1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:11,080 One of life's greatest questions is what happens to us after we die. 2 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:14,160 Is death the end or a new beginning? 3 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:16,600 Welcome to the Round Trip Death Podcast. 4 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:21,000 In this show we listen to first hand accounts of people who have been clinically dead and 5 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:28,080 return to talk about it. 6 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:35,320 We'd like to welcome to the show today Kathy McDaniel and Kathy has had an amazing NDE 7 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:37,320 that we're going to be talking about. 8 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:46,040 She also is an author with a book out called Misfit in Hell to Heaven Expat. 9 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:48,240 Oh my goodness, that is a mouthful. 10 00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:51,960 Why don't you say it for me so it'll sound better. 11 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:55,280 Misfit in Hell to Heaven Expat. 12 00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:57,960 Okay, very good. 13 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:05,080 Now for everybody out there that's assuming this is going to be a regular story where 14 00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:14,040 somebody has a health problem and their heart stops and they go through this tunnel to the 15 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:17,960 white light and everything's peachy and rosy. 16 00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:19,960 This might be a little bit different today. 17 00:01:19,960 --> 00:01:21,960 So you've been warned up front. 18 00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,600 Before we get to that, tell us just a little bit about you. 19 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:31,200 A little bit about the, all right, my dad was in the Navy and we traveled a lot. 20 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:39,520 So I was always a new kid and we finally ended up in a beach town in California where we 21 00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:42,280 lived for 35 years and I loved it. 22 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:47,840 Went to high school, had a business, I was a property manager, had a really good friend 23 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:55,440 that called me up when we were both in our early 50s and said, I've got leukemia. 24 00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:57,120 I've got to go to Seattle. 25 00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:02,480 I need two caregivers to go through this research hospital. 26 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:04,000 Would you help me? 27 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:07,400 And I said, sure, you betcha. 28 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:14,080 So I went to Seattle, found this a place and he came up and they told us it'd be two, 29 00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:20,840 three months, but it turned into almost nine months and it was a lot of trauma. 30 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:25,360 I mean, he was in and out of the hospital into the apartment and then he'd be doing 31 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:30,000 really good and then wake up in the middle of the night and his nose is bleeding uncontrollably 32 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:33,120 and we were not nurses. 33 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:39,200 We were just 50 year old people and so the other lady and I were getting pretty run down 34 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:41,880 and then she broke her foot and she's on crutches. 35 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:46,080 So now I'm taking care of both of them and we had to scour the house every night and 36 00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:47,080 all this stuff. 37 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:51,720 So he died and it just absolutely blew me away. 38 00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:52,960 I had no idea. 39 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:59,400 I mean, no, it just wasn't meant to be, but he was gone and I got sick. 40 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:06,880 I got a flu that was going around and it really, it hit me hard and by the time I got to a 41 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:13,120 dock in the box, a friend drove me down there, I had no pulse and the last thing I remember 42 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:18,960 was saying in a whisper when I thought I was shouting, I'm dying, I'm dying. 43 00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:23,320 And then I woke up in the emergency room. 44 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,320 They got me in an oxygen tent. 45 00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:28,120 My parents are up from California. 46 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:32,520 My daughter is out from Colorado and I'm thinking, oh, something's amiss here. 47 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:34,240 And they said, no, you are really sick. 48 00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:38,480 You've got something called ARDS, acute respiratory distress syndrome. 49 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:39,680 It's called lung failure. 50 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:43,160 It's usually what kills people in SARS or COVID or whatever. 51 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:47,840 It's the last, last place you go before you get pushed off the cliff. 52 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:52,640 So they said we got about a 38% chance of saving you. 53 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,560 We're going to have to put you in a drug and do this coma. 54 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:57,360 We're going to do things you don't want to know about. 55 00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:02,240 We're going to give you white amnesia and it will make it physically impossible for 56 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:04,720 you to remember anything that happens to you. 57 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,280 Are you ready? 58 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:09,520 Did they actually tell you that percent back then? 59 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:10,520 Yeah. 60 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:11,520 Ooh. 61 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:17,800 I mean, that's why, because I was saying, you know, coma, oh, my insurance company, 62 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:20,080 you know, all this stuff, you know, and we'll take her home. 63 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:23,680 We'll take her, you know, no, she's not going anywhere. 64 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:28,240 But is that depressing and makes you want to give up or does it make you go, oh, I can 65 00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:29,240 beat those odds? 66 00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:30,240 That's no problem. 67 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:32,960 I didn't have time to think about it. 68 00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:35,520 They were getting ready to turn on the gas, man. 69 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:38,240 And I thought, okay. 70 00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:43,080 And I remember last thing it was the ball was coming down for New Year's Eve, 1999, 71 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,080 turning into 2000. 72 00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:47,280 It was a momentous event for me. 73 00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:52,400 And my dad's at the window of my hospital room, give me a thumbs up and it all went 74 00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:54,600 black. 75 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:58,000 So there I was. 76 00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:00,240 And all of a sudden I was conscious. 77 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:01,240 I was awake. 78 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:02,720 It was pitch black. 79 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,560 And there was no sound. 80 00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:07,280 And I thought, what's going on? 81 00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:09,680 You know, it was like somebody put me in a closet for a joke. 82 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:13,920 And I thought, well, I can't even move because I don't know if I'm sitting on something or 83 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:15,720 if I'm laying down or what. 84 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:18,360 I just have to wait it out. 85 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:22,760 So of course later on, I figured I found out I was in the void. 86 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:25,840 That's a very special place to be. 87 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:30,200 But then all of a sudden it got a reddish glow kind of happening there. 88 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:32,040 And I thought, oh, well, the sun's coming up. 89 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,040 This is good. 90 00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:35,640 You know, I can see where that devil I am. 91 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:41,760 And as it got brighter, there was the fog rolled in and it was all reddish and it started 92 00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:44,600 getting a little uncomfortably warm. 93 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:46,960 And I smelled something really bad. 94 00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:49,160 I thought, where am I? 95 00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:55,320 And then out of the fog came this voice that almost knocked me backwards that just said, 96 00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:57,960 do you know where you are? 97 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:00,120 Was it all creepy like that? 98 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:02,640 It was all creepy like that. 99 00:06:02,640 --> 00:06:06,800 And I thought, wow, I can only come up with one answer here. 100 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:07,800 I hope I'm wrong. 101 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:09,800 I said, hell. 102 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:15,600 And then the thought voice just went, whoa, like really mean, expletive. 103 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:19,720 I got up and I ran to the left into the darkness. 104 00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:21,720 I didn't care if I ran into a door. 105 00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:23,560 If I fell on a hole, nothing. 106 00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:26,800 I had to get away from whatever that was. 107 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:31,320 So that was the beginning of my adventure. 108 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,200 I never felt dead. 109 00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,200 You know, I'm still me. 110 00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:37,200 I'm still me. 111 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:41,000 It's just like your body's a car, you know, and you're driving around, you get out of 112 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,960 the car, but it's you're still you. 113 00:06:42,960 --> 00:06:43,960 You're not your car. 114 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,800 Well, you're not your body. 115 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:53,520 So anyway, I found that the lights would come up and I would be in a situation. 