This is episode 40 fucking hell that's loud in it. This is episode 40 of the what's the buttons podcast
You cunts and we would have and we could have done it without you. So sit down. Oh
You already farting on the fucking you're gonna pick that mic up at all today or you're just gonna fucking
I've got Eminem in front of me fucking hood up with his cap
You I seem like you have
Absolutely, no energy whatsoever
And it's it's very boring
It's very boring
Yo
Slim shading, you know, I'm trying to get blood out of a fucking stone. You're gonna liven up a bit
Do you want I want you to be alive? It's fucking
12 minutes past 3 in the afternoon on a Friday jokes me fuck your jokes. Fuck you episode 40 is up to a banger
That's mad in it
Now you think about it. That's a lot of episodes for two bad ends in a box, correct?
It's great
Never used to be in a box
Would you?
What you mean never used to be in a box? We used to be in some swanky little place at its own bathroom
Could have had a shower if I wanted
This has its own bathroom. No, it's got a toilet and it's got a shower. How's it? Yes
How have you not seen that?
Shoes it's pissing. Yeah, they're in kitchen as a bedroom behind it as a kitchen in there
Don't know it just felt special over there I know I know everything the problem is is that I
I don't want to turn it into a proper like
Podcast office type with all your shit
See that is the epitome of what vapors look like the way you've just fucking shove that in your mouth
Like a purpose to pretend I was like a like a blood-gourged bellend
It's very silly. What flavor you got in that same flavor always have strawberry and watermelon with ice
Never claimed to be cool just needed to give up smoking
I just I can't be bothered to turn this place into the podcast room that we had purely because
When it comes to moving I've got a packet all the way again
So I'm just not gonna do it until until we move and then I'll set up a proper place
Yes, sir, not that anyone gives a fuck no one can fucking see it
They will where this is part of the problem isn't it? We want to set up go pros
We want to do little clips on ticky tocky and Instagram me all them ones fucking Instagram
But to do that, we need some sort of a presentable
Yeah, why does this look a mess? Yeah, well, you know, you see I'm on tick-tock. They've got tables
They've got they ain't holding their mics. Yes stands for it. So we can't just drill into this
basket
Into this basket table. There's literally nothing to set a stand up. It's so annoying
Obviously you could get like the floor ones
But I've fucking I'm not having like a six foot stand next to us with the mic dangling
How Ryan did say why not get some mic stands and then like weigh them down Ryan can fucking sharp on me
I don't give a fuck. No, we can't you can't just put weights on them
Why because you need why why would you mean wait? Well, because if you put these into a mic stand, that's not
Nailed down. It's just gonna trip tip over in it. No, you just get a mic stand for this mic
Which you can get they're not expensive, but they're little
Why haven't we got them then because they're little and you'd have to sit there talking like this and we ain't sitting here for an
Hour and a half two hours talking like this
This works until we get a check because all the other stands the ones that are decent and that I was looking at they
Screw into the fucking table
Do you do my fucking editing, you know, what have we got today there's your intro
What do you want to kick off with fucking
Let's bang on about Valheim for a little bit go ahead
You've been playing it more than me you can't you fucking go ahead no your show you start off and I'll jump in
I've really enjoyed it. It's good. Yeah. Yeah, you said last week
About Valheim. What did you say?
What?
Fucking shit. I hate it. I played it as rubbish. Oh shit. Yeah, we haven't done a pod since then have we? No
We had a little we had a little go together didn't we I stuck to my words and I try I give it another go
He does he does give it a go. I'll give him that and it is possibly one of the best games
I've ever played it's fucking it's basically if you've been listening to the pod from day dot
You will remember the episode of when we first start talking about no man's sky and how I would sit there and guys
wanker tried it bloody bloody blah and then
For the next five episodes after that one was hyping up no man's sky and have been since well
This is basically the same thing Valheim is
absolutely
Incredible and it is so much fun when I tell you that me and ash
I spent collectively what two and a half three hours
Doing absolutely fuck all and it is possibly the funnest thing I have done on a video game
It is so much fun. It's great. I've been admittedly
World of Warcraft has just had a massive update. So I've sort of been drawn to that a bit
But I'm very conscious of the fact that I haven't played Valheim for a couple of days
Which I think is a good thing when I'm sitting there going I haven't played this I need to jump on it
So I will
but oh
I can't like you described as a a survival light
It's an exact. It's exactly that I said in the last last episode how I hated building mechanics so fucking much and
This obviously has a lot of building mechanics in it and it's so good. Oh
It's like I said it's something about it that makes you want to build. I don't know what it is
This this game doesn't punish you. That's the best way about it
This is a survival game, but you are not punished for making mistakes and for bill
So the the repairing your your gear is free when you die you drop all your loot
But you can go back and collect it
But unlike other games if you die again on your way to collect it that loot doesn't disappear
It stays there
You can die however many times you fucking want your loot will still be there until you go and pick it up
And then when you're building the the materials you need to build a lot of stuff are very easy to get hold of and if you fuck
Something up most games when you play something and you dismantle it you only get a fraction of
The material back you might get 75% back of say you put down to it costs 10 wood to do this
You might get back seven
So you've got to be meticulous at some points with what you do this you put something down however much it costs you break
It down you get the exact same amount back
so
Building is a piece of piss because you can really experiment with it a fucking
And tell them about our journey how it went fucking
It's so stupid you can so there's you can turn
You can turn your game into a server. It's like minecraft basically where you got a seed everyone's got their own seed and
Ash turn his into a server that I could join obviously he's on Xbox, and I'm on I'm on PC
It is cross play between the two
Is a bit buggy, but let's we forget. This is a game preview so this ain't even fucking this ain't even out yet
But I joined ashes server and then naturally first thing I did was raid his camp
Took all of his shit stole all my resources
Yeah, and then lied about it. No didn't lie you did. I did it. Where's this? How many of you took?
It's ironic I'm not even in that troll hide shit anymore when I kill a troll
I don't need the hide it just goes and sits in a box
I
robbed him up I
geared up and
we proceeded to
Build a ship because we could both make shitty little rafts with a sail on it
But ash unlocked the the the blueprints to make a nice big. What would you call it? It's called a carve
That's what the boat is actually called us called a car. I needed some bronze nails of which I
Broke down some of my bronze and made some bronze now sort of ten. I think I needed mmm and then crafted the car
It's basically looks like a Viking ship done it big sale, but not as big as a proper see a reddit post today, dude
Where's my car? That's why I remember
It's called
so funny
And we made one of them and there's different biomes
in this in your servers, so you have like the swamp the fucking mist lands the
I don't know. What's the first one that you land in the meadow the meadows?
The black forest places like basically
Our plan was to get to the swamp which is where ashes next boss was they had to defeat and
you know our only way of getting there was traversing the high seas in this in this boat and
We
We made the mistake of cape keeping all our gear with us
Because this was a treacherous journey despite me saying to you don't take all your good shit
Just in case I continue to take absolutely every piece of bronze
Equipment and tools that I had I took everything other than a shield. Let's be honest a quite frankly pathetic little boat
It's one step up from floating on a plank of wood
Yeah, it's just got a decent sail and a bit of length to it
But it's no by no means a galleon on yeah understand that when you sail in this game
There is wind and there is wind direction and if you are sailing against the wind
It is just like real life. You are not fucking going anywhere
No, you're going backwards so you have to paddle that shit and let me tell you listeners the entire journey
Was against the wind
It was fucking annoying
It was a long way and we what it was because it was ash was on ash was on the on the rudder
He was he was in control of the ship and I was I was holding fast on the sail
I was just standing holding on to that
And um at one point I jumped and jumped off the boat
Scared the shit out of myself because there's stamina in this game
And if you run out of stamina when you're swimming you begin to drown
so
I was panicked because we were moving at quite a pace
And we were sailing for what?
