Oh, God. Oh, my God.
Kind of like whatever fell out of the back of the truck.
Yeah, it up on the shelves.
Yeah, it fell out of the back of the truck and then rolled across
three international borders and ended up in America.
I think I've always shopped at a stars like twice,
and it was out of like necessity, like proximity.
Yeah. It's like I just need this thing and I'm right here
and I should be in and out before I catch anything.
Who chooses to shop at stars?
It's either that or you're so poor.
It's a lifestyle. You have to stop here.
All right. Now we're starting to talk down on people about their choices
and I feel really good about this.
So I'm going to need you to start bagging on the pores again,
because it really helped for my segue to get us into this episode.
I mean, if we can get you into a proper segue,
I'm going to do everything I can not to.
Welcome back to Cage match, colon around about way of meeting Nicholas Cage.
I'm Sean here with Nick and Nick and our producer Peter. Hello.
And this week we have our special guest Marissa. Hello.
Well, why are you here?
Well, I was asked.
Oh, OK. See, I'm not I'm not involved in the guest selection process.
So like somebody will be like, Oh, that's great.
Marissa is going to be on the show.
What's how'd that come about?
I'm like, I don't know.
Well, OK. So I was asked. That's the short answer.
Long answer was I think I was talking about Moonstruck
and basically how I use Nicholas Cage's hand
at work all the time to discuss people.
Fantastic. So you have Nicholas Cage's hand.
I do. As my desk.
People on this podcast, we discuss, rate and review
64 Nicholas Cage's top films and we will
decide what ultimately is the best Nick Cage film as decided by Nick and myself.
Yes. No one else.
Today we are discussing Moonstruck from 1987 and Honeymoon in Vegas from 1990.
We're going to do this again, too, aren't we?
So I think to do to.
This is our comedy bracket, I believe.
Funny guy, funny guy, funny cage.
And it's really unfortunate that you have to ask if this is supposed to be funny.
There are times where I question
comedy. Well, I mean, there's times when I question him as a tough guy, too.
But we also assigned these pretty arbitrarily,
not having much knowledge of the movies just based on trailers.
Yeah. That Peter watched. Yeah.
Oh, man. That was a dream of a night.
We we broke this down based on descriptions that Peter gave us.
Yeah, it worked out pretty well. I think so.
I just thought it was because I had moon in both titles.
No, that's there's actually been a lot of like random sort of like weird
alignments between movies in general.
This one has two weak ass men getting cuckolded.
So yeah, great.
So the first movie that has ended in Kukul.
And this podcast, you see, it's so weird.
Yeah. What Kukul?
Weird is one way of saying it wrong.
And another one.
I know you're talking about. Yeah.
So, Marissa, had you seen Honeymoon in Vegas before?
Yes. Really? But like a very long time ago.
Interesting. This was a total blind spot for me.
Probably in the 90s.
Are you now interested in watching the musical?
No, because there is a musical based on it. What?
Yeah. I don't know.
Assholes. It's the first movie.
Like a movie about like a stage musical or a live or like, OK, with songs and shit.
You know what? It's interesting, but I'm going to move away from this.
We're going to we're going to come back here in two hours after we've watched this.
See you. See everyone then.
Boy, that was terrible.
I can't believe you spent that time.
What was your favorite song, Nick?
The one with Spider-Man in it was definitely my best.
I don't have any better jokes than that.
So we're going to move on now.
Mercy, you're the guest.
Do you want to explain what this movie is about? Yes.
Nicholas Cage is a private investigator who investigates
men who are being cheated on
on behalf of them.
And he takes evidence.
He is dating Sarah Jessica Parker, who is way out of his league.
And he is he promises his dying mother,
who's Anne Bancroft, that he will never get married.
And so he has a phobia, an avoidance of marriage.
But Sarah Jessica Parker wants him to get married.
So he agrees they go to Vegas.
He has to have one last poker game before they can get married.
And James Kahn has spotted Sarah Jessica Parker.
She looks like a dead ringer for his deceased wife.
Dead ringer.
Dead life.
But a ringer.
Physical comedy.
Oh, yeah, that was a wedding ring finger joke.
And then the wrong hand because I am afraid of marriage.
I am too.
Sorry, this is a movie that like once again, really hit home,
strikes on a lot of things that I'm like, oh, man, I don't want to get married.
Maybe we're just fucking weird, scary.
Also, you do look like someone who should be an Elvis impersonator.
Oh, I thought you were going to say
you do look like somebody who shouldn't be married.
That's cold. But I guess well received.
Yeah, fair.
So James Khan hatches a plan to lure Nicholas Cage into a
poker game where he can win money from Nicholas Cage
so that he's indebted to such a point that he has to offer up.
Yes, I agree to have Sarah Jessica Parker go for a weekend with James Khan.
Somehow he takes her to Hawaii.
That felt a little odd.
There's a Pat Morita shows up as a taxi driver.
Peter Boyle shows up as a as a native Hawaiian chief.
Says some things that are what we would call problematic these days.
Yes, I'm not going to lie.
I love Peter Boyle's role in this movie.
I mean, I just love him.
Also, he was just obsessed with musicals.
All I can think of is Frankenstein, though.
Yeah, absolutely. Putting on the ritz.
So they do detour in Kauai.
Nicholas Cage goes out antics and Sue.
They end up back in Vegas.
The only way he can get there is to parachute in as an Elvis impersonator.
By this time, Sarah Jessica Parker had agreed to marry James Khan,
which seemed really far fetched.
Under very dubious circumstances, James Khan really starts lying.
True reason for marrying, agreeing to marry anyone at this point is very spacious.
Well, all she wants to do is get married and have kids.
Yeah, which I understand that's every woman's core desire. But
the views in this podcast are that of Nick and Nick's alone.
Wait a minute.
I have to take ownership for everything you say now. Yes.
Anyways, they end up they end up
she ends up falling back in love with Nick Cage because he jumps out of.
Yeah. Grand gestures.
Because apparently he was afraid of heights.
I don't know. That was like a character trait thing that like never was.
They never established that it was in the Wikipedia said that there was.
There's a lot of stuff in the Wikipedia for this one that is blatantly wrong.
Maybe they added that for the musical.
It is fair to point out that Wikipedia is not a credible source.
True, because it is all user update. Yeah.
There is one character
that is a callback to another movie, and that's Johnny.
What's his name? Who plays Johnny Sandwich?
And yes. Oh, yeah. Johnny Roastbeef Williams. Yeah.
Fuck, yeah. God, I'm such a great character.
What a name.
I wish people would just start.
I'm going to change my last name to Sandwich.
Sandwich is a good last name.
So he had a great name, his best.
And then the Nick Cage's buddy was Sally Moller's.
Yeah, that's also really good.
And he's a dentist. Yeah, that makes sense.
Do you think he was a dentist because he had that last number?
He changed his name when he got into the. You have to be a dentist.
Yeah. It's just like, sorry, dude.
Family name, family business. Yeah.
Richard, I to you. Got to do it.
Let's start from let's start from the beginning.
His crazy ass dying mother. Oh, yeah.
That was a great real quick cameo. Yeah. Yeah.
She was she gives a real look right before he dies.
Oh, man. Those wild eyes.
There's some wild eyes in this. I liked it a lot.
Now that she died, she's dead as fuck.
What do you think of the animated intro?
OK, so I liked there was like this was a time it made me think back.
I could be wrong that the money pit has one of those,
but I feel like the money pit has an animated intro.
I can't remember if it does, but it definitely has that same kind of vibe.
Yeah. What's the money?
Tom Hanks and Shelly Long.
Yeah. They put a bunch of money in a house.
That's a piece of shit. Yep.
Man, it's actually based on a 1940s movie, Mr.
