30 degrees, and I feel like a candle. Melting
candle. I've never sweated so much in my life.
It's horrible. You stink. I stink. I actually
haven't smelt you, but I'm going to assume you
saying you stink means you stink. I'm making
myself feel sick, so I definitely smell. Proper
sweaty gamers. I love it. Yuck. You just won
a tenner. Well, yeah, technically. Google Play
Points, boss. Boss. Yeah, pop that. Bit of the
old mobile gaming. Yeah. We know what that's
going on? No. Yeah? Yeah? You do? Yeah. What
are you going to spend it? Oh, could be... Go
on. Could be Into the Gungeon. Mobile version
just came out. Yeah. Bang that out on the PlayStation
over 100 hours, probably 200 hours on that. Into
the Gungeon? Into the Gungeon. Why have I never
heard of that? Yeah, that's got a couple of hundred
hours on PlayStation for me. There it is, Enter
the Gungeon. Just come out on mobile yesterday,
funnily enough, and the full version is about
eight quid, so I could go on that. Or it could
go on Warhammer Tacticus, the next battle pass.
A bullet hell roguelike video game developed
by American studio Dodge Roll and published by...
Set in the firearms themed Gungeon. Gameplay
follows several player characters called Gungeonies
as they traverse procedurally generated rooms
to find a gun that can kill the past. I nearly
platinumed that game. Yeah? Not far off of finishing.
Why was it nearly and not fully? Some of the
last things I've got to do are very, you know.
Tedious. No, they're just RNG. If they don't
appear, I can't do it. Ah, I see. Yeah, one of
them. That's quite cool. Yeah, it's a very cool
game. I played a bit of it on my phone yesterday
to see how I liked it, and I thought, do I want
to start it from the very beginning? I'm actually
playing a game on my phone, and I'm quite addicted
to it at the moment. It is called, why don't
you just tell me what the game is? Metal Storm.
Never heard of it. It's basically fighter jets.
Nice. Dogfighting. Nice, love that. But it's
quite intuitive, quite easy to play, quite arcadey.
And I'm really good at it. I can't work out if
I'm playing against bots or not because some
of the names that I'm playing against are very
like, that's not a bot. You know what I mean?
Yeah. So I'm quite liking it. I like it. That's
about as far. Is there any point asking if you've
played anything different to last week? I have,
yeah. Have you? You have? I played something
yesterday. Yeah? Yeah. Go on. Battlefield 6 beta
yesterday, baby. That's not different at all.
Did I play it last week? I didn't tell... I hadn't
played it this time last week. Oh, you didn't
play it, did you? No. You know what? I was quite
conscious because I was like... Obviously, every
time we do a podcast... upload it, all that bollocks.
And I was like, I hate it when it looks like,
so episode 142, Battlefield 6, and then a plethora
of other things, Warhammer being one of them.
Episode 143, Battlefield 6, Rogue Trader again.
And then 144, Battlefield 6. However, I feel
so, so my internal monologue sits there and thinks,
People might be sick of Battlefield. We're not,
is the truth of it. We're not sick of Battlefield.
This is weekend number two of Battlefield 6.
I didn't realise that it was also early access
included, so I could have played it yesterday.
Yeah, four days of it. 14, 15, 16, 17. Yeah,
I fucked it up. I was going to text you. I thought,
nah, he knows. No, I didn't know. I thought it
was just for last week. You'd be running. Yeah,
no, it's ridiculous. So I now know. Soz about
that. So that means that I can play it again.
I'll quickly go over it and then come back. But
really difficult time for me because of the whale
season. I mean, Raid come out on Wednesday. Is
it bad? I just need to get out of this clothes.
So trying to balance the two is quite a fucker.
But what do you think? Because you didn't play
it last week. I love it. Because you told me
I'm not going to play it. I can even soundbite
that. You told us that you ain't going to play
it because, number one, because none of your
progression carries over. And number two, because
you know you're going to buy it regardless. So
therefore, you weren't going to bother playing
it. So what's the sudden change of heart? You
can also soundbite the bit where it said there's
loads of things to unlock in the main game. And
I was like, oh yeah, I like stuff. So I'm doing
the challenges. What do you mean? Well, it's
stuff that you can unlock that when you get the
game, it unlocks by playing the beta. oh is there
yeah yeah there's challenges so skins and shit
oh so I had I done I finished one yesterday which
was fucking long it was get 300 spots yeah yeah
yeah I don't even know what the button is to
spot stuff no you don't there isn't one you just
have to look at them ah through the scope what
as a recon yeah that's a problem I don't play
recon yeah but I've hacked it I found a fucking
cheat go on I just, I was doing it properly for
fucking ages and I was getting like three a game
or something. It was just so long. I'm never
going to do this. So I went on the fucking little
TDM game mode, didn't I? Got one of them little
fucking hacking, recon -y, drone -y things. Drones,
yeah. Just whacked that on the floor. in like
a place where there's going to be enemies and
hide in a bathroom. And I just did that fucking
for ages and it was just done it in about four
games. So I've unlocked a ghillie suit skin.
