I use it.
And I said no, but it's, I mean, like I said,
like you can go as much as you want to say and be like,
oh, you got to slide that thing to goodbye
or like say goodbye to it or else it comes back.
I don't fuck with Luigi boards.
Yeah, no, I don't fuck with Luigi boards either.
I don't fuck with that Luigi board.
I just fuck with the Mario board.
Well, dude, I'm just saying that night
was a fucking clusterfuck
and it seemed to calm down a little bit,
but like Tyler will remember, Casey, you didn't work
nearly as much, but like Tyler,
you remember during that time period,
it was a fucking nightmare.
Oh yeah.
I reached like a four month stretch
where it was just shit every time I was in that fucking booth.
Yeah, we hated him.
And it was like, and everybody hated me.
And the crazy thing was it wasn't even transports.
There wasn't a ton of transports.
There would occasionally be LDTs and Tyler loved those
because I let him get.
Dude, I loved LDTs too.
It let him get out of the shit show
that happened every night I was in there.
I would literally call fucking dispatch before I came in.
I'd be like, yo.
You text me.
You'd be like, hey, what's on the board?
And I'd be like, let me text Day Shift.
Like, I don't know, don't go in for three more hours.
Dude, I tried to hop on whatever LDTs I could get on.
Yeah, dude, they were great.
Even transports, just because it's like,
I just want to get out of the fucking mayhem, you know?
Dude, I'd say I can't.
But you can't.
No, you can.
I'm just saying.
You can a little bit, but not 100%.
You guys buying the Ouija boards at all, though?
Oh, yeah.
I almost wore a Ouija board shirt tonight.
Do you think he'd come?
Who?
The dude.
So do?
Yeah.
Yeah, he said he'd come.
No shit, really?
Bro, we got to have him in here.
I'll fucking talk to him about that.
Holy shit.
He fucking.
Would I know this guy?
I don't know.
No, I think he might have been.
He potentially could have been at the very end of your time.
When did you leave?
2018.
Yeah.
So he would have been at the very end of you.
What does his last name rhyme with?
So do.
No.
Blowers.
It's not, though.
No.
But it rhymes with it.
I don't think we need to bleep that.
I think that's an obscure enough thing.
Yeah.
I don't even know who that is.
Oh, yeah, of course.
OK.
Yes, bro, I want to.
I want to ask the boss just so I can say something so bad right now,
because I cannot say it on the pod, but let's have a smoke.
All right, shit.
It might be a smoke.
All right, episode 50.
We'll be back.
Something's up the basement.
Welcome back to our final podcast.
I'm a fucking episode 50 spectacular.
Sake is passed from China.
Try to steal your mind.
We're trying to show out a little here.
We had a little mishap.
Check it out.
I'm a fucking gay guy.
You know I really don't like red hot chili peppers.
I fucking love these guys.
You're such a hater.
I love these guys.
I was [? Godfits?].
You guys are just like, I don't want to listen to a funny song.
I want to listen to a gay song.
But that's not true!
This is taking so much heat.
Some of the best days of my life I have associated with red hot chili peppers.
Some of the best days of my life. You know how many best days of my life are associated with red hot chili peppers?
Fucking zero.
Well now there's one with Tyler.
So I can see.
I'm on episode 50 Tyler. That's not a big deal to you.
Fuck.
I've been here for more episodes than anybody besides Casey.
Okay, it doesn't mean I don't enjoy it. I'm a busy man.
I'm a busy man.
Get fucked by a fucking lead.
This is a conspiracy song.
You got, dude, you got one of the most staff lineups in band history.
You got fucking Anthony Kiedis, Chad Smith, Flea, and Mike Fruschanti.
And you're gonna tell me that they're not a good fucking band?
It's actually John.
John Fruschanti.
Yeah, and then they fucking replaced him with Josh Klinghoffer.
And he was not great.
He's back though.
Jack Miehoffer?
Wait, did fucking Fruschanti leave again?
No, he's back. He's back.
No, I know. But Klinghoffer, he's gone still.
Wow.
His solo projects are good, by the way, if you haven't listened to him.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Everybody sucks John, whatever his name is.
You know what I hate? I fucking hate him.
You don't like him.
I hate you too.
I love him. I love his...
Everybody sucks his dick.
I fucking hate you too.
I think he's good at guitar player.
I mean, I think Flea's the best person in the band.
I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about.
He's one of the greatest bassists of all time.
You know why this is a conspiracy song?
Yeah.
Why?
Because he's like,
I'm a very very bad man in the Hollywood basement.
He fucking fucked, fuck you mom.
I made a fucking dick in the Hollywood basement.
The fool that extinct, I wanna fuck your dad.
I hate the song because it's fucking gay.
That's what he's... Exactly.
Tell us about the California-cation conspiracy.
I hate California-cation.
No, no. Tyler just said it.
Oh, I thought he was just being autistic.
He says space may be the final frontier, but it's filmed in a Hollywood basement.
Oh, like the moon rail landing was fake.
Right.
I gotta make a best hits of Untitled.
I gotta make a best hits thing where we, where I play like the best moments of each episode.
What would they call that? Highlights.
Yeah, Highlights. Highlights of Untitled podcast.
Let me show you something you can use with your girlfriend in the bedroom.
You're gonna show me the handcuff knot?
I can tell by the way you're holding it.
I already know how the handcuff knot goes.
Yeah, give me a fucking...
We call this one the Texas...
Tyler and Ali-Mac just had a 20 minute, 30 minute conversation.
Oh, I know. Brother, I know.
You need a safety knot on there though.
What was the conversation about, Tyler?
Which one?
The half hour long conversation that you just had with Ali-Mac.
Oh, I just don't wanna lay my ass come.
You act like this has not been employed before.
I haven't done this.
You got to.
I've only done this on old ladies.
It worked.
Oh.
Is that good? You think that'd be okay?
I mean, I can...
But the thing is, they're not gonna try to fucking...
Right, right.
They're just for show.
Yeah.
But, yeah.
But, I mean, it's also a fucking...
If you have like a legit rope that's made for it,
which is what I have used, yeah.
You're good.
Yeah, I liked knot tying. I thought that was fun.
I hate fucking tying up girls for fucking sex. It sucks.
I love it.
Dude, how what?
You had the most fucking polarizing opinions on this shit.
How the fuck?
I don't mind getting tied up myself,
but when I have to tie it, it's like the mood's gone.
The mood's gone by the time you're done tying her up.
Either or.
I mean...
Like when you're like, all right, and she's like, all right, I'm ready,
and it's like, I'm not anymore.
Casey's going to get pissed off by what I have to say,
but honestly, it's the fucking wetness factor.
It's like I might be kind of losing it for a little bit,
and I'm tying her up, and I'm like, all right, yeah, I'm having to go tying.
So Train Man already gave us an answer.
Holy shit.
He gave us an answer already?
Let me finish this.
What?
Let me finish this, Casey. Don't detract from my statement here.
But you think, you start to lose it a little bit,
and you're like, wow, this is taking a lot longer than expected.
And then you get there, and then as soon as you fucking go in once...
As long as it's not blood, Ali Mac, right?
As long as it's not blood.
I don't give a fuck if it is blood.
Throw a towel down. We're going in.
God damn it.
2020, grow a shed.
Casey tried to avoid me so hard.
Grow a shed. It's a normal body thing. It happens.
I'm not fucking with blood.