About an hour. It was a long time close to an hour. I don't know where
The swamp is so we picked a direction decided that that direction felt like the wrong direction
So after traveling that way 180 degrees I turned and went a different way
I decided in my own head a swamp logistically would probably be a south
So we headed south
No idea where we're going. There's fog of war all over the map
Which means you can't see the map until you've gone there
So we're just you know sailing down looking for something that doesn't look like a forest or a meadow
Yep and sure enough we found exactly what we were looking for
And then what's that blue thing?
We're sailing and the the swamp trees render in we go oh fucking hell there it is there it is
We finally found it
Bearing in mind that it tells you when a new day starts on this and obviously you can tell when the sun rises and the sun sets
We'd sailed through the darkness
Yeah
And the sunshine and the darkness
That was cool though because when we were sailing through the darkness I held out a torch
While I was like a flaming torch while I was holding onto the sails and the torch effect like the flame
It wasn't just a static flame it was following the direction which I thought it looked very cool
But yeah we rocked up on this swamp and there's a beach hut
It's just this hut on stilts in the water
We were very excited we were like giddy school children
There's something new I think that's the swamp I think that's the swamp
What's that blue thing?
You have to understand that me and Ash have done virtually no research into this game
Little tips and tricks but when it comes to actual areas of interest and enemies and stuff like that
I think I'm correct in saying that we haven't really looked at anything
So a lot of the shit that we're doing is new to us
So we've seen this beach hut we're happy that we can see land because the fucking seas are rough
And this hut we start sailing towards and all of a sudden this big gargantuan blue ghost thing
Appears out of the hut terrified we were absolutely terrified
Well I wasn't I was just like we won't go over there then
I fucking was
Until you screamed he's coming this way
Basically what happened I have a habit of when I panic I attack and I panicked and I shot him
Arrow through this ghostly figure naturally the arrow went straight through it but
Which I find stupid it went through the ghost and because it went through the ghost it aggroed the ghost
To which it does not have to swim because it's a ghost and it headed towards us and sure enough
We were heading against the wind
Screaming at me go go go I can't go nowhere all I can do is paddle at the speed of paddling
I can't I put the sails up the winds blowing the other way if anything it's fucking blowing us towards the cunting thing
We were terrified absolutely fucking terrified and then it comes over it starts hitting us
So Ash starts trying to attack it I'm shooting arrows at it doing nothing it's just fucking going through it
This thing is hitting like a tank oh it's damaging us like a motherfucker
It was high up as well
Yeah you couldn't fucking swing for it and it it it smacked us off of the ship
Well it didn't I took one mighty who who I was I got a little bit of a hard time
I was like who who I was I got it I jumped up because it was smashing up the boat and I didn't want the boat to go under
So I thought I've got to try and do something it smacked me off the ship so I jumped in the air to hit it
And as I jumped in the air to hit it I jumped too far and landed in the sea
So we're both in the sea at this point swimming against the stamina bar depleting before we just drowned anyway
To shore which wasn't far away shore was very close you're talking like five meters
Away from the shore it was right fucking there and we're both we're both swimming as fast as we can screaming at each other down the mikes
Well this wraith follows us and then we died and we died just straight up died
I got hit everything and got sent and then ash got sent basically we died at the same time and just watched both our loot bags just
Just plop and the they plopped on the beach is so painful
It's like we was that close to getting onto land and possibly being able to sprint away
but yeah and the most upsetting part so the way this game works is
you can build beds and homes and things like that and you can set it as a spawn point and
What you can do is if you don't want to spawn back at your bed
You can hit save and it will spawn you where you've saved the game
Now this doesn't work on water because if you die
It's unfair for the game to just spawn you back in water because you're just constantly going to keep dying. So
Our spawn or certainly my spawn was locked to the bed that I made in your base
Which was over an hour away from where we had sailed across the water and I have absolutely zero resources
And let me add one more thing to this because I was robbing up ash's gaff
He can put down this totem thing and when he activates it
It means that only the person that owns that server and that base or whoever activated the totem
Can open any of the doors any of the chests anything that's been built there and ash had activated this just before we set sail
So when I spawned back in my bed, I could not do anything
I couldn't get out. I couldn't get out. I couldn't look into any of my shit made. Yeah, I had to fuck it. Oh
I only put that down
Because he just kept stealing stuff and I've got some valuable items. I didn't want going and miss because I didn't know they were worth yet
It was he kept stealing so I popped it down. I didn't expect to be back there empty handed. It was unbelievable
I was so angry and it was getting it was getting rather late. It was a funny angry though, wasn't it?
It wasn't like an angry. It was hilarious. But then then the mission begun
We were determined. We decided but bearing in mind all my tools are gone
I got no I got no I'll look back to fucking wood tools, you know
Mm-hmm. All my bronze tools are gone. I've got no hammers and pickaxes and because I'm in ash's server
I lose my shit if I go back to my server
I don't get to keep it so and we didn't know
If when I've died in his server all my loot that's on the floor
If I go back to my server and then go back and then come back if my shit's still going to be there
so
Made the executive decision to try again, but bear in mind
A boat was an hour away at the bottom of the ocean. Yeah, so we had to make another one
But guess who didn't have any bronze resources to create a carve
I guess we're sailing and down there on a pallet. Yeah, literally literally imagine a pallet with a sail on it
It is like it took so long to get back there
Reese fucked off while I was sailing to go and change the bed. It was
It was unbelievable how long that took and it wasn't even it wasn't even like there was no drama on the way
So again, we're against the fucking wind. Yeah, that's something I swear. That's just a bug for me because you that have well
I'll get it spot. It's bollocks. But um, we
We uh, it's mapped out as to where we are where our deaths are. We know where our shit is
We know where that fucking beach hut is
So again another hour sailing in the storms with fuck. I'm literally standing in my pants
I got fucking yeah, we're both we're both just in our pants. We got no
Nothing, no health no health or stamina because we haven't eaten any food
Yeah, because we got nothing on us. So we eventually made it as Ian Bill family said once
I got nothing left
Basically it we made it we made it to the island where the swamp was where our shit was and we see that beach
Oh my lord. Yeah, we saw it again. You like take a wide berth take a wide berth fucking wraith was sitting there
That's what it's called. Because we're getting closer to it and Reese's decided to start googling it
Just because we're getting a bit panicky now and he's like, ah, it's all right
The wraiths only come out at night and it's bright sunshine. It's the morning
Well, why is that fucking wraith sitting in that shed then and and google was telling me the wraiths only spawn at night
And then they they they despawn at dawn
But on some very rare occasions they can spawn during the day and sure enough
This was the rare occasion where fucking spawn during the day. It wasn't even in the shed was he was on our fucking
He was right on our fucking loot attacking deer. So yeah, imagine this the fucking beach hut where he is
There's a good hundred meter gap between that beach hut and our fucking loot and for whatever reason this ghost that was
presiding in this beach hut had wandered over to our fucking loot and was attacking goblins and shit
Right on top of our loot. He was protecting his items his loot. We were fucking terrified
we made it very close to this loop and
The the issue that we were having is when I was joining ash's server
There was a lot of yo-yoing going on. So the servers weren't quite matching up
So I would be floating in the air for him and on me
Ash would be in the ground. There was a lot of terrain that weren't rendering in for for both parties
So there was a lot of water and lakes and shit where I could in my screen
It was land that I could run over on ash's screen. It's a lovely fucking river. So
It made it very difficult when we got to our loot because for him
Everything was um on land and for me everything was underwater
So I could it was very difficult
I'll pull it up to this little this little bank here and i'll run down the beach and get get the stuff
He was like what land there is no land. I was like we're pulling up to the land now
He's like no, it's just water. Yeah, so he stayed in the boat
And I jumped off and done a bit of recon in
And uh, yeah, we managed to make it down there
The rave slowly fucked off and we got our gear and we were gassed we were hyped up man
You you you saved it and fucked off and oh no, you started helping me back didn't you?
