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Oh, God. Oh, my God.

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I just kind of know.

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What are your poops like?

4
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I'm kind of picturing you just like on the dog crawl across the carpet.

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I mean, you don't have to imagine that we've seen it.

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I do like a sexy Marilyn Monroe crawl across the carpet.

7
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Oh, gross.

8
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With poop on my thighs.

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Oh, I want everybody to like watch blonde,

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but then just imagine my face on Marilyn Monroe.

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We can probably we got a deep fake you in there.

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That'd be great. We got you know, we got the technology.

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We have a Peter that might actually make that movie watchable.

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I hear it's kind of rough.

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Pretty bad. Yeah.

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But if my face was on the lady body, mm hmm.

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Let me hide. Oh, my God.

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It was fine. I just met.

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I'm just talking about the the emotional roller coaster we're about to go through

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and go from last the last episode to this episode.

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Yeah, one was really implying that we all have emotions here.

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Mm hmm. Fair. I meant for our listeners.

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Oh, yeah. They're invested at this point.

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I don't think our listeners have emotions either.

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I don't think we have listeners.

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There's at least some bots that watched our.

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Yeah, they went to town on that one video.

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Fifty eight views or something.

29
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It's like 90 now. Oh, damn. All right. Well.

30
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What do we have more bots?

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Good question. I think.

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Can we please watch some of our other videos?

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Which video is it?

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It was the it can happen to you.

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I was kind of hoping it was the 9-11 one because that would be weird.

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That would have been actually really weird.

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That would have been awesome if it was like a bunch of people

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kind of Googling 9-11 stuff, just trying to 9-11 the facts.

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I mean, it was. Welcome to cage match.

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This is you really struggled with that one today.

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This is this is Sean, your bemused host with my co-host Nick

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and our producer Peter. Hello.

43
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Who was infinitely patients patient with our chicanery until not last week

44
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until he's not. Is it chicanery?

45
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Yeah. Chicanery.

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Oh, I don't know. Chicanery.

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Sean Connery. Sean Connery.

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Thank you for being with our Sean Connery today.

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Always, always patient with your Sean Connery.

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Especially Zardoz era Sean Connery.

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I love me some Zardoz era Sean Connery.

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So great. Let's talk about that movie.

53
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Yeah. I wish I had a giant floating head that just vomited guns out for me

54
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every morning. That movie is unhinged.

55
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I don't I don't need this, but you want it.

56
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It'd be entertaining.

57
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This is this is the speed this podcast is going to go today.

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Nope. We're going to pick it up.

59
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We got things going on. Oh, yeah.

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Yeah. Do you want to talk about the bad one or the good one?

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Oh, yeah. Let's let's let's.

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So we're just going to give up give up the ghost here.

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This week, we are putting head to head

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Paul Schrader's 2014 Dying of the Light thing.

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I was trying to think of a kind word to put in front of it.

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And just sounded like you forgot what we were doing here again.

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No, no. And 1993's Romp.

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Red Rock West. Red Rock West.

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When walk. Red Rock Rest.

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Yeah, this is that.

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I mean, that's going to be most of the jokes in this episode.

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I would like to talk about Red Rock West first.

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1993, Nick Cage plays drifter Michael,

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who after driving 1200 miles to get a job on an oil rig

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and not getting it because of his bum knee, spends his last five dollars

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to get to Red Rock while looking for bar back work is mistaken for Lyle

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played by Dennis Hopper, an assassin

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who didn't show up.

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And Nick Cage is offered $10,000,

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$5,000 upfront to murder Larifin Boyle's character,

81
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Suzanne, by her husband, JT Walsh's Wayne.

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Hilarity ensues.

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Shenanigans ensue. Sean Connery. Sean Connery ensues.

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Every time Nick Cage, you know, gets he goes over to the house.

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She offers him twice as much money.

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He takes that, writes the sheriff a letter saying, you know,

87
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bar owners trying to kill his wife.

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You should probably look into that.

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Throws it in the mail because time is of the essence and

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scoots out of town.

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Only did a drifter drive into the hospital.

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And when the sheriff shows up to ask questions and guess who it is,

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it's the bar owner, Wayne.

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And it's all just a wacky adventure from there.

95
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It is a very thinly veiled like farce.

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This whole thing is just like a dark farce.

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It really doesn't like drive big jokes or anything.

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No, everything leads back to Red Rock.

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And they're like five times he gets out of town

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only to immediately get driven right back to town.

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Wayne drives him out of town to kill him in the middle of the forest.

102
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He gets away, runs off, is almost hit by Lyle, the actual assassin,

103
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who not only drives him back to Red Rock, drives him back to Wayne's bar

104
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and is insulted that Nick Cage won't have a drink with him.

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What's the name of that tabletop game?

106
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Fiasco. Fiasco. It's Fiasco.

107
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Like everything about this is Fiasco.

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It's a Coen Brothers film without witty dialogue.

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It is written by a pair of brothers.

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That's also true. Yeah.

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And directed by one of those brothers whose name is John.

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John John. John Dahl. Yeah.

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Who mostly has only who's directed a lot of television.

114
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And he got his start directing a bunch of cool in the gang music videos.

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That's that's pretty astounding. Yeah.

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Doll's first film, Kill Me Again, was about Kilmer.

117
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Was it? Yeah, I believe he was in that.

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Well, the reason Nick Cage took this role

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and this is my one fun fact for this movie is because his uncle,

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Francis Ford Coppola, really liked Dahl's first film,

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Kill Me Again, and said, Nick Cage should take should do it.

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I mean, I think you said it right, Nick.

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You know, this doesn't lead to a lot of big jokes.

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It happens. It happens at a clip.

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There's a lot of turns leading back to Wedwalk.

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Wedwalk. Michael gets seduced by Laura Flynn Boyle's character real quick.

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They're on the run out of town.

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No money. And she wants to stop for a beer, which turns into tequila.

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Yeah, it turns into the comfort in wants to stop for a beer,

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but she wants to use his money, too.

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It's like he just saved her ass.

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They're getting gas.

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And she's like, how are you going to pay for that?

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And he's like, well, I got like 80 bucks.

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And she's like, let me see your wallet.

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And then just looks at his ID to like make sure she knew who he was,

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takes his money and says, like, I'm getting a drink.

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Yeah. Like, bitch.

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I mean, technically, he just took, you know,

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$10,000 of hers to kill her husband, which he also didn't do.

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Well, whatever. She deserved it.

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Yeah. And all the money and his gun is in his.

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Impounded vehicle. Impounded vehicle.

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Oh, and the guy he ran over had two slugs in the chest.

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Hence why the sheriff showed up and was like, well,

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you clearly tried to kill this man.

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I love the enthusiasm you have right now.

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I have nothing left in the tank today.

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He like this is this is going to be a Nick episode.

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Oh, Jesus.

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I mean, talk about some of the performances.

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Do do the the ancillary characters and then talk some of the cagey bits.

153
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Dennis Hopper Lyle is pretty fun.

154
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I love the Lyle energy. Yeah.

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So he he just like gets in that car.

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He's like, you know, big Texas attitude. Yeah.

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And everything's just like when he's talking about being a Marine

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and Nick Cage is like, oh, yeah, I was Marine too.

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And like they do a little who thing together.

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Let me buy you a beer.

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And he's like, oh, no, I don't I don't want to be.

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Oh, you won't even let me buy you a beer.

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Like just real offended that he couldn't be hospitable.

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Yeah. To somebody is like.

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Which immediately turns around into I'm going to kill you in the bathroom

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when I found find out you took the money that was meant for me to kill a lady.

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Yeah, sure. Oh, yeah. OK.

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Talk about the truck driver.

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Oh, the truck driver and truck driver was cool.

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So when Nick Cage escapes the bathroom, he like climbs through the window

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and Lyle and Wayne come into the bathroom trying to find him

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because that's they knew where he was.

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They see that the windows open.

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So he climbed out the window.

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They go outside and they're looking around out back

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and looking around all over for him.

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Nick Cage climbed up the HVAC and he was on the roof.

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And he takes this two by four and extends it out across the roof

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onto the top of this semi truck.

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And he he like tight ropes across that and it like doesn't even flex.

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So pretty good two by fours they had back in the 90s, 80s, 90s, 93, 93.

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Yeah. And gets over onto the top of this truck and escapes.

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And, you know, Lyle, you know, kind of figures out like, oh, he

184
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he must have gone on the roof.

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So he's on the roof and he sees Nick Cage on top of this truck as they drive away

186
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down the road.

