WEBVTT 00:00:11.860 --> 00:00:15.300 Hello. Guess who's back. Back again. It's us. 00:00:15.599 --> 00:00:20.940 I'm Clarissa. And I'm Kourtney. Yep. Spoiler 00:00:20.940 --> 00:00:23.679 alert. She's Kourtney . I'm Clarissa. And this 00:00:23.679 --> 00:00:27.179 is 30 Dirty and Dying. And I'm... personifying 00:00:27.179 --> 00:00:29.519 the show today are you dying i mean i'm fine 00:00:29.519 --> 00:00:32.740 i'm just i was up kind of late my sleep schedule 00:00:32.740 --> 00:00:35.399 this week's been really fucking weird had a migraine 00:00:35.399 --> 00:00:37.439 so i like stayed in bed all day the other day 00:00:37.439 --> 00:00:38.820 and they kind of like put me all out of whack 00:00:38.820 --> 00:00:41.119 so you're like you couldn't go to bed because 00:00:41.119 --> 00:00:43.079 you slept all day yeah it was like a whole thing 00:00:43.079 --> 00:00:45.640 yeah so i'm like kind of sleep deprived kind 00:00:45.640 --> 00:00:48.219 of not it it's a whole thing over sleep no sleep 00:00:48.219 --> 00:00:51.240 yeah yeah it's pretty much my album cover so 00:00:51.240 --> 00:00:52.979 i'm gonna call my mixtape i love that thanks 00:00:52.979 --> 00:00:56.450 it's gonna go platinum I don't know what I would 00:00:56.450 --> 00:01:00.710 call my next tape. Crone's Knee. What? Crone's 00:01:00.710 --> 00:01:04.950 Knee. Like Courtney, but Crone's. Sure. Dead 00:01:04.950 --> 00:01:08.390 Mom's Club. Love it. Well, welcome to the 30 00:01:08.390 --> 00:01:11.950 Dirty and Dying Club. We're your hosts, and today 00:01:11.950 --> 00:01:16.709 we're gonna embrace millennial chaos life and 00:01:16.709 --> 00:01:19.310 everything that it's done to us. And you worked 00:01:19.310 --> 00:01:21.409 really hard on this. I did. So we're gonna play 00:01:21.409 --> 00:01:23.180 a game. And I know what you guys are thinking. 00:01:23.340 --> 00:01:27.620 Okay, fucking truth no dare. Ha ha. No, no, no. 00:01:27.959 --> 00:01:32.519 So this is inspired by the Game of Life. Remember 00:01:32.519 --> 00:01:35.420 the board game with the wheel and the cars and 00:01:35.420 --> 00:01:38.299 the, yeah. Yeah. So they have a card game version. 00:01:39.219 --> 00:01:43.299 So this is more inspired by that gameplay. Okay. 00:01:43.340 --> 00:01:45.980 But the vibe is just Game of Life. And I made 00:01:45.980 --> 00:01:50.200 us cards. And we're going to play the Game of 00:01:50.200 --> 00:01:52.689 Life, Millennial Chaos style. I'm excited. This 00:01:52.689 --> 00:01:56.549 is millennial -vide in just a few minutes, but 00:01:56.549 --> 00:01:58.450 what do we have to do first, Courtney? First, 00:01:58.609 --> 00:02:01.370 we have to go back in time. Hell yeah! Back in 00:02:01.370 --> 00:02:12.250 time. Alright! Back in time. Alright! Where are 00:02:12.250 --> 00:02:16.789 we at? 2017! 2017. Um, so I don't know if this 00:02:16.789 --> 00:02:19.830 is why we did this. But in my mind, when we picked 00:02:19.830 --> 00:02:22.250 2017, I was like, that works because that's the 00:02:22.250 --> 00:02:24.770 year that I graduated college. So I was like, 00:02:24.810 --> 00:02:27.789 okay, started my millennial game of life, you 00:02:27.789 --> 00:02:31.530 know, starting block. Right. There I was. I picked 00:02:31.530 --> 00:02:36.330 2017 because, so the game of life itself. Yeah. 00:02:36.389 --> 00:02:39.770 The actual board game added squares for acquiring 00:02:39.770 --> 00:02:43.310 pets in 2017. Oh shit. I didn't know that. I 00:02:43.310 --> 00:02:46.069 haven't played that game in like. They've been 00:02:46.069 --> 00:02:48.530 continuously updating it, adding things to it 00:02:48.530 --> 00:02:51.610 throughout the years. That's really cool. I haven't 00:02:51.610 --> 00:02:54.310 played it in forever. I had it. I don't know 00:02:54.310 --> 00:02:55.789 what happened to the actual board game I had, 00:02:55.969 --> 00:02:58.449 but I remember that I stopped wanting to play 00:02:58.449 --> 00:03:00.370 it because I would play with my dad and he would 00:03:00.370 --> 00:03:04.090 cheat. I mean... He cheated at everything. The 00:03:04.090 --> 00:03:05.830 game of life, but also the real game of life. 00:03:05.930 --> 00:03:11.060 Yeah. My dad disappointed me. Three points. Um, 00:03:11.159 --> 00:03:13.419 but yeah, I remember I got all mad and I like 00:03:13.419 --> 00:03:15.419 didn't want to play it anymore after that. And 00:03:15.419 --> 00:03:17.199 I don't know what happened to the game. I'm sure 00:03:17.199 --> 00:03:20.000 like yard sale or something, but so that's fun 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:23.939 acquiring pets. Yeah. But I also, you know, metaphorically 00:03:23.939 --> 00:03:26.879 or actually. Started my game of life because 00:03:26.879 --> 00:03:30.680 I got engaged to Mike in 2017. Fun. I love that. 00:03:30.819 --> 00:03:32.900 I always forget when you guys got engaged. I 00:03:32.900 --> 00:03:36.080 remember you got married in 18, right? Yep. So 00:03:36.080 --> 00:03:38.120 you got engaged in 17. We went on our first cruise 00:03:38.120 --> 00:03:40.960 in 17. So it started it all. It started it all. 00:03:41.080 --> 00:03:43.960 Yeah. So you're 17. I graduated college. I got, 00:03:44.039 --> 00:03:46.319 you know, like my, well, I'd had my first full 00:03:46.319 --> 00:03:49.659 -time like industry job, but I advanced. I got 00:03:49.659 --> 00:03:52.120 to like really have my big girl job. I met Justin, 00:03:52.280 --> 00:03:56.150 you know, so it was like same deal. Yeah, same 00:03:56.150 --> 00:03:58.750 deal. But did you have, what all did you have 00:03:58.750 --> 00:04:01.050 going on that you wanted to talk about for 2017? 00:04:01.650 --> 00:04:03.889 Well, I posted a couple funny things. Okay, hit 00:04:03.889 --> 00:04:08.590 me, I'm open. I posted, poop jokes aren't my 00:04:08.590 --> 00:04:10.949 favorite kind of jokes, but they're a solid number 00:04:10.949 --> 00:04:15.129 two. Of course you did. Of course you did. Something 00:04:15.129 --> 00:04:17.269 else that was like big in 2017, at least for 00:04:17.269 --> 00:04:23.279 me, LuLaRoe. What's that? It's an MLM. Oh, it's 00:04:23.279 --> 00:04:24.779 a pyramid scheme. It's a pyramid scheme. Got 00:04:24.779 --> 00:04:27.920 it. Okay. What do they sell? The leggings. Oh. 00:04:30.220 --> 00:04:34.040 Isn't there one called Lemon? Lululemon. That's 00:04:34.040 --> 00:04:35.779 not a pyramid scheme. These are different people 00:04:35.779 --> 00:04:39.240 that make leggings. Yes. And they're both named 00:04:39.240 --> 00:04:43.660 Lula or Lulu. Lululemon is like sports or like, 00:04:43.800 --> 00:04:46.139 not sports, but like when you're working out, 00:04:46.160 --> 00:04:50.100 like gym attire, like athletic active wear. Thank 00:04:50.100 --> 00:04:55.180 you. You're welcome. Lularoe. was like, it started 00:04:55.180 --> 00:04:57.540 with leggings. Like they're buttery soft was 00:04:57.540 --> 00:04:59.379 what, I mean, they were actually very soft. I 00:04:59.379 --> 00:05:01.740 still have, I still have the leggings. Okay. 00:05:01.860 --> 00:05:04.360 Um, they came out with other clothes like dresses 00:05:04.360 --> 00:05:08.779 and like shirts and like, it was like whole out. 00:05:08.819 --> 00:05:13.600 They still, it's still a thing. Ah. Um, but I 00:05:13.600 --> 00:05:16.360 posted about 80 % of my Facebook feed is LuLaRoe. 00:05:16.459 --> 00:05:19.680 I do not have a problem. I did. I did have a 00:05:19.680 --> 00:05:22.060 problem. You were in a pyramid scheme. I didn't 00:05:22.060 --> 00:05:24.980 sell it. You were a victim. I was a victim. I 00:05:24.980 --> 00:05:28.279 bought it. I buy it. I buy it. Well, I also, 00:05:28.319 --> 00:05:31.500 so, like, one of the LuLaRoe people that, like, 00:05:31.500 --> 00:05:36.339 I bought from, I offered to, like, help her. 00:05:36.939 --> 00:05:38.800 That's how they get you. And then she, like, 00:05:38.899 --> 00:05:41.579 so, like, whatever hours that I worked, like, 00:05:41.620 --> 00:05:44.399 helping her, like, do whatever. Yeah. I would 00:05:44.399 --> 00:05:48.029 get clothes. I didn't get paid. But I got close, 00:05:48.129 --> 00:05:50.029 and I was like, I'm down. They paid you a merch. 00:05:50.149 --> 00:05:52.089 They paid me a merch, and I was about it. I have 00:05:52.089 --> 00:05:54.089 a ton of leggings. I have a couple dresses that 00:05:54.089 --> 00:05:56.189 I really like. Look at you, you little roadie. 