Hello, everyone, evening, Friday, end of the
week, end of my week. It's not the end of your
week. It's not the end of my week. Oh, my God.
Ash is testing out the old, the new microphone
with the microphone stand, something that we've
actually been kind of after since the very beginning.
The dawn of the beginning. We've been three years.
I know. We've been prehistorically just holding
it. Three years we've been doing this. We're
so good at keeping track of that. Giza said the
other day about the podcast. Did you still do
it? I said, yeah, three years the other day.
He said, what did you do? I said, nothing. Put
a microphone in a stand. There you go. Well done.
Happy birthday. Yeah. That's it. Plug the Patreon
quick. Blah, blah, blah. Patreon .com forward
slash watch the buttons. Exclusive content every
single week after every episode. Half hour, hour.
Full access to all of it immediately. Hundreds
of episodes. Loads of our posts that we always
post on there. All the posts. We're actually
getting better at the posts, to be fair. I saw
you put a clip up the other day of, what was
that, you ran over a rabbit or some shit? Yeah.
Yeah, Death Stranding 2, that was funny. Yeah.
All yours for £5 a month. Fantastic. Enough of
the advert. Fuck that off. Yep. You sweet? Sweet.
Gaming, you been melting? Yep, all of that. Fuck
me. All of that. That's been shit. Real shit.
Yeah, yeah, really hot. 35 degrees. Me and Steph
really wanted to play it, so we both looked at
each other and went, I ain't subjecting the laptop
to it. I ain't switching that on. I can't be
arsed. It's too much, man. Far too much. I can't
breathe in that heat. I feel like I'm inhaling
volcanic ashes. It's grim, isn't it? It's gross,
man. I saw a video the other day of an Australian
geezer saying, no, literally, literally guys.
This heat is different. I'm over here and I'm
telling you firsthand, it's fucking horrible.
This is 35 degrees. It's fucking 80 over there.
This is fucking worse. I think it's to do with
the humidity. It is the humidity. That's what
it is. It just makes it... And the fact that
we have a lack of AC and the buildings are designed
to keep heating. This house is fucking unbearable.
It's horrible. Upstairs is genuinely like a sauna.
It is grim. Grimness. Perfect time to break into
people's houses if you want to, A, break in and
steal their stuff, and B, see them naked. Because
no one's wearing anything when they're sleeping.
I'd break in just to steal a fan or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where's your fan? I'm taking
it. No, you're taking my life before you take
the fan. It's not happening. Yeah. Yeah, 100%.
But yeah, game -wise, you've been fucking about.
I've put 40 hours into an unknown title. Because
obviously I wasn't here last week because you
were busy. Friday before I believe I bought it
and it's called Rematch. Played it? Heard of
it? Yes, I have. 40 hours I've put into that.
That is Rocket League but actual football. Yeah,
so it's actually a game I am and could be really
fucking good at. This is very interesting because
I really want to get this and play it because
I've seen a lot of stuff and I've been interested
because I used to... Bang, Rocket League. Yeah.
See, I always liked Rocket League, but I wasn't
good at it because it's too much for my brain.
Couldn't get the aerials in. It's too much for
my brain to contemplate driving a car and trying
to kick a football because the dynamics of a
human being aren't there. Yes. I can't see the
anatomy. It's a fucking car. So the people that
are talented at Rocket League and I've watched
videos are insane. Like, full kudos to them.
But what I'm seeing with rematch is exposing
a lot of American useless cunts. because they
don't understand football. So you hold R1 and
you press X and you can do a, I don't know what
you'd call it, a flick over, a scorpion flick.
You know when you get it between your feet and
you flick it over your head. You can do that.
You just press R1 and X. You can do it. There's
no skill involved. It's two buttons. That's all
they do. They get the ball and they just do that
over and over again trying to score. You're not
the main character here. This is a fucking team
game. So I've slogged my way from... you know,
the bottom of the barrel because I was playing
ranked from bronze all the way. So I've done
bronze 3 -2 -1, silver 3 -2 -1, gold 3 -2 -1,
platinum 3, platinum 2. I mean, platinum 2. Yep.
And I've done all that solo queuing. And the
interesting part about it, and the only reason
I stuck with it, is I was like, surely people
that are good at this game know how to play football.
Yeah, yeah. Or have an idea of the sport. and
that it's not just a fucking get the ball and
run and look how good I am. Because if you just
keep spamming the same thing and trying to take
on multiple people over and over again and then
you finally score, I'm not saying good job, bro.
You're annoying me because you're a selfish fucking
idiot. That's very much what it's like in Rocket
League is I've got the ball, let me try and score.
The thing is with Rocket League is it's like,
if I remember because I didn't play it that much.
But you can't pass the ball. You have to run
it at people and then move off so the ball carries
on its trajectory or whatever. Or you can flick
it or whatever, but there's no actual pass button.
So you can be forgiven for not passing in Rocket
League. There's no forgiving in this game. Pass
the fucking ball, man. Or there's an actual pass
mechanic. Oh, right, yeah, yeah. There's a pass
mechanic. You tap square, you do a short pass.
Hold long hold square, you do a long pass. You
hold R1 and square, you chip pass. That makes
sense. And you press R2 to shoot or hold R2 to
shoot or whatever it is you want to do. But don't
get me wrong, it's very difficult. The difficulty
is everything's manual, whereas FIFA, if a player's
standing here and I'm here and I want to pass
the ball. Here, if I aim the analogue stick here,
more often than not, it's going to go to the
person because it auto -helps you, you know?
