1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,600 Good morning, everyone. 2 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:03,600 Good morning. 3 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:08,160 It's good to see you all today. 4 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:11,480 Who feels like it's been a busy fall so far? 5 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:14,360 Can you relate? 6 00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:16,120 That's me. 7 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:21,920 So coming at you live this morning from a busy fall. 8 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:28,360 One of the things I love about getting to be together is just what this body does for 9 00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:32,120 me because each of you show up. 10 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:39,720 It's a joyful thing to come together and be a community together and see faces that from 11 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:43,480 the range of conversations we've had, sometimes it's just in quick passing and sometimes it's 12 00:00:43,480 --> 00:00:44,480 pretty in depth. 13 00:00:44,480 --> 00:00:49,580 But everybody who is here, somebody else is glad that you're here. 14 00:00:49,580 --> 00:00:52,480 So I want to just make sure that you hear that also from me. 15 00:00:52,480 --> 00:00:57,160 I'm so glad you're here because I feel boosted from you guys. 16 00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:03,720 So thank you for how you build into this community and what God is doing. 17 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:09,680 This week is one of the weeks that we've been in a series called Fully. 18 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:15,720 And each week we've been doing focus on a word that ends in fully. 19 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:18,720 So Scott preached on joyfully. 20 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:20,840 There's going to be a number more coming up this week. 21 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:24,200 I'm speaking on forgetfully. 22 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:29,200 And it is essentially a message on forgiveness. 23 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:35,600 I want to say at the very top that I know that this is a fairly triggering topic for 24 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,000 people, for some people. 25 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:44,920 This can be triggering thing for some of you as you have experienced forgiveness as an 26 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:50,320 idea that's been weaponized and held as a tool of guilt over your heads. 27 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:56,400 And in regard to some of those most terrible and traumatic things, the words I say today 28 00:01:56,400 --> 00:02:00,220 will be about forgiveness and even forgetting offenses to a degree. 29 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:05,160 But I want to be clear that what you do with these words and the timeline with which you 30 00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:10,480 do them are entirely yours and between you and the Lord and not my business. 31 00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:14,440 And so I want to put that out there. 32 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:20,920 I know that forgiveness can be a scary topic for people for a lot of reasons and today 33 00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:26,320 is not meant to be, is not meant to weaponize that towards you. 34 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:30,080 So I want to be verbal about that. 35 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:36,720 What I do hope our time together is today about is the between you and you're the Lord 36 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:39,840 communication portion, that experience. 37 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:49,040 I am hopeful that that will continue to be or become a life giving and freeing and regularly 38 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:53,460 integrated parts for you. 39 00:02:53,460 --> 00:03:02,080 In scripture, forgiveness is a central thread that runs through all of the passages in each 40 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:04,840 book from the first to the last. 41 00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:10,160 Even though the central idea of this message is indeed forgiveness, it's really probably 42 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:17,120 core more about self reflection, which is why you had the question that you had today. 43 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:22,360 And so I want to talk about first that God forgives us. 44 00:03:22,360 --> 00:03:28,560 That is where we have to begin is looking to the Lord and recognizing that that is offered 45 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:29,840 to you. 46 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:35,400 Much like how we talk about rest here at the house, though, we have misordered things. 47 00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:36,400 Rest is not earned. 48 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:37,440 It is a gift given. 49 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:39,360 That's how we talk about rest here. 50 00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:40,760 And so it's the same with forgiveness. 51 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:42,760 We don't earn it because we can't. 52 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:47,960 It has already been offered to you as a gift, not for the snatching, but for the receiving 53 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:51,340 and the welcoming of it in our lives. 54 00:03:51,340 --> 00:03:55,000 First John 4 19 says we love because God first loved us. 55 00:03:55,000 --> 00:04:01,560 And this verse sets the tone for God's action towards us always. 56 00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:04,000 That God moves first. 57 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:09,480 We would not have been able to know how high or how wide or how deep the love of God could 58 00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:14,680 go without it being revealed to us and already being in action towards us. 59 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:18,640 We might have figured out fractions of it. 60 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:25,320 Some of you may be familiar with from your philosophy classes or history classes, the 61 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:31,320 philosopher Plato and his idea of the cave. 62 00:04:31,320 --> 00:04:36,080 And the idea of the cave is that all the people in the cave are facing the wall and all they 63 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:41,880 can see is the shadows of light, you know, pushing their shadows on the wall. 64 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:45,600 But it's dim, it's shadowed, it's veiled. 