This could be the episode that makes us go viral
purely for the fact that it doesn't help when
the audio cuts out. Why does it keep doing that?
Why does that keep happening? It doesn't help.
Sorry. No, I've completely gone wrong. Sorry.
I'll keep it anyway. Apologies. Basically, Ash
might die on the podcast. Live. Live. So that
would be interesting. You know what I mean? It'd
be a good send -off because you're here. You
could effectively do a live eulogy. If I die
on the podcast, I promise you now, I'll give
you my word that my last words will be, Uro.
Uro, Ash has got heartburn and tingles in the
arm. But I've given him some Gaviscon and we
crack on. Because the podcast needs to get done.
And a pint of coffee. A pint of coffee. So it's
a combo that's going to work. The one bow combo,
baby. Oh, I can't shout too much. We cancelled
our Switch pre -order. What? Why? What happened?
Bought a house and financially it's not smart.
Fuming. It's been a heavy month in terms of like
going away and other shit. So Steph was like,
it's probably not the wisest to blast. 400 quid
or whatever it is on on switch 2 and she was
like she she knows nintendo and just knows that
there will be another color scheme that comes
out and she was like i'll fucking kill myself
if i buy the switch brand new and then they release
another colorway like a couple of months later
so cancelled it gonna fucking wait plus i think
i think it's not gonna be like It's not going
to be like fucking yonks till they're back in
stock. It's not COVID days. No, yeah. And she
said that there's not really much that's going
to be coming out straight away. It's much like
when the PS5 first came out and everyone was
fucking scrambling for one. I know what happened.
Because when the PS5 came out, I had my pre -order
and then I cancelled it for whatever reason.
I don't know why I did that. But I cancelled
it and then absolutely scrambled to get one when
it released. And then when you do get one, you're
like, yeah, there's nothing here to play. This
was a pointless effort. But I've got one. And
it'll probably be the same for Switch 2. Well,
I've had many opportunities lately to get a Switch
2. It keeps popping up saying they're available
again. And I always go on there and I always
click on it and I'm like... And I always pull
out. For the same reason. Mainly because I have
responsibilities, but more so that all I'd be
playing is Mario Kart. And I know I'd be bored
after a week. And I feel like if you're in that
position where it's in your basket and then you're
humming and harring about it, that's when you
know, I don't need this. If you're sitting there
and you're going, I'm not really sure where,
if something like, I don't know, if Baldur's
Gate Collector's Edition popped up again, then
that's being thrusted on. Currently watching
the Baldur's Gate Free Collector's Edition statue
at the moment. How much? £260 starting bid, but
then buy it now £380. I will pay no more than
£260 for it. Unless I get it for starting bid.
What was the one that you bought but then didn't
buy? How much was that? £500. Yeah, that one.
That was for the whole collector's edition. Oh,
that was the entire thing. Oh, okay. Which is
the main thing I want. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah,
we'll wait and see. Connor still kicks himself
about that because he's like, I could have bought
that collector's edition. Why does that keep
happening? It's my mic. It's definitely your
mic. We'll roll with it until we can't. Until
we can't. And he's like, I definitely could have
got the collector's edition and then just given
him the statue. And I was talking to him, I was
like, why would you just give it to him? Rinse
him a little bit. You know what I mean? We're
all friends here, but let's be... Well, hold
on. That sounds more like a friend and you sound
more like an enemy. Yeah, but let's be businessmen
before friends. Well, let's not. We're rinsing
him for a patron. Let's be friends. No, he gets...
He buys a product. The product is received. Yeah,
yeah. you know he's just being like I know how
much that's what Mark was whinging about earlier
I was talking to him about the patron and everything
and he was like we've only had one round of t
-shirts and hoodies that's a cool cut I'm glad
I'll pay for it I said to him but you pay for
the patron dot com forward slash what's the buttons
you pay for the exclusive episodes not for merch
that was just a gesture of our kind the merch
comes later you know you know what I mean don't
be ungrateful you fucking bald idiot Useless.
Take your lift home and be happy with it. You
know what I mean? There's your Patreon money.
Roman's got into Warhammer. I see his message.
He's got straight in there. He went out with
Connor and Connor's obviously played on his ADHD
mind. I mean, Warhammer's fucking interesting,
full stop. And yeah, Roman's like heavy into
Pokemon at the moment. And just went all in,
bought the fucking paints, a couple of figures,
the brushes, went down to a Warhammer shop near
him. And he said that they were really nice because
he went in there and just like typical Warhammer
place, relatively nerdy, right? Relatively. And
he went in there and he apparently said to him,
he was like, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
but I want to get into it, so help me. You could
take advantage of that. But I feel like Warhammer's
already taken advantage of you full stop because
of how expensive all of it is. So you don't need
an external force taking further piss. So give
him a book and then loads of other shit. And
he actually spent all night painting his first
figure and has done a decent job of it. But I,
for the life of me, cannot remember the faction
that he has gone for. Because I know you were
interested in World Eaters. Am I right? You're
right. And then I was looking at Necrons. And
I know Connor, I don't know what Connor's doing.
I don't know what he runs with. You remember?
He's got the little aliens and space marines,
I think. He's definitely got space marines. He's
got loads of different armies. He's got everything.
Yeah. He's got everything. But that was basically
the topic of conversation. Custodies. That's
what Henry Cavill's using. I'm growing necrons.
