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So we got out of the Navy, and during that time I had met Helen in Hawaii.

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Now I grew up in North Carolina on a tobacco farm, and never heard of a Seventh-day Adventist,

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or even met one, but Helen grew up Buddhist in Hawaii.

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Now one of the peculiar things about our different cultures, as you can see right off, is she's

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Oriental Asian, and I'm Caucasian. And she'll tell you a little bit about that.

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But I grew up on a farm. I loved buttermilk, but I hated rice.

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Now when we talk about compatibility, you want a lot of things in common when you are thinking about getting married.

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And so all of this kind of came together, and a lot of things clashed at first because we had two different cultural backgrounds.

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And I'll let Helen tell you just a little bit about how all this came to be before we start.

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We went out to eat one evening, and Ken looked at the menu, and he saw buttermilk on the menu.

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He got all excited because he hadn't had buttermilk for a while, so he ordered some buttermilk.

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I had no idea what buttermilk was. Had never seen it before, didn't know what it tasted like.

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But I'm open to new experiences, and so I thought, you know, I'd like to taste it just to see.

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It looked great. It looked thick and rich, looked like vanilla milkshake to me.

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So now you know what my expectations were. Well, I tasted the buttermilk, and it's impolite to spit it out at the table.

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And I couldn't get up and leave, so I swallowed it. It was the worst thing in the world.

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I thought to myself, this man eats strange foods. But you know, over the years, I have learned to like buttermilk.

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And I've learned to like rice.

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And these are minor differences, but of course, every family, every couple has adjustments to make.

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And you can make those adjustments or have conflict. We decided to make those adjustments.

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For 60 years now, we just got back from Hawaii, and it was a great time and a wonderful place to live, if you can bear the expense.

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Well, it's Thanksgiving time. Let me say, Helen and I have traveled this country far and wide doing seminars.

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We've met a lot of pastors. You've got a good one. Hang on to it. That's all I can say.

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Aaron and I have a lot in common. He started school when he was 31, so did I, after getting out of the Navy.

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We both have the same birthday, so that probably makes us a little bit in tune with each other.

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But I like him, and he does a great job, so he's a good pastor.

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Well, it's Thanksgiving time again. Let me just set the stage for what we're going to look at this morning

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when we all get together in Thanksgiving, and regardless of your religion and your politics and the like,

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we meet each other, we hug each other, we greet each other and say,

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it's been a long time since we saw each other. We've got to do this more often.

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And we all agree, yes, but everyone is so busy.

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And all of a sudden, year after year, pretty soon the kids are up and grown and leaving home.

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Everyone meets together. They take a look at the table.

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There at the center stage, of course, is a turkey or turquettes, as the case may be, or the vegan sandwiches.

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Surrounded by the mashed potatoes, the cranberry sauce, and a lot of hot rolls and steaming gravy,

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everyone admires the food table. All the kids run in and out, hoping for a morsel of food.

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Even the dog is looking for someone to drop something.

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The buffet is lined with pumpkin apple pies, and you can smell the aroma. You can almost taste them.

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Well, that's what Thanksgiving is when you come together, and that's what family is all about.

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It is Thanksgiving. Now, we use a few basic things to help us remember,

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kind of like a nail, which you put your memory bank on.

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Observation. In everything we do in life, especially when we're learning skills and trade,

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observation, what do I see? Not only what do I see, but also how we interpret that,

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because everyone will begin to interpret things differently.

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Look at the scripture, look at the Bible, and all the different denominations.

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What does it mean? How do we interpret it? And then, of course, the application.

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Fred here figured out the wheel, and he's headed to the cliff.

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Now, we look at three stages of math. Now, I don't have to explain this, do I?

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If we do, we're in trouble.

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All right, moving right along. They say a picture is worth a thousand words. That's why we do this.

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My daughter is a psychologist in Atlanta, and she sent me this picture,

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Why Men Should Not Babysit.

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I need not say any more about that.

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There are three basic things that we learn in life, that nothing in your life

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really becomes dynamic and meaningful and powerful to you until it becomes very specific.