Yeah, yeah. Whereas on this, it's all manual
passing, all manual shooting, so you have to
actually have some sort of directional awareness
and stuff, which I'm really good at. I'm actually
very, very, very, very, very good at this game,
and it's nice to be good. It's very frustrating
when your teammates... I don't mind the teammates
being shit, but when they're just not passing
the ball, that's really annoying. Wow. But as
I've gone up the divisions, it's like a different
ball game, man. Excuse the pun. Everyone's passing,
playing out from the back, doing little triangles,
little give and goes. It's great. Such a fun
thing. But to get through the doldrums of lower
division, because obviously I'm just solo queuing,
it was a slog. But the actual game itself, it's
fantastic. It's got a massive, massive ceiling
for ability. Like if you could get five players
in a team. And you were all good. You could take
over the universe. Like I say, I see quite a
lot of it on TikTok and Instagram and stuff like
that. And I remember when it got announced and
I was very intrigued because, like I say, there's
easily thousands of hours that I've put into
Rocket League. Easily. And same with Mark. We
put in so many fucking hours into Rocket League
and loved it. We actually won like a weekly competition
on one of their ranked things where you play
for a proper division and shit. And yeah, we
haven't played that game for a long time. So
when I see rematch, I was like, that looks fucking
cool. That looks really, really cool. And I didn't
know that it actually released because I didn't
keep... proper tabs on it and then see it the
other day and it's only what is it it's only
20 quid 20 quid I think 30 dollars or something
very tempted very very tempted because it just
it's like you say it's for me looking at it I
see it as even though you're saying it's not
the same and I'm sure it isn't but it's of that
similar ilk to Rocket League There'd be definite
transferable skills from Rocket League. Yeah.
Because you can play off the walls if you want.
Yeah, because I've seen some people glitching
out where they're constantly headering against
the wall and just going higher and higher and
higher. They're taking that out. Yeah. I would
imagine so. The developers already said, we're
taking that out. It's core, it's a football game.
Yeah, yeah. We don't want any, because there's
a lot of people, you can also press triangle
to jump and hit the ball. Yeah, yeah. or square
to head the ball really if you're shooting or
passing but if you're trying to just like jump
in front of a shot or block a shot press triangle
to jump but the actual running and jumping animation
because there's a stamina system was faster than
like because you double tap L1 to sprint like
extra effort like the really fast boost you get
and obviously that runs out but just running
normally and just spamming triangle over and
over again so people just like drunken salmoning
over and over again was a lot faster than the
fastest thing. So they were like, we're stopping
that because... Yeah, that's not happening. No,
we want it... It's a fun game, but of course
it's a football game. So we don't want it to
be stupid. If I were to ask you, is it similar...
Is it giving similarity to something like FIFA
Street? I know in its core mechanics it won't
be, but how it is... I'd say so, but there's
not really... There's a couple of skills and
there's like, I say mainly that little flick.
There's a couple of little, there's a little
silhouette, a pirouette you can do, but not many
people know how to do that. And that's simple.
You just hold L2 and double tap X twice, but
not many people know that. But the skill comes
from... Because it looks so stupid and shit and
simple, but it's so in -depth. So when the ball
comes, a lot of people don't know you press X
to trap the ball. Or if you hold a direction
when the ball comes and then you press X, it'll
trap it and then turn in that direction so you
already get away from a person. There's a lot
of intricacies that people don't understand with
that. So I think FIFA Street was more just how
many step -overs and flick -ups can you do. The
lower league, yeah, it's all like that because
everyone's playing for themselves. But a higher
up division is much more... So it's kind of like
when 2042 come out and all the COD players come
over to Battlefield and they're like, oh, I can't
play it like this arcade game that I spent my
life on. It's slightly different. In all honesty,
it's probably, as gimmicky as it is from the
outside looking, it's probably one of the most
football games I've ever played. Yeah, yeah.
Because it's like... If you play five -a -side
with your mates, you're not going to get closer
to playing real five -a -side than playing rematch
because that is what it is. You can play three
-a -side, four -a -side, five -a -side, ranked
as five. Very, very fucking tempted, you know.
You're making me very tempted. I'll show you.
I've scored a goal or two. I've not saved them.
But the crux of it is I find it much more satisfying
to run up the pitch. ping a couple of passes
off a couple of people, all one -touch passes,
bang you go, bang I go, pass it back, and then
we get it back and tap it in. Then me doing 100
stepovers, flicking it up and scoring from 30
yards, that's not what's fun. Playing as a team
is much more satisfying. And you're quite good
at it. I'd say I'm really good at it, to be honest.
Which is rare. I'm not good at games. It's very
rare, because obviously you're old as fuck. Bald,
wrinkly. Nice eyes, nice beard. Thank you. But
at its core, crusty and decrepit. Fair. Bad back.
Fair. Quite smelly. Oh. There's a dad bod going
there, which is fine. It's expected at someone
of your age. I get it. You know what I mean?
There's not that much more time left. So in terms
of actually getting good at a game, especially
on a competitive level, doesn't really happen.