65 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:51,040 And they need somebody to lead them out of the cave to see what life is really like. 66 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:54,680 That's the idea of the cave in Plato's imagery. 67 00:04:54,680 --> 00:05:00,260 And Plato often said that truth is what is outside the cave. 68 00:05:00,260 --> 00:05:01,520 That's what you need to be led to. 69 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:08,960 But scripture unsurprisingly builds on this costume, builds on this concept because it 70 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:15,760 is in a Greek world and goes on to use these ideas in scripture saying, for now we see 71 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:20,160 only a reflection as in a mirror, but then we shall see face to face. 72 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,240 Now I know in part. 73 00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:29,800 But that we look to God to lead us to things that are real and to things that are true. 74 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:34,120 And so it indicates that unless God leads us out of the cave, unless God leads us into 75 00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:39,560 truth, unless God leads us into love, God leads us into these things such as forgiveness 76 00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:43,880 that I'm talking about today, we cannot truly know. 77 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:47,040 But I'm thankful that God faithfully does that. 78 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:49,400 And this is how everything in life goes, is it not? 79 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:53,120 We are offered the model, we learn it, and then we share it. 80 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:54,220 That's how we do things. 81 00:05:54,220 --> 00:05:55,220 We watch it happen. 82 00:05:55,220 --> 00:06:00,720 We are led in it first, then we do it ourselves, and then we share it. 83 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:04,880 And so we understand that God has led the way as with just about anything, we recognize 84 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:11,520 that God has reached out to us, offering us something to respond to. 85 00:06:11,520 --> 00:06:16,680 And in this case, it is that God has forgiven us and has offered it to us first. 86 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,880 He does not withhold it from us. 87 00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:20,760 He does not make us earn it. 88 00:06:20,760 --> 00:06:22,960 It is ours to have. 89 00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:28,220 And so Luke 23, 34 says, Jesus said, Father, forgive them for they do not know what they 90 00:06:28,220 --> 00:06:29,800 are doing. 91 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:36,080 Matthew 26, 27 and 28, when he's sitting with his friends, we reflect on this concept every 92 00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:40,680 week here at the house with the communion. 93 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,920 He's sitting with his friends and it says, then he took the cup and when he had given 94 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:47,940 thanks, he gave it to them saying, drink from it, all of you. 95 00:06:47,940 --> 00:06:53,760 This is the blood of the covenant, which is poured out for the many, poured out for many 96 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,540 for the forgiveness of sins. 97 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:57,960 The action had come first. 98 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:05,800 And so one thing that we need to keep in mind is that Jesus advocates for our wholeness always 99 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:10,380 before we even ever know we're broken. 100 00:07:10,380 --> 00:07:16,140 And so recognizing that forgiveness has been offered, you do not have to earn it. 101 00:07:16,140 --> 00:07:19,680 It is not something you have to fight for from God. 102 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:23,880 We recognize that God has forgiven us and we accept it with an open heart. 103 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:31,540 But second part is a little hard because we are a people that can hang on to wrongs. 104 00:07:31,540 --> 00:07:33,180 We do it towards others. 105 00:07:33,180 --> 00:07:38,640 We build tally lists, but most specifically, we do it to ourselves. 106 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:43,840 I think we are the least gracious to ourselves, never letting ourselves off the hook. 107 00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:49,480 We let our own mistakes, missteps and often and offenses stick to us and build up in our 108 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:55,840 own minds until we often see ourselves as our offenses and our wrongs. 109 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:59,400 It's often accompanied by defeating words such as, you're so stupid, why did you do 110 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:00,400 that again? 111 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,680 Again, how could you do that? 112 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:06,080 I can't believe that you, why can't you just? 113 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:11,280 And so we do this weird thing by hanging on to our self offenses or even our outwardly 114 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,120 facing offenses. 115 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:17,720 And it's as if we want people to know that we are already managing our self punishment. 116 00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:18,720 I'm an idiot. 117 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:19,720 I know it. 118 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:20,720 You don't have to tell me. 119 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:22,560 I'll never forgive myself for this. 120 00:08:22,560 --> 00:08:29,160 We get into this really stuck place, putting all of this as a barrier between ourselves 121 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:36,160 as though we don't deserve to be let go, that we don't deserve to be off the hook on that. 122 00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:41,960 Or perhaps we go the other way where we dismiss our offenses and we put it on the other person 123 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:46,160 for being, you're too sensitive or you're making a big deal out of something that isn't. 124 00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,960 I don't know what the problem is. 125 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:54,200 Or if we decide, or we decide that whatever really was, wasn't actually that bad and everyone 126 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,920 should just move on. 127 00:08:55,920 --> 00:09:02,200 And we decide for others that they should just move on from our offenses. 