187
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Nick Cage just knocks on the driver's side window from on top.

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And it's like, hey, I'm out here.

189
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And the truck driver has to like slam on the brakes and.

190
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Nick Cage holds on pretty well. Yeah, he does.

191
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I mean, he must have expected it.

192
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And besides, he's got a bum knee, not a bum hand.

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Quit discounting him. Nick Cage is good at things.

194
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I will. I mean, I will say this is probably the most buff cage we've seen.

195
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No, I don't know.

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He was doing those one on pushups in the middle of the highway

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in that open opening scene.

198
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Yeah. But do you remember Birdie when he popped that top off?

199
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That's true. Come gutters.

200
00:10:01,020 --> 00:10:03,220
So this is like five, six years later.

201
00:10:03,260 --> 00:10:05,420
Yeah, he's lost it a little bit. Looking pretty good, though.

202
00:10:05,460 --> 00:10:06,220
Yeah, he looks fine.

203
00:10:06,220 --> 00:10:11,460
He looks like somebody who could have arguably been in the military at some.

204
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:15,840
Yeah. So he like the truck driver pops out of the truck

205
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and he like puts a gun up to Nick Cage's face.

206
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I just feel good.

207
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There is some shit like that.

208
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Nick Cage is like, no.

209
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:26,520
And then the truck driver is like, what are you doing over here?

210
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He's like, oh, well, I was in the bar.

211
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My wife showed up and she was real angry.

212
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So I just dipped out and like had to hide.

213
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So I like caught a ride on your truck.

214
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And the guy's like, I don't fucking believe that.

215
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You're full of shit.

216
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:43,240
And he's like, no, you've never met my wife.

217
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So he drops him off in the middle of nowhere on this like in front of this house.

218
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And the house being that of Suzanne and Suzanne, because he now that Lyle's in town,

219
00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:55,780
he's got to warn Suzanne that, hey, this guy's actually coming to kill you.

220
00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:59,320
Yeah. Which I do like those two playing off each other.

221
00:10:59,340 --> 00:11:03,260
There's a lot of back and forth when he's like trying to get her

222
00:11:03,260 --> 00:11:07,920
to hurry the fuck up and get out of the house or to hide because Lyle is right outside.

223
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:09,920
And she's just fighting him on it.

224
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He's like, just go hide on the porch.

225
00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:13,200
Like, what do you what do you want me to do?

226
00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:14,360
Get a divorce.

227
00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:18,500
Oh, yeah. You're putting two different conversations together there, but.

228
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:19,800
Yeah, either way.

229
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That's that's the thing about this movie.

230
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It goes at such a clip and it all just meshes together.

231
00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:28,140
But then so Lyle shows up, he Nick Cage

232
00:11:28,140 --> 00:11:30,940
beans Lyle on the face with a trophy or something.

233
00:11:30,980 --> 00:11:33,640
Yeah. He just whips it right across the room.

234
00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:35,480
Good aim on him. Yeah.

235
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Lyle goes down, doesn't go for the like Nick Cage doesn't go for the gun.

236
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They just book it in a Jeep with no gas, which is kind of the running theme

237
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of this film is always out of gas. Yeah. Story of my life.

238
00:11:47,260 --> 00:11:50,460
Yeah. It was actually after he hit him with that statue.

239
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That's when Leroy Boyle's like, my husband's trying to kill me.

240
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And she's like, well, what am I supposed to do?

241
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It's like, well, if I were you, I'd get a divorce.

242
00:11:58,100 --> 00:11:59,880
That was my quote for this one.

243
00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:02,080
Oh, yeah. That's a good one. Yeah. Well, my quote.

244
00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:05,040
So her plan is to like run off to Mexico with Nick Cage.

245
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:09,340
And when all the cards are on the table, she's like turned on him

246
00:12:09,700 --> 00:12:11,140
and she's like, we can still go to Mexico.

247
00:12:11,140 --> 00:12:14,140
And he just goes, fuck Mexico.

248
00:12:14,140 --> 00:12:16,320
It does have some good little lines in this movie.

249
00:12:16,540 --> 00:12:19,640
He is only like he is just there for this movie.

250
00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:23,760
He makes no decision in this film other than to go back to the house

251
00:12:24,020 --> 00:12:25,760
that drives this story.

252
00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:27,720
It just kind of happens around him.

253
00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:30,700
All the driving points and all the character, like all the character arcs

254
00:12:30,700 --> 00:12:32,160
in this are everyone else.

255
00:12:32,160 --> 00:12:35,800
And he's just in the middle of it very much like a Mad Max movie.

256
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:40,200
Mad Max, for more, I was going to say, like a USA, like 90s TV show,

257
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:45,180
like Renegade shows up in a small town, solve small town problems, moves on.

258
00:12:45,300 --> 00:12:47,640
He's like the Incredible Hulk. Yeah.

259
00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:51,120
I mean, this very much felt like they could have just made more of these films.

260
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,720
Just random schmo shows up to town.

261
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:55,180
Shit goes sideways.

262
00:12:55,180 --> 00:12:58,780
I mean, you could find that like all over the place, like that theme.

263
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:01,580
Yeah. Right. And it's still popular now, too.

264
00:13:01,580 --> 00:13:04,020
It's like Reacher is really no different.

265
00:13:04,020 --> 00:13:06,620
And that was that's what I was thinking of when I watched this.

266
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:10,060
I mean, all in all, I thought it was very enjoyable.

267
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,460
Yeah, I thought it was a really good movie. It was fun.

268
00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:16,660
Like there's nothing so terrible in it to like tear down and make fun of.

269
00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:21,140
I mean, Laura Flynn Boyle is like, well, there's a reason

270
00:13:21,140 --> 00:13:22,740
you don't see a lot of her now.

271
00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:25,140
She wasn't that entertaining to watch.

272
00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:29,180
No, I mean, she kind of just was riding the high of being in Twin Peaks, I think.

273
00:13:29,180 --> 00:13:32,280
Yeah, I feel like that's kind of just what she brought to the table.

274
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:36,060
Well, I guess with this one, too, it's just because it felt like I said,

275
00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:40,600
it felt like a 90s USA afternoon action show.

276
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:44,260
I just none of the acting like stood out to me in any way

277
00:13:44,260 --> 00:13:48,640
other than it was just there to progress the dumbass series of events.

278
00:13:49,340 --> 00:13:51,400
I don't think any one character.

279
00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:55,740
Well, I mean, Lyle Dennis Hopper, I think, did a really good job.

280
00:13:55,780 --> 00:13:57,240
He chewed that scenery so good.

281
00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:02,720
Yeah, he was also our most larger than life character in the whole thing.

282
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:05,060
So Nick Cage doesn't talk a lot in this film.

283
00:14:05,180 --> 00:14:06,480
No, he doesn't.

284
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:09,860
He's a pretty, you know, reserved, easygoing guy.

285
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:12,800
Yeah. Who, you know, just wanted some money.

286
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:16,800
So the big twist in the film is after they decide to go to

287
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,940
after they get away and they stay at the comfort in,

288
00:14:18,940 --> 00:14:22,040
they decide they're going to run to Mexico, which is a great idea.

289
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:25,800
You've just met this strange woman who life is embroiled with,

290
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:29,540
you know, homicides and you're like, all right, this seems like a good idea.

291
00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:32,280
We're down to our last, I'm assuming, 20 bucks.

292
00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:34,020
Mexico seems fine.

293
00:14:34,020 --> 00:14:37,520
And but she wants to go back and steal half a million, half a million

294
00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:41,120
from Wayne because it turns out they were bank robbers.

295
00:14:42,460 --> 00:14:44,600
I thought you were going to say lizard people.

296
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:46,820
That would have been that would have been our 9-11 episode.

297
00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:48,700
That would have been our 9-11 episode.

298
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:53,500
Didn't Laura Flynn Boyle play the alien baddie in Men in Black 2?

299
00:14:53,500 --> 00:14:56,260
I completely purged that film from my mind.

300
00:14:56,540 --> 00:14:59,100
I know Johnny Knoxville was her like wacky sidekick.

301
00:14:59,460 --> 00:15:02,500
I just have a weird encyclopedic knowledge of what Johnny Knoxville's in.

302
00:15:02,740 --> 00:15:03,840
That's fair.

303
00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,040
Oh, there you go.

304
00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:07,240
Hey, that tracks.

305
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:08,140
What else is she doing?

306
00:15:08,140 --> 00:15:08,980
No, it doesn't matter.