116 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:57,920 Always a shock. 117 00:06:57,920 --> 00:06:59,480 It was later on, Eric. 118 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:04,120 In fact, it was like two or three months ago that I talked to somebody who's had a couple 119 00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:07,280 of end years that had distressing ones on there. 120 00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:09,440 And they all three said they had segments. 121 00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:11,280 And I find that very interesting. 122 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:13,760 But then later on, I figured out why. 123 00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:15,600 What do you mean by segments? 124 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:17,320 It was like a movie set. 125 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:23,480 The first one was the lights came up and I'm in like New York City that's just been bombed. 126 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:26,360 And there's fires and the windows are blown out. 127 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:27,360 There's glass everywhere. 128 00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:32,840 There's big chunks of concrete with rebar sticking out of them and screaming and people 129 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:39,600 moaning and just all of a sudden, you know, you just walk into that and fight or flight. 130 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:43,600 I went looking for a place to hide so I could get my bearings. 131 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,840 You know, what happened? 132 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:52,520 A little later, I kind of saw from the distance some other person. 133 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:56,960 Mark huddled over behind a rock and I just yelled out. 134 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,960 I thought, well, I'm giving away my my position here. 135 00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:03,400 This is probably a dangerous thing to do if they're soldiers or anything. 136 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,000 But I thought, I've got to get some help. 137 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,480 So I just yelled out, hey, I'm over here. 138 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:10,720 You know, maybe we could get together, you know, look for water or food. 139 00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:17,360 And and I waited for a reply and came this for lower and voice that said, we are all 140 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:20,440 alone here. 141 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,080 I thought here, what? 142 00:08:23,080 --> 00:08:30,000 And then I heard this like scuttling sound of metal on rock and I tucked back into my 143 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:37,480 hiding place and the shadow went by and it was a appeared to be a huge spider of some 144 00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:38,480 sort. 145 00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:41,360 And I thought, aliens, is that what happened here? 146 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:43,600 You know, I was just totally for shadow art. 147 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:46,480 It was a lot of other things that happened there. 148 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:51,160 But basically, I tried to run and make a run for it because there were these other creatures 149 00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:53,080 coming in and I fell on my back. 150 00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:55,920 And when I did, I I never really hit the ground. 151 00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:58,280 It was just black. 152 00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:01,040 And then Eric, another scene came up. 153 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:04,640 This was very disconcerting, to say the least. 154 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:09,320 What's the difference between what you were going through and just a really bad nightmare? 155 00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:14,920 Well, this is 23 years ago, and I can't tell you what I dreamt last night. 156 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:19,120 The doctor told me I would be unable to remember anything, basically. 157 00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:23,240 That's because it happened in my soul, not in my brain. 158 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,560 Yeah. 159 00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:25,560 That's what happened. 160 00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:29,360 And people that come back, they can always tell you every minute they were there. 161 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:35,200 And my adventure, when I got back and I was, you know, laying unable to move or talk, I 162 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:39,600 kind of played it through my mind and I figured it felt like I was there about two years. 163 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:40,600 Wow. 164 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,640 With all the stuff that happened in the length of time. 165 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:48,040 But there's no watches, you know, there's no clocks, and there is no time on the other 166 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:51,960 side, which is also disturbing. 167 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:54,800 And you don't, as somebody else said, well, didn't you look down? 168 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,240 Didn't you see you were a ghost or whatever? 169 00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:59,840 And it's like, how often a day do you look, check to see if you've got feet? 170 00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:04,360 You know, no, I just, there were no mirrors. 171 00:10:04,360 --> 00:10:05,680 People were talking to me. 172 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:09,320 I assumed and I felt like I was alive. 173 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:10,880 So I had to keep going. 174 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:15,640 And the first demon I ran into was, it was a shock. 175 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,400 This thing was so big. 176 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:23,000 And I just kind of stopped and I looked up because he was seven feet tall or something. 177 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:29,520 And demons, the only word you could have fixed to it, you know, kind of like a really mean 178 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:36,400 big foot, big guy with a club saying he's a man of authority. 179 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:37,400 And I just stopped. 180 00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:39,200 I thought, oh my, now what? 181 00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:42,920 You know, and he says, you want to get out of here? 182 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:43,920 Perfect English. 183 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,520 I said, yes, I do. 184 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,120 And he said, well, I can make that happen for you. 185 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:50,320 I just got a job for you. 186 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:53,440 If you get it done, I'll let you, I'll find a way out for you. 187 00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:55,680 And I thought, okay, job. 188 00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:56,680 Okay. 189 00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:57,680 Well, I'm game. 190 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,920 I don't have any better offers. 191 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:04,000 So again, the lights came up behind him. 192 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:08,280 And as far as I could see was this blackberry patch. 193 00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:14,120 Tall blackberry canes all intertwined together with the big thorns on them and stuff. 194 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:19,800 And I just looked and he says, you cut those down for me and I'll get you out of here. 195 00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:24,280 Well, now in my own life, I bought property that had these canes on it. 196 00:11:24,280 --> 00:11:26,800 It takes a lot of work to get these things out of here. 197 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,840 I mean, to tell you, but something that size. 198 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:32,320 I thought, well, I got nothing better to do. 199 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:38,040 And, you know, so he handed me these like scissors that they use kids use to cut paper. 200 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:42,520 And then he started to chuckle, you know, funny. 201 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:44,960 And I thought, what a jerk. 202 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:45,960 He's playing with me. 203 00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:46,960 It's like a cat nose thing. 204 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,960 I thought, well, this is the only offer I've had. 205 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:54,040 So I'm, I'm scooching down, trying not to get all scratched up, which I was getting. 206 00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:57,400 And I started gnawing on one of these canes and it was tough. 207 00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:58,840 It was, it was hard. 208 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,600 And finally, I don't know how long it took. 209 00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:04,960 And finally I cut it loose and I went to put it behind me so I could work on the next 210 00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:05,960 one. 211 00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:09,760 And when I turned back around, it had grown back. 212 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:12,120 So now the demon is really laughing. 213 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:13,600 Who thinks this is hysterical? 214 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:17,960 And I, you know, you just, you can't give up. 215 00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:18,960 That's what he said. 216 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:20,560 He says, go ahead and despair. 217 00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:22,400 You're never getting out here. 218 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,080 And I said, no, I'm not going to do that. 219 00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:25,080 I'm a fighter. 220 00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:26,080 I'm not going to leave. 221 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:27,240 And so he says, well, get at it. 222 00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:30,680 So I start cutting again and it went black. 223 00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:32,560 And then the lights came up. 224 00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:35,120 And this happened lots of times. 225 00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:40,680 And in between there was this road and somebody asked me the other day, was it a yellow brick 226 00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:41,680 road? 227 00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,680 And I said, no, it was not. 228 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:50,880 It was dirt and rocks and a landscape that was illuminated again by this reddish glow 229 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:54,000 in the distance, which, you know, wasn't the sun. 230 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,320 There was no stars. 