Yeah, literally what happened so I googled it and I
apparently you could hit forward slash reset spawn and
Because what happened is I
logged out
And then logged back in hoping that it would bring me back to the beds
But what it did is it just brought me back exactly to where our loot was so I was like fuck
I've now got my loot back, but
We have to travel back and we're stuck on the swamps
Wraiths knocking about with absolutely zero fucking idea of what we're doing
um
And yeah, turns out I couldn't we we had to make the journey back which was which was arduous
Yeah, it was a bit rough. It was rough, but we were celebrating
We sell it we felt like we'd had a victory all we'd done is found out where the swamp was died went back
And got our gear and went home, but it felt like we'd gone on a fucking adventure
We had gone on an adventure and then we sailed home and then I got home a lot quicker because the rendering fucked up
And that ran home and I had to go along the sea ash was fucking
Sailing through a lake and I was running on top of it before we got home though. We found we took a risk
We saw a big
Uh island looking motherfucker with things on it. Oh shit. Yeah. Yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah smash some rocks off the back of it barnacles. Yeah some barnacles
We thought this is a bit weird the fucking island started moving shaking. Yeah, we jumped off in panic
Reese, I don't know what happened to him. He just got spun off in the sea fucking stayed on top
I couldn't jump and he lost discord, uh chat and he just texted me fucking come and get me
He's just bobbing up and down in the ocean
Well, if you're in the water when you when you start moving you start training your stamina
But you can tread water without draining any stamina. So what happened was we smashed these barnacles off what because I thought there were eggs
Originally, yeah, we got and it comes up like their barn. We took a risk there though. That was that was a big risk and
We smashed two barnacles off and then yeah this
Turtle thing or whatever it fucking was because it just looked like a landmass. Yeah
started roaring and then
Dive down into the water and like you say ash jumped off
And I panicked and stayed perfectly still and the fucking
The animal disappeared and I was just fucking floating but then the discord dropped out ash starts sailing away
And I was like no, no, no, no, no, no because I fucking I thought it was a lost cause
I didn't know that you could tread water. Yeah
I'd used all of my stamina from trying to fucking get off of this rock
Because sailing in this game ain't it ain't like gta where you just press accelerate and go you got a fucking
You got a paddle or you got to set your sails and the wind directions
It ain't just like a case of turning around and go and get him. Yeah
It's a painful experience if you're doing it and you can't just jump on it. You have to go up the ladder as well
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, I found out the hard way if you if you come if you come off your raft or boat or whatever into the water
Yeah, there's there's ladders on certain points that you have to use to climb up
So if you run out of stamina, you're gonna start drowning before you fucking find that ladder
But yeah, we made it and you made it back
Made it fucking back
Literally we got to ash was seeing a nice river saying let's take the risk and go through that the river weren't there for me
It was just a fucking mountain
so I
We went I stayed on the raft and started going through this lake that this river that I could not see
I went under the map and I was with ash and then I jumped off of the raft
And then it pinged me into the sky and then on top of this mountain
So I was like fuck it. I'm running back. I ran back and then logged out
Ran back grabbed my shit and then went I managed to make it back
Finally after that ordeal and then the base got attacked when I got attacked by fucking all sorts of monstrosities
Smashing all my stuff up. It's fantastic. It was quite the adventure, but I'm pleased to report
I went back there on my own managed to make it back to the swamp. I took just I took I took fuck all
I took fuck all I took leather pants is all I took
And the exact amount of resources to create one
one working crafting station thing
And enough to create a teleport a teleport
So now I have a teleporter down in the swamp with a semi-built base. It's not semi-built. It's just a fucking box
um
So I can come and go from there as I please so now and i've been exploring the swamp
Which is exactly what you want and that's exactly what I need to do. It's fucking terrifying
It's dangerous
And yeah, there's a lot of dangerous things there. I think it's
So a lot of the enemies on this game are actually very easy to combat
because you have the
What's it called the parry?
You have the parry and the invent what's the invincible? You know the invis frames the invis frames
So if you like elden ring if you roll into the enemy or if you're rolling
Then the any attacks can't damage you
Um, I haven't tried it with bosses yet. It's only good if you've got the stamina and your stamina drains quick
Yeah, you got to be smart about it. They're like the swamp. There's blobs in the swamp
And they've seen they poison the shit out of you and the eels they're no fucking joke the draugr are a joke
It's so odd apparently there's like a there's like a massive enemy. That's that's hidden as tree roots
That fucking comes out of the ground and starts attacking you brilliant. I haven't come across that i've been in a dungeon
Um, it's quite different from the burial chambers. I have seen what the boss is in the swamps. It don't look fun
No, it really don't look fun. I found out what the boss is so I have got the boss marker down
Yeah, no, they don't look good. No, I mean, yeah, I mean my help is fun
Yeah, I mean the swamp itself is hard enough. It's terrifying because it's always raining as well
Yeah, it's always fucked so you're always wet and when you're wet your stamina goes down quicker and the the the
Uh, but getting back quick to the the enemies like when I first see a troll that thing fucked me up
And they were so difficult in my head
But once once you told me about the in the invis frames
So fucking easy because you just roll into them and and and do all that shit
If you do fuck it up and they eat you it don't offer you take one or two of them
Yeah, yeah, two two max I think for well, especially for me. Um, but with the wraiths obviously
Those things because of what the ordeal we went through
I fucking googled how to combat them because I was like I'm not getting to the swamp
And being fucked up by a wraith without knowing how to kill the thing and it is simple as just parrying it
If you parry the thing apparently they go down really quick and they have only one
Um ability so they use the exact same attack on the exact same frequency
So, you know exactly what's going to happen and they are extremely easy once you know how to just gonna be forever scarred from that experience
Oh, so I won't ever feel I knew it was gonna happen as well. There was a bit in the back of my mind
I was like we're sailing this far
And we know that the swamps are dangerous. I was like we're gonna get fucked the minute that we land
It's gonna be pandemonium
And it fucking was a nightmare
I could do with your help to be honest because i'm at this awkward position now where obviously you can't take
You can't take uh minerals back through the teleport through a teleport
Yeah, and i've found obviously new minerals, so i'm like digging up iron and stuff now
But I can't do nothing with it
So i've got a chest full of iron and i've took um
Well, you can well, that's what I mean. I've built uh, i've built a uh, build a forge and shit like that
I've built a smelter
You have to do all your shit there
But I have to like say I have to build it all and I don't want I have to build it in a place where I can
You need to go and get the resources first and then come back. Yeah, but it's very time consuming
It's time consuming, but I also don't I still want to have my main base be my main base
I just want to have this as a little side piece
because I don't want to have to traipse all this fucking ore all the way back up there every time to
Uh, because I see on reddit a lot of people do that a lot of people have like six people
And they'll just do like ore runs and people come in to help you just run stuff back to your base
Which is very cool
And it's just a good time i'm all for that shit because I went and did some ore farming myself
And I built a little cart that you could sort of or is fucking heavy
All right
You have a weight limit of 300 like fallout and a lot of games skyrim you name it
You have a weight limit and 300 is that fucking limit gone psa
I think that's the right word
Acronym is it a psa? Yeah public service announcement. Oh
The yeah that trader he sells something that increases. I haven't found the trade yet. I know that with this so there's
Those fyi there's one trader in every server
Um that does not move location has a force field around it. That's invisible
So if you are in if you're with the trade and no enemies will attack
Past a certain point he's only in one location. He's only in one location fucking hell. He does not move location
And if you are within
Is it 200 meters or something he will come up on the map?
