1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,400 From the time that they pronounced me dead was a good 45 minutes. 2 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:13,440 They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped. 3 00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:18,120 And I could see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realize that was actually my 4 00:00:18,120 --> 00:00:21,320 physical body because I was somewhere else. 5 00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:27,400 The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't 6 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:29,400 anything else to be felt. 7 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:32,520 I was greeted by people I'd known in the past. 8 00:00:32,520 --> 00:00:34,160 I'm back home again. 9 00:00:34,160 --> 00:00:39,160 Incredibly safe and felt at home. 10 00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:41,720 Welcome, welcome to Round Trip Death. 11 00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:44,880 And we're excited to have our guest on today, Rebecca. 12 00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:45,880 How are you Rebecca? 13 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:47,480 Well, I'm doing good. 14 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:49,000 Thank you. 15 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:52,080 Coming from Wisconsin, what's it like there right now? 16 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,160 Ooh, today is beautiful. 17 00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:55,800 Just sunny, the breeze is blowing. 18 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:59,720 And I sent the Kittos to the park because the slides aren't too hot. 19 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,760 So it's one of those perfect spring days, summer days. 20 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:08,360 Yeah, it's by the way, early summer when we're recording this for those that are wondering. 21 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:11,800 I know it does get cold there in the winter, but we don't need to get into that. 22 00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,720 I'm going to just let everybody know this is going to be fun today. 23 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:20,760 We're going to talk about an experience that Rebecca had when she was five years old and 24 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:24,760 then another one quite a few years later, later in life. 25 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:28,800 Maybe we can figure out how to tie those things together just a little bit. 26 00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:32,800 But in the meantime, we want to get to know you for a second. 27 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:35,000 Tell us a little bit about Rebecca. 28 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,000 Sure. 29 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,960 I'm a go by mom. 30 00:01:37,960 --> 00:01:43,320 So I have a tribe of Kittos that are a lot of them are home schooled. 31 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,520 Some do go to public school. 32 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:46,960 So that's the first job. 33 00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:52,800 I've made a career out of photography and building a life around kids and family. 34 00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:55,880 And I have found solitude in music. 35 00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:58,880 So I kind of live an artisan's life. 36 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:01,000 What kind of music do you play? 37 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,000 All the above. 38 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,560 No, it's rock and roll. 39 00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:08,160 I played shadow specifically. 40 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:16,600 So we like to say we play music from across the genre from Bob Dylan to Pink Floyd to some 41 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:20,840 personal ones that we've created just about anything. 42 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:25,520 I'm trying to picture cello in Pink Floyd music. 43 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:27,560 I'm going to have to hear some sometime. 44 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:30,080 I will be sure to send you a link. 45 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:31,080 Okay. 46 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:32,680 I'm looking forward to it. 47 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:35,120 Well, let's go way back in time. 48 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:37,840 Tell us what was going on when you were five years old. 49 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:43,560 I know it was a ski day, but give us a paint a picture of what's going on this day. 50 00:02:43,560 --> 00:02:44,560 Yes. 51 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:50,640 Well, it was 1986 was the year and I was five years old. 52 00:02:50,640 --> 00:02:54,880 It was a family hobby of ours that we hit the ski hill on the weekends. 53 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:57,880 So I was raised on skis. 54 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:03,640 So by five, I was on my own and I navigate just about any run on that at our local resort 55 00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,960 where we skied. 56 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:10,520 My dad was an instructor, so he would send me along to go ski with my friends and I'd 57 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:14,440 go and he'd teach and we'd meet up at the end of his shift. 58 00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:15,800 So he was just finishing up. 59 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:18,600 He said, take one more run. 60 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:24,480 And I was with a girlfriend of mine and we had created our own ski hill. 61 00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:28,760 And when I say our own ski hill, it was through the woods and it was a little cat track that 62 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:32,320 we had to go through the powder to just make our own trail. 63 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:34,440 It was very exciting. 