Blanding Stream House.
Well, look at you, Marissa.
You're better at us than us. Thanks for the context.
Get out. I hope I got that right.
I'm not going to fact check it. Yeah.
That's all we're here for. This is like Wikipedia.
You can say anything and it's really not citable in court
because we don't know shit.
Here's another thing. Just a bunch of idiots.
This is also true.
So the guy who did music for Honeymoon in Vegas, David Newman,
went to school with my dad.
He was actually in my Uncle Tom's class.
My uncle comes a year younger than my dad.
And his brother, Thomas Newman, is a very famous music scorer for movies.
He's gotten Academy Awards and stuff.
Can we get him on this podcast?
And is he going to get Nicholas Cage on this?
Is he Randy Newman?
That's their cousin, I think.
Right. Yeah. You fucking kidding me?
No. Why aren't you telling us these things when we meet you?
These are hot facts.
I want to sing songs about short people with Randy Newman
on our Nicholas Cage podcast.
I invite Randy Newman over, please.
I had a I had a quick thought of Randy Quaid for a second.
Oh, no. I'm sorry. He's gone.
He's left the country.
Yeah. I like Quaid. Quaid.
Yeah. So mom kicks it.
Yeah. So then it cuts to four years later.
Voice over of Nick Cage explaining that he's a private eye.
Great fake mustache.
Oh, and he's got one of those really cool, slim cameras.
Yes, I love. I want to get one of those.
Great fake mustache.
The best of the fake mustaches I've seen him wear on this podcast.
The best. This is the most fake mustache.
It's big. It's fake.
It's it really went with the pants. Yeah.
We find out that he has been dating Sarah Jessica Parker, who's a school teacher.
He pops the question one night and they're off to Vegas the next day.
OK, we have to pause before we jump too far into the Vegas park.
And we've got to talk about the guy that comes to his
detective agency.
Oh, yeah.
So he has this one client who's convinced that his wife is cheating on him
with Mike Tyson and he shows pictures and she's a looker.
And so it makes sense.
That's true. She's quite the lady.
Yeah. We'll post a picture on the Patriot.
Or is she? Oh, man.
Rude. We got to post a picture of her with Mike Tyson.
Yeah, that's the one.
I got. Later he comes back like with, you know, with photographic evidence.
And it's clearly just a Xeroxed
picture with like her head cut out next to Mike Tyson.
And the guy's like, see, you didn't believe me, but it's real.
I have proof. It is so good.
Who is that actor?
I don't have that information in front of me, but he's he's in things.
Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think it's Robert Costanza.
He was on Saturday Night Fever and Die Hard 2 and City Slickers and Total Recall.
OK, so Robert Costanza.
Total Recall references in this episode alone.
I know. Damn.
I'm just waiting for someone to make an indecent proposal reference.
I mean, yeah, that's kind of what this movie is.
But you know, I mean, somebody's going to get a decent proposal tonight.
I looked it up in decent proposals.
1993. Oh, there you go.
So I'd like to say they were inspired.
Do you remember like when they did Robin Hood with Kevin Costner?
Yes. Robin Hood Men in Tights came out right around the same time.
I feel like there was a lot of movies where there was a comedy
and then a serious movie.
Oh, yeah. It just happened to be made around the same time.
It's like they only had so many ideas.
Yeah. And we still have even less now.
I know. It's true.
As we're now just remaking 90s movies.
I can't wait to get Biodome redone.
Oh, it's happening.
Is it? It's a gritty reboot.
It is. No, it is.
Fuck that. It's not.
It's a comedy, but it stars.
It's a Mark Duplass film.
OK, so it stars Mark Duplass and I can't remember the name of the other actor,
but they're trapped in.
Is it his brother? No, they're trapped in.
Is it Terry Crews? Is it Polly Shore?
No. Do they bring him back?
I hope he has a major cameo.
Is Tenacious D in this one also? I hope so.
No, they're trapped in a dome.
They have no contact with the outside world and they slowly start going insane.
That doesn't sound the same.
But it's a biodome. But it's a biodome.
Yeah. OK. I mean, I buy that.
So they're in Vegas.
Khan shows up, starts ordering people around, sees
Sarah Jessica Parker and is like, that's a dead ringer for my wife.
And he's sad because his wife died of skin cancer, I assume,
because he's really weird about the sun.
Yeah, yeah. He's always talking about her like he said her skin.
The doctor said her skin was like a saddlebag.
Yeah. It's like, God damn.
Which I thought it was weird that he owned a house in Hawaii
and he's hanging out in Vegas. Yeah.
Yeah. What's that about?
Well, he's a big time gambler.
I mean, the gambling scene's probably pretty limited in Hawaii.
People are like betting pineapples and
some of the subi.
So he or what?
These are the things I love.
If I had to gamble those things, I'd be like, OK,
this really means something to me.
I don't want to lose my subi.
So I better win this hand.
The subi is a great thing to win in poker because, you know, tax man can't tax.
We eat. That's right.
Can we get it?
As government.
But James Khan sets up
a poker game in his private suite and slips
like an invitation under their door to get him in there to con him out of this.
What was the game actually rigged?
I think it has to be. I mean, oh, it was definitely rigged.
Because they kind of make it seem like it was.
But like, what are the fucking odds?
For him to get a straight flush and then for James Khan
to get a slightly higher straight flush right afterwards.
It's like a statistic anomaly.
Like two straight flushes in one hand.
The likelihood is even outside of Hollywood's realm of possibility.
It seems like Johnny Sandwich had his had his hands in this one.
Yeah, I mean, they sharked him.
It's to Asian Elvis.
There's also an Elvis committee.
Oh, Eddie. Yeah. Yeah.
There's Eddie is so good.
I love many amazing Elvis's in this movie, including Bruno Mars.
Yes. So we we get into the game
and it builds up to a hand that should be unbeatable.
I believe there's straight flush to Jack.
Yeah, straight flush to the Jack.
And so Cage like keeps taking more and more money on credit.
James Khan takes the hand with a straight flush to the queen.
And Cage is just bugging destroyed.
And the James Khan is the indecent proposal.
Or at this point, I think it's a pretty decent proposal
where Khan's like, hey, let me spend the weekend with your wife.
I definitely won't try and fuck her. Nothing sexy.
Well, I mean, beyond the normal James Khan sexiness.
And he can't find the money anywhere else.
So he talks to her and she's like, well, I guess Sarah Jessica Parker.
I keep wanting to call her Sarah Michelle Geller.
Stupid three names, Sarah's Sarah Jessica Parker is just hanging out with Tommy.
Nick Cage is Jack singer Sarah Jessica Parker's Betsy Nolan.
James Khan is Tommy Korman and Pat Morita is Mahi Mahi.
Oh, yes. He's the only person in this movie
that is likable, even though he's still a shitbag.
Yeah, this is shit. But he doesn't likeable shit.
He's the only one who kind of does the right thing eventually.
I think Peter Boyle's very likable. That's fair.
And Eddie's likable and Roy Bacon is likable.
Roy Bacon fucking rules. Yeah.
God, there are some fucking bangers of names in this movie.
They did it right. Roy Bacon's got some fucking chompers.
That's what I thought. He is going to have dentures or something. Absolutely.
Or like three sets of teeth.
It's just like a shark. Yeah.
Roy Bacon's the leader of the flying Elvis's. Yeah. Yeah.
He doesn't come in until like the last 15 minutes of the movie.
So Tommy comes around. He's like, oh, let's go to Hawaii.
I'm going to take you to Hawaii.
And then his wife's like, I'm going to Hawaii with him.
And so your weekend turns in like five days.
Yeah. So now she's expected to come back on Wednesday.
And Cage is freaking out.