I was gonna say the fuck you're supposed to find he will he will pop up on the map when you're within a certain distance
But he never he never moves location. So a lot of people build a portal. Yeah, right there makes sense
Um, because i've got so much stuff to sell. Yeah, man
But there's the fucking pro tip for you as well with what story you're about to tell that the little cart thing
You if you roll you can get out of the cart. You haven't got a oh, yeah
Yeah, so so always very heavy very very very heavy so you can only farm so much until you are you are encumbered
and
It makes it an absolute asshole to drag to go back to your base
Um and constantly run forwards and backwards. Luckily all the the the the deposits that I found
Are quite close to my base, but still made it a ball eight to to drag shit
But what you can do to counteract this is build a cart and it is literally just a shopping trolley
Basically that attaches to your waist and it can hold quite a decent amount of stuff
What what you have to do though before ash has given me this tip is you have to manually stand in the middle of it
where you would hook up and
Interact with it and then boom it hooks up onto you and you can sprint around and you can attack and blah
Like a donkey like a donkey would pull a cart you're doing the same. Yeah, you are the fucking donkey and
That fucking thing
Hic can it hits absolutely everything it can tiny rocks fucking tweaks that your
Physical being doesn't even interact with but the fucking cart will and it sends that thing flying
Doing backflips and all sorts of shit and obviously you can't fucking repair it unless you're next to a workbench
So you have to be really fucking careful with where you're taking this thing because if it starts to get too damaged to move
You have to then build a little base to fucking repair it and I swear to god
It was the most fucking stressful thing. I'll tell you what let me pause it and have a piss because it's going to go on
For five minutes at least give me a sec
Okay, where was I?
the car
Catching on fucking literally everything it like I say the drag from my base to these deposits was not that far
But it was far enough. I had to traverse a fucking river
I was I did not know if you could be attached to the cart and swim turns out you can
Nice had to go up mountains fucking there's enemies everywhere. You try to fucking spear something while you've got a car attached to you
Fuck me. It's so annoying
But what I've been doing
Is I'd already scouted it a couple of times before I made the cart and I mark everything on my map all the deposits
Absolutely everything the caves all sorts of shit. So I know where everything is so I knew exactly where all these deposits were
and I made it to the first deposit which was a copper deposit and
boom
The light disappears. It's nighttime
Now in this game when it's nighttime the spawns are a lot more frequent and there's fucking enemies everywhere
So I I I messaged ash about this because I was getting so annoyed about it
I was getting about eight swings of a pickaxe in boom ten enemies straight away
So I had to kill all of them. They all dropped loot. There is no way to toggle off auto loot or not. There is
I might have to look in the settings then yeah on the xbox is lb
I'll have to have a look then stick together. I'll have to have a look because fuck me because
Everything i'm killing all these enemies. That's not the issue. It's just an annoyance. They can't they can't keep up with me
I'm too powerful
But the shit that they're dropping i'm trying to fucking pick up this heavy ore
But no i've got eyeballs and fucking wood in my pockets. It's too much. It's doing my head in so I got I got a fucking
kill all these enemies
Get rid of all their shit pick up the ore mine some more ore more enemies turn up
I've got to kill them rinse and repeat right at the same time
They're bashing in my fucking cart because I've got to sort that out
I lost it at one point because it's so fucking dark and I don't have a torch on me and then
eventually ladies and gentlemen
What happened is I filled that fucking cart because I I made multiple pickaxes
All right, because I made the first mistake of going there with one pickaxe and naturally it broke off for 30 seconds
So I made about 10 of them
So I went there and I had all my pickaxes and I got as much as I fucking could
And then what happened was daytime. I was like great. This is fantastic just in time for the journey home
All the enemies are fucked off. They're still knocking around but there ain't nearly as many
So this will be all right because I put the cart on
What do I do hit a rock?
Flip the upside down straight away
So I spent five minutes trying to flip that fucker up because there is no button that you can press to just auto flip it
You have to fucking piss around with it. I was like, I'm not losing this car
I'd quickly pulled out my repair hammer even though I couldn't do anything just to check the state of the cart
It was not good. It's about a quarter of its fucking life left
So I swear to god if this car breaks before I get back to my base, I'm gonna be fuming
So I reattach it and then I get about two-thirds of the way home. I know this area. I've scouted it many times
I know exactly what's here. I've marked it all I know what the crack is, right?
Anyway, I get to this certain point where the river is I've had to go down a hill
I hear stomping
Big old fucking footsteps and I turn around there's a fucking troll
Mid swing right behind my cart before I can disconnect it sends me over the fucking river
Right. My cart is in the water. It's in the water not poking out. It's in it, right?
I don't know what the fucking I didn't know what the protocol was for if the carts full when it's in the fucking water
So I'm annoyed I'm pissed off because I've just spent all this time doing that and it's been banged in the fucking water
Right. So now I've got to deal with this troll. I'm with the cart as well. By the way, it hasn't disconnected me
I'm in the water with it. All right, so I've got a disconnect this was before I knew the rolling technique
So on the on the laptop
You have to look at the fucking little bars on it and press E and they're only very small bars
So it's very easy very difficult to do it quickly. All right, so I've done that I've disconnected
all whilst I'm trying to get away from this troll and then a
Battle ensued it was like it was nighttime again
Suddenly, there's all these fucking enemies that have come out of the woodwork whilst I'm trying to deal with this fucking troll
And then after about five minutes, I do kill the troll
All right, and then I go and check up on the cart. I've lost it
I've been fighting the troll for that long traversing so much different shit because I've got to keep my stammering up stamina up and still
Roll and dodge this fucking cunt that I've lost
My cart, right? So another 10 minutes searching around I find it. I find it in the water and sure enough
You can just go and reattach so I did I reattached
And then back home to my base and then happy as Larry and then I messaged you and I was like I make all this shit
Because I've finally got enough blah blah blah blah blah, but that was the most single stressful thing
And I've beaten millennia and Elden Ring. All right, Ash has even heard that one. This was more stressful than that
I watched it was fucking unbelievable the the fear that I'm not scared of trolls anymore if they pop up
I'm not bothered because I know how easy they are to kill now
But when you are attached to a cart that is filled to the brim of all that you desperately need
And you've now got to defend that and yourself
Amongst a ton of enemies and a troll. Oh also that that all ain't coming back
I don't know if it respawns after like 60 days or whatever
But you go back to that copper deposit that copper what you've mined is gone
So if you lose all that you can't just go back to all the copper you've it does respawn
But I can't remember the exact it ain't soon because all the stuff I've I'm on day 60 and all the stuff I've mined ain't come back. Yeah. Yeah
So, yeah, that's that's that's vows
So yeah, that's that's that's valheim really you need friends. I think it's one of those games where it's fantastic when you're playing solo
But if you really want to get to the to the nitty and gritty of it, you need
You need pals to fucking jump in with I need you to help me build this swamp base
I'm almost tempted to just sack off my shit and then just fucking piss around in your server
Yeah, because I feel like it would be more fun for that because we could still do bosses because the the beauty of it is
There are I don't know how many bosses but there are bosses in this game
But once you kill it you can go back and kill it again
They you have to spawn them from alters and there's more than one altar for every boss
Because I've already killed the first boss twice
So it's not even like I've missed out on anything because we can go back and do it again
Well, we still got to help you kill your second boss yet on your server
And plus you owe me some fucking bronze
I mean, you've got full bronze set. I've only got a bronze. I ain't got full bronze set. I ain't got the helmet
Well, I've only got the bronze shield
I don't know you fuck all bronze
I haven't taken didn't take any of your bronze
Everything you wouldn't have built that stuff if it weren't for me. I was giving you circling cause
I was giving you fucking all sorts of shit. No, no, no, no, no, you didn't give me any circling cause
I never got any fucking I sorted all of that on my own. Feebed everything and that you want to know something that bone shield
Don't even use it. You just put it on the wall. Don't even fucking use it. That thing is an ornament now
I didn't like it because the shield that I had
You can parry and it stuns them and then makes them more vulnerable
But that bone shield it reduced your movement speed by 20 percent and when you parried it didn't stun them
It just pushed them away
So I would then have to waste even more stamina running over to them to attack them
And it didn't put them in a stunned state either just pushed them away
So I was like this is of no use to me. I've seen some interesting builds. I saw someone yesterday
I watched a 15 minute video of a guy making an entire
Mine nice. He's got a bridge that goes across a fully working. I don't know how he does it. It's genius and another
Cool building thing. I've seen people do is put moats around their builds
Very cool. And uh another tip is to you know, you can terrain
Manipulate so you can like in state land so they're putting like terrain round their place
Yeah, so because it's indestructible. Yeah, so yeah, there's a lot of cool stuff that you could do like some of the builds
I haven't looked into too many because I don't want to spoil it. I don't know what the end game is
I don't know what the end gear is and I don't want to know I want to discover it for myself
Because there's nothing more exciting than when I found that um
that iron
Or for the first time and I ran back. Oh, what's gonna be in it?
