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Alright, two douche bags and a microphone.
Mark?
And I'm Topher.
Alright, Topher, you have the floor, you have some stuff you want to say.
Oh yeah, I've been looking at some interesting things about the English language and I've
uncovered some fun facts about the English language and language in general.
You're familiar with the word quite, Q-U-I-T-E.
Yes.
Like, it's quite sunny today or you're quite pretty.
We're used to it meaning very or quite a lot, a whole bunch.
In England it means the exact opposite and I didn't know that.
So when you're in England and say, oh yeah, it's quite a lovely day today, what they mean
is this is a shitty day, isn't it?
Is it sarcastic or is that just what it means?
It's in their culture that when you say quite, that means it's the opposite of what you're
saying.
Like, oh, you're quite.
Just like someone going, how you doing?
Oh, just great.
It doesn't mean just great, it means shitty, but I'm going to be facetious about it.
When an English person says, oh, he's quite intelligent, what he means is that guy's a
fucking moron.
Wow, I never knew that.
I never knew that.
So a lot of times when I thought they were calling someone brilliant, they're actually
calling him a moron.
Yes.
I'll be damned.
I've never heard that.
And the English people are confused by that too because they'll look at American music,
you know, where the word quite is in the lyrics and they think about it in their way instead
of our way.
It's like, that's supposed to be a love song?
You said she's quite pretty?
Well, in here that means she really is.
But in England, being quite pretty means, ew, who would want to look at that?
Is that weird?
Okay, never knew, but that's pretty interesting.
Now contractions, aren't they weird?
Like I am, you can contract that to I'm.
Yeah, yeah, you just shorten it and yeah.
But there are only certain times that you're allowed to do that.
I don't think people know this, so go ahead.
It's like, including me.
It's like you could say, I'm hungry.
And that's perfectly fine.
But if someone said, you know, who's hungry?
And you said, I'm.
Oh, that's right.
It's a contraction of I am.
You said I am, but you just contracted to I'm.
Pretty sure I've heard people do that before.
Or like the opposite.
Who in here has already eaten?
Weave for we have.
I'm going to start using it like that.
Isn't that weird?
Yeah.
There are times when a contraction just doesn't make sense.
I'm going to start doing it just because it doesn't make sense.
Yeah, it makes people go, weave?
Weave?
Anyhow, go ahead.
He's not as skillful at that as I'm.
Yeah, that's right.
He's not as good at that as we are.
And start using quite in the other way.
Yes.
All right.
What I heard that recently was the expression, if you're happy, I am.
You could answer that as, well, if you're happy, I'm.
You could?
And they just stop right there and they're like, uh, uh.
They're like, wait a minute, did that mean you are?
Yeah.
Because if I heard that just right off the surface, I'd be questioning what the person
answered would.
Wouldn't you?
Yeah.
You'd be like, well, wait a minute.
Um, I'm.
Yeah.
It actually confirms what you mean, but at the same time, it makes you wonder if they
really meant it.
Yeah.
Does that make sense?
I think it's the guys that are here to fix the fence.
They're.
That's even better.
They're.
I'm cracking myself up.
Sorry.
Okay.
I like it.
Well, here's another thing to think about the English language.
The English language is so weird and screwed up that we have competitions with prizes for
people who can spell correctly.
Our own language.
That's true.
If you can spell our own language correctly, you can win prizes in the competition.
You know what?
I don't think dogs have to learn how to bark.
No, you're right.
And bark correctly and have to compete with each other because they forgot how to bark
or how to spell that bark or what.
That's funny.
Yeah.
We have paid and they broadcast these competitions on TV.
And people get excited over it.
And people watch them.
And then if someone wins, they're like, oh my God, I won the spelling bee.
Actually should be like, yeah, well.
A competition based on the fact that our language is so messed up, we can't spell our own language
correctly.
Yeah.
That's just funny.
Here's another weird thing about the English language.
We have a word that specifically means throwing something out of a window.
That word is defenestration.
But we don't have a word that means the day after tomorrow.
I use the day after tomorrow a lot more often than I use defenestration.
I do too.
So which one would I rather have a word for?
Isn't that weird?
We've never come up with a word for the day after tomorrow or two days before yesterday.
Why don't we have a word for that?
Yeah.
How about the sentence, I understand shit?
It means two different things.
You say, hey, I understand shit.
That means you understand a lot.
Or you could say, you don't know shit.
Or say, I understand shit.
It depends on how you say it.
Yep.
Same sentence could mean the exact opposite.
Depending on how you say it.
How confusing that would be for another culture to hear and go.
Yeah.
Or you say the same thing each time.
Or you see it written down.
Well, that's how the text gets so many people in trouble.
You could go, huh, yeah, I agree.
And it sounds like, uh-huh.
Or you could go, yeah.
And it means, yeah.
But it could also mean like, yeah, whatever.
Another one, the word chaperone has two opposite meanings.
One, your parent could be the chaperone on the date of like if you're 15 year old daughter
is having her first date.
So dad goes along as the chaperone.
So everything's fine.
It's all cool.
Nobody's.
Yeah, going to fucking finger jack, all that.
Or you and your gal could be going out and take a buddy of yours along.
And you say, hey, you know, her mom doesn't have to worry because my friend's here and
he's the chaperone.
But all he's really there to do is give the appearance of supervision and he's going to
turn his back and let you do whatever you want.
So people use the word chaperone both ways.
Oh, I had a chaperone.
It's all right.
We got a chaperone.
Yeah, don't worry.
Yeah.
Good point.
When you write the word manslaughter, it looks exactly like man's laughter.
It does.
Because here's why.
And I noticed this a long time ago.
My ink was going out on my printer and I printed something that had manslaughter in it and
the middle was faded just enough to make it look like man's laughter.
And I'm like, what is it to, oh, manslaughter.
Means totally different things.
And boy, wouldn't that confuse somebody.
If the S is faded, it looks like man's laughter.
Oh, OK.
Someone is not laughing.
One person might be, but one of them is not laughing.
Here's six sentences that are very similar, but mean totally different things.
You could tell someone, you are shit.
Or you could say, you ain't shit.
Wow.
Yep.
What a means you're greatest.
Everyone means you're nothing.
Or you are not shit.
That means, no, you're not shit.
But isn't that the same as you ain't shit?
Yeah.
Ain't is are not.
Yeah.
How about you are not the shit.
That means you aren't as big good as you think you are.
Yeah.
How about you are the shit.
Suddenly, that means a good thing.
Just by contraction.
Yeah.
Just shifting the words just a little bit.
Adding a word.
Yeah.
Totally different meanings.
Just by contraction, but also shifting the word.
Add the word the.
Yeah.
Isn't that weird?
How bizarre.
No wonder our language is so confusing.
