WEBVTT 00:00:03.790 --> 00:00:06.669 From the time that they pronounced me that was 00:00:06.669 --> 00:00:10.250 a good 45 minutes They cut my clothes and then 00:00:10.250 --> 00:00:13.609 they paddled my heart my heart stopped and I 00:00:13.609 --> 00:00:17.129 could see people screaming and crying But I didn't 00:00:17.129 --> 00:00:19.510 realize that was actually my physical body because 00:00:19.510 --> 00:00:22.890 I was somewhere else The only thing that I could 00:00:22.890 --> 00:00:26.809 feel if you can imagine Absolute love and peace 00:00:26.809 --> 00:00:29.829 there wasn't anything else to be felt. I was 00:00:29.829 --> 00:00:33.049 greeted by people I'd known in the past I'm back 00:00:33.049 --> 00:00:36.829 home again. Incredibly safe and felt at home. 00:00:38.909 --> 00:00:40.829 Welcome, welcome to Round Trip Death everybody. 00:00:41.289 --> 00:00:44.170 We are going to have so much fun today. We're 00:00:44.170 --> 00:00:47.829 going to the beautiful island of St. Thomas and 00:00:47.829 --> 00:00:49.770 here's the big question that we're going to have 00:00:49.770 --> 00:00:55.030 answered. What happens when an atheist has an 00:00:55.030 --> 00:00:59.380 NDE and meets Someone that makes them question 00:00:59.380 --> 00:01:01.960 everything they've thought was real in the past. 00:01:02.380 --> 00:01:05.120 Here's our special guest Riley Courtright. How 00:01:05.120 --> 00:01:08.260 are you Riley? I'm so good and better than I 00:01:08.260 --> 00:01:13.560 could possibly have ever dreamt possible. Which 00:01:13.560 --> 00:01:16.659 is so amazing since it was only what seven months 00:01:16.659 --> 00:01:20.579 ago that you actually died. It's been seven months 00:01:20.579 --> 00:01:23.480 this recent time. I've died twice in the last 00:01:23.480 --> 00:01:29.420 18 months and boy did they fuel each other. Well 00:01:29.420 --> 00:01:32.299 I'm glad you're having a fantastic morning and 00:01:32.299 --> 00:01:35.519 you're making me smile so I really appreciate 00:01:35.519 --> 00:01:39.439 that. Before we jump into your story which is 00:01:39.439 --> 00:01:42.140 people are going to absolutely love this tell 00:01:42.140 --> 00:01:45.799 us just a little bit about who Riley is or is 00:01:45.799 --> 00:01:48.040 it Lily maybe we'll get to that at some point. 00:01:48.269 --> 00:01:51.750 So I've always known myself as Riley. I'm a creative 00:01:51.750 --> 00:01:54.530 at heart, ultimately, and a type B personality. 00:01:55.290 --> 00:01:58.170 I've been a piercer for 10 years. I owned a studio. 00:01:58.569 --> 00:02:01.310 And I think it's important to note that I was 00:02:01.310 --> 00:02:04.390 raised by incredibly loving, kind parents, but 00:02:04.390 --> 00:02:07.129 who never spoke about faith. I had one parent 00:02:07.129 --> 00:02:10.409 that was very... very bluntly atheist and one 00:02:10.409 --> 00:02:13.530 who did have a higher belief in a power. But 00:02:13.530 --> 00:02:16.830 I was raised much closer to science than I ever 00:02:16.830 --> 00:02:20.189 was religion. And I also have a genetic condition 00:02:20.189 --> 00:02:24.270 called Ehlers -Danlos syndrome. So I had lost 00:02:24.270 --> 00:02:28.110 a lot of... I had lost a lot. You know, I believed 00:02:28.110 --> 00:02:31.469 that I wanted to want to believe in God. I'm 00:02:31.469 --> 00:02:34.729 getting ahead of myself now, aren't I? It's okay. 00:02:34.919 --> 00:02:37.699 It's okay. And by the way, this is, I think, 00:02:37.800 --> 00:02:39.800 the first time you've really shared this publicly, 00:02:40.020 --> 00:02:42.800 isn't it? It is. It really is. It is. It is. 00:02:42.900 --> 00:02:46.360 It's interesting how connected and how complex, 00:02:46.360 --> 00:02:51.740 right? But how truly connected it all is. I knew 00:02:51.740 --> 00:02:54.800 that my genetics held a shorter lifespan from 00:02:54.800 --> 00:02:58.340 the time that I was a young kid. So while I wanted 00:02:58.340 --> 00:03:02.050 to want to believe in God, There was nothing 00:03:02.050 --> 00:03:04.490 throughout my life to ever show me that that 00:03:04.490 --> 00:03:07.949 was that that was real. And I was always really 00:03:07.949 --> 00:03:11.069 healthy until I wasn't. And I started to get 00:03:11.069 --> 00:03:15.270 sick at 28. I'm 35 now. And that is, I think, 00:03:15.330 --> 00:03:20.009 really where everything kind of begins. OK, well, 00:03:20.229 --> 00:03:23.090 let's do this. First of all, before we talked 00:03:23.090 --> 00:03:26.580 the other day, I had never heard of EDS. Would 00:03:26.580 --> 00:03:28.740 love to start sort of at the beginning if you 00:03:28.740 --> 00:03:31.439 would give a very brief explanation of what it 00:03:31.439 --> 00:03:34.060 is and by the way I did hit it hard on Google 00:03:34.060 --> 00:03:38.360 since then But if you get a very give a very 00:03:38.360 --> 00:03:42.419 brief explanation of what it is how it affected 00:03:42.419 --> 00:03:47.210 you and how it led to these two incidents Sure. 00:03:47.909 --> 00:03:51.469 Well, EDS is a connective tissue disorder. Your 00:03:51.469 --> 00:03:56.069 connective tissue is what creates and supports 00:03:56.069 --> 00:03:58.310 the collagen in your body, which is what keeps 00:03:58.310 --> 00:04:01.370 your organs together. So I was always really 00:04:01.370 --> 00:04:06.349 flexible as a kid in very unique ways, right? 00:04:06.610 --> 00:04:10.129 Not realizing that my insides, my organs were 00:04:10.129 --> 00:04:13.949 able to do that too. So there's many subtypes 00:04:13.949 --> 00:04:17.920 of EDS. I have vascular EDS. which is fatal but 00:04:17.920 --> 00:04:20.759 I do have complex hypermobile tendencies with 00:04:20.759 --> 00:04:23.800 that and EDS is something that we think has been 00:04:23.800 --> 00:04:26.939 around for a long time but hasn't been diagnosed 00:04:26.939 --> 00:04:30.439 until recently truly because of how many you 00:04:30.439 --> 00:04:32.959 really don't find out until autopsies right I 00:04:32.959 --> 00:04:34.800 had always known I was gonna donate my body to 00:04:34.800 --> 00:04:37.560 science my mom did the same thing because it 00:04:37.560 --> 00:04:41.649 causes your body to to die from the inside out, 00:04:41.910 --> 00:04:45.110 right? And my organs would fuse together, they 00:04:45.110 --> 00:04:47.990 would just cease to function. I mean, all kinds 00:04:47.990 --> 00:04:50.550 of things and there's no known cause, but it's 00:04:50.550 --> 00:04:53.389 ultimately your connective tissue. Wasn't there 00:04:53.389 --> 00:04:55.610 anything that medical science could do for it? 00:04:55.949 --> 00:04:59.750 I was told that I wasn't eligible for an organ 00:04:59.750 --> 00:05:02.750 transplant because it's a connective tissue disorder 00:05:02.750 --> 00:05:05.730 that my body would basically destroy any new 00:05:05.730 --> 00:05:08.769 organ that I got. So, you know, I would go into 00:05:08.769 --> 00:05:10.709 kidney failure. They'd pull me out of kidney 00:05:10.709 --> 00:05:13.529 failure and send me on my way. My heart would 00:05:13.529 --> 00:05:15.709 stop at home. My husband would resuscitate me, 00:05:15.790 --> 00:05:17.670 rush me to the hospital, and they'd say, come 00:05:17.670 --> 00:05:22.170 back if it happens again. I was bleeding internally 00:05:22.170 --> 00:05:25.750 so severely at one point. It was coming out of 00:05:25.750 --> 00:05:30.810 my eyes and my ears and, you know, all they do 00:05:30.810 --> 00:05:32.850 is they put me on more medications and they made 00:05:32.850 --> 00:05:35.110 me a guinea pig and it's more testing. And what 00:05:35.110 --> 00:05:37.170 they did was they took away my quality of life 00:05:37.170 --> 00:05:40.389 because I ended up slowly and painfully dying, 00:05:40.389 --> 00:05:43.269 right, in a wheelchair and on oxygen. I spent 00:05:43.269 --> 00:05:45.269 more time in the hospital than I spent anywhere 00:05:45.269 --> 00:05:48.449 else. But no, it was only when I decided to give 00:05:48.449 --> 00:05:53.120 it all up that God came to my rescue. Okay, after 00:05:53.120 --> 00:05:56.000 we talk about your NDEs, I want to talk just 00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:57.800 a little bit, and I'm telling you this so you 00:05:57.800 --> 00:06:01.000 remind me if I forget, a little bit about how 00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:04.019 you've gotten so better over the last few months. 