1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,660 Oh, God. Oh, my God. 2 00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:13,760 Yeah. 3 00:00:14,860 --> 00:00:15,500 Absolutely. 4 00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:17,860 You start in the mid-cut mid-sentence. 5 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,220 We did bits all before. 6 00:00:21,220 --> 00:00:23,720 We did joke bits of how we're going to start this that were better 7 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:25,500 than what we're actually starting with. 8 00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:27,760 Yeah. Oh, well. 9 00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:31,000 Hi. Welcome to Cage Match. 10 00:00:31,900 --> 00:00:34,240 Colon, a roundabout way of meeting Nicolas Cage. 11 00:00:35,140 --> 00:00:38,040 I am your host, Sean, with my host Nick. 12 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:40,700 That's me. I'm Nick. 13 00:00:40,700 --> 00:00:42,540 And our producer, Peter. Hello. 14 00:00:44,540 --> 00:00:48,740 So a quick breakdown of what we're doing here is we've decided 15 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:52,400 by purely scientific metrics what the 16 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,840 top 64 Nicolas Cage films are. 17 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,000 And from there, we're going to break it down to. 18 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:00,340 What? The best. 19 00:01:00,340 --> 00:01:02,940 Yeah. We're going to take it 64 to one. 20 00:01:03,340 --> 00:01:08,180 And by the time we finish, we're really going to have 21 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:10,680 one hell of a Nicolas Cage film collection. 22 00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:15,780 Yes. And we'll have watched all of them, half of them twice. 23 00:01:16,380 --> 00:01:17,880 Yeah. Most of them. 24 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:20,040 A quarter of them three times. 25 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,380 So we're doing this until we go insane. 26 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:25,580 Yeah, it's a it's a pretty straightforward bracket. 27 00:01:25,580 --> 00:01:28,400 We did it kind of a sweet 16 style. 28 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,780 I don't know. We recorded some of the conversation of it. 29 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:35,700 Who knows? Maybe someday somebody will listen to it. 30 00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:37,580 That's for the patrons. 31 00:01:37,580 --> 00:01:39,540 It was it was awful. 32 00:01:39,540 --> 00:01:41,140 I wouldn't listen to it if I were you. 33 00:01:41,140 --> 00:01:43,500 It's the highest quality recording. 34 00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:44,780 Yeah, the recording was great. 35 00:01:44,780 --> 00:01:45,800 The recording was fine. 36 00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:49,280 Peter did a fantastic job, but it still included Sean and I. 37 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:52,140 Yeah, that's really the worst part of any endeavor. We. 38 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:54,680 Endeavor. Yeah. 39 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:56,040 I didn't think that sounds through. 40 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:58,480 No, that's cool. We got there. 41 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:00,940 So we're going to we're going to break it down. 42 00:02:00,940 --> 00:02:05,080 We kind of did a like zones like character roles, 43 00:02:05,180 --> 00:02:07,740 sort of like funny guys, action guys, 44 00:02:07,740 --> 00:02:10,100 and we're going to pit them against each other. 45 00:02:10,940 --> 00:02:12,040 Conference style. 46 00:02:12,040 --> 00:02:14,540 I don't know. I don't know why I'm still talking. 47 00:02:14,900 --> 00:02:18,280 Peter will probably put this bracket up online where you can see it 48 00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:21,080 on the Internet. Oh, absolutely. 49 00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:24,880 We have to figure out if cage match dot fun is available. 50 00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:27,800 Hmm. Sounds like a good one. 51 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,740 I mean, we could probably find that out. 52 00:02:29,740 --> 00:02:31,940 Hey, let's just start pitching it right now. 53 00:02:31,940 --> 00:02:33,240 Cage match dot fun. 54 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:36,500 That's where you're going to find all of our like errata 55 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:38,800 and erotica. 56 00:02:40,140 --> 00:02:42,800 In case we need it later, let's take some alternate takes at 57 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:46,580 cage match dot net cage match dot org 58 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:49,100 cage match dot gov. 59 00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:52,900 Yeah, I'm pretty sure we can't get gov dot edu. 60 00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:55,340 This is an educational show. 61 00:02:55,340 --> 00:02:58,280 We can actually classify it as that with our podcast, too. 62 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:00,100 So that's perfect. Yeah. 63 00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:03,340 So the first films we decided to pit against each other were 64 00:03:03,980 --> 00:03:07,800 Face Off and Jujitsu from 2020. 65 00:03:08,180 --> 00:03:11,740 These are both great movies for a lot of reasons. 66 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,980 Which one do we want to start with? 67 00:03:14,980 --> 00:03:18,140 Should we should we go with the one everyone knows so we can surprise people 68 00:03:18,140 --> 00:03:20,780 with the yeah, that's your beauty that is Jujitsu. 69 00:03:20,940 --> 00:03:23,100 Why don't you tell me all about Face Off? 70 00:03:23,100 --> 00:03:26,180 I hadn't seen this movie probably since high school. 71 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,040 Oh, it's like one of the Holy Trinity of cage movies. 72 00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:30,140 It's I don't know. 73 00:03:30,140 --> 00:03:33,800 I've probably seen it every at least every other year, I feel like 74 00:03:34,340 --> 00:03:36,580 of my life since 1997. 75 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:40,880 So the long and short of it is John Travolta plays 76 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:44,640 an FBI agent, Sean Archer, Sean Archer, 77 00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:48,340 who is doing his best Nicola Cage, Nicholas Cage impression 78 00:03:48,340 --> 00:03:50,640 for the first 20 minutes of the film, 79 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:56,420 tracking down notorious domestic terrorist 80 00:03:56,420 --> 00:03:59,080 Castor Troy, nailed it. 81 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:05,180 Amazing name who starts off this movie with an amazing mustache. 82 00:04:05,180 --> 00:04:08,080 And I am sad that it's gone within five minutes. 83 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,240 Yeah, that mustache was real sweet. 84 00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:13,880 It really actually kind of sold a lot of the lines he said. 85 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:17,940 He says later in the movie, but does not get to attach to the stash. 86 00:04:17,940 --> 00:04:23,140 Re-watching this film, I realized that 99% of Nic Cage memes 87 00:04:23,140 --> 00:04:24,340 I use come from this film. 88 00:04:25,220 --> 00:04:27,380 Yeah, yeah, it's really got everything. 89 00:04:27,620 --> 00:04:29,380 We got derailed off the plot, though. 90 00:04:29,380 --> 00:04:33,020 Yes. So either way, the movie starts off with Castor Troy 91 00:04:33,780 --> 00:04:37,620 drinking a milkshake while attempting to assassinate Sean Archer, 92 00:04:37,940 --> 00:04:41,720 shooting Sean Archer, missing his heart, but killing his son. 93 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:43,840 It was real tragic. There was a lot of crying. 94 00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:49,980 This is a John Woo film, so lots of doves and bad children in peril, 95 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,380 bad child actors in peril. 96 00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:56,680 That's fair. We don't actually know if any of the children were, in fact, bad 97 00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:58,680 when they were in peril. 98 00:04:58,680 --> 00:05:00,740 It could have been perfectly fine children. 99 00:05:00,740 --> 00:05:03,320 Hi. Which I argue do not exist. 100 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:06,040 I was going to say. So either way, 101 00:05:07,780 --> 00:05:10,280 Castor Troy and his brother stick a bomb. 102 00:05:10,280 --> 00:05:12,280 Stick a bomb. What's his brother's name? 103 00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:14,280 In LA. Pop quiz. 104 00:05:14,540 --> 00:05:17,320 I do not remember. Pollux. Pollux. That's right. 105 00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:20,640 I just watched this movie this morning. 106 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:22,680 Pollux Troy, that's right. 107 00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:26,280 Played by someone I don't know. Unnecessary. 108 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:29,980 But they create a bomb, hide it in the L.A. 109 00:05:29,980 --> 00:05:33,920 Convention Center that is meant to blow up a square mile of L.A. 110 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:37,780 and the fallout will wreak havoc across California, I assume. 