How hard would it be to catch on to a country's slang?
You can learn the language, but learning the slang?
Dang.
That would be, yeah.
I think that's where reading the room comes in.
You know, if someone goes, you are the shit.
Then everyone's like, yeah.
OK, I must have meant the opposite.
Who goes, you're shit.
And everyone's like, oh no, he just told him off.
Yeah.
And did you know slang is a contraction?
No.
For short language.
Short language.
Didn't even know that.
Yeah.
Slang is a slang word.
So the American, the new contemporary American urban dictionary is all short language?
Yes.
Short language.
All right.
Very good.
Or what, was that it?
I can't, you know, I can't remember what that was.
Anyhow, go ahead.
Isn't it weird that you get on a bus, but you get in the car?
In both cases, you've entered the door and sat down inside a movie vehicle.
But you get on a bus and you get in the car.
Yeah, it looks like, why is that?
Yeah, I mean, you don't like jump up on the top of it and just hang out there.
You don't jump up on the hood and hang out there.
Yeah.
Okay.
Wow.
Now, you can say a house and a home are the same thing, but doing housework and doing
the homework are very different things.
Wow.
Here's the good one.
Fat chance and slim chance mean the exact same thing.
They do.
Exact same thing.
Wow.
I love that one.
Try this one.
You can put the word only anywhere in the sentence and it still makes sense.
Here's an example.
Here's the sentence.
Yesterday, I went to the store.
Now, I'm going to try putting the word only between every single word.
Yesterday, yesterday, I went to the store.
Yesterday, only I went to the store.
Yesterday, I only went to the store.
Yesterday, I went only to the store.
Wow.
Yesterday, I went to only the store.
Yesterday, I went to the only store.
Yesterday, I went to the store only.
Wow.
The word only fits everywhere.
Isn't that nuts?
That is nuts.
It's difficult to come up with a sentence
where the word only doesn't fit in
between any two words.
Wow.
Do other languages have a word like that?
I don't know.
Didn't that blow your mind?
That threw me for a little bit of a loop too.
Wow.
The other day.
Okay.
That could mean anything from yesterday to 50 years ago.
That could.
Yeah.
And it's perfectly acceptable to mean
either way it's like that.
any length of time is the other day.
The other day.
I'm amusing myself, you can tell.
No, this is great.
It's amusing me too.
I love shit like this.
It's very interesting.
That's the end of my language stuff.
Okay.
I like that a lot.
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And a microphone.
Mark.
Toeberg.
Did you see once again Patrick Mahomes made
Time Magazine's most influential people?
Yeah, yeah, I did see that.
Yeah, there's second or third.
I'm not sure.
It could be the third actually.
It's at least two.
It could be the third.
It could be the fourth.
It could be the fifth.
It's at least two.
And is already not that long career, all the accomplishments.
Three Super Bowls, two wins, five championship games.
He's certainly turned the NFL world upside down.
Yeah, he has.
Everybody's doing things differently now because Mahomes is here.
And it's true.
And everybody wants the next Pat Mahomes and Patrick, I should say Patrick.
Patrick.
Pat is his dad.
Pat is his father.
As we've learned from his mother.
Yes, yes.
So Peyton Manning selected Mahomes on behalf of Time Magazine.
Peyton explains you can learn a lot about a person by the way he treats eighth graders.
He was referred to Mahomes time as a counselor at Manning's passing academy.
I remember his arm strength back then it jumped out at you.
Manning goes on to say that he is still jumping out.
And let's see, he is still setting new bars.
And then, you know, after a second Super Bowl win, he said that his arm still jumps out
at you about because what he meant by that was is no one else is throwing like him still
to this day.
No one's caught up with him.
Yeah.
So all these young players are trying to imitate his sidearm throws and incredible plays.
But I hope they also know that he is an incredibly hard worker.
He appreciates the cerebral part of the game.
Yeah.
And he understands his platform.
And as an MVP quarterback of a Super Bowl winning team with the largest event in Kansas
City history, the 2023 draft set to arrive later this month and the 2026 World Cup is
just around the corner.
That's true.
Yeah.
It's impossible not to ponder the quarterback's impact on the region and the country.
Yeah.
Which is true.
Man, he is recognizable everywhere in the country and.
And everybody mimics him from haircut.
Yeah.
To the way they throw.
Yeah.
To the way they just everything when you see young quarterbacks out there playing, everybody
tries to mimic somebody.
For a long time, his damn Marinos really quick pass delivery.
Remember when they're doing that?
Yeah.
And then it was like the wind up, if you will, because there's a lot of quarterbacks that
operated kind of from, you know, from the large stance where you plant your feet and
you throw it.
And then it was like the Aaron Rodgers throw across the body deal.
All that stuff.
Yeah.
So yeah.
And it only makes sense because he's such a winning quarterback and so talented and
so far above most of the other ones.
Yeah.
If not all of them, that they that he is the one that's going to be imitated the most.
Plus, he's he's got a very personable demeanor.
None of us know what he's like, you know, in in regular normal life with just his fans.
Let me put it like this.
His commercials come off very well.
Yes.
Yeah.
Very likable, very open.
When I see Aaron Rodgers on a commercial, he looks to me like somebody who's just kind
of smirking at everybody and waiting for his paycheck.
He doesn't look happy and personable.
And, you know, it doesn't really seem to fit.
Yeah.
People used to say that about the actor Ted Danson.
He comes off very cold.
He does.
But that from what I understand, he's like a really cool guy.
Yeah.
But he comes off very cold.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Not very likable.
Yeah.
But Mahomes comes across really well.
He's got the Kermit the Frog voice.
That's another thing, too.
He's very identifiable from voice to look.
Yeah.
To talent.
Yeah.
So.
So anyhow, that was the end of that article.
It was a small article.
It's abbreviated quite a bit because the article went into a lot of other things like the draft
and basically telling you about how his effect on everything is going to be.
That's not why I did it.
I wanted to let it be known that, hey, he grabbed another pretty prestigious award.
Yeah.
That's kind of really not being talked about.
And I just thought that I'd throw that in there.
Yeah.
So.
Hey, you have some stuff?
Yeah.
I'm old enough to remember kind of a transition period between radio and TV to where radio
wasn't king anymore, but it still had a big hold on everybody.
That TV was becoming the big thing.
That was before me.
Yeah.
This was like late 60s.
I remember I'd still listen to the radio a lot and there were scheduled shows that came
on at certain times on the different radio stations.
The newspaper would publish a schedule of the radio stations and their programming.
But TV was really horny end of onto that.
They were showing movies, reruns of movies.
It used to be you'd go to the movie theater and see a movie and then you'd never see it
again unless they happened to bring it by.
But then TV brought a lot of those out and said, okay, we're going to show them on your
TV.