Oh my fucking God.
It's not like necrophilia.
It's close enough.
No, it's not.
I'm not about that length.
Jesus Christ.
You're not driving in there day one when you got to clot the size of a fucking baseball.
You're waiting until that shit's out of the way.
Mike the Trade Man replied to our riddle.
He says, it's an electric train. There is no smoke.
Oh!
He got it right!
Let's tell him that he wins!
He gets to be in our group chat.
No, he won a doorknob.
He won a doorknob.
We didn't actually come up with a prize, but...
He won a doorknob.
Next week there will be a prize.
We'll negotiate.
Tyler, I'm leaving it up to you to reply to Mike the Trade Man this time.
Who told him the riddle?
I did.
Did you send it in Morse code?
Yeah, I did.
That is awesome. Mike the Trade Man, you win.
You got to respond, Tyler, by being like, dearest Michael.
Damn.
Dearest Michael, it was a pleasure having you on our game show.
Ali Mack, what's this not?
You tell me this one right here.
You tell me this for one dollar.
You win one dollar.
Oh, I'm sorry.
That's a pretzel.
I'm pretty sure you were going for a figure eight.
God damn it, let me do it first.
You got to get a plate on that.
You got to get a plate on it.
Jesus Christ, I was the fucking nots lieutenant at my old fire department.
I had to teach that shit.
That's a thing.
I mean, not everywhere.
A not lieutenant?
No, it was just like that was worth it.
Yeah, you're not a lieutenant because you're just doing nots.
No, I did other shit too.
I told him he won a fabulous prize on a doorknob.
Oh yeah, how do you do that?
Let me show you how to do it.
I'll do it.
And he says, oh joy, just what I always wanted, a doorknob.
Congrats.
There'll be a big prize next week.
This podcast is off the rails.
Even harder.
So if you want to do a figure eight on a bite.
What the fuck is happening?
We're tying nots.
You just take an end and you treat this like it's a single row.
So now you're going to go around.
Yeah.
That's right.
Hold on.
I got to echo.
Dude, I.
What?
We're at nine.
Oh, I can't believe I'm here.
There you go.
I was reading the.
You know, you have to figure eight.
This is the same thing.
You start with a figure eight.
Welcome back.
Ali Mac.
Are you dialed in?
Oh, I'm fucking dialed in, bro.
Are you ready to win this game show?
Dude, any other episode, if you ask me to tie this knot, I would look at you like I had
fucking cerebral palsy.
So I'm fucking no, despite what the masses.
I'm fucking.
All right.
We're back.
What's the one from John?
Oh, my God.
He's reading big news.
Big news.
The train man is reading the making of the miracle.
Mike Arizioni's untold story of the captain of the 1980 Olympics gold team.
Oh, shit.
Oh, my good God.
I'm going to fuck this up.
I know how it's done.
What's the one with the with the story of the bunny?
You guys are fucking playing with your.
What's the.
I'm here with your seven time returning to.
God damn seven times.
This is just an abortion.
Somebody's got to dethrone him next fucking time.
I'm starting a petition to do not.
Because I think I can win that one.
We got three times.
The most popular.
Are you talking about the quote?
You're talking about.
That's a tough.
Shut the fuck up.
Three times.
The clove hitch.
Zero time.
I'm going to back on this one yet to win an episode.
Oh, baby.
That's a nut.
If I've ever seen one.
That's a globetrot.
Damn, that's a beautiful.
You're going to.
Let me see that.
This is the fucking.
We love this.
So we're going.
To do the chaos.
Nope, too much.
I'm going to do the chaos.
This episode.
Welcome back.
Oh my God.
They're going to think we're on fucking coke.
Jesus Christ.
Nancy Pelosi's pits back in the fucking sixties were fantastic.
You still have yet to get a win.
What's your strategy?
Today is play every fucking the same as always.
Tom, it's fucking we're going to come in every day.
We bet everything.
Tom, you, you're Tom.
But.
Fucking love him.
Fucking.
I'm no homeless.
But no, no.
My strategy is daily.
I mean, double jeopardy.
You bet everything every time.
Wager at the end.
You bet everything every time.
It doesn't matter.
You can be in first.
Be a man.
All right.
We'll see if I hold true.
Before that, before jeopardy even starts, if this happens to be an answer for any of them,
I automatically win.
OK.
What is vodka?
Wait, we all need, we all need one answer that if you potentially are you fucking kidding
me?
Watch that be a daily double.
If that's a daily double.
If that's an answer to any question, I automatically win.
Well, in that case, I got to think it's true.
Your category is so impossible.
My answer is red hot chili peppers.
If they're included, I get the points.
My answer is Nancy Pelosi's fucking juicy tits in the 1960s.
God bless.
If he actually I'm rooting for you.
I hope you get that one.
All right.
First question.
For the categories today, we got movies about space.
OK.
Translations.
OK.
Song of the Year.
Untitled podcast.
Oh, so 50 baby.
Yeah, well, I'm going to blow that cardinal directions and potent potable.
I won Tyler's pick first.
We'll do untitled podcast podcast for 200 name.
Oh, we're good.
Name of the first episode of Untitled podcast.
What is Chinese democracy?
Oh, yeah.
I knew that.
I knew that too.
Fuck.
I had no idea.
Motherfucker.
It's just you and him.
Yeah, it's just you two.
How could you not?
Fuck.
I've listened to that one like four times for 400 flight 93 went down in this Pennsylvania.
Oh, God.
I'm not going to win this one.
You guys are too quick.
Even with the Adderall, it's not helping.
That's dance.
Potable.
For 200.
Kind of beer Walt prefers in Gran Torino.
What is was Paps Blue Ribbon?
Oh, Pat Blue Ribbon.
Wow.
I was going to say a quote from that movie, but it's incredibly racist.
So I can't shy away from that.
Yeah, we got a little bit of an echo here.
Echo.
All right.
Tyler's.
No, it's my pick.
Oh, fuck.
Jesus fucking.
Sorry.
Jesus Christ.
All right.
Whatever category that last one was from, because I got it.
Yeah.
Martinis can be made with either of these two.
What are olives?
Oh, what's olive juice?
What is either of these two?
What is gin?
What is vodka and rum to Martinis can made with either of these two liquors?
What is vodka?
That's one.
What is what is what is vodka?
What is vodka?
That's bullshit.
Yeah, vodka gin.
He's asking for two.
I said two.
That wasn't the full answer, Dan.
You gotta give me something for that.
No, you don't.
I was thinking that when you said that.
You gotta give me something for that.
Okay.
You gotta give me something.
I say you give me full credit, but you also give him half credit to the question.
Dan gets half credit.
That's like an impossible thing that I just did.
No, it's not.
It's the third question in.
There's always the category potent potable.
All right, Ali back.
Sometimes it is potable.
200 points.
200 for that impossible half of the answer.
That was a Hail Mary.
I didn't even know the question.
Five minutes before the question came out, I said if this happens to be the answer for any of the questions, I automatically win.
And you got automatically win.
I thought you just got the points for it.
If it comes down.
I wouldn't agree with that.
The final question to me winning or losing automatically win.
Okay.
You mean if it's a tiebreaker, you know, if it's a tiebreaker, I say we give them that.
You can tell me that wasn't no, I come out with that.
You're not impressed by that.
Yeah.
One word in the English dictionary.
You gotta give him.
Yeah.