64 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:40,360 And so much so that we even took skittles, the little candies, and we put them down the 65 00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:45,440 trail so that we could remember our tracks because it was such a fun little through the 66 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:46,440 woods. 67 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:53,040 So when we got the last call, I was really excited to go do that last hill again. 68 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:58,560 Little did we know that the last hill would be the last run for a very long time. 69 00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:03,880 We had gotten started and I was following the rainbow trail down the hill and I lost control 70 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:10,680 on my skis and hugged a tree, smack dab in the center. 71 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:11,760 I hit the ground. 72 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:16,160 I was not lifeless, but I had knocked myself out pretty hard. 73 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:17,560 There was a lot of blood. 74 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:21,840 Thankfully, my friend that I was skiing with was able to get help. 75 00:04:21,840 --> 00:04:23,920 By the way, let me just interject. 76 00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:28,520 Back then we didn't wear helmets skiing like everybody does now. 77 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:30,240 Yes, there was no helmets. 78 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:32,240 In fact, I had a little bunny hat. 79 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:34,840 It was a white hat with these little rabbit ears. 80 00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:40,960 That was my hat that I was wearing while skiing through my bunny trail, following the rainbow. 81 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:45,880 So you wrapped yourself around a tree, smacked your head. 82 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:47,520 Time goes for help. 83 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,520 Are you conscious? 84 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:54,640 Well, at that point, I think I was started the in and out of consciousness. 85 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:56,720 I know my head hurt really, really bad. 86 00:04:56,720 --> 00:04:59,120 I could hear the screams for help. 87 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:06,080 I was somewhat coherent when the rescue team arrived to put me on the board or on the backboard 88 00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:08,280 to take me down the hill. 89 00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:13,480 Once I got loaded and they were bringing me down the hill, it was such a rocky ride on 90 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:20,120 my head that I astro projected out of my body at that point. 91 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:26,840 I went up to the treetops and sat and watched the rescue team take my body in a toboggan 92 00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:29,240 down the hill. 93 00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:34,960 While I was in the trees, I can say there was an angelic being or somebody near me. 94 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,840 So I was never really alone sitting in the trees. 95 00:05:37,840 --> 00:05:39,880 I was not afraid by any means. 96 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:44,960 It was just more of watching the scenes unfold in front of you. 97 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:46,120 I think that's interesting. 98 00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:52,840 I hear that a lot that when people have had some kind of accident, they're out of their 99 00:05:52,840 --> 00:05:55,640 body looking down with very little emotion. 100 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:57,480 Not like, oh, panic. 101 00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:01,800 I need to get back in my body or even the opposite. 102 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:05,120 Not feeling like, yay, I'm out of pain. 103 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:07,560 It just kind of, matter of fact. 104 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:09,800 And it sounds like that's how you were. 105 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,800 Well, yes. 106 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:16,000 And so much so that I do remember trying to go back down into my body. 107 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:21,280 And I remember feeling every bump of that hill and just my head hurt so bad that I popped 108 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:22,280 right back out. 109 00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:23,600 I didn't want to be there. 110 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,360 It hurts. 111 00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:28,840 And so I was pain free when I was watching. 112 00:06:28,840 --> 00:06:30,600 They did get me down to the bottom. 113 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:35,840 They did a further analysis and said, hey, you need more, need to be checked out by, 114 00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:38,080 you know, better doctors. 115 00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:42,480 So my dad was able to drive me to the emergency room. 116 00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:47,600 And it was upon my arrival that they got me hooked up to CAT scans and all that, I must 117 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:51,680 say the New Age technology back in 1986. 118 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:58,120 But one of the prereqs that they had to do to see my head was to get me a CAT scan. 119 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:05,760 And so when they gave me the IVP die, the contrast, that sent me into an anaphylactic 120 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,800 shock and it killed me there on the spot. 121 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,800 So you were allergic to the die? 122 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:14,600 I was allergic to the die and nobody really knew. 123 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:15,600 Nobody knew. 124 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:16,600 We didn't know. 125 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:17,600 Well, sure. 126 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,800 Yeah, it's your first time for it. 127 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:26,040 So at that point in the hospital, I remember I completely disappeared. 