Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the last
supper. Hey, guess what? You just landed on the
Sports Bastards. Sorry about your luck. I have
a pet termite I call Clint. Wow, no shit. How
strange. Yeah, I call it Clint Eats Wood. The
Sports Bastards. The only sports show with gusto.
That's right. I said gusto. Just like Schlitz
beer. Google it. Hey, here we are with Sports
Bastards after week one of the NFL wrapped up
last night. Yes. With Chicago looking like they
were dominating, but then Minnesota came back
and... Yeah, what was it, 11 -point deficit?
The rookie brought them back. Yeah, yeah. So
the Sunday night game and the Monday night game
were pretty much thrillers. Yeah, yeah. Pretty
damn good, actually. Yeah, overall, I think from
a viewership standpoint, the NFL's got to be
pretty pleased with the way the games went. Oh,
I would think so. Yeah, there's so many close,
tight games. McCarthy, the quarterback for the
Vikings, started off real shaky, but I saw a
guy that got calmer. and actually started doing
things better. Yeah, and I was seeing him out
there being a quarterback. Exactly. Leading the
team, telling people what to do, taking charge.
Even though he's a rookie and the guy next to
him is a seven -year veteran, you're his boss
because you're the quarterback. I like to look
on the seven -year veteran's face. Yeah. He was
believing it. He wasn't like, here's this fucking
guy. Exactly. Exactly. Oh, thank you. It makes
a big difference. Oh, this is awesome service.
City Market Coffee Roasters are the best. They
are. And you are the best. Thank you so much.
Thank you. What's your name? Tara. Tara? Tara.
Oh, okay. Thank you. Appreciate it. So everyone
come down and ask for her. Yeah. Yep. So, sports
bastards. I was listening to some of our old
podcasts, and I realized that at some point we
stopped introducing ourselves, but I guess they
knew who the hell we are. We did, didn't we?
Okay. All right. Well, I'm Mark. And I'm Topher.
All right. And if you're wondering if it's the
same idiot, Mark, that does the show with Rob,
yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So, not like you couldn't
tell that. Yeah. Oh, you know, I've got a funny
story about that, just right before we get into
it. You know how we did our last podcast from
the... oh oh yeah yeah thank you that looks amazing
yeah here have one thank you very much thank
you so much yeah we got some food delivered here
is there cheese in it um i don't think so that's
why i got it oh there might oh yeah there is
i'm sorry that's okay i had a whole bunch of
eggs before i got here no but you know how last
week we did our show from the uh the rock island
bridge It turns out I think that was a special
preview event. Because when I got home, I saw
an email in my inbox. What they really wanted
was you and Rob. And then you show up with me.
Because they had a whole event planned and they
had stuff that was going to happen. But when
they saw it was you and me instead of Rob, they
canceled it all. It was just like, screw these
guys. Well, everybody likes Rob and they hate
us. So what the fuck? We don't care. So, you
know, sorry, Rob. It was supposed to be your
moment, but they didn't realize it was the sports
bastards, and they got me instead. Yep. Oh, well.
But we'll still go back. Well, um, okay. Sorry
about eating on the show, but, um... Gotta do
what you gotta do. Yep. Feed the machine. Let's
go into the chief's loss. Oh, gosh. Well, they
had... opportunities to win the game late in
the game. True. Yeah, they were never out of
it. Yeah. Which is kind of usual for the Chiefs.
Yeah. You could kind of see Spagnuolo's defense
starting to catch a little bit at the end there.
Yeah, yeah. You know, he doesn't know what he
has. He's got a bunch of people on there that
never really played that much. Yeah, and working
together. Yes, is the thing. That's a big thing.
No Deion Bush. No Justin Reed. Both of those
hurt us crazy. Yeah. So, my thought is this.
You might see them lose to the Eagles. Yeah.
The Eagles, they're going pretty good. They're
on all cylinders. Yeah, yeah. But they play everybody
in the division twice except for the Chargers,
and they can handle business there too. Yeah.
So, an 0 -2. that play the Giants next. Yeah,
yeah. So, and I'm not saying they're not going
to win, but I'm thinking they're still taking
baking steps trying to become the team that they
want to be. Yeah, yeah. And I think where the
Eagles are ahead of them there right now, that
they are the team they want to be right now.
That's kind of the overall theme I got from this
opening weekend is there are some teams that
aren't ready yet and some that are. And on those
teams, there are some players that aren't ready
yet. Yeah. The Eagles look ready. The Cowboys
look pretty ready. Yeah. The Chiefs did not look
ready. No. And a number of the receivers just
didn't look ready. No. They say Xavier Worthy
is not a serious injury. Yeah. I don't know.
My mom dislocated her shoulder just falling down
in a parking lot. Uh -huh. And she couldn't use
that shoulder normally for probably eight weeks.
So I would be really surprised if Xavier Worthy
is able to make a significant contribution this
season. No, I read. Shoulder brace. Yeah. They
said that he could wear a shoulder brace catch.
And I guess that's her plan of action. But raising
your arm over your head after you've had a dislocated
shoulder, I just don't see how that's realistic.
Unless you inject, like, you know, human sacrifice
stem cells into your shoulder, summon the serpent,
dance around the fire a couple times. I guess
you can heal up like some of these people do.
I'm going to recommend that. I'm going to recommend
that. Yeah. I've had dislocated shoulder three
times. Oh, gosh, those suck. Yeah, it did. Along
with what they call a hill sack lesion. Dude.
Yeah, it's a crack. And on those, the MRI will
tell everything. Yeah. Okay. On those, you don't
generally operate. You are very, very careful
for a long, long, long time. And I was very careful,
but I still dislocate my shoulder way too often.
From what I've heard, shoulder surgery should
always be considered last resort. You try everything
before you go to surgery. And you can even see
that in the NFL, a lot of players. When you see
shoulder surgery, it's like, yeah, they're done.
They're done. They'll never be who they were
or whatever. It widely depends on the player,
too. All right. Well, what are your thoughts
on the Chiefs game? The communication between
Mahomes and the receivers isn't there where it
needs to be. The line was still having lots of
trouble. Josh Simmons is fine. But then we started
having trouble elsewhere. Yeah, Taylor. Jawan
Taylor, again. Yeah, uh -huh. Stupid penalties.
And then not capitalizing. You know, you'll get,
like, a great run back, and then you can't do
anything with it. Or, you know, you throw the
ball 20 yards, 30 yards down the field, and then
you stall out. Yeah. Just that kind of. That's
inexcusable. Yeah, that's. I got to believe that
they spend a lot of time working on. keeping
drives going, sustaining the drive, and then
it just crumbles. Oh, I know. They just don't
seem ready. I know that it's week one, and a
lot of players haven't played in the third quarter
and fourth quarter yet. Well, Hollywood seemed
to start getting in rhythm towards the end of
the game. He did. He almost got 100 yards. Yeah.
Juju looked great. He did. Okay. Thornton didn't
seem to do a whole lot. No, he did okay, though,
I mean, on his debut. Yeah. He did okay. He had
a couple of catches. But I see him getting better.
And I hope Jalen Royals comes back soon. Yeah,
he's got knee, I think. It's knee, I believe,
yeah. And I think that when you see these guys
come in, you're not going to see them gel. I
don't think you're going to see them really until
down the stretch. The thing is, they've got to
keep their head above water. Yeah. For a while
now. and also especially for Rice to come back.
Yeah, yeah. Once Rice comes back, if he's good
and completely healthy, you're going to see a
completely different offensive team. True, true.
In the meantime, though, I would really like
to see them get a consistent running game going
because that's going to help in so many ways.
That's the problem, and I don't get it. Yeah.
Okay, I was talking yesterday or the day before
about this to my boss, the big boss, and this
is true. Okay. You start off brutalizing the
defenses with a bigger guy. Yeah. So you go out
there with Hunt. I don't care if he gets one
yard of carry. You pound, pound, pound. You wear
them down. You put Pacheco in there. He's a little
bit faster, but still has some power. And then
in the fourth quarter, you put in Mitchell to
fucking smoke him. I'm not seeing that continuity
at all. It's like they're not even trying. Yeah,
it's just kind of like, well, we're just going
to act like we're going to give this to you,
but we don't expect you to do anything. And I'm
tired of hearing the excuse of, well, it's a
pass -oriented offense. Okay, pass -oriented,
not pass -exclusive. Yeah, exactly. And, you
know, I know that they consider a pass under,
like, seven yards or something to run. Well,
that's not true. No. The physicality isn't there.
As you said, it's the offensive line wearing
out the defensive line and some of the linebackers.
It's just the relentless pounding. By the fourth
quarter, you see that 220 -pound running back
coming at you. You just don't want to hit him.
No. You're going to make yourself hit him, but
you really don't want to. Yeah. Well, I've always
been a fan of the running game. Me too. So I
would say establishing that run is always a good
idea, especially now, like right now. It also
gives Mahomes the option of running by us running.
Yes. Yeah. You have the blockers in place. If
he's open on the right side, he's got a first
down almost every time. The only reason I can
think where they wouldn't be doing this is imagine
they're running down and the defense is piled
up in the middle to stop the run. And then you
audible to a pass, but now you've got that rush
right up the middle. And maybe they don't think
their interior line can handle it right now.
That could be. An idea. Show him my tear or whatever.
Yeah, right left guard, I think. Yeah, yeah.
What are you thinking about him? Are you thinking
that he's going to? He's doing a lot better,
yeah. I think this is definitely a better spot
for him to tackle. Yes. And I can see him improving.
Mm -hmm. So. I think that that's what this season
is in a large part. Yeah, they still plan on
winning the Super Bowl, but they just like getting
people accustomed to their roles and comfortable
in them. And that would be actually a good thing
internally is to say, let's quit concentrating
on winning the Super Bowl every year to the exclusion
of building for the future. Because what good
is it to win it right now if the next year we
go 0 -17 and everyone hates us? Which brings
me to Travis Kelsey. All right. First thing.
Yeah. He admitted he was distracted last season.