231 00:12:56,320 --> 00:13:00,520 But it was enough light to where I could get on the road and, you know, walk around the 232 00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:03,120 rocks and the pits and all that stuff. 233 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:07,640 And at least I could kind of turn and do a 360 and see if something was following me 234 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:09,040 or creeping up on me. 235 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:12,040 And I felt fairly safe on that road. 236 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:17,760 So it was off and on between some of these other scenarios that I would find myself back 237 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:18,760 on the road. 238 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:21,360 How many of these scenarios were there? 239 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:24,280 I'd have to stop and add them up. 240 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:25,800 But it seemed like a lot, right? 241 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:27,840 Oh, it was a lot. 242 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:32,120 And the book, just writing that blasted book, it took me a long time. 243 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:36,360 I'm telling you, boxes and boxes of Kleenex to get through that thing because I had to 244 00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:37,360 relive it. 245 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,240 I mean, every, you know, all the emotion. 246 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:44,760 I've gotten kind of a little removed from it now after telling it so many times. 247 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:50,400 Thank God, I still keep Kleenex next to me because I'll usually break down once or twice. 248 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:53,360 But yeah, it was a pretty unpleasant situation. 249 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:54,840 It was hell. 250 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:58,920 So I saw two living people there. 251 00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:02,800 But I've never heard anybody else who's seen somebody that's alive. 252 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:10,200 And it turned out when I got back, it was obvious I had to give them warnings about their lives 253 00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:12,080 and what they were doing. 254 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:15,680 And the first person I told did not take it well. 255 00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:20,920 I mean, how do you feel if somebody comes up to you and say, say, I saw you in hell, 256 00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:22,280 you're really screwing up here. 257 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:23,600 You have to change something. 258 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,800 Well, you know, they're going to back off. 259 00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,800 Were these strangers or people that you knew? 260 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:32,440 No, these are family members that I was very close to. 261 00:14:32,440 --> 00:14:35,800 It was a little touchy. 262 00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:39,720 So now after about a couple of months, I haven't heard from her in 20 years. 263 00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:41,760 All right, that didn't go well. 264 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:45,120 The second one was a younger person. 265 00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:49,240 I saw her on the road. 266 00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:51,760 She was a darling girl. 267 00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:55,720 She'd recently been married and was learning how to cook. 268 00:14:55,720 --> 00:15:00,080 And she was just doing a great job or husband liked to entertain. 269 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:06,080 And anyway, he was using her for his advancement, but you know, she was too sweet. 270 00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:07,600 Anyway, I'm walking along the road. 271 00:15:07,600 --> 00:15:10,640 I've been going, I've been there a long time. 272 00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:11,960 I just feel like I have. 273 00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:18,720 I feel like I'm hungry and I'm thirsty and I'm tired and I'm depressed and all those 274 00:15:18,720 --> 00:15:22,000 things because I still felt I was alive. 275 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:26,960 And I started smelling something really good for a change. 276 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:32,160 And as I got down the road, it was still dim, you know, and I got to this spot where there's 277 00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:37,520 a man sitting on the left in a chair watching this woman on the right do all this cooking 278 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,520 and preparing. 279 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:42,680 There were big tables just heaped with yummy stuff. 280 00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:47,640 And I recognized her, but she didn't recognize me. 281 00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:51,840 And I said her name, you know, and I said, she, can you just. 282 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:53,640 Get me a small plate. 283 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:57,320 Just I just grab a couple of those little things in a glass of water. 284 00:15:57,320 --> 00:15:58,920 I don't want to, I know you're busy. 285 00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:04,520 And she just looked at me and said, well, this is for the important people. 286 00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,520 Oh, thanks. 287 00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:07,520 Slap. 288 00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:13,280 You know, I backed up and I said, Oh, I'm terribly sorry. 289 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:14,680 And all my feelings were hurt. 290 00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:17,240 I was so disappointed. 291 00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:21,360 And she just turned her back on me and kept futzing around with her feast. 292 00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:25,800 And so I just reluctantly went back on my way. 293 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:26,800 Yeah. 294 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,800 Can I just ask you a question about that? 295 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:29,800 Why food? 296 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:34,720 I mean, you mentioned earlier, you mentioned earlier that we're not our bodies. 297 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:35,720 No. 298 00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:40,160 So your soul was there and is our soul need food? 299 00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:42,840 No, absolutely not. 300 00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:44,400 But I didn't know I was dead. 301 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:48,600 And I thought for, you know, all this time I'm walking, I'm doing all this stuff. 302 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:49,760 I'm tired. 303 00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:50,760 Maybe I need a meal. 304 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:52,400 I had no idea. 305 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:55,480 I don't even know if she'd given me something if I could have eaten it. 306 00:16:55,480 --> 00:17:04,160 It was just the, you know, it was part of the whole process of believing that I was 307 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:05,320 still alive. 308 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:07,400 Can't explain it. 309 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:08,960 It doesn't make sense on the other side. 310 00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,600 It's kind of like being in the matrix. 311 00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:12,280 Things just don't quite make sense. 312 00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:17,160 Well, it's not because we're looking at them with the eyes that we have here. 313 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:18,160 Well. 314 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:21,000 At least when you got back, you were trying to interpret it that way. 315 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:22,000 I would assume. 316 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,920 No, I manifested all of that. 317 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:25,920 Okay. 318 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,760 We'll get to that. 319 00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:29,760 Okay. 320 00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:33,960 I got, had a horrible time with a bunch of zombies. 321 00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:38,920 I was for one of the better word gang raped. 322 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:41,800 Now, how do you know you've had that experience? 323 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:46,240 They pushed me and shoved me and kicked me and abused me. 324 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:49,440 When I got back, that was one of the questions I kept asking. 325 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:51,880 How did I sense that or whatever? 326 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,480 But Robert, let's see, what's his name? 327 00:17:54,480 --> 00:18:00,360 Roland Milero, I can't ever say his last name, had a book that he wrote and his, he 328 00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:01,640 was in it. 329 00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:07,000 This priest was being questioned by a Nazi who said, I'm not going to do, I know your 330 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:11,600 your help and the Polish people get out and I'm not going to do anything to you today, 331 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:13,160 but I am going to come back. 332 00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:16,360 And when I do, I'm going to rip out your tongue. 333 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:21,600 I'm going to cut off your fingers one by one and, you know, we'll have a good time. 334 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,920 So I'll see you soon. 335 00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:31,640 Now when somebody says that your body automatically responds to the feelings that are going to 336 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:32,640 happen. 337 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:37,600 It's like when you're in grade school and the bully comes up and he's always punching 338 00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:42,680 people in the nose, but he, when he punches you and you go, oh, and he's short. 339 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,840 Just an inch, he never touches you. 340 00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:50,720 You still have that fear, that reaction that, that you saw this going to happen to you. 341 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:54,920 So it's, that's the best I can psychologically tell you. 342 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:58,040 You think you're real, you think it's happening. 343 00:18:58,040 --> 00:19:02,000 And so there's, there's a sense of it happening. 344 00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:07,600 After that particular one, we're kind of coming to towards the end, even though these things 345 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:12,120 were taking, in my opinion, a lot of time. 346 00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:17,480 Another demon lady came over and when the others backed off, she says, you're one of 347 00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:18,920 us now. 348 00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:19,920 Come with a group. 