128 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,240 Everyone says and does things like that. 129 00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:05,840 Why should it be such a big deal? 130 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:09,080 I don't think you're looking at this correctly. 131 00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:11,380 Have we ever said stuff like that? 132 00:09:11,380 --> 00:09:14,960 Have we ever been in both of these categories? 133 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:20,560 Both are unhealthy because both are avoidant. 134 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:26,560 Both lead us away from self-examination, repentance and resolution. 135 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:28,340 Why do we need forgiveness? 136 00:09:28,340 --> 00:09:30,480 Because we do these things. 137 00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:32,640 We do them to ourselves and we do them to others. 138 00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:37,520 Is it a surprise to any of us that we've hurt each other? 139 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:42,520 And is it a surprise to any of us that we've hurt ourselves in our body and our minds and 140 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:44,640 our souls and our hearts? 141 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:50,640 By our actions, by our words, by what we have not said and done towards others and what 142 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,240 we have done towards ourselves and others. 143 00:09:53,240 --> 00:09:58,680 In doing these things, we have brought hurt and offense not to ourselves and others, but 144 00:09:58,680 --> 00:10:03,600 to our loving creator. 145 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:08,320 If we come to terms with this, then it seems odd, though not surprising knowing what we 146 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:13,580 know of humanity, that we would be dismissive and avoidant of forgiveness that's already 147 00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:16,080 been offered to you. 148 00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:21,600 We are not in the practice of thinking we need it because we avoid it. 149 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:28,120 And this will stop us dead in our tracks because friends, we always need it. 150 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:32,920 We always need God's wholeness and restoration. 151 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,680 That's what forgiveness leads us to. 152 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,960 And so I want to practice something. 153 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:39,360 We're going to do this twice. 154 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,280 Liam, this will be the prayer of confession. 155 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:49,040 We're going to do this twice, but I will ask you a question between both recitings. 156 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:52,600 So up on the screen will be something called the prayer of confession. 157 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:59,040 You are already well in the practice of praying things that are more like recitations, but 158 00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:03,080 I invite you to join me in this. 159 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:10,600 Almighty God, we acknowledge and confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word, 160 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:11,840 and deed. 161 00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:18,320 We have not loved you with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. 162 00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:22,000 We have not loved our neighbor as ourselves. 163 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:30,120 Deep in within us, our sorrow for the wrong we have done and the good we have left undone. 164 00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:35,480 So I'm going to ask you not to say out loud, but to consider how did that feel? 165 00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:38,320 What did that make you think? 166 00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:39,840 Did you think, this is a weird prayer. 167 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,200 Why am I praying this right now? 168 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:48,520 Or did you think, oh, if I really considered what these words are, I could be here a minute. 169 00:11:48,520 --> 00:11:51,060 I don't want to think about that right now. 170 00:11:51,060 --> 00:11:52,280 So we're going to pray it again. 171 00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:58,080 We're going to say it again, and I want you to be aware of what you're thinking and feeling 172 00:11:58,080 --> 00:12:01,160 as we say it. 173 00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:09,820 So once again we say, Almighty God, we acknowledge and confess that we have sinned against you 174 00:12:09,820 --> 00:12:13,320 in thought, word, and deed. 175 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:19,920 We have not loved you with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength. 176 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:23,520 We have not loved our neighbor as ourselves. 177 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:32,160 Deep in within us, our sorrow for the wrong we have done and the good we have left undone. 178 00:12:32,160 --> 00:12:38,080 So this is where we're going to take a little side trail to talk about self-reflection or 179 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:40,600 self-examination. 180 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:47,560 There is a wonderful spiritual practice called an examine that was created by Ignatius of 181 00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:51,240 Loyola, a Spanish priest from the 1500s. 182 00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:59,880 And he created a daily practice in which you go through, we'll do them as questions, you'll 183 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:04,500 see them as questions or as statements, but they are reflections. 184 00:13:04,500 --> 00:13:09,900 We'll go through these reflections and it's an opportunity to consider things. 185 00:13:09,900 --> 00:13:14,080 For now, Liam is going to put them up on the screen and he'll just move through them. 186 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:19,320 We will have a time available at the end to actually think about them. 187 00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:25,200 But for this, Liam this will be the next screen, I think there's just, yep, that. 188 00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:29,360 These are some of the questions that the daily examine guides you through. 