Shall we? Yeah. I love that. It's great. But
yeah, so it's just such an in -depth thing to
jump into. It's scary. I'm too into D &D to do
that. But I'd love to. If I had the room to do
the painting, I think I would do that. Because
I've got, for Christmas, I've got a D &D. miniature
collection of the story books that I'm reading.
There's like 12 figures in there that I could
paint. One, I wouldn't start on them because
I'd fucking butcher them. And two, I just haven't
got the room and the space. It's just so incredibly
time consuming to do loads of that. Kids go to
bed, paint a couple of figures. Love Island's
on, I'm not interested. I'll paint on some plastic.
Yeah. I mean, Connor really stuck some time into
trying to finish some of his models that he was
painting. And he was a tired man in the mornings
for a solid week or two because he was like,
I just need to paint them. I need to get through
them and I need to paint them. He loves it. If
I had that space and that spare time, I would
do something similar. Or I'd just be playing
computer games. Yeah. There's not much to model.
I think that's why... This mic is pissing me
off. Let me fix this. I've done a little bit
of technical analysis here and my solution for
fixing the mic cutting in and out is doing absolutely
nothing. I've just picked the cable up and put
it on my lap. So let's see if that fixes it.
If it does it again, then we'll just call it
a day and fucking give up. Yeah, I feel like
the main demotivator for me getting into Warhammer
is... It's like with the reading. It's just sitting
down, taking time away from gaming and other
shit, and then painting. Because I feel like
I'd really enjoy getting stuck. Because I've
got some Warhammer books over there, Age of Sigmar,
and then a load of World of Warcraft books. And
I'm slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly getting
through them. But you give me the option between
either sitting down and reading a book or sitting
down and playing Expedition 33 or something like
that at the moment, then I'm doing that. You
know what I mean? So it's quite an arduous task
to get into. And then when you actually delve
into the lore of Warhammer, you ever seen that
spider chart of all the factions and shit like
that? No, but I know it's... Or all the books,
if you were to read them in order of lore and
all that bollocks. It's just fucking daunting.
So daunting. Yeah, there's a lot to it. And that's
what makes it interesting. The thing is that
I think if I had all the spare time that you
boys have in terms of, like, you're busy, but
you can get in and decide how busy you are, I'd
be paralysed by choice. I wouldn't know what
to do. Or in terms of Warhammer, or just in terms
of... Just all of it. I'd be like, I want to
read. Oh, no, I want to paint. Oh, no, I want
to watch this series. Oh, no, I want to play
computer games. I'd be like... Because whenever
I do get the odd occasion where I am alone for
a few hours, I end up just having a nap. because
I'm like I don't know what to do I can have hours
of free gaming here or I could do some drawing
or I could read in peace and then I just don't
know what to do so I just fall asleep I'm terrible
for that when you sit there all day and you go
I'm going to get home and I'm going to do this
this this I'm going to play this and then you
get home knackered and then yeah knackered and
then it's almost like you tease yourself where
you go I have a couple of hours here where I
can sit on the playstation but let me just go
and quickly do this and then do something else
and fucking watch a series or something and then
you but like I'm terrible for I'll start watching
a TV series but then whilst I'm watching it I'm
thinking oh yeah I could play this game I'm really
excited and it's like you can fucking play it
now you dick yeah turn this off what am I doing
I absolutely love Expedition 33 I'm having we
need to talk about that because we're not talking
about games we're just bollocking on let's go
on to games shall we I've seen you've been smashing
it out I turned the Playstation off the other
weekend Late. And I looked and you were still
fucking on Expedition 33. I don't know if you'd
not turned the PlayStation off or you were still
gaming at gone midnight. Oh, what, on a weekend?
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. No, I was playing until like
three in the morning. Man's gone deep, Bev. I
was in. Talk to me, but carefully. But talk to
me. I don't know how you can be careful with
it. See, this is what I was saying to you. I
don't know how you can be careful with it. I
don't know why it's that dodgy. It's just very,
very good. Geese are at work. Who's playing it?
Don't like turn -based games. Doesn't like that
sort of game at all. And he told me the other
day, it's fucking incredible. And I was just
like, how are so many people saying this? From
another person who doesn't like turn -based gameplay,
it's extremely fun. I think it is because of
the dynamic combat in it and how you can really
add your own flavour and fuck about with it.
So the build that I've got at the moment... with
one of my one of my people um i don't want to
say names or anything because that would be a
spoiler um so but they i've set them up now so
rather than using their abilities or their spells
their main fucking damage dealer is their base
attack because i have a weapon that allows you
to use your base attack a second time like after
you use it so you use a base attack and then
it does it again and then You pair that with
a couple of pick toes where it will be like,
right, so your base attack now does 50 % damage
and your initial hit will apply defenselessness.
And then your third pick toe will do X, Y, and
Z, double down, blah, blah, blah. So you can
build something around something so simple. And
then at the drop of a hat, you can just change
it. I think that's really cool as well. So rather
than having a cost... to changing your abilities
around and shit like that. If you've already
got them, you can just chop and change them,
which is quite nice. So obviously when you level
up, you can buy new abilities and you can level
up your stats and all that shit. You can reset
them, obviously. But going through your builds
and shit, you end up with too many spells anyway
because you can only have six equipped at a time.
So like right now, one of my lot have like 10
spells. So I'm not going to use them. But they
all do different things. So depending on where
I am, I can just chop and change all of them
for free and very, very quickly. And the pictos
just make it really nice to play because you
can pick up one that will do some really cool
shit, equip that to one of your characters. kill
a couple of things, and then you unlock the passive
thing for that so that everyone else can purchase.