Yes. I hate that. Oh, yeah. Okay. I'm glad he
admitted it, but I hate that he was. Well, all
last season it was all fucking pretty. Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm fine. No
distraction here, ready to play, and we didn't
see him. And so many people are just fine with
him lying. That's what they expect, and they're
okay with it. I'm not. I'm not okay with him
lying about whether he was distracted and what's
going on. I'm the same way. I think that he helped
cost us a championship. Yeah. Yeah. Just everywhere.
All last season where he didn't quite show up,
put pressure and strain on everybody else. And
that all added up by the end of the season. A
little bit better blocking in that Super Bowl
went a long way too. I think subconsciously by
the Super Bowl, a number of the players on the
Chiefs were kind of tired of carrying Kelsey's
ass while he got all the limelight and all the
attention. Whether they were thinking that out
loud in their head, I think that was part of
it. It was like, screw him. Look what he isn't
doing for us. And okay, so I get to this. And
write in, 2douches at mail .com if you don't
like this. I'll read it. I don't care. Hate mail
goes to the front. Kelsey should have stepped
down last year. I think so. At least put himself
second string. Yeah. Yeah. That would have been
unheard of, wouldn't it? Yeah. For an NFL team.
It's like, no, no, you can't decide that. No.
Wow. The thing is, is if you are distracted,
you're not there to win a championship. You're
acting like you are. And it's carrying over to
everyone around you. as well. They're getting
distracted because you're distracted. They're
thinking about how you're distracted. You know,
it's friends. Like I was talking to my boss,
my boss said this, it's a really good point,
he said, you think Mahomes can tell him that
maybe he needs to step down? I said, no. No.
It's got to be Reid. Yeah. Or Veach. Yeah. Or
both. If Mahomes is too close to him, he'll never
do that. Yeah. That would wreck the relationship
they have, so that would kind of be an all -or
-nothing situation where Mahomes would have to
be ready to say goodbye to their relationship.
I mean, but it's not going to happen. No. I mean,
number one, Mahomes isn't going to do that. Number
two, the Chiefs aren't. No. No. Well, I got some
bullet points if you want to go into that. Love
the bullet points. Okay. All right. Excuse me.
This year, the year coming up, the following
year, will the NFL finally take off overseas?
You know, I think so. All the signs are pointing
that way. It's in the new Madden NFL game. They're
starting to emphasize international stadiums.
I think you can play some of your games overseas
now as a part of a regular season in the video
game. It's being normalized. I kind of don't
like that term. They're getting us used to the
idea in a lot of different ways. I think it's
going to happen a lot sooner than we think. I
agree. It seemed like it used to be that we would
kind of be kept aware of things that were developing
and as they go, but anymore things that just
kind of get sprung on us. It's like, oh! Here's
what this is now. Now it's brand new and you've
got to deal with it. It's like everybody's going
to have to buy converter boxes again if you watch
over the air channels. I know, isn't that messed
up? Yep, they're changing it again. I guess somebody
wanted to sell digital converter boxes and they
say, hey, make a law so I can sell a shit ton
of these things. Yeah, that's all that goes on.
It's like they wanted to sell the channels when
they went digital. Yep. They did. Look at all
that bandwidth we could be making money off of.
We did. And we got to jump through hoops just
to get free TV. Yeah. Oh, well. Yep. All right,
next one. Will it be as big overseas as it is
in America? Yeah, in a different way, but yeah,
I think it will. Pretty much everywhere around
the world, people know how to be fans and how
to climb on board and have a good time. So it'll
look a little different from the way Americans
do it, but it'll be the same type of devotion
and fandom. Yeah, I think it will be. I think
you're right. Yeah. Should the NFL try expansion
in Canada? Wow. You know, I really don't think
so because that would really put them in an adversarial
position with the CFL. Yeah. And there's so many
better ways that the NFL and the CFL can get
along and feed each other players. I agree. That
any kind of direct competition, I think, is a
bad idea. So I would like to see them leaving
the CFL alone and Canada alone. Yeah. We're not
going to have a Friday night game for a while.
Remember how the Chiefs and the Chargers played
Friday night? Because Labor Day came so soon,
there weren't high school football games that
night. Yeah, so they're like, it'd be a good
time to have a stand -alone, and let's have the
runners -up, the Chiefs, play a division rival
who's on the upswing. Yep. But it was at the
broadcast, it's like the Football Broadcast Act
or something. It was 1961, anyways, when they
passed this act. They're not going to broadcast
professional football games on Friday nights
to maintain the sanctity of high school football.
And then the NFL also leaves Saturday alone until
college football is over, and then they start
putting Saturday games on. Yeah, as soon as it's
over and decided and they're waiting for the
bowl games, you're going to see Saturday games
all over. So that was an unusual Friday game.
They're doing pretty good, aren't they? That
was maybe one. Yum. Yeah, because I expected
to eat half of that sandwich, not the whole thing,
so please. I didn't realize there was cheese
on it. I'm sorry. I tried to. Weird things happen
to me when I eat dairy. Next time I'll have to
read the menu a little bit better. What about
expansion into Mexico? Yeah. I like that. I think
that would be a great idea. They've had some
games in Mexico City. Enormous stadium there,
just enormous. And there are a number of other
places around the country where they could probably
support a team. And it's got the benefit of not
being such a dramatic time zone change if you
just go north and south. I would say Mexico is
a pretty good expansion place. I would agree.
And I think the NFL is also going to try to make
their expansion into places where people who
live in that country are likely to wind up on
the team. You know, if it's a country where,
like, not just single male, but like in the South
American country where everybody's a pig meat,
they're never going to be on an NFL team, so
they're not going to get a team. They're not
worried about it. That's the kind of thing I'm
talking about. I agree. I think Mexico, there
are such rabid fans down there of sea soccer
that once it catches on, you're going to have,
I don't know, they might even be more rabid than
we are here in America. I think that's the best
thing that the NFL can do is expand into Mexico
immediately. I think the physicality of it really
appeals to certain cultures. It definitely appeals
to American culture. We like to see the NASCAR
cars. bumping into each other. We like hockey
fights. We like the physical part of the sport.
Hockey fights are the best. So there are a lot
of other cultures that, you know, they're really
okay with that level of physicality of the sport.
I think Mexico is a good choice. I think so,
too. I think they'll just love it. Well, I mean,
they already do, but I think if you give them,
like, the Mexico Marauders or something. Yeah,
don't have some ridiculous stereotypical lingering
name like the, oh my god, the Mexican Bandidos.
The Bandidos. Oh my god, they would probably
shoot you if you suggested that. That would be
so awful. But don't put it up to a fan vote or
it'll wind up being something like that. Yes,
no, it would. What was that? There was some car
ferry over in England, I think, and they let
the public decide whether to be named. The number
one choice was Bodie McBoatface. And that's what
they named it. So you don't let the public decide.
I'll hire a private cat and we're in. I'm not
riding on Bodie McBoatface. It's like, what was
it, Men in Black when Tommy Lee Jones said, a
person is very smart. You can reason with a person.
People together are stupid. Oh, God. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. And not just a little. Yeah. No,
the masses are asses. That's a good way to put
it, too. Yep. I didn't write that one. I'm just
carrying it on. Yep. All right. Okay, I saved
this because I want to talk about the Buffalo
-Valtimore game. Okay. What was big surprises
from last week's games? And we can go into all
the other ones that surprised you, but I want
to end with the Buffalo game. Individual games,
I was pretty surprised that Indianapolis, would
they just clobber Miami? Yeah. That was kind
of a surprise. That was. I was surprised at how
many close games they were, even badly played
games. Badly played games seemed to be close,
yeah. C .D. Lamb having bricks for hands, that
was a big surprise. Yeah, that was a big surprise.
How about Green Bay beating the shit out of Detroit?
Yeah, yeah. I thought that was going to be a
close competitive game. Remember, we both thought
that Detroit were on the decline. Yeah. Jared
Goff is getting older, and he wasn't a guy anymore.
They desperately, they are desperately needing
that guy. Yeah, they traded, they lost Ben Johnson
to be head coach of Chicago. Yeah, yep. Which
looked like he was no good last night until,
I don't know, the last three minutes. Yeah. Okay,
I want to go into... I think we pretty much rattled
off the biggest surprises right there. One other
surprise. The new virtual first down measurement,
I was surprised it worked so well. I know. I
love that. It's immediate. It's just kind of
like, yeah, they got it, okay, put it down. That's
what's nice. You don't have to wait for them
to stand around and talk and gesture. It's like,
here it is, that's it. I'm telling you, they
lost so many viewers during that time. People
are like, I can never watch a full fucking play
because something happened. If it's not your
team, you're leaving. You're like, yeah, I ain't
taking this. I got other stuff I got to do. Did
they change the rule on the number of challenges
you can have in a game? Because in the Denver
game, I remember them saying that's the fourth
challenge that Sean Payton has thrown. Now, it
used to be you would get a third if you won your
first two. If you won your first two. But I guess
now you get a fourth if you win your first three.
I'll have to look that up, but okay. Or maybe
it's two challenges per half. I don't know. I'll
have to look up. I didn't see that in any of
the rules changes that I looked up before the
beginning of the season. But unless the guy misspoke,
he said fourth challenge flag. And he had to
have won the previous three, I guess. He would
have had to, I guess, because I thought you lose
one and that's it, game over. Yeah. Oh, well,
okay. The big surprise for me was I cannot believe,
okay, well, number one, Buffalo fans, they can
talk about the Bills Mafia all they want. No.
No, no, no, no. They're not even close to Chiefs.
They fucking left. Yeah. Half of that stadium
almost left. That's crazy. Opening weekend and
they're walking out on their own team. Close
game. Crazy. I mean, 25 points to Josh Allen
is not that much. If you had like a, I don't
know, a fucking Matt Blunden in there or something,
or I don't know, you know, a Matt Castle or some
shit, yeah, you'd probably leave. But we're talking
about... Someone that's probably going to be
a Hall of Famer. I would imagine so. He would
have to screw up pretty bad not to be. Yeah,
he would. And, you know, if there's like an ice
storm coming, I get it, leave early. But seriously,
to walk out on your team like that. No, they
were being little bitches is what they were doing.