307
00:15:08,980 --> 00:15:11,020
This isn't a Laura Flynn Boyle podcast.

308
00:15:11,980 --> 00:15:13,320
It can be.

309
00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:15,120
I'll Google her later.

310
00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:17,060
So but yeah, the

311
00:15:17,060 --> 00:15:18,520
naughtiness ensues.

312
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:20,720
The cop the cop show up

313
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:24,760
to arrest Wayne because they find the wanted poster.

314
00:15:25,060 --> 00:15:26,600
Mm hmm. Yeah.

315
00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:27,800
They say what that came from.

316
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:28,860
It was in Kurt's pocket.

317
00:15:28,860 --> 00:15:31,300
Kurt being Laura's love buddy.

318
00:15:31,340 --> 00:15:35,340
OK, who was the guy that Nick Cage hit with his car?

319
00:15:35,380 --> 00:15:36,240
Yeah. All right.

320
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,840
That guy had a bad go, man.

321
00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:40,680
He got shot twice and then hit by a car in the rain.

322
00:15:40,780 --> 00:15:42,740
Yeah. But he was bleeding out, I guess.

323
00:15:42,740 --> 00:15:45,280
So I'm going to blame the victim here.

324
00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:50,580
What do you guys think of the the accent work between Lyle and Nick Cage's Michael?

325
00:15:50,780 --> 00:15:55,000
Well, luckily, Nick Cage didn't speak a lot because it wasn't the strongest accent.

326
00:15:55,220 --> 00:15:58,760
I thought Dennis Hopper just he had an accent and he committed.

327
00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:03,260
I don't know if there's different regional dialects in Texas.

328
00:16:03,260 --> 00:16:04,660
It's a pretty big fucking state.

329
00:16:04,660 --> 00:16:10,740
I imagine once you get around other border states, it would affect it.

330
00:16:10,900 --> 00:16:13,780
I had a really hard time watching Dennis Hopper in this

331
00:16:13,780 --> 00:16:17,180
because I had just been watching clips from Super Mario Brothers.

332
00:16:19,820 --> 00:16:21,520
I couldn't get that out of my head.

333
00:16:21,520 --> 00:16:23,720
I love that movie.

334
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:26,820
I did. I want to say I did genuinely enjoy this movie.

335
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:29,900
I like the Mexican standoff in the cemetery later.

336
00:16:30,300 --> 00:16:33,460
Yeah. Where they're like digging up the money from the bank robbery

337
00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,760
and everyone's got a gun on each other.

338
00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:39,800
I like how we keep actually misusing the term Mexican stand up.

339
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,440
Like, no, like they didn't all have guns.

340
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:43,680
There were enough guns.

341
00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:45,080
Yeah, there were there were guns.

342
00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:46,780
There was a knife. There was a shovel.

343
00:16:46,780 --> 00:16:48,140
Yeah, there was a pocket knife.

344
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:48,940
I think that counts.

345
00:16:48,940 --> 00:16:51,280
OK, I forgot to count the shuffle.

346
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:52,280
Very important.

347
00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:53,220
Your Mexican stand.

348
00:16:53,220 --> 00:16:55,280
Lyle trucks a knife into Wayne's throat.

349
00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:56,420
Dude, that was slick.

350
00:16:56,420 --> 00:16:57,420
That was super awesome.

351
00:16:57,420 --> 00:17:02,620
And also when he slipped the magazine out of the pistol before he threw it down,

352
00:17:02,860 --> 00:17:07,320
like ejected the magazine while it was pointed up so he could drop the pistol

353
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:09,600
and just keep that in his hand and he slid that up.

354
00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:13,340
That's why when Laura Flynn Boyle had it later, it was empty.

355
00:17:13,340 --> 00:17:14,280
Yeah, that was cool.

356
00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:17,540
Yeah. And then Lyle, he's a smooth operator.

357
00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:22,580
You know, when Lyle and him are tussling at the end, Lyle's dragging him over

358
00:17:22,580 --> 00:17:27,220
because there's a statue of a soldier with a bayonet.

359
00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:29,520
And Lyle's just like, I know what I'm going to do.

360
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:31,420
I'm going to stab this fucker on that.

361
00:17:31,420 --> 00:17:33,860
Nick Cage just grabs him and chucks him on it instead.

362
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:38,100
I did like that he kind of ghost rider Nick Cage with that chain, though.

363
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,800
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

364
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,760
It was a good purge.

365
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,940
I did enjoy it. I'm going to watch this movie again.

366
00:17:43,940 --> 00:17:45,340
It might work its way to my rotation.

367
00:17:45,340 --> 00:17:46,880
I like a romp.

368
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:49,040
I like a comedy of errors.

369
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:50,640
I like heists that have gone wrong.

370
00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:54,580
This movie has everything in it that I like in a bad movie.

371
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,880
And the bonus is it's not even a bad movie.

372
00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:58,380
It's not even a bad movie.

373
00:17:58,380 --> 00:18:01,320
But did you notice that there was Rainier beer in the house that he burned down?

374
00:18:01,460 --> 00:18:02,880
I did not. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

375
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:06,160
A case. Oh, awesome.

376
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,120
I I do want to point out that Scotch is not

377
00:18:09,120 --> 00:18:12,560
an appropriate accelerant if you're trying to burn a house down.

378
00:18:13,220 --> 00:18:15,460
It does not have a high enough ABV.

379
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:18,700
It's not going to burn hot enough or right

380
00:18:19,260 --> 00:18:22,100
for you to even set a blanket on fire.

381
00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:24,160
This is an arson podcast.

382
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:27,300
I just want anybody out there who thinks that it's.

383
00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:31,100
Let's don't say that we're we're on a list for the 9 11 episode.

384
00:18:31,100 --> 00:18:34,040
Don't start saying this is an arson podcast.

385
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:37,140
I'm just concerned with authenticity.

386
00:18:37,140 --> 00:18:38,380
We don't condone arson.

387
00:18:38,380 --> 00:18:41,020
But if you're going to do arson, don't do it with Scotch.

388
00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:42,880
Yeah, there's much cooler things.

389
00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:46,760
Just hit me up in the comments and we'll DM each other.

390
00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:53,900
Now, OK, wait, why the fuck would there have been Rainier's in Texas?

391
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:54,900
Oh, sorry, Wyoming.

392
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:56,540
Some of this was filmed in Montana.

393
00:18:56,540 --> 00:19:02,040
My time in Montana, I don't remember ever getting like even seen Rainier.

394
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:06,240
We mostly drank shit like cocaine, Molson, Labatt's.

395
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,040
Wasn't the burned down house type movie?

396
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:11,340
I mean, that was an abandoned house, wasn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

397
00:19:11,980 --> 00:19:14,880
So it could have been transients, but how did they get it?

398
00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:17,160
I don't know. We're really deep diving on this.

399
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:19,460
The director of photography was from Seattle, though.

400
00:19:19,460 --> 00:19:21,760
Well, there you go. We figured out the mystery. Maybe.

401
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,300
But the director was from Billings, Montana.

402
00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:27,660
So he should have known better for authenticity.

403
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:30,100
Oh, wait, one more thing before we jump to the quotes.

404
00:19:30,140 --> 00:19:33,640
All right. What the fuck was up with racing the train and jumping it?

405
00:19:33,660 --> 00:19:35,800
Oh, dude, that was fucking awesome.

406
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:42,180
So when Lyle gets Wayne out of prison, he's got Michael driving the car.

407
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:46,580
Wayne and Susanna are in the backseat and Lyle's up front with.

408
00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:50,580
But like so he breaks Wayne out of prison by killing like the deputy

409
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,580
getting Wayne has Michael drive at gunpoint

410
00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:57,100
and they're like driving to the tracks.

411
00:19:57,260 --> 00:20:01,220
Train gets in the way and Michael's just like starting to slow down

412
00:20:01,220 --> 00:20:05,040
and Lyle just like puts his foot on Michael's foot and just like revs down

413
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,780
directly at a train.

414
00:20:06,780 --> 00:20:10,280
Yeah, well, he was trying to get away because the cops saw them.

415
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:13,940
Yeah, but like just does that with doesn't tell him to turn, just does it.

416
00:20:13,940 --> 00:20:17,220
And Michael has to like scoot down and like race the train

417
00:20:17,220 --> 00:20:19,920
and try and like hop in front of it. It was crazy.

418
00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:23,100
My note for that was them Duke boys is at it again.

419
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,900
Did you hear like after the cop came back out

420
00:20:25,900 --> 00:20:29,100
and he noticed the conversation of like the truck driver and stuff over there?

