A Bugs Life.
For me and you.
This is the way.
It's one of my flick on a dandelion seed.
Yeah, that's where I got it from.
One of my impulse buyers.
Yep.
Decent.
Let's not talk about buyers and packages and...
It's a soft spot.
It is.
Oh, yodel.
Yodel will fuck me over.
Fuck you, yodel.
Never buy stuff and get it delivered by a yodel.
They'll fuck me over.
Did you pick yodel as an option?
No, it's just what they use.
I've never had a problem with them.
Ironically, I've never had a problem with yodel.
And then Jem had some fucking little behavior charts we've had delivered for the kids.
And she had some problem with them not delivering it, saying it was delivered.
And then she was kicking up a right stink with them a couple of weeks ago.
Lo and behold, next package it gets delivered to mine and they fuck me over.
So we're blacklisted.
She's fucked them off.
Great.
Wankers.
It's Jemma's fault.
That's who I blame.
Fantastic.
That's who I blame her too.
Maybe you'll get the refund and then be grateful.
No, because I want the figure.
Yeah, true.
That I can't get now.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
You've got to suffer.
I can't help you.
I apologize.
I bet that's fucking silly money as well.
What now?
Are you about to look?
Yeah.
You was all excited before we hit record now.
Now I feel a downward spiral.
I might be able to get it on HMV's website.
Yeah.
What black series?
£33.99 I got it for.
Pre-order though.
So they're not even released it yet.
Well, how much did it cost you normally?
Did it cost that much normal?
Yeah.
Oh.
Oh, right.
What?
Did you think it was mega money?
Yeah.
I mean, I don't want to take away from the aggro because I'm with you on being very annoyed,
but I thought it was like hundreds of pounds.
No, no.
I'd tell you if I'd spent hundreds of pounds on a figure.
This is true.
Why don't you just fucking pre-order it there and then just get the refund on from Yodel
or Hasbro.
Well, I'll have to.
And then you'll pre-order it and then they'll send it out by Yodel.
Then you'll be fucked.
They've got it on fucking eBay for 80 Bones.
That's ridiculous.
You know what I mean?
This is what I mean.
They're scalpers.
So I'll be surprised that pre-order on HMV, because it's out now, that pre-order on HMV
is probably a fucking pre-order because they've sold out.
Yeah, probably.
Do you know what I mean?
So who knows when it's coming back?
Pre-order for next year.
Yeah, exactly.
So no, it's just bollocks.
I'm fuming and I'd prefer if we moved on.
Welcome to episode sat in sat in.
What's buttons by the way?
What was I going to fucking say?
I had something in my head that I was going to say.
Oh, fucking game took the money, didn't they, for Mirage today?
Oh yeah, nice.
Me and Mark were talking about it going, because obviously it's a week.
The fifth is when it comes out.
And we were like, normally they've taken the money by now.
And we were both speculating that we're like, what if in some horrendous world, because
it got pushed forward a week that the collector's edition hasn't.
I was like, what if we get it a fucking week later than we're supposed to?
But no, I should learn to be able to go home and then boom, £135 exited my account.
So that's fucking fantastic.
Which ain't bad though, is it?
Once again, really not bad.
You can still buy it.
It hasn't it hasn't sold out yet.
So there's obviously a lot of people just not fucking interested in it, which I find
odd because it's got it hasn't got 19 inches of venom, but it's got it's got I think like
eight inches worth of Bassim.
It's a cool collector.
It's a very cool collector.
Especially when it comes with the game.
So it's worth the price.
A lot cheaper than that fucking Starfield Constellation edition.
Oh God, I'm so happy I didn't get that.
What a game though.
It's very good.
I haven't actually played a whole lot of it since we last spoke really.
I haven't touched it.
I've been busy, man.
I finished the storyline between the UC defense and the pirates, the Crimson Fleet.
Spoilers, spoilers, spoilers, spoilers.
If you haven't played it, you've been warned.
I got rid of the fleet.
Crimson Fleet are gone.
I fucked them up.
And then got like like a quarter of a million credits given to me some shit like that.
And then I and then I put it down.
I put it down and then I didn't I haven't returned yet.
Not because I don't like it, but just because things like ESO and fucking cyberpunk have
drawn my attention.
Well, you can easily jump back into that shit.
100%.
I'm not missing anything.
But yeah, that ending.
You still need to get to that to see what I was talking about.
She's very interesting.
But I haven't even paid it any thought.
So I think you should talk about cyberpunk first because I might go on about bouldersgate
for a while.
I haven't actually obviously had the update, the big old update for cyberpunk last week.
I should talk about that because I know very little.
Yeah.
And I did play it.
Yeah.
So the update dropped, I was playing bouldersgate, but I was like, fuck it.
It's up.
It's updated itself.
So let's go and have a look.
So I logged in and yeah, loads of messages were popping up.
New UI, very clean looking like messages were coming through and then I was replying to
him.
It was coming up at the side of the screen, which like it looked like it should be there.
Yeah.
It was coming up that they were typing and stuff.
Yeah, I didn't take up the whole fucking screen.
It looked really fucking clean.
And they've separated it, haven't they?
The messages and phone calls and shit like that.
So it looks so much better.
It looks very clean.
So all I did was I drove around a bit.
Driving feels amazing.
Like you mentioned yesterday, driving just felt so much better.
I don't know what they've done to it.
So much more responsive.
Yeah.
I don't know what they've done to it, but it felt amazing.
Well, last time it felt stocky.
You went to turn a corner and you had to slow down about five minutes before you touched
it.
Yeah.
That was great.
It felt lovely.
So all I did, I didn't want to like reinvest all my skill points, all that bollocks.
I thought I'm not playing it properly.
So all I did was I reset all my skill points and I put all my points into the, so I could
max out the katana.
So I maxed out the katana so I could get the finishing move and like the ability to deflect
bullets and all that stuff.
And then I just went on a murderous rampage.
I started killing people and the cops would show up, but like, unless I was there, they
weren't just shooting me up.
So they'd come and look if I weren't in the vicinity, they weren't doing nothing.
And then when I was getting spotted, I'd like use my massive jump that I've got.
I'd climb over the top of roofs, jump down into an alleyway.
They'd lose me.
I'd lose my wanted.
So it's like actually fucking responsive and cool.
So when I lost out, I jumped in a motor and then I done a drive by that felt fucking epic.
The combat feels incredible.
I don't know what they've done, but it feels great.
I think they've added like some aim assist or something.
Cause now I'm popping, I'm popping people's heads.
It is lovely.
I managed to get enough of a wanted level to get max tack on me.
And then the big bosses dropped down.
They're fucking, they're naughty.
Have you had them yet?
I have not.
I do in the, in the cartoon series, the anime where they like do that thing where they like
blur about, they do that.
You can't really fucking obviously there's different bosses from the max tack.
So yeah, I fought them for a little while.
I fought them for ages, man.
I was running in and out of shops, hiding behind counters, shooting them more were coming.
It was fucking epic.