349 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:22,640 Get up, get up, get your clothes on, get up. 350 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:26,600 So I was very disheartened. 351 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:30,440 At least there were other, what looked like people, these women. 352 00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:34,400 And I was going to get out of this situation. 353 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:40,360 So we, we, she gathered us up and we started one by one, traipsing behind her, having no 354 00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:48,160 idea where we were going, just so disillusioned, so broken, just the fight was just draining 355 00:19:48,160 --> 00:19:50,160 out of me. 356 00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:56,640 As we cleared these trees, it turned into an immense area that was full of snow and 357 00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:59,720 the snow was coming down and none of us had very much clothing on. 358 00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:04,200 So we walked behind each other and, and the only way I could measure how much time it 359 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:09,840 took is that the snow was just, just lightly falling and the wind was blowing. 360 00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:14,520 But by the time we got where we were going, it was chest high and we were following each 361 00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:17,400 other behind one another one by one. 362 00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:20,120 And so freezing, just freezing. 363 00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:27,040 And we got to this cabin and she shuffled us in there and we kind of huddled together 364 00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:32,320 for warmth and there was no insulation, the snow and the wind was blowing through and, 365 00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:37,040 and she says, okay, now we get ready for customers. 366 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,360 And that did not sound good, you know. 367 00:20:39,360 --> 00:20:45,320 And so we all kind of sat on the floor, you couldn't even talk to each other, just, just 368 00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:47,000 dejected. 369 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:50,720 And I said to her, you had been here a long time. 370 00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:56,080 And this seems like a particularly heavy, heavy, sad time. 371 00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:58,080 Am I missing something? 372 00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:03,120 And she says, oh no, it's Christmas on earth today. 373 00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:05,520 That's the worst day in hell. 374 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:08,880 And hell was the first time it hit me. 375 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:12,520 I just couldn't believe it. 376 00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:16,960 And I thought, well, this is really ticking me off. 377 00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:20,440 This whole thing, I don't know how I got here and I don't know how I'm getting out. 378 00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:23,640 And I may not get out, but I'm not ready to give up. 379 00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:26,440 So I thought, okay, which here we go. 380 00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:29,600 I'm going to sing a Christmas carol, I said to myself. 381 00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:36,680 And so I started and I loved away in a manger and I started singing away in a manger, no 382 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:41,840 crib for his bed, and she swung around, she was on the other side of the room, she held, 383 00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:42,840 shut up. 384 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:46,240 And then one and two of the other ladies started singing with me. 385 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:48,240 And then there were several. 386 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:53,520 And when I got to the part that said, the little Lord, she shrieked and jumped at me 387 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:59,360 and I closed my eyes and boom, I was somewhere else. 388 00:21:59,360 --> 00:22:08,440 And this time it was a bright light and I was full of joy and bliss and love. 389 00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:16,160 And I felt like every molecule of my being was just saturated, swimming in this love. 390 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:18,920 And everything that had happened was gone in my mind. 391 00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,600 I couldn't remember anything. 392 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:25,400 All I could experience was this great joy. 393 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:30,040 And as I kind of tried to catch my breath and look around, I saw my friend that had 394 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,440 died the month before. 395 00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:34,000 And he looked great. 396 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:38,640 I mean, he'd had leukemia and his hair had fallen out and he was all purple and swollen. 397 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:45,560 And he looked wonderful and he looked about 35 and I'm questioning what I'm seeing. 398 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:50,760 And his hair was brown instead of gray and he was actually wearing a sweater I had given 399 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:53,200 him and he's laughing. 400 00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:58,800 And the thing that came to my mind was, oh no, he doesn't know he's dead. 401 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:02,080 And he started really belly laughing. 402 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:03,400 And I thought, how did he hear me? 403 00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:04,400 I didn't say that. 404 00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:12,160 Oh my gosh, if he is really dead, then I am really dead and I'm in heaven. 405 00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:14,720 I'm telling you, it made my day. 406 00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,640 I was so excited. 407 00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:19,280 That's quite a transition. 408 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:24,320 I have so many questions along the way here. 409 00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:30,520 Number one, and I know a lot of these are just, you're going to have to just guess or use 410 00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:33,320 what maybe you've thought about since. 411 00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:36,920 Why is Christmas the worst day in hell? 412 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:37,920 Got me. 413 00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:39,400 I don't know. 414 00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:46,160 I think because I was raised, I'm a cradle Catholic from the day one, always went to Catholic 415 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,040 schools, always. 416 00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:54,960 And I was taught so much about Jesus is coming as a savior of the world and everything was 417 00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:56,320 going to change in me. 418 00:23:56,320 --> 00:24:00,040 It was just ingrained in everything I believed. 419 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:08,640 So for me, that I guess just seemed like the most wonderful thing that could dispel evil 420 00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,200 and darkness. 421 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:11,480 Okay. 422 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:16,600 So just to rephrase, what did it take to get you from hell to heaven? 423 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:18,680 What was the one main thing? 424 00:24:18,680 --> 00:24:20,880 I almost said the name of Jesus. 425 00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:21,880 Okay. 426 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:25,280 That's all like, yeah, that's got to be it. 427 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:29,440 Is that I, it was the little Lord and that's when the thing changed. 428 00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:30,720 I never got to say it. 429 00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:34,440 I've had people in the Bible belt said, well, I've had said it right up front. 430 00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:36,400 You wouldn't have stayed there for two years. 431 00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:39,000 Well, no, yeah. 432 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:44,000 This whole thing, like everything in our lives, we plan. 433 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:45,880 I planned this. 434 00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,920 It took me 20 years to realize that. 435 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:55,320 It took me 10 years to find somebody that would listen to my story at an IAINs meeting 436 00:24:55,320 --> 00:25:03,160 through all kinds of synchronicities that were just too, they were planned. 437 00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:04,800 I got to an IAINs meeting. 438 00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,160 I mean, my family wouldn't listen to me. 439 00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:08,160 You know, it's the drugs. 440 00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:11,000 You know, I don't want to hear about you being in hell. 441 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:12,720 That sucks. 442 00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:18,360 But to get to an IAINs meeting and again, like you let in, they had all these, you know, 443 00:25:18,360 --> 00:25:22,040 go to a meeting and somebody speaks and, you know, they were in the tunnel. 444 00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:23,040 They saw the light. 445 00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:28,240 They got angels, you know, they got bunny rabbits and they got flowers and I'm sitting 446 00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:31,920 there going, I don't think I fit in here. 447 00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:36,720 You know, and finally somebody asked me, did you have a near-death experience? 448 00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:38,200 And I says, ah, yes, I did. 449 00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:40,400 Well, you'll have to come speak to the meeting. 450 00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:41,520 I said, no, I won't. 451 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:43,480 I says, I don't belong here. 452 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:47,320 And then Greg, this guy that runs the place up there and says, you're going to tell me 453 00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:48,880 what happened. 454 00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:53,560 And he had to peel it out of me and it took two boxes of Kleenex to talk to him because 455 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:57,760 I had never told it to a soul. 456 00:25:57,760 --> 00:26:05,680 And so after 10 years, I carry in that guilt and horror around all by myself as a wonder, 457 00:26:05,680 --> 00:26:07,600 I was still sane. 458 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:12,440 And so he listened and he got to the end of it, we were on the phone when this happened. 