421
00:20:29,100 --> 00:20:33,840
Did you hear the one resident was just like, oh, man, what an asshole.

422
00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:37,280
Oh, this movie just goes out of clip like scene to scene.

423
00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:39,620
And something happens in every scene to the point where, yeah,

424
00:20:40,020 --> 00:20:42,960
rad train chase I completely forgot about.

425
00:20:43,260 --> 00:20:46,260
Did you notice after that whole scene

426
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:50,200
when they brought in that chick to run the dispatch for the cops

427
00:20:50,900 --> 00:20:53,960
in the background behind, you could still see the dead cop

428
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:56,200
laying on the ground with just like a sheet over him. Yeah.

429
00:20:56,940 --> 00:20:59,980
I did like when they're all in the car,

430
00:20:59,980 --> 00:21:03,720
Lyle's talking to Wayne about how like the biggest con

431
00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:06,120
Wayne ever did was how do you become sheriff?

432
00:21:07,260 --> 00:21:09,360
It's just like I got the votes.

433
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:13,800
But then Suzanne's like, and you buy everybody in town a beer. Yeah.

434
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,540
That's how you become sheriff corruption.

435
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:20,000
So, you know, authenticity. At least they got that one right.

436
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:25,080
And so the final scene is they jump on the hop train with the money,

437
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:26,180
with the bag of money.

438
00:21:26,180 --> 00:21:30,680
And she, you know, she has the gun still that no longer has the magazine.

439
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:34,760
She's going to take the money and he's, you know, advances upon her.

440
00:21:35,060 --> 00:21:37,020
She pulls the trigger. Nothing happens.

441
00:21:37,020 --> 00:21:40,260
He like takes the money, limps over to the boxcar, open door

442
00:21:40,460 --> 00:21:44,220
and just starts throwing all the money out and then trucks her off the train.

443
00:21:44,420 --> 00:21:48,460
Well, yeah, I thought it was strange that the money in the bag

444
00:21:48,460 --> 00:21:50,440
was just loose bills.

445
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:52,640
Well, every other time money has been presented here,

446
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:54,840
it's been like banded from a bank.

447
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:59,540
There was even one banded piece of money that came out of the bag

448
00:21:59,540 --> 00:22:02,180
and stayed on the train that Nick Cage found.

449
00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:06,780
All the money was loose, except for the one that landed in the train.

450
00:22:06,780 --> 00:22:08,920
Everything else blew away. Yeah.

451
00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:10,060
And then absurd.

452
00:22:10,060 --> 00:22:13,260
After he throws her off the train, he slumps down off to his next adventure

453
00:22:13,260 --> 00:22:16,620
and out of his coat, he pulls one stack of cash.

454
00:22:16,820 --> 00:22:19,100
It wasn't out of his coat. It was trapped in the door.

455
00:22:19,100 --> 00:22:20,840
It was trapped in the doorway. That's right. Yeah.

456
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:25,440
Yeah. And then he just says, Adios, Red Rocks.

457
00:22:26,180 --> 00:22:27,800
Adios, Weddwock.

458
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:30,440
Weddwock. Adios, Weddwock.

459
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:32,920
Do you have a now he's waddo?

460
00:22:35,380 --> 00:22:36,740
Do you have a quote, Nick?

461
00:22:36,740 --> 00:22:41,860
Hold on. Did anybody else legitimately think that they saw Nick Cage's penis?

462
00:22:42,380 --> 00:22:44,960
I had to back it up like five times and I was like,

463
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:48,300
are we just seeing his fucking meaty dork right there?

464
00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:51,500
And I'm pretty sure it was like the other side of his side.

465
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:57,400
This was in the scene at the comfort in when he and Suzanne are getting it on.

466
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,800
Yeah. And she like, you know, slides down the stomach doing the

467
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:04,080
I'm going to give you the time of your life thing.

468
00:23:04,700 --> 00:23:06,640
She's kind of give it a head.

469
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:10,080
And it just really, really

470
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:13,120
suggestively looks like his wiener. OK.

471
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,180
Well, we've seen while we're on the subject of his wiener,

472
00:23:16,180 --> 00:23:18,920
you have some on the subject of Nick Cage's body

473
00:23:19,260 --> 00:23:21,220
because we've seen his body a lot.

474
00:23:21,220 --> 00:23:22,960
That's Sternenbush.

475
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:25,100
He is a hairy man in this film. Oh, yeah.

476
00:23:25,300 --> 00:23:28,300
Whereas I think the most other recent time we've seen his

477
00:23:29,060 --> 00:23:31,500
chastular region was Ghost Rider.

478
00:23:31,500 --> 00:23:33,880
We is smooth like a baby.

479
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:37,400
Yeah. Most times it seems like he's a well,

480
00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:42,720
most times when he's in a role where he's in fairly decent shape,

481
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,220
it looks like he does a lot of manscaping.

482
00:23:45,220 --> 00:23:48,620
There's a lot of times where it's like, oh, you're just like hairy.

483
00:23:49,020 --> 00:23:50,860
Or it could be a chest marking.

484
00:23:50,860 --> 00:23:51,860
Could be a chest marking.

485
00:23:51,860 --> 00:23:54,260
I just want to say chest marking quotes.

486
00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:56,560
Mine was Fuck Mexico.

487
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:57,900
That is a pretty good one.

488
00:23:57,900 --> 00:24:02,300
Now, we kind of covered both of mine, but I think I really liked the one

489
00:24:02,300 --> 00:24:06,040
where they start up the Jeep, looks at the gas tank on empty

490
00:24:06,100 --> 00:24:08,200
and just story my fucking life.

491
00:24:09,580 --> 00:24:12,620
So I'm glad we just casually discussed all of our quotes

492
00:24:12,620 --> 00:24:16,080
and really kind of shit the bed here and the big reveal for that.

493
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:18,520
Yeah, I'm just going to really chop them up.

494
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:21,220
That's good. My quote is when

495
00:24:22,360 --> 00:24:25,020
and you don't. Mexico.

496
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:30,260
So our second film today was Army of One.

497
00:24:30,260 --> 00:24:32,060
I mean, Dying of the Light.

498
00:24:32,060 --> 00:24:34,440
It pretty much is just Army of One.

499
00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:38,040
Nicolas Cage plays an insane person trying to track down a terrorist.

500
00:24:38,580 --> 00:24:41,200
Just this time written and directed by Paul Schrader.

501
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:47,080
So just listen to our Army of One episode and then our doggy dog episode.

502
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:49,140
You'll pretty much have all our thoughts on this one.

503
00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:50,880
Thanks for listening.

504
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:52,520
Yeah, good episode, guys.

505
00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:56,720
No, this one is terrible.

506
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:58,920
Not to give up the ghost too early on which is going to win,

507
00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:02,020
but we were not looking forward to this and it did not disappoint

508
00:25:02,020 --> 00:25:03,720
with being disappointed.

509
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:05,960
Before we get into this, I do.

510
00:25:06,660 --> 00:25:09,460
This might be an unfair pairing

511
00:25:09,460 --> 00:25:12,660
because the whole reason dog eat dog happened

512
00:25:12,660 --> 00:25:16,060
was because Paul Schrader wanted a redo with Nick Cage

513
00:25:16,060 --> 00:25:20,300
because this movie Dying of the Light was taken out of his hands

514
00:25:20,300 --> 00:25:21,640
in the editing process.

515
00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:25,980
So he and Nicolas Cage feel like the movie that we were given

516
00:25:25,980 --> 00:25:30,940
by the studio does not actually fairly represent their work.

517
00:25:30,940 --> 00:25:34,780
I can't remember because I purged everything about dog eat dog out of my brain.

518
00:25:34,780 --> 00:25:37,020
Did he get final cut on that on dog eat dog?

519
00:25:37,020 --> 00:25:38,020
Yeah. Yes.

520
00:25:38,020 --> 00:25:40,820
Then they're both they're both terrible.

521
00:25:41,360 --> 00:25:46,360
Yeah. Did you guys do any diving into trying to find his recut?

522
00:25:47,420 --> 00:25:49,760
There is not and will never be a recut.

523
00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:51,460
There is a recut.

524
00:25:51,460 --> 00:25:56,600
He took the theatrical version and reedited it to be closer to his initial idea.

525
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:57,600
But no new film.

526
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:01,940
Just he took what was released and like, yeah, it's called dark.

527
00:26:01,980 --> 00:26:03,480
Yeah, the audio is kind of fucked up.