00:06:04.579 --> 00:06:06.860 Replaced my heart and my lungs. I know that sounds 00:06:06.860 --> 00:06:10.199 crazy, but like he even told me that. I mean, 00:06:10.259 --> 00:06:12.779 and there's, there's no mistaking. There's no, 00:06:13.060 --> 00:06:17.500 there is no... As an atheist, for example, my 00:06:17.500 --> 00:06:20.339 brother is a nanoparticle physicist, right? And 00:06:20.339 --> 00:06:22.240 so when you're raised close to the sciences, 00:06:22.660 --> 00:06:24.899 you believe in the things that you can see and 00:06:24.899 --> 00:06:27.420 touch and hear and smell. But let me tell you, 00:06:27.480 --> 00:06:31.819 Eric, I smelled and tasted and saw God. So he 00:06:31.819 --> 00:06:34.740 cured me. I still have a lot of physical therapy, 00:06:34.899 --> 00:06:38.579 like, sure. But like, no, it was when I died 00:06:38.579 --> 00:06:40.740 and came back to life. It was like overnight. 00:06:40.860 --> 00:06:43.579 But yes, I'm sorry. See, now I'm I do like it. 00:06:43.639 --> 00:06:47.199 This is, it's, I should just go away and let 00:06:47.199 --> 00:06:50.180 you do your thing for an hour here. It'd be a 00:06:50.180 --> 00:06:53.199 much better show. You were telling me you actually 00:06:53.199 --> 00:06:56.040 went to St. Thomas to die, to have a great place 00:06:56.040 --> 00:07:03.379 to die. I did. So after goodness. So the first 00:07:03.379 --> 00:07:08.040 NDE I think was was confusing for me because 00:07:08.040 --> 00:07:10.800 I hadn't been declared dead. It happened when 00:07:10.800 --> 00:07:13.600 I was at home. I had just been sent from the 00:07:13.600 --> 00:07:16.560 hospital of them basically saying, here's more 00:07:16.560 --> 00:07:19.060 meds, there's really nothing we can do. Medicine 00:07:19.060 --> 00:07:24.639 doesn't beat genetics. Man, both times I woke 00:07:24.639 --> 00:07:28.839 up and I knew the day that was my last day. And 00:07:28.839 --> 00:07:32.579 it didn't, it wasn't as like concerning as you 00:07:32.579 --> 00:07:36.519 might think. I woke up to the most incredible 00:07:36.519 --> 00:07:40.680 music and I can only describe it as a symphony 00:07:40.680 --> 00:07:45.180 of orchestras harmonizing together and it was 00:07:45.180 --> 00:07:48.680 harps and trumpets and violins and violas and 00:07:48.680 --> 00:07:51.420 flutes and and so many of the instruments were 00:07:51.420 --> 00:07:54.279 instruments that we don't have on earth and I 00:07:54.279 --> 00:07:57.620 immediately woke my husband up to make sure that 00:07:57.620 --> 00:08:00.810 he couldn't hear it to see if he could hear it 00:08:00.810 --> 00:08:04.089 he couldn't and over the course of hours it became 00:08:04.089 --> 00:08:10.230 deafening and it was so beautiful it was so intrinsic 00:08:10.230 --> 00:08:15.529 and and captivating and you know dying is a funny 00:08:15.529 --> 00:08:19.639 thing because it all sort of happens at once 00:08:19.639 --> 00:08:22.379 right the moment that you realize your soul has 00:08:22.379 --> 00:08:24.639 left your body and that you're not a body with 00:08:24.639 --> 00:08:27.459 a soul rather a soul with the body right the 00:08:27.459 --> 00:08:31.699 moment it leaves the music the colors that you 00:08:31.699 --> 00:08:36.519 that you see it all happens so quick so i guess 00:08:36.519 --> 00:08:42.919 it starts at home i had been in and out of consciousness 00:08:42.919 --> 00:08:45.639 for days right because as you're dying you're 00:08:45.639 --> 00:08:51.139 not coherent the whole time and I was down to 00:08:51.139 --> 00:08:53.639 about a breath every four minutes. You know, 00:08:53.679 --> 00:08:56.120 we had decided that I wanted to die at home and 00:08:56.120 --> 00:08:58.460 not in a hospital, so I'm like peacefully in 00:08:58.460 --> 00:09:02.519 my little meditation spot, but it was also a 00:09:02.519 --> 00:09:05.519 spot that I could lay down and go peacefully, 00:09:05.519 --> 00:09:09.879 right? And from the music, I guess, because the 00:09:09.879 --> 00:09:14.960 music was the first thing, there was this incredibly 00:09:14.960 --> 00:09:20.210 loud voice it was the voice of God and he asked 00:09:20.210 --> 00:09:25.169 me what do I believe and it comes like there 00:09:25.169 --> 00:09:28.730 is a megaphone right I mean except it's inside 00:09:28.730 --> 00:09:33.070 your head it's so loud but in the most it not 00:09:33.070 --> 00:09:38.250 in a loud way in a captivating way and it's calm 00:09:38.250 --> 00:09:43.429 and it's deep and it's familiar You know, I say 00:09:43.429 --> 00:09:45.289 that people who those those the people that believe 00:09:45.289 --> 00:09:47.710 we're in a simulation like what I heard would 00:09:47.710 --> 00:09:52.830 have driven them to the end because it I mean 00:09:52.830 --> 00:09:58.690 it's And he started he starts talking to me I 00:09:58.690 --> 00:10:02.269 Had been I like I said, I really wanted to believe 00:10:02.269 --> 00:10:06.710 in a God But did I? Absolutely not, right? I 00:10:06.710 --> 00:10:08.889 had tried to be a good person my whole life and 00:10:08.889 --> 00:10:11.490 all I was met with was seeing terrible things 00:10:11.490 --> 00:10:13.669 around me and people dying and questions with 00:10:13.669 --> 00:10:17.590 no answers and, you know, terrible people who 00:10:17.590 --> 00:10:20.629 great things happen to, right? My awareness of 00:10:20.629 --> 00:10:24.409 it all just couldn't explain a God. So first 00:10:24.409 --> 00:10:26.870 of all, what did you answer when you were asked 00:10:26.870 --> 00:10:29.529 that question about what do you believe? That 00:10:29.529 --> 00:10:32.879 I believed in the power of light and love. I 00:10:32.879 --> 00:10:37.100 think the only thing that kept me from potentially 00:10:37.100 --> 00:10:41.320 committing suicide years before you know because 00:10:41.320 --> 00:10:45.299 I had lost from the time before I was 30 I had 00:10:45.299 --> 00:10:47.980 lost my grandparents and cousins aunts uncles 00:10:47.980 --> 00:10:50.879 both parents my first husband my best friend 00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:54.000 right like while all the worst people I knew 00:10:54.000 --> 00:10:56.759 were thriving right that really really gives 00:10:56.759 --> 00:11:00.990 to you And dying gets to finding out that you 00:11:00.990 --> 00:11:04.330 can try to be a good person and all you get is 00:11:04.330 --> 00:11:08.269 the sickness, right? I'm so sorry, because now 00:11:08.269 --> 00:11:11.809 I feel like I'm catty -cornering, walling myself. 00:11:12.700 --> 00:11:15.039 I said I believed in the power of love. That's 00:11:15.039 --> 00:11:17.279 really, that's what I said because with all the 00:11:17.279 --> 00:11:19.519 people dying around me, I did. I wanted to believe 00:11:19.519 --> 00:11:21.139 in God because I wanted to believe that they 00:11:21.139 --> 00:11:24.340 were angels. After my first husband died, I could 00:11:24.340 --> 00:11:26.480 have sworn I heard him talk to me once and he 00:11:26.480 --> 00:11:28.259 said that my purpose was to bring more light 00:11:28.259 --> 00:11:30.679 into the world and I took that and I ran with 00:11:30.679 --> 00:11:32.919 it. So I said I believed in the power of light 00:11:32.919 --> 00:11:36.179 and the power of love. From there it felt like 00:11:36.179 --> 00:11:38.500 traveling. I think that's what people describe 00:11:38.500 --> 00:11:40.840 as a tunnel, but it really felt like a wormhole, 00:11:40.860 --> 00:11:44.299 like a cosmic wormhole, and it opened up into 00:11:44.299 --> 00:11:49.379 this the most beautiful little box. It was pearlescent 00:11:49.379 --> 00:11:52.720 and golden and filigreed and it opened up into 00:11:52.720 --> 00:11:56.080 this blast of color that doesn't even exist to 00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:59.200 the human naked eye. We can't even see a fraction 00:11:59.200 --> 00:12:04.809 of that. And I got from there, you get this This 00:12:04.809 --> 00:12:08.590 blast of what feels like telepathic answers and 00:12:08.590 --> 00:12:10.809 this was another moment I definitely knew I was 00:12:10.809 --> 00:12:14.090 dying right because I got to suddenly in the 00:12:14.090 --> 00:12:17.309 blink of an eye learn everything about myself 00:12:17.309 --> 00:12:20.389 my quirks my personality my character traits 00:12:20.389 --> 00:12:23.330 my metaphorical gifts that you're given along 00:12:23.330 --> 00:12:26.149 through life and if you've served your purpose 00:12:26.149 --> 00:12:29.500 and what was making me so sick and You know, 00:12:29.500 --> 00:12:32.360 it jumped into every other question I've ever 00:12:32.360 --> 00:12:35.840 wondered. Do we have free will? Why do good things 00:12:35.840 --> 00:12:39.580 happen to bad people? And why do kids get cancer? 