459 00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:17,200 And he says, well, we have this little scoring mechanism here, you know, that I have to check 460 00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:22,920 off and then just validate the fact that you had a legitimate, you know, NDE blah, blah, 461 00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:28,520 blah, I'm sitting there piled Kleenex all over me and he says, you hit them all. 462 00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:29,520 Okay. 463 00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:31,320 And then he got an extra one. 464 00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:32,320 You got extra points. 465 00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:36,040 He says, you have got to come to a meeting and tell us a story. 466 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:37,680 And I said, not on your life. 467 00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,480 And he says, no, I'm not going to give up. 468 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:44,200 And I says, well, this was, this is around Christmas time. 469 00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:49,560 I was getting into divorce, you know, my life was not real happy at that time. 470 00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:51,040 I says, I'll call you. 471 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,440 He says, I'll call you in three months if you don't call me. 472 00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:55,040 And he had to call me back. 473 00:26:55,040 --> 00:27:00,040 But you know, I finally got the guts to go up there through another synchronicity. 474 00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:04,880 When you come back, the voice is really loud in your head. 475 00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:10,480 This voice that a lot of us think is our guardian angel or a higher self or, or whatever. 476 00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:13,600 Sometimes you're, you know, should I shouldn't I? 477 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:16,560 And the voice says, no, it's not a good idea. 478 00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:22,160 Or one time I was almost hit by a runaway truck and the voice just out of nowhere. 479 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:26,160 I was stopped in a stoplight and said, turn to the right. 480 00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:27,680 And so I did. 481 00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:32,160 And a truck went, I mean, a double decker took what's sailing by me. 482 00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,440 He'd lost his brakes right into the intersection. 483 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:35,960 Look out two cars. 484 00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,320 So I learned to listen to the voice. 485 00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:43,360 But when I got back, this thing argued with me, you know, you're going to go back to another 486 00:27:43,360 --> 00:27:44,360 I am's meeting. 487 00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:45,360 I'm not going to go back. 488 00:27:45,360 --> 00:27:46,640 I don't belong there. 489 00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:47,640 You're going to go back. 490 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:48,640 You have to meet somebody. 491 00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:49,640 I'm not going. 492 00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:51,080 The traffic sucks. 493 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:52,080 Get your car keys. 494 00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:55,720 I mean, I'm driving all the way up there and I'm arguing with the voice. 495 00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,480 And he says, you know, I got to meet somebody. 496 00:27:58,480 --> 00:27:59,760 So I get in here. 497 00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:01,720 And of course it's Evan Alexander. 498 00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:03,960 I never heard this, this man speak. 499 00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:11,040 He's the neuroscientist surgeon, whatever, who had a brain bleed, you know, a flat line, 500 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:12,360 EKG flat line. 501 00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:15,480 And he had like, you know, a 10 year experience up there or something. 502 00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:16,480 So I didn't know who he was. 503 00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,840 So I, there's, I got there early. 504 00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:23,080 There was 10 seats ahead of me, 10 rows behind me, 10 seats down this aisle. 505 00:28:23,080 --> 00:28:24,080 I sat on the end. 506 00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:27,400 I thought, if somebody I'm supposed to meet, they're going to have to work for it because 507 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:29,480 his voice is long. 508 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:33,840 So I sat there and I waited and out of the corner of my eye, I saw this woman walk by 509 00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:38,160 my, my aisle on 10 seats down and I kept my eyes down. 510 00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:40,280 I didn't want to make any eye contact. 511 00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:44,280 And she stopped and she kind of cocked her head like she was listening to something. 512 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:45,280 And then she backed up. 513 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:51,400 She didn't turn around and stopped and then went down my aisle and sat right next to me. 514 00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:54,480 And I thought, oh, this is weird. 515 00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:56,600 And so I, she says, hi, you knew? 516 00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:58,600 And I says, yes. 517 00:28:58,600 --> 00:28:59,600 Didn't talk to her. 518 00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:05,320 So we listened to the first part of Evan's speech and oh man, my mind was blown. 519 00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:08,840 I thought, oh, wow, this sounds like science and blah, blah, blah. 520 00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:09,840 And she turned to me. 521 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:10,840 She says, what do you think? 522 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:11,840 And I says, I think it's great. 523 00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:15,960 And I says, oh, you know, I was supposed to meet you today. 524 00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:16,960 She says, yeah, I know. 525 00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:19,040 I said, what do you mean you know? 526 00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:22,840 And she says, well, I walked by and my voice said, go sit next to that lady. 527 00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:23,840 She's really nice. 528 00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:24,840 So I did. 529 00:29:24,840 --> 00:29:27,120 Who's this voice that you're talking about? 530 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,280 What do you, what do you think it is? 531 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:32,200 I think it's my higher self. 532 00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:36,480 You know, people have their thoughts, your guardian angel, but more likely your higher 533 00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:37,480 self. 534 00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:43,920 I mean, we're a soul, but we're also part of our soul is encapsulated in this lovely 535 00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:48,040 body, but there's still enough to where we're still connected. 536 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:49,040 We're still a soul. 537 00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,760 So that's, that's the voice. 538 00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:55,120 Ask almost anybody that's had an NDE and they'll tell you about the voice. 539 00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:56,120 Okay. 540 00:29:56,120 --> 00:29:57,120 Finish this part. 541 00:29:57,120 --> 00:30:00,400 We're going to get back to the NDE, the happy part of it. 542 00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:01,400 Okay. 543 00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:05,120 So anyway, she turned out to be a person that did not want to tell her story because she 544 00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:08,600 had kind of a bad way she died. 545 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:13,120 And so she says, I'll tell you what, I'll sit in the front row and when you give your 546 00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:14,520 story, you just look at me. 547 00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:15,680 Don't look at anybody else. 548 00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:17,800 And then when I tell my story, I'll do the same. 549 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:19,680 I thought, well, I think I can do that. 550 00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:20,680 So she did. 551 00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:22,160 She sat in the front row, the room was packed. 552 00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:27,080 I guess that it got out that somebody had had a dark one and it was a doozy. 553 00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:31,840 And so I, I kind of stumbled around, but then I'm a storyteller. 554 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:32,840 So I got into it. 555 00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:34,320 You could have heard a pin drop in the room. 556 00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:36,320 They were all Google-eyed looking at me. 557 00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:40,000 And at the very end, when we got out with the Christmas Carol, there was applause. 558 00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,320 I mean, they were, they were with me the whole way. 559 00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:43,320 They were so excited. 560 00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:44,320 Now they got the clue. 561 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:49,240 They ever, I said, so if you ever find yourself in hell, sing a Christmas Carol, not Rudolph 562 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:50,240 the red nose reindeer. 563 00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:51,240 All right. 564 00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:52,880 So that's how I ended it. 565 00:30:52,880 --> 00:31:01,120 Back in heaven when I was there and I was excited to see my friend and I realized I was in heaven 566 00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:02,680 and he was in heaven. 567 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:08,520 I caught out of the corner of my eye and I looked over to see this big architects table 568 00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:12,400 with a huge book on it and it was open about halfway. 569 00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:15,760 And I thought to myself, he was showing me something in that book. 570 00:31:15,760 --> 00:31:16,760 What was it? 571 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:18,280 Oh, never mind. 572 00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:23,720 Later I figured out he probably was showing me my life and only half of it was gone. 573 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:24,720 53. 