528
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:07,340
And yeah, it's I found it and I started watching some of it,

529
00:26:07,340 --> 00:26:08,680
but I didn't watch this actual movie.

530
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,520
So I was like, this doesn't mean shit to me.

531
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,980
I don't care enough to to see what that would look like.

532
00:26:14,260 --> 00:26:18,620
I don't consider that truly his cut of the movie.

533
00:26:18,620 --> 00:26:22,020
Well, it's no, I'm not asking for a Zack Snyder situation

534
00:26:22,020 --> 00:26:23,500
because that was bullshit, too.

535
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:26,660
I don't think anyone is really deeply asking for a Paul Schrader cut.

536
00:26:26,660 --> 00:26:27,660
Give us the Schrader cut.

537
00:26:27,660 --> 00:26:32,600
I want to give us a schrader to give me four hours every time Nick Cage is on screen.

538
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:36,180
It has to start with like slow motion and Amazon music.

539
00:26:36,180 --> 00:26:40,980
And so this film stars Nicolas Cage as CIA agent Evan Lake,

540
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:45,780
Anton Yelchin, which sad as Milt Schultz

541
00:26:46,060 --> 00:26:49,220
and Alexander Kareem as Mohammed Baner.

542
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:53,460
So Nick Cage plays an older CIA agent

543
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:57,000
CIA agent who has been on desk duty

544
00:26:57,400 --> 00:27:01,700
for about 22 years after being tortured by Baner

545
00:27:01,940 --> 00:27:04,300
in a pretty gruesome little torture sequence.

546
00:27:04,300 --> 00:27:07,940
Nick Cage has got a fucked up ear the whole time because he gets tremors to it.

547
00:27:08,140 --> 00:27:10,540
And all I could think was, you know, you think he fucked up his own ear

548
00:27:10,540 --> 00:27:13,380
to be more accurate to the character like he did with the birdie?

549
00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:16,040
No, because the prosthetic looked awful.

550
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:18,080
Yeah, it looked so bad.

551
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:21,520
I mean, you could tell it was just something built off of his ear.

552
00:27:21,520 --> 00:27:25,380
Yeah. So now he had one really like kind of wing shaped ear.

553
00:27:25,380 --> 00:27:26,420
Bizarre.

554
00:27:26,420 --> 00:27:28,920
Later on, we used to go into go undercover.

555
00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:33,360
They spirit glue some hair onto his face and give him like a fake ear covering,

556
00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:36,000
which is just him without the bad prosthetic on it.

557
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:38,300
But when he does take that off for the big reveal at the end,

558
00:27:38,300 --> 00:27:42,600
it's just the big bad prosthetic with an even worse prosthetic glued over.

559
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:46,200
You don't see him take like the disguise off.

560
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:51,180
It's just like he reaches up to take it off, cut to Baner

561
00:27:51,180 --> 00:27:53,380
and then cut back to Nicholas Cage.

562
00:27:53,380 --> 00:27:56,420
And he's just got it pulling away from his face.

563
00:27:56,420 --> 00:27:58,680
It was like, hey, you've got something in your ear.

564
00:27:59,020 --> 00:28:01,180
Oh, how did this quarter get here?

565
00:28:01,180 --> 00:28:02,760
How did my disguise?

566
00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:05,420
Oh, how did the CIA credentials show up?

567
00:28:05,420 --> 00:28:10,000
So he has been obsessed with Baner for 22 years since he'd been tortured.

568
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:11,960
I guess rightfully so.

569
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:15,000
Someone like took a cricket bat to my head and cut my ear off.

570
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:18,100
I'd be mad. And he wants back in the field.

571
00:28:18,100 --> 00:28:19,600
They're trying to push him out.

572
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,680
They're trying to get him to retire because he has dementia.

573
00:28:23,180 --> 00:28:27,340
Like he like he goes to a doctor far away and like tries to hide it from,

574
00:28:27,340 --> 00:28:28,840
you know, CIA.

575
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:33,020
He finds out that he has FTD frontal temporal dementia.

576
00:28:33,020 --> 00:28:36,760
And the next time he goes in, he goes to the Pentagon.

577
00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:41,320
The director calls him into the office and like, you don't think we keep track

578
00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:43,460
of like medical records for our agents?

579
00:28:43,460 --> 00:28:45,400
What's the conceit of this entire thing?

580
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:48,160
Is it to make him an unreliable narrator?

581
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:50,200
Like, oh, well, fuck.

582
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:51,200
What's the point?

583
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:52,200
There is none.

584
00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:57,500
It's just he wants revenge and he is losing his mind and he wants to like,

585
00:28:57,500 --> 00:29:00,100
finish this last case before he's completely gone.

586
00:29:00,100 --> 00:29:03,940
But this is the biggest waste of the film for a Nick Cage film.

587
00:29:03,940 --> 00:29:06,220
You mean like, why give him this disease?

588
00:29:06,220 --> 00:29:08,120
It's just to complicate things.

589
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:11,960
I'll try to give this like a quick two minute linear.

590
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:13,520
Yeah, because I didn't watch.

591
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:17,020
Yes. So the people at home almost certainly didn't.

592
00:29:17,020 --> 00:29:21,760
And I don't know why I own this movie on Blu Ray and it's beautiful.

593
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:24,960
So Evan, I almost call him Evan Stone.

594
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:27,840
It's Evan Lake, the very different actors.

595
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:30,000
It would have gotten the exact same performance.

596
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:31,600
Both storied careers.

597
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:35,080
Evan is tortured by this terrorist.

598
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:40,120
Some American agents bust through a wall, Kool-Aid man style.

599
00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:42,720
They save him in the rescue.

600
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:46,320
They determine that Benir is dead because there's this body.

601
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:50,160
It doesn't have a head, though, so they can't like definitively say,

602
00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:52,160
but they're all like, Benir's dead.

603
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:53,360
And like, here's the body.

604
00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:56,800
And Evan, but I keep wanting to call him Evan Stone.

605
00:29:56,800 --> 00:30:01,500
Evan, he's a porn star, people, and an awesome one.

606
00:30:01,500 --> 00:30:04,140
Evan is convinced that he never died.

607
00:30:04,140 --> 00:30:05,800
He gets put on desk duty.

608
00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:09,880
He does like speeches for recruits and things like that.

609
00:30:09,880 --> 00:30:15,680
Basically, he gets way demoted because of this.

610
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,480
And he's always trying to like find leads or whatever

611
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:20,480
into whatever could have happened to Benir.

612
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:24,760
But can't. He's just like he's hit a stone wall until one day,

613
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:29,520
this Kenyan courier gets busted in Bucharest,

614
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:32,400
picking up some shit from a doctor.

615
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:34,560
He had a USB drive.

616
00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:38,200
And when he's caught, there's a chase.

617
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:43,040
He ends up throwing his USB drive into the river and jumping in.

618
00:30:43,040 --> 00:30:44,840
The cops go and they like drag it.

619
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:45,640
They find it.

620
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:48,440
And they find all these like they say they find.

621
00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:55,720
Porn, Islamic scriptures, angry birds and medical records on this USB drive.

622
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:57,720
And so they're like, well, it's kind of damaged.

623
00:30:57,720 --> 00:30:58,720
We can't really read it.

624
00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:00,720
So they send it off to Langley.

625
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:06,160
And that's how it gets back to Evan that there's these medical records.

626
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:12,200
And he's like, oh, like Benir's dad had this disease and like these drugs are used for

627
00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:13,400
treating that disease.

628
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:16,400
So finally, you know, like something's going to happen.

629
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:21,400
So finally, you know, like something's come out, like we can chase this down.

630
00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:24,760
Experimental drugs for a type of rare type of anemia.

631
00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:25,560
Yeah. Yeah.

632
00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:29,880
So you see that Benir's got this like blood disease.

633
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:34,720
He's got bad bloods, just like Nicolas Cage has a bad brain in this one.

634
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:36,640
I think that even comes up in their fight.

635
00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:38,320
Is there a dialysis fight?

636
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:39,120
No.

637
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:39,640
Fuck.

638
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:40,120
Kind of.

639
00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:41,360
Well, no dialysis.

640
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:43,360
But he's hooked up to a dialysis machine.

641
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:44,160
Benir is.

642
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:46,000
OK.

643
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:47,360
Either way.

644
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,960
So it's the exact same movie.

645
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:55,840
When Evan brings this up, like all this information up to the CIA director,

646
00:31:55,840 --> 00:32:00,960
the director basically starts to like say, no, that's not true.

647
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:02,200
We put a pin in it.

