WEBVTT

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Hey, you fucking derelicts. It's time for the

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Daily Douchebag Pledge. I, Joe or Jane Listener,

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hereby promise to download the show. I, Joe or

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Jane Listener. Hereby promise to grab other people's

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phones, unattended computers, public computers,

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and all of my work computers as well, and download

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the show from there. I, Joe or Jane Listener,

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hereby promise to make other people listen. I,

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Joe or Jane Listener, will hereby lie to everyone

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about how quality the show is. I, Joe or Jane

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Listener. promise to make all my family members

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listen and recite the daily douchebag pledge.

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And finally, I, Joe or Jane Listener, hereby

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promise to make the trek to Knobloch, Missouri,

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just to have a selfie with the Knobloch sign.

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Here at Two Douchebags and a Microphone, we don't

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stand behind our journalistic integrity. Go ahead

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and assume we got the story wrong. At least we

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admit it. Not like all those other guys. We can

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and will lie if it makes the story better. Yes,

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it's true. Mark is an old bastard. It's also

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true that Mark uses a lot of ibuprofen. But Mark

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would like to tell you... If you see any pictures

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of him roofing ibuprofen, it's obviously fake,

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and you're to take the pictures and tear them

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up immediately. Your mom is so scatterbrained,

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it took her two hours to watch 60 Minutes. Remember

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to send all male body part photos to Rob Rad's

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inbox. This is a voice guide from your favorite

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podcast, Two Douchebags and a Microphone. People

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often ask us how they can find us when doing

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a remote broadcast. One, smell. Go to the city

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market and start sniffing. Our aroma has been

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described as a mixture of flea powder for goats,

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Tabasco sauce, and old sock with dark fuzzy urine.

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Two, look for the spot absent of patrons. Three,

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the most telling sign is a crowd of patrons vomiting

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uncontrollably. Four, just call 316 - Wild asparagus

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is plentiful and easy to find. It can be stewed

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with garlic and onion which is both wild which

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can be easily found in a very tasty post -apocalypse

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food. You can make this into a delicious stew

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and this will hold you over at least for a couple

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of days until you can find some other food. This

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is Chicago. I am the most dangerous city in North

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America. You can't touch me. Oh yeah? This is

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Kansas City here. Hold my beer, bitch. Two douchebags

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and a microphone. And we are back. From my little

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excursion on the ocean and three beautiful islands,

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my name is Mark, and this here program is Two

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Douchebags and a Microphone. Like I mentioned

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before, I am the Kansas City arm of this show.

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And I am Rob from the beautiful Niagara Arm of

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Lake of the Ozarks. Thank you, Rob. So, first

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off, Rob, how you been? Everything going good?

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Oh, I've been busy, man. I've been staying busy

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as hell. We're working overtime now. Yeah. Overtime

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and a girlfriend keeps you busy. And now and

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then you have kids on top of that. Yeah. Oh,

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yeah, yeah. No, we got home late. Sunday night.

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The flight was postponed, but it was okay. It

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was only postponed 45 minutes. People miss their

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cruise Sunday. Not the one we were on, but the

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one that was taken off. We booked a room on South

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Beach right next, it's right on South Beach where

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we booked it. And we're going to go out and,

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you know, go to the beach and hang out in the

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ocean and all this stuff. So we get there, we're

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there for a couple hours. and these really dark

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storm clouds come out of nowhere. And then everything

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turned severe. We had 60 -mile -an -hour winds,

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quarter -size hail, and none of the planes could

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land that had these people in that were getting

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ready to get on a cruise boat. So did you see

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the video I posted of the two cruise ships going

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into the storm? Did you see that? No, I did not

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see that one. Well, go to my page. Go to my Facebook

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account. Oh, no, no, wait. Okay, that was a vicious

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storm. That was the one with 60 mile an hour

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winds. You see, they're on a time limit. They

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have to go all the way to almost Venezuela. And

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that's where the ABC Islands are at, Aruba, Curacao,

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and Bonaire, where we went. They're way down

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there, so the ships have to leave. If the weather's

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bad... People are going to be in there puking

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and feeling horrible for a little while. But

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that's the way it is. They're on a time limit.

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If they're just going to the Western Caribbean

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like Cozumel or something, they could go around

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it. But this particular cruise, you don't have

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a whole lot of options. So they were waiting

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for the people. And we're in the airport. And

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all of the planes that were going to land in

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Miami had to circle around. until this storm

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cleared up. And the storm came out of nowhere.

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They didn't think it was going to turn severe.

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They thought it was going to be a couple bolts

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of lightning. And, you know, and that was really

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about it. Small hail, maybe. And it just exploded

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over Miami. So all these planes were circling

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around and all these people were in it. So we're

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at the airport and they see, you know, we're

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still wearing some crew stuff, me and Balor.

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And a guy comes up and he goes, oh, oh, hey,

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are you getting ready to go on the boat? And

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I'm like, no, we were last week's. And he goes,

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oh, man, he goes, we just landed. And we're getting

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ready to go on the horizon. And he goes, and

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I go, dude, I go, I got some bad news for you,

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man. I showed him the video. I go, that's the

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horizon. And that's the Mardi Gras. And that

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was about four hours ago. They were leaving port.

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What? Yes. Oh, shit. I said, if I were you, I'd

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get on the phone to Carnival and come up with

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a backup plan. He goes, fuck. He goes, man, he

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goes, I'm supposed to be here for nine days.

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My tickets are nine days later and I don't have

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a place to stay in Miami. Me or my family and

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his children are over there. I didn't say it

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in front of them about the cruise being canceled.

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I, you know, I let him break it to him, but they

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got their flippers on and stuff. And I'm like,

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oh, fuck. So. Yeah, I felt horrible. I felt horrible

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telling him. But the reason I told him right

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then was, number one, he doesn't waste his time

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going to the port. And number two, he can get

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on the phone to Carnival and maybe get something

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figured out. They have four -day cruises there.

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Maybe he could hop on one of them. Maybe they

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could accommodate him somehow else. I told him,

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I said, look, I said, and he had the insurance.

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So he was going to get his money back, but the

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fact is he's down there with his children and

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his wife, and he wanted to have a vacation. And

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I was like, you know, get on the phone to him.

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See what you can manage. See what you can finagle.

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So anyhow, he was going to do that, and I said,

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at the very least, you're going to get your money

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back. Use the money that you're going to get

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back and book a room on the ocean, and you and

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your family relax and have a good time. He was

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very appreciative. He goes, man, he goes, thank

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you. And he shook my hand. I told him, I said,

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I've been through many of these. I like to take

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vacations. I've been through many of my plans

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getting screwed up. And there's virtually a way

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around everything if you're clever enough. So

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anyhow, I'm going to go ahead and start with

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a little bit of what happened, if you don't care.

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Is that cool? I figured you would. Okay. Go ahead.

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Okay, well, first off, I'm going to go into the

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sun poisoning that I referred to when you posted

00:09:06.940 --> 00:09:11.940
about a seagull didn't grab me up. But I got

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news for you. A seagull almost did. I was in

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the ocean. I thought about that all day. That'd

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be perfect. Oh, the seagull was grabbing fish

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all around me at Kokomo Beach in Curacao. And

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this seagull's like... Right next to me, I'm

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like, fuck, man, those things are good. But we

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found out through a, oh, I'm not sure what her

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title was, oceanographer or something like that.

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She said that seagulls, they go blind and they

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starve to death. And the, or not seagulls, but

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pelicans. I've been saying seagulls. The seagull

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was the one dive bombing next to me. Pelicans

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go blind when they. They hit the water so hard

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to get the fish, it blinds them eventually when

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they get a little bit older, and they starve

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to death. But this is a pelican, not a seagull.

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A seagull is like a rat with wings. They're everywhere.

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And you've got to watch them. They'll shed all

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over you, too. So, anyhow, there's a seagull

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pecking on shit all around me. I'm like, you

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little bastard. So, anyhow, but the pelican,

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he did the same thing. He is a little bit further

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away from me. He was fun to watch. Because you'd

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see him, man, he'd be looking all around on the

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water. He'd see something down there, poof, he'd

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be in it. I mean, and it was graceful and fast.

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Okay, so I'm out in the hot tub with seven other

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gentlemen, okay, and we're all talking football.

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And you know how that goes, right? It feeds off

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itself. No, I don't. No, I do not. I do not get

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in the hot tub with seven other gentlemen. It's

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a cruise ship. There were some women in it, too,

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but they all left because they got pissed off,

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I think, because we kept talking football. So

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we're in there. That's a good chance. Okay, we're

00:11:08.179 --> 00:11:12.139
throwing some cash at the bartender guy serving

00:11:12.139 --> 00:11:15.480
us in the hot tub. So he's not supposed to do

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this. They're supposed to give you one drink

00:11:17.299 --> 00:11:19.659
at a time, but I'm, like, giving him some money,

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and I go, three red stripes and... A mystery,

00:11:23.659 --> 00:11:27.720
some sort of mystery liquor. Okay. He comes back,

00:11:27.779 --> 00:11:31.220
three red stripes, mystery liquor. So the other

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guys started looking at me going, man, even though

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I don't like your team, because your team keeps

00:11:36.440 --> 00:11:39.139
kicking my ass. One guy was a Ravens fan. Another

00:11:39.139 --> 00:11:41.700
guy was a Bills fan. And they both said, they

00:11:41.700 --> 00:11:43.809
agreed. They said. We may not like your team,

00:11:43.870 --> 00:11:46.409
but you're pretty cool. Because I told him, I

00:11:46.409 --> 00:11:48.690
said, you throw this guy a five when you first

00:11:48.690 --> 00:11:51.389
get here and he will do anything. He'll walk

00:11:51.389 --> 00:11:54.309
through a fucking wall for you. So I go, watch

00:11:54.309 --> 00:11:56.769
this. So I give him seven bucks and I go, hey,

00:11:56.870 --> 00:11:58.809
I said, next time you come back, you're going

00:11:58.809 --> 00:12:00.889
to have three red stripes and a mystery liquor

00:12:00.889 --> 00:12:04.490
for me, right? You betcha. And every time he

00:12:04.490 --> 00:12:07.669
did. So we're out there just getting fucking

00:12:07.669 --> 00:12:12.120
mangled and slowly, but surely. Everybody around

00:12:12.120 --> 00:12:14.379
me starts getting picked off. They're like, oh,

00:12:14.480 --> 00:12:17.559
man, fuck, I got to go have dinner. Oh, shit,

00:12:17.620 --> 00:12:20.080
man, I have to meet the wife somewhere. Oh, man,

00:12:20.179 --> 00:12:22.039
my family's on this cruise. I got to get back

00:12:22.039 --> 00:12:25.100
with them. So I'm the only one left. And then

00:12:25.100 --> 00:12:28.759
as soon as the last guy left, I have three red

00:12:28.759 --> 00:12:31.559
stripes show up and some sort of mystery bourbon.

00:12:32.059 --> 00:12:38.039
I'm like, I'm like, well, I really shouldn't

00:12:38.039 --> 00:12:42.649
do this. Nah, I'm not a pussy. I fucking slammed

00:12:42.649 --> 00:12:45.970
all that, right? The next thing I know, I'm waking

00:12:45.970 --> 00:12:49.669
up three hours later in the hot tub. I don't

00:12:49.669 --> 00:12:52.769
burn. I may have burned once in my life and I

00:12:52.769 --> 00:12:55.309
was brown the next day. You know, lucky me, you

00:12:55.309 --> 00:12:57.750
know, I'm Mediterranean, so what this means is...

00:12:57.750 --> 00:13:02.970
Yeah, yeah, during the summer, I am seasonal

00:13:02.970 --> 00:13:05.570
other. I've always claimed this. Yeah, during

00:13:05.570 --> 00:13:08.470
the summer, I get really dark. During the winter...

00:13:08.649 --> 00:13:10.909
I can get really light and that's what, you know,

00:13:10.929 --> 00:13:16.710
Mediterranean's do. So, um, so anyhow, uh, um,

00:13:16.889 --> 00:13:19.870
I was really disappointed in my skin pigment.

00:13:20.570 --> 00:13:23.750
I was like, fuck, I was lobster, man. I was beet

00:13:23.750 --> 00:13:27.169
red and I was hurting. I'm like, oh shit, man.

00:13:27.549 --> 00:13:30.070
And you know, I get out of there and I'm just

00:13:30.070 --> 00:13:32.740
like. kind of disoriented. I'm like, man, what'd

00:13:32.740 --> 00:13:34.779
I do? I looked at the clock. I've been asleep

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for like fucking three hours in the hot tub.

00:13:36.879 --> 00:13:39.940
I had my shades on so no one could tell I was

00:13:39.940 --> 00:13:44.580
passed out. So, um, I get, I go down to my room

00:13:44.580 --> 00:13:49.600
and Val's like, Oh wow, dude, you are red, red.

00:13:49.679 --> 00:13:51.679
You look like a fire truck. I'm like, yeah, no

00:13:51.679 --> 00:13:55.669
shit. I feel like I'm on fire. So Then I start

00:13:55.669 --> 00:13:57.870
to sit down and the room starts spinning. And

00:13:57.870 --> 00:13:59.889
not because I'm drunk, because I just woke up,

00:13:59.889 --> 00:14:02.590
right? I wasn't drunk. The room starts spinning

00:14:02.590 --> 00:14:05.409
and I start vomiting like fucking furiously,

00:14:05.549 --> 00:14:08.590
like violently. And I do this for about three

00:14:08.590 --> 00:14:11.169
to four hours. And I didn't even know it was

00:14:11.169 --> 00:14:12.929
sun poisoning at the time. And it could have

00:14:12.929 --> 00:14:16.250
been a little dehydration too. So I'm just like

00:14:16.250 --> 00:14:20.379
fucking, oh, I felt like dying. I was like, if

00:14:20.379 --> 00:14:22.059
someone gave me a gun at that point, I would

00:14:22.059 --> 00:14:24.100
have considered pulling the trigger. I felt that

00:14:24.100 --> 00:14:28.139
bad. But this is one thing about a cruise ship.