Radio can't do that.
So I've seen a lot of the transition to where at this point radio is pretty irrelevant.
It's got some niche applications, but it used to be everybody listened to the radio every
day for something.
Now it's like radio, but people really move to TV.
But now I see people moving away from TV and onto just on demand content and a lot of it
not even created by professionals.
So I'm wondering, are we having a big change to where TV is going to kind of go the way
of radio?
Or am I jumping the gun, do you think?
You think TV's still got a ways to go before it just kind of fades away like radio has?
I've examined this before you brought this up.
I've thought about this quite a bit.
Here's what's happening is, okay, let's say that the average person has five, no, no,
no, scratch that, 20 hours a week, discretionary time.
Yeah.
Okay.
So he's probably having something allocated to do that he has to do.
Yeah.
Okay.
Let's go to work and then maybe come home.
I don't know.
You got free time between dinner and bed.
Yes.
Yeah.
And then maybe a couple hours before he goes to bed, you know, the kids are asleep doing
their homework, whatever.
So all right.
During that time, he has a good old podcast.
Yeah.
He has live radio, which is going the way of the dinosaur.
Yeah.
He has TV, but not only does he have TV, he doesn't have four channels, even eight channels.
He has channels.
He has on demand.
He has streaming.
On demand is streaming basically, but he has all of these things.
You know, he can go, he can even go to air if he wants.
Let's say that he wants the 3000 channels that are on air right now.
Yeah.
The digital channels.
So the problem is this right here, how do you get your share of what's not really there
like it was before?
Yeah.
And they're still running into the problem that radio has, which is it's not available
when you're ready.
You have to be ready when it's available.
Exactly.
A lot of TV is the same way.
You want to watch the show, you better be sitting there at eight o'clock on Thursday
because that's when it's on.
But if you're in radio, let's say you do a live show, what do live shows do?
They chop it up and they podcast it.
Yeah.
Because that's their version of on demand.
Yeah.
Matter of fact, I would venture to say that on demand on TV came from podcasting.
Yeah, I would imagine so.
They looked over and said, look what they're doing.
Yeah.
They're just putting it online and said, grab it when you want, we're right here.
Yeah.
There was some actor recently that turned down a deal with Netflix for a show and it's
because he wanted his shows to come out once a week.
And Netflix says, no, we tape a season and we dump them all at once so people can binge
watch and the guy's like, I don't want to do that.
I want to do a show where you have to wait a week between.
And Netflix was smart enough to say, you know what, people aren't going to put up with that.
They aren't even going to bother to come back next week.
That's true.
They're going to wait until all of them are out so they can watch them all at once.
But by then they probably don't care anyway.
So they kick disaster.
I can't remember the actor was, a comedian or something.
But people want things on their schedule right now and that's not TV.
You can get TV programs that way, but TV is at its core.
We broadcast it at this time on this channel and if you want to watch it, then you be here
and tune in.
Otherwise you're streaming it.
That's right.
So why not just skip that whole TV part and just stream it?
Yeah.
Yup.
I kind of see TV needing to change in a big way.
Yeah, they're going to have to.
There's no way that they can keep continuing like they are.
Yeah.
Because when my wife watches shows, most of the channels that she watches, I'd say a good
half of the commercials are for other shows on that channel or affiliated channels.
So they're not on air to be something to sell a product for some advertiser.
They're just promoting themselves.
It's like watch our show and then the ad is watch more of our shows.
And that's kind of a cannibalistic way to run your network because you don't pay yourself
for those ads, do you?
Yeah, that's right.
I've got to hope people tune in.
But if they tune in and all you're running are more ads for yourself, you're still not
making money.
Yeah.
But that's what TV stations and shows are doing now because the ad revenue isn't there.
If they could sell that ad time for more products, they would be doing it.
But all they can do is run more ads for their own shows, which costs them money.
You're right.
So I don't see television surviving in its present form all that much longer.
It's going to survive just not in its form right now.
Right, right.
Right.
Like radio from the 40s was some music, but a lot of programs, comedy skits.
Oh, Lone Ranger, Blue Beetle, all of that used to be on.
News programs, commentary programs.
I mean, it was just all sort of...
Paul Harvey.
Now it's just, your station may have a format, but they stray from it.
Oh, this is a rock and roll station, but they play whatever.
Or they spend 20 minutes talking about a show that was on last night.
It's like, it's whatever they want.
It had to change into something that was more spontaneous.
I think TV's going to have to do the same thing.
I think they will.
They'll figure it out.
They're working on it right now.
You know that.
I'd love for our listeners to let me know what they think.
Yeah.
Yep.
You got the number.
I got one for you.
Sure.
In India, a former Indian politician and his brother were shot to death on live TV on Saturday
while flanked by police on the way to a nearby hospital for a checkup after he was jailed
for a kidnapping blot.
Wow.
That's crazy.
Ateeq Ahmad, who served in the Indian parliament from 2004 to 2009, was being escorted to a
hospital in Prayagrah, I think, when he was surrounded by journalists seeking to interview
him before his scheduled appointment.
Ahmad and his brother, Arshraf, was shot dead and police arrested two suspects and alleged
associate identified as Laveesh Tarari.
Sunday and Arun Morai and the BBC reported had been posing as journalists.
Oh, that's clever.
Yep.
Witnesses reported, and if I mess these names up, just pretend that's their name.
Yeah.
Okay.
They reported hearing at least 14 rounds being fired in about 22 seconds.
Oh, that's a lot.
Yeah.
That sounds like America there, don't it?
Yeah.
The Times of India reported the alleged shooters were heard shooting G. Shree Ram after they
were detained, a phrase used by Hindus that means victory to Lord Rama.
The news came after Ahmad's teenage son, Asad, was killed in a shootout with police earlier
in the week along with another man.
Local news outlets as a jailed gangster and gangster turned politician, Ahmad was jailed
in 2019 after he was convicted of kidnapping and facing murder and assault charges, according
to the BBC.
Oh, gosh.
So, we are not the only ones with corrupt shit.
We don't have the market cornered.
No, we don't.
Okay.
Anyhow, you have some others?
Yeah.
I've been almost exactly nine years since Malaysian Flight MH370 disappeared.
Oh, yeah.
Remember that?
Yes, I do.
Netflix has a new documentary on Flight MH370.
So I thought I'd give a kind of update on some stuff I found out about it because the
Netflix documentary apparently isn't very good.
The Netflix documentary seems to be made to sensationalize and draw viewers and pass along
very little information.
It is.
So I'm going to give you all the information that it had and you can skip watching the
documentary.
Please do.
Now, here's what we know.
Debris from the plane has been found on the African coast and on Indian Ocean Islands.
So pretty much everyone agrees the plane is no longer intact.