648
00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:03,400
This is done.

649
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:05,440
You're going to have to like just give it up.

650
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:10,240
Then we get scenes with Nicolas Cage finding out he's got this frontotemporal

651
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:13,960
dementia, which is going to kill him a lot faster than Alzheimer's.

652
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:18,160
And so he really just kind of wants to take out Benir at this point.

653
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:19,760
He's like, I've got a lot of time.

654
00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:24,760
And then the CIA has found out that he has this brain disease.

655
00:32:24,760 --> 00:32:28,480
So they're like, hey, man, you can't do your job anymore.

656
00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:29,480
You got brain disease.

657
00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:32,520
You got the brains and you got the brain.

658
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:33,240
You got the brain.

659
00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:35,280
Well, you don't have the brains. Hence why you have to go.

660
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:39,080
Yeah. So he's like, there was a fit.

661
00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:40,960
They escort him out.

662
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:45,640
His protege, Milt, the one who brought him the information in the first place,

663
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:49,680
played by Anton Yelchin, comes to his house with his stuff later.

664
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:52,400
And Nicolas Cage offers him some sake,

665
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:54,920
because apparently that's what his character drinks,

666
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,160
because he goes through two bottles of it in this scene.

667
00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:02,440
They go over the case and Nick Cage kind of just lays out that,

668
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:04,040
you know, he's going to he's going to do it.

669
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:07,120
He's just going to go find Benir and like take care of this himself.

670
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:12,760
Anton Yelchin and Nick Cage go on a wild adventure to Bucharest,

671
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:18,480
find this doctor, confront him and kind of pressure him into like turning.

672
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:22,320
So like he'll set up another meeting with Benir's people.

673
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:27,960
Benir's right hand man went to Bucharest because the Kenyan never came back.

674
00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:30,040
Yeah. And obviously he needs the medicine.

675
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:31,120
So he's sending more people.

676
00:33:31,120 --> 00:33:34,560
Also was to bring the doctor back to him.

677
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:40,560
Yeah. So now they're going to do a swap once they've, you know, killed Benir's guy

678
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:44,280
so that there's no nobody who can say, hey, that's not the doctor.

679
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,080
They dress Nick Cage up as the doctor.

680
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:49,600
He goes to Mombasa, the asshole of Africa.

681
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:50,720
Not my words.

682
00:33:50,720 --> 00:33:53,440
I just have to make that clear because I say a lot of terrible things,

683
00:33:53,440 --> 00:33:55,280
but I'm not going to put down Mombasa.

684
00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:57,800
I have a lot of respect for Mombasa.

685
00:33:57,800 --> 00:33:59,120
So he goes out there.

686
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:04,800
They have a scene where Nick Cage, you know, as a doctor shows up

687
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:09,560
and he is talking to Benir and goes to the bathroom.

688
00:34:09,560 --> 00:34:11,080
He's like, oh, the toilet won't flush.

689
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:14,040
So Benir's bodyguard goes in there and Nick Cage,

690
00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:19,360
karate chops him and like knocks him out and locks him in the bathroom.

691
00:34:19,360 --> 00:34:24,720
Then he goes back out and he's talking to Benir and he's like, oh man,

692
00:34:24,720 --> 00:34:27,760
your situation's a lot worse than I had expected.

693
00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:32,080
Blah, blah, blah. Not only is it deteriorating, I'm not a doctor.

694
00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:36,760
And he like takes off the mustache and takes off the little goatee

695
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:38,960
and the fake ear.

696
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:41,480
Yeah. And that's when he's like doing the fake ear thing,

697
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:45,280
the real ear to fake ear to prosthetic prosthetic ear.

698
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:47,640
Yeah, it's earception. And

699
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:51,480
I was in Evan Stone movie.

700
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:53,960
OK, there's my one joke for the episode.

701
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:55,480
I'm going to go back to bed.

702
00:34:55,480 --> 00:35:00,000
And then they kind of like get all up about each other.

703
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,320
But he's been Nick Cage has been drugged.

704
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:06,080
And so they just kind of argue for a little while.

705
00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:08,400
And there's a lot of PTSD moments.

706
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:09,320
He hasn't been drugged.

707
00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:14,080
This is like really the one time we see the unreliable sensory perceptions

708
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:18,840
because he starts flashing back to the torture while Benir is kind of lecturing

709
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:23,320
to him. And so Nick Cage is in and out of the moment.

710
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:26,560
And they kind of both realize that they're both dying.

711
00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:29,200
And just Nick Cage just kind of walks out of there.

712
00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:31,160
They even like say goodbye to each other.

713
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:35,160
It all kind of like stopped when it was like the call to prayer goes off.

714
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:39,960
And when he was like, oh, would you help me to like set up my prayer rug?

715
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:42,720
And Cage is like, no, I won't do that.

716
00:35:42,960 --> 00:35:44,320
And then he just like walks out.

717
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,040
Yeah, that was a good Gary voice.

718
00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:49,120
Yeah, it's like the same movie is the same movie.

719
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:53,800
One man goes to another country to bring a terrorist back for justice.

720
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:55,040
How much is left in this?

721
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:56,640
Oh, like 10 minutes.

722
00:35:56,640 --> 00:35:58,320
Yeah. Of me describing.

723
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:02,920
Yes. This next scene, though, is probably my favorite scene.

724
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:05,600
Oh, yeah. The credits.

725
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:09,680
The pool party. Nick Cage goes back to the hotel, meets up with the

726
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:13,080
Milt and just tells him like, yeah, I just left him there.

727
00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:15,000
Oh, I thought he told him like he killed him.

728
00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:17,520
Like when they when Milt's picking him up in the car.

729
00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:19,600
Oh, that's not like how was it? Oh, yeah.

730
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,840
Was it everything you wanted?

731
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,120
And he's like, oh, man, you should have heard him scream.

732
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:24,120
That's right. And it's no.

733
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:26,520
But then he's just talking about like all the normal stuff he's going to do

734
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:30,240
when he gets back home and they're just at this nice hotel pool.

735
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:32,520
And then everybody gets shot.

736
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:36,680
Yeah. I mean, not everybody, but like Milt gets shot and he's down.

737
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:38,960
And then there's just like bullets flying.

738
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:43,640
A lot of other people and so much bad CG bullet holes in people

739
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,440
and like that aren't rendered correctly.

740
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:48,520
And it just looks horrible.

741
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:52,080
Yeah. And it wasn't jujitsu bad, but that's what I was trying to think.

742
00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:53,520
I'm like, where have we seen this before?

743
00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:54,880
Yeah, it wasn't quite that bad.

744
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:56,720
And then he does. Then he goes back.

745
00:36:56,720 --> 00:36:57,720
Yeah, there's a chase.

746
00:36:57,720 --> 00:37:03,360
He like fights a couple like Kenyan bodyguards or well, like terrorist bodyguards

747
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:07,880
and steals a van from one of them and then goes back to.

748
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:09,720
And that's when they have their tussle.

749
00:37:09,720 --> 00:37:14,200
And then there's old man fight, which has all the energy of two dying old men

750
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:18,880
rolling on the ground until Nicholas Cage stabs Binyar

751
00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:23,600
in the fucking eye with his finger, like holding him down and just slowly.

752
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:27,600
Like, well, Binyar is resisting, pushes his finger through his eye

753
00:37:27,600 --> 00:37:30,240
and then you're just dies immediately from that.

754
00:37:30,240 --> 00:37:32,240
I want to die immediately.

755
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:39,600
And then while driving back, Evans just like had enough of it.

756
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:43,200
So he like swerves and just like pitches the van.

757
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:46,040
The van in front of a semi and kills himself.

758
00:37:47,120 --> 00:37:48,280
Fuck that.

759
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,480
Harrison Ford was originally approached to do this,

760
00:37:51,720 --> 00:37:56,800
but he didn't want to because of what he cited.

761
00:37:56,800 --> 00:38:00,720
I'm sure there was more than just this, but his reason for not doing it

762
00:38:00,720 --> 00:38:04,640
was the bleak ending of the movie.

763
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:09,680
Did you see who was supposed to be the the young trainee with Harrison Ford?

764
00:38:09,720 --> 00:38:11,440
No. Channing Tatum.

765
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:13,720
Oh, that would have been a much better film.

766
00:38:13,720 --> 00:38:15,920
And it shouldn't have been directed by Schrader.

767
00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:22,120
I've tried to name my tools at work after like Channing Tatum relating things

768
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:23,840
like my channel locks.