111 00:05:37,780 --> 00:05:39,780 Yeah, probably. I mean. 112 00:05:40,900 --> 00:05:45,100 But Sean Archer, loosely defined bomb, loosely defined bomb, 113 00:05:45,340 --> 00:05:49,940 has him dead to rights, catches him at the airport, shoot out and sues. 114 00:05:50,180 --> 00:05:55,540 Castor Troy gets karate kicked into a jet engine. 115 00:05:55,540 --> 00:05:58,740 Yeah, like a jet engine, like a turbine that was just set up 116 00:05:58,740 --> 00:06:01,180 in a warehouse and just kind of running unattended. 117 00:06:01,780 --> 00:06:05,380 Oh, no, he was kicked into the console that was right behind it. 118 00:06:05,380 --> 00:06:07,440 So you have to stand behind it to test it. 119 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:12,140 And then gets blown a good 40 feet into a metal grate 120 00:06:12,140 --> 00:06:15,500 and is presumed to dead. Yeah, true to form. 121 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,800 Yeah. But they don't know where the bomb is. 122 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:20,900 So they have to use government science 123 00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:25,940 to take Castor Troy's face off and replace it with Sean Archer's. 124 00:06:26,780 --> 00:06:29,280 Also, a lot of needless. 125 00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:31,340 Well, explanation is to what they do. 126 00:06:31,340 --> 00:06:32,640 How their body types are going to. 127 00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:36,200 They remove Sean Archer's face and replace it with Castor Troy's. 128 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,900 Oh, yes, you're right. That that comes later. 129 00:06:38,900 --> 00:06:43,440 Yeah. And the most important part is then his face goes into a goo vat. 130 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:45,200 Yes, there is a goo vat. 131 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,080 And it floats pretty sweetly. 132 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:50,740 So after the goo vatting, 133 00:06:50,740 --> 00:06:53,040 Sean Archer has Castor Troy's face, 134 00:06:54,140 --> 00:06:57,780 Nick Cage and as Travolta is now Nick Cage, 135 00:06:58,100 --> 00:07:02,240 right, is sent to a supermax prison where the Geneva Convention does not exist. 136 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:06,440 We are told put into magnetic Robo boots. 137 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:10,040 Yep. Where he is put into Genpop and 138 00:07:10,900 --> 00:07:15,100 immediately fights a guy and meets Tom Jane with an awesome wig. 139 00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:18,060 Yeah, true. Meets back up with his brother 140 00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:21,440 and immediately finds out where the bomb's placed, calls his brother an idiot. 141 00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:23,940 And yeah, he really burns that bridge. 142 00:07:23,940 --> 00:07:26,860 Yeah. Before he has a chance to report anything. 143 00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,960 He's just like a fucking nerd and like thieves. 144 00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:32,780 All the while, Castor Troy, apparently having your face cut off 145 00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:35,960 is enough to like spike your adrenaline to kick you out of a coma. 146 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:36,980 Yeah, we'll come right up. 147 00:07:36,980 --> 00:07:40,380 Yeah. And then he kidnaps the scientist 148 00:07:40,380 --> 00:07:45,280 and the two FBI agents who know the truth have them swap faces. 149 00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:48,980 And for reasons we'll get into later, I'm assuming penises 150 00:07:50,980 --> 00:07:53,720 and goes about living Sean Archer's life, 151 00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:59,880 including but not limited to kicking his girlfriend's boyfriend's ass. 152 00:08:00,860 --> 00:08:03,780 Rightfully so. And sleeping with the daughter. 153 00:08:04,020 --> 00:08:05,660 Yes. Yeah. Yeah. 154 00:08:05,660 --> 00:08:08,260 So you ramble for a while, Nick. 155 00:08:08,260 --> 00:08:12,520 John Travolta playing now the Castor Troy character. 156 00:08:13,020 --> 00:08:17,880 He goes off and like he, you know, diffuses the bomb, becomes America's hero. 157 00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:23,380 He gets his face on a fucking Wheaties box and everybody is super thrilled about him. 158 00:08:23,380 --> 00:08:27,380 Meanwhile, Nicholas Cage playing Sean Archer 159 00:08:27,380 --> 00:08:30,280 is just kind of left to rot in this prison. 160 00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:31,880 He finds a way to escape. 161 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:36,340 It's a pretty, pretty big Hail Mary, but he does it. 162 00:08:36,340 --> 00:08:37,540 He gets out. 163 00:08:37,540 --> 00:08:41,980 He swims off to safety because it was on an oil rig. 164 00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:44,540 Oh, just off the coast of L.A. 165 00:08:44,540 --> 00:08:47,040 Yeah. Yeah. All those L.A. oil rigs. 166 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:53,540 And then once he gets back, like he starts goading Archer. 167 00:08:53,540 --> 00:08:54,240 I don't know. 168 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:59,440 They like getting a fucking gunfight, which turns into a boat fight. 169 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:02,240 And he jumps a boat off a boat. 170 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:03,740 There's a weaponized anchor at one point. 171 00:09:03,740 --> 00:09:05,280 Yeah. Weaponized anchor. 172 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:06,440 That was pretty good. 173 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:08,940 Boat crashes. They're on the sands. 174 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:13,040 Some ass just shoots Castor Troy and Tim. 175 00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:15,380 John Travolta gets his face back. 176 00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:19,840 And they adopt the kid of Castor Troy. 177 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:21,940 Oh, yeah, that's not that Castor Troy has a son. 178 00:09:22,340 --> 00:09:24,940 That's about the same age as Archer's son would have been. 179 00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:26,840 Yeah, it's weird. He gets all emotional. 180 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,340 He's like, we're going to we're going to keep this boy. 181 00:09:29,580 --> 00:09:32,180 And he just springs it on his wife and daughter. 182 00:09:32,540 --> 00:09:35,080 It's like, this is the replacement for Michael. 183 00:09:35,740 --> 00:09:37,240 Yeah. Brings the boy home. 184 00:09:37,240 --> 00:09:38,680 Says, can we keep him? 185 00:09:38,680 --> 00:09:42,240 Tells the daughter, show him his new room, then ask his wife, is this OK? 186 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,640 Yeah. Oh, all the while, everybody is doing 187 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:50,180 the most ridiculous, stupid, forced, like some family 188 00:09:50,740 --> 00:09:52,580 thing of like touching each other's faces. 189 00:09:52,580 --> 00:09:54,540 Yes. I want to get into that because that was the weirdest thing. 190 00:09:54,540 --> 00:09:57,040 What is with that? They're I don't know. 191 00:09:57,340 --> 00:10:01,080 Archer has this thing with his family where to show love and affection, 192 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:03,700 he just like puts his hand on their face and then just like 193 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:05,540 rakes it down their face. 194 00:10:05,540 --> 00:10:08,940 Yeah, it's exactly the thing you do to somebody like a drunk person. 195 00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:13,040 Oh, it's what a drunk person does when they're just saying like, go to sleep, bitch. 196 00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:14,960 Like, no, go to sleep. 197 00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:17,300 Yeah, you're drunk. Go to sleep, bitch. 198 00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:19,800 I'm thinking Archer and his wife's 199 00:10:20,500 --> 00:10:23,740 marital problems aren't solely about their dead son. 200 00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:27,440 I mean, no, probably not. 201 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:30,300 Joan Allen looks like a real, real treat. 202 00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:33,540 She's the one who plays Archer's wife, if I remember right. 203 00:10:33,560 --> 00:10:34,800 Yes. Yeah. 204 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:38,940 Gina Gershon plays Castor Troy's maybe girlfriend, 205 00:10:38,940 --> 00:10:41,840 but mother of his child that he may or may not know about. 206 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:43,800 I don't even know that name. 207 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:46,440 Oh, Danny Masterson's in this thing. Oh, yes. 208 00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:51,580 Plain, a very aggressive 209 00:10:51,980 --> 00:10:53,900 date for the daughter character. 210 00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:56,100 Yeah. And overly aggressive. 211 00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:59,800 Yeah. I mean, it just seems like unfortunate. 