00:12:39.860 --> 00:12:42.399 And if old souls are real, and why does a song 00:12:42.399 --> 00:12:45.480 get stuck in our head? And what is deja vu, right? 00:12:45.500 --> 00:12:48.419 Like all of it, it all gets answered at the speed 00:12:48.419 --> 00:12:51.639 of light. I got to see and talk to everybody 00:12:51.639 --> 00:12:54.379 I knew who loved and died. And it was like a 00:12:54.379 --> 00:12:56.259 Christmas carol because they each had something 00:12:56.259 --> 00:12:59.539 different to teach me and to show me. And just 00:12:59.539 --> 00:13:01.700 like that my husband said this train isn't for 00:13:01.700 --> 00:13:07.519 you to get on and I came back and all of a sudden 00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:12.210 my husband who I think in hindsight was experiencing 00:13:12.210 --> 00:13:15.470 an SDE because he looked into some portal of 00:13:15.470 --> 00:13:17.250 the fabric of the universe and heard something 00:13:17.250 --> 00:13:20.149 that I heard because he said, do you want to 00:13:20.149 --> 00:13:22.029 go to the hospital? It's not time for you to 00:13:22.029 --> 00:13:24.289 get on that train yet. And so for a minute, I'm 00:13:24.289 --> 00:13:26.029 like mind blown because I'm like, what did you 00:13:26.029 --> 00:13:28.190 just say? Because like my dead husband just said 00:13:28.190 --> 00:13:30.590 like the same thing to me, but I know you didn't 00:13:30.590 --> 00:13:33.190 hear that. Right. And like, wait, was I sitting? 00:13:33.350 --> 00:13:35.370 Was I conscious? And he's like, no, you hadn't 00:13:35.370 --> 00:13:37.690 been breathing for almost six minutes. I thought 00:13:37.690 --> 00:13:39.830 it was supposed to like. you go until I like 00:13:39.830 --> 00:13:42.590 heard that I wasn't so we take me to the hospital 00:13:42.590 --> 00:13:44.649 and then the music starts right because for days 00:13:44.649 --> 00:13:49.769 all I could hear is music and the nurses the 00:13:49.769 --> 00:13:52.009 nurses and the doctors they get you better until 00:13:52.009 --> 00:13:54.750 until they send you back right because it's a 00:13:54.750 --> 00:13:59.049 genetic fatal ailment with no cure and no real 00:13:59.049 --> 00:14:02.929 treatment And God made it really clear that we 00:14:02.929 --> 00:14:05.190 were supposed to come here, and when we tried 00:14:05.190 --> 00:14:07.289 to fight that and decide we would spend the last 00:14:07.289 --> 00:14:09.690 year of my life going out west, our barn burned 00:14:09.690 --> 00:14:11.789 down and we got a single lightning strike to 00:14:11.789 --> 00:14:15.090 our brand new RV. So God was like, no, no, you 00:14:15.090 --> 00:14:20.350 go to St. Thomas. Very subtle. We've been here 00:14:20.350 --> 00:14:23.570 now, which is beautiful. And it is hard to describe 00:14:23.570 --> 00:14:25.990 the timing of how it all happened because when 00:14:25.990 --> 00:14:28.409 I was in the hospital did come with a lot of 00:14:28.409 --> 00:14:32.350 OBEs. I distinctly remember being overhead, you 00:14:32.350 --> 00:14:34.990 know, and hearing the doctor tell my husband 00:14:34.990 --> 00:14:37.149 to say his final goodbye and make sure that my 00:14:37.149 --> 00:14:39.250 will was in order and that the dialysis didn't 00:14:39.250 --> 00:14:42.490 seem to be working and that the CDC was also 00:14:42.490 --> 00:14:45.950 monitoring my case because it's a rare ailment, 00:14:46.110 --> 00:14:48.519 right? Like all these different things. And so 00:14:48.519 --> 00:14:54.220 it is hard to know like this part happened when 00:14:54.220 --> 00:14:56.639 I was unconscious at home and this part happened 00:14:56.639 --> 00:14:58.500 when I was unconscious in the hospital, right? 00:14:58.620 --> 00:15:01.679 But there was, there was such an influx of peace 00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:04.759 and love. I had been in screaming pain for months, 00:15:04.840 --> 00:15:07.120 and I mean literally screaming pain for months 00:15:07.120 --> 00:15:10.639 with blood coming out of my eyes. And when you 00:15:10.639 --> 00:15:13.659 go, like the actual dying process is beautiful 00:15:13.659 --> 00:15:16.559 because it's this weightlessness that you can... 00:15:16.759 --> 00:15:21.919 feel. It's this laying in a perfectly warm sun 00:15:21.919 --> 00:15:24.740 patch, right? Like you can feel that overwhelming 00:15:24.740 --> 00:15:29.259 amount of love. It was everything about how connected 00:15:29.259 --> 00:15:33.299 we are and about how far off we've come because 00:15:33.299 --> 00:15:37.259 of religion and science and it felt like I was 00:15:37.259 --> 00:15:41.289 supposed to do more. But we moved to st. Thomas 00:15:41.289 --> 00:15:45.350 and I was better right for a little bit But you're 00:15:45.350 --> 00:15:47.789 still very aware that you're dying when you're 00:15:47.789 --> 00:15:50.470 actually sick You can feel as your kidneys stop 00:15:50.470 --> 00:15:52.610 functioning and they're on low function You can 00:15:52.610 --> 00:15:55.149 feel when you're in slow heart failure like you 00:15:55.149 --> 00:15:58.250 you can I? Thought that I was supposed to like 00:15:58.250 --> 00:16:01.789 find someone here or talk to someone do something 00:16:01.789 --> 00:16:09.830 until I died again Yeah, so you were doing a 00:16:09.830 --> 00:16:12.850 little better after the first NDE and then your 00:16:12.850 --> 00:16:15.350 health went back downhill after a few months 00:16:15.350 --> 00:16:18.970 until seven months ago. What were you feeling 00:16:18.970 --> 00:16:21.409 on that day? Did you hear the music again that 00:16:21.409 --> 00:16:25.429 particular day? I woke up and I knew that it 00:16:25.429 --> 00:16:27.909 was going to be the last day on earth, which 00:16:27.909 --> 00:16:32.450 is a very weird like knowing, right? It is weird. 00:16:32.720 --> 00:16:35.860 I just knew. And I called my husband who was 00:16:35.860 --> 00:16:37.919 at work. He was only working part -time and he 00:16:37.919 --> 00:16:39.899 had taken off for years, right? Because we had 00:16:39.899 --> 00:16:41.980 to stop working to sell the house. He was my 00:16:41.980 --> 00:16:44.200 caretaker when I got sick. So I called him because 00:16:44.200 --> 00:16:46.700 he does maintenance where we live. And I said, 00:16:46.840 --> 00:16:49.899 this is going to sound crazy, but I think I'm 00:16:49.899 --> 00:16:52.240 in terminal lucidity. And he's like, okay. And 00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:55.019 he comes home. And as soon as he came home, I 00:16:55.019 --> 00:16:58.740 heard trumpets. And I was like, there it is. 00:16:59.960 --> 00:17:04.339 So I heard trumpets. I didn't hear music. Those 00:17:04.339 --> 00:17:07.559 trumpets are indistinguishable and it sounds 00:17:07.559 --> 00:17:09.579 like they're being played through a megaphone. 00:17:09.619 --> 00:17:14.000 I mean, it's so loud. Were they the kind of trumpets 00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:17.880 like a fanfare, like a doo -doo -doo -doo kind 00:17:17.880 --> 00:17:21.019 of thing? yeah like old like think of old medieval 00:17:21.019 --> 00:17:24.839 ones but they're but they different still i don't 00:17:24.839 --> 00:17:26.900 even know if we have these trumpets on earth 00:17:26.900 --> 00:17:28.819 i gotta tell you they're the most beautiful sounding 00:17:28.819 --> 00:17:31.660 and as somebody who didn't before love brass 00:17:31.660 --> 00:17:34.559 instruments right like it's the trumpet's not 00:17:34.559 --> 00:17:37.619 necessarily the most appeasing of sounds but 00:17:37.619 --> 00:17:39.539 no these are they're incredible i could listen 00:17:39.539 --> 00:17:44.990 to them all day goodness i I knew and I felt 00:17:44.990 --> 00:17:47.710 fine, right? At that point, God had taken away 00:17:47.710 --> 00:17:50.630 all my pain. Like yes, I still had mobility aids 00:17:50.630 --> 00:17:55.829 and breathing aids, but I didn't feel sick. I 00:17:55.829 --> 00:17:58.730 just was aware that I was dying. And I think 00:17:58.730 --> 00:18:01.769 that's really where all the magic happened, right? 