189 00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:35,200 You place yourself in God's presence and you give thanks for God's great love for you. 190 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:40,320 The second thing you do after you think through is pray for the grace to understand how God 191 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,240 is acting in your life. 192 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:45,140 And then you review your day. 193 00:13:45,140 --> 00:13:51,080 You recall specific moments and your feelings at the time. 194 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:56,760 You reflect on what you said and did or thought in those instances. 195 00:13:56,760 --> 00:14:02,160 Were you drawing closer to God or were you drawing yourself further away? 196 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:06,400 And then you look towards the next day and you think about how you might collaborate 197 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:12,100 more effectively with God's plan. 198 00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:18,740 And as you go through those as a way of practicing reflection and self-examination, it's a guide 199 00:14:18,740 --> 00:14:24,620 that offers God space to speak with you and for you to speak with God. 200 00:14:24,620 --> 00:14:26,880 What have I done against my neighbor? 201 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:30,720 What have I said that I wasn't aware of? 202 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,280 Did I hurt myself or others? 203 00:14:33,280 --> 00:14:36,400 Did I cause offense? 204 00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:41,180 And it allows you some space to reflect on those things. 205 00:14:41,180 --> 00:14:45,580 Within this practice, thank you Liam, within this practice is space for God to reveal to 206 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:52,200 you where you might have brought wrong or offense in your world, around you with the 207 00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,560 people you know. 208 00:14:54,560 --> 00:15:02,080 Without a practice of self-examination, we become avoidant of face-to-face time with 209 00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,520 God. 210 00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:10,800 We become avoidant because for the very thing that we've been talking about, we assume God's 211 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:15,180 judgment before we assume God's love and forgiveness. 212 00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:23,440 We assume that coming face-to-face with God is going to be condemnation, not the joy that 213 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:28,640 he has for spending time with us, not the love that he has offered, not the forgiveness 214 00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:31,960 that is already yours. 215 00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:38,240 We assume the bad before we assume the good. 216 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:43,320 And it's this very thing that puts a dam in the river, in not just in our spiritual lives, 217 00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:46,760 but in our lives in general with others. 218 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:50,200 We have assumed God is quicker to judge us than God is to forgive us. 219 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:55,560 And so we choose avoidance and then we treat others the same way. 220 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:59,640 We are quicker to judge than we are to forgive. 221 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:15,120 So take a moment to self-reflect right now and ask yourself if this is true of you. 222 00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:22,040 We move zero steps forward when we either hang on to or dismiss the life-giving forgiveness 223 00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:25,740 that has been offered fully to us. 224 00:16:25,740 --> 00:16:30,200 When we practice this kind of forgiveness, we are then able to freely extend it to others. 225 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:37,640 And let me be clear, I did not say easily, but we will learn with a regular practice 226 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:51,000 how to be wise and generous and not withholding with our forgiveness to others. 227 00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:54,160 So ultimately, we follow God's lead. 228 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:56,520 He extends to us first. 229 00:16:56,520 --> 00:17:02,360 We say yes with a whole heart, with a reflective and self-examined heart. 230 00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:08,400 And then we are freed up to share with others. 231 00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:13,640 And so I want to read through a passage and I want to take a posture of full attention. 232 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:16,400 I will invite you to stand as you are able. 233 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:19,920 We're going to read through Matthew 18, 21 through 33. 234 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:25,240 We have a practice at the house of turning our full attention to the scriptures. 235 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:28,080 And so if you would like to turn to Matthew 18, you may. 236 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,240 We have Bibles in the hall as well. 237 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:33,600 If you don't have one, you can also pull it up on your phone. 238 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:43,840 Matthew 18, 21 through 33 is the parable of the unmerciful servant. 239 00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:48,620 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother 240 00:17:48,620 --> 00:17:50,800 or sister who sins against me? 241 00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:52,960 Up to seven times? 242 00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:58,240 And Jesus answered, I tell you, not seven times, but 77 times. 243 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:02,080 This indicated basically stop counting. 244 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,720 Don't count. 245 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:09,480 Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his 246 00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:10,480 servants. 247 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:14,640 And as he began the settlement, a man who owned him 10,000 bags of gold was brought 248 00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:16,000 to him. 249 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:19,960 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and 250 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:23,000 all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 251 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,160 At this, the servant fell on his knees before him. 252 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:28,600 Be patient with me, he begged, and I will pay back everything. 