769
00:38:23,840 --> 00:38:27,960
I just call my Channing Tatums and my my wire strippers.

770
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:29,600
I call my magic Mike. There we go.

771
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,880
That's good. But do you have a Jupiter ascending?

772
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:35,160
I do right now.

773
00:38:35,960 --> 00:38:38,960
This movie, as a Nick Cage film, is so wasted

774
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:43,120
because of the whole story element of him having frontal temporal dementia.

775
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:45,760
Because let me give you this is early in the film.

776
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:50,200
And when these symptoms are listed, I get I get so excited.

777
00:38:50,360 --> 00:38:53,280
The doctor's like, you'll be subject to overreaction.

778
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:55,760
Perfect for Nick Cage mood swings.

779
00:38:55,760 --> 00:38:58,600
Hell, yeah. Unreliable sensory perception.

780
00:38:58,640 --> 00:38:59,880
That could be fun.

781
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:04,720
And he kind of just gets uppity and yells at people and tells them to fuck off a lot.

782
00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:06,080
Yeah, he's just kind of fussy.

783
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:08,000
He's yeah, he's just like a fussy old man.

784
00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:10,240
He like twice he mixes up his words.

785
00:39:10,240 --> 00:39:14,280
Yeah, like he diamond diamond ruby diamond Tuesdays.

786
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:17,160
And that's why I know it was like Ruby Tuesdays.

787
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:18,800
He likes it.

788
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:24,080
Tells the director, the CIA director to fuck off when security comes to like

789
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:25,280
you have to leave the premises.

790
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:29,360
He starts like hocking his medals and trophies at them.

791
00:39:29,680 --> 00:39:32,760
And like he gets hauled out of hauled out of there.

792
00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:36,280
I just jumped around to random points on the timeline

793
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:38,560
and watched like 30 second clips.

794
00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:41,680
One of them that stood out to me is he's talking to Anton Yelchin.

795
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:44,280
He sticks his hand out and then he puts a book on it.

796
00:39:44,280 --> 00:39:45,880
Oh, that was like, what's that about?

797
00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:47,960
Oh, so he's got like a shaky hand.

798
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:48,920
He's getting tremors.

799
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:51,240
Yeah. So he like sticks his hand out.

800
00:39:51,240 --> 00:39:53,640
He's like, put that dictionary on my hand.

801
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:57,760
And then like not even half a beat later, he's just like,

802
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:02,920
it's that orange book on the I have a quote here because this was my quote.

803
00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:05,120
It's like, put that dictionary on my hand.

804
00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:08,720
It's a book. It's yellow and it's a dictionary.

805
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:14,240
Yeah. And obviously, it melts like I know what a dictionary is, asshole.

806
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:17,880
Just the dialogue in this movie is so atrocious.

807
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:22,920
But like, OK, Nick Cage, actor famously known for going over

808
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:26,200
the top insane performances and has given a character

809
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:30,200
who is supposed to be subject to overreaction and just losing his shit.

810
00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:34,000
And all he does is just kind of silently see

811
00:40:34,000 --> 00:40:37,520
than when he's told to put out a cigarette in a restaurant.

812
00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:39,520
He just gets angry.

813
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,240
Yeah. You could have done so much more with that.

814
00:40:42,680 --> 00:40:43,800
Yeah, it was a real letdown.

815
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:47,400
But it's kind of like if somebody tells you to do something and you're just like, no,

816
00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:49,840
yeah, I don't want to. That's really it.

817
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:51,720
I don't want to overreact.

818
00:40:51,720 --> 00:40:56,040
I'm going to sit here and do nothing because I do that all the time.

819
00:40:57,600 --> 00:41:01,400
I know. That's how every one of these podcasts starts before we start rolling.

820
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:02,960
Very easy to manipulate.

821
00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:07,480
You just have to tell me not to do something and I will do it.

822
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:11,280
Anton Yelchin, I have a hard time looking at his face

823
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:14,760
because he looks kind of like a baby and an old man at the exact same time.

824
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,600
You mean like babies do? Yeah.

825
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,760
Nick, I'm glad you gave the the breakdown of this film

826
00:41:21,760 --> 00:41:24,760
because I was just looking at my notes for like the timeline of this film.

827
00:41:25,240 --> 00:41:28,640
And I'm like, all right, frontal temporal dementia, but you're also sick.

828
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:30,400
Hereditary anemia.

829
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:33,640
A bunch of shit happens. Milt kills a guy. Oh, man.

830
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:35,240
Yeah, you got it.

831
00:41:35,920 --> 00:41:40,760
How fucking bad is everybody at surveillance in this movie?

832
00:41:41,240 --> 00:41:45,520
Like the Bucharest police are like across the parking lot

833
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,880
when the Kenyan courier comes out

834
00:41:49,240 --> 00:41:53,520
and they're like talking about him and they're in a car and he goes to his car.

835
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:59,440
And like before he even gets into his car, the cops turn on their car

836
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,200
and like their headlights come up and then the Kenyan sees them.

837
00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:04,400
And it's like, oh, shit, he's made us.

838
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:06,400
You guys suck at surveillance.

839
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:08,680
So then they like try to follow him and it turns into a chase.

840
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:14,280
Then at the end, it's like Evan and Milt are in Bucharest

841
00:42:14,280 --> 00:42:17,680
and they're trying to find who the new Kenyan guy is going to be

842
00:42:18,280 --> 00:42:20,080
when he shows up at the hospital.

843
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:23,200
So they're like staking out out front and then they see him.

844
00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,840
And then like they watch him again later.

845
00:42:25,840 --> 00:42:30,280
But they're like all the way across this like festival grounds that's getting set up.

846
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,080
And they're sitting at a table and both of them are just turned

847
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:36,280
180 degrees or whatever.

848
00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:39,120
It's a look at this guy and they're staring him down.

849
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:44,120
So like he comes out of the building and looks out and is like two white dudes

850
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,440
just fucking mean mugging you.

851
00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:48,480
So he ran. Yeah.

852
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:51,120
Does the CIA agent count as a cop?

853
00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:53,840
I was going to ask that. Yeah.

854
00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:55,480
They're all still government.

855
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:58,480
I put this in the bad cop category.

856
00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:00,360
Anton Yelchin counts as a good kid, though.

857
00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:02,760
Yeah. Good kid. Bad cop. Good kid.

858
00:43:02,760 --> 00:43:05,440
Bad cop. Good kid. Bad cop.

859
00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:08,640
Yeah, I think a kid bad cop. Bad cop.

860
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:11,840
I want to go back to that that socky thing.

861
00:43:12,000 --> 00:43:16,840
Like they've got him drinking socky and then later he's in the hotel room.

862
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:20,280
He's just sitting full lotus on the bed.

863
00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:23,120
It's like, what the fuck is with this character?

864
00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:25,760
Like why they never talk about it?

865
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:28,640
There's no justification for things like I'm fine with

866
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:32,320
characters existing beyond the movie.

867
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:38,360
And I'm OK with like I don't need to have some like everything explained out,

868
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:41,040
like why they are the way they are.

869
00:43:41,040 --> 00:43:45,080
But these are just two isolated incidents

870
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:50,960
on either side of the movie that points him to like being a big Japan file

871
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:53,680
or whatever, a weeaboo weeaboo weeaboo.

872
00:43:53,720 --> 00:43:56,160
Yeah, weeaboo. Is that offensive?

873
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:58,680
Not to me, because I'm not a nerd.

874
00:43:59,200 --> 00:44:01,480
I fucking don't care.

875
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:03,440
I'm not even going to look this one up.

876
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:07,120
Yeah, just publish it, Peter.

877
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:10,160
We're doing a no edit episode.

878
00:44:11,240 --> 00:44:13,040
Yeah, I just don't understand.

879
00:44:13,040 --> 00:44:18,320
Like those are two things like every other time he drinks a lot in this movie.

880
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,280
And it's a whiskey, except for when he's at his house

881
00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:24,320
and he drinks two bottles of sake, well, him and milked.

882
00:44:24,720 --> 00:44:27,240
That second bottle, he was just mainlining now. Oh, yeah.

883
00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:32,880
Then at the end of the movie, he's just sitting in like the full lotus position.

884
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:35,440
Why is why are you doing this?

885
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:37,880
Paul Schrader, why do you do this to us?

886
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:39,920
Because he doesn't think.

887
00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:45,200
Yeah, I feel like at this point, I've seen enough Paul Schrader stuff to just

888
00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:47,920
know that I don't like him. Yeah.