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Secondly, we all know better than we do.

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Think about your diet, think about your exercise program.

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We all know better than we do.

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And then lastly, when it comes to evangelism especially, and I'm evangelist at heart,

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most people do the best they can at the time and under the circumstances.

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Now, having said all of that, where do we go?

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Helping families to cope with the stressful times in which we live,

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and they are very stressful today,

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to better understand God's family plan for our lives, individually and corporately,

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and to know God and his guidelines for a happy family,

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to know and understand myself, my personality, my temperament, my spiritual gifts,

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and my value in God's plan,

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to understand the diversity of my family members and how to better communicate,

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love more fully the family that God has given to me,

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and lastly, to understand family as a ministry in which God has called us to be a blessing to our family,

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to each other, to the church, and to the world.

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So the family, it's really all about Jesus and our relationship to him.

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Holidays and families' gatherings can have a super influence on both children and adults,

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the parents especially.

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The restoration from the ministry of healing, 349,

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the restoration, the uplifting of parents underlines every other job that you have,

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including the job at the church.

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Humanity begins in the home.

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The work of parents underlines every other.

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Society is composed of families, and it's what the heads of families make it.

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Now the heads of the family, as is explained in Genesis chapter 1, 2, and 3,

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the heads of the family should be the husband, the husband that holds the family together, and that is it.

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Everything we do in life, especially when it comes to interrelationships with each other,

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personal relationships with each other, especially when two people are in love.

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And this is where Helen and I have worked in family ministry for some 23 years

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and done literally thousands of individuals with temperaments and the computerized personality assessment.

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A lot of times when you look at this little example here, you look at the tree out there in your yard,

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midsummer and the leaves are turning yellow, falling off, and you know it's not time for it.

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There's something going on in that tree or down at the roots.

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When it comes to the behavior of children, we look at what they do, we look at their acts and whatever,

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but there's something else going on deeper inside.

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And that's usually down at the roots where the emotions are.

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When it comes to logic or emotions, a lot of times, especially when it involves love,

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love I call it for young people, when they think they're in love,

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the emotions are going to dictate more so than the logic.

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And that's why we try to encourage young people who think they want to get married

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to look at the emotions and deal with the emotions, but let the logic override the emotions

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because a lot of times the emotions are going to make the final decision,

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which a lot of times leads to marriage and divorce, usually within the first two or three years.

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I've asked many couples who are going through a divorce,

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how soon in the relationship did you realize you had a problem?

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One lady told me, the moment the organ started to play, here comes the bride, I knew I shouldn't do this.

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If in doubt, don't do it.

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Family traditions are passed on from generation to generation,

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or at least one second grade teacher decided she would quiz her students

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on how family traditions may have influenced them.

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And just for fun, this is what she said, a penny saved is what?

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A penny earned. What did the kids say?

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Isn't much.

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You can lead a horse to water, but what did the kids say?

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But they always want something else.

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Early to bed, early to the kids say stinks.

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If at first you don't succeed, eat fruit.

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During this holiday season, you may encounter a lot of things to dialogue and talk about,

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other than politics, I would hope.

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Trivia can make you a lot of money on television programs.

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Gossip is never in vogue.

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And here's a few things to think about.

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Things that most of us would never think to think about.

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The good thing about not knowing what you don't know is the fact that you don't have a clue as to what you don't know.

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And therefore, you happily go about your business as if you know everything there is to know.

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You understand?

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Here's an example.

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Apples, true or false.

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Apples, not caffeine or coffee, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

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Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

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Let's say we know to know that.

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A pack a day smoker will lose approximately two teeth every 10 years.

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People do not get sick from cold weather, but stay inside more often.

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When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart.

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Only 7% of the population are lefties.

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40 people are sent to the hospital every minute for dog bites.

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Wow.

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Babies are born without a kneecap.

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They don't appear until they are two to six years old.

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The average person over 50 will have spent five years waiting in line, especially if you are in the military.

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The brute tooth brush was invented in 1498.

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The average housefly lives for about a month.

