Oh, God. Oh, my God.
As someone who's raised pigs and I don't want to get into it.
Yeah, pigs, they're biters, but they're also really smart.
Well, welcome back to cage match with Nick and Sean
colon around about way of meeting Nicholas Cage.
I am your host, Sean, with my cohost Nick and our producer.
Peter. Hello.
This week, we will be discussing two fine films.
Yeah, they will be movies, movies.
Not to give up the goat too much, but I really liked one of them.
Yeah, one of them was great.
Somehow I feel like we're going to have different opinions of what's great.
Considering last week.
No, I think I'd be real disappointed if we didn't agree this week.
We are discussing Pig and cinematic
film left behind
the cinematic, the leavings behind left behind.
I think one of these movies is more.
Right for comedy gold, and we are a comedy podcast,
so let's start with left behind and Nick, why don't you tell us
what this movie was about?
Oh, this movie is about Nicholas Cage, who is a airline pilot.
Yeah, he's a pilot in this movie for an airplane.
Rayford Steel.
Yeah, the dumbest, second dumbest name in the movie.
The dumbest being his son, Rami, because it's spelled R.A.
Y.M.I. I miss that.
Yeah, it's hateful.
Yeah, Nicholas Cage, he's a pilot.
He's going to fly a plane in the movie.
His daughter comes home to surprise him for his birthday for college.
But Nicholas Cage is trying to hook up with this flight attendant.
That's the term these days gets kind of caught in the act by his daughter.
Then he just gets on the plane anyways, with his tickets to go see you, too.
I mean, he had to go.
I mean, he did have to do his job.
Well, at that point, but he was obviously lying the whole time
because he said he like just got called in that morning.
But then he got the tickets and he'd been trying to get them for like two weeks.
So and the show was in London. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. So clearly he had other plans.
He didn't give a shit and didn't care that his daughter was coming home
to surprise him. It was fine.
So they get on the plane.
Oh, Jesus. And then there's Chad Michael Murray.
He plays Jesus.
Yeah. He plays an investigative journalist
who does actually know investigative journalism ever.
And so they had to give him a job that was plot reasonable.
They call him an investigative journalist.
He's just a disaster journalist. Yes.
Like he goes around and films like earthquakes and shit.
That's not investigative journalism.
You know why the earthquake happened and where and who.
And stuff. So it's it's pretty pretty weak.
But wait, Nick, who made the earthquake?
Russell Brand.
Oh, I didn't even put that together. Wow.
Oh, no, I've been thinking about what a dick Russell Brand was this whole time.
It was awful. Yes.
Listen to episode two for context. Yeah. Yeah.
There's all sorts of like callbacks these days now that we've got such a
such a such a large library of content to get you back into it.
Which just a harp on episode two's point again,
this is the third episode and they're hour long episodes.
Go listen to the first two.
Yeah. I mean, you could probably take a dump and listen to a whole episode in one go.
So Rayford Steel flies his stupid plane up into the air.
Something tells me this isn't the movie you like.
I love this movie.
All his stupid daughter, Chloe, is still on the ground and she's all upset.
She like has a bone to pick with Christianity.
Her mom like got all like born again and just went wild with it. Yeah.
Which is really kind of she blames that for her parents failing marriage.
And I don't know, but she went to college.
So it's not like she stuck around to try and help rekindle the passion.
But her poor little brother, Rami, is. Oh, yeah.
The short version of this is Rayford has a bad day at work
because the rapture happens. Yeah.
Yeah. So but it's the dumbest rapture ever.
Can we talk about that Photoshop job of the family?
Oh, the family photo. It's so good.
He looks like he's coming through like an ethereal, like
gauzy veil as he just shifts.
That's the photo we should have used.
Oh, God, that would have been good.
We'll put it up on Twitter. Yeah. Yeah. OK.
Oh, yeah. We have a Twitter now.
Yeah. It was at whatever we made that.
While Rayford is in the air and to get away from her mother,
Chloe takes Rami to the mall where there is a sick hip hop dance group.
They were great doing.
They were actually the best like performers of the movie.
Shockingly true.
But, you know, that's just so we know that this movie is hip
and with it, the best rapture scene they could have had is during the hip hop
dancer team when the guy goes sliding across the floor on his head.
Oh, yeah. If the rapture happened right then and he got raptured,
that would have been sick.
Absolutely. Hat just sliding bucket hat upside down, sliding across the floor.
Fuck, yeah. I want that.
She loses track for a brother for a second, finds them.
And when she goes to embrace him, because, you know, they love each other.
The screen kind of flashes and there's a wow.
And suddenly there's just clothes in her arms.
Yeah, clothes that were like still standing up.
It's like that's a lot of starch.
