WEBVTT

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Welcome again. We're happy you chose us. Come

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on in. Wash yourself off. Would you enjoy a bourbon

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and coke? There's a liquor store down the road.

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If you go, I need rolling papers. Well, since

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you're here, let's get this daily douchebag pledge

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out of the way. All right, bitches, swing your

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hips and pelvic thrust. Shout it out with me.

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I, Joe or Jane Listener, promise to download

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every podcast. I, Joe or Jane Listener, promise

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to make... All friends, family members, and workmates

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download the show. I, Joe or Jane Listener, promise

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to grab idle computers, work computers, friends

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computers, community computers, and other assorted

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phones and listening devices and download the

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show from there. I, Joe or Jane Listener, will

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download the show and constantly barrage everyone

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with show name and platforms. I, Joe or Jane

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Listener, promise to wear a chicken costume and

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screen the show's name from my front yard. And

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finally, because of our 13 -year -old boy humor,

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you must go to Knobloch Cooter Licking in Uranus,

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Missouri to take selfies with the signs. If you

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go to Uranus, go to the fudge factory. Yes, there's

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a fudge factory in Uranus. No joke. Here at Two

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Douchebags and a Microphone, we don't stand behind

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our journalistic integrity. Go ahead and assume

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we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys. We can and will

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lie if it makes the story better. Two douchebags

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and a microphone. Hey, peeps, it's time for the

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police blotter. That's right. Stories about stupid

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criminals and the dumb assness that ensued. Let

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us begin now. A Florida man stole 7 ,000 in scratch

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-off tickets, then returned to the store to redeem

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them just hours later. A Florida man was hit

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with federal charges this week after he allegedly

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stole 7 ,000 in scratch -off lottery tickets

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from the convenience store. Justin Farley, 43,

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pulled into a St. Petersburg Circle K store on

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May 5th. He ran behind the counter. reached in

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the ticket window to grab the tickets before

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fleeing the scene in his gray Hyundai Elantra,

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according to a probable cause affidavit. Roughly

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40 minutes later, Farley arrived at the Circle

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K .A. store. He stole the tickets from, only

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to be refused. He then went to a close by 7 -Eleven

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to try to redeem the stretched yoffs and was

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refused as well. He went back to the Circle K

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store and robbed them of $120 from the till.

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He was promptly arrested minutes later and is

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in a cage awaiting trial. Hey there, slap nuts.

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It's time for the Creeps Music News. Hey, my

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little pumpkin seeds. This is Johnny Rohypnol

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with your music news. The Scream, Motley Crue,

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Union, and solo artist John Carabi has a new

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single and video debut. The title track to his

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new album coming out this spring. New Day will

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feature a full album with guest musicians Richard

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Fortis, Paul Taylor, and Charlie Starr. Producing

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Marty Fragmentson, who also worked with Aerosmith

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and Ozzy, will be the producer. Nicky needs to

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hire John back. He can actually still write a

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song. This is Johnny Rohypnol. That was your

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music news. And remember, bar chords are bullshit.

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Now, deep thoughts with Mark. Hmm, let's see.

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If I identify as a dog and I start wandering

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around the block without a collar on, could animal

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control come by and pick me up? Hmm, I may never

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know. Hey everybody, this is Uncle Rob. I'm going

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to give you some tips for life. Hello? This is

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Joshua Belmont, your food for thought man on

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The Hustle. Today, we need to focus on the genius

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Franklin Harris for inventing the jukebox override.

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Some dumbass puts down a hundred on the Melvins

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to last all night. No worry, thanks to Mr. Harris.

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Just put in a buck a song to override shitty

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music and you can be the hero. Mr. Harris, not

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many stop to admire your fine work, but we do

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here at Two Douchebags and a Microphone. Thank

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you, Mr. Harris, for being a patriotic, great

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human being. Miss Gulkenstein was tired of Mark

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and Toe for making sport of her. Little did the

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douchebags know, Miss Gulkenstein was a voodoo

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high priestess when she was younger. She grew

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angry and cast a spell on Rob, changing Rob into

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a capuchin monkey. Mark took Rob to a local zoo

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so he could be with the other monkeys. Here are

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the adventures of Rob, the capuchin monkey. Shh,

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be very quiet. We're going to listen in as Rob,

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the capuchin monkey, tries to sell the rest of

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the capuchin monkeys Amway. Rob has always dreamed

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of becoming a diamond status Amway as a capuchin

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monkey. Little did our hero Rob know. All the

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great apes owned stock in Sam's club and became

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violently pissed off when he tried to infringe

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on their territory. They promptly grabbed switches

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and beat his ass for three days straight. Rob

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could not sit down. Our constant pursuit for

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a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from

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an alien. Real hilarity. Two douchebags and microphone.

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I'm Mark here in the Kansas City area, in the

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very frigid Kansas City area. Right now it's

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probably about one degree. Going to hit maybe

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minus 10 tonight, and that would be a new record

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for this day or tomorrow or whatever it is. It's

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going to be a new record if we do hit minus 10,

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but there's a real possibility we might. So it's

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going to suck ass really bad, but at least we're

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inside doing this podcast. And I'm at the Talk

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is Cheap studio. I like to do goat noises. of

00:08:02.579 --> 00:08:05.839
the magnificent Lucas Oil Speedway and water

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track, and also home of Pecamo's Country Store,

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where you can find all your needs, including

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a selfie with the Sinclair Dinosaur in the duck

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blind studio. Whack, whack. And yes, we are about

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the same temperature as Mark. Let's get ready

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to ask if you guys are just as frigid. We are

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sitting from probably six to seven. of snow we

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got we probably got about six right here where

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i'm at yeah yeah i was about like saying yeah

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yeah you guys were supposed to get a lot more

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but i don't know what happened um i don't know

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i really have not been able to keep up with some

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of the meteorologists some of the meteorologists

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down there um They got a lot of shit for it.

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I can tell you that right now because I got a

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lot of them on my social media. They were calling

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for storm of the century. Oh my gosh. Yeah, we'll

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see about that. People are badgering the hell

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out of them. And then a lot of them I see going,

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yep, that's just like a man trying to say eight

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inches is 20 and all this stuff. And I'm like

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going, oh, my God. And I mean, people are just

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badgering the hell out of them. And I'm actually

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seeing some of them reply now. They used to just

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kind of ignore it. Now they're kind of like going,

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hey, how about if you go ahead and just unfollow

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me or, you know, or I'll do it for you, you know,

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and stuff like that. So, you know, I mean, I

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guess there's only so much bullshit you can take

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from people yelling at you, and then finally

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you're just like, you know what, fuck them. So,

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anyhow, I mean, you know, if they think you're

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that bad, they're not going to watch you anymore

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anyhow, so why not tell them to go fuck themselves.

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So, I've got a conclusion, Rob, okay? Now, you

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told me that Wheatland doesn't clear the road,

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so that makes it even worse, right? 300 some.

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We have no city workers. So it's all volunteers.

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Good old boys with their tractors and their trucks

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and, you know. I got it. Yeah, I've been in a

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small town. Other than people driving up the

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road, that's about it. Hmm. Yeah. The first person

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I seen this morning was on a three -wheeler.

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Oh, hell yeah. And he drove up, you could tell

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he drove up the corner, turned around and drove

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back. And this is like 9 o 'clock this morning.

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He's all bundled up like, you dumbass. I don't

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know, maybe he just went up to check, see how

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the roads were. He might have been. He might

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have just went up there and said, You could tell

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he was fucking cold as hell. It was fucking minus

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4 this morning, I think. It was horrible this

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morning when I went to work. Yeah, it's cold.

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Thank God for auto start. Do what? We've had

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frozen pipes and everything else. Luckily, we

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have not yet. Our house is like a, what did she

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say, 1917, I think this house was built. Oh,

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no wonder. Okay. Yeah, it's over 100 years old.

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Okay. Well, 1913, 1917, something like that.

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Back then they didn't bury the pipes that far

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down. So, and also they didn't insulate them.

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Plaster and no insulation in the walls. Yes,

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yep. Yeah, doesn't that suck? And a lot of it,

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I owned an old house before, one of them in Cleveland,

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Missouri. And, you know, the older the house,

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the insulation. A lot of times, the one in my

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old house when I had to tear out a wall is just

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shredded newspaper. That's their insulation.

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They used that a lot back then. Huh? I've seen

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that, yeah. Yeah. They've been doing remodeling

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for many years. Yeah, I've seen a lot. Yeah,

00:12:40.860 --> 00:12:43.340
when I tore the wall out there, I put blueboard

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in it, the Dow blueboard. But yeah, I couldn't

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believe it. I thought a mouse went in there and

00:12:48.820 --> 00:12:51.659
was like chewing up newspapers. And then my friend

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Bob, he's since passed away. He's kind of like

00:12:53.659 --> 00:12:56.659
a second father to me. And yeah, he goes, no,

00:12:56.779 --> 00:12:59.500
he goes, back then, that's what they did. And

00:12:59.500 --> 00:13:03.429
he also was... Yeah, he looked at the house and

00:13:03.429 --> 00:13:06.389
he goes, yeah, because we're doing some repairs

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and everything was different. You know, one by

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four or one by six or two by four. I go, why

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are they not uniform? He goes, oh, he goes, this

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is a sawmill special. I go, what's that? He goes,

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whatever the sawmill had is what they took. The

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closest one. And so if they had five one by sixes

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and two one by fours, they made it work. It's

00:13:31.700 --> 00:13:35.059
hell to repair, but they made it work. So I was

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like, I was sitting there going, what in the

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hell, man? Did these guys not know how to measure?

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He goes, no, no, no. He goes, that's sawmill

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special. He said, a lot of places out here, you

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got to understand, they couldn't afford to have

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wood trucked from, I don't know, the coast or

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something. So they had to get the wood that they

00:13:52.820 --> 00:13:55.039
had there, whether it's twisted, knotted, or

00:13:55.039 --> 00:13:59.769
different sizes. That's what they went by. So

00:13:59.769 --> 00:14:02.990
anyhow, any cold weather city should have an

00:14:02.990 --> 00:14:07.009
add -on driver's test. And this is dealing with

00:14:07.009 --> 00:14:08.929
people on the way to work and on the way back

00:14:08.929 --> 00:14:12.629
that don't know how to drive. And that's when

00:14:12.629 --> 00:14:16.690
a person that has his license has to take a secondary

00:14:16.690 --> 00:14:22.049
inclement weather test. Yes. Yes. Okay. I knew

00:14:22.049 --> 00:14:25.009
you would agree with it. Yes, I agree. Okay,

00:14:25.090 --> 00:14:28.470
so first you try them on a rain -slicking road,

00:14:28.590 --> 00:14:32.090
and then if they pass that, then they go to an

00:14:32.090 --> 00:14:37.129
ice and snow test. If the driver fails, he gets

00:14:37.129 --> 00:14:40.950
a no inclement weather checkmark, maybe like

00:14:40.950 --> 00:14:43.629
a red checkmark on the front of his license saying,

00:14:43.649 --> 00:14:47.990
this dipshit cannot go out during bad weather

00:14:47.990 --> 00:14:54.090
because he cannot drive. That would help real

00:14:54.090 --> 00:14:57.610
drivers, ones that know how to drive, that would

00:14:57.610 --> 00:15:00.830
help every one of them out so much. Because some

00:15:00.830 --> 00:15:03.690
dumbass couldn't be... And the problem I have

00:15:03.690 --> 00:15:05.230
up here, and it's probably the same everywhere,

00:15:05.269 --> 00:15:07.090
it's probably the same down there, is the guy

00:15:07.090 --> 00:15:08.909
in front of you is going 10 mile an hour, and

00:15:08.909 --> 00:15:11.450
the guy behind you is going 50. And it's like,

00:15:11.570 --> 00:15:14.950
can anyone just be fucking sane? You know, how

00:15:14.950 --> 00:15:16.769
about 30? How about, let's split the difference.

00:15:17.629 --> 00:15:21.899
Driving across 54, okay? Uh -huh. From here to

00:15:21.899 --> 00:15:26.620
Max Creek, it's 60 mile an hour. From Max Creek

00:15:26.620 --> 00:15:31.059
to Camden, it's 65. Okay. Well, if it's raining

00:15:31.059 --> 00:15:34.179
around, you get these people driving 45, 50.

00:15:34.740 --> 00:15:41.620
Oh, yeah. And it's like, you know, 6, 30, 7 o

00:15:41.620 --> 00:15:43.440
'clock in the morning, you're trying to get to

00:15:43.440 --> 00:15:47.700
work, and you're not having a problem, and you

00:15:47.700 --> 00:15:50.720
get behind these people doing... 10, 15 under

00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:54.580
the speed limit. Yeah, it's not right. It cuts

00:15:54.580 --> 00:16:00.259
back on your time. Trust me, Drive 54, there

00:16:00.259 --> 00:16:04.059
ain't many places to pass. No, I know that. Between

00:16:04.059 --> 00:16:06.919
here and Mass Creek, on the other side of Mass

00:16:06.919 --> 00:16:09.519
Creek, they were courteous enough to put in passing

00:16:09.519 --> 00:16:16.580
lanes. But yeah, between Mass Creek and Wheatland,

00:16:16.620 --> 00:16:20.980
it's all too late. Yeah, yeah, and there's not

00:16:20.980 --> 00:16:24.740
very many places to get around. Yeah, nowhere's

00:16:24.740 --> 00:16:26.720
safe to pass because all the hills are curves.

00:16:27.919 --> 00:16:33.000
So you're stuck doing 40, 45, and you've been

00:16:33.000 --> 00:16:35.399
on your feet on concrete for eight hours all

00:16:35.399 --> 00:16:39.720
day, not that I'm bitching. No, I got you. I

00:16:39.720 --> 00:16:42.159
got you. And if you were bitching, it would be

00:16:42.159 --> 00:16:52.570
fine with me, Rob. I get it. Okay, maybe. No,

00:16:57.269 --> 00:17:08.549
I have not, but that sounds like fun. Especially

00:17:08.549 --> 00:17:18.369
in Minnesota. Oh, all that, yeah. I read an upstate

00:17:18.369 --> 00:17:21.490
Minnesota bulletin that said there was an exploding

00:17:21.490 --> 00:17:26.109
tree advisory in effect. I'm not kidding you.

00:17:26.150 --> 00:17:28.750
You can look it up online. You can YouTube it

00:17:28.750 --> 00:17:31.589
or whatever. The tree actually cracks open, but

00:17:31.589 --> 00:17:35.109
it sounds like an explosion. And the official

00:17:35.109 --> 00:17:37.970
explanation is water gets caught inside the tree

00:17:37.970 --> 00:17:41.089
and expands before the water can drain out of

00:17:41.089 --> 00:17:45.069
the tree. It's very similar to flash freezes

00:17:45.069 --> 00:17:48.450
around here. Okay, okay. Yeah, it's like the

00:17:48.450 --> 00:17:51.690
ice storms we had. You hear the trees crackling

00:17:51.690 --> 00:17:55.130
and shit. Yes. Yeah, and it sounds like an explosion.

00:17:55.289 --> 00:17:59.490
Yes. It happens down here, but not nearly as

00:17:59.490 --> 00:18:02.720
often. but yeah like an ice storm ice will get

00:18:02.720 --> 00:18:05.819
in there and you'll hear it go and it sounds

00:18:05.819 --> 00:18:10.140
like an explosion yes um so they said this is

00:18:10.140 --> 00:18:12.420
caused by pockets of moisture in the ground and

00:18:12.420 --> 00:18:15.559
this is frost quakes frost quakes do the same

00:18:15.559 --> 00:18:18.380
thing they sound like little explosions but uh

00:18:18.380 --> 00:18:20.720
and it's caused by the same thing and this is

00:18:20.720 --> 00:18:23.920
in the ground okay uh so like this happens in

00:18:23.920 --> 00:18:27.559
fields It happens up in northern Missouri a lot

00:18:27.559 --> 00:18:29.640
more than it does down here or where you're at.

00:18:29.799 --> 00:18:32.440
But this is caused by pockets of moisture in

00:18:32.440 --> 00:18:35.200
the ground that expands at a rapid rate and causes

00:18:35.200 --> 00:18:38.599
the earth to push up and make a loud sound similar

00:18:38.599 --> 00:18:42.740
to an explosion. So, I mean, you know, that's

00:18:42.740 --> 00:18:45.440
one thing we've got going for us, Rob. We don't

00:18:45.440 --> 00:18:48.240
normally have exploding trees or frost quakes,

00:18:48.279 --> 00:18:52.509
right? Right. Yeah. Unless we have ice storms,

00:18:52.529 --> 00:18:54.970
then we're here. Yeah, and then we'll crackling.

00:18:55.410 --> 00:18:58.289
I'll tell you what. I've watched them explode

00:18:58.289 --> 00:19:00.670
then. Oh, I've been sitting in my house with

00:19:00.670 --> 00:19:03.369
no power during a bad ice storm like in the early

00:19:03.369 --> 00:19:07.109
2000s and just listening to the crackling and

00:19:07.109 --> 00:19:09.410
trying to gauge if it's going to come through

00:19:09.410 --> 00:19:11.829
my fucking living room window or not. Right.

00:19:12.190 --> 00:19:14.210
Oh, man, yeah, I'm sitting there. And you have

00:19:14.210 --> 00:19:17.210
nothing else to do. You know, it's cold outside.

00:19:17.789 --> 00:19:20.029
You can't, like, go work in the yard or just

00:19:20.029 --> 00:19:21.910
go, you know, sit on the porch or something.

00:19:22.369 --> 00:19:25.230
And all the power's off, and all you can hear

00:19:25.230 --> 00:19:28.230
is all your trees breaking in half. Not a lot

00:19:28.230 --> 00:19:32.630
of fun. Yeah. So it's been so cold that Walmart

00:19:32.630 --> 00:19:36.710
issued an alert, Rob. It's encouraging its customers

00:19:36.710 --> 00:19:39.190
to double -layer their pajama bottoms before

00:19:39.190 --> 00:19:43.779
leaving the house. that's good that's nice of

00:19:43.779 --> 00:19:47.000
him wasn't it yeah thanks wally thanks wally

00:19:47.000 --> 00:19:51.380
world very nice very nice so um all right speaking

00:19:51.380 --> 00:19:55.900
of places i hate to shop at lowe's is at it again

00:19:55.900 --> 00:19:59.539
okay uh you know i'm always after walmart and

00:19:59.539 --> 00:20:02.119
then the second one i'm after is lowe's everybody's

00:20:02.119 --> 00:20:06.740
after walmart And then Lowe's. In my opinion,

00:20:06.759 --> 00:20:09.079
the two worst fucking retailers in the world

00:20:09.079 --> 00:20:13.180
for customer service and just generally everything.

00:20:13.420 --> 00:20:16.359
The attitude of the store, the employees, all

00:20:16.359 --> 00:20:19.460
of this. So I was forced to go there because

00:20:19.460 --> 00:20:22.640
it was too close to closing time. And it was

00:20:22.640 --> 00:20:26.869
the only place I could go. because in time so

00:20:26.869 --> 00:20:30.390
i'm buying a large piece of form -fitting weatherstrip

00:20:30.390 --> 00:20:32.809
i had to get it on that night because it was

00:20:32.809 --> 00:20:34.809
a night it was getting really really cold right

00:20:34.809 --> 00:20:40.619
and the back door yeah i was yeah i think everybody

00:20:40.619 --> 00:20:42.779
was there are a lot of people at lowes buying

00:20:42.779 --> 00:20:44.660
weather stripping and shit like that i could

00:20:44.660 --> 00:20:47.019
tell you that right now everybody had the same

00:20:47.019 --> 00:20:50.319
gazelle running from a fucking lion look on their

00:20:50.319 --> 00:20:52.779
face like oh shit it's here it's here it's here

00:20:52.779 --> 00:20:58.049
it's here So, anyhow, I'm buying this large piece

00:20:58.049 --> 00:21:00.210
of form -fitting weatherstripping for our back

00:21:00.210 --> 00:21:02.950
door. I go to the self -checkout because that's

00:21:02.950 --> 00:21:06.390
all they have now. And one guy's standing there

00:21:06.390 --> 00:21:09.309
looking. There's four self -checkouts and one

00:21:09.309 --> 00:21:12.029
guy's standing there looking at everybody, right?

00:21:12.410 --> 00:21:14.349
So, he's supposed to be helping, but he's just

00:21:14.349 --> 00:21:17.869
standing there looking, all right? So, I try

00:21:17.869 --> 00:21:20.690
to scan. I love those people. Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:21:20.849 --> 00:21:23.250
And then you try to get them to do something.

00:21:23.799 --> 00:21:26.640
And they give you this look like, why are you

00:21:26.640 --> 00:21:29.539
bothering me? Yeah, I'm just supposed to stand

00:21:29.539 --> 00:21:32.119
here. Yeah, yeah. It's like, well, number one,

00:21:32.160 --> 00:21:33.680
you're just standing there. Number two, you do

00:21:33.680 --> 00:21:37.660
work here. Number three, you have nothing fucking

00:21:37.660 --> 00:21:39.819
else to do. So why don't you just come over and

00:21:39.819 --> 00:21:41.640
help me? Maybe the time will go by a little bit

00:21:41.640 --> 00:21:47.200
quicker. So anyhow, I tried to scan the weather

00:21:47.200 --> 00:21:49.539
stripping, but it wouldn't scan. It was rubbed

00:21:49.539 --> 00:21:52.339
off just a little too much, okay? So I called

00:21:52.339 --> 00:21:55.079
the standing guy over, and I tell him about my

00:21:55.079 --> 00:21:57.920
issue. He says you need to go back to where you

00:21:57.920 --> 00:22:01.240
got it and find a working barcode. He told me

00:22:01.240 --> 00:22:04.039
I had to, right? I'm like sitting here thinking,

00:22:04.220 --> 00:22:08.079
you motherfucker. You're standing there with

00:22:08.079 --> 00:22:10.660
your thumb up your ass, and you're telling me

00:22:10.660 --> 00:22:14.900
to go get another one. So, I told him I was not

00:22:14.900 --> 00:22:17.039
going to go back to find another, hoping he would

00:22:17.039 --> 00:22:21.000
have someone go grab one for me, so I didn't

00:22:21.000 --> 00:22:23.839
have to cancel my order and come back. He instead

00:22:23.839 --> 00:22:26.799
calls a guy over to run it back to its area,

00:22:27.019 --> 00:22:30.940
okay? He, instead of saying, find this gentleman,

00:22:31.140 --> 00:22:34.480
one with a barcode that works, he said, here,

00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:37.900
run this back, he doesn't want it. When he knew

00:22:37.900 --> 00:22:40.740
the issue, he knew that the barcode was not working,

00:22:40.839 --> 00:22:45.569
right? So, wouldn't you, Just out of common sense,

00:22:45.890 --> 00:22:48.650
go, sir, how about if I have this gentleman go

00:22:48.650 --> 00:22:51.910
run and get one for you that has a working barcode,

00:22:51.990 --> 00:22:54.049
right? Isn't that normally what they should do,

00:22:54.089 --> 00:22:58.230
right? That's what most places normally do. Well,

00:22:58.250 --> 00:23:01.049
this idiot didn't think of that or didn't care.

00:23:01.789 --> 00:23:04.549
So I looked at my ass. I said, couldn't you just,

00:23:04.710 --> 00:23:08.630
you know, had him go fucking get me one, grab

00:23:08.630 --> 00:23:11.289
me another piece instead? He said, we don't have

00:23:11.289 --> 00:23:13.390
time to do that. That's what he told me, Rob.

00:23:13.529 --> 00:23:16.250
He said, we don't have time to do that. So I'm

00:23:16.250 --> 00:23:18.829
like, all right, okay. You're there eight fucking

00:23:18.829 --> 00:23:23.309
hours. What are you doing? Yeah, so I'm checking

00:23:23.309 --> 00:23:26.250
out with my caulking gun, and the guy that took

00:23:26.250 --> 00:23:29.190
back the weather stripping, he showed up to self

00:23:29.190 --> 00:23:32.529
-checkout area before I checked out, right? And

00:23:32.529 --> 00:23:34.890
I looked at the guy, and I asked him, I said,

00:23:34.950 --> 00:23:37.410
hey, I go, do you think you're doing a good job

00:23:37.410 --> 00:23:41.559
or not? And he responded, yes, I think I'm doing

00:23:41.559 --> 00:23:43.940
a good job. I look at him, I say, well, you know,

00:23:43.960 --> 00:23:47.160
as you can plainly see, the man you had run back

00:23:47.160 --> 00:23:50.759
my item is already back. He looks at me funny.