There was police, there was police putting roadblocks out like spikes and shit.
I jumped in a car to try and get away and I was like, what the fuck is going on?
All the tires were popped.
So the title, so it was just like around the corners and that, that the dive out of that
jumped in the sea, swam around to like a thing, jumped out there.
Then as I come up the dock, I see a police car fucking hosting.
I was like, fuck, they were chasing another fucking gang.
They were all shooting out the window back at the police.
It felt fucking amazing.
It felt like the living breathing cyberpunk world where it should have been.
And that was always the goal with what, what they were trying to do and what they're trying
to achieve.
Um, so obviously I've always banged on about how good cyberpunk was, but we all know what
cyberpunk wanted to be and what it could be.
And I think it's reached that now from the small update I've played.
I haven't touched anything like you have.
I haven't touched the DLC and obviously there's things that are locked into the DLC that weren't
available to me, like the guns on the cars and skills.
So all that I haven't touched.
I don't want to know a lot, but you know, just do your thing and crack on with what
you want to talk about.
I haven't touched any of the Katana stuff.
I'm more interested in that.
Melee is not my, um, it's not my bank.
Heavy, heavy machinery and fucking juggernaut type shit is the stuff that I've gone for.
So you get like adrenaline.
So if you use it like a health boost or something like that, you basically become like immune
to everything.
That's another thing I noticed actually.
Yeah.
And they took away all the med packs.
So now you've just got one on call down so much better.
I think there's, there's one or two different, different things, but you know, when you'd
have the food and stuff for that and it was like, eat this for such a, yeah, I think they've
just got rid of it because it was becoming very, very tedious.
Cause my, my inventory was constantly just filled with all this food that you're never
going to touch.
You're never going to touch it.
I had like 5 million inhalers.
Why am I going to eat an apple?
Yeah, it's pointless.
Um, so yeah, by the looks of it, they got rid of it.
So I logged in and see that all of my inventory, like my gear was effectively redundant.
So just sold it all because it was, it didn't have anything on it.
Um, all my skills had been reset and I had a little play around, had a little look, any
of the car stuff I haven't gone for because I'm just not massively interested in, in combat
in the vehicles.
I tried it out.
It like, it's good, but it's just not my, like you can get the, the auto lock in thing.
So you don't actually have to aim or anything just as long as that, that blue squares there,
you can fucking, you can attack, which makes life a lot easier.
I think that standard though, because I've got that without having any skills, like pick
for it.
Um, but yeah, the gun feels, it's just, they feel so good.
Cause I'm still using silver hands pistol.
Sick gun.
And it's just, like you say, I'm just constant headshots, headshots, headshots, headshots.
Like it just feels, feels really fucking good.
Um, and looks great as well.
I don't know if they've done anything graphically.
Oh no, they have done stuff graphically because I saw a comparison of Johnny silver hand,
um, like pre patch.
Yeah.
And it looks very fucking good.
Very good.
But there was a specific bit in the DLC, literally nothing crazy, just walking through a building
and like there was, there was just a hole in the wall that you have to duck down and
go through.
And it just looked really, really good, really fucking good.
And I was like, I don't remember it looking this, like this pristine.
Um, I really haven't played much of the DLC really like not a lot, maybe like an hour.
I keep seeing thumbnails pop up on YouTube and I have to just ignore them because I'm
going in completely blind.
I don't want nothing.
It's like a 30 plus hour fucking DLC.
That's what I mean.
The Witcher expansions, they were, they were chunky.
They're known for like the best expansion ever made, bro.
I think Mark's approaching like the halfway mark on it.
He's, he's just fucking smashing it out and they're saying like, it's really fucking good.
So I'm a long way from it because I've got boulders gate to finish and then I, I want
to start a new character on cyberpunk.
So I'm not going to jump in with a character I've got.
So I think a lot of the main, so what, what, uh, what background did you pick on cyberpunk?
Corpo.
Right.
So I picked, uh, Nomad.
So my story starts out in the desert and then I get a little fucking Nomad motor and stuff
like that.
And then you, I, the reason I did that, I remember my exact reasoning.
So I was thinking about it before I come out and I thought, well, cause I've never been
in night city, I thought it'd be cool to start outside night city and then work your way
in.
Yeah.
So that's why I chose that.
But I, I'm not sure how the start of your character starts off, but in the Nomad, you,
you start off, you're in a mechanic shop and you're fixing your car.
And then the sheriff walks in and he's fucking giving you some shit.
Anyway, you drive off into your car and then you meet Jackie.
Do you admit, where'd you meet Jackie in Corpo land?
Uh, I fucking know it's been a while.
Cause you start, you start in Corpo land in a big old building that you're working in.
And I think you just meet Jackie off like you're at work and then you come out and I
think you just, you just meet Jackie cause you, you do a heist.
Yeah.
And then in the, in the Nomad when you meet him in like a little camper van and then you
have to go, you have to, you have to deliver an item of great value to night city in the
city, but you don't know Jackie is you're like being set up to work together and you
have to drive through like customs essentially.
So you drive up and then you have to stop and wait.
And then the customs officer calls you through, you have to go through, sit down in like an
interview room, get questioned about it and stuff like that.
And then when you go through, then you get a car chase and everyone starts shooting at
you and you drive in and you're going through all these things.
But I remember specifically thinking when I was playing the game for the first time,
how do I shoot out the window?
Yeah.
Cause you can't, but I think, um, no, cause you can cause Jackie's driving.
Oh, right.
Yeah.
But now it's going to be completely different because it's just going to feel like clean.
It wasn't clean.
It felt like janky as fuck.
Uh, but I'm not going to pick that anyway, but that was just my thought.
And I just want to experience, I've, there's so many bits in that game that I think are
just going to feel so much better.
And they've tweaked a lot.
There's a lot of secret tweaks into like main missions.
You know that was his face, that geezer that he was talking about the horrible cunt, the
Ripper doc that was fucking up the women and that.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
There's something about they've changed that so you can like really fuck him up now.
Like he deserves and stuff like that.
So they put the old does back in the game.
Nice.
Cause they took them out.
They, um, at the beginning of when it first come out, apparently there was an absolute
influx of dildos, dildos everywhere.
You couldn't, you couldn't move.
There was a lot of dildos and apparently they made the decision to take the dildos out because
it was just cheap humor and it wasn't, it wasn't what was, what it was supposed to be.
So they just removed the dildos.
Well, one of the vendors very early on in the DLC that sells some weapons, nothing crazy
sold a dildo.
I've got a picture of it.
I'll show you a picture.
I do love a big picture of the deal.
It is, it is a big deal though.
It's 19 inches worth of deal.
It's big, big fucker.
Um, apologies for the phone picture, but there's your deal though.
Oh, she's saucy handle and everything.
Yeah.
It looks like a sword.
Yeah.
It's what I am, what I might test out because it's, it's free to change your perks around
everything like that.
You can learn and relearn stuff.
It doesn't, it doesn't cost you anything to do it.
So it makes it very easy to swap and change when you want.