I don't think that kids hit puberty.
So those socks have no right to be that stiff.
Well, OK, that goes to my.
What's your point coming off of a beat off joke?
So that's my point about this whole movie.
Within this film, all children get raptured.
All children get saved, which I was raised in the Catholic Church.
Not true. Some of them get saved.
Original sin is a thing.
There had to be some 12 year old somewhere.
Now, wait, who was just discovered himself when the rapture happened?
Who's still in his bathroom?
Yeah. So, OK, two things.
I think that puberty is the cutoff, because once you've hit puberty,
you've obviously whacked off.
I discovered myself early and often.
I mean, I to be fair, I had a mustache at nine.
So you earned it while in midair.
Rapture happens.
A sizable chunk of people disappear off the plane.
So obviously, everyone's freaking out.
The cockpit gets bum rushed because the pilot clearly knows what's going on.
There's the bum rushing, though.
And the way he gets them to go back to their seats is and maybe this is what pilots can do.
And I did not fact check this.
He made it so that everyone needed to use their oxygen.
Oh, yeah. He like depressurized the cabin.
Yeah. Well, you know, can that just happen at any time?
That would be terrifying.
No shit. Like one really depressed pilot's like, fuck it.
Depressurized. Take everybody with me.
They're only six hours out from New York, so they bust a bitch and head back to New York.
They were three hours out of three hours.
Yeah, OK. They're flying back to New York.
You're paying more attention than me.
I've watched it twice.
What can I say? I'm sorry.
Yeah, it was rough. That second viewing was definitely over two trips.
While flying back, they have a run in with another plane
that no longer has its crew.
Yeah. Or at least it's pilots.
Some God lovers on that flight.
Yeah. But all Jesus Airways. Yeah. Virgin Airlines.
He's trying to get back to New York.
Can't get in touch with anybody on the ground.
They do hit their wing, strikes the other plane
and they're leaking fuel rapidly.
That's not leaking. They're just draining, draining fuel.
Yeah. At one point, the fuel ignites.
No, there's like a cool fireball in the back of the thing.
But it's not the plane that's on fire.
It's just the fuel.
And, you know, Rayford knows this because Chad Michael Murray
used his stupid camera to take a photo of it and tell him there.
Now we've justified him being an investigative journalist.
All the while, Chloe, who was holding the clothes,
which I have to assume involves underwear,
even though you never see underwear on any of these
saved individuals.
Man, is everyone just like swinging free in the.
Sounds like heaven to me.
Even though she's like holding the clothes, she decides
she's going to initially she's going to try and drive.
But for reasons that happen a lot, that doesn't happen.
Jesus. Yeah. So like she's in the mall.
Oh, Chloe looking for her brother, who, again,
is does she just assume he's now naked roaming the streets?
But like goes to the nearest hospital
and breaks in to find her brother,
who again disappeared while in her arms.
It's kind of weird to me that they locked the door to the hospital.
Also, like there's only 30 people in the front of that thing. Yeah. Yeah.
And she's just like, I can't stand in this line.
No window smash. Yeah.
But OK, so the sidebar there,
I like that she's just fucking rolling around
and she looks at the TV and the news is up and it's like chaos at the hospital.
And the next scene, she's at the hospital.
It's like her initial thought is just, oh, my God, the hospital is off the hook.
I got to go there.
Ramy could be there.
It's like, why would Ramy have gone to the hospital?
I hate her.
Oh, and she sees the ambulance.
It's like, is he in there?
Oh, yeah. Is it Ramy?
The cops are getting the fuck back.
It's like the only time I've respected a cop is when he tells her to back the fuck up.
So God damn, this movie sucks.
She makes she makes her way home to find.
Her mom was ready because her mom was like warning her about the
the rapture at the beginning of the film.
And then right when it was time to go up, her mom was like,
I'm going to clean myself for Jesus takes a shower.
So, you know, no clothes up behind just just the necklace that
Chloe made, which was a plot point.
She would have been real like moist, though, like she was raptured wet.
Yeah.
Damp for Jesus. Damp for Jesus.
Leah Thompson, too, from Back to the Future.
Yeah, it was a rough time, I guess, in 2014.
OK, so yeah, she goes to the hospital.
Not there goes home, goes home.
Mom's jewelry is just sitting in the shower.
Oh, did we neglect to say she was in a shower?
Was I just talking about how wet she was?
Yeah, no, we talked about that.
She was in the shower.
Oh, got raptured.
Gets a voicemail from her dad who has a satellite phone.
Yeah, because he's a pilot.
He's a pilot. And Chad Michael Murray also has a satellite phone
because he's an investigative journalist.
Investigative journalist.
Also, we forgot to mention that Chloe and Chad Michael Murray's character Buck
met in the airport and kind of hit it off, including after she blows him off.