00:18:02.609 --> 00:18:05.519 Because... I had learned so much in my first 00:18:05.519 --> 00:18:08.500 NDE about myself and humans and how connected 00:18:08.500 --> 00:18:11.000 it is, there being no such thing as coincidence 00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:14.079 and reincarnation and the chosen and heaven and 00:18:14.079 --> 00:18:16.220 hell, which is something I think I do have to 00:18:16.220 --> 00:18:20.259 talk a little bit about, but there was no fear. 00:18:21.720 --> 00:18:24.880 But it had occurred to me over the last year 00:18:24.880 --> 00:18:27.900 that Jesus had never been mentioned. So I still 00:18:27.900 --> 00:18:31.079 wondered, okay cool, creator's real, source is 00:18:31.079 --> 00:18:33.349 real. He told me he doesn't like the word God, 00:18:33.410 --> 00:18:35.710 but like it's what we came up with. Cool. Roll 00:18:35.710 --> 00:18:39.130 with the punches. And I asked my husband to baptize 00:18:39.130 --> 00:18:41.809 me in the bathtub, and I think that it was honestly 00:18:41.809 --> 00:18:45.710 a sh - it was a reach. It was like... Well, I 00:18:45.710 --> 00:18:47.650 know God is real, and I spent most of my life 00:18:47.650 --> 00:18:50.509 convinced that he wasn't, right? So let me just 00:18:50.509 --> 00:18:55.410 like take a stab. And after he baptized me, Jesus 00:18:55.410 --> 00:18:58.890 did appear to me, and he covered me in his blood, 00:18:59.369 --> 00:19:06.569 and it was the most... beautiful gory but glorious 00:19:06.569 --> 00:19:11.210 thing. And then I got shown my parents and it 00:19:11.210 --> 00:19:14.049 was more real than anything else than my husband 00:19:14.049 --> 00:19:16.700 standing in front of me. 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He was only there 00:20:36.880 --> 00:20:40.539 for a moment, and I sort of just knew that I 00:20:40.539 --> 00:20:44.680 was supposed to take my dog on a last walk, which 00:20:44.680 --> 00:20:48.819 may seem strange. I'm a dog person. Oh, my dog 00:20:48.819 --> 00:20:50.500 came to visit me the first time I died, too, 00:20:50.559 --> 00:20:53.140 so all dogs go to heaven, which is awesome, right? 00:20:53.769 --> 00:20:57.029 When I took my dog on his last walk, on my last 00:20:57.029 --> 00:20:59.890 walk with him, I picked him up and I showed him 00:20:59.890 --> 00:21:03.029 this beautiful view of St. Thomas. And I said, 00:21:03.109 --> 00:21:05.569 isn't this the most beautiful thing you've ever 00:21:05.569 --> 00:21:08.589 seen? And he never took his little pug eyes off 00:21:08.589 --> 00:21:14.029 of me. And he said, it really is. And it's almost 00:21:14.029 --> 00:21:17.930 like it was a gift. It was a gift from Jesus 00:21:17.930 --> 00:21:19.750 telling me the magic is real, right? And all 00:21:19.750 --> 00:21:22.849 these things are real. When I died the first 00:21:22.849 --> 00:21:24.569 time everybody came and talked to me, right? 00:21:24.849 --> 00:21:27.710 My mom, my dad, my best friend, my husband. But 00:21:27.710 --> 00:21:30.009 over the course of the next year, I couldn't 00:21:30.009 --> 00:21:32.130 remember the specifics about what they talked 00:21:32.130 --> 00:21:34.710 about. I just knew that they came and talked 00:21:34.710 --> 00:21:38.069 to me. And the second time, in Terminal Lucidity 00:21:38.069 --> 00:21:43.910 Hits, you get everything back. I mean, I remembered 00:21:43.910 --> 00:21:47.769 being born. I remembered every experience, every 00:21:47.769 --> 00:21:53.099 thought, everything. Terminal lucidity very much 00:21:53.099 --> 00:21:57.480 is being in both realms at once, right? You can 00:21:57.480 --> 00:22:01.319 see and feel the tether. You're able to like 00:22:01.319 --> 00:22:04.400 overhear this phone line that belongs in heaven. 00:22:04.539 --> 00:22:08.339 You're able to start to get this rush of information. 00:22:09.400 --> 00:22:11.880 But it became very clear at that moment that, 00:22:11.880 --> 00:22:14.200 you know, I needed to go home and actually like 00:22:14.200 --> 00:22:17.019 take my final lay down. I feel like I'm talking 00:22:17.019 --> 00:22:19.359 a lot. I'm sorry. I should stop. Should I stop? 00:22:19.440 --> 00:22:21.359 Don't want to interrupt because you're doing 00:22:21.359 --> 00:22:24.099 well So you just keep going for a little bit 00:22:24.099 --> 00:22:25.920 and then I have a couple of questions for you 00:22:25.920 --> 00:22:28.559 I started to get this flood of information because 00:22:28.559 --> 00:22:30.859 I realized this is I need to go lay down right 00:22:30.859 --> 00:22:33.839 like the big the big lay down So I'm walking 00:22:33.839 --> 00:22:36.200 my dog back and this is very short right because 00:22:36.200 --> 00:22:39.339 I live in a complex as I'm walking back to lay 00:22:39.339 --> 00:22:41.960 down I start getting information again almost 00:22:41.960 --> 00:22:44.039 like the speed of light like I did the first 00:22:44.039 --> 00:22:48.950 time but I was still alive It really was like 00:22:48.950 --> 00:22:51.569 I could talk to my parents real time, asking 00:22:51.569 --> 00:22:55.150 about where they were, because if I was dying 00:22:55.150 --> 00:22:58.349 for good, it wasn't, there's the dying process, 00:22:58.349 --> 00:23:01.190 and then there's the being dead process, right? 00:23:01.609 --> 00:23:05.470 I got to learn a little bit more about the layers 00:23:05.470 --> 00:23:09.490 and the levels. It's all happening so quick, 00:23:09.650 --> 00:23:13.009 right? And I go to lay in bed, and I close my 00:23:13.009 --> 00:23:16.210 eyes, and you can feel as your eyes are opening. 00:23:16.490 --> 00:23:18.650 We ever notice that when people die, their eyes 00:23:18.650 --> 00:23:22.289 open and then somebody has to come along and 00:23:22.289 --> 00:23:25.970 that's what the movies always do. Yeah. So as 00:23:25.970 --> 00:23:27.650 a caretaker for two parents that have passed 00:23:27.650 --> 00:23:30.230 away, yeah, it happens. It's a reflex. It's one 00:23:30.230 --> 00:23:32.650 I've always wondered about. I've always been 00:23:32.650 --> 00:23:36.369 curious about it. He started to show me it wasn't 00:23:36.369 --> 00:23:39.930 about me anymore or Earth or the people in it. 00:23:39.930 --> 00:23:43.210 It was about how it all tied in together. I got 00:23:43.210 --> 00:23:45.890 to see the start of it. I got to see him create 00:23:45.890 --> 00:23:48.829 the earth, the first people that walked it, the 00:23:48.829 --> 00:23:51.109 evolution that happens inside of it. I got to 00:23:51.109 --> 00:23:54.569 see the flood, the pyramids, but not just of 00:23:54.569 --> 00:23:57.569 our dimension of all. And there's so many more 00:23:57.569 --> 00:24:01.049 than 12, right? All of everything mystical and 00:24:01.049 --> 00:24:05.009 mythical and how it all can exist at the same 00:24:05.009 --> 00:24:08.109 time. And your eyes, yeah, your eyes kind of 00:24:08.109 --> 00:24:12.579 open. I remember being ripped down for I think 00:24:12.579 --> 00:24:15.920 it was adrenaline. So medics came to my house 00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:20.579 because our neighbors had smelled decomp. And 00:24:20.579 --> 00:24:24.180 so they came and checked me out and agreed, like, 00:24:24.299 --> 00:24:25.819 you're dying. Are you sure you want to die at 00:24:25.819 --> 00:24:27.200 home? And I'm like, well, I sure as hell don't 00:24:27.200 --> 00:24:28.859 want to die in a hospital if I'm not already 00:24:28.859 --> 00:24:30.880 dying right now. And they made sure I wasn't 00:24:30.880 --> 00:24:34.410 in pain. And they waited outside. and so I lay 00:24:34.410 --> 00:24:37.710 on my husband's lap well aware that he is just 00:24:37.710 --> 00:24:40.230 monitoring me but the sweet man has not slept 00:24:40.230 --> 00:24:43.609 in a very long time and I knew that I was allowed 00:24:43.609 --> 00:24:48.930 to like wait until he went to sleep sort of gosh 00:24:48.930 --> 00:24:50.930 it's all kind of confusing to explain how that 00:24:50.930 --> 00:24:58.630 happens but when I when I died I instantly shot 00:24:58.630 --> 00:25:03.309 up to God And there was no mistaking that's where 00:25:03.309 --> 00:25:09.789 I was. He is bigger than the cosmos. I got to 00:25:09.789 --> 00:25:12.829 wrap my arms around his neck. I got to sit in 00:25:12.829 --> 00:25:16.890 his lap. I got to play by his ankles. I got to 00:25:16.890 --> 00:25:19.410 go with him to work, it felt like. I got to watch 00:25:19.410 --> 00:25:23.289 him expand the universe. I got to watch him build 00:25:23.289 --> 00:25:26.160 the next... The next earth that we're all gonna 00:25:26.160 --> 00:25:29.240 be on, he showed me, he let me explore heaven 00:25:29.240 --> 00:25:31.539 and the Garden of Eden. He let me go through 00:25:31.539 --> 00:25:36.059 black holes and white holes. He explained, it 00:25:36.059 --> 00:25:40.160 was, it's everything. You get every bit of information 00:25:40.160 --> 00:25:43.440 that's ever existed in the universe all at once. 00:25:44.259 --> 00:25:48.259 It was like you understand literally everything. 