00:05:56.230 --> 00:06:00.310 I know, right? I love to see it. I run. I ran 00:06:00.310 --> 00:06:05.250 two 5Ks in 2017. Wow, look at you, bitch. One 00:06:05.250 --> 00:06:09.610 was in 56 minutes, which I was a little upset 00:06:09.610 --> 00:06:12.339 about. And then the second one was 48 minutes. 00:06:12.459 --> 00:06:15.259 I was a little upset about. I was because like 00:06:15.259 --> 00:06:17.620 you could you could like walk a 5k in like an 00:06:17.620 --> 00:06:20.560 hour. Somebody could, not me. I was a little 00:06:20.560 --> 00:06:25.279 disappointed. But then I ran my third 5k for 00:06:25.279 --> 00:06:28.319 in 48 minutes. I was listening to a podcast the 00:06:28.319 --> 00:06:30.680 other day and they talk about how this guy went 00:06:30.680 --> 00:06:33.660 missing during this like triathlon or something. 00:06:33.720 --> 00:06:36.639 And he was just never seen again. And I was thinking 00:06:36.639 --> 00:06:40.459 to myself. Fucking me. Not because of, like, 00:06:40.540 --> 00:06:44.540 ooh, the spooks, but, like, I'd be 53 days behind 00:06:44.540 --> 00:06:47.800 everyone else. I'm not lost. I'll get to the 00:06:47.800 --> 00:06:50.680 finish line. It'll just be a fucking while. You 00:06:50.680 --> 00:06:51.839 know, you might want to leave and come back. 00:06:52.420 --> 00:06:56.779 And bring a pizza. Duh. Yeah. I also found out 00:06:56.779 --> 00:07:00.579 that Cheeto had kitty acne. Aww. His little cat 00:07:00.579 --> 00:07:03.519 knee. It's not as bad now. That's good. Yeah, 00:07:03.639 --> 00:07:05.540 like, sometimes I'll see it, like, it'll be in 00:07:05.540 --> 00:07:07.379 his chin. Yeah, that's where they usually get 00:07:07.379 --> 00:07:09.199 it, right? Yeah, so, like, I'll, like, clean 00:07:09.199 --> 00:07:10.879 his, like, chin off and stuff like that. Yeah. 00:07:10.879 --> 00:07:12.959 But it hasn't been as bad as it used to be. Yeah, 00:07:13.040 --> 00:07:15.000 sometimes, like, Maisie gets it, but it's hard 00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:17.860 to tell because she has black fur. So it's, like, 00:07:17.860 --> 00:07:19.379 you can't really, but every so often I'll just 00:07:19.379 --> 00:07:21.560 wipe her chin. Well, he's white. Yeah. So you 00:07:21.560 --> 00:07:23.459 can definitely see it. Yeah. I thought of him 00:07:23.459 --> 00:07:27.100 when, like, a year -ish ago, Vlad had this really 00:07:27.100 --> 00:07:29.500 weird, like, abscess on his chin that just popped 00:07:29.500 --> 00:07:32.180 up out of nowhere. And I thought it might be... 00:07:32.480 --> 00:07:34.899 Kitty acne, and I was talking about Cheeto because 00:07:34.899 --> 00:07:37.300 you told me about this. It wasn't. It was just 00:07:37.300 --> 00:07:40.480 like a dermatitis that he scratched at and got 00:07:40.480 --> 00:07:44.500 it infected. But, yep, it reminded me. I remembered 00:07:44.500 --> 00:07:49.079 Cheeto's wise chin words. Yep. I got my fourth 00:07:49.079 --> 00:07:53.540 tattoo. Ooh, which one was that? It was, oh, 00:07:53.560 --> 00:07:56.939 shoot. Is that what it says? I just got my fourth 00:07:56.939 --> 00:07:59.699 tattoo. I wrote it. I didn't, like, I forget 00:07:59.699 --> 00:08:03.199 which one it was. I think it was my arm. You've 00:08:03.199 --> 00:08:04.500 got a couple on your arm. What are you talking 00:08:04.500 --> 00:08:07.480 about? I only have one on my arm. Don't you have... 00:08:07.480 --> 00:08:10.300 This one. Oh, I think it's more than one tattoo 00:08:10.300 --> 00:08:12.480 because it's kind of big. Oh, yeah. No, it's 00:08:12.480 --> 00:08:17.180 one. Okay. All of this stuff is different. Okay. 00:08:17.220 --> 00:08:19.500 But like this... Actual shoulder? Actual one. 00:08:19.620 --> 00:08:21.060 Yeah, I'm pretty sure the shoulder one is my 00:08:21.060 --> 00:08:24.439 fourth one. Okay. But now I have 21. 21? 21. 00:08:25.100 --> 00:08:28.300 I love that. Um, it, the movie came out. I'm 00:08:28.300 --> 00:08:30.420 sure you were excited for that. I was. And then 00:08:30.420 --> 00:08:32.740 psych, the movie came out. I bet you were real 00:08:32.740 --> 00:08:35.019 fucking excited for that. Real fucking. I posted 00:08:35.019 --> 00:08:37.879 about it multiple times. I'm sure you did. I'm 00:08:37.879 --> 00:08:40.360 sure I saw it so many times. I'm just like, don't 00:08:40.360 --> 00:08:42.539 bother me. I'm going to be watching this movie. 00:08:42.620 --> 00:08:44.860 And that was like months beforehand. And I was 00:08:44.860 --> 00:08:47.059 like, it's coming out tonight. Leave me alone. 00:08:49.879 --> 00:08:52.200 I bet I saw that and was like, where are we friends? 00:08:53.519 --> 00:08:56.840 Nobody's fucking bothering you, dude. Could you 00:08:56.840 --> 00:08:59.399 imagine if every time I went into a cave, I was 00:08:59.399 --> 00:09:03.940 like, don't bother me. No one's doing that. No 00:09:03.940 --> 00:09:07.039 one's bothering me, bitch. Well, I went through 00:09:07.039 --> 00:09:12.259 my Instagram for 2017. So this was in 2016. I 00:09:12.259 --> 00:09:15.440 had ended a live -in relationship. So toward 00:09:15.440 --> 00:09:18.799 the end of 16 and into 17, I had my own apartment 00:09:18.799 --> 00:09:21.620 for the first time in a couple of years. And 00:09:21.620 --> 00:09:25.799 it was this, like, tiny little shoebox of an 00:09:25.799 --> 00:09:29.220 apartment. And the bathroom was all pink from, 00:09:29.279 --> 00:09:31.419 like, the 70s. I love that. And I had to sign 00:09:31.419 --> 00:09:33.139 this waiver that says, like, hey, please don't 00:09:33.139 --> 00:09:35.220 chew on the walls because lead paint. Oh, yeah, 00:09:35.299 --> 00:09:38.460 yeah, yeah. Yeah. And it was, I think it's my 00:09:38.460 --> 00:09:41.139 favorite place that I've ever lived, like, by 00:09:41.139 --> 00:09:43.279 myself. Because it was yours. Yeah. It was mine. 00:09:43.379 --> 00:09:45.840 It was just me and Maisie, my cat. It was just 00:09:45.840 --> 00:09:49.720 us. It was, like, our little girl pad. And I 00:09:49.720 --> 00:09:52.320 just loved it. It was my favorite place I've 00:09:52.320 --> 00:09:54.279 ever lived by myself. I think this is an unpopular 00:09:54.279 --> 00:09:58.940 opinion, but I love the old colorful bathrooms. 00:09:59.340 --> 00:10:02.899 Yeah. Like the tub, the sink, and the toilet 00:10:02.899 --> 00:10:06.759 are all like pink or green or blue. I love that. 00:10:06.779 --> 00:10:09.620 Yeah. The bath and the toilet were white, but 00:10:09.620 --> 00:10:13.809 all the tile was pink. From, like, the ceiling 00:10:13.809 --> 00:10:16.710 to the floor. And then the floor tile was a different 00:10:16.710 --> 00:10:19.429 tile, but it was pink. I think the reason I like 00:10:19.429 --> 00:10:21.629 that, the house that I grew up in, well, grew 00:10:21.629 --> 00:10:23.669 up for five years until my parents got divorced. 00:10:23.950 --> 00:10:28.029 It was basically your childhood home. Blue. Really? 00:10:28.169 --> 00:10:31.909 See, my dad's parents, they had one of their 00:10:31.909 --> 00:10:33.990 bathrooms, and the one that we, like, used more 00:10:33.990 --> 00:10:37.250 often than not was, it was blue. And then his, 00:10:37.409 --> 00:10:40.889 actually, wait. I think they had some blue in 00:10:40.889 --> 00:10:43.389 that bathroom, but then his sister, her house 00:10:43.389 --> 00:10:46.190 also had like a blue bathroom. Maybe that's what 00:10:46.190 --> 00:10:48.330 I'm thinking of, but I feel like his mom's house 00:10:48.330 --> 00:10:50.070 also had some blue in one of the bathrooms too. 00:10:50.470 --> 00:10:53.470 And I really liked the blue, although I was pretty 00:10:53.470 --> 00:10:55.370 convinced that my aunt's house was horrifically 00:10:55.370 --> 00:10:59.289 haunted. And I mean, it was, but. I got really 00:10:59.289 --> 00:11:02.769 into makeup. I love that for you. 2016, 2017, 00:11:03.049 --> 00:11:06.269 YouTube beauty influencers. I was all up on that 00:11:06.269 --> 00:11:10.159 train. But I do have some pictures of my apartment. 00:11:11.500 --> 00:11:16.240 I sent my mom this. She sent me something. I 00:11:16.240 --> 00:11:17.620 was telling her something about what was happening 00:11:17.620 --> 00:11:19.139 in my apartment, like something about maintenance. 00:11:19.419 --> 00:11:21.080 And she was like, well, that's ridiculous on 00:11:21.080 --> 00:11:23.600 their part. And I literally said, I know, but 00:11:23.600 --> 00:11:25.559 it could be worse. I could be dead or something. 00:11:25.899 --> 00:11:29.759 So my, I have dark humor and I don't give a fuck 00:11:29.759 --> 00:11:33.720 who knows it, really came out hard. Tay Zonday, 00:11:33.879 --> 00:11:36.500 the Chocolate Rain guy, followed me on Twitter. 