00:23:50.819 --> 00:23:53.980
I go, do you get where I'm going with this? And

00:23:53.980 --> 00:23:56.960
I don't think he did. And I just told him, I

00:23:56.960 --> 00:23:59.660
said, you know, I said, I said, I wish you well.

00:24:01.039 --> 00:24:03.500
And I walked off. I was just like, you know,

00:24:03.519 --> 00:24:06.200
and if he's smart, which he was, and he'd get

00:24:06.200 --> 00:24:11.779
it. I'm pretty much, I'm pretty much told. Yes.

00:24:15.339 --> 00:24:17.759
Yeah. And when I told him, I said, I wish you

00:24:17.759 --> 00:24:19.740
well, I was hoping he would catch what I was

00:24:19.740 --> 00:24:21.880
saying. What I was saying is you're too fucking

00:24:21.880 --> 00:24:25.900
stupid to live. I wish you well. That's what

00:24:25.900 --> 00:24:29.500
I meant. Allegedly. And I should have just told

00:24:29.500 --> 00:24:31.779
him that I said, you know what? Look both ways

00:24:31.779 --> 00:24:33.640
before you do anything. Cause you're too fucking

00:24:33.640 --> 00:24:38.160
stupid to live. The end. And I'm a compassionate

00:24:38.160 --> 00:24:41.519
human being. So I don't necessarily want you

00:24:41.519 --> 00:24:49.740
to die. So please. Be careful. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

00:24:49.779 --> 00:24:54.839
yeah. Yep. Yeah. So anyhow, if I would, you know.

00:24:55.450 --> 00:24:58.130
I was pissed off because I didn't necessarily

00:24:58.130 --> 00:25:00.170
go in for that cocking gun. And what I should

00:25:00.170 --> 00:25:02.809
have done is I should have just looked. I should

00:25:02.809 --> 00:25:05.589
have took and bought it, went all the way up

00:25:05.589 --> 00:25:07.769
to the credit card information, and then just

00:25:07.769 --> 00:25:10.789
sat it down and left. That's what I should have

00:25:10.789 --> 00:25:15.809
done, but I didn't. So anyhow, all right. Rob,

00:25:15.950 --> 00:25:18.269
are the schools down there being canceled due

00:25:18.269 --> 00:25:21.559
to the Arctic blast, or do you know? Yes. Okay.

00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:25.160
Okay. All schools up here are closed, not just

00:25:25.160 --> 00:25:27.940
because of snow, but mostly because of the frigid

00:25:27.940 --> 00:25:32.859
temperatures. You know, there could be no snow

00:25:32.859 --> 00:25:34.720
on the ground, but it wouldn't matter. The official

00:25:34.720 --> 00:25:37.480
word is the administration of the schools does

00:25:37.480 --> 00:25:39.720
not want a kid to have to wait at the bus stop

00:25:39.720 --> 00:25:45.359
in the extreme cold. So, Rob. Okay, no, we get

00:25:45.359 --> 00:25:48.779
that. Yeah, yeah. We also have a lot of rules.

00:25:52.149 --> 00:25:56.150
kids out there out there i see it yeah up here

00:25:56.150 --> 00:26:00.630
i don't but but i mean how many times have you

00:26:00.630 --> 00:26:02.609
weighed out in sub -zero temperature just to

00:26:02.609 --> 00:26:07.509
go to school at the bus stop every day including

00:26:07.509 --> 00:26:13.829
may yeah yes yeah yeah so um anyhow i don't like

00:26:13.829 --> 00:26:19.960
anyway yeah yeah Yeah, we did it a lot, a lot

00:26:19.960 --> 00:26:22.640
of times, a lot of times. I remember when the

00:26:22.640 --> 00:26:24.779
school bus used to slip and slide all over those

00:26:24.779 --> 00:26:27.960
gravel roads because there was ice on them. And

00:26:27.960 --> 00:26:30.220
our bus driver would just look up and go, hold

00:26:30.220 --> 00:26:36.599
on. We'd be all fucking holding on, white knuckling

00:26:36.599 --> 00:26:41.259
it. It was funny. Yep, no. All right, have you

00:26:41.259 --> 00:26:52.630
heard about Kiefer Sutherland's arrest? Yeah,

00:26:52.730 --> 00:26:55.309
I just heard a little blurb of it. Go ahead.

00:26:55.549 --> 00:26:58.430
I think I read stuff about it a couple days ago.

00:26:58.569 --> 00:27:01.750
Well, I actually investigated a little bit because

00:27:01.750 --> 00:27:03.849
I heard little blurbs of it like you did too,

00:27:03.950 --> 00:27:07.369
but it wasn't like really crazy publicized. ABC

00:27:07.369 --> 00:27:10.529
News reported Sunday, while citing law enforcement

00:27:10.529 --> 00:27:14.009
sources, that Sutherland allegedly punched an

00:27:14.009 --> 00:27:16.569
Uber driver multiple times and tried to choke

00:27:16.569 --> 00:27:20.069
him, per the allegations from the driver. Okay,

00:27:20.109 --> 00:27:24.970
yeah, yeah. Okay. All right. Law enforcement

00:27:24.970 --> 00:27:28.509
sources told ABC News that the Uber driver told

00:27:28.509 --> 00:27:30.930
police that he got out of the vehicle to get

00:27:30.930 --> 00:27:33.569
away from the actor and that it appeared that

00:27:33.569 --> 00:27:36.529
Sutherland was under the influence during the

00:27:36.529 --> 00:27:40.849
incident. The Uber driver called 911 while allegedly

00:27:40.849 --> 00:27:44.089
fleeing the actor, the sources told ABC News.

00:27:44.230 --> 00:27:47.109
The sources also said that the driver had a dash

00:27:47.109 --> 00:27:49.750
camera in his car that may have captured part

00:27:49.750 --> 00:27:53.150
of the alleged altercation. So last week, the

00:27:53.150 --> 00:27:55.329
Los Angeles Police Department said they determined

00:27:55.329 --> 00:27:58.690
that the 59 -year -old Sutherland entered a ride

00:27:58.690 --> 00:28:03.730
hail vehicle. I guess that's like Uber or something,

00:28:03.829 --> 00:28:07.190
ride hail. physically assaulted the driver and

00:28:07.190 --> 00:28:09.910
made criminal threats towards the victim Sutherland

00:28:09.910 --> 00:28:13.210
was arrested on suspicion of felony criminal

00:28:13.210 --> 00:28:16.569
threats and was released after posting a $50

00:28:16.569 --> 00:28:20.509
,000 bond no injuries requiring medical treatment

00:28:20.509 --> 00:28:25.029
were reported the actor's first court appearance

00:28:25.029 --> 00:28:28.690
is scheduled for February 2nd according to jail

00:28:28.690 --> 00:28:34.529
records he has not been charged yet so Yeah.

00:28:35.390 --> 00:28:37.630
I thought that was pretty interesting because

00:28:37.630 --> 00:28:41.250
he's never really been in trouble, has he? Not

00:28:41.250 --> 00:28:43.109
that I know of. I've never heard of him being

00:28:43.109 --> 00:28:45.869
in trouble. He's always been kind of like a model

00:28:45.869 --> 00:28:50.049
citizen pretty much, right? I mean, he's had

00:28:50.049 --> 00:28:55.009
his moments. Has he? I can't remember. He hasn't

00:28:55.009 --> 00:28:58.970
been as bad as his dad. Oh, Donald Sutherland?

00:28:59.029 --> 00:29:06.849
Yeah, that's true. True. For the biggest part,

00:29:06.990 --> 00:29:10.950
he's been a good guy. Okay. Yeah, but I think

00:29:10.950 --> 00:29:14.910
there has been a couple GWIs involved. You know

00:29:14.910 --> 00:29:18.670
what? Now that you said that, I think you're

00:29:18.670 --> 00:29:20.529
right, Rob. I think you're right. I think you're

00:29:20.529 --> 00:29:24.329
right. It's low -key. He's not a major troublemaker

00:29:24.329 --> 00:29:30.009
like Gary Busey. Gary Busey's entertaining, though.

00:29:33.230 --> 00:29:39.730
yeah butter and sausage keeper has he's had his

00:29:39.730 --> 00:29:44.109
troubles just like everybody else uh -huh but

00:29:44.109 --> 00:29:48.490
he's overcome them yeah yeah yeah and i know

00:29:48.490 --> 00:29:51.869
where other people have not so yeah no no no

00:29:51.869 --> 00:29:54.349
and he'd been a model citizen for a while i guess

00:29:54.349 --> 00:29:57.769
maybe relapsed or whatever i don't know but this

00:29:57.769 --> 00:30:01.480
just proves my theory rob you give anyone Even

00:30:01.480 --> 00:30:04.339
the Dalai Lama, enough human interactions, and

00:30:04.339 --> 00:30:07.839
he will eventually succumb to violence. People

00:30:07.839 --> 00:30:10.619
demand violence through ridiculous, obnoxious

00:30:10.619 --> 00:30:15.700
behavior. And it's true. You know, I want to

00:30:15.700 --> 00:30:19.400
see the full police report before Kiefer hasn't

00:30:19.400 --> 00:30:21.420
been an issue in a long time, and especially

00:30:21.420 --> 00:30:24.779
the violence that I could find in his 60 years

00:30:24.779 --> 00:30:27.380
on this earth or close to. Yeah, there's been

00:30:27.380 --> 00:30:33.319
no violence. Yeah. So, anyhow, there was a Florida

00:30:33.319 --> 00:30:36.940
deputy that captured a runaway emu and safely

00:30:36.940 --> 00:30:39.940
returned it home. Word is the policeman had a

00:30:39.940 --> 00:30:43.059
rough time getting out of the emu's owner's home.

00:30:43.460 --> 00:30:46.059
The tenant kept trying to sell him car insurance.

00:30:46.539 --> 00:30:49.740
I think his name was Doug. You got it. You got

00:30:49.740 --> 00:30:52.500
it. Guys get it. Guys get it. Women will not.

00:30:52.579 --> 00:30:55.319
Yeah. His name was Doug and he kept trying to

00:30:55.319 --> 00:31:00.690
sell him car insurance. So, all right. So while

00:31:00.690 --> 00:31:02.509
we're talking Florida, a man in Florida has been

00:31:02.509 --> 00:31:05.869
arrested after he posted as he posed as an NBA

00:31:05.869 --> 00:31:10.650
assistant to steal jewelry and swallowing $769

00:31:10.650 --> 00:31:19.309
,000 earrings. I don't know how. Yeah, I don't

00:31:19.309 --> 00:31:22.170
know how this happened. It doesn't. The article

00:31:22.170 --> 00:31:24.529
didn't explain it all. But what it said was a

00:31:24.529 --> 00:31:28.410
man in Florida. he posed as an NBA assistant

00:31:28.410 --> 00:31:33.750
to steal jewelry, and he swallowed a $769 ,000

00:31:33.750 --> 00:31:39.089
pair of earrings. So did he act like maybe one

00:31:39.089 --> 00:31:42.390
of the NBA star's assistants, maybe? And said,

00:31:42.430 --> 00:31:44.490
yeah, I'm coming to get his earrings, and then

00:31:44.490 --> 00:31:46.690
they found out it wasn't the assistant that he

00:31:46.690 --> 00:31:48.910
was supposed to be, and he swallowed them, thinking

00:31:48.910 --> 00:31:52.250
he was going to keep them, I guess? I don't know.

00:31:52.309 --> 00:31:53.990
I've got to look more on that, but I thought

00:31:53.990 --> 00:31:58.259
I'd run that by you. Yeah, someone had to be

00:31:58.259 --> 00:32:03.539
on ship patrol. Ship patrol, or old boys going

00:32:03.539 --> 00:32:06.880
up in the yard because they lodged inside somewhere.

00:32:07.759 --> 00:32:11.220
That could be. That could be. Yeah. I mean, their

00:32:11.220 --> 00:32:14.039
earrings, they got a point. You know, they put

00:32:14.039 --> 00:32:18.539
sticky news somewhere that long. Not a very smart

00:32:18.539 --> 00:32:22.269
move, dude. No. No, not at all. Not a very smart

00:32:22.269 --> 00:32:25.690
move at all. Well, you know, he's in a cage now.

00:32:26.549 --> 00:32:32.470
Yeah, and I would bet that posing as an NBA assistant,

00:32:32.710 --> 00:32:37.569
he's either someone that helps the NBA players,

00:32:37.630 --> 00:32:39.569
like, I don't know, retrieves their sneakers

00:32:39.569 --> 00:32:42.190
or what, you know what I mean? Yeah. Or he was

00:32:42.190 --> 00:32:44.910
assigned to a couple of them personally, you

00:32:44.910 --> 00:32:47.519
know, like they hired him. And he's like, hey,

00:32:47.599 --> 00:32:52.700
I'm Bill, and I am the assistant for whoever,

00:32:53.079 --> 00:32:57.200
number 72 over there, whatever. And yeah, I'm

00:32:57.200 --> 00:32:59.579
here to get his earrings. Something like that

00:32:59.579 --> 00:33:02.200
happened. Very interesting. There's going to

00:33:02.200 --> 00:33:04.660
be more to the story coming out, and I'll probably

00:33:04.660 --> 00:33:06.720
cover it some more, but that's all I know right

00:33:06.720 --> 00:33:10.180
now. So this is a cool story, Rob. All right.

00:33:11.400 --> 00:33:13.480
Drivers in Maryland slammed on their brakes.

00:33:13.839 --> 00:33:16.140
pulled over to the side of the freeway, and brave

00:33:16.140 --> 00:33:18.880
drivers going 80 miles an hour to retrieve what

00:33:18.880 --> 00:33:21.460
appeared to be a ton of loot that accidentally

00:33:21.460 --> 00:33:24.160
spilled on the roadway. So, you know, like the

00:33:24.160 --> 00:33:29.700
good old scenario, like a Brinks truck, you know,

00:33:29.700 --> 00:33:32.240
jackknives, and then there's all this cash flying

00:33:32.240 --> 00:33:33.900
everywhere and people are out there grabbing

00:33:33.900 --> 00:33:37.059
it, right? Well, the would -be money snatchers

00:33:37.059 --> 00:33:39.200
were highly surprised to find out it was all

00:33:39.200 --> 00:33:43.210
fake money. And it had on it... It looked just

00:33:43.210 --> 00:33:45.690
like real money, but it had a picture of it.

00:33:45.730 --> 00:33:49.349
It said, for entertainment purposes only. Oh,

00:33:49.369 --> 00:33:52.250
yeah. Yeah. It was entertaining watching those

00:33:52.250 --> 00:33:54.069
bozos run around thinking they're getting real

00:33:54.069 --> 00:33:57.450
money. It was for entertainment purposes only.

00:33:58.529 --> 00:34:00.950
If you get a chance, look it up. It's funny.

00:34:01.230 --> 00:34:02.950
People are out there fucking grabbing everything.

00:34:03.470 --> 00:34:05.230
I mean, that's like one of those things that

00:34:05.230 --> 00:34:07.069
you watch on YouTube and you go, yeah, I want

00:34:07.069 --> 00:34:10.150
to watch that again. And then you get up and

00:34:10.150 --> 00:34:11.710
go, well, I got to get something. No, I'm going

00:34:11.710 --> 00:34:16.360
to watch it again. This is pretty cool. So, let's

00:34:16.360 --> 00:34:19.840
see. How about from Florida to just to the north

00:34:19.840 --> 00:34:22.519
neighbor, Georgia, and a woman that was found

00:34:22.519 --> 00:34:26.139
in a neighbor's pond naked screaming that she

00:34:26.139 --> 00:34:30.760
was a mermaid? So, you know, meth can get pretty

00:34:30.760 --> 00:34:34.679
fucking ugly, right, Rob? Oh, yeah. Yeah, she

00:34:34.679 --> 00:34:37.880
was naked in a neighbor's pond screaming she's

00:34:37.880 --> 00:34:44.380
a mermaid. Pretty good, right? Oh, yeah, yeah,

00:34:44.380 --> 00:34:47.579
yeah. Or bath salts, even. You know, I mean,

00:34:47.599 --> 00:34:49.420
I want to know if she tried to bite someone's

00:34:49.420 --> 00:34:51.239
face off. If she tried to bite someone's face

00:34:51.239 --> 00:34:53.159
off, then it was definitely bath salts, right?

00:34:53.460 --> 00:34:57.340
Yeah, definitely. Yeah, yeah. Or took a kid in,

00:34:57.360 --> 00:35:01.500
yeah. Yep. The other day, I was driving by a

00:35:01.500 --> 00:35:04.199
cemetery at night when I noticed someone left

00:35:04.199 --> 00:35:07.269
the gates open. I stopped quickly, and I shut

00:35:07.269 --> 00:35:09.809
and locked it. I get a call the next day. It

00:35:09.809 --> 00:35:12.250
was the DNC accusing me of election interference.

00:35:16.269 --> 00:35:18.409
All you Democrats out there, don't get mad at

00:35:18.409 --> 00:35:22.309
me. It's just a fucking joke, okay? And I'm sure...

00:35:22.309 --> 00:35:31.190
Yes, it did. Actually, I think I wrote it. I

00:35:31.190 --> 00:35:32.849
don't know. Fuck, I probably stole it. I don't

00:35:32.849 --> 00:35:38.210
know. Okay. yep all right okay that was about

00:35:38.210 --> 00:35:43.250
a 30 second one right there yeah yep um and and

00:35:43.250 --> 00:35:48.590
also uh you know uh you know what i'm i'm just

00:35:48.590 --> 00:35:50.570
gonna skip that one because that's gonna open

00:35:50.570 --> 00:35:53.010
up a whole ball of shit that we don't need right

00:35:53.010 --> 00:35:58.929
now um okay All right. Do you remember in the

00:35:58.929 --> 00:36:02.250
early 80s, the United States made a half -hearted

00:36:02.250 --> 00:36:05.050
effort to join the rest of the world in using

00:36:05.050 --> 00:36:09.150
the metric system? Yeah. Okay. Well, you know

00:36:09.150 --> 00:36:12.269
how the story ends, right? It never did happen.

00:36:12.510 --> 00:36:15.730
We're still on... Yeah, we went back to... Yeah,

00:36:15.929 --> 00:36:18.730
yeah. We went back to the regular standard measurements.

00:36:19.050 --> 00:36:23.719
No, no... metric here so um but one highway between

00:36:23.719 --> 00:36:27.820
tucson arizona and negolis new mexico is hanging

00:36:27.820 --> 00:36:31.960
on interstate 19 still deploy it uh still deploy

00:36:31.960 --> 00:36:35.940
uh displays mile markers and distances and kilometers

00:36:35.940 --> 00:36:39.300
central oregon daily news reported it's just

00:36:39.300 --> 00:36:42.420
kind of a cool little quirky fact about us said

00:36:42.420 --> 00:36:47.659
alejandro aguiar who lives in tubac arizona Now,

00:36:47.699 --> 00:36:50.500
the U .S. Department of Transportation has declared

00:36:50.500 --> 00:36:52.739
that when you're driving in the United States,

00:36:52.840 --> 00:36:55.780
it should be unmistakably American. As a result,

00:36:55.840 --> 00:36:58.420
that stretch of interstate may get new signage,

00:36:58.440 --> 00:37:01.280
although the Arizona Department of Transportation

00:37:01.280 --> 00:37:04.880
has not received direction from the feds. Now,

00:37:04.920 --> 00:37:07.679
here's what I got to say right here, okay? Now,

00:37:07.679 --> 00:37:10.019
Rob, the reason I brought this up is because

00:37:10.019 --> 00:37:13.369
this... this can be the question of the week

00:37:13.369 --> 00:37:16.070
i don't think i have one yet i might insert one

00:37:16.070 --> 00:37:18.449
but this could be the question of the week all

00:37:18.449 --> 00:37:20.989
right now let's say you're driving down this

00:37:20.989 --> 00:37:23.489
highway right and you don't know what kilometers

00:37:23.489 --> 00:37:27.170
is right okay so you don't know what the speed

00:37:27.170 --> 00:37:31.409
is okay can you legitimately get out of a speeding

00:37:31.409 --> 00:37:35.329
ticket because it's in kilometers and all you

00:37:35.329 --> 00:37:42.300
know is standard I think... Okay. Okay. Go ahead.

00:37:42.980 --> 00:37:47.280
Here's my point of view. Okay. I think technically

00:37:47.280 --> 00:37:54.320
you could, but at the same time, most speedometers

00:37:54.320 --> 00:37:57.860
anymore come with kilometers along with mile

00:37:57.860 --> 00:38:03.159
per hour. Mm -hmm. So, yeah, I think they could

00:38:03.159 --> 00:38:06.500
get you if they really tried. You know, I...

00:38:06.500 --> 00:38:12.210
Yeah, you know what... Am I vilified? With today's

00:38:12.210 --> 00:38:17.590
technology on our speedometers, hell, back in

00:38:17.590 --> 00:38:23.130
the 90s, early 2000s, you'd be running so many

00:38:23.130 --> 00:38:26.829
miles an hour, it would tell you how many kilometers

00:38:26.829 --> 00:38:31.070
per hour. Yeah, that's true. That's true. So

00:38:31.070 --> 00:38:34.969
I think it might be a little hard to get out

00:38:34.969 --> 00:38:37.329
of. I really do. No, no, no, no. Unless your

00:38:37.329 --> 00:38:40.239
vehicle is not equipped with that. No, that's

00:38:40.239 --> 00:38:43.659
why I asked you, Rob. Okay, that's exactly what

00:38:43.659 --> 00:38:46.960
I thought, too. But here's the other thing I

00:38:46.960 --> 00:38:49.800
was thinking. All right, if someone does not

00:38:49.800 --> 00:38:52.300
have that equipment, okay, they could get out

00:38:52.300 --> 00:38:55.219
of it. But the problem is, like anything, you

00:38:55.219 --> 00:38:56.980
can get out of it, but it's going to cost you

00:38:56.980 --> 00:38:59.519
more money to get out of it than to just pay

00:38:59.519 --> 00:39:03.340
the fucking thing. Right. You see, and that's

00:39:03.340 --> 00:39:05.360
where they got you is. It's like, yeah, yeah,

00:39:05.360 --> 00:39:07.300
sure. Yeah, it's just a speeding ticket. Yeah,

00:39:07.320 --> 00:39:09.719
yeah. Yeah, it's like, sure, go ahead, get you

00:39:09.719 --> 00:39:12.099
a lawyer. It's going to cost you five times more.

00:39:12.280 --> 00:39:14.099
You might as well just scratch us off that fucking

00:39:14.099 --> 00:39:17.519
check right now, buddy. And most people do because

00:39:17.519 --> 00:39:20.559
they can't afford to hire a lawyer for five times

00:39:20.559 --> 00:39:22.639
the amount just to get out of a fucking ticket.

00:39:23.059 --> 00:39:27.860
So... Yeah, and... Yeah, because lawyers are

00:39:27.860 --> 00:39:31.860
very expensive these days. Yeah. Yep, yep. No,

00:39:31.860 --> 00:39:38.800
they are. Yep. All right. Oh, and speaking of

00:39:38.800 --> 00:39:41.380
lawyers and attorneys, I had to get after some

00:39:41.380 --> 00:39:46.019
idiots that tried to use our name. Really? Mm

00:39:46.019 --> 00:39:51.079
-hmm. Yep. It started by these people trying

00:39:51.079 --> 00:39:54.480
to get me to buy their service. And they're like,

00:39:54.539 --> 00:39:57.099
well, we can catch people trying to use your

00:39:57.099 --> 00:40:02.420
trademark. And I'm like, okay. All right. So,

00:40:02.420 --> 00:40:04.329
and then what? You know, what do you do? You

00:40:04.329 --> 00:40:06.050
tell them to stop? No, we just let you know.