They were being little bitches. They were like,
hey, you guys aren't winning, so fuck you, I'm
leaving. They were not supporting their team
like they're supposed to. Maybe reconsider if
you really want to be a season ticket holder
if that's what you're going to do. Exactly. I'm
telling you, those people should pull their fucking
tickets. They should say, no, you're not a real
fan. We don't need you guys here. That's probably
going to come eventually is when you buy a season
ticket. You guarantee to fill that seat until
the game's over. And since they have face recognition
in all NFL stadiums, they can look and see who's
sitting in your seat, if anybody. And they can
single anybody out and say, you are out of your
seat 78 % of the time. That makes the stands
look too empty. So we're not renewing your season
ticket next year. We're going to sell it to somebody
who guarantees to be in their seat a lot more.
It's coming. It'll be here. The thing I want
to point out is this right here, a couple of
things. Okay, Buffalo. No, I'm sure that's coming.
Okay, Buffalo was excited about their win. They
gave up 170 yards to Travis Henry. Yeah. They
gave up 70 yards to Lamar Jackson. Well into
the twos. And they gave up 40 points. And they're
ecstatic about that showing. They should be grateful
they got away with a win. But really, really
worried about their offense, their defense. Their
defense, yeah. And Bill's Mafia, shut your fucking
mouth. Shut your fucking mouth. You guys should
be ashamed. Zay Flowers torched him pretty good.
Oh, he hit. That was fun to watch. That was fun
to watch because he was everywhere. I mean, you
just see that hand. He's like, oh, he got another
one. See a hand again. Oh, got another one. I've
been a fan of his ever since his foot went over
the line last year. When he didn't wear white
shoes. When he didn't wear white shoes. And he
still doesn't. No. Oh, well. All right. My next
one. I mean, both teams are on notice after those
dismal. Yeah. Performances. Yeah. When I watch
them, I'm like, you know, go Chiefs. You know,
if these two are your main competition, I'm okay
with that. Although early in the game, I did
catch myself thinking, the way I saw the Chiefs
perform, they would be outscored so badly by
either one of these teams. You see, I could think
like that too, but then I think of their defense
and how bad it was. And I think the Chiefs would
keep up with them just fine. Yeah, yeah. I guess
I was just feeling gloomy. Well, it was easy
to do after that. I mean, they were like Keystone
Cops. Yeah, there was not just, I mean, it wasn't
bad play calls. It was bad execution of the play
they called. Yeah. A little more than you would
normally expect in a week one game. That's kind
of my point. Here's what I say about this. I'd
better see massive improvement on that second
game. Heck yeah. Even if we don't win against
the Eagles, I want to see a much better play.
Yeah, and if not, then I don't know. Yeah. An
0 -2 start isn't necessarily anything. Not for
these guys. Yeah, but 0 -2 playing badly. That's
another thing. Yeah. Your pedigree is only going
to take you so far. Yeah. So, okay. We're in
agreement on all that. All right, next one. Should
Gardner Minshew be arrested for assault when
the camera catches him in those horrible booty
shorts? Yes. I agree. That's a crime against
everyone's retinas. It is. It is. Especially
with the porn stash he's got. Oh, gosh, yeah.
That just enhances it on creepy and weird. I
never want to see Gardner Minshew eating a pickle.
That would just be disgusting. With fig leaves
all around him. I can see him right now. Oh my
gosh. Pickle disappeared. It's back out again.
It's a happy pickle. Look at that pickle. It's
quite a wreck. Oh my God. All right. Okay. And
moving on. Thank you. Yes. What is the face of
football food -wise? What would you say is a
go -to? Is it nachos? Is it wings? Is it good
old cheeseburgers? You know, I'm a little out
of touch. I haven't been to a game in so long.
I would think it would be nachos, especially
this early in the season. Okay, at the game,
nachos. Yeah, at the game, yeah. Tailgating,
brisket, and wings. Yeah, I would say that's
pretty much. I mean, it used to just be wings,
but now you see everybody in their huge portable
pits doing briskets. Yeah, the game is really.
It was really elevated. It used to be burgers
and hot dogs were fine. And if you had beans,
you're like, pretty cool. And then brats were
the big thing. And then chickens. But yeah, now
the more complex and difficult things to cook
is pretty common. Because it's a way to flex
to everyone around you. Like what I can do. Yeah,
you've got your own slicer and generator. You're
over there slicing up the brisket. And that is
another reason that I'm pretty positive the Chiefs
are going to move to Kansas, their new stadium,
is because that's the only way that you can break
the tailgating tradition and make people start
paying for it. Yes. Because that is the future
of tailgating at all these places. They're tired
of the liability insurance, people suing because
they got hurt or a car got dinged. So they're
going to do what Cleveland's doing, is have a
tailgating area, and you pay a season pass to
have access to it, and it is tightly controlled.
That's what tailgating is going to be, and it's
going to be take it or leave it. It's already
started with your article about Cleveland Browns.
Yeah. It's already started. If they tried to
enforce it right now at Arrowhead, everyone would
just laugh at them and do what they're doing
anyway. But if it's a brand -new stadium in a
new location, they can make it work. and they
can rake in tons of money in addition to not
having to pay so much liability claims. I agree.
Yeah. Good point. What is the toughest division
in the NFL? Ooh. I'm going to say the West. I'm
going to say AFC West right now, yeah, because
they showed that the head coaches in the AFC
West have ten Super Bowl wins between them. Yeah.
That's pretty good. Of course, six of them are
Andes. Yeah. Well, I mean, not wins, but appearances
at least. Appearances, yeah. But I'm trying to
think. Well, we went from a division of slouches,
except for the Chiefs, to the premier division.
And the reason is because of the Chiefs. Yeah.
They're getting tired of losing to them. So,
number one, they hire a coach who's either been
to the Super Bowl and won it or been to the Super
Bowl and could have won it. Yeah. And that's
where you get Jim Harbaugh, who's been to the
Super Bowl and lost to his brother. But, I mean,
it wasn't a blowout by any means. He was okay,
but he had a couple of fair quarterbacks, not
the best. So Jim Harbaugh is definitely in his
national championships in college. He's no slouch.
Yeah, it's a whole championship -winning tradition
from beginning to pro. That's the AFC's steeped
in that. Pete Carroll is a head coach, two Super
Bowls, one win. Yeah. And then after that, you
have Sean Payton, who has a couple of Super Bowls
and one win. So yeah, I mean, they had to beef
up their teams and who they have running them
because of the Chiefs. And that's why it's the
toughest division in football. Yeah, I'd say
right now it is. Yeah. There's other ones that
could challenge, and I'm sure that someone will.
It'll be close, if not, might take it over. But
we'll see what happens with that. A couple NFC
ones look like they're going to shape up to be
a pretty good fight. Yeah, yeah. I would imagine
the NFC East would be my pick. Disregard the
Giants, but I think the Eagles, Cowboys, and
Commanders could all really slug it out to the
end. That's the East that I'm talking about.
That's the division I think that, I mean, you
could make a case, and it could be the toughest
division right now. If the Cowboys keep playing
like they are, then we might have to give it
to them. But right now, I'm going to go ahead
and go with the West. Yeah, yeah. Unless one
of the teams in the AFC West starts to fade and
has no realistic chance, then we might reevaluate.
Yeah, but right now we expect all of them to
be 500 or above. Yeah. Which is quite a feat.
Yeah, that doesn't happen too often. Yeah. I
think this year and the year we're going to see
it happen, you're going to see like a 10 -16.
Not even close. Wow, that'd be interesting. But
now that I said that, you watch. Everyone's going
to be mediocre. The algorithm at NFL headquarters
is spinning into action and saying, hey, we can't
make this guy right. Nope, nope, nope. All right.
If the NFL came out with Chiefs beer, would you
buy some? Yeah. I would, too. I wouldn't drink
it. I'd keep it. I wonder if it would be a red
beer. I would hope so. Like an amber or red beer.
An amber or red, yeah. You could call it Chief's
Blood. Have a six -pack where three are red and
three are gold. Oh, there we go. That would be
perfect. They could call it the red and gold
bar. Yeah. I like that idea. I do, too. Hey,
free idea. Take it, run with it. Yeah, there
you go. And finally, if the NFL were a car, what
type of car would it be? Ooh. I'm going to say
a Tesla because as shiny as it looks, when you
get up close, sometimes it's like it loses its
luster. Yeah, yeah. I would say along those same
lines like a Range Rover because it can plow
you over and wreck your whole day, but it also
breaks pretty easily. That's actually probably
a better one. Okay, we'll go with that. Okay.
All right. I've got some game analysis. You got
something you want me to go into that? I've got
stuff left over from last week mostly. All right,
cool. I had the SAC leaders. Okay. Since 2000.
They didn't start. Officially counting sacks
until 1982. I know, isn't that weird? Yeah, they
would talk about them endlessly, but it wasn't
the staff that was kept. That still freaks me
out. But they did go back to like 1961. Oh, and
re -looked at them? Yeah. But I wrote down the
ones from 2000 on, and then I'll mention some
of the highlights from the earlier ones. Okay.
So in the year 2000, the sack leader was Leroy
Glover. New Orleans Saints. Okay. Played 17 games
and 16 sacks. Okay. The very next year, 2001,
Michael Strahan. Oh, I'm sorry. I got it backwards.
17 sacks and 16 games. Oh, okay. Back then they
were only playing 16. Oh, yeah. Okay, Michael
Strahan, 22 and a half sacks in 16 games. In
2002, Jason Taylor. Remember him? Yeah. Big tall
guy. Yeah, I do. 18 .5 sacks in 18 games for
the Dolphins. 2003, Strahan again, 18 .5 in 16.
Maybe Giants, I forgot. 2004, Dwight Freeney
from the Colts. I remember him. 16 sacks in 16
games. He was a terror. Yes, he was. 2005. Oakland
Raiders, Derek Burgess. He was 16 and 16. Derek
Burgess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember him a little
bit. I kind of vaguely remember him. I remember
him a little bit. Yeah. It's nice to see Oakland
Raiders. Yeah, it is. Yep. They're still Oakland
to me. Yeah. And I still hate them. 2006, Sean
Merriman from the San Diego Chargers. Oh, jeez.