What's gonna be in it?
So I had to go and build a smelter and stuff as soon as I smelted one iron bar picked it up
And then all the crafting recipes started coming. I was like, oh this new stuff I can make
There's so much stuff. I can make fire pits. I can make prisons
Yeah, I see a real cool geezer wearing like fully dripped out like wolf style gear and he had two daggers and he was like it was
Uh, it wasn't a boss, but it was a it was a very big enemy and it was basically a one-shot
Attack and he had both his daggers and obviously the special ability you jump in the air
Yeah, and this geezer with two daggers
He jumped in both arms back and then just stabbed this fucker in the ground and it went poof
And it come up like two thousand something damage. I was like, what the fuck
I want to I want to go out and farm some more of that. Um
Some more of that, uh barnacles because I want to make one of them abyssal daggers. I think they're called
And oh I was watching a guy kept calling it abso
No, that's painful. An abso dagger. Fuck off man. And there's like sea serpents. Luckily we didn't come across any of them
But I saw some guy come across sea serpent
Um, they're difficult. You see you just about manage to kill them before they destroy a carve
So you but you have to be good with a bow but you but that when you kill them
All their loot sinks to the bottom of the ocean. So there's a way to get their loot
You have to you have to craft a harpoon and you have to harpoon them and drag them to land
Then kill them. Yeah, and then loot them. Yeah, so this game is deep man
The guy that I was watching that was talking about that said that you sort of need two people and one person to harpoon it on
And another person just bang it with arrows and then another thing so you can't
You can't dive into water in this game. But what you can do is build a ladder
The higher you are the deeper you will go when you jump into the water
I saw that. If you lose anything you got to fucking try and build something
The building mechanics I need to get better at like the actual building because there's a lot of shit where like my
I would really love to tear my base down and start again
But I wouldn't be able to hold all the all the gear so it would kind of do my head in a bit but
I can't put a roof on mine. I've made it too wide
Too high before I can actually do anything. I need to sort of build small small buildings and stuff first
architecturally I'm not smart so it's very difficult to like know where to put the beams and
Yeah, I've seen some fucking mega mega bases like some guy that built an entire underground bit underneath
Like one of the last bosses and he was like apparently like it's the safest place to be and it's an entire fucking area
We've all stacked up inventory boxes and shit. What the fuck?
Well, this this shit's one of my funny deaths came yesterday while I was trying to build a second base
I had done what you just said
I was trying to put the roof on and I built up loads of ladders like stairways and stuff
I was like the top of this just fucking banging away trying to put like little posts in and stuff and I said
What the fuck is that?
Look down a little bit too late. There was a
Draugr just smashing the bottom of the ladder
And by the time I realized the ladder had fucking snapped at the bottom
Then it goes all the pieces of the ladder fall. I just watch it exploding as I fought to my death with my 25 health
That's great
I mean, but I laughed I thought that's very humorous and I didn't spawn far away
But had I been miles away, I'd have been very upset, but that's the I was just trying to build man
Just trying to build
I think I might actually take the time and because you you you lose so much time
I can see how people put thousands of hours in this game because you spend so much time
just
Live in life in this game
You don't have to go was it you that was talking to me about or was it stef who was saying that there's a guy who
Who has done the entire thing?
Like without killing any bosses
No, I didn't know that it was stef then stef was telling me that there's a there's a guy who she was watching
Um who doesn't didn't have like the pickaxes or anything to mine certain shit and doesn't have the resort the
The the equipment to do certain stuff
So he was using things like like trolls to smash up all
And was getting hold of the ore from that and then being able to make stuff from that
So he he wasn't actually killing any bosses and had all this shit
Because he was just using the the things that you had around him and I find that crazy. I see
And uh tips yesterday. They're saying that to to
Knock down trees you can knock a tree into into other trees and then you can you can replant trees
Strategically so that when you knock it down, it will have a domino effect and also with trolls
You know them spikes that you can set up. Yeah, you can put them in the ground
This guy built a strip of them aggroed a troll
And then he said if you build them and then you
um, you plow, uh terrain over it to a certain point
it will register to your character as
As dirt rather than spikes and it will also register to the troll as dirt rather than the spikes
So when you run through it, the troll will follow you but because it thinks it's walking over dirt
But it isn't it gets attacked by it gets damaged by all the spikes and dies nice
So you don't even have to fucking attack the thing. You just have to run it through this runway
I was like little things like that, man. They're just so uh,
I want to I want to research loads of shit at the same time. I don't know you want to discover as much as you can
I've watched like 50 tips for beginners. Yeah, so i've like but i don't want to kind of already knew them
Yeah, I don't want to watch too many because i'm like some of this stuff. I want to just discover myself
I don't know what other metals you can find
What armor pieces you can get one cool fit? Yeah when it comes to armor stuff like that
I really haven't looked at it
A whole lot one cool building tip that I saw was sitting down
If you sit down while you're building it gives you a different and camera angle like
underneath basically
For those tricky little bits and the weather obviously erodes your buildings
I've never knew that only down to uh
Half like 50 percent. So if you have a wooden structure you watch it over time. It changes color
It will go green. I see that and um,
The durability goes down, but it will never destroy it. It just takes it down to I think I think it is 50 percent
So every now and then you got to run around and repair it all but I think rock and metal and shit obviously
Reacts differently and if it's covered
It doesn't get fucked up
There's so much shit. Yeah, it's just a very fun game. It's just very peaceful. I got my bees making me honey
Yeah, just like chilling by the fire hearing the old bees at work. I wish they'd put it on playstation, man
Yeah, be cool. I'll imagine it will eventually. I think we'll fucking see that and the fact that
Bear in mind
You've been listening to us talk for 46 and a half minutes about valheim
Right and how in depth we've gone and all the shit that you can do and our own little adventures. This is a game preview
So this isn't this doesn't even have a release date yet. This this has this isn't being released
Yet, this is this is actually
Yet, this is this is alpha style shit, man
Obviously, it's got updates and stuff like that, but this isn't