212 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:01,800 Yeah. Fuck that. Well, yeah. 213 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:03,880 Yeah. I mean, obviously fuck that guy. 214 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,980 But I don't know, is his case is still like ongoing. 215 00:11:06,980 --> 00:11:08,980 So I'm not going to like defame him. 216 00:11:08,980 --> 00:11:09,880 We just need to. 217 00:11:09,880 --> 00:11:12,700 We just got through the Johnny Depp defamation case. 218 00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:15,480 I don't need the Danny Masterson V. 219 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:18,340 Fuck. Hey, that is my last name out. 220 00:11:18,340 --> 00:11:22,740 We we do need that for her so we can get this rated higher on Apple. 221 00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:26,240 Did you guys see that depth was actually tied to this originally? 222 00:11:26,340 --> 00:11:28,700 And then, oh, yeah, script and was like, nah. 223 00:11:29,540 --> 00:11:33,140 Well, this movie was originally supposed to cast Stallone and Schwarzenegger. 224 00:11:33,900 --> 00:11:35,680 That would have been amazing. 225 00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:39,440 Yeah, because this was what originally slated for like early 90s, 226 00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:41,380 like 91, I think. 227 00:11:41,380 --> 00:11:44,840 And both those guys were like top of the game at the time. 228 00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:48,140 You could have entirely cut the scene explaining the body 229 00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:50,980 ship shape shifting aspects if you had those guys. 230 00:11:50,980 --> 00:11:52,440 Yeah. Yeah, pretty much. 231 00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:53,300 Yeah. So that's the thing. 232 00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:56,940 They removed all scars, liposuction. 233 00:11:56,940 --> 00:11:59,200 They did the whole thing to give them the same body types, 234 00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:03,000 including giving Sean Archer 235 00:12:03,340 --> 00:12:05,380 Casper Troye's tattoos. 236 00:12:05,380 --> 00:12:07,780 Yeah. And presumably belly button ring. 237 00:12:07,780 --> 00:12:09,520 Of course. Yeah. 238 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,520 That man definitely has a belly button ring. 239 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:15,280 John Woo's probably got like a little dove bangle inside of it. 240 00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:18,280 There are doves in a church where there is a shootout. 241 00:12:18,580 --> 00:12:21,360 Yeah, there's a lot of church action, like in the beginning, 242 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:24,320 Casper Troye is dressed up like a priest and he's going around 243 00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,780 molesting choir ladies. 244 00:12:25,780 --> 00:12:27,780 And I mean, it happened. 245 00:12:27,780 --> 00:12:31,560 Then he made that one like wild eyed face that everybody's seen on the Internet. 246 00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:33,860 That's the that's the meme I've been talking about. 247 00:12:33,860 --> 00:12:35,020 Yeah, that's a good one. 248 00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:39,060 Biggest problem I always have with this film is how checked out 249 00:12:39,060 --> 00:12:42,620 is Sean Archer's wife because she hasn't slept with her husband in months. 250 00:12:43,020 --> 00:12:46,760 And the first time they do, I'm assuming she's seen his penis in those months 251 00:12:47,260 --> 00:12:51,460 because I I mean, I've done my research on the Internet. 252 00:12:51,460 --> 00:12:53,980 And you know, there's differences. 253 00:12:54,420 --> 00:12:57,260 Then these don't come prepackaged. 254 00:12:57,480 --> 00:13:01,460 Oh, I thought you were specifically Googling these two actors penises. 255 00:13:01,460 --> 00:13:04,580 What I do and what I do in private mode is none of your business. 256 00:13:04,580 --> 00:13:06,080 It's true. 257 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:08,920 You're discounting the fact that the government was behind this 258 00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,480 and they definitely have penis swap technology. 259 00:13:11,940 --> 00:13:15,440 I mean, that's what this technology was initially invented for, I'm sure. 260 00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:19,220 I mean, so at the end, they could get the space and body back. 261 00:13:19,220 --> 00:13:22,780 I would argue to like maybe not put the pounds back on. 262 00:13:23,180 --> 00:13:28,780 Oh, yeah, sure. I mean, they didn't put his stupid little gunshot scar on there 263 00:13:28,780 --> 00:13:32,320 because he didn't need it because he was adopting the child of the man 264 00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:34,120 who killed his child. 265 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:36,520 That he then went and killed. Yeah. 266 00:13:36,780 --> 00:13:39,080 See, you're hung up on the penis thing. 267 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:41,340 I'm just struck by this. 268 00:13:41,340 --> 00:13:44,680 Like, why didn't they just cut that? 269 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:46,820 I mean, it's it's so bad. 270 00:13:46,820 --> 00:13:50,920 It literally just comes in as a sentence at the end of Wikipedia's article on this. 271 00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:55,080 It's like, and then they adopt the kid fulfilling his promise to Sasha. 272 00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:56,920 It's like, what? 273 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,080 Why is that so necessary? 274 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:04,120 Because now he can move on from his vendetta. 275 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:05,980 Yeah, I guess. Also. 276 00:14:05,980 --> 00:14:07,280 OK, here's my question. 277 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,940 If the Geneva Geneva Convention isn't a thing in that supermax prison, 278 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,980 I not just torture the brother like they make a whole point about how they have 279 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:15,980 to get it out of him this way. 280 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,820 I'm like, you know, car. 281 00:14:17,820 --> 00:14:21,020 They use electroshock in there. 282 00:14:21,020 --> 00:14:27,540 Yeah. I mean, it still would violate his constitutional rights. 283 00:14:27,540 --> 00:14:29,700 But the forced lobotomies don't. 284 00:14:30,540 --> 00:14:33,480 Yeah. Obviously. 285 00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:36,700 OK, so the breakout scene. 286 00:14:36,700 --> 00:14:39,000 OK, yeah. Sean Archer as Castor Troy. 287 00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:40,840 Yeah. Getting more confusing. 288 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:42,780 Aren't you as Troy Archer as Troy. 289 00:14:42,780 --> 00:14:45,140 He makes a point of not killing any of the guards 290 00:14:45,140 --> 00:14:46,180 because they're just doing their job. 291 00:14:46,180 --> 00:14:49,300 And the guy breaks out with he stops from shooting a guard in the face. 292 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:50,840 But he's more than OK 293 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:55,580 than shooting a bottle of acid that blows up like horribly scarring three guards. 294 00:14:55,580 --> 00:14:59,680 Yeah. Well, I mean, prison guards, you can presume, 295 00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:03,080 are not completely without shittiness. 296 00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:06,140 I mean, he did promise he was going to get that one guard fired when he got out. 297 00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:10,780 Look, I wasn't given a toothbrush one time on an overnight and I asked for it. 298 00:15:10,780 --> 00:15:12,480 And they're like, fuck you. 299 00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:14,080 You don't get a hygiene pack. 300 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,580 And I'm like, that seems really rude. 301 00:15:16,580 --> 00:15:21,420 Like, I just want to brush my teeth like a civilized person in jail. 302 00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:22,580 And you won't let me. 303 00:15:22,580 --> 00:15:24,420 It's fucked, bro. 304 00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:26,560 We said we're going to talk. 305 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:30,380 What's your favorite line for Nick Cage line from this film? 306 00:15:30,580 --> 00:15:33,260 Since we are here mostly to talk about Nick Cage, 307 00:15:33,980 --> 00:15:35,560 is it the peach line? 308 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:36,720 Is it something I tell? 309 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:42,360 I think it's suck my tongue because it's like who who the fuck is just like suck 310 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:45,180 my tongue and he says it was such authority. 311 00:15:45,180 --> 00:15:46,320 You know, it's a thing he does. 312 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:47,720 And it comes up again later. 313 00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:51,580 Sasha mentions it about sucking his tongue. 314 00:15:51,580 --> 00:15:53,180 All the time. It's like, that's fucking weird. 315 00:15:53,180 --> 00:15:58,180 And then like when the FBI agent undercover on the flight actually does it. 316 00:15:58,180 --> 00:16:02,920 Yeah. By the way, there was an FBI agent undercover on the flight where 317 00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:07,880 where Archer again pins him down before the karate kick into the console 318 00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:10,180 with the turbine that knocks him unconscious. 