That's cool. And now I can actually play the
game properly because I was just doing that to
get that. Yeah. But no, I have played a couple
of games with the assault rifle. I fully agree
in what you're saying. It's fucking hard. I feel
like I'm shooting people as much as they're shooting
me and I'm dying. Yeah. I think the hit rate
has just been off a little bit, man. I've hit
people with a sniper relatively close in the
head multiple times and they've just not even
been touched. And I know there's like the fucking
zero in the distances and shit like that. But
yeah, not at that distance. Because a straight
headshot kills him as well. There's no reviving,
you're done. And I think it's a bit cheeky that
you've got people running at you around the corner
and you're hitting one in the chest from a sniper.
like fucking 20 metres away, and they're like,
yeah, sweet. Yeah, yeah. But I can shotgun someone
from that range, and they're toast. Yeah, it's
not enough to kill them. It's a fucking 50 -cal
bullet, mate, going through your chest. Yeah,
it's just absolutely perforated through your
chest. But you're sweet, yeah. Yeah, you're all
right. You're sweet, yeah. You're down to a third
of your health, and then you can heal yourself
back up. Yeah, you just slide along and pistol
me sick. How's the... You know what? I saw a
graph that compared all the movement between
every single battlefield, and this is the slowest.
movement that Battlefield has been. Which is
odd because it definitely doesn't feel like that.
And one thing that I'm really enjoying whenever
I do jump on it is just playing the fucking objective.
But is that because I'm so shit at getting kills?
Because when I look at the leaderboard and I
see some fucker at top who's got like 60 something
kills and I think, how? How are you doing that?
How has that happened? And I'm sat there with
two. But what you'll notice is that they're fucking
near the top and so is my ass because what am
I doing? I'm reviving motherfuckers and I'm running
for the objectives and I'm doing exactly what
I'm supposed to be doing during the game. I like
the fact that you can just fucking go anywhere
pretty much. All the buildings you can go in.
Yesterday I jumped up on a car, jumped up a railing
into a building but the door wouldn't open so
I was in a building and the top floor through
a window I smashed but there was no other way
up there. So I was sweet. I looked out the window.
I heard the window next to me smash. Fucking
enemy jumped in next to me. Decent. He started
doing the little crouchy thing. So I did the
little crouchy thing back and I shot his fucking
head off. Yeah. Because I want that kill. Yeah.
We're not friends, mate. He thought we were going
to shoot out the window. Yeah, no chance. No
chance. You're red. You're dead. Exactly. So
yeah, that happened. But yeah, I love all that.
I just love... Because I was playing a map yesterday.
I played it twice in a row. And I come back on
it and I was like, is this the same map? But
obviously it is because when I was playing it,
the area I was in was completely different because
everyone had blown up the fucking building houses,
front of the houses. It's just a crazy shit.
I did actually clip something just there. I can't
remember what it was, so I'll carry on talking
while I'm looking. Yeah. Have you fucked around
with any of the other classes, like medic or
engineer? Only the assault rifle one and the
sniper. I haven't done either of the other. No,
you haven't run around with the old paddles.
Nah. That's another thing, Battlefield 6 players.
Fucking revive people, man. No, no, no, no, no,
no, no. No, no, you're wrong. You're wrong in
what you're saying. Okay. You said Battlefield
6 players. They're not Battlefield players. They're
COD players. Right, well, whoever is playing
Battlefield 6, revive people, bruv. COD players
are playing Battlefield 6. The amount of people
that I'm shooting are... Absolute pussies. ...three
metres away and they just walk past you. Yeah.
There's no one here. Res me, man. Don't be a
dick. Just pick me up. I know it takes five seconds,
but just pick me up. I'm not even a fucking medic
and I'm reviving people, bruv. Do you know what
I mean? What I need to do as the medic is...
Because I'm... I'm quite lethal at running around
with the defibs and just literally... But I always
forget that obviously you've got a much quicker
revive when you go and grab someone. So I very
rarely actually pick someone up. I always swap
out from the gun to the defib and just zap them
because it's instant. But I need to get into
a habit of running over to someone and grabbing
them because the animations for it is quite cool
as well. Oh, I love it. You pick them up and
then just fucking stab them. So fun. I much much
prefer it to 2042 so far the amount of people
on my friends list that are now playing 2042
is funny yeah they're just like battlefield man
just go yeah I nearly spent a lot of money um
and I'm talking like 300 quid the other day just
because I was sitting there thinking, well, I
need to buy Battlefield 6, right? So I need to
do that. That's probably the best part of a one
-er. That's true. Might even buy the one -er
edition because I'm a knob. And also, FIFA comes
out in a couple of weeks and obviously I buy
FIFA because I'm a knob and that's what I do.
So that's another 100 quid and I also need a
new controller. You're going to buy it? You're
going to get the new FIFA, yeah? Yeah, man. I've
got to carry on my Ipswich player, don't I? Was
it Ipswich? I can't remember who I was. Was I
Ipswich? No, you weren't Ipswich. Who the fuck
was I? A Portsmouth. Portsmouth, that's wonderful.
Pompey, play up. Pompey, Pompey, play up. Here
we go. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. Why did
I click this? Let's have a look, shall we? Here
I am laying in a bush doing nothing. I'm just
getting loads of marks. Are you going to show
me or are you just going to monologue over what's
actually there? Oh, yeah, it was just a... Yeah,
yeah, it's just Beamsville, isn't it? Yeah, have
a look at that. What is it, snipers? Nah, nah,
nah, not sniping. I had much cooler clips than
this. Yeah, yeah. It looks so good, doesn't it?