I remember him, too. 17 sacks in 12 games. That's
pretty good production. Wow, that's real good
production. Yeah. I was reminded yesterday that
when the AFL started, the Chargers were in Los
Angeles. That is where they started. And then
they moved to San Diego. Yeah, they put them
in Los Angeles to compete with the NFL team that
was there. I think it was the Rams at the time.
Oh, I think I remember that. Yeah, you know what?
Okay, so then they're back home now. Yeah, that's
why the Dallas Texans, which later became the
Chiefs, were put in Dallas was because the NFL
was going to put a team there. delaying it, and
as soon as the AFL said, we'll put one there,
then the NFL said, okay, we are too, and they're
the Cowboys. Yeah. And they did the same thing
in Minnesota. The AFL was going to put a team
in Minnesota, so the NFL stepped in and gave
them the Vikings to shut us out. Yeah. It was
a real war back then. Yeah, it was a war back
then. It was amazing. Let's see, 2007, Jared
Allen for the Kansas City Chiefs, 15 and a half
sacks in 14 games. Wow. I didn't remember that
he was sack leader that year. I didn't either
in 14 games, 15 and a half. That's pretty good.
2008, Demarcus Ware for the Cowboys, 20 sacks
in 16 games. I didn't know Ware got that many.
2009, Elvis Dumerville. Remember Elvis? Oh, yeah,
yeah, I sure do. Denver Broncos, 17 sacks in
16 games. Yeah, he was a beast. 2010, Demarcus
Ware again for the Cowboys, 15 .5 in 16. 2011,
here's Jared Allen again with 22 in 16 games,
but this time it's for the Vikings. He was no
longer a team. Oh, that's right. They traded
him, yep. 2012, J .J. Watt, 20 .5 for the Houston
Texans. 2013, Robert Mathis for the Colts with
19 .5. Okay. Colts had some pretty decent defenses
there for a while. They really did, and they
may have another really good defense on their
hands too. We shall see, yes. 2014, Justin Houston,
22 sacks for the Chiefs. I remember that year.
We didn't do anything else well, but he sacks
people. 2015, J .J. Watt again with 17 .5 for
the Texans. 2016, Vic Beasley with 15 .5 for
the Falcons. Wow. Okay. 2017, Chandler Jones
with 17 sacks for the Cardinals. Okay. I remember
the Chandler part. Yeah. Yep. 2018, Aaron Donald
for the Rams with 20 .5. 2019, Shaquille Barrett
for the Buccaneers with 19 .5. Okay. 2020, TJ
Watt with 15 for the Steelers in 15 games. And
then next year, also TJ Watt with 22 .5 in 15
games. Wow. 2022 was Nick Bosa, 18 .5 in 16 games
for the Niners. 2023, TJ Watt for the third time,
19 sacks in 17 games for the Steelers. I didn't
realize TJ was so dominant. Yeah, a lot of sacks,
a lot of sacks. In 2024, Trey Hendrickson, 17
.5 for the Bengals. That's why he wanted the
big contract. He said, I'm sack leader now. I
want the money. Hey, I'm happy. Somebody sawing
my leg off. Sorry about that. Hang on. Did you
just saw someone else's leg off? No, thank you.
But looking back over the older stats. 1978,
Al Baker of the Lions had 23 sacks in the season.
Wow. That's pretty good. Yeah, it is. Didn't
Strahan have the record? Michael Strahan? Yeah,
22 and a half, I think. That's what I was thinking.
Then Derek Thomas in 1990 had 20 in 15 games,
and he was the sack leader that year. Wow. And
in 1993, Neal Smith... was the stack leader with
15 and 16 kids. Isn't that something, those two?
They're all, I mean, I love the way they operated.
One or the other is going to get you. Yeah, pretty
much. I'm hoping Carl Altus and Jones can play
more on the same, to where they can do something
like that. Yeah, coordinated attack. Coordinated
attack. Yeah. But the coordinated attacks...
aren't really done by the linebackers so much
anymore like they used to be. The game has changed
so much where it's not really – it doesn't happen
like that, but I'm sure they can do things a
little bit differently. But anyhow, go ahead.
Well, that was it for the sack leaders, but I
do have a list of forgotten quarterbacks of the
2000s. All right, let's hear it. All right. Chad
Pennington. Remember him for the Jets? Oh, yeah.
Yeah. He couldn't stay healthy. That was pretty
much his thing. And he did play well when he
was in there. Yeah. Yeah. Here's another good
one. Seneca Wallace for the Seahawks. Remember
him? I remember that guy. He wound up pretty
much being a perennial backup QB because he could
scramble. I sat on a plane with him one time.
Oh, nice. He was nice as pie. Really, really
nice. Let's see. Remember Jesse Palmer for the
Giants? Yes. 0 -3 in three starts. That's his
career. Wow. Damn. Achilles Smith for the Bengals.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, he couldn't stay healthy. No?
Yeah, I remember he got a knee blown out in his
first year. That was terrible. Here's another
good name for the pass. Jay Fiedler from the
Dolphins. Oh, yeah. He averaged 12 starts per
year in five years. Wow. 12 starts in five years.
That's a lot. Yeah. Not so good. Jay Fiedler.
Sean King of the Bucks. Remember him? He went
to the NFC Championship game as a rookie and
then never climbed that hill again. Sean King.
I don't even know if I remember him. I kind of
remember him. I remember him being a little bigger
and taller than a lot of quarterbacks. Okay.
Oh, well. All right. All right. Gus Farratt.
Oh, yeah. Remember Gus Farratt? Yeah. Vikings,
Commanders, and Dolphins. He averaged nine starts
per year during his career. That's more than
I thought of. Yeah. But he was never the full
season starter. Wow. And he just became a perennial
backup. Okay. Which, you know, if it's the choice
between being a perennial backup and not having
a career in the league, a lot of guys would be
okay with being a backup. You're right. Yep.
A .J. Feely. Oh, yeah. He played for the Eagles.
In his 12 -year career, he only started 18 games.
Wow. For a name that was so prolific, I mean,
I believe it, but it seems like he would have
started more than that. Yeah. Okay. That's like
starting three games every two years. Damn. You
know what? I'm sure his check didn't bounce.
Yeah. Charlie Batch played for the Steelers and
the Lions. He averaged seven games and five starts
per year in his 12 -year season. Charlie Batch
was actually really good for a while. I remember
he had a story like his brother was murdered
or something. Yeah, he had a good origin story
for sure. He never threw for more than 13 touchdowns
in a season. I can believe that. Yeah, he wasn't
really that kind of quarterback anyway. Did he
have Sanders also, though? Did he have Barry
Sanders still? I think so. He just gave the ball
to him and said, hey, see this ball? Put it over
there. Okay. Here's another good name for the
pass. Joey Harrington. Oh, my gosh. Joey Herringbone.
Played for the Lions and the Dolphins. Over the
course of a month. Over the course of his career,
he has more interceptions than touchdowns. I
can believe that. More losses than wins. I can
believe that. And in 2003, he led the league
with 22 interceptions. I can believe that. Joey
was great in college, couldn't make the transition.
And that happened. Yeah, a lot. Here's another
fun name, Chris Winkie. Winky. Remember Winky?
Yeah, I remember Winky. He was a 49er. Went 1
-14 his rookie season. Oh, yeah. And then in
the next five, in the next six years, he only
had five more starts. Yeah. And he went 1 -4
in those. So his overall career was 2 -18. No
wonder you didn't even see him as a backup. No.
No, he took his money and went to insurance school.
Yeah. He's selling insurance right now. Yeah,
the vague impression I remember from his career
was you put any pressure on him and he just starts
doing stupid things. Yeah, that's all you do.
You spit in his face. Yeah. All right, J .P.
Lossman for the Bills. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's
kind of vague. He went 10 and 23 in his first
five seasons. Okay. Then he threw 19 touchdowns
and 3 ,000 yards his next and final year starting.
That's respectable. Yeah. He started that year,
but that was the last year he started. All of
a sudden he was done. They must have gotten somebody
else. I guess so. Yeah. All right. Another Bills
quarterback, Trent Edwards. I remember him. Started
15 games in his first two seasons, never went
to the playoffs, no more than 11. Playoffs, playoffs.
Never more than 11 touchdowns in the season.
That's pretty pedestrian. That is very. That's
not really pedestrian, that's an old person in
a walker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's someone
in the last stages of ALS. Yeah. Sage Rosenfels
for the Texans. He was another that was really
tall but didn't help him much. He was a mess,
though. Started 12 games in his whole career,
went 6 -6. Him being 500, I find quite surprising.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he didn't have a whole
lot to offer, honestly. He really didn't. Former
Browns quarterback, Charlie Fry. Oh, yeah, wow.
Fry with an E on the end. Yep. In five years,
he played in 26 total games, started 23 of those,
and in 2006 threw 10 touchdowns to 17 interceptions.
So they didn't use him much, and when they did,
he didn't do well. So his brother Glenn had a
better career. Definitely. Yeah, Glenn Frey.
He should have picked up guitar like his brother.
Yeah, he should have, yes. Bruce Gradkowski for
the Bucs. Yes, yeah, yeah. Gradkowski. With a
name like that, you would think a Steelers linebacker,
don't you? Yeah, or Gronkowski or something like
that. The Steelers have a player named Squaronic
or something like that. Wow, try to say that
when you're drunk. That should be their sobriety
test. It's like, hey, start saying the names
of all the players on the Steelers roster. Here
we go. Babble snatch. Babble snatch. Get ready
to say that. Babble snatch. I'm going to turn
our game down a little bit. I'm overloading.
As soon as you say babble snatch, that's it.
You hear a cuffs. Okay. Brad Kowski. He went
3 -8 in 2006. Never started more than four games
per year after that. Okay. I can believe that.
Finished as a backup in Cincinnati. I can believe
that. Yeah. And then last but not least, Chad
Hutchinson. Oh, yeah. Of the Cowboys slash Bears.
Uh -huh. Went 2 -7 as a starter in Dallas, then
1 -4 as a starter in Chicago, and then that was
it. His proud family that settled Hutchinson,
Kansas. Yeah. Yeah. I really thought Chad Hutchinson
was around longer than that. I thought he was,
too. His name's easier to remember. That's 1
-7 Hutchinson. I've got a couple of games I'd
like to go over, if that's okay? Sure. All right.