I want to skill into the Katana stuff and see if that can deflect bullets.
Dildo melee finishes.
I want to see if that can, if that can deflect stuff because it says blades and it's technically
a blade.
I'm no, cause there's a blunt weapon.
It'd be a blunt sword.
Because there's also, there is a skill tree for blunt weapons.
So I might have to have a little look.
I'm concerned that the finish of the deal though is not going to be a whack around the
face.
I wonder, imagine that's a hidden little gem there.
Jam it up their ass.
Oh my God.
Saucy.
But it did fuck all damage.
It did like a third of the damage of the other weapons.
Even, I think it even said in the description, like not used for harming your enemies or
something like that.
I really want to play it.
I'm not going to lie.
I really want to play it, but that was a lot of time.
How far are you in?
36 hours.
How long does it take to finish it?
I'm in act one.
Is it my turn to talk?
You're going to be there forever.
That's where I want to stay.
Right.
So well, it's my turn to talk.
So let's start off with a character creation.
I was face to face with the television screen matter of centimeters away.
Yeah.
Looking at your penis.
Yeah.
As Jen walked in.
Like from the kitchen and looked at me and was like, what the fuck are you doing?
And I said, I was trying to, I was trying to find a penis with no foreskin and I couldn't
tell.
Yeah, they have fun with no foreskin.
Yeah, I know, but I couldn't see you.
Couldn't tell.
Right.
So she had to pick my penis.
Oh, okay.
Right.
So yeah, from the drop, I'm just going to say, and I know you're going to rip me for
it and I hear it from other people as well.
If I hear any word that begins with G and rhymes or ends in Oat.
It is by far.
Ladies and gentlemen.
No, this, I've never said this before.
Oh, this is the best game I've ever played.
This is no, no, no.
I've never ever once said that it beats the Witcher.
This is the throne, the witch of free as my number one greatest game I've ever played.
You reckon it's not even in question.
It fucking so far exceeds the witch of free that it's shocking.
Like, and witch of free ruined games for me for years.
I was just like, it's good, but it's not a witcher.
Sam, I know you'll be listening to this and you left us obviously a nice message with
your gaming knowledge.
Specifically, there was a section about the witch of free being the all time best.
I didn't see this.
Did you not?
No.
Patron doesn't fucking notify when you got messages.
So I check every now and then.
Did he say the witcher was the best?
I believe so, yes.
What a guy.
So, yeah, big witch of free.
But you're wrong now.
I want your fucking, after you listen to this, I want your opinion on this.
Has he played Baldur's Gate?
Doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter, does it?
It does if he needs to have some sort of...
It doesn't.
No.
All right, fair enough.
What, what, um, I, because I uninstalled it, not through hatred, just because I wanted
the space.
Um, I haven't played it on controller.
Obviously you're playing on controller and it looks and apparently feels completely different,
more like a third person RPG style because you can actually move around.
That click to move shit.
I can't, I don't like it.
I won't vibe with that.
I, I, I don't, I can't compare it to the computer, obviously, because I didn't play on the computer,
but it feels perfect.
It's, you move the camera to right stick, you move your character with the left stick.
You want to jump, you just press up on the D pad and you can jump.
Yeah, you don't, you didn't have that on PC.
If you wanted to move the camera, use WASD.
None of that.
It's fairly fucking annoying.
You zoom in, you zoom in down and up with the right analog stick.
So if you want to zoom out, just hold down and it'll zoom out.
Which is exactly how it should have worked.
Like literally over the shoulder.
Beautiful view.
Um, and yeah, like I said to you before, turn based isn't my thing, but I'm fucking getting
by.
I'm slaying beasts.
Does it feel overwhelming with the amount of spells or anything?
Like UI wise, what are we, how are we feeling?
So I, I, uh, I've gone in with the mentality that I, cause I watched the video long before
boulders gate, long before I played it for someone's views, but with no spoilers, just
him talking about it.
And it was specifically about players that have never played Dungeons and Dragons or
boulders gate.
And he said, the one thing I can tell you about boulders gate three is if you don't
understand everything, all the systems that's going on, it's fine.
You do not need to know everything.
And that's what I've gone in with.
And there's things that I don't completely understand how it works, but I know it is
working and that's fine.
And there's things that I am now discovering.
Oh, that's how it works.
I genuinely, I, I, I can never see a game beating this.
It is, I don't understand.
I text Connie yesterday saying, look, I'm, I'm in this place.
Um, is it obvious when you're in act two?
Right.
Because I just can't still be act one.
It was like, yes, that's act one.
I was like, I've, there's enough, what I've done is enough content for two games.
Like it feels like.
And the, the honestly, I'd buy people this game just to experience it because it's that
good.
I've obviously you get your followers.
How much did you play?
Roughly.
Uh, I think I put in about 10 something hours, something like that.
It wasn't, I didn't like it.
Yeah.
It was simply the, the, the click to move.
I know I could have just plugged in a controller bloody, bloody bar, but basically in the time
that I did my, my bit of play through other things took me.
I started ESO again.
So I was like, all right, we'll see you later.
I'm going back to ESO.
Yeah.
Well, so the way I describe it to people, cause a lot of people at work have spoke to
me about it.
Cause I'm just mad for it and they don't really play games.
So the only way I can describe it to people that don't play games is like a video game
version of game of Thrones where there's no plot armor for no one.
You know what I mean?
So there's obviously you get your companions.
Um, so far I've killed three companions.
I think I killed one as well.
And, but, but the problem is I haven't learned my lesson.
So the first one, um, you know, you go back to your camp to rest and stuff like that.
Yeah.
I was in my camp, something happened and it was like, you know, giving you options and
dice rolls and stuff like that.
So obviously something was going on.
Uh, and one of my options was basically to lunge at him and do something to defend yourself.
So I did that and I just stabbed him square in the chest.
Yeah.
You done that.
Huh?
Yeah.
So a big old mouth would say, um, yeah, I did that as well.
Yeah.
So he's dead by accident.
I didn't realize that that was, I didn't know that was going to happen.
I was like, fuck, fuck.
So he's dead, dead and that's it.
Now he's gone.
And I actually, we like that character.
So I was like, oh fuck, but I'm making it so it's like, there's no safe scum.
It is what it is.
These are the choices I've made.
This is the way it goes.
So he's dead.
Um, and then I kind of, so I'm not trying to play an evil character, but a lot of choices
are just ending like naughty.
You know, a lot of people are forcing my hand in certain situations.
I'm going to start the download of it again and then plug the controller in and see if
that I am going with it.
I did you make it to like the Druids Grove and all that sort of stuff?
Uh, I don't think so.
Cause there's so much fucking, so much, there's so much shit that you can just explore.
It's incredible.
There's so much shit.
Yeah.
It's honestly, it's I don't know how this exists.
Uh, so yeah, there's this basically, there's like a little war going on between the Druids
and these other people and the goblins and stuff like that.
So I kind of accidentally on purpose decided with the goblin army.
I would do exactly the same thing.
Well yeah.