319 00:16:10,180 --> 00:16:14,260 But for all of that, there was an FBI agent undercover on the flight 320 00:16:14,260 --> 00:16:19,260 as a flight attendant, and she sucks on his tongue like aggressively. 321 00:16:19,260 --> 00:16:22,580 Like the way you only do in the 90s. 322 00:16:22,580 --> 00:16:25,380 Oh, 90s sexuality. Yeah. 323 00:16:25,380 --> 00:16:31,060 It was like his entire tongue just out of his mouth, wet. 324 00:16:31,060 --> 00:16:34,580 And she just takes it all without even a slurp. 325 00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:36,580 She just wasn't the cage ask. 326 00:16:36,580 --> 00:16:38,580 I think it's in his writer. 327 00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:44,080 It's really just there to see if people read. 328 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:47,580 And John Wu is the only one who read it. 329 00:16:47,580 --> 00:16:52,580 Apparently, my suck my tongue. 330 00:16:52,580 --> 00:16:54,580 I don't know. 331 00:16:54,580 --> 00:17:00,580 The line that just I keep thinking about is when he's on drugs after escaping prison 332 00:17:00,580 --> 00:17:05,580 and he excuses himself to the little boys, we room. 333 00:17:05,580 --> 00:17:07,580 Yeah, that had to be ad-libbed. 334 00:17:07,580 --> 00:17:12,580 I can't imagine a Hollywood writer being like little boys, we room. 335 00:17:12,580 --> 00:17:14,580 That'll get me the Oscar. 336 00:17:14,580 --> 00:17:18,580 Can you imagine like Sylvester Stallone saying that? 337 00:17:18,580 --> 00:17:20,580 That's all I think about now. 338 00:17:20,580 --> 00:17:21,580 Yeah. 339 00:17:21,580 --> 00:17:23,580 I can't do a Stallone. 340 00:17:23,580 --> 00:17:27,580 I'm not going to do it because I don't want to get hit with like defamation. 341 00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:29,580 I don't know how defamation works into this. 342 00:17:29,580 --> 00:17:31,580 I probably say something real stupid. 343 00:17:31,580 --> 00:17:33,580 I'd be more concerned about actually getting hit by Stallone. 344 00:17:33,580 --> 00:17:38,580 I mean, I think that'd be good for both of us to get hit by Stallone. 345 00:17:38,580 --> 00:17:40,580 Yeah. I mean, it'd be a story. 346 00:17:40,580 --> 00:17:42,580 It would be pretty good. 347 00:17:42,580 --> 00:17:45,580 It elevates one career at least. 348 00:17:45,580 --> 00:17:49,580 Not mine because I'll be on disability for a while. 349 00:17:49,580 --> 00:17:51,580 I think I'll be on hold. 350 00:17:51,580 --> 00:17:53,580 Oh, I'm an illustrator. 351 00:17:53,580 --> 00:17:56,580 So I probably just make my art more interesting. 352 00:17:56,580 --> 00:17:58,580 The pain that I could draw upon. 353 00:17:58,580 --> 00:17:59,580 I guess. 354 00:17:59,580 --> 00:18:06,580 I mean, if you followed any of that plot with our just absurd ADD. 355 00:18:06,580 --> 00:18:07,580 We will. 356 00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:11,580 Next episode, we'll maybe write down what we'll be doing. 357 00:18:11,580 --> 00:18:14,580 Maybe write down the recaps and read them. 358 00:18:14,580 --> 00:18:17,580 We won't. 359 00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:18,580 Yeah. 360 00:18:18,580 --> 00:18:20,580 So that's I like the off the cuff. 361 00:18:20,580 --> 00:18:22,580 I think it's a little bit more authentic. 362 00:18:22,580 --> 00:18:24,580 OK, it's dumb, but I like it. 363 00:18:24,580 --> 00:18:28,580 So that's fine. It actually involves less of me and I'm OK with that. 364 00:18:28,580 --> 00:18:32,580 So according to IMDB trivia, not that I don't put my all into this podcast. 365 00:18:32,580 --> 00:18:34,580 I've really dedicated myself to it. 366 00:18:34,580 --> 00:18:37,580 I mean, you dedicate yourself to watching 64 Nicolas Cage films. 367 00:18:37,580 --> 00:18:41,580 Yeah, and I stretch in between them. So it's cool. 368 00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:46,580 According to IMDB trivia, Nicholas Cage and John Travolta spent two weeks together 369 00:18:46,580 --> 00:18:54,580 trying to learn each other's mannerisms and discuss lines that they could replicate of each other's to cross the characters. 370 00:18:54,580 --> 00:18:56,580 What are the odds that they kissed during that time? 371 00:18:56,580 --> 00:18:58,580 Oh, 100 percent. That's the first thing they did. 372 00:18:58,580 --> 00:19:06,580 Well, I would have to learn how to do the suck my tongue thing because, you know, he went home and did that to Eve. 373 00:19:06,580 --> 00:19:10,580 He's just like, baby, suck my tongue. 374 00:19:10,580 --> 00:19:12,580 I don't know what John Travolta sounds like. 375 00:19:12,580 --> 00:19:15,580 Apparently, Elvis, you're not far off. 376 00:19:15,580 --> 00:19:17,580 Don't sue me, Elvis. I know you're out there. 377 00:19:17,580 --> 00:19:22,580 Apparently, John Travolta was also a little butthurt about the ridiculous chin line. 378 00:19:22,580 --> 00:19:25,580 That was a really good one. 379 00:19:25,580 --> 00:19:28,580 And making him like diss himself. That's just funny. 380 00:19:28,580 --> 00:19:33,580 I do want to say, though, the action in this film is peak woo. 381 00:19:33,580 --> 00:19:34,580 Oh, yeah, that's great. 382 00:19:34,580 --> 00:19:37,580 You can shoot a gun with two feet planted on the floor. 383 00:19:37,580 --> 00:19:42,580 Everyone is constantly diving over everything while shooting and missing. 384 00:19:42,580 --> 00:19:50,580 Yeah. And fully automatic pistols, fully automatic pistols with like 30 round magazines just unloading on beaches. 385 00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:56,580 They're, I will say, probably the best like cinematography. 386 00:19:56,580 --> 00:20:04,580 That's a word when they meet for the first time in the room of mirrors, because there's just a room with just mirrors. 387 00:20:04,580 --> 00:20:14,580 They're on either side of it and they turn to shoot the other person through the mirror, but they see the reflection of their most hated enemy, who is them. 388 00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:21,580 I thought that was pretty cool. So the director of photography, Oliver Wood, is his name. 389 00:20:21,580 --> 00:20:26,580 He notably also made Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. Nice. Yeah. 390 00:20:26,580 --> 00:20:33,580 Another deep, powerful visual movie. Yes. And most recently, Morbius. 391 00:20:33,580 --> 00:20:42,580 Oh, new game, Six Degrees of Morbius. So, yes, this is a fun romp. 392 00:20:42,580 --> 00:20:49,580 That's a great movie. It's literally got everything. Like, it's got everything. 393 00:20:49,580 --> 00:20:58,580 I would argue, and this might be a trend for a lot of these films, that you could probably skip the first 40 minutes of it and still get just as much out of it. 394 00:20:58,580 --> 00:21:03,580 This thing is this movie is very weighted towards the back half when they actually get to interact. 395 00:21:03,580 --> 00:21:13,580 That's true. It's a slow start. Like, you get your popcorn ready and maybe have a beer in the first half hour and then it gets going. 396 00:21:13,580 --> 00:21:21,580 Then then the wild ride starts. But anyway, I think it's fair to say that, yes, I like this movie. I'm going to say, yeah, I enjoy it. 397 00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:25,580 Whether it's better than Jiu Jitsu or not, I mean, we'll just have to hang in there and find out. 398 00:21:25,580 --> 00:21:33,580 But who doesn't like Face Off? Great movie. Full range of acting from Nicolas Cage. 399 00:21:33,580 --> 00:21:39,580 You get to see him like just a maniac. You get to see him like we do get some emotional crying. We get everything. 400 00:21:39,580 --> 00:21:46,580 It's it's pretty great. It's got fucking hot ass golden handguns. I forgot about the gold handguns. 401 00:21:46,580 --> 00:21:56,580 Yeah, just he's so unhinged in this and it's so good. Yeah. Great. Great movie. Could have been better if he kept the mustache. 402 00:21:56,580 --> 00:22:05,580 Yes. So ultimately, it is also worth noting that this movie was nominated for an Oscar for sound design. 403 00:22:05,580 --> 00:22:14,580 We're right in it, but it lost to Titanic. Titanic was really on a run that year, too, so I'm not surprised. Yeah, I had a good show. 404 00:22:14,580 --> 00:22:22,580 Anyway, next film is Jiu Jitsu from 2020. And I think we're all really excited to talk about this one. 405 00:22:22,580 --> 00:22:28,580 It's the one that kind of stole our hearts. Looking around the room shockingly. 406 00:22:28,580 --> 00:22:36,580 You know what? I loved this film for all the wrong reasons. The first time I watched it, I hated it. 407 00:22:36,580 --> 00:22:41,580 The second time I watched it, I started to understand it. 408 00:22:41,580 --> 00:22:50,580 And this is where like I went full Stockholm syndrome because the third and fourth times I've watched this movie, I found it just actually charmingly bad. 409 00:22:50,580 --> 00:22:59,580 Yeah, like the script kind of it's got. I mean, it's so high school. I don't know. Like it's OK. 410 00:22:59,580 --> 00:23:04,580 I can sum this one up much quicker than we did face off. Please. 411 00:23:04,580 --> 00:23:13,580 The Predator meets Mortal Kombat. Every six years, a comet flies over the earth, bringing with it a strange alien fighter 412 00:23:13,580 --> 00:23:24,580 who apparently and belong long ago came to Earth and taught humanity Jiu Jitsu so he could come fight six, nine fighters every six years. 413 00:23:24,580 --> 00:23:29,580 Every six years, he shows up six of the nines. Nice. 414 00:23:29,580 --> 00:23:35,580 Kills nine fighters. I'm assuming teenagers with attitude, considering the production value of this. 415 00:23:35,580 --> 00:23:42,580 And then fucks off back to his space car and does it six years later. 