00:11:36.600 --> 00:11:38.279 Oh my God. And I posted about it on Instagram. 00:11:38.559 --> 00:11:41.879 Chocolate Rain? Yep. This was before the podcast, 00:11:42.039 --> 00:11:43.879 before I wrote a book. I was nobody. He just 00:11:43.879 --> 00:11:46.179 followed me on Twitter. I love that. Yeah. So 00:11:46.179 --> 00:11:50.919 Tay Zonday, way to go. This is a stupid picture, 00:11:50.980 --> 00:11:53.740 but I feel like I need to. So I became a vegetarian 00:11:53.740 --> 00:11:58.820 in 2016. Well, first I was a vegan. That did 00:11:58.820 --> 00:12:01.519 not last. And then I became a vegetarian. So 00:12:01.519 --> 00:12:04.179 I started experimenting with tofu, right? So 00:12:04.179 --> 00:12:07.419 to eat tofu and to make it, you kind of need 00:12:07.419 --> 00:12:09.740 to get all the water out of it. Right. Most people 00:12:09.740 --> 00:12:13.700 have a tofu press. I was a broke college kid. 00:12:13.820 --> 00:12:15.679 I didn't have a fucking tofu press. Still don't. 00:12:15.779 --> 00:12:20.299 So I made one out of plates, the Bible, Edgar 00:12:20.299 --> 00:12:22.360 Allan Poe's Complete Works, and a Stephen King 00:12:22.360 --> 00:12:24.860 book. I mean, honestly, those are all very heavy 00:12:24.860 --> 00:12:26.519 books. They are. They're the biggest books I 00:12:26.519 --> 00:12:28.929 own. Physically and also... Mentally. Yeah. They're 00:12:28.929 --> 00:12:31.090 all very heavy. I used the biggest books I had. 00:12:31.210 --> 00:12:33.490 Did it turn out good? It was okay. I think I 00:12:33.490 --> 00:12:36.590 have a picture of the... I've had tofu a couple 00:12:36.590 --> 00:12:39.389 times and I don't hate it. Ooh, fake salmon. 00:12:40.149 --> 00:12:41.950 That's what it looks like. No, it's just tofu 00:12:41.950 --> 00:12:47.169 with like a sweet and sour sauce. So I had that. 00:12:47.350 --> 00:12:49.830 I graduated college, like I said. They threw 00:12:49.830 --> 00:12:52.090 me a little party at my job. Cute. I had little 00:12:52.090 --> 00:12:57.139 cupcakes. And I left that job and got like another 00:12:57.139 --> 00:12:59.860 job. So I moved back to our neck of the woods 00:12:59.860 --> 00:13:02.220 the first time. And they threw me a going away 00:13:02.220 --> 00:13:07.759 party. But I asked for not a cake. So they bought 00:13:07.759 --> 00:13:10.700 me a sandwich and put candles in it. Shout out 00:13:10.700 --> 00:13:13.419 Sheetz. Not sponsored, but it could be. I love 00:13:13.419 --> 00:13:16.299 Sheetz. Yep. The mac and cheese bites. Well, 00:13:17.879 --> 00:13:20.100 I do like I really want Sheetz now. We'll get 00:13:20.100 --> 00:13:23.879 it later. Okay. If that's what you want. But 00:13:23.879 --> 00:13:25.740 yeah, so then I moved to my other apartment. 00:13:25.840 --> 00:13:27.720 I was dating Justin and he came to visit me. 00:13:27.720 --> 00:13:29.039 We were doing the long distance thing. So I have 00:13:29.039 --> 00:13:31.159 a lot of pictures of us and our little travels. 00:13:31.460 --> 00:13:34.360 Cute. It was a good year for me. Honestly, 2017 00:13:34.360 --> 00:13:36.320 was a pretty good year. I'm not going to lie. 00:13:36.399 --> 00:13:38.299 2017 was a good year for me too. I was in my 00:13:38.299 --> 00:13:41.120 skinny queen era. Love that. I know. Love that. 00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:42.940 I wasn't. It didn't matter. I finally got to 00:13:42.940 --> 00:13:44.100 the point where I was like, I really don't care 00:13:44.100 --> 00:13:45.940 about my weight. I'm just happy. And if I'm healthy, 00:13:46.039 --> 00:13:48.679 I'm happy. I need to be like that. I need to 00:13:48.679 --> 00:13:49.679 do that. That's kind of where I've gotten. I'm 00:13:49.679 --> 00:13:51.139 not going to say I never have bad days. And I'm 00:13:51.139 --> 00:13:54.840 like, oh, I hate myself. I am lard. But everybody 00:13:54.840 --> 00:13:57.379 has those days. You know? Everybody makes mistakes. 00:13:57.620 --> 00:14:00.559 Yeah. Everybody has those days. Now, okay. Speaking 00:14:00.559 --> 00:14:05.899 of being fat. Yeah. My job, which, because it's 00:14:05.899 --> 00:14:09.360 a new building. Okay. Okay. The gym finally has. 00:14:10.009 --> 00:14:12.789 gym equipment fun and we can start using it without 00:14:12.789 --> 00:14:16.250 students nice so you better believe if i just 00:14:16.250 --> 00:14:19.909 disappear at like noon i'm down in the gym and 00:14:19.909 --> 00:14:22.350 i'm very excited about that gym class hero yeah 00:14:22.350 --> 00:14:23.870 because mike and i are going to epic universe 00:14:23.870 --> 00:14:27.269 in october okay and i gotta fit on all these 00:14:27.269 --> 00:14:30.970 rides fair enough like i know i technically will 00:14:30.970 --> 00:14:33.850 fit in them hey but it's just but i want to be 00:14:33.850 --> 00:14:36.740 i want to be comfy i don't want i want to enjoy 00:14:36.740 --> 00:14:40.179 the ride without like stressing or being sucked 00:14:40.179 --> 00:14:43.179 in you know what i mean so because there's i've 00:14:43.179 --> 00:14:46.299 watched a few videos of like people um who are 00:14:46.299 --> 00:14:49.480 testing it for people who are yeah i follow um 00:14:49.480 --> 00:14:52.779 an account on instagram that does that um i forget 00:14:52.779 --> 00:14:54.840 what they're called but they like the plus size 00:14:54.840 --> 00:14:57.639 roller coaster queens or something yeah so there's 00:14:57.639 --> 00:15:01.139 this one guy who he's probably a similar size 00:15:01.139 --> 00:15:03.960 of Mike, like height and like weight wise, but 00:15:03.960 --> 00:15:06.580 he carries his weight lower, which is like me. 00:15:06.700 --> 00:15:08.279 Yeah. I got you. So like, cause Mike can fit 00:15:08.279 --> 00:15:11.720 onto rides that I struggle with. Um, so this 00:15:11.720 --> 00:15:13.559 guy was like a mix between the both of us and 00:15:13.559 --> 00:15:16.460 he did fit on all of them. Yeah. But he was like, 00:15:16.500 --> 00:15:19.639 if you are uncomfortable, this ride will be uncomfortable 00:15:19.639 --> 00:15:22.759 for you. And I'm like, I gotta be a skinny legend 00:15:22.759 --> 00:15:26.320 by the time I get there. So by October, I would 00:15:26.320 --> 00:15:29.700 like to lose some weight. Okay. I like how we 00:15:29.700 --> 00:15:32.519 went from skinny legend to I'd like to lose some 00:15:32.519 --> 00:15:34.840 weight. Let's be realistic here. Yeah, no, it's 00:15:34.840 --> 00:15:36.740 funny. It's realistic. I like it. I mean, like 00:15:36.740 --> 00:15:38.220 healthy wise. Let's do it healthy, yeah. And 00:15:38.220 --> 00:15:40.059 that's what I want to do. We can all crash diet 00:15:40.059 --> 00:15:42.480 it, but. I don't want to do that. So do you want 00:15:42.480 --> 00:15:44.460 to go out with some songs? Yeah, song. The billboards. 00:15:44.700 --> 00:15:49.240 I said song me up. Song me up. So number one 00:15:49.240 --> 00:15:55.179 on the billboards was Shape of You by Ron Weasley. 00:15:55.890 --> 00:15:57.809 Sorry, I always do that and I almost forgot to 00:15:57.809 --> 00:16:03.509 do it. Number two was Despacito. Despacito. The 00:16:03.509 --> 00:16:06.250 OG or Justin Bieber. This is the remix featuring 00:16:06.250 --> 00:16:08.309 Justin Bieber. The original came out a couple 00:16:08.309 --> 00:16:10.269 years before and then it really... I love that 00:16:10.269 --> 00:16:12.710 song. I don't have the one with Justin Bieber. 00:16:12.809 --> 00:16:15.409 It's not my favorite. But, I mean, Daddy Yankee. 00:16:15.909 --> 00:16:18.769 I've been a Daddy Yankee fan since Gasolina. 