00:40:06.130 --> 00:40:08.289
Like, that's okay. I said, that's all right.

00:40:08.429 --> 00:40:10.789
If they're trying to really do something with

00:40:10.789 --> 00:40:13.550
it, I'll find out, you know, because it's trademarked.

00:40:14.110 --> 00:40:19.929
You know, and so then this other firm sends me

00:40:19.929 --> 00:40:23.269
a message wanting me saying, hey, your trademark's

00:40:23.269 --> 00:40:26.809
been abandoned. I'm like, no, it hasn't. Nope,

00:40:26.909 --> 00:40:30.539
got the stuff right here. It's mine. And these

00:40:30.539 --> 00:40:32.460
people are trying to use it and they're going

00:40:32.460 --> 00:40:34.980
to have it if you don't. And if you don't, you

00:40:34.980 --> 00:40:37.000
know, something like I got to send them some

00:40:37.000 --> 00:40:38.820
money and they're going to like file it and all

00:40:38.820 --> 00:40:42.900
this shit. And I'm like, no, no, let them go

00:40:42.900 --> 00:40:45.760
ahead and try it. It's fine. And so I ended up

00:40:45.760 --> 00:40:47.500
just like fucking telling the guy, you know,

00:40:47.500 --> 00:40:51.199
and he's. texting me right and trying to tell

00:40:51.199 --> 00:40:53.840
me yeah you need to you need to have us uh go

00:40:53.840 --> 00:40:55.739
ahead and file this otherwise these guys are

00:40:55.739 --> 00:40:57.860
going to get your name and i said number one

00:40:57.860 --> 00:41:00.239
i don't think anyone wants to name two douchebags

00:41:00.239 --> 00:41:02.760
in microphone number two i have my fucking invoice

00:41:02.760 --> 00:41:05.400
from the attorney i said do you want it he goes

00:41:05.400 --> 00:41:08.539
yeah and i go well too too fucking bad i said

00:41:08.539 --> 00:41:11.280
look it up if you're an attorney you can find

00:41:11.280 --> 00:41:14.769
out you can look it up So he didn't say anything

00:41:14.769 --> 00:41:16.489
for a little bit. And then he sends back another

00:41:16.489 --> 00:41:20.449
message and he goes, all right, A, you plan on

00:41:20.449 --> 00:41:23.289
keeping the trademark. B, you plan on relinquishing

00:41:23.289 --> 00:41:26.150
it. I need to know the answer right now. And

00:41:26.150 --> 00:41:29.369
I send him an answer back and I go, you can cordially

00:41:29.369 --> 00:41:33.090
go fuck yourself. I don't have to answer a fucking

00:41:33.090 --> 00:41:36.050
thing to you. I don't know who you are. You look

00:41:36.050 --> 00:41:38.909
up the attorney that filed my trademark and you

00:41:38.909 --> 00:41:41.849
talk to him and you leave me the fuck alone and

00:41:41.849 --> 00:41:45.730
don't ever. Ever. Ever text me again. Because

00:41:45.730 --> 00:41:48.750
I have everything saved. And it will go to the

00:41:48.750 --> 00:41:51.210
Attorney General if you keep screwing with me.

00:41:51.590 --> 00:41:55.969
Never heard from him again. Yeah. I hate dickheads

00:41:55.969 --> 00:41:59.170
that do that shit. Fucking hate them. So, anyhow.

00:41:59.369 --> 00:42:01.130
Alright. You know, that turned a little negative

00:42:01.130 --> 00:42:05.019
and I didn't want it to. Sorry, everybody. We

00:42:05.019 --> 00:42:06.599
got enough emails that are negative, probably.

00:42:06.900 --> 00:42:08.920
Yeah, I was going to say, because it sounds like

00:42:08.920 --> 00:42:11.519
our email. Yeah, it sounds like our email. So,

00:42:11.519 --> 00:42:15.480
Rob, let's turn it over to you. All right. I

00:42:15.480 --> 00:42:18.739
got one that I think may catch your attention.

00:42:19.119 --> 00:42:23.179
All right. Sounds good. That's in February. Okay.

00:42:24.519 --> 00:42:27.760
Arkansas is no stranger to festivals. No matter

00:42:27.760 --> 00:42:30.099
what kind of festival you're in the mood for,

00:42:30.300 --> 00:42:34.079
you can find it here. Whether it's food, music,

00:42:34.239 --> 00:42:37.820
animals, or quirky events, we have that and more.

00:42:38.460 --> 00:42:41.219
One of our favorite types of festivals is where

00:42:41.219 --> 00:42:43.980
you can get dressed up and participate in all

00:42:43.980 --> 00:42:51.300
the festivities. That's exactly what you'll get

00:42:51.300 --> 00:43:01.920
at the Arkansas Viking Day. Viking? Viking thing?

00:43:02.860 --> 00:43:10.699
Yeah, T -H -I -N -G. Oh, okay. Okay, the Viking

00:43:10.699 --> 00:43:14.340
Culture and History Festival is hosted by the

00:43:14.340 --> 00:43:17.900
Arkansas Renaissance Festival, a permanent picture

00:43:17.900 --> 00:43:21.599
festival of Mount Vernon. Channel your inner

00:43:21.599 --> 00:43:25.239
fairies, ghouls, pirates, or fearless knights.

00:43:25.639 --> 00:43:29.380
Come dressed to impress and enjoy all of them.

00:43:34.000 --> 00:43:36.340
Let's make the most of February by attending

00:43:36.340 --> 00:43:41.659
the unique Viking Festival in Arkansas. Huzzah,

00:43:41.659 --> 00:43:45.900
y 'all. The upcoming Arkansas Viking Day Festival

00:43:45.900 --> 00:43:51.239
is where mere men become legends. On February

00:43:51.239 --> 00:43:57.400
21st and February 22nd, 2026, this two -day event...

00:44:04.750 --> 00:44:10.250
Very cool. Sounds good to me. I mean, hanging

00:44:10.250 --> 00:44:13.269
around cool people like that, I always find that

00:44:13.269 --> 00:44:15.070
fun. You know, it's kind of like the Renaissance

00:44:15.070 --> 00:44:17.429
Festival on steroids or something like that,

00:44:17.510 --> 00:44:23.050
right? Yeah, but you're in Arkansas. You're around,

00:44:23.050 --> 00:44:26.750
well, halfway normal people. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:44:26.889 --> 00:44:29.849
Not only do I want to... I want to go to that,

00:44:29.909 --> 00:44:32.309
but else... It's not like the actual Renaissance

00:44:32.309 --> 00:44:36.210
Festival in Kansas City. It's more down -home,

00:44:36.230 --> 00:44:40.030
more people that would know more about it. Yeah,

00:44:40.030 --> 00:44:41.849
well, the Renaissance Festival, you know they

00:44:41.849 --> 00:44:44.550
have them everywhere. It's not just Kansas City.

00:44:44.750 --> 00:44:48.949
Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, that sounds like a lot

00:44:48.949 --> 00:44:51.369
of fun. This is their park, but they call it

00:44:51.369 --> 00:44:54.510
the Viking thing. The Viking thing. That's cool.

00:44:54.769 --> 00:45:03.230
I'd be willing to check it out. Well, I can't

00:45:03.230 --> 00:45:05.590
do this one, but maybe next year. The one that

00:45:05.590 --> 00:45:07.969
I really want to go to, and I think it's still

00:45:07.969 --> 00:45:11.050
in September, is the Bentonville Testicle Festival.

00:45:11.610 --> 00:45:14.469
Remember, we went over it on the show. Yes, yes,

00:45:15.329 --> 00:45:18.070
yes. We've got to go. They have fucking nude

00:45:18.070 --> 00:45:24.329
female mud wrestling. Yes. I cannot believe that.

00:45:25.000 --> 00:45:29.239
They have gunny sack people in their underwear,

00:45:29.340 --> 00:45:32.980
mud gunny sack wrestling, where, you know, each

00:45:32.980 --> 00:45:35.880
one has one leg in a gunny sack, two people,

00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:38.820
each one of them have their inner leg in the

00:45:38.820 --> 00:45:42.420
gunny sack, and they try to run in mud. I just,

00:45:42.599 --> 00:45:46.519
all that stuff. And all the... All the drinks

00:45:46.519 --> 00:45:49.420
you can drink. I could see me and you getting

00:45:49.420 --> 00:45:52.019
in on that. Oh, I could too. And then all the

00:45:52.019 --> 00:45:56.820
fried testicles and fucking boiled and whatever,

00:45:57.139 --> 00:46:01.380
sous vide testicle, all this bullshit. So anyhow,

00:46:01.500 --> 00:46:04.800
let's take our first break. And I've got a shit

00:46:04.800 --> 00:46:07.460
ton of emails, Rob. I think because of the cold

00:46:07.460 --> 00:46:10.260
weather, people are indoors emailing because

00:46:10.260 --> 00:46:14.519
they have nothing else to do. yeah it is good

00:46:14.519 --> 00:46:17.539
i got some good ones here too i have two featured

00:46:17.539 --> 00:46:20.139
ones i have two featured ones because they need

00:46:20.139 --> 00:46:24.039
to be so all right um i think what i'm going

00:46:24.039 --> 00:46:27.500
to do is i'm going to give this um this uh before

00:46:27.500 --> 00:46:31.039
we go to our break and go into our um our messages

00:46:31.039 --> 00:46:33.739
and stuff like that i'm going to give new guy

00:46:33.739 --> 00:46:37.280
a chance to do an editorial you like that idea

00:46:41.130 --> 00:46:42.809
Anything he wants to talk about? Anything he

00:46:42.809 --> 00:46:45.809
wants to talk about. That might cheer him up

00:46:45.809 --> 00:46:48.610
a little bit. I'm thinking so, too. So, all right.

00:46:48.710 --> 00:46:50.489
Let's give it a shot. Hey, I'm still going to

00:46:50.489 --> 00:46:52.230
try to piss him off, though, okay? Listen to

00:46:52.230 --> 00:46:57.289
this. Always. Hey, bitch, get over here. Hello,

00:46:57.969 --> 00:47:01.849
this is the new guy. There are some podcasts

00:47:01.849 --> 00:47:04.750
that are informative, educational, or even helpful.

00:47:05.349 --> 00:47:08.420
This is not one of them. These two clowns continue

00:47:08.420 --> 00:47:10.960
to butcher the English language, and they think

00:47:10.960 --> 00:47:14.760
it's cute. I, myself, wear earplugs and just

00:47:14.760 --> 00:47:17.739
smile and nod my head. Mark is so slow, he never

00:47:17.739 --> 00:47:21.900
catches it. I've wasted enough time talking about

00:47:21.900 --> 00:47:30.059
this abortion. That's all. Okay, bye. Since the

00:47:30.059 --> 00:47:32.639
dawn of time, weird shit has happened. Strange

00:47:32.639 --> 00:47:35.880
occurrences. Unexplained phobias. and other odd

00:47:35.880 --> 00:47:38.320
happenings. Over the next minute, we would like

00:47:38.320 --> 00:47:41.019
to bring you odd, rare phobias and conditions.

00:47:42.139 --> 00:47:45.619
Hutchinson -Gilford Progeria Syndrome. Cases

00:47:45.619 --> 00:47:49.599
known on Earth 100 to possibly 150. This causes

00:47:49.599 --> 00:47:52.039
young children to age quickly, such as hair loss,

00:47:52.219 --> 00:47:54.699
thin, fragile skin, and cardiovascular issues,

00:47:54.940 --> 00:47:57.519
while the child's mental capacity stays the same.

00:47:57.639 --> 00:48:00.539
There is unknown cure and very little treatment

00:48:00.539 --> 00:48:04.719
options. And now, a brand new feature, strange

00:48:04.719 --> 00:48:10.219
insults from an alien. May you always step in

00:48:10.219 --> 00:48:16.860
a wet spot after putting on fresh socks. Hey,

00:48:16.940 --> 00:48:19.179
if you're a fan of paying way too much for trinkets

00:48:19.179 --> 00:48:22.239
and food, well, your wish is coming true. Kansas

00:48:22.239 --> 00:48:24.440
City International Airport Guest Pass program

00:48:24.440 --> 00:48:27.960
is starting today. Yes, you too could overspend

00:48:27.960 --> 00:48:30.860
on workless trinkets and $15 cups of coffee.

00:48:31.400 --> 00:48:33.820
You want to buy a $50 cheap t -shirt that has

00:48:33.820 --> 00:48:36.880
KC Western Auto Building image on it? We got

00:48:36.880 --> 00:48:39.420
you covered. Want a barbecue sauce gift pack?

00:48:39.599 --> 00:48:42.199
No problem. Just a mere $40 and you're first

00:48:42.199 --> 00:48:45.400
born. Hurry. You know rubes are jumping all over

00:48:45.400 --> 00:48:48.860
to get to this complete rip -off. Because people

00:48:48.860 --> 00:48:52.679
are cheap. So you want proof that we love you

00:48:52.679 --> 00:48:54.539
here at Q -Douche Bates and Microphone Central?

00:48:55.239 --> 00:48:57.619
Here's a proof right here. How about the drink

00:48:57.619 --> 00:49:01.610
of the week? Hey, my little bacon bits. Do you

00:49:01.610 --> 00:49:04.050
need to get to Smashville pronto? Did your friends

00:49:04.050 --> 00:49:07.369
start without you? We have your solution. Adios,

00:49:07.369 --> 00:49:11.090
motherfuckers. Adios, motherfuckers is one stiff

00:49:11.090 --> 00:49:14.969
drink. It should be used with caution. One half

00:49:14.969 --> 00:49:17.449
ounce of vodka. One half ounce of rum. One half

00:49:17.449 --> 00:49:20.170
ounce of tequila. One half ounce of gin. One

00:49:20.170 --> 00:49:22.690
half ounce of blue curacao. Two ounces of sweet

00:49:22.690 --> 00:49:26.210
and sour mix. Sprite or 7 -Up. Use a lemon wedge

00:49:26.210 --> 00:49:29.630
as a garnish and put in a highball glass. Bam.

00:49:30.329 --> 00:49:33.869
There you go. Hey, everybody, this is Uncle Rob.

00:49:34.170 --> 00:49:38.869
I'm going to give you some tips for life. This

00:49:38.869 --> 00:49:43.349
is Uncle Rob's rules to dick pics. Rule number

00:49:43.349 --> 00:49:47.789
one, type of a pic in someone else's name so

00:49:47.789 --> 00:49:52.090
if you get busted, it's not yours. Rule number

00:49:52.090 --> 00:49:56.250
two, shoot angles complementary to your length

00:49:56.250 --> 00:50:03.199
and girth. Rule number four, Bopping of the leg.

00:50:04.440 --> 00:50:09.860
Absolutely no undercarriage. Very important.

00:50:11.800 --> 00:50:15.960
The boll weevil clap. Read up on that sometime.

00:50:18.320 --> 00:50:21.179
The boll weevil clap, and this old guy that I

00:50:21.179 --> 00:50:24.940
knew that was in Vietnam, I probably should say,

00:50:25.000 --> 00:50:26.679
well, you know what, you can take this part out

00:50:26.679 --> 00:50:29.780
of here if you like it. and we could put it somewhere

00:50:29.780 --> 00:50:31.920
but this old guy that i knew down the road for

00:50:31.920 --> 00:50:35.820
me there was a vietnam he told me that uh one

00:50:35.820 --> 00:50:38.840
day you know him and a couple of guys um got

00:50:38.840 --> 00:50:42.159
a day off from the war so they went into the

00:50:42.159 --> 00:50:44.079
nearest town to go look for some hookers you

00:50:44.079 --> 00:50:45.800
know they're like you know if we're going to

00:50:45.800 --> 00:50:48.559
die we're going to get laid so okay all right

00:50:48.559 --> 00:50:52.239
so they go in there and i guess the the vietcong

00:50:52.239 --> 00:50:56.579
loaded them full loaded the prostitutes full

00:50:56.579 --> 00:51:01.050
this stuff called The bowl we will clap. Yeah.

00:51:01.269 --> 00:51:04.889
Oh, it is. So anyhow, he said, you know, they

00:51:04.889 --> 00:51:07.809
all went and, you know, did what they needed

00:51:07.809 --> 00:51:09.389
to do. You know, they thought they were all going

00:51:09.389 --> 00:51:11.670
to die. So they went and they got laid. And the

00:51:11.670 --> 00:51:13.869
next day, when a guy comes in, he goes, oh, my

00:51:13.869 --> 00:51:17.469
God. He goes, I hurt so bad. You know, my fucking

00:51:17.469 --> 00:51:21.489
dick hurts like hell. My stomach hurts. I think

00:51:21.489 --> 00:51:23.170
I'm going to die. What did they do with those

00:51:23.170 --> 00:51:26.900
damn hookers? So anyhow, and he started hurting

00:51:26.900 --> 00:51:28.800
really bad. He said it hurt so bad you could

00:51:28.800 --> 00:51:31.139
hardly breathe. You could feel it in your dick

00:51:31.139 --> 00:51:35.059
shaft. It hurt so bad. So they all go in, and

00:51:35.059 --> 00:51:38.460
I guess it's like a horrible infection. And if

00:51:38.460 --> 00:51:40.960
you don't get it treated, it will kill you. Like,

00:51:40.960 --> 00:51:43.619
you know, go up your scrotum and into your testicles.

00:51:44.119 --> 00:51:48.420
And anyhow, the only cure back then was is they

00:51:48.420 --> 00:51:52.380
had to take this glass rod and shove it in the

00:51:52.380 --> 00:51:56.469
end of your penis. and mash it with a rubber

00:51:56.469 --> 00:51:59.469
mallet. And then you have to physically squeeze

00:51:59.469 --> 00:52:03.530
all the infection out of your penis. I've heard

00:52:03.530 --> 00:52:07.730
of this. Yes. And this took like four hours of

00:52:07.730 --> 00:52:13.050
mashing this rod and then squeezing all the infection

00:52:13.050 --> 00:52:14.690
out. Because if they don't get all the infection

00:52:14.690 --> 00:52:16.670
out right then... It just flares right back up.

00:52:16.730 --> 00:52:20.239
Yes. Seals your pee -pee shut. Yes. Yeah, that

00:52:20.239 --> 00:52:23.000
was the old joke of, you know, if you catch VD,

00:52:23.079 --> 00:52:25.099
your dick's going to turn black and fall off.

00:52:25.260 --> 00:52:28.019
But there are actually STDs. That was the worst

00:52:28.019 --> 00:52:30.820
case scenario, yeah. It actually will turn black

00:52:30.820 --> 00:52:34.300
and fall off because the tissue will die. Yeah,

00:52:34.360 --> 00:52:38.679
it's kind of like a Gann Green type of deal,

00:52:38.760 --> 00:52:40.980
you know, or something like that. So anyhow,

00:52:41.360 --> 00:52:44.940
yeah, he said after that, he said, no, no more

00:52:44.940 --> 00:52:50.480
hookers. Two douchebags and microphone in an

00:52:50.480 --> 00:52:53.880
effort to keep everything fresh. We offer you

00:52:53.880 --> 00:53:00.860
first world problems. Damn it. I can't decide

00:53:00.860 --> 00:53:05.960
between nachos, chili, or wings for the game

00:53:05.960 --> 00:53:10.300
tonight. This is bullshit. I should not have

00:53:10.300 --> 00:53:14.320
to make decisions like this. Hi there. This is

00:53:14.320 --> 00:53:18.429
your ears. Why are you listening to this garbage?

00:53:19.349 --> 00:53:22.769
I thought we were friends. Have you ever wondered

00:53:22.769 --> 00:53:25.010
what something came about? Have you ever looked

00:53:25.010 --> 00:53:26.849
at something and said, Hey, I wonder what the

00:53:26.849 --> 00:53:30.550
origin of that is? Well, so have we. That's why

00:53:30.550 --> 00:53:34.369
we give you the origin of... The origin of the

00:53:34.369 --> 00:53:36.690
middle finger. The origin of the middle finger

00:53:36.690 --> 00:53:39.789
gesture is an insult, is debated, but it's widely

00:53:39.789 --> 00:53:42.070
believed to have roots in ancient Greece and

00:53:42.070 --> 00:53:44.469
Rome, specifically asleep to phallic symbolism.

00:53:45.079 --> 00:53:47.480
and used as a way to express insults, taunt,

00:53:47.500 --> 00:53:50.320
or even ward off evil. The specific origins are

00:53:50.320 --> 00:53:52.380
unclear. The middle finger has been documented

00:53:52.380 --> 00:53:55.139
as a gesture of disrespected anger for over two

00:53:55.139 --> 00:53:59.079
millennia. All aware of the Amber Alert, right?

00:53:59.300 --> 00:54:01.699
Well, get rid of your disinfectants and rubber

00:54:01.699 --> 00:54:04.460
bedspreads, kids. It's the all -new Amber Herd

00:54:04.460 --> 00:54:07.659
Alert System. This fantastic early warning device

00:54:07.659 --> 00:54:10.099
helps one stay dry and rid of all those annoying

00:54:10.099 --> 00:54:13.429
mattress invoices. Simply hook up to child under

00:54:13.429 --> 00:54:15.949
six or psychopath and wait for the running water

00:54:15.949 --> 00:54:18.789
sound. This clever machine has three distinct

00:54:18.789 --> 00:54:21.449
settings, babbling brook, ocean waves, and roaring

00:54:21.449 --> 00:54:24.570
river for those close calls. Order today and

00:54:24.570 --> 00:54:31.750
get a free Cinnabon re -music cartridge. Our

00:54:31.750 --> 00:54:35.210
constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's

00:54:35.210 --> 00:54:38.809
strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

00:54:39.289 --> 00:54:41.880
Mate. Your five -year -old neighbor have all

00:54:41.880 --> 00:54:44.880
their violin lessons during all of your hangovers.

00:54:45.239 --> 00:54:49.420
Next up, things ever heard in hell. Hurry up.

00:54:49.760 --> 00:54:52.980
Kim Jong -un is playing Santa at the mall again

00:54:52.980 --> 00:54:57.500
this year. Yay! And now we look in on the adventures

00:54:57.500 --> 00:55:01.059
of the technical explanation guy. Excuse me,

00:55:01.059 --> 00:55:04.179
my dear sir. Could you please put my plain bread

00:55:04.179 --> 00:55:06.380
in a small countertop appliance with heating

00:55:06.380 --> 00:55:08.730
elements that would spring loaded? And would

00:55:08.730 --> 00:55:11.570
brown my bread adequately? Well, first off, I'm

00:55:11.570 --> 00:55:14.050
not a waiter. I'm just a guy over there sitting

00:55:14.050 --> 00:55:17.010
at the table having a drink. Second off, are

00:55:17.010 --> 00:55:18.829
you talking about someone toasting your bread?

00:55:19.250 --> 00:55:21.869
Well, yes. Yes, I am. I'm talking about my bread

00:55:21.869 --> 00:55:24.030
being toasted. Then why don't you just ask for

00:55:24.030 --> 00:55:26.590
your bread to be toasted, you dumb bastard? What

00:55:26.590 --> 00:55:28.829
the hell's wrong with you? Hey, you yankers.

00:55:28.909 --> 00:55:31.510
We often think many things are just true because

00:55:31.510 --> 00:55:34.050
we've heard it our whole lives. That's why here

00:55:34.050 --> 00:55:35.969
at Two Douchebags and Microphone, we developed

00:55:35.969 --> 00:55:40.030
the segment... Not true. We investigate and uncover

00:55:40.030 --> 00:55:44.610
the real truth of what happened. We've heard

00:55:44.610 --> 00:55:47.050
for years that Einstein was so intelligent he

00:55:47.050 --> 00:55:50.429
could not figure out how to tie his shoe. The

00:55:50.429 --> 00:55:54.110
fact is, he disliked wearing socks. He would

00:55:54.110 --> 00:55:56.670
put socks over his shoes to avoid tying them.