The Bills beat the Ravens. We talked a little
bit about this. 41 -40. Both teams should be
worried. Derrick Henry, 169 yards on the ground.
Yeah. Lamar Jackson, 70 yards on the ground.
Well over 200 yards running. And that's how Lamar
Jackson says he doesn't want to be a scrambler
anymore. He wants to be a pocket passer. And
they still left him 70 yards worth. Oh, I know.
Yeah. He said he didn't want to do it. And I
agree with him. If you want to stay healthy,
you probably do have to make that transition.
But listen to this. Ravens average rushing was
8 .2 yards per attempt. Damn. 8 .2 yards. That's
almost a first down. Yes. Wow. And Buffalo was
happy about that win. I'm more happy about the
Chiefs' loss than they should be about their
win. Yeah, it's a weird situation in Buffalo
that you had a lot of fans leaving. Yet at the
same time, the team was real happy about what
happened. I know. Yeah, how could you? A quarter
of the stadium, if not more, leaves. People were
booing. People were mad. And it was a horrible,
really kind of a horrible atmosphere. And then
also when they won, it seems like everything's
okay, even though all these stats I just mentioned
went on. It's like being a dumbass and setting
your house on fire, but then you're high -fiving
yourself because you saved your TV remote. Yes.
I did it. I did it. I did it. I'm so happy with
me. All right. The next one I'd like to go into,
I mean, I think that's pretty self -explanatory.
Yeah. Bills and Ravens are both suspect right
now. Yeah, they definitely are. Yeah. And if
you have a defense like that, you're not going
to sniff any type of a championship game. No.
No, no, no. I would say out of the ones that
have been there a lot lately, This next one I'm
going to go to, I thought Cincinnati might be
the team that's kind of lurking. Yeah, yeah.
Oh, go ahead. I was going to say, I had high
hopes for Cincinnati to get playing well this
year. They barely beat the Browns. Barely. Listen
to this. Joe Burrow only had 95 yards in the
air. That's nuts. Joe Flacco had 278 yards passing.
And if Cleveland hadn't missed all those kicks,
that would have been a totally different story,
wouldn't it? It would have won, yes. The Bengals
had 141 total yards to the Browns' 327 yards.
Opening game against a division rival. Yeah,
that's another team that just looked like they
weren't ready yet. Like the Chiefs weren't ready.
The Bengals, I think, are going to tighten it
up and play better. The first two, the Bills
and the Ravens, they're going to have to get
a hell of a lot better on defense before they
have anyone convinced. Yeah, they're kind of
lucky they played each other that night because
anybody else in it could have been a massive
blowout. I mean, if it wasn't so, like, 8 .2
yards rushing, I would say, all right, it's just
two really good teams that hate each other playing
each other. But there's stuff that can't be overlooked.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Flaws in defenses. Yes.
Definite flaws. Yep. Yeah. All right. How about
the Steelers 34 and the Jets 32? Rogers had a
solid game. He had 218 yards passing with four
touchdowns. Jets may not be the worst team in
the AFC East. That's probably going to go to
the Dolphins. Yeah, from the first weekend, that
looks like the Dolphins are struggling. I thought
the Jets played pretty well. I thought Justin
Fields looks like he fits in really well there.
He is really kind of looking like he's settling
in that. And that's what they needed. They needed
someone that could guide him on the running aspect
of it as opposed to the throwing. It's a very
delicate balance, and if you don't do it right,
you're not going to win. It seems like he's settling
in and starting to learn some of that. So the
Steelers look to be doing okay, 34 points. They
look way better than the Browns and the Bengals
did. Yeah, they did. The Steelers could be. They
went to the playoffs last year. So they could
again. It wouldn't surprise me with Aaron Rodgers
behind the realm. I mean, if he's having any
type of a season at all, you're going to have
to watch out for him. Yeah, definitely. The Colts
beat down the Dolphins 33 -8. I don't think the
Colts are quite that good, but they're definitely
a decent team. And the Dolphins just look awful.
Well, the Hill chants are happening. They're
saying, oh, he's coming back to Kansas City.
Like we're talking about in the car. If there's
anything left in the tank, the Chiefs are going
to buy it and try to get it. If not, well, I
don't know. You know what? They know stuff we
don't. And they've had opportunities to wheel
and deal for them last year. By the way it looked
and sounded, they did. So why didn't they get
him? Why didn't anyone else? One of our opponents.
Why did Buffalo not call it up and go, hey, we
want Hill. How much is it going to take? Yeah,
the Chiefs were pretty thin at wide receiver
last season too, and they still didn't want Hill
back. It's the kind of thing that if you're a
team that needs to impress your fans and generate.
season ticket sales, then signing Hill is kind
of a good idea. For the Chiefs, they better be
darn sure he's going to be a great contribution
before they use a whole roster spot on him. That's
why I'm not sure if he's going to actually...
Alright, and then finally, the last one I got
is Detroit destroying the Packers 27 -13. Wouldn't
that be the other way around? Oh no, I mean Packers
destroying them. Sorry. Thank you. The Packers
destroyed Detroit. I was getting ready to talk
bad about Detroit. I didn't realize what I said.
Thank you. Detroit's lack of execution and Packers'
efficiency made all the difference in the whole
world. The Packers looked like they were there
and done it before, and Detroit lost. Yeah, it
was really disheartening to see how far the Lions
have regressed. Yeah. Just in an offseason. Dan
Campbell looked embarrassed and should have been
embarrassed. Yeah, yeah. That abysmal performance.
They got a lot of things they got to figure out.
Yeah, it's interesting. I wonder how long it's
going to be before the NFL has some sort of standard
of performance. It's like you can't just go out
there and suck week after week because no one's
going to watch. I know. You've got to get better,
damn it. That's how come they've got the flex
games and all that. They have all these things.
Yeah, that's true. That's the first step. Well,
we're going to give you your own slot. They don't
even kind of suck. Yeah. All right, that's all
I had on that. I just wanted to go over those
games and kind of get your thoughts on them.
I think we're pretty much thinking the same thing.
Yeah. You got something? Who is, let's see, it's...
One of the Watt brothers, is it JJ or TJ that's
in the booth now? I think it might be TJ. Yeah,
whichever one's not playing anymore. JJ's not
playing anymore. Okay. So I watched the game
where he was doing the announcing, and wow, he's
not very good yet. And he kind of reminds me
of how great he was when he started, that he
would go on and on about something that... Okay,
we get it, we get it, we got it 30 seconds ago.
Can you shut up now? He was doing that kind of
thing. And then he was getting indignant, and
he was yelling, and there were a lot of times.
Remember, Tom Brady used to name drop everybody.
This guy was trying to use as many insider slang
terms as he could. try to impress you with, like,
yeah, I was in the league for so long, and I
know all these secret insider words. A lot of
them go through that, too. Yeah. Like, where
they think they've got to name drop, they've
got to use technical terms, inside terms. Yeah.
And it's like, we all know you play. Yes, yes.
Just give us something that we can use. And he
was losing his composure a number of times, too,
so he'll get better, but as is the case with
a lot of former players, it was a pretty rough
start. Well, like Collinsworth, you know, if
he has nothing else to do, he's going to go,
now you see the nickel slot there. Now watch
the way he slides over here. Now what you're
going to see is you're going to see him blocking
for this guy right here. Yep. That's what Watt
needs to do. He needs to start going into some
of these defensive packages and go, as you can
see right here, we have a spy. This guy's going
to spy on the quarterback, and if he gets a run,
he's going to come in on him. This guy is trying
to line up with him and cut him off. You know,
there's so many things that they can say technically
that you and I would be like, oh, wow, cool,
that's why. Good to know that, yeah. And when
he tried to do that, most of what he did was
criticize. Tell them what they were doing wrong.
That's not good. No, no. And that's not the NFL
image either. Everything needs to be positive,
good, fun. I'll bet you they already have words
for you. Yeah, yeah, quit criticizing unless
it's something super obvious and everyone expects
the criticism. Yeah, like someone, I don't know.
Spitting on someone's jersey? Yeah, that. Or
open -hand smacking, if that's okay. Well, I've
got a theory on the open -hand smacking. The
Chiefs aren't getting any favors anymore. Yeah,
I think you're right. They don't want them there.
So you can smack them in the head, especially
Travis Kelsey, no big deal. But you can't spit
on them. Sure. But now they've set the precedent
for this year that an open -handed smack across
the face is not an ejection. And on the other
side of the coin, that player is going to get
fined and disciplined by the league and probably
his team. But just because he wasn't ejected
doesn't mean he's off scot -free. No, no, no,
they can still fight him. And they probably will
because a lot of people pointed it out in the
media especially. Hey, you got a guy that spit
on somebody. Yeah, spitting is a horrible, degrading
act. But so is hitting someone in the face. Yeah,
absolutely. Anything that brings that kind of
negative image to the NFL is going to get addressed.
Neither one of those have any place in the NFL.
No. Neither one of them. Remember Bill Romanowski
used to spit on everybody? Oh, yeah, what a piece
of crap. Garbage. Yeah, they call him the mouth
that poured. Yeah. And he was doing it at the
bottom of all these dog piles. Oh, so he's like
a big and ball biter. Yes, he is. Yeah, yeah.
But eventually he got really cocky and he started
just openly spitting on people after the play
was over. Wasn't this, this was I think in the
80s? Yeah, it was. Yeah, and so the AIDS scare
came into it. It's like, AIDS can be transmitted
through saliva. Yeah, it became a big thing.
That's back when they could look at you and give
it to you. Yeah. Everybody's like running scared.
Or if you looked at a rainbow, suddenly your
ass was three inches across. Yes, that's right.
And you're bending over. Damn it, how do we get
distracted like this? I don't know. We're talking
about Romanowski spinning in open -handed slaps
and stuff. Yeah. What I would have done was I
would have got the equalizer, and that's a cup
of piss, and throw it right in his face. Yeah.
And said, look, I know I'm getting kicked out.