128 00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:30,240 I was sent up and I'm going to say up because there was nothing scary. 129 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:34,120 It was all positive and light and very, very happy. 130 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:40,800 But I had been ejected up and sat under a really big tree. 131 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:45,840 And when I said big tree, I envisioned this big willow tree and it was very ethereal and 132 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:50,120 just big and the trunk was bigger than what I could get my arms around. 133 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:53,600 So it's just a neat spot to sit. 134 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,920 And I was not alone. 135 00:07:55,920 --> 00:08:00,640 My five year old mind tells me that it was Jesus that sat next to me. 136 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:06,200 I'd say my adult mind now would say it's God, our God, universe, spirit or somebody of that 137 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,320 higher source. 138 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:09,440 But I was never alone. 139 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:12,160 There was no talking under the tree. 140 00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:15,800 Although there was talking, it was done via telepathy. 141 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:23,360 So there was a lot exchanged in that regards, but nothing that was done verbally. 142 00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:25,920 I don't remember speaking at all. 143 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:29,240 So I sat with what I'm going to say, Jesus, to keep it simple. 144 00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:35,520 I sat with him and surrounding us, there was probably a dozen or so other angels around 145 00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:37,320 us in a circle. 146 00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:40,360 I couldn't really see faces or anything other than that. 147 00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:42,040 They were just white angelic. 148 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:45,040 I could see wings and they were very glowy. 149 00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:50,560 I didn't see anything outside of a tree and the beans and it was just like mountainous 150 00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:52,400 field, beautiful. 151 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:58,000 It was almost as if we were inside a bubble looking out so that holographic, you know, 152 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,840 or kaleidoscope style iridescent. 153 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,840 It was beautiful. 154 00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:05,760 You remember any more details? 155 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:09,560 You said it was really beautiful and stuff, but I can say beautiful. 156 00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:12,760 I'm going to say earthly. 157 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:16,040 To me, the thing that stuck out or sticks out is the big tree. 158 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:20,520 I have an obsession with trees now. 159 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:28,400 And very much the tree was just a willow light, very flowy as far as feeling. 160 00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:35,720 I can say it was ecstasy and I can speak freely because I have used ecstasy to try to reach 161 00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:37,720 the state. 162 00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:45,000 That's a later download, but it is that all-encompassing, warm, fuzzy hug. 163 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:48,120 There was nothing scary about it. 164 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,520 You mentioned communication with Jesus. 165 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:53,600 Do you remember anything that was communicated back and forth? 166 00:09:53,600 --> 00:10:00,440 Well, this one's harder to explain in that the communication was I saw the beginning 167 00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:04,400 of time and I saw an end of time. 168 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:09,840 And end of time meaning like a big bang and it all imploded in on itself. 169 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,880 And then I was sent back here to Earth. 170 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:15,200 So that's kind of how I was sent back. 171 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:18,880 The beginning of the time started with a big bright bang, right? 172 00:10:18,880 --> 00:10:24,840 And then I got to see an omnipresence, if that makes sense. 173 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:28,600 I saw everything and anything all at once. 174 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:30,200 That's really hard to describe. 175 00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:35,240 And coming from a five-year-old mind, it's taken me 37 years to try to come to this 176 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:39,960 conclusion going, whoa, something did happen there. 177 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,320 You come back with an understanding. 178 00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:45,160 So tell me what happened to you physically after that. 179 00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:47,040 Did you come back into your body? 180 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,760 Were they reviving you? 181 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:53,160 Tell me a little bit about what you know about that. 182 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:54,160 Yeah. 183 00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:58,960 So coming back, like I said, that beginning of time, end of time, and then getting sent 184 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:03,880 back into body was like coming backwards through that tunnel. 