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40,000 Americans are injured by the toilet each year.

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Something we never thought about, stretching out a coat hanger.

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It was 44 inches.

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The average computer users blink seven times a minute.

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Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than they are any other time of the day.

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Most of us have eaten a spider while asleep.

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In most television commercials, advertising for milk is usually a mixture of paint and some thinner.

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Prince Charles and Prince William never travel on the same airplane, just in case there was a crash.

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A lot of couples do that, who have children.

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I've encountered a lot of them that do.

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The first Harley Davis motorcycle was built in 1903, and a tomato can was for the carburetor.

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Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cord cut from women who have give birth.

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They are used in vein transplant surgery.

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If coloring was not added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

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Think about that.

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Now, what's the verdict?

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All of them are true.

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Think about number 16, eating a spider.

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The most powerful sermon you will ever preach is your home.

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These things are all true.

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Knowledge, review, what we started with.

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The good thing about not knowing that you don't know something is the fact that you don't have a clue as to what you don't know.

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Therefore, you go about your life as happy as can be, because it really doesn't matter.

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There are important turning points in every person's life.

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I look back at some of the highlights in our marriage and some of the turning points that were just major and wonderful,

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and then a few disappointments also.

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But most of what we are as adults, most of what we live in our everyday life, it happened way back there in our childhood.

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Some years ago, my son gave me a book.

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And on the back cover was this little rendition here.

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All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten.

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And it is so true.

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Most of what I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be, I learned in kindergarten.

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There in the sand pile at Sabbath school, the Sunday school, these are the things that I learned.

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Share everything. Play fair. Don't hit people. Put things back where you found them.

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Clean up your own mess. Don't take things that aren't yours. Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.

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Flush. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.

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Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work.

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Every day some. Take a nap every afternoon. And when you go out into traffic, hold hands and stick together.

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And the last little expression, be aware of wonder.

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I hope it came up on there. Be aware of wonder.

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That's the excitement that's in a child's eye when they learn something new.

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Bible theme from Genesis to Revelation. God depicts his relationship with his people in terms of the family.

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We call each other brother and sister.

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The second coming of Christ is depicted as the bridegroom coming for the bride.

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We are the church. We are the bride.

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We all bring expectations together when we come and greet each other and get to know each other,

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thinking that we might marry this person.

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I tell young people all the time, don't ever date anyone you wouldn't think you wouldn't want to be married to

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because your emotions sometimes will take over and guide you in the wrong direction.

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Learn to know something about that individual.

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For seven years we worked with Forest Lake Academy seniors and helped them to understand themselves better

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using the computerized assessment.

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Secondly, making career choices based on their personality and things like this.

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Those who marry, and I talk about the difference between being compatible and being attracted to each other

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because those are two different things sometimes.

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The person you may be attracted to may not be the person you are really compatible with.

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So it goes both ways.

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Those who marry enter a school from which they will never in this life graduate.

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Adventist Home 105.

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So we look at all the demise of relationships today and they are plenty.

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Divorce, it's a big problem in our country, but there's another looming problem that is getting bigger.

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Marriage has now become obsolete.

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It's in the minority because young people are opting to live together before marriage.

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And that creates a whole multitude of problems.

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One of the problems when we were doing evangelism is we'd encounter couples coming to our meetings.

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They'd already have children, we just assumed they were married,

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but if they went through the study and wanted to be baptized, we find out they never bothered to get married.

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They just have been together for five, ten, fifteen years.

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And that's just the way it is.

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Opposites may be attracted to each other, but people who are more similar get along better

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and have longer lasting relationships.

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This is about family.

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Now some of the stresses in the home.

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We can look briefly at some of these and we can spend a whole hour on each one of them.

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But it's managing time and work.

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That seems to be the biggest problem, even with all today's work-saving devices that we have in the home.

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Managing that time and work and our spiritual side should be included in that.

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Managing money, that's a huge problem today with the economy being what it is today.

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When we have marriage seminars, the average person in our group would have $15,000 to $30,000 outstanding on marriage,

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on their credit cards.

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Any way you can, get out of debt.