You know what I mean? we've heard the Destiny
struggles the WoW struggles the COD struggles
I myself am a part of that I ain't doing it first
person shooters on ranked I ain't touching them
I can't keep up my old eyes and I'm like a third
of the age of you so it just doesn't it doesn't
work so it's just nice to hear that you found
a game that's decent for you oh yeah and I'm
enjoying it as well most important thing yeah
another good thing is everyone has to have a
go at Doing everything. Yeah. You can go wherever
you want on the pitch. You're not put into a
certain position. Yep. Which is also a problem
in the lower divisions because everyone just
stays up front and you're like, sick, I'll just
do the defending then, shall I? There's only
five of them. Yeah, decent. Who picks goalkeeper?
That's what I'm saying. So the goalkeeper's picked
at random at the start, but every time a goal
goes in, in your goal or their goal, goal swaps.
Clever, very clever. But if you're in goal and
I'm out on pitch, And then a ball comes over
and you think you can get it. You run out to
get the ball. But you realise, oh shit, I'm not
going to make it. If I run in the box, as soon
as I put in the box that you're not in the box,
I've got the gloves on. Oh, it immediately swaps
you over. So I'm just in goal. What a weird mechanic
that is. It's great because if you get a knob
that just runs around as a goalkeeper, you just
go, I'll just fucking go and goal. And that makes
perfect sense because you would get, you fucking
would get that. You do. You get people just running,
I'm a goalkeeper and I'm just going to flick
the ball up and try and shoot. Yeah, people go,
I don't want to play goalkeeper so I'll go. But
goalkeeping's really fun and I'm really good
at that as well. So it's great. I'm really enjoying
it. I wonder what the, I'd imagine it's on Steam.
I'd imagine so. I think people are very positive
on it. Apart from the players are the problem.
All I'm seeing on the Reddit, because for some
reason when you look at something on Reddit,
all you get is bombarded notifications of that
subreddit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know why
it does that. Yeah, I keep getting that. Yeah,
so all I ever see is rematch is great, but what's
wrong with all these people, man? Pardon me.
Everyone just wants to be the main character
all the time. Because that's what people are
like. Everyone... Oh, sorry. Made me jump. The
fucking trailers just kicked in. Mostly positive.
18 and a half thousand. It done mega numbers
selling wise, man. And the customization is really
cool, man. You can customize your own character,
make them look however you want. Hats on, hats
off. I've got a cybernetic arm just because it
looks cool. Someone said, haven't had this much
fun. They've got 20 hours on record. Haven't
had this much fun in a multiplayer game since
Rocket League. Genuinely feels good to get movement
down. Server has lagged on me a few times, but
that's all I've got in terms of complaints. Haven't
had a night of one more round in a long while,
but this game keeps me hooked. This game, the
kind of game I wish I had a middle option for.
Not good and not bad, but needs a lot of work.
in its systems and the input lag plus bugs are
really annoying i also see that it has exactly
the same problem as rocket league had with the
community being beyond toxic and with the lowest
iq average i've seen amongst online multiplayer
games you know what i'll step in on that because
through my times playing rocket rocket league
i would agree that some of those people are the
most stupid people I have ever had to play with.
And I know that most of them are probably like
six -year -old children having fun on a little
arcade football car game. But fuck off. Let the
adults jump in and play it properly. Go and watch
Bluey or some shit like that. Yeah, just stupid
people. And there was this event called Heat
Seeker in Rocket League where you basically have
three -on -three. And you can't cross the half.
No, sorry, you could cross the halfway point.
But the ball itself, once someone hits it, it
would auto lock onto the goal. But based on your
trajectory, obviously it would either head directly
for the goal or hit the sides or whatever. And
most people, it's where you sort of become a
really good goalie because the ball was always
fucking coming at you. But every time you hit
it, it sped up. And it would change colour and
it would eventually hit a limit of how fast it
was. And the thing was like a fucking bullet.
And that was really good. But you used to get
the most fucking annoying people. If you boosted
into someone with enough speed, they'd blow up.
So you'd get people kick off three on three.
There'd always be one cunt that would just speed
towards the opposition, try and blow them up
or just hit them out of the way rather than just
playing the actual game. And there were so many
people calling for just stop people from going
across the halfway point. keep them in their
own half so they can't keep doing that because
it was so fucking annoying. And it never worked
because you could just jump out of the way. So
they were just wasting their own time. Yeah,
much like Rocket League, you've got, I think,
in Rocket League, you have four. They need to
change them and add more for sure. But they've
got four things you can say. So you've got good
job. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. We've got this.
And some other shit I can't remember. But yeah,
if I'm in goal, And I've saved 14 shots and no
one's defending. And then I finally concede.
Everyone just spams, good job, techers. That's
all it says. Good job, techers. And you're just
like, mate, you're all up there, bruv. I used
to be one of those people. It's so annoying.
But then what I try and do is when people are
doing that to someone else, I just, instead of
saying, good job, I just say, we got this. And
it does a little heart emoji thing. Because I'm
like, no, no, we can do it. Oh, you're one of
the positive people. I'm a positive guy, man.
You boring fuck. No, no, no. Because it's annoying
as fuck, mate. It's so annoying. Like, if someone's
like, I do do a good job. When someone keeps
hogging the ball, and then you click R3 to call
the pass, which is really cool. If I'm here,
and you're here, and you're running, you can't
see me in your peripheral, if I click R3, it'll
say, pass the ball. But when I say that, it'll...
instantly draw like a blue line where I am so
you could just pass that ball to me straight
away if you wanted to if you've got the tickers
but yeah they need to do something like they
need to add like unlucky and stuff like that
because there's times where I'm honestly like
oh man that was brilliant but you can only say
good job and that's only normally used to just
be a knob what they need to add is in game voice
chat no they've got that so why don't everyone
just use that or you don't fucking like using
it I don't like talking to strangers man they're
weird I love giving the old quick Quick chat
fucking messages. I've heard people think that.