00:16:19.330 --> 00:16:24.220 You know? I'm gonna Gasolina. Humble, Kendrick 00:16:24.220 --> 00:16:28.000 Lamar. Sit down. Yep. Be humble. Bad and Bougie 00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:30.299 by Migos. Oh, man. I haven't heard that song 00:16:30.299 --> 00:16:32.379 in a long time. Me neither. I haven't heard Migos 00:16:32.379 --> 00:16:34.419 in a long time, ever since the third one died. 00:16:36.440 --> 00:16:38.480 Closer by the Chainsmokers. Okay. The one they 00:16:38.480 --> 00:16:40.940 did with Halsey. Yeah. I would listen to that 00:16:40.940 --> 00:16:43.700 constantly. I would always listen to this one 00:16:43.700 --> 00:16:46.840 radio station on my way to and from work at this 00:16:46.840 --> 00:16:48.500 paper I was working at, and they were in the 00:16:48.500 --> 00:16:52.940 same building as us. And I mean, it played like 00:16:52.940 --> 00:16:55.139 once an hour. It was on all the time, but I loved 00:16:55.139 --> 00:16:58.259 it. Congratulations by Post Malone. Remember 00:16:58.259 --> 00:17:00.919 when Post Malone did rap? Yeah. I don't know. 00:17:01.279 --> 00:17:05.220 Okay. So there is a concert that is Post Malone 00:17:05.220 --> 00:17:09.660 and Jelly Roll. And I kind of want to go. I would 00:17:09.660 --> 00:17:11.779 go to that. Yeah. I would go to that. I'm not 00:17:11.779 --> 00:17:13.460 a big fan of Post Malone's like country music, 00:17:13.500 --> 00:17:15.619 but I respect it. It's fine. Yeah. But I like 00:17:15.619 --> 00:17:17.319 Jelly Roll. I love his voice. Yeah, he's good. 00:17:17.420 --> 00:17:20.299 It's just not like my favorite. Yeah. But. You 00:17:20.299 --> 00:17:22.039 know, it's fine. But I like Jelly Roll a lot. 00:17:22.339 --> 00:17:24.099 Shout out, Bunny. You're not listening to this, 00:17:24.140 --> 00:17:27.779 but if you were, hello. We love you. Cardi B, 00:17:27.940 --> 00:17:30.400 Bodak Yellow. I almost remember when she... I 00:17:30.400 --> 00:17:34.299 wasn't into Cardi B then. I have... She's grown 00:17:34.299 --> 00:17:36.519 on me. Yeah, it took me about a year to get into... 00:17:36.519 --> 00:17:37.900 And it wasn't an active... I didn't, like, hate 00:17:37.900 --> 00:17:39.859 her. No. I just didn't start listening to the 00:17:39.859 --> 00:17:42.240 music. I thought she was trying to rip off... 00:17:42.240 --> 00:17:44.420 Nicki Minaj. Nicki Minaj. And I did not like 00:17:44.420 --> 00:17:46.299 it. That was the beef, right? I mean, they have 00:17:46.299 --> 00:17:49.559 beef and... I'm not picking a side. I mean, okay. 00:17:50.279 --> 00:17:53.559 I like Cardi B. I like Cardi B's music. I think 00:17:53.559 --> 00:17:55.079 Cardi B is an excellent entertainer. I think 00:17:55.079 --> 00:17:57.200 she's hilarious. Yeah. She's an excellent entertainer. 00:17:57.200 --> 00:17:59.940 I like a lot of her songs. I think Nicki Minaj 00:17:59.940 --> 00:18:04.119 is a better rapper. Yes. But I'm not like, it's 00:18:04.119 --> 00:18:06.660 not, to me, it's not that deep, but I'm not trying 00:18:06.660 --> 00:18:09.819 to get involved in the beef. Yeah. I'm just saying, 00:18:09.839 --> 00:18:11.539 I think Nicki Minaj is a better rapper. I really 00:18:11.539 --> 00:18:14.460 like Nicki Minaj, but I like Cardi B just fine. 00:18:14.599 --> 00:18:18.549 Yeah. I think I started actually, being a willing 00:18:18.549 --> 00:18:22.089 participant of her songs when I saw an interview 00:18:22.089 --> 00:18:23.890 and she was hilarious. And I'm like, you know 00:18:23.890 --> 00:18:26.349 what? I do like her. Yeah, I remember. I had 00:18:26.349 --> 00:18:28.430 to like her as a person before I could like her 00:18:28.430 --> 00:18:31.269 as an artist. But I sought out her music, which 00:18:31.269 --> 00:18:33.009 I never did before. It was just like, it's on 00:18:33.009 --> 00:18:34.349 the radio. It's fine. It's catchy. It's whatever. 00:18:34.630 --> 00:18:37.009 But when she did that SNL appearance and she 00:18:37.009 --> 00:18:39.430 was pregnant for the first time and she sang 00:18:39.430 --> 00:18:43.470 that song, Be Careful, and... I liked the song 00:18:43.470 --> 00:18:45.809 when I saw it on SNL, so I sought her out. I 00:18:45.809 --> 00:18:50.730 realized I liked some of her music. Scars to 00:18:50.730 --> 00:18:53.789 Your Beautiful by Alessia Cara. I don't know 00:18:53.789 --> 00:18:55.470 what that is. I remember the song, I feel like. 00:18:55.750 --> 00:18:58.670 I don't know the words, though. I can't. Hey, 00:18:58.829 --> 00:19:01.390 thanks for listening to 30 Dirty and Dying, the 00:19:01.390 --> 00:19:04.089 show for millennials by millennials. We get real 00:19:04.089 --> 00:19:06.809 about chronic illness, burnout, nostalgia, and 00:19:06.809 --> 00:19:09.519 why we aren't exactly thriving. If that sounds 00:19:09.519 --> 00:19:11.859 like you, join us every Thursday for new episodes. 00:19:11.980 --> 00:19:15.599 Now, back to the show. I based this, like I said, 00:19:15.779 --> 00:19:19.960 inspired by the Game of Life. So the general 00:19:19.960 --> 00:19:22.640 concept is you have a set of circumstances that 00:19:22.640 --> 00:19:24.500 you're going to start out with. And we're going 00:19:24.500 --> 00:19:27.079 to draw Millennial Chaos Life cards. And they're 00:19:27.079 --> 00:19:29.220 all different cards mixed up in this. And they 00:19:29.220 --> 00:19:31.960 have different points, losses, gains, whatever. 00:19:32.519 --> 00:19:36.480 And then, so the way the card game works, the... 00:19:36.839 --> 00:19:38.700 Instead of, obviously there's no board. Right. 00:19:38.759 --> 00:19:40.759 So you can't win that way. Right. But they have 00:19:40.759 --> 00:19:46.339 the word life in the cards. And you have whoever's 00:19:46.339 --> 00:19:48.319 the most points by the time the entire word is 00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:51.059 spelled out. Okay. Is the winner. So what I did 00:19:51.059 --> 00:19:55.640 was, as that is my inspiration, the year 2000 00:19:55.640 --> 00:19:59.140 is hidden within the deck of Millennial Chaos 00:19:59.140 --> 00:20:03.619 life cards. So by the time the last zero. of 00:20:03.619 --> 00:20:06.700 2000 is drawn. Whoever has the most points at 00:20:06.700 --> 00:20:10.740 that point wins. Okay. Fair? Have you, um, so 00:20:10.740 --> 00:20:13.380 there's an adult version of Game of Life. It's 00:20:13.380 --> 00:20:15.940 called Fuck Life or F Life. I don't think I'm 00:20:15.940 --> 00:20:20.339 aware. It's hilarious. Okay. Uh, recommend. All 00:20:20.339 --> 00:20:22.259 right. And there's like a bunch of like, um, 00:20:22.420 --> 00:20:25.140 packs that go along with it. Like expansion packs 00:20:25.140 --> 00:20:27.460 kind of deal. Fun, fun, fun. Okay. I'm sorry. 00:20:27.539 --> 00:20:30.019 I just thought of that while you were saying 00:20:30.019 --> 00:20:33.759 Game of Life. So we're going to start with Relationship 00:20:33.759 --> 00:20:37.799 cards. Okay. Family cards and career cards. Okay. 00:20:37.859 --> 00:20:40.079 So what I'm going to do, I'm making this because 00:20:40.079 --> 00:20:42.640 I do think it's life's all about choices. So 00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:45.359 I'm going to give each of us two cards of these 00:20:45.359 --> 00:20:47.079 and then you can pick which one you want to move 00:20:47.079 --> 00:20:49.339 forward with. Okay. Now there are cards in the 00:20:49.339 --> 00:20:52.519 chaos deck that might change your story. I love 00:20:52.519 --> 00:20:54.500 that. At some point. Okay. But this is where 00:20:54.500 --> 00:20:56.299 we're going to start. There are a lot more career 00:20:56.299 --> 00:20:58.140 cards because, again, there might be switcheroonies. 00:20:58.279 --> 00:20:59.519 I love a switcheroon. So I'm actually going to 00:20:59.519 --> 00:21:01.460 give us three career cards because I feel like 00:21:01.460 --> 00:21:04.940 it's fair. You go first. Okay. So I picked for 00:21:04.940 --> 00:21:09.480 the family card. Okay. Dual income, no kids. 00:21:10.019 --> 00:21:12.970 Nice. I didn't even look at points for all of 00:21:12.970 --> 00:21:14.910 these. I just did it for fun. That's okay. We'll, 00:21:14.910 --> 00:21:17.390 we'll add them up. Relationship card, happily 00:21:17.390 --> 00:21:20.849 married. Okay. And career, storm chaser. Love 00:21:20.849 --> 00:21:24.849 that. Okay. So the point value, just to, so the 00:21:24.849 --> 00:21:28.710 point value with the, with the, uh, the, the 00:21:28.710 --> 00:21:30.210 relationship and the kids ones are all pretty 00:21:30.210 --> 00:21:32.329 equal. Cause I feel like we should not be judged 00:21:32.329 --> 00:21:34.569 for our choices or our family. There's slight 00:21:34.569 --> 00:21:37.539 deviations in them, but. Think of it like tax 00:21:37.539 --> 00:21:41.579 breaks. Right. Um, so, and then, so for the job 00:21:41.579 --> 00:21:43.480 ones though, I tried to base it off like income 00:21:43.480 --> 00:21:45.880 a little bit, like what you might make more money 00:21:45.880 --> 00:21:48.779 with. Yeah. Except for. hidden within here and 00:21:48.779 --> 00:21:50.259 they could be in my deck right now i don't know 00:21:50.259 --> 00:21:52.480 i haven't looked at my cards yet are our actual 00:21:52.480 --> 00:21:55.579 jobs and i made those worth the most points okay 00:21:55.579 --> 00:21:59.279 even though they are not in real life but it's 00:21:59.279 --> 00:22:01.519 our game i mean i'm not making awful money right 00:22:01.519 --> 00:22:03.819 no but i mean it's probably making more than 00:22:03.819 --> 00:22:07.079 doctors right so but in this game we do yeah 00:22:07.079 --> 00:22:08.920 but it's just like a point value right i just 00:22:08.920 --> 00:22:14.420 thought it'd be fun uh i'm a lawyer whoa I'm 00:22:14.420 --> 00:22:17.740 happily unmarried. Okay. Which I am. And my family 00:22:17.740 --> 00:22:19.940 card is the only thing you have to keep alive 00:22:19.940 --> 00:22:21.859 are plants. Love that for you. I'll take it. 00:22:22.299 --> 00:22:25.119 So... I have 160 points. You have 160 points 00:22:25.119 --> 00:22:30.079 to start. Yep. Awesome. And I have... So I have 00:22:30.079 --> 00:22:32.200 160 points to start out. Oh, look at us. We're 00:22:32.200 --> 00:22:35.039 tied. Twinsies! So the rest of the game is we're 00:22:35.039 --> 00:22:37.519 just going to draw the Millennial Chaos life 00:22:37.519 --> 00:22:40.200 cards. And then, like I said, some we might have 00:22:40.200 --> 00:22:42.309 to switch some things out. Okay. Start your first 00:22:42.309 --> 00:22:44.829 card. When life hits, you paid off or had your 00:22:44.829 --> 00:22:47.730 student loan debt forgiven. Gain 50 points. Awesome. 