You know, the category in every, every, because it's going to be the answer.
Well, it was also potable the past two episodes.
All right.
Well, we got 400 points for Alimak.
All right.
Keep it going.
Potent potables.
600.
This drink is named after a New York City borough.
What is a Long Island?
Yeah, he got it.
He got it.
God damn it.
That's Tyler's.
God damn it.
It's all right.
Damn.
Fucking lock it in.
Untitled podcast for 600.
Damn, we got this.
Oh shit.
Where's the fucking.
You got 800 points.
Let's make it true.
Oh shit.
The four people that are on Mount Rushmore.
That's going to be Thomas Jefferson.
It's going to be Abe Lincoln and that's going to be Teddy Roosevelt.
Teddy Roosevelt.
George Washington.
Abe Lincoln.
Yes.
Teddy Roosevelt and Thomas Jefferson.
Yeah.
That was important potable.
No, that was an untitled podcast.
Oh, okay.
I was about to throw a fit there.
I was going to say that's a bullshit question.
That makes sense though.
Untitled podcast for 800.
This episode was named after an entity.
What is the the solar plexus clown glider?
Oh my God.
It was on the tip of my fucking penis.
Untitled podcast.
Oh my God.
For a thousand.
The film was the this film was the first schizophrenic movie.
Oh, that's what is back to the future.
Yeah, it's back.
I mean, that was a tough one.
I was like, I think it was back to the future, but I didn't say I wasn't even on that episode.
Just so everybody knows.
No, I think you were.
No, I was on back to the future part too.
That was the first time I heard about it.
You got movies about space.
Movies about space.
All right.
What is Apollo 13?
200.
Ryan Gosling plays Neil Armstrong in this film.
No.
Can you finish the question?
You are right.
Gosling plays Neil Armstrong in this 2018 film.
What is first landing?
It was close though.
What is the first contact?
What is first space?
We're timed out.
First man.
I said that.
You got six questions first.
I said that.
He did say that.
I did say that.
He timed out.
That's mine.
You're close.
That's fucking mine.
You're close.
That's fucking mine.
You're allowed to get seed back now to the Grand Champ.
Well, he said it before the timer.
I did.
You heard it about 15 times.
Me and Dan exhausted our guesses and he got six more.
Jesus fucking Christ.
The preference on the show is insane.
Dan, how are we ever going to win?
We're not going to win.
No, fuck this.
We're fucking rigged against here.
This is bullshit.
We got movies about space, translations, song of the year, cardinal directions, potent potable.
Shove a potent potable up your ass.
All right.
What year was this song come out?
Irreplaceable by Beyonce.
What is 2006?
2010.
2004.
2009.
What is 2002?
2013.
2007.
What the fuck?
Casey, that's a retarded fucking question.
I'm just going to come out and say it.
You know nobody here listens to Beyonce.
You knew it was going to be a guessing game.
And now me and Dan get fucked over because of it.
Go fuck yourself.
Tyler, I can't even look at you right now.
I'm so mad.
Tyler's bird.
I'm so mad.
Tyler's bird.
Let's go, music.
Song of the Year for 400, Hey Jude by The Beatles.
What is-
What is nyEen I like to fucking guess is to fucking potty.
Casey Casey literally said well you're close
And then you fucking had six more guesses and then got it you said first space
Act like you knew that god fucking damn it that was retarded and so was that question
Let's do movies about space and what does apollo 13?
For 400 Donald Glover appears in this 2015 space film the Martian
Well, it's not the dude who's screaming fucking bashing his face
That's a Tyler's big base space space for 600
What is gravity year preceding a space Odyssey in the film's title was to?
do
You both got at the same time said you're proceeding so I was thinking it's the space up, okay?
It's called 2001 a space out of here, but what's the here proceeding? Oh?
Question I guess 2003 times before I said 2001 that's gonna be a split between Tyler and Ali back
first
retarded question
2001 you said the year proceeding so me and Tyler both said 2000
Proceeding a space Odyssey. Yeah space Odyssey that shit happened
2001 sure was written before oh my god. I'm gonna fucking blow up
Tyler's big I'm gonna break your deck's race
space for 600
weird to them for 800 stars
George Clooney Clooney and Sandra was gravity
Yes, I guess that
I'm the last Ali Max pick you got another space one there right yeah, all right fuck it this 1990 five film was
And that is when it came out
I did pick I translation song of the year cardinal directions
We don't have
free hundred
Yeah, we got 2000
What's the school? Yeah? Yeah? Let's get the let's get the one down on the scores before the wager here
I'll do
You don't know how much you you don't know how much you'd us to have though. Ali Max got 2700 Todd's got 35
Oh
400
Yeah, all right get back in
Tramadol is this class of drug?
Tramadol is a hold on
It's a sedative
On Triton Tramadol Tramadol. What was the question? Just repeat the tramadol is this class of drug?
I'm gonna say it's a
Fuck man, I
Know I know it's it's uh, it's like a downer
I'm gonna say it's a sedative
I would be an opioid fuck. Oh, damn really shit. I was gonna go fucking barbiturate with that fucker. God. All right, Dan
I should have known I got a lecture on that shit two days ago
a snow cone is doing this drug mix with alcohol
What is cocaine?
Yeah, god damn it that took me way too long to put together so with alcohol I was like what do you put with cocaine
I have the answer and I'm not saying it
Translation song of the year
Translations alright. Goodbye in French
What is a do you have you?
You a do you
Eight-time champion
I gotta keep my although I do also meets goodbye. So I'll actually get points on that too
I answered before anybody on I like to say I said nobody know I said what is that do you before anybody opens their mouth?
Play it back guarantee you I had both answers
Well, then why am I not getting full credit? I answered with a do before anybody open their mouth. All right, you got it
This game to Tyler's favor keep it translations
Translations for 400. Hello in Japanese was Konichiwa
Translations, please in Spanish was poor for war
Translations up there. Yeah
Thank you in German. Okay fuck what is okay?
I mean, I would have just not that quick you had it quick. I'll give you no German you fucking retard
Hey, you don't know what is though. That's tough. Oh, yeah
That's bullshit I said what is
Then you've answered with what is
Fucking crack. Yeah episode 50 you should know what is by the fucking credit Casey
What are my categories translation
Give me translation. All right a thousand big in Italian grande
Um, no, hold up fuck fuck. Oh my god. It's muchisimo. Oh
Pico manja
I know this too. What is it music when it means get bigger crescendo?
What is wrong with it? Oh
Play it back you fucking listen to it when he posts it we say what is every time
What is
Answers you just say them first cuz you cheat and then say what is
We've been letting you get away with it for fucking this is a time
Time is gonna be a champion
Put our foot down
I got you the points for that. That's bullshit. You see you see this shit, Dan
It's fucking bullshit
And I didn't say what is would they give me the points Casey well they give you a chance to say what kids kids these days
Yeah, but if I said grande and then the person next to me said what is one day? I'm fucked
If you give him the body answered incorrectly
You're just giving positive reinforcement for that I will give him the consolation prize of the choice
For throwing a temper exactly
The only way he gets the points is if he does does it smell alright, it's not even a penalty though
We all do that shit all the time
For smelling salt I disagree with that whole heart. He can he can have the points for smelling salt. This is bullshit
You're compromising your integrity now
He did get it alright. It's punishment for the temperature
Because we don't want to positively reinforce
Question and he already forgot we're already okay
I got song we just went over the final directions
600 love yourself Justin Bieber, what is 2000 was 2006?