574 00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:28,520 And anyway, when he came up to me, he wouldn't let me touch him. 575 00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:32,360 He just said, now, Mary Kay, you've got too much left to do. 576 00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:36,280 I said, oh, oh, and my self, they're kicking me. 577 00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,560 Oh, this is the bum's rush. 578 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:39,800 I said, no. 579 00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:47,960 And I crossed my arms and I stared at him and I was somewhere else. 580 00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:53,280 I believe God was kind enough to give me a timeout for a little while because I was really 581 00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:54,960 upset and mad. 582 00:31:54,960 --> 00:32:01,280 And so I was walking along this beautiful stream, kind of a heavenly scene, flowers in 583 00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:02,280 the meadow. 584 00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:08,320 And I was going down, down, down this stream and I met three different women that spoke 585 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:14,000 some sort of Norwegian language or something and they were giving me things for a trousseau, 586 00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:18,760 like a quilt and a little knighty. 587 00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:23,720 And I was loading up on this stuff, walking down this stream, these slippery rocks. 588 00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:28,520 And I finally got to the bottom and the lady said, you know, and she handed me something 589 00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:33,880 that was a note and she said, give it to him. 590 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:37,680 And I thought, can this get any weirder? 591 00:32:37,680 --> 00:32:40,640 But then that's when the lights came up. 592 00:32:40,640 --> 00:32:41,640 Right lights. 593 00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:42,640 Oh, no. 594 00:32:42,640 --> 00:32:43,640 Not again. 595 00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:44,640 Bad news. 596 00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:48,480 That's because you're in the ICU. 597 00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:51,200 So I'm a little discombobulated. 598 00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:53,840 I'm now somewhere I haven't been before. 599 00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:55,960 I'm thinking what is it? 600 00:32:55,960 --> 00:32:58,160 What fresh hell is this? 601 00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:00,520 And these people are all jumping up and down. 602 00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:01,800 They're so excited. 603 00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:04,120 And somebody says, mom's back. 604 00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:08,400 And I thought, no, I'm back. 605 00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:10,840 And I couldn't talk and I couldn't move. 606 00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:16,320 And I was too hot and I thought, you know, what the hell is going on? 607 00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:20,360 And my daughter came and sat next to me and says, mom, you've been really sick. 608 00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:24,600 We didn't think you were going to make it, but you're back and you're going to take a 609 00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:27,240 little work to get back to your normal self. 610 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,680 But we're right here with you. 611 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:33,160 And I thought, it's a good thing I can't talk. 612 00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:37,520 My mother's saying, oh, we had a prayer circle, darling, going around the world to bring you 613 00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:38,520 back. 614 00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:44,520 And I thought, if I could get my hands around your throat, I would teach you that, you know, 615 00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:47,720 what you have done, you have no idea what your people have done. 616 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:49,360 Because you didn't want to come back. 617 00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:50,440 No. 618 00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:54,000 And how on the devil am I supposed to do all this work? 619 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:57,880 When I can't breathe, I can't talk, I can't move. 620 00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:01,000 It was not a good situation. 621 00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:03,600 I didn't see the positive in that. 622 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:04,600 No. 623 00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:05,600 Yeah. 624 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:08,040 Tell me about the note that you were supposed to give to somebody. 625 00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:10,080 Yeah, it was a note. 626 00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:13,960 And I was supposed to tell him we were supposed to live together. 627 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:15,960 Tell him after lived again. 628 00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:18,160 That was everything in English. 629 00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:19,160 And who's that? 630 00:34:19,160 --> 00:34:23,120 It was a guy I was dating when all this was happening. 631 00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:24,520 Who was Norwegian? 632 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:29,720 Anyway, we had talked about, you know, we had been dating six months and we figured at 633 00:34:29,720 --> 00:34:32,800 the end of six months, we would either get engaged or break up. 634 00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:37,160 Well, he decided he still wasn't over his ex-wife, so he wanted to break up. 635 00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:38,720 That's the last I knew. 636 00:34:38,720 --> 00:34:39,720 Then I went into coma. 637 00:34:39,720 --> 00:34:43,680 He did come pick me up because I called him and I was hysterical that I was dying and 638 00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,480 he took me to the hospital at the dock in the box. 639 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:47,960 He saved my life. 640 00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:52,480 If he hadn't come that night, I was up on the third floor coughing up blood. 641 00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:56,240 There was no way I could, no elevator, no way I could get down those stairs and get to 642 00:34:56,240 --> 00:34:57,240 the dock in the box. 643 00:34:57,240 --> 00:35:00,880 So he, I called him and begged him and he says, oh, all right. 644 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:05,440 You know, so anyway, later on, 10 years later, I saved his life. 645 00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:09,880 So again, one of those things you plan and that was our deal. 646 00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:10,880 You saved my life. 647 00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:12,040 I'll save yours. 648 00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:16,080 So the note said I had to give him this piece of paper. 649 00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:20,360 So when I woke up, I felt like my hand was still holding the piece of paper. 650 00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,040 It was still that, that real. 651 00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:28,920 So he came in and I was shocked and because I thought we had broken up and somebody said, 652 00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:32,560 you know, he's been here every single day of the, that you've been in the coma. 653 00:35:32,560 --> 00:35:34,560 He's been working, you know, out of town. 654 00:35:34,560 --> 00:35:40,520 He drives an hour in to see you at night and sit by your bed and then drives an hour home. 655 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:44,720 He's done this, you know, for what it was, 18, 19 days in a row. 656 00:35:44,720 --> 00:35:51,800 And when I finally, it was quite a while before I could talk, I said, I was told by these 657 00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:53,680 ladies that we should live together. 658 00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:58,480 And he says, oh, I, I can't just, you know, I'm Luther and we don't just live with people. 659 00:35:58,480 --> 00:35:59,480 We'll have to get married. 660 00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:00,960 And I was like, oh, I don't want to get married. 661 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:03,320 I said, look at me, you know, I can't move. 662 00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:07,720 And he, you know, he says, no, and he, he brought flowers and balloons the next day and 663 00:36:07,720 --> 00:36:10,160 proposed in front of two nurses. 664 00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:11,160 And you know, they were crying. 665 00:36:11,160 --> 00:36:13,560 Oh, he got through the ward and everything. 666 00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:16,480 It was, so that's what happened there. 667 00:36:16,480 --> 00:36:17,480 Wow. 668 00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:18,480 That's a neat story. 669 00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:19,480 Where were you? 670 00:36:19,480 --> 00:36:20,480 Were you in heaven? 671 00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:22,360 I mean, you talk about how were you in heaven? 672 00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:24,120 Were you in some other great place? 673 00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:25,880 No, I had to be heaven. 674 00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:27,380 There's nothing like it. 675 00:36:27,380 --> 00:36:28,380 Nothing like it. 676 00:36:28,380 --> 00:36:31,240 And then I got, I got kicked out because I had too much left to do. 677 00:36:31,240 --> 00:36:35,400 So finally I could, I could, they put a device in my throat and I could talk. 678 00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:41,360 And then I had to take another week to have the insurance people come in and reluctantly 679 00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:48,440 given, give me a month in a physical rehab facility so they could at least get me out 680 00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:49,440 of the hospital. 681 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,560 I had to learn so much stuff. 682 00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:56,080 And because I had been on a nasal tube, I was down to 86 pounds. 683 00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:57,840 So I had no muscle mass left. 684 00:36:57,840 --> 00:36:59,160 That means no muscle memory. 685 00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:04,440 I had to learn how to walk, talk, crawl, go up steps, swallow, button. 686 00:37:04,440 --> 00:37:05,960 I didn't remember anything. 687 00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,000 So that was a tough month. 688 00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:09,000 Let me tell you. 689 00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:14,800 And then this man took me to his house and took care of me. 690 00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:21,360 And while he worked and slowly I got my, my physical strength back, fighting with the 691 00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:25,440 insurance company over a pile of bills. 692 00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:28,640 You can imagine how much that cost. 693 00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:31,560 So I kept being haunted. 694 00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:35,840 I was scared to death to sleep because I was afraid these demons were going to come back 695 00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:36,960 and I'd slip away. 696 00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:38,800 It was terrifying. 