I don't care. Yeah. He deserved it. I remember
last year I was advocating for players to just
start throwing punches. constantly and saying,
hey, I'm trying to punch the ball out. It's not
my fault it landed on his kidneys or in his eye
or between his legs. We saw some of that on the
games where actually someone got punched trying
to get the ball out. I remember last year seeing
someone get punched right in the ribs. He missed
the ball and punched him right in the ribs and
the refs were like, eh, oh well. They didn't
do anything about it last year. So this year
what I would like to see is at the end of every
single play. have like five or six players go
to the refs and lobby for a flag. Yeah. Because
if you let them do it after pass plays, hey,
you can go up there any time and say there was
holding, the offensive line was holding, because
it pretty much is on everybody. Yeah, pretty
much, yeah. So if you're going to let them lobby
for a flag, I want to see the players lobby after
every single play and cause a disruption. And
then they'll say, all right, you guys got to
quit this. You got to knock it off and let us
do our jobs. If you're going to let them keep
making the, hey, man, throw the flag motion,
then do it constantly every single time. But
the thing is, if just one team did it, the officials
would punish them by start making calls against
them. It would have to be both teams doing it
constantly, and they're not going to work together
like that. No. But it would be fun. It would
be. We want to go into some of the games coming
up and kind of analyze them. Okay, let me look
here because I... Printed it off, but like always,
I don't know what the fuck I did with it. Let
me go through this again. Of course I didn't.
Anyhow. Alright, I'm just going to have to go
to the good old internets. Okay, Thursday night
is a good one. Commanders at the Packers. Too
early for a snow game. That would be great, wouldn't
it? I'm going to go with... I'm going to go with
the Packers. I think so, too. Yeah, they've shown
they can do it, and they've got the skill and
the talent. Commanders, really, I don't know
what it's going to take. I'm going to take a
step back this year. Yeah, I'm not sure what
it's going to take for the Commanders to establish
themselves as a threat because I still see them
as a growing team that can go either way. Part
of that's probably because I'm used to the Daniel
Snyder era when all the players wanted to run.
Jaden Daniels has a lot of components there,
and he's shown flashes of brilliance. This coaching
administration that's there right now is going
to have to put the people around him to win.
Yeah, start looking for somebody to work specifically
with him. Give him whatever title you need, quarterback
quality control or whatever. Yeah, whatever.
But, yeah, get somebody in there who can figure
out the turn. Jaden Daniels, as he is now, into
the kind of quarterback who's going to lead the
franchise. Well, it looks like John Gruden is
going to be headed back to the NFL anyhow, so
why not have him be the quarterback guy? And
that would be kind of funny to watch John Gruden
rub everybody's nose in it. Oh, yeah. He ran
my ass out, and here I am again. Here I am right
now. That would be kind of funny. It would be,
because, yeah, they... In my opinion, it looked
to me like they singled him out and made an example
out of him when there's other people, a lot of
other people. Yeah, I think he was the sacrificial
lamb to scare everybody else to getting in line.
Yeah, he was a hand swat. No, no, no. There's
two types. You're familiar with the term escape
goat, which is short for escape goat. And then
there's also the Judas goat. Now the scapegoat
is there to die while you run away from the predator.
So you make your escape at the sacrifice of this
goat. The Judas goat is there to bring the predator
in so you can kill it. So he's Judas to the predator.
Okay, got it. And that's what I think John Gruden
thought he was being. He's like, you used me
as the Judas goat. to bring somebody else to
heel and punish them. Yeah. And I don't like
being the Judas Goat. So I'm going to come back
in the NFL and rub your noses in it. I think
that would be awesome. Yeah, I think so too.
I'm for that. All right. Giants and Cowboys.
Who? I like the Cowboys if they're playing like
they played. Thursday night, I think that they're
going to beat the Giants handily at home. Yeah.
sauce enough in the Cowboys against the Eagles
to know that they're a good team and they're
improving and they got their crap together, at
least for now. I know the meme is that they always
fade at the end of the season, but yeah, CeeDee
Lamb is having trouble. I don't look for that
to continue. No, he won't. I think he's going
to have some stick -em -on -his -fingers on this
game and we're going to get some stuff done.
But another division game right off the bat against
the Giants team that really hasn't been a serious
threat for a long time. No, I know. Dallas is
going to get healthy on them. I think so, too.
And by the way, I like the schedule where they
play a lot of division games right off the bat.
I do, too. And that makes teams have to be ready
right off the bat because these games mean twice
as much as any other game. Yeah. Yeah, if you
get all of your games done. Well, they don't
do that with the Chiefs, and that's because they
really look for a dogfight in the division. Yeah.
Three out of our last four games are division
games. Yes. And they're usually stand -alones.
Yeah, they've learned who wants to watch what,
and they make sure it's on TV. Denver and Kansas
City at 7 o 'clock, don't fuck with it. Yeah,
absolutely. Unless someone has it wrapped up
before then. Right, yeah. Yeah, then they'll
put something else. All right, we both agree,
Cowboys? Yeah, I would say so. Okay. Seahawks
and Steelers. Man, got to give it to the Steelers.
Yeah. The way Aaron Rodgers is playing and the
control he's got on that team. To be honest,
I would love to see the Steelers take that division.
Wouldn't that be awesome? That would be funny
as hell. You talk about some people scratching
their heads and going, what the fuck happened?
What just happened? Yeah, no more kicking those
guys around. Yeah. Well, at least time being.
Yeah. This year, maybe next year. I don't know.
We'll see. Man, how much longer is Mike Tomlin
going to hang out? Yeah, how much longer is Aaron
Rodgers going to hang out? He's what, 42? Yeah.
Mike Tomlin's what, 865? Yeah, yeah. He's been
there forever. Yeah, all in a Steeler. Yeah,
yeah. He's the only one longer than Andy Reid
at his current team. Yeah. And then Mike Tomlin
was never a head coach anywhere else. Yeah, he's
built, I mean, got to be Hall of Famer. I would
think so. Yeah, with all the rings they have.
When he took over for Bill – Cowher. Cowher,
yeah. When he took over for Cowher, he actually
made the team better. He did. He got more out
of them than was something else. And, I mean,
Bill Cowher is a great coach, especially a great
defensive coach. Yeah. We had him here under
Schottenheimer several years. He was fantastic.
So, yeah, Tomlin is definitely a Hall of Famer.
Yeah. How about the Rams and Titans? That right
there I think is going to be a sloppy fist fight.
Yeah, yeah. The Titans are showing flashes. They
have some ability here and there. They haven't
put it together yet, joined the club. Yeah. But
I think the Rams have a little bit of an edge
here, but definitely winnable by the Titans.
I like your idea of a sloppy fist fight, but
I'll go with the Rams, I guess. I'm going to
go with the Rams, too, but just barely. And the
Rams are a very pedestrian team. They are now,
yeah. They're nothing really that fancy about
them. They're just going to fist fight you. They
need an identity, don't they? They do. And I
think their identity is going to come from the
defense, not the offense. That's not a bad idea,
yeah. So we'll see what happens. How about the
Bills at the Jets? Normally, I would be, oh,
the Bills are going to murder them. Not so much
anymore. I don't know. The Jets showed some offensive
firepower. Fields can run. What a coincidence.
So can Lamar Jackson. Reese Hall is doing well.
Yeah, I'm going to give it to the Bills, but
barely. I think I might go with Jets in this
one. You know what? Just because I want Buffalo
to wake up. I don't want Buffalo to be kind of
stumbling and sleepwalking through the season.
I want Buffalo to be Buffalo. I'm going to go
36 -32, the Bills. And they're going to win it
last minute. Josh Allen's going to find somebody
in his own – Again, defensive problems, yeah.
Yes. And you're going Jets? I think I'll go with
the Jets by less than a score. By less than a
score? Yeah, one or two points. I think both
those are very easily obtainable bets. Okay,
how about the Patriots and the Dolphins? Patriots
played well. Dolphins did not. The Patriots are
going to kick them all around, up and down. It's
going to be funny. Tyreek Hill's going to fucking
blow up. He's probably going to punch McDaniels.
Break his glasses. Break his glasses. He's going
to make him dance. Yeah. Dancer, I'm going to
punch you. You're going to be on the sideline
dancing. I want you to tap dance. Do it. Okay.
You know, I've always had a soft spot in my heart
for the Dolphins because my uncle used to live
in Fort Lauderdale, and he was a big Dolphin
fan. So I can't hate on the Dolphins. I'd like
to see them return to prominence. Not anytime
soon. Pretty much in the history of the Dolphins
franchise, they won a crap ton of games, but
they've never been a dominant team for any stretch
of time. Not even Dan Marino. No, no. He got
to the Super Bowl in his rookie season. Yeah.
Never spelled it again. Nope, never. Yeah, and
that's too bad, too. I mean, he had a lot of
teams where they went to the playoffs, but they
exited him. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well how about
the Jaguars at the Bengals? This suddenly looks
interesting, doesn't it? It does. The Bengals,
if they don't get their offense in line, the
Jaguars could take this. I wonder how much damage
was done with Trey Hendrickson's hold in. I wonder
how much damage he did to the team mentally.
Well, you've got to figure there's going to be
some people disgruntled going, you know? This
guy, who the fuck do you think he is? We hold
the team hostage. We can't afford anybody as
it is, and you're doing that shit? I'd be kind
of not happy with the guy at all. I think it's
going to take a very pissed off Cincinnati team
to show well against Jaguars, even though the
Jaguars, I think they're improving. They're working
on their team. They're getting better. Trevor
Lawrence is looking okay. He's looking like Trevor
Lawrence. which is to say he looks just like
he did in college. Yeah. He looks like a guy
that would rather be smoking weed on the beach
side. Yeah. Yeah, I think Cincinnati is going
to struggle against the Jags, and they're going
to have to get very, very angry to win that game.
So I'm going to go Jags by five. Okay. How about
the Niners at the Saints? I don't think either
team really has any kind of compelling reason
they would win. I'm going to go with the Niners
just because of pedigree. That's it. No other
real reason. The Saints did pretty well last
year. All things considered, they did very well
last year. They didn't really have a quarterback,
and they bounced around. I guess I'm still accustomed
to the Saints being kind of irrelevant, but it
doesn't really seem like the Saints are going
to win. Nah. Against the Niners. Nah, I don't
think so. McCaffrey's still out. He probably
will be. Yeah, well, if he's out, yeah. How about
the Browns versus the Ravens? That's a game that
suddenly became an eye -opener. Yeah. I can see
the Ravens definitely winning. But Browns aren't
going to be any kind of pushover or easy W. Not
at all. I'm going to say the Ravens by two points,
and it's going to be another one in the 30s.