So he chases them to Hawaii when he just can't cope with anything.
And he's like following them around the island.
See, this is my biggest missed opportunity with this film.
He's supposed to be a private eye. He's real bad at it.
So they get this guy, Mahi Mahi, Pat Morita, the taxi driver on it.
He intercepts Cage at the airport and Cage is like, hey, take me to Tommy Corman's house.
He's like, OK, I got it. Everybody knows. Everybody know him.
Oh, I did something racist.
And it takes him to Chief Orman's house instead of Tommy Corman's house.
And then we get Peter Boyle singing a lot of like South Pacific and show tunes.
We cut back in finishing South Pacific.
So it's just they've just been sitting there for the entirety of that musical.
Yeah, pretty much. Nick Cage gets outside and he's like, oh, man.
Oh, my, my. It looks like I left my keys in the bathroom.
Could you run in and get them?
And so Pat Morita is like, yeah, I'll go do that.
And so he runs inside like I pronounced all of it.
That was good. Yeah. Way to rein it in.
Kukuldri. Some of us never learn.
Pat Morita goes back inside.
Cage just steals his taxi and drives off.
Let's let's talk about Tommy's seduction, quote unquote, the seductory.
Yeah, he's a boomer. Yeah.
I mean, my favorite part is he's a boomer in Hawaii.
They make him look old so fast.
It's just, you know, can we talk about his awesome art?
Oh, the like Kamasutra. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Right when you enter the house.
Yeah. Welcome, granddaughter.
Yeah. People fucking his son and granddaughter are on their way.
That was like one of his cells to like get it to come to Hawaii.
It's like, you'll meet my son and my granddaughter.
Yeah, nothing weird could happen.
So how will be here?
How weird is it for your son to be introduced to the woman you just met
who looks apparently exactly like his mother?
He did not react to it. Yeah.
It must be only James Khan sees it that way.
Oh, yeah. Khan gives the full court press. Yeah.
And it fucking works.
It admits to her that like he like set up the game
so he could like have the weekend with her immediately tells her he's in love with her.
He was definitely love bombing her. Yeah. Yeah. For sure.
Apparently works.
I guess we go back to Vegas because Tommy's gone back to Vegas
with Betsy to get married now.
And when we're in Vegas now, Tommy's telling her that like the game was
only for three thousand dollars and that Nick Cage put her up instead of.
Despite what he'd said before.
Yeah. So he's changing the game.
He's like, Oh, I only said that to be gentle with you.
To be fair, her character is a big old dummy.
Yeah. Like which really speaks very early for their ex wife or the dead wife.
And she's teaching children. Yes. Yeah.
That's a scary thought.
So Nick Cage can't get a direct flight back to Vegas to chase them.
He ends up going to San Diego and then catching a private plane
from San Diego to Vegas, which ends up just being the flying Elvis's.
They're going there for a big flying Elvis thing,
which turns out to be skydiving.
Yeah. Well, this is clearly before 9-11 because there's no TSA. Right.
He just walks out there with the cardboard sign.
Well, yeah, he's just on the tarmac.
Before that, when he when he start, when he's yelling at Ben Stein
earlier in the film or the ticket agents like, you know, sir, can you get back in line?
Like, why? What are you going to do?
Arrest me. Send me to airport jail.
And then everyone in line is like, Yeah, this guy fucking fucks.
This guy's good.
I just like the fact that they were using the green on black screens at the airport.
Yes. Oh, yeah.
Made me wistful for simpler time.
Yeah, those were easier days.
So James Khan, she's like, you know, let's wait.
What's the rush? Let's because she agrees to marry him.
And then he like starts, you know, grabbing her and it's like, never walk away from me.
Yeah. He starts becoming a huge douchebag offers her half a million dollars
to marry him today, which immediately escalates to a million dollars.
And if they I think you just hold out a little bit of divorce. Yeah.
Well, you get in paper to write that in writing.
Yeah. I would have gotten that in writing.
And I would have like I would have gotten in writing.
I would have gotten the cash up front.
I would have gone to the chapel.
I mean, it's big and say, no, you can have all these things. Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely. He has guys who do these.
There's a notary somewhere. He knows one.
He's very intimate with his balls.
It's Tony Shalhoub. Tony Shalhoub.
It's a hell of a way to introduce yourself to somebody.
Yeah. It's a power move. Yeah.
So yeah, that's a Vegas handshake.
He's up there with the flying Elvis's needs to jump.
So winds up jumping out of a plane with the flying Elvis's.
Sarah Jessica Parker to get away from Tommy has like dressed up in a showgirl outfit.
I felt very convenient.
That's a lot of outfit to get into in such a short amount of time.
When they're like running through the crowds and she's being chased by Tommy,
they're announcing all the flying Elvis's that are coming in.
The last one is.
Jack Singer.
So New York City. Yeah.
So she hears that numerous times runs up there, you know, runs past security.
They embrace, they kiss.
Tommy sees this and goes, it's over.
He jumped out of a plane for her.
Set up a game.
That's the movie.
Yeah. Then they go get married in front of all those Elvis's.
Which is the only way to get married as far as I can.
So my parents get married in front of a bunch of Elvis's married by an Elvis.
Oh, I honestly.
It was all this time.
If I could manufacture it right, I would love to have an Elvis wedding
where everybody dresses like Elvis, except for the the person.
Yeah. Efficient.
And just like do it in Vegas.
And only Elvis's can attend.
I like that. If you had to dress up as an Elvis, what era Elvis
would be your preference to get married as dead on the toilet?
You bring the toilet. Oh, yeah.
That's a seat with you anywhere you go.
Mm hmm. I got to have like the sweetest pompadour Elvis.
That's my Elvis.
I do. 1969. Come back.
Elvis. Fringe. 69. Yeah.
Nice. Good call. Yeah.
Yeah. He's like starting to lose it.
It's still sexy. That's me.
Dad bought Elvis started to lose it, but still sexy.
Not doing those military pictures anymore. Elvis.
This is the really that's thanks.
Oh, that's all we can hope for at this point. Yeah.
I do want to talk about his form of acting in this movie,
which is just to scream every line in this film
and not in like a very cagey way, just to violently yell at people.
It was just volume. Yeah. Yeah.
I think this character definitely got directed up.
Interestingly, Andrew Bergman.
Yeah. Written and directed by Andrew Bergman.
Right. So he did a lot of things such as strip.
He wrote strip. He wrote Blazing Saddles.
It could happen to you. That's what you're thinking of.
I was thinking about all three of those, actually,
because I knew there was one blazing saddles that I like.
It could happen to you, which is a good movie.
We passed it forward.
And a fury. The legend of Hank.
Who the fuck is Hank?
He's the best one.
He's got paws of the Paws of Furious.
Is this like a Beethoven spin off or an air but spin off?
Is it a spin off from the dog that Air Bud had to fight in the boxing movie?
I would watch that as a boxing bud.
No, I think dog fighting would be strictly prohibited in the Air Bud franchise.
That's the one sport that they're just like, we're not going to touch.
But moves in with Michael Fitz.
Um, what were you getting?
Michael Vick is like the Don King character of the movie.
You're going to be a champ.
Ruh roh.
Do we have to turn back time?
And that would be a great segue.
That would be a good segue.
Quotes. Yeah, I got quotes.
Fucking quotes of the yin yang.
I was going to say that
it's my quotes just like right there at the end after Nick Cage, like
meets up with Sarah Jessica Parker again.
And Sarah Michelle Geller.
No, you got it right.
Fuck. OK.
I panicked.
I panicked because this is all live and it couldn't possibly be reedited.
There's so much pressure.
I'm doubling every fuck up.
OK, so they're in each other's arms and like he's dressed like an Elvis.