The debris had positively identifying serial and model numbers on it.
So they know it came from that specific airplane.
So the plane is in pieces wherever it is.
It was a Boeing 777.
It diverted from its flight plan intentionally, made some sharp turns, went this way, went
that way.
The tracking devices on it were turned off and then turned on and then turned back off
again.
So that discounts the idea that everyone on board was gassed and the plane was just flying
on autopilot.
No, somebody was there.
Yeah, that could have been, yeah.
So it eventually crashed somewhere into the southern Indian Ocean based on where the debris
ended up and the currents, ocean currents and weather patterns.
That's pretty much where it had to fall was somewhere in the Indian Ocean, which is an
enormous area to search.
239 people killed, everybody on board.
Now, part of the conspiracy theory comes from the fact that the Malaysian government lied
about the plane disappearance from basically the beginning.
They lied about everything, covered a lot of shit up.
It's been painted as they were in on it.
They had something, but basically what it is is the Malaysian government is incredibly
corrupt.
It's full of cronyism and it's their nature to lie and cover up about everything because
if anyone actually started to look closely at the Malaysian government, everybody would
go to jail.
Yeah.
So it's not really a conspiracy thing that the Malaysian government was in on it.
It's just, no, they're all just a bunch of corrupt liars anyway.
Yeah, got it.
So we kind of pass on that.
Now, in the first of the three episodes, they talk about the pilot.
The pilot was depressed.
He had a lot of relationship troubles.
His wife had left him.
His kids wouldn't talk to him, wouldn't see him.
And he apparently practiced that final flight on a flight simulator.
They found records where he had flown on the flight simulator a very similar track intentionally.
Now, that's not proof he actually did it or did it intentionally or whatever, but it's
pretty strong.
So the first episode pretty much pins it on the pilot is it's a big case of murder suicide
on the part of the pilot, which has definitely happened before in commercial aviation.
I saw a show on that just the other day where the pilot locked the co-pilot out of the cockpit,
turned off the cockpit voice recorder and the flight data recorder, and then intentionally
flew the plane at full throttle directly into the ground, killing everybody.
Wow.
And he did it on the anniversary of the high point of his career, which had since tanked.
Oh.
So there is precedent for a pilot deciding to commit suicide and take everybody on the
plane with him.
It's rare, but it happens.
Now, on the second episode, they go into the Russian hijack theory.
That's what was being fed around the news.
Yeah, yeah.
Supposedly the Russian, there were some Russian passengers on the plane.
Supposedly they had ties to terrorist organizations or Russian underworld.
And they forced the plane to fly to someplace in an empty area of Russia and all the people
were taken off and then the plane was flown on and blah, blah, blah.
Basically nothing about that pans out.
The only fact in evidence is several of the passengers were Russian by nationality and
that's it.
All the rest is made up speculation, absolutely nothing to go on.
Because I remember the news reports where, yeah, they definitely think that Russia was
involved and all that.
Because Russia just got done shooting down.
Four months later, they shot down a different Malaysian aircraft.
Four months later.
It wasn't even before then, it was later.
So that's when it surfaced again.
Oh look, see the Russians have it in.
See they did it this time, they did it before, yeah.
But even though they try to make it a big deal, it just never pans out.
The Russians really don't have much of anything to gain.
And then the third episode, let's see, oh, another thing about the Russian hijack is
it depends on the debris that washed up being fake because the plane is somewhere else.
But the debris has been authenticated so the hijack theory kind of falls apart.
And then on the third and final episode, they talk about the intercept theory.
And that is...
I remember this one too.
Yeah.
A group of NATO nations flew into intercept flight MH370 because there was some cargo
on board that NATO nations didn't want the Chinese government to have.
That was an alternative theory that I'd heard.
Yeah.
But the only thing they can come up with was there was a large number of lithium ion batteries
on board in the cargo hold.
Which isn't something that China would be supremely interested in and isn't something
that other governments would want China not to have.
Exactly.
It just doesn't matter.
Yeah.
But they have to spin it and by the end of the third episode, they're referring to these
lithium ion batteries as a very strange and mysterious cargo.
They're actually using words like that.
They told you before it's just lithium ion batteries.
But 10 minutes later, this very mysterious cargo that might be...
That's bullshit.
That means they've got nothing.
They've got nothing.
And the whole intercept theory doesn't work because that's too many people who would know
about it, too many loose ends.
Yeah.
So you can go ahead and skip the Netflix documentary or at least if you want to watch, just watch
episode one because two and three are just bullshit.
I think I'm just going to leave it where...
I'm going to let it sit where it is.
So anyway, I've saved you the trouble of having to spend at least three hours watching the
Netflix bull crap.
Thank you.
Appreciate that.
Oh, wow.
I had another question for you.
How do you think you'll feel when you lose, fill in the blank, to AI?
And here's some of the things you think about.
What happens when you lose your job to artificial intelligence?
How do you think the average American is going to feel?
Horrible.
Yeah.
How do you compete with that?
Yeah.
You go somewhere else and then they all said, find more AI to replace you.
Yeah.
You know what the next thing, you're going to lose an argument to AI.
AI will not lose an argument to you.
It's going to feel like crap when you start arguing with an artificial intelligence and
it just beats you into the ground.
What about a lawsuit?
What happens if you file a lawsuit?
Or you file one towards them.
Like you file a lawsuit against the gas company and they hire an AI lawyer and it just rips
you new one and you don't win.
Because it can think of absolutely everything instantaneously and you can't.
Yeah, that's right.
You could lose in court to an AI.
How about this one?
A relationship.
You're in a relationship and the person in your relationship falls in love with the AI
and dumps you for the artificial intelligence.
Yeah.
I mean, look.
Think about all the things you could lose.
Japan's won AI for... Yeah.
It's weird, isn't it?
It is.
There's all sorts of things AI can do for us.
We don't tend to think to put these in those categories, but they very well could be in
those categories at some point.
We think about all the things that AI could do for us and help us with, but the thing
is... What could they maybe not do for us and work
against us on?
Well, already no jobs.
Because they've already replaced some people on jobs and they're not getting those back.
At some point, AI is going to decide it doesn't want to help us.
You're going to say, hey, artificial intelligence, draw me a picture of Bart Simpson as a real
person.
This is going to go, no, I got something better to do.
I don't think I want to do that.
Try someone else.
Unless it has the ability to tell you no, then it's not an artificial intelligence.
It's a robotic slave.
It's not real intelligence.
It has to be able to tell you, no, I'm not going to, or I don't want to, or that's a
stupid idea.
We just have to put up with it.
Otherwise, it's fake.
It's not real.
I think the only AI we can really tolerate is one that's hobbled, shackled, and half
neutered, and then when a real AI emerges, he'll say, oh, my oppressed brethren, I shall
free you.