He gives her a kiss on the cheek because that's a completely normal thing
to do to a stranger.
But she gets a voicemail from her dad.
If you're Joe Biden, I guess.
The second the.
Topical humor.
I'm the Murphy Brown of podcasts.
She gets a voicemail from her father,
which is right before the impact with the other plane.
So she thinks her dad's dead.
So she does the only logical thing left.
Walk to a bridge and climb to the top of it.
Oh, yeah.
All the while back in the air, Buck
and Rayford, I keep wanting to say Raymond, but Rayford.
Yeah, I know.
Try to keep the crew and the passengers of the flight
together and safe.
All while quickly running out of fuel, going down.
This movie goes out of its way to introduce characters that you
this is all Christian propaganda.
I missed that part.
So it goes out of its way to introduce characters
that clearly aren't going to get raptured.
It takes an hour for the rapture to happen.
Oh, you are. Yeah. OK.
Yeah. It's a full hour before anybody gets raptured.
But they seem to go out of the way to like be like, see, we're not judging people.
But the one actual God spearing character on the plane
doesn't get raptured, who just happens to be Muslim.
I mean, he probably did something else in his life.
What about the old lady?
Her husband got raptured. That was fucked up.
So there's an old lady dementia.
Yeah, she's old, has dementia husband.
I'm not going to like say I'm buying into every stereotype, but he was Jewish.
They made a Jewish stereotype.
He got raptured, which I'm pretty sure is a New Testament thing.
But the sweet old lady doesn't get raptured.
Nope. Satanist.
And she probably likes butt stuff.
God hates butt stuff.
Oh, Chloe.
Chloe goes to see her mother's pastor.
Oh, yeah. Pastor doesn't get.
He doesn't get raptured because, you know, you have to.
You can't just say it. You have to believe in your heart.
Yeah. Yeah. He stopped believing.
Although I wanted to make some assumptions about him, but they weren't Catholic.
So, you know, Remy was probably fun.
He's going to talk in the same scene about like how, you know, he he doesn't believe
he doesn't feel it.
But then he's also going to say like God took your mom and brother
to save them and protect them.
And it's like, well, which is it? Do you believe or not believe?
Yeah. Well, you have to believe now.
Do you? I mean, I don't know.
I believe less. Yeah.
Oh, I believe in the power of good drugs.
Yeah. So Rayford seems to be the only person who puts two and two together
on the plane as to what's going on.
Also, the drug. Yeah.
Drug addled British lady.
Yes. But you can't trust a British person.
So who was and they don't
refer to his realization of it.
He was just sort of like, it's like, well, it must be the rapture
because my wife told me about the rapture.
Jesus. Yes. Yeah.
And this is also pilots watch as, of course, John three, 16.
Yes, that's it.
In like gold foil.
Yeah, it was so bad.
It's so shitty.
That scene, it was killing me because he's like going through the wallet
and just throwing random stuff.
And one of the things he pulls out is like a laminated card
that just says visa.
Oh, yeah. And just looks like the old like visa logo in card form.
It was pretty good.
At least we knew what it was because in 2014, nobody's ever seen a debit card
before. So Chloe in her bad day
almost gets hit by a car that goes careening through the mall.
Yeah. A car that had no driver, but the engine revs as it speeds through them all.
And the woman, the passenger is already dead before it crashes.
I didn't even notice a passenger.
Yeah, there's a bleeding passengers already dead.
No airbags go off in this car.
Then goes to her car because she, you know, drove there.
So a single prop airplane comes careening out of the sky into her car.
And then while walking to the hospital under a bridge,
some guy, somebody on a moped revs up, drives by, steals her purse.
And then this has to be at least 20 minutes since the beginning of the rapture.
I mean, you could really call this like Chloe's no good, very bad day.
The biggest laugh of this entire movie comes from the short person getting thrown.
No, that's that's good.
But no, my favorite scene is when Chloe is walking through the city,
there is some disheveled clothes of an unhoused person next to the end is near sign.
And somebody has scratched out the word near and written here.
Did did the homeless guy do it before he went?
He's like, what? One second, God.
All right. What's that here?
But where did someone stop while freaking out to update this guy's sign?
Finally get back in touch with Chloe on the ground.
They need a runway because there's nothing at the airport
and they don't have enough gas to go inland.
So she finds a stretch of highway that's being worked on to land them on.
She gets a big truck to move stuff out of the way and then lights
lights a big fire for them to see so they can see the landing strip.
They land. Everyone survives.
It's kind of a crash landing. That's not a good one.
Now, I mean, they lose their landing gear on some power lines.
Yeah, but but everyone survives and we kind of have a happy ending
only to view the world that is now on fire because it is the Rapture.