185 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:08,480 So instead of going to the light in a tunnel, I was sent backwards to a tunnel. 186 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:14,000 I woke up to the hospital bright light and a bunch of heads over me saying, she's here. 187 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:21,480 At that point, I grabbed my ears and I screamed my earrings because they had taken them out 188 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,360 to do the CAT scans and I had recently gotten a pierce. 189 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:25,840 That was a big deal. 190 00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:28,920 Yeah, to a five-year-old girl, yeah. 191 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:31,880 To a five-year-old, that was a big deal. 192 00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:35,560 And so at that point, my mom says, yep, she's back. 193 00:11:35,560 --> 00:11:38,480 Hey, just a quick interruption. 194 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:42,080 This month, we're asking for your support for the show. 195 00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:47,320 It's definitely a labor of love for Will and I, but it takes a ton of time and money 196 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:50,120 and we need donations to keep things going. 197 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:54,200 For those that donated last week, we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. 198 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,160 For everyone else, it's easy. 199 00:11:56,160 --> 00:12:01,400 Go to roundtripdeath.com, click on the little donation button in the upper right-hand corner. 200 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:05,760 You can show your support for the podcast and help us move forward. 201 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:08,360 We have had requests for video interviews. 202 00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:12,520 That's something that will be unveiling soon as well as other improvements. 203 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,080 Thank you, thank you in advance. 204 00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:17,440 Now back to the guest. 205 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:22,080 So yes, the return was that and I guess that was that. 206 00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:26,520 We were thankful that I was back and I grew up a normal life. 207 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:28,400 You know, I'm gonna say normal. 208 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:33,680 We didn't talk much about the accident or things that happened or what is the fallout 209 00:12:33,680 --> 00:12:43,200 of trauma, putting yourself back together after an experience like that is quite unreal. 210 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:48,320 Excuse me. 211 00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:50,280 Did you have a long recovery? 212 00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:55,160 You know, the recovery was not bad actually. 213 00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:59,960 I remember being in the hospital for a few weeks just to monitor and it was beautiful 214 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:00,960 there. 215 00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:04,760 I was a kid and then released after that. 216 00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:07,080 I mean, it was it. 217 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,280 We didn't talk about it. 218 00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,120 It was done. 219 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:16,320 We didn't talk about the dreams, the PTSD of the dreams that I had. 220 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:23,640 You know, there's a fallout after going through something that large and being five and trying 221 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:25,880 to understand it. 222 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:27,800 Well adults have a hard time processing. 223 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,440 I can't imagine how much harder for a five-year-old. 224 00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:31,440 Right. 225 00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:35,000 Were you able to talk to anybody about what happened to you? 226 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,880 You know, no, not really. 227 00:13:37,880 --> 00:13:41,160 I have journals and lots and lots of journals. 228 00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:45,720 So I did a lot of journaling to just get through it. 229 00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:49,320 I can say I found solace in music. 230 00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:56,720 My mom started me on music at a very young age and I am thankful for that because that 231 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,600 would probably be my saving grace. 232 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:01,400 That's beautiful. 233 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:04,160 As a five-year-old, you're now changed. 234 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,040 You're different than other five-year-olds. 235 00:14:07,040 --> 00:14:08,920 You've had an experience none of them have. 236 00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:11,560 But I'm not talking about the tree. 237 00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:22,240 I'm talking about this experience with Jesus and wherever you were and whatever was happening. 238 00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:26,160 Did you look at life differently than your friends as you were growing up? 239 00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:29,080 Oh boy, yes. 240 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:35,320 I would say now reflecting back, I grew up as a square peg trying to fit into a round 241 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:37,560 tall. 242 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:42,080 I got into a lot of trouble and not intentionally. 243 00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:47,240 It was just unintentional trouble or trouble from me all the time. 244 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:48,760 It's still done. 245 00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:53,520 But I'm able to, I feel like now it's like I embrace it because that's my lesson and 246 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:54,520 that's how we learn. 