There's this geezer the other day, and I say
geezer, he's probably like a 10 -year -old kid.
He was the most selfish little fucker. He was
not passing the ball. But then none of the other
four people in our team were talking. It was
just him. And he just kept going, pass the ball!
But every time he got the ball, he wouldn't pass.
He'd just try and shoot. So I think without anyone
talking, for the rest of the game, not a single
person passed the ball to him. Every... 20 seconds,
he unmuted. He's getting more and more angry.
Pass the fucking ball! It was hilarious. I was
cracking up. I've got two goals here that I've
scored. Yep. And I'll show you why, what is my
favourite and why. So this is one of my first
goals. Yeah. That I thought was... One of the
very first. You said the pass. Go on. Stand there
with your hands out. Missed the ball. Ball's
gone over to him. I'm useless, man. Missed the
ball. Thought I'd had it. Yeah. Speedy, speedy.
Yeah, you could lose control if you don't pay
attention. There's the blue lines he's talking
about. How do you keep control? Look at that
little flick up. Little flick! Boss! That was
cool, to be fair. That's a going off, mate. That
was cool. Little flick up. Look at that. Zoom!
Yeah, you get to choose your celebration. Got
that on now, though. I've grown up. Let's just
get straight to the point. I've already checked.
About here, I think it starts. Yeah. Oh, there's
Death Stranding. Oh, here we go. Oh, here we
go. 30 seconds in. Yep. Right, here we go. They've
won the ball. Here I come. I've intercepted it.
Little give and go to this geezer. He's give
and go to me. Fucking taking it back. I've give
a little give and go to him. He's going round.
He's going to give a little give and go and I'm
going to push it in. Fucking lay bosh. That is
fun. Yeah, one, two, three. That is a goal that
is satisfying to score. Yeah, well earned. That
was a team goal. Yeah, because we're playing.
I much prefer scoring that to the little flick
over volley thing that I did. But unfortunately,
not in the lower divisions anyway. No one really
plays like that. Yeah, yeah. Not so selfish.
Yeah, I reckon that would be me. Yeah. I'll be
a selfish player. But you want to win or do you
want to lose? That's up to you. I want goals.
I want as many goals as possible. I'm just not
an objective player. I've realised that. Terrible
with it. Football is, you know, if you want to
score, you've got to pass, man. That's the way
it is. You want to score, you've got to pass
the ball. Not if I can solo it. If I can solo
one goal, I can solo 100. Well, if you do get
it, we're never playing then, are we? Just piss
me off. As I said, I get people losing the ball.
I get people missing shots and missing passes,
but not passing at all is unacceptable. It's
just unacceptable. I don't mind you trying to
take on a player. as long as in the game you've
been passing you take on as many players as you
want but as long as you're passing the ball in
equal measure it's just when you're just constantly
never ever pass you're just flicking the ball
up over and over and over again it's boring man
when you get the ball how does controlling it
work because you said you can lose control yeah
so if you've got the ball it's like a little
circle that comes around you have to press it
when it's green to get that perfect control press
X, and you'll bring it under control. If you
do that in a direction, it will automatically
pivot in that direction. So spatial awareness
is really good. And if you do the double tap
sprint extra effort while you're running, if
you're not keeping control of the ball, moving
with it, you'll lose control and just carry on
running. And you'll be like, oh shit, I haven't
got the ball, and you've left it behind. Yeah,
I've lost the ball. But yeah, it's not difficult,
but it's a thing that you have to get your head
around. And yeah, the manual passing system,
I'm really good. It was probably my best attribute
in actual football was like long range passing,
spotting passes rather than anything else. I
wasn't a great finisher or anything, but I was
very good at passing the ball in tight angles
and defending because I'm stubborn and I don't
ever pull out of a tackle even if I know I'm
going to really hurt my leg. Yeah, yeah. Or theirs.
More often than me. I saw someone snap their
shin. the other day I heard it go yeah it's nice
it was like ooh yeah it's nice and he screamed
and he cried and I went into the comments and
then the first comment was why is he crying fucking
leg snapped in half mate it's a bit painful remember
when I broke my wrist that was the most painful
thing I've ever experienced this day I did my
collarbone in football I got hacked by someone
and just went straight on my shoulder and snapped.
And then they made me take a free kick after
with my shoulder fucking down like that. I did
not. I missed the free kick. I won't lie to you.
I hit the wall. I couldn't do anything with my
wrist. The bone was all mangled up. Yeah. Yeah,
it was a mess. Tasty. Yeah, I went up for a header.
Both sprinting for the ball. Both jumped for
the ball. He's got more momentum and was probably
stronger than me. Hit me in midair and I've spun
all the way around. Oh, and you landed. I landed
like that. And I remember, I remember the crack.
I remember the crunch and I remember the instant
searing pain. Yeah, that hot pain. Yeah. And
like that, it's like. pain that's just it's impossible
to touch you can't touch it it's just there it's
just unbearable and you're just like i remember
just laying in the heat and everyone went we're
fucking diving he's fucking diving yeah then
someone come over and i just heard him go oh
and then that was when i knew because i hadn't
opened my eyes that something had gone wrong
yeah yeah yeah that's the worst one don't look
yeah don't look mate yeah yeah it's all right
it's all right Good stuff, man. But yeah, rematch.