00:25:48.339 --> 00:25:50.619 There's no way to describe it other than you 00:25:50.619 --> 00:25:54.839 have. It's like he shares everything with you 00:25:54.839 --> 00:25:57.660 and I remember learning about a lot of universal 00:25:57.660 --> 00:26:00.700 laws about how I could go to heaven to recharge 00:26:00.700 --> 00:26:03.339 but that there is a respect for the human brain 00:26:03.339 --> 00:26:05.240 that you don't get to remember like the inside 00:26:05.240 --> 00:26:07.640 of heaven right you get to like keep certain 00:26:07.640 --> 00:26:09.980 bits and same with like the detail on God's face 00:26:09.980 --> 00:26:13.539 like I can tell you he's blue but like his facial 00:26:13.539 --> 00:26:16.539 like you don't get to remember it you know but 00:26:16.539 --> 00:26:20.059 I did I it was like Got to see the past and the 00:26:20.059 --> 00:26:22.319 present in the future. I got to see I got to 00:26:22.319 --> 00:26:27.200 see everything I mean Everything and then he 00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:30.039 he told me that he was giving me a new heart 00:26:30.039 --> 00:26:33.720 and lungs and the next thing that I remember 00:26:33.720 --> 00:26:36.480 is my husband kissing me because he had been 00:26:36.480 --> 00:26:38.740 holding on he had been holding on to my cold 00:26:38.740 --> 00:26:41.200 dead body for an hour not ready to let the medics 00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:43.599 take it and When he was finally ready to let 00:26:43.599 --> 00:26:46.339 them take my body. He kissed me one last time 00:26:46.339 --> 00:26:49.529 and I took a breath And that's like I went from 00:26:49.529 --> 00:26:52.390 being with God to like with my husband in these 00:26:52.390 --> 00:26:54.750 medics and everybody is like shocked and terrified 00:26:54.750 --> 00:26:57.509 because they're like what the right and I'm like 00:26:57.509 --> 00:27:01.049 and the first breath that I took was the cleanest 00:27:01.049 --> 00:27:03.269 breath I've ever taken there was nothing wrong 00:27:03.269 --> 00:27:06.289 with my heart anymore my lungs were great my 00:27:06.289 --> 00:27:09.710 kidneys my liver I was hungry I knew that I could 00:27:09.710 --> 00:27:14.009 get up and go to the bathroom and and I I had 00:27:14.009 --> 00:27:17.599 been healed and I knew it, I knew it right then 00:27:17.599 --> 00:27:20.839 and I felt like I could run a marathon so they 00:27:20.839 --> 00:27:23.000 rushed me to the hospital and they do a bunch 00:27:23.000 --> 00:27:27.220 of tests and they're like we can't explain this 00:27:27.220 --> 00:27:30.039 but you look like a healthy 33 year old 34 year 00:27:30.039 --> 00:27:33.539 old like your organs look good We can't see the 00:27:33.539 --> 00:27:36.099 past trauma anymore from heart attacks, from 00:27:36.099 --> 00:27:39.079 strokes, signs of internal bleeding. Like there's 00:27:39.079 --> 00:27:42.819 no, you look, you're great. Like we have read 00:27:42.819 --> 00:27:44.839 about this, we don't understand it, but like 00:27:44.839 --> 00:27:47.359 what can I do for you? And I was like nothing 00:27:47.359 --> 00:27:50.460 because I knew that going from 40 medications, 00:27:50.519 --> 00:27:52.960 like I knew I wasn't meant to take medicine anymore. 00:27:53.480 --> 00:27:55.240 And so I said nothing, like I don't want anything. 00:27:55.420 --> 00:27:57.599 I just like the medics want to know I'm not a 00:27:57.599 --> 00:28:00.359 zombie, I guess, right? and they let me go and 00:28:00.359 --> 00:28:02.819 it's been seven months and I do yoga and I do 00:28:02.819 --> 00:28:06.359 ballet and and I go hiking and I can eat anything 00:28:06.359 --> 00:28:09.680 I want when I hadn't eaten in like months like 00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:12.220 feeding tubes are no joke and I'm healthy now 00:28:12.220 --> 00:28:15.279 and it's um it's been crazy to make sense of 00:28:15.279 --> 00:28:20.900 because I came back with a lot of understanding 00:28:20.900 --> 00:28:22.579 of things that there's no way that that could 00:28:22.579 --> 00:28:25.480 be real or right things that about stem cells 00:28:25.480 --> 00:28:28.920 and and you know all these things and and then 00:28:28.920 --> 00:28:32.660 they start turning out to be true and it's it's 00:28:32.660 --> 00:28:36.380 even crazier because that means that if a lot 00:28:36.380 --> 00:28:38.880 of what I saw has already been studied and proven 00:28:38.880 --> 00:28:42.559 then this other stuff I saw the things that are 00:28:42.559 --> 00:28:46.299 coming our way and the next earth and the fact 00:28:46.299 --> 00:28:48.920 that hell is more than just a state of consciousness 00:28:48.920 --> 00:28:51.940 like people think because a lot of people talk 00:28:51.940 --> 00:28:54.519 about this new age like heaven and hell are states 00:28:54.519 --> 00:28:57.220 of states of mind right and they they are but 00:28:57.220 --> 00:29:00.220 they're they have their own geographical location 00:29:00.220 --> 00:29:02.440 right and i got to watch the world end and coming 00:29:02.440 --> 00:29:04.480 back to grips with that has all been really hard 00:29:04.480 --> 00:29:06.779 because now i just keep wondering like you can't 00:29:06.779 --> 00:29:09.319 have some of it real and not all of it and i 00:29:09.319 --> 00:29:10.720 feel like now i've been talking for a really 00:29:10.720 --> 00:29:15.079 long time i'm done i feel like i haven't breathed 00:29:15.079 --> 00:29:18.880 for about five minutes so in no particular order 00:29:18.880 --> 00:29:24.190 a few questions First of all, how long did your 00:29:24.190 --> 00:29:27.529 husband say that you had been dead with the medics 00:29:27.529 --> 00:29:31.589 waiting outside? So about 50 minutes. That's 00:29:31.589 --> 00:29:33.930 just I'll just answer the question. 50 minutes. 00:29:34.250 --> 00:29:38.089 Okay. That's a long time. It felt like I was 00:29:38.089 --> 00:29:41.230 gone for years. I mean, I literally got to go 00:29:41.230 --> 00:29:45.250 more places than I mean, when I came back, I 00:29:45.250 --> 00:29:47.410 thought it was 2026. Like, there was no brain 00:29:47.410 --> 00:29:49.750 damage, but psychologically, I did not still 00:29:49.750 --> 00:29:53.490 think it was 2025. I can say that. I thought 00:29:53.490 --> 00:29:56.750 I was gone for a year. My biggest question that 00:29:56.750 --> 00:29:59.369 I want to know the most is the time that you 00:29:59.369 --> 00:30:01.329 spent with God and you talked about putting your 00:30:01.329 --> 00:30:05.250 arms around his neck. How did you feel at that 00:30:05.250 --> 00:30:07.609 time? I know you can't remember all the download, 00:30:07.930 --> 00:30:11.859 but I'll bet you can remember how you felt. it's 00:30:11.859 --> 00:30:14.240 the problem other than the details from inside 00:30:14.240 --> 00:30:18.140 of heaven which is a layer by the way it is what 00:30:18.140 --> 00:30:20.920 we think of as heaven is a layer and other than 00:30:20.920 --> 00:30:22.740 the details of his face and stuff like that no 00:30:22.740 --> 00:30:25.420 i do remember it all and that's the problem it 00:30:25.420 --> 00:30:27.680 recharges you're allowed to go hug him anytime 00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:29.839 you want and you can stay there for as long as 00:30:29.839 --> 00:30:32.359 you want because time isn't real it doesn't exist 00:30:32.359 --> 00:30:36.480 but it recharges right and you can like see it 00:30:36.480 --> 00:30:39.359 and you can feel it and i don't know why me wanting 00:30:39.359 --> 00:30:41.680 to wrap my arms around his neck was such a big 00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:44.720 deal maybe because he had a neck right like you 00:30:44.720 --> 00:30:48.740 just want to and it's recharging and it's like 00:30:48.740 --> 00:30:51.440 he is he's bigger than the cosmos right so like 00:30:51.440 --> 00:30:54.059 a million people could fit in his lap at once 00:30:54.059 --> 00:30:58.579 except when you're sitting in it it's so cozy 00:30:59.160 --> 00:31:01.700 And when you're sitting in his lap, you get to 00:31:01.700 --> 00:31:04.640 see from his point of view. And that's crazy. 