Oh, I know the area you're in. Bang, bang. that
fucking little jeep, just shot the geyser out,
the gunner seat of the car, and it just looks
so sick, the way he like, ragdoll out the top
of it, the geyser driving is obviously in third
person view, so he's just going to see his gunner
fall out, and then yeah, I've been in a tank,
I haven't shot anything, but I've been in a tank,
when we've been getting shot at, I've tried to
stick a few C4s on the old, on the old tanks,
and I used to love doing that on Battlefield
4, running out, fucking C4ing them up and that,
it's just nice, I just like, that's, because
I'm, Not good at first -person shooters anymore.
I've never been great, but the actual reaction
speed is shit. Yeah, because you're quite old.
Correct. Crusty, wrinkly. Exactly right. Slightly
overweight. Much more than slightly these days.
Just genuinely quite far gone. If you was a pack
of ham, you'd probably be in the bin. Well out
of date. Not even returnable. It's quite rough
to see, really, because I've known you quite
a while. I'm sad to see. Yeah, yeah. Carry on.
Yeah, so I like to go for the objectives. You
know what I mean? I'm not good at fucking close
quarters combat anymore. So I give myself a sense
of achievement if I'm like, right, I'll look
at a map and I'll find it. I'll go to the objectives.
I'll be like, I like B. Yeah, yeah. So that's
my goal. Yeah, I'm getting B. B is mine for the
game though. Oh, you stay there the whole time?
Oh, I'll capture it. Yeah, and then? And then
I'll defend it. And then if I die, I keep going
back. That's something that I never do. I always
capture and disperse. Yeah, but then that B still
needs to stay yours, right? So I just have it
in my head that I'll pick a point that I like.
And I'm staying. And that's mine. My mission
in this game is to just hold that down. And then
what will be, will be. But whether there's 12
people on there or there's fucking one, I'll
just keep going back and trying to get it back.
What a fantastic way to play. Because that's
the objective. mindset of a battlefield player
that is that is even if there's no one there
fantastic because i'm defending yeah my life's
easy this is exactly because do you don't you
get points for sitting in a defense yeah i think
so you definitely get more points if you kill
someone while we're in the defense or shooting
at them as well yeah yeah it's just that's just
you're still doing your part yeah you might be
camping so to speak but you're camping for a
reason because your team needs a subjective yeah
I wouldn't even say that it's camping you're
defending yeah you're defending an objective
or what me and Clark you like to call it in Call
of Duty tactically waiting yeah a tactical wait
in a house with a gun aimed at a point from a
window yeah hide him what you would say is a
vantage point tactically waiting at a vantage
point so that's the way I play so yeah that's
my battlefield I'm getting in it I can't wait
there's a compass now in the HUD Yeah, there's
a server browser as well, apparently. That's
cool. I didn't look at it. I know people wanted
it. Yeah, they added that in. I want to switch
the compass on because it looks quite cool. It
looks very clean. I'm not a massive fan of the
map. The map's great, but the little mini -map,
UAV thing, where you see the other players, I
find it hard to tell what the enemies are and
where they are because they keep popping up as
red and then there's little arrows on them, but
it's really finicky to see. But I love that when
you hover over them on the map, you can see like
a snapshot of where they are, like a screen of
their view. Do you know what I mean? So you can
see what they're doing. I always think that's
quite cool is when you die and you're waiting
to respawn. And then, yeah, when you're hovering
over someone who is a spawn point, someone in
your squad or whatever. And then, yeah, you can
see exactly what they're up to, who they're killing,
what they're doing. I like all of that shit.
It's quite cool. So, yeah, definitely getting
it. That's all I have to say on the game. Who
isn't getting it? Do you know how many clips?
Obviously, my Instagram's just filled with Battlefield
clips. And I love that it went from ages ago
when the trailer come out and all those people,
including ourselves, sitting there going, no
pre -orders. Remember. You remember what they
did to us. We ain't pre -ordering this. And now,
every single person is going, I've already bought
it. I've already bought it. And then the few
people that sit there and they go, No pre -orders,
remember? And then just the stream of comments
underneath them going, it's too late. I've already
given in. I don't care. It's already happened.
I'm going to be one of them. Yeah. Well, this
is the problem though, isn't it? Well, not the
problem, but they learnt their lesson. The product
was shit. This is much better. This is Battlefield.
The other one was not Battlefield. In the state
that it is as beta, if you were to clean up some
of the bugs, of which I've met very few, and
release this now as a full game with all the
maps and all the modes and all the skins and
everything like that, I would be satisfied. Because
you know it's going to keep pumping out stuff.
It's not just done, is it? And I feel like if
you're at that point in the beta and so many
people are enjoying it, then we're good to go.
We're locked and loaded. As I always said, I
just think the time frame for 2042 is just shit
as well. 2042 is like you either need to go far
future or you need to go like World War I. You
can't go like 10, 15. It's just weird. Yeah,
yeah. What are you on about? Go fucking sci -fi
or don't. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So it's just grounded fucking military objective
-based combat. Great. And let's hope they keep
it that theme. So if they are going to do like
crossovers, it's going to be things like fucking,
I don't know, Terminator and not fucking... uh
fucking i don't think they'll bother doing crossovers
like that but they said they they said that if
they're gonna do like skins and stuff it's gonna
be like military themed yeah so you know as long
as they're slight i don't know bruce willis die
hard or anything that's not fucking you know
spongebob squarepants or whatever the fuck they'd
cod put in these days Battlefield 6 developers
are prioritising a grounded and authentic approach
to cosmetic skins focusing on military themed
looks rather than the over the top crossover
skins seen in games like Call of Duty. They want
skins to feel like they belong in the Battlefield
universe and are emphasising class identification
with unique identifiers. While some more extravagant
skins might be present, they will not be as outlandish
as those found in other games. Yeah, which I
think is... exactly what you and then yeah class
identification skins will help players easily
identify different classes with unique identifiers
for each class e .g. free antennas for the recon
class yeah and the ghillie skin that I've unlocked
or whatever and then no crossovers they are voiding
goofy crossover skins like those seen in other
games at least at launch while the initial focus
is on grounded skins the developers acknowledge
that the future might bring more diverse options
Battlefield Battlefield 6 will feature a Battle
Pass, microtransactions, and a Battlefield Pro
Token system similar to Call of Duty's Black
Cell, according to a video by some YouTuber.