What is 2018? What is 2016?
Dan's pick song of the year 800 tick-tock by Kesha. What is 2012?
What is 2010?
What is 2010 what is oh?
Okay, now he gets the point now he gets the fucking sound you okay?
Crack it in your fucking penis so then you have to piss out glass in the next three days
Yeah, 10 for a time champ keep it goes pick fucking keep on going
1000 say what is this time?
Macarena by the Bayside boys what is 1995?
1983 I think I got that we all said 96. I didn't
Dan you got cardinal directions only category left
Okay
Directions 200 Madagascar in relation to Mozambique. What is South South East South?
With south what is what is north that'll be east I said what is east first before anybody yeah you did
What do you mean? Yeah, you did
Heard it. I heard somebody say what is the east I don't know it was fucking me. Let's go
Oh cardinal direction wait so when we all shout this out at you, and you know it's guesses
You'll hear it, and you just know I knew it was fucking east
Madagascar is fucking off the East Coast of Africa. Yeah, we know Alex Trebek's taking heat today
Production level here
NFL this shit all right colorado in relation to why oh what is west what is south?
South East East what's north?
Northeast south
I'm sure one of us said that for sure. I said south to I said south as well
Just go into the next one do this
Cardinal directions category can suck my dick
This is retarded all right. We all know yes, we throw another one. I'm going to love it
Hanoi was the capital of this Vietnam during the South wait. What is uh?
God yes, what is Cambodia?
Oh, we're guessing I know that I don't know that was a thing. I'm gonna be a long order
I'm going to go north and south or in the Cold War because they're very hot in South and yeah
What the fuck was that one in North? Yeah?
We're keeping up with this side. I'm not going to go because Saigon was in the south and I know I was in the north
Jesus cardinal directions for 800 for Tyler
You got 7100 what's everybody else's score?
I'm not Scott forty seven hundred Dan's got thirty two hundred. That's two hundred dollars
But this territory is a Canadian province
Cardinal directions the Northern Territory
I'll be Northwest
And finally for a thousand
Pittsburgh in relation to Cleveland what is what east oh?
What is North these
We got too many points shut the fuck up. I got that rewind that I got no now rewind my
Didn't hear I was too busy thinking
All right, what's the fucking final job Dan's got forty two hundred how much forty two hundred?
How's that alley max got forty seven hundred Tyler's got sixty nine hundred?
I gotta get my phone
Standby standby I'll be standing by what was the what's the what's the what's the category?
Categories world history
Oh
My god dude, I can't believe this oh my god. You can see my phone just died
This is the most controversial episode of jeopardy here. You can just type it out on my phone
Or no you can't because then you'll see the rest
I'm gonna go there and wager all right. You'll just give us your answer when they're when they're not no I can't I
Can't say that no you'll just give us our answer once they've submitted theirs oh
Okay, yeah, but you still know what I'm waiting on the category is world history Casey. You still don't know what I'm wagering
All right, you know what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go ahead and
All right, you've got to come over here alley back
Tyler you gotta get a wager all right
All right
Question is the Soviet Union was dissolved in this year
I like you gotta come type it in I got a thing for a minute though
I was gonna guess already
All right, I'll even ask coming over to type in his answer
You said what is that's a good thing all right
I'll put in what is
I'm just gonna put what is so you don't fuck me up. This is just a total fucking guess
Dude everybody's fucking stressing the fuck out
No no no no no I need to
Everyone's stressing out man
All right, alley back changed it he's he did say 1984, but now he says 1983
Don't tell me I fucked it
Don't tell me I changed it from the right answer
Nope that's incorrect alley mac you bet it all yeah, it's okay Dan says what 1989
Dan we can't keep letting him get away with this he better be wrong
Tyler says 1991
Tyler comes away with 13,800
God damn
Dude I knew that because Ukraine became a country in 1991
I should have fucking known
I should have fucking known 1989
I didn't even think of that
I didn't even think of the fucking Ukraine thing
Oh my god
Tyler wins again
Tyler wins
I fucking hate this podcast
You wonder why I show up once every six weeks
Hey dude tie for zero
I did say vodka was one of the answers
These two are holding their heads
I automatically win
Holding your heads in shame
God damn these fucking smelling socks
Give me that fucking thing
It never gets easier
Losing to Tyler never gets easier
God damn
The fucking trivia king over here
He won't even sleep in Girlcom
Oh my god
Look at him man
He's so good
Oh my god
Look at him man
He won't sleep in a fucking wet spot from Lovemaking
Tyler we got a prize for this episode
Episode 50
We got two dollars
Wow
Let me see that
That's a real authentic two dollar bill
Let me see
You know I knew I was on the spectrum
When I went to like get a deposit out of the bank when I was a kid
And just to be an asshole I get two dollar bills
Cause they let you do it
They don't charge you anything more
That's a real two dollar bill
Yeah that's a real two dollar bill
Yeah you can get them from the bank
You can still get them
This is fucking sweet dude
Let's see what kind of fucking crazy shit we can find
I was rooting for you guys
Yo was there a cryptid on there
You were rooting for us
You did Tyler points every junction you could
I was trying to be fair bro
FAIR!
You're letting him answer questions without what is
Call it fair
Alex drew back with piss on your grave
Not rolling his
You get up and fucking piss on your grave with a skeleton
And for that we love you Alex
Alright I'm Tyler Podcast
Episode 50
We're gonna take a break
And we'll be back
The next morning
That's a fucking boat
She's sea worthy
It'll float
I can't unfold this now
It's my lucky dollar
Welcome back motherfuckers
What is this the fucking dark night
No bro
We got some schizophrenic movie reviews to do
Which movie
We got
We made it to the end of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows
Oh my god yeah
You're right this is the last one
This is a return
Episode 50 we gotta finish out Harry Potter
The last Harry Potter episode Tyler
Man it's been a long journey to get here
Well actually we got
Part 1 and 2 so we'll see how far we make it
The last movie is split into two parts
Or the last book is split into
Two parts
No the last book is just one part
I feel like episode 50
You gotta make it a double feature
Yeah so
I see you bang out one and two but you abbreviate
You hit the big points
So we start off
We start off
So last time on Harry Potter
Dumbledore got fucking murdered
Yo he's fucking dead
He's fucking dead
Voldemort's back
And Harry's like
We gotta skip school and fucking
Defeat Voldemort right
So they're out there
Looking for fucking horcruxes
Right so Dumbledore has seven
Souls right
He split his soul into
Seven parts
Voldemort does it's not Dumbledore you fucking
Yes Voldemort split his soul into
Seven and so now they have to
Destroy the seven horcruxes
That are
Encompassed
In his soul
So they're like we're not going back to school
But we're gonna go to a wedding real quick
And when they go to this fucking wedding
Then the Death Eaters come and they just blow up the fucking wedding
Wait and just to recap
This dude fucking Voldemort
He's the fucking dude
From like the second movie but
He's the dude from every movie
That's been trying to kill Harry
What was his name when he was a fucking student
Tom Riddle
Yeah well he looks fucking nothing like him anymore
So we start off
And we got Snape
Walking into this
Old decrepit house
And we see Voldemort there
With his fucking followers
The Death Eaters
And they're like Snape join us
And he's just like
And they see all the Death Eaters
And they have this fucking woman floating
On the table Oh yeah and he gets fucking
Eated by a snake
There's just this old woman
On the table that is
Petrified and they're all laughing at her
And they're like
We're gonna move the boy at midnight
And he's just like okay
And they're like we're gonna move the boy next week
So they're trying to kill Harry basically
While he's being moved
From his uncle's house
To Ron's house
Where Ron's house
They're having a wedding
So just describe this to me cause I've never been able
To wrap my head around this
Why are they just going so hard
To kill Harry again
So because 20 years ago Voldemort tried to kill him
Right
Why though?