So I slaughtered absolutely everyone, all the innocent people, they're dead.
Um, and then one of my followers was really not happy with that.
So when that battle started, he turned around and called me a traitor.
So he got the one bang.
So that companion is now dead.
Um, and then another companion I saw, um, I didn't realize they were going to be a companion
and someone gave me an option to kill them for like money and I killed them and they
dropped items that companion carries.
And I was like, fuck.
So I've killed three companions.
Um, so I don't even know if there is any more available.
So I've had to hire one.
So I've got a mage that's been risen.
I've got a, a, a wizard or sorcerer or whatever he is.
It's been risen from the dead, uh, just to fill in a gap basically, because I've killed
that is fantastic.
And the funniest point of it was that there was a point where I killed two companions
and the only two companions I had left hated each other and kept trying to kill each other.
So, oh, and also you have the parasite in your head and I've managed to convince everyone
to eat more.
So you know, it's, it's eight more parasite.
Yeah.
Eat more parasites.
You know, you've got that classic eat more parasites, get more powerful or get out your
head kind of job.
I won't go into all of it, but it's fascinating.
The story is in fralling.
The choices are insane.
Uh, the combat's fucking amazing.
The loop is amazing.
There's no hand holding like I found a forge.
There's no light pop up.
Like this is a forge.
This is how you do it.
You just like, Oh, what goes in here?
Oh, you can put an item in here.
I wonder what you put in it.
I'll put that up a mushroom in it.
Obviously that does nothing.
I'm not retired, but I put it in for a lot.
Mushroom straight in.
So I put something else in, then I did something else.
And then I did something else and it was like, Oh bang, something's happened.
But I worked out on my own.
You know, I banged my head for one evening, uh, for two and a half hours, I was fighting
the same boss.
And the biggest thing I can say about this game is that not for one second have I been
bored or annoyed.
Not one, no game has ever done that to me.
If not for one second, I've been bored or annoyed, not once.
And I banged my head against his boss for two and a half hours.
But every time I fought him, I learned something new.
And I was like, Oh, okay, maybe I'll try that.
All right.
What if I put these companions, I set these up here and then when these spawn, I can,
and everything just worked perfectly.
And I, and there's been so much stuff that I could have missed, but I managed to find
because I've literally gone through everything with a fine tooth comb.
And there's going to be so much stuff that I have missed because obviously, you know,
as you walk around, you might just get a perception roll.
It will just roll itself.
Yep.
And then they failed, failed, failed, failed for all your companions.
And you'll miss a hole in the wall that you can now can't see because you've failed that
thing.
So the game is infinitely replayable with all the classes, all the races, all the choices.
It's absolutely incredible and is quite worthy of number one spot.
And you know, barring an, a crazy fall off for the next fucking however many hours, then
I can't see this ever being defroaned.
The fact that Witcher three is number two now is mental to even say it is.
Baldur's gate free is one of those games where when it first come out, it come out on PC
first.
And I feel like there was a lot of hate towards Baldur's gate free by people who aren't PC
players and they're going to move shit.
And then it's come out on console fully, fully, fully supported, very streamlined where it
no longer is click to move.
It's still turn based, but if I just get the impression that it feels different on that
controller setup than it does through mouse and keyboard.
But it's definitely got that that special sauce about it.
The, the fault that has gone into making this game is absolutely mental.
Cause you, you really can do more or less whatever the fuck you want.
If you can think about doing it, the new chances are you can do it.
I'll give you an example of that exact thing happening.
There was a, I, I, I slaughtered these people, uh, rightfully so I freed them from their
slave masters because I'm not a complete asshole.
I'm actually trying to play a good character, but nevertheless, there's some choices that
are a bit gray.
Um, but I killed this guy.
Some people are happy about it.
Some people weren't, you know, I was trying to lose his body and every time I went to
lose it, it was like, those people are not happy that you're trying to steal off his
body.
I was like, fuck's sake, but he's like a big guy.
So, you know, he's going to have good loot.
He's going to have like important stuff.
How the fuck am I going to get away with this?
So what I did, I split my party up and I had three of them fucking I controlled because
you can split them right so you can have like three follow one or one, one, one, one, whatever
you want to do.
So I split my party up and left my main guy next to the body and I took the other three
off somewhere else and this geezer followed him.
Right.
But the easiest way I could do it is I picked the body up and then I just took him back
to my camp and the body is in my inventory.
So then I just dropped the body in my camp and I looted him there when no one could see
him, but that was the only way I could work out how to get away with with stealing.
But then there was a guy in my camp that weren't too happy about it as well, but he nearly
got slaughtered.
That's what I mean.
You can kill anyone in the game.
It's this nuts.
You can, you can interact with every object.
You see a door, you can fuck it.
It's got a health bar.
Yeah.
You see a bit of paper on the floor.
It's got a health bar.
Do whatever you fucking want.
You can combine items.
You can find items like and everything's got like a cut scene to it.
Like a proper acted cut scene.
So you, you interact with like, I don't, I'm not shit on staff here because I think stuff
was fantastic.
Um, and getting a lot of bad press, which I don't understand.
I think it's really good, but you compare the two and this is why I'm glad I played
bowlers get after, um, and compare the two, you can talk to every single person in this
game and it comes up with stuff, with stuff, you know, they might just give you a little
one line, but it's not like a one line where you walk past them and you press X to talk
on them and it'll just be lots of texts pop up.
They will interact with them.
You'll see their face up close.
They'll say something and it might, you might have dialogue options.
Yeah.
So it's worth talking to someone.
And I said to Connor, because I see him the other day, um, I've never had a game before
where I've walked into like a new town or a new place and I've wanted to go and talk
to everybody.
Normally I'm like, I can't be off to talk to everyone here.
I'm genuinely interested.
I want to go and find out who's who, what the, what the crack is.
Some, some quests lead you miles away doing loads of other stuff.
Some are just quick ones, but not a single quest has ever felt like your normal average
fetches.
There's nothing like that.
This honestly, this game is, uh, this game is going to be talked about for 20, 30, 40
years.
Yeah.
So this is the benchmark now.
This is the benchmark.
I don't care what any developer says.
This is the benchmark and you, you probably are never getting anywhere near it, but that's
what you got aim towards.
That is a phenomenon.
It is, it's an anomaly.
It really is the magnum opus a gaming for me now.
And anything just will pile in comparison.
Um, the advantage of cyberpunk has is I love cyberpunk anyway, and it's a completely different
beast.
I'm talking like RPGs in terms of like Skyrim, which are things like that.
This is the benchmark now.
Um, and like I say, turn based combat and not my thing, but I'm loving it.
I love the turn based combat.
I love the way you can interact with things.
I love the abilities I'm getting.
How do you, how do you set your path when you're doing, when you're in a combat sequence
and you can move your person, how do you move them?
What would you make the same way that you move them normally?
No.
So in combat, obviously it's turn based now.
I know, but you've got a certain amount of steps that you can move position.
Just use your analog stick to point where you want to go and it will go there.
You can press X and he'll run that way.