889
00:44:47,920 --> 00:44:52,920
I'm kind of curious why Cage wanted to work with him

890
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:54,800
and then wanted to work with him again.

891
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,720
I mean, I get what happened with the, you know, director's cut.

892
00:44:57,720 --> 00:45:02,880
Yeah, Cage does like to do things to challenge himself, as we've learned.

893
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:05,440
Did you feel like he was challenged in this?

894
00:45:05,440 --> 00:45:07,320
I mean, he did it for a million dollars.

895
00:45:07,920 --> 00:45:09,840
That's a lot less money than normal.

896
00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:10,760
So that is a challenge.

897
00:45:10,760 --> 00:45:13,520
This movie had a five million dollar budget.

898
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:15,720
And one million.

899
00:45:15,720 --> 00:45:18,120
That was Nick Cage's take home.

900
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:20,280
And it didn't make fuck all for money.

901
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:24,320
No, it did not. It made under 700000 worldwide.

902
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:27,640
So what's your what's your quote from this film, Nick?

903
00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:32,960
Geez, there's so many things that like I enjoyed for different reasons.

904
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:35,280
Like there's some lines that are just bad.

905
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,480
There's bad deliveries there.

906
00:45:37,720 --> 00:45:42,160
My favorite bad delivery is Nicholas Cage is talking about

907
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:45,000
like how they're going to get veneer because he's got this

908
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:48,720
disease and stuff, and he's just like, but you just got it.

909
00:45:49,120 --> 00:45:50,280
It's come out.

910
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:51,880
It's in his blood.

911
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:54,000
And it's like, what the fuck?

912
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:58,120
And he gives it like this stupid like head slide with like sneer.

913
00:45:58,120 --> 00:45:59,560
It's in his blood.

914
00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:01,240
It's like, Jesus.

915
00:46:01,240 --> 00:46:04,800
His first big line in this film is when he comes out on stage.

916
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:07,000
It's so we see him getting tortured.

917
00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:08,840
We see him get hit with a cricket bat.

918
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:11,520
Twenty two. Then it immediately cuts to 22 years later.

919
00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:14,000
Evan looks exactly the same except he has gray hair.

920
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:16,600
Now and it fucked up here.

921
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:20,440
And he walks out on stage to talk to like new CIA cadets.

922
00:46:20,600 --> 00:46:23,920
And I'm not going to do the whole line, but like just the delivery

923
00:46:23,920 --> 00:46:28,400
and the and the writing here just told me this was going to be awful,

924
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:30,920
which is what the hell are you doing here?

925
00:46:31,240 --> 00:46:34,600
Haven't you heard the CIA fell from the Berlin wall

926
00:46:34,600 --> 00:46:37,480
and all the president's men can't put it back together again?

927
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:40,880
Yeah, it's awful. It's the dumbest little speech.

928
00:46:40,880 --> 00:46:43,880
It's broke. It's not reliable, not trustworthy.

929
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:45,680
And it just keeps going.

930
00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:49,200
And for some reason, like it's in like a freezing cold room

931
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:50,960
because you can see the steam on his breath.

932
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:53,480
But all the cadets are in T-shirts.

933
00:46:53,480 --> 00:46:56,640
I do like one of his better freakouts, though, to the CIA director.

934
00:46:56,960 --> 00:47:01,200
You've got your head so far up Obama's ass that all you can see is his shit anymore.

935
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:06,200
OK. Well, so this isn't like a favorite quote, but I liked it.

936
00:47:06,760 --> 00:47:10,280
And I want to it bounces off of Sean mentioned

937
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,840
when he was told to put out a cigarette earlier.

938
00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:15,880
He pulls out his like plane ticket or whatever.

939
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:19,040
Let me check something. Yep. I am in Romania.

940
00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:20,920
Are you out of your fucking mind?

941
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:23,360
This whole country is a smoking section.

942
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:26,360
I couldn't remember the exact quote. That's why.

943
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:29,320
Yeah. This next quote starts with the name Baniere,

944
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:31,640
but my phone auto corrected it to beanie.

945
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,840
So I'm just going to read it as my phone has it.

946
00:47:33,840 --> 00:47:35,240
Beanie boy. Yeah.

947
00:47:35,240 --> 00:47:38,440
It's just like beanie. You think you can hide?

948
00:47:38,440 --> 00:47:40,440
Nobody can hide from the Reaper.

949
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:42,680
Are you the Reaper? Yes.

950
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:46,840
Of our time, this and Dog Eat Dog, like the two

951
00:47:46,840 --> 00:47:50,480
Schrader films we've watched for this have been God awful.

952
00:47:51,280 --> 00:47:56,280
This might be my least favorite and least rewatchable film to date.

953
00:47:56,600 --> 00:48:00,840
Dog Eat Dog is at least so weird and has so many just what the fuck moments

954
00:48:01,080 --> 00:48:04,440
that I was entertained and willing to show that I was entertained

955
00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:06,120
enough to watch it twice.

956
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:08,560
I couldn't watch this one the second time.

957
00:48:08,560 --> 00:48:11,040
This one is a bit of a slog.

958
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:15,160
I mean, I still watched it twice, but I'm just made of tougher, stronger stuff.

959
00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:17,560
Yeah, that's fine. I don't. I got that good metal.

960
00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:19,920
Oh, yeah, that's it. You can have that.

961
00:48:19,920 --> 00:48:21,120
You can have that metal.

962
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:23,440
I'm going to I'm going to keep those 90 minutes of my life.

963
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:27,720
Oh, man. Nick, which movie would you like to move forward with?

964
00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:32,400
That's a really tough one, because I've already set the president

965
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:36,320
of liking Army of One.

966
00:48:36,320 --> 00:48:39,000
But this isn't nearly as unhinged as that.

967
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:40,480
No, and that's unfortunate.

968
00:48:40,480 --> 00:48:44,720
Yeah, this one actually should have been more extreme

969
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:47,120
than the true story.

970
00:48:47,800 --> 00:48:49,400
But it wasn't.

971
00:48:49,400 --> 00:48:51,200
No, I mean, Red Rock West.

972
00:48:51,200 --> 00:48:53,600
Yeah, Red Rock West. But just to go to your point real quick,

973
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:56,120
you know, sign up for a Patreon.

974
00:48:56,120 --> 00:48:58,400
And if you give us enough money that we can take enough time off,

975
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:00,720
we'll we'll recut this film with.

976
00:49:00,720 --> 00:49:02,680
Oh, an Army of One mashup. Yeah.

977
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:06,480
Oh, yeah. So we can watch it dark and then mash it up with Army of One.

978
00:49:06,480 --> 00:49:08,520
Yeah, and we'll just replace all of Evan,

979
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:12,360
Evan Lake's characters with Gary with Gary.

980
00:49:12,360 --> 00:49:13,840
I fucking love it.

981
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:18,000
So sign up for a Patreon like and like and subscribe.

982
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:20,880
Next episode, we've got Raising Arizona.

983
00:49:20,880 --> 00:49:25,240
Yes. Trapped in Paradise with Dana Carvey and John Lovitz.

984
00:49:25,240 --> 00:49:28,200
Oh, just to say it again,

985
00:49:28,200 --> 00:49:35,280
Red Rock West one, not yes, not this terrible Paul Schrader movie.

986
00:49:35,280 --> 00:49:37,320
No. All right. Thanks for listening.

987
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:41,120
I'll do more coke next time somewhere awake.

988
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:43,120
Cool. Yeah.

989
00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:44,800
Great review. Subscribe.

990
00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:47,480
Someone give Nick a comment, please. God somebody.

991
00:49:47,480 --> 00:49:49,720
I just want to stop talking about the comments.

992
00:49:50,280 --> 00:49:52,360
Mostly so we can figure out where they are.

993
00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:58,400
All right. All right. From all of us here in my apartment.

994
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:02,200
Good night. God bless.

995
00:50:02,200 --> 00:50:05,800
By Nicholas Cage. Bye.

996
00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:09,680
Or didn't hear that.

997
00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:11,240
God damn it.

998
00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:16,760
More. I just hit myself in the face with my own microphone.

999
00:50:16,760 --> 00:50:18,920
I have done that so many times.

1000
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:20,600
I fucking hate both of you.

1001
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:22,640
Why did you let me talk you into this?

1002
00:50:23,360 --> 00:50:26,400
Well, it sounds like a you problem. I'm aware.

1003
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:29,360
Look, I'm just here because you have a bathroom and limited toilet paper.

1004
00:50:29,360 --> 00:50:49,680
Thanks, Hayden. You're supposed to buy toilet paper today.