And she's dressed like a showgirl.
He's like his kid said you were going to get married.
Did you get a job here?
Why is the line I'm going to use every time I go gambling now?
And he's this is after I was going to say, sir, Michelle Geller,
Sarah Jessica Parker goes on the intro date with GamesCon,
and he somehow has lots of cash still to go play roulette.
And he sits down at the table and he says,
it's extremely important that I win.
And for some reason, the woman manning the roulette table
takes him somewhat seriously and gives him a respectful answer.
Mine's like from very early on in the film, and it's him talking about a dream.
Talking to Sarah. God damn it.
Jessica Parker about he had that dream about his mom again.
And she's like, was she naked in this one?
Hey, I only had one dream where she was naked.
She was vacuuming.
Wasn't sexual. It was about cleanliness.
I love that one.
That that comes back again at the end of the movie, too, which is great.
He's like, I had another dream about my mom.
I told her we were getting married.
And she's like, was she naked?
She was still naked, but it was OK.
So instead of good cage, bad cage, because this isn't a great film
and he's not the best in it.
I want to know how long do you give that marriage?
I give it a year. Two tops.
Hmm. No, I think they're so dysfunctional.
They'll stay together for a long time and just be somewhat miserable.
Oh, they're going to have kids immediately.
So you're it's the kids that will link them together in sadness and copy it.
I don't know.
It wasn't a great performance by cage and it wasn't.
It's not a top five movie for me now, but
did I enjoy myself all the way through?
Yes, I did enjoy.
Did I laugh while I watched it? Yes, I did laugh.
Do I think that it deserves to be a part of this podcast?
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
To get to this. Yeah, there there is a lot.
I mean, we've moved all sorts of Bangkok.
Dangerous made it into this somehow.
They really could have cut like a third of the movie. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, that's what I thought.
Give me a nice 60 minute movie. Yeah.
Here's the thing.
I don't feel like I'm appropriately equipped to talk about romantic comedies.
I mean, they're just not something I like.
Yeah, well, I mean, it's gone.
Throws a lot of romance around, but it's always creepy.
Yeah. And it's creepy.
I know there's never a sweet touching moment in this movie.
Now. No.
Hey, Nick, I got a question for you.
If I could turn back time, I was going to ask if you believe in life after love.
Do you believe in love after love?
Because that's what this next movie is kind of about.
Yeah. Yeah.
I read. That's my segue.
I've read so many interviews from Cher this week.
Like, I just got addicted to reading interviews by Cher.
Awesome. With Cher for no reason.
And none of them really amount to anything in my head.
They're all the same.
Talks about shoes.
That's because people only want to ask her questions about her, like
weird boyfriends, her fashion style and things like that.
I'm just going to put it out there.
But Cher is highly underrated.
Oh, I really love Cher in sometimes ironic, sometimes not ironically.
Yeah, I never really got the Cher appeal.
And then I saw this movie like Cher's charming as fuck.
Yeah. You want you want to marry her?
You want to be her friend?
Which is funny, because this movie is nothing Cher.
No, she's very unsure.
Well, she's an Armenian woman.
Armenian, Native American, a bunch of other things, not Italian at all.
This movie is aggressively Italian.
It is very aggressive.
And he's trance and thieves.
Oh, man, when she said Nick Cage looked at her with those gypsy eyes
and I was just like, ooh, spicy.
Can't say that anymore.
I mean, I'm going to say it on the podcast because it's a freebie.
Yeah, that's true. It was in is a quote from the movie.
I take I take every freebie I can.
I always I always think that Swede sounds like a slur.
Swede. Yeah.
Swede. Swede.
Say the whole word.
Did you ever watch the show Iron Horses or something like that?
I don't know.
But there was one like work boss who was Swedish
and they just called him the Swede and he was a real son of a bitch.
Was it just wings with the with trains?
Yeah, I've never seen.
Was Tony Shalhoub in it?
Tony Shalhoub was every character, including the Swede,
which was the most racist part.
All right.
So let's follow the tradition of Moonstruck.
And drink champagne with a sugar cube dropped into it to ward off the devil.
Yeah, because he's a fucker.
The devil can't.
So when we started watching this, Josie was like,
why do why are they putting sugar cubes in their champagne?
Like if they wanted it sweeter, why not just buy a Spamante instead of fruit?
I don't know the champagne terms.
Drink a drink of wine time.
And so I had to look it up.
But it is specifically like an Italian or Italian American,
like old wives tale to drop a sugar cube in your champagne
because the devil hates all good things and nice things.
So having like that little bit of extra sweetness
keeps the devil out of your spirits.
But it also, from a scientific standpoint,
gives it more surface area for effervescence.
So it bubbles more aggressively for longer out of the sugar cube,
which is nice if you like the bubbles.
Science, science pod.
Mr. Wizard, show me your dick.
Sorry, I couldn't let it get too serious.
Sorry, Marissa, you're excluded from that one.
That's why we put Mentos in the diet coke to ward off the devil.
And for effervescence.
Oh, is it Mentos?
I've been doing pimentos this whole time and I've always been curious.
My diet coke tastes terrible.
Oh, man. So Moonstra.
Obviously, we're talking about Moonstruck.
Starring Cher mostly Cher. Yeah.
Yeah. Sure.
Loretta Castorini, Nick Cage's Ronnie Camareri
and Danny Ayo as Johnny Camareri.
Ronnie and Johnny Brothers.
And then a bunch of other great actors.
Yeah. I mean, Olympia Dukakis is Cher's mom.
It's only 15 years older than her.
Vincent Gardena. Great name is her dad.
Frazier's dad's in this. Frazier's dad, John Mahoney.
Yeah. And the grandpa, I'm sure he's an interesting actor.
You know what else John Mahoney was on?
The best show ever.
That's right. Burn Notice.
Oh, my God.
Why does it always come back to Burn Notice?
I love Burn Notice. Obviously.
That's going to be my next podcast.
I say mine because I know you two won't have anything to do with it.
So it will be self-produced.
I'll come on your podcast. Nice.
I did watch a lot of USA shows. I love you.
I mean, I just want to do a whole podcast about USA television.
It was a golden era. Yeah.
So Moonstruck. Yeah. Moonstruck.
A fucking banger of a film. 1987.
It's a great. Yeah.
So Cher Loretta is proposed to by Johnny.
And she has to work him through the whole process.
He's a real lump of a man.
Oh, he's a fucking rube. If I ever saw.
He's a putz. He's a total putz.
Rube putz. He's a he's a dumb dumb.
He nice hand motion.
He proposes because his mom's dying and he has to go back to Sicily
to be at his mom's side as she dies.
We only get like five minutes of him and Cher together in this film.
And the entire time, all she does is take care of him.
Well, yeah, she buys him gum for the plane.
You know, she tells him to wear a hat when he's out in the sun.
He's a big. I mean, he goes to order the fish at the restaurant.
That's what you say. You can't eat the fish.
It's going to be too greasy.
It's going to sit in your stomach and you're going to fly like that.
That's the subtext is mama's dying. He needs another mother.
Yeah, for sure. And to be fair, strong Italian woman.
She's going to tell you what you're going to do and what what's on her mind.
Well, she's reticent because her last husband died, got hit by a bus,
which was bad luck, which is bad luck.
I would say so. It's about as bad as it can get.
I don't know. Well, she's alive. Yeah.
But she coaches him through it. Yeah. Takes him in.
When she sees him off at the airport, because this movie also has a very
unhinged person at the airport because she's just watching the plane fly off.
And this old Italian woman's like, you know, someone on that plane.
And she's like, yeah, my fiance.
I put a curse on that plane.
Yeah, I love that old lady.
He talks about how like my sister stole my man just to be a bitch.