In short, Battlefield 6 is prioritizing a more
realistic and authentic aesthetic for its skins
compared to some other popular shooters. Because
that's what I think a lot... It's weird, man,
because you've got that... It's very difficult
to talk about it without... seeming like you're
just slagging a player base off. But it's almost
like the people that are more interested in Battle
Royale games. How do I word it? Kids play Fortnite
more than they do Apex Legends. Probably. H1Z1.
Fucking PUBG. Yeah. You're more likely to have
a child. I say a child, a teenager, whatever,
a young adult, want to pick up something like
Fortnite than PUBG. Because you can be toxic
and dance on people. You can dance on people
and there's cool skins. And that's not taking
anything away from the skins. I want to emphasise,
even with Call of Duty, the skins and everything,
I enjoy them. I like them. The setting... said
Skittons is what I don't enjoy and when it comes
to something like I think Fortnite you do whatever
the fuck you want that's a universe where you
can be Spongebob you know what I mean that's
absolutely fine in Call of Duty when I'm in Baghdad
Spongebob Squarepants doesn't belong I think
that should be I think that should be an acceptable
statement I don't want to be Spongebob Squarepants
with an AK -47 yeah well you look at Battlefield
and you go this is fucking gorgeous for a fucking
war torn war zone yeah Because it's disgusting.
Yeah. But it's fucking beautiful. And if you
see a really colourful thing, you're going to
be like, that is ridiculous. That makes absolutely
no sense. I remember I actually had some fun
with 2042 and it was with you. And I remember
exactly where it was. I don't know what the map
was. Actually, yes, I do. It was the one with
like the big fucking Trump wall in between. And
then there was like a building in the desert
thing. no oh shit i know the one you're on about
and then it had like rocks and mountains on one
side and then the gardens we kept going to them
rocks and mountains man and getting kills bruv
we were getting mad kills and then the other
side from them rocks and mountains was like a
big tower you can zip up and stuff yeah i loved
that but the problem was with that is that we
did that map 15 times in a row And it was just
no way about it. You just did it because you
quit and you get chucked back in the same fucking
lobby. There's just no way around it. I had fun
in that game. But once again, yesterday, there's
like geezers shooting me out a window. I've got
a sniper rifle. There's not really much I can
do. So what do I do? I go underneath him, chuck
a couple C4 on the floor below him. Boom, the
whole fucking front of the building falls down.
That's just epic, man. You know what I mean?
That's just so cool. I don't know if he died
or not, but it looked fucking good. And I might
have even killed myself in the rubble. I don't
know. Who cares? It was great. It was fun. It
was great. And that's what it's about, man. I
can't wait. This is what Battlefield 2042 should
have been. And this is what Battlefield... My
first foray into Battlefield was Battlefield
4. And I still maintain that might be the funnest
time I've ever had in a multiplayer game. Yeah,
agreed. Because Battlefield 2042 wasn't... it
wasn't a bad game i think it just it it was one
of those where everyone was so incredibly hyped
to play it and the trailers and everything were
immense so everyone was so excited and then it
come out and it was fantastic for a short while
and then it just it just disintegrated there
wasn't there wasn't enough content being added
like you said that The map variety was non -existent.
You were playing the same maps over and over
and over again. There were bugs. And it just
fell short. But for the time that we were playing
it, for the month that we were playing it, amazing.
Loved it. Especially those first two weeks. I
was like, this is fucking sick. And I found my
class. It was the one where we had the wingsuit.
I can't remember what it was. And you could fly
around and shit like that. And it was a very,
very fun game. But like you say, Dropping into
the same map every single time and then playing
exactly the same way, doing the same things and
having the same outcome. No destruction, man.
That's the big one for me. No destruction. You
ain't got destruction on Battlefield. But the
destruction in Battlefield 6 is fantastic. It's
so good because it makes you think in a way that
is destructive. And I've done it. Someone's in
a building and like you just said, I can't get
to them. So I'm going to take the building. I'm
going to take the building away from you, or
at least the front of it. You're hiding behind
a door. The door goes. If I can't get you, I'm
getting the door. That is exactly, or like I
said last week, where there was a literal door
in front of me, and all I had was an RPG. I sent
the RPG through it, got rid of the door, and
now we can all go through. Isn't that nice? And
it's the fact that that stays how it is. which
makes it even more fun. There's just craters
and shit everywhere. You can lay down and use
a crater in the floor for cover that was created
by an explosion. That's dynamic. That's like
real Warzone shit. That's how the combat should
be in them sort of games. I'm gobsmacked no one's
done it other than Battlefield. Battlefield 4,
I was a COD gamer. Not really, but I used to
like COD. I used to play a lot of COD. Back when
COD was really good, though. And Clarky was always
going on about it. I think he played Battlefield
Bad Company 2 or something. He was like, this
is great. Then Battlefield 4 came out and he
was banging on about that. I was like, oh, I'll
fucking give it a go. And then I played it and
it was the first multiplayer game other than
COD 4, I think, that I would consistently just
play on my own for hours and hours and hours.