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Teenagers, of course, they have their own set of problems today.

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And your pastor knows a lot about the teenage groups that are out there today and how they think differently.

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The average church today, especially after the virus, when we do church meetings,

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the overall view of the audience is gray heads.

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Even Loma Linda, if you watch Loma Linda programs, if you see the audience, you see mostly gray hairs.

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Well, young people aren't really coming back to church, if they ever started to start with.

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They have different views and they have different habits that a lot of times older people like ourselves,

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some of us, don't quite understand.

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But that's kind of where they are.

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So evangelism has to be done a little different today than back in, say, 20 years ago.

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Eating habits.

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Now, that's a problem for today's culture.

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And sleeping habits, of course.

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The sleeping habits is really, really a problem for most people.

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I often talk about this when we are doing people who are very stressful, stressed out.

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Not only they have inherited genetic factors working against them,

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but also part of the inability to sleep and getting the right kind of sleep.

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That's a whole session by itself.

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And then the resilience, the ability to bounce back after trauma, after something has happened in your life.

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Now, had you been out on the freeway, for example, as one lady said this morning,

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she almost got t-boned at the intersection out here at 75.

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Just seconds she had passed by and noticed a car behind her, got t-boned.

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When something like that happens, what happens to the emotions?

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It goes immediately into the long-term memory.

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That's why anything that's very traumatic, it can either be blocked out because it was so traumatic,

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or it would go into the long-term memory and you never forget it.

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It's one of those things that God gave us and blessed us with,

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and sometimes if it's used the wrong way it can be a curse too.

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So today's situation, half of all marriages, plus we hear that all the time, have failed,

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if they even bothered to get married.

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Men and women today are not as committed as they used to be or could be.

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The media hasn't helped.

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TV programs, magazines, pornography, and all these show marriage almost as something to be shunned,

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as if it was just not the best thing to do in life.

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Where is the moral compass our society?

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Have we lost that moral compass in our country, politically speaking and otherwise?

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Under attack in 22 is marriage everywhere, so it seems like.

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The gay and lesbian agenda, taken over, yes.

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There's people in high places that make these things happen.

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The media, magazines, and the like change attitude, change behavior.

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Even some of the prime-time television programs that would normally be called family time television

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present some of these things in a very humors normal way, as if that's just the way life is.

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Even NCIS Hawaii, I don't have to explain it, you watch it, it's terrible.

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It equates any rejection of these things as bigotry, racism, all the adjectives that you already know.

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Names are important.

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In the Old Testament, names meant something about your character,

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the character or the image that people identified you with.

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Names can speak volumes about people groups and even our culture today.

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Even the cars we drive sometimes say something about the culture.

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Years ago, Detroit decided that they would send that little car, Nova.

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How many of you remember that little car, Nova?

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Some of you may have had one.

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Small car, good car.

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Detroit decided they'd sell that little car down in Mexico.

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They sent salespeople down there to promote it.

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It wouldn't sell.

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So they sent some of the top executives from General Motors down to Mexico to put on a big advertising campaign.

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I tell you, that car still would not sell.

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Anybody speak Spanish here?

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Nova means what?

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No go.

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You get that?

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Can you see the macho Mexican male trying to impress his senorito with a no-go car?

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Wouldn't he at least want a Firebird or Thunderbird, something that speaks about power?

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We lived in Orlando for 30-some years until we moved up here to Chigamaga, be close to a family.

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Anyway, our son lived in Atlanta and grandson, and an airline came to Orlando.

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Brand new airline, Kiwi Airlines.

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They offered an introductory price like $27 round trip.

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You couldn't beat that. You couldn't drive it for that.

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Helen and I got us a ticket.

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And we were sitting on the airplane waiting to get out on the runway and take off.

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We were going to go see our grandson.

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Well, I'll tell you, we got pulled over to the side, and two or three big airplanes went by us.

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And we just kept waiting and waiting and waiting.

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And so I take out that little inflight magazine, Kiwi Airlines, Kiwi Airlines.

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Now by this time, we are racing down the runway.