00:31:04.759 --> 00:31:08.099 I mean, it's recharging. It really is recharging. 00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:10.720 Because I think people really only think about 00:31:10.720 --> 00:31:13.380 there being heaven and hell rather than layers 00:31:13.380 --> 00:31:16.240 of heaven, layers of cosmos, layers of hell, 00:31:16.319 --> 00:31:21.279 where he sits, how he runs it. It looks like 00:31:21.279 --> 00:31:31.269 a Merkaba shaped dodecahedron. of the sand inside 00:31:31.269 --> 00:31:34.089 of like a capsule flowing and folding into the 00:31:34.089 --> 00:31:38.269 universe because he has got Jesus on his right 00:31:38.269 --> 00:31:40.789 and then he's got the archangels, Michael and 00:31:40.789 --> 00:31:43.930 Gabriel, which I gotta tell you, I knew nothing, 00:31:44.289 --> 00:31:46.890 nothing of religious education at all before 00:31:46.890 --> 00:31:49.109 I died. So to come back to life and be telling 00:31:49.109 --> 00:31:51.930 my husband, like I met somebody named Gabriel 00:31:51.930 --> 00:31:54.950 and Michael and my husband who was raised with 00:31:54.950 --> 00:31:57.470 religious backing is looking at me like, How 00:31:57.470 --> 00:32:00.049 do you seriously not know who they are, right? 00:32:00.309 --> 00:32:02.589 But there's God and there's Jesus and then the 00:32:02.589 --> 00:32:05.650 angels and there's the way that people sit behind 00:32:05.650 --> 00:32:08.349 and to the sides and the way it flows. And so 00:32:08.349 --> 00:32:13.549 you're sitting there recharging, healing, feeling 00:32:13.549 --> 00:32:16.250 like why do people choose to recharge in heaven 00:32:16.250 --> 00:32:20.430 when you could recharge in God's lap? And to 00:32:20.430 --> 00:32:25.119 watch it all, it's It's recharging that's really 00:32:25.119 --> 00:32:27.900 like I know I keep saying that but one thing 00:32:27.900 --> 00:32:30.440 I learned is that time is the only Calculable 00:32:30.440 --> 00:32:34.359 currency and so the time that we spend doing 00:32:34.359 --> 00:32:38.640 anything is based on what? We need and what we've 00:32:38.640 --> 00:32:42.079 earned up there Because you can when you go through 00:32:42.079 --> 00:32:44.799 all the levels you can see all the different 00:32:44.799 --> 00:32:47.299 people working their jobs all the angels all 00:32:47.299 --> 00:32:51.009 the chosen all the All the spirits and energies 00:32:51.009 --> 00:32:52.609 and whatever you want to call them. But when 00:32:52.609 --> 00:32:56.529 you're in his lap, he's like holding you and 00:32:56.529 --> 00:33:02.509 you get to just see it all indescribable. You 00:33:02.509 --> 00:33:06.150 mentioned something about you got to go around 00:33:06.150 --> 00:33:09.109 with him. It almost sounded like take a daughter 00:33:09.109 --> 00:33:12.769 to work day. Oh, my gosh. It really did. It really 00:33:12.769 --> 00:33:16.930 did because he let me he he I got to watch him 00:33:16.930 --> 00:33:20.940 expand the universe. What did that look like? 00:33:21.720 --> 00:33:25.880 The Bible says he speaks and it happens But with 00:33:25.880 --> 00:33:28.480 there being no sound up there he really just 00:33:28.480 --> 00:33:31.380 like thinks and it happens But when you're like 00:33:31.380 --> 00:33:34.140 with him he like shares the thought so you get 00:33:34.140 --> 00:33:39.819 to like observe it firsthand sort of and it's 00:33:39.819 --> 00:33:45.440 Indescribable it's like an ex it's the opposite 00:33:45.759 --> 00:33:48.140 See, I want to say it's the opposite of an explosion, 00:33:48.180 --> 00:33:50.059 but that's an implosion and that's still not 00:33:50.059 --> 00:33:53.400 right. It's a burst. It's a burst and expansion 00:33:53.400 --> 00:33:56.359 and the way he throws it all together and to 00:33:56.359 --> 00:33:59.599 build atmospheres of each planet and how each 00:33:59.599 --> 00:34:03.519 one plays its role in the universe. I think the 00:34:03.519 --> 00:34:05.900 word explosion, you were saying it didn't fit 00:34:05.900 --> 00:34:09.699 because we think of explosion as something that 00:34:09.699 --> 00:34:13.920 it ruins things and it blows things up and you're 00:34:13.920 --> 00:34:18.369 talking about creation. Yeah, I am. Correct me 00:34:18.369 --> 00:34:20.269 if I'm wrong, but I think you're talking about 00:34:20.269 --> 00:34:23.250 expansion without destroying anything, right? 00:34:23.730 --> 00:34:25.949 Yes, but it does, you know, and it's funny because 00:34:25.949 --> 00:34:29.849 we say energy can't be destroyed, but it does 00:34:29.849 --> 00:34:33.090 get turned into something else. Yeah, energy 00:34:33.090 --> 00:34:37.150 can be changed. Yes, transferred, yes. Yeah, 00:34:37.150 --> 00:34:40.750 and that's part of what creation is. It doesn't 00:34:40.750 --> 00:34:43.690 necessarily mean making something out of nothing. 00:34:44.159 --> 00:34:47.099 It can mean changing something from one form 00:34:47.099 --> 00:34:50.760 to another, right? Right. Like when you create 00:34:50.760 --> 00:34:55.059 a painting, you're not creating it out of nothing. 00:34:56.099 --> 00:34:59.820 You're taking paint and an easel and a brush 00:34:59.820 --> 00:35:02.619 and you're taking these things and then creating 00:35:02.619 --> 00:35:05.619 something amazing. That's how I've always pictured 00:35:05.619 --> 00:35:09.010 how he creates. Yes. Yes, that's really good 00:35:09.010 --> 00:35:10.949 too. I always use the comparison or I use the 00:35:10.949 --> 00:35:13.070 comparison now. It's like baking a cake. You 00:35:13.070 --> 00:35:14.630 know, you pray for something and then he gives 00:35:14.630 --> 00:35:17.449 you the eggs and the flour and the milk and the 00:35:17.449 --> 00:35:20.730 and you're like, why don't I have a cake? All 00:35:20.730 --> 00:35:22.550 right. Let's talk about something that you alluded 00:35:22.550 --> 00:35:26.030 to a couple of times. Heaven and hell. What did 00:35:26.030 --> 00:35:29.030 you learn about those two? And I'm going to call 00:35:29.030 --> 00:35:31.610 them places because you said that's sort of how 00:35:31.610 --> 00:35:35.510 you used it. Yeah. Yes. So there are slivers 00:35:35.510 --> 00:35:38.250 of both on earth. There is a slice of heaven 00:35:38.250 --> 00:35:40.570 on earth and there is a slice of hell and hell 00:35:40.570 --> 00:35:43.090 on earth and both can be found within your consciousness 00:35:43.090 --> 00:35:47.550 Everybody has got beams of light a glow Something 00:35:47.550 --> 00:35:50.670 inside and essentially the very next dimension 00:35:50.670 --> 00:35:53.630 because there's so many That's how they view 00:35:53.630 --> 00:35:56.090 us is through our beams of light, right? And 00:35:56.090 --> 00:35:58.949 some are dimming and they can stay dim for a 00:35:58.949 --> 00:36:02.800 very long time, but until until they go out And 00:36:02.800 --> 00:36:05.059 when they've gone out is when they start to experience 00:36:05.059 --> 00:36:09.460 hell on earth. People often might manifest this 00:36:09.460 --> 00:36:14.239 with the throws of addiction or a terrible sickness, 00:36:14.440 --> 00:36:18.139 right? Or, you know, being truly, truly lost. 00:36:18.340 --> 00:36:20.380 These are like states of mind