It's going to be a higher -scored game. That
game has a special meaning because the Ravens
used to be the Cleveland Browns before they were
moved to Baltimore. So the Browns fans hate the
Ravens because they're the traitors that left.
Even though it wasn't them, it was Art Modell.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, full turnover of everybody
since then. But there's extra special reason
for the hometown to really want to beat the Ravens.
Yeah, and it's always like that. They're like,
they can't wait. So they would love to ruin the
Ravens' season. And they might pull this off,
but I'm going to go with the Ravens just by two
points. Just because, again, of pedigree, that's
it. Yeah, they're the better team right now.
Yeah. How about Lions, Bears and Lions? I think
the Bears might take them. Yeah, I think the
Bears are going to get healthy in this game.
They're going to have a win, and the Lions are
just going to start the downhill slide. Floundering.
Yeah, they're going to reveal themselves as the
flash in the pan, unfortunately. And it's not
for lack of talent, necessarily. It's because
this is just not being used correctly. I think
Dan Campbell's workout is welcome. Yeah, he had,
like, the one thing. and that didn't work, and
now he's got nothing else. So now he's like searching.
Yeah, doesn't seem to have anything else in his
bag of tricks. When that didn't work, he didn't
have another backup answer. He just kind of like,
well, okay. Yeah, yeah, and you're in a playoff
game. Playoff. And you go to your head coach
and say, you know, we're struggling. What are
we going to do? And he's like, I don't know.
Yeah, yeah, that's exactly what it looks like
to me. It's kind of like a shorter shot. That
hurts the team. All the players are going to
go, yeah, we can't win with this guy. Yeah, they
don't have that guy, Detroit Jared Goff, to run
around going, guys, come on, come on, we can
do this. They don't have that guy. I think John
Gruden would fit in there, wouldn't he? He would.
I think John Gruden would be a good addition
to Motown. Yeah, hell yeah. Yeah. He loves the
music there. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if he does
or not. I don't know if he's a rock and roller.
I don't know. I think he's a rocker. I don't
think he's a soul guy. Yeah, probably not. I
think he sings along to ACDC songs. Yeah, his
idea of soul is the Blues Brothers singing Soul
Man. Yeah. I see his car right now. That counts,
right? He's in his car. TNT. I'm dynamite. TNT.
He loves to do the low voice on that. TNT. All
right, next one up. This suddenly became very
interesting because of the first two games, or
the first one game. Yep. Okay, the Broncos versus
the Colts. Yeah. Where is the game? It's at Indianapolis.
Oh, okay. Well. I think I'm going to go with
Denver. They're playing well. They're doing well.
Bo Nix is definitely becoming the guy they need
him to be. I think they're going to trip up the
Broncos. Yeah, I'm not sold on the Colts quarterback
situation being all that settled. As long as
Richardson's there, it's going to be a problem.
Yeah. I just have a sneaking suspicion that the
Colts are going to be much better than people
think. That would certainly be a surprise to
me. I'm still stuck thinking they're mediocre
as well. It'll be a surprise, but we'll see.
I mean, no, no, no, this is on nothing. This
is a gut feeling. That's the most fun way to
do it, isn't it? It is. And not because I want
the Broncos to lose, which I do. I just think
it's early in the season. I just think the Colts
are going to, like, kick a couple people's asses.
Yeah, yeah. Or trip them up. I think this would
be a trip up. Oh, yeah. How about the Panthers
versus the Cardinals? That's actually a pretty
good matchup because anybody could win that.
I'm going to go with the Panthers. I think that
Bryce Young is learning at a rapid rate. I think
he's going to get well even better on the Cardinals.
Even though they lost that first game, I think
he's going to be thirsty to win that second one.
Yeah, and I still view the Cardinals as an uneven,
inconsistent team. Kyler Murray. You never know
which Kyler Murray is going to show up, do you?
You don't have any idea. How about the Eagles?
versus the Chiefs. Yeah, tough, tough, tough,
tough. One arrow head drive. Yeah, but we have
seen that the Chiefs are fully capable of losing
a home opener in a very embarrassing fashion.
Unfortunately, I think I'm going to have to go
with the Eagles in this one. Me too. Because
the Chiefs just aren't ready yet. Okay, let's
say that each of them have eight cylinders. Eight
cylinders. The Eagles are firing off the six
of them. The Chiefs are firing off the three
of them. Yeah. So I think the Eagles, right now
the Eagles are the better team. Excuse me. Yeah,
I think they really are. It's hard to say. It's
hard to swallow. But, yeah, I think they're going
to come in and beat the Chiefs the second time.
I think so, too. How about the Falcons versus
the Vikings? I'm going to go with the Vikings
because I think McCarthy has got what it takes.
I agree. And the rest of the team wasn't that
far removed from where they wanted to be. Well,
the thing that I liked is once McCarthy started
getting his head out together, I'm not going
to say out of his ass, he's new. Once he started
getting his head together, the team responded.
They did. I like that. They were ready for him.
Yeah, they're kind of like, we like this guy.
We're going to fight for him. This one's intriguing.
The Buccaneers versus the Texans in Texas. Yeah,
yeah. I think that Mayfield is going to have
a phenomenal year, and I think he's going to
fucking do some wonders down there. I think he's
going to get 36, 37 points. Wow. Yeah. I think
Texans right in the 20s. Yeah, again, the Texans
strike me as being. Not as inconsistent, but
still inconsistent. Yeah, I just think that Mayfield
is primed to have a great season, and I think
that that team's improved. For the first time
in his career, Baker Mayfield looks happy and
at home. He never really felt that way in Cleveland.
He never really seemed that way in Tampa until
recently. He feels like he's really home. The
year he went to the divisional playoffs, And
almost beat the Chiefs. Yeah. He looked fantastic
in that. Yeah. But then the next year, he had
that shoulder injury, and everyone was mad at
him because he wasn't performing. The guy could
hardly fucking walk. Yeah, it's so weird that
they were so quick to give up on him knowing
he was injured, and they were so married to Deshaun
Watson, even knowing what a human being he is.
And with his injuries, it's... They gave up on
the wrong guy. I agree. Definitely gave up on
the wrong guy. Yeah, they let him go and hired
Deshaun. That was probably one of the stupidest
moves ever made in all of football, ever. It's
got to rank up there. Yeah. Well, we got anything
else, or are we going to go to the creeps? I
had some more stuff about teams and who's going
to be the key players. I can go through it a
little more quickly than I did last time. Are
you going back from before? Yeah, I had a misstep
there, so a little bit of time has disappeared
from the continuum. Well, what happened is Miss
Golfenstein came over and kicked me. And she
started waving that weird thing over your head.
Yeah, I don't know what was that. I don't know,
it smelled funky. It looked like one of those
old cans of Comet. Remember Comet? Yeah, with
a little shaker top. Yeah, yeah. It looked like
one of those, like from the 60s. Oh, God. Go
tell me what was in there. I don't know. I mean,
was she doing another spell? I mean, she already
made Rob a capuchin monkey. Yeah. I don't know
what else she's going to do. What would she turn
you into? Maybe a fruit bat. There we go. That'd
be great. A fruit bat, yeah. Nothing too big.
Oh, I'd go and take aim on everybody. So, all
right. All right, we have... Excuse me. Expected
key players. We left off last time with the Jets
running back Breeze Hall. Looks like he's doing
pretty well. For the Baltimore Ravens, linebacker
Trent Simpson, who's supposed to expect to have
a breakout season. Okay. For the Bengals, their
corner, Cam Taylor Britt. Uh -huh. And I think
they need some success at corner, definitely.
Yeah, definitely. Cleveland Browns edge rusher
Alex Wright is who they're looking to step up
and have a big season. It would be funny if he
and Miles Garrett could team up and be like Neil
Smith and Derek Thomas. That's who I was trying
to come up with. That would be great. I'd be
all about that. I think that would be excellent.
That would really help them in the division too.
Also, for Pittsburgh Steelers, offensive tackle
Broderick Jones. I think that's working out really
well so far because Aaron Rodgers is having plenty
of time to throw. For the AFC South, Houston
Texans running back Nick Chubb. Okay. I can see
him definitely having a breakout here. Well,
they kind of need to to make C .J. Stroud have
a little bit more comfort in what he's doing.
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I don't know who the receivers
are, though Diggs isn't there anymore. I don't
know. Yeah. Well, anyhow. We'll see what happens.
Yeah. Excuse me. Indianapolis Colts center Tanner
Bartolini. Okay. New center, but he can solidify
that line. So far, their first game, they did
pretty dang well. Yeah. Stepping on, okay, Jacksonville
Jaguars. Offensive tackle, Anton Harrison. It's
interesting, they're picking a lot of linemen
to step up and have big seasons. That is interesting.
Yeah. Now, they list him as O -tackle, but they're
not saying whether he's left or right. So, somebody
who's more familiar with Jags. Okay. Tennessee
Titans. They're expecting Legereus Sneed to step
up and be the big person on the team this year.
Well, that was the thing is they said that injury
really affected him. Apparently so. He looked
okay. He looked okay. But he wasn't really dominating.
Not like he was over here. Yeah. He was really
taking a big step. And I can't figure out whether
it's his injury or if it's a coaching. Yeah,
it's a new system. You can't do what he did here.
different system yeah well also he don't he doesn't
have as many players yeah over there to do what
he did over here he doesn't have the guys on
the other side you know whether it be Reid or
whoever whoever was covering the other side he
didn't have them you know McDuffie uh so he's
kind of a little bit more on his own out there
which means that they're free to double team
him more or whatever you know yeah yeah But he's
pretty much who I watch when I'm watching the
Titans. Yeah, me too. I really don't have him.