And because there was a prophecy
That said you can't live
While this boy survives
There will be a boy born at the end of
July that will take you down
So he's trying to kill this guy
He tried to murder him when he was a baby
And
It deflected off of him
And he basically
Went to the Shadow Realm
So they're like
Alright we're gonna kill Harry while he's getting
Moved to his uh to Ron's house
And they're like
Who's this old bitch on the on the table
Who's like oh this is the uh
Muggle, the Muggle Professor
Study from Hogwarts
And like we fucking hate muggles which is basically
The equivalent of a truce
And he's like he's got this fucking snake with him and he's like
Dinner
No he just goes what was it Nagini
Nagini
And the snake like
Slithers and so now the snake
Zooms in on the camera and the snake just goes
At the camera and you're like whoa that's fucking
Pretty spooky my guy and so now
Snape is a Death Eater I like the hand motion
Snape is a Death Eater
That's trying to kill Harry
So Harry, Ron and Hermione are going out to kill
Fucking Voldemort
And Hermione literally fucking
Deletes her parents memories
Like just straight up deletes the memories
She's like god bless her cause they're like
They're like oh Hermione
Are you coming down for dinner? She's like
I'm coming down for dinner for a second
And she starts like crying
She fucking erases their memories
Like literally there's just some pictures on the wall
Where like it's obviously a family picture
But like she deletes herself out of it
With like magic and it just looks like
The fucking parents are just standing there like this
Like you know how like the dad like puts
Like his hands on like his like kids shoulders
And he's just doing that and there's just nothing there
There's also just pictures that are just of nothing
They're just like of a background cause they were
Hermione I always thought that was really fucking
Funny when I watched it cause she's like
Erasing all the pictures and there's just like
Pictures on the wall that are just of grass
Cause she wasn't there
So basically they're like we gotta move
Harry from his uncle house
So why does Hermione do that? Is she like all edgy and hates her parents?
So that no so that Dumbledore doesn't
Kill her parents
And like it's fucking Voldemort
Voldemort you're fucking confusing the fuck out of me
It's like I thought he was dead shit
So Voldemort doesn't get to her basically
Okay
So basically they're going to
They're trying to get Harry to Ron's house
From his uncle's house
And so they're like Harry
They all come there and they're like Harry
We're gonna change into
All the Harrys
Polyjuice potion of every single Harry
So there's gonna be like seven
Seven people that look like Harry
Like Ron, Hermione
His brothers and shit
The fucking guy with one eye
So this is a way of safely transporting them
They're already worried about him getting fucked up
Yeah because once he turns 17
The magical spell
That protects him
Is gone
So then he can be
Murdered
But the prophecy's already written
They already said he was gonna fucking kill him
No they said one of them
Is going to kill the other one
They said none can live
While the other survives
So basically one of them
Has to kill the other one in order to survive
But they've been doing fine so far
Yeah that's like a plot hole
This other guy reads a fucking scroll and just loses his mind over it
Like he's not dying cause Harry's alive
Yeah
So they're like Harry we're gonna change into seven of you
And transport you to Ron's house
So they all fucking take Polyjuice potion
And they change into Harry
Into like seven Harrys
And then they fucking uh fly
To Ron's house
And they get intercepted by the Death Eaters
And they literally have like a fucking
Like some
Flight simulator fucking
Pew pew pew pew pew
Shit going on and they're just like getting shot out of the sky
And shit and like there's
And then fucking Hagrid's on a motorcycle
A flying motorcycle with a sidecar
Yeah Harry gets on a flying motorcycle with Hagrid
And he fucking
Rides to Ron's house but fucking
The Death Eaters come
And they shoot at him and they fucking kill
Hedwig his owl
Oh no the snow owl
Yeah oh that thing was fucking
Awesome I like that thing
Afterwards they find out that uh
Mad-eyed Moody has also been killed
The guy from the fourth movie
And uh
So they go to Ron's house and they come back
And he's dead too
Yeah he's dead
So they go to Ron's house and uh his brother
George his brother Fred
And George, George gets his ear blown off
By Voldemort
Yeah he's all like oh my fucking ear
So he gets his fucking ear blown off
And they're like Voldemort they make fucking
Ear jokes they're like your ears are all
Holy
So they go to they do that shit
Shit
And they're like oh we got a wedding to go to
Because Ron's brother
Is getting married to a hot chick
From the fourth movie
Yeah the fucking french chick
We do this fucking wedding
And uh Dumbledore's getting
Fucking Dumbledore's memory
Is getting fucking uh
Destroyed
Can you not keep saying Dumbledore is Voldemort
No I'm talking about Dumbledore
Remember they wrote the book about him
And they were like oh
Dumbledore is a fucking asshole
Sure
Wait they said Dumbledore is an asshole
Yeah they wrote the after Dumbledore died
They wrote this book about him
And they were like oh Dumbledore
You know he was
Yeah he was like not
What he seemed to be like he had like
Family issues and he was like a
Bad guy right so Harry's like
What the fuck
And during the middle of the wedding
The uh there's a message
That comes out
And it's a horcrux and they're like
They're coming for you the death eaters
Are coming
And they're like oh shit we gotta get the fuck out of here
Yo I would fuck
So then they get the fuck out of there
And they uh transport to a random
Place in London and they
That's when they go to the diner
Yeah
And they see the death eaters
No I thought that was the fourth group
I thought that was the eighth group
Fucking so funny
No this is this one and they're like
We gotta fuck these people up
So they shoot fucking spells at the death eaters
And they fucking fuck them up
They're like should we kill him and he's like nah
Fuck them up Harry fuck them up
Uh
Yeah so they do that shit
They go back to Sirius's
Place to fucking live
They go hide out at Sirius's
Old place
And they look in the locket that they got
From the last movie and it says like
The real horcrux has
Been stolen
And they're like
Okay where was the last
Horcrux
Where was it Casey
What where was it
Well so they go to this house elf
Creature who is the uh
Who is the uh fucking Dobie
No no no creature
He's the house elf of Sirius's old place
He's a real racist piece of shit
Oh shit
He's a real racist piece of shit
And he's like yeah I gave it to this guy
Bandungus Black he's a thief
He fucking stole
All of the shit out of this house
And uh now he has the
Horcrux
So he's they're like who did you give it to
And it's fucking Umbridge
Right from the fucking fifth movie that bitch
That bitch
And they're like okay we gotta go get this fucking
Horcrux from the fucking uh
From this bitch so she works at the
Ministry of magic right
So they plan this whole thing to get into the
Ministry of magic
And uh
So they flush themselves in in the toilet
Oh
They're like
So the ministry of magic
By the way at this point has been taken
Over by Voldemort and the death eaters
And they're like
Just fucking killing muggles for fun
Oh awesome so now
They're just committing terrorism
Is there any justification behind that
Well they're like so
If you were born to a muggle born
Then you're like basically not a wizard
Yeah so they're trying to kill everybody that's not a wizard
Yeah so basically they're committing genocide
Jesus Christ
Yeah I don't understand some of this stuff
No you shouldn't
So they go basically
They go in the fucking ministry
And they're like we gotta get this fucking
Locket so they fuck around in the ministry for a while
And then they're like they go to see
Fucking Umbridge and she's like
Do it a trial for this bitch who's like
You're not a real wizard
You're a fucking fake witch
Cause your parents were muggles born
And Harry's like fuck you Dolores
I will not tell lies
And he fucking goes stupefy
And he just fucking pitches her