that are heaven 00:36:20.380 --> 00:36:24.719 and hell on earth. But when I was exploring around, 00:36:25.179 --> 00:36:29.480 I very much learned That they are so much more 00:36:29.480 --> 00:36:31.760 than that because you have to put a slice of 00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:34.500 heaven and hell on earth It's hard to explain 00:36:34.500 --> 00:36:37.199 but when he was showing me this next earth how 00:36:37.199 --> 00:36:38.980 he builds it and all the things that are there 00:36:38.980 --> 00:36:40.840 and all the different kinds of life that go into 00:36:40.840 --> 00:36:43.980 it and what creates the atmosphere and so he's 00:36:43.980 --> 00:36:47.500 saying you know that hell is there for our safety 00:36:47.500 --> 00:36:52.719 and That it wasn't for me to go visit only to 00:36:52.719 --> 00:36:56.760 understand through observation So first I flew 00:36:56.760 --> 00:36:59.539 around the Garden of Eden and I got to see truly 00:36:59.539 --> 00:37:04.119 how it blossoms through our love here. It was 00:37:04.119 --> 00:37:08.500 so real. It was so overflowing. Like a rainforest 00:37:08.500 --> 00:37:12.280 of flowers, really. And I got to see several 00:37:12.280 --> 00:37:14.900 different layers of heaven and how all the workers 00:37:14.900 --> 00:37:18.380 kind of go together because I learned that my 00:37:18.380 --> 00:37:20.619 parents are not. While my parents both went to 00:37:20.619 --> 00:37:24.039 heaven, they live on different levels or layers 00:37:24.039 --> 00:37:27.730 of heaven. And with hell, I had to understand 00:37:27.730 --> 00:37:30.530 that it was for our safety first, because while 00:37:30.530 --> 00:37:35.110 humans can go to hell, it's not just humans that 00:37:35.110 --> 00:37:39.809 are out there. It's not just us in a galaxy that's 00:37:39.809 --> 00:37:42.409 infinite. There is other life out there, and 00:37:42.409 --> 00:37:44.909 whether we want to call them aliens or create 00:37:44.909 --> 00:37:47.869 some other name for them, there is a plethora 00:37:47.869 --> 00:37:50.869 of light and dark and good and evil, because 00:37:50.869 --> 00:37:52.949 light and dark don't equate to good and evil, 00:37:53.429 --> 00:37:59.110 but that There does need to be That's a it's 00:37:59.110 --> 00:38:01.789 a it's a really hard one to explain what I saw 00:38:01.789 --> 00:38:05.070 of how Was truly what I believe was just that 00:38:05.070 --> 00:38:08.389 first Like a level layer and the best way I can 00:38:08.389 --> 00:38:11.150 describe it is it being void of color? Now that 00:38:11.150 --> 00:38:14.650 may not seem like that big of a deal, but when 00:38:14.650 --> 00:38:19.150 you die you get to see Colors that don't exist 00:38:19.150 --> 00:38:21.590 to the naked eye I mean there's a million trillion 00:38:21.590 --> 00:38:25.250 more than we get to see in our rainbow and The 00:38:25.250 --> 00:38:27.510 saturation of them and the vibrancy of them and 00:38:27.510 --> 00:38:29.949 the and the mixing of them. There's so many so 00:38:29.949 --> 00:38:34.440 to not have like any I think is very telling 00:38:34.440 --> 00:38:37.780 on its own. When you're on the other side, whether 00:38:37.780 --> 00:38:40.219 you're with God or in the cosmos or in heaven, 00:38:40.500 --> 00:38:43.000 telepathy is real, right? And I wish we came 00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:44.579 up with a different word for that because I sound 00:38:44.579 --> 00:38:46.340 like a woo -woo person every time I see that, 00:38:46.340 --> 00:38:48.920 but you know, we don't use our basic five human 00:38:48.920 --> 00:38:51.519 senses over there, right? Your consciousness 00:38:51.519 --> 00:38:55.639 speaks, and in hell they can't communicate. They 00:38:55.639 --> 00:38:58.800 can't communicate, there's no color, there is 00:38:58.800 --> 00:39:01.659 still no time, but they're aware of there being 00:39:01.659 --> 00:39:04.860 no time. Whereas in heaven, there's no time, 00:39:04.860 --> 00:39:07.900 but you don't you're not even aware of it. You 00:39:07.900 --> 00:39:11.440 don't care There's just no right and so in hell 00:39:11.440 --> 00:39:13.900 it is you're cognizant of how never -ending it 00:39:13.900 --> 00:39:17.860 is and they looked they looked kind of like zombies 00:39:17.860 --> 00:39:22.980 in the sense that they were Blistered and boiled 00:39:22.980 --> 00:39:26.300 they were broken. They were torn. They were half 00:39:26.300 --> 00:39:29.780 dead You know, they wandered around and you could 00:39:29.780 --> 00:39:32.900 tell that they In a weird way, you could tell 00:39:32.900 --> 00:39:35.119 that they were all screaming, even though it 00:39:35.119 --> 00:39:39.460 was completely void of sound. But I quickly got 00:39:39.460 --> 00:39:42.840 pulled from that because it went from that to 00:39:42.840 --> 00:39:46.139 showing me the future. I watched the end of the 00:39:46.139 --> 00:39:48.840 world. I watched what it looks like for the heavens 00:39:48.840 --> 00:39:51.860 to be ripped open and for Jesus to make his way 00:39:51.860 --> 00:39:54.980 back down to Africa. Okay, tell me a whole bunch 00:39:54.980 --> 00:39:57.559 more about that. Fill in some blanks on that. 00:39:58.239 --> 00:40:02.769 Well, It was definitely the future You know that 00:40:02.769 --> 00:40:05.710 I was looking at because a lot of other things 00:40:05.710 --> 00:40:10.769 There had been so much evolution You could see 00:40:10.769 --> 00:40:13.730 all the angels right all of the energy is and 00:40:13.730 --> 00:40:17.730 everything kind of working together Because it 00:40:17.730 --> 00:40:21.289 was it's time God I I feel like I'm gonna sound 00:40:21.289 --> 00:40:24.010 crazy if I explain this and that's I think that 00:40:24.010 --> 00:40:27.130 my biggest fear about doing this all because 00:40:29.329 --> 00:40:31.530 I don't even know how to say this without sounding 00:40:31.530 --> 00:40:34.050 crazy. I think that there are good aliens and 00:40:34.050 --> 00:40:36.110 I think that there are bad aliens. And I think 00:40:36.110 --> 00:40:38.989 that oftentimes we might be calling these bad 00:40:38.989 --> 00:40:41.150 aliens demons, right? Because I do think that 00:40:41.150 --> 00:40:43.690 there are also some demonic forces that now walk 00:40:43.690 --> 00:40:46.849 around. It's crazy to hear myself say out loud 00:40:46.849 --> 00:40:50.329 compared to my whole life. We're always moving 00:40:50.329 --> 00:40:54.230 in the cosmos. And part of the reason that he 00:40:54.230 --> 00:40:56.710 has to expand and make a new Earth is because 00:40:56.710 --> 00:40:59.550 our Earth's heartbeat is dying. and the humans 00:40:59.550 --> 00:41:03.070 have been fighting the humans stuck in this big 00:41:03.070 --> 00:41:07.389 battle when it really soon is gonna need to be 00:41:07.389 --> 00:41:11.929 more about mankind about what's coming our way 00:41:11.929 --> 00:41:15.429 because while there is a lot out there what is 00:41:15.429 --> 00:41:19.630 the closest to us is not playing for our team 00:41:19.630 --> 00:41:28.630 so people need to wake up and choose God and 00:41:28.630 --> 00:41:30.989 choose love and light so we can all start working 00:41:30.989 --> 00:41:34.010 together because our energy does help thrust 00:41:34.010 --> 00:41:39.250 us. God always wins, Jesus always prevails. Watching 00:41:39.250 --> 00:41:42.750 it was like there's this big red carpet that 00:41:42.750 --> 00:41:45.570 gets laid out and it's like it gets spread out 00:41:45.570 --> 00:41:50.090 through... I mean, I don't, you know, where God 00:41:50.090 --> 00:41:52.550 sits in relation to the planets is such a hard 00:41:52.550 --> 00:41:56.300 thing to explain, so... and you're watching all 00:41:56.300 --> 00:42:00.159 the angels come down and they open up the skies 00:42:00.159 --> 00:42:06.059 and they form into this chariot if you will and 00:42:06.059 --> 00:42:10.860 he rides down to Africa and it's it I didn't 00:42:10.860 --> 00:42:13.420 know until I came back to life because I had 00:42:13.420 --> 00:42:16.639 never read the Bible that what I had seen was 00:42:16.639 --> 00:42:20.380 revelations Which is also really interesting 00:42:20.380 --> 00:42:22.940 though because God did make it very very very 00:42:22.940 --> 00:42:25.300 very