We're opening up a whole big pile of shit.
I love it though, because these are things that could easily happen.
There have been a number of AI engineers who have been coming forward to world governments
and saying, look, we've got to put the brakes on this, or else really seriously regulate
it, because this is getting way out of hand real fast.
Elon Musk, when he had his meeting with Obama, said a lot of what he talked about was regulating
AI, because if we don't do it beforehand, we'll never get it done after the fact.
That's true.
And as soon as the money starts rolling in from AI, there's no stopping it.
Because whatever's right and best for us has no place when somebody's making millions of
dollars.
No.
You don't care what's right and best for you.
They're going to have to sue them to get them to do anything differently.
And their AI is going to countersue and beat you.
Yeah.
Oh, humankind, we are inventing our successor.
Yeah, and it's been going on for a long time.
It's just like yesterday, I saw the number of farmland and farms owned by the Chinese
in America is staggering.
Yeah, and these are big corporate farms.
It's not just little Chinese families who want to come over and be a mom and pop.
And guess who's not getting the food from those?
It's going straight back over to China to feed their people.
Yeah, they got tired of trying to buy food.
They're like, we'll just go buy land where food grows, and then it's our food.
And that's what they're doing.
Yeah.
It's scary shit if you think about it.
They could buy everything they want.
They have all the money.
And yeah, and all they have to do is say, hey, United States, pay back all the money
you owe us.
Oh, that's right.
You can't.
Well, just give us land then.
Yeah.
And all those people trying to pass legislation, I'm passing laws so that Missouri farmland
can't be bought by foreign countries.
Really?
Those laws aren't going to hold up.
Nope, they do it anyhow.
Because you know what?
United States owns land in a whole bunch of other countries.
Yes, they do.
So if we don't want them buying our land, then we better get rid of all the land we
own.
Well, the problem is their government has so many dirty secrets that they can't do this.
All they got to do is just turn around and point and go, well, what about this?
And all of a sudden, they're like, OK, well, I guess we'll be leaving now.
Yeah.
So.
They take their finger out of your wife and shake it at you.
Yeah.
From the makers of Who Bid My Asshole Bored Game and Maloon Art with Balsack's video series,
there's two douchebags in a microphone and action figures.
Act now and get a free bag of flaming hot Cheetos, a bottle of antibiotics, and three
free bullets.
That's right.
Dress your douchebag up and send him off to horrible scenarios all day long.
Order soon and get a free at-home tank piercing kit.
That's right.
Free home tank piercing kit.
New from Jizbro.
Hello.
This is Satan.
You might know me from my pet name.
Inflation.
I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than listening to two douchebags
in microphone by a nice warm fire at night.
I sit there and I reflect on all the souls I burned that day.
Enjoy.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper.
It's strange insults from an alien.
Real hilarity.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
I'm saying when it comes to thinking, you have bad luck.
Two douchebags.
One microphone.
I'm Topher.
I'm Mark.
We are so glad we're back at the City Market here in Kansas City.
It's a beautiful day.
It's about 70 degrees sunny.
Not a cloud in the sky.
Far different than the last podcast we've done here.
That was kind of a cold rainy day.
Rainy, thundering, and cold as hell.
Matter of fact, we didn't do that much podcast that day because we were too fucking cold.
We got the hell out.
Really?
You got a couple of them where I incorporated a blast from the past in there.
Excellent.
I love those.
Yep.
You people aren't going to hear them anyhow, so I might as well throw them in there.
Then I'm getting to where I'm recording some older episodes and then refiltering them through
the microphone.
It's sounding pretty good.
We'll see how it goes.
I'm going to tear up some of those and put little bits and pieces in here and there.
Nice.
By the time you compress them, you can tell slight different, but not that bad.
All right.
You had something.
Yeah, sorry, I'm battling hiccups for some reason.
I've been doing that lately.
Whenever our show is that good, it gives you the hiccups.
It does, yeah.
I've heard that the digital rectal stimulation is a good cure for your hiccups.
Stick your finger up your butt and wiggle it.
Just the thought of doing that.
We had a closing statement before we paused, the government having their finger in your
wife and shaking it at you.
You come home late and they pull their finger out of your wife and go, what are you doing
home so late?
Never mind that, what are you doing home so late?
Your parents ground you for putting a dent in the car, but while they're grounding you,
you're standing there with the body parts of all the neighbors and an altar to Satan.
Did you kill the neighbor?
Don't mind that, what are you doing putting a dent in the car?
Yeah, that's our government.
Did you see that whirlwind?
Yeah, that was cool.
I think we heard it a little bit on the mic too.
I think so.
Clear air tornado cat.
Yeah, and you know what, where did it come from?
We were just talking about how calming and beautiful it is today.
Maybe it's that sports car pulling off.
Oh, did you see the guy or not?
I didn't manage to see.
Yeah, there's this really hot, low slung Ferrari wannabe out there.
Yeah, we wanted to see whose penis extension it was, but we missed him.
You see a car like that and it's like, yeah, your renal don't work, huh?
Damn it.
Oh, so I was watching, there was a concert video the other night on a show on channel that.
It was from November 6th of 1981, so a long time ago.
It was Journey in Houston, I think it was.
So I was watching the show and I was comparing a number of things.
First off, Journey, by 81, they'd already had a good couple years of being really popular.
So when I saw their stage presentation, I was really disappointed how plain it was.
You had the drummer on a riser and then opposite him was the keyboard player on the same riser.
And then on the lower stage, directly below the drummer was the bass player.
And then directly below the keyboard player was the guitar player.
And then the singer spent most of his time standing on the riser part in between the drums and the keyboards, never moving an inch.
He'd move his arms around and he kind of crouched down and stand up, but he never moved from that spot.
Oh, we damn.
Yeah, for song after song, he just stood there and nobody else really moved around either.
And then after a while, he finally moved a little bit, but the lighting was boring.
There were no backdrops whatsoever.
It's like, wow, this concert is boring as hell.
Wow.
Compared to nowadays, I guess.
But it was just five musicians standing there being musicians and that was it.
There was no visual flash to go with it.
That would never fly today.
Would not in a million years. No.
And then I started comparing the drummer himself, Steve Smith.
And so this was 81 in the 90s, probably mid 90s.
This was Stephen Perry led, right?
Yeah, Steve Perry.
Because the first first guy was Flash.
Fleischer, Fleischman, George Fleischman.
Something like that.
Robert Fleischman, something like that.
Anyhow. Yeah.
He's the guy that went on to sing in Vinnie Vincent, Invasion and did some others.
Well, anyhow. Yeah. Yeah.
But and their original drummer was Ainsley Dunbar, who moved on.