And I absolutely fucking loved it. And me and
Clarky had a lot of competition because there
was a Battlefield app as well. And we'd have
a competition of who could get the furthest snipe.
And we were going stupid, mate. I mean, like
2 ,000 metres and stuff where you can't even...
You'd shoot and then it'd be like three seconds.
And you'd be like, oh, fuck. You'd go on the
app, it hasn't updated yet. I've beat it, I've
beat it by like three metres and that. And we
just kept going for so long on that game. And
yeah, just great fucking memories. So far, you
can't even see the person. I used to have so
many clips on my PS4, which I haven't got anymore.
Same. I think they're actually on my Facebook
from years ago. And that's the only trace of
them I've got where I used to love being a sniper,
man. Absolutely love it. But I would, I'd never
like zero in the scope or anything like that.
I'd just stick with the default. And so you just
have me aiming all the way up and just. sending
it and um exactly that i've definitely got i
don't know how far it was but i have a clip where
you can't even see what is there and all and
the only i think the only reason i knew someone
was there was because they were shooting at me
and it was just a case of who's gonna get who
first and it was always a headshot yeah it was
never never a body shot or anything like it was
always always lying down both of you were lying
down yeah and then you're like all right yeah
fuck is it my turn yeah it's great it's mad I
love it I absolutely love it it zooms in on their
red body like miles away I mean there's a problem
at the moment with the beta where there's just
every fuckers being a recon so you've just got
snipers everywhere but at the same time that's
what that's the freedom of choice you can do
whatever you want sniping in that game is not
fucking easy no it's hard so when someone bangs
me I'm like respect because that's fucking tough
I haven't I say I want to actually play like
an infantry I just want to be running around
with an AR and shit and see because I have done
it a couple of times but I haven't really give
it much time a day but now I've done the sniping
challenge I can just fuck about and I just wanted
that skin but yeah that's should we stop talking
about Battlefield otherwise this will be the
whole episode it's the best day of the year by
the way why if you're unaware because football
season is back today yeah officially first game
first Premier League game tonight I think it's
Liverpool versus somebody Liverpool versus Bournemouth.
Who's West Ham player? We've got Sunderland tomorrow.
Oh. Yeah, I know. We're going to lose because
it's the first game of the season. They've just
come up. I hope they have just come up. And I'm
at my mate's barbecue, so I'm going to get laughed
out of the house. Do you reckon, yeah? If we're
2 -0 down by half -time, I'm going home. Where's
your faith? Where's your... West Ham family.
Very little of it. My dreams, they fade and die.
Fortune is always hiding. So, yeah, I'm very
excited that the football season's back. I'm
very, very, very excited that the football season's
back. Did you play any of the beta with FIFA?
What do you mean? I swear there was a beta with
FIFA 26. EAFC 26. Sorry, EAFC 26. There is no
beta for FIFA, no. No? There was trailers, the
gameplay reveal and carrier mode reveal, but...
It's football, man. Has much changed other than
the fucking teams? I don't play fucking ultimate
team no more, so I just play fucking career mode.
They finally put some stuff in career mode like,
I don't know, just football nerd shit that makes
it more appealing. Do you know what I mean? You
can look back previous seasons, people's stats
and stuff. Stuff like that matters, you know
what I mean? So more cut scenes, more fucking
storylines. It's almost like a football manager
type. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaking of football
manager, Football Manager 26 actually put a mini
trailer out the other day saying, you know, it's
coming. Because people were just like, it doesn't
even exist at this point. And interestingly,
they put out a trailer. It didn't show nothing,
but the match day coming soon. But it's in like,
the match engine looked like fucking FIFA. So
I don't know if they've just, because they've
had like two years to work on this. And they
said they were going to rebuild the game from
the ground up for the first time since fucking
day dot. So I'm excited to see what the fuck.
I'm worried. as well because if they've gone
too stupid with a match engine, I'm not sure
how fucking much. What do you mean by stupid?
Well, if it's gone too fucking graphically heavy,
it's going to make it really hard to run because
Football Manager is quite slow in general because
the amount of data in it is insane. Yeah. So
sometimes you need a bit of a powerful bit of
kit to run it. But if they've beefed up the match
engine something crazy, it's going to be like...
It's going to be mental. I don't even know if
computers are going to be running it smooth or
not. But we ain't seen it yet. We'll have to
wait and see what they're coming out with. move
to Unity Engine FIFA Manager 26 will be the first
football manager title to run on the Unity Engine
promising significant graphical upgrades and
more realistic player movements and animations
the game will feature a fully licensed Premier
League including updated squads kits and stadium
details I didn't know that that's the first time
they've done that according to allkeyshop .com
introduction of women's football Tactical revamp.
Expect new player roles and customisation options
for formations. Players will have more control
over how their team plays both in and out of
possession. Enhanced match day experience. Sports
Interactive is aiming for a more immersive and
visually rich experience, promising more fluid
player movements, organic reactions and detailed
stadiums. A leaked file from FMDB website. I
suggest the possibility of over 40 new or renamed
player roles offering even more tactical depth.