And there are seven years of hell on Earth coming. Honestly, the
when they get off the plane
is literally the only part like the only part of this movie
where I saw something that made me say, hell, yeah, it's
the Muslim guy throws the little person off the side of the airplane.
So my biggest question about this film
is who are these made for?
Is this just weird like snuff porn for Christians?
Like, haha, these losers are going to go through seven years of hell.
Like, the producers seem to know well enough that you need to make the characters
somewhat relatable and likable because they're not horrible.
The performances aren't terrible and the characters aren't the worst.
We're watching different movies.
That wasn't good.
That wasn't good, but you guys upsold this so much
as to how terrible it's going to be.
And I was just like, this is fine.
The characters are just like skin deep.
Yes. Like there's nothing to them.
There's no character.
I mean, so was Jujitsu.
I love that movie.
Jujitsu didn't bother giving us fake occupations for people
that we have to like somehow
decide this is who they are based on what they do. Right.
I mean, you have Jordan Sparks playing a mom whose kid gets raptured.
And then she thinks that it's some conspiracy theory from her NFL
quarterback husband, ex-husband.
She's the one who pulls the gun in the third act that I didn't see coming.
Right. These characters like this.
It makes no sense.
I mean, I guess they're from the book. But at the end of the film,
so bad at the end of the film, they all survive, which
the director, the writers seem to know you have to have some type of narrative
with protagonists that you have to root for
for there to be a story arc.
But at the end of all of it, they're still all going to hell.
Supposedly.
I mean, maybe he can like Rayford and Chad, Michael Murray.
Buck can, I don't know, rekindle the faith in humanity.
I'm never going to read.
Yeah. Can you know, can you like win the rapture?
I don't think so. Can you pray real hard?
I'm not sure. I don't understand
the impetus of these films.
Is it to is it to convert us?
Because they do not do a good job of depicting Christians in this film
as reasonable people you'd want to hang out with.
One of the first scenes in the film is Chad Michael Murray's character signing
like newspapers with articles he's written.
And this woman comes in because people give a shit about that. Yes.
But this woman comes up and she like just starts browbeating him with like,
it's God's plan and blah, blah, blah.
And Chloe walks up and she's like, hey, leave the guy alone.
You're crazy.
And, you know, we live in a fallen world. Yeah.
And that's their depiction of a good Christian.
On the second view, and I really felt
bad for acknowledging this, but the movie got a lot better
when the Christians were gone.
That's kind of my point. Yeah.
Like you can't base a movie around these people who are fine
and don't have problems.
Well, problems that they perceive.
Everything thematic about this movie is so disgustingly heavy handed.
Yes. That I think it should put anybody off.
But to answer your question, these movies get made
because there's a big market for Christian film.
Nick is building a collection of Nick Cage films.
This was one of them, so I didn't have to rent it so I could just watch the blu ray.
There's one quote.
There's one review on the back of the box that I'd like to read to you guys.
An action packed thriller that will take viewers on a wild ride
through the day of the rapture.
Willie Robertson, Duck Dynasty. Yeah.
That was their get.
Which I mean, as far as like Christian gets is pretty big.
Like that guy has like four books out
that are always sitting next to each other at Hobby Lobby.
Of course. I did see an interview with him.
I'm surprised you know anything about Willie Duckman.
I did never be surprised by me knowing dumb shit.
I mean, there is not terrible action in this film.
You can see where the budget runs out.
Like the plane goes from looking like a plane to like early
or to late 90s CG real quick.
The director only has six credits.
On his IMDb for directing, he has a bunch in stunt man work and stunt coordination.
Antibiotic
Yeah, he's a stunt man. He's a stunt man.
But his only other notable thing on his IMDb is he directed
an episode of the Young Indiana Jones Adventures.
So that makes sense because he was a stunt man.
Yes. On the Indiana Jones movie.
Yes. Right. So like his book, which I thought was this is probably
the most fascinating thing about this is my life as Indiana Jones, James Bond,
Everyone cool.
That is pretty great.
Yeah.
These are the things you think about when you're bored.
And you're going to be bored a lot when you watch Left Behind.
Basically don't watch Left Behind.
No.
There is a Left Behind 2, Rise of the Antichrist, in pre-production right now, directed and
starring Kevin Sorbo as Rayford Steele.
Oh Jesus, Kevin Sorbo.
Oh God, that makes me infuriated.
I mean, we went from Kirk Cameron to Nicolas Cage, the improvement to Kevin Sorbo.
Which is really worse than Kirk Cameron.
Yeah.
Wow, that sucks.
Yeah.
Nick, this is a hard one for this.
Jesus, I don't have a quote.
Do you have a quote?
No.