So I feel like it just adds way more flavour
to just a turn -based game. And the story is
really fucking cool. And the soundtrack is really
fucking good. And the worlds themselves look
incredible. Really fucking nice. Every person
that's playing it and saying it's sick is correct.
It is sick. I highly recommend it. You know that
I'm going to love it. It's 45 quid, for fuck's
sake. That's good enough. I know you, I think,
after the Indiana Jones situation. I don't know
how much I really do. But you would love Claire
Obscure Expedition 33. I'm definitely going to
play it. 100%. It's just a matter of when. It's
such a... fucking good game it's so good and
thing is like I think I've put it feel it's a
weird thing where it feels like I'm sinking a
shit load of time into it but I've only put like
I don't even think I've hit 20 hours yet which
is weird because it feels like I've thrown a
load of time into it yeah but it is for you because
you tend to not really do that you play a lot
of short games now and then just do well didn't
you so but um well this I haven't played well
for about three weeks Wow. I just haven't touched
it. Mental. I just haven't been interested. So,
what was the fucking thing that I was saying
that was leading on from that? Because I've only
put that amount of time in. Bloody, bloody, blah.
Oh, yeah. But I've just been sidetracked with
doing other shit in the game rather than the
main story. I think I've seen spoilers for the
bit that I'm about to do, which is fine. But
it's just good. I can't really say much more
than that. It's just fucking good. It's a game
that I really did not expect to like. And I feel
like if it was 60, 70 quid, I probably wouldn't
have bought it. But having played it, I would
100 % pay 60 or 70 quid for it. All day. It's
great news. Have you heard of Edge? Edge Magazine?
Yeah. Yeah, back in the day. That was the one.
Claire Obscure, Expedition 33. is only the 28th
game to receive a perfect score from Edge Magazine
in 30 years. Deserves it. So that's pretty high
praise, isn't it? Deserves it. Quickly, if we're
talking about Edge Magazine, kind of similar
but not similar, just very quick. Yesterday I
was in an off -license and they were selling
nudie mags and porn videos. Haven't seen a nudie
mag and a porn video for a very long time. Davy
D's used. One of them was sealed, but the DVDs
and stuff were all used. Fair enough. Which is
odd. But yeah, just because you're talking about
Edge magazine. You're thinking about Edging.
Edging, put the two together, porn, blah, blah,
blah. Makes sense. Yeah, no, it deserves it,
100%. It's a serious game of the year contender.
Oh, yeah. Serious, serious. If you were in a
gaming drought and you were thinking, what game
should I play? Should I play this? Should I play
that? Expedition 33, all fucking day. Mate, I
am in the complete opposite of a gaming drought.
I have this time where I've got all these games
and I don't want to play any of them. And then
a coin flips and I'm like, I've got all these
games and I want to play all of them. And I don't
know what turns that light on and off. I don't
know. Autism. Probably. At the moment I'm playing
Warzone still. I've banged out a whole season
of FIFA. Playing Portsmouth career mode. What
did you finish up as? What position? Yeah. I
got promoted from the Championship into the Premier
League. I finished sixth, or fifth or sixth,
and then I went up through the playoffs. It was
a stressful time. Decent. Yep. So I got promoted,
and now I'm in the Premier League, and... Struggling,
cracking on? Struggling a little bit, yeah. I
beat Leeds, which were my main rival, 1 -0. Yeah.
I think I beat West Ham 2 -1, which was a little
sweetener. Yeah. I got pumped by Liverpool, pumped
by Chelsea. Which is what you'd expect. It's
realistic. Because I've got, what you can do
on FIFA is you can change all the sliders. So
you can change the sliders being like the bar.
So zero to 100 sprint speed, yada, yada, yada.
Yeah. For yourself and the computer. And like
the professional YouTubers that do career modes.
try and make FIFA as realistic as possible so
you look at their sliders and be like okay they
put all these down and this up and like first
touch accuracy and all that sort of stuff because
FIFA inherently is just an arcade fucking football
game but you can turn it into more of a do they
have like a default for it or like a preset only
for Fucking the default game is just too fast.
It's not like real football. It's just silly.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I get why they do that
because, you know, brains want to go quick. But
I want a slow build up through the defence into
the midfield. You know, I want to ping a ball
and then the player, great ball in and then the
player miscontrols it, goes out of play. That's
realistic. Do you mean the speed like the clock
when you're playing FIFA and it's like going
up a couple of minutes in seconds? No, no, no.
I mean the actual game speed. The actual game
play itself. The game play is too fast. They
kick the ball too fast. But you don't see them
actually playing. It's FIFA, not Football Manager.
Oh, what? I'm playing FIFA. FIFA. I thought you
were playing Football Manager. No, FIFA. You're
playing FIFA? Yeah. See, in my head, it's just
the same stuff, but I'm trying to not be that
kind of guy. Football Manager, isn't it? So how...
How what? I don't know, because I don't play
FIFA. So you played as Portsmouth, and then...
Well, you've got the ultimate team where you
open all the packs, spend loads of money, play
offline single -player career modes. And that's
what you're doing. I'm a bold man, called my
name, and I am now the manager of Portsmouth.
I go to press interviews and I'm all bold and
hairy. And then I play the games. Oh, okay, cool.
I understand what you mean. So, yeah. So it's
just like playing real football. I slugged out
46 games of fucking championship football. 46
games, fucking hell. It's like six, seven minutes
and a half as well. So that's a lot of time.