10 out of 10. Love it. Top notch. Top notch.
I think it's just a fantastic game. Crack on
for 20 quidlies. Exactly. And then obviously
we're going to talk about the big boy, aren't
we? I had no intention of playing this game.
I told you how much I hated the first one. I
don't know why I bought it. You had full intention
of playing the second game. No, I didn't. You
fucking did. I hated the first one. I finished
it out of like... Out of spite? Yeah, because
I was just like, well, I've paid for it and it's
Kojima and I love Kojima. What is this shit?
I see a lot of people and they go, people that
say that it's a walking simulator, you're all
NPCs, you don't understand. And then there's
like a circle jerk of people sitting there and
they go, they just don't get it. It feels like
the Final Fantasy Online community. You've just
got to get past the first 500 hours and then
that's when it really opens up. Oh, we love it.
I apologise, I was not part of the crew on either
side there. Final Fantasy or Death Stranding.
Yeah. How's it going? It's fucking great. Carry
on. Yeah. I don't know why because I didn't like
the first one. Yeah. It's not any different.
Yeah. It's basically the same. Baby's grown up.
Yeah. Fucking B8, BB. BB. BB. Oh, Lou. Yeah.
Yeah. The baby's grown up a bit. Obviously, I'm
not going to talk about spoilers and stuff like
that. stuff happens but yeah it's inherently
the same game although I didn't play the same
game that you played because I played Death Stranding
OG PS4 on the PS4 so it was never going to be
as fun on the PS5 Director's Cut you played they
added so much stuff in that like stuff that I'd
never seen or experienced or had like the tools
to use so a lot of the stuff is in it I mean
90 % of the game so far I've been in a car bro
So I haven't even really been trudging. I have,
but nowhere near as much as I had to in the first
one. But everything's just like fluid and I know
what I'm doing and I'm building stuff. I'm helping
with shit. The combat is fucking great. I love
the combat. I love fighting. I love sneaking
around. It's just great. There's more guns involved
this time around. Loads of guns, loads of swords
and weapons and that. Like cars. I've got a car
at the moment. I've fitted like a fucking auto
-looter on it. So if I drive past a package,
it just fucking goes... Picks it out, sticks
it inside. It's got a gun on it. It automatically
fires at shit. Yeah, man. And I've been playing
on the hardest difficulty. And I've done like
30 hours on that as well. What made you do that?
Just because I thought, I'm just going to fucking...
I'm having it. I'm going to have it. Because
I normally play games on the hardest setting.
But... It depends on the game. If I know I'm
going to get pissed off and frustrated, I won't.
But also the option to always turn it down if
it is too hard. So there is that option. But
I haven't come across a thing where I'm like,
this is ridiculous. I've only died a couple of
times. Yeah, and the BTs haven't really been
too much of a problem. I've barely seen them.
I've skirted around a lot of them. Yeah. One
time I did just drive into one by accident and
I had no idea. I was just driving along. And
then the car just stopped, and I was like, what
the fuck's going on? And then all this tar came
up, and I was like, oh, fucking hell. And then,
yeah, I was fighting some fucking beast. But
the boss fights, man, it's so much better in
this. I don't know if it was just the PS4, bro,
but it was shit on the first one. Now I can dodge
stuff. I haven't got to stand on a fucking platform
all the time to try and shoot. Yeah, it's really
fucking good. And something that I didn't know,
which was true of the first one as well, is that
the timefall only damages the container. So if
you get 100 % of the container damaged, it will
do zero damage to the actual product inside it.
I always thought that the timefall would just
continuously damage it, man. Wish I knew that.
So what's the point in the damage on the fucking
container then? Well, because then if you fall
over or something, you're going to damage it.
So it's better to keep it, like, you know. oh
what if you if you were to say throw that box
throw that container that would then damage the
contents yeah or if you're just if you stumble
and trip because you know if you're carrying
loads of shit all that time I was fucking wasting
repairing containers sitting there fucking spraying
myself because I was like I don't want to hand
it in if it's damaged same yeah what a fucking
waste of time yeah you didn't know either no
Nah. It's annoying, isn't it? Do you know how
much, do you know how much time, do you know
how long it took me to work out that I could
just get the spray out and spray all over rather
than dropping everything and then individually
spraying shit? Yes, that's why it was such a
cunt. Yeah, I didn't realise you could do that.
So I was, literally, I would have a mountain
of gear take it all off because at the time I
couldn't work out how to take off individual
bits either. So I would just literally just drop
everything, damage it in the process. Brilliant.
And then sit there aiming, spraying certain bits
and then putting it all back on without realising
you can just go... Yeah, just turn it around.
I mean, graphically, this game is probably the
best looking game I've ever seen. I've seen some
crazy shit, man. The best looking game I've ever
seen by a distance as well. It's insane. But
yeah, just mechanically, everything's better.
Everything's more fun. Everything's fluid. The
game itself is just fun. I'm always unlocking
something. Like something new is happening. every
time I'm doing something. So I've always gone,
oh, I can try this now. I've just unlocked the
floating carrier level two. I haven't even used
the first one now because I've just been using
a truck that I've customised and put my own stickers
and colours on and stuff. It's just a very fun,
good game and I can 100 % see why people don't
like it or that game, the first one, second one,
whatever it is. But then I can 100 % see why
people love it because it's also very like...