416 00:23:42,580 --> 00:23:45,580 Yeah, this guy's got a weird edge that he has to scratch. 417 00:23:45,580 --> 00:23:52,580 The caveat being if if one of the fighters refuses to fight, he can murder the world. 418 00:23:52,580 --> 00:23:58,580 Yeah. And that's only true unless it's not, which we can get into. 419 00:23:58,580 --> 00:24:07,580 So I was struck by how bad this movie is and also really enjoyed some of the reviews. I noted two of them in particular. 420 00:24:07,580 --> 00:24:11,580 Nice. Jiu Jitsu is a movie with no Jiu Jitsu. 421 00:24:11,580 --> 00:24:15,580 Yep. And I watched this movie to the end to see if it got better. 422 00:24:15,580 --> 00:24:23,580 It didn't. I will say you can see where they spent their money and where they definitely didn't. 423 00:24:23,580 --> 00:24:28,580 I can tell you this. Their budget was 25 million and five million of it was Nicholas Cage. 424 00:24:28,580 --> 00:24:34,580 Which is for three days of work. Well, OK. 425 00:24:34,580 --> 00:24:41,580 So and you can definitely tell when it's not Nicholas Cage because of the bad wig on the on the body that is definitely not Nick Cage's. 426 00:24:41,580 --> 00:24:48,580 Yeah, he did do 80 percent of his own stunts and he does do Brazilian Jiu Jitsu like he does know that. 427 00:24:48,580 --> 00:24:54,580 So that was pretty interesting. Yeah, I will say goes full cage from the get go. 428 00:24:54,580 --> 00:25:00,580 Not my favorite line, but an amazing line from this film is get off my piano. Oh, yeah. 429 00:25:00,580 --> 00:25:05,580 Or the that's my favorite chair. I thought you'd like it. 430 00:25:05,580 --> 00:25:17,580 So either way, the movie starts off with the unnamed currently unnamed protagonist running through a field in a sick ass mesh sleeveless jacket being shot at. 431 00:25:17,580 --> 00:25:25,580 Yeah, it's like a brawler with a cape on it. Yes. Being shot at with off brand predator predator blades. 432 00:25:25,580 --> 00:25:52,580 Yeah, just the jungle that are just being shot from every angle and none of them are rendered in the current lighting until our hero jumps off a cliff into the ocean where he is later saved by Nicholas Cage and an old fisherman stitched up by the fisherman's wife and then dropped off at a nearby military installation where we are introduced to a bunch of characters we will never see again. 433 00:25:52,580 --> 00:26:00,580 Yeah. Did you notice when he was running through the forest and then like jumped off that thing like he's running around. 434 00:26:00,580 --> 00:26:08,580 He's got his bralette and his cape and he's like, I don't know, doing ninja runs. And then he goes through a bush and jumps off the cape. 435 00:26:08,580 --> 00:26:16,580 Yeah, and then it's all gone. It's like it just got ripped off of him. But it was just the reverse of plot armor. 436 00:26:16,580 --> 00:26:26,580 This movie sucks. So we're going to take away your things. The next important character we're introduced to. 437 00:26:26,580 --> 00:26:32,580 I use important with a lot of sarcasm is crab man from Earl. Yeah. 438 00:26:32,580 --> 00:26:49,580 Darnel, whose name I did look up for this and have immediately forgotten. It's Eddie Steeples. Eddie Steeples, who is hamming it up in this role. He is apparently the interpreter to speak with the locals. 439 00:26:49,580 --> 00:26:58,580 The movie takes place in Burma. Oh, I thought it was Myanmar. Is it Myanmar? That's literally a quote from the movie. That's right. 440 00:26:58,580 --> 00:27:06,580 Which is the same place also, by the way. That's the same place, isn't it? Yeah. Yes. So my dumb self had to look that up. 441 00:27:06,580 --> 00:27:12,580 I was like, why do they say that? And I was like, oh, because Myanmar is well, Burma is Myanmar. 442 00:27:12,580 --> 00:27:20,580 Either way, it's a plot point that he doesn't speak the language that is never used except for comic relief when he shows up in the third act mysteriously. 443 00:27:20,580 --> 00:27:28,580 Right. Well, they don't interact with people outside of military people and ninjas and ninjas. 444 00:27:28,580 --> 00:27:37,580 So our hero is interrogated by a Ronda Rousey type and given truth serum. 445 00:27:37,580 --> 00:27:43,580 But he doesn't remember anything except he has a weird Geiger counter thing that he remembers what it does, but doesn't remember anything else. 446 00:27:43,580 --> 00:27:49,580 I don't think he even remembers what it does. He just remembers that it's his. Well, he said it tracks radiation. 447 00:27:49,580 --> 00:27:55,580 Oh, did he? Yeah. Then he beats up a bunch of people to escape, but then gets. Oh, man. 448 00:27:55,580 --> 00:28:02,580 Can we talk about that horrible? Are we on the hardcore Henry scene? No, that's where we're about to get to. 449 00:28:02,580 --> 00:28:14,580 Then another teenager with attitude who shows up in another sick ass mesh top walks onto the base and proceeds to just kick everyone's ass. 450 00:28:14,580 --> 00:28:19,580 Yeah. Soldiers with guns. He just punches them and they're like, OK, well, obviously we can't shoot him. 451 00:28:19,580 --> 00:28:24,580 And there's a lot of him like jumping over walls. And then in the background, there's just a large explosion. 452 00:28:24,580 --> 00:28:31,580 Then he comes like kicking his way through a door and kicking more ass up to the point where he gets to the hero. 453 00:28:31,580 --> 00:28:37,580 They do a sick ass like predator style arm grab and get the fuck out of there. 454 00:28:37,580 --> 00:28:45,580 Where we go to the hardcore Henry ask first person chase sequence where you were seen through the main characters chest because it's real low. 455 00:28:45,580 --> 00:28:48,580 Yeah, it's definitely the belly button cam. 456 00:28:48,580 --> 00:28:53,580 And it's not terrible until he gets hit and gets knocked to the ground. 457 00:28:53,580 --> 00:28:58,580 And then we're in a third person view from where he was laying on the ground of him getting up, kicking ass. 458 00:28:58,580 --> 00:29:02,580 And then he gets knocked back into where the camera is. And then we're suddenly back in first person mode. 459 00:29:02,580 --> 00:29:06,580 So it goes first to second to first to second. Yeah. Very odd. 460 00:29:06,580 --> 00:29:12,580 A fun game during this part of the movie is seeing if you can catch all the crash pads. 461 00:29:12,580 --> 00:29:17,580 Yes, you can see them all. Yeah. So, yes, it's not that hard of a game. 462 00:29:17,580 --> 00:29:21,580 All visible under. Hey, I liked the CG bullet holes that would appear in walls occasionally. 463 00:29:21,580 --> 00:29:24,580 Yeah. Oh, they were real good. They look like stickers. 464 00:29:24,580 --> 00:29:28,580 Yeah. Like I said, you can definitely see where the money wasn't spent on this film. 465 00:29:28,580 --> 00:29:35,580 Yeah. And where it didn't need to be spent, because there's a lot of CG blood shooting out of people. 466 00:29:35,580 --> 00:29:44,580 Yeah, but it matches. I mean, there's a general aesthetic to all of the special effects on it that just tie together. 467 00:29:44,580 --> 00:29:49,580 And if they didn't do the blood that way, it would lose that fake comic book look. 468 00:29:49,580 --> 00:29:56,580 Oh, that's another thing. All the scenes are transitioned through with bad Photoshop filter comic book panels. 469 00:29:56,580 --> 00:30:00,580 Yeah. Not like a classic wipe or anything. No. 470 00:30:00,580 --> 00:30:06,580 It just goes, you know, bad filter and then transition right into a scene. 471 00:30:06,580 --> 00:30:16,580 Well, either way. So or fade our hero and his little buddy escape to a field where they meet the rest of the Power Rangers. 472 00:30:16,580 --> 00:30:20,580 Yeah, they all pop up out of the grass and we are taught. 473 00:30:20,580 --> 00:30:23,580 We are told the main character name. It's Jake. 474 00:30:23,580 --> 00:30:31,580 And any time anyone refers to Jake, they start their sentence with Jake and then their sentence with Jake. 475 00:30:31,580 --> 00:30:34,580 Jake, where have you been, Jake? 476 00:30:34,580 --> 00:30:39,580 Jake doesn't remember who any of these people are, Jake, because of his amnesia. 477 00:30:39,580 --> 00:30:44,580 But then he's obviously got a girlfriend in the crowd because she gets real sweet on him right away. 478 00:30:44,580 --> 00:30:49,580 Oh, yeah. Juju Chan. Yeah. Playing Carmen. The character's name is Carmen. 479 00:30:49,580 --> 00:30:53,580 Also, yeah. What is Frank Grillo doing in this film? I don't know. 480 00:30:53,580 --> 00:30:59,580 Obviously, just sliding. I mean, the MCU can't save everybody's career, I guess. 481 00:30:59,580 --> 00:31:03,580 I suppose not. But I mean, Nicolas Cage is in it. 482 00:31:03,580 --> 00:31:08,580 And if you told me that I could be in a movie with Nicolas Cage, I'd do it. OK, fair. 483 00:31:08,580 --> 00:31:12,580 So I don't think Frank Grillo is above that. No, no. 484 00:31:12,580 --> 00:31:16,580 We're on pretty much the same same level, Frank and I. 485 00:31:16,580 --> 00:31:23,580 So all the Power Rangers have their own mesh tops and unique weapons to their fighting style. 486 00:31:23,580 --> 00:31:25,580 Yeah, pretty unique. 487 00:31:25,580 --> 00:31:30,580 The little guy who saves Jake has the best weapons of all pipes. 488 00:31:30,580 --> 00:31:34,580 Yeah, they're just PVC tonfa. Yeah. 489 00:31:34,580 --> 00:31:39,580 You could make each one out of like six dollars worth of materials from Home Depot. 490 00:31:39,580 --> 00:31:41,580 Like everyone else has in an afternoon. 491 00:31:41,580 --> 00:31:46,580 Everyone else has like an actual weapon like the big the big guy has a club. 492 00:31:46,580 --> 00:31:50,580 The guy with the staff is really just kind of swinging around a piece of conduit. 493 00:31:50,580 --> 00:31:52,580 It's hollow. You can see the end of it. 494 00:31:52,580 --> 00:31:55,580 Yeah, but he pulls them apart and there's blades in there. 