Yeah. And that admitted to me, just admitted to me that she never loved him.
She just wanted to be better than me.
So I curse her and share just goes, I don't believe in curses.
Hold on. I want to back one thing up.
So when I mildly touched on Pat Marita's accent,
I was racist. Italians aren't people. OK.
As long as we've got that out in front.
So continue. The sweet.
Now, like we said, this movie is aggressively Italian.
There's one character. Very Italian.
There's one. There's one.
We're all just gesticulating wildly.
There's one character near her grandfather who most of his lines
are just in Italian.
And he's talking to a Russian actor. Yeah.
He's like, OK, so hold on.
I want to talk about this.
Since we're just on the grandpa right now, I he's my favorite character.
Oh, he has the best.
He has the best joke in the whole movie.
But the best part about him is like not even like on screen.
It's the fact that the actor himself is he's 140 now fucking blind.
So he couldn't really see anything, couldn't hear anybody.
He was deaf and he would watch other people.
And this is how he would get his cues when they would stop talking.
That's when he knew they were done.
So it was his turn.
So their mouth stopped moving.
And then he would just say his line, no clue what they said.
Anything like that.
Just old deaf Russian dude.
That's awesome.
Owning this Italian grandpa role.
I appreciated the dogs.
Yeah. He has like five dogs that are just his.
Oh, the best dog scene is when he comes back the first time
and the dogs go to go up the stairs and that one dog.
This is the stair.
Just takes a header into the stairs.
So good. Like he feeds.
He feeds his daughter in law's food to the dog.
Like we'll scoot.
Like we'll have food served to him.
Then he just gets up, walks it over and just hands it to the dogs.
Yeah, it gets back down.
And then his son, she's like, my dad needs another plate. Yeah.
The best line is what Olympia Dukakis says to the grandpa.
Yeah. After the he say she's like,
if you if you give my food to those dogs one more time,
I'm going to kick you to death. Yes.
She is my favorite character in this movie.
Yeah, she's great.
I loved when the grandpa was meeting with all of his old dude friends
at the like cemetery around the grave of one person
that had all these flowers and stuff.
But he's got all of his dogs and they're like kicking up dirt and stuff.
Or does he leave? Yeah.
Nobody gives a shit.
It's just like they have an old dude conference.
And then like he says, I need to make sure my son pays for the wedding.
It's disrespectful if he doesn't pay for this wedding.
Yeah. Sure. Comes home, tells them, tells her father that she's getting married.
What again? Yeah.
And they have a little fight about it.
He doesn't like Johnny.
I don't like John. I don't know.
Johnny said he does.
So it's like, all right, let's go wake up your mother.
Go upstairs. Wake up, mom.
Loretta's getting married.
What again?
I do love the line.
Do you love him? No, ma. Good.
Because if you love them, they know you can get away.
They can get away with anything.
Do you like him? I do, ma. Good.
I like in the end when she's with Ronnie and it's like, do you love him?
I do. I do, ma. Oh, God help us.
This is a great these movies are great because we saw the first
we saw Nick Cage's first marriage that went wrong.
Now we see a second marriage. Perfect. Yeah.
That's the connecting tissue for this one.
And Cacoldry. Yeah. Cacoldry.
Yeah, Peter. Come on.
What? What the fuck?
I said, right. Cacoldry.
So the main point of this film is Johnny is like his one ask for Loretta
was like, you got to get my you got to get my brother.
We haven't spoken in five years. He works at this bread job.
You got to call him up and like, get him.
Nick Cage.
So she goes to meet him and he's shoveling coal into an oven and he's sweaty.
Sweaty. Peter.
He's got those fucked up teeth that make him look like a human being.
Yeah. So I did want to talk about this.
I talked about it with Peter a little bit.
Nick Cage has never been like attractive.
Yes. Like he's never been horribly attractive.
But before he got the veneers and his teeth were fucked up,
his face had like class and character.
And I like I would see him and like I see his like cute little boy smile.
I'm like, I get it.
Well, it's just the I said this earlier.
This is the only film I've ever seen him in where he's like remotely attractive
because he's got a sort of animal presence about him.
He's a wolf. And he got to see Birdie.
He actually acts in this.
And so you feel you feel the the passion he has for share.
Like he actually communicates that.
So the studio did not like him for this role and did not want him in this.
Correct. Like she he did us did a screen test with Cher.
I can't remember who the other like front runner was,
but the studio was like, no, he's bad. We don't like him.
And Cher was like, no, he's the only one who's going to pull off crazy.
I want him. And they're like, no.
And she's like, cool. I quit.
And they're like, all right, he can be in the movie.
Go share. Yeah. Fucking power play.
I know. I guess when you have one name, you can do what you want.
That's right. To be fair.
To be fair. Yeah, I know.
I almost said that to be share. To be fair.
The studio continued to try to sleep on this movie.
And after it was done, they're like, this movie sucks.
We're going to release it in two theaters.
And they put it out in two theaters.
But Goldie Hawn's Overboard
is what they were putting all their money on.
And that movie bombed.
And so they're like, fuck, I guess we better release
more of this Moonstruck movie.
And it went to like many theaters.
Like it just multiplexed right out because people loved it.
And that's how that got.
Well, even shares like in an interview while making the film was like,
this isn't a good movie.
She did not think she did a good job.
She didn't think the movie was great.
Want an Oscar for it. Yeah.
Cher also didn't watch Daly's.
So she doesn't really know whether it was a good movie or not.
She's on the record in an interview saying that she wouldn't watch Daly's.
Good. I mean, I hate to do that.
I wouldn't either.
I don't know.
So she goes and meets Ronnie,
who hates his brother for a slight from years prior.
Ronnie blames Johnny for the loss of his hand and his bride or a slice.
Hey, and we're back.
Apparently, Johnny, like called out to him while he was slicing bread
on the slicer and he looked away and his hand got caught in there, got mangled.
And when he went home to his to his fiance, she left him for another man.
A man with two hands. Yeah.
I'm just going to say my I'm just going to say my quote now.
Cher goes to like invite him to the wedding.
He's pointing at his like wooden hand.
It's kind of a sweet prosthetic. Yeah.
It was a good wooden hand.
He had some good wood. Good wood.
I know freaking monument to justice.
I lost my hand.
I lost my bride.
Johnny has his hand. Johnny has his bride.
He wants me to take my heartache, put it away and forget. Love it.
Another series of just extreme yelling every line in this film.
Yeah, he's so like melodramatic.
I mean, my quote from this is kind of from that same scene.
Chrissy over on the wall.
Bring me the big knife. I want to cut my throat. Oh, Johnny.
I love how dramatic he is about it.
Give me the big knife.
I'm a fucking kill myself right here.
Oh, Johnny, don't do it.
He's like, I will fucking kill myself.
It's going to stay for this until Johnny on your wedding night that I died.
I love that melodrama.
Yeah. Now he's spectacular.
Then she like he lives upstairs.
She takes him upstairs to like talk things out, at which point
he she makes a mistake.
She makes a mistake.
Yeah, which he wants. I like it. Well done.
Because they're all babies. Everyone's a baby.
Yeah, yeah. That that is very true.
All the men in this are just like children.
Well, I would argue that he that scene where he flips the table over
and he kisses her is where he stops being a baby. Yeah.
And he starts becoming the man. I love that.
Yeah. Well, he had a steak. Yeah.
To eat it bloody. That's true.
She made it for the blood.
She's like, I need whiskey.
So they have a sip of whiskey each, at which point he flips the table,
squares up, slicks back the hair.
Does a shake of the hips.
Yeah, my favorite part. Then he like just grabs her and kisses her
like sweeps her off her feet.
And she's like, where are we going? The bedroom.