On the fucking
On the fucking thing Jesus Christ
So basically
They get the real locket that has Voldemort's
Soul in it
And they don't have a way
To defeat it
They don't have a way to kill it
So
They're like shit how are we gonna
Destroy this thing
And then Ron's like fuck
Tyler
I need some help here
Ron's like fuck I'm a really sad boy now
Oh yeah he's like you're trying to fuck Hermione
Aren't you
Yeah you're trying to fuck Hermione
And fucking Hermione's like what the fuck are you talking about man
Ron's like we are
Like fucking six things to find
And we aren't any fucking closer to finding it
Than we are to fucking destroying this
And he's also like you're trying to fuck my girlfriend Harry
And then like doesn't like when they open up
Like the locket like it just shows like Harry
And Hermione like fucking
Naked and just making out and shit
Yeah so Ron's like fuck this
Everybody I know is getting fucking
Killed and he's like I'm going home
He's like I'm abandoning you guys
And going home and they're like fuck
Wait so is this Harry
Or Ron that's gonna be a sad boy
Ron
Harry's always sad
So Ron's always wearing this locket around his chest
That's a fucking horcrux
That has Voldemort's soul inside
So it's causing him to be basically
Depressed
So he's like fuck I'm going home
And then Harry and Hermione are like alright
I think we should check
In Godric's Hollow
Which is the place that your parents are
So they don't know it's the fucking necklace that's
Fucking with Ron yet
They can kind of figure it out but they can't
They don't have a way to destroy it
They're always wearing the necklace because
They don't want to lose it
It's causing him to be
Real fucking Eevee
You could just take it off
Yeah I know I know
But they're like we're gonna go check in Godric's
Hollow which is where your fucking
Parents die
So even Ron knows about this thing?
Yeah Ron knows
Just take it off
That's the thing
I'm not trying to pick up on this
He's like I saw you two earlier you two were holding
Hands and he's like fuck you
So they go back to
Where Harry was born in his hometown where his parents
Live
And he finds his parents graves on Christmas
And they're like oh shit Hermione
It's Christmas and he's like I found my
Parents graves and he fucking
Cries about it and shit
And then Hermione
Hugs him
And then they go to the place where
Harry's parents were murdered in his
Old house
And they're like
Alright this fucking woman
Named Bathilda Bagshot
Which is this old lady that was
Friends with Doubledore told
Like went up to
Harry and Hermione and was like
Yeah come with me and she fucking
Takes him to the place
Where Harry's parents were murdered
And she doesn't fucking
Speak to them
And she takes Harry upstairs and she's like
Oh
Yeah
And she's speaking the fucking snake language
Hermione does? No this old woman
Bathilda Bagshot
That's just in the house
But she's actually not her
It's actually a fucking fake thing
Yeah it's actually a fucking
Snake so the fucking snake
Comes out of the old lady
starts attacking Hermione Jesus and the snake and so the snake attacks Hermione
and breaks fucking Harry's or a wand Harry's like fuck it's like my fucking
one now my fucking wand and then so they go back and they're like fuck that was
shit that was shitty and then they see what Ron come back yeah Ron comes back
and he's like it was Christmas and I didn't want to abandon you so I took my
fucking lighter and it led me to you yeah oh so Harry's out in the fucking
woods one day and he's trying to he's like fucking around and he sees the sword
of Gryffindor in a pond frozen in the ice and he's like well fuck I better get
that sword then he goes down the fuck is this sword of Gryffindor it's some long
lost artifact or something yeah yeah it's like a sword that can defeat anything
oh and they just make this up now or do they talk about it it was he used it in
the second movie to defeat the big snake it can't be destroyed but in anything
that could destroy it makes it stronger okay so so he dives into the fucking
thing and he's all like I'm diving into the fucking water and then there's just
demons and shit that are trying to drown him now this is when Ron comes back
because Ron saves him from drowning so he's like he's like and then fucking
Ron's like hey buddy I saved you did you fuck my girlfriend Harry's basically
trying to dive into ice to get this thing and you started he's like trapped
under the fucking ice and he's like fucking help me and Ron fucking pulls
him out of the water and he gets the sword of Gryffindor and he's like
sword of Gryffindor and the locket so he's like oh that's when the locket
opens yeah he's like Ron we gotta destroy this thing so he opens the locket
with his fucking snake language and they see fucking Harry and Hermione fucking
it's literally like it's literally slapping the face from Voldemort yeah so
they see they see like a bunch of shit that Ron that's like designed to
basically piss Ron off and he's like kill it Ron and then Ron fucking
stabs the locket and he's fucking they got one part of Voldemort soul destroyed
oh that's one yeah they got a ways to go fuck that so they fucking destroy this
locket and they get back with her mighty and runs like she's fucking mad at me
now like yeah you think so they're like okay I think we should go talk to Luna's
dad yeah who's a fucking schizo right so basically before early in the movie the
minister of magic left Harry Ron and Hermione this is this is literally what's going on in the
fucking thing like oh boy yeah and Ron's like what the fuck bro yeah so Dumbledore in his will left Ron
Harry and Hermione like a couple items out of commission right now yeah so this
will bring you back into it this is what was going on the locket damn this is
Harry Potter yeah no fucking Emma Watson right there what this is allowed yeah
Harry Potter yeah I was in the fuck yeah that's like softcore porn oh my goodness
so that scene later so Dumbledore left Harry and Ron and Ron like a lighter
that would like get back to him and he left Harry like the golden snitch he won
his first quench man he's like you know open at the close what the fuck does that
mean he said it says I will open at the close and he left her mind open at the
close yeah okay and he left Hermione this this book of children's stories and it
had the Deathly Hollows and it had a story about the Deathly Hollows which
are like these items that can make the where the master of death so they go to
see fucking Luna's dad and he's wearing who is like he's like he has like a
podcast like a wizard podcast like a podcast he's like fuck Voldemort we're
gonna fucking help you Harry and they go to him and he's like tell me about the
Deathly Hollows and he's like what the fuck do you see say the fuck did you
just say they're like so first of all there was this fucking resurrection
stone who can bring back the dead which is on a ring yeah and there's fucking
the invisibility cloak which he already has and there's the fucking other one
which is the most powerful wand to ever exist which dumb it exists and death
fashion these for like three blood brothers back in the day and now you
have it Harry so like oh fuck but he's like oh the death eaters are fucking
asking me to turn you in so I'm gonna go call them and he's like he's like all
right I'm calling the fucking death eaters and they fucking show up at his
house and start fucking attacking you're hiding them under the floorboards aren't
you and they start fucking bombarding this guy's house looking for Harry and
Harry's like oh shit and then they fucking apparate away yeah and where
they go they go fucking they don't go to serious black house right dude there's
a whole bunch of filler that happens fucking oh no that's when they start
going to the woods yeah but there's like a whole bunch of filler that happens
they end up finding the ring that's like the death ring fucking they go through I
think the I think they find like the goblet in this second part but like they
go through all this shit and then at the end of this movie fucking Voldemort
finds don't wait so they go to they go to Malfoy's house right yeah this is
when fucking Dobby gets fucking so they're in the woods one day and there