Oh, and you can just, so if you want to do, if you want to go there, you can just go there
and then press X and he'll run there.
It will show you the line that it will run.
If you want to go round, so you can go round and up and make sense.
Yeah.
I've got a jump or I've got some abilities that let me like teleport somewhere else.
So a lot of, I've got an ability.
I've got it all.
I've got it unlocked now.
I've got my characters.
I know their abilities cause I'm leveling them up and I'm going, right, you've already
got that.
So you don't need that.
I need someone to have this ability.
I've got, uh, my cleric girl.
She's got an ability that can stop her or anyone else being attacked for 10 turns.
Unless they, unless you attack something, you can still get hit by our ways, but you
can't be attacked unless you attack.
So she just automatically wax out on her and she just heals everyone up.
And then I've got my character, which is like a, he's a warlock, but also he's like an archer
melee thing, but he tends to do melee archery more.
Um, soon as the battle starts, he tends to use Misty step, which like you can teleport
anywhere in the battlefield.
So I tried to get somewhere high and then I've got my sorcerer guy who also does the
Misty step somewhere high.
So I got him raining down arrows.
My sorcerer raining down spells, my healer, like basically invulnerable, uh, healing everybody
and buffing them.
And then I've got my warrior, which is, she's just fucking nuts.
She's got loads of hit points.
She does some stupid amount of damage.
She's able to attack twice in one turn and she's got an ability which lets her do that
again.
So she's got a lot of, sometimes really tough enemies.
I can get four attacks on them, wipe them out before they even get a chance to do anything.
Um, so I've got my party is settled.
So even if someone else does pop along, they're going to have trouble getting in.
And I've built relationships with these people now.
I know them.
I know what their motives are.
I know how they work.
I know.
And there's always like party chat.
Oh, and they're talking away to each other, which I love.
Um, apart from my, you know, my sorcerer has been brought back from the dead.
He says nothing cause he's just a walking corpse.
He's just, yeah, he's just a walking corpse.
Cause you can talk to corpses can't you?
Yeah.
I've got an ability to talk to corpses.
I've got an ability to talk to animals.
You know, these are all things you can miss out on.
You don't take the abilities, you know, you can get potions to talk to them, but obviously
then they're, you know, you can talk to dead bodies.
You can talk to, I always talk to animals cause it's great.
Um, and you know, we've come across that squirrel yet.
Yeah.
I know you can.
So I didn't just because I knew what happened.
It's the only clip I'd seen of bombs.
Yeah.
Kicking the shit out of a squirrel.
But then there's like, you know, it's all just checks as well.
You've got the roll dice.
You've got the buzzer that hit in the roll because I'm not safe scum.
And I'm like genuinely like, please, please hit.
You know, there was a lock yesterday.
So obviously you go up to level, uh, you want to hit 20 is the maximum.
Um, and normally it's like a 10 or a 15.
You need to hit, you have it and you can add your bonuses.
So if you roll a nine and you've got a bonus cause of luck, you'll get a plus two, whatnot
and it will add it to it.
So therefore be 11.
But I come up against a door yesterday.
It was 30.
I was like, how is that even possible?
But luckily for me, like the, the, the class I've chosen, the abilities I've chosen, my
character is like, uh, he's made a pact with a dark one or something.
So every now and again, I can use that and call dark ones blessing, which gives me like
a one to 15 chance on abilities.
I managed to roll up 34 and managed to get through this door, which obviously stopped
me from going on some mad quest to find a key.
This thing's basically just cheese it.
But that's just the way the game's going.
Um, yeah, I've made a completely unique character.
I've never had a character that I like the look of this much as well.
He looks phenomenal.
He looks like he, he just fits.
He's perfect.
No, he's an elf.
He's gone for an elf.
He's called rain.
Dolo rain.
Dolo.
Yeah.
So I like, I like the name rain rain.
I just thought of a cool second name.
I thought that sounds cool.
He was brought up on the streets and yeah, that's why I like the fact that he, he, um,
he always looks out for people cause he's like come from scummy place.
So like I say, anyone that needs free and so to speak, he'll always stand up for them
and help them out and try and free them.
But then when it comes to like, like big wars and stuff like that, I was just like, I listened
to both sides of that goblin druid fucking thing and don't get me wrong.
There's a lot of people in that place didn't deserve to die.
But such is such is life.
I think I made a barbarian called dumb ass.
Yeah.
I mean that I'd expect that from you.
Yeah.
Something like that.
And I, and I lent heavy into that dumb, that dumb ass aspect.
Oh, it just, yeah.
Yeah.
I weren't like, especially with doors, when it comes to doors and it wanted you to use
a key or, or open it specific way, I just hit them, just hit the doors, smash them down,
done.
Or like any dialogues where it required any sort of, um, decorum and it gives you the
option to like just be a fucking barbarian.
I'd always go with that.
If I got a fucking doing someone on the edit with a stick instead of fucking talking to
him, that's what I was going with, which made it very fun.
You know me, I'm so into it.
I'm currently reading that.
So it's called dissolution war of the spider queen.
So it's set in the same world as boulders gate.
Um, full on book.
Yeah.
Well, it's fucking loads of them.
Uh, but yeah, I wanted, cause obviously I spoke to Connor about it.
Obviously the Dungeons and Dragons universe is vast.
So you can buy books and not necessarily be in the realm of boulders game.
So I wanted it.
So then there's things in there that I'm reading.
I'm like, oh, I know that that place is in that game and I've heard speak of that person
and Connor's going to be moved in properly soon and he's got room for a, for the old
little fucking D and D.
Yeah.
Well, I'm ready.
My time is now.
And obviously now I spoke to you earlier about weekends should be more free.
Agreed.
So I get more opportunity to do things.
Um, yeah.
Yeah.
So that boulders gate is the best game I've ever played.
I'm not, I'm not saying boulders gate is the goat.
You are?
No, but I'm not just saying, oh, it's the goat.
It's the goat.
It is genuinely the best game I've ever played.
It's the throne, the Witcher, which nothing has since the Witcher three came out in 20
fucking 16 or whatever.
Um, and yeah, I'm, I'm very happy that I'm 36 hours in on act one and I don't care how
long it takes because there's not been one moment.
I don't want to know.
I do though.
Well, don't tell me.
I won't tell you.
I know probably the average, but I don't even want to know what the average is.
Please do not mention anything.
Do not look me in the eyes.
Do not say anything because I want the game to end when it ends.
Not because I've gone, I don't want to keep looking at my play time.
I know I must be, I don't want to know how long the average is.
No, don't tell me I'll be pissed.
I'll genuinely be angry.
Don't tell me.
I said this to Connie yesterday.
I don't want to know.
I just want to know if I'm out of act one.
Do you want to know how long act one takes?
No, I don't want to know anything.
I want to just play it and let enjoy it.
And that's the way it goes.
Anyone listening, if you like the witch of three or any games like that, don't be put
off by the term base thing.
It is amazing.
The best game I've ever played.
Isn't it like a, a quick slot wheel type.