It's just satisfying, man. I feel like it's a
game that you've really got to lock into. You've
got to enjoy that. It isn't a game that you can
just pick up and scroll on your phone whilst
there's cutscenes going on and not really pay
attention to what's going on. I feel like it
is one of those where you need to be fucking
zoned in on this game to really experience what
the fuck is happening. I saw a clip of Norman
Reedus talking about... obviously filming for
the cut scenes and all that stuff where he's
like cry and he's like there's time for and then
oh look a whale he's like what am I supposed
to do I don't know what you're talking about
but I trust you yeah I've got no idea how I'm
supposed to cry but I will cry because you're
telling me to I love that I absolutely love it
Hideo Kojima's brain is just so fucking... He's
a genius, though. I don't understand. And I feel
like that's what it is, is the geezer's just
a genius. There's so many people that just don't
understand him. You just go, he's just not on
the same level that he's on because how his brain
is able to... I thought control was confusing.
And to be fair, towards the end of Claire Obscure...
You think, fucking hell, it's hurting my brain
to work out what is happening here. But Death
Stranding, I feel like, is just on a whole other
level where you just go, what the actual fuck
is going on here? Like, I don't get this. So
I've done, on the main menu, there's a recap
thing, which is handy. Yeah, that's cool. I also
watched, the reason I actually bought Death Stranding
2 is because I watched a Death Stranding 1 from
years ago, like why I find it a masterpiece now
when I first played it. So I watched that and
I was like, okay, I understand this geezer because
he's had a similar journey to what I did. I was
like, I don't really like it, but I'm going to
finish it. But he went back to it when the director's
cut come out and I didn't. So he had a completely
different experience than me. So yeah, that got
me like invested in it. But when I watched the
story and him explain it and then I watched the
recap and stuff, I was like, okay, when you take
out all the weird shit, I get what's going on
now. And then the second one is like, it's following
on from that but i actually i actually i'm actually
keeping up with what's going on i actually understand
what's going on now whereas in the first one
i was like why is that what the fuck is going
on and i never understood it i finished it and
i still didn't know what was going on now i actually
understand what bt is what beach is like what
why they're here what happened but i know all
of that shit i've learned it yeah yeah i mean
i turned to reddit to work out but even when
you read that shit it's still confusing right
yeah when you read a couple of paragraphs of
it and then and then yeah like finding out like
a if someone dies and then they're not burnt
to a fucking crisp within 24 hours they decompose
and turn into a BT which then fucking ends up
on the beach like all the buzzwords that you
just said and you're reading it and you're going
well You end up down a rabbit hole because someone
mentions BT but doesn't say what a BT is. So
you go, right, well, what's a BT? And then someone
tells you what a BT is, and a BT is there because
X, Y, and Z's happen, but they don't explain
what X, Y, and Z is. So you go, right, I need
to find out why that turns that into a BT. Why
is there a whale above my head? The floor is
black. What's happened? That all makes sense
now. I actually understand it all. Yeah. So it's
great. And I feel like I was... After reading
quite a bit, it was all clicking a bit, but then
it would throw something new at you that completely
fucking knocks everything out and you go, well,
fucking hell, I need to work this out as well.
I think that was probably one of my biggest problems
is I just couldn't work out what was happening.
Told you you wouldn't finish that game, bro.
It's tough, really tough. It's really tough.
You've done more than I thought you would. Yeah.
A lot more. I think the... It's one of those
where... I know there'll be a lot of people that
could just go into something like Death Stranding
blind and then play it all the way through and
go, yeah, no, that was crazy. But at the same
time, I think there's a lot of people that will
play it and would enjoy it, but they need to
get a briefing of what's going on and like a
thing for beginners before their first playthrough
sort of thing to see. to make the game just that
little bit more manageable and i feel like i
am one of those people like with the repair spray
and now you can just spin it around and all the
little quirks and that that just help um but
yeah yeah weird very weird one it's very good
it's very good uh i'll definitely finish it it's
i'm having a lot of fun with it um And, yeah,
I'm actually understanding what's going on. The
characters and that, they're cool as fuck. There's
loads of new characters that are cool. What the
fuck? Can you say what the setting is without
it being a spoiler? What do you mean? Where is
he? He's in America. Still in... Well, you do
go somewhere else, but that would be a spoiler.
That would be a spoiler? I'd say so. I don't
know, because I never followed the review. the
leading up to it. So I don't know what was marketed.
I don't know if it was marketed that he was going
to go somewhere else. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or if
it was just things. I won't say how he gets there
or why he gets there. I think I know where he's
gone. I think I've seen the clip where he gives
it away. So yeah, you go loads of places, man.
Like scenic and unscenic stuff. There's things
to see and there's not things to see. That's
what he sees. I got a boomerang though. It's
sick. You got a boomerang? A blood boomerang.
Go on, then. Let's explain some of the weapons.
Because in Death Stranding 1, there was a gun.
That was about it. A little fucking taser thing.
You do get more guns in Death Stranding 1. I've
got an AR. I've got a sniper rifle. I've got
a grenade launcher. I've got a fucking electrocution
gun. I've got a bowler gun. I've got a grenade
pistol. I've got a normal pistol. So what's a
blood boomerang? What does that do? I've got
a blood boomerang, yeah. You just... throw it
like a boomerang but you hold the button and
then the more you hold it the more blood you
put in it yeah yeah the more damage it does yeah
you got it obviously you're using your own life
force in your blood and you have to replenish
that blood and then you have to go and find the
blood bags I can't remember how it was in Death
Stranding 1 but if I've got four blood bags in
my pockets once one's used it automatically just
starts using the next one I haven't got like
a quip it or nothing but then what happens when
you run out of blood bags Then you just eat them
little maggot things, cryptobites. And what do
they do? Give you health back. And then, what?