495 00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:58,580 I'm just saying, like, those were definitely PVC pipes. 496 00:31:58,580 --> 00:32:02,580 Yeah, the tonfa were definitely PVC pipes. They were just bad. 497 00:32:02,580 --> 00:32:05,580 I mean, it was it was a choice, clearly. 498 00:32:05,580 --> 00:32:11,580 So the army shows up, they fight the army, Jake is recaptured by the army 499 00:32:11,580 --> 00:32:16,580 only to go out with the army to track the actual villain of the piece, Brax. 500 00:32:16,580 --> 00:32:18,580 Yeah, Brax is the alien dude. Yeah. 501 00:32:18,580 --> 00:32:23,580 Yeah, that's that's how this movie the movie starts off with bad predator 502 00:32:23,580 --> 00:32:26,580 stealth camo. 503 00:32:26,580 --> 00:32:30,580 And then we're about 25 minutes into it again before they remind you that there's an alien. 504 00:32:30,580 --> 00:32:33,580 Just we could do this weird amnesia storyline. 505 00:32:33,580 --> 00:32:36,580 So they go out into the jungle. 506 00:32:36,580 --> 00:32:41,580 They're all immediately taken down by predator blades and Jake escapes again 507 00:32:41,580 --> 00:32:43,580 to meet up with his party. 508 00:32:43,580 --> 00:32:46,580 Oh, no, because then he meets up with Nick. 509 00:32:46,580 --> 00:32:48,580 He falls in and Nick Cage is underground. 510 00:32:48,580 --> 00:32:55,580 Yeah. It is what cage cave, the cage cave where they have a bit of a dust up 511 00:32:55,580 --> 00:32:58,580 for whatever reason. Yeah. For reasons. 512 00:32:58,580 --> 00:33:01,580 I mean, Nick Cage obviously recognized him. 513 00:33:01,580 --> 00:33:04,580 He was kind of goading him about things. Yeah. 514 00:33:04,580 --> 00:33:08,580 Kind of giving him a hard time getting him to jump up on his piano to dodge fights. 515 00:33:08,580 --> 00:33:10,580 So get off my piano. Yeah. 516 00:33:10,580 --> 00:33:13,580 Pushing him in a chair. His favorite chair. 517 00:33:13,580 --> 00:33:16,580 Uh huh. He thought he'd like it. 518 00:33:16,580 --> 00:33:19,580 Watch the film. You'll think this is hilarious. 519 00:33:19,580 --> 00:33:21,580 You won't think it's hilarious. You'll think we're idiots. 520 00:33:21,580 --> 00:33:24,580 But I mean, they don't need to watch the film to think we're idiots. 521 00:33:24,580 --> 00:33:26,580 They should still watch the film. Agreed. 522 00:33:26,580 --> 00:33:28,580 I thoroughly enjoy it. 523 00:33:28,580 --> 00:33:32,580 I enjoyed it the first time too. I don't know that I did. 524 00:33:32,580 --> 00:33:35,580 Turned my brain off. They they have a dust up. 525 00:33:35,580 --> 00:33:37,580 The rest of the Power Rangers show up. 526 00:33:37,580 --> 00:33:40,580 Nicolas Cage, whose name is Wiley. Yeah. 527 00:33:40,580 --> 00:33:42,580 I feel like that needs to be mentioned. 528 00:33:42,580 --> 00:33:45,580 He's got like sweet shoulder length hair and a bandana. Yes. 529 00:33:45,580 --> 00:33:52,580 He looks like he just got off like an easy rider fan convention. 530 00:33:52,580 --> 00:33:56,580 According to IMDB, the character depiction was based on Willie Nelson. 531 00:33:56,580 --> 00:34:00,580 Okay. That's reasonable. 532 00:34:00,580 --> 00:34:02,580 Or Wiley Nelson. 533 00:34:02,580 --> 00:34:04,580 Why wouldn't you just call him Willie then? 534 00:34:04,580 --> 00:34:06,580 Because Wiley. Wiley. 535 00:34:06,580 --> 00:34:09,580 I'm guessing as in Coyote. 536 00:34:09,580 --> 00:34:13,580 No, Wiley because he's tricksy. This is true. 537 00:34:13,580 --> 00:34:16,580 So they fight. There's a piano, there's a chair. 538 00:34:16,580 --> 00:34:18,580 We're idiots. And then the movie goes on. 539 00:34:18,580 --> 00:34:22,580 Then we get to get back to the actual plot armor, the mesh clothing, 540 00:34:22,580 --> 00:34:25,580 which makes them, as long as they cover their body with it, 541 00:34:25,580 --> 00:34:28,580 completely invisible to Brax, unless it doesn't. 542 00:34:28,580 --> 00:34:33,580 Well, and it only works if you have your exposed arms and face. 543 00:34:33,580 --> 00:34:38,580 Yeah, they say cover your whole body with it and you won't be seen. 544 00:34:38,580 --> 00:34:41,580 But it literally just hangs down their backs and they put the hood 545 00:34:41,580 --> 00:34:43,580 just up to their hairline. 546 00:34:43,580 --> 00:34:46,580 Yeah, because they're still paid to see these actors. 547 00:34:46,580 --> 00:34:48,580 No sleeves on any of these things. Yeah. 548 00:34:48,580 --> 00:34:52,580 So Brax should just be seen like some arms walking around. 549 00:34:52,580 --> 00:34:55,580 Yeah, just so they don't be able to see them from behind. Yes. 550 00:34:55,580 --> 00:34:59,580 And the plot armor works great because we do see through Brax's point of view, 551 00:34:59,580 --> 00:35:04,580 which is low budget Predator vision, them walking through the jungle. 552 00:35:04,580 --> 00:35:06,580 Yeah. Perfectly fine. 553 00:35:06,580 --> 00:35:09,580 Until he gets into their first fight with the guy with the staff, 554 00:35:09,580 --> 00:35:11,580 which Brax doesn't see him. 555 00:35:11,580 --> 00:35:14,580 And this guy is the biggest arms out of all of them that are fully exposed. 556 00:35:14,580 --> 00:35:17,580 Doesn't see him until the guy like pulls off his hood. 557 00:35:17,580 --> 00:35:18,580 Yeah. Yeah. 558 00:35:18,580 --> 00:35:23,580 So he's pulling off the hood exposed his entire body when they were face to face. 559 00:35:23,580 --> 00:35:27,580 So and before any of you complain that why don't they just all beat up Brax at once? 560 00:35:27,580 --> 00:35:30,580 Apparently, they can't for reasons that are never explained. 561 00:35:30,580 --> 00:35:33,580 Yeah. They have to fight and die one on one. 562 00:35:33,580 --> 00:35:37,580 Except for the times when they fight as duos and die as duos. Yes. 563 00:35:37,580 --> 00:35:40,580 And sometimes a trio. Yeah. 564 00:35:40,580 --> 00:35:42,580 So it doesn't matter. 565 00:35:42,580 --> 00:35:45,580 The rules are made up and they don't matter. Yeah. 566 00:35:45,580 --> 00:35:48,580 So Brax starts taking them out one by one. 567 00:35:48,580 --> 00:35:53,580 Oh, before that, though, when they were telling Jake the plan, 568 00:35:53,580 --> 00:35:55,580 Jake questions the plan. 569 00:35:55,580 --> 00:35:57,580 Jake is told it was his plan. 570 00:35:57,580 --> 00:36:00,580 And then everybody gives him shit. Yeah. 571 00:36:00,580 --> 00:36:03,580 But it was your blood. How do you forget your plan? 572 00:36:03,580 --> 00:36:05,580 Is your plan. Don't make him feel bad. 573 00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:07,580 You're confusing him about his plan. 574 00:36:07,580 --> 00:36:10,580 Forgetting that he has amnesia. Yeah. 575 00:36:10,580 --> 00:36:13,580 Like an insensitive. 576 00:36:13,580 --> 00:36:16,580 I'm glad they all die. Yeah. 577 00:36:16,580 --> 00:36:18,580 So, yeah, they all have to fight with honor. 578 00:36:18,580 --> 00:36:22,580 Brax does not know because he has a mutant healing factor 579 00:36:22,580 --> 00:36:25,580 and shoots blades out of his arm. 580 00:36:25,580 --> 00:36:30,580 Turns invisible and invisible has super speed that is never used in combat. 581 00:36:30,580 --> 00:36:34,580 Yeah. Anyway, so the rest of the movie is everyone getting picked off one by one. 582 00:36:34,580 --> 00:36:37,580 A pretty decent cage fight with Brax. 583 00:36:37,580 --> 00:36:39,580 Yeah, but they got their money's worth out of that one. 584 00:36:39,580 --> 00:36:43,580 Yeah, we get some backstories to what happened with Jake 585 00:36:43,580 --> 00:36:45,580 and why he was running the beginning of the film. 586 00:36:45,580 --> 00:36:50,580 Turns out he saw what Brax could do and said, Nope, and ran away. 587 00:36:50,580 --> 00:36:53,580 Yeah, he got all cowardly, which is understandable. 588 00:36:53,580 --> 00:36:59,580 I've never fought an alien, so I could act like I'd be real cool and strong about it. 589 00:36:59,580 --> 00:37:02,580 But I don't think I would. Then you saw the alien ran away. Yeah. 590 00:37:02,580 --> 00:37:07,580 So, yes, like I mentioned, there is a really good like Nick Cage fight with Brax. 591 00:37:07,580 --> 00:37:13,580 Nick Cage's entire movie has his like pretty cool like bamboo like sword and like a bamboo shoot 592 00:37:13,580 --> 00:37:16,580 that he like we only ever see him kind of pull out. 593 00:37:16,580 --> 00:37:19,580 He does not use that sword in a fight because before he fights Brax, 594 00:37:19,580 --> 00:37:25,580 he opens a chest and pulls out a sword and stares at it with like hope in his eyes. 595 00:37:25,580 --> 00:37:29,580 And then in the fight scene, completely different sword. Yeah. 596 00:37:29,580 --> 00:37:33,580 So Nick Cage's backstory is he was six years ago. 597 00:37:33,580 --> 00:37:37,580 He was supposed to fight Brax, but begged for his life. 598 00:37:37,580 --> 00:37:41,580 And Brax don't fight cowards. So Brax let him go. 599 00:37:41,580 --> 00:37:43,580 Well, Brax thought he was insane. 600 00:37:43,580 --> 00:37:46,580 There's no honor in killing the insane. All right. 601 00:37:46,580 --> 00:37:48,580 And that's why he got to live. 602 00:37:48,580 --> 00:37:53,580 Also, so Wiley has been pretending to be insane since then. 603 00:37:53,580 --> 00:37:56,580 Who's choosing these fighters, by the way? 604 00:37:56,580 --> 00:38:00,580 Like, is there a council? Like, who's deciding who's going to go out and fight Brax? 605 00:38:00,580 --> 00:38:03,580 I'm assuming you train up nine apprentices a year. 606 00:38:03,580 --> 00:38:10,580 And so you've always got, you know, five levels of Jiu Jitsu apprentices coming up 607 00:38:10,580 --> 00:38:15,580 and you just sacrifice the six like as you grow up, your sixth year. 608 00:38:15,580 --> 00:38:18,580 Time to go fight alien Jesus and die. 609 00:38:18,580 --> 00:38:23,580 Oh, I thought you meant like just the year before you just gather up six people, nine people to fight. 