is like these fucking snatchers there's like this fucking bounty hunters that
fucking come along and they're like we're looking for a Harry Potter because
he's number one most wanted in the wizarding world and they come along and
they fucking smell Hermione and they fucking kidnapped them Jesus Christ and
so they take them back to Draco Malfoy's house and and his there's a bunch of
death eaters there so Bellatrix is there and Draco's parents and they're like
okay we captured Harry Potter put him in the fucking basement so the basic
they look they lock Harry and Ron in the basement and they start torturing
Hermione sounds from that are not torture sounds it sounds like they're
fucking like it sounds like Bellatrix and Hermione are fucking because you
just hear and then you hear fucking fucking belter so they literally carve
into Hermione's arm mud blood which is like a slur against like non-magical
I guess like muggle-borns oh boy and so they're fucking locked in the basement
and fucking Luna and and the fucking one guy are there yeah and they're like
Doppie comes along right he's like we're gonna save you so Doppie saves them and
Ron and Hermione or Ron and Harry go up to save Hermione and they fucking killed
Peter Pettigrew somehow which I don't even know but so so Hermione's being
tortured by Bellatrix right they go up to fucking say for my knee and Doppie
comes along and he fucking drops the chandelier on Malfoy's head but like in
the middle of all of them and so they they get away and Bellatrix is like oh
fuck this they're about to leave they're about to apparate away and Bellatrix
throws the knife at them and as they're leaving the knife goes into the little
portal and stabs the fuck in a dog yeah oh and then she doc you Doppie wake up
Doppie Doppie Doppie wake up with a knife in his chest and so yeah Doppie gets
stabbed does he die yeah he dies good he dies and Harry's like I want to bury
him without magic and that's the end of part one part one no then fucking
Voldemort finds Dumbledore's fucking wand in the fucking like oh yeah and he
screams and then shoots the sky so they're like they're like where's his
elder wand and they finally get to the bottom of it and they're like Dumbledore
had it when he died so Voldemort's like all right I'm gonna get this other wand
so he fucking literally digs up Dumbledore's grave and prized the one
from his cold dead hand and then he just goes and then shoots the sky shoots the sky
let's see in the part one but so shoot it with like lightning like yeah yeah
green lightning okay yeah but I think we forgot about the part with the
Horcrux now that comes in the second oh doesn't yeah all right well I'll see
in the part one yeah I rescind what I said about the double feature all right
we'll get to the next part last I don't know if I can do a double feature here I
know that was convoluted was gone yeah out there last two minutes
what were you doing just on Facebook oh my god yeah that was real convoluted so
before we end our 50th episode spectacular I got a P I'd like to go
over our favorite parts of the podcast like what's your oh yeah right since
Casey yeah cuz it's cut out the first time before we're talking about that so
what's your guys favorite parts of the podcast so far that we've done what was
your favorite segments what was your favorite like whatever like what was
most like your favorite part of the podcast I always liked the Kanye West
specials that was one of my favorites like when we when like Kanye was going
on a fucking meltdown and I just loved that whole saga of Kanye West that we
cover yeah I love the conspiracies dude yeah conspiracy second I like the spooky
shit yeah yeah yeah my least favorite part is Jeopardy now yeah hey Jeopardy
and my favorite moment I said before was the one time I won who wants to be a
millionaire which never has never happened that did happened that did
happen there's the one game I won yeah it's jeopardy yep jeopardy isn't very
good because I'll be I'll be in second place there's been many games up to this
point where I've been in second going into final jeopardy but I bet it all
every single time and when I get it right I'm coming up short and when I get
it wrong I got nothing I put all my luck on that last question and it doesn't
typically go my way but one of these times it will do you and I should have
got that last one I should have got it god damn but Tyler would have got it too
so I still would have lost so lost I'm just glad that Tyler Tyler went all in
because usually he's like 300 it's like fuck bro let's get a double jeopardy in
here it's fucking let's make it happen man I think Casey what are your favorite
moments in the podcast favorite moments I'd say some of the political army
arguments were very stellar especially when me and Tyler were arguing about
the insurrection yeah I love when you two argue because I end up finding
myself in the middle it's like I'll just go back and forth as soon as I get one
of you go and thinking I'm on your team somebody says something I'm like wait no
he's right yeah I mean we got that you know what heartfelt thank you to anybody
who actually listens to this and to fuck you if you haven't told me no two of our
listeners out there yeah thank you so much for your participation in this
abortion like fucking Germany or some shit what probably Ukraine we got a big
Ukraine fan base I like it yeah this album is dedicated like to bring down
one back to a podcast
yeah I'm trying to find that one game which game I've been looking for lately
I've been looking for that game for PlayStation 1 where maybe uh we would like to thank Don Juan for being a member of the podcast
yeah yeah thanks for having me on I love when you guys call me for who asked me to be a billionaire and I get the right answer I love that shit
Don Juan is definitely the fifth member of the podcast
Don Juan 50 episodes
yeah that's it I don't think they should allow two episodes though
God you're a superstar
What do you think about getting up to 50 episodes? What's your favorite segment?
50 episodes my favorite segment I think is uh
I don't know I can't decide
I like when I get the call game stopped
That's my favorite
That's fucking nuts
That's my favorite shit though
Don Juan popping bottles
Don fucking Juan Don you've helped me out on a lot of those millionaire games
You know I know a little bit about some things and I know a lot about a lot of other things that
You've never led me astray I figured at least one of these times you would have fucked me over
I just been trying to spend a lot of money on the Brooklyn way though
You know what I'm saying
Well said Don
I think I'm just going to make a phone call real quick
Yeah dude alright who are we calling for episode 50?
I'm going to call GameStop and Hallelooly
What time is it in Hallelooly right now?
I don't know what time it is in Hallelooly
It's like 7
Get ahead and start out with early holiday shopping with up to 30% trading credit towards your reservation or purchase of this season's hottest title
Like a thousand and three drawings
You're on Spyro
I'm trying to find that game
Visit GameStop.com or download the GameStop app
Doesn't this shit charge you like four times every time you do it?
Damn I don't be knowing nothing about that Obama phone though
No got you
Damn come on
Damn I be looking for tech and three though
I've been looking for tech and three
What game they got to slug the hedgehog off though?
I'm thinking about upgrading to a Dreamcast from a Playstation one
They got a Sega Genesis? You ever see that shit though?
Damn yeah I love it, I be loving that shit
They got to slug the hedgehog and their fucking tails
Knuckles
Damn yeah you got the knuckles you ever see that shit though?
So is this employee just not picking up the phone?
Damn I think that might have been the part of Hawaii that burned to the ground though
Oh shit
They just got you caller ID'd as like prank callers or some shit
Damn yeah they all know about that
No one in Honolulu is safe tonight
GameStop, Honolulu, Hawaii
It's not just because of the fucking roaring fires
Damn pick up the phone though
There's fires in Hawaii? I didn't know about that
There's fires in Hawaii?