00:55:56.730 --> 00:55:59.489
He believed tying shoelaces was an incredible

00:55:59.489 --> 00:56:03.409
waste of time. So were Crocs when Einstein needed

00:56:03.409 --> 00:56:16.880
them. To Douchebags and Microphone, I'm Mark

00:56:16.880 --> 00:56:20.719
here in the Kansas City vicinity at the Talk

00:56:20.719 --> 00:56:29.800
is Cheap studio. And I am Rob in Wheatland, Missouri,

00:56:30.079 --> 00:56:33.699
home of the magnificent Lucas Oil Speedway and

00:56:33.699 --> 00:56:37.300
Water Track, and also home of Pecamo's Country

00:56:37.300 --> 00:56:49.739
Store, where you can find... Thank you, Rob.

00:56:50.360 --> 00:56:52.260
All right, we're going to go ahead and get the

00:56:52.260 --> 00:56:54.619
emails because we got a shit ton of them, which

00:56:54.619 --> 00:56:57.920
is cool. All right. Hey, Mark, remember the high

00:56:57.920 --> 00:57:01.260
school football coach that had us buck hay on

00:57:01.260 --> 00:57:04.659
his farm for a form of football practice? Do

00:57:04.659 --> 00:57:07.960
you remember his name? Mitch, the all -time greatest

00:57:07.960 --> 00:57:13.639
emailer. Yes, I do know his name. He was Coach

00:57:13.639 --> 00:57:20.769
Brown. and i i can't think of his charlie no

00:57:20.769 --> 00:57:27.030
no no no um chuck chuck no everyone fucked with

00:57:27.030 --> 00:57:31.409
him yeah yeah yeah yeah chuck he went by chuck

00:57:31.409 --> 00:57:35.389
chuck brown and yeah he used to do that it was

00:57:35.389 --> 00:57:38.010
kind of like karate kid you know where wax on

00:57:38.010 --> 00:57:42.210
wax off the car And he was right. Bucking hay

00:57:42.210 --> 00:57:44.409
was like one of the best workouts you could do.

00:57:44.809 --> 00:57:47.170
So he's like, hey, boys, I got some hay over

00:57:47.170 --> 00:57:49.869
on my land. You know, instead of doing this,

00:57:49.929 --> 00:57:51.730
running up and down the field, let's just go

00:57:51.730 --> 00:57:55.110
buck that. So we all jump in the truck and go,

00:57:55.170 --> 00:57:58.630
yeah, let's go buck hay. A lot of people gave

00:57:58.630 --> 00:58:01.510
him shit and the school made him stop. It's funny

00:58:01.510 --> 00:58:03.769
that Mitch remembers this because I didn't think

00:58:03.769 --> 00:58:06.469
he went to Midway. Didn't he go to Belton? He

00:58:06.469 --> 00:58:10.190
never really did. Okay, I guess he... No, I don't

00:58:10.190 --> 00:58:13.570
remember him being in a belt. Okay, then he must

00:58:13.570 --> 00:58:15.369
have went to Midway because he knew about this.

00:58:15.369 --> 00:58:18.010
I think he went to Midway. Okay. Come on, he

00:58:18.010 --> 00:58:20.329
is from Freeman. Yeah, you know what? That's

00:58:20.329 --> 00:58:22.070
right. He probably lived there then. You know,

00:58:22.110 --> 00:58:27.550
my memory's fucked. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Chuck Brown.

00:58:30.199 --> 00:58:34.079
Yeah, and all us kids loved it. The school made

00:58:34.079 --> 00:58:36.019
him quit because they said, you know, he's getting,

00:58:36.079 --> 00:58:38.019
like, free labor from us. But all of us were

00:58:38.019 --> 00:58:40.000
like, no, we want to do it. We don't want to

00:58:40.000 --> 00:58:41.679
be out there running up and down the field. We'd

00:58:41.679 --> 00:58:44.800
rather help him anyhow. And it's just as good

00:58:44.800 --> 00:58:46.639
a workout, if not better, but the school made

00:58:46.639 --> 00:58:51.340
us quit. Yeah, he was Chuck Brown, and he was

00:58:51.340 --> 00:58:55.690
the head coach for... a year and a half, and

00:58:55.690 --> 00:58:57.690
then he became an assistant coach when they hired

00:58:57.690 --> 00:59:00.409
some new guy that I can't think of his name from

00:59:00.409 --> 00:59:05.550
the city. Oh, well, it doesn't matter. We had

00:59:05.550 --> 00:59:09.170
Coach Greg Williams. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bounty

00:59:09.170 --> 00:59:14.190
Gate. Bounty Gate, Greg Williams. Yeah, Bounty

00:59:14.190 --> 00:59:17.289
Gate, Greg Williams. Yeah, that guy. That's who

00:59:17.289 --> 00:59:21.050
was our coach when I was at Belton. I told my

00:59:21.050 --> 00:59:24.289
big boss that at work, and he was kind of enamored

00:59:24.289 --> 00:59:27.449
by that, like I was after he told me that. I'm

00:59:27.449 --> 00:59:31.309
like, wow. Yeah. It was the Greg Williams, yeah.

00:59:31.610 --> 00:59:36.469
Wow. Interesting. The funny thing is, Milton

00:59:36.469 --> 00:59:40.710
had one of the biggest losing streaks behind

00:59:40.710 --> 00:59:44.909
him. No, that's what... Then he went to college

00:59:44.909 --> 00:59:49.849
and then to the NFL. Mm -hmm. Yeah, and he's

00:59:49.849 --> 00:59:54.409
even got a Super Bowl ring, too. So, wow. Yeah.

00:59:55.050 --> 01:00:00.730
I talked to one of the guys after, well, we hadn't

01:00:00.730 --> 01:00:04.409
heard nothing from him since the St. Louis and

01:00:04.409 --> 01:00:08.690
Tennessee Titans Super Bowl. Uh -huh. And then

01:00:08.690 --> 01:00:11.369
me and this other guy, we're, you know, we're,

01:00:11.369 --> 01:00:16.110
he's in Belton and I'm up in St. Joe. We're watching

01:00:16.110 --> 01:00:28.329
the Super Bowl. coordinator for Titans during

01:00:28.329 --> 01:00:30.570
that Super Bowl. And we're like, hey, what the

01:00:30.570 --> 01:00:35.349
fuck? Oh, wow. Ain't no way that's him. I mean,

01:00:35.389 --> 01:01:14.860
you look at it, you could tell it was him. Fucking

01:01:14.860 --> 01:01:18.199
cool. That would have been really interesting.

01:01:18.380 --> 01:01:21.139
You lose track of him. Then you're watching the

01:01:21.139 --> 01:01:24.840
Super Bowl and you're like, is that him? No,

01:01:25.440 --> 01:01:30.579
that ain't Coach. Yeah, fuck it is. Man, he showed

01:01:30.579 --> 01:01:34.500
everybody, didn't he? And I had to call a buddy

01:01:34.500 --> 01:01:37.139
of mine just to clarify. I said, did you see

01:01:37.139 --> 01:01:41.539
who that was? Yeah, I did. Like, fuck yeah. It

01:01:41.539 --> 01:01:45.969
was Coach Williams. And speaking of Coach Williams...

01:01:45.969 --> 01:01:49.650
He goes from making $20 ,000 a year to $20 million

01:01:49.650 --> 01:01:57.369
a year. Wow. Yeah, well, roughly, yeah. That's

01:01:57.369 --> 01:02:01.550
what we say. He's got that equivalence, you know

01:02:01.550 --> 01:02:03.929
what I mean? He made in the millions, I'm sure.

01:02:04.650 --> 01:02:31.519
Yeah, you go from... What did the Houston Oilers

01:02:31.519 --> 01:02:36.840
do? They become the Tennessee Titans. He went

01:02:36.840 --> 01:02:41.139
with them to Tennessee. He was already in Houston

01:02:41.139 --> 01:02:51.179
with them. I do remember that. Yep. Okay. Yeah.

01:02:52.199 --> 01:02:55.719
Wow. Okay. All right. I'm going to get back to

01:02:55.719 --> 01:02:59.400
emails. Thank you, Rob. Yeah. All right. Next

01:02:59.400 --> 01:03:02.440
one. Yes, I'm very superstitious and firmly live

01:03:02.440 --> 01:03:05.920
by it. It's worked so far. Rossington in Texas.

01:03:06.300 --> 01:03:13.639
Ross, thank you. Let's see. What was I going

01:03:13.639 --> 01:03:18.079
to say now? This is in reply to the question

01:03:18.079 --> 01:03:20.780
of the week, if you're superstitious. So thank

01:03:20.780 --> 01:03:25.489
you, Ross. All right. All right. Next one. I

01:03:25.489 --> 01:03:27.769
love the police blotter guy who actually does

01:03:27.769 --> 01:03:29.969
that voice. If you don't mind giving me away

01:03:29.969 --> 01:03:33.449
a secret and all. April in Knoxville. Yeah, it's

01:03:33.449 --> 01:03:38.329
Johnny Dare. No, I'm joking. It is not. No, it

01:03:38.329 --> 01:03:46.050
is not. Yeah. No, no, it is not. It's a voice

01:03:46.050 --> 01:03:51.909
that I get. It's AI. And it works very well.

01:03:54.139 --> 01:03:58.159
It works really well because I get tired. I mean,

01:03:58.179 --> 01:04:01.000
I got to be honest about this. All the voiceover

01:04:01.000 --> 01:04:07.300
guys and gals have fucking attitudes. They want

01:04:07.300 --> 01:04:11.159
you to hand the stuff to them on a plate and

01:04:11.159 --> 01:04:14.239
make everything just pretty and easy as you can

01:04:14.239 --> 01:04:17.360
for them. And it's irritating as fuck, because

01:04:17.360 --> 01:04:19.420
they get kind of smart -mouthed when you don't,

01:04:19.420 --> 01:04:21.480
and you really need these people to do this.

01:04:21.539 --> 01:04:23.780
I love the fact that I got all these voices at

01:04:23.780 --> 01:04:26.059
my fingertips now, and I don't have to deal with

01:04:26.059 --> 01:04:29.119
that. I mean, you know, I like a lot of them,

01:04:29.159 --> 01:04:31.280
and I got to know a lot of them, but they're

01:04:31.280 --> 01:04:34.579
a pain in the ass. So, anyhow, it's an AI voice

01:04:34.579 --> 01:04:37.820
that I get. So, all right. And it sucks. As much

01:04:37.820 --> 01:04:40.320
as we bitch about AI, we've got to depend on

01:04:40.320 --> 01:04:45.480
it for the show. Yeah. I mean, they... The voiceover

01:04:45.480 --> 01:04:48.199
people get pretty surly. And I don't know why

01:04:48.199 --> 01:04:50.519
that is. I mean, to me, it sounds like a fun

01:04:50.519 --> 01:04:56.219
fucking job. It's not this new guy. This is real

01:04:56.219 --> 01:05:03.719
life shit. Yeah. Yep. Yeah, so thank you. Yeah.

01:05:04.519 --> 01:05:07.920
Let's see. And it looks like Seattle has just

01:05:07.920 --> 01:05:14.460
won the NFC Conference Champion game. 31 to 27.

01:05:14.840 --> 01:05:18.780
All right. I love the police blotter guy. Oh,

01:05:18.780 --> 01:05:20.780
wait a minute. That's the wrong one. Okay. I

01:05:20.780 --> 01:05:22.780
heard one of you guys talking about going to

01:05:22.780 --> 01:05:26.860
Bimini Island by ferry. I have, and we went in

01:05:26.860 --> 01:05:29.280
September, which was a mistake. The waves were

01:05:29.280 --> 01:05:32.039
so rough during that month. People were sick.

01:05:32.139 --> 01:05:34.159
You couldn't hardly walk around because of the

01:05:34.159 --> 01:05:37.139
constant turbulence. We got to the island and

01:05:37.139 --> 01:05:39.599
the beach was closed due to rip currents. We

01:05:39.599 --> 01:05:41.559
were supposed to stay three nights, but we lost

01:05:41.559 --> 01:05:43.860
money to come back to Fort Lauderdale that evening.

01:05:44.039 --> 01:05:47.719
The beaches were fine in Florida. Miss Jane in

01:05:47.719 --> 01:05:52.860
Boston. Um, well, you have to be careful. about

01:05:52.860 --> 01:05:55.239
what time of year you go. And I mean, this is

01:05:55.239 --> 01:05:57.900
from, you know, I've traveled enough and went

01:05:57.900 --> 01:06:00.559
on enough vacations, I know this. And I found

01:06:00.559 --> 01:06:02.840
this through trial and error, and I'm sure you

01:06:02.840 --> 01:06:05.320
have too, Rob, and stuff like that. You have

01:06:05.320 --> 01:06:07.920
to watch what time of the year. It's just like

01:06:07.920 --> 01:06:11.320
going to Colorado. If you go there in like mid

01:06:11.320 --> 01:06:14.059
to late September, you might very well get involved

01:06:14.059 --> 01:06:18.219
in a snowstorm, right? Right. Well, this is no

01:06:18.219 --> 01:06:21.880
different. Only it's like the hurricane season

01:06:21.880 --> 01:06:24.980
kicks in pretty strong in September. It's one

01:06:24.980 --> 01:06:28.179
of the strongest months for hurricanes. So there's

01:06:28.179 --> 01:06:30.380
a lot of turbulence over the Atlantic and the

01:06:30.380 --> 01:06:33.760
Gulf of Mexico and all that. So, yeah, I believe

01:06:33.760 --> 01:06:36.619
it probably was turbulent, and it did make you

01:06:36.619 --> 01:06:41.400
sick. I mean, I happen to know this, but it doesn't

01:06:41.400 --> 01:06:43.719
sound like you did. You just don't go in September,

01:06:43.960 --> 01:06:49.019
in my opinion. All right. Oh, this is a cool

01:06:49.019 --> 01:06:51.619
one, Rob. All right. Hey, douches, I need your

01:06:51.619 --> 01:06:54.480
best avocado dip recipe for a potluck dinner.

01:06:54.820 --> 01:06:58.179
Please and thank you. You're the best. Wes in

01:06:58.179 --> 01:07:09.460
Houston. Rob? I just do avocados and roto. Okay.

01:07:09.559 --> 01:07:11.500
Yep. There you go. That's what I did. Perfect.

01:07:12.139 --> 01:07:14.539
Avocados and Rotel. That sounds great, Rob. You

01:07:14.539 --> 01:07:18.260
saved it. I didn't know what to tell him. Well,

01:07:19.179 --> 01:07:21.739
you've got to add a little garlic powder. Oh,

01:07:21.760 --> 01:07:23.940
yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't forget the garlic powder.

01:07:24.280 --> 01:07:26.340
Listen to Rob. He knows what he's talking about.

01:07:29.420 --> 01:07:31.940
Let's see. Next one. I thought I needed to take

01:07:31.940 --> 01:07:35.639
out... Thank you, Wes in Houston. Thank you,

01:07:35.699 --> 01:07:39.760
Wes. Actually, I like that question. I just kind

01:07:39.760 --> 01:07:41.980
of forgot about it. I'm like, oh, shit, I was

01:07:41.980 --> 01:07:44.480
supposed to look up an avocado recipe. Oh, well.

01:07:44.940 --> 01:07:49.500
All right. Why don't you eat an avocado recipe?

01:07:51.159 --> 01:07:54.340
I don't know. That's a good question. Oh. Yeah.

01:07:54.960 --> 01:07:56.679
Well, if you're in Houston, you should be used

01:07:56.679 --> 01:08:00.429
to that. Oh, well. I thought I needed to take

01:08:00.429 --> 01:08:03.389
out the garbage. The next one. I thought I needed

01:08:03.389 --> 01:08:05.329
to take out the garbage, but it turns out the

01:08:05.329 --> 01:08:07.809
smell was because I left the podcast on in the

01:08:07.809 --> 01:08:10.409
other room, and the smell seeped into the whole

01:08:10.409 --> 01:08:14.110
house. Tony in Nashville. We warn you of that.

01:08:14.389 --> 01:08:16.210
Yeah, we tell you that all the time. We warn

01:08:16.210 --> 01:08:19.250
you of that. Yeah. Dumbass, that's on you, Tony.

01:08:21.529 --> 01:08:23.750
You should know better. Get some Renews It if

01:08:23.750 --> 01:08:25.850
you got our show going on. Everyone knows this.

01:08:27.529 --> 01:08:30.010
Gosh, man, you know, you can only tell people

01:08:30.010 --> 01:08:34.350
so many times. I know, man. Please, everybody,

01:08:34.909 --> 01:08:37.670
bleach your Bluetooth. We tell you that, too.

01:08:38.170 --> 01:08:42.409
Yeah, yeah. Listen, we say we suck, so you telling

01:08:42.409 --> 01:08:45.050
us we suck means nothing. We already said it.

01:08:46.289 --> 01:08:50.609
After every podcast, I have to bleach my Bluetooth.

01:08:50.750 --> 01:08:54.590
I do. So, you know, you guys should, too, listen

01:08:54.590 --> 01:08:58.430
to it. But I would also like to add that we smell

01:08:58.430 --> 01:09:01.409
better than your mom. Tell her she's not so fresh

01:09:01.409 --> 01:09:05.250
in that special area. Okay. Yep. I'll give you

01:09:05.250 --> 01:09:08.989
that one. All right. Yep. All right. Next one.

01:09:09.289 --> 01:09:11.970
Superstitions are for losers who want to explain

01:09:11.970 --> 01:09:14.829
away their stupid decisions constantly. Wally

01:09:14.829 --> 01:09:21.840
and OP. And I think that's Overland Park. Whatever.

01:09:22.020 --> 01:09:24.899
I don't care. I mean, someone has superstitions.

01:09:24.899 --> 01:09:27.220
It doesn't hurt me. Do you care? I do. I have

01:09:27.220 --> 01:09:31.500
superstitions. I have... Superstitions are beliefs,

01:09:31.739 --> 01:09:35.180
and everybody has their own beliefs. That's right.

01:09:35.640 --> 01:09:37.979
And you know what? And even if it isn't true,

01:09:38.039 --> 01:09:39.579
if it makes you feel better, what the fuck's

01:09:39.579 --> 01:09:41.739
wrong with that? So you throw a little bit of

01:09:41.739 --> 01:09:43.460
salt over your shoulder or something like that.

01:09:43.600 --> 01:09:46.859
No big deal. You're not hurting anybody. All

01:09:46.859 --> 01:09:53.100
right. Oh, speaking of throwing salt over this

01:09:53.100 --> 01:09:56.039
next one. I always watch out for black cats,

01:09:56.159 --> 01:09:58.800
throw salt over my shoulder, etc. Whether it's

01:09:58.800 --> 01:10:01.220
real or not, I don't care. Doing those things

01:10:01.220 --> 01:10:03.880
make me feel better and more secure, so I go

01:10:03.880 --> 01:10:07.600
with it. Guthrie in Oklahoma City. Yeah, what

01:10:07.600 --> 01:10:10.279
I just said. Go for it, man. Yeah. Go for it,

01:10:10.300 --> 01:10:12.079
Guthrie. Guthrie, I think it's awesome. It'll

01:10:12.079 --> 01:10:15.180
make you feel comfortable. Yep. Yep, we don't

01:10:15.180 --> 01:10:17.699
care. Yep, we're not like that other asshole

01:10:17.699 --> 01:10:19.079
that gives a shit. It'll make you feel comfortable.

01:10:19.680 --> 01:10:22.840
Yep. We're all about that. So thank you, Guthrie.

01:10:23.300 --> 01:10:26.300
And now I have two featured emails, Rob. Are

01:10:26.300 --> 01:10:31.020
you ready for them? Yep. All right. Mark, I know

01:10:31.020 --> 01:10:33.380
what you're, and this is Rob too, okay? So like,

01:10:33.479 --> 01:10:35.960
put my name down, but go ahead and put Rob and

01:10:35.960 --> 01:10:39.840
Topher with this too. Mark Robin Topher, I know

01:10:39.840 --> 01:10:41.979
what you're doing and it's brilliant. The people

01:10:41.979 --> 01:10:45.039
that identify with you listen because of you

01:10:45.039 --> 01:10:47.300
and the people that identify with Rob listen

01:10:47.300 --> 01:10:50.300
to him. Having two completely different hosts

01:10:50.300 --> 01:10:57.399
is the genius. Ralph and DC. Okay, I can't take

01:10:57.399 --> 01:11:01.779
credit for that. No, none of us can. No, because

01:11:01.779 --> 01:11:04.899
that's been done forever. Good cop, bad cop.

01:11:05.570 --> 01:11:08.250
especially like shows like this and radio shows

01:11:08.250 --> 01:11:10.909
and stuff like that, is you don't want someone

01:11:10.909 --> 01:11:13.850
that thinks just like you to be your counterpart.

01:11:14.229 --> 01:11:16.329
You want someone that's going to argue with you

01:11:16.329 --> 01:11:20.149
and kind of agitate you and pick at you. And

01:11:20.149 --> 01:11:24.689
you know what I mean? It's nothing new. I appreciate

01:11:24.689 --> 01:11:29.869
the, Ralph, I appreciate the comments, but we

01:11:29.869 --> 01:11:32.810
can't take credit for that, can we? I mean, it's

01:11:32.810 --> 01:11:38.869
been done forever. You know? Yeah. So thank you.

01:11:39.130 --> 01:11:44.090
All right. Truth be told, we're trying to be

01:11:44.090 --> 01:11:46.250
like everybody else. We're trying to be like

01:11:46.250 --> 01:11:48.909
a morning show. Yeah. And we say that in the

01:11:48.909 --> 01:11:54.489
motto, everything. Yeah. And it's working out

01:11:54.489 --> 01:11:57.779
for us, honestly. Yeah, yeah, we're doing very

01:11:57.779 --> 01:12:02.260
well. I still have Topher on getting that million

01:12:02.260 --> 01:12:06.300
download. Congratulations. We haven't forgot

01:12:06.300 --> 01:12:08.880
it. We just got to harness it. And there's a

01:12:08.880 --> 01:12:11.720
way. We'll figure it out. All right. And finally,

01:12:12.079 --> 01:12:16.180
this one. Hey, guys. Not only did I go to the

01:12:16.180 --> 01:12:20.180
Dr. Pepper Museum once, but twice. And the Texas

01:12:20.180 --> 01:12:24.380
Ranger Museum. Yep. That was Mark's suggestion,

01:12:24.680 --> 01:12:27.859
and I was not sorry I stopped by. I went there,

01:12:27.960 --> 01:12:31.279
and I was tripping around America, and then again

01:12:31.279 --> 01:12:34.939
when I moved to Atlanta. I bought three 12 -pack

01:12:34.939 --> 01:12:37.479
bottles of the original Dr. Pepper, and I'm down

01:12:37.479 --> 01:12:39.899
to three bottles, which means I will have to

01:12:39.899 --> 01:12:42.140
go back because they don't ship them anymore.

01:12:42.359 --> 01:12:46.460
Okay, thank you, Ronnie. Remember, I didn't know

01:12:46.460 --> 01:12:49.399
if they still shipped them. I guess they don't.

01:12:49.399 --> 01:12:54.989
All right. um anyhow um let's see i'll have to

01:12:54.989 --> 01:12:56.449
go back because they don't ship them anymore

01:12:56.449 --> 01:13:00.270
thanks for the mention ronnie and tulsa the tulsa

01:13:00.270 --> 01:13:06.630
king thank you ronnie um yeah yes always yep

01:13:06.630 --> 01:13:10.310
um and the thing is is there like i said on the

01:13:10.310 --> 01:13:15.270
last podcast there are dr pepper recipes that

01:13:15.270 --> 01:13:17.449
are in bottles little seven ounce bottles and

01:13:17.449 --> 01:13:21.760
all that that are like really close to the original

01:13:21.760 --> 01:13:27.500
formula but the only original formula that there

01:13:27.500 --> 01:13:31.560
is anywhere is only sold in waco texas or surrounding

01:13:31.560 --> 01:13:33.640
areas they have been some stores around that

01:13:33.640 --> 01:13:36.899
area in texas and that's it and the whole difference

01:13:36.899 --> 01:13:40.399
is is not only the imperial cane sugar but it's

01:13:40.399 --> 01:13:44.020
the artesian well water that they use in that

01:13:44.020 --> 01:13:47.579
original recipe which makes that dr pepper just

01:13:47.579 --> 01:13:51.270
over the top And it sounds like Ronnie knows

01:13:51.270 --> 01:13:54.390
that too. And I'm telling you, if you ever get

01:13:54.390 --> 01:13:56.670
a chance to get that stuff, do it. If you like

01:13:56.670 --> 01:13:59.750
Dr. Pepper or soft drinks, that thing is the

01:13:59.750 --> 01:14:03.189
creme de la creme of all of them. It is the best.