00:14:28.360 --> 00:14:31.500
People that cruise a lot know. People that don't,

00:14:31.500 --> 00:14:34.940
don't know this. If you feel bad on a cruise

00:14:34.940 --> 00:14:37.559
ship, the worst thing you can do is go to the

00:14:37.559 --> 00:14:39.860
hospital on a cruise ship. They keep you there.

00:14:40.700 --> 00:14:43.820
I went in there. I found this out because a friend

00:14:43.820 --> 00:14:45.700
of mine, Jeff, he went down there because he

00:14:45.700 --> 00:14:47.970
had a headache, right? and he thought he was

00:14:47.970 --> 00:14:50.210
going to get some fucking Excedrin or something,

00:14:50.370 --> 00:14:52.629
right? They kept him in there for three days

00:14:52.629 --> 00:14:56.309
because they don't know if you have the norovirus

00:14:56.309 --> 00:14:59.490
or something like that. They go ahead and go

00:14:59.490 --> 00:15:01.750
with worst -case scenario because they don't

00:15:01.750 --> 00:15:05.450
want the whole ship getting sick. I didn't see

00:15:05.450 --> 00:15:08.129
that. Yeah, you say, oh. He didn't waste half

00:15:08.129 --> 00:15:11.690
his trip. Yeah, he did. He disappeared, and I

00:15:11.690 --> 00:15:14.509
talked to his wife, Susan. I'm like, what the

00:15:14.509 --> 00:15:17.889
fuck happened to Jeff? He went down to the fucking

00:15:17.889 --> 00:15:20.370
hospital to get some Excedrin and he's been gone

00:15:20.370 --> 00:15:23.330
ever since. So then we find out he comes back

00:15:23.330 --> 00:15:26.129
three days later. What the hell happened? Oh,

00:15:26.230 --> 00:15:29.789
they keep you in there. I told them it is from

00:15:29.789 --> 00:15:31.830
the sun. I had a headache from the sun and they

00:15:31.830 --> 00:15:34.929
told me, no, it could be this virus or this virus.

00:15:35.090 --> 00:15:38.529
And then they lock you up. They lock you in there.

00:15:38.649 --> 00:15:42.169
And they did not even let him contact his wife?

00:15:42.990 --> 00:15:47.779
No. He didn't have a way because back then, they

00:15:47.779 --> 00:15:51.340
were supposed to get a hold of her and they didn't.

00:15:51.919 --> 00:15:54.980
And the reason is, is this right here. Back then,

00:15:55.019 --> 00:15:58.259
they didn't have the app or the internet. This

00:15:58.259 --> 00:16:01.879
is quite a while ago. Oh, okay, okay. Now, I

00:16:01.879 --> 00:16:03.779
just get on there and go, Val, the fucking hospital

00:16:03.779 --> 00:16:06.700
got me. I'm trying to get out, explain later,

00:16:06.840 --> 00:16:08.340
you know, or something. And it'd be like, oh,

00:16:08.360 --> 00:16:12.740
shit. Okay. So, no, there was nothing he could

00:16:12.740 --> 00:16:15.440
do. And finally, I think Susan found out the

00:16:15.440 --> 00:16:16.899
next day. I can't remember. It was quite a while

00:16:16.899 --> 00:16:19.120
ago. I think she found out the next day. I think

00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:20.679
she called around and said, hey, my husband's

00:16:20.679 --> 00:16:23.279
missing. And I think that's when they figured

00:16:23.279 --> 00:16:26.039
it out. Oh, yeah, yeah. Hang on. We'll get right

00:16:26.039 --> 00:16:28.700
back. Oh, yeah, yeah. He's in the hospital. So

00:16:28.700 --> 00:16:30.539
Jeff had to sit there for three fucking days

00:16:30.539 --> 00:16:33.840
in a cot doing nothing, missing his cruise because

00:16:33.840 --> 00:16:37.059
he had a headache. So the worst thing I could

00:16:37.059 --> 00:16:39.799
do was go to the hospital because I'd be in there

00:16:39.799 --> 00:16:42.769
the rest of the cruise. So I'm like. No, no,

00:16:42.769 --> 00:16:45.190
no. I'm staying here. I'm staying here. You know,

00:16:45.230 --> 00:16:46.970
I could have got something to maybe feel better.

00:16:47.529 --> 00:16:50.149
I'm even contemplating calling my doctor in Kansas

00:16:50.149 --> 00:16:52.730
City. I was going to call her and say, hey, send

00:16:52.730 --> 00:16:57.149
me some Tamiflu. Well, Val reminded me that it

00:16:57.149 --> 00:16:59.649
probably would do no good because of my symptoms.

00:16:59.889 --> 00:17:02.570
And then I got to looking it up. And Tamiflu,

00:17:02.690 --> 00:17:04.630
evidently, it'll get rid of flu, but it'll also

00:17:04.630 --> 00:17:06.490
give you nausea, which I didn't need. I already

00:17:06.490 --> 00:17:12.680
had. So the next morning is Aruba. And so I'm

00:17:12.680 --> 00:17:15.119
just like, I'm just drained. You know how you

00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:18.000
feel the flu makes you feel puny and you can't

00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:23.359
really move? Yeah. Well, this is what I felt.

00:17:23.839 --> 00:17:28.319
So I drink a couple of the kind of like infamil

00:17:28.319 --> 00:17:32.819
stuff, the high vitamin concentrates and all

00:17:32.819 --> 00:17:36.500
that. Drink a couple of those deals. I forgot

00:17:36.500 --> 00:17:39.539
exactly the name of it. It's not the Milky Base

00:17:39.539 --> 00:17:41.420
because that would have been horrible. It's the

00:17:41.420 --> 00:17:43.960
kind that you mix with water. I drank a couple

00:17:43.960 --> 00:17:47.539
of them and I felt just good enough to go out

00:17:47.539 --> 00:17:50.099
onto the port. Our excursion wasn't until 4 .30.

00:17:50.279 --> 00:17:55.759
It was a sunset cruise in Aruba. Okay, so I'm

00:17:55.759 --> 00:17:58.299
like, all right, let's give a test run. So I

00:17:58.299 --> 00:18:01.579
go out there. And I'm still feeling bad, but

00:18:01.579 --> 00:18:04.240
not nearly, you know, enough to walk around.

00:18:04.359 --> 00:18:06.380
And we catch a cab. And we're like, hey, take

00:18:06.380 --> 00:18:09.200
us to a place where we can go snorkeling and

00:18:09.200 --> 00:18:12.799
hanging out on the beach. So I go in the ocean.

00:18:12.839 --> 00:18:14.940
I'm just sitting there, sitting there, you know.

00:18:15.619 --> 00:18:17.359
Then I'm like, you know what, I'm going to try

00:18:17.359 --> 00:18:19.940
a beer. Had a couple of beers. And then, like,

00:18:20.019 --> 00:18:23.299
four hours later, I realized I wasn't sick anymore.

00:18:23.440 --> 00:18:27.660
I felt great. So then we talked to Cindy. And,

00:18:27.740 --> 00:18:31.119
you know. Topher's wife. She's like, you ever

00:18:31.119 --> 00:18:36.099
think about it being sun poisoning? Uh, no. Sure

00:18:36.099 --> 00:18:41.259
sounds like it. Oh, that would make sense. And

00:18:41.259 --> 00:18:43.359
told her the story. Yeah, you probably had sun

00:18:43.359 --> 00:18:46.960
poisoning. Okay. All right. Thank you. Had sun

00:18:46.960 --> 00:18:49.799
poisoning. So I thought I ruined the whole cruise.

00:18:49.900 --> 00:18:53.630
I did. That night when I was so sickly and everything,

00:18:53.829 --> 00:18:56.170
I was like, I fucked this whole cruise up. I'm

00:18:56.170 --> 00:18:58.690
not going to be able to do anything. I feel so

00:18:58.690 --> 00:19:00.769
bad. I'm going to sit here in this fucking room.

00:19:00.970 --> 00:19:03.390
The most I can do is go to the balcony and kind

00:19:03.390 --> 00:19:07.809
of lay there feeling bad. But no, I got better.

00:19:08.639 --> 00:19:11.000
Evidently, sun poisoning goes away pretty good

00:19:11.000 --> 00:19:13.480
if you take care of yourself. So that's what

00:19:13.480 --> 00:19:16.119
I was referring to on the douchebag page when

00:19:16.119 --> 00:19:19.440
you said I got fucking stolen by a seagull or

00:19:19.440 --> 00:19:24.000
whatever, right? No, I said thankfully you weren't

00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:26.900
stolen by a seagull. Yeah, that was it. That

00:19:26.900 --> 00:19:30.420
was it, yeah. So no. No, and I said no, but I

00:19:30.420 --> 00:19:33.339
did get sun poisoning, so there's that. So anyhow,

00:19:33.519 --> 00:19:36.539
KCI when we got there is really cool. Everybody

00:19:36.539 --> 00:19:41.569
there was... Neat, nice, and TSA, going through

00:19:41.569 --> 00:19:45.470
the line, there's only two people there. It took

00:19:45.470 --> 00:19:48.910
us like two minutes to get through TSA. So we

00:19:48.910 --> 00:19:52.930
landed at Florida International, and we were

00:19:52.930 --> 00:19:55.089
on the third row of the plane. We were way up

00:19:55.089 --> 00:19:58.250
there. So we got out of there, and our baggage

00:19:58.250 --> 00:20:00.430
was the first off of the conveyor, so you knew

00:20:00.430 --> 00:20:02.690
something was going to go wrong like sun poisoning,

00:20:02.849 --> 00:20:05.539
right? Our bags were the first two coming off

00:20:05.539 --> 00:20:07.980
the conveyor. We're the third row. So we got

00:20:07.980 --> 00:20:11.039
our bags. I walk outside. I hit the lift map.

00:20:11.299 --> 00:20:13.599
And this guy slams on his brakes right in front

00:20:13.599 --> 00:20:16.720
of me. He goes, hey, I'm Tobin. I'm like, you're

00:20:16.720 --> 00:20:18.740
my ride? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll take you

00:20:18.740 --> 00:20:22.480
down to, oh, shit. I forgot the name of the,

00:20:22.660 --> 00:20:26.200
anyhow, whatever hotel. Oh, it's the Holiday

00:20:26.200 --> 00:20:28.660
Inn. I'm taking you down to the Holiday Inn at

00:20:28.660 --> 00:20:31.039
the Bayside Marketplace. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So

00:20:31.039 --> 00:20:35.380
we get in. From the time, it's like 50 minutes

00:20:35.380 --> 00:20:38.079
to an hour in the traffic that they had from

00:20:38.079 --> 00:20:41.380
Fort Lauderdale Airport to where we were going.

00:20:42.000 --> 00:20:45.440
So after the plane ride, we got there at about

00:20:45.440 --> 00:20:49.619
5 .30 their time. And we were actually in our

00:20:49.619 --> 00:20:53.940
hotel room at 6 .30. That's unheard of. That's

00:20:53.940 --> 00:20:56.920
unheard of. Yeah. So all that went great. And

00:20:56.920 --> 00:21:01.309
then we had no idea. But we booked a place because

00:21:01.309 --> 00:21:04.349
it was really close to the port, okay? We were

00:21:04.349 --> 00:21:06.609
like, you know what? It's a half mile from the

00:21:06.609 --> 00:21:10.809
port. It's the closest hotel to the port. That's

00:21:10.809 --> 00:21:12.869
why we booked it there. We just wanted to go

00:21:12.869 --> 00:21:15.269
out, get an Uber, and be there in two minutes,

00:21:15.390 --> 00:21:17.990
which happened. But we had no idea that it was

00:21:17.990 --> 00:21:20.549
right next to the Bayside Marketplace, which

00:21:20.549 --> 00:21:23.529
is a very cool section of Miami on the oceanfront.

00:21:24.479 --> 00:21:27.220
And it has like a huge Ferris wheel that kind

00:21:27.220 --> 00:21:29.660
of goes over the ocean. It has live entertainment.

00:21:29.859 --> 00:21:32.519
They had Spanish dancing. They have all these

00:21:32.519 --> 00:21:35.859
bars, restaurants. I mean, it's just a beautiful

00:21:35.859 --> 00:21:40.200
place. So we went over there and had some really,

00:21:40.279 --> 00:21:45.279
really, really good mojitos. And then I had a

00:21:45.279 --> 00:21:49.530
lot more. I had a lot more on the cruise. We

00:21:49.530 --> 00:21:51.529
decided we opted out of the Ferris wheel. We

00:21:51.529 --> 00:21:53.470
had a couple of mojitos and decided that was

00:21:53.470 --> 00:21:56.849
probably a bad idea, right? Oh, yeah, definitely.

00:21:56.990 --> 00:21:59.049
Yeah, yeah. So we opted out of that. We're going

00:21:59.049 --> 00:22:02.529
to do it. All the heights, no topics. Nope, nope.

00:22:02.650 --> 00:22:05.549
So we're like, all right. So we go to the Black

00:22:05.549 --> 00:22:09.029
Market Grill at the very top. It's a chain, but

00:22:09.029 --> 00:22:12.970
it's only in cool areas like Bayside Marketplace.

00:22:13.150 --> 00:22:15.150
There's probably one over in San Francisco on

00:22:15.150 --> 00:22:17.960
the wharf. So we went to Black Market Grill,

00:22:18.019 --> 00:22:20.119
and they're famous for their drinks, and they

00:22:20.119 --> 00:22:23.960
had a kick -ass mojito that I think is raspberry

00:22:23.960 --> 00:22:25.980
mojitos is what we ordered, and they were just

00:22:25.980 --> 00:22:29.779
terrific. So we're walking out, and I see there's

00:22:29.779 --> 00:22:32.240
like four places. It's like New Orleans. In New

00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:34.700
Orleans, they have rows of daiquiri machines

00:22:34.700 --> 00:22:38.579
and bars, right? They're frozen daiquiri machines,

00:22:38.759 --> 00:22:41.880
and you walk by and go, oh, look, that's papaya.