Yeah bro
I didn't hear about that
I could have sworn you were making me second guess myself now
Super Mario Wonder, Spider-Man 2, and Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3
To speak to an associate press 1 now or to check out our other promotions visit GameStop.com or download the GameStop app
Damn bro this is crazy I've been looking for this one game though
Damn my time is up for Hawaii though
I was calling
Thanks for calling GameStop at Camp Shopping Center this is Andrew I'm gonna help you
Damn I gotta I've been looking for this game dude I was wondering if you might know about this game
It's called Cool Borders though you ever play that game?
I can't say I have
Yeah you like this dude on a snowboard dude and you be trying to get to the bottom of the mountain before everybody else does
But you gotta do like man trucks and shit while you're coming down the mountain
You never played that game though?
Nah I've played like Skate it's probably the closest thing I can think of
Tony Hawk's Skate
Yeah
Damn yeah I be playing that shit I love that game though
But I be looking for this one called Cool Borders dude it's for PlayStation 1 you got PlayStation 1 games?
Um no we have PlayStation 3 that's the latest we go
Damn bro you don't got no Tekken 3 though?
Probably not I mean I know Best Buy has some old Tekken games
Yeah you remember what's his name Yoshi Mitsuda?
You remember that dude?
A while ago yeah
Yeah you know what I'm talking about dude that shit was crazy dude
I be missing PlayStation 1 dude nobody really likes that shit no more
But damn I don't wanna bother you too much dude
But uh damn you got any Sonic the Hedgehog games though?
Oh yeah we have a few new ones I think the newest one is Frontiers
Damn what you got that on though?
PS4 PS5
Damn I gotta upgrade that I be living on the income based shit so damn I ain't got money for that but you know maybe soon I be getting on that shit though
Yeah I recommend it
Damn alright so what was your name Mason?
Andrew
Oh Andrew alright I appreciate your help thank you
No worries have a good one
Who's that Mason the Booze?
Damn no one's your name Mason?
Shout out to Mason the Booze man
If you're a GameStop employee in Honolulu Hawaii and we've ever bothered you we apologize
Oh shit
That guy sounded like he knew who I was
Yeah
He's like I've heard of this guy always calls about PlayStation 1 games with a caller ID from New York
What I missed
Nothing special dude
No
No I just heard him asking about the shittiest PlayStation 1 games ever made
Cool Borders
Have you ever heard of that game?
No
What game are you talking about?
Cool Borders
Yeah dude it's a skateboard game
It's like the shittiest game ever made
Yeah I used to play Tony Hawk I used to play downhill demolition where you fucking ride down the hills and punch people off the bikes
Oh shit
Damn
You should call NASA about a movie
Tony Hawk underground
Nah you gotta call Mason the Movie Man for that shit
Yeah what movie should we ask about next time?
Fucking Call of Duty Cold War
The movie
Harry Potter bro
The Barbie movie
Yeah that's not out yet
It's gonna be some classic where I can describe it really like arduously
Die Hard
That's a Christmas one
You can do Die Hard, fucking Pulp Fiction
I just love when they get it from like really vague descriptions
Yeah Pulp Fiction would be a good one
Cause if you talk about some shit that's later in Pulp Fiction I feel like a lot of people forget most of that
Damn that black dude got that suitcase there and he opens that shit up and you know
The fucking black latex shit and he was talking about fucking each other's ass and shit it was wow
What part is that?
The fucking part where they uh the fucking Marcellus Wallace and fucking Bruce Willis' character get into a fight and they like go into the one gun
Bruce Willis goes into the one gun store and he gets put at fucking gunpoint
I guess I've only seen parts of that movie
Cause then Marcellus Wallace gets fucked in the ass by this weird gay couple
And then they're about to do it to Bruce and Bruce fucking shoots him
What does Marcellus Wallace look like?
Damn I've been looking for this one movie to where there's this like
There's like these two dumb dudes who they like once got brown hair once got yellow hair
Once got like a blue suit on dude another guy got an orange suit
Does he drive around in a dog?
They look like a dog but they actually hit the owl with the white cork
Hey Don what's our email?
It's a title podcast 72 and gmail. 73 dude
Yeah that's what I said
Damn I got the right name
What is 70?
Alright well thanks for listening to the 50th episode
Check out our Ghost hunting adventures on YouTube
I'm sorry you lost IQ points listening to this
Yeah this has been a fucking stimulant fueled episode
How long of an episode is this?
Two hours
Fucking way bro we've been here for at least five
I got here a fucking
Two hours?
Well you were fixing your bob, bobby biller
The Harry Potter part felt like two hours
Jeopardy felt like at least 45 minutes
That is been two hours
He also kept on cutting out our fucking 20 minute long conversations
That is true
Oh thanks for listening
Sleep and girl com be a man
Don't sleep and girl com be a human
Stick around for episode 100
Yeah
Might be a while but
From Japan
It depends if you guys start listening and getting us money we can actually go there
Until then keep not listening
Alright until then be kind to yourselves
And each other
We out
Fuck off
For all we know robots have souls we just don't know if they do or don't
How do you know?
Have you ever been a cyborg or a robot?
You think we were the first ones to inhabit this planet?
Fuck it up
No no we are jumping down this fucking rabbit hole
Yes we are
There's people out there with some really dumb thoughts
Extended episodes
Where the fuck did this pyramid come from?
Where the fuck did Stonehenge come from?
You're telling me that they didn't die and become ghosts?
They're killing all already born babies and selling them to the Chinese
Aliens exist
Somewhere in China
In some base
What the fuck
There are super soldiers that are at least 9 or 10 feet tall
Anthropocasauri
They have dread
Most super soldiers
Then they are extraterrestrials
They are aliens
I do not negotiate with them
We gotta go to the fucking moon
Because fucking JFK got assassinated by the fucking government
He got killed by the CIA
JFK was killed by the government
Before my eyes while holding their pulse feel them die of this virus
You feel bump bump bump
Nothing
They're fucking gone
I've seen it happen
I think that the government has taken it to the next level with the birds
They know what birds are going to cross paths with you
That you are going to be able to raise
And they are going to make them so fucking real
They're going to sink money into them
Because they know that if you put that motherfucker in a cage
They're going to be able to convince you that thing is fucking real
You can cut it open
You're going to see blood cuts
No circuitry
But let me tell you their technology
Is absolutely vile
Which by the way big brother
Is the overlord
We're only living in the third dimension
George Soros is an actual Nazi collaborator
Okay
I'm not fucking lying
It's fucking real
Okay
Look it up
He says that he was doing this shit
George Soros actually worked with the fucking Nazis during the Holm
He says that he was doing it just to survive
But he fucking loved it
He was having a great fucking time doing this shit
George Soros is the fucking devil
Okay
He's not fucking doing this shit
George Soros is fucking evil
He's the actual fucking leader for all this shit
He's fucking put down a whole bunch of shit
Just don't fucking get it
Everybody likes Donald Trump
Donald Trump is the fucking word person out there
Love Trump right
Love Trump
He's not the actual fucking leader
It's George Soros
It's Bill Gates
It's fucking Elon Musk
It's everyone out there
Everybody's got Trump
It's fucking Elon Musk
Everybody's got Trump
You see
Elon Musk is so cool
He made a place for all of us
The actual government is trying
The actual full government
Which is George Soros and all these fucking Nazis
Are actually the ones that are trying to fucking all of us
The clear politicians are paid off by the fucking billionaires
He's fucking off