Fine. Take me there. I don't care anymore.
She wastes no time to cheat on her fiance.
Well, it's because she actually has passionate feeling.
Yeah, I get it. This guy does something. Yeah.
No, they have. Johnny does nothing.
Johnny was afraid to kneel like he didn't want to kneel down to propose, which.
All right. I'm going to mess up his suit.
This is my suit. I know I picked it out for you.
It came with two pairs of pants.
That's a nice suit.
But I want to also circle back here.
Nick Cage does not kneel down now in the end of the movie. It's true.
He just says like straight up while standing on very me.
But he does it in front of her whole family. That's fair.
It's been less than 48 hours since she's gotten engaged,
slept with her fiance's brother, goes to the church to confess.
It's been at least a week since the engagement.
They talk about on the phone.
We talk about that.
Insinuation of the past.
Yeah. With the mom in the back. Yeah. Yeah.
She's just in this.
I don't know. I have a lot of old French relatives that remind me of that.
And so the women in black at the bed.
It looks like she's in a Renaissance painting.
It's hilarious.
I do like on my phone call, though, Johnny just
is like cried his mom's bedside and she just like waves away.
She's just like, I like how quietly he's trying to talk.
Yeah, like he shushes share on the other side of the phone.
Yeah. Well, to be fair, share is kind of say that a lot.
Share is also like doing old person talk too loud on the phone.
Voice is like, oh, you're in another country.
I need to talk louder so you hear me from America.
Got to really project. Yeah.
So Cher and Ronnie sleep together.
Then the Bella Luna comes out.
The love moon. What did you guys think of the the friends of the family
who talk about the love her aunt and uncle? Yeah.
Oh, I loved their roles in the movie.
I thought they were a lot of fun.
I loved how dopey the uncle was.
I loved how kind of like flighty the aunt seemed.
They're just kind of off. They're out there.
They're a little weird, but they're like they're sweet.
Well, there are those people who are consistently in love.
Yeah. Throughout the whole film.
Yes. So every they don't have a problem.
Every I mean, it's an examination of love and couples. Right.
And so they are what you hope to be. Yeah.
And they are perhaps they even get down in this chair.
And Ronnie will be in 30 years.
Yeah. Loretta's father is cheating on her mother and the mom knows it.
His name is Cosmo. Well, she loved the name Cosmo assumes it.
Well, yeah. Short for Cosmopolitan.
Cosmo, not what?
So she lives at home with her parents.
And like, there's a couple of conversations about where she going to live.
Johnny's going to move in with them. Sure.
It's the multi generational family.
Well, like the one night she stays out when she I mean, she's cheating on her fiance.
But the one night she stays out like the mom's like,
I lied to your father and said you came home like I know she's supposed to be 37
in this movie. I can see it in the 80s.
Yeah, I was hardly alive at this time.
If in 1987, if I had been out all night,
my parents would definitely have words with me.
I wouldn't understand them. I'd be too.
But the fact of the matter is like there is a concern.
And especially if like especially as a woman. Yeah.
As a woman, I'm assuming New York plays a part in it
and just living in a multi generational family.
I didn't grow up in like a family where I had like my grandparents
and stuff living with me.
I saw my grandma naked one time.
Now it's really weird. It was weird.
I saw my grandma have a stroke.
Wow. Let's just get one up.
My grandma kept it pretty PG 13 when I was watching.
And we got there. High five.
We need to end on that joke podcast over.
Yeah, we're done.
Moonstruck wins. It's better.
OK, but I mean, these
Peter's leave in the room.
Immigrant families and stuff, you know, they bring different values, values.
Yeah. And so I also thought it was kind of gossipy.
Like, oh, definitely.
You're going to wonder where your daughter is.
Yeah. He's engaged to someone else who's in another country.
Like, where were you?
Oh, the harlotry is intense.
I do like, though. So they have sex.
She gets up at night to look at the moon, goes back to bed,
wakes up again and suddenly realizes what she's done.
Well, you know, in the middle of the night, you're still kind of like
absorbed in like the she was probably still drunk.
Yeah. Plus, there's the love moon.
Yeah. Yeah.
The Bella Luna Bell Luna.
Also, Bella Legosi is dead.
Did I ever tell you guys that I saw I got to see about house?
You did. Yeah.
No, fuck. It was at Sasquatch, maybe two thousand five.
Peter Murphy threw out a rose and I caught it and we made eye contact.
And it was love. It was love. Bella Luna.
Also, there were all these like kids that were like 14 that were there for him
because him was playing like before they opened up her bow house.
I forgot that that was a thing.
I just thought you meant for him.
Yeah. Nope.
For the band, Capital H.
I am with the weird like heart hearted heartagram heartagram.
I watched a lot. I watched some people, the BAM.
Yeah, that's mostly where I know him from.
Oh, yeah. Well, when the BAM are podcasting
when BAM Margera is in rehab now in Lamar Odom,
he owns runs a bunch of.
Oh, yeah. That's a rehabs now.
So BAM Margera is in one of Lamar Odom's rehab houses now.
I hope he does well.
But when I was there, like all these little like kids were like,
who are these guys? What are they doing?
And I was just like, you don't even know children.
You don't even understand.
God, you fucking children.
So anyway.
Uh, yeah.
Bella Luna. That was my Peter Murphy.
So Cher says it's over.
You know, it's never going to happen.
Don't come to it. I'm going to come to the wedding.
Don't come to the wedding.
So his one ask is he wants the two things he loves
at the same time to go to the opera with the woman he loves.
Can I just we just stop on that for a second? Because yes,
we don't we don't take breaks.
We don't we don't stop. We're very.
I think that like, OK, I'm going to get a little like
lit crit on you guys.
But how much more adult can you get than loving the opera?
Right. As like as a symbol for being an adult,
for being a mature human.
I low key love opera.
I did too. Thank you.
And it well, I'm a child.
It didn't come about really late because when I was in
you have the hair for it, when I was still doing my undergrad in Montana,
the only grad school that expressed interest in me
was Ohio Conservatory of Opera.
And at the time, I was way more interested in partying and stuff.
And I was like, I don't want to go to opera school for lighting.
I want to do something else.
And then maybe like 10 years later, I looked back at my portfolio
and it's like all I did like for lighting design, like I did dance stuff.
I did music stuff and shows.
So it's like, yeah, I should absolutely just be doing opera
because it's the best way to do incredible, like insane lighting
and work on like super fun things without having to like
really think about it like a musical because it's just all music.
Yeah. And it's I should have done it.
I should have gone to Ohio.
I'm shaking my head next. Great.
Regret. Yeah.
And why didn't I go to become a lighting designer for the operas?
I would not be a washed out lighting designer turned electrician.
So they both get a bit of a glow up shared.
Has, you know, a little hair montage by, you know, new dress, new shoes
meets with Nick Cage, who has a really nice suit on.
So same hair, same wild hair.
You can't tame the wolf.
Now it's pushed back.
But they go to the opera where they run into her father who's on a date.
So that's awkward.
Yeah. Cosmo with Lorna Lorna Lorna is something like that.
Yeah. OK. The actress's name is Mimi then.
And then, yeah, you know, there there's a bunch of like who's on first,
like, who's that? Who's that?
And he says he doesn't want his daughter to be what I'm assuming is Italian for whore.
Yes. Who thought it's it's whore.
Yeah. It's the same in French.
Wait, can we be a foreign language podcast?
We can. OK. Only for an Italian again.
Butana, butana. Yeah.
And in French, put on.
Yeah. Or pitas if it's a woman, actually.
So it does a man and it's asked this woman.
But that betas.
No, no, I'm talking about men.
I'm looking at Sean over here.
But they put the T.A.
Poutine put put down whore.