247 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:59,520 Was some of that from the PTSD that you mentioned or just because you looked at life differently 248 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:01,880 than other people? 249 00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:03,080 That's a good question. 250 00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:06,040 I don't have that answer. 251 00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:11,760 I'd like to say it's just because I see life from two different perspectives. 252 00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:19,680 I guess now as I'm coming more into a better understanding, I'm in a really good place. 253 00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:26,720 I can confidently say I grew up with what I call kaleidoscope eyes and that I can see 254 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:34,080 auras around people and I can see energy signatures around things. 255 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:38,800 So it can be quite, I'm gonna say intoxicating to go into public. 256 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:45,200 It's a lot to process when you're taking life in through two different perspectives, not 257 00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:53,080 only visually, but that sensory, our skin, I can take in perceptions through just this 258 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:55,480 outer awareness that I have. 259 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:57,960 In what ways is that difficult? 260 00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,800 It can be very draining. 261 00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:08,440 The more I'm aware of my own powers and handling my own body before I did not understand that 262 00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:09,560 aspect. 263 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:16,680 And so it was very easy to get, I'm gonna say just consumed with whatever surrounding 264 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:17,680 you're in. 265 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:23,200 So if you're in with a group of friends that aren't so good, you're probably gonna do bad 266 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:24,200 things. 267 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:32,520 Have there been times when you've needed some extra sort of, oh, some extra perception as 268 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,600 far as who do I trust? 269 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:35,680 Who do I not trust? 270 00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:39,800 Is this a good person that I can trust and be with? 271 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,960 Have you had any insights that have helped you with that? 272 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:49,560 No, because I got to a pretty bad period in my life that I shut down from everything 273 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:54,120 and everybody and just became this recluse. 274 00:16:54,120 --> 00:17:01,880 And I think it was in that timeframe that I was able to cultivate more of who I am. 275 00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:09,120 And the more I questioned that and the more I tested my, what I call my abilities, right? 276 00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:10,440 Ooh, I think I can do that. 277 00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:11,440 Oh, yes, I can. 278 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:13,960 Oh, yes, I can. 279 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:19,520 The more comfortable I became with just being able to go out, you know, more outside of 280 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:20,760 my house. 281 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:28,400 And as far as trusting people, you know, I still don't, but I feel I want to trust everybody 282 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,000 until you prove me wrong. 283 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:35,640 You know, you have to do something pretty bad to make me not like you because I like 284 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:36,640 everybody. 285 00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:37,640 Yeah. 286 00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:42,760 And then I'm guessing once that label hits, you're stuck with it. 287 00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:43,760 Right? 288 00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:49,920 Because if you trust people and then they do something to fill up that trust, yeah, it's 289 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,560 hard for them to get it back. 290 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:52,560 Oh, yes. 291 00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:53,560 Oh, yes. 292 00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:55,040 My kids are learning that one too. 293 00:17:55,040 --> 00:18:02,320 You know, mom can be pushed pretty far one way, but it can come back and go the other 294 00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:04,160 way real quickly. 295 00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:08,240 You mentioned, if you don't mind me bringing it up, you brought it up first. 296 00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:10,360 You mentioned ecstasy. 297 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:16,120 Did you, was there a time that you got into drugs trying to replicate what you felt here? 298 00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:17,160 Absolutely. 299 00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:23,000 And again, this is just going back and reflecting, trying to retrain and make sense out of my 300 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:27,200 chaotic life and what is going on and what the heck happened. 301 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:31,640 You know, I also came to this big, what happened to me? 302 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:38,760 And so it was in my, well, zero to 18, my mom would say I was under her house and her rules, 303 00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:39,760 right? 304 00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:45,680 And so that it was pretty, a pretty well oiled machine on what the expectations were from 305 00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:47,800 zero to 18. 