That's a lot of time, you know. That's a lot
of time that you were dragging in there. Did
you get annoyed when you were getting battered
by, say, like Liverpool or Chelsea? Was that
frustrating? No, it was satisfying. Satisfying
to get beaten? Because it feels realistic. Because
then you're putting in a challenge. Yeah, I don't
like playing. That's why I never play as like
West Ham. I'd still get smashed as West Ham.
If I play on the normal difficulty at the normal
speed, I'll beat Liverpool 6 -0. It's boring.
It's not realistic. It's never going to happen.
I'm confused by the speed. Well, the speed of
the game. The game is inherently, you pass the
ball, the ball goes boop, boop, boop, boop. You're
passing around to players, but when you turn
the pass speed down, the ball travels slower.
Right, so it's the actual physical movement of
the game. If you ping a pass over to one of your
teammates, their first touch is always 100%.
They bring it down. You change like... touch
error or whatever to whatever these YouTubers
are saying and sometimes they might miscontrol
it and it'll go out of play and that's realistic
that's what shit happens but when you're playing
online or stuff obviously that shit is turned
off and stuff or dialed in so it doesn't happen
because otherwise people will be like oh I only
lost because fucking yeah because my guy didn't
fucking yeah and that's no fault of their own
so control the ball I just make it as realistic
as possible And it's a good time. So, yeah, I've
been banging that out. Is it dragging you back
into something like Football Manager, you reckon?
Oh, yeah, I put Football Manager on the Steam
Deck, didn't I, and saw that it ran and turned
it off really quickly. I was like, that scares
me. That's very scary. Yeah, but that was a very
fun time. For you guys. Yeah, people really enjoyed
that. Yeah, mate, I will bring it back. I don't
know why you haven't dropped back into that.
Because it's the most time -consuming game of
all time. Once I'm doing that, that's all I'm
doing. To me, once I'm playing Football Manager,
I haven't even got family anymore. I'm in a bubble
I don't even hear them I'm just thinking about
tactics transfers you know what I mean press
conferences yeah suits on for finals I loved
it I know and then you wanted your fucking badges
and all of that coaching badges coaching badges
that you never got it's upsetting and twerp wasn't
it and twerp that's the one and twerp great fans
terrible board great fans terrible board That's
what it is, isn't it? Didn't the board of directors
say, take your badges and fuck off? Essentially,
yeah. Yeah. So I did. You ain't going to get
your badges. And that was where my career ended.
Was that where it ended? I thought you went on
to a different team, though. No, I just went
to the job centre. Because I was going to win
the Europa League, wasn't I? Oh, yeah, and you
kicked off and you said, you won't even give
me my badges. I'm about to fire. I've done all
this for you. Got you to a European Championship.
Yeah. Shouldn't have even got out of the group
stage. Got you to the fucking final of the European
Cup. Yeah, and then they weren't going to give
you your badges. Because they were scared I was
going to leave if I got more badges. Well, I'm
going to leave if I don't, so make your mind
up. Imagine that as a bluff. Or imagine just
playing that. Look, we understand that you're
under a bit of pressure here, Prince. We get
that. You've done really well for the team. I've
heard from Gary. that you're after a couple of
your coaching badges as any coach. Gary's a fucking
snitch. Bring him into my office after. No, I
know. Well, I don't know. Sorry, I'm not agreeing
with you. This is a recorded meeting, by the
way. Well, who am I talking to then? Who, me?
Why are you answering me if you're a recorded
interview? What do you mean? What's going on
here? No, no, no. We're recording the interview
for training purposes. This isn't a meeting to
bash other members of staff. Well, fuck Gary
if you're listening. Right, okay, we'll remove
that from the edit. Gary said that you was after
your coaching badges. I understand that. I feel
like us as the board want to give you the badges.
We really do. But we've had this happen before
and seen it happen with other clubs where basically
we're just scared that if we give you the badges,
you will leave us for another team. And it will
damage us quite severely as... Antwerp. So I'm
really sorry but we've made the decision as the
board that you're not going to get those badges.
Okay. Well then I'm going to leave then. What
do you mean you're going to leave? If you don't
give me the badges I'm going to leave. But we're
worried that if we give you the badges that you're
going to leave. Yeah but that's fine. So what
you're saying is either way you're going to leave.
Would you leave if we give you the badges? Eventually.
Sure. You come from nothing. Yeah. Remember that.
You came from some shitty little team in England
and now you're here with us. I actually made
my name in China, but I digress. Exactly. Pointless.
I flopped in England. Exactly. We remember that.
Yeah. You should remember it too. I made my name
in China. You made your name in China. Come to
Belgium. Come to Belgium. Smashed it. Got you
into a European final. You ungrateful dickhead.
Ungrateful dickhead. And now you're dictating.
It's making me angry. I have to log in and talk
to the board. But now you're dictating what the
board does. You're not in charge here. We are.
We pay your wages. You're not my boss. I've quit.
I am your boss. You haven't quit. I don't accept
this resignation. There it is. That's my resignation.
Let me give you my car keys. You cannot do this
to me. Taking my Range Rover. You can't do this
to us. Beep, beep. I've drove off. Don't ring
me. Don't ring me. It's over. That's similar
to how it would go, I would imagine. God, you
should get back into that. I'm going to have
to load it up and have a shower. You're going
to have to just have a little... Have you left
the board yet? Have you left the team yet? Yeah,
I've left. I'm going to reapply. Yeah. Can they
come back to you? Can they come crawling back
to you? They can offer me a job again or they
can offer me an interview or whatever. Yeah,
of course they can. Yeah. Does that happen? Is
that something where that would be facilitated?