Sex worker, sir.
Um, he's eating it nice. Yes.
Well, this is going on.
One of my favorite scenes is when Loretta's mom goes to have dinner alone
at the same Italian restaurant where Loretta got engaged or proposed to.
Can we talk about Bobo?
Oh, yeah, we can talk about Bobo.
Bobo is one of the servers here at this restaurant, and he is incredibly like
he is. He's a simple man.
Igor, he's an Igor.
Yeah. Like he is Dr. Frankenstein's Igor.
He's just like, oh, yes, yes, yes.
Oh, I'll set your table for you, Mrs.
I've got the champagne.
But like so she winds up having dinner with
John Mahoney because they're both eating alone now, where she has my favorite
line of the film, which is, you know, let me give you some advice.
My mom gave me don't shit where you eat.
Yeah, because he's a college professor who's dating his students.
Yeah. And he she approaches it so well, too, like as if it's some old wives
like sage tale.
It's like don't shit where you eat. Yeah.
No, she is my favorite character in this movie.
One hundred percent. She fucking rules.
And great performance all the way through.
And then Mahoney tries to like take her home.
Oh, he he tries hard. Yeah.
He does a great job of being a charming person.
Yeah. Up until he becomes kind of the sex pest.
He he credits this film with getting him like kind of known.
And what's the point of him, though?
So we have the mom and dad who are having marriage problems.
We have the aunt and uncle who are, you know, that happy married couple
that have been together.
Being in love and in a relationship is the ideal state.
Yeah. And he is sort of the warning of especially for men.
Yeah. Right. If they don't do that, this is like happens to you.
He's never been in love.
He's bored and jaded with life.
Like he says, you know, it's not that it's not that he's attracted to the whip,
the young women as much as it is like he's been doing his job for so long
now that he has no passion for it anymore.
But he sees a young face and sees someone who is passionate about something
he used to be and he just wants to be near that for a while.
And it's the whole fear of death thing that she keeps going on about.
I do. I mean, it's this fear of irrelevance, which is death for him.
Yeah. So what's what's interesting, the fear of death thing comes up
a lot with Olivia Dukakis's character.
And then what's funny to me is when Johnny does come back,
he's the only one who says it. Yeah.
Outright. Yeah.
She has my other great line is Olympia Dukakis.
When Cosmo comes back home that night from the opera, Johnny's there.
Johnny's back from Sicily.
His mom's made a miraculous recovery.
But Cosmo comes back in and she's like, Where have you been?
It's like, I don't know where I've been.
He just like blows her off.
He's like, I don't know where I've been.
I don't know where I'm going.
And she just looks at him and goes, Cosmo,
you're going to die one day just like the rest of us.
Yeah. She's amazing.
Saying the quiet part out loud.
That was great.
Also, I do love Cosmo's reaction as he comes in.
Just be like, I don't know where I've been.
I don't know where I'm going.
I don't I don't know when it is.
It's like, I don't know why.
Johnny's come back.
Their mother's made a miraculous recovery.
He needs to talk to Loretta right now, but she's out.
No one knows where she's at.
She comes home the next day, has a love bite.
Johnny's on his way.
That's a hickey for people.
No, they both do. Yeah, they both do.
Yeah. No, she's like she's like you.
Like, you know, she's like Johnny's going to.
I was like, What? And her hair still kind of like done up.
And she's like frantically trying to like dress down.
She's like, You have a love bite. Cover that up.
Doorbell rings.
Mago's to answer it. It's it's Ronnie.
I also like that this is the second time that shared
does a costume change in a closet.
Yes, that's true.
Like in Nick Cage's apartment and then now this here.
So this is the scene that I think most people know from this film.
So it's Ronnie. Nick Cage comes in and Dukakis is like,
Oh, well, you want some breakfast?
And shares like, No, he doesn't.
Nick Cage is just like, Yes, Mrs.
Castorini, I would love some oatmeal.
So just such a dumb.
But it's like shares like, No, he's not saying he's going.
And he's like, Yes, I would love some oatmeal, please.
So there's so they sit down at the table awkwardly waiting for Johnny to show up.
It's such an awkward breakfast.
And then the dad comes down and is like, What's going on here?
And like gets introduced to Ronnie finally, like officially.
Grandpa comes down.
Doorbell rings again. Everyone's nervous.
It's the aunt and uncle.
So now they're there. They're all having coffee.
And then the last doorbell is Johnny coming in,
who, guess what, wants to call off the marriage because his mom,
his mom had a miraculous recovery.
And if they get married, she'll die. Yeah.
Superstition runs throughout this entire thing.
Yeah. He told mom that she was or that they're going to get married.
She recovered.
And he's like, Oh, we can't get married now because it'll kill her.
Yeah. And then she gets a weird jump to make.
Then she gets so pissed off because like, you know, you said we were going to get
married, like she doesn't want to marry this guy, but she's just like,
that was a promise.
Because if we learned anything from Tommy Corman, nobody backs out on it.
So he wants his ring back, which is which is his pinky ring.
Yeah. And then, you know, you guys should all start wearing pinkie rings.
I think it's just I've been looking for a pinky ring.
I'm looking for a really good one, actually.
And then Nick Cage just goes, Oh, Maria.
Yeah. So where's the ring?
And he's just like, Johnny.
So he takes Johnny's pinky ring and proposes.
And then, yeah.
And then that's pretty much the end of the film.
They're all having champagne with sugar cubes.
Yeah. Don't forget the scene where Olympia Dukakis confronts Cosmo.
Oh, yes.
Because that that's
as powerful. Yeah.
He says, What do I have to show for my life?
And everything he has to show is right around.
Yeah. You know, and she reminds me of that.
She calls him out for that.
I love that she's like Cosmo.
You have to stop seeing this other person.
And then he like just there's a pause and he stands up,
smacks his hand down on the table, stands there for a second,
sits back down and just says, OK, that's a good way to take it.
Oh, wait.
He knows he's beat.
There's nothing else for him to do.
Guys. Best joke is in the scene.
It's before Johnny shows up.
And it's just the whole family's around the table
and everyone just awkwardly waiting for the doorbell to ring.
And Grandpa just goes, Someone tell a joke.
My favorite grandpa line is after that, even when everything's like done,
everybody's like, you know, getting married and he's just sitting there
crying and they're like, what's wrong?
He's like, I'm so confused.
That was my favorite part. Yeah.
So and then this movie ends like all great adult documentaries
with a knife fight with like all great adult documents
fight with the chubby guy who's been cuckolded is just sitting in the corner
watching. Oh, I love the family photo that they show during the credits.
It's so awkward, too, because like, why is Johnny in that photo?
It's like obviously they got up from breakfast
and they took an engagement photo with everybody that was there.
And like, Grandpa's there.
But Johnny's just standing like in the middle, weirdly by himself.
Got to be part of the family.
So what do we think of Nick Cage's performance in this?
The Italian accent. Where do we land on that Italian American accent?
Yeah. Actually, I grew I knew people like that in New York.
So I would say, yeah, you're the it's not bad.
It's a little like some of the his one was OK.
Some of the other people's Italians were a little too Italian for me.
Well, here's the thing about it.
Aggressively Italian. Yeah.
The aunt that like barely had much in it was the dialect coach
and hand coach for basically every non coach.
I love that there's a hand coach.
Yeah, they taught people like shares.
You can tell I've got a quote from where she's talking about like learning.
It was a good hand.
The guy who played Johnny was like teaching her how to say things like theater.
It's like you're going to go to the theater, but it's not.
I'm going to go to the theater.
It's the theater.
There's a hand motion that you are presented.
It's like it's the theater.
The aunt taught Cher Dukakis
and one of the other people who has zero Italian in them.