00:22:41.900 --> 00:22:45.039
Oh, hey, look, look, look, that's mango. Hey,

00:22:45.119 --> 00:22:48.420
look, there's pineapple, right? And there's fusions,

00:22:48.420 --> 00:22:53.220
different kinds of daiquiris everywhere. So we

00:22:53.220 --> 00:22:56.380
see three places that have like 20 fucking machines

00:22:56.380 --> 00:22:58.720
in them. You just walk up and go, yeah, I'll

00:22:58.720 --> 00:23:01.599
take that blue one. I'll take that red daiquiri,

00:23:01.660 --> 00:23:06.859
that yellow one. What's that? Okay, so. So, anyhow.

00:23:07.299 --> 00:23:10.119
You were trying all kinds of shit. No, I just

00:23:10.119 --> 00:23:12.859
had one daiquiri, that was it. Yeah, you did,

00:23:13.039 --> 00:23:17.160
yeah. You could if you went. I could have, but

00:23:17.160 --> 00:23:18.940
I knew my liver was going to take a pounding

00:23:18.940 --> 00:23:21.960
on the cruise. So, you know, I'm like, you know,

00:23:22.059 --> 00:23:25.759
I better contain myself here. And that's why

00:23:25.759 --> 00:23:27.839
we opted out of the Ferris wheel. It was like,

00:23:27.920 --> 00:23:30.339
you know, I don't want to get sick today. So,

00:23:30.420 --> 00:23:36.849
I get a daiquiri. So, our flight. Fort Lauderdale

00:23:36.849 --> 00:23:40.029
was really bumpy, right? And everyone's kind

00:23:40.029 --> 00:23:42.630
of like, we hit some pockets of turbulence. It

00:23:42.630 --> 00:23:45.990
knocked the piss out of us. And I hate turbulence

00:23:45.990 --> 00:23:49.170
because it just rattles you, man. It rattles

00:23:49.170 --> 00:23:51.289
your brain. There you are, smooth sailing all

00:23:51.289 --> 00:23:56.069
of a sudden. And it's like, fuck. You know, God

00:23:56.069 --> 00:23:58.549
forbid you're drinking a Coke or something and

00:23:58.549 --> 00:24:01.549
it spills all over you. So I come to a conclusion,

00:24:01.730 --> 00:24:08.980
Rob. Planes should have daiquiri machines. If

00:24:08.980 --> 00:24:11.660
you hit turbulence, you give everybody a daiquiri

00:24:11.660 --> 00:24:17.279
and nobody will give a shit. I think that's brilliant.

00:24:17.640 --> 00:24:23.500
Come on up. Let's say Robin Marks Air. We own

00:24:23.500 --> 00:24:28.000
our own airline. Robin Marks Air. Hit the fucking

00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:31.039
bumps. Hey guys, want some daiquiris? What? Hell

00:24:31.039 --> 00:24:34.789
yeah! We got a little color -coded sheet here.

00:24:35.069 --> 00:24:38.069
Which daiquiri would you like, sir? I'll take

00:24:38.069 --> 00:24:39.930
that one in the middle, that kind of off -green

00:24:39.930 --> 00:24:42.250
one. Yeah, yeah, what is that? Oh, it's lime.

00:24:42.529 --> 00:24:45.049
Okay, bring it over. I mean, no one would give

00:24:45.049 --> 00:24:50.289
a shit. Daiquiris calm you down. Yeah, they do.

00:24:50.690 --> 00:24:53.089
Especially when you look and you see 30 of them,

00:24:53.109 --> 00:24:55.170
30 different kinds. It's like, you know what?

00:24:55.349 --> 00:24:58.910
Hit all the bumps you want. Yeah, your mind loses.

00:24:59.210 --> 00:25:05.329
You lose. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I'm like this. I'm

00:25:05.329 --> 00:25:08.809
like, you know, hey, by the time you get done

00:25:08.809 --> 00:25:10.230
with the flight, you're wishing you hit more

00:25:10.230 --> 00:25:11.950
bumps because every time you hit a bump, you

00:25:11.950 --> 00:25:15.789
get a daiquiri. I think once again, one of these

00:25:15.789 --> 00:25:18.390
great ideas that will probably never be executed.

00:25:18.470 --> 00:25:23.089
Right, Rob? Yeah. World, if it ever thinks if

00:25:23.089 --> 00:25:25.670
it ever, ever happens, you can thank Rob and

00:25:25.670 --> 00:25:28.309
I. The two douchebags and microphone are the

00:25:28.309 --> 00:25:30.509
ones that came up with this idea. And we want

00:25:30.509 --> 00:25:34.230
credit if you ever hear of it happening. And

00:25:34.230 --> 00:25:41.190
so, I got some other stuff. I'm not going to

00:25:41.190 --> 00:25:42.930
go through everything because I've got stuff

00:25:42.930 --> 00:25:46.750
I'm going to do on the next podcast because I

00:25:46.750 --> 00:25:48.970
have so much stuff to talk about. So many interesting

00:25:48.970 --> 00:25:52.250
things happen. I know you would. That's why I

00:25:52.250 --> 00:25:55.829
didn't plan many. tonight. Okay, I still got

00:25:55.829 --> 00:25:59.829
a little bit to go through here. I got a bunch

00:25:59.829 --> 00:26:03.089
of stories. I'm going to let you do your thing

00:26:03.089 --> 00:26:06.190
tonight, brother. Okay, cool. You'll be ready.

00:26:06.569 --> 00:26:10.670
Alright, so back to the TSA. Alright, Rob, I

00:26:10.670 --> 00:26:13.309
thought I was clever, right? You know how you

00:26:13.309 --> 00:26:16.490
have to remove your belt and shoes and all that

00:26:16.490 --> 00:26:21.910
bullshit, right? To go through? Okay, well, I

00:26:21.910 --> 00:26:24.430
had this brilliant idea, okay? I was under the

00:26:24.430 --> 00:26:26.730
impression that that's a metal detector you walk

00:26:26.730 --> 00:26:31.529
through. I guess it's not. I'm a dumb shit, Rob.

00:26:31.869 --> 00:26:34.890
I was thinking that because it's plastic, I had

00:26:34.890 --> 00:26:38.930
a plastic belt with a plastic hook on it, not

00:26:38.930 --> 00:26:40.970
a metal one. I was like, I can wear that going

00:26:40.970 --> 00:26:43.250
through TSA. I can wear that going through the

00:26:43.250 --> 00:26:45.289
metal detector or what I thought was the x -ray

00:26:45.289 --> 00:26:49.009
machine. And so I get through it, and the guy

00:26:49.009 --> 00:26:53.450
goes... I'm going to have to look you over. It's

00:26:53.450 --> 00:26:55.630
because you left your belt on. I said, it doesn't

00:26:55.630 --> 00:26:57.970
have any metal in it. And he goes, this is not

00:26:57.970 --> 00:27:01.009
a metal detector. This is an x -ray machine.

00:27:01.230 --> 00:27:03.769
If I see a foreign object somewhere, I have to

00:27:03.769 --> 00:27:07.069
investigate it. So I got fucking looked up because

00:27:07.069 --> 00:27:10.309
I thought I was being smart by wearing a plastic

00:27:10.309 --> 00:27:12.869
belt that I thought would go right through TSA,

00:27:13.009 --> 00:27:20.359
but did not. So... I don't know what I was thinking.

00:27:20.480 --> 00:27:22.579
I really thought that, you know. It's an x -ray

00:27:22.579 --> 00:27:27.359
machine. It's not a metal detector anymore. I

00:27:27.359 --> 00:27:30.920
guess so. Well, I know so now. But anyhow, my

00:27:30.920 --> 00:27:33.519
grand plan, you know, the brilliant idea I came

00:27:33.519 --> 00:27:37.880
up with, turns out I got frisked because of it.

00:27:38.779 --> 00:27:41.839
Yeah, people could be carrying drugs on them.

00:27:41.940 --> 00:27:44.299
Come on. I never thought of it like that either.

00:27:44.720 --> 00:27:47.579
Yeah, yeah. All right, well, they thought I had

00:27:47.579 --> 00:27:49.619
fucking, they probably thought I had some fucking

00:27:49.619 --> 00:27:54.279
smack crammed up my fucking, crammed up my pie

00:27:54.279 --> 00:27:57.000
hole or whatever, you know? So, anyhow. You're

00:27:57.000 --> 00:27:59.559
just trying to hide a belt. Just trying to hide

00:27:59.559 --> 00:28:02.220
a belt. Just trying to, I was just trying to

00:28:02.220 --> 00:28:06.440
get by the rules, right? That's it. It busted

00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:14.200
me. So, anyhow, so. We're definitely not as young

00:28:14.200 --> 00:28:18.279
as we used to be, huh? No, no. And while I was

00:28:18.279 --> 00:28:20.880
smashed on one of the sea days, I realized my

00:28:20.880 --> 00:28:25.519
opinion on, in my opinion, Doug touches Lemu

00:28:25.519 --> 00:28:32.099
Emu. Don't you think so? You know what I'm referring

00:28:32.099 --> 00:28:37.369
to? Definitely something going on. Yeah, I agree.

00:28:37.849 --> 00:28:41.289
I've never said anything. I've thought that for

00:28:41.289 --> 00:28:43.710
a long time. I just never say that. Thank you

00:28:43.710 --> 00:28:46.029
for bringing that up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think

00:28:46.029 --> 00:28:54.150
there could be some criminal charges. I think

00:28:54.150 --> 00:28:56.329
so, too. I mean, you can just look at that emu

00:28:56.329 --> 00:28:59.109
and tell it's been violated, can't you? Yeah,

00:28:59.109 --> 00:29:02.130
yeah. Allegedly and all that good shit. Even

00:29:02.130 --> 00:29:07.460
though they're fictional characters. So the morning

00:29:07.460 --> 00:29:10.339
of the cruise, I filled the Keurig pod in the

00:29:10.339 --> 00:29:12.660
hotel room with some sort of mountain -grown

00:29:12.660 --> 00:29:16.339
coffee I'd never heard of. I know now why I've

00:29:16.339 --> 00:29:18.960
never heard of it. It was horrible. It sucked.

00:29:19.440 --> 00:29:22.180
So I remember the afternoon before at Bayside

00:29:22.180 --> 00:29:23.980
Marketplace. There's a Starbucks there, right?

00:29:24.099 --> 00:29:26.940
So I'm like, all right, okay. I'll go right across

00:29:26.940 --> 00:29:30.140
the road. And I installed the app the day before

00:29:30.140 --> 00:29:32.279
because it was easier to order at the airports

00:29:32.279 --> 00:29:35.619
and stuff like that. I couldn't order anything

00:29:35.619 --> 00:29:38.019
off of it, though, because there are three Starbucks

00:29:38.019 --> 00:29:41.119
within a quarter mile radius of the of the hotel.

00:29:41.299 --> 00:29:43.259
And I didn't know the address as well enough.

00:29:43.299 --> 00:29:45.339
So I didn't know which one to go to. So I couldn't

00:29:45.339 --> 00:29:48.140
order any anything on the app and walk up there

00:29:48.140 --> 00:29:50.339
and have it ready for me. Right. So my gosh,

00:29:50.400 --> 00:29:52.000
it does kind of worthless because I don't know

00:29:52.000 --> 00:29:53.940
where Fifth Street is. I don't know where fucking

00:29:53.940 --> 00:29:59.440
Maple Road is or whatever. So so I go. And I

00:29:59.440 --> 00:30:02.240
go over to the Starbucks over there on Bayside

00:30:02.240 --> 00:30:04.359
Marketplace. It was the closest one that I could

00:30:04.359 --> 00:30:09.200
figure out. So I go to pay. I got a couple of

00:30:09.200 --> 00:30:12.359
coffees with espresso shots for me at Val to

00:30:12.359 --> 00:30:14.900
get us to going, right? So I go to pay, and the

00:30:14.900 --> 00:30:19.380
total is $12 .95 for both of us, right? Okay,

00:30:19.480 --> 00:30:22.880
$12 .95. Keep that thought in mind, Rob. $12

00:30:22.880 --> 00:30:27.460
.95, okay? Yeah. Then it had a suggested... tip

00:30:27.460 --> 00:30:36.019
amount of 20%. This 20 % was $5 .24 tip out of

00:30:36.019 --> 00:30:43.859
$12 .95. What? $12 .95 it had a suggested tip

00:30:43.859 --> 00:30:50.980
that said 20 % and that 20 % was $5 .24. That

00:30:50.980 --> 00:30:55.640
tip proportionately was probably about 40 -45%.

00:30:56.319 --> 00:30:59.660
Yeah, that's what just caught my attention. Yeah.

00:30:59.819 --> 00:31:03.299
Yeah. I asked the lady how to manually put tip

00:31:03.299 --> 00:31:05.480
money in, and she quipped, the percentages are

00:31:05.480 --> 00:31:08.400
there already. And I was like, all right, bitch.

00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:10.900
And I go, you know what? I said, I'm not a fucking

00:31:10.900 --> 00:31:14.900
stupid ass. And she goes, what? I go, I'm not

00:31:14.900 --> 00:31:17.940
a fucking stupid ass. I said, I want you to add

00:31:17.940 --> 00:31:23.670
524 up. Double it. So she's thinking, thinking,

00:31:23.670 --> 00:31:27.650
thinking. Okay, that's 1028. How much was my

00:31:27.650 --> 00:31:32.809
bill? 1295. Do you think that's 20 % at all?

00:31:33.549 --> 00:31:37.450
Uh, uh, uh, no. And I said, you know what? Fuck

00:31:37.450 --> 00:31:42.509
your tip. I walked off. I was so pissed. I can't

00:31:42.509 --> 00:31:45.230
say they did it on purpose, but how could anyone

00:31:45.230 --> 00:31:49.210
do that and not know? Are they that stupid? Or

00:31:49.210 --> 00:31:55.359
is this a scam? and I think the employees just

00:31:55.359 --> 00:32:00.180
do their job. Well, you know what? She was younger.