So you've left on a term where they don't want
you to leave. So you've gone, fuck you, I'm gone.
I'm going to go and get my badges elsewhere.
But you don't know where you're going. Is there
a chance that they might email you, say in a
week, and go, look. Possibly, I don't know. It's
water under the bridge, yeah. Football manager
always has weird little things where you don't
expect to pop up. But yeah, just having job interviews
and stuff and they're like, oh, I see you're
in for a lot of jobs at the moment and stuff
like that. But would you not think that you're
now a volatile applicant? Because other teams
are going to look at you and they're going to
go, he didn't get what he wanted. He's got the
hunger. But is that going to fuck us up? Because
I feel like... I made my name in China. I got
a team... I can't even remember what their name
was. Shang Long Ding or something it was. Something
Ding, I think. I got them promoted. And fucking...
I think I got them finishing in their Champions
League spots or whatever it was. And I got poached
to go to Belgium. I got poached by... So they
nicked me off another club. So, you know, pot
kettle black. You know what I mean? That's like
cheating on your missus and then she cheats on
you and then you have a go at her. Well, no,
hold on. Yeah, hold on. So give me my fucking
badges, Antwerp. I got you into a European...
They don't even get into Europe. I got them into
a European final. Why don't you go back to England?
That's what I'm going to do. Well, that's what
I was going to do. Is there anything specific
that we're looking for? What division are we
trying to roll into it? Well, nothing lower than
the championship. I've had a taste of European
football. I'm not going lower than the championship.
Championship's quite a tasty league to be in.
One of the best leagues in the world. Hardest
league as well. I reckon it's the hardest. The
richest, richest match in football. It is. The
championship playoff final. Is it? Mm -hmm. 120
million. Really? Yep. Why is it such a hard league
to get in and out of? Because the team, because
any team can go up because you've got the playoffs.
You've got top six. So the top two get automatically
promoted and then from third to sixth they'll
play... They'll play each other and then so on.
So the playoff is just... Anyone can go up. So...
I say Luton were in the Premier League last year.
No, they're down again, aren't they? No, they
were relegated to the Championship. No, they
were relegated to League One. Yeah. You've got
fucking Charlton coming back into the Championship.
You've got Wrexham in the Championship now. You've
got Wrexham in the Championship. You've got fucking
Bournemouth that went from like... League 2,
League 1, Championship, Premier League, established
Premier League clubs. You know what I mean? It's
just a mad, mad division. So, Championship's
always exciting. That's why I tend to start in
the Championship on FIFA or... Well, this is
your calling football manager on the Steam Deck.
Getting yourself in the Championship. Get yourself
in the Championship. Is it... It won't be up
to date with current teams, will it? In terms
of their positions. You can edit all that if
you want. You can. I'm still waiting. I probably
will, but I'm waiting for the new football manager
because he got delayed and blah, blah, blah.
Throw Wrexham in the championship and fucking
coach him. I'll probably do a Wrexham file. Yeah,
I'll probably do a Wrexham file. But the trouble
is, I like to do it so it's realistic, so it's
like I've earned everything. But if you go into,
so I took a job in the championship. you set
your qualifications so you can just be what's
your reputation Sunday League football or Premier
League Premier League elite level or you can
be like zero coaching badges or the most coaching
badges league winners ten times in a row that's
what I did it's not exciting I like to keep it
original I'm just a Sunday League footballer
who's shit and got nothing you want the real
life grind yeah I want to feel it you want the
simulator I am that guy I've done exactly what
I'll come from nothing nothing because weren't
you weren't you with Dartford that's it Dartford
yeah he was with Dartford and you weren't doing
well in Dartford I think I won my first game
and then lost 20 in a row or something ridiculous
yeah and then fucked off to China don't know
why they were interested I fuck knows that's
such a weird move imagine that but football is
weird like that Graham Potter fucking His name
in Sweden and Roy Hodgson, I think he was out
in fucking Austria or something for years. Managers
do weird shit. Honey, kids, we're moving from
Dartford, moving from Greys... To Tokyo. To Tokyo.
Come on. Come on, see you later. Sunday League's
calling. It's a weird one, man. I do like it.
I do like it. I always think that with other
football players when they get transferred to
not just different clubs, but... Completely different
countries. They've just got to move all their
shit again. They just move everything. A lot
of times they keep their houses. They just move
to another house or they'll get a hotel for six
months and see if they like the place. A lot
of the club, depending on the level, the club
has player liaisons that will do a lot of that
shit for them. Find houses for them, find schools.
If you're top tier, they'll just fucking move
everything for you. You've got to worry about
shit, bro. Anyway, I didn't even want to talk
about all this shit. No, I know, but it's just
nice to try and reel you into Football Manager
again. I was playing Warzone. I've been playing
FIFA. And I downloaded a game that I've played
before. You've probably heard of. Goes by the
name of Elder Scrolls Online. Yeah. Why have
we done that? Felt a little MMO -ish, and I needed
scratching. Oblivion's got me tantalising my
taste buds. You didn't buy Oblivion. Yeah, I
know, but the thought of it has got my mouth
full. Why didn't you just get Oblivion? Well,
because ESO's free and I've already got it. That's
true. That's true. ESO is free. So I downloaded
it and I logged in and I created Solax. Of course
you did. Yep. So I'm playing as a Necromancer.
Yep. And yeah, I haven't really played it. I
just logged in. Do they have a Necromancer class?