How to use this accent of the dialect.
And then also like just did hand talk coaching
and taught them how to like be Italian.
I thought Nick Cage was good in this movie.
Oh, I think he's very good.
I thought you could really see the change.
There's like it's like there's before Cher and after Cher. Right.
And so he's definitely a different.
He said, and he does that well.
And like I said, I actually found him attract.
Like that's saying something.
I do not find him attractive. Hardly ever.
There's not a lot here.
I find few occasions where I don't find him attractive now.
But to be fair, I see him more than I see my girlfriend. So
did we do a quote for you?
Well, his hip movement was the quote.
Oh, that's true.
Yeah, really?
I mean, those hips could talk.
Those hips don't lie.
To be honest, he doesn't have the quotes in this film.
Now, this is a share.
He's almost like a straight man in a comedy.
Yeah. Everybody's playing off of him.
But he's the one who's the most like acts the most unhinged.
Well, he does have the biggest crazy moments. Yeah.
And he's very obviously very good at that.
And very early in his career, this is only like his 10th movie or something.
Yeah, something like that.
So where do you guys put it in the good cage?
Bad movie, bad cage, good movie, good cage, good movie.
Yeah, good cage, good movie.
This is a good cage, good movie. Yeah.
And I've got a quote from an interview here from Nick Cage,
just discussing why he did Moonstruck.
One of the reasons I did Moonstruck was because I thought it would allow me
to take more of a chance with my next film,
which is a low budget black comedy called Vampire's Kiss
that hardly has mass commercial appeal written all over it.
He said, I play a man who thinks who's insane and thinks he's a vampire.
Everyone told me not to do it,
but the script grabbed me by the collar and screamed,
if you don't do this movie, you're a coward.
I figured that in order to succeed in the film business,
you can't be afraid to roll the dice.
And as long as I'm betting, I want to bet everything I've got.
So he only did this so he could do Vampire's Kiss, which I think is great.
Yeah, that's astounding. Vampire's Kiss is well,
it's it's the movie that really rocketed him into insanity.
Yes, it developed the character of a cage. Yeah. So Nick Moonstruck.
Yeah. Yeah.
It was a real tight one for me.
They're both fun. They're both very enjoyable.
I for me, I think it's Moonstruck's just going to
I'm going to enjoy watching that again.
Yeah. Putting two romantic comedies against each other,
I think is good in my world because I would usually be biased
against the romantic comedy.
I think we talked about this with It Could Happen to You.
It's not really my bag, but this was done well,
just like It Could Happen to You was done well. Yeah. And same director.
It's fun. It's a real ensemble piece.
It's so Nick Cage isn't like prevalent in it.
If I had to like base it on how much Nick Cage you get,
he's more involved in the other movie.
But he's not better in the other movie.
No, this is the better movie.
Better performance, better performance.
Weirder. This is I mean, he's a one handed Nicolas Cage.
Yeah, he lost his head.
It's he lost his bride.
It's a weird movie. Yeah.
Oh, the the scene where Cher slaps him
and she's just like, slap out or snap out of it.
Nick Cage had people coming up to him for like years after this movie.
And they'd be like, snap out of it.
But some people would also slap him.
She also slaps the shit out of him that second time.
Well, yeah, she slaps him twice.
But Nick Cage is like, I don't know why people think that they can just come up
to me and slap me and say snap out of it.
Maybe they think I'm going to get them a role in something, but I can't.
Real quick.
There is some this weekend, K or cage news.
We haven't done that in a while.
The trailer for sympathy for the devil came out.
Yes. That looks astounding.
I'm real excited for that.
Also today, a gameplay trailer dropped for the Nicholas Cage,
Dead by Daylight DLC, where you do get to play as Nicholas Cage.
Running away from movie monsters.
Oh, nice.
You can see the one running away.
I was hoping the cage was going to be the monster.
Both would be good, but I kind of want.
I hope there's good like Nick Cage lines like while he's running away,
like I just can't figure out why this is happening to me.
I'm pretty sure he didn't record any lines for this.
They're just using lines of his and the model pretty bad face scan.
The model of the Nick Cage model is truly not good.
Yeah. Oh, just in terms of like things that Nick Cage normally doesn't do.
I found out that his first role was in a television series.
He didn't tell anybody when he got started.
He just got a like part in this one TV show that didn't make it.
And then he made three films with his uncle.
I think it's good he changed his name. Yeah.
Oh, for sure. I think it was only like one movie where he was.
Nick Coppola. That was just fast.
I mean, talk about NEPO, baby.
So he got away from that. Yeah.
Anything else you want to say?
No, I mean, so next up, we've got Lord of War and Captain Corelli's mandolin.
So who do you have as guests on that?
Just us. Do you want to come back?
I don't know if I want to watch this movie.
We don't either.
Yeah. Also, get ready for some really good, quote unquote accent work.
I don't think that's allowed on this podcast.
Apparently, it becomes racist immediately.
Yeah, exactly.
So we're going to do it.
Oh, actually, this is something I wanted to talk about.
CIF is doing a David Lynch series this summer, starting up very soon.
I love David Wild at Heart is going to be playing at the Egyptian
three different nights.
I'm going on July 3rd.
And anybody also going on July 3rd
see David Lynch's Wild at Heart in theaters.
I'm there. It's like two weeks before we record for the episode.
So it would be a great time to like get together.
If any of any of our like patrons or anything or whatever patrons.
Really have a tree. Yeah.
We'll talk about them right now. Yeah.
Who's our let's let's give thanks to our thanks to our sparkle buddies on Patreon.
Josh, Sean, Josie, Rico, Matt and Adam and our cage dancers,
Ira, John and Freeman.
Yeah, big ups.
We're doing shit here, Marissa.
This isn't just something we do in Peter's basement.
It's not just something we do in Peter's basement.
Sometimes we do it in Sean's apartment, too.
Yeah, we've got options.
Thanks to your support.
We can afford the gas to move our cast materials.
Anyway, thanks, everyone, for listening.
And remember, good night and good cacauldry.
Yeah. And thanks to our guest. Oh, yeah.
Marissa, did you have anything you wanted to plug?
I don't that's really weird when people don't expect
I know to ask them if they have anything you want to plug,
because we got all sorts of pine cones and like dirt and stuff outside.
I hear that's how bears do it.
They just eat a bunch of pine cones and dirt and then they hibernate.
I'm very they plug it up.
And that's that.
But you called her by
the cold tree, the cold tree.
And then the.
Five.
That's because you're drinking diet coke with baloney in it.
Pimento log.
Bologna. Mm hmm.
This is a fine. Can you imagine slurping?
I'm just going to keep talking about this.
Slurping some champagne through a baloney straw.
Like if you just cored out a piece of baloney and like,
oh, drink some grape juice through it.
Just bubbly, meaty juices in your mouth.
Segway out of this one, Sean.
Talk about God help us.
Now keep going. This is this gold podcast gold.
Yeah, but I am very bad with money.
The people at home who don't know me, like I like to just spend money on jokes.
I prefer it that way.
I don't I don't need a lot of things, but I have a lot of things at home
that are one off jokes and it would have been another Elvis suit.
And another. Yeah, we're not going to approach that.
I was going to say, I feel like that's highly reusable.
I would use it all the time.
Yeah, but you need like skinny Elvis and fat Elvis.
And this part of my life, I'm in a fat Elvis phase.
Well, you just need zippers on the side, right? To let it out.
That really that really irked me for some reason.
You can't tell me that something irks you because I'm going to latch onto it
and I'm going to fucking you're going to get a bunch of weird letters from Nick now.
Yeah, that's all you're going to get slipped on your door.
Remy's going to go wild.
That's their dog.
Sorry, dog.
I'm out and you hard.