This is not the full game. This is not the final product and it's already this fucking good. It's great
I'm glad you gave it a second chance. Yeah, 100 100 percent. It's fucking
It's it's just
It's one of those games where because it's a survival
you are
Given the reins to do whatever you fucking want to do. And yes, there is a story in terms of boss fights
But I feel like
Take your time with it everything that i've read so far on what what people have been saying is to just take your time
Don't rush anything just enjoy the game because you aren't on a time limit here
You do whatever you want to fucking do and if you want to go and piss around in someone else's server
You go and do that. It won't have any effect on your game and you might get some cool shit
It it's the world is is your oyster on this one and I think if you if you have an xbox or you have a pc
And you are contemplating this game because you've liked what we've said
It's like 13 quid on steam or it's free on game pass
For the sake of 13 quid if you haven't got game pass
I 100 recommend it and even if you get it on steam you can return it
so it's sort of win-win there I must say as well the um
um, I recommended this game because there's a guy at work called rich and uh,
He he like he's like he's got an old neighbor and that and he goes around and sees him and he's a gamer
But he's an old boy
He plays a lot of games and I think he's played like alderman and stuff. Yeah, so I recommended this game to him
um and uh rich told him about it and downloaded it and rich the rich ain't a gamer and uh, yeah
Yeah, I asked him the next day. How did he get on with our i'm he said he said it's fucking shit graphics are crap
so
This is for you. Fuck you david
because
Because
It's a sick game and you shouldn't judge a book. Yeah, but he's got the same viewpoint as I did
No, the graphics are shit, but they're not that's not a game for graphics
But even then minecraft graphics are shit one of my six games
But even then I take it back the graphics aren't actually that bad when you wait stick when yeah
When you really delve into the game when you look at the way the fire moves and the attacks and when enemies die
And what they poof into like this little smoke or whatever and the water and things like that. The graphics are
They are not amazing, but it is the art style of the game and they actually look really nice the sunset
Oh my god, the sun beautiful belting through the tree line. It looked the
the um
The scenery of it is stunning
For a graphically challenged game to what I thought we used to think it was but now I think it looks really good
It is it is really fucking good a lot of games like that. They're made like that one because they're not a triple a company
They're like an indie company doing it. Sorry. This game was made by five people. Do you know that exactly five people?
That's what I mean. Obviously their teams a bit bigger now, but this game was made by five motherfuckers
It's crazy project crazy like this. They wouldn't exist if you made it gta style realism
Yeah to make the scope of it
I mean procedurally generated just geniusness while we're on the uh subject molligatoni soup or as I like to call it
Uh tagatelli soup. Um, it was one of the nicest things i've ever eaten
What have you had you never had it before what molligatoni never heard of it?
Why are you calling it molligatoni? That's what it's called
I think it's called molligatoni soup
Not how you fucking spell it. Well, that's just that's how I see in my head. That's how it is
Um molligatoni soup is delicious. I thank you rich for such a delicious thing
He said have you ever had it? I said no, so he bought me a can I had it the other day
It was one of the nicest things i've ever eaten
I'm a big soup connoisseur you see but normally just vegetable and occasionally tomato
So then he was like, well, yeah another one. Sorry. I apologize molligatoni. Yeah. Sorry. I was thinking about something else
Carrot and coriander soup he bought in sorry. Are you not versed in soups? He bought it home
He bought it home. He don't live with me. He bought into work. He said here's a carrot coriander soup
I took it home yesterday put a bit in my mouth spat it back in a bowl. Actually. It's disgusting
Disgusting what's this carrot and coriander? Woof. You don't like carrot and coriander. I traded dinners with jem
That's how disgusting carrot and coriander is not for everyone and it depends if if it has cream in it as well
Well, that makes a big gross. It just tasted like dirty water. You're expecting it to be like tomato, right? Yeah
No, I wasn't I was expecting it to taste sweet
Not that I wanted it to be sweet and I like coriander. I like spices. I like herbs. I like all that it looks tasty
Taste and it's lumpy as well. Just tastes like shit. It might have just been a bad soup
So you what you don't have soups all that often. I always eat soup vegetable soup, though
I don't just vegetable because I love vegetables. You ever had chicken soup chicken. Yeah, I don't like I don't like the color
It freaks me out. Yeah, but have you ever had it? Yes disgusting
You don't like chicken soup. No, because I'm not I look at it and I go
All right, what about mushroom soup? I don't like mushrooms. Yeah, but this is did you know that mushrooms?
I don't like one up mushroom in mario is
born from dead marios
Every time a mario dies the mushroom grows and comes out and it's a dead mario. Oh dear. Yeah, it's good
The last thing b movie worst film i've ever seen fuck you rich
I knew that anyway, he keeps recommending it to everybody. It's just shit
He's like gave me a list of things that he wanted me to say
And yeah, i've seen b movie before i'm with you on that one. It's fucking awful. It's like a terrible fucking ad life
Yeah, bug's life or whatever
Just wank man. What a crappy film. I did wonder why you sent me that list
Yeah, what lol? I don't get it. You don't need to k
I understand now k with a full stop trying to be like me wouldn't yeah, I understand
I understand. I can't believe you aren't versed in soups. You need to branch out more vegetable soup
Vegetable soup is one of the most boring soups you will ever experience
There was this soup I used to get from asda and it was um
Oh fucking hell, what was it?
Like mexican chicken soup or something and he had chicken chunks in it and it was like a tomato based soup
It's so spicy and nice man. Oh
There's so many soups that are fucking banging you need to branch out more
But but carrying carrot and coriander ain't your cup of tea stay away from it
If you bought a packet of four donuts from sainsbury's, yeah
And you just bought them. Just there. How many would you eat in one sitting?
Like a
Well me and mark have both banged the whole pack individually in one sitting. Yeah, that's what I thought but I could I I wouldn't
Something's wrong if i'm only having one. Oh, yeah exactly having probably two maybe three there's a podcast
I i haven't listened to yet, but i've seen clips of it and
They were getting on this geezers case because he says elite like his go-to is probably three donuts and they're like
I have one and I regret it and i'm like what who has one and regrets it
It's saying sometimes they can only manage half. What that's what I mean. I'm like
I presumed it was the norm to bang two or three. Who's having half a donut exactly get fucked
They're the weird ones. Yeah, if you're having half a donut, you go fuck yourself. Everyone that i've asked is on our side
That's ridiculous question is what would you have in the donuts?