Normally, the only game I've ever modded is you
have to import all the player faces, badges for
clubs, kids. It doesn't come to PlayStation.
No, it's PC, isn't it? Or Xbox as well. Well,
yeah, they've got, like, console editions, but
they're not the same. They're always, like, dumbed
-down versions of them. Hopefully, this one's
going to be more fucking... Hopefully, it ain't
going to be like that, and they are going to
be more... Football Manager 25 was cancelled.
Yeah. Due to not meeting the quality standards
the developers aimed for, with a focus shifting
to ensure FM26 delivers a polished experience.
Because they always... They've always released
their games in November. Got to fucking November
last year. And they were like, nah, it's not
coming. We need until February. And then it was
like, oh, we need a bit longer. And it was like,
well, by the time you release this game, the
season's going to be over. Everything needs updating.
So they, yeah, just went, we'll just wipe that
one clear. So they've had two years to work on
this. It's going to be a madness. Yeah, FM25
is a major leap forward for the series, promising
a more immersive and visually rich experience
than ever before. The introduction of women's
football and the move to the Unity engine are
particularly anticipated features, given the
cancellation of FM25 to ensure a higher quality
product. That'd be quite weird, though. What?
Like, if you've got... You've got a whole roster
where you are one of those games where you just
release one every single year because it follows
a season and then just not having one. And then
when someone questions it, they go, yeah, because
we were really shit. So that season we weren't
able to do because we really fucked it. But then
they were rebuilding the entire game. Yeah, I'd
imagine moving it to an entirely different engine
is quite different. Can you imagine the amount
of players on there? And when you click on a
player like Mark Noble, age height stats place
of birth fucking people that he's played with
trophies that he's won clubs he's played for
numbers of appearances like the list goes on
and that's just for one player and they do that
across every player in world football that is
known and now they're doing it with women can
you imagine and them stats have to be updated
and seem realistic there's football managers
Sky Sports last year, year before. And they've
used Football Manager to scout players for stats.
Oh, because it's got all the... Because it's
so accurate. It's so fucking accurate. They can
pull out wonder kids that people don't even know
about at the moment. And you're like, wow, this
kid's good. This 17 -year -old from Brazil in
Flamengo. And then you Google him and be like,
oh, yeah, no, he is really good. I've never heard
of him before. It's mental. I don't know how
they do it. They've got scouts in every single
fucking club and country in the world. It's amazing.
The game also allows players to see data presented
as graphs and pitch maps mirroring the ways in
which data analysts present their work to managers
in real life. Mostly the data is realistic and
strives for accuracy, but a few things have been
sacrificed in order to make the game more enjoyable.
The match engine, the giant computer underneath
alone, has two to three million lines of code,
which should already give you an idea of how
complex it is. Every attribute is used in the
ME, and most actions use at least... Match engine.
Oh, sorry, match engine. That's what it means,
I'm just saying. And most actions use at least
three to four attributes, whatever affects the
match engine. So think about shorter passes through
the middle on a muddy pitch, etc. Bloody, bloody,
blah, blah, blah. yeah so you've got you've got
22 players playing against each other they've
all got stats and then the match engine has to
create a realistic looking game of football using
them stats visually with the players and you
know have it like work against it it's incredible
to really sound so simple when you just think
of oh yeah it's just football you're not even
playing that's the go -to for people they've
never played football manager why do you want
to play you're not even playing but it's so much
better than any football game bro It'll eat your
fucking life. That's why I've always had to stay
away from it. The game includes a realistic financial
model requiring players to manage budgets, negotiate
contracts and handle club finances. Players can
nurture young talent through the youth academy,
developing the next generation of stars. It's
mad, isn't it? Everyone's got their story of
their own wonder kids that come through their
academy and then they went on to bang 30 goals
and win them the league. It's a crazy game. You
spent your entire budget on one star player only
for him to do his cruciate ligaments in pre -season
to be out for eight months. Everyone's got stories,
man. Great game. One of the best games ever made,
for sure. How much data is in Football Manager?
Let's see where that comes up. I don't want a
new tab. I'm not interested. Yeah, it's just,
it's a mad amount of detail. And like you say,
so every season, so it's almost like if you release
Football Manager 26, you've almost instantly
got to start working on Football Manager 27.
Because, so Football Manager 26 focuses on obviously
the last season in terms of stats and everything.
Well, yeah, but yeah, so I guess so. The current
player base of what they're at at the moment.
So the game will start. Is it up to date to the
point of the season just gone? Yeah, so the game
will start. If the game comes out November, the
game will start. You can choose when to start
really, but naturally it will probably start
in like June of this year. So before this season
begins and then you'll have the transfer window.
And all the players will still be where they
was at that time. Right. I see. I see. But they've
got like new things in where you can like update
it. So like any transfers that have happened
since the season started. It's almost like a
real time. Yeah. You can have it all like that.
Yeah. Fucking hell. It's a madness. So there'll
be people there that are just, I wonder how many
people they've got doing that. Just updating.
Yeah. Constantly. What do you think? The transfer
window's still open, mate. People are still moving
all over the place. So, it's a lot of fucking
shit to know and keep up with and change and
I don't even know how they do it. I thought transfer
windows, I don't really know much about it, but
I thought transfer windows stopped before the
season starts. I thought that was a whole point
of a window. Nah, nah, they used to and now it
goes like a month into the season. I don't know
when it ends nowadays. It changes all the time.