01:14:03.710 --> 01:14:06.350
So those are our two featured emails. Like I

01:14:06.350 --> 01:14:08.489
said, we had a ton of them. Thank you guys for

01:14:08.489 --> 01:14:10.149
writing in. Keep writing them in, man. That's

01:14:10.149 --> 01:14:12.170
great. All of them were really good, I thought,

01:14:12.250 --> 01:14:16.939
even the ones that were making fun of us. Yep,

01:14:17.039 --> 01:14:19.079
hate mail goes to the front. We've always said

01:14:19.079 --> 01:14:22.119
this. We have nothing against people disliking

01:14:22.119 --> 01:14:25.539
us and saying shit. You know, if we're renting

01:14:25.539 --> 01:14:29.020
space in your mind, that's fine with us. All

01:14:29.020 --> 01:14:32.199
right, Rob, I'm pretty sure you got a bag of

01:14:32.199 --> 01:14:36.680
garbage or something going on, don't you? He

01:14:36.680 --> 01:14:42.920
sure does. The greatest segment ever. Oh, shit.

01:14:47.139 --> 01:14:49.859
Oh, it was a good candy bar, too. Oh, what kind?

01:14:51.680 --> 01:14:58.640
Let's see here. It was a Hershey's. Oh, it was

01:14:58.640 --> 01:15:04.079
a Hershey's cake. Triple chocolate cake. Oh,

01:15:04.079 --> 01:15:09.439
wow. It was good. I remember that. Very cool.

01:15:11.779 --> 01:15:18.210
Okay. First up tonight. Okay. exposition, Dr.

01:15:18.430 --> 01:15:24.430
Raymond Martinot embarked in a project that startled

01:15:24.430 --> 01:15:28.710
the world. Driven by love and greed, he attempted

01:15:28.710 --> 01:15:34.409
to ironically preserve his wife in a homemade

01:15:34.409 --> 01:15:41.270
freezer. Hoping to halt decomposition and perhaps

01:15:41.270 --> 01:15:46.090
one day restore life. Conducting entirely outside

01:15:46.090 --> 01:15:50.020
of balance. of formal science, the experiment

01:15:50.020 --> 01:15:54.100
fascinated some, horrified others, and became

01:15:54.100 --> 01:15:58.539
a symbol of human ingenuity pushed to its emotional

01:15:58.539 --> 01:16:05.579
limits. Years later, after Dr. Mark Knott's own

01:16:05.579 --> 01:16:09.319
death, he joined his wife in the same experimental

01:16:09.319 --> 01:16:20.170
preservation system. Both bodies were a shared

01:16:20.170 --> 01:16:25.369
desire to defy mortality. But the dream faltered.

01:16:26.989 --> 01:16:31.369
A malfunction in the cooling system thwarted

01:16:31.369 --> 01:17:10.079
the process, leaving the ambitious hope that

01:17:10.079 --> 01:17:13.539
was a good one that was good and uh i mean they

01:17:13.539 --> 01:17:16.539
do have people cryogenically frozen all the time

01:17:16.539 --> 01:17:20.300
now in hopes like whatever if the disease or

01:17:20.300 --> 01:17:22.960
just old age in hopes of the fountain of youth

01:17:22.960 --> 01:17:25.640
that they discover it and then if they do they

01:17:25.640 --> 01:17:30.340
are to thaw them out and try to you know try

01:17:30.340 --> 01:17:33.380
to fix them bring them to life or whatever you

01:17:33.380 --> 01:18:19.329
know so All right, go ahead, Rob. He is so thoughtful.

01:18:21.970 --> 01:18:33.010
Oh, my God, is he? Shit. Was that it? That was

01:18:33.010 --> 01:18:37.989
it on that one. Here, have my penis. Save the

01:18:37.989 --> 01:18:42.130
world. Yeah, high -speed pursuit. He cuts his

01:18:42.130 --> 01:18:44.649
penis off and throws it at him. This will do

01:18:44.649 --> 01:18:47.079
it. This will do it. This will save the world.

01:18:47.159 --> 01:18:53.819
Watch this. Okay. Since that was so short, let's

01:18:53.819 --> 01:19:41.350
go in one last time. How did it look? About as

01:19:41.350 --> 01:19:43.989
good as you could expect, we'll put it that way.

01:19:44.010 --> 01:19:47.329
That bad? Okay. She was a beautiful girl to begin

01:19:47.329 --> 01:19:50.970
with. But, yeah, I mean, they did what they could

01:19:50.970 --> 01:19:55.130
to try to make her look normal. I mean, there's

01:19:55.130 --> 01:19:57.069
always going to be scholars on something like

01:19:57.069 --> 01:19:59.470
that. Well, yeah, I mean, she essentially blew

01:19:59.470 --> 01:20:06.930
her face off. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Okay. Was

01:20:06.930 --> 01:20:10.569
that it? Yeah, that's it for tonight. Okay. All

01:20:10.569 --> 01:20:12.670
right. Thank you, Rob. That was a great bag of

01:20:12.670 --> 01:20:14.890
garbage. We always love your garbage. Thank you.

01:20:15.850 --> 01:20:17.649
Let's take our second break, and then I got a

01:20:17.649 --> 01:20:20.029
little story I want to go into. That sound like

01:20:20.029 --> 01:20:23.430
what we want to do? Sounds good to me. All right.

01:20:23.470 --> 01:20:27.600
We'll be right back. It's kind of like the same

01:20:27.600 --> 01:20:30.960
trajectory as Jim Olsen. Yeah. Who was never

01:20:30.960 --> 01:20:33.640
really destined to be a long -term rock star.

01:20:33.819 --> 01:20:35.699
He was kind of... He didn't really want it. It

01:20:35.699 --> 01:20:38.399
was torture. He was like... He didn't want the

01:20:38.399 --> 01:20:40.899
fame, the publicity, the big crowds. He was trying

01:20:40.899 --> 01:20:43.100
to get his message out, and he was good with

01:20:43.100 --> 01:20:45.279
that. Do you know who Jim Carson's father was?

01:20:45.640 --> 01:20:48.439
Who? He was the Navy Admiral, wasn't he? Do you

01:20:48.439 --> 01:20:51.340
know which mission he was in? No. The Gulf of

01:20:51.340 --> 01:20:53.640
Tonkin, which is what brought us into the Vietnam

01:20:53.640 --> 01:20:56.520
War. Wow. Do you know when the Gulf of Tonkin

01:20:56.520 --> 01:21:02.039
commission ended? As it ended? It ended. Do you

01:21:02.039 --> 01:21:05.500
know which day it ended? The day Jim Morrison

01:21:05.500 --> 01:21:09.539
died. No shit. Oh, by the way, we're doing a

01:21:09.539 --> 01:21:11.920
podcast, okay? Just letting you know. What's

01:21:11.920 --> 01:21:13.859
your name? Brandon. Brandon, nice to meet you.

01:21:13.859 --> 01:21:15.560
I'm Mark. This is Christopher. Yeah, absolutely.

01:21:15.779 --> 01:21:18.319
He's obviously, like the whole 60s movement,

01:21:18.420 --> 01:21:21.159
the entire countercultural thing, the entire

01:21:21.159 --> 01:21:24.770
CIA. Oh, yeah. No kidding. There's a documentary

01:21:24.770 --> 01:21:28.350
on how the CIA introduced drugs, specifically

01:21:28.350 --> 01:21:31.109
hallucinogens, into the pop music to try to control

01:21:31.109 --> 01:21:33.250
it. Oh, no, I didn't know that. To try to wipe

01:21:33.250 --> 01:21:35.510
out the protest part of it. Right, but if you

01:21:35.510 --> 01:21:37.630
look at it, the whole movement was specifically

01:21:37.630 --> 01:21:41.109
to get the anti -war crowd into deadheads. And

01:21:41.109 --> 01:21:44.050
so they infiltrated everyone with drugs, and

01:21:44.050 --> 01:21:47.970
they put on Woodstock. And if you look at the

01:21:47.970 --> 01:21:50.729
paternal lineages of most of the popular culture,

01:21:50.770 --> 01:21:53.539
music at that time... time. Mamas and the Papas,

01:21:53.539 --> 01:21:56.479
Jimi Hendrix. A lot of military parents. All

01:21:56.479 --> 01:21:59.060
military intelligence parents. Holy shit. Wow.

01:22:00.640 --> 01:22:02.779
It's pretty ridiculous. That was kind of a warm

01:22:02.779 --> 01:22:06.180
-up for, what was it, the 80s, when the CIA sold

01:22:06.180 --> 01:22:11.840
crack to Farsi. Yeah, I mean, ever since JFK

01:22:11.840 --> 01:22:13.859
was assassinated, the CIA has been running the

01:22:13.859 --> 01:22:17.119
world. Now, what's your opinion on that, if you

01:22:17.119 --> 01:22:20.630
have a minute? I mean, well, the kill shot was

01:22:20.630 --> 01:22:22.689
obviously done by the driver of the car, which

01:22:22.689 --> 01:22:24.590
is why Jackie Onassis crawled out of a moving

01:22:24.590 --> 01:22:26.729
vehicle while there were snipers present, because

01:22:26.729 --> 01:22:28.670
there wouldn't be any other explanation to crawl

01:22:28.670 --> 01:22:30.869
out of a moving vehicle with snipers unless the

01:22:30.869 --> 01:22:32.930
shooter was in the car. That makes perfectly

01:22:32.930 --> 01:22:34.869
great sense, doesn't it? Yeah, so it's not like

01:22:34.869 --> 01:22:36.630
some guy in the gutter or anything. It was the

01:22:36.630 --> 01:22:39.489
driver with the pistol. It wasn't the guy in

01:22:39.489 --> 01:22:42.130
the grassy knoll. No, no, no, no. It was the

01:22:42.130 --> 01:22:44.630
fucking driver. No, they created these theories

01:22:44.630 --> 01:22:48.399
to throw everybody off, you know? And again,

01:22:48.939 --> 01:22:51.199
the whole point was for, was it J. Edgar Hoover

01:22:51.199 --> 01:22:56.340
who became the CIA director? No, he was FBI.

01:22:56.739 --> 01:22:59.420
Was it FBI director? No, J. Edgar Hoover was

01:22:59.420 --> 01:23:04.600
FBI director. Who was CIA then? I'm not sure

01:23:04.600 --> 01:23:09.340
exactly, but again, it's a giant play. Every

01:23:09.340 --> 01:23:12.779
president is selected. They're not elected. We

01:23:12.779 --> 01:23:15.119
agree 100%. Are you familiar with the fact that

01:23:15.119 --> 01:23:17.199
every president, except for the eighth president,

01:23:17.260 --> 01:23:19.720
Mark Van Buren, is related by blood to the same

01:23:19.720 --> 01:23:21.560
man? I've heard that, but I didn't know that

01:23:21.560 --> 01:23:24.100
was true. His name is John Lackland Plantagenet,

01:23:24.119 --> 01:23:27.220
and he signed the Magna Carta. So every single,

01:23:27.359 --> 01:23:31.380
every single U .S. president. I'm related to

01:23:31.380 --> 01:23:35.119
King John. How come I'm not president? You're

01:23:35.119 --> 01:23:37.680
not evil enough. Yeah, you have to fall into

01:23:37.680 --> 01:23:40.340
it. You have to be a 33rd degree. A 33rd, yeah,

01:23:40.380 --> 01:23:44.220
I do know what you're talking about there. You

01:23:44.220 --> 01:23:46.479
don't want to lose that. Glad I didn't. I thought

01:23:46.479 --> 01:23:48.880
I just stuck around and talked. You know, this

01:23:48.880 --> 01:23:51.239
is, I told you this is a place to do a podcast.

01:23:51.520 --> 01:23:53.340
This is. The most interesting people show up

01:23:53.340 --> 01:23:55.600
here. Yeah, man, it's really interesting. If

01:23:55.600 --> 01:23:57.300
you look into, another thing you should really

01:23:57.300 --> 01:24:02.199
look into is, well, obviously the whole counterculture

01:24:02.199 --> 01:24:04.920
movement thing was supposed to be started in...

01:24:05.130 --> 01:24:08.170
in San Francisco, but the real actual beginning

01:24:08.170 --> 01:24:11.130
of it started in Laurel Canyon in Los Angeles.

01:24:11.909 --> 01:24:16.250
The Air Force had a building in Laurel Canyon,

01:24:16.510 --> 01:24:19.630
which is allegedly where they filmed the moon

01:24:19.630 --> 01:24:23.510
landing, Stanley Cooper directed. But it's, Jared

01:24:23.510 --> 01:24:26.699
Leto used to live there, it's called... God,

01:24:26.739 --> 01:24:29.060
what is it called? I'm blanking on the name of

01:24:29.060 --> 01:24:32.500
the building. You've heard of the Wonderland

01:24:32.500 --> 01:24:35.960
murders, right? Yeah. It's associated with the

01:24:35.960 --> 01:24:37.960
Wonderland murders. It's right next door. And

01:24:37.960 --> 01:24:40.439
the murders happened on the anniversary of the

01:24:40.439 --> 01:24:44.699
Air Force filming location. No kidding. Laurel

01:24:44.699 --> 01:24:46.939
Canyon is where the Manson murders took place,

01:24:47.079 --> 01:24:52.140
I think? Laurel Canyon is related to that. Yes,

01:24:52.159 --> 01:24:54.020
that's where the murders took place, the Sharon

01:24:54.020 --> 01:24:58.340
Tate murders. Because that's where the record

01:24:58.340 --> 01:25:01.439
producer used to live, and then he moved. Correct.

01:25:01.539 --> 01:25:04.800
So he had the layout of the building because

01:25:04.800 --> 01:25:07.420
he was there before when the record producer...

01:25:07.420 --> 01:25:09.340
But I don't believe that's the actual motivation

01:25:09.340 --> 01:25:12.020
for why he targeted that particular place. Oh

01:25:12.020 --> 01:25:14.060
no, go ahead, by all means. Well, because again,

01:25:14.159 --> 01:25:17.380
you have to realize that the entire anti -war

01:25:17.380 --> 01:25:20.840
crowd... the military intelligence attempting

01:25:20.840 --> 01:25:24.279
to turn them into murderous deadheads. That's

01:25:24.279 --> 01:25:28.319
why they put him forth with those things. He

01:25:28.319 --> 01:25:31.500
didn't kill anyone. No, he didn't. They had a

01:25:31.500 --> 01:25:37.640
hard time. Yeah, that whole Vincent Bugliosi

01:25:37.640 --> 01:25:40.079
helter -skelter theory. Yeah, exactly. Utter

01:25:40.079 --> 01:25:44.220
bullshit. Absolute utter bullshit. And Manson

01:25:44.220 --> 01:25:48.340
was quoted as saying... I am okay if you convict

01:25:48.340 --> 01:25:51.979
me, but convict me for the right reasons. Not

01:25:51.979 --> 01:25:55.180
this stupid helter -skelter crap. Convict me

01:25:55.180 --> 01:25:57.840
for the real reasons. Because, yeah, he didn't

01:25:57.840 --> 01:26:00.300
kill anyone. But, again, I believe he was put

01:26:00.300 --> 01:26:02.720
in that place because of who he knew. Because

01:26:02.720 --> 01:26:05.560
he had a lot of friends. Oh, he had a bunch of

01:26:05.560 --> 01:26:08.279
influential friends. He was a pretty good musician,

01:26:08.380 --> 01:26:11.000
but he couldn't get a record deal. So many people

01:26:11.000 --> 01:26:12.479
came in and out. What was the deal with him and

01:26:12.479 --> 01:26:16.729
the Beach Boys? What was the deal between him

01:26:16.729 --> 01:26:18.810
and the Beach Boys? The Beach Boys tried to get

01:26:18.810 --> 01:26:21.289
him a recording deal. We're going to introduce

01:26:21.289 --> 01:26:26.109
him to, what was the guy's name? Dennis O 'Leary?

01:26:27.909 --> 01:26:33.170
Mitchell? I'll be right back, actually. But yeah,

01:26:33.329 --> 01:26:36.630
I just got all the deliveries. Oh, okay. Check

01:26:36.630 --> 01:26:38.470
it out, though. I just want to finish that one

01:26:38.470 --> 01:26:43.560
thought. To make all the hippies look like lunatics,

01:26:43.619 --> 01:26:46.779
that's obviously the purpose of the Manson trial.

01:26:48.640 --> 01:26:52.159
And obviously Jim Horst's father was running

01:26:52.159 --> 01:26:53.979
the Gulf of Tonkin, setting up the Vietnam War,

01:26:54.119 --> 01:26:57.180
and decommissioned on the same day that he died.

01:26:59.199 --> 01:27:02.800
The Big Blue Blast, Timothy Leary, the Deadheads,

01:27:03.039 --> 01:27:08.020
that whole acid movement, all CIA direct connections.

01:27:09.819 --> 01:27:12.739
that the entire counterculture in and of itself

01:27:12.739 --> 01:27:16.260
was manufactured for sure. That would tend to

01:27:16.260 --> 01:27:21.539
explain why it seemed so easily successful. Right,

01:27:21.539 --> 01:27:23.359
yeah, absolutely. It didn't go into a lot of

01:27:23.359 --> 01:27:27.119
serious opposition until it was time for it to

01:27:27.119 --> 01:27:31.239
run. That's a great point. And even though some

01:27:31.239 --> 01:27:34.659
of those guys are brilliant, they still got someone

01:27:34.659 --> 01:27:36.640
in their back pocket, you know what I mean? I

01:27:36.640 --> 01:27:41.880
love... What's his name? Not to be weird, but

01:27:41.880 --> 01:27:46.899
the other one is McKenna, Terrence McKenna. I

01:27:46.899 --> 01:27:49.420
love Terrence McKenna's work, but like, you know,

01:27:49.439 --> 01:27:55.239
who's funding his discourses, you know? And it's

01:27:55.239 --> 01:27:57.239
just, yeah, it's just pretty, it's pretty remarkable.

01:27:58.020 --> 01:28:01.789
But like, I gotta... I remember the name. I'm

01:28:01.789 --> 01:28:04.329
going to look up the name of the Air Force building

01:28:04.329 --> 01:28:07.390
in Laurel Canyon from which all of this manifested

01:28:07.390 --> 01:28:10.409
from. Because, obviously, they tried to play

01:28:10.409 --> 01:28:12.449
it as, like, Kate Ashbury, but that was, like,

01:28:12.449 --> 01:28:16.170
some Jerry Garcia, like, made -up bullshit for

01:28:16.170 --> 01:28:21.250
the narrative to be pushed. Yeah. And let me

01:28:21.250 --> 01:28:23.130
just drop this video. Okay. All right. Cool.

01:28:23.569 --> 01:28:27.189
It's amazing. Isn't it? I have seen Ed's documentary,

01:28:27.550 --> 01:28:30.789
it's either on Amazon Prime or Netflix, but it's

01:28:30.789 --> 01:28:37.609
CIA drugs counterculture movement. And I haven't

01:28:37.609 --> 01:28:41.609
watched it yet, but it lays out how it was orchestrated

01:28:41.609 --> 01:28:45.869
to control them. Imagine the panic in Washington

01:28:45.869 --> 01:28:48.810
where all these students rise up and they're

01:28:48.810 --> 01:28:54.350
making... Yeah, and the thing is, is at first

01:28:54.350 --> 01:28:57.829
they tried to discredit them. And like, oh, you

01:28:57.829 --> 01:29:00.289
know, those crazy drug -taking hippies. But then

01:29:00.289 --> 01:29:01.829
when that didn't work, they had to go to different

01:29:01.829 --> 01:29:04.310
actions. Yeah, they couldn't just say, well,

01:29:04.310 --> 01:29:05.930
they're all potheads, hey, you can't trust a

01:29:05.930 --> 01:29:08.470
pothead. Well, they made sense. And they were

01:29:08.470 --> 01:29:11.090
telling the truth. Actually, people didn't give

01:29:11.090 --> 01:29:13.670
a shit whether they were potheads or not. They're

01:29:13.670 --> 01:29:15.710
like, these guys make more sense than you guys

01:29:15.710 --> 01:29:19.100
do. But think about it, in the 60s, 20 years

01:29:19.100 --> 01:29:23.640
earlier, pot was not legal, but very widespread.

01:29:24.140 --> 01:29:28.159
20 years before Madden, it was legal. So, you

01:29:28.159 --> 01:29:30.720
know, why would people get bent all of a sudden

01:29:30.720 --> 01:29:33.979
over people smoking pot? Oh, because movies like

01:29:33.979 --> 01:29:36.359
Reaper Madness. Yeah, Reaper Madness was a big

01:29:36.359 --> 01:29:39.319
one. Yeah, that was all William Randolph Curtis.

01:29:39.699 --> 01:29:43.380
Yeah, he wanted his timber holdings to retain

01:29:43.380 --> 01:29:46.119
their value so he could destroy the possibility

01:29:46.119 --> 01:29:51.439
of him. And you saw Henry Ford's hemp car, right?

01:29:51.539 --> 01:29:53.600
Have you seen that? Yeah. I mean, an entirely

01:29:53.600 --> 01:29:58.000
hemp plastic vehicle that ran on hemp oil. And

01:29:58.000 --> 01:30:00.939
it was in the 30s. So, like, they were obviously,

01:30:01.079 --> 01:30:04.500
they made gasoline obsolete at that time. Well,

01:30:04.539 --> 01:30:06.899
the original diesel engine was designed around

01:30:06.899 --> 01:30:12.779
bio -diesel. It was peanut oil, right? It was

01:30:12.779 --> 01:30:14.659
supposed to be something that was alternative

01:30:14.659 --> 01:30:17.699
to petroleum. As a matter of fact, you can run

01:30:17.699 --> 01:30:20.100
a car on hydrogen. They have hydrogen cars. Yeah,

01:30:20.100 --> 01:30:22.699
well, hydrogen on demand is a separate type of

01:30:22.699 --> 01:30:25.100
hydrogen, which is actually what the CIA has

01:30:25.100 --> 01:30:27.420
been murdering inventors about over the last

01:30:27.420 --> 01:30:30.340
20, 30 years. Some guy made a water -powered

01:30:30.340 --> 01:30:34.520
buggy, and he was poisoned during a meeting with

01:30:34.520 --> 01:30:37.500
some, like, I forget which bureau, but it was

01:30:37.500 --> 01:30:41.569
an agency of... America and he was poisoned he

01:30:41.569 --> 01:30:43.529
ran out into the parking lot stream diving poison

01:30:43.529 --> 01:30:47.949
then he died he was the one who invented a hydrolysis

01:30:47.949 --> 01:30:52.090
mechanism that could split water into hydrogen

01:30:52.090 --> 01:30:55.550
and oxygen gas and then he set up a series of

01:30:55.550 --> 01:30:57.449
bubblers so it didn't accumulate too much in

01:30:57.449 --> 01:31:00.960
the engine to cause like And so that's basically

01:31:00.960 --> 01:31:03.939
all it is. You make electrolysis plates, you

01:31:03.939 --> 01:31:05.939
run water through it, you split the molecules

01:31:05.939 --> 01:31:11.399
into hydrogen and oxygen gas, and then you burn

01:31:11.399 --> 01:31:13.359
the hydrogen and oxygen gas. But you only make

01:31:13.359 --> 01:31:15.939
as much gas as you need to propel the vehicle,

01:31:16.079 --> 01:31:17.140
so you don't have an accumulation. Yeah, you

01:31:17.140 --> 01:31:18.699
don't have an accumulation. You can actually

01:31:18.699 --> 01:31:21.399
run that experiment yourself. My oldest brother

01:31:21.399 --> 01:31:25.300
did that. He put two wires down into some water

01:31:25.300 --> 01:31:27.810
and sealed a jar and then he ran a current. through

01:31:27.810 --> 01:31:30.010
those wires yeah it's called a hoffman apparatus

01:31:30.010 --> 01:31:33.350
and they just he just waited and and you know

01:31:33.350 --> 01:31:35.369
each day i'd look at it the water level had gone

01:31:35.369 --> 01:31:38.470
down a little bit but the water wasn't leaving

01:31:38.470 --> 01:31:40.930
the jar it was just turning into hydrogen and

01:31:40.930 --> 01:31:43.250
oxygen free hydrogen free oxygen that's pretty

01:31:43.250 --> 01:31:45.430
freaking cool burned out that little motor because

01:31:45.430 --> 01:31:47.909
it wasn't designed for that but you can get like

01:31:47.909 --> 01:31:50.909
a hundred miles to the gallon of water wow yeah

01:31:50.909 --> 01:31:52.430
that's how powerful it is that's why they don't

01:31:52.430 --> 01:31:54.210
want you to hear about it oh yeah another cool

01:31:54.210 --> 01:31:57.229
thing is it's water Yeah, exactly. And you can

01:31:57.229 --> 01:32:00.010
also use seawater because it needs an electrolyte

01:32:00.010 --> 01:32:02.609
anyway. So you don't even have to desalinate

01:32:02.609 --> 01:32:05.890
it. It's kind of amazing. But of course, the

01:32:05.890 --> 01:32:10.170
Rockefeller Petrol Standard Oil Cabal couldn't

01:32:10.170 --> 01:32:13.909
longer it. It was like, you know, enforcing their...