253 00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:34,000 The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt, and let him go. 254 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,040 Wow. 255 00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:40,240 But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him 100 silver 256 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:41,240 coins. 257 00:18:41,240 --> 00:18:42,880 He grabbed him and began to choke him. 258 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:45,760 Pay back what you owe me, he demanded. 259 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:49,160 His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, be patient with me, and I will pay it 260 00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:50,420 back. 261 00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:51,720 But he refused. 262 00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:56,840 Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 263 00:18:56,840 --> 00:19:00,160 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their 264 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,120 master everything that had happened. 265 00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,960 Then the master called the servant in. 266 00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:07,280 You wicked servant, he said. 267 00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:11,760 I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 268 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:16,140 Shouldn't you have mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you? 269 00:19:16,140 --> 00:19:19,200 I'm going to jump to Colossians 3, 12 through 14. 270 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:25,560 Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion, 271 00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:29,680 kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 272 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:36,320 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. 273 00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:39,160 Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 274 00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:45,240 And over all these virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. 275 00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:48,240 You may be seated. 276 00:19:48,240 --> 00:20:00,360 It is so clear in this message, in this scripture, what God's heart is. 277 00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:02,720 It's so clear. 278 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:06,400 There are no games played on this one. 279 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:10,400 You can't misinterpret this. 280 00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:12,160 The servant was offered forgiveness. 281 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:18,480 We can see that it is absolutely insane that he demanded, that same servant demanded he 282 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:19,920 be owed. 283 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:23,960 And when the person couldn't pay him, he put him in jail. 284 00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:32,080 He was unkind, unmerciful, unforgiving when he had just received that. 285 00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:35,240 That seems shocking to us, doesn't it? 286 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:41,280 And yet, and yet, that's a hard one in our lives. 287 00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:48,200 What's even harder is that scripture tells us certain things about what God does with 288 00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:51,000 our offenses. 289 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:59,520 Isaiah 43, 25 says, I, even I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake and 290 00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:03,280 remembers your sins no more. 291 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:07,560 Hebrews 8, 12 says, for I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no 292 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:08,560 more. 293 00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:16,600 Micah 7, 18, and 19, who is a God like you who pardons sin and forgives the transgression 294 00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,240 of the remnants of his inheritance? 295 00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:23,480 You do not stay angry forever, but delight to show mercy. 296 00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,120 You will again have compassion on us. 297 00:21:25,120 --> 00:21:30,440 You will tread out our, or you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities 298 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:34,120 into the depth of the sea. 299 00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:40,640 What can be wilder than believing that God has offered us forgiveness is not something 300 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:43,920 to work for, but is something that is really given to you. 301 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:49,480 What can be wilder to consider is that God does not hold our sins against us. 302 00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:57,040 What can be wilder to consider is that God forgets them in that he does not look at us 303 00:21:57,040 --> 00:22:00,660 and see our offenses. 304 00:22:00,660 --> 00:22:04,480 So forgetfully is how this message has been titled within this series, though all the 305 00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:10,400 things I've mentioned, that's probably going to be the thing that we wrestle with the most. 306 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:14,520 Because as I said, we are people that know how to hang on to wrongs. 307 00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:17,880 We even do it sometimes as a badge of honor, don't we? 308 00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:21,560 We feel like something's been snatched away from us when we've been wronged. 309 00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:26,960 Our dignity, our status, how people view us, our integrity, our trustworthiness, something 310 00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,140 precious deep within us. 311 00:22:29,140 --> 00:22:34,040 We can tend to want to dismiss the pain, but we often don't want to do the hard work that 312 00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:41,720 comes with it, of actually dealing with the thing that has happened. 313 00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:42,980 That's not an indictment. 