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And I'm reading about Kiwi Airlines, named after a New Zealand bird that cannot fly.

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Names are very important.

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What we and how we call our children, just a tone of voice sometimes,

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can make a world of difference in the reception and the love that's conveyed just in their name.

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You think about that, the trampoline concept.

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Human beings are made for relationship, which requires a support system.

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That's part of the church family that gives support system.

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It's part of your family that should.

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But so many families today are fragmented or polarized so they don't see each other maybe once or twice a year.

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At least there's Thanksgiving, Christmas, and some of the other holidays.

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I was visiting my first church in Florida.

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I was assigned to it and I went to visit some of the inactive members.

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I distinctly remember one lady I went to visit that hadn't been to church in years.

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And so I just call them inactive members.

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And as the visit progressed, she went to the kitchen for something.

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And the little five-year-old girl there, she noticed me looking at all the pictures on the wall in very unusual places,

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what normally would be a little unusual.

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And she started to laugh.

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She said, when mommy gets mad at daddy, she'll throw something at him.

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And if it hits the wall and puts a hole in it, mommy puts a picture over it.

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Well, we had a very fine visit and I got ready to leave and she told me, she said, walk me to the door, she said,

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Pastor Brian, thank you for coming.

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It's been so nice to get reacquainted with what's going on at the church.

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I'm sorry I haven't been there for so long.

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But she said, you know, Pastor, have you ever seen that TV program, Cheers?

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I said, of course.

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Yeah, I've seen it.

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And she said, have you ever listened to the theme song on Cheers?

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I said, yeah, yeah.

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Now, some of you may have heard it.

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How does it go?

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Some of you that are musical.

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Sometimes you want to go where all your problems seem the same and everybody knows your name.

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And she said, that ought to be the theme song for every Adventist church.

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I was taken back by it.

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Absolutely.

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We went to church just a few months ago over in North Carolina and a fellow came up after the service and he said,

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I used to be a bartender.

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And what you said about the Cheers, he said, that is so true.

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You get your regular customers coming in, it's almost like family.

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In fact, you see them come in the door.

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And as a bartender, I knew what drink they were and I'd start preparing it right off.

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And they were so welcoming.

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It was like family.

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I've thought a lot about that since, but it's true.

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We were speaking at a camp meeting some years ago.

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And I asked a question, you know, if you were, like this little statement here, I hope you can see it.

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If you were unconscious and being admitted to ER, how many people would need to be notified if you were in a life-threatening condition?

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Family, relatives, friends, you know, who would be needed to notify?

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The next day after I presented this trampoline, because we all need people in our support system,

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this lady came early with tears in her eyes and she said, I couldn't sleep last night.

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I began thinking about this because I don't have one friend, one friend or relative that would care enough about me

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if I was in the emergency room with life-threatening conditions that they would come.

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That's sad, but that's life.

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And how many people today sit in the pews of churches, even big churches, and they're so lonely.

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They don't have that kind of connection.

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And that's what a church family should be, to understand and help each other.

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The traits of many women, as we look at some of these things, you know,

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there's this unisex movement that came about years ago.

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And I'll tell you, when you go back to Genesis, God made male and female, and He put nothing in between.

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And what we see in our culture today is a sin, great moral sin.

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Here are some of the traits in a very humorous way.

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It's not to say everybody's this way, but there's always exceptions to the rule.

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Oftentimes, men are more logical, where women are more emotional first and then logical.

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You know, it kind of works in the other way, to complement each other.

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Men are more proud and difficult to admit their fears or ask for directions.

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Women are less proud, able to admit their fears and even ask for direction, as they had to.

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That was before GPS came along.

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Men tend to be more objective about things, and women are more intuitive.

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That means you can't lie to them, men, because they know when you're lying.

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It has something to do with your body language.

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Men have a wandering tendency, whereas women tend to have a nesting instinct.

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Men tend to forget little things, and the women remember those little things that you forgot.

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Men are a little bit more independent. Women are relational.

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Now, think of four or five couples at the Olive Garden having a meal.