Right, so you got let me i'll give you the free listings. You've either got the standard sugared your sugared ring
Well, I love a sugared ring raspberry filled lava custard filled get in a bin or chocolate filled
Have you had the chocolate filled ones from um bp garages? Yeah, oh, they're fucking something else man
There's something else and they change them now. So the dough's actually chocolate as well
They put something in them that makes my tooth hurt something crazy. Yeah, that's that's called needing a filling. Oh, yeah. I know that's called
I'm going to the dentist until i'm in agony, but I prefer custard, you know
That is the worst. No, it's the best one disgusting. No, that's what I imagine that
I don't want to get too dark here and too grim. So any ladies listening cover your ears
But you're probably the only ones that will be able to answer this
That's what I imagine the consistency of spunk is like
When you put a custard doughnut in your mouth and it squirts that cold
Gloopy liquid in that's what I imagine that
Yuck. Woof
If my own cum is taking is tasting like custard i'm sucking my own dick
If i'm coming out custard i'm having some of it
It's just the consistency it's the old explicit marker on this
Is that what he said? I don't like cold stuff that's supposed to be hot or is normally eating hot
I don't like it cold
So that's why I think I don't like custard because custard to me is supposed to be hot
So your custard tastes different when it's hot and when it's cold. I like hot custard
I used to be exactly like you and only ever eat hot custard steph introduced me to cold custard
And I actually think cold custard tastes better
I couldn't but then I can't really stand on any legs because I can eat cold beans out of tin
Yeah, Steph does that's weird man. I can't do that. Yeah, I can't do that shit. They gotta be hot
Yes, that's what I mean, but I don't eat I don't eat cold food. I won't eat cold pizza
That's the guy that I work with he's off at the moment
But his like go-to snack would at work would be to bring in a tin of beans
Just sit there and eat a tin of beans. That's a good guy man. I can get behind that
It's so fucking weird. It's tasty though. It's so weird good for you. No, man. I ain't about that life
Well, i'm not anymore
No, yeah back in the day. You've got to get yourself on the soups man. Yeah, I am some fucking decent ones
Carrots and coriander is not me. But our coriander ain't for everyone man. What about mint pea soup?
Yeah, i'll give that a go for sure. They're tasty
Anyway, we've been doing this for ages should we move on
Move on swiftly
God of war inspired teenage mutant ninja turtles the last ronin game in the works so
That's something so that's that's that one on my 2023 bingo list
Fucking god of war teenage mutant ninja turtles, but apparently the um
the
Teenage mutants turtles the last ronin is actually a comic so it's based on something that off
Substance is not just random. Yeah, and it's it's based on what I read earlier in a
In a future where michael angelo is the only living turtle and he uses
All of the his other teenage mutants turtle weapons. So he's got all these powers weapons. Do we know who's making this?
I don't know. Oh, I haven't looked into that. I haven't looked that far
um, but um
Yeah, I mean god of war is going to feel like a god of war kind of game
That's what the game with the you know going around the semi open cinematic hack and slash. Yeah that kind of job
I mean, I love teenage mutants turtles hope master splinters in it. I don't know if he is but he's the goat
Um, I mean, yeah, obviously it's gonna be a long way away, but still sounds very creative juices flowing for sure
Sounds very very very promising. Does that sound good?
I like that. I have to find out who's potentially going to be making that one
Well, i'll look into that while you discuss saturn moniker. Oh, yeah
That'd be sick to be fair nothing really massive to talk about golem just that it's been delayed
On one console the old switch
Why it's been delayed. I don't know
They haven't I don't believe they've specified as to why it's been delayed on switch. They never normally do
Um, I I personally think that's just going to become the norm now now hogwarts have done it and they got away with it
Like in terms of not too much by oh what have you done? I think people are just gonna be like, okay
That's the switch is going to come later. That's just the way this is a weird one for me because I think with hogwarts legacy
It's been delayed on the on the ps4 and the xbox one
And including the switch so with this one with golem. Why has it only been the switch?
What is the what is the thing with this one that has meant that it's only the switch that has incurred a delay
And I can only think it is the docking that holds so much issue with with um
With development but i'm with you on that one. I believe that that the because the the switch is not
branded as a competitor
To things like the xbox and the playstation. It's not in the same category. It's not in the same world
The xbox one is a little bit more expensive than the xbox one
But it's still a little bit cheaper than the xbox one
So it's not marketed as a game that you
Elden ring get it now on the nintendo switch. That's not like it's not its main bank is not having the fucking whole
Player base playing elden ring and games like that
It just has the ability to play certain games and I was thinking
how
many games do you allow to have delays for the switch before you a
Beef up the switch or b
Let your customer base your player base
Be aware that if they want to play these new generation games, they're gonna have to deal with delays on the switch
Because what do you do?
What do you agree? What what you so what do you
do a new games announced for the ps5 and the xbox series x
and
Sorry, yeah is no
Series x is the beefy one. Yeah, sorry
um
A new games announced for the ps5 and the series x and then it's also announced for the the previous generations including the switch
with a release date of
next year in october
Are you gonna say from from then from the announcement that it's going to be a different date for the switch or you're going to wait
Until halfway through and then and then announce there will be a delay
Like how how is it going to work?
Are you just going to keep like not saying that there's delays and wait until the last minute or are you just going to say?
like as nintendo is coming out on the switch, but
Later on I think it's just going to become more and more common practice that ps4
And xbox one
If that's the last one, I can't remember
Um, just just keeps getting left behind a little bit and switch. I think it's become more and more
uh
Frequent because they're gonna have to leave them behind at some point
The just the way it is the technological gap is a lot smaller than what it used to be
So the jump from ps3 to ps4 was massive
The difference in those consoles was fucking huge the jump from ps4 to ps5 not so much
The ps especially the ps4 pro from that to the ps5
PS5
Technologically is not
Massive it's still big. It's still a big leap, but it isn't astronomical
so
For for having having a ps5 on day one. You did not fucking need it
You still don't need a ps5 right now
There ain't enough ps5 only games as if you're if you're listening and you're really struggling to get out of a ps5
Don't stress about it. Honestly if your ps4 whatever you're using is working
Don't worry because you don't need a ps5 at the moment. There is not enough to warrant having one
you're not missing out on anything, but
so the
the
The gap between the the last generation and this generation of consoles isn't nearly as big
however
The the ps5 and the xbox series x are still being held back
By those previous generations when it comes to game development because you imagine
Santa Monica come out on their own back and said that god of war was held back because of the ps4
Which of course it would be because you've made a game for the ps5 and you've now got to go back and make sure that
That game will run on the ps4
So you have to not overhaul it but definitely change certain aspects of it to make it run
Which is time that could have time and money that could have been spent on the ps5 version beefing that motherfucker up
Like I said to stef if you you look at unreal engine 5 how crazy that engine is the capability of that engine
You make a game that will push the ps5 to its limits because it is beefy enough for it
You then decide that you want that on the ps4. You're going to have to
The time and effort involved in doing that is incredible. So i'm with you at some point
I don't think it's going to be soon because if it were profitable to leave the last generations behind
They'd already be doing it
Because that's what a lot of companies care about now is profit margins
So if it isn't profitable if it was profitable, it would already be done
So it's not happening anytime soon
But it is becoming more and more frequent these delays and these issues with developers on having to keep having to
You go as slow as you go as fast as your slowest person
So and and we are going as fast as the ps4 can go
Which is annoying
Have you seen fortnite now?
Oh, yeah, I know I know look at this. This is fortnite right and they're doing unreal engine. Yeah, this is fortnite
This is real in game
That's in game. Yeah, look at that. Oh, yeah, it's cool
That this is what we're looking at with unreal engine. This is a creative tool someone made this in game
Someone made this in game. Yeah, that's made
In game. Yeah, my tiktok's filled with them. It's mental. Yeah. Yeah, the games are going batshit crazy capability of that
And there's a limit though. There is a limit to that as there's no limit
With a lot of shit in that the graphics can only reach a certain point and your your eyes won't be able to fucking
Deal with any better
But it is getting fucking silly unreal engine 5 is something else man
That shit is fucking mega. We ain't even seen the start of that shit yet
It's fucking crazy and then you got a ps5 that can run 8k
But there's they're fucking there's no games that can run that yet. The the tailies for 8k are too expensive
So you imagine you got an 8k setup and games that are 8k that shit's gonna look fucking mental
I can't wait for it. But yeah
eventually
in the next couple of years the
Previous generation will get left behind and I think it's coming
I think it's coming sooner than that because it's been two three years since ps5 and series x have come out and normally the
Generation would have been the the gap the gap would have been bridged a little bit by now
But because of shortages and kovin and stuff it's been extended and what what happens with with the nintendo switch?