Yeah.
You got radio wheels.
Yeah.
You don't have to.
It's very intuitive.
I'd the only one thing I would say that's a bit annoying is if you're looking in your
inventory is just so much stuff.
And I'm just like, I've got potions for this.
I've got scrolls for that.
I've got books.
I don't know whether I should be picking this up.
I don't know where, you know, I don't want to leave anything behind because I don't know
what, if it needs, it'd be used later in time.
And honestly, there's just so many things I could talk about this happened.
Like a fucking smile.
Look at him.
There's a, so when we, when we last properly spoke about it, you was of the mindset where
much like myself, we never said it was a bad game or that we thought it was going to be
a bad game.
We always knew it was going to be fucking decent.
However, you did say that you didn't think at the time that you would finish it, that
you would love it and you would get a portion of the way through and like myself, just go,
I've had enough.
I've done what I wanted to do.
This is a great game, but I'm just not going to commit the time to it.
That, um, was that mindset changed?
Do you believe you'll finish it?
You're going to finish it.
It's not like the divinity original sin two, which is made by Larry and as well, same thing,
sadly, the same sort of game.
I don't remember dice rolls.
It was more just like skill checks.
Um, but I had no understanding of what was going on.
I love, I love brute force my way to like get anywhere in that game.
And I was fluking it and I'd avoid combat at all times because I just couldn't do it.
Now I've like, now I understand.
Um, and I'm paying attention to resistances and joint campaigns on both as well.
It is a genuinely a marvel.
I don't, I don't understand how they've made this.
Well, it took a long time.
Yeah.
Took a very, very long time.
But even so star fields took the best part of 10 years.
So where's, where's star fielding?
What was Larry and running within the meantime with boulders when boulders gate, while they
were making that, what was it?
Well, divinity original sin two is their last big release.
Yeah.
I feel like it's a, it is a, I feel like you've got, you've got the community that is the
larion community and that Dungeons and Dragons type, um, world, which had never really mixes
all too much with the rest of the game and world.
They're like their own entity, like the warhammer people, they never really mixed with, with
everyone else.
Right.
And then you just got like the fucking, the FIFA idiots in the corner, that type of shit.
Um, and I feel like what happened is boulders gate free come out.
And then all those other people that never mixed with any of the fucking typical nerdy
people because the biggest fucking, um, fucking time in the, in the shining in the light with
like things like Dungeons and Dragons with people who had never played it before was
stranger things.
When that come out, obviously they, that was their thing.
They played Dungeons and Dragons.
So I feel like that sort of like introduced the side that you don't really see of that
of DND to, to the people that maybe thought that it was too nerdy.
When boulders gate free come out, it did the same thing.
People were able to experience Dungeons and Dragons to an extent without actually having
to commit to it because you just know that there's a lot of people out there who go,
I'm not playing that.
It's ridiculous.
I'm never going to play Dungeons and Dragons too nerdy, but they'll play boulders gate
free on the slide on the slice, sorry, because like there are people like that.
And I feel what happened is where those worlds mixed, the people that have never experienced
DND before any like term based style of game, I have a really enjoyed it or was so confused
that they just turned to hatred rather than fucking speculation.
Rather than, rather than being intrigued by it.
It's just immediate hate.
I can't play this game.
I don't understand it.
It's shit.
And that's why you had a lot of the bad press about it from people that it just didn't matter
because it is such a, like you say, it's the pinnacle and where the bar is now set in terms
of game development like that, that the effort that they put into that game, it was a point
I'm trying to make is just, it's very cool to have all of the worlds of gaming mix into
one to experience this thing that is so incredibly different and pathway creating for, like you
say, the next decade, two decades, three decades.
It's crazy.
It really is.
It's mental.
What they've done is nothing short of incredible.
They're, like I say, the constant interacting with just random things and they're being
like a little cut scene dedicated to it or, you know, you just don't get that in games
nowadays and I remember us talking about it before, when Baldur's Gate got bought forward.
It was like, that's smart getting out of the way of Starfield.
That's smart.
I think this might win Game of the Year.
Also it's 97 on Metacritic.
It's the highest rated PC game of all time and it's the same on PS5.
I feel that Baldur's Gate has a very, very strong contender for Game of the Year.
I don't think Starfield has a touch near Game of the Year.
I thought it would, but I don't think it is.
I don't think it does.
Baldur's Gate 3, I still think that Hogwarts Legacy has a decent chance just because of
how fucking quirky it is and how different.
At the moment, I'd say it's between Tears of the Kingdom and Baldur's Gate.
I think Tears of the Kingdom has dropped off.
Before any of this, I would have said Tears of the Kingdom.
Looking at the line up of games this year, I would have said Tears of the Kingdom have
gotten nailed because it's Zelda and Zelda is going to wipe the floor after Breath of
the Wild did.
Then after Tears of the Kingdom, I would have said it would be Starfield.
I don't think you see that happening now.
A lot of discord around that.
People are not too keen and not happy.
I see it in the funniest Reddit post.
I had to laugh out loud yesterday.
It just notified me on my phone for some reason.
It came up saying, after 500 hours of Starfield, I finally see what everyone else is saying
that there is nothing to do.
You've played the game for 500 hours and there's nothing to do.
Yeah.
So what have you been doing for 500 hours?
Because you've done it all, you silly cunt.
But what have you been doing for 500 hours if there's nothing to do?
I love it when people do that.
When they've put in literal days and days and days and days of fucking time into a game
and then they go like shit.
You've just sunk a thousand days into it.
What do you mean it's shit?
I really, really like Starfield.
So I'm not fussed what people say.
And the Fezda games, they're an incubating sort.
They will last a long time.
You got to wait for the mods.
It's 41 days.
Has it been out for 41 days?
Maybe it was a satire post.
I don't know.
Probably it must have been because I read in that I just laughed and closed it.
But those types of people do exist where because obviously when you look on Steam, you can
the reviews, it tells you how long the people that are reviewing it have played that game.
So you can actually, you could, whereas if I might turn around to you and say, oh, Baldur's
Gate is one of the best games in the world.
I definitely recommend it.
Or I'm sitting there going, oh, Baldur's Gate shit.
You look at my play time, you see like nine, 10 hours.
It's not a coherent enough assessment.
I haven't played it long enough.
Whereas if you see someone, I don't know, someone like Connor, maybe who has been playing
Act one since you first been allowed to, he's probably got like thousands of hours there.
If he turns around and says the game's good, game's probably good because he's got the
fucking time.
You with the witch of three.
If you say it's good, then it must be good because you look at your play time.
Shit like that.
If you see with something like ESO or World of Warcraft, you look at my play time, it
is decent.
I feel bad saying, you know, you mentioned the witch of three and I just got a pang of
guilt.
You've abandoned it.
I got a pang of guilt.
Absolutely abandoned it.
I haven't.
It's still a second favorite game of all time.
This is a game that, is that a wash was about, no fuck off.
The trouble I have with Baldur's Gate.
Geralt of Rivia is.