So, when that ends in terms of like moving to
another club, you can't, you're done. Yeah, kind
of. Or is that where the buyout clause is coming
in? No. No? No, it's just different countries
have different windows. So if a country's open,
windows open in another country, sometimes you
can still do the deal. And then it depends. If
you're a free agent, you can go anytime. And
there's all sorts of different fucking... Is
that if you're not part of a club? If you're
a free agent? Yeah, your contract's run out.
Like Mikel Antonio for West Ham, his contract's
run out. Does he still play for West Ham? No,
his contract's gone. He's a free agent. Anyone
can sign him. there's a whole world it's quite
funny to be honest because now he's on telly
saying there's no loyalty in football and it's
like well there is because you broke both your
legs last year in a car accident in a car that
you was driving and West Ham paid for your rehabilitation
and let you train at the club while you were
still under contract and still paid you all your
huge amount of wages while you wasn't fit to
play and now you've come to the end of your contract,
and they've still offered you a deal, but it
was a pay -as -you -play deal, so he gets like
six grand a week basic wage, but if he plays
just one minute... Oh, no, not six grand a week.
He gets like 100 grand a week if he makes like
one minute worth of appearance. If he comes on
as a sub in the 90th minute, he'll still make
100 grand. What, for that one... yeah so anytime
he appears on the pitch for West Ham he'd make
100 grand say fuck me so yeah but obviously that
deal wasn't good enough so he's like nah nah
I'm not I'm not gonna sign that because you know
I'm worth more than that but you're 35 years
old or something you've just broke both your
legs normally people at 35 or that around about
that age are starting to retire you still wanna
carry on fair play but you've just broke both
your legs which West Ham have rehabilitated you
for and still offered you a contract Very generously,
in my opinion. And you're saying there's no loyalty
in football. Well, hold on. Five, six years ago,
you wanted to go Chelsea. So, do you know what
I mean? We've hit a chord here. No, I just find
it a bit distasteful to leave a club you was
at for 10 years to then just go and badmouth
us all over TV. I was at West Ham for 10 years.
Yeah, about 10 years. Yeah, a long time. Yeah.
He's our top goal scorer in the league, which
is embarrassing. But more embarrassing for us
than him. Yeah. But, yeah, no law in football,
eh, Mikel? That's such a crazy amount of money,
isn't it? Stupid. Stupid. This is what I'm saying.
It's absolutely ridiculous. You're not happy
with six grand a week, dickhead? Six grand a
week. Not for his lifestyle. Let's have a look
at that. Six grand a week. Let's do the old.
Six, 12, 18, 24. 24 times 12. No, it'd be 52,
wouldn't it? You go by weeks. It's still 312
grand a year. Yeah, six, eight. 6, 12, 18, 24.
That's four weeks. That's 24 times 12. That's
what I just did to work out. Yeah, that's true.
Just saying. Well, no, 24 times 12 is 288. Yeah,
but so four weeks in a month. Yeah, but you don't
go by the months. If you're working out a salary,
you don't go by months. You don't go by months.
You go by weeks. You'd go by weeks. I was just
trying to get a ballpark figure. I didn't need
to fucking... Yeah, but then I just gave you
the actual figure. You want to be a football
manager, we're talking fucking contracts and
money, then someone needs to be the accountant
here. Can you come talk to me when you've took
Antwerp to a European final? Well, by the sounds
of it, I could have got us there quicker because
I know how to do the money more. Imagine that
from an account. I know how to do the money.
You can come and be the financial advisor. You
don't even fucking play it anymore. Pardon me,
I will. Antwerp's been left in the dirt. Yeah,
I know. I left that club and then couldn't find
a job, so I never went back on it. But you couldn't
actually find a job? I could, but... I thought
you had offers all over the place. You know when
you think you're too good for shit, like McAntonio,
funnily enough. Yeah, that's exactly it. It was
like, yeah, I was applying for Premier League
jobs. They were like, nah. I was like, fuck it.
And then Championship clubs were like, what about
us? No, no, no. But you had no coaching badges.
Yeah, but... But I took a club to European final.
Yeah, but you had no badges. Yes, I know. I had
a couple. So that could have been fluke. There's
no fluke. That's mad though, isn't it? So you
got to the absolute precipice. Didn't get what
you wanted. Basically, Antwerp called your bluff.
Because didn't you go in there and you went,
I want my badges or I'm gone. And they went,
see you then. Yeah, pretty much. I think they
were trying to call my bluff. Go then. Please
don't go. Off you go. Then you went, no, all
right, I'm fucking off. See you later. And then
everyone's gone, well, we don't need you. Well,
it turns out they didn't, did they? No, I can't
get a job. Well, go to the championship. Build
yourself back up. That file's dead now. That
story has ended. That is a rough one, though,
isn't it? Because it's not like you're at the
end of your career there either, in terms of
being a manager. That's probably the best file
I've ever done on Football Manager because I've
never done a... Because normally when you start,
you just go, I'll be West Ham. Yeah. Or I'll
be fucking, I don't know. Portsmouth. Yeah. Or
fucking Watford in the championship and just
go up one division to be in the Prem for fun.
Like, challenge to work up and then whatever.
But yeah, to actually just start unemployed and
get a job at fucking Dover Athletic and then
end up in China and then fucking Belgium. It
was great. Kids, we're moving. Because I say,
yeah, but the fact is, like, I'm learning. in
real life, what all the other divisions in the
world do. Because they're all different. They're
all different. You get clubs that are fucking...