I don't know because that's a different entity into itself an enigma of his own that it's a different console
I think obviously you've got things like the steam deck and then there's other rivals to the steam deck
I can't remember the names exactly so I won't try and butcher it
But you so you have you have the nintendo switch extremely good at battery life
You have the steam deck extremely good graphically battery life is awful
There must be a happy medium for those two things to be fucking pushed together. The steam deck is heavy
It's big the switch is light. It's smaller than the steam deck. It lasts longer graphically. It cannot keep up with the steam deck
Hardware is better in the steam deck than it is in the switch, but the switch is way more user-friendly
So nintendo they are they there must be a way for them to in court to take inspiration from
valve
and have a beefed up vert that I feel like
if if nintendo want to continue in the market of
Of being able to play the same games that you can on other consoles, but not make that that make their main thing
I don't think a customer base will be happy with having to deal with six seven eight month delays
For a game
You see what would you rather have another console come out?
That's going to cost you another three four hundred quid but the same games that are coming out on a ps5
You'll be able to play the thing is with the switch and I want to be disrespectful to anyone here
but I think if people people that have only got a nintendo switch are
People that are happy to just have a nintendo switch
People that have got playstations are just happy to have a playstation
Yeah, but they might have a nintendo switch as well
Like if you if you're going to pick a console and you just pick a nintendo switch, I think you're either a child
No, i'm not being rude or because this isn't meant to be rude or you like the games that are on there already
Because they are mario zelda and um
All they've got very unique games and they're great at what they do, but you're happy to have that nintendo have their demographic
They have their target audience and they and they execute it extremely well
So I don't think people are going to be too fussed. Whereas like yeah people that want harry potter
Probably won't just have a nintendo switch
Nintendo is not if if the nintendo switch was designed
And nintendo's idea was to run the exact same games that you can run on any other console. It would already be doing it
And that that would be that obviously that is not the intention of the nintendo switch
It is an innovative console and runs
Like we say a different enigma to fucking playstation xbox or or the pc
Fucking whatevers
um
But I I just think the
I just think the
Yeah, it's a weird one because it can run certain games on for different consoles. How the fuck can I run the witcher man?
That's massive. I'm not being funny. No man's sky on there as well, but
The nintendo switch are just nintendo in general. They're geniuses. They know exactly what they're doing
They've got the best-selling console this generation last generation nintendo switch outsold them all
Be that helped by covid or not. It's still massive
um, they know they don't need to a panda to anyone's thing because they they'll do what they want and if and if
Something don't work it don't work, but they will keep doing it the way they want to do it
They do what they want and they do it. Well, it would just it would just be nice there
It's just I there there has to be another iteration. There has to be something
I'd love a nintendo switch that was like as powerful as a playstation 5 or xbox or a pc
I'd love it because what you could do with pokemon on that or zelda on that would be nuts. You can't tell me that zelda
Tears of the kingdom isn't being held back isn't going to be held back by nintendo switch
What you've got is things like the steam deck obviously the hardware in them is mega for what it is
But because of that as I previously said it's heavy the fan noise is loud
For for a child the steam deck is not user friendly. It's not it's not a kid's console
And for the nintendo switch it is a lot more streamlined. It isn't loud
It is easy to hold it is more maneuverable. The battery life is lasts a lot longer
So the the technology is there but being able to incorporate that into a handheld device that holds the same sort of
Quality of life as a nintendo switch. It just isn't there yet
You can't have a steam deck. You can't have a nintendo switch version of a steam deck as powerful without without
without taking away some of the quality of life and the um
How it sounds and runs and things like that
You just can't do it yet, but I feel like nintendo is the company that would be able to do that
Now like I say with the nintendo switch
I think what i'm trying to say is or was trying to say is you if you're going to buy one console
You're buying nintendo switch for the games that you know that they're going to pump out
You're not buying a nintendo switch thinking
Oh wonder if harry potter might come out on this or gta might come out this you're buying it
Because you know mario's coming out. You know pokemon's coming out. You know zelda's coming out
You know that nintendo make the games that you like if you're like me
You'll have a playstation or an xbox because of certain games and you'll have a nintendo switch because
You're a massive gamer. You're a nerd and you like pokemon zelda and all that and you can only get them on that
If you're buying just a nintendo switch, I believe as I say you're either a child that likes them games or
Parents see that as a more child-friendly console, which it is
Um, or you're on the move a lot and you get you you got a lot of downtime to play
Um, or you could free up the telly for your partner so they can think well you can play your games
And then don't forget we're in a different world as well. You go you go over to places like china
Oh, yeah, japan's max. Xenoblade chronicles. It's huge. That game's fucking massive splatoon
massive massive
Nintendo exclusive games that we aren't we don't even fucking know about
You know what I mean? We we we aren't in that world
So although it may sound like we're talking down on the switch. We definitely aren't and understand that this console is fucking huge
Massive, it's just I for one i'm not in that world. Obviously I get involved with it quite a bit because of stef
She's she's she's definitely taught me a hell of a lot about about the switch and nintendo as a company
But I just I just would love to see and I feel like it is it is inevitable that that they will have to
have a
A bulkier version of whatever whatever it be
You can't just have the nintendo switch as it is and then that's it whether they bring out another console entirely
There will be something and i'm excited for that to to see what it is because it will be something
The nintendo switch is good at what it does and and as I say if there's games like the witcher coming out and stuff
That's all good doom and all that but if you've got a playstation xbox and a nintendo or one or the other
And the witcher comes out you're not going to buy the witcher for the switch
Because it's not going to run very well or as well as the console unless you're happy to play it
Running around if doom comes out and you've got the choice you're going to buy it unless you want to play it on your
Or handheld mode you're not going to choose to buy it on the switch
You know and like I say unless you are going to sit around playing it
But for me, I don't like I like playing games. There's certain games I can play handheld, but I wouldn't want to play a
massive rpg
Like on a little handheld i'd want to play that on the telly or a monitor. Yeah
So I like to say but then there's different strokes for different folks. Everyone's different. I love the switch. I think it's fantastic
But we need to wrap this up. Well, I need a piss and we've been going off for ages
We haven't even fucking took the piss out. We've had a really serious podcast. This has been a serious
Bums willies and poo poo
Lots of little things and goo goo gargas and all that type of shit
There's a fucking silliness to be fair the first minute of this episode
I said the word cunt which had cunt more times in this episode than the entire pod and fuck you rich
Because he said he put the podcast on the other day and he said you said hello cunts and he turned it straight off
Why I don't know considering he drops the cunt
Is he the one that kicked off because we were swearing in front of his kids?
No, he just says it's too much swearing but the kids definitely don't listen to us
That's why it's marked as fucking explicit rich if you don't want to listen to it lad and don't fucking listen
He doesn't even let his kids have mcdonald's
Uh, why why what for is that he just feeds them apples and pears and stuff to be fair
That's probably way more beneficial for the children. It's 100% but let the kids have a triple cheese, man
Yeah, triple cheeseburgers the goat they're fucking sick. Oh, they're the best burgers. I haven't had a mcdonald's for a while, man
It's the only thing I like now from mcdonald's
I'm on nights for the next two weeks and we always have triple cheeseburgers every night banging that triple cheese
I have one every night. I'm pissed off that it isn't in a meal though. You have to buy it all separately
But fuck it. It's worth it. Fuck it. I need a piss. All right. See you later. Oh