You have to buy it. Oh, you have to buy it. Of
course you fucking do. I think you do anyway.
I think I bought it last time. We're rolling
in the same realms then because I haven't played
WoW for a couple of weeks and I was like, what
do I come back to? I want to do something else.
And I was thinking Unholy Death Knight, which
is basically a Necromancer as well because they
have a little undead ghoul that runs around with
them. Love that. So we're doing the same sort
of shit. I wish they would merge them servers
and make it cross -platform. It would be great,
but it's Mega Servers, isn't it? So you're never
alone. No, yeah, no, that's true. You are never
alone. It's just annoying that you can't play
over PC player and vice versa. Very fucking annoying.
But then I watched a lot of videos on it this
week and people were like, Mega Servers are good
for that reason. You could be in the most random
place in the whole world on the map that no one
will ever be. There'll always be someone there
doing something. And you're like, oh. And that's
what MMOs are for, isn't it? I used to it weren't
an MMR at all but I used to really like the Steep
and Riders Republic what they used to do is throw
in NPCs that would mask as players and like when
you're skiing down a slope or whatever and there
would just be like 50 other people and they'd
show up on the minimap as well but rather than
be coloured they were just little black dots
but you could see them as actual people and falling
over and laughing and all that shit and Even
though you knew that you were the only real player
on that mountain, it felt really nice because
it's like I'm not on my own. There are just loads
of people around me and it is comforting. Yeah,
I agree. That's the one thing I found when me
and Steph were always playing ESO was that it
very much did feel like you are not on your own.
You get there with RuneScape. I was playing old
school RuneScape on my phone just fucking around
and there's just loads of people knocking about
doing their own shit. No one's saying anything.
It's just nice because you're not, which is a
weird thing about MMOs because most people will
play them solo but enjoy having that company
but not talking to them. It's almost like walking
home from somewhere in the dark, whether it be
an event or something like that, and there's
just loads of people. No one's talking to each
other. They're all talking to their partners
or whatever. But that volume and that presence
is always quite comforting. Unless someone goes
crazy and starts trying to kill everyone. Then
that makes it a little bit more uncomfortable.
Yeah. But beforehand, it is quite nice. I don't
need you talking about ESO at all. Sorry. At
all. Sorry. Because I'm in an MMO slump. There's
a guy at work. I can't do it. He didn't half
make me laugh. He's played ESO for 20 ,000 hours.
It's the only game he plays. And he wanted to
become a vampire. But he's like... he struggles
with reading and stuff so which is mental to
me because he he can't really read but yet he
plays a very complicated game in terms of like
you want to look at the stats and the numbers
and stuff like that so but he loves it so but
he plays it so casually you know i mean he goes
into like dungeons and stuff or delves or whatever
they're called and uh he he pretends that he's
a healer or whatever and then they just boot
him out after a while because they're like you're
lying you don't know what you're doing oh, God,
I just want the loot. Yeah. It cracks me up.
But he said, yeah, he stood outside of this main
town for hours on end for fucking loads of evenings,
just standing there with his mic unmuted, just
going, is anyone a vampire? Can you bite me?
Bite me. I need someone to bite me. Can you bite
me, please? Just begging to be bit because he
wanted to be a vampire. And that is hilarious
to me. Yeah. you can do that. So yeah, I've got,
you know, Zolax, man, is my mage guy. I think
my geyser, I did make them a werewolf and then
realised that being a werewolf is absolutely
useless. But it's more aesthetics for me. Yeah.
Aesthetics, character building is just fun so
I don't think Zolax will be a vampire or werewolf
but it's cool to know that they are out there.
It's a very fun game and it's very, very popular.
Oh yeah, it's like the third most popular MO.
I wonder what the charts look like. Well, this
fucking microphone, I'm going to fix it for next
episode. Wow, Final Fantasy and ESO, last time
I looked at it. But then they've got a new expansion
coming out next week or something, so I think
it's going to even, you know, it'll peak again,
blah -de -blah -de -blah. MMO Populations, this
is the one. I think you're alone now. Okay, no,
really, it's actually number one. Is Baldur's
Gate free? Yes. I've seen that shit before. Nonsense.
And then... What the fuck is... Wuthering Waves?
It's the fucking new... Chinese. Is it Chinese?
It's the new... What's it called? Let me click
on it and see what it does. It's that fucking
game. It's that one. It's the new Genshin Impact,
basically. It's not Genshin Impact, but it's
the same sort of shit. is a story rich open world
RPG with a high degree of freedom. You wake from
your slumber as a rover joined by a vibrant cast
of resonators on a journey to reclaim your lost
memories and change the world. We're working
to resolve our compatibility with Steam. I think
I saw something about that a while ago. Is it
free? Yes, it's like the new Genshin Impact.
Honkai Star Rail is fourth. Yeah, that's the
same as Genshin Impact, but in space. What? Why
not? Honkai Star Rail versus Genshin Impact.
Is it literally just a copy? Well, it is. Similar.
Very fucking similar. You can play Wuthering
Waves on your phone. This is the same shit. It's
just like Genshin Impact. Yeah. It's the same
stuff. Oh, God, it's fucking anime. Let's meet
out. Keep me out of it. I have another gacha
game. How fucking strange. But yeah, fair enough.