610 00:38:23,580 --> 00:38:28,580 Like, you know, Nick Cage is just like, why don't why do we wait to the last year? 611 00:38:28,580 --> 00:38:31,580 No, you get five years of your life to train. 612 00:38:31,580 --> 00:38:34,580 And in the sixth year, you have to just die. 613 00:38:34,580 --> 00:38:36,580 Yeah. Brax is not a machine. 614 00:38:36,580 --> 00:38:38,580 Bullets, by the way. 615 00:38:38,580 --> 00:38:43,580 No, he's he can heal himself, but he's mowed down with a minigun for a minute. 616 00:38:43,580 --> 00:38:49,580 And he's shot with a shotgun and that gives him pause and not like dog paws. 617 00:38:49,580 --> 00:38:54,580 But either way, so be a weird turn of events. 618 00:38:54,580 --> 00:39:01,580 Brax fight next. Brax fights Nick Cage ends up killing the cage with a kind of Batman nightful, 619 00:39:01,580 --> 00:39:05,580 all breaking the bat like over the knee backbreaker. 620 00:39:05,580 --> 00:39:07,580 Well, he killed him four times, I think. 621 00:39:07,580 --> 00:39:09,580 Like it's there's a little overkill. 622 00:39:09,580 --> 00:39:12,580 He stabbed him like like three times in the stomach. 623 00:39:12,580 --> 00:39:16,580 Then he did a backbreaker, then said his throat, then he slits his throat. 624 00:39:16,580 --> 00:39:22,580 And then I'm pretty sure in the end, he like gets a bucket and drowns him. 625 00:39:22,580 --> 00:39:24,580 He's real thorough all the while. 626 00:39:24,580 --> 00:39:30,580 Jake and the love interest are just watching helplessly from the shadows. 627 00:39:30,580 --> 00:39:33,580 Because let's not forget, Jake is still a coward. 628 00:39:33,580 --> 00:39:38,580 Yes. Well, and this is but the thing that gets him out of out of his cowardice, 629 00:39:38,580 --> 00:39:44,580 the thing that shakes him awake is when the love interest asks him if he remembers who that old man was. 630 00:39:44,580 --> 00:39:46,580 Of course, Jake does. And he has amnesia. 631 00:39:46,580 --> 00:39:49,580 Turns out he was your father all along. 632 00:39:49,580 --> 00:39:56,580 And then we have some flashbacks to Jake being young, Jake being raised by a man who isn't a kid. 633 00:39:56,580 --> 00:40:02,580 Yeah. So I guess that's been debunked. 634 00:40:02,580 --> 00:40:10,580 So when when Jake fell into the cage cave, why didn't Wiley tell him that he was his dad? 635 00:40:10,580 --> 00:40:12,580 You're thinking about this too much. I'm sorry. 636 00:40:12,580 --> 00:40:16,580 I'm assuming he would have just been trying to knock some sense into him like, oh, what's going on? 637 00:40:16,580 --> 00:40:24,580 Or like just playing like maybe they had this repertoire or they would get together and like he was his favorite chair. 638 00:40:24,580 --> 00:40:30,580 Yeah, I was thinking about that once I knew the twist. 639 00:40:30,580 --> 00:40:32,580 So anyway, Brack shows up. 640 00:40:32,580 --> 00:40:36,580 Darnell shows up again with grenades. Yeah. 641 00:40:36,580 --> 00:40:40,580 Now they're at the temple. They're at the temple of the portal. Yeah. 642 00:40:40,580 --> 00:40:47,580 Portal temple, which I'm going to say, like when they did the effect of the portal opening as Bracks came back through, 643 00:40:47,580 --> 00:40:50,580 I was actually kind of like, oh, this is a pretty decent effect. 644 00:40:50,580 --> 00:40:53,580 It looks pretty good until Brack's runs through. 645 00:40:53,580 --> 00:40:58,580 And then he fucking Ezra Miller's his way in just running like an idiot. 646 00:40:58,580 --> 00:41:02,580 And the green screening is just rough. 647 00:41:02,580 --> 00:41:10,580 And I feel, you know, I really feel like the guy who played Brack's got paid appropriately. 648 00:41:10,580 --> 00:41:13,580 I don't know what he got paid, but it's not Nick Cage money. 649 00:41:13,580 --> 00:41:19,580 I will say, though, like I said, you see where the money went and the Brack's outfit is pretty decent. 650 00:41:19,580 --> 00:41:30,580 OK, speaking of how Brack's looks, he he's got this like mask that has like a little faceplate thing on it. 651 00:41:30,580 --> 00:41:33,580 And it's usually got like a little foggy cloud. 652 00:41:33,580 --> 00:41:40,580 But every once in a while when he gets all rage, bonery and like starts to kill somebody is stupid. 653 00:41:40,580 --> 00:41:48,580 Alien face comes out of the mist, but it's a 2D drawing, which was apparently done by a drunken Nick Cage. 654 00:41:48,580 --> 00:41:54,580 Yeah, he drew it on a napkin and the director was like this fucking slaps. 655 00:41:54,580 --> 00:41:57,580 And so he put it in the movie like too many times. Yes. 656 00:41:57,580 --> 00:42:06,580 Like, I can't see why they didn't just make a mask or a prosthetic or something for the guy's face to at least make it look three dimensional in there. 657 00:42:06,580 --> 00:42:10,580 Nope. Oh, man. It even looks like a sketch. 658 00:42:10,580 --> 00:42:17,580 It doesn't look like somebody went in like they didn't even pay somebody to scan it and like touch it up in Illustrator. 659 00:42:17,580 --> 00:42:23,580 Yeah, it should have been shown once at the end of the film. Yeah, when he dies, when he dies, but not like all the time. 660 00:42:23,580 --> 00:42:25,580 Just have the glowing red eyes. That would have been enough. Yeah. 661 00:42:25,580 --> 00:42:29,580 If he dies, if he knows no spoilers here, people anyway. 662 00:42:29,580 --> 00:42:34,580 So back to the ending of the movie, Brax and Jake have a punch up. 663 00:42:34,580 --> 00:42:40,580 Jake has learned from earlier on in the film from Tony Jaa, who's shockingly in this movie. 664 00:42:40,580 --> 00:42:46,580 Yeah. Also not one of the top two like leads of the movie. 665 00:42:46,580 --> 00:42:50,580 Now, Nicholas Cage, Tony Jaa, neither of them leading this movie. 666 00:42:50,580 --> 00:42:55,580 Both of them worked. I mean, we know for sure Nick Cage only worked three days on this movie. 667 00:42:55,580 --> 00:42:58,580 They probably had Jaa for the same amount of time, probably less, honestly. 668 00:42:58,580 --> 00:43:04,580 Well, from the first time you see Nicholas Cage to the second time, there's a 30 minute gap. Yeah. 669 00:43:04,580 --> 00:43:10,580 There's probably 30 minutes of the movie that include Nicholas Cage. And then it's over. Yeah. 670 00:43:10,580 --> 00:43:18,580 It's like and then he dies and is dead for the last 20. You get about like 37 minutes of Nicholas Cage. Yeah. 671 00:43:18,580 --> 00:43:24,580 Tony Jaa tells Jake after after telling him, I have a license to kill you and that license does not expire. 672 00:43:24,580 --> 00:43:29,580 But now I'm going to plot exposition how to kill the alien to you, that the alien can be hurt. 673 00:43:29,580 --> 00:43:32,580 And it takes him about five seconds to regenerate. 674 00:43:32,580 --> 00:43:40,580 So with this knowledge, which is not true based on everything we've seen, it's now wholly up to like how they feel in that scene. 675 00:43:40,580 --> 00:43:45,580 Yes. And how long it takes, because sometimes you cut him like half of a half open. 676 00:43:45,580 --> 00:43:48,580 I was at half off. That'd be weird. 677 00:43:48,580 --> 00:43:52,580 Cut some half off and it just heals immediately. 678 00:43:52,580 --> 00:43:59,580 But then you, you know, poking with a pencil and it takes five, 10 seconds. 679 00:43:59,580 --> 00:44:03,580 And I loved it. So either way, they killed. 680 00:44:03,580 --> 00:44:10,580 He kills Brax in the most honorable way possible. Blows a hole in him, then shoves a grenade in there. 681 00:44:10,580 --> 00:44:13,580 Yeah. Two grenades. Then kicks him into the portal. 682 00:44:13,580 --> 00:44:17,580 Then kicks him into the portal. Yeah. Oh, I got a question. 683 00:44:17,580 --> 00:44:20,580 Why did the portal crack like it opened up? 684 00:44:20,580 --> 00:44:28,580 Brax comes through, it like gets cracked, but it still works because it opens back up and they like kick him into it. 685 00:44:28,580 --> 00:44:32,580 Thinking too much about this plot. I'm not even trying to think about the plot. 686 00:44:32,580 --> 00:44:35,580 I'm just like mostly impressed with the scenery. Yeah. 687 00:44:35,580 --> 00:44:40,580 But again, where the money went is obvious. Yeah. The sets are nice. 688 00:44:40,580 --> 00:44:46,580 Yes, that's turned out pretty good. So many of them read as like classic, like video game platformers. 689 00:44:46,580 --> 00:44:53,580 Like when they're escaping in the desert, like a military base, it's set up like it would have been in Counter Strike. 690 00:44:53,580 --> 00:45:02,580 There's things to hide behind, like boxes with cargo netting and there's ruins, ruins to like run on top of. 691 00:45:02,580 --> 00:45:08,580 And it was very, I don't know, ungraceful Assassin's Creed. 692 00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:11,580 Favorite Nick Cage line from this film. 693 00:45:11,580 --> 00:45:19,580 So there's a scene where the group of ninjas is walking into, I think it was the temple. 694 00:45:19,580 --> 00:45:26,580 And Nick Cage was like, oh, you know, I'm kind of hungry. Does anybody have something I could eat? 695 00:45:26,580 --> 00:45:31,580 Maybe, maybe I could pop down and get like a noodle or something from the temple. 696 00:45:31,580 --> 00:45:36,580 And it's like somebody's like, get Wiley something to eat somebody. 697 00:45:36,580 --> 00:45:40,580 And it's like, OK, well, that was just like a throw away thing. 698 00:45:40,580 --> 00:45:54,580 But then, like literally in the next scene, like in Carmen, I think shows up with some food and like in a bag, just a bag, little like brown lunch sack and hands it to Wiley. 699 00:45:54,580 --> 00:46:00,580 And he just kind of looks at it and he says, yeah, I could eat. 700 00:46:00,580 --> 00:46:04,580 What? It's just so dumb. 701 00:46:04,580 --> 00:46:07,580 It's like somebody please feed Riley or Wiley. 