697 00:37:38,800 --> 00:37:42,040 And finally I thought, I just need to write this out. 698 00:37:42,040 --> 00:37:43,040 I need to write it out. 699 00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:46,760 I'm a writer and I'd write it out and I'd stick it in the drawer and I thought, well, if I 700 00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:49,800 can just write it out enough, it'll go away. 701 00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:51,800 It'll, it'll, it'll be a story. 702 00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:52,800 It'll be a dream. 703 00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:53,800 But it didn't. 704 00:37:53,800 --> 00:37:55,800 It did not go away. 705 00:37:55,800 --> 00:38:03,960 So 10 years later, I asked Lord, I'm at Ions and then 10 years more, two decades to write 706 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:04,960 the book. 707 00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:05,960 It took a long time. 708 00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:11,080 And like I said, it was really hard, really awfully hard. 709 00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:16,440 And after all this, you know, talking to so many other people, particularly people that 710 00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:21,600 have had the near death that are distressing like Nancy Evans Bush. 711 00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:22,600 She's written three books. 712 00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:23,600 She's great. 713 00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:28,560 Her premise is, as we planned all this, I planned my trip to hell. 714 00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:35,560 Then, and she considers the distressing people to be brave souls because they go into the 715 00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:36,880 dark places. 716 00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:40,560 They bring back the information that we all need. 717 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:44,160 And in this case, I've learned from other people. 718 00:38:44,160 --> 00:38:45,880 I didn't get a life review myself. 719 00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:51,360 I wasn't there long enough, but that, that we plan this, we get a life review, we get 720 00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:56,200 angels and guide stand with us and you get to see how you did about learning those lessons 721 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:57,720 that you signed up for. 722 00:38:57,720 --> 00:39:02,640 And sure, you know, I did pretty good there, you know, or didn't do so good there. 723 00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:08,520 And then they supposedly slip it around and you get to feel how everybody felt when they 724 00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:10,480 interacted with you. 725 00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:13,160 What was your, what was your kindnesses? 726 00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:14,160 What were your kindnesses? 727 00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:20,240 What were your times where maybe a little witchy with somebody, you get to understand 728 00:39:20,240 --> 00:39:23,080 how your life went and there's no judgment. 729 00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:25,320 There is no judgment. 730 00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:29,120 God is all love, all forgiving. 731 00:39:29,120 --> 00:39:31,480 He has never condemned anybody. 732 00:39:31,480 --> 00:39:33,880 There really is no hell. 733 00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:35,480 So what the hell happened? 734 00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:36,480 Okay. 735 00:39:36,480 --> 00:39:43,040 I was taught from day one that I, as a Catholic, there was heaven, purgatory and hell. 736 00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:44,760 Nobody goes straight to heaven. 737 00:39:44,760 --> 00:39:48,920 Maybe Mother Teresa, but the rest of us have to go to purgatory, which is hell, except 738 00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:51,560 to get out and get your sins burned off. 739 00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:54,520 So you'll be pure and go up to God. 740 00:39:54,520 --> 00:40:00,720 I bought it and when I died, I expected it and I manifested it. 741 00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:05,920 And I took all these horrible things that happened in my life, rapes and other terrible 742 00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:07,680 things that happened to me in my life. 743 00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:11,680 And I brought them all to hell and I puffed them up real big, added a couple of demons 744 00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:13,440 and made my own. 745 00:40:13,440 --> 00:40:16,920 So my message is skip the trip. 746 00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:18,680 You don't have to go to hell. 747 00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:22,520 Unless you inadvertently choose to. 748 00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:25,520 So that's why I'm here. 749 00:40:25,520 --> 00:40:26,760 That's interesting. 750 00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:31,840 I thought one of the things that stuck out to me when you were talking about this hell 751 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:34,480 experience is that you were alone. 752 00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:38,320 And by the way, yours is not the only dark story that we've heard here. 753 00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:43,960 In fact, just a couple episodes ago, I think it was number 214 of our podcast. 754 00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:48,560 If people want to look at it, Aaron's experience, he had some really scary stuff too. 755 00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:50,440 I heard, I read it. 756 00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:51,840 I listened to it. 757 00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:53,840 Yeah, Aaron. 758 00:40:53,840 --> 00:40:54,840 He's awesome. 759 00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:55,840 I know. 760 00:40:55,840 --> 00:40:56,840 Poor Aaron. 761 00:40:56,840 --> 00:40:58,240 I'd like to talk to him. 762 00:40:58,240 --> 00:41:04,040 But it's interesting to hear that in hell or the hell that you created, you were alone. 763 00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:09,480 And I am always hearing from people when they're in some kind of a heaven that there's other 764 00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:16,160 people there, whether it's a guide or God or friends or something that there are other 765 00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:17,160 people there. 766 00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:22,360 And that's something that we don't, doesn't get talked about much, but it's one of the 767 00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:24,360 opposites of the two places. 768 00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:25,360 It's true. 769 00:41:25,360 --> 00:41:26,800 I've never really looked at it that way. 770 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:34,120 Yes, we are all souls and we're all connected in heaven, but in a makeup, made up place, 771 00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:35,800 you know, you're not connected. 772 00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:41,200 It's too strong to say it's imagination because it's real. 773 00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:45,000 Because what we're living in now is not real. 774 00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:46,840 It just seems real. 775 00:41:46,840 --> 00:41:48,040 It feels pretty real. 776 00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:50,960 It feels real, but it's not. 777 00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:52,760 This is all an illusion. 778 00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:57,120 You know, I mean, it was, we've created it and we're all here. 779 00:41:57,120 --> 00:42:04,040 I find myself, it's hard to wrap my mind around this too, but to talk to so many people, smarter 780 00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:09,880 than me or whatever, that I'll agree that this is just a, I mean, when we die, we can 781 00:42:09,880 --> 00:42:11,160 be reincarnated. 782 00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:13,760 If we want to, we can go to different universes. 783 00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:14,760 We can be aliens. 784 00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:18,200 We can, there's a, a, the bacteria. 785 00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:24,960 There's so much that this little tiny human brain is just incapable of understanding. 786 00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:28,000 We have to, a lot of it's the only thing on faith. 787 00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:31,680 I know, I know as a Catholic, I had faith that God existed. 788 00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:36,320 I had faith that there was heaven, but now I know I don't have to have faith around that 789 00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:37,320 anymore. 790 00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:41,480 I know that I will go to heaven and I know that my friends are going to be there. 791 00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:45,720 And from other people, I know the pets are going to be there. 792 00:42:45,720 --> 00:42:48,560 It's just a very joyful place. 793 00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:54,040 So go back to, if you can picture in your mind and step back to when you were in that 794 00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:58,920 heavenly place, look around, take a breath. 795 00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:00,120 What do you see? 796 00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:01,120 What did you smell? 797 00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:02,360 What did you hear? 798 00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:03,440 What put us there? 799 00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:04,440 What's it like? 800 00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:13,880 The love is the biggest thing and the rest is just, it's, it's like nothing on earth. 801 00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:20,280 In other words, there's times when I can almost, I can, I can taste that sometimes when I go 802 00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:23,400 to communion, I still sneak in and go to communion every now and then. 803 00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:29,840 And Jesus is in my heart and I, and I, it is filled with that love and it feels like 804 00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:35,120 someone's punched you in the chest and you can't breathe and like your heart is going 805 00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:36,120 to explode. 806 00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:39,640 That's a little tiny piece of heaven. 807 00:43:39,640 --> 00:43:48,040 So when you don't have a body and to experience that is indescribable. 808 00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:53,000 I remember that, that my friend was standing in front of like what appeared to be maybe 809 00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:54,360 an arched doorway. 810 00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:57,200 And I thought, that's why I asked him, why are we standing here? 811 00:43:57,200 --> 00:43:58,720 Why don't we go on the other side? 812 00:43:58,720 --> 00:44:01,800 That was because I wasn't allowed to stay. 813 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:06,720 I do believe he was showing me in the book that what I had agreed to and that I hadn't 814 00:44:06,720 --> 00:44:13,440 finished, you know, and that people are sometimes told that they have a choice. 