00:22:48.730 --> 00:22:53.289 So Courtney's up to 210. When life hits. Oh, 00:22:53.329 --> 00:22:56.529 no. Oh, no. You've been diagnosed with a chronic 00:22:56.529 --> 00:23:02.190 illness that has onset after age 30. Lose 25 00:23:02.190 --> 00:23:07.990 points. I did. I did have a chronic illness after 00:23:07.990 --> 00:23:10.980 I turned 30. Although I had it before. I just 00:23:10.980 --> 00:23:12.619 didn't know about it. Yeah, but you've been diagnosed 00:23:12.619 --> 00:23:16.740 is what it says. Actually, I lied. I was under 00:23:16.740 --> 00:23:19.599 30 when I found out. I mean, all mine started 00:23:19.599 --> 00:23:24.880 before I was 30, but whatever. All right. The 00:23:24.880 --> 00:23:27.480 cat distribution system has chosen you. Gain 00:23:27.480 --> 00:23:30.619 30 points. Ah, look at you. Oh, man, you are 00:23:30.619 --> 00:23:32.240 running away. You're 100 points ahead of me right 00:23:32.240 --> 00:23:35.880 now. Woo! Millennial milestone. Inner child. 00:23:36.119 --> 00:23:38.079 You found something you've always wanted for 00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:41.619 sale on the internet. Decided to nurture your 00:23:41.619 --> 00:23:44.440 inner millennial child. Gain five points and 00:23:44.440 --> 00:23:50.480 take an extra turn. Fun. So, five points. Fuck. 00:23:51.839 --> 00:23:54.940 Oh no, your biological clock is ticking. Take 00:23:54.940 --> 00:23:57.660 some time to mull over your decisions. Lose a 00:23:57.660 --> 00:24:01.579 turn or pick a new family card. I think I'm going 00:24:01.579 --> 00:24:04.299 to pick a new family card. Okay. Cat or dog parent. 00:24:04.440 --> 00:24:07.160 Yay. Add 40 points. Hell yeah. Well, I guess 00:24:07.160 --> 00:24:09.000 it's add five points. Yeah. Because it's five 00:24:09.000 --> 00:24:11.599 different than my other. Yeah. But still. Yeah. 00:24:11.660 --> 00:24:14.160 I prefer this. All right. So you go two times 00:24:14.160 --> 00:24:16.319 in a row because I'm. Well, no, it said or. Oh. 00:24:16.720 --> 00:24:19.359 Then you just go one time. You were so productive 00:24:19.359 --> 00:24:22.059 today. Like, actually, extra turn. So you're 00:24:22.059 --> 00:24:23.859 right. I do get to go twice. There you go. See, 00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:27.740 I know what's going on. The first zero. I got 00:24:27.740 --> 00:24:29.960 the first zero. You can pick again. Okay. Oh, 00:24:29.960 --> 00:24:33.799 oh, it's magic. The algorithm has changed in 00:24:33.799 --> 00:24:36.059 your favor and you're verified as an influencer. 00:24:37.660 --> 00:24:39.640 If you're an influencer, gain 75 points. If you're 00:24:39.640 --> 00:24:41.660 not, pick another card. But if you're not an 00:24:41.660 --> 00:24:43.720 influencer... Oh, is that a career card? Yeah. 00:24:44.099 --> 00:24:46.220 Okay. So if you're an influencer... So then I 00:24:46.220 --> 00:24:47.819 pick another card. Yeah, you can put that one 00:24:47.819 --> 00:24:49.799 back in the deck, though, because you might become 00:24:49.799 --> 00:24:51.720 an influencer. See, I really tried to make these, 00:24:51.779 --> 00:24:54.859 like, game cards. All right. You found this awesome 00:24:54.859 --> 00:24:58.119 Millennial Chaos podcast, but you didn't leave 00:24:58.119 --> 00:25:01.140 a five -star rating review. Lose 20. Oh, Courtney, 00:25:01.259 --> 00:25:03.940 how dare you not leave us a review? Everyone 00:25:03.940 --> 00:25:06.240 that's listening to this, please leave us five 00:25:06.240 --> 00:25:08.319 stars. Yeah, leave us a rating. Leave us a review 00:25:08.319 --> 00:25:11.119 or you're going to lose 40 points. I know it 00:25:11.119 --> 00:25:12.920 said 20, but I'm going to make it 40 because 00:25:12.920 --> 00:25:15.180 double time. Well, just for you guys. I only 00:25:15.180 --> 00:25:19.319 lose 20. Yeah. Learn from our mistakes. You used 00:25:19.319 --> 00:25:21.960 a Gen Z slang term correctly on the first try. 00:25:22.079 --> 00:25:28.559 Gained 15 points. Hell yeah. I feel so special. 00:25:29.220 --> 00:25:33.329 What Gen Z slang term did you use? Probably my 00:25:33.329 --> 00:25:37.470 favorite one right now is, not right now, my 00:25:37.470 --> 00:25:40.609 favorite one of the last few months is let them 00:25:40.609 --> 00:25:44.210 cook. I love that. Let them cook. Let them cook. 00:25:44.269 --> 00:25:50.190 All right. Unprecedented times. Ah, beans. I 00:25:50.190 --> 00:25:56.170 don't remember writing that. Ah, beans! You're 00:25:56.170 --> 00:25:58.829 now living through another recession. In the 00:25:58.829 --> 00:26:01.970 words of Deji Khaled. What did I say? I know 00:26:01.970 --> 00:26:04.390 I spelled it right. You did, but what did I just 00:26:04.390 --> 00:26:10.210 say? Deji. Okay, Mr. Flexio. In the words of 00:26:10.210 --> 00:26:14.569 Deji Khaled. Another one. Lose 50 points. Oh, 00:26:14.569 --> 00:26:20.410 no! True to life, though. Alright, now we are 00:26:20.410 --> 00:26:23.250 only 10 points apart. You're still ahead, but 00:26:23.250 --> 00:26:26.099 when life hits. I see a cruise ship on that. 00:26:26.720 --> 00:26:29.720 PTO party. You're going on a cruise. Gain 35 00:26:29.720 --> 00:26:32.579 points. Yay. Are you going on a cruise with me? 00:26:32.680 --> 00:26:35.180 Yeah, I'll take you with me. I meant in real 00:26:35.180 --> 00:26:36.579 life. Are you going on a cruise with me? No. 00:26:36.680 --> 00:26:38.920 I don't want to do this. I made that card hoping 00:26:38.920 --> 00:26:42.039 you would get it. Well, now you got it, so you 00:26:42.039 --> 00:26:43.720 have to go on a cruise with me. Fine, I'll go 00:26:43.720 --> 00:26:45.519 on a cruise with you, but, like, I don't know. 00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:48.680 Just pick a good one. Millennial milestone. Could 00:26:48.680 --> 00:26:52.119 it be millennial homeownership? Let's see. If 00:26:52.119 --> 00:26:54.539 you have a total of 175 points or more, here 00:26:54.539 --> 00:26:57.420 are the keys to your new home and 50 extra points. 00:26:57.619 --> 00:27:00.380 If you have less than 175 points, keep renting, 00:27:00.519 --> 00:27:03.420 but collect 35 extra points. You only have 170 00:27:03.420 --> 00:27:10.660 points. 160, 170. With all the cards. I've been 00:27:10.660 --> 00:27:11.940 keeping track the whole time. I know, but I'm 00:27:11.940 --> 00:27:15.200 just double checking. Okay, fine. Put that one 00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:16.940 back in the deck. But did I get my 35 points? 00:27:17.039 --> 00:27:19.140 Yeah, I added it. So if you get that card again 00:27:19.140 --> 00:27:22.450 soon. Without, you know, crazy stuff happening. 00:27:23.609 --> 00:27:30.910 All right. You deserve a little treat, TBH. Gained 00:27:30.910 --> 00:27:32.670 five points. I love that. Just a little treat. 00:27:33.170 --> 00:27:39.029 So, 200. Another millennial milestone. Burnout, 00:27:39.029 --> 00:27:41.829 bitch. Burnout has finally caught up with you 00:27:41.829 --> 00:27:43.809 and you have to make a change. Grab a new career 00:27:43.809 --> 00:27:47.630 card. I would never, ever get burnout at being 00:27:47.630 --> 00:27:50.559 a storm chaser. Well. Too bad. Here's your career 00:27:50.559 --> 00:27:52.259 card. You can give them a shuffle and pick a 00:27:52.259 --> 00:27:55.180 good one. Boo, you whore. I'm a park ranger. 