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If the man has to go to the bathroom, that's it.

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If one of the ladies has to go to the bathroom, she'll stand up and announce it, and four or five of them will go off together.

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They're more relational. It just works out that way somehow.

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Men respond more to sight, and women more to the touch and the verbals.

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Now, what keeps marriages going?

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Some years ago, Psychology Today did a study among 25,000-plus healthy married couples who had been married longer than 25 years.

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And this is what they found out.

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My spouse is my best friend.

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The spouse is best friend for both men and women.

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I like my spouse as a person.

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Marriage is looked at as a long-term commitment. Marriage is sacred.

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This is how they listed all of these categories.

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My spouse has grown more interesting.

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I want the relationship to succeed, the men said, likewise for the women.

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Then it begins to shift.

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And enduring marriage is important to the man's social stability and his peer pressure, peer group.

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Whereas women put, we laugh together.

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We agree on philosophy of life together, whereas the men left that down at the bottom on this list.

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And when young people think they want to get married, they look around, girls will look around, at the availability of young men in the Adventist church.

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And they are outnumbered.

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The girls outnumber the boys usually in that marriage group in the early 20s in the life.

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Then the other problem is because there's a minimum amount of young men available, women postpone marriages later in life.

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And their body clock, of course, is ticking all the time if they're going to have children or something.

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And so all of these things come to bear on when making a decision and how they make that decision.

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So many people in Florida especially, we found the women, Adventist women, thinking they would marry this man, somehow or another he would change,

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and it would be different, much to their disappointment later on.

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And this usually shows up several years after that marriage when they are conflicted in the philosophy of life or the religion, marrying outside the church.

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And so it's been proven over and over again, but somehow or another it's just the way it is.

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And remember, emotions take precedence over the logic for some people.

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So we laugh together, having a sense of humor and a forgiving spirit is one of the things that helps the relationship to grow.

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Now, sometimes we look at temperaments, and I'm sure most of you have been through all the different types of temperaments in your life,

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in your studies, in your church work, and whatever.

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And we will not go through them, but maybe some other occasion in great detail.

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But you remember the melancholy people, you know, those who have all these ups and downs in their emotions and everything,

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and sometimes that gets to be problematic for depression, especially among melancholy people.

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Then you have, now who were the melancholy? Most of the prophets in the Old Testament were melancholy.

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Look at Elijah, one day Mount Carmel, a couple of days later he's running 90 miles away, falls down under a bush and says,

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Lord, why was I born? Just let me die. You see how that mountaintop experience fell to the valley.

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Now you look at Peter, thus saith Peter in the New Testament, speaks more than all the other disciples put together.

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Peter was quick to speak, slow to listen, and that was his problem.

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Right up until the end, when Jesus was taken and going to be crucified, not so Lord, I'll defend you to the death.

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Well, that's the impulsiveness of the Sanquan type person.

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And they rush in sometimes where angels feel to tread. That's just their personality.

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And then you have the phlegmatic, the one who's a guarantee that nothing's going to happen.

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I want security. And look at the little guy with the parachute. He's the phlegmatic.

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Don't want anything to go wrong.

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Of course, the little caloric individual like Paul, Paul in our study for Sabbath school, which was very good.

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Thank you, brother. Paul, beaten, lost in the ocean. I mean, he went through everything you can imagine.

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It's no wonder he said, I die daily in your lesson. That's Paul.

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He was constantly under the threat of physical harm from everywhere and mainly from the Jews, a part of who he was coming out of the Jewish faith there.

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So instructing, training our children according to their temperaments, because sometimes we have three grown children and five grandchildren now.

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But our youngest daughter, who's a psychologist now, our youngest daughter, she would be challenged.

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Whatever happened, she'd challenge it and she'd go to school and she'd ace every test.

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You know, she just had that kind of mindset, academia and all. And so it just never stopped.

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You never stop. Whereas our oldest daughter and birth order has a lot to do with compatibility and success in marriage, too.

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We'll get into that in another session. But our oldest daughter, she'd have to study, study, study to get just a B.