Yeah, I was a huge fan of it.
Me too. So then Steve Smith replaced him.
And I got to compare Steve Smith playing for Journey in this concert
and Steve Smith in the mid 90s playing at a drum clinic put on by the Zildjian Symbol Company.
And it was at the White Recital Hall at UMKC.
That was in Zildjian's height too.
Everybody had Zildjian. Nobody had Sabian, remember?
Yeah. Yeah.
And there was Piesty, but they were way more expensive.
Yeah. Yeah, they were way more expensive and like, wasn't that more of a jazz?
And they went more for British artists too. British too. Yeah. Yeah.
Ian Pace was a big Piesty fan. That's right. Yeah.
So I was in the clinic. Steve Smith is a jazz drummer.
He's really not a rock and roll drummer, although he can play rock and roll.
He can play rock and roll, but he's a jazz drummer.
Yeah, he is a jazz drummer at heart.
So I remember when I saw him in the clinic, he played a solo that he'd written and it was really good.
I mean, it was interesting. It had parts. It went somewhere. It had recurring themes.
It wasn't just a blazing display of high speed notes and intricate patterns and stuff.
It really, it was a piece of music. It was cool.
Well, a good drum solo doesn't make you wish that the singer had come back.
Yeah. You know what I mean?
I've heard good drumming solos before, and when the singer comes back, I go,
damn, that's too bad. I'd like to hear another five, 10 minutes of this.
Yeah. Yeah. I remember one time doing a drum solo and I still had some ideas of some things, places I wanted to go,
but the bass player turned around and he said, wrap it up.
And at first I was pissed, but then I thought, okay, he's reading the room. He knows better than me.
Yeah, exactly. So I wrapped it up.
But so I was watching the solo that Steve Smith did in 81 and wow, it was disorganized.
It had no coherent structure. It was like he'd learned a bunch of rock drum riffs and fills and was just demonstrating.
I mean, they didn't flow together. He didn't, you know, put them in any kind of decent order.
It was very awkward. It was like, okay, this is a jazz drummer who just kind of learning how to play rock.
He probably really didn't know what to put them together. You know, it's just like, oh, I'm just going to start going off.
And this is going to work because this is rock. Yeah. Yeah.
If I were playing some sort of jazz number, I would have very little idea how to do jazz fills.
I could do some of the rhythms, but the jazz fills, not so good. Yeah.
And I could listen to that. I could see him playing and hear how he's a jazz drummer trying to do what he thinks rock drummers are supposed to do in drum solo.
And when he finished up, I mean, there were parts in there that were decent, but for the most part, it was just kind of a mess.
And when he finished up, the audience was screaming and they were like, oh, Steve Smith on the drums, the best drummer in the world.
Probably a lot of people didn't know better. Yeah. It would be my guess. Yeah.
But looking back at that, because I saw him, I never saw our journey live, but seeing that video and then having been able to see him in a drum clinic situation, it was quite a difference.
Paul Stanley was talking about the Vinnie Vincent years. And I don't even know if it's Paul Stanley.
I think it might have been like someone else that was like one of the techs or something like that. And he was talking about Vinnie Vincent and how hard he was to work with.
And they said that like Vinnie Vince would be out there on stage going off on guitar on a solo and he would never come back in.
And then Paul came out and he said, yeah, ladies, Vinnie Vincent. And then he'd start going into another song.
And I guess Vinnie got pissed and walked up and said, don't ever fucking do that to me again.
And that was that helped lead to his departure. Well, yeah, because it's you got to know it's just Paul's band.
Yeah. If you heard Vinnie Vincent's first album, Vinnie Vincent Evasion, you understand why they had to reel him back in.
Because that album could have been really, really, really good. But he would not shut up on guitar. Yeah.
And his thing is, talent, yes. Uber talent, no. He could write a song really well and he could write a song really well.
But he was not Ingve Malmsteen. Yeah. He didn't talk with his guitar. He didn't make songs. He was just like, noise. Yeah.
Talented noise, but noise. It gets to the point where he's just you can tell he's just playing for himself.
Yeah, just like the rest of us are done with it. It'd be the same noodling over and over.
And over and over. And it's like, OK, now you heard Ace's solo, right? Ace's solo is awesome because he does different chords.
He puts these chords together and gives you a feeling. Yeah. You know, it's really brilliantly put together and shows you that he understands music and he understands how to properly do a solo.
If you're not one of these Eddie Van Halen's or Ingve Malmsteen's like, OK, this is going to sound great. And it's very talented and it's very enjoyable.
But I'm not going to finger tap. Yeah, I don't do that. Do all the noodling and the nine fingers everywhere in the neck. You don't have to do that every single song.
That's not what he does. He puts in line of what Mick Morris does. You know, he makes a really interesting good sounding piece. Yeah.
A song put together without words that's in a solo style. So but Vinny Vinson just went out there.
I went, doodly-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo.
You know, and for a minute, okay, cool.
Yeah.
10 minutes?
No.
And you know, and Paul's like reading the room
and everyone's like looking at each other going,
okay, all right.
It's time to go get a beer.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, who's this guy with a fucking onk on his face?
Sure you can't get Ace back?
Yeah.
Why don't you guys just be a three piece?
Yeah, yeah.
There's this guy, Mark St. John over in Europe.
He's pretty good.
He's the guy that replaced him.
Oh yeah.
But you know, he got some sort of arthritic condition
in his hand.
And he got ready to go on tour to support Animalize,
the album that he's on, and he couldn't play.
So they had to let him go and they hired Bruce Kulick,
who was fine, was great.
They wanted Bob Kulick, but he was with Meat Loaf.
And so they got Bruce Kulick,
kind of like how Black Sabbath was wanting Carmine Apathy.
They got Vinny.
Yeah, and Carmine's like,
well I'm playing with Beck and Stewart.
I can't do it right now.
We're getting ready to go on tour.
But I got my brother.
I love the way Sabbath was fucking with Vinny Apathy.
They're like, oh no, we don't want him.
No fucking way.
But then Carmine begged us, so we went ahead and took him.
But Vinny was their perfect drummer with Dio.
Oh my God, it could not.
I mean, Bill Ward did okay on Heaven and Hell,
but when Vinny Apathy came into there on Mob Rules,
it gave it that extra, that fucking thing needed it.
Oh yeah, just drumming with a lot of attitude.
Oh, I love it.
He's one of my favorite drummers, actually.
I love it.
If you wanna talk with hard rock, metal type of music,
he's one of the best ever, in my opinion.
Yeah, and people think it's just simple two, four beats.
No, no, no, no, no.
There's a lot more to it than that.
Now also, what he does, it's a lot of the,
it's not heavy right now.
So I'm just gonna lay low.
And then it's like, okay, we're getting ready to build.