314 00:22:42,980 --> 00:22:45,180 We just don't respond to pain well. 315 00:22:45,180 --> 00:22:46,840 We usually just want to numb it. 316 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:50,720 That's what we're in the practice of, to get rid of it. 317 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:55,760 But often we don't want to forget when someone else has done something to us. 318 00:22:55,760 --> 00:23:02,080 We want to remember the things, but we don't want the complications that come with it. 319 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:06,600 We want others to know the wrongs that have been done to us, or the wrongs that have been 320 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:12,480 done, and we want them to join our side and agree that it was terrible. 321 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:20,200 And usually, not always, but usually, this is an outcome of not examining what's at the 322 00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:25,880 core of the pain and the hurt that was caused by the thing, by the offense. 323 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:31,800 Self-examination is an incredibly important tool to have in your life arsenal. 324 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:35,080 Asking yourself, why did that bother me so much? 325 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:40,560 It's a great question to keep on hand. 326 00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:45,280 For better or for worse, it's actually for better, though we may hate it, we see in Scripture 327 00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:51,040 that God not only leads us in loving and forgiving others, but in not keeping the offense ever 328 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,320 in our view. 329 00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:58,440 That does not mean that everything goes back to normal. 330 00:23:58,440 --> 00:24:02,700 That's not what that means. 331 00:24:02,700 --> 00:24:07,840 It's hard because we know some of the offenses that have existed on this planet. 332 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:10,880 It feels, at its worst, like we're letting people get away with things, but there's a 333 00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:12,200 process to it. 334 00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:14,840 It's not just simple, right? 335 00:24:14,840 --> 00:24:19,760 For forgiveness to be fully realized, we have to come to a place of recognition and reception 336 00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:25,560 of what this gift of forgiveness looks like to us, and to really experience at a deep 337 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:27,040 level. 338 00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:31,200 It's not flipping, it's not loose, and it's not sweeping things under the rug. 339 00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:39,040 It's not what you often hear in childhood experience. 340 00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,120 Tell them you're sorry. 341 00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:44,560 Tell them it's okay, right? 342 00:24:44,560 --> 00:24:49,400 We've all instructed kids to say, tell them you're sorry, and what is the response back? 343 00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,500 It's okay. 344 00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:53,660 It's not okay. 345 00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:59,760 What I often will say to a kid is, you can apologize if you'd like. 346 00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:05,040 You can say I forgive you, or you can say thank you, but you don't have to. 347 00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:13,740 Truthfully, we're not forcing people into that action, but it is not okay, right? 348 00:25:13,740 --> 00:25:17,280 We don't want to get into the practice of being like, it's okay, because that just, 349 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:20,320 again, that's the avoidant dismissive thing. 350 00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:21,880 God is not dismissing things. 351 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,880 God is not about that. 352 00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:26,040 God does deal with things directly. 353 00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:28,160 We have seen evidence of that. 354 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:33,160 You should rest assured, be rest assured, that when we're talking about, when Scripture 355 00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:41,040 is talking about God is sending these offenses into the sea, he's not dismissing them. 356 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:49,120 He is dealing with them, but he's letting us off the hook of managing that. 357 00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:55,640 There's plenty of other things we are carrying with us throughout this life. 358 00:25:55,640 --> 00:26:00,260 God is not dismissing things, nor do I believe God is asking us to dismiss things either. 359 00:26:00,260 --> 00:26:04,440 That is not in God's character, particularly when we consider the depth of God's love for 360 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:10,200 us and for others, and that God's objective for us is always restoration to wholeness 361 00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:11,820 in ourselves. 362 00:26:11,820 --> 00:26:13,720 God is not dismissive or avoidant. 363 00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:19,000 God is asking us to be gracious and merciful just as God has been with us, but it is not 364 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:21,320 just a, that's okay. 365 00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:22,920 There's a process involved. 366 00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:24,880 There's self-reflection involved. 367 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:31,860 It's not quick, but do not hold things against yourself or others. 368 00:26:31,860 --> 00:26:36,240 God wants us to be free. 369 00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:40,120 And so once again, we see in these scriptures that I just read that God leads us in mercy 370 00:26:40,120 --> 00:26:45,000 and loving kindness, and that is something that we also need to practice. 371 00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:49,660 And just as the servant was forgiven his debts, it was put upon the servant to share mercy 372 00:26:49,660 --> 00:26:55,200 and forgive as he'd been forgiven, to no longer hold the debt over the owner, or the 373 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:58,320 ower, excuse me. 374 00:26:58,320 --> 00:27:02,000 And I want to say, I think this is largely so that we ourselves don't get into a practice 375 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:09,360 of oppression, because when you choose to hold offenses over somebody, it's because 376 00:27:09,360 --> 00:27:13,880 you want to regain the power that you feel like was taken from you. 377 00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:15,140 You want to hold it over them. 378 00:27:15,140 --> 00:27:17,680 You don't want to restore equity. 379 00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:19,320 That's often the case. 380 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:26,360 And what you're looking at is actually becoming the oppressor in this situation, because consider 381 00:27:26,360 --> 00:27:35,200 the servant who refused to accept the plea of the one who owed him silver. 