00:32:00.599 --> 00:32:07.400
Well, I didn't appreciate the surly attitude

00:32:07.400 --> 00:32:09.380
when I mentioned it and told her to add it up.

00:32:09.420 --> 00:32:11.740
Yeah, because she said they're kind of like,

00:32:11.799 --> 00:32:15.259
well, it's right there, it's 20%. And I'm like...

00:32:16.919 --> 00:32:21.339
No, no. And she was really surly. And then after

00:32:21.339 --> 00:32:23.940
that, she kind of like backed off a little bit

00:32:23.940 --> 00:32:27.000
because I think she realized that I don't think

00:32:27.000 --> 00:32:30.119
she did it. No, I don't think she had the mind

00:32:30.119 --> 00:32:33.319
capacity to do it. Okay. And I don't mean that

00:32:33.319 --> 00:32:35.279
like she's stupid. I think she just wasn't trained.

00:32:35.400 --> 00:32:42.880
Yeah. So what I'm saying to everybody is whenever

00:32:42.880 --> 00:32:45.920
you see a suggested tip amount, figure it out

00:32:45.920 --> 00:32:48.000
in your head or write it down and figure it out

00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:50.359
or get your phone out and calculate it. I bet

00:32:50.359 --> 00:32:53.980
you this happens more than at that place. And

00:32:53.980 --> 00:32:56.759
I'm not accusing Starbucks of anything. As far

00:32:56.759 --> 00:33:01.059
as I know, it was an accident. So anyhow, I'm

00:33:01.059 --> 00:33:02.900
just telling you this right now. I'm not saying

00:33:02.900 --> 00:33:05.779
it's deliberate. It's probably an accident. So

00:33:05.779 --> 00:33:08.180
anyone that loves Starbucks or Starbucks yourself,

00:33:08.440 --> 00:33:10.720
I still go there. I still love you guys. It was

00:33:10.720 --> 00:33:12.839
just that I caught something that I didn't think

00:33:12.839 --> 00:33:16.599
was right and I took action on it. So, anyhow,

00:33:16.839 --> 00:33:19.019
another little thing that happened is, oh, go

00:33:19.019 --> 00:33:21.680
ahead. It wouldn't have had to have been just

00:33:21.680 --> 00:33:23.980
Starbucks. It could have been any place. Either

00:33:23.980 --> 00:33:26.940
one of us would have done the same thing. Yes.

00:33:26.960 --> 00:33:29.480
Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm saying. Mistake.

00:33:29.480 --> 00:33:32.259
I don't care where you're at. We catch you doing

00:33:32.259 --> 00:33:33.880
something like that, we're going to call you

00:33:33.880 --> 00:33:36.259
out. I have nothing against Starbucks. I go there.

00:33:36.539 --> 00:33:41.420
Okay, so I'm just saying, I'm just saying, people

00:33:41.420 --> 00:33:46.519
make mistakes. Do the math for yourself. So,

00:33:46.519 --> 00:33:51.099
anyhow, I go... Good point. Yeah, I was like...

00:33:51.099 --> 00:33:54.960
But I don't think that the... Looking back at

00:33:54.960 --> 00:33:57.079
it, I don't think the young lady was being surly.

00:33:57.180 --> 00:34:00.740
I think she just was young and didn't want to

00:34:00.740 --> 00:34:03.259
try to figure it out herself. So I think she's

00:34:03.259 --> 00:34:05.720
like, well, just look at it. It says 20 % right

00:34:05.720 --> 00:34:08.659
there. I think that's all it was. She was trying

00:34:08.659 --> 00:34:13.139
to do her $12 an hour. Yeah, and I think she

00:34:13.139 --> 00:34:15.360
thought I was giving her shit when I wasn't.

00:34:15.360 --> 00:34:19.599
I wasn't pointing my finger at her. I was saying,

00:34:19.719 --> 00:34:23.400
this is wrong. And I wanted to give her a couple

00:34:23.400 --> 00:34:26.619
of bucks, but the opportunity was not there after

00:34:26.619 --> 00:34:29.579
that. I was like, forget it. Give me my fucking

00:34:29.579 --> 00:34:35.260
coffees. I'm out of here. Yeah, I'm like, you

00:34:35.260 --> 00:34:38.239
know, here's my tip. Fucking listen to me the

00:34:38.239 --> 00:34:40.440
first time and don't argue with me. That's my

00:34:40.440 --> 00:34:44.280
tip. So anyhow, my back was hurting one night.

00:34:44.460 --> 00:34:46.940
I get up and I take a stroll around the Lido

00:34:46.940 --> 00:34:49.320
deck in the open air. Always helps. You see,

00:34:49.400 --> 00:34:55.320
look, the carnival beds are too soft. Okay? Everybody

00:34:55.320 --> 00:34:58.559
else loves them, but I don't. Because carnival

00:34:58.559 --> 00:35:00.860
beds make my back hurt because I need something

00:35:00.860 --> 00:35:04.420
stiffer than that. I worked my whole life. Yes.

00:35:05.139 --> 00:35:07.739
If you worked your whole life like... me and

00:35:07.739 --> 00:35:10.500
Rob done, you would be the same way. You know,

00:35:10.500 --> 00:35:12.619
it's like concrete fills up in my joints and

00:35:12.619 --> 00:35:15.239
I can't hardly move. So I'm walking late night

00:35:15.239 --> 00:35:18.360
and I'm on the Lido deck and in the back of the

00:35:18.360 --> 00:35:21.960
Lido deck is the night snack buffet. There's

00:35:21.960 --> 00:35:24.559
quite a few cruisers in this area because it's

00:35:24.559 --> 00:35:27.460
the only free food that time of night. Room service

00:35:27.460 --> 00:35:29.820
now costs you. It didn't used to cost you, but

00:35:29.820 --> 00:35:34.880
now they charge you for room service. You know,

00:35:34.900 --> 00:35:37.320
so people make the trek up there after the bars.

00:35:37.400 --> 00:35:39.179
OK, this is like, I don't know, two in the morning.

00:35:39.219 --> 00:35:41.739
So everything just slid out. So they're up there

00:35:41.739 --> 00:35:44.260
trying to get some late night food. And, you

00:35:44.260 --> 00:35:47.260
know, people are coming out of the late clubs

00:35:47.260 --> 00:35:49.500
and all that. And, you know, I know they're probably

00:35:49.500 --> 00:35:53.019
trashed. OK, but here's what happened. There's

00:35:53.019 --> 00:35:56.199
a group of six women all huddled around the the

00:35:56.199 --> 00:36:00.739
juice dispensers. Right. And a lady yelled to

00:36:00.739 --> 00:36:02.420
a woman in a wheelchair. She goes, hey, do you

00:36:02.420 --> 00:36:05.840
want orange juice? And she said yes. Immediately,

00:36:05.920 --> 00:36:07.900
all the rest of the gang wanted orange juice

00:36:07.900 --> 00:36:10.659
as well. So I'm walking around, and I decided,

00:36:10.699 --> 00:36:12.460
you know, I come back around on another swipe,

00:36:12.579 --> 00:36:14.000
and I'm like, man, I want some orange juice.

00:36:14.380 --> 00:36:17.340
So I go over there, and there wasn't any orange

00:36:17.340 --> 00:36:20.119
juice. The machine was iced tea and lemonade

00:36:20.119 --> 00:36:26.500
only. They thought it was orange juice. You know,

00:36:26.539 --> 00:36:29.960
I don't know how you... They were buying lemonade.

00:36:31.009 --> 00:36:33.449
Yeah, they were filling up their cups of lemonade.

00:36:33.969 --> 00:36:36.429
But they said it was orange juice. The first

00:36:36.429 --> 00:36:38.610
lady started it. She yells at the lady in the

00:36:38.610 --> 00:36:40.670
wheelchair, you know, to help her out. She was

00:36:40.670 --> 00:36:42.789
part of their gang there. And she goes, hey,

00:36:42.809 --> 00:36:44.250
do you want some orange juice? She goes, oh,

00:36:44.269 --> 00:36:46.489
I'd love some orange juice. And then the rest

00:36:46.489 --> 00:36:47.809
of the chicks walked over there. Yeah, yeah,

00:36:47.829 --> 00:36:50.130
yeah, we want some orange juice. And they all

00:36:50.130 --> 00:36:52.489
start filling up their cups. So I come back around

00:36:52.489 --> 00:36:55.429
after they leave, after they clear. And I'm like,

00:36:55.489 --> 00:36:57.590
orange juice sounds pretty fucking good right

00:36:57.590 --> 00:36:59.869
now. I go over there, and it's lemonade and tea.

00:37:00.519 --> 00:37:02.639
And I was sitting there going, what the hell?

00:37:04.199 --> 00:37:10.900
It said right on their lemonade. I put some in

00:37:10.900 --> 00:37:20.400
my glass. It was lemonade. No. So anyhow. So,

00:37:20.519 --> 00:37:28.949
okay. So much shit happens just in my area. It's

00:37:28.949 --> 00:37:30.909
like God gave me a little gift to talk about.

00:37:31.630 --> 00:37:37.489
Especially if you're a people watcher. Which

00:37:37.489 --> 00:37:41.329
I am and I know you are too. You and I are a

00:37:41.329 --> 00:37:44.590
lot like that. We like sit back and watch other

00:37:44.590 --> 00:37:48.010
people do stupid shit. And a cruise is just so

00:37:48.010 --> 00:37:51.829
good to watch. There are some characters on there.

00:37:54.679 --> 00:38:01.659
I'm walking down the stairwell. Anyone that got

00:38:01.659 --> 00:38:04.039
near me would in a sunburn and sun poisoning

00:38:04.039 --> 00:38:09.280
and what have you. So I'm walking down the stairwell.

00:38:09.320 --> 00:38:13.420
This is one of the first days, okay? You know,

00:38:13.460 --> 00:38:15.559
Topher and Cindy were so nice to buy me that

00:38:15.559 --> 00:38:17.699
Button Up Hams shirt that I'm so proud of. I

00:38:17.699 --> 00:38:20.179
like, you know, it's got the Hams beer bear and

00:38:20.179 --> 00:38:23.880
it's got the trees and the Hams logo. I'm walking

00:38:23.880 --> 00:38:25.760
down the stairwell and this old man, he goes,

00:38:25.860 --> 00:38:27.539
hey, man, that's a cool shirt. And I thought

00:38:27.539 --> 00:38:30.420
he liked Hams. He gets a little bit closer, goes,

00:38:30.480 --> 00:38:33.679
oh, never mind. That doesn't say Havana. I thought

00:38:33.679 --> 00:38:35.960
it said Havana. I go, what the hell's wrong with

00:38:35.960 --> 00:38:39.420
Hams? It's a classic beer, dude. And he goes,

00:38:39.500 --> 00:38:41.719
where are you from? He goes, where are you from?

00:38:42.199 --> 00:38:44.780
I go, Kansas City. He rolls his eyes, goes, figures.

00:38:44.980 --> 00:38:46.840
And I look at him. I go, where are you from?

00:38:47.039 --> 00:38:49.619
He goes, Texas. I go, oh, you guys drink that

00:38:49.619 --> 00:38:53.800
Schlitz down there. His whole gang started fucking

00:38:53.800 --> 00:38:58.179
cracking up. What that old fucking bastard didn't

00:38:58.179 --> 00:39:00.760
know is Texas was my second home for fucking

00:39:00.760 --> 00:39:03.480
years. I know they drink Schlitz down there,

00:39:03.539 --> 00:39:05.199
and I know they fucking love it, and I know it's

00:39:05.199 --> 00:39:09.059
fucking, it's paint thinner. It's paint thinner

00:39:09.059 --> 00:39:13.559
in a can. I fucking rolled that out and his face

00:39:13.559 --> 00:39:17.480
turns red and all the people in his crowd started

00:39:17.480 --> 00:39:20.500
laughing because they knew I owned that old bitch.

00:39:23.679 --> 00:39:27.500
He got the fuck out of there. He had a big old

00:39:27.500 --> 00:39:34.579
pace. I smashed his face in it. I fooled Nelson

00:39:34.579 --> 00:39:36.840
him. I stuck him to the ground and said, you

00:39:36.840 --> 00:39:39.780
eat shit, you little Texas bastard. You eat shit.

00:39:40.099 --> 00:39:45.920
And he ate shit. So, anyhow, fucking condescending

00:39:45.920 --> 00:39:51.820
old prick. And then I mumbled, and I think he

00:39:51.820 --> 00:39:53.659
heard me. I don't know if he did. The old fucktard.

00:39:54.559 --> 00:39:56.579
You know, he didn't know Dallas was my second

00:39:56.579 --> 00:39:58.559
home for years, whether I was working or down

00:39:58.559 --> 00:40:01.099
there visiting my friend Bob. You know, Dallas

00:40:01.099 --> 00:40:04.239
was my second home. I know all about them. I

00:40:04.239 --> 00:40:08.260
know all about the Texans. So, anyhow, I kind

00:40:08.260 --> 00:40:10.860
of mumbled, you're not classy enough for hams.

00:40:11.099 --> 00:40:16.159
I think he heard it. So, anyhow, that's all I'm

00:40:16.159 --> 00:40:17.780
going to go into today. I've got a bunch more

00:40:17.780 --> 00:40:20.420
shit. You'll have to listen to the next podcast.

00:40:20.719 --> 00:40:22.880
And I got some really interesting stuff, too.

00:40:23.260 --> 00:40:28.500
So, Rob, I've talked a lot. Take the helm, please.