01:32:13.909 --> 01:32:17.770
Well, they demonized it. Oh, that doesn't work.

01:32:18.029 --> 01:32:21.890
The cigarette industry has been suppressing the

01:32:21.890 --> 01:32:24.079
marijuana industry for decades. Oh, God, yeah,

01:32:24.119 --> 01:32:26.079
well, they started out with their Reefer Madness

01:32:26.079 --> 01:32:28.800
stuff, and, you know, man, you know, how absurd

01:32:28.800 --> 01:32:33.199
that, well, if you, if a black man smokes a pot,

01:32:33.319 --> 01:32:35.180
he's going to come rape your white dog. What

01:32:35.180 --> 01:32:38.739
a, what a fucked up premise this is. Stupid,

01:32:38.939 --> 01:32:43.420
racist, ignorant. Yeah. I mean, yeah, the idea

01:32:43.420 --> 01:32:45.960
of just, like, anything from nature being outlawed

01:32:45.960 --> 01:32:49.659
is... It is, it's absurd, isn't it? Especially

01:32:49.659 --> 01:32:52.060
when you have nature pushed on everybody right

01:32:52.060 --> 01:32:56.520
now. Everything they do is organic and fresh

01:32:56.520 --> 01:33:00.739
and local. I like Carlos Santana's viewpoint

01:33:00.739 --> 01:33:07.100
on that. Anything from nature, he's okay taking.

01:33:07.340 --> 01:33:12.079
Like peyote, mescaline. When it gets bad is when

01:33:12.079 --> 01:33:15.560
man screws with it. created things like LSD,

01:33:15.720 --> 01:33:20.659
we'll touch it. Yeah, heroin has been so processed,

01:33:20.979 --> 01:33:24.239
cocaine has been so heavily processed, chemically,

01:33:24.300 --> 01:33:27.680
yeah. So, you know, if I can go pick a plant,

01:33:27.840 --> 01:33:31.899
that's fine. That's as far as I want to go. Okay,

01:33:32.939 --> 01:33:36.420
so it's called Lookout Mountain Laboratory. Okay,

01:33:36.439 --> 01:33:41.000
and it became operational exactly 666 weeks and

01:33:41.000 --> 01:33:43.760
6 days after the founding of the Tavistock Institute

01:33:43.760 --> 01:33:47.680
and 3 ,303 days before the launch of Apollo 11.

01:33:47.920 --> 01:33:51.760
And this is the alleged to be the filming location

01:33:51.760 --> 01:33:55.180
of Stanley Kubrick's version of the moon landing.

01:33:55.619 --> 01:34:02.399
And it's the Wonderland murders happened on the

01:34:02.399 --> 01:34:05.460
anniversary of... this building it happened on

01:34:05.460 --> 01:34:10.380
september 20th and um there's some wonderland

01:34:10.380 --> 01:34:13.779
connections in there too you know that from all

01:34:13.779 --> 01:34:16.020
the pop shows if you have time i want to expand

01:34:16.020 --> 01:34:17.939
on a couple of things i want to get your version

01:34:17.939 --> 01:34:20.039
on this because you're very well read and you

01:34:20.039 --> 01:34:22.319
have a wide mind you know you're accepting a

01:34:22.319 --> 01:34:25.520
lot of different ideas the solution to it all

01:34:25.520 --> 01:34:27.279
that holds everything together seems to be this

01:34:27.279 --> 01:34:30.300
thing called gematria And Gematria is basically

01:34:30.300 --> 01:34:33.619
a secret language hidden within language in which

01:34:33.619 --> 01:34:38.640
an alphanumeric, a numerical value to a word

01:34:38.640 --> 01:34:41.380
is established based on the arrangement of letters.

01:34:41.680 --> 01:34:44.100
So A is the first letter of the alphabet, so

01:34:44.100 --> 01:34:47.279
it's 1. Z is the last letter of the alphabet,

01:34:47.420 --> 01:34:51.220
so it's number 26. Then you add the letters and

01:34:51.220 --> 01:34:53.220
the words together and you get a numerical value.

01:34:53.460 --> 01:34:55.640
Yeah, because everything is numerology. Exactly.

01:34:55.720 --> 01:34:58.260
And then so what they do is they take the value

01:34:58.260 --> 01:35:01.340
of these words and then they correlate them with

01:35:01.340 --> 01:35:04.300
the distance between dates in the Gregorian calendar.

01:35:04.859 --> 01:35:11.279
So for instance, like... One example, the word

01:35:11.279 --> 01:35:16.060
earthquake equals 107, okay? Okay. And this company

01:35:16.060 --> 01:35:19.600
named Robin Hood Markets, it's founded in the

01:35:19.600 --> 01:35:22.539
San Francisco Bay Area. It was founded on the

01:35:22.539 --> 01:35:28.439
anniversary of the San Francisco, the 1906 San

01:35:28.439 --> 01:35:31.560
Francisco earthquake. Is this the one that has

01:35:31.560 --> 01:35:33.380
the app and all that? Yeah, yeah, Robin Hood,

01:35:33.420 --> 01:35:34.880
the one that's in the news recently. Yes, yeah.

01:35:34.979 --> 01:35:37.140
The Jamie Short Sweet stuff and all that. So

01:35:37.140 --> 01:35:40.739
Robin Hood is actually... It was founded on the

01:35:40.739 --> 01:35:44.199
107th anniversary of the earthquake in San Francisco,

01:35:44.319 --> 01:35:46.920
and the word earthquake was 107. Okay, now what's

01:35:46.920 --> 01:35:49.979
your opinion on why they would do that? Well,

01:35:50.079 --> 01:35:52.840
I mean, that's a much larger kind of disassociated

01:35:52.840 --> 01:35:55.260
thread from what we're talking about in relation

01:35:55.260 --> 01:35:58.939
to the Golden Gate Bridge, and it's like hidden

01:35:58.939 --> 01:36:00.720
meanings. But again, the reason why they're doing

01:36:00.720 --> 01:36:05.020
these things in sequence and in numerical order

01:36:05.020 --> 01:36:09.250
has to do with... I mean, the creation of the

01:36:09.250 --> 01:36:11.729
universe, it goes back to, it's allegedly like,

01:36:11.750 --> 01:36:16.050
you know, God created the word, and then he said,

01:36:16.109 --> 01:36:18.829
let there be light. So the word being the foundation

01:36:18.829 --> 01:36:23.609
to the physical reality, okay, is what is referenced

01:36:23.609 --> 01:36:25.409
here. It's the same stuff that they're doing

01:36:25.409 --> 01:36:27.890
when they're reading the Torah, and they're trying

01:36:27.890 --> 01:36:30.430
to come up with the numerical calculations of

01:36:30.430 --> 01:36:33.270
the Torah, because it's more regularly known

01:36:33.270 --> 01:36:36.449
in Hebrew that a letter is equal to a number.

01:36:36.750 --> 01:36:39.170
like it's it's already identified but in english

01:36:39.170 --> 01:36:42.829
it's been like suppressed heavily and um but

01:36:42.829 --> 01:36:45.149
like many people talk about it like manly p hall

01:36:45.149 --> 01:36:49.529
mentions it um a lot of people in theosophical

01:36:49.529 --> 01:36:52.210
society people who understand like the the um

01:36:52.210 --> 01:36:54.010
the bridging of the gaps between science and

01:36:54.010 --> 01:36:56.189
spirituality the reason they're doing it is because

01:36:56.189 --> 01:36:59.949
of the nature of this universe and how it is

01:36:59.949 --> 01:37:03.430
numerically fashioned and through the word of

01:37:03.430 --> 01:37:06.149
God. And that's what they're trying to connect

01:37:06.149 --> 01:37:09.750
with. They're trying to do the work of God, but

01:37:09.750 --> 01:37:12.130
they're inverting it. I get what you're saying.

01:37:12.149 --> 01:37:14.489
They're inverting the principles. And I've heard

01:37:14.489 --> 01:37:17.229
stuff along the lines, not quite what you're

01:37:17.229 --> 01:37:19.409
going into, but I've heard this for a long time

01:37:19.409 --> 01:37:22.130
about how they try to replicate it and break

01:37:22.130 --> 01:37:25.189
everything down into numbers. Even commercials

01:37:25.189 --> 01:37:29.640
on TV use numbers to sell. whether it's flashing

01:37:29.640 --> 01:37:32.819
or what they say according to their value. Are

01:37:32.819 --> 01:37:34.279
you familiar with what I'm talking about? Yes,

01:37:34.300 --> 01:37:37.300
I am. I follow it religiously. They call it something.

01:37:39.260 --> 01:37:41.420
There's a term that they use regularly in it

01:37:41.420 --> 01:37:44.319
that they put into commercials and even TV shows.

01:37:44.579 --> 01:37:46.560
You know, like product placement. Say this is

01:37:46.560 --> 01:37:49.880
a Pepsi cup, okay? Like, let's say it's the new

01:37:49.880 --> 01:37:53.020
Batman movie coming out. Pepsi pays them a lot

01:37:53.020 --> 01:37:56.239
of money to have this cup next to Batman. But

01:37:56.239 --> 01:37:58.800
they do it subliminally. without you knowing

01:37:58.800 --> 01:38:02.779
it with flashes numbers everything and all anyone

01:38:02.779 --> 01:38:05.020
that could decode it can tell you what it's actually

01:38:05.020 --> 01:38:07.420
trying to get across to you yeah and if you learn

01:38:07.420 --> 01:38:10.479
gematria you can see that pretty much every major

01:38:10.479 --> 01:38:13.840
established institution uses this code in order

01:38:13.840 --> 01:38:17.880
to conduct their schedules and because they're

01:38:17.880 --> 01:38:20.119
trying to match everything up with like the greater

01:38:20.119 --> 01:38:22.899
cosmos yeah like they're trying to yeah exactly

01:38:22.899 --> 01:38:24.659
yeah because that's what creates manifestation

01:38:24.659 --> 01:38:28.079
if you're in in phase with the greater cosmos

01:38:28.079 --> 01:38:32.300
then you literally become identical to it energetically

01:38:32.300 --> 01:38:34.439
well as i was going to say earlier with all the

01:38:34.439 --> 01:38:37.260
pop shows i watched anniversary dates are a big

01:38:37.260 --> 01:38:39.979
deal i mean that's how they catch a lot of criminals

01:38:39.979 --> 01:38:44.020
in real life because yeah are a big deal and

01:38:44.020 --> 01:38:47.680
they mean a lot to a lot of people Yes. So someone

01:38:47.680 --> 01:38:50.119
who would dismiss that as, oh, anniversary day

01:38:50.119 --> 01:38:53.739
is just coincidence. Well, we live in a society

01:38:53.739 --> 01:38:56.439
that every day is an anniversary anyhow. It's

01:38:56.439 --> 01:38:59.060
like you get with your girlfriend or significant

01:38:59.060 --> 01:39:01.159
other or whatever. The time you meet them is

01:39:01.159 --> 01:39:03.500
an anniversary. The time you started dating is

01:39:03.500 --> 01:39:06.560
an anniversary. The time you propose is an anniversary.

01:39:07.069 --> 01:39:09.829
The time you get married is an anniversary. Anniversary

01:39:09.829 --> 01:39:12.170
of someone's death. Anniversary of God's death.

01:39:12.270 --> 01:39:14.430
Here's Jim Morrison as an example. This is a

01:39:14.430 --> 01:39:16.770
decode done by someone on Twitter by the name

01:39:16.770 --> 01:39:20.050
of Brother Berg. His handle is ExtraCapsa, and

01:39:20.050 --> 01:39:23.270
this is his work. But so for Jim Morrison as

01:39:23.270 --> 01:39:27.189
an example, he was 330 months, 3 weeks, and 3

01:39:27.189 --> 01:39:29.989
days old on his final night alive, which was

01:39:29.989 --> 01:39:32.329
exactly 3 months and 3 weeks after he moved to

01:39:32.329 --> 01:39:35.850
Paris. and 33 months, 3 weeks, and 3 days before

01:39:35.850 --> 01:39:37.729
the death of his girlfriend, who found him in

01:39:37.729 --> 01:39:41.289
the bathtub. And she didn't really find him in

01:39:41.289 --> 01:39:44.770
the bathtub. Yeah, yeah. Well, the bathtub's

01:39:44.770 --> 01:39:46.810
a very interesting thing, too. I mean, a lot

01:39:46.810 --> 01:39:48.449
of people have died in bathtubs, like Whitney

01:39:48.449 --> 01:39:50.789
Houston died in a bathtub. Elvis was a shitter,

01:39:50.810 --> 01:39:52.630
though, wasn't he? Yeah, he was a shitter, definitely,

01:39:52.890 --> 01:39:56.270
yeah. Well, he was a bad dude. Yeah, he clogged

01:39:56.270 --> 01:39:58.300
him up. Yeah, it was a bathtub. There is a symbol

01:39:58.300 --> 01:40:00.199
behind the bathtub thing. There definitely is.

01:40:00.260 --> 01:40:02.199
I'm not 100 % on it. Come on, we all know he

01:40:02.199 --> 01:40:03.960
was trying to rub one out. That's how he died.

01:40:04.100 --> 01:40:06.199
Come on. Well, there's also a lot of weird deaths

01:40:06.199 --> 01:40:08.619
recently, too, of people being hanged on their

01:40:08.619 --> 01:40:13.159
own doorknobs. Yes. I mean, from Epstein. Well,

01:40:14.039 --> 01:40:19.210
Epstein wasn't a doorknob. Epstein was allegedly...

01:40:19.210 --> 01:40:21.529
But even then, there was no doorknob where he

01:40:21.529 --> 01:40:23.789
was. But you know what I'm saying? How the fuck

01:40:23.789 --> 01:40:25.970
does that happen? It doesn't. Michael Hutchins

01:40:25.970 --> 01:40:28.850
from NXS. Oh, he was one of the first ones. David

01:40:28.850 --> 01:40:31.689
Carradine. Yes, David Carradine. And then a lot

01:40:31.689 --> 01:40:34.770
of those guys like Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain

01:40:34.770 --> 01:40:38.869
and Chris Cornell. I'm pretty sure they were

01:40:38.869 --> 01:40:41.729
all hung by their doorknob. With a black tie.

01:40:42.440 --> 01:40:45.399
or a black piece of cloth from the doorknob.

01:40:45.399 --> 01:40:48.000
Sounds like Rachel. What is a symbol? Yeah, so.

01:40:48.220 --> 01:40:50.779
But, I mean, that goes, the way, if you follow

01:40:50.779 --> 01:40:53.920
this, because, like, again, Gematria isn't just,

01:40:53.960 --> 01:40:57.819
like, it's every institution. It's how they script

01:40:57.819 --> 01:41:00.500
sports, for instance. It's how all Masonic sports

01:41:00.500 --> 01:41:03.819
are scripted. Baseball, football, basketball.

01:41:04.520 --> 01:41:10.479
And those are all occulted. astrological rituals

01:41:10.479 --> 01:41:13.859
like basketball for instance represents the ball

01:41:13.859 --> 01:41:16.619
represents pisces which if you look at the basketball

01:41:16.619 --> 01:41:18.460
it has the symbol of pisces on it looks like

01:41:18.460 --> 01:41:21.579
an h it really does and then the symbol for aquarius

01:41:21.579 --> 01:41:24.619
is an urn which is what the hoop is so it represents

01:41:24.619 --> 01:41:27.579
the age of aquarius going into pisces or sorry

01:41:27.579 --> 01:41:30.479
the age of pisces going into the earth and but

01:41:30.479 --> 01:41:32.260
again they're doing it in a way that they're

01:41:32.260 --> 01:41:34.800
two teams with two goals so they never actually

01:41:34.800 --> 01:41:38.899
progress so like It creates a dualistic opposition

01:41:38.899 --> 01:41:43.460
that allows for no progress. And that's exactly

01:41:43.460 --> 01:41:46.680
what sports is all designed for. Football, again,

01:41:46.739 --> 01:41:48.380
the shape of the football is called a vesica

01:41:48.380 --> 01:41:54.119
pisces. It all is like Kabbalistic and astrological

01:41:54.119 --> 01:41:57.560
references that bring everything in. And then

01:41:57.560 --> 01:42:01.319
everything with sports is scripted. Like who's

01:42:01.319 --> 01:42:04.039
traded when and who breaks their leg during what

01:42:04.039 --> 01:42:07.590
game. You know, it's just, it's incredible. Well,

01:42:07.590 --> 01:42:10.109
basketball has been the most notorious because

01:42:10.109 --> 01:42:13.229
it has been admitted that they influence games

01:42:13.229 --> 01:42:15.850
at the very least. Right, and so an interesting

01:42:15.850 --> 01:42:17.930
thing outside of that to bring the basketball

01:42:17.930 --> 01:42:20.470
into the whole death rituals is Kobe Bryant.

01:42:20.689 --> 01:42:23.329
Kobe Bryant died right before the coronavirus

01:42:23.329 --> 01:42:26.069
pandemic, right? Just right before. And he was

01:42:26.069 --> 01:42:30.350
buried in Corona Del Mar. He was. He was, that's

01:42:30.350 --> 01:42:33.569
right. And yeah, there's a ton of shit with Kobe

01:42:33.569 --> 01:42:36.409
Bryant. I can't think of it all right now. Well,

01:42:36.409 --> 01:42:39.329
supposedly he was part of the elitist... He's

01:42:39.329 --> 01:42:41.909
in the Boulay Society. Yes. Most every black

01:42:41.909 --> 01:42:44.409
person that's in the public eye has gone through

01:42:44.409 --> 01:42:45.789
the Boulay Society. Like, what's his name, married

01:42:45.789 --> 01:42:52.829
to... We're hitting maximum recording time. I

01:42:52.829 --> 01:42:56.909
think it's an hour. But, okay, like... Damn it,

01:42:56.909 --> 01:43:01.579
I forgot his name. Joe Camel. Oh, you're talking

01:43:01.579 --> 01:43:04.659
about the goat? Oh, yeah, the goat, too. I'm

01:43:04.659 --> 01:43:06.779
talking about the guy that looks like Joe Campbell

01:43:06.779 --> 01:43:13.140
that is married to Beyonce. It looks like Jay

01:43:13.140 --> 01:43:17.560
-Z. Well, Jay -Z's a good example of what we're

01:43:17.560 --> 01:43:20.260
just talking about. Yeah, 100%. He's always doing

01:43:20.260 --> 01:43:23.880
the symbolism and all that. Yeah, 100%. He's

01:43:23.880 --> 01:43:26.020
really in the face about it. Beyonce's really

01:43:26.020 --> 01:43:28.390
interesting, too, because she has... She's one

01:43:28.390 --> 01:43:31.189
of the few people who has actually claimed that

01:43:31.189 --> 01:43:33.649
the person that she is when she's on stage is

01:43:33.649 --> 01:43:36.109
actually not her, but a demon that possesses

01:43:36.109 --> 01:43:37.890
her. Yes. You know what I mean? There have been

01:43:37.890 --> 01:43:41.090
a lot of performers and musicians coming out

01:43:41.090 --> 01:43:46.090
talking about rampant pedophilia and Satanism.

01:43:46.289 --> 01:43:48.529
Well, what about our government? Well, yeah,

01:43:48.590 --> 01:43:51.949
I mean, that goes back to... Lady Gaga, Macaulay

01:43:51.949 --> 01:43:55.750
Culkin. It goes to its power that it possessed

01:43:55.750 --> 01:43:58.880
by ruining a child. Not killing them, but killing

01:43:58.880 --> 01:44:01.420
them. Well, it has to do with a lot with the

01:44:01.420 --> 01:44:03.899
mechanics of disassociative identity disorder

01:44:03.899 --> 01:44:05.899
primarily because what they're doing is they're

01:44:05.899 --> 01:44:08.579
actually, this is the method by which they create

01:44:08.579 --> 01:44:10.659
mentoring candidates. You just made a little

01:44:10.659 --> 01:44:12.819
bit of sense out of it right there. So what they're

01:44:12.819 --> 01:44:14.500
doing is they're sodomizing children before the

01:44:14.500 --> 01:44:16.840
age of three or five so that they can have an

01:44:16.840 --> 01:44:19.880
electrostatic charge that fractures their brain

01:44:19.880 --> 01:44:22.119
stem and creates multiple personality disorder.

01:44:22.640 --> 01:44:25.020
It's literally using kundalini against a person.

01:44:25.260 --> 01:44:27.819
And it's forcing them into a spiritual experience

01:44:27.819 --> 01:44:30.039
before they're ready for it, which literally

01:44:30.039 --> 01:44:32.739
electrophysiologically shatters their brainstem.

01:44:32.819 --> 01:44:34.460
I've got a question for you real quick because

01:44:34.460 --> 01:44:36.960
I want to get this in on the podcast. Is it satanic?

01:44:37.979 --> 01:44:43.159
Satanic ritual abuse has to do with... Satan

01:44:43.159 --> 01:44:45.939
represents usually like separation, right? Like

01:44:45.939 --> 01:44:48.220
the principality of separating yourself from

01:44:48.220 --> 01:44:52.500
God. Yeah, so I mean, they call it satanic ritual

01:44:52.500 --> 01:44:56.579
abuse. Whether or not all the practitioners are

01:44:56.579 --> 01:44:59.479
worshipping Satan directly, that's up for debate.

01:45:00.140 --> 01:45:01.979
They're doing it for their own reasons. Yeah,

01:45:02.000 --> 01:45:04.239
and again, most of them probably are ignorant,

01:45:04.359 --> 01:45:05.899
and most of them are probably just being told

01:45:05.899 --> 01:45:07.640
to do a certain thing in order to get a certain

01:45:07.640 --> 01:45:10.300
cause and effect. Like, you do this, we'll give

01:45:10.300 --> 01:45:12.079
you this amount of fame, or we'll give you this

01:45:12.079 --> 01:45:14.800
contract for this number of, you know, whatever.

01:45:15.239 --> 01:45:18.079
But a lot of people lose what the satanic elite

01:45:18.079 --> 01:45:22.390
want in their followers. is broken people who

01:45:22.390 --> 01:45:24.229
have their closest thing to their hearts taken

01:45:24.229 --> 01:45:26.050
away from them so that they can maintain control.