382 00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:37,960 He became the oppressor. 383 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:47,000 And I think when we are unmerciful and unforgiving, that's the danger we can fall into. 384 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:52,020 We do not need more of that in our world. 385 00:27:52,020 --> 00:27:56,040 So someone who doesn't practice forgiveness, who thinks that they don't need it, will not 386 00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:58,880 be able to practice mercy and grace and forgiveness towards others. 387 00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:00,960 They will not be able to do it. 388 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:01,960 Their heart is not soft. 389 00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:04,600 They are not teachable. 390 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:09,240 I've heard people talk about their forgiveness towards others as almost, don't cross me, 391 00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:11,880 you'll regret it. 392 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:18,240 And speak of the retribution that they'll enact, or how they'll make life for somebody. 393 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:22,400 That's oppressor language. 394 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:26,720 They want to treat somebody the way they feel that they were treated or wronged, as almost 395 00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:27,720 a point of pride. 396 00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:29,680 This is not a virtue. 397 00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:30,680 This is not admirable. 398 00:28:30,680 --> 00:28:32,760 It is a play for power. 399 00:28:32,760 --> 00:28:38,400 And we need so much less of that in our world. 400 00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:42,920 Forgiveness is something that is entirely your choice. 401 00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:47,200 Whether or not you participate in it, you are empowered to make those decisions on your 402 00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:48,200 own. 403 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:54,160 And that's one of what happens when we don't have a practice of forgiveness in our lives. 404 00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:56,920 Energy is taken from you. 405 00:28:56,920 --> 00:29:01,520 It takes a lot of energy to hold and maintain offenses. 406 00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:05,440 As I said earlier, forgiveness is not always easy and sometimes an offense is incredibly 407 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:06,440 big. 408 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:12,360 And I said at the very beginning, I want to point out this is not meant to be a message 409 00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:19,080 about shame or weaponizing forgiveness. 410 00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:22,600 These are your things to handle as you wish. 411 00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:27,080 But there are things attached to it. 412 00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:30,760 Forgiveness is not something that someone can or should be forced into, but it will 413 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:33,280 take time and energy away from you. 414 00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:40,520 It does not build something good in us when we withhold forgiveness or hold onto our offenses. 415 00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:45,920 It takes something away from us and it keeps us stuck in a place that we will probably 416 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:48,320 hate. 417 00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:52,240 And also, you are not letting people off the hook. 418 00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,120 When you forgive somebody, that's not what you're doing. 419 00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:57,980 You are releasing yourself from carrying the weight of the thing. 420 00:29:57,980 --> 00:29:59,860 The other party is responsible for themselves. 421 00:29:59,860 --> 00:30:02,960 If you've ever been to therapy and you've talked through things that involve other people, 422 00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:08,240 the therapist or counselor has probably said something to you like, you cannot change the 423 00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:10,560 other person. 424 00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:17,040 The only thing you can change is your own response. 425 00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:20,920 And again, a reminder, you do not earn God's forgiveness and that goes for your neighbor 426 00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:25,540 too, so don't make them earn it. 427 00:30:25,540 --> 00:30:30,540 And that might make you mad because you might want them to squirm and feel awful about things 428 00:30:30,540 --> 00:30:33,040 you find deplorable. 429 00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:36,620 God has offered forgiveness to us. 430 00:30:36,620 --> 00:30:38,760 We simply need to receive it with an open heart. 431 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:43,120 However, it is our world's lack of walking in the freedom of forgiveness that often keeps 432 00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:48,720 us so wound up in our systematic patterns of hurting each other and ourselves. 433 00:30:48,720 --> 00:30:55,440 So putting a practice of forgiveness in the world through ourselves might be recommendable. 434 00:30:55,440 --> 00:31:00,880 If we want to see healing, I think this is where we go. 435 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:04,880 So does the Bible instruct us in a practice of forgiveness? 436 00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:05,880 Yes. 437 00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:07,560 We also have it included in our blueprint. 438 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:11,360 It is a part of the fiber of our church. 439 00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:15,960 If you're in a community table right now, you will talk about this next week. 440 00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:19,560 And so this is a good week to spend some time thinking on what forgiveness might look like 441 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:21,320 in your life right now. 442 00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:28,880 On a very practical level, I am aware we had an election this week. 443 00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:32,680 And the race leading up to it was difficult for a lot of reasons for a lot of people. 444 00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:37,800 And we have watched ourselves become increasingly awful to each other. 