clear to me that all religions have about 00:42:25.300 --> 00:42:27.900 10 % right and they need to slam together in 00:42:27.900 --> 00:42:30.579 order to get the complete truth. So I'm still 00:42:30.579 --> 00:42:34.460 kind of working my way through a lot of this. 00:42:34.679 --> 00:42:36.780 I haven't really talked about like the end of 00:42:36.780 --> 00:42:39.599 the world or really any of this publicly like 00:42:39.599 --> 00:42:43.659 this before because I'm still trying to make 00:42:43.659 --> 00:42:47.000 sense of it on my own I suppose. Seven months 00:42:47.000 --> 00:42:49.679 is not a long time. It's gonna take you a while 00:42:49.679 --> 00:42:52.900 to work through all this I've never gone so long 00:42:52.900 --> 00:42:58.159 without working like it's it's I I've been focusing 00:42:58.159 --> 00:43:01.260 on being close to God and eating right and keeping 00:43:01.260 --> 00:43:03.179 my child like a wonderment, but I got to tell 00:43:03.179 --> 00:43:09.480 you it So weird it's so weird being Being back 00:43:09.480 --> 00:43:11.980 because our love here doesn't compare our joy 00:43:11.980 --> 00:43:15.599 here doesn't compare our color here doesn't compare 00:43:15.599 --> 00:43:21.559 and time moves so Strangely Alright couple more 00:43:21.559 --> 00:43:24.940 things before we finish up here I alluded to 00:43:24.940 --> 00:43:26.699 the fact earlier because you and I talked about 00:43:26.699 --> 00:43:31.599 it last week about your name change or new name 00:43:31.599 --> 00:43:35.719 or Tell me about your name So, you know, I grew 00:43:35.719 --> 00:43:37.780 up in the same house my whole life and I grew 00:43:37.780 --> 00:43:40.679 up with Seven other people who had the same first 00:43:40.679 --> 00:43:42.699 and middle name and we were all so different. 00:43:42.699 --> 00:43:45.659 So I think from the time I was a kid being born 00:43:45.659 --> 00:43:49.820 Rebecca Ann, it just never fit. And I never found 00:43:49.820 --> 00:43:51.579 it fair that we get to choose everything about 00:43:51.579 --> 00:43:53.579 ourselves and not the name that represents us. 00:43:53.659 --> 00:43:56.280 So I changed my name to Riley before my parents 00:43:56.280 --> 00:43:59.460 died. And that is truly how I know myself. But 00:43:59.460 --> 00:44:01.880 I think just through a series of existential 00:44:01.880 --> 00:44:06.280 crises, I was hoping that if God renamed me, 00:44:06.360 --> 00:44:08.980 it would just like put an end to all of that 00:44:08.980 --> 00:44:12.070 and squash it. And it would be. You know, so 00:44:12.070 --> 00:44:14.309 I asked God, you know, if you're giving me new 00:44:14.309 --> 00:44:17.510 life, do you give me a new name? And at that 00:44:17.510 --> 00:44:20.389 point, I didn't get the overwhelming of him speaking 00:44:20.389 --> 00:44:23.309 to me the way that, you know, I did before. Instead, 00:44:23.329 --> 00:44:25.010 it was more like I was just getting imagery. 00:44:25.110 --> 00:44:28.210 And he showed me a bundle of white lilies. And 00:44:28.210 --> 00:44:31.949 I took that as, okay, I'm Lily now. And it's 00:44:31.949 --> 00:44:34.409 hard. It's hard. You know, I thought that was 00:44:34.409 --> 00:44:37.010 gonna break me fist. It really should, right? 00:44:37.090 --> 00:44:39.829 But old habits die hard because I still find 00:44:39.829 --> 00:44:42.489 myself constantly introducing myself as Riley 00:44:42.489 --> 00:44:46.789 or responding to Riley. But I, yeah, you know, 00:44:46.789 --> 00:44:50.590 I asked for it. I ask and you shall receive. 00:44:51.769 --> 00:44:57.429 Yeah, okay. This show is all about hope, okay? 00:44:58.429 --> 00:45:00.550 Because we live in kind of a tough place at a 00:45:00.550 --> 00:45:03.780 tough time right now. And for a lot of people 00:45:03.780 --> 00:45:06.059 they're struggling to have some kind of hope 00:45:06.059 --> 00:45:09.699 because they feel loss, they feel tragedy, they 00:45:09.699 --> 00:45:12.980 feel the weight of the world on their shoulders. 00:45:13.420 --> 00:45:17.599 You get that. I want you to try to describe in 00:45:17.599 --> 00:45:20.639 any more detail if you can what it was like to 00:45:20.639 --> 00:45:24.139 sit on God's lap and why that should give hope 00:45:24.139 --> 00:45:29.579 to others. So I think the thing about I keep 00:45:29.579 --> 00:45:32.059 making it a point to say you get every question 00:45:32.059 --> 00:45:34.360 ever answered like that you've ever wondered 00:45:34.360 --> 00:45:37.300 answered and I don't think our recall on what 00:45:37.300 --> 00:45:40.019 those answers are is are as important as the 00:45:40.019 --> 00:45:43.960 fact that there is an answer for every single 00:45:43.960 --> 00:45:48.699 thing every Hardship every weight every cancer 00:45:48.699 --> 00:45:52.699 every sickness every injustice that we see we 00:45:52.699 --> 00:45:58.079 think that that it can't be glorious, but He 00:45:58.079 --> 00:46:02.960 is truly glorious. I've seen it. Because I used 00:46:02.960 --> 00:46:05.679 to feel that same way and the truth is that he 00:46:05.679 --> 00:46:10.219 does not do anything without not only reason 00:46:10.219 --> 00:46:13.719 and balance, but also gifts that come with it. 00:46:13.980 --> 00:46:17.000 We may not see them and understand them. But 00:46:17.000 --> 00:46:20.099 that's the same way that, like, you're mixing 00:46:20.099 --> 00:46:22.699 oatmeal for a kid that's right there and it's 00:46:22.699 --> 00:46:24.539 like the kid's just like, I'm hungry, I'm hungry, 00:46:24.599 --> 00:46:27.360 I'm hungry, why aren't you feeding me? Not seeing 00:46:27.360 --> 00:46:30.079 that, like, parents just hasn't given it to them 00:46:30.079 --> 00:46:32.980 yet, right? I think what weighs us down are the 00:46:32.980 --> 00:46:37.099 questions without answers. But there should be 00:46:37.099 --> 00:46:41.659 hope that there are answers to absolutely everything, 00:46:41.920 --> 00:46:46.119 that everything is balanced. that God, you just 00:46:46.119 --> 00:46:53.280 have to seek him and that he truly is the most 00:46:53.280 --> 00:46:58.159 omnipotent that there could ever be. I think 00:46:58.159 --> 00:47:01.780 we need to relinquish a lot of control, which 00:47:01.780 --> 00:47:05.460 is hard, but I was an atheist and I got to see 00:47:05.460 --> 00:47:08.400 God, so I also don't want people to be scared 00:47:08.400 --> 00:47:11.769 of this like biblical telling or this baptist 00:47:11.769 --> 00:47:14.650 telling of you know fear god because god doesn't 00:47:14.650 --> 00:47:16.630 want to be feared he wants to be loved right 00:47:16.630 --> 00:47:19.769 but this whole idea that you can't be in god's 00:47:19.769 --> 00:47:22.969 presence if you haven't done x y or z it's it's 00:47:22.969 --> 00:47:25.449 so much more complex than that because his love 00:47:25.449 --> 00:47:30.889 is so unconditional and it's so overwhelming 00:47:30.889 --> 00:47:36.389 and this is just a waiting period because The 00:47:36.389 --> 00:47:39.269 answers, when you get them, they all make sense 00:47:39.269 --> 00:47:42.269 and you realize that nothing could shift or be 00:47:42.269 --> 00:47:46.210 any different and it still work out the way it 00:47:46.210 --> 00:47:52.110 needs to. God is love. Riley, thank you so much 00:47:52.110 --> 00:47:54.369 for being with me today. It's been awesome. I 00:47:54.369 --> 00:47:58.150 appreciate it. I'm sorry that I talk a lot, but 00:47:58.150 --> 00:48:01.269 thank you so much. This has been wonderful for 00:48:01.269 --> 00:48:06.269 me to work through. Have your support, all of 00:48:06.269 --> 00:48:10.110 it. Thank you, I'm honored. Thanks again for 00:48:10.110 --> 00:48:12.710 listening and sharing this podcast. Don't forget 00:48:12.710 --> 00:48:15.489 to hit the follow or subscribe button and sign 00:48:15.489 --> 00:48:17.789 up for our newsletter at roundtripdeath .com. 00:48:18.349 --> 00:48:20.670 If you want to share your near -death experience 00:48:20.670 --> 00:48:22.929 or if you have questions or comments about the 00:48:22.929 --> 00:48:25.809 show, send an email to eric at roundtripdeath 00:48:25.809 --> 00:48:28.989 .com. Until then, I wish you everything good 00:48:28.989 --> 00:48:31.289 that you're looking for in this life and the 00:48:31.289 --> 00:48:31.690 next.