00:27:55.680 --> 00:28:00.799 Nice. Okay. My turn. God damn it. Come on. When 00:28:00.799 --> 00:28:03.000 life hits, your favorite band is going on a comeback 00:28:03.000 --> 00:28:06.099 tour and you can afford tickets. Gain 15 points. 00:28:06.279 --> 00:28:10.380 Yay. Green Day. Yes. Although they never left. 00:28:10.599 --> 00:28:13.640 They were just, they just played at Coachella. 00:28:13.700 --> 00:28:16.160 Oh, did they? Awesome. When life hits, you slept 00:28:16.160 --> 00:28:19.940 on your neck wrong. Lose a turn. Okay. Rip. Rip! 00:28:20.819 --> 00:28:25.480 You lose. You lose! You made it through the Oregon 00:28:25.480 --> 00:28:28.680 Trail with minimal loss of life. Gained 25. You 00:28:28.680 --> 00:28:30.500 made it across the river. Hell yeah, for the 00:28:30.500 --> 00:28:33.329 first time ever. The two. We've only got two 00:28:33.329 --> 00:28:35.950 zeros left. Your favorite nostalgic snack is 00:28:35.950 --> 00:28:38.109 coming back on the shelves for a limited time. 00:28:38.150 --> 00:28:39.710 Gain 15 points. Oh my god, that's how I felt 00:28:39.710 --> 00:28:42.789 when Dunkaroos came back. Absolutely. Mine was 00:28:42.789 --> 00:28:46.950 the Oreo O's cereal. Because I used to fuck that 00:28:46.950 --> 00:28:50.170 up as a kid. I loved it so much. I never really 00:28:50.170 --> 00:28:52.910 had that type of cereal. I rarely did because 00:28:52.910 --> 00:28:55.430 my mom was like, you can't be fat. But a few 00:28:55.430 --> 00:28:57.390 times when I got it and... I was about to say 00:28:57.390 --> 00:28:58.970 that. I'm like, grandma's like, get some special 00:28:58.970 --> 00:29:01.650 cake. Yeah. We're doing the special K challenge 00:29:01.650 --> 00:29:04.430 as a family. Unprecedented times. It's election 00:29:04.430 --> 00:29:07.309 season and experts are calling this one unprecedented. 00:29:07.769 --> 00:29:11.529 You lose hours doom scrolling and become overwhelmed 00:29:11.529 --> 00:29:13.490 with existential dread from following the polls. 00:29:13.650 --> 00:29:16.849 Lose 20 points. Okay. Oh, I got an unprecedented 00:29:16.849 --> 00:29:22.089 times too. Fuck. Weather event. Global warming 00:29:22.089 --> 00:29:27.130 probably. Lose 35 points. I mean, yeah. I tried 00:29:27.130 --> 00:29:32.140 to make these like funny. Okay. Work sucks. I 00:29:32.140 --> 00:29:36.079 know. Lose five points. Work sucks. Forgot I 00:29:36.079 --> 00:29:39.019 made some of these. Work sucks. Why though? I 00:29:39.019 --> 00:29:40.819 made some of these, like some of them are real 00:29:40.819 --> 00:29:42.640 life things and I based them on song lyrics. 00:29:43.019 --> 00:29:46.759 I love that. It's gonna get weird. Um. Oh no! 00:29:47.740 --> 00:29:51.519 Then life hits. Due to gestures wildly, your 00:29:51.519 --> 00:29:54.059 department has been downsized and you're being 00:29:54.059 --> 00:29:57.839 laid off. Lose 50 points and draw a new career 00:29:57.839 --> 00:30:00.430 card. You can read it if you like. I literally 00:30:00.430 --> 00:30:05.230 put gestures wildly. How many points? Lose 50 00:30:05.230 --> 00:30:07.269 points? Lose 50 and get a new career. Yeah, I'm 00:30:07.269 --> 00:30:09.329 gonna do it. Don't worry. Well, I guess I couldn't 00:30:09.329 --> 00:30:11.549 hack it as a lawyer either. You're in the lead 00:30:11.549 --> 00:30:15.490 again. Marine biologist. Woo! Fun. So now I'm 00:30:15.490 --> 00:30:19.730 a marine biologist. We've only got one zero left? 00:30:20.029 --> 00:30:24.109 One zero. Shit. Okay, when life hits, you're 00:30:24.109 --> 00:30:26.529 on a road trip and you pass a mansion in Wisconsin. 00:30:27.450 --> 00:30:30.730 Gained 15 points? Hell yeah. I love the mansion 00:30:30.730 --> 00:30:33.089 in Wisconsin. Who doesn't? Do you like how I 00:30:33.089 --> 00:30:35.089 said it? Because I do. That's why I wanted you 00:30:35.089 --> 00:30:38.670 to say it. He was also playing at Coachella. 00:30:38.809 --> 00:30:41.670 Amazing. This is another lyric one, and I really 00:30:41.670 --> 00:30:44.809 enjoy that I did this. Suddenly, there's hateration 00:30:44.809 --> 00:30:47.849 and holleration in this dancery. Lose 15 points. 00:30:48.470 --> 00:30:51.849 Mary J. Blige. Oh. Don't need no hateration, 00:30:51.849 --> 00:30:57.690 holleration in this dancery. Let's get it percolating. 00:30:58.029 --> 00:31:00.349 Right? Is that the word? I think so. Cool. Yeah, 00:31:00.369 --> 00:31:01.950 okay, I got it right. All right, go ahead. You 00:31:01.950 --> 00:31:04.609 successfully spiced up your life. Gained 15 points. 00:31:06.529 --> 00:31:09.589 Spice up your life. Spice up your life. People 00:31:09.589 --> 00:31:13.410 of the world, spice up your life. Oh. Step into 00:31:13.410 --> 00:31:15.130 the left if you're having a good time. Shake 00:31:15.130 --> 00:31:16.410 it to the right if you know that you're feeling 00:31:16.410 --> 00:31:20.750 fine. Shake it to the front. Go around. Thanks 00:31:20.750 --> 00:31:23.299 for listening to 30 Dirty and Dying. We really 00:31:23.299 --> 00:31:25.059 appreciate your support, and if you want to keep 00:31:25.059 --> 00:31:27.140 up with everything we're doing both on and off 00:31:27.140 --> 00:31:29.900 the air, you can find information at the link 00:31:29.900 --> 00:31:34.140 in our bio on TikTok and Instagram at 30dirtyanddying. 00:31:34.460 --> 00:31:36.319 We've got affiliate links if you want to support 00:31:36.319 --> 00:31:38.380 the things we're doing outside the show. You 00:31:38.380 --> 00:31:40.420 can get in touch with us, find playlists that 00:31:40.420 --> 00:31:42.619 we've made, and everything else that you need 00:31:42.619 --> 00:31:44.460 to keep up with your favorite millennial podcast. 00:31:44.960 --> 00:31:48.509 Now, let's get back to the show. Steve from Blue's 00:31:48.509 --> 00:31:50.650 Clues just made a video that made you feel like 00:31:50.650 --> 00:31:52.890 life is worth living again. Gained 20 points. 00:31:52.990 --> 00:31:56.269 Thank God. I'm so glad Steve listens, you know? 00:31:56.309 --> 00:32:00.450 Me too. I just like, he's like, hi, what's on 00:32:00.450 --> 00:32:03.569 your mind? And he just listens. And I start talking. 00:32:03.809 --> 00:32:06.410 I don't even realize I'm doing it. I just like 00:32:06.410 --> 00:32:10.109 his face. I love everything about him. He makes 00:32:10.109 --> 00:32:13.150 life feel like it's worth living again. Juliet 00:32:13.150 --> 00:32:16.450 checked yes, so run, baby, run. Gained 15 points. 00:32:16.750 --> 00:32:20.869 I'm so funny. Run, baby, run. Don't ever look 00:32:20.869 --> 00:32:24.470 back. I love that song so much. Wow, okay, here 00:32:24.470 --> 00:32:27.230 we go. I think this might be the last lyric one. 00:32:27.269 --> 00:32:28.730 They all got clumped together for some reason. 00:32:29.410 --> 00:32:32.410 You went crazy, but good news. They still call 00:32:32.410 --> 00:32:35.380 you Superman. Gained 15 points. If I go crazy, 00:32:35.480 --> 00:32:39.180 then will you still call me Superman? If I'm 00:32:39.180 --> 00:32:42.680 alive and well, will you be there? Hold my hand. 00:32:42.740 --> 00:32:46.519 I'll take you by my side with my superhuman, 00:32:46.640 --> 00:32:52.240 my aching kryptonite. Way to go. All your toiletries 00:32:52.240 --> 00:32:55.579 have run out at the same time. Lose five points. 00:32:55.759 --> 00:32:59.440 Fuck. I saw that kind of inspired by, I saw this 00:32:59.440 --> 00:33:01.000 meme the other day and it was like, you'll be 00:33:01.000 --> 00:33:02.940 fighting for your life financially and all your 00:33:02.940 --> 00:33:05.539 toiletries will run out at the same time. And 00:33:05.539 --> 00:33:08.859 it's true. Millennial milestone. Burnout, bitch. 00:33:09.140 --> 00:33:10.660 Burnout has finally caught up with you and you 00:33:10.660 --> 00:33:12.680 have to make a change. Grab a new career card. 00:33:13.680 --> 00:33:20.279 It's very true to life. I'm a writer and it's 00:33:20.279 --> 00:33:22.380 the real career. So it's worth a hundred. You 00:33:22.380 --> 00:33:23.940 get your real career. I'll give you the points 00:33:23.940 --> 00:33:27.259 too. Okay. So I'm going to give myself 60. So 00:33:27.259 --> 00:33:30.200 I'm going to give myself 40 points. Okay. So 00:33:30.200 --> 00:33:31.839 if you get yours, I'll give you the difference 00:33:31.839 --> 00:33:36.799 also. Yes. We're still only 15 points apart though. 