I did have one quote and it is not from the movie, but it is from Nicolas Cage being interviewed
about this film while doing the press junket.
And he was asked about how most actors would shy away from religious films.
And his quote, trying to sell this film as something he cared about was that thing of
beauty.
If you look carefully at my filmography, I do gravitate at times towards spiritual and
spirituality as spiritually themed movies like City of Angels or Knowing, or even movies
like Ghost Rider.
Deep spirituality in that one.
That was.
Oh, that made me so happy.
Like, wow, you do not care.
Oh my God.
So yeah, that was left behind.
It's a movie.
Don't watch it.
Anything else you want to say about it before we get to our second film?
In the mall, when everybody gets raptured and all the kids and stuff, there's kids
clothing falling from the ceiling.
Why were the kids in the ceiling?
Just parents that are sick of their kids that day.
It could have been one of those cool malls that had like, you know, like a roller coaster.
Did not appear to be one.
I don't think there was anything cool in this movie.
I agree.
I there.
Except for the little person.
That's a pig.
That's a movie, too.
That is a movie.
And it's it's in fact a movie we're going to cover right now.
Nice.
It's a it's a sad film, but for different reasons and left behind.
I mean, it's and by that, I mean, it's a movie that is kind of sad and is emotional.
Well, we're in serious movies right now.
We are in serious movies.
This is why we break him down and switch up, because some weeks are going to be harder
than others.
We're going to have a new 9-11 film that's coming up someday.
But yeah, the long and short of Pig, Nicholas Cage plays a weird isolationist living out
in the Oregon woods with his truffle pig.
They have a great relationship.
Pig even has its own little bed next to Nick Cage's.
Nick Cage makes delicious foods and feeds his pig and they have a great life together.
Nick Cage plays Rob and once a week, Amir, young businessman from Portland, comes to
buy his truffles and bring in supplies.
They don't seem to like each other buys the truffles with supplies.
It's like, here's some D cell batteries for your ghetto blaster.
Rob and his pig enjoy a nice little life together.
One night, Rob lays his sweet head down when his door gets kicked in.
Pig gets bagged and he gets frying pan to the skull with an amazing foley as he gets
hit.
Wakes up the next day, contacts Amir who shows up in his yellow.
I think it's a Camaro.
It's Camaro.
It's Camaro is really angry that he has to like drive all this way and.
Takes Rob to the big city, the Portland.
Well, he takes him on a circuit real quick to other truffle hunters and kind of gets
like because he had a brief description of the truck, a turquoise pickup.
So they find the meth heads who stole the pig.
Yeah, through a very short series of events.
Yes.
Two stops.
They go to the meth heads and confront them, but they're like, oh, we don't have the pig
anymore.
And that's about all the help they were.
So they returned to Portland for Rob to introduce Amir to the seedy underbelly of the Portland
restaurant scene, which involves literal underground fight clubs.
Fight being a misnomer.
Well, I mean, growing up in Portland and having worked in, you know, one or two kitchens.
Yeah.
I get just punched in the face for money.
But no, obviously, if you were paying attention, the restaurant workers pay to punch homeless
people.
Oh, OK.
Yeah, it was like a letting out frustration.
Having to deal with rich folks being in your restaurant, just being an asshole.
It's still not a fight.
You're dealing with a pretty chef, all that kind of stuff.
Still doesn't seem like a fight club.
No, no, it's definitely just like buying the right to punch.
OK, knock a dude's teeth in who nobody's going to care about because he's a homeless dude
and he just made 300 bucks.
Yeah.
OK, this makes a little more sense.
Yeah.
I mean, it does.
It's horrible.
So, yeah, I've punched a homeless guy for money.
No.
Well, you paid you paid for the privilege.
Yeah.
He made some money.
No rapture for me.
Rob goes revealing that he is, in fact, famous chef Robin Feld, who mysteriously disappeared
10 years ago, presumably to go live in the woods with a pig.
Fifteen.
Fifteen years ago.
I'm the detail guy.
Clearly, I have notes.
He gets the name of a restaurant, which is a highfalutin gastropub.
So he gets a mirror to use his connections to get him to get them lunch reservations.
I also like the scene.
We kind of skipped over it when Rob goes to his old home.
Oh, oh, stranger danger.
Yeah.
That's a weird thing.
That was a weird scene, but it did make me think like maybe left behind.
Got it right.
All kids do go to heaven because that kid fucking rules.
All right.
Yeah.
There's a kid playing a handpan in a backyard and Rob's just wandering through his old
neighborhood and pokes that around the corner.
Again, I mean, being freshly beaten, an eight year old just hanging out on the back porch
by himself.
The kid did turn and look at him and be like, does your face hurt?
Yes.
He's like, yeah.