And then it refills the bags? No, it's just another
way to get health. If you need more blood bags,
just fabricate them in the little terminals.
Make them. That's what the bugs were for? Yeah,
they give you health and stamina. Oh, God. Didn't
do that either, no? No, it's all squeezing me
in the head. You've got electrobites as well,
which give you, believe it or not, Battery for
your electric stuff. Yeah. Is the car electric?
Obviously. Yeah, yeah. Everything's electric.
Everything's electric. I've got a little tricycle
motorbike thing. Can you get ladders back yet?
Yeah, I've got ladders. I've got loads of ladders.
Yeah, but can you get them back once you've placed
them? I don't know. I've never placed one. I
just climb other people's. Oh, you never did
that in Death Stranding 1? Yeah, I put them down
in Death Stranding 1, but I don't know. You couldn't
pick them up, could you? I don't think you could
pick them up, no. I think you could just dismantle
them and that was it. You could just get rid
of them. No, I don't know. I don't think I've
placed one in Death Stranding 2. You're just
using everyone else's. That's fair enough. No,
that's fair enough. I'm just driving, man. Well,
I didn't know if I'd missed a mechanic. It's
the same with the ropes. Wasn't it basically
anything that you put down, you couldn't really
get it back up? It's cool, though, because I've
built a road, man. I found a road that was being
built. Sounds like a hippie for the end of the
world. There's a road I've built, man. You've
got to come with me. I built, like, someone had
already started building a road. Obviously, it
gets to a certain point where it's just finished.
It hasn't been done. I had loads of material,
so I was just, like, fucking back and forth,
back and forth, back and forth. I built, like,
four or five parts of this road, man, and I connected
it all the way up to the fucking next thing.
I was so gassed. Because every time someone drives
on it, it's like, do this, use your road, do
this, use your road. And I'm like, yeah, man.
So how, what is that, like, tarmac or something,
or were you just digging a path in? No, so it's
like, you... Like you and all the other porters.
Like a bridge. Connect. Yeah, so you start building
a road and then it will leave like a terminal
where the next part of road would join if you
had the sufficient materials. Oh, so it's not
like you're not placing the road yourself. It's
a predetermined thing that needs X amount of
material. Yeah. Well, I don't know if they predetermined
place it and then it builds it automatically
from there or if... there's certain places you
can put the road. I'm not sure on that. Yeah,
because I think a bridge you can put wherever
you want. Yeah, bridges you can. Because I built
a bridge yesterday for the first time. And yeah,
I built that. And I'm excited to see how many
people have gone over it today. Yeah, because
when you go up to stuff like that, it tells you
how many people have liked it and shit like that.
Yeah, and I'm excited to see that. How many people
have used my road today and how many people have
used my bridge. What do you get for that? Is
it just currency? It's just likes, man. It's
just likes. But it's just fun to see how many
people have gone over it and shit. be like oh
yeah that bridge was used it was helpful that
was a good that was a good old bridge and it's
nice when people pick up packages you've lost
or you pick up theirs it tells you oh such has
delivered your package for you and it's like
oh cool man do you get anything back for that
likes it's all likes what do you do with the
likes nothing nothing it's just likes just Social
media is the whole theme of the game, isn't it?
The whole theme of the game, like the strand
system, with everyone being stranded together
and so far away but still connected. It's the
whole theme of the game. So I remember when you
could pick up parcels and then leave them in
a... Was it a postbox? Was it called a postbox?
You can put them in postboxes, yeah. So say someone...
I come across a postbox and someone else has
left parcels in there. I can just go in there
and take them and then deliver them myself and
get all the moolahs for them. Yeah, you can,
someone can post them in places and it will say,
entrust to other porters. Yeah, yeah. So yeah,
you can, because that's what I do a lot. I go
out, when I'm doing whatever I'm doing, I'll
pick up loads of shit in the car, I'll just automatically
pick it up and then when I get to whatever it
was I was delivering, I'll hand the stuff in
that I was supposed to deliver and then anything
else I might have found. that was supposed to
be delivered there. Anything that's fucking miles
away, I'll just entrust to other reporters. And
do they pick it up from the area? I don't know.
I'm not sure about that part. Probably, but I'm
not sure. There's loads of other ways, man. You
can fast travel in a cool way that actually makes
sense. Can't tell me because of spoilers? Yeah,
yeah. Well, not really. I mean, it doesn't really
matter, but yeah, kind of. But it's kind of like
a spaceship -y kind of thing. And then there's
a whole monorail system now that you can ride.
And you can rebuild that like a road. There's
loads of systems, man. The amount of systems
in this game and the way they all intertwine
is mental. The first one, I was like, this game's
weird, bro. What are you going with? Because
you went from Metal Gear Solid, which is one
of the greatest series of all time, to this weird
delivery simulator thing. Now the second one,
I'm like, okay. picking up what you're putting
down now. I'm getting it. Because the systems,
and the technology itself, the PS5 is much more
powerful. So it runs smoothly. It feels good.
Do you think you could go back to Death Stranding
1 and then get a better understanding since you're
now playing Death Stranding 2? I could, but I
won't. No, yeah. I'm not saying that you would.