He's the goat.
Little eyes twitching because you know, you know that what you're saying is dirty.
It's wrong.
No, it's right.
It's disgusting.
You've got to be true to yourself.
My problem with Baldur's Gate.
Henry Cavill's crying.
Most games, well I say most games because no games really do this.
Maybe just The Witcher.
But I, the intrigue and nosiness always hits the better of me.
And in Baldur's Gate, there's like, you know, there's a narrator that narrates over there,
which is an amazing voice.
Very good.
Perfect.
It's fantastic.
In Divinity Original Sin, it's a guy who's got a really nice voice as well.
I correct me if I'm wrong.
Oh, you won't be able to, but I'm pretty sure the reason I like Baldur's Gate 3 so much
more than Divinity.
One because I know, I'm knowing how it works.
Two, the camera angle is just beautiful.
And three, when you talk to people in Divinity, I don't think it like goes in there like a
cut scene.
I think it's just, you're still just standing where you was.
And then the dialogue comes up, not as interested, not as engaging.
I forgot what I was saying.
Oh yeah.
So the problem is with me is I can't, so an example, walked up to a barn, went to open
it and then just like any other door and then it went into like a little cut scene.
And I was like, oh, what's this?
And it was like, someone's getting slaughtered inside.
Yeah, you know, someone's getting fucked up.
And then, and there are, right.
There's like, you hear loud groaning and blah, blah, blah.
And then one of my followers was like, I don't think we should open that door.
I was like, I can't not.
I need to know.
So I open the door and you know what's there, like a troll and a fucking...
Minotaur thing.
Yeah.
Just getting...
Going at it.
Yeah.
Getting rooted.
And yeah, I said some things they didn't like it and then they attacked me.
They killed me.
But I was like, well, I've got to stick to that decision now.
So I loaded it back up again and stuck to the decision.
And I had to kill them both and I felt terrible.
But that has happened to me so many times, even last night.
It was like the narrator was like, you probably shouldn't go in here.
All my followers like, you shouldn't go in here.
And then something else, which I won't mention was like, don't go in there.
I was like, now I have to go in there.
So I went in there and I regretted it, but I had to.
Because I can't not know what's behind that door now.
I have to go in.
Was it a mistake?
Absolutely.
But it would work exactly the same way if they was all standing there going, you might
as well go in there and check it out.
You go, all right, I'll go in.
I know.
Easily influenced.
In this game, much like Divinity Original Sin 2, I remember in that game, there was
like a spider woman thing you could talk to.
I spoke to her and she was like, I can give you a great power.
Just let me bite you.
Let me have a bit of your blood or whatever it was.
And as I just said, maybe a male was like, well, I can't turn down.
You can't turn that down.
Go on, have a nibble.
Go on.
It's not my arm.
Have a bite.
Go on.
So we had a bite.
And yeah, I think he gave me something or she gave me something shit.
I can't remember what it was, but then it just gives you like a permanent, I can't remember.
It was just complete made up.
Just like a permanent minus five to speed or something.
Then like plus two to strength, just to say for example.
And I was like, well, that's shit.
So I reloaded it and didn't do that again.
But this time I'm not reloading.
So whatever decisions I make, they stay.
And that makes the game so much better and more impactful because my decisions matter
as opposed to just save scum in.
It really means saying, so when I've killed all them followers, I could have just reloaded
and not done that.
But I was like, no, this is the story that's being told by this is rain dolo story, right?
I'm going to do another character.
I am going to do another character.
It won't be so straight after this for sure.
Cause this is fucking a long time coming.
But I will do another character.
I'll probably do a sorcerer next time.
I'll probably play as one of the already made characters.
Cause you can have that and then it's even more fucking immersive.
So yeah, I know what character I'll play as well.
So yeah, I've just, this is his story.
So not reloading, which I've always done in games is, is changing my complete mindset
on how these games should be played.
Even in the Witcher, if I made a decision I didn't like, I just reload it.
But it takes away so much from the game.
So it takes away the whole immersion.
Cause I'm guilty of doing that.
I've done that a lot with starfield.
I'm telling you now, don't do that no more.
Just go with your gut reaction and be like, fuck man.
Yesterday I was in a building, big thing.
They're like, give me this.
I know you got it.
And I was like, I know if I say no, you're going to aggro on me.
And then I'm going to have to kill you.
And yeah, but not just you, everyone in this whole fucking fort is going to aggro on me.
But I cannot give you this thing.
So I said no.
And I had to kill every single person, every single one, even the dogs and the wolves and
everything in there.
Right.
But I could have just reloaded it and just say, well, I'll see what it does first.
No, no, no, fuck that.
No, this is it now.
I'm stuck here until I get out.
And that honestly, take it from me as someone who does the same as you, that makes the game
so much better because you're just like, well, this is what I've chosen.
This is, this is my path.
I can't change it.
This is, this is it.
And I've always reloaded, but now I don't do that no more.
And this means so much more.
Maybe that's how, well, I think that is just how those types of, or like Bethesda games,
things like that.
That's how they're supposed to be played.
And like you say, both guilty of, of save scumming.
But also not just that.
I think I've always played me writing games.
I've not called myself Ash, but I've always played, well, what would I do?
I always do that as well.
And I need to change that.
I'm not doing that.
I'm just doing what I think my character would do.
Obviously you create your backstory, you create your character, you create your race, much
like in starfield and you go, right.
So my starfield guy was a bounty hunter who grew up on the streets of neon, which is supposed
to be rough.
So he's going to do anything for money, but he's going to have morals cause he'd come
up much like rain dolo, right.
You grew up in the streets of boulders, gay.
He was a pattern.
Yeah.
It was a, he's a ruffian, but, and that's why in my head he is, you look out for other
people, people that have been oppressed.
Cause there's a lot of them.
A lot of the gnomes are being forced to the Robin hood of the world.
Yeah.
A lot of gnomes in that are being forced to mine and she, I don't, I don't release him.
I say release him.
What are you going to do about it?
And I'm like, what's this?
Use my force powers or whatever I do.
But when it comes to fucking, when it comes to like, you know, big decisions, I'll just
go, what, I just go, what I think he would do, you know, as opposed to what I would do.
And it makes it so much more interesting.
It really does.
It's completely changed the way I look at RPGs.
Well, that's the name of them isn't it?
Role playing games, you're role playing.
You are not playing.
I love, but I always thought I was role playing, but I wasn't.
I was just choosing what I think I would do.
Yeah.
And that's not the way I want to play.
You have to sit there and you have to go, what would this person do?
Cause you're creating a story there.
Exactly.
There's been choices in the game that I've wanted to choose, but I'm like, but it doesn't
fit with what he would do.
I know he wouldn't do that in my head.
He wouldn't choose that.
It makes no sense to all the other decisions that you've made.
You wouldn't do that.
Yeah.
So I have to not do that.
And that's frustrating, but also exciting.
And then another cool thing about this, I know this sounds, I know it sounds so nerdy
and weird.
And there's the whole point.