815 00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:21,440 I wasn't, I was told I had too much left to do period and I was tossed back and I understand 816 00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:22,440 that now. 817 00:44:22,440 --> 00:44:28,200 And I've been here 23 years and I feel like I've done really very little and I've had 818 00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:34,120 two psychics see me in my 80s and 90s still kicking ass and taking names is how they put 819 00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:35,120 it. 820 00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:40,520 So I feel like I'm resigned to the fact I'll probably be here another 20 years. 821 00:44:40,520 --> 00:44:44,480 My mom is 95, my dad died at 97. 822 00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:46,840 And I'll just keep doing what I'm supposed to be doing. 823 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:53,760 And when I get the last person off my list, I get to go home and I'm looking forward to 824 00:44:53,760 --> 00:44:55,160 it and leave me. 825 00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:57,040 Yeah, I'll bet. 826 00:44:57,040 --> 00:45:01,120 So you met when you were there, you met your friend. 827 00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:06,120 Any idea what he was doing besides just saying hi to you? 828 00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:09,680 Well, he and I, like I said, we were engaged for seven years. 829 00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:12,600 We, we were, he helped raise my teenagers. 830 00:45:12,600 --> 00:45:13,600 God love him. 831 00:45:13,600 --> 00:45:14,880 Help send him to college. 832 00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:18,120 I mean, this was a significant soulmate. 833 00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:19,120 All right. 834 00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:20,960 And one of the things he was very serious. 835 00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:24,600 He was a, he was a businessman and very serious. 836 00:45:24,600 --> 00:45:26,480 He was a Scorpio, if that means anything to you. 837 00:45:26,480 --> 00:45:29,200 And I'm a Gemini, which are, you know, total airheads. 838 00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:33,160 So I, we were always playing tricks on each other, you know, and he would always say to 839 00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:38,000 me, McDaniel, I'll get you for this, you know, in a joking way. 840 00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:39,800 And I was always one up on him. 841 00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:43,840 And I think when they said we need somebody to send her back there, you know, people were 842 00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:44,840 saying, not me, not me. 843 00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:46,840 And he says, Oh, I'll do it. 844 00:45:46,840 --> 00:45:47,840 I'll do it. 845 00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:48,840 I own get her good. 846 00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,920 That'd be a fun assignment. 847 00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:56,040 I wasn't there long in a garden. 848 00:45:56,040 --> 00:45:57,560 You were in hell longer. 849 00:45:57,560 --> 00:45:58,560 Yeah. 850 00:45:58,560 --> 00:46:00,160 You said it felt like two years. 851 00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:01,160 Yeah, I did. 852 00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:03,800 Much of that, would you say felt like hell compared to heaven? 853 00:46:03,800 --> 00:46:05,480 Oh, I was in heaven. 854 00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:11,960 It felt like maybe 15 minutes, you know, before they threw me out, but I had to experience 855 00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:12,960 that. 856 00:46:12,960 --> 00:46:16,800 I, I chose to do that and it had to make it relatable. 857 00:46:16,800 --> 00:46:21,040 I had to make it an interesting story. 858 00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:22,520 Why did you have me on? 859 00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:24,680 It's a interesting story. 860 00:46:24,680 --> 00:46:31,760 So it was all planned and you and I, you know, we're soulmates at some point and said, well, 861 00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:35,040 you know, we probably won't spend much time in this incarnation together, but I'll tell 862 00:46:35,040 --> 00:46:36,040 you what we'll get. 863 00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:39,000 We'll get in touch for at least an hour and a half, two hours. 864 00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:40,280 We'll touch base. 865 00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:47,080 So I believe we plan this, this little interaction and we can cross it off our list and it's 866 00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,080 delightful. 867 00:46:48,080 --> 00:46:49,240 I just love it. 868 00:46:49,240 --> 00:46:50,960 I feel comfortable with you. 869 00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:54,600 I feel like I've known you before and I have. 870 00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:58,720 So that brings up what are your thoughts on where we were before we came here to this 871 00:46:58,720 --> 00:47:00,640 life in heaven. 872 00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,720 And then, uh, you know, I've had a past life regression. 873 00:47:03,720 --> 00:47:08,240 I got all interested in all that stuff because, uh, you know, people talk about it. 874 00:47:08,240 --> 00:47:15,640 Um, I could remember, uh, three and, and it's fun, you know, scary. 875 00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:16,880 And you kind of go, yeah, right. 876 00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:20,280 I was dreaming this, but she's got you kind of hypnotized and all that stuff. 877 00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:23,880 Um, I know I've probably been a lot of places. 878 00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:26,600 I hope I don't have to come back here again. 879 00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:34,920 Uh, somebody told me one time that, that, uh, there's a special badge award, something 880 00:47:34,920 --> 00:47:39,600 for people who have the guts to go to earth, that that's really the toughest gig you can 881 00:47:39,600 --> 00:47:41,640 do is go to earth. 882 00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:45,080 And, uh, when you're back up in heaven, I don't know if you've got a badge or something, 883 00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:47,160 but people say, oh man, you went to earth. 884 00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:48,160 I don't believe it. 885 00:47:48,160 --> 00:47:49,440 What are you telling me about it? 886 00:47:49,440 --> 00:47:50,800 You know, what was it like? 887 00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:56,680 So I kind of believe that, um, when my dad passed away from COVID a year and a half ago, 888 00:47:56,680 --> 00:47:59,680 he was a pilot in the Navy World War two. 889 00:47:59,680 --> 00:48:01,040 And he was the only one that will listen. 890 00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:02,480 Gee, he helped me write my book. 891 00:48:02,480 --> 00:48:07,680 He wrote the first chapter because he was an atheist and he got shot down over the Philippines 892 00:48:07,680 --> 00:48:11,000 and he told God, if you can get me out of this mess, he was in a burning plane. 893 00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:12,000 He couldn't get out. 894 00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:14,440 Uh, I'll become a Catholic and rest my family. 895 00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:16,920 Well, well, the Marines came and got him and saved him. 896 00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:19,080 So he always listened. 897 00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:22,200 So the last couple of years, we would talk about heaven. 898 00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:23,880 What are you going to do in heaven, dad? 899 00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:26,000 When you go and he's like, fly. 900 00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:27,960 And I said, okay, cool. 901 00:48:27,960 --> 00:48:34,800 So, um, he left me a message through my medium, um, publisher after he died. 902 00:48:34,800 --> 00:48:39,960 And, uh, I had wondered who came to get him because somebody always comes to get you. 903 00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:44,040 And usually they're up in the corners and the ceiling hospice people will tell you that. 904 00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:46,960 And I told him, look up in the corners, dad, somebody's going to come for you. 905 00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:48,680 And he's, are you sure I don't want to go over myself? 906 00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:52,000 I'm sure positive, at least one, but usually two. 907 00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:58,120 So when he was dying at home, thank God, my sister and mom and brother law also had COVID. 908 00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:00,840 So they led him out of the hospital to come home and die. 909 00:49:00,840 --> 00:49:02,520 That was a blessing. 910 00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:07,480 So he was on his last few breaths and he was getting a little antsy, but they said, you 911 00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:09,840 know, they were holding his hands and talking to him. 912 00:49:09,840 --> 00:49:14,880 And all of a sudden he stopped and he looked up at the ceiling and he got this great big 913 00:49:14,880 --> 00:49:20,480 grin on his face and his face lit up and he closed his eyes and left. 914 00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:25,520 So, um, then my family was saying, Oh, I bet they, he saw him and they saw him. 915 00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:30,480 But anyway, when I, my, my medium, uh, when we were talking about a contract, she says, 916 00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:34,680 your dad's here and went through this long thing, but he says it was his mom and sister 917 00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:35,840 that came to get him. 918 00:49:35,840 --> 00:49:38,440 He wanted you to know that is so sweet. 919 00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:39,440 That's great. 920 00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:42,640 And I think that's a great way to end our discussion today. 921 00:49:42,640 --> 00:49:44,560 Pitch the book one last time. 922 00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:45,560 Go for it. 923 00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:50,000 And miss fit in hell to have an X pad. 924 00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:55,800 Also, the words I was taught to bring back and share is for to have a good life, be 925 00:49:55,800 --> 00:50:03,600 loving and kind, merciful, forgiving, encouraging, grateful, non-judgmental and useful. 926 00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:05,120 That's all you got to do. 927 00:50:05,120 --> 00:50:06,120 Amen. 928 00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:09,640 And if you ever find yourself in hell, do what? 929 00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:14,960 Sing a Christmas carol and not read off the red nose reindeer. 930 00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:16,040 Love it. 931 00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:17,040 Thanks a lot. 932 00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:18,040 Okay. 933 00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:24,560 Thanks Eric. 934 00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:28,120 If you've had a round trip death experience and would like to share it with us, we would 935 00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:29,760 love to hear from you. 936 00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,640 Send an email to me, Eric at roundtripdeath.com. 937 00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:38,360 And lastly, if you've found this program uplifting, if it's given you just a little more hope in 938 00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:46,080 the future, share it with a friend, rate us five stars and be sure to visit roundtripdeath.com. 939 00:50:46,080 --> 00:51:11,840 Until then, I wish you everything good that you're looking for in this life and the next.