00:40:28.659 --> 00:40:37.780
Yeah, you have. Dude, my first story is way off

00:40:37.780 --> 00:40:41.340
of where the hell you are. That's what you do,

00:40:41.460 --> 00:40:45.760
Rob. You get me. i go one way and you go you

00:40:45.760 --> 00:40:48.079
know what mark that's funny that's cool that's

00:40:48.079 --> 00:40:52.659
cute but i got this okay okay well i have one

00:40:52.659 --> 00:40:55.480
question for you while you're on your vacation

00:40:55.480 --> 00:41:07.099
yes did you find john connor's phone number no

00:41:07.099 --> 00:41:10.199
you know what i'm talking about yes yes You know,

00:41:10.199 --> 00:41:12.119
John Connor, I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:41:12.139 --> 00:41:14.159
Did you find his phone number? No, I did not,

00:41:14.199 --> 00:41:16.460
but we need him. Have you seen some of the stories?

00:41:17.500 --> 00:41:20.579
Oh, you're getting ready to go into one. I'm

00:41:20.579 --> 00:41:24.380
about ready to read one. I know nothing. Go ahead,

00:41:24.420 --> 00:41:28.159
Rob. Yeah, yeah, we need John Connor right now.

00:41:28.679 --> 00:41:34.559
Yeah. The rise of the machines seem to be getting

00:41:34.559 --> 00:41:39.480
closer than we might think. Mm -hmm. Freaky footage

00:41:39.480 --> 00:41:43.420
captured the moment that a humanoid robot seemingly

00:41:43.420 --> 00:41:48.300
snapped and lashed out at its handlers like something

00:41:48.300 --> 00:41:51.079
out of a sci -fi thriller. Did you see the video

00:41:51.079 --> 00:41:54.760
footage, Rob? I have it in front of me. Yeah,

00:41:54.820 --> 00:42:01.980
it's insane. Dude, dude. This is what the machine

00:42:01.980 --> 00:42:06.199
uprising might look like, Belsarian TV outlet.

00:42:15.550 --> 00:42:20.849
So this is on X. Anybody can go watch this. I'm

00:42:20.849 --> 00:42:43.059
telling you, it's crazy. Oh, it is. They appear

00:42:43.059 --> 00:42:45.960
to be testing these humanoid droids' capabilities.

00:42:46.980 --> 00:42:50.900
The two are chatting away when, all of a sudden,

00:42:51.000 --> 00:42:56.900
the automated biped goes berserk, flailing its

00:42:56.900 --> 00:43:01.920
arms and legs about in a spectacle that evokes

00:43:01.920 --> 00:43:08.519
a failed prototype from the Robocop movies. I

00:43:08.519 --> 00:43:14.539
mean, it starts going off. At one point, the

00:43:14.539 --> 00:43:17.559
racing machine marches forward while swinging,

00:43:17.880 --> 00:43:23.139
dragging the stand that it's attached to, along

00:43:23.139 --> 00:44:11.929
with it as a miniature. Yeah, and that's the

00:44:11.929 --> 00:44:15.070
John Connor reference. In case someone doesn't

00:44:15.070 --> 00:44:18.070
know this, Terminator is a movie with Arnold

00:44:18.070 --> 00:44:20.769
Schwarzenegger and is about artificial intelligence

00:44:20.769 --> 00:44:24.829
taking over the world and fighting us. And that's

00:44:24.829 --> 00:44:27.070
why Rob was teasing around about John Connor's

00:44:27.070 --> 00:44:29.789
phone number because he is a guy that was going

00:44:29.789 --> 00:44:58.000
to beat the AI. Right, right. Yeah. That's John

00:44:58.000 --> 00:45:04.199
Connor's mom. Yes, yes. Yeah, there's a lot of

00:45:04.199 --> 00:45:07.659
references to it. And here's a reference to iRobot.

00:45:08.159 --> 00:45:13.780
Oh, yeah. The Will Smith movie. Yeah, dude. I

00:45:13.780 --> 00:45:20.079
mean, it's coming. We'll watch it. Wow. And these

00:45:20.079 --> 00:45:25.280
big companies are trying to bring them in. Well...

00:45:25.440 --> 00:45:27.820
When I saw that footage and realized it was China,

00:45:28.099 --> 00:45:33.760
you know, they would build it. It was an undisclosed

00:45:33.760 --> 00:45:37.980
factory in China. We have a certain degree of

00:45:37.980 --> 00:45:43.059
laws over here about AI. They do not. Just something

00:45:43.059 --> 00:45:47.380
to think about. Also, they hate us. And they

00:45:47.380 --> 00:45:50.000
hate us even more now that Trump's taking a stand

00:45:50.000 --> 00:45:53.679
against them. I could see this thing getting

00:45:53.679 --> 00:46:02.519
very, very ugly. Man, that thing was insane.

00:46:02.719 --> 00:46:05.400
It was trying to get after him. I mean, it was

00:46:05.400 --> 00:46:08.559
pissed. It had emotion. I mean, if someone came

00:46:08.559 --> 00:46:11.800
up and fucking smacked your mom, that's the kind

00:46:11.800 --> 00:46:14.460
of emotion that that robot had trying to get

00:46:14.460 --> 00:46:17.119
after those two guys. I mean, he was doing...

00:46:22.440 --> 00:46:30.139
Yeah, and it has the anger of... And it had a

00:46:30.139 --> 00:46:34.139
very unapologetic anger. I'm telling you, man,

00:46:34.179 --> 00:46:45.099
this shit's going to get ugly. Yeah, this is

00:46:45.099 --> 00:46:51.590
going to get horrible. So, yeah. Maybe the reason

00:46:51.590 --> 00:46:53.889
you want to go out in the woods and make a home

00:46:53.889 --> 00:46:56.590
and have a bunker like Rob does down there in

00:46:56.590 --> 00:46:59.789
Camdenton is not because of nuclear war. Maybe

00:46:59.789 --> 00:47:01.349
it's because these robots are going to start

00:47:01.349 --> 00:47:04.650
killing you. I don't know. So anyhow, man, Rob,

00:47:04.730 --> 00:47:08.210
thank you. They got to find me. I'm glad you

00:47:08.210 --> 00:47:10.329
covered that story. I got that story right here

00:47:10.329 --> 00:47:13.130
because I saw that. My jaw just dropped. I'm

00:47:13.130 --> 00:47:15.329
like, oh, this is the shit we've been talking

00:47:15.329 --> 00:47:19.789
about. Like, oh, my God. John Connor. Yep. This

00:47:19.789 --> 00:47:22.329
is the shit we've been talking about. It's got

00:47:22.329 --> 00:47:25.250
to go on our first night back. Thank you, Rob.

00:47:26.369 --> 00:47:29.230
You're welcome. Well, let's come back with some

00:47:29.230 --> 00:47:32.389
emails. Does that sound good? Yeah, let's take

00:47:32.389 --> 00:47:34.650
our break. We're running a little late. A little?

00:47:35.170 --> 00:47:39.650
Okay. And I'm working overtime. But you know

00:47:39.650 --> 00:47:42.469
what? It feels good to be back, everybody. It

00:47:42.469 --> 00:47:45.090
really does. I was chomping at the bit, too.

00:47:45.190 --> 00:47:49.829
We did that about two hours of podcasting. Friday

00:47:49.829 --> 00:47:53.070
on the boat but I mean we did as good as we could

00:47:53.070 --> 00:47:56.110
the internet on this boat was shitty and it kept

00:47:56.110 --> 00:47:58.309
popping in and out and after I heard it I kind

00:47:58.309 --> 00:48:00.829
of grimaced because you couldn't help but talk

00:48:00.829 --> 00:48:02.829
over each other because you didn't hear somebody

00:48:02.829 --> 00:48:05.170
it was on the delay and you think nobody's talking

00:48:05.170 --> 00:48:07.030
all of a sudden you go and then all of a sudden

00:48:07.030 --> 00:48:10.889
yeah so alright we'll be right back you and I

00:48:10.889 --> 00:48:14.030
not seeing each other is bad enough we've done

00:48:14.030 --> 00:48:17.639
it for I think we're doing it pretty good now,

00:48:17.780 --> 00:48:20.820
but we didn't get it at first. Right. We are.

00:48:22.059 --> 00:48:25.119
I've learned a lot of things, you know, over

00:48:25.119 --> 00:48:29.719
the time. And we get it. Rob, I listen to old

00:48:29.719 --> 00:48:31.980
shows and listen to you now. And I told you,

00:48:32.000 --> 00:48:34.340
it's not something you can pinpoint. It's just

00:48:34.340 --> 00:48:38.780
something that happens, isn't it? We do it. Yep.

00:48:38.800 --> 00:48:46.769
All right. All right. Break. Have you ever wondered

00:48:46.769 --> 00:48:49.010
what something is about? Have you ever looked

00:48:49.010 --> 00:48:50.829
at something and said, Hmm, I wonder what the

00:48:50.829 --> 00:48:54.570
origin of that is? Well, so have we. That's why

00:48:54.570 --> 00:48:59.449
we give you The Origin of... The Origin of Velcro.

00:48:59.570 --> 00:49:02.469
George D. Mestrel found inspiration in his most

00:49:02.469 --> 00:49:04.929
famous invention in those annoying little burrs

00:49:04.929 --> 00:49:07.469
that can get stuck to your clothing after a walk

00:49:07.469 --> 00:49:09.809
in the woods. They came from the burdock plant,

00:49:09.949 --> 00:49:12.969
and when D. Mestrel... Put them under a microscope,

00:49:13.130 --> 00:49:15.130
he realized that they made use of little tiny

00:49:15.130 --> 00:49:18.489
hooks on the surface of the burr to grab onto

00:49:18.489 --> 00:49:22.949
whatever passes by. Hey there, fuckstick. You're

00:49:22.949 --> 00:49:25.170
just in time for brand new feature news nobody

00:49:25.170 --> 00:49:28.449
gives a shit about. The very last meal on the

00:49:28.449 --> 00:49:33.369
Titanic before it went down was lamb with mint

00:49:33.369 --> 00:49:38.610
sauce. So you want proof that we love you here

00:49:38.610 --> 00:49:41.530
at Q -Douche Bates and Microphone Central? Here's

00:49:41.530 --> 00:49:43.630
a proof right here. How about the drink of the

00:49:43.630 --> 00:49:47.369
week? Hey there, you little snack cakes. This

00:49:47.369 --> 00:49:50.769
is Norwegian's Best Drinks. Norwegian Cruise

00:49:50.769 --> 00:49:52.809
Lime has long been known as one of the best drink

00:49:52.809 --> 00:49:55.409
bakers on the high seas, if not the best. In

00:49:55.409 --> 00:49:56.969
this drink, it's no different. It's one of the

00:49:56.969 --> 00:49:59.610
most popular, and it's really good. A smoked

00:49:59.610 --> 00:50:04.050
peach margarita. It involves one ounce of 1800

00:50:04.050 --> 00:50:07.550
silver tequila, one half ounce in this cow, a

00:50:07.550 --> 00:50:10.949
quarter ounce of triple suck. Half ounce of organic

00:50:10.949 --> 00:50:14.269
agave. Half ounce of peach puree. And one half

00:50:14.269 --> 00:50:17.369
ounces of fresh wine juice. Garnished with hibiscus

00:50:17.369 --> 00:50:20.889
salt on the rim and dried blood orange slices

00:50:20.889 --> 00:50:24.570
on the rim. Add all ingredients and shake. And

00:50:24.570 --> 00:50:27.690
don't be bashful. Shake like nuts. And then print

00:50:27.690 --> 00:50:32.730
in a glass with crushed ice and enjoy. You watched

00:50:32.730 --> 00:50:36.989
the news. It looks grim. Is an apocalypse inevitable?

00:50:37.960 --> 00:50:40.599
We suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand

00:50:40.599 --> 00:50:44.820
and have multiple mobile chargers. We have a

00:50:44.820 --> 00:50:51.980
host of podcasts. Make sure and have plenty of

00:50:51.980 --> 00:50:56.019
rope. Strong, threaded, durable rope with a rating

00:50:56.019 --> 00:50:59.909
of 400 pounds or greater. You need to know basic

00:50:59.909 --> 00:51:02.789
knots, so you can go to the library and download

00:51:02.789 --> 00:51:05.429
the Boy Scouts Handbook and have a reference

00:51:05.429 --> 00:51:09.030
to slip knots and other essential rope tricks.

00:51:09.409 --> 00:51:12.769
Rope can be used in traps to catch food or would

00:51:12.769 --> 00:51:16.710
-be predators. Rope is a key ingredient in post

00:51:16.710 --> 00:51:21.230
-apocalypse survival. Two douchebags, a microphone,

00:51:21.309 --> 00:51:24.610
and an effort to keep everything fresh. We offer

00:51:24.610 --> 00:51:30.019
you First World Problems. My new crime series

00:51:30.019 --> 00:51:33.400
TV show is going off for at least three months.

00:51:33.679 --> 00:51:36.280
I can't believe this. What am I going to do to

00:51:36.280 --> 00:51:39.000
fill in the time? Don't these guys think of this?

00:51:41.119 --> 00:51:48.079
Jam X. What the hell happened? You were the generation

00:51:48.079 --> 00:51:53.320
of change. You never wanted to be one of them.

00:51:54.019 --> 00:51:59.789
Apathy spoke for you. Fuck the man. Fuck the

00:51:59.789 --> 00:52:04.449
system. What the hell happened? The generation

00:52:04.449 --> 00:52:07.610
of angst? The generation of non -compliance?

00:52:08.690 --> 00:52:12.690
Is now buying a boat? You're really fed up to

00:52:12.690 --> 00:52:16.190
kill someone who dangled a dollar near you? Great

00:52:16.190 --> 00:52:26.500
job, Xers. Everything's ruined. Rob consumed

00:52:26.500 --> 00:52:30.280
small doses of radiation for 30 years. 30 years.