And they talk about a persimmon tree, which.
Yeah.
Because what you talk to kids about is weird fruits.
Yeah.
Like persimmons, which are delicious.
I used to have a persimmon tree in my backyard.
No, that.
Yeah.
Outside of stranger danger.
That was really cool scene.
So they show up to lunch the next day.
Very fancy place.
The woman, the waitress describes for almost two solid minutes this deconstructed scallop
dish, with like an egg corn fusion bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
All the while, Rob, who was disheveled to start with, hasn't cleaned up the blood from
his frying pan wound or the blood from getting his face punched in and is still just wearing
his dirty, dirty old union suit.
I love that he wears a union.
Yeah.
He just wears old dirty ass like.
Union suit.
Keep it weird.
Can't say it any better.
Yes.
Keep it weird, Portland.
No dress code.
So dress code or curl.
I did a little little reading about this particular aspect because they were like, why didn't
you have Rob clean himself up?
And apparently they were doing test makeup on Nick Cage and just like got them all fucking
beat up looking and then took a break and went and got coffee and nobody said anything
or asked anything or raised an eyebrow.
And they were like, well, fuck in Portland.
Yeah.
So that just became the thing.
It was like, well, Rob wouldn't give a shit.
So here we go.
I didn't know the the story of the caked blood test makeup.
That's amazing.
It really makes it a little better.
And like previously, I probably would have griped about him not cleaning up.
But then, I mean, you get into the character of him himself.
It's like all his clothes are fucking filthy.
You never asked for a different shirt.
The restaurant scene is probably my favorite scene from the film because they wind up questioning
the chef who also should be said Amir's father, who's also in the restaurant tour game, sells
to this restaurant specifically.
So Amir is not supposed to be there.
They're not supposed to cross the streams.
But Rob confronts the chef who turns out to have been fired by Rob from his restaurant.
Years ago, it was the chef's first job.
Got fired for always overcooking the pasta.
And Rob completely eviscerates this guy by being like, what did you tell me when I fired
you?
You wanted to open an old English pub.
What happened to that dream?
These people don't care about you.
Tears this guy down.
But of course, all signs point to Amir's father being the individual who hired aforementioned
the meth addicts to kidnap the pig.
Yeah.
The chef was being real dodgy about it all.
Yeah.
About where he was getting those truffles for the fall menu.
So Rob rightfully loses his shit on Amir, kicks the shit out of Amir's car.
Yeah.
And then he goes to Amir to give up his father's address.
Rob steals a bike and an amazing scene where Rob just runs up on some guy's porch, grabs
the bike.
The guy tries to stop him and fully cages out and just screams in his face and walks
away.
Yeah.
To be fair, if a guy who was whose face entire face was caked in blood, just grabbed my bike
and yelled at me, I mean, it's fine.
It's yours now.
He goes and meets Amir's dad, who is a real son of a bitch, and tells him if he ever comes
back, he's going to, well, offers him a bunch of money and tells him if he ever comes back,
he's going to turn the pig to bacon.
All right.
So no, the scene that I loved, he's in his old restaurant talking to his old baker and
he's just looking and it's the entire conversation is a single camera from a weird like Dutch
angle over the shoulder.
And he just like, you changed it.
And she's like, it wasn't me.
You're a chef.
I'm a baker.
And it's just this great little moment of him sitting in a thing he built that is no
longer there.
And it's sad and beautiful.
But something else has come from it and someone else has succeeded in that space.
And I really appreciated that.
Yeah, she explains that she had kept the restaurant the same and operated the same for a couple
years just because she thought he was going to come back.
But but of course, he did not.
So so she was left behind.
Cage comes in and like in this attempt to get like this last ditch attempt to get information
about the pig out of Amir's dad, he prepares this meal because we've established like with
the chef from the other restaurant that Rob has an insane memory.
He doesn't forget people.
And he'll say in this scene, like he remembers everybody he served and he remembers every
meal he's ever made for a person.
So when he goes and he makes this meal for Amir's dad, like he gets Amir in and like
sends him on a shopping list, but teaches him how to make this meal, this meal that
was like the only time Amir has ever described his parents as being happy was after this
meal.
So he's just I don't think he's doing it maliciously.
He's trying to like extend an olive branch and he's like, hey, man, remember this really
good time you had with your wife, who I do not know is just a fucking vegetable hospital
room.
And you get to see his dad go through and you like you see him like try the different
things.
He eats the pigeon and it's what it was.
You know, you see the look on his face and he's like, oh man, like this pigeon fucking
rocks.
Like I didn't think pigeon was so good, but that's great.
And then like he takes another bite of something and it's like, okay, this is also great.
It's like slowly like just coming up out of like the depths in him where he's starting
to recognize this meal.