702 00:46:07,580 --> 00:46:10,580 And then they do. 703 00:46:10,580 --> 00:46:17,580 And he's just like so nonplussed about it like, yeah, OK, I guess I could eat. 704 00:46:17,580 --> 00:46:19,580 I don't know what he ate. 705 00:46:19,580 --> 00:46:21,580 I don't know where she got it. 706 00:46:21,580 --> 00:46:24,580 Well, we later see him like cooking a fish on a stick. 707 00:46:24,580 --> 00:46:28,580 Yeah. I mean, he obviously is a character who enjoys to eat. 708 00:46:28,580 --> 00:46:30,580 Yes. Which is fine. 709 00:46:30,580 --> 00:46:33,580 He was the most dad bod of all the ninjas. 710 00:46:33,580 --> 00:46:39,580 Yes. Well, you know, he six years of not training to fight a spaceman. 711 00:46:39,580 --> 00:46:46,580 Yeah. So because why would you continue to train when you're already like excuse you're out? 712 00:46:46,580 --> 00:46:52,580 So we know my second favorite line, which is, oh, get off my piano. 713 00:46:52,580 --> 00:46:58,580 But the best line in this film was the poet warrior in the sci fi sense. 714 00:46:58,580 --> 00:47:00,580 The spaceman. Yeah. 715 00:47:00,580 --> 00:47:03,580 Give that man another Oscar. 716 00:47:03,580 --> 00:47:07,580 All right. So we touched on the fact that this thing costs 25 million to make. 717 00:47:07,580 --> 00:47:10,580 Yes. Obviously, it came out during covid times. 718 00:47:10,580 --> 00:47:13,580 It was November 20, 20. Yeah. 719 00:47:13,580 --> 00:47:17,580 How much money do you think this may I did look at it? 720 00:47:17,580 --> 00:47:19,580 Don't answer. I know as well. 721 00:47:19,580 --> 00:47:21,580 I look at it. It's so bad. 722 00:47:21,580 --> 00:47:23,580 It's so depressing. It's like under one hundred thousand. 723 00:47:23,580 --> 00:47:30,580 Right. Yeah. One hundred ninety nine thousand nine hundred and twenty four dollars. And I looked at those and I did some like inflation math. 724 00:47:30,580 --> 00:47:36,580 Yeah. If nine more people had bought a ticket, it would have hit one hundred K. Oh, man. 725 00:47:36,580 --> 00:47:39,580 I would have bought a ticket. Nine people. 726 00:47:39,580 --> 00:47:44,580 Yeah. I mean, it's that's depressingly bad. 727 00:47:44,580 --> 00:47:49,580 I mean, this is a depressing bad film that is so much fun and everyone needs to see it. 728 00:47:49,580 --> 00:47:51,580 It's on Netflix right now. It's absolutely. 729 00:47:51,580 --> 00:47:56,580 Yeah. If you're listening in the in the future and it's not on Netflix, you're kind of bone. 730 00:47:56,580 --> 00:48:00,580 Like, I don't know what to tell you. But right now, at this undisclosed time, it's on Netflix. 731 00:48:00,580 --> 00:48:08,580 So here's my fun fact for this film. Nick Cage was choice number two to play Wiley. 732 00:48:08,580 --> 00:48:12,580 It was originally meant for Bruce Willis. Oh, yeah. 733 00:48:12,580 --> 00:48:19,580 Who, according to the director, director loved the script, but never got back to him or his people. 734 00:48:19,580 --> 00:48:25,580 Yeah. Well, I mean, for the best, he got with that cosmic sins movie. 735 00:48:25,580 --> 00:48:30,580 And that was a rough one. I don't know if anybody's seen that. 736 00:48:30,580 --> 00:48:33,580 It's not it's. 737 00:48:33,580 --> 00:48:37,580 We're not here to talk about Bruce Willis. Yeah, we shouldn't. 738 00:48:37,580 --> 00:48:41,580 We shouldn't talk about that movie. I wish him the best with his aphasia. 739 00:48:41,580 --> 00:48:43,580 Yes. Don't sue me. I think. 740 00:48:43,580 --> 00:48:48,580 Thoughts and opinions of this podcaster that belong to those who say them and no one else. 741 00:48:48,580 --> 00:48:53,580 I got my thoughts and opinions from a guy on the street. So you go after him. 742 00:48:53,580 --> 00:48:57,580 So I got it. I got to ask the question, like, do you like this movie? 743 00:48:57,580 --> 00:49:02,580 You ended up talking about this about two thirds more than you talked about face off at this point. 744 00:49:02,580 --> 00:49:08,580 Everyone's seen face off that we needed to explain the rich tapestry that was to Jetson. Yeah. 745 00:49:08,580 --> 00:49:14,580 Yes, I like this movie. It's not a good movie, but I like it. 746 00:49:14,580 --> 00:49:17,580 It's more fun to talk about things that are bad. 747 00:49:17,580 --> 00:49:21,580 I could sit down and watch this movie again months from now. 748 00:49:21,580 --> 00:49:26,580 Not like, oh, I mean, I could watch it again this week, but I don't want to. 749 00:49:26,580 --> 00:49:30,580 I've seen it four times already. Just to be fair. 750 00:49:30,580 --> 00:49:34,580 I mean, I think it's pretty I think we have a clear winner this week. 751 00:49:34,580 --> 00:49:37,580 Yeah, there's clearly a better movie. 752 00:49:37,580 --> 00:49:42,580 No matter how much I enjoy watching it, it's not better than face off. 753 00:49:42,580 --> 00:49:46,580 No, it is not. OK. Oh, the big reveal. 754 00:49:46,580 --> 00:49:49,580 What do we think? Fuck, we already fucked it up. 755 00:49:49,580 --> 00:49:52,580 We get people roped into like our fucking. 756 00:49:52,580 --> 00:49:59,580 I mean, the people who are who have mistakenly decided to click on this podcast and see what the first episode are. 757 00:49:59,580 --> 00:50:02,580 No, you guys are actually great. You're all fantastic. 758 00:50:02,580 --> 00:50:05,580 And we love you. Thank you, Josh. 759 00:50:05,580 --> 00:50:07,580 You promised to listen to this. Yeah. 760 00:50:07,580 --> 00:50:09,580 If you don't listen, Josh, I know where you live. 761 00:50:09,580 --> 00:50:12,580 We're going to quiz you later. I'm not going to pet your dog. 762 00:50:12,580 --> 00:50:16,580 When we get one of you, we know it's Josh. They can they can sue us all they want. 763 00:50:16,580 --> 00:50:19,580 They know we don't have any money. Yeah. 764 00:50:19,580 --> 00:50:22,580 Face off. Clearly a better movie. You knew this going in. 765 00:50:22,580 --> 00:50:26,580 No, it's got. Well, it's actually a Nicolas Cage movie. 766 00:50:26,580 --> 00:50:30,580 Yes, I feel like we kind of I mean, we don't know all these movies. 767 00:50:30,580 --> 00:50:35,580 No, I'd never heard of it until I came up with this dumb idea. 768 00:50:35,580 --> 00:50:38,580 Just being and Peter said, hey, what about you, Jitsu? 769 00:50:38,580 --> 00:50:43,580 Yeah, just being billed as a Nicolas Cage movie was a little I mean, I've seen it with other movies. 770 00:50:43,580 --> 00:50:46,580 He's he's the actor that's going to get you to watch it. 771 00:50:46,580 --> 00:50:50,580 And we did. This is one of those and Nicolas Cage films. Yes. 772 00:50:50,580 --> 00:50:54,580 With Nicolas Cage. But he is at his cageist. 773 00:50:54,580 --> 00:50:57,580 I would happily put this within the cage of songs. 774 00:50:57,580 --> 00:51:01,580 It's the Renaissance of cage films as a performance. It's pretty good. 775 00:51:01,580 --> 00:51:05,580 Yeah, it's a little I think it's a little mild. 776 00:51:05,580 --> 00:51:08,580 It's not I expected lazier. 777 00:51:08,580 --> 00:51:13,580 I didn't. I knew he was going to give us a unique performance for it. 778 00:51:13,580 --> 00:51:16,580 Yeah. And I didn't think he was going to phone it in. 779 00:51:16,580 --> 00:51:21,580 I've never seen him phone in a row, which is what actually makes this whole thing interesting. 780 00:51:21,580 --> 00:51:24,580 It's like he's going to try this whole time. So I'm going to try with him. 781 00:51:24,580 --> 00:51:27,580 So that's a it's two down. 782 00:51:27,580 --> 00:51:30,580 So we will be returning to face off eventually. 783 00:51:30,580 --> 00:51:33,580 But yeah, those are our thoughts on face off and Jiu Jitsu. 784 00:51:33,580 --> 00:51:37,580 This is our first podcast. We remind you, we will probably get better at this. 785 00:51:37,580 --> 00:51:40,580 No, everyone shaking their heads. It's worth a shot. Yeah. 786 00:51:40,580 --> 00:51:42,580 Anyway, I'm having fun. 787 00:51:42,580 --> 00:51:47,580 Any final thoughts on either movie and or just Nick Cage in general? 788 00:51:47,580 --> 00:51:51,580 The man is a genius. He is definitely a hardworking actor. 789 00:51:51,580 --> 00:51:54,580 It's good to see. I highly recommend both films. 790 00:51:54,580 --> 00:51:57,580 I would say you should watch both of them. Definitely watch them both. 791 00:51:57,580 --> 00:52:01,580 And you know what? Make it a double feature. Don't don't make a double feature. 792 00:52:01,580 --> 00:52:04,580 I've done that. I did that today. It's a lot. 793 00:52:04,580 --> 00:52:07,580 I did it yesterday. It's fine. Or do whatever. 794 00:52:07,580 --> 00:52:11,580 Watch along with us. Yeah, we'll find a way to actually remember 795 00:52:11,580 --> 00:52:18,580 which movies we're watching for the next episode so we can tell you at the end of whatever episode we record. 796 00:52:18,580 --> 00:52:21,580 Do we have the bracket up? What do we want to do next time? 797 00:52:21,580 --> 00:52:25,580 I think we should save weird for last. Yeah, do we want to do funny or serious? 798 00:52:25,580 --> 00:52:30,580 Oh, I think we were down to wasn't adaptation like the top of the next one. 799 00:52:30,580 --> 00:52:34,580 Yeah. So if we if we go for funny, it's adaptation against Army of One, 800 00:52:34,580 --> 00:52:37,580 which is great because I don't think I've seen either of these movies. 801 00:52:37,580 --> 00:52:40,580 I've seen adaptation a long time ago. 802 00:52:40,580 --> 00:52:44,580 I'm going to I want to go with that because while doing research for Jujitsu, 803 00:52:44,580 --> 00:52:49,580 this film had one of three Nick Cage swordfight performances in it. 804 00:52:49,580 --> 00:52:53,580 And in Army of One, he apparently has a swordfight with Osama Bin Laden. 805 00:52:53,580 --> 00:52:57,580 Awesome. OK. Adaptation and Army of One. 806 00:52:57,580 --> 00:53:01,580 Yeah, that's what you're going to have to watch before you listen to us again. 807 00:53:01,580 --> 00:53:05,580 Otherwise, it won't make sense. And we'll all know you were lazy. 808 00:53:05,580 --> 00:53:33,580 Do your homework. Stay in school. Drink your milk.