00:52:30.300 --> 00:52:35.519
Rob is immune to radiation. Watch him glow. Watch

00:52:35.519 --> 00:52:39.579
Rob Red jump up 25 feet and grab birds out of

00:52:39.579 --> 00:52:43.820
thin air with his mouth. With his mouth. Rob

00:52:43.820 --> 00:52:46.679
can now be a legend for children's parties and

00:52:46.679 --> 00:52:50.519
barments, fellas. That's right. Come on and rent

00:52:50.519 --> 00:52:53.840
you a Rob today. That's right. Come by and rent

00:52:53.840 --> 00:52:59.349
Rob. For a day! A day! A day! Watch Rob consume

00:52:59.349 --> 00:53:02.230
seven bottles of night cream and still break

00:53:02.230 --> 00:53:06.849
dance and moonwalk. Watch Rob Redd fart down

00:53:06.849 --> 00:53:11.610
a building. Fart down a building! Rob Redd assumes

00:53:11.610 --> 00:53:14.329
no responsibility whatsoever. He is not a babysitter

00:53:14.329 --> 00:53:15.769
and he doesn't give one hell of a shit about

00:53:15.769 --> 00:53:17.710
your children. Please remember to corral every

00:53:17.710 --> 00:53:20.050
little bastard you have before Rob gets there

00:53:20.050 --> 00:53:22.610
and Walt will not put up with any backtalk. He

00:53:22.610 --> 00:53:24.670
will promptly get them in the place. Rob Bragg

00:53:24.670 --> 00:53:26.929
assumes no responsibility for anything that could

00:53:26.929 --> 00:53:29.610
be stolen from his visit. Rob Bragg has no responsibility

00:53:29.610 --> 00:53:31.849
whatsoever in any help him of any situation.

00:53:32.730 --> 00:53:48.550
Read a Rob today. Two douchebags, a microphone

00:53:48.550 --> 00:53:52.730
on Mark in the Kansas City chapter of the. Blue

00:53:52.730 --> 00:53:58.809
River Arm. And I am Rob at the beautiful Niagara

00:53:58.809 --> 00:54:02.489
Arm of Lake of the Ozarks. Why, thank you, Rob.

00:54:02.630 --> 00:54:05.429
That was a great introduction, and you always

00:54:05.429 --> 00:54:11.610
do Lake of the Ozarks proud. I try. All right,

00:54:11.690 --> 00:54:13.269
we got some emails. You want to get to them?

00:54:17.849 --> 00:54:20.530
I've got a bunch more I got to sort through them.

00:54:20.570 --> 00:54:22.550
So if you sent something out the last couple

00:54:22.550 --> 00:54:24.789
of weeks, I was out at, you know, I was on the

00:54:24.789 --> 00:54:29.690
boat. So I'm going to get to them. Just give

00:54:29.690 --> 00:54:31.769
me a little bit of time. All right. The first

00:54:31.769 --> 00:54:35.590
one. Hey, douches. How about you guys sponsor

00:54:35.590 --> 00:54:39.849
a new show? The Mitch and Ronnie show. I'm not

00:54:39.849 --> 00:54:46.329
kidding. Wallen Tabazo in Athens, Texas. Wallin.

00:54:46.409 --> 00:54:51.250
W -A -L -L -I -N. Wallin or Wally or whatever

00:54:51.250 --> 00:54:57.110
they call you. I think that's a great idea. These

00:54:57.110 --> 00:55:03.889
two... No, no, no. No? Okay. I don't think Ronnie

00:55:03.889 --> 00:55:07.010
and Mitch would actually get along. Oh, you know

00:55:07.010 --> 00:55:10.769
what? I think you're right. Ronnie is more off

00:55:10.769 --> 00:55:15.050
the wall. Mitch is more off the wall. Mitch is

00:55:15.050 --> 00:55:18.929
insane. We don't know what he's up to. Ronnie

00:55:18.929 --> 00:55:23.889
is grounded. He's calculated. You're right. You're

00:55:23.889 --> 00:55:28.449
right. Yeah. No, no, no, no. I disagree. Okay.

00:55:29.170 --> 00:55:31.750
You know what? That's cool. And if more people

00:55:31.750 --> 00:55:34.170
yell for it and if them, too, say that they want

00:55:34.170 --> 00:55:36.449
to do it, we can give them, like, a one show

00:55:36.449 --> 00:55:39.750
and see how it goes. Sound okay? And you're welcome.

00:55:39.889 --> 00:55:42.389
And you're welcome, Ronnie, for me getting you

00:55:42.389 --> 00:55:49.659
out of that. Ronnie likes you better anyhow,

00:55:49.760 --> 00:55:53.800
so you know what? Yes. I think he would agree,

00:55:54.000 --> 00:55:57.760
too. I think so, too. Ronnie is your biggest

00:55:57.760 --> 00:56:01.300
fan, Rob. He's fucking nuts about you. So, yeah.

00:56:01.639 --> 00:56:05.679
Yep. There you go, Ronnie. Your boy here did

00:56:05.679 --> 00:56:12.949
you a favor. So, speaking of which, Mark. Enjoy

00:56:12.949 --> 00:56:15.309
your cruise on the islands. I'm boarding the

00:56:15.309 --> 00:56:17.869
Fuckhammer cruise on the beautiful Massey Creek

00:56:17.869 --> 00:56:25.769
arm of Lake Freeman. Mitch. They have the monster

00:56:25.769 --> 00:56:28.590
rock cruises and that shit and the rock cruises

00:56:28.590 --> 00:56:30.750
and all that. Well, I guess there's a Fuckhammer

00:56:30.750 --> 00:56:33.590
cruise on the Massey Creek arm of Lake Freeman.

00:56:36.289 --> 00:56:39.699
Mitch, enjoy. I'm sorry, I will not be able to

00:56:39.699 --> 00:56:42.659
attend. I got to attend to a little bit of skin

00:56:42.659 --> 00:56:46.900
peeling. I can't do it. Otherwise... Yeah, man.

00:56:47.340 --> 00:56:51.239
Yeah, man. I got Ozark Tampa Theater right here.

00:56:51.300 --> 00:56:54.639
I just bought two tickets to see Darius Rucker.

00:56:54.820 --> 00:56:57.039
I mean, you know, so... Well, there you go, Mitch.

00:56:57.239 --> 00:57:00.460
Neither one of us can make it. You go see your

00:57:00.460 --> 00:57:03.699
fuckhammer. Go enjoy fuckhammer. I'm sure they're

00:57:03.699 --> 00:57:09.769
great. Mitch, we love you. We're all just joking.

00:57:09.929 --> 00:57:15.090
Yes, we do. We love your comedy. He's awesome.

00:57:16.510 --> 00:57:20.190
Hey, friends. I would like a top seven of Nipple

00:57:20.190 --> 00:57:23.230
Yank, Ass Cheek Bite, and Nut Flick, and Why.

00:57:23.750 --> 00:57:27.510
Love you guys. Ronnie and Tulsa, the Tulsa King.

00:57:36.909 --> 00:57:39.570
to do this. And it's right back at you. We want

00:57:39.570 --> 00:57:44.449
one from you. That's 21 names. We have one week.

00:57:44.690 --> 00:57:48.710
Yep. And yes, like Mark has said, right back

00:57:48.710 --> 00:57:52.710
at you, buddy. Yep. You know the rules, Ronnie.

00:57:52.889 --> 00:57:56.469
You give us a question, we bounce it, we boomerang

00:57:56.469 --> 00:57:59.510
it around and give it right back to you. Yeah,

00:57:59.510 --> 00:58:03.110
we grab that magic mirror. Yep. Even though I

00:58:03.110 --> 00:58:10.369
know you don't like it, I know you hate it. I

00:58:10.369 --> 00:58:14.889
know. Sorry, Tulsa King. Even though you love

00:58:14.889 --> 00:58:21.190
Rob. All right, next. Mark, I have food wars

00:58:21.190 --> 00:58:24.289
for you and Rob to do. How about spices against

00:58:24.289 --> 00:58:29.210
each other? Bev in Orlando. No, Ontario. Yeah.

00:58:30.829 --> 00:58:33.469
We'll pit spices up against each other. What

00:58:33.469 --> 00:58:42.809
do you think, a week? It doesn't say. Here, I'll

00:58:42.809 --> 00:58:45.269
read it again. It says, Mark, I have a food wars

00:58:45.269 --> 00:58:48.750
for you and Rob to do. Okay. How about pitting

00:58:48.750 --> 00:58:52.789
spices against each other? Bev in Ontario. I

00:58:52.789 --> 00:58:58.309
think that's a pretty good idea. Okay. Okay.

00:58:58.949 --> 00:59:04.030
Here's what we do then. Okay. We follow Tulsa

00:59:04.030 --> 00:59:09.750
King's rules. Seven. We pick seven spices. Okay.

00:59:10.400 --> 00:59:14.260
And then when we go to battle, we each throw

00:59:14.260 --> 00:59:17.619
one out. How's that? That sounds good. Like,

00:59:17.619 --> 00:59:19.940
let's say I throw oregano out there and you throw

00:59:19.940 --> 00:59:23.440
out cayenne pepper. Then we talk about who wins.

00:59:23.480 --> 00:59:27.920
Right, right, right. That might be what she's

00:59:27.920 --> 00:59:30.840
thinking about. I don't know. Okay, Bev, if it's

00:59:30.840 --> 00:59:34.280
any different, let us know. Yeah, I say we go

00:59:34.280 --> 00:59:40.809
Tulsa King rules. Okay. We have a battle. That

00:59:40.809 --> 00:59:43.929
sounds good. Okay, so, Bev, if you meant anything

00:59:43.929 --> 00:59:47.550
different, write us back. But until then, that's

00:59:47.550 --> 00:59:53.949
what we'll do in a week. Yeah, yeah, let's give

00:59:53.949 --> 00:59:57.989
it a, yeah. So, next Tuesday. All right, hey,

00:59:58.110 --> 01:00:02.690
hello. We can do that between, this is Tuesday.

01:00:02.789 --> 01:00:06.090
We can have that by Sunday. Okay, Sunday we'll

01:00:06.090 --> 01:00:13.000
do that. We got a week. Yes. Yeah, Tulsa King,

01:00:13.099 --> 01:00:15.199
sorry, but that'll give you time to come up with

01:00:15.199 --> 01:00:21.880
yours, right? Yeah. All right, next. Mark, what

01:00:21.880 --> 01:00:29.760
is your famous biscuit recipe? These guys. Let

01:00:29.760 --> 01:00:33.460
me do this again. This is so fucked up. Mark,

01:00:33.519 --> 01:00:36.360
what is your famous biscuit recipe I keep hearing

01:00:36.360 --> 01:00:43.239
about? Thanks in advance, Telly. Um, Rob, my

01:00:43.239 --> 01:00:48.460
biscuit recipe that I won't quit talking about.

01:00:50.579 --> 01:00:58.159
Oh, oh, just like the banana pudding. My biscuit

01:00:58.159 --> 01:01:01.900
recipe is this thing called Pillsbury. You can

01:01:01.900 --> 01:01:05.960
find it in tubes. My suggestion is to read the

01:01:05.960 --> 01:01:09.429
directions on back and heat up your oven. Pre

01:01:09.429 --> 01:01:14.010
preheat at 375 and then probably 10 to 15 minutes.

01:01:15.150 --> 01:01:20.449
You hit that Pillsbury canister. You hit it on

01:01:20.449 --> 01:01:22.750
the side of a table and it pops. It's really

01:01:22.750 --> 01:01:25.489
cool. And all these delicious, wonderful biscuits

01:01:25.489 --> 01:01:28.829
pop out, but they're not cooked yet. So the secret

01:01:28.829 --> 01:01:32.329
is, is to have those biscuits not stick to your

01:01:32.329 --> 01:01:36.610
pan. And here's the real, real. This is a real.

01:01:37.250 --> 01:01:40.269
This is the whole thing of it right here. This

01:01:40.269 --> 01:01:44.329
is the real labor in it. You have to butter your

01:01:44.329 --> 01:01:47.090
pan. This is the secret, isn't it, Rob, right?

01:01:47.170 --> 01:01:49.150
We're telling you something that a lot of people

01:01:49.150 --> 01:01:53.889
don't know, right, Rob? Oh, no. Oh, yeah. Yeah,

01:01:54.010 --> 01:01:55.809
you definitely got to butter the pan. Yeah, you

01:01:55.809 --> 01:01:59.389
butter the pan. For sure. And if there's 12 biscuits,

01:01:59.590 --> 01:02:01.230
you lay them out, but not to where they'll touch

01:02:01.230 --> 01:02:10.170
each other when they blow up. Uh -huh. And I'll

01:02:10.170 --> 01:02:13.989
smear it around. Then I'll flip it over and smear

01:02:13.989 --> 01:02:18.929
that on. See? Yeah, you use a lot of butter for

01:02:18.929 --> 01:02:21.070
biscuits. You really do. I was wondering when

01:02:21.070 --> 01:02:23.050
someone was going to ask us, Rob, about our famous

01:02:23.050 --> 01:02:27.690
biscuit recipe. Didn't you? We talk about it

01:02:27.690 --> 01:02:31.170
all the time. Not really, but hey, off the wall,

01:02:31.289 --> 01:02:33.389
yeah, that's it. Yeah, I mean, you've got to

01:02:33.389 --> 01:02:36.190
have a lot of butter on the pan, and you smear

01:02:36.190 --> 01:02:43.550
it in there. There's a top. See? Man, Rob, you

01:02:43.550 --> 01:02:52.050
ought to do a cooking show. Okay, next. Why is

01:02:52.050 --> 01:02:54.809
there two douchebag Facebook pages? Are you aware

01:02:54.809 --> 01:02:58.130
of this? Maybe you could look at it and see if

01:02:58.130 --> 01:03:04.559
one is fake. Jerry and OP. Yeah, yeah, Topher

01:03:04.559 --> 01:03:07.239
did that one. We use the newer one, although

01:03:07.239 --> 01:03:09.159
every now and then Topher and I will throw something

01:03:09.159 --> 01:03:11.480
up when we're live at the city market because

01:03:11.480 --> 01:03:14.579
Rob has control of the newer one and Topher has

01:03:14.579 --> 01:03:17.360
control of the older one and I have control of

01:03:17.360 --> 01:03:19.920
the email. You see, it's all divvied out equally.