It's a nice itch to scratch. I just wish that
they would do more with ESO. Yummy, yummy. But
yeah, if that were a cross platform, it would
be good, but at the same time, it would be an
absolute cunt if you were doing PvP and shit
like that. That's where it becomes a bit of a...
a bit of a horrible one I think it's good value
as well because obviously you've got the sub
with wow you get the sub with this but then you
get all the other stuff which is not necessary
but you can get all the expansions you can get
fucking the unlimited crafting space all your
materials just go and it's easy for me to cancel
as well which I like yeah that's true I can just
press a button I'm a fan that sees a ball like
log in do this I just want to see if there's
any more A Reddit post. Blizzard is preparing
the ground for a WoW console launch. Judging
by recent changes made by Blizzard in the upcoming
ones that the WoW official retail game client
is getting ready for an Xbox console launch with
some sort of brand new UI for consoles with some
mechanics like dynamic flights and such. This
is all speculation, by the way. When was this
posted? Two years ago? This was posted 15 days
ago. Oh. uh if putting wow on console forces
them to be less reliant but basically what's
spurred that conversation is that we got a little
bit of a showcase into one of the into the next
major patch um was it the next major patch was
it the next expansion i think it might have been
the next patch don't quote me on it where um
they're introducing a one button rotation i think
we spoke a little bit about it last time uh where
you just press one button and it will do your
rotation for you. But the consequence of that
is that your global cooldown is, I think it was
like 0 .3 of a second longer, which means in
real terms, on a competitive level, it's fucking
pointless. PvP is shit. Yeah, PvP and high -end
content, it's not going to be viable to play.
But if you just want to switch your brain off
and do it, then it's kind of like a AFK type
thing. But that, obviously... kind of more solidifies
being able to play it on console not that you
would release it where that's your only form
of combat but introducing something like that
allows you to at least get used to the game and
definitely makes it way more easier to play on
console with a controller if all you've got to
press is fucking X to do all of your shit so
I feel like they're heading in that sort of direction
There's also speculation of it coming to Game
Pass, which I can't see happening because WoW's
been around a very long time and they've always
used their own client and their own subs. So
it coming to Game Pass, but at the same time,
you get everything for free anyway, pretty much.
But Microsoft own them. Microsoft do own them,
yeah. They own Activision, so they can do what
they want. They can do whatever the fuck they
want, but I just don't know whether they would
bother doing whatever the fuck they want. If
someone's game passed, surely you still have
to pay the sub, no? So what are they getting?
I'd imagine the base game, because even then,
if you buy World of Warcraft now, you buy the
war within. It's just like ESO, unless you sub
to ESO. Because I bought the dragon fucking rider
one. You get everything beforehand anyway, so
you only have to pay... for The War Within. So
I guess you'd get that on Game Pass. But how
much more money? Just get it on fucking console,
man. Fuck's sake. Stop fucking about. You know
what I mean? Get it in me. Final Fantasy did
it. Yeah, exactly. And they did it very well.
Exactly. It can be done. ESO have done it. And
they've done it very, very well. Exactly. So
of course it can be done. Activision Blizzard
can definitely do it. Of course they can. It's
just if they want to. Yeah. Another exciting
thing, which I forgot, is the, for me anyway,
Kingdom Come Deliverance. Two first DLCs out
today. Yeah. So, got that to reinstall. Is it
decent? I don't know. Don't spoil it. I don't
even know what it's about. I know vaguely it's
about a painter and a skull or something. Two
DLC. What's it called? Brushes with Death or
something? Brushes with Death. Yeah, boy. Oh,
God. IGN review. I don't read that shit. I don't
want to hear the review. Do you want to hear
their six out of ten stars? Brilliant. No thanks.
You don't want to hear the review? What if it's
spoiler free? We don't like IGN very much. I
don't want to hear anything because I want to
go in blind. I know nothing apart from the fact
it's a painter. How to play Kingdom Come Deliverance
2 Brushes with Death DLC? How to start Brushes
with Death? I'd imagine it's because you have
to go and find a quest, do you? Is that what
they did? Give 6 out of 10? Yeah, you're interested,
aren't you? No, I'm just fucking joking. I hate
them. Absolutely joking. mainstream media they
did they did indeed give it a give it a 6 out
of 10 and you can start the DLC quest as early
as the end of act 1 I won't go any well how does
that oh they gave the game a 9 the review was
a 9 it took around 12 hours and you could probably
cheers you're a terrible gamer I didn't know
what I was reading. I'm sorry. It's in massive
bold writing. I thought they were talking about
the actual game. Forgive me. It's because this
article has Kingdom Come Deliverance 2 and then
a video of the initial review of the game and
then directly underneath that. in big bold letters
it says it took around 12 hours I don't know
why they'd format it that way I apologise but
it's a DLC and it's IGN so chances are they were
just fucking beelining the main But then the
same thing, I think I might have watched IGN's
review or something and it's just the same shit.
We've had this discussion before. You get people
reviewing games that don't like them as all games.
A 9 out of 10 is a brilliant score, don't get
me wrong. But then all the complaints, if I remember
correctly, if it was them, was just like the
combat's clunky and it's supposed to be. You're
not supposed to be a fucking wizard. I don't
listen to IGN reviews at all. No one does. There's
nothing that I pay attention from from IGN. They
probably gave Expedition 33 a fucking 7. Do you
know what I mean? Fuck them. They are very annoying.
I normally go to Reddit or things like that.
I want user, which is weird that you would look
at a critic and go, no, you're not real. But
it's like you're getting paid to do that. So
chances are you're going to give it a shit review
to get some hype up. What are you Googling? Brushes
with death review roundup. Can't help yourself.