But yeah, if I did, I would. But I could see
myself playing Death Stranding 2 and just fancy
just going on there and just doing a couple of
deliveries because there's something so peaceful
about it. I don't know what it is, man. You know
what? I get you. I do get you. It's weird, isn't
it? Yeah, because that was the thing that I picked
up on straight away, was I was like, I enjoy
this, and there's something odd and simple about
it. It's like, I think that's the buzz with playing
a simulator type game. I know that Death Stranding
isn't a simulator, but let's fucking harp with
the rest of what people say and go, it is a walking
delivery simulator. And there's something weird
about playing something like that, which you
can do in normal days. It's like farming simulator.
You go, this is nice. This is hard, but this
is nice. I'm doing a job, but not doing a job.
Or fucking like HGV simulator or some shit like
that. There was something weird about delivering
parcels. Going like, I've done my job. I've done
what I needed to do. Now let me go and get the
next parcel. Well, did you know that... The actual
porter system from Death Stranding is actually
based on a real -life profession. And they're
called bockers. Bockers. Or step cargo porters.
And they carry over 100 kilograms of packages
up and down harsh Japanese mountain trails where
vehicles can't go. Some European countries, like
Slovakia, also have them to this day. And here
is some pictures of them. Oh, they look exactly
like fucking Norman Reedus. How mental is that?
They've actually got the backpack on. They're
sitting down with it on their back. You look
at the Australian and think, you look ridiculous.
I mean, he's walking down a path that's been
put in place by a vehicle. No, that's not. It
looks like it, but it's not. I think it is. No,
look, there it is. Planks. Yeah, I feel like
you could get a motorbike down that. Or a very
narrow car. Maybe, but then I imagine they're
going up mountains. Yeah, but how many people
are up in the fucking mountain that needed an
Amazon? Well, the man needs their apples, bro.
I mean, these apples ain't going to deliver themselves.
I don't know what they're doing, but I found
it fascinating that people actually do that shit.
Obviously, you're not carrying around fucking
bridge babies and whatever else you fucking got
in your pockets. Blood grenades and shit. Fucking...
They do hot lunch deliveries in India. They're
called dabberwallas. are the people that deliver
them and they're in metal tins and they go on
trains and shit like that with massive crates
full of these little individual metal tins and
they go and deliver them to office buildings
and stuff and they have it's something like a
98 % success rate of delivering lunches that's
very cool it's very cool I only know that because
Top Gear did an episode on it where they thought
they could do better and they did not I love
Top Gear they spilled a lot of the lunches I
am surprised yeah But yeah, man, I know you're
not going to finish Death Stranding 1, but...
How far in are you? About 30 hours, man. I feel
like I'm really far, but I also feel like I'm
nowhere near anywhere. I feel like once you get
over the 20 -hour threshold, that's a good enough
amount of hours to give a decent opinion on what's
going on. Yeah, mate, it might be actually like
20 hours, but it's very, like... No, don't do
it. I know what you're going to do, and I don't
want you to do it. Just leave it out. I'm having
a great time and that's all that matters. Yeah,
but I'm not going to tell you. No, but you said
this last time and then you did. No, I didn't.
You did. No, I definitely didn't. You definitely
did. I can't remember what it was, but I think
it was clear obscurity. No. It was something
like that. But regardless... No, because you
fucking tell me not to do it because you don't
want to know and I do it and then you go, well,
don't tell me and then you start asking me...
No, I definitely don't. You start asking me the
bullshit. No bullshit to be bullshit. That's
right, I've already pressed the button to have
a look. Okay, yeah, no, fair enough. I understand,
you're done. It's a very good game. Well, you'll
finish it in five hours. Okay, brilliant. It's
a very good game. I highly recommend it. Obviously,
I know you're not going to play it, but if you
ever do in fucking years to come, it's a massive
step up in everything. If I end up playing Death
Stranding 1... and then going into Death Stranding
2 if I ever get Death Stranding 1 what I will
tell you is that I won't be airing it live that
I will be playing Death Stranding 1 you will
just have to catch me playing it because I don't
want to have the embarrassment as I did with
the last time by saying I will get this done
I don't want to deal with it I'll treat it like
I did when I quit smoking just not going to tell
anyone because then I don't feel the pressure
of it because right now I can sit here going
we're talking about it one man to another and
I feel excited about it and I'm like I want to
go back over there download it with my super
fast internet it will take me about 20 minutes
to download it and then start playing it again
but at the same time I don't want to then hype
everyone up going he's playing it again because
if I let you all down then I feel terrible for
it I might play it I might not I probably will
I probably won't that's the attitude man who
knows I might jump on it I might do it I might
not That's just how it is. All I'm saying is,
from when I played Death Stranding 1, this is
like, this is the same game, but amped up in
every possible way, better in every possible
way. The story's actually digestible and I understand
what's going on. The characters are better. Just
everything's great. Everything's got purpose.
Everything's streamlined to be better than it
was. It felt very fidgety when I played it. Now
it's very like, oh, I know how to do that. It's
easy. I know how to do that. So there you go
then. That is, that's the... That's a very informative
podcast right there. Rematch. Decent game. 20
quid. Fun football game. Buy that shit, man.
Death Stranding 2. Fucking DPD. Have it out.
FedEx. UPS. Norman Reedus. Royal Mail. Bitch.
Have it. See you later, everyone. Ooroo. Ooroo.