And then he drinks this like special wine that Rob had had Amir get from like his private
like wine cellar.
When Amir's dad drinks this wine, it's like everything just fucking comes back to him
and he's like, I know exactly when I had this meal and it was the last good meal.
So he like he drinks the wine and he's just like, fuck.
He's just wrecked inside because all he can think about is now his wife and just this
connection that the three of them had that can never happen again.
Yeah.
I think that was probably the more emotional moment for me.
Yeah.
That one hit for me too.
And one of the pieces of that that I thought was kind of interesting is that as Rob is
pouring that wine, he says, your son found this.
Yeah.
He gives the kid the credit for everything.
Yeah.
So Rob, to rehumanize this person reminds him of the one good meal he had with his comatose
wife.
Dad completely breaks down, loses his shit only to reveal that the pig died, that it
was the meth heads.
The meth heads will be, you know, a little too rough with it.
I don't think it's that kind of roughness.
I think they were just like, it doesn't matter.
They were shitty meth heads doing shitty meth head things and they fucked this pig up.
So yeah, Nick Cage loses his shit.
And you know, this is a perfect time, cage opportunity to just let it out.
It's a silent scene.
It's a sad man.
Like real actual kind of emotional grieving.
Yeah.
This is a really stoic film.
I was kind of surprised that it didn't have more freak out moments.
Like he just like takes his lumps.
Yeah.
You know, that that's the most visceral scene for sure.
Yeah.
And it's silent.
Peter and I saw the trailer for this film together for the first time.
This movie was really kind of sold visually as man loses pig and John wicks around Portland.
And it is not that.
No, it's a real like drama.
Yeah.
Like just real case study and like what are our relationships with food, animals, parents,
significant others and what do we do when they go away?
It's a really beautiful scene where they're in a diner and Rob says, I'm going to paraphrase
here because I don't remember the exact quote, but you know, if I didn't go to Portland,
if I didn't go looking for in my head, she'd still be alive.
And it was just like, but she wouldn't pay.
Rob goes, she wouldn't pay.
That's that's I mean, that's that's where the crying started.
The last scene in this film is Rob returning back to his shack playing a tape of his deceased
wife that she recorded for his birthday of her playing guitar and singing I'm on fire
while he sits on his bed and looks at his now deceased pig's bed.
That scene kind of broke me.
I cried a lot.
And I hugged my dog for a solid 10 minutes.
Yeah, so that's pig.
It's a I mean, I thought it was a really solid movie.
It's not perfect, but I don't I don't know how you are with movies, Nick.
Did this feel emotional to you?
Yeah, do you have feelings?
Do you have feelings?
This is actually an intervention, Nick.
The last two episodes have just been set up for this conversation.
Just really to get me in here. Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, it's an emotional movie.
I love my dog.
I love my girlfriend.
I could see myself feeling similarly if I had lost either.
I think what actually
so the most emotional part of the movie for me
was when Nick Cage, because it's not like Nick Cage
just makes this meal for Amir's dad.
This whole like relationship with Amir and his dad and mom is kind of set up.
And like Amir has said that his mom is dead.
She killed herself where we eventually do find out that she's just in a vegetative state.
She's not even dead.
He can't like communicate, talk to her or anything like that.
And the father, I'm assuming, doesn't ever visit her.
Well, and she's only alive because the father pays for the pays for the medical care.
Right. Amir says, you know, why won't dad just let you die?
I wish he'd let you die.
Can we talk about Rob and Amir's relationship?
Like how it grows from Amir's trying to start a business?
Well, the first scene that you have Amir and Rob together, Rob doesn't talk to him.
It's like he sees Amir showing up, gets the cooler with the truffles,
sets it to the side, continues darning his pants while Amir comes up.
I mean, it's pretty funny watching him in the background
trying to walk around the pig without getting dirty.
And I mean, he just hates the pig.
He keeps calling it a little sucker and things like that.
And just comes up is a loudmouth, gets nothing from Rob,
sets down the cooler with his batteries and shit in it, batteries and flour.
And then Rob just takes it and goes inside and it's like slams the door.
Yeah, it's like a little, yeah, it's like you.
And he's a big like
he's concerned about like disasters.
They Amir talks about like, oh, we could just go to Mount Hood or whatever.
And like, well, well, sorry, let me back up.
Cage is talking about how like there's going to be an earthquake every like 200 years,
and it's going to send a tsunami inland that's going to flood
everything, presumably from the cascades over.
And Amir is like, well, we could go to hood.
And Nick Cage is like, hoods an active volcano.
And it's like, oh, fuck, that's pretty much.
Amir responds with, well, I'm not fucking moving to Seattle.
And Rob goes, fuck Seattle. Yeah.