01:03:20.440 --> 01:03:23.059
So if we're doing a show at the city market,

01:03:23.139 --> 01:03:24.920
every now and then Topher will throw one on the

01:03:24.920 --> 01:03:28.920
old page, but generally, usually Rob's one is

01:03:28.920 --> 01:03:35.550
the one that gets access the most. Yeah, you

01:03:35.550 --> 01:03:37.969
know what? I didn't post until like two hours

01:03:37.969 --> 01:03:40.070
before we were going on the hike, and we're back.

01:03:40.510 --> 01:03:45.750
I like that, too. That's cool. Hey, like I said,

01:03:45.849 --> 01:03:49.030
I'm working overtime, man. Hey, here's what I

01:03:49.030 --> 01:03:52.809
like. This guy found two pages of ours, so other

01:03:52.809 --> 01:03:56.090
people are finding it, too. Yeah, good, good.

01:03:56.429 --> 01:04:01.030
Yeah, so good to do. Where is it? Jerry in Overland

01:04:01.030 --> 01:04:04.210
Park. Thank you. Yeah, OP is what it says. I'm

01:04:04.210 --> 01:04:05.610
pretty sure that means Overland Park. Thank you,

01:04:05.670 --> 01:04:10.670
Jerry. Of course it is. This next one, I forgot

01:04:10.670 --> 01:04:14.309
about it, Rob. Okay. Oh, shit. You're laughing.

01:04:14.369 --> 01:04:18.650
That's, oh, shit. This is for you, Rob. Rob.

01:04:18.750 --> 01:04:22.670
Uh -oh. Rob, I can peel a scab off my forearm

01:04:22.670 --> 01:04:27.469
without tearing it. Josh and Casey. That's solid.

01:04:33.630 --> 01:04:39.670
And what does that have to do with me? Just saying.

01:04:41.869 --> 01:04:44.309
Hey, I'm impressed that the guy can tear a scab

01:04:44.309 --> 01:04:52.429
off without it fucking... Josh and KC, I want

01:04:52.429 --> 01:05:01.130
video or it didn't happen. Right, Rob? Oh. Well,

01:05:01.170 --> 01:05:43.030
you see? What happened at work? Yeah, yeah Oh,

01:05:43.030 --> 01:05:45.070
yeah, yeah. I know the setup that you do. My

01:05:45.070 --> 01:05:48.429
stands with rollers. That's what my rollers are.

01:05:48.550 --> 01:05:54.329
They feed into my saw. Mm -hmm. Well, I have

01:05:54.329 --> 01:05:59.510
two sets. They're together by my big door where

01:05:59.510 --> 01:06:03.210
I put, you know, get up on there. Mm -hmm. And

01:06:03.210 --> 01:06:06.929
when I'm working with the little steel, I take

01:06:06.929 --> 01:06:11.289
my right hand, which is my dominant hand. Uh

01:06:11.289 --> 01:06:18.320
-huh. and bring it right in between them two

01:06:18.320 --> 01:06:25.239
sets of rollers. Well, yesterday I miscalculated

01:06:25.239 --> 01:06:33.099
one. Oh. And I felt my finger, because what I

01:06:33.099 --> 01:06:35.960
do is I get it up over the rollers, and then

01:06:35.960 --> 01:06:39.619
my left hand, you know, I have wrapped around,

01:06:39.800 --> 01:06:42.139
bring it up, you know, both of them on the bottom.

01:06:42.320 --> 01:07:35.420
Mm -hmm. You know? Yes. It's a blood blister

01:07:35.420 --> 01:07:40.800
that blows out. And that is painful. And it's

01:07:40.800 --> 01:08:02.550
from the corner of my fingernail. You know what,

01:08:02.590 --> 01:08:05.550
Rob? I'm lost. I'm having a hard time holding

01:08:05.550 --> 01:08:08.190
a pen right now because I have it wrapped up.

01:08:08.469 --> 01:08:14.869
Oh. And, of course, all the way up to about 11

01:08:14.869 --> 01:08:18.170
o 'clock this morning, I was hitting on anything

01:08:18.170 --> 01:08:21.909
and everything. That's a rule. That's what you

01:08:21.909 --> 01:08:25.010
do. You know how that goes. Yeah. I think I told

01:08:25.010 --> 01:08:28.609
you about a guy I used to work with. He was finishing

01:08:28.609 --> 01:08:32.210
out the top of a dish table. And his grinder

01:08:32.210 --> 01:08:35.890
caught his index finger and cut it over halfway.

01:08:36.810 --> 01:08:39.770
And he wrapped it up really good. And he showed

01:08:39.770 --> 01:08:41.170
me. He goes, Mark. He goes, come here. He goes,

01:08:41.250 --> 01:08:43.369
look at this. There's blood everywhere. And his

01:08:43.369 --> 01:08:45.750
finger's kind of dangling. He wrapped it up really

01:08:45.750 --> 01:08:47.390
good. I go, dude, man, you need to go to the

01:08:47.390 --> 01:08:51.149
hospital. He goes, no, no. He worked all day

01:08:51.149 --> 01:08:53.909
because he would fail his piss test. And then

01:08:53.909 --> 01:08:59.960
he went to the doctor. What a trooper. No, I'm

01:08:59.960 --> 01:09:01.760
not saying that. I'm just saying, man, that dude

01:09:01.760 --> 01:09:05.340
was a trooper. He worked all day with that wrapped

01:09:05.340 --> 01:09:08.279
up. I do it all the time. Yeah, all these. I

01:09:08.279 --> 01:09:11.960
work the rest of the day. That's who I am. No,

01:09:12.720 --> 01:09:14.579
I know that, Rob. I know you're a hard worker.

01:09:14.720 --> 01:09:20.779
I mean, I've got band -aids. I've got wrap. I've

01:09:20.779 --> 01:09:30.279
got a message cabinet in my bag. might need,

01:09:30.420 --> 01:09:35.539
I got, you know? Yeah. And, yeah, I mean, shit

01:09:35.539 --> 01:09:38.979
happens. We gotta keep going. Yeah, you can't

01:09:38.979 --> 01:09:41.180
keep doing that much type of work at one time

01:09:41.180 --> 01:09:43.800
and not get hurt. Let's finish out these emails

01:09:43.800 --> 01:09:47.880
and then we'll go to a break and then go to a

01:09:47.880 --> 01:09:51.159
story. Okay. Mark, you know so much about KC

01:09:51.159 --> 01:09:54.600
Radio. I swear. Write a book. I would buy it

01:09:54.600 --> 01:09:57.220
right now. Josh and Liberty, and I don't think

01:09:57.220 --> 01:09:59.579
it's the same one from Josh and KC, the previous

01:09:59.579 --> 01:10:04.000
email. I think he would have put KC on it or

01:10:04.000 --> 01:10:06.720
something, so we knew it was him. So Josh and

01:10:06.720 --> 01:10:09.399
Liberty, I believe, is a totally different person

01:10:09.399 --> 01:10:14.659
than Josh and KC. So, Josh, thank you, and I

01:10:14.659 --> 01:10:16.159
should know a lot about it. It's always been

01:10:16.159 --> 01:10:19.159
my fascination. Like I said, I almost went into

01:10:19.159 --> 01:10:22.100
it. I was going to school for it, but, you know,

01:10:22.119 --> 01:10:25.779
it's like pay for the schooling. and be an intern

01:10:25.779 --> 01:10:27.819
for somewhere for 10 years, and hopefully you

01:10:27.819 --> 01:10:30.399
land on the air somewhere and make okay money.

01:10:30.840 --> 01:10:33.300
It's so hard to get that one position that makes

01:10:33.300 --> 01:10:35.119
all the money, you know, like a morning show

01:10:35.119 --> 01:10:38.060
guy or whatever. And then the union came along

01:10:38.060 --> 01:10:42.399
and said, Hey, Mark, we will take you in. We

01:10:42.399 --> 01:10:45.380
will pay for your schooling, and we will pay

01:10:45.380 --> 01:10:48.680
you $23 an hour. This is back in the early 90s.

01:10:48.859 --> 01:10:52.560
We'll pay you $23 an hour to go to school and

01:10:52.560 --> 01:10:55.010
work. So what the hell was I supposed to do?

01:10:55.550 --> 01:10:58.789
And also, like I said, I, I'm very comfortable

01:10:58.789 --> 01:11:02.189
in life and I'm happy. And I, you know, I don't

01:11:02.189 --> 01:11:03.689
know how it would have turned out the other way.

01:11:03.770 --> 01:11:09.350
So I'm going to say I did. Okay. So anyhow, where

01:11:09.350 --> 01:11:12.510
did that come? Oh, oh, oh, radio. It's always,

01:11:12.550 --> 01:11:14.869
I've always loved it. I mean, like I said, you

01:11:14.869 --> 01:11:17.789
know, I used to listen WLS at nights and it would

01:11:17.789 --> 01:11:23.899
come in. because the 980, 890, no, 980, it's

01:11:23.899 --> 01:11:28.359
890, that's right, 890. 890 got to turn its power

01:11:28.359 --> 01:11:30.579
up at night as a clear channel, and the local

01:11:30.579 --> 01:11:33.100
channel had to turn its power down. And the clear

01:11:33.100 --> 01:11:34.939
channel was set up to where it could go nation

01:11:34.939 --> 01:11:36.960
to nation with news and information if anything

01:11:36.960 --> 01:11:39.619
happened. And that's what they called a clear

01:11:39.619 --> 01:11:43.680
channel. So WLS was a hot, rocking, fucking flamethrower.

01:11:44.250 --> 01:11:49.630
back in the early 80s, late 70s. And they had

01:11:49.630 --> 01:11:53.710
guys like Jerry Landecker, Records Landecker,

01:11:53.850 --> 01:11:55.609
I think was his name, and a bunch of guys like

01:11:55.609 --> 01:11:58.750
that that were really good DJs. And I would hear

01:11:58.750 --> 01:12:01.670
the music that you would hear on KY a week later.

01:12:01.829 --> 01:12:05.310
I would hear it first on WLS at night. And so

01:12:05.310 --> 01:12:07.050
I'd go in there, and as soon as they heard that

01:12:07.050 --> 01:12:08.989
music on KY, I'd tell them what it was. Yeah,

01:12:09.109 --> 01:12:10.829
that's Don Felder, heavy metal. How the fuck

01:12:10.829 --> 01:12:13.819
do you know? I'm just with it, man. Just with

01:12:13.819 --> 01:12:18.819
it. Well, while you're talking about those radio

01:12:18.819 --> 01:12:23.079
stations, I'm going to throw an old radio station

01:12:23.079 --> 01:12:29.279
out of the late 80s, Z Rock out of Kansas City.

01:12:29.359 --> 01:12:32.420
Yeah, that's where Johnny Darin, Greg, originated.

01:12:32.600 --> 01:12:35.979
That's where Johnny Darin got his start. Yes.

01:12:36.140 --> 01:12:40.579
And they played the best music around. Yeah,

01:12:40.619 --> 01:12:42.659
they did, and let me throw something at you.

01:12:42.800 --> 01:12:45.640
They were playing the harder stuff when nobody

01:12:45.640 --> 01:12:48.680
was quite getting into the harder stuff, you

01:12:48.680 --> 01:12:51.880
know, but they were starting to get there. Z

01:12:51.880 --> 01:12:54.779
-Rock did it, and they brought it through Kansas

01:12:54.779 --> 01:12:58.020
City. Yeah, and people who don't think that Kansas

01:12:58.020 --> 01:13:01.279
City Radio was all that, let me mention some

01:13:01.279 --> 01:13:05.880
names. That was an AM station. Yeah, so you have

01:13:05.880 --> 01:13:08.699
Johnny and Greg of the famous Johnny Deere Morning

01:13:08.699 --> 01:13:12.569
Show. OK, you had Man Cal there at that time,

01:13:12.569 --> 01:13:15.890
too, I believe. And you had Randy Miller. And

01:13:15.890 --> 01:13:19.090
I think maybe Rusty Humphries is a national radio

01:13:19.090 --> 01:13:21.229
guy. I don't know if he still does it. He was

01:13:21.229 --> 01:13:23.430
like one of the producers or a writer or something

01:13:23.430 --> 01:13:26.630
for Randy Miller. And there's more names. I mean,

01:13:26.630 --> 01:13:29.109
that that whole thing that they had there had

01:13:29.109 --> 01:13:32.590
so much talent. It was unreal. And there's so

01:13:32.590 --> 01:13:36.189
much different radio that spawned from it. So,

01:13:36.270 --> 01:13:39.409
but Z Rock AM 1030. It was fantastic. I loved

01:13:39.409 --> 01:13:43.149
it. I listened to it every day. And Johnny is

01:13:43.149 --> 01:13:46.949
a cool guy. So, anyhow. Let's take our second

01:13:46.949 --> 01:13:57.989
break. And we'll come right back. Your mama's

01:13:57.989 --> 01:14:02.409
so fat, Dracula bit her neck and got diabetes.

01:14:03.010 --> 01:14:06.170
Hey, everybody. This is Uncle Rob. I'm going

01:14:06.170 --> 01:14:10.630
to give you some kicks for life. This is Uncle

01:14:10.630 --> 01:14:16.189
Rob's rules to dick pics. Rule number one. Type

01:14:16.189 --> 01:14:19.550
of a pic in someone else's name. So if you get

01:14:19.550 --> 01:14:24.869
busted, it's not yours. Rule number two. Shoot

01:14:24.869 --> 01:14:28.130
angles complementary to your length and girth.