Decent, looking decent, looking bad. Brushes
with death is a, this is IGN. reddit and it's
a bold caption so I'll just read the top bit
brushes with death is a low stakes episode that
doesn't serve as a strong follow up on its own
but might be a nice seasoning spread over the
top of a fresh playthrough top first comment
top comment whatever I played the DLC as well
and would very much do disagree with this review
brushes with death is a really really strong
standalone story calling it filler is ridiculous
in my opinion doesn't tell the next chapter of
henry's life but was anyone expecting it to if
you enjoyed some more of the in -depth side quests
from the base game like the kuttenberg murder
quest line then you'll probably love brushes
with death so classic case of probably again
it might even be a case of the person that reviewed
uh casey d2 didn't even review the dlc i don't
know Who knows? But what I care about is what
I will play and if I'll enjoy it or not. It's
very subjective, isn't it? Unless it's a really
bad game where everyone can come to a consensus.
Yeah. I'd sit here and say Expedition 33 is an
absolutely fantastic game. Everyone must play
it. You could play it and then go, no, this is
waft. It's like me trying to review fucking Gran
Turismo. I don't give a fuck. Or, I'll tell you
exactly what it's like. It's like Sam. one of
our dearest patrons, patreon .com forward slash
whatsthebuttons, highly recommended Granblue
Fantasy Relink. of that fucking game. And he
loved it. It's still in my PlayStation. Every
time I turn that cunt on, it tries installing
it again. I need to take it out. It's pissing
me off. Bin it. It's not worth it. Use it as
a coaster. Bin it. Oh, it's mine, isn't it? Yeah,
bin it. Give us a fuck. Who cares? I completely
forgot it's my game. I don't give a fuck what
happens to that. Fling it out the window. It's
pointless. But he said that that game was really
fun. So I went and bought it and then played
it and went, yeah, no, this is waft. This is
waft. Ash didn't believe me. I said, I'm telling
you, that game is waft. It's not that I didn't
believe you. It was I was inspired by your Death
Stranding. I was invested, which you've ruined.
I was invested in your story that you were telling.
I was looking forward to each week. I was like,
I want to do something like that. I'll try that
because you failed. And I put it on and I failed.
Yeah, yeah. Because it sucks. Yeah, it evened
out the equilibrium. I apologise for that. But
yeah, Sam is a hardcore gamer and knows his shit
and is extremely helpful in giving in -depth
reviews and everything like that. I can't fault
the man. But for that, nearly cancelled his sub
because it was ridiculous. The trouble is with
that though, but this is the truth, is the game
is probably fantastic. Yeah. It's just not a
cup of tea. That was the point I was making is
that we, yeah, he thinks it's a great game. I
do not. I am IGN in this case. I thought it was
waft. It's just that I don't like that art style.
I don't like that. Come on, guys. Let's do it,
team. High five. Wow. It nearly got us, but it
didn't. And we're friends and our friendship
can blossom into love. Fuck off, man. Let me
just kill you. If I'm watching anime, I want
to watch cyberpunk anime where it's just fucked
up shit. Yeah. I want blood, guts, and all the
other stuff. All the taste stuff that comes with
it. Yeah, that's not for me. So I need to take
that out of the fucking PlayStation because it's
doing my nutting. Put it in its broken case and
fuck it off. I need to download KCD2, which is
going to take 16 years. So I'm looking forward
to that. Bring a PlayStation around and download
it. You'll be done in five minutes. Well, yeah,
finger me. I've got to play some video games.
What am I going to play tonight? Probably ESO,
actually, because every other night I've been
playing Warzone. I think my mate's not on for
the weekend. Have you checked through the store
yet to see if there's any goodies that entice
you in? Warzone? Oh, ESO. No, no, because I...
Crown crates are fucking gambling for me. I was
getting bad. The trouble is with ESO is I like
earning things. The good thing about it... They're
all cosmetic, bro. The good thing... Yeah, yeah,
that's fine. The good thing about ESO is that
they say that a lot of the gear is always relevant,
so you can get best in slot from a dungeon that
was fucking five years ago. You can get it. It's
all different sorts of stuff, which is great.
And then there's these new... I don't know if
these new or if you were playing it when these
things existed. They're called like Apex mounts
or something. There's only three of them. Like
three god -tier fucking mounts that you can only
get. They cost a lot of money, I think. But you
can guarantee them if you do your dailies for
a year. You guarantee one. you haven't got to
do it back to back but if you do it I remember
you could buy like apex crystals or whatever
it fucking was yeah see I don't know the ins
and outs it's just the little video I watched
in the classic and people are like yeah still
got the best housing system people spend they
say it's the end game the housing was very cool
very very cool I can't fault that so yeah I'm
just I'm excited to get on there man so Lexi's
gonna have his dark story he's just gonna fucking
fuck everything up the trouble I have is as soon
as I came out the entry point I skipped the tutorial
like a numpty because I forgot everything. And
I pressed the wrong button and I attacked a civilian
and now I've got a bounty but I've got no gold
so I can't pay the bounty off but I can't talk
to anyone because I've got a bounty and no one
wants to talk to me so I can't earn gold to pay
the bounty off. Can't you just get arrested?
No, because they don't... The only two options
he's given me is pay the bounty or flee. Flee?
Yeah, so I flee and then I get died. I get deaded.
And then I spawn and they go, Hey! You've committed
crimes against the crown. We need money. And
I say, ah, fuck off. Right. Well, that's that
then. Patreon time. Yeah. See you later, everyone.
Ooroo. Ooroo.