00:33:37.119 --> 00:33:40.140 Um, do I have 175 points? You have 220. Woo! 00:33:40.319 --> 00:33:42.660 I own a home. I get 50 extra points. Amazing. 00:33:43.079 --> 00:33:46.859 Amazing. Hot new trend. Millennial milestone. 00:33:47.319 --> 00:33:50.000 Reboot me, daddy. Oh. Hollywood is rebooting 00:33:50.000 --> 00:33:52.299 your favorite early 2000s movie, but it's not 00:33:52.299 --> 00:33:54.619 living up to the hype. Take some time to rewatch 00:33:54.619 --> 00:33:56.759 the original and skip your next turn. Go ahead. 00:33:56.940 --> 00:34:01.279 Go ahead. More unprecedented times. Political 00:34:01.279 --> 00:34:06.299 pandemonium has created, you guessed it, an unprecedented 00:34:06.299 --> 00:34:08.719 situation. Apparently World War III is being 00:34:08.719 --> 00:34:11.619 started. Chaos and dread ensue. Lose 40 points. 00:34:11.820 --> 00:34:16.030 Ugh. We are only five points apart now. But you 00:34:16.030 --> 00:34:18.289 get another turn. Another unprecedented times. 00:34:18.449 --> 00:34:22.489 Fuck. Oh, beans. Another. Another. It's the same 00:34:22.489 --> 00:34:23.949 thing. It's the same part. I made more than one 00:34:23.949 --> 00:34:25.550 because we've been through so many recessions. 00:34:25.570 --> 00:34:28.210 Okay. Well, DJ Khaled said another one and I 00:34:28.210 --> 00:34:32.469 lose 50 points. Oh, no. All right. Oh, beans. 00:34:33.610 --> 00:34:36.929 Millennial milestone. Level up love. You're feeling 00:34:36.929 --> 00:34:38.969 like it's time to take your relationship status 00:34:38.969 --> 00:34:41.630 to the next level. If you're married, if you're. 00:34:42.920 --> 00:34:47.039 If you're married, extra 10 points or you can 00:34:47.039 --> 00:34:49.219 draw a new relationship card. If you're unmarried, 00:34:49.219 --> 00:34:51.699 extra 10 points or you can draw a new relationship 00:34:51.699 --> 00:34:54.679 card. If you're single, you draw a new relationship 00:34:54.679 --> 00:34:58.260 card or take an extra turn now. I'm happily unmarried. 00:34:58.619 --> 00:35:01.159 I'm going to stay happily unmarried. So 10 more 00:35:01.159 --> 00:35:03.690 points. Okay. Next level. Another one. Another 00:35:03.690 --> 00:35:05.650 one. I like to keep those ones vague because, 00:35:05.710 --> 00:35:07.309 like, another level could mean a lot of things. 00:35:07.550 --> 00:35:09.610 Why do I keep getting the unprecedented times? 00:35:09.630 --> 00:35:12.309 Do a shuffle. Do a shuffle. It's fine. I don't 00:35:12.309 --> 00:35:13.829 know. Some of them, they just got clumped up, 00:35:13.849 --> 00:35:15.809 I think, when I dropped them. So... I'm like, 00:35:15.869 --> 00:35:18.369 that's three unprecedented times in a row. I'm 00:35:18.369 --> 00:35:20.210 already depressed. I mean, it's pretty accurate, 00:35:20.329 --> 00:35:23.389 but I'll let it... I'll watch it be an unprecedented 00:35:23.389 --> 00:35:25.469 time. It might be. I don't know. Is it really? 00:35:26.090 --> 00:35:28.909 Okay, you can't. Again, that's your own fault. 00:35:29.090 --> 00:35:32.599 Global warming! 35? Yeah. The existential dread 00:35:32.599 --> 00:35:35.059 and burnout have caught up with you. Lose a turn. 00:35:35.199 --> 00:35:36.619 You get two turns. Alright, two unprecedented 00:35:36.619 --> 00:35:40.000 times. Let's go. Well, might as well. You have 00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:42.699 two, yeah. There you go. Alright. The algorithm 00:35:42.699 --> 00:35:45.400 has changed your influencer income, has dwindled 00:35:45.400 --> 00:35:47.320 to almost nothing. If you're an influencer, lose 00:35:47.320 --> 00:35:50.199 75 points. If not, pick another card. Okay. Oh 00:35:50.199 --> 00:35:54.309 my gosh, influencer. A real... A reel or TikTok 00:35:54.309 --> 00:35:56.590 has made you gone viral. Gain 30 points or gain 00:35:56.590 --> 00:35:59.230 70 points now and trade in your career card to 00:35:59.230 --> 00:36:01.710 be a full -time influencer. So you can just gain 00:36:01.710 --> 00:36:04.710 30 points, yay, enjoy the viral moment, or you 00:36:04.710 --> 00:36:06.809 can gain 70 points, but you also have to change 00:36:06.809 --> 00:36:08.989 your career to be a full -time influencer. Is 00:36:08.989 --> 00:36:13.449 full -time influencer more points? It's 70, so 00:36:13.449 --> 00:36:15.250 you'll get 70 right now. Okay, I'll change my 00:36:15.250 --> 00:36:18.079 career card. Okay. I'll be a full -time influencer. 00:36:18.300 --> 00:36:20.559 All right. So you, I don't think I made an influencer 00:36:20.559 --> 00:36:22.820 career card, but just you're an influencer. Just 00:36:22.820 --> 00:36:25.139 know that you're an influencer. And my other. 00:36:25.340 --> 00:36:28.699 It was 70 points, right? Yeah. I got it. I got 00:36:28.699 --> 00:36:30.699 it. I got it. Well, I've been keeping everything 00:36:30.699 --> 00:36:33.519 separate so I can recount. No, I got it. I just, 00:36:33.599 --> 00:36:36.000 I got it. But thank you. And when life, I have 00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:38.420 a white, when life hits card, you made a breakthrough 00:36:38.420 --> 00:36:40.340 in therapy. Now you can answer the question. 00:36:40.519 --> 00:36:43.059 Why am I like this? Gain 20 points. Awesome. 00:36:44.489 --> 00:36:46.909 Someone reminded you how long ago the 90s actually 00:36:46.909 --> 00:36:49.690 were. You need time to reflect. Fuck. All right. 00:36:50.170 --> 00:36:52.889 Burnout bitch. So I guess I'm not an influencer 00:36:52.889 --> 00:36:56.110 anymore. Nope. So you can pick a new career card. 00:36:56.349 --> 00:36:59.269 And I will give you a point differential. I'll 00:36:59.269 --> 00:37:01.110 give you whatever the points are for this. I 00:37:01.110 --> 00:37:04.469 am a successful artist. Points is that. 85. Man, 00:37:04.650 --> 00:37:09.230 you just broke 300. Whoa. And then you lost a 00:37:09.230 --> 00:37:12.280 turn, right? Yeah. When life hits, you make the 00:37:12.280 --> 00:37:14.420 perfect nostalgic playlist that gets you through 00:37:14.420 --> 00:37:19.000 another week. Gain five points. Amazing. Amazeballs. 00:37:19.460 --> 00:37:21.380 Hell yeah. All right. Here we go. Here we go. 00:37:21.400 --> 00:37:24.860 Here we go. You're so cool. Extra turn. That's 00:37:24.860 --> 00:37:27.840 it. This is the end. This is the zero. 2000. 00:37:28.860 --> 00:37:33.579 We went to the year 2000. Y2K is hit. Y2K is 00:37:33.579 --> 00:37:37.510 hit. You win. by a long shot. Courtney 320, me 00:37:37.510 --> 00:37:41.449 245. Yes. Do you want to read through the rest 00:37:41.449 --> 00:37:43.829 of my cards? I do. Okay. Weather event, probably 00:37:43.829 --> 00:37:45.210 global warming. Like I said, there were a couple 00:37:45.210 --> 00:37:47.449 unprecedented times. You cried a river and drowned 00:37:47.449 --> 00:37:50.150 the whole world. Lose 15 points. A global health 00:37:50.150 --> 00:37:52.730 crisis has interrupted all life as we know it. 00:37:53.070 --> 00:37:55.349 Prepare for the worst and maybe re -download 00:37:55.349 --> 00:37:58.750 TikTok. Lose 65 points. Congrats, you got a promotion 00:37:58.750 --> 00:38:01.250 at work. Fight burnout and get this bread or 00:38:01.250 --> 00:38:04.210 whatever. Gain 25 points. You're finally beating 00:38:04.210 --> 00:38:07.030 90s 2000 diet culture. You ate a sandwich with 00:38:07.030 --> 00:38:08.989 regular bread and didn't feel guilty. You know, 00:38:09.030 --> 00:38:11.170 I've never felt guilty about eating regular bread. 00:38:11.250 --> 00:38:14.650 Good for you. Oh no, one of your bills unexpectedly 00:38:14.650 --> 00:38:18.949 goes up this month. Lose 7 points. That's random. 00:38:19.289 --> 00:38:22.730 I know. That could have made the maker break. 00:38:23.289 --> 00:38:25.730 When life hits, good news, mercury is out of 00:38:25.730 --> 00:38:29.550 the microwave and you're feeling flirty. And 00:38:29.550 --> 00:38:31.789 you're feeling flirty and thriving for a while. 00:38:31.809 --> 00:38:35.739 Gain 20 points. Hit play. Your favorite movie 00:38:35.739 --> 00:38:37.980 is finally on streaming services again. Gain 00:38:37.980 --> 00:38:40.920 15 points. All that LimeWire downloading caught 00:38:40.920 --> 00:38:42.800 up with you and you need to pay a fine. Lose 00:38:42.800 --> 00:38:46.300 15 points. It's 30 time! You're officially in 00:38:46.300 --> 00:38:49.199 your 30s. Collect an extra 55 points regardless 00:38:49.199 --> 00:38:51.539 of your current life because 30 is when you realize 00:38:51.539 --> 00:38:54.380 life never goes according to plan plus everything's 00:38:54.380 --> 00:38:57.260 made up and the points don't matter. What are 00:38:57.260 --> 00:38:59.460 we? Anyways, can I read the careers? Yeah, go 00:38:59.460 --> 00:39:00.679 for it. You can read the rest of it if you want. 00:39:00.739 --> 00:39:02.699 There's the careers and here's the family cards. 