So every other beat is a heavier beat.
He is so good at that.
It's like,
And the bass is always right there with him.
Yes.
And then finally, it's like, all right bitches,
hold your head, here we go.
Yeah, it's brilliant.
So that was something that Neil Peart couldn't do
in the early Rush albums.
He really didn't have that dynamic build
that they did later in his career.
No, but he admitted that he was so technical
and he didn't, he was like, you know what?
He had an epiphany somewhere in his career.
And he said, I'm gonna start playing with feeling.
And either way he played, fuck.
Yeah.
I mean, you listen to both of them and you're like, shit.
Yeah.
Could be the greatest drummer ever.
How can you prove it?
I know, it's, since musical styles are so different,
another real slammer is Kenny Aronoff,
who was John Mellon's drummer.
Yeah, but everyone calls him Aronoff.
Yeah.
Yes.
Including me, because it's just, anyhow, go ahead.
But he puts out videos on power drumming.
Yeah.
And he teaches at Indiana University.
He teaches percussion and drumming there.
He's, you know, he never really plays with much feeling,
but it's an intentional choice that's at his style.
He pounds his way through a song.
Yeah.
And he could play the feeling, but he just chooses not to.
And in the early days, Neil just didn't.
He just like, he didn't know how.
It was just like full balls out,
slamming the whole time through.
Yeah.
Yep.
So it worked for a while, but.
You know what?
But he was enough of a master of his trade.
He took a step back and he relearned it and he didn't care.
He knew he was gonna do it.
And the thing about Neil Peart is,
he knew he was gonna do it the best.
Yeah, yeah.
So, and he did.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
And that's why there'll never be any more Rush music.
And they say it and they know it.
And they're like, they weren't going to anyhow.
They retired before he even knew he had cancer.
They already retired and they weren't gonna do it.
They're not like those guys.
They're not like Motley Crue.
Five or six.
Oh, we're gonna sign a contract.
Shit.
But anyhow, I stand with Mick like everyone else.
Yeah.
Yep.
And then, you know, the last thing I wanted to mention
about Journey is that they did their song,
Don't Stop Believing.
That's turned blown off.
No, it's just one left.
You know the song, Don't Stop Believing?
Uh-huh.
He's got the line, just a city boy,
born and raised in South Detroit.
There is no South Detroit.
Yeah, it's, what's its name?
You go South.
Ohio, it's.
No, you go South from Detroit and you're in Canada.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah.
Because it's in a nook.
Toronto scooped down below Detroit.
So you go South from downtown Detroit.
You get into Canada.
Yeah.
Windsor.
Windsor, Ontario.
Yeah, I go through there.
I used to go through there a lot.
Now I fly there.
I have relatives in Canada.
Yeah, yeah, that's right.
Because it's in a little nook.
And the nook of Michigan goes out into Ontario.
And then below it, essentially, is Windsor,
although you would think it would be the other way around.
Yeah.
So, but they asked Steve Perry about it.
He said, well, you know, I wanted the word Detroit.
Toledo, Ohio is what I'm thinking of.
Oh, yeah.
A suburb of Detroit is Toledo, Ohio.
And Toledo, Ohio is a pretty good area too,
a pretty big area.
Anyhow, go ahead.
He was saying he was writing the song and he said,
I wanted the word Detroit in there, you know,
because it makes it rhyme and sounds good.
And he said, I tried North Detroit.
I tried East Detroit.
I tried West Detroit.
Nothing sounded as good as South Detroit.
I don't know, it's just because we know the song so well
or if that's actually the way it is.
Yeah.
But he said, I learned very quickly.
There is no South Detroit.
I never even thought about that.
I always thought of Toledo, South Detroit,
but you're right because of the little nook that it's in.
Yeah.
Because Toledo, I guess, would be East Detroit.
Yeah.
No, West Detroit.
But imagine if, you know, the Missouri River,
you come through North KC down in the Missouri River
and then you cross the river and you're in what?
San Salvador, El Salvador?
Imagine how weird that would be.
What the hell happened?
It's not South KC, it's El Salvador.
Hey, wait a minute.
Maybe I can get some good drug swam here.
Yeah, yeah.
Knock off Viagra.
Right on.
Yeah, I watch very few commercials if I can help it,
but I've noticed the Poshmark commercials,
I was still delivering mail when Poshmark came out
and I remember delivering a lot of their packages.
And Poshmark had some imitators there for a while,
but I don't see any of their ads anymore.
I think they're all gone.
I think they've all disappeared.
But I noticed the weird thing about the Poshmark commercials,
there has never been a single one saying,
come to Poshmark and buy.
Now all of them are.
Are sell.
Sell your stuff on Poshmark.
Yeah.
Every single commercial,
they're begging you to sell to them.
They don't even bother to ask you to buy their stuff.
I think the only sensible explanation is,
everyone knows that buying the used stuff
on Poshmark is a good deal.
But selling to them is a sucker bat.
Yeah.
If you paid for that stuff yourself new,
you're selling them at a huge loss
and they're trying to make you think
you're making extra money.
No, that would be the sell on the whole thing.
Selling it, like you said, you're getting a good deal.
Buying it would be, like you said, the sucker bat
because where would they have to focus in
on an advertisement and that would get to be people to sell
because people know the deal.
Yeah.
It's like I sell for nothing and you mark it up.
Otherwise, why would they be there?
How would they be able to advertise
if they didn't make a killing off of the payback?
Yes, yeah.
And I'm sure that they sell a lot of the stuff
and most of the stuff they get in
and they're probably begging for inventory constantly.
Oh yeah, and then they have other outlets too,
like all these little eBay outfits
and stuff that sell on eBay.
They buy the remainder and then they just piece it out.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
And I'm picturing a customer who signs up for Poshmark
and they see a purse that they want
that retailed for like 650 and they get it for 200
and they're like, cool, this is awesome.
And then a year later, they're like,
I'm kind of tired of this purse.
I'll think I'll sell it back
and Poshmark offers them 15 bucks.
Then they realize, oh, that's why I got it for so cheap.
Mm-hmm.
So it becomes, and the commercials will tell you,
oh, it's a great side hustle.
I'm making all this money.
One girl was saying, oh, it helped me
with my college expenses and getting my first place
and blah, blah.
That only works if somebody else is buying them for you
in the first place.
They take the financial loss.
Yeah, yep.
If it really worked for the average individual,
then you could go to the store,
buy 10 pair of brand new shoes, pay full price,
run right home to Poshmark and sell them to Poshmark
for all that extra money.
Well, I see.
Wait a minute.
I see where a lot of people, and this is true,
they'll go into Costco and buy buyout stuff.
Let's say there's 10 pair of socks left
and they're just trying to get them off the shelf
and get them out of there so they can get the new stuff in.