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And so it was like understanding the temperaments in the personality because we had to treat them differently according to their temperament and personality.

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So instructing at children and then how do we discipline? Discipline actually means to disciple.

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How we disciple our children, how we lead them. And then modeling.

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This is perhaps the best training tool of all. We model in front of our children. We let them see that we do pray and we kneel by our bedside.

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We lift them up in names to the Lord. Names are important. They need to know that you're praying for them by name.

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Modeling. And when you have disappointments, yes, they can't see that life is always a bed of roses, but they deal with it as a family.

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And that's what family is all about. Making choices. This is the bottom line. Making choices.

434
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:07,000
What kind of choices do we make? Emotional, logic. Just that simple.

435
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:16,000
And you have to evaluate which one is it, which one's going to have the overbearing reach of making choices about life.

436
00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:22,000
Helen Mailcoat, a psychologist, said this, I was regretting the past, fearing for the future.

437
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:33,000
Suddenly my Lord was speaking and the Lord said, my name is I am. He paused. I waited. He continued.

438
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:43,000
When you live in the future with its problems and fears, it is hard. I am not there. My name is not. I will be.

439
00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:56,000
He continued. When you live in the past with its mistakes and regrets, it is hard. I am not there. My name is not. I was.

440
00:37:56,000 --> 00:38:11,000
When you live in the moment, in the now, it is not hard. I am here. My name is. I am. Thus saith the Lord.

441
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:17,000
Now, as you take away today, you hear that expression a lot, what's the take away today?

442
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Here's some things that will help improve things in your life. Eight hugs a day for married couples.

443
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:32,000
At three full body embraces with each other. When I went to that visit, that lady in the home,

444
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:37,000
you can tell when there's love there when the dog runs behind the couch.

445
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:46,000
I'll tell you, when you do this in front of your children and they see you embrace each other,

446
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:52,000
that you love each other, I'll tell you, it creates a sense of love in the home.

447
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:56,000
And I'll tell you, the dog will start wagging his tail again.

448
00:38:56,000 --> 00:39:03,000
Spend time alone with God every day. Live your faith. Spend time with the family and have family time.

449
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:10,000
Eat at the table once a day at least. Most people, when I say we all know better than we do,

450
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:16,000
when do most people eat the largest meal, morning, noon or night?

451
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:22,000
When is the worst time to eat your largest meal? Meet I say in the mall.

452
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:28,000
Eat at the table at least once a day, not in front of the big screen.

453
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:36,000
Affirm and encourage each other every day and develop a forgiving spirit. Have a date night.

454
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:40,000
I'll tell you, this lady went to see an attorney one time in closing.

455
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:46,000
She said, I have been treated so mean by my husband for years and years. I have had it.

456
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:51,000
I want a divorce. I want it before Christmas even.

457
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:57,000
And I want to just be a bad memory in his psyche.

458
00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:01,000
And the attorney being wise from many years of experience, he said, I'll tell you what,

459
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:09,000
if you really want to hurt him, go home and treat him like the king of the house for 30 days.

460
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:14,000
When he comes home on day 30, you are bagging badges, gone.

461
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:19,000
And he'll really sense the loss and the hurt.

462
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:23,000
Well, 30 days came and went. Another 30 days came and went.

463
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:28,000
He didn't see this lady until one day he was in the mall waiting for his wife doing shopping.

464
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:31,000
And he was sitting there. All of a sudden he saw this lady walking towards him.

465
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:38,000
He said, excuse me, but aren't you the lady who wanted to divorce your husband because he was so mean to you?

466
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:44,000
Divorce my husband? I am married to the most wonderful man in the world.

467
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:49,000
Now what happened? Eight hugs a day, three full body embraces.

468
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:55,000
Eat at the table, have a date night, have a date time. Treat her like the king of the house, men.

469
00:40:55,000 --> 00:41:01,000
And she'll treat you like the king of the house. She'll treat you that way.

470
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Give thanks to the Lord. Praise him. Go out this season, this Thanksgiving season.

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Enjoy your family, your church. Thanking God always for his never-ending love.