00:39:02.960 --> 00:39:08.360 So we have a banker, a security guard, a farmer, 00:39:08.500 --> 00:39:12.380 office administrator, a registrar. That was the 00:39:12.380 --> 00:39:18.489 hundred. A lawyer. Lawyer. HR professional. Shout 00:39:18.489 --> 00:39:22.030 out HR besties and Jamie. Journalist. I like 00:39:22.030 --> 00:39:24.090 how you forgot to put journalist on it. I was 00:39:24.090 --> 00:39:28.349 just blocking it out. Graphic designer. Cosmetologist. 00:39:29.469 --> 00:39:33.449 Paleontologist. Car salesperson. Warehouse supervisor. 00:39:34.150 --> 00:39:38.699 IT guy. Storm chaser. Park ranger. Marine biologist. 00:39:38.960 --> 00:39:42.179 Hell yeah. So for the family cards, we also had 00:39:42.179 --> 00:39:45.900 Fun Ant. Mm -hmm. Congratulations, it's a human 00:39:45.900 --> 00:39:49.159 child. Oof. House full of kids. Oof. And then 00:39:49.159 --> 00:39:51.480 the relationship cards, you could have also been 00:39:51.480 --> 00:39:54.380 Single and Looking. It's Complicated. Hi, I'm 00:39:54.380 --> 00:39:57.960 Bob. And then Single and Not Looking. Hey, Hasbro. 00:39:58.239 --> 00:40:00.360 I know you're listening. Yeah, get over here. 00:40:00.500 --> 00:40:04.440 We have a Millennial Life game. I think it would 00:40:04.440 --> 00:40:07.639 be fun. We can play F Life, because that's... 00:40:08.289 --> 00:40:11.210 Maybe we'll do that next. Maybe. So I hope you 00:40:11.210 --> 00:40:14.710 guys have enjoyed the game. And if you. I won. 00:40:15.010 --> 00:40:18.150 I won at life. Courtney wins at life. That's 00:40:18.150 --> 00:40:21.110 a first. Did I tell you that? I told you, but 00:40:21.110 --> 00:40:24.690 listeners, my therapist in my last session. Oh, 00:40:24.690 --> 00:40:26.230 yeah. You've got to tell the story. Sidebar. 00:40:26.269 --> 00:40:30.090 Real quick. Please tell the story. She doesn't 00:40:30.090 --> 00:40:32.309 know how to help me. She literally looked at 00:40:32.309 --> 00:40:36.429 me and said, I don't know. Text me about this. 00:40:37.260 --> 00:40:39.500 I think right after it happened, it seemed like. 00:40:39.599 --> 00:40:42.280 I don't know. Yeah, probably. So, please explain, 00:40:42.460 --> 00:40:45.360 because you have to. Okay, so I have a severe 00:40:45.360 --> 00:40:48.699 phobia of throwing up. Which you should know 00:40:48.699 --> 00:40:50.739 if you listen to the show literally at all. It 00:40:50.739 --> 00:40:55.019 comes up surprisingly a lot. Yeah, so more recently... 00:40:55.440 --> 00:40:58.699 I was taking my pill. I already, like, my whole 00:40:58.699 --> 00:41:00.320 life I've struggled with taking pills. But I 00:41:00.320 --> 00:41:02.320 feel like I've gotten better at it. Sure. Because, 00:41:02.500 --> 00:41:05.260 you know, medicated now. You have to. I have 00:41:05.260 --> 00:41:06.980 to take pills all the time, which sucks, but 00:41:06.980 --> 00:41:10.019 whatever. I choked on a pill in the morning. 00:41:11.239 --> 00:41:14.340 Gagged. Panicked. Stopped taking it for a couple 00:41:14.340 --> 00:41:21.199 days. That's your, like, how you respond. Oh, 00:41:21.260 --> 00:41:24.929 no. I shouldn't take this anymore. Not like, 00:41:24.969 --> 00:41:27.010 man, I should really get my throat figured out. 00:41:29.190 --> 00:41:33.110 So I went to my therapist to talk to her about 00:41:33.110 --> 00:41:38.909 this. And she asked me, like, what about the 00:41:38.909 --> 00:41:41.289 choking is what scared me? And I was like, the 00:41:41.289 --> 00:41:43.789 fear of throwing up. Not dying. Because I could 00:41:43.789 --> 00:41:45.630 almost understand if you were like, oh my god, 00:41:45.710 --> 00:41:48.130 I thought I was going to die. No, you just didn't 00:41:48.130 --> 00:41:52.170 want to puke. And I... Looked at her straight 00:41:52.170 --> 00:41:55.550 in the face and was like, gun to my head. Like, 00:41:55.590 --> 00:41:58.949 I'm not lying. I said this to her face. Gun to 00:41:58.949 --> 00:42:03.230 my head. If someone said I will shoot you or 00:42:03.230 --> 00:42:06.610 if you or if you don't throw up, I wouldn't have 00:42:06.610 --> 00:42:10.329 to think about it. Shoot me. And she was like, 00:42:10.449 --> 00:42:14.780 you know what? I don't know, but she did look 00:42:14.780 --> 00:42:17.260 up my Wellbutrin that I'm on. She was like, that 00:42:17.260 --> 00:42:19.920 does come in a liquid form. And I'm like, okay, 00:42:20.000 --> 00:42:22.739 I'll have to talk to my doctor about that. Um, 00:42:22.880 --> 00:42:25.579 but she says she wrote it down and she was like, 00:42:25.619 --> 00:42:28.039 I'm going to look into this. I'm like, okay, 00:42:28.099 --> 00:42:30.730 cool. Love that. But yeah, my therapist doesn't 00:42:30.730 --> 00:42:32.730 know how to help me. I have a severe phobia of 00:42:32.730 --> 00:42:34.849 throwing up. I cannot do it. I would rather die. 00:42:35.210 --> 00:42:37.650 Here's the thing. I, for the longest time, and 00:42:37.650 --> 00:42:39.889 I even called it a phobia, I don't believe that 00:42:39.889 --> 00:42:41.949 it is a phobia anymore. I think this is a compulsive 00:42:41.949 --> 00:42:44.230 thing. I really do. Because the way you're describing 00:42:44.230 --> 00:42:48.530 it is like, it's more than fear. It's like... 00:42:49.239 --> 00:42:52.420 It's insane. It's insane. I'm not trying to judge 00:42:52.420 --> 00:42:55.119 you, but I guess I am. Like, I've never... It 00:42:55.119 --> 00:42:58.460 sounds like how I feel with, like, my obsessive 00:42:58.460 --> 00:43:00.960 compulsive stuff. Like, if I don't do this or 00:43:00.960 --> 00:43:03.380 if this happens or whatever, we will all die. 00:43:03.500 --> 00:43:05.760 And it seems like that's what you're doing over 00:43:05.760 --> 00:43:08.400 the vomit. I don't know. But I love that you're 00:43:08.400 --> 00:43:11.199 gonna maybe be able to make antidepressant smoothies. 00:43:11.719 --> 00:43:16.440 Sick. But also, just a general... tip maybe for 00:43:16.440 --> 00:43:18.800 anybody out there, maybe don't use the phrase 00:43:18.800 --> 00:43:22.659 gun to my head. In therapy? Yeah. As a, as a 00:43:22.659 --> 00:43:26.239 vet here, I wouldn't, it's, it's. She seemed 00:43:26.239 --> 00:43:28.400 okay. I think you just took her by so much surprise 00:43:28.400 --> 00:43:30.659 with what you said after. If it had been anything 00:43:30.659 --> 00:43:33.159 she'd been willing to dance with, but like, yeah, 00:43:33.239 --> 00:43:36.340 I would maybe not recommend saying, using that 00:43:36.340 --> 00:43:40.820 analogy in therapy, maybe ever, but okay. Well, 00:43:40.840 --> 00:43:43.400 she does, I'm not, um. I don't know that you're 00:43:43.400 --> 00:43:46.949 not anymore. Not what? Throwing up happens every 00:43:46.949 --> 00:43:49.030 day. I don't know if you're gonna throw up and 00:43:49.030 --> 00:43:52.889 then immediately commit suicide. That's what 00:43:52.889 --> 00:43:55.989 it sounds like you're saying. I could see - No, 00:43:55.989 --> 00:43:58.210 I said I'd rather kill myself than throw up. 00:43:59.110 --> 00:44:01.789 Not throw up then kill myself. But the logic 00:44:01.789 --> 00:44:04.750 of that tells me that if you fail - Anyways. 00:44:05.579 --> 00:44:07.760 Courtney won at this game of life, but she's 00:44:07.760 --> 00:44:11.800 not winning the others, apparently. And she even 00:44:11.800 --> 00:44:13.880 has played therapy card and it's not helping. 00:44:13.940 --> 00:44:15.800 At least not with that. Not with that. Not with 00:44:15.800 --> 00:44:17.039 that. I don't think anything will help that. 00:44:17.099 --> 00:44:19.760 So we'll have to report back. You're going to 00:44:19.760 --> 00:44:21.219 have to report back to me. I need to know how 00:44:21.219 --> 00:44:23.039 this shakes out. Yeah, it's a few weeks before 00:44:23.039 --> 00:44:24.679 I have my next session. We only do it once a 00:44:24.679 --> 00:44:28.260 month. Well, I can't wait to hear. You know, 00:44:28.300 --> 00:44:30.719 let's all send Courtney our good vibes to not 00:44:30.719 --> 00:44:33.079 vomit so that we can keep doing the show. All 00:44:33.079 --> 00:44:34.360 right, we'll see you guys next time, hopefully, 00:44:34.500 --> 00:44:48.420 unless Courtney throws up. Bye! Hit me in my 00:44:48.420 --> 00:44:48.880 giggle dick.