306 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:52,600 I went to college and that's when I realized, oh, there's no rules. 307 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:55,480 Let them, nobody did tell me no. 308 00:18:55,480 --> 00:19:01,440 And so I kind of went down a few experimental rabbit holes. 309 00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:07,440 There was some drinking until I discovered the drug scene and became what we call the 310 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:10,080 a hippie chick or a raver chick. 311 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:14,720 I was with the crowd that would break into warehouses and we'd set up our DJ stuff and 312 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:23,160 we would take a few ecstasy tabs or mushrooms or LSD or anything we could get our hands 313 00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:29,840 on at that point and dance and dance and dance until the sun came up or the cop shut us down. 314 00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:30,840 Did it ever help? 315 00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,160 Did you ever get that feeling back again? 316 00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:34,160 No. 317 00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:35,160 Well, yes and no. 318 00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:41,920 And I don't want everybody running out and saying, hey, this is what we need to do to 319 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:42,920 die. 320 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,560 But we're not advocating drug use for this stuff. 321 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,600 I'm not advocating that by any means. 322 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:56,880 I can say there were a few times that I had those deja vu moments where I went, oh, this 323 00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,320 is the same as this. 324 00:19:58,320 --> 00:20:03,800 Oh, you know, this is a sense of familiarity. 325 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:05,920 I'm familiar with that. 326 00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:09,600 And so that became very comfortable for me. 327 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:14,480 I partied hard for a solid two years like that. 328 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:20,280 I'd say those would be the dark days. 329 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:23,760 And then I ended up getting pregnant with my son. 330 00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:27,800 And so it was the day I found out that I was pregnant. 331 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:33,960 My life, like a light switch I turned and I became this, you know, I'm responsible for 332 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,800 someone else now. 333 00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:41,920 And so everything quit and I cleaned myself up and, you know, it's been all about my kids 334 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:43,680 ever since. 335 00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:45,680 That's not easy to do. 336 00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:46,680 Good job. 337 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,480 All right, let's fast forward. 338 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:49,480 Okay. 339 00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,520 Let's talk about your other experience. 340 00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:53,280 When was this and what brought it up? 341 00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:54,920 And as far as well. 342 00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:55,920 Okay. 343 00:20:55,920 --> 00:21:01,880 So the other and I'm the other experience would be more post divorce. 344 00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:05,680 And I'd probably classify it more as spiritual awakening. 345 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:13,120 I just had a very profound moment in which I felt God. 346 00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:14,120 I felt God. 347 00:21:14,120 --> 00:21:21,120 I was teleported to what I would call the pyramids. 348 00:21:21,120 --> 00:21:22,120 I was in my bathroom. 349 00:21:22,120 --> 00:21:23,760 All of this happened. 350 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:25,880 I was in my bathroom. 351 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:29,680 I had a meltdown and just life was real hard. 352 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,960 I was raising four kids. 353 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:37,760 I had just finished a real nasty divorce and I was a single parent. 354 00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:38,760 That's rough. 355 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:42,920 And then when I say nasty divorce, we had restraining order and a seven year custody 356 00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:44,200 battle for the kids. 357 00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,720 So it was a very long road. 358 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:52,800 I had reached kind of the end of that road and I remember going into what I call full 359 00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:56,520 surrender and just kind of gave it up and said, that's it. 360 00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,680 I had my meltdown. 361 00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:05,200 And that's when I was, like I said, tele-transupported to, I saw the pyramids. 362 00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:08,080 My hands are up like this because I was blocking the sun. 363 00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:09,080 It was bright. 364 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:16,760 And I just felt that wash of just again, that ecstasy feeling from head to toe, the 365 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,160 toe to head to everywhere. 366 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:26,760 And then I just fell down and just prayed because it was very, very real. 367 00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:33,520 When I was in my bathroom, I think the year would have been 2016, 2017, somewhere in 368 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,040 there. 