01:45:26.329 --> 01:45:31.510
For instance, Eric, who died, right? Yeah, the

01:45:31.510 --> 01:45:33.770
baby. Yeah, exactly. So, like, just stuff like

01:45:33.770 --> 01:45:35.789
that. They take whatever's closest to you in

01:45:35.789 --> 01:45:38.930
order to propagate your fame in their institutions.

01:45:39.970 --> 01:45:44.010
Satan, Luciferian stuff, that's, like, I mean,

01:45:44.029 --> 01:45:49.369
that's more occult. And I don't... I think it's

01:45:49.369 --> 01:45:51.930
completely and utterly real. I do too. In its

01:45:51.930 --> 01:45:54.489
own regard. But it's just the way that people

01:45:54.489 --> 01:45:57.729
are interfacing with it may or may not be entirely.

01:45:58.649 --> 01:46:00.409
Right. There's some people that are just using

01:46:00.409 --> 01:46:02.210
it for their own ends without really believing

01:46:02.210 --> 01:46:05.409
in things. 100%. Everything is inversion. Because

01:46:05.409 --> 01:46:08.210
again, darkness has no creativity. You are currently

01:46:08.210 --> 01:46:11.970
listening to Deep Sky. This is a name we came

01:46:11.970 --> 01:46:14.390
up with this guy because he really doesn't want

01:46:14.390 --> 01:46:18.300
to be identified. Anyhow. He's very entertaining.

01:46:19.020 --> 01:46:21.460
He has a lot of information. He's very intelligent.

01:46:21.800 --> 01:46:24.159
Whether you believe it or not is up to you, but

01:46:24.159 --> 01:46:26.840
there's no doubt the guy's intelligent and he's

01:46:26.840 --> 01:46:29.699
very entertaining. So just like us, enjoy. You

01:46:29.699 --> 01:46:32.199
can unravel it all later, whatever. This sigil

01:46:32.199 --> 01:46:38.260
here of Lucifer connected with Satan overlaid

01:46:38.260 --> 01:46:43.380
on the four Kabbalistic worlds. So this, for

01:46:43.380 --> 01:46:46.140
instance, here, this is the devil tarot card.

01:46:46.759 --> 01:46:50.340
And you notice the geometries here, the horns,

01:46:50.600 --> 01:46:54.079
the staff here, this wing here, this pentagram

01:46:54.079 --> 01:46:56.539
here with the wings here, and the VS, right?

01:46:56.760 --> 01:47:01.159
So if you take the sigils, you get the V from

01:47:01.159 --> 01:47:04.800
the Lucifer, the S from the Satan. You get the

01:47:04.800 --> 01:47:08.479
wing and the staff of fire here and here. You

01:47:08.479 --> 01:47:12.899
get the tail here, tail here. Okay, you have

01:47:12.899 --> 01:47:15.579
the crown, which is, if you look here, it looks

01:47:15.579 --> 01:47:19.319
exactly like a goat. Oh, wow. And the goat face

01:47:19.319 --> 01:47:21.960
right here. Uh -huh. Okay. And you have this,

01:47:21.960 --> 01:47:24.800
like, but there's also this, like, superior being

01:47:24.800 --> 01:47:27.520
where he kind of looks like a jester, where it

01:47:27.520 --> 01:47:31.399
has two eyes, a nose, a mouth here. Wow. That,

01:47:31.539 --> 01:47:34.100
to me, is, like, really awkward to look at because

01:47:34.100 --> 01:47:36.600
it's very similar to something I've seen during

01:47:36.600 --> 01:47:41.079
DMT experiences, which is very trippy. But this

01:47:41.079 --> 01:47:45.380
is the devil card. The devil tarot is using the

01:47:45.380 --> 01:47:47.520
seals. I'm very familiar with it because I know

01:47:47.520 --> 01:47:49.960
people that use the tarot cards. And anyhow,

01:47:50.180 --> 01:47:52.619
they always describe to me the devil card is

01:47:52.619 --> 01:47:55.220
more about vices. What gets in your way, what

01:47:55.220 --> 01:47:59.560
bothers you, which is in stone songs. The devil

01:47:59.560 --> 01:48:01.539
represents the Lord to the gate of matter. So

01:48:01.539 --> 01:48:04.439
really what he's doing is he's the one who decides

01:48:04.439 --> 01:48:07.159
who gets to be real and who doesn't. Oh, okay.

01:48:07.920 --> 01:48:10.760
So the people don't know what the hell they're

01:48:10.760 --> 01:48:12.640
talking about. Yeah, I mean, everything's inverted

01:48:12.640 --> 01:48:14.880
for the most part. So, like, I mean, but again,

01:48:15.000 --> 01:48:17.220
the devil, yeah, Satan is the king of the world.

01:48:17.659 --> 01:48:20.979
And that's what all of the occultists are believing,

01:48:21.100 --> 01:48:23.640
and that's why they worship him, because he's

01:48:23.640 --> 01:48:25.260
actually the king of this realm. Well, yeah,

01:48:25.340 --> 01:48:27.939
if you look at it and you believe it to Scripture,

01:48:28.039 --> 01:48:30.180
this... He is the king of the world. Look at

01:48:30.180 --> 01:48:31.920
everything. You go out there in Kansas City and

01:48:31.920 --> 01:48:33.479
how many people are getting murdered, how many

01:48:33.479 --> 01:48:35.140
people are cheating on other people, how many

01:48:35.140 --> 01:48:37.199
people are backstabbing them, human trafficking.

01:48:37.420 --> 01:48:42.060
This world is shit. Look over there in Ukraine

01:48:42.060 --> 01:48:46.060
right now. And this is the dumbest state in the

01:48:46.060 --> 01:48:48.039
sense that it's the only one that's dumb enough

01:48:48.039 --> 01:48:53.159
to have two federal residence locations. But

01:48:53.159 --> 01:48:55.359
yeah, it's just like... That's actually a good

01:48:55.359 --> 01:48:58.300
point. It's pretty ridiculous if you ask me how

01:48:58.300 --> 01:49:01.560
much they buy into it. But yeah, look at all

01:49:01.560 --> 01:49:04.600
these demonic sigils. So this is Baal. Baal fits

01:49:04.600 --> 01:49:08.539
perfectly. This is Lucifer. Coincidentally, I

01:49:08.539 --> 01:49:13.159
noticed Baal being used in movies here recently.

01:49:13.439 --> 01:49:18.109
Baal is the king of... hell, basically. Yes.

01:49:18.109 --> 01:49:20.390
He's the ruler of the 70s. He's like the demon

01:49:20.390 --> 01:49:22.970
of demons. Yes, exactly. And he's been used in

01:49:22.970 --> 01:49:24.489
several movies. I wish I could remember what

01:49:24.489 --> 01:49:27.470
the name of them were as the bad character. Yeah.

01:49:27.789 --> 01:49:31.050
Totally. I mean, anything with the root word

01:49:31.050 --> 01:49:34.449
ball, like B -A -A -L or B -A -L -L, basketball,

01:49:34.630 --> 01:49:38.390
baseball. Never thought about that. It's ball.

01:49:38.510 --> 01:49:41.090
Ball is like world. Yeah. And it's a sphere.

01:49:41.189 --> 01:49:43.310
It's a sphere, too. And if you notice anything

01:49:43.310 --> 01:49:47.960
about geometry and power. Spears are horrible

01:49:47.960 --> 01:49:51.560
shapes for energetic flow. Yeah, that's true.

01:49:51.739 --> 01:49:54.119
They trap energy. Yeah, they're like a stopping

01:49:54.119 --> 01:49:57.119
point. The egg would be the preferred geometry

01:49:57.119 --> 01:50:01.460
for resonance of force energies. Makes sense.

01:50:01.600 --> 01:50:04.840
So the balls are very restrictive. Also, the

01:50:04.840 --> 01:50:07.020
other thing, too, is you just follow the black

01:50:07.020 --> 01:50:11.739
cube, right? All of the Abrahamic religions,

01:50:11.899 --> 01:50:15.409
they're symbols, okay? You have the... Christians,

01:50:15.489 --> 01:50:18.510
which worship the cross. You have the Jews, which

01:50:18.510 --> 01:50:21.670
worship the star. And you have the Muslims, which

01:50:21.670 --> 01:50:24.550
worship the moon. But the Muslims also have a

01:50:24.550 --> 01:50:28.310
black cube, the hajj, that they worship around.

01:50:28.569 --> 01:50:30.229
Oh, I didn't know that. It's a black cube, just

01:50:30.229 --> 01:50:31.770
a straight black cube. I knew about the crescent,

01:50:31.770 --> 01:50:34.369
but I had no idea. Right, okay. So check it out,

01:50:34.369 --> 01:50:36.210
though. Where else do you see the black cube?

01:50:36.289 --> 01:50:39.250
If you turn a cube, it's diagonal, and you spin

01:50:39.250 --> 01:50:41.229
it, you get a six -pointed star, like the Jewish

01:50:41.229 --> 01:50:43.529
symbol. And if you take the cube and you unfold

01:50:43.529 --> 01:50:48.840
it, You get a cross. Wow. So every Abrahamic

01:50:48.840 --> 01:50:51.300
religion is worshipping the black cube of Saturn.

01:50:51.560 --> 01:50:55.159
Saturn represents Satan. Satan represents the

01:50:55.159 --> 01:50:58.180
archetypal forces that hold everything down into

01:50:58.180 --> 01:51:01.220
matter. So the reason they're worshipping hexagons

01:51:01.220 --> 01:51:04.359
is because that is the shape that traps life

01:51:04.359 --> 01:51:08.439
force energy into a position. So there is a matrix

01:51:08.439 --> 01:51:11.119
here that's based on hexagrams that's keeping

01:51:11.119 --> 01:51:14.430
us... from exiting the matrix and the recycling

01:51:14.430 --> 01:51:18.229
process is called reincarnation so we're being

01:51:18.229 --> 01:51:21.569
reincarnated in a false prison matrix on a local

01:51:21.569 --> 01:51:24.289
level because some overlord has taken over this

01:51:24.289 --> 01:51:27.250
region of space and created a mechanism by which

01:51:27.250 --> 01:51:30.109
our souls cannot escape and they get reinserted

01:51:30.109 --> 01:51:32.409
into us and they also lose their memory every

01:51:32.409 --> 01:51:34.930
time they incarnate which is not a normal process

01:51:34.930 --> 01:51:37.729
apparently yeah so the indians have known about

01:51:37.729 --> 01:51:42.989
this for a long time oh yeah Yeah, and also too,

01:51:43.069 --> 01:51:45.989
though, the Native Americans have a lot of stories,

01:51:46.189 --> 01:51:49.109
the Hopi especially. The Hopi know a lot about

01:51:49.109 --> 01:51:52.250
the origins of things. They know that the Ant

01:51:52.250 --> 01:51:54.210
people, but the Ant people could very well be

01:51:54.210 --> 01:51:57.289
the same people that the Bible is written about.

01:51:57.550 --> 01:52:01.090
You know what I mean? I believe that the lineage

01:52:01.090 --> 01:52:03.510
of the Old Testament, the Bible, is actually

01:52:03.510 --> 01:52:06.470
the bloodline of the colonizers of this planet.

01:52:07.430 --> 01:52:11.199
So they're not the good guys. Christians are

01:52:11.199 --> 01:52:16.460
worshiping Yahweh, and Yahweh is Satan. And his

01:52:16.460 --> 01:52:22.460
brother is Lucifer. And Lil Yahweh, the Old Testament

01:52:22.460 --> 01:52:26.779
God, is archetypally indistinguishable from Satan.

01:52:27.199 --> 01:52:32.439
Wow. And his brother is actually the progenitor

01:52:32.439 --> 01:52:35.260
of the human race, because it was his DNA that

01:52:35.260 --> 01:52:39.439
created people. Oh, good. His name is Enki. Hello.

01:52:40.060 --> 01:52:42.220
You ever seen the movie Prometheus? I'm just

01:52:42.220 --> 01:52:43.399
talking about that. Yeah, oh yeah, sure is. Remember

01:52:43.399 --> 01:52:45.100
at the beginning where that guy goes down to

01:52:45.100 --> 01:52:47.720
that planet and he dissolves himself so his DNA

01:52:47.720 --> 01:52:50.119
would create life on that planet? Yeah. That's

01:52:50.119 --> 01:52:54.899
kind of like a simplified version of what you

01:52:54.899 --> 01:52:57.199
were just saying. The movie Prometheus? Yes,

01:52:57.199 --> 01:52:59.840
100%. Yeah, where the guy dissolves and his DNA

01:52:59.840 --> 01:53:02.060
seeds the planet. That's exactly it, yeah. That

01:53:02.060 --> 01:53:05.739
has to do with the Osiris story, but predominantly

01:53:05.739 --> 01:53:09.680
it comes from the Anunnaki. which are from Nibiru,

01:53:09.840 --> 01:53:14.899
which they have a caste system, and they are

01:53:14.899 --> 01:53:17.779
lizard people. Like, they look like amphibians.

01:53:18.000 --> 01:53:21.640
So, like the ancient Sumerian statues of these

01:53:21.640 --> 01:53:24.020
frog -looking entities, that's like an actual

01:53:24.020 --> 01:53:26.460
depiction of what these entities are. Slightly

01:53:26.460 --> 01:53:32.239
different note. All these people with their luggage

01:53:32.239 --> 01:53:33.899
with them, getting ready to go back home, wherever.

01:53:34.619 --> 01:53:37.899
Basketball. Interesting. Yeah, I mean, this is

01:53:37.899 --> 01:53:39.539
the best ball game. Yeah, I mean, like right

01:53:39.539 --> 01:53:41.699
there, there's someone with luggage here for

01:53:41.699 --> 01:53:43.979
the ball game. This town's very sports enthusiastic.

01:53:44.880 --> 01:53:46.760
Face it, we've got nothing else. Yeah, I know.

01:53:47.439 --> 01:53:49.680
It's really a sad thing. I've lived here for

01:53:49.680 --> 01:53:52.300
a year now, so it's like it's starting to wear

01:53:52.300 --> 01:53:53.859
on me a little bit. Where are you from? I'm from

01:53:53.859 --> 01:53:57.479
Los Angeles. Oh, okay. So, yeah, like going backwards

01:53:57.479 --> 01:53:59.779
on the trade. That would make sense on your expanded.

01:54:01.199 --> 01:54:03.460
Yeah, it's the Colts. capital of the world. Yeah,

01:54:03.539 --> 01:54:06.880
it is. Always has been. Yeah, exactly. In Pasadena,

01:54:06.920 --> 01:54:09.640
especially, it's like Theosophical Society is

01:54:09.640 --> 01:54:12.460
there. Oh, yeah. And just all these amazing cults.

01:54:12.479 --> 01:54:15.979
Oh, yeah. Scientology is there. Oh, yeah. And

01:54:15.979 --> 01:54:19.399
they're fucking... Well, we got a big hub of

01:54:19.399 --> 01:54:21.359
them now here in Kansas City. Oh, yeah. No, I've

01:54:21.359 --> 01:54:23.560
seen the building here. It's not anything compared

01:54:23.560 --> 01:54:24.899
to the real estate they have in Los Angeles.

01:54:24.899 --> 01:54:26.720
Well, it's funny because I see how they lure

01:54:26.720 --> 01:54:28.909
people. During winter, they have this winter

01:54:28.909 --> 01:54:30.930
wonderland out there. Yeah. It has these big

01:54:30.930 --> 01:54:33.010
candy canes and these giant elves and stuff.

01:54:33.050 --> 01:54:35.409
Come on in. Bring your kids on in. Yeah. No,

01:54:35.470 --> 01:54:37.609
I get it, man. It's really funny. I mean, like.

01:54:37.750 --> 01:54:39.850
No different than a megachurch. Yeah, I mean,

01:54:39.850 --> 01:54:41.829
but look at what these churches are doing. I

01:54:41.829 --> 01:54:44.670
mean, look at fucking Christmas. Look at Christmas.

01:54:45.069 --> 01:54:47.989
What in the fuck do the symbols of Christmas

01:54:47.989 --> 01:54:51.430
have to do? It's actually from a mushroom cult.

01:54:51.729 --> 01:54:55.670
It's entirely based on an Egyptian Osirian mushroom

01:54:55.670 --> 01:55:02.220
cult. Really? I'll kill you. Every single symbol

01:55:02.220 --> 01:55:05.279
for Christmas is an Amanita muscaria symbol.

01:55:05.600 --> 01:55:10.319
So Amanita muscaria grows. The mushrooms bloom

01:55:10.319 --> 01:55:12.180
at night, so you would naturally go out the longest

01:55:12.180 --> 01:55:14.140
night of the year, which is December 21st. And

01:55:14.140 --> 01:55:16.199
then you would go hunting. You would bring a

01:55:16.199 --> 01:55:18.020
reindeer in order to go hunting with it because

01:55:18.020 --> 01:55:19.600
they sniff out the mushrooms and they eat the

01:55:19.600 --> 01:55:21.340
mushrooms. And then they pee out the mushrooms.

01:55:21.359 --> 01:55:22.960
And then you drink the pee and you get a sniff.

01:55:24.500 --> 01:55:26.600
People will do to get stoned. I know. That's

01:55:26.600 --> 01:55:27.859
what I'm saying. This is what they used to do.

01:55:27.920 --> 01:55:30.439
So you can't really imbibe the mushrooms yourself

01:55:30.439 --> 01:55:33.039
without getting sick unless you dry them appropriately

01:55:33.039 --> 01:55:36.109
or you pass them through a reindeer. And so the

01:55:36.109 --> 01:55:37.750
way that you would dry them appropriately is

01:55:37.750 --> 01:55:39.510
you would put them in a stocking over a fire,

01:55:39.649 --> 01:55:42.630
or you would hang them on the pine tree that

01:55:42.630 --> 01:55:45.250
they grow on. There you go. So that's basically

01:55:45.250 --> 01:55:47.069
all the symbols. That makes a lot of sense. And

01:55:47.069 --> 01:55:49.510
then you eat the mushrooms, and then you go to

01:55:49.510 --> 01:55:51.869
the North Pole, and you meet Santa's helpers.

01:55:51.989 --> 01:55:54.310
And the Santa's helpers, the elves, what they're

01:55:54.310 --> 01:55:57.989
actually doing is they're energetic elementals,

01:55:57.989 --> 01:56:00.949
and they are actually creating matter out of

01:56:00.949 --> 01:56:05.159
sound and light. So their job is literally creating

01:56:05.159 --> 01:56:07.720
presence, creating presence of gifts, creating

01:56:07.720 --> 01:56:11.279
gift of presence, creating now, creating material

01:56:11.279 --> 01:56:15.000
reality. And so, and yeah, the whole North Pole

01:56:15.000 --> 01:56:16.899
thing, it has to do with, you know, your Kundalini

01:56:16.899 --> 01:56:21.279
and the imbibing of the psilocybin or psilocin.

01:56:21.539 --> 01:56:25.460
And yeah, it's the color scheme, the cookies,

01:56:25.560 --> 01:56:28.399
the milk and cookies, the cookies are a mushroom

01:56:28.399 --> 01:56:30.880
cap, dried mushroom cap. Because the Amanita

01:56:30.880 --> 01:56:33.399
Muscaria cap is red with white dots. Exactly.

01:56:33.619 --> 01:56:35.220
Yeah, wow. So it looks like a chocolate chip

01:56:35.220 --> 01:56:37.520
cookie. Yeah, exactly. Makes sense. So every

01:56:37.520 --> 01:56:41.659
single Christmas symbol, including the three

01:56:41.659 --> 01:56:44.340
-day drying period, because it's all based on

01:56:44.340 --> 01:56:46.140
the fact that the longest night of the year is

01:56:46.140 --> 01:56:48.640
December 21st, and then you can't see the length

01:56:48.640 --> 01:56:51.659
of day grow for three days. So then on December

01:56:51.659 --> 01:56:54.039
25th is the first day that you notice that we're

01:56:54.039 --> 01:56:56.859
going into the new season. So it's the rebirth

01:56:56.859 --> 01:57:01.359
of the sun. Trio's of things. Powerful. It's

01:57:01.359 --> 01:57:03.539
amazing. I had a great time talking to you. You

01:57:03.539 --> 01:57:08.800
ever read the book Imagica? Hang on. Imagica

01:57:08.800 --> 01:57:11.300
is an excellent book. It has a whole different

01:57:11.300 --> 01:57:15.680
take on the five dominions, the reality we live

01:57:15.680 --> 01:57:19.100
in, and a whole different take on... You know,

01:57:19.119 --> 01:57:22.140
Jesus was a reconciler, not a Messiah. He was

01:57:22.140 --> 01:57:24.619
there to reconcile the dominions back into one.

01:57:24.819 --> 01:57:27.500
Yeah, 100%. It's a really interesting read. We

01:57:27.500 --> 01:57:29.899
come up here a lot and just bullshit. Yeah, me

01:57:29.899 --> 01:57:31.979
too. I'm here like honestly every day almost.

01:57:32.319 --> 01:57:36.060
Really? All right. Like Monday or Tuesday at

01:57:36.060 --> 01:57:39.720
this time. Yeah. Here, let me write down. Oh,

01:57:39.720 --> 01:57:42.119
okay. No, I can't do it because I'm recording.

01:57:42.500 --> 01:57:59.850
Okay, I'll just write it on here. Okay. I would

01:57:59.850 --> 01:58:02.590
love to talk to you guys. I study this stuff

01:58:02.590 --> 01:58:06.289
primarily. Tentatively, our podcast is going

01:58:06.289 --> 01:58:08.050
to be called Two Douchebags with a Microphone.

01:58:09.149 --> 01:58:13.289
Only we don't have a microphone yet. It's really

01:58:13.289 --> 01:58:16.449
good. I like it. I've been flirting with the

01:58:16.449 --> 01:58:18.170
idea of getting into the podcast. You should.

01:58:18.390 --> 01:58:21.630
I just don't want the negative tension. Especially

01:58:21.630 --> 01:58:25.430
with Gematria. It's basically the killing. It's

01:58:25.430 --> 01:58:27.989
the code by which murder is done secretly. So,

01:58:28.029 --> 01:58:30.329
like, obviously no one using it negatively is

01:58:30.329 --> 01:58:32.869
going to want the information exposed. And I've

01:58:32.869 --> 01:58:36.210
just had some very surreal experiences, like,

01:58:36.270 --> 01:58:39.390
trying to put out information. Like, I'll, like,

01:58:39.430 --> 01:58:41.609
do a decode and then something fucking unexplainable

01:58:41.609 --> 01:58:44.130
will happen to me shortly thereafter. Yeah. Well,

01:58:44.130 --> 01:58:46.390
here, I'll tell you what, the next one we do,

01:58:46.449 --> 01:58:49.210
if you choose to want to be a part of it, is...

01:58:49.500 --> 01:58:51.500
We'll go into some different stuff like theories

01:58:51.500 --> 01:58:54.359
on cryptocurrency. Just theories. Yeah, yeah,

01:58:54.359 --> 01:58:55.939
yeah. You know, just like what you think it might

01:58:55.939 --> 01:58:57.920
be, what it's going to. Clearly, it's obviously

01:58:57.920 --> 01:58:59.939
the mark of the beast. Everything that's going

01:58:59.939 --> 01:59:03.319
on right now is like Revelation 13, 17. We're

01:59:03.319 --> 01:59:05.880
literally in the book of Revelations right now.

01:59:06.000 --> 01:59:08.239
Yeah, we are. About the only time we're in there

01:59:08.239 --> 01:59:10.939
is like right now. It's pretty remarkable. And

01:59:10.939 --> 01:59:14.199
then we go away, which is very concerning. I

01:59:14.199 --> 01:59:16.979
mean, I'm... Or at least the way I read it. I

01:59:16.979 --> 01:59:19.899
don't believe in... the way that they preach

01:59:19.899 --> 01:59:23.880
fear in those religious texts. Oh, okay, I know

01:59:23.880 --> 01:59:25.600
what you mean. I don't mean it like that. What

01:59:25.600 --> 01:59:28.619
I mean is the omission of us after that is what

01:59:28.619 --> 01:59:31.460
gets me. Because I don't think I see any mention

01:59:31.460 --> 01:59:35.140
of us after this. That's interesting. I think

01:59:35.140 --> 01:59:38.460
that, again, it's all about, I think that we've

01:59:38.460 --> 01:59:42.079
been here a lot longer than they claim to be.