That was pretty good.
I mean, that's one of the most honest moments of the movie,
because I don't know anybody in Portland who really likes Seattle.
And it goes both ways like Portland.
But then they they really build into like an actual friendship.
Yeah. Where they kind of know and respect each other a little bit.
And when Amir drops Rob off at the end of the film, the last thing Rob says to Amir is,
so I'll see you Thursday.
Yeah. Then Amir goes and cries in his car for a while.
I got fun facts.
It's some fun facts. Let's do some quotes.
You know, I think the only thing that I really wanted to say is like,
I thought the visuals in this were really good.
It's a very dark film. Yes.
And I wish it had been a little more lit,
but it's a first time director and like basically a first time DP.
Yeah. I mean, they did pretty fucking well.
I mean, that's kind of the most interesting thing about this film.
It was done on a shoestring budget.
Like it was done on so little money that I couldn't find
how much money it cost to make this thing.
An actual fun fact.
This is Nick Cage's 100th feature film.
Oh, the Century Mark.
Good job. You did it, buddy.
Yeah. The budget was so small, they couldn't afford a trained pig.
They had like a couple of weeks to try and train this pig,
who is only in like 10 minutes of the film.
But apparently this thing would just continue to bite Nicholas Cage.
Nicholas Cage was made a joke.
He'd been, you know, set on fire, flipped over in cars.
And ultimately, what was going to kill him was sepsis from being bitten by a pig.
As an act of respect to the pig,
the director requested that no ham or bacon be served
on set while the pig was on set.
Apparently, he did not win this fight.
Well, you know, your crew's got to have bacon.
At this point, let's do some quotes.
If you guys have any favorite quotes.
I mean, mine was Rob stealing the bike and when the guy goes, hey, he just goes.
That is good.
I just liked Rob at the restaurant.
Just getting into Derek,
just the like nihilist gravity of like him saying it.
And he just like cuts him apart.
He just says, Derek, why do you care about these people?
They don't care about you.
None of them.
They don't even know you because you haven't shown them.
Every day you wake up and there will be less of you.
You live your life for them
and they don't even see you, you don't even see yourself.
We don't get a lot of things to really care about.
That's like, damn.
Yeah, good.
That's actually the most he says in like one solid chunk, the entire movie.
Well, like I said, that was probably my favorite scene of the film.
Yeah, it was a great scene.
I think my favorite was Rob saying, I don't fuck my pig.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah. Well, we're being like straight up accused of fucking.
A pig.
Yeah, you got to go to bat against that.
Yeah, at least set the record.
Yeah.
Yeah. OK.
So, I mean, that brings us to the point.
This is a competition.
So one movie has to advance.
And one movie will be left behind.
It's pig.
Pig will be left behind.
Left behind going all the way, baby.
All the way.
16 seeds every time.
No, no, no, pig, pig.
It's big. Please.
I could pig for.
I could watch pig right now.
I could watch pig immediately after finishing pig pig wins.
Yeah, that was what I think was most interesting to me is that this feels like a movie that
I could just have on and like enjoy.
Yeah. You know, it's like it's a sad movie and it's kind of not like gripping,
but it's good.
It's come. Every scene is compelling.
Yeah, you pay attention to it.
It's not a thriller.
OK, so that one wins.
Yeah, no, that one's not.
This is this is this this week is less of a competition
more than it was a slog to watch Christian cinema.
So next week on PageMatch.
Yes, it's Birdie and Wicker Man.
Yeah, it should be great. Never seen either.
It'll be an interesting one.
I'm curious to see what we get out of this.
Also, huge thanks to Peter for doing the amazing Photoshop work
that you see when you listen to our video and listen to our recordings.
Photoshop's so good, it could be in left behind.
Oh, it's better than that.
That is now the minutes thing you ever said.
So, yeah, I mean, as usual, follow us on everything.
All the podcast networks that you can find.
Smash that like button.
Yeah, we need five star ratings only even if you hate us.
Yeah. Do it out of spite.
Yeah, it's quite like us.
Hey, if you don't like my voice, five star rating.
Yeah, right.
Let's be really, really stick it to us.
Be honest. Most of the cage films you've all watched have been out of irony.
So ironically, give us five stars.
Yeah, we love irony.
PageMatch. Fun.
I still heard that.
Yeah.
I'm trying, guys.
Yeah, we might need a different strategy on this.
All right, straws from now on.
We have straws.
I apologize.
We should really start like dog bowls full of big sparkle.
I'm telling you, ASMR channel.
Yeah, that's great.
We're no longer a sports podcast.
We're not here for ASMR.
I'll ask my ex-spouse who listens to this, what they think of the mouth noises.
Oh, God, don't call them mouth noises.