369 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:40,200 And it was after that point that I kind of, I really kicked it into high gear and started 370 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:47,720 learning energy and became a Reiki master over the period of the next year and a half, 371 00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:49,360 two years. 372 00:22:49,360 --> 00:22:53,800 And it's just kind of carrying forward now, MSA snowballing now into some really, really 373 00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:54,800 cool things. 374 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,280 That's great. 375 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:59,680 Did you test out any religions in that process? 376 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:04,640 I am a connoisseur of any and all religions. 377 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:06,920 I like to keep an open mind. 378 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:12,200 I don't necessarily practice, continue, you know what I mean, a daily practice I don't 379 00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:16,520 really have because I'm too much of a, I like variety of everything. 380 00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,920 It just depends on how I'm feeling now. 381 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:21,640 So I'm feeling now. 382 00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:28,000 But I got myself the book, the Manly P. Hall, the religions of the ages. 383 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:29,960 That textbook is like this big. 384 00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:31,760 And I just, I devoured that. 385 00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:36,520 I spent probably two, three months reading that from front end to cover end. 386 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:42,720 And then I was able to dive into what really grabbed at me from there and just explore. 387 00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:49,600 You said that during this time, you felt God explain what that feels like. 388 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:57,000 And then you, or I go back to that, that ecstasy feeling, a warm, it's like putting on a warm, 389 00:23:57,000 --> 00:24:01,560 fuzzy sweater, or it's an all-encompassing hug. 390 00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:04,800 It's an explosion of love. 391 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:08,560 If you're into, you know, the brain analogy, it's your dopamine dose. 392 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:14,880 You just got that explosion, the dopamine in your head, a profound, something profound, 393 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:16,240 hypersensory feeling. 394 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:20,280 Do you think that's the same thing that you felt when you were five years old? 395 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:21,280 No. 396 00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:24,280 They were very different experiences. 397 00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,480 What did it feel like when you were five? 398 00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:27,600 Trauma. 399 00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:28,840 It was painful. 400 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:29,840 It was painful. 401 00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:35,040 That's why I ejected out of my body from, you know, that first start off of it. 402 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:38,760 And the recovery of it was painful. 403 00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:42,440 But you also said there were these really good feelings that you wanted to replicate 404 00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:43,880 later. 405 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:46,120 So tell us about those. 406 00:24:46,120 --> 00:24:52,240 Yeah, so the chasing of, you know, feeling that ultimate high in the form of drugs, and 407 00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:55,280 no, you cannot really recreate it. 408 00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:59,840 Came close, but it is not on that seeing level. 409 00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:05,120 Yeah, I also wanted to ask about these angels that you said you saw. 410 00:25:05,120 --> 00:25:08,800 I'm going back to your five-year-old experience again now. 411 00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:14,800 Do you have any idea of who they were, what they were, or just, they were just comforting 412 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,520 beings that were there? 413 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:23,400 I think they were there to comfort me so that being alone with a man, I mean, that's a stranger 414 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:26,240 danger in my opinion. 415 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:30,080 And we were raised like in that regards. 416 00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:33,240 So I think they were just there to help comfort. 417 00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:34,240 And they didn't speak. 418 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:35,640 They didn't make any sounds. 419 00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:37,680 There was no movement. 420 00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:40,080 They were just there as a presence. 421 00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:41,960 And helped you not be afraid? 422 00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:47,760 I'd like to think that that was part of that comforting feeling, or maybe they were helping 423 00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:51,240 to bolster me up with that piece. 424 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:55,840 So what have you learned from all of this that you can share that might help somebody 425 00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:56,840 else today? 426 00:25:56,840 --> 00:26:00,840 How do you sum that up? 427 00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:01,840 That's your job. 428 00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:02,840 I get to just ask. 429 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:07,200 I have the easy part. 430 00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:08,200 It's very short. 