445 00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:41,240 And there are real reasons for that. 446 00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:44,200 Policies affect people. 447 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:47,120 And so we have big feelings for real reasons. 448 00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:50,480 And your feelings are valid and they do matter. 449 00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:55,680 However, how we respond to our feelings is important. 450 00:31:55,680 --> 00:32:00,440 We have said and done things towards others out of our feelings regarding the election 451 00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:02,600 and leading up to it. 452 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:06,400 Some of this has been channeled incredibly well. 453 00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:08,600 Big feelings are not bad. 454 00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,840 What we do with them, we need to ask questions. 455 00:32:10,840 --> 00:32:14,200 We need to self-examine. 456 00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:19,120 And like I said, some of this energy and these feelings have been channeled in really productive 457 00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:20,120 ways. 458 00:32:20,120 --> 00:32:23,720 Action steps have been taken that reflect your values and have been in an effort to 459 00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:27,200 build something for those you love and for your community. 460 00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:29,600 And that is energy well spent. 461 00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:31,000 Keep doing that. 462 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:34,480 Most as well, some of the energy spent has been towards dismantling things that do not 463 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:37,760 reflect your values towards the building and betterment of those you love and for your 464 00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:40,640 community and that's important too. 465 00:32:40,640 --> 00:32:49,360 However, we have an opportunity to examine ourselves and choose, if our actions towards 466 00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:54,200 others, how those actions look. 467 00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:55,680 That is in front of us right now. 468 00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:58,720 And that is a very practical way. 469 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:03,920 Right now, we can spend our energies. 470 00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:06,480 I'm going to put the slides for examine back up. 471 00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:12,680 And I shared with you earlier the one, rather, I'm going to put the slides for examine that 472 00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:16,320 I shared with you earlier back up on the screen and give you a few moments to think through 473 00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:17,960 some of these guided thoughts. 474 00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:22,640 And Liam, you can actually just kind of give each slide maybe 10 seconds and move through 475 00:33:22,640 --> 00:33:25,120 them and go back through them again. 476 00:33:25,120 --> 00:33:29,560 You can also take a picture of the questions to save for this week. 477 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:33,080 But I would say a practice of self-examination and forgiveness might be something we want 478 00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:37,640 to be extra mindful of putting into play in our lives. 479 00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:42,180 Where we are spending less time counting offenses and building them up in our mind, which I 480 00:33:42,180 --> 00:33:44,240 am badly subject to as well. 481 00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:49,040 I am amazing at building up big stories in my head about things that I felt were offensive 482 00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:50,620 to me. 483 00:33:50,620 --> 00:33:55,520 And being more open and humble with the Lord on my own heart and honest. 484 00:33:55,520 --> 00:34:02,760 I need to be honest about the root of my feelings and what I'm doing with them. 485 00:34:02,760 --> 00:34:07,640 And if I'm staying closed off and jaded or if I'm staying soft and open. 486 00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:13,300 These are things I need to reflect on. 487 00:34:13,300 --> 00:34:18,520 The world is full of a lot of evil, which I know sounds very hopeless. 488 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:21,200 I like to think I'm a realist. 489 00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:25,640 But sometimes beyond our own belief, we are often complicit. 490 00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:30,600 The way we rarely think that we are the problem, but we are not the good guys. 491 00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:37,640 This is why self-reflection and forgiveness needs to be a regular practice in our lives. 492 00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:39,160 Forgiveness is offered to you freely. 493 00:34:39,160 --> 00:34:41,520 It is available to you. 494 00:34:41,520 --> 00:34:45,200 You do not have to earn it. 495 00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:50,320 But to fully experience it, you do need to be reflective. 496 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:54,240 You need to be honest with yourself. 497 00:34:54,240 --> 00:35:00,360 And the more you're able to have that practice happening, you can be wise and generous with 498 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,720 that in our world with others. 499 00:35:03,720 --> 00:35:06,260 And we need that. 500 00:35:06,260 --> 00:35:09,400 The church needs to lead the way on that. 501 00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:15,400 So take time looking through these questions, take pictures of them to use throughout this 502 00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:16,400 week, if you'd like. 503 00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:22,560 And in just a moment Pastor Greg is going to come up and lead us in communion. 504 00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:31,080 God, we ask for your love to fill us. 505 00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:38,360 We ask that you would continually keep in front of us that you are not standing with 506 00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:46,080 judgment ready for us, but you are standing with openness and welcome and love for us 507 00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:48,880 to restore us to wholeness always. 508 00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:53,200 For us and our neighbor, always. 509 00:35:53,200 --> 00:36:00,960 So help us be faithful to that call in our lives. 510 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:25,800 Take some time to think through these questions.