You get divisions that have only got eight teams
in, divisions that have four people go up and
ten people go down. It's just madness. Drafts
in America. It's all crazy shit. Drafts. There's
a new rule, actually, that I only found out yesterday
that's coming. So, this is real, in real football.
So, as of now, if a goalkeeper... has the ball
in their hands for eight seconds, and then the
other team get a corner. What? Just to stop people
wasting time. Wasting time. So they just keep...
What always happens in football is... I mean,
how often does that happen? All the fucking time.
Because goalkeepers will jump on the ball, hold
it, and just take fucking like a minute, literally,
to kick the ball. So they'll get a booking. For
wasting time. But not one time can I ever recall
in the history of football, in the Premier League
for certain, a referee getting another yellow
card out for a player. So they never get sent
off for it. They just get one yellow card and
they just get told off, come on, come on. And
they never do it. So there's no punishment. So
now they've got eight seconds to release the
ball. So that means the people in the background,
the minute a keeper touches that ball, they're
going to be like, get the count guy. Get a guy
now. And then when they've got eight seconds,
they'll be in the ref's ear, won't they? Corner!
Give them a fucking corner! The refs have got
to hold up their hand with five when it hits
five seconds so the keeper knows it's got three
more seconds. Oh, really? So the ref has to fucking...
Well, that just means that they're just not going
to get caught out, are they? I guarantee you
it will happen. Do you reckon? I guarantee someone
will score from it. We'll get nine seconds. And
I guarantee it will be a fucking massive talking
point. But I also believe, in my humble opinion,
that that should be the same for VAR. They should
only be able to look at a VAR... review for eight
seconds if they can't decide whether it needs
to be overturned in eight seconds the the original
the original uh call should stand so why do you
think that well because what happens in var is
someone will fucking tackle someone and they'll
go play on and then they'll be like no var review
and then the the people the ref will trot over
there have a look at it they'll show it it'll
look at it for like 50 seconds if not more And
then they'll slow it down, which makes it look
100 times worse. It might be a bad tackle, but
at the speed of it actually happening, when it's
slow, it just looks so bad. And then they'll
go, yeah, red card. After like a minute of looking
at it, no, no. You thought it was all right at
the speed of play when you saw it. Go over there.
If within eight seconds, at normal speed only,
you're watching it again, you still can't decide
in eight seconds. Just carry on. You should not
be able to pick holes in every single thing because,
at the end of the day, football's subjective.
There can be an offside decision. The offside's
a very cut -and -dry rule. If you're fucking
behind the last defender, you're offside, right?
You can still think something's onside and I
can think something's offside, even though it's
a cut -and -dry rule. It's subjective. Your opinion
versus mine. Isn't it like if you get your elbow...
It's any part of your body you can score with.
So you can't score with your elbow. But if your
fucking hair, your forehead, you've got a bigger
forehead or your foot's fucking one size bigger.
You're Mark Manson and you've got a fucking wham
cranium. Yeah, or one of your pig titties is
hanging over the line. So yeah, you've got fucking,
it's subjective, man. Yeah. It's subjective.
So if you're looking at that, no referee's going
to get the call 100 % right. You've got eight
seconds to go, all right, I've seen that tackle.
I thought it was all right. I've got eight seconds
to look at it. Still looks all right to me. Carry
on. There's no point slowing it down. They've
got so many people in the background on a VAR.
Exactly. All in people's ears. You've got fucking
fans shouting at them. Players coming over, pressuring
them. Just let the game flow, man. Yeah, but
even the people in the background in the room
or whatever, you've got like four different people
all analysing something. Oh, yeah, that's what
I mean. You've got people in the ear all the
time. So it's just fucking put so much pressure
on the refs and then they end up getting a call
wrong, I think. So I think eight seconds should
just be done, done and out of there. And now
they have to announce it to the crowd as well,
which is amusing. They trialled it a couple of
times last year. So if there's a goalless offside...
They do that with rugby and stuff, don't they?
VAR decision, offside. And they have to announce
it, but you can tell the refs are really nervous.
It's weird hearing their whizzes as well. Another
thing I fucking want, I want referees to have
to come out after a game and have an interview.
They never do. Explain why you made that decision.
And then maybe people will be like, oh, I get
where it's coming from now. Rather than just
be like, no, the referees are like untouchable
beings. They just do what they want. I always
feel like rugby, they should be mic'd up. Yeah,
but I think it's because of fucking footballers'
stinky attitudes that they're not. Because footballers
are just cunting and fucking all the time. Where
rugby players are respectful and polite, football
players are just whiny little bitches and won't
keep their fucking mouths shut. So that's what
I think. But yeah, 100 % mic'd up refs is the
way. And that was football politics with Prince.
Sorry about your tits, Mark. No, no, no. You
said it in the moment, so you must have meant
it. Yeah, spider pig joke. And then I called
him pig tits, and now I feel a bit bad. Yeah,
pig tits. Because that come out of nowhere. There
was no provocation there. Yeah, you said Mark.
You had Mark, his massive something over the
line. Massive cranium. Yeah, so I just thought...
His heads. Because you showed me a picture of
him being all fat and that. Yeah, no, that's
true. So, you know, psychologically, he's just
there. sorry man yeah see you soon anyway and
that's it see you later everyone