431 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,280 You know, if you blink, you miss it. 432 00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:12,120 It goes real quick. 433 00:26:12,120 --> 00:26:15,120 I guess we all have gifts. 434 00:26:15,120 --> 00:26:19,480 Okay, every one of us have this gift that's within us. 435 00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:27,360 So it's never too late to deep dive into your heart and ask those questions. 436 00:26:27,360 --> 00:26:36,960 I can say the universe, God, universe, spirit, does, wants us to know him. 437 00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,160 And he wants to work with us. 438 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:43,520 You know, first hand, he wants to, he's always listening. 439 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:44,520 And he's always there. 440 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,320 He never turns off. 441 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:47,320 So what does that mean? 442 00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:49,840 How does that make someone's life better? 443 00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:51,880 To know you're never alone. 444 00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:59,200 I think there's comfort because sometimes you really feel isolated and alone. 445 00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:06,160 And I know that because I've intentionally gone through isolation of myself to knowing, 446 00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:10,840 you know, that there's, you're never alone. 447 00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:16,560 Most people that have a near death experience when they're an adult, they come back having 448 00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:20,200 zero fear of death in the future. 449 00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:23,640 You know, they're not out committing suicide, but they're like, Hey, when it's my time, 450 00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:26,200 I am so ready to go because I know what it's like. 451 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:27,800 It's wonderful. 452 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:30,320 Were you left with something like that? 453 00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:31,600 How do you feel on that? 454 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:38,400 I think maybe that's why I have my, I'm missing my problem side is that I'm fearless. 455 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:46,520 I don't fear death and I really don't fear a lot of things. 456 00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:48,960 Like most people will get in their head and question things. 457 00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:50,160 I don't question. 458 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:54,680 It's like that, that critical thinking has turned off for me. 459 00:27:54,680 --> 00:27:58,120 That died when my, when my brain went off. 460 00:27:58,120 --> 00:28:03,800 I'm more in that responsive, you know, and that's part of that post injury learning to 461 00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:05,800 turn on to that critical thinking. 462 00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:09,360 Cause most people do do that. 463 00:28:09,360 --> 00:28:12,400 Is there anything else that you want to share before we go? 464 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:21,840 You know, embrace every single moment that comes into your visual site because it was 465 00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:25,200 put there for a reason. 466 00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:29,600 There is no coincidence in anything that does happen. 467 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:34,280 And that's a whole nother topic, you know, synchronicity and frequencies and vibrations 468 00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:39,600 and all of that has meanings in, in the world. 469 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:40,720 Last question. 470 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:42,760 Did you ever go skiing again? 471 00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:43,760 Absolutely. 472 00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:49,560 Every weekend and all my kids are skiers and yes, I face my fear. 473 00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:51,960 We do wear helmets and it's mandatory. 474 00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:54,000 My kids wear helmets. 475 00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:57,680 I actually think I might go into this winter. 476 00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:04,840 I'd like to get trained to be a paramedic and on the snow paramedic ski patrol. 477 00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:05,840 Hey, thank you. 478 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:06,840 I can't, there you go. 479 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:11,840 I was on the tip of my tongue, but yes, that's what, what I would like to do. 480 00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:13,280 I've reached that point. 481 00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:14,280 It's time. 482 00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:18,680 Well, we need to get you and your family out here to Utah for some real skiing. 483 00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:20,160 Oh, please. 484 00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:21,160 Yes. 485 00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,280 A huge fan of the mountains. 486 00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:24,280 Thank you. 487 00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:26,520 Rebecca, thanks so much for being with me today. 488 00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:27,520 Appreciate it. 489 00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:28,520 Absolutely. 490 00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:31,600 Thank you for having me. 491 00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:34,200 Thank you so much for listening and supporting the show. 492 00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:39,240 Just a reminder, click on over to roundtripdeath.com to make a donation and we'll put a link in 493 00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:40,400 the show notes. 494 00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:56,440 Until then, I wish you every good thing that you're looking for in this life and the next.