He's still number 38. Oh, and Cam Ward. I watch
Cam Ward too. Because so far it didn't look to
me like he had much. Yeah. But we'll see. But
for a rookie, it's all right. And, I mean, you
know, their defense, anyhow, go ahead. All right,
switching over to the NFC for the Cardinals,
edge rusher Josh Sweat. That's who they picked
up from the Eagles. Yes. So stepping into the
team and being their breakout player means they
didn't have a whole lot better than him to start.
No, and Sweat is fine. He's good, but I don't
see him making that big of a difference on that
roster. Yeah, yeah. He's going to help, sure,
but. Yeah, so it might be the kind of thing that
they had to pick somebody. I think so. It's not
like he's going to be competing for league MVP.
He's just going to be the best player. He's going
to be, yeah. And they could get him. Yeah. For
the Rams, they're picking wide receiver Devontae
Adams. Wow, still? Okay. And, you know, if he
could be their breakout player, that's going
to go a long way in helping the Rams put together
some wins. As we were talking earlier, they're
looking kind of mediocre. I mean, not like they're...
bad mediocre, but there's nothing interesting
or exciting about him. Kind of vanilla. No fun
identity. Stafford, he can still throw, but he's
not quite that gunslinger that he used to be
either. True. But if you have someone like Devontae
Adams, you use him for the big plays anyhow,
so we'll see what happens. They've got to develop
that chemistry first. For the Niners, they settled
on wide receiver Ricky Pearsall. which is kind
of bittersweet because pretty much they picked
him because all the other receivers got injured.
Yes. So he's the guy that they're kind of leaning
on. He wasn't going to be the starter. No, he
was not, but they had no choice right now. He
is now. And then isn't Kittle out too now? I
think Kittle's out for a couple of games at least.
I don't know if I heard that one. They even got
their wide receiver, I thought. Anyhow, go ahead.
I'm not for sure on that one. For the Seahawks,
running back Kenneth Walker III. I remember him
in the preseason having some great success plowing
through and running well. It's interesting. Seahawks,
you don't really think of them as a run -heavy
team, but they've had some awesome running backs
in the past. Remember Curtis Martin? Marshawn
Lynch. Marshawn Lynch, Curtis Martin. Curtis
Martin. Then there's another one in between them.
Yeah. Oh, well, anyhow, there's another really
good running back in there, too. Can't think
of his name right now. Okay, NFC East, Dallas
Cowboys. They need their breakout player to be
wide receiver George Pickens. They picked him
up from Pittsburgh? Pittsburgh. Somewhere in
the AFC. Especially if C .D. Lamb is going to
have trouble catching the ball. But either way,
they're going to need Pickens to be the guy who
takes the heat off of C .D. Lamb. I'm pretty
sure it was the Steelers had Pickens and Pickett
last year. I think you're right. Yeah, Pickens
and Pickett. Yeah, Pickett was a quarterback,
and Pickett was the receiver. Okay, for the Giants,
cornerback Paulson Adebo? Yeah, Adebo. Babelsnatch?
Babelsnatch. All right, so they're picking a
corner. Okay. Giants could definitely use...
A breakout play in the pass defense. That would
definitely help them. Yeah, that would help them
definitely. They definitely struggled last season.
For the Eagles, D -tackle Moro Ojomo. Now, I
don't remember hearing his name called in the
game against the Cowboys. No, I don't remember
hearing his name at all in there. Yeah. And this
is a guy that they think they could coach up
to. And what is he now? He's a D -tackle. A D
-tackle. Because, you know, they lost Josh Sweat
and Brandon Graham. Yeah. I don't know. I mean,
I didn't hear his name at all or recall seeing
him, but, I mean, I don't know. Yeah. Supposedly
last season was his best season. Okay. But he's
decent at the pass rush. I guess he's been overshadowed
up to this point, so it's like we need you to
step up and be the guy. Now that Sweat and what's
-his -name's left two other teams. Randy Graham,
yeah. Yeah, Randy Graham. But so far in the first
game, I don't remember hearing his name. I don't
remember hearing or seeing him at all, really.
So, first name. Yeah. For the Commanders, wide
receiver Debo Samuel. Is there... Breakout player
that they think is good. Commanders. Oh, yeah,
that's right. Samuel went there. Yeah. He's got
to develop. If he can develop a pretty good rapport
with Jaden Daniels, they may have something.
Yeah. I imagine him being the consistent deep
target for Jaden Daniels to throw to to try to
slow down the pass rush or the blitzing. Yeah,
I would love to see. Yeah. Well, I mean, I think
that's very possible. We'll see. For the Bears,
O -tackle Braxton Jones, another offensive lineman,
to protect Caleb Williams, keep him upright so
he has time to throw. He did okay last night.
Yeah, yeah, he did. He did okay. I've definitely
seen a lot worse performances. He looks like
he's progressing. Yeah, definitely so. For the
Lions, cornerback Terian Arnold. Their pass defense
wasn't good enough last year. So they're looking
for this guy to step up and kind of set the tone.
They're going to kind of need it from what I
saw. Yeah. Supposedly he's got the skill and
the tools to do it if he's got the heart to step
up and kind of shoulder that burden. Yeah. For
the Packers, edge rush Rashawn Gary. Definitely
a pass rush is going to help the Packers be a
dominant in their division because they're rushing.
Caleb Williams in Chicago twice a year. And then
what's -his -name in Detroit twice a year. Yeah.
And the new guy in Minnesota, McCarthy, twice
a year. Having a really dominant pass rush is
definitely going to help them. Yeah, and especially
with someone like Jared Goff, who can't handle
the rush. He does stupid things. And that's kind
of the running theme. Caleb Williams you can
rattle with a rush. McCarthy's. You would expect
to be able to rattle over the rush being a rookie,
but maybe not. He kind of surprised me last night.
He went from very shaky to getting it done. Yeah.
But on the other hand, this was written before
they traded for Micah Parsons. Oh, yeah, that's
okay. So Micah Parsons might be substitute for
Rashawn Gary. Okay. Minnesota Vikings safety
Theo Jackson is who they're expecting to be the
breakout player. I would revise that and say
McCarthy. I think you're right. Yeah. I would
too. It's tough to go all in on somebody after
one game, but he looked good. He looked really
good. Yeah. And this was after a pick six, wasn't
it? Yeah. Yeah, he came back and, you know, instead
of falling apart, he's like, I'm not going to
let that happen again. Yeah. And that's the way
you want them. Yeah. For the Falcons, it's their
D tackle. This is a real babble snatch name.
Ruque or Horhoro. Babel snatch. Yes. Yeah. So
a D tackle. All right. I think babel snatch is
going to do well. Yeah. Yeah. But good for the
pass rush, good for the run stopping. They want
him to be their breakout player this year. They
need him to be, so okay. Carolina Panthers, edge
rusher DJ Wanham. I remember him last year. A
little bit, yeah. I remember hearing that name
a bit, so. They're expecting him to build on
last year and do better this time. Okay. New
Orleans Saints guard Trevor Penning. Interesting
they singled out a guard. An interior lineman
generally means... Why a guard? That generally
means you want to run up the middle and you're
trying to slow the pass rush up the middle. Yeah,
I don't know how... Okay. Or if you're going
to pull the guard and run to the outside, you
can have a fast, agile pulling guard get his
ass out there and block. That's the guy they
think has the most potential. I don't know. Wow,
that is weird. Well, their choices. Yeah. And
then last but not least, Tampa Bay Buccaneers
linebacker Servosia Dennis. Babelsnatch Dennis.
Babelsnatch Dennis. Okay. They didn't pick Mayfield.
No, and I'll tell you why. It's because he had
a solid season last year. That's true. He doesn't
really need to be a breakout. He already has
broken out. He's in the top 15 quarterbacks,
and I think they're pretty happy with that. Yeah.
He may even be in the top 10. I would definitely
expect lots of good things from Baker Mayfield
this year. I do too. It seems pretty clear that
each season he's there, he's getting more comfortable,
more happy, more confident. Things are working.
And even when they didn't have such a great season
last year. No, he's still a, yeah. It's like
Cincinnati's been playing up and down, but Joe
Burrow's been consistently good. I think Baker
Mayfield's kind of the same way. I think so,
too. He's settled in. He's like, yeah, we'll
ride it up and we'll ride it down, but we'll
get it going. Yeah, I'm going to go in and I'm
going to play my best game and see how it goes.
Yeah. Yeah, I like the new, mature Baker Mayfield
in zone. Compare that to one of the other Florida
teams in Miami and their quarterback situation.
Oh, yeah. I have every sympathy for Tua from
all the damage that's been done to his brain
and how tough he is and hanging in there. And
he's got the biggest heart in the world because
he still wants to do it. He still wants to try.
Yeah. But I just don't know. It's just not happening.
I'm telling you, yeah. Yeah. I agree, but the
problem is they don't have an answer down there.
Yeah, part of the problem is the fans want them,
or enough of them still want them, and the other
problem is, yeah, who else are you going to bring
in? They've got nobody. Yeah. They didn't draft
for anybody, which surprised me. Yeah, normally
you have at least somebody who's young and decent
enough. There's nothing else to run your practice
squad. And I've got an idea for them, too. Oh,
yeah? Reunite them, the Alabama alumni, two starters.
and trade Tua to Philadelphia. And then when
Jalen Hurt gets hurt, he can go in there. It
would be obviously what happened in Alabama.
Yeah. Where Tua got hurt and Hurt comes in there.
That would be poetic. Yeah, yeah, it would. Like,
I got this, Jalen. Go sit down. Go sit down.
Who would be a good quarterback to step in at
the Dolphins? Somebody who's either not playing
or is a backup somewhere. They trade for Minshew.
Yeah, that could work. Hey, Tyree Kill for Gardner
Minshew? Yeah. Think it'll happen? I'll do that.
No. No, I don't think it will either. No. Now
they're going to prove us wrong because they're
listening and they're going to say, ah, we're
going to kill those dudes. We're not going to
do it even though we were going to do it today,
but now, no. We'll show those sporting bastards.
Yes. All right. You got anything else? I think
we're good. We're up to about an hour and 45.
That's not bad. That's respectable. I certainly
respect it. I do too. Anyhow, thank you all for
listening. We really appreciate it. I hope you
have a great day and go fuck yourself.