01:59:42.180 --> 01:59:43.800
I think the entire origin of it. I'll be right

01:59:43.800 --> 01:59:46.279
back. Look, I mean, they can't get anything else

01:59:46.279 --> 01:59:49.500
right. Why do they get this right? Why all of

01:59:49.500 --> 01:59:51.359
a sudden they got this one gem, this one gem,

01:59:51.500 --> 01:59:53.659
and everything else is shit? Right, no, but it's

01:59:53.659 --> 01:59:55.300
very interesting. I think that the biblical,

01:59:55.579 --> 02:00:01.460
the antediluvian, like the flood, like there

02:00:01.460 --> 02:00:04.880
was a world before the flood. And I believe that

02:00:04.880 --> 02:00:07.720
the flood did kind of like... Plants the world,

02:00:07.760 --> 02:00:12.159
yeah. And whether it be sent by God or if it

02:00:12.159 --> 02:00:14.609
was just like... a plasma apocalypse based on

02:00:14.609 --> 02:00:16.710
the, you know, position of the planets. Yeah,

02:00:16.710 --> 02:00:18.729
it could have been, yeah. You know, but it's...

02:00:18.729 --> 02:00:20.649
It could have been a tidal wave. Who the hell

02:00:20.649 --> 02:00:22.229
knows? I think everything that we're going through

02:00:22.229 --> 02:00:24.890
is directly related to this, like, plasma apocalypse

02:00:24.890 --> 02:00:27.149
that I know is coming because the Earth's poles

02:00:27.149 --> 02:00:29.390
are shifting so that they're trying to prepare

02:00:29.390 --> 02:00:32.270
us for this, like, this inevitable future. And

02:00:32.270 --> 02:00:34.670
they want it to be like the Georgia Guidestones

02:00:34.670 --> 02:00:37.310
feature where there's, like, only 500 ,000 people

02:00:37.310 --> 02:00:39.229
in the world and everyone else is just wiped

02:00:39.229 --> 02:00:44.329
out. I got to look it up. The Center to Use Control

02:00:44.329 --> 02:00:47.390
had these statistics out, and they had the world

02:00:47.390 --> 02:00:50.430
marked down in 10 years to 100 million people.

02:00:50.970 --> 02:00:53.850
They're never accurate with their projections

02:00:53.850 --> 02:00:56.489
of how much they want us to die. No, I know,

02:00:56.569 --> 02:00:58.890
but I mean... Coronavirus being the prime example.

02:00:59.130 --> 02:01:01.189
They're totally inflating numbers in order to

02:01:01.189 --> 02:01:05.789
get their... It's all about central banking digital

02:01:05.789 --> 02:01:08.130
currency. It's the whole reason that this whole

02:01:08.130 --> 02:01:11.069
shit is happening. is because what the injections

02:01:11.069 --> 02:01:15.489
most likely really are is an attempt for them

02:01:15.489 --> 02:01:18.010
to hook us up biologically to the internet of

02:01:18.010 --> 02:01:22.130
things and the internet of bio nanotech so that's

02:01:22.130 --> 02:01:24.970
why they're injecting us with uh paramagnetic

02:01:24.970 --> 02:01:30.310
uh like substances and um do you know what the

02:01:30.310 --> 02:01:33.229
substance they use to track this injection is

02:01:33.229 --> 02:01:37.029
called it uses a bioluminescence and it's called

02:01:38.679 --> 02:01:41.739
Luciferase. Luciferase. Lucifer, A -Z -E. Yeah,

02:01:41.739 --> 02:01:44.560
Luciferase. Lucifer means light bringer. Exactly.

02:01:44.600 --> 02:01:46.199
So what they're doing is they're bringing light.

02:01:46.199 --> 02:01:48.100
Yeah, the god of light. And they're using light

02:01:48.100 --> 02:01:51.819
bioluminescence to track these things around

02:01:51.819 --> 02:01:57.840
your body. And not to mention they're using graphene

02:01:57.840 --> 02:02:02.100
dioxide or graphene oxide, which is like a paramagnetic

02:02:02.100 --> 02:02:07.310
thing that they can use frequencies to... build

02:02:07.310 --> 02:02:10.869
structures, nanostructures. Yeah, I've heard

02:02:10.869 --> 02:02:15.250
of graphene. So it has to do with carbon nanotubes

02:02:15.250 --> 02:02:17.590
and that kind of stuff. Star Trek stuff. I've

02:02:17.590 --> 02:02:19.029
got something on a slightly different note. My

02:02:19.029 --> 02:02:20.710
mind's going everywhere in case there's conversations.

02:02:21.130 --> 02:02:23.930
But okay, when people die and then they come

02:02:23.930 --> 02:02:26.729
back whenever, later, whatever, you know, they

02:02:26.729 --> 02:02:30.489
see light. Lucifer. Yeah, it's the false light.

02:02:30.789 --> 02:02:32.289
It's the false light. Don't go into the light.

02:02:32.329 --> 02:02:33.909
That's what I always thought. Don't ever go into

02:02:33.909 --> 02:02:36.569
the light. Go into here. heart. Because that's

02:02:36.569 --> 02:02:40.289
one thing that has never been argued. Everybody

02:02:40.289 --> 02:02:43.609
sees this light. That's the false slate mechanism.

02:02:44.350 --> 02:02:48.869
They say that the actual moon itself has a nuclear

02:02:48.869 --> 02:02:51.869
machine inside of it that they're using for this

02:02:51.869 --> 02:02:55.149
recycling program. There's literally a soul recycling

02:02:55.149 --> 02:03:00.229
plant inside of them. And basically it's a nuclear

02:03:00.229 --> 02:03:03.250
reactor that snatches your soul as it tries to

02:03:03.250 --> 02:03:08.119
escape the... Because when you die, you maintain

02:03:08.119 --> 02:03:10.760
self -awareness to a degree. And then you can

02:03:10.760 --> 02:03:14.779
either continue with self -awareness or just

02:03:14.779 --> 02:03:18.420
dissipate into nothingness, depending on how

02:03:18.420 --> 02:03:20.579
self -aware you are. So you kind of speak your

02:03:20.579 --> 02:03:23.199
own existence, like everybody. Yeah, absolutely.

02:03:23.319 --> 02:03:27.680
And if you don't maintain that awareness, like

02:03:27.680 --> 02:03:29.380
if you go into the light rather than into your

02:03:29.380 --> 02:03:32.439
heart center, the heart of hearts. then you will

02:03:32.439 --> 02:03:34.619
get distracted by all these holographic spiritual,

02:03:34.939 --> 02:03:37.779
like, fourth, lower dimensional things. Because

02:03:37.779 --> 02:03:42.020
everything requires food. And even things in

02:03:42.020 --> 02:03:43.760
the fourth dimension, things without bodies,

02:03:43.779 --> 02:03:46.579
plasma entities, they still need food in order

02:03:46.579 --> 02:03:49.899
to survive. They need energy. And so that's why

02:03:49.899 --> 02:03:53.520
they set up these parasitic, you know, soul traps

02:03:53.520 --> 02:03:57.079
for large planetary bodies of people to fall

02:03:57.079 --> 02:04:01.020
into their system so that they can be... It's

02:04:01.020 --> 02:04:03.939
called Lush. Lush is the life force energy that

02:04:03.939 --> 02:04:07.800
is taken against your will. Your mention of distraction

02:04:07.800 --> 02:04:11.619
really struck a chord with me. In Frank Herbert's

02:04:11.619 --> 02:04:15.260
Dune books, he talks about Gafla, the gadfly

02:04:15.260 --> 02:04:20.640
distraction. It's one little thing that's a distraction,

02:04:20.800 --> 02:04:24.560
but it can totally ruin your life. Because you're

02:04:24.560 --> 02:04:26.840
distracted by this little thing, and then everything

02:04:26.840 --> 02:04:28.960
momentous happens. You're distracted driving.

02:04:29.659 --> 02:04:33.380
It kills you. And so in Dune, spice is louche.

02:04:33.560 --> 02:04:36.779
Yeah. They're indistinguishable. So, like, the

02:04:36.779 --> 02:04:38.840
way that they're getting energy is through us,

02:04:39.039 --> 02:04:41.220
you know? Just like how the money system works,

02:04:41.279 --> 02:04:43.720
you know, recently. Like, we are the collateral

02:04:43.720 --> 02:04:46.100
for the debts that are being taken out by the

02:04:46.100 --> 02:04:49.239
government. Wow. That is scary, and we are, yeah.

02:04:49.520 --> 02:04:52.180
Yeah. We really are. Soylent Green is people,

02:04:52.279 --> 02:04:54.920
but Soylent Green is money. Yeah. And money is

02:04:54.920 --> 02:04:57.220
made out of people. Yep. And every dollar in

02:04:57.220 --> 02:05:00.720
circulation is someone in debt. Yeah, indentured

02:05:00.720 --> 02:05:05.939
servants. We all are. By this society. Hey, we'll

02:05:05.939 --> 02:05:09.239
talk to you soon, okay, man? All right, sounds

02:05:09.239 --> 02:05:13.020
great. That was cool. That was very cool. That

02:05:13.020 --> 02:05:16.079
was awesome. This is Joshua Belmont, your food

02:05:16.079 --> 02:05:19.119
for thought man on The Hustle. Today, we would

02:05:19.119 --> 02:05:22.800
like to celebrate Mr. Timothy J. Brottux, who

02:05:22.800 --> 02:05:26.180
is credited for the invention of two -ply toilet

02:05:26.180 --> 02:05:30.020
paper. Because of you, Timmy. We no longer have

02:05:30.020 --> 02:05:33.260
to spend 10 minutes scrubbing our fingernails

02:05:33.260 --> 02:05:37.060
after every dump. Mr. Bratox, you are a true

02:05:37.060 --> 02:05:40.960
hero. Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

02:05:41.239 --> 02:05:45.520
It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

02:05:45.760 --> 02:05:49.439
May every time you put on your shoelaces, the

02:05:49.439 --> 02:05:53.420
laces be tied in a knot. You watched the news.

02:05:53.680 --> 02:05:58.229
It looks grim. Is an apocalypse inevitable? We

02:05:58.229 --> 02:06:00.670
suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand

02:06:00.670 --> 02:06:05.130
and have multiple mobile chargers. We have the

02:06:05.130 --> 02:06:10.689
post -apocalypse. One of the most overlooked

02:06:10.689 --> 02:06:14.409
post -apocalypse need is first aid. Have several

02:06:14.409 --> 02:06:17.050
kits and metal canisters, one in your bunker

02:06:17.050 --> 02:06:20.529
and the rest buried near natural markers such

02:06:20.529 --> 02:06:25.170
as odd trees or natural clearings, gauze, salve,

02:06:25.210 --> 02:06:29.260
ointment. antibiotics, sutures, thread, needles,

02:06:29.460 --> 02:06:33.579
sharp knives, and scissors should be in all of

02:06:33.579 --> 02:06:38.159
the kits. People often ask, how do we cram so

02:06:38.159 --> 02:06:40.939
much money into one little shell? Well, it's

02:06:40.939 --> 02:06:43.960
simple. We buy funny in bulk on the internet.

02:06:44.779 --> 02:06:47.399
Hey, Mark, you're wanted at the front door. There's

02:06:47.399 --> 02:06:49.520
a big bag of funny they need you to sign for.

02:06:50.600 --> 02:06:52.800
Okay, thanks a lot. I'll be right there. I'm

02:06:52.800 --> 02:06:54.760
still sorting out the funny we got from yesterday.

02:06:55.550 --> 02:06:57.949
There's your answer. We buy funny in bulk on

02:06:57.949 --> 02:07:00.810
the internet. Sir, I see your qualifications

02:07:00.810 --> 02:07:03.670
here. May I ask some further questions that could

02:07:03.670 --> 02:07:05.510
help me determine your employment eligibility?

02:07:06.329 --> 02:07:09.489
Yes, sir. I'm ready. Well, as you can see here,

02:07:09.569 --> 02:07:11.689
we have a large population of different ethnic

02:07:11.689 --> 02:07:16.090
backgrounds, sexuality, and ages. Are you by

02:07:16.090 --> 02:07:19.310
chance bilingual? Well, sir, I'm not sure why

02:07:19.310 --> 02:07:21.590
you need that kind of information, but, well,

02:07:21.670 --> 02:07:25.039
it was only one time in summer camp. I considered

02:07:25.039 --> 02:07:33.140
it experimental. Great news, assholes. You can

02:07:33.140 --> 02:07:37.439
now email the douches anytime, anywhere. In the

02:07:37.439 --> 02:07:40.680
middle of a job interview. No big deal. Taking

02:07:40.680 --> 02:07:44.600
a bath? No problems there. Tap dancing. Easy

02:07:44.600 --> 02:07:48.260
as pie. Just send it to 2douches at mail .com.

02:07:48.359 --> 02:07:51.060
Do it now, pussies, or I'll smash you in the

02:07:51.060 --> 02:07:55.460
junk. Now it's time for pickup lines from a loser.

02:07:55.720 --> 02:08:30.220
Are you a banana? You look appealing. This is

02:08:30.220 --> 02:08:33.359
Two Douchebags and Microphone. I am Mark, here

02:08:33.359 --> 02:08:37.220
in the Kansas City area at the Talk is Cheap

02:08:37.220 --> 02:08:45.619
studio, and I like to make goat noises. And I

02:08:45.619 --> 02:08:50.039
am Rob, in Wheeling, Missouri, home of the magnificent

02:08:50.039 --> 02:08:54.239
Lucas Oil Speedway and Water Track, and also

02:08:54.239 --> 02:08:56.979
home of Peckham O's Country Store, where you

02:08:56.979 --> 02:09:10.520
can find all... I just got a bulletin, Rob. It

02:09:10.520 --> 02:09:13.819
says that there's a brand new ice rink at the

02:09:13.819 --> 02:09:20.359
Lucas Oil Speedway. And that's where the water

02:09:20.359 --> 02:09:23.640
track was. That's why I keep seeing everybody

02:09:23.640 --> 02:09:26.300
over there. Yeah, yeah, yep. Yeah, it's the water

02:09:26.300 --> 02:09:28.180
track. It throws over. They turned the water

02:09:28.180 --> 02:09:31.539
track into an ice rink. Yeah, yeah. So there

02:09:31.539 --> 02:09:34.659
you go. I think something for the 377 people

02:09:34.659 --> 02:09:38.850
to do. Yes, that's true. Go out there and like

02:09:38.850 --> 02:09:41.050
fly around on the ice. Most of them are elderly.

02:09:41.390 --> 02:09:44.430
Yeah. Oh, yeah. They can do it even better. They've

02:09:44.430 --> 02:09:45.989
been doing it their whole life, right? Yeah.

02:09:46.390 --> 02:09:50.449
Yeah. I remember as a child skating around on

02:09:50.449 --> 02:09:53.289
whatever ice we could, you know, on a pond or

02:09:53.289 --> 02:09:56.590
whatever. And you'd be flying around. And it's

02:09:56.590 --> 02:10:00.310
a weird thing because you'd start sweating. And

02:10:00.310 --> 02:10:02.409
then when you'd stop, it would freeze on your

02:10:02.409 --> 02:10:08.630
face. Good times, right? All right, I got a story

02:10:08.630 --> 02:10:11.649
here. There was an adult Chuck E. Cheese in Kansas

02:10:11.649 --> 02:10:14.369
City until last week when it closed permanently.

02:10:14.970 --> 02:10:17.930
An adult Chuck E. Cheese. I'm not kidding you.

02:10:17.949 --> 02:10:20.350
This is what they call it. This is what it said

02:10:20.350 --> 02:10:24.609
on the store front. Adult Chuck E. Cheese. Yeah,

02:10:24.689 --> 02:10:27.350
place, I'd never heard about it until it closed.

02:10:27.829 --> 02:10:31.210
I mean, it sounded fun. Pinball games, arcade

02:10:31.210 --> 02:10:35.260
games, bowling, shitty pizza. You know, it sounds

02:10:35.260 --> 02:10:38.300
like Sky Zone had a slow little brother named

02:10:38.300 --> 02:10:42.300
Adult Chuck E. Cheese. Doesn't it? The male mouse

02:10:42.300 --> 02:10:45.460
running around in a bikini. Ah, yes, yes, you

02:10:45.460 --> 02:10:48.680
can't beat that. Mini, mini going around, mini

02:10:48.680 --> 02:10:52.579
slut. Isn't that great? Yeah, mini slut. So,

02:10:52.600 --> 02:10:57.399
I can tell you why it failed, though. What if

02:10:57.399 --> 02:10:59.640
you went there and you saw some friends, right?

02:10:59.859 --> 02:11:02.380
You'd never be able to erase the pussy image

02:11:02.380 --> 02:11:05.729
that you would receive. Because people go, is

02:11:05.729 --> 02:11:08.029
that the guy that was at the adult Chuck E. Cheese?

02:11:08.050 --> 02:11:10.529
Yeah, yeah, that's him. Oh, my gosh. Man, what

02:11:10.529 --> 02:11:13.050
a pussy. Just don't look at him. Maybe he'll

02:11:13.050 --> 02:11:14.850
leave. We don't need him around here. We don't

02:11:14.850 --> 02:11:17.649
need that kind of shit. So, I mean, you know,

02:11:17.770 --> 02:11:22.109
to me, that's the equivalent of walking into

02:11:22.109 --> 02:11:24.590
a Jack booth and seeing your pastor coming out

02:11:24.590 --> 02:11:28.710
of one of the booths. Yeah. Yeah. It's like,

02:11:28.770 --> 02:11:34.510
oh, no. Oh no, they saw me. I come out of the

02:11:34.510 --> 02:11:38.930
adult Chuck E. Cheese. I mean, you'd never get

02:11:38.930 --> 02:11:40.729
over that, right? I mean, people would always

02:11:40.729 --> 02:11:42.729
talk about that. And that's the guy right there.

02:11:43.090 --> 02:11:45.750
That guy right there? He went to the adult Chuck

02:11:45.750 --> 02:11:47.970
E. Cheese? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He actually paid

02:11:47.970 --> 02:11:52.010
to get in there? Yeah. Oh my gosh. So, I've got

02:11:52.010 --> 02:11:55.069
a question though, Rob. Okay. If you weigh 99

02:11:55.069 --> 02:11:57.270
pounds and you eat a pound of nachos, does that

02:11:57.270 --> 02:12:06.800
mean that you are 1 % nachos? I'm going to say

02:12:06.800 --> 02:12:11.939
yeah. I say yeah, too. Technically, yes. All

02:12:11.939 --> 02:12:15.079
right. If you drop soap on the floor, is the

02:12:15.079 --> 02:12:22.840
soap dirty or is the floor clean? I'm going to

02:12:22.840 --> 02:12:25.079
say the soap's dirty because all the germs that

02:12:25.079 --> 02:12:29.380
was on the floor is now transferred to the soap,

02:12:29.520 --> 02:12:42.220
right? No? Yes. Sorry, I had to mute you for

02:12:42.220 --> 02:12:47.159
a second. No, that's okay. Okay, here's the last

02:12:47.159 --> 02:12:48.939
one I'm going to do for right now, and then we'll

02:12:48.939 --> 02:12:51.899
get to you and what you want to do. If you're

02:12:51.899 --> 02:12:56.000
clean after taking a shower, how does the towel

02:12:56.000 --> 02:12:59.800
get dirty when you wipe yourself off? You're

02:12:59.800 --> 02:13:02.460
clean, right? No. You just got out of the shower

02:13:02.460 --> 02:13:09.930
and you're clean. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's

02:13:09.930 --> 02:13:12.590
clean water. Yeah. It's already washed everything

02:13:12.590 --> 02:13:15.529
off of you. Yeah. I mean, just don't dig too

02:13:15.529 --> 02:13:17.689
much in your ass crack, you know, because, you

02:13:17.689 --> 02:13:19.989
know. Yeah, you got to watch that. Yeah, you

02:13:19.989 --> 02:13:21.850
got to watch that. And don't be swiping your

02:13:21.850 --> 02:13:24.630
balls too much. And you might want to wash your

02:13:24.630 --> 02:13:26.720
towel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you got to let your

02:13:26.720 --> 02:13:28.420
bowl strip dry because you don't want to take

02:13:28.420 --> 02:13:30.939
a swipe on your towel. And then the next time

02:13:30.939 --> 02:13:33.680
when you take a shower, you take the bowl gravy

02:13:33.680 --> 02:13:36.279
that you had on the towel and you rub it all

02:13:36.279 --> 02:13:40.060
over your face because you forgot, right? Yep.

02:13:40.340 --> 02:13:44.020
Yep. So we're here to help. We're here to help.

02:13:44.340 --> 02:13:48.760
So that being said, Rob, let's go to you. All

02:13:48.760 --> 02:13:52.920
right. Well, I got another criminal for us. Oh,

02:13:52.920 --> 02:14:03.979
good. Good, good, good. Madison neighborhood

02:14:03.979 --> 02:14:07.739
were left baffled yesterday after local man William

02:14:07.739 --> 02:14:12.020
Darby, 62, was arrested for allegedly stealing

02:14:12.020 --> 02:14:16.560
garden gnomes from multiple flower beds. Hell

02:14:16.560 --> 02:14:24.260
yeah. Yes. Well, you all see his picture. You'd

02:14:24.260 --> 02:14:37.300
understand. Is that good? the cover of darkness,

02:14:37.560 --> 02:14:42.859
leaving a trail of upturned mulch and bewildered

02:14:42.859 --> 02:14:47.640
lawn ornaments in his wake. Neighbors say he

02:14:47.640 --> 02:14:51.479
targeted gnomes of all shapes and sizes, from

02:14:51.479 --> 02:14:55.779
tiny pointy hat classics to the rare gnome holding

02:14:55.779 --> 02:15:00.699
a fishing pole. I woke up and my gnome was gone,

02:15:00.779 --> 02:15:04.829
exclaimed Wonder, isn't it? I think he even took

02:15:04.829 --> 02:15:08.430
my Mr. Stubbles. The one with the Santa hat.

02:15:10.529 --> 02:15:14.750
And that one was supposed to guard the azaleas.

02:15:16.069 --> 02:15:19.630
The Boone County man was apprehended when officers

02:15:19.630 --> 02:15:23.289
spotted him trying to resell a gnome collection

02:15:23.289 --> 02:15:28.609
on Facebook Marketplace. Listed under slightly

02:15:28.609 --> 02:15:33.489
used, emotionally unstable yard prints. Uh -huh.

02:15:35.050 --> 02:16:08.060
Uh -huh. chin and maybe a slight mustache. Yeah,

02:16:08.079 --> 02:16:15.739
no, he looks like a type. Yeah, you look him

02:16:15.739 --> 02:16:19.479
up. I will. I'm going to. When we get done with

02:16:19.479 --> 02:16:23.920
this podcast, I will, Rob. Thank you. Sounds

02:16:23.920 --> 02:16:31.699
cool to me. All right. Do you want to keep going

02:16:31.699 --> 02:16:36.319
or do you want to end it? It's 9 .17. Actually,

02:16:36.360 --> 02:16:39.860
I think I'm about done. You know what? Me too,

02:16:39.940 --> 02:16:41.799
man. It's been a long day. I had to go to work

02:16:41.799 --> 02:16:45.760
early. People drove like shit. Snow was everywhere.

02:16:46.020 --> 02:16:48.700
It was fucking five below. I think I'm ready

02:16:48.700 --> 02:16:55.579
for bed. I got you, dude. I don't fucking blame

02:16:55.579 --> 02:16:58.780
you, dude. All right, Rob, thank you for joining

02:16:58.780 --> 02:17:02.399
us once again. It's not bad. It's not bad. That's

02:17:02.399 --> 02:17:07.760
cool. Cool. All right, everybody, thank you for

02:17:07.760 --> 02:17:12.940
listening. Good night, assholes. Good night,

02:17:12.979 --> 02:17:13.520
assholes.