We're running a gaming podcast.
Yeah.
But this is like next level.
The cool thing is I've created this guy now, Rain Dolo.
I'll always remember him, Bowlers gate is where he come from.
That's where he lives.
If we all go and play D and D, I could create Rain Dolo.
Oh yeah.
And he can have his own campaign.
But in my head, I know what he looks like.
I know what he's done.
You know, it's just, it's through your, your backstory for Rain Dolo.
If we go and play D and D with Conrad is, is that you have a backstory already made,
you know what I mean?
Your gaze has already been on an adventure.
It was already there.
He's, he's, he's the Gandalf.
He's got a history there.
It's a past that, that you might, you might divulge in, but you also might keep it to
yourself because you might've done some stuff.
You might've, you know what I mean?
But he's so sick.
He's got, he's got a, he's got circumcised penis.
Love it.
Medium sized.
He's got the Ragnar Lofbrook haircut, you know, shaved around the sides with a tied
up ponytail coming down and it like, and the hair physics, I wobble as you're moving.
I've got a red cape that I wear, which is the red Prince cape.
Cause I bought the deluxe version, which gives you the red Prince cape and the red Prince
is from Divinity Original suit.
So he's the lizard.
So I've got his red cape.
I've got this sick armor.
I've got like, I've got a hood.
I toggle off, I don't like helmet stuff.
But I've got a hood that I can just turn invisible.
I've got an ability.
I can turn invisible, but as soon as I move invisibly wears off.
This one doesn't.
So I can turn invisible and run about and that, uh, and uh, he looks fucking see he's
got free.
You've got free light swallows tattooed here.
You've got fuck off big scar down.
You've got to put the scar over your eye.
It's gangster.
Um, and I've just, uh, I just unlocked a new ability, which I haven't used yet.
Not on my guy on the sorcerer.
He can turn himself into like a gas form so I can, it's like sleep through cracks and
stuff.
Yeah.
Oh, that's cool.
So what?
So anyway, nothing's told to you.
So you find like holes in the world, like it'd be perception.
Oh, there's a hole there.
You go, all right, I can't fit through there.
Where the fuck did you get in there then?
Yeah.
It's down to your own fucking, your own mind to figure that one out.
Maybe mate, but there's loads of holes.
And I think if you play like a dwarf or a gnome or whatever, I think you can get through
it.
Yeah.
But then there's also like, I've got the ability to conjure a mage hand.
So I literally conjure a mate, a hand and you can fly around and interact with levers
and stuff like that.
I can just fly in there and have a look.
This is a game where you can pick up children and throw them.
You can do anything.
You can throw, you can throw people.
Most games, right.
You can pick up bodies and put them in your pocket.
Games are scared of putting children in.
Yeah.
Terrified of doing it.
And I understand why, but that village, there's, the children are slaughtered.
I didn't do it.
I would.
But there's dead children and stuff.
I know that's, that's mental, but they're there and it's not like fucking, oh, it's
a good kid, but it's just, that's why it's game of thrones.
There's no hold bar.
I understand.
I would because you can't.
So many games, like you say, they're so scared to cross that line with it.
And yeah, well, high on life, that fucking annoying little kid that you can shoot in
the face.
Oh yeah.
Everyone wanted to shoot him in the face because you're not allowed to.
You're not allowed to shoot me.
You can't kill me.
I fucking can.
Boom.
Done.
And things like boulders gate, bro.
You've got the option to put a bullet in someone's head that I'm not supposed to be allowed
to put a bullet in their head.
This is a game by the way, not talking real life because I don't, you know what I mean?
You kind of have to, you have to at some point there just for the fun of it.
When I was taking on this goblin arm or when I was with this goblin army, right?
Um, I couldn't work out.
I didn't really know how to start a fight.
Well, I did and it started, but I was like, have I fucked this up?
There's no goblins with me.
I've I'm taking on a whole camp on my, on myself, like the whole place.
And there's I've been here and I've spoke to every person in this place.
They're fucking, there's millions.
I'm fucked.
And I didn't, I couldn't do combat and I had no abilities.
I could like run and hit and miss.
There's all that was happening.
And then that's when my follower turned on me.
So I give him the quick one bang and then all of a sudden it wasn't a one bang.
It was multiple quick one bang.
Fuck off.
Um, wetty.
Yeah, he was a wetty.
I'm glad I didn't want him anyway, but I wouldn't have killed him.
Give him the quick one bang.
Um, and then all of a sudden, cause you know, you've got like the little character tiles
at the top tells you who's turning his next.
That just went all these goblins fucking trolls turn up throwing barrels at the thing.
They're all rushing in.
I was like, Hey, it felt like a problem was, but then I got down to a point it was like,
right now you need to go and kill X, Y, Z.
I was like, all right, cool.
Went down there.
I was like, fuck, this is far and above my ability.
I can't kill all these.
They're fucking me up.
So what I'd do, I put rain dolo on top of a pillar and wade him going visible.
And then the other two just kept running away.
Run, run, run, run, run.
And they were getting chased.
Uh, and all I did was lead them to more goblins.
Yeah.
And then the goblins, the goblins had like explosive barrels on their back.
So when they got to near the goblins, I just fucking blew the goblins up and killed everybody
just used them as fucking cannon fodder.
But that was my brain thinking.
And much like you, I am the same.
We're very similar in games where I can do anything.
I get paralyzed and I'm like, I can't, I'm dumb.
I don't know in this game.
I'm not dumb.
I, I'm thinking I'm sitting there.
I love that.
Cause it's not, it's not, it's turn-based.
I can just sit there and be like, right, let's have a look around.
What's about that?
That falls down.
It gives you, it gives you the absolute freedom to, to do like literally just like exactly
what you just said.
You, you enter into a combat, um, into, into, well just into combat and yeah, you've got
the time to sit there, look at your surroundings, which you can freely look at and decide what
it is that you need to do.
And yeah, if you, if you die during that combat, you come back and you, you do it again.
There's a different approach, which, which, um, is the whole point of the game.
I really need a wee.
Last thing.
Go on.
I love using, I haven't, I've took the spell off now, but one of my go-to spells was my
cleric summoned like rain.
So she just summoned a big puddle of rain and then rain dolo would just fucking cool
down some lightening.
Oh sick.
Just zap everyone in the fucks of it.
But then obviously me being stupid, I've been like brilliant.
They're all nearly dead.
So I'd send my warrior in there to finish him off and she's just like, and that's my
level of smartness.
But yeah, greatest game ever made.
Not even close.
If you ever thought about playing again, let's fucking get it.
If you didn't think about playing again, like they still get it.
It's the best ever.
It is what we would call the goat.
It's genuinely the goat.
This is now what people, games are being matched up against for me.
So rip anything else is game over man.
It's just, yeah.
You've heard it here first, later rather than not first, definitely last, but last.
You've heard it here last.
Boulders gate free.
That's your bit our motto.
You've heard it here last.
Right.
We're going to go and do the patron.
So enjoy that.
See you later.
Uro.
I'm frozen