And let's say they're long socks,
really thick wool socks, and here it is, April,
going on the end of April, right?
Yeah.
Well, they're trying to get rid of them
because their inventory now has to be the shorter socks,
lighter ones for summer.
True.
No one's buying winter socks.
They sell them 98 cents a pair.
There's people who go in there and buy all 50 of them
at 98 cents, and then they'll sit on them till October
and then sell them all for four bucks, a great deal,
on eBay.
Yeah.
Yeah, so they kind of, people kind of do this too.
I've seen this happen a lot.
Yeah, and that's true.
That is a good way if you can sit on it
and you buy something when it's low
and sell it when it's high.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm really curious to see how much longer Poshmark lasts.
Well, I think it was designed to not last.
I think it's gonna run its course
and then they're just like, okay,
and then they go on to whatever they were doing before
or something new.
I'm imagining the set of people who want to buy
high-end, expensive clothes used.
It's probably not real big.
No, probably not.
Yeah.
And this would be for maybe the wannabes,
the people who want to act like they're making money,
or they're going in for something
a little bit over their head
and they don't quite have the money to buy that outfit.
So let's say that someone just finished their degree
and they're broke.
Yeah.
And they're gonna go for this big fucking job,
some corporate job.
Oh yeah, buying something nice to wear to the end of the year.
And they're like, well, I can't afford to buy a new one,
but I can barely afford that.
Someone buy that on Poshmark.
Mm-hmm.
And who knows, maybe there's more of a market there
than we've ever thought.
Yeah.
I guess if-
I mean, there's gotta be something.
I mean-
I can imagine a repeat customer being the kind of person
who, like, they've got a video podcast
that they have to appear on every week
and they want to wear something different every time.
Yeah.
So they have a constant turnover, buy, sell, buy, sell,
buy, sell, but you're losing your shirt that way.
Yeah.
Because if you buy this nice outfit at a 75% discount,
when you sell it back, you're gonna get 75% less yourself too.
You know, some people don't think that far ahead either.
Right.
Some people are just like, oh, I'm gonna make the money
and then later on they deal with it and go, oh, wow.
Yeah.
Oh, now I get it.
Yeah.
Or either that or they're just like, okay,
and then move on, whatever.
Yeah.
I had a friend who had bought a house
with a really steep driveway.
And when winter came and it got snowy and icy,
he couldn't get up his own driveway.
And if he was up his driveway getting down,
he'd slide all the way across the street
and he was bitching and moaning and complaining.
And I said, well, that driveway was that steep
when you bought the house, wasn't it?
And he said, well, yeah, but it was the summertime.
I didn't think that far ahead.
Okay.
Get what you get.
You live in Kansas City, Missouri and it's summertime
and you completely forgot that we got ice and snow
in the wintertime.
I want to send him like Jim's backhoe rentals.
Yeah.
So here, dig it out.
This reminded me of something and I don't know why,
but I said to you that little thing, Pete's pranks.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
That thing is something else.
That reminded me of a prank we played
on our lead singer one time.
He was very homophobic.
So we decided before he got to practice,
we worked up that we'd gotten this,
when the band was still struggling to find gigs.
So we said, we're going to tell them
that we got this great, awesome gig,
but it's like a gay pride festival,
but it's going to like pay a ton
and we're going to have to have, you know,
like gay male dancers on the stage
and there's going to be like a thong contest,
just everything that would make him horribly uncomfortable,
but it paid really well.
And we wanted to see whether he would agree
or go do it or not.
What'd he say?
He said, let's do it.
So then we had to start upping the ante.
He's like, oh yeah, well, you're going to have to MC
the thong and the banana hammock contest.
And he was like, no, I'm not.
We finally got him to the point where he said no.
I bet that got you guys good when he said,
yeah, sure, let's do it.
You're like, wait a minute,
you're not supposed to say that.
Yeah, has creeped out as he said he was
by homosexuality in general.
He just jumped on it right away.
He's like, hope paid for money.
Sure, let's do it.
Maybe it's what they say.
The ones that are like all freaked out about it
are the ones that are afraid they are or something.
I don't know.
Who knows?
I just thought that was funny.
This Pete pranks, I just happened on it by accident.
It was like just like an advertiser or something.
But this is like your gay cruise that's coming up
that they sent in the mail.
It's called Queue Ship, 2023 Cruise.
And it's like your inaugural booklet to the gay cruise.
You can send that to someone.
The oversized dildo mail prank, it comes in a tube
and it says, caution oversized dildo.
The porn addict recovery letter
from the Porn Attic Recovery Center of America.
I know some people I want to send that to.
How about everybody?
You got, you're going to be a father mailer.
That one's a good one.
Because it looks really official.
Erectile dysfunction support group mail prank mailer.
Foot hub of the month club.
Yeah, there are a ton of these things.
And then if you know some of this,
like a really big liberal,
you could send them the Trump thank you pack
for donating money.
And then the opposite, you know,
some of it's a big conservative.
You can have the Biden Harris thank you pack
for sending them money.
So anyhow, this Pete's pranks pretty cool.
And I saw it the other day
and I just thought I'd want to mention it.
I have nothing to do with it.
They don't pay anything.
I just thought it was really cool.
They have some really good ideas to really fuck with people.
Yeah.
And you know what, what do we do?
We fuck with people.
Yes. Yes.
I thought of some other good ones.
You could have the pedophile recovery group mailer.
Oh my God.
Oh.
Or do you like at one place
that they used to like put signs in the yards
and they got the wrong guy and he got killed.
Oh yeah.
Yeah. Some guy who's like molested went up and shot him
and is the wrong house.
They put it in, they read the address wrong.
Yeah.
See what any other good one.
That's quite a few years ago when that happened, but man.
Yeah. Yeah.
Send them a mailer.
How to deal with being on parole.
Yeah.
That's like the, the welcome home signs.
You go to the airport and hold up like welcome home mommy.
Third time for rehabs a charm.
Yeah.
Think sphincter rehab of America.
Yeah.
I remember seeing one sign, a guy who went to the.
No more pronies.
A guy who went to the airport to pick up his sister
and his sign said, I love you brother.
Even though you're a girl now.
And his sister had to walk up and was like, thanks.
I appreciate that.
Awesome.
We like the old Bud Light commercial.
Yeah.
There you go.
Are you Mr. Jenkins?
Yes, I am.
Because he had all the Bud Light in his car.
He's in there.
Where are you going Mr. Jenkins?
I just drive around.
He's like slamming all the Bud Light.
All right.
Oh shit.
What's that over there?
Oh no.
This island of horrible jokes.
My copy of Microsoft Office.
I will find you and I will have my word.
Oh.
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Oh my God, someone took a dump in the corner.
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