01:14:29.210 --> 01:14:43.409
Rule number four. No propping of the leg. Next

01:14:43.409 --> 01:14:47.550
up, things we've heard in tell. Joe Buck and

01:14:47.550 --> 01:14:51.729
Corey Aikman are doing all televised and radio

01:14:51.729 --> 01:14:56.350
games of the NFL this year. Four out of five

01:14:56.350 --> 01:14:59.369
people surveyed said that TV douchebags and a

01:14:59.369 --> 01:15:01.949
microphone podcast are more entertaining than

01:15:01.949 --> 01:15:05.430
a gum infection. The fifth one called the cops,

01:15:05.510 --> 01:15:09.149
and we had to leave. Yes, it's true. Mark is

01:15:09.149 --> 01:15:12.100
an old bastard. It's also true that Mark uses

01:15:12.100 --> 01:15:15.420
a lot of ibuprofen. But Mark would like to tell

01:15:15.420 --> 01:15:19.260
you, if you see any pictures of him roofing ibuprofen,

01:15:19.340 --> 01:15:22.800
it's obviously fake, and you're to take the pictures

01:15:22.800 --> 01:15:28.640
and tear them up immediately. Strange, but true.

01:15:29.859 --> 01:15:32.359
Tico Cemetery is one of the cemeteries where

01:15:32.359 --> 01:15:35.000
the state of Ohio buried the residents of Columbus

01:15:35.000 --> 01:15:37.880
Mental Hospital. The gravestones are all the

01:15:37.880 --> 01:15:40.979
same size and shape. Many without names. The

01:15:40.979 --> 01:15:43.760
most striking feature is that there is some hipstones

01:15:43.760 --> 01:15:57.180
just marked specimens. Next time you take a dump,

01:15:57.300 --> 01:16:00.319
listen to two douchebags and a microphone. It's

01:16:00.319 --> 01:16:02.659
been proven in laboratory rats to relax your

01:16:02.659 --> 01:16:08.760
anal canal. Get in cover. Oh shit. What's that

01:16:08.760 --> 01:16:12.779
over there? Oh, no. It's the island of horrible

01:16:12.779 --> 01:16:21.380
jokes. Want to hear a joke about paper? It's

01:16:21.380 --> 01:16:40.270
terrible. It's a microphone, the Kansas City

01:16:40.270 --> 01:16:42.289
chapter here. I'm checking in with you. My name

01:16:42.289 --> 01:16:47.750
is Mark, and we are going to... Rob at the beautiful

01:16:47.750 --> 01:16:51.350
night farm of Lake of the Ozarks. Rob, you're

01:16:51.350 --> 01:16:53.350
talking about Z -Rock. I've got a story for you.

01:16:53.350 --> 01:16:55.770
I remembered while we were doing nothing here

01:16:55.770 --> 01:17:01.630
for a minute. Davey's old drummer in the band

01:17:01.630 --> 01:17:03.510
Savoir Faire that they had for quite a while,

01:17:03.609 --> 01:17:07.760
Tony, somehow he produced... Like a thousand

01:17:07.760 --> 01:17:12.300
Xerox stickers. He had them. Just had them. I

01:17:12.300 --> 01:17:14.899
forgot how he got them. He had like a thousand

01:17:14.899 --> 01:17:17.140
of them. I had this old Dodge Dart. I'd love

01:17:17.140 --> 01:17:20.000
to have one right now. I've got a couple somewhere

01:17:20.000 --> 01:17:23.979
around here. I'll find them. So, he had these

01:17:23.979 --> 01:17:26.340
thousand stickers. I had this old Dodge Dart,

01:17:26.579 --> 01:17:29.779
okay? And it wouldn't go in reverse. We called

01:17:29.779 --> 01:17:31.779
it the Fred Flintstone car. We'd all stick our

01:17:31.779 --> 01:17:35.569
foot out and push it, you know. We peppered that

01:17:35.569 --> 01:17:37.970
whole car with every fucking Xerox sticker. It

01:17:37.970 --> 01:17:42.609
took about a thousand. Except the windshields.

01:17:42.829 --> 01:17:50.310
That was a traveling non -reverse Dodge Dart

01:17:50.310 --> 01:17:54.670
Xerox machine. There you go. That's how much

01:17:54.670 --> 01:17:58.649
I love that station. Traveling billboard. Yes.

01:17:59.930 --> 01:18:03.529
Alright. Rob, I've been talking this whole fucking

01:18:03.529 --> 01:18:08.329
thing. Please. Alright, I got one for you here.

01:18:08.529 --> 01:18:13.989
Alright. Original Kiss drummer Peter Criss hasn't

01:18:13.989 --> 01:18:18.470
released a solo album since 2007, but that's

01:18:18.470 --> 01:18:23.569
apparently set to change later this year. The

01:18:23.569 --> 01:18:26.710
legendary beatkeeper announced plans to release

01:18:26.710 --> 01:18:30.579
a new hard -rocking solo record. In the fall

01:18:30.579 --> 01:18:35.819
of 2025, Chris unveiled details about the album

01:18:35.819 --> 01:18:41.020
in a recent YouTube video interview with Kiss

01:18:41.020 --> 01:18:48.979
Back podcast host Julian Gill and in a post on

01:18:48.979 --> 01:18:54.319
his own official website. In the clip, the 79

01:18:54.319 --> 01:18:56.960
-year -old rock and roll hall of famer says,

01:18:57.239 --> 01:19:00.100
I have an announcement. I have a new rock and

01:19:00.100 --> 01:19:06.899
roll album, the You Kiss Army Guys, coming out

01:19:06.899 --> 01:19:10.699
in the fall. And I really hope you like it, man.

01:19:11.020 --> 01:19:15.039
I think I'm going to love it. Huh? I think I'm

01:19:15.039 --> 01:19:17.079
going to love it because he's been doing jazz

01:19:17.079 --> 01:19:19.680
and swing music. He hasn't really been doing

01:19:19.680 --> 01:19:22.039
Kiss stuff. I think it's going to be great. But

01:19:22.039 --> 01:19:25.739
anyhow, go ahead. He's saying it's a rock and

01:19:25.739 --> 01:19:29.760
roll album. Exactly. And it says, I want to say

01:19:29.760 --> 01:19:33.699
God bless to each and every one of you. Jill

01:19:33.699 --> 01:19:38.340
then noted, now this is a hard rock, kick -ass

01:19:38.340 --> 01:19:43.920
album. It was co -produced by Barry Poynter,

01:19:44.020 --> 01:19:48.979
who's worked with Ozzy Osbourne, Marilyn Manson,

01:19:49.159 --> 01:19:54.899
Cinderella drummer Freddie Corey, and the auto

01:19:54.899 --> 01:19:59.239
guitarist Steve Stevens. Among others, and of

01:19:59.239 --> 01:20:03.359
course, current Motley Crue guitarist, John Five.

01:20:04.939 --> 01:20:07.560
That's a pretty good resume. What can I say?

01:20:07.760 --> 01:20:12.739
We had a ball. I think that's insanely cool.

01:20:12.859 --> 01:20:15.640
He's 79 years old. He's a cancer survivor, too.

01:20:15.720 --> 01:20:18.239
Did you know he had breast cancer? Yes, yes,

01:20:18.439 --> 01:20:21.920
yes. Yeah, 79 years old. He actually looks really

01:20:21.920 --> 01:20:24.399
good. I had no idea. I thought he was, like,

01:20:24.420 --> 01:20:27.800
lower 70s. 79 years old, and he's still making

01:20:27.800 --> 01:20:31.600
an album, and he's a cancer survivor. I love

01:20:31.600 --> 01:20:34.600
Peter Criss. Always have. So everybody later

01:20:34.600 --> 01:20:37.239
this year will be looking out for a new single

01:20:37.239 --> 01:20:41.079
by Peter Criss. Dude, I'm stoked. I cannot wait

01:20:41.079 --> 01:20:45.859
to hear this. So, fucking cool. I mean, yeah,

01:20:45.939 --> 01:20:49.600
he's behind, like, of course, Beth. But how about

01:20:49.600 --> 01:20:55.380
Hard Luck Woman? Dirty Living. Man, he's got

01:20:55.380 --> 01:20:58.859
that raspy voice that is so good. I can't wait.

01:20:59.319 --> 01:21:02.840
Can't wait. All right. That's awesome. And hopefully

01:21:02.840 --> 01:21:05.279
Ace comes out with another one. His last album,

01:21:05.380 --> 01:21:08.920
10 ,000 Volts, was fucking amazing. He worked

01:21:08.920 --> 01:21:11.600
with, what's his name? I forgot the guy's name

01:21:11.600 --> 01:21:14.000
from Trickster. Anyhow, they came out with a

01:21:14.000 --> 01:21:16.659
really solid album. Meanwhile, what are Paul

01:21:16.659 --> 01:21:20.529
and Gene doing? Anything to try to be relevant.

01:21:23.010 --> 01:21:27.069
I'm getting weighed. I know that. Oh, Gene? Oh,

01:21:27.109 --> 01:21:31.029
my God. Yeah. Gene needs to lug around his own

01:21:31.029 --> 01:21:34.130
fucking equipment. He does. Yeah, they're both

01:21:34.130 --> 01:21:38.069
gaining weight. Oh, Paul did, too? I thought

01:21:38.069 --> 01:21:41.750
he did. Didn't he? Oh, I didn't see any recent

01:21:41.750 --> 01:21:44.789
pictures. I thought he was beefing. I don't know.

01:21:44.789 --> 01:21:47.479
Maybe. I don't know. He probably did. I just

01:21:47.479 --> 01:21:50.079
haven't seen it. I know. I heard from him. So

01:21:50.079 --> 01:21:53.060
he's just lazy. No, you know what? You're right.

01:21:53.319 --> 01:21:59.140
Yep. So. Okay. Let me see here. I got something

01:21:59.140 --> 01:22:05.439
to dig into somewhere. Okay. I got one here.

01:22:06.180 --> 01:22:08.560
Hikers shocked to discover gold coins from the

01:22:08.560 --> 01:22:14.500
1800s. And they're worth a fortune. So. Stumbling

01:22:14.500 --> 01:22:16.640
upon loose change has never been so lucrative.

01:22:16.800 --> 01:22:20.140
A pair of hikers in Chesnia hit the jackpot after

01:22:20.140 --> 01:22:23.380
stumbling upon a cache of gold coins and jewels

01:22:23.380 --> 01:22:27.420
worth $300 ,000, which some historians speculate

01:22:27.420 --> 01:22:30.239
could have been purposely hidden from the Nazis.

01:22:30.300 --> 01:22:32.800
Because this is Chesnia, so that would be right

01:22:32.800 --> 01:22:36.399
in the area. So I think that's probably not a

01:22:36.399 --> 01:22:39.119
bad analysis of what's going on and why it was

01:22:39.119 --> 01:22:42.760
there. A pair of hikers in Chesnia found this.

01:22:43.159 --> 01:22:45.960
And one of the hikers said, when I opened it,

01:22:46.000 --> 01:22:50.680
my jaw dropped, said, Masolov Novak, Babelsnatch

01:22:50.680 --> 01:22:55.239
of Archaeology Museum of East Bohemia, where

01:22:55.239 --> 01:22:59.539
the treasure was assessed. The incredible find

01:22:59.539 --> 01:23:03.760
was revealed in a recent Facebook post. And the

01:23:03.760 --> 01:23:08.319
unnamed finders had been hiking in the Czech

01:23:08.319 --> 01:23:12.869
Republic's mountains. Earlier this year when

01:23:12.869 --> 01:23:16.989
they happened across a small aluminum can and

01:23:16.989 --> 01:23:20.829
an iron box. After peeping at the priceless contents,

01:23:21.130 --> 01:23:24.430
they brought it to Novak for evaluation. Inside

01:23:24.430 --> 01:23:28.529
the iron box was a horde of gold coins, 16 snuff

01:23:28.529 --> 01:23:33.170
boxes, 10 bracelets, a wire bag, a comb, a chain,

01:23:33.329 --> 01:23:38.380
and a powder compact. Meanwhile, he... The can

01:23:38.380 --> 01:23:42.300
harbored 598 gold coins, which were divided into

01:23:42.300 --> 01:23:46.180
11 columns, each wrapped in black cloth, said

01:23:46.180 --> 01:23:49.680
the archaeologist. The unearthed artifacts are

01:23:49.680 --> 01:23:53.500
unsurprisingly worth a pretty penny, millions

01:23:53.500 --> 01:23:56.720
of them. So they said they would need to analyze

01:23:56.720 --> 01:23:59.600
the rest, but at the current price of precious

01:23:59.600 --> 01:24:02.779
metals, the value of the find can start at $7

01:24:02.779 --> 01:24:08.140
.5 million, but only go up. estimated the archaeologist,

01:24:08.199 --> 01:24:16.140
Mr. Nowak. Wow. You talk about having a good

01:24:16.140 --> 01:24:23.279
day. Yeah. Jeez. And if you see the picture here,

01:24:23.359 --> 01:24:26.779
these gold coins are beautiful. I mean, they

01:24:26.779 --> 01:24:29.039
look relatively untouched since, you know, they

01:24:29.039 --> 01:24:33.979
were pretty much buried. Now, the gold flats

01:24:33.979 --> 01:24:36.359
that are in here, they don't look so good, but

01:24:36.359 --> 01:24:39.199
gold cleans really easy. But the coins are really

01:24:39.199 --> 01:24:43.420
shiny, and there's even some, like, it looks

01:24:43.420 --> 01:24:45.460
like hoop earrings, but I doubt if those are

01:24:45.460 --> 01:24:47.859
hoop earrings. They look like it, though. So

01:24:47.859 --> 01:24:49.720
if you get a chance, look this up. Interesting

01:24:49.720 --> 01:24:52.520
stuff is New York Post. Thank you, New York Post.

01:24:52.659 --> 01:24:58.159
They're the ones that posted this. So, all right,

01:24:58.159 --> 01:25:01.439
Rob, you got something? Yeah, I do. All right.

01:25:02.520 --> 01:25:35.720
I love this story. I love this story. from the

01:25:35.720 --> 01:25:39.699
county jail where he was on loan from the state

01:25:39.699 --> 01:25:45.159
prison due to a recent misdemeanor. Loach, who

01:25:45.159 --> 01:25:48.939
was convicted of murder in 1984, was granted

01:25:48.939 --> 01:25:53.600
parole in 2010. Clayton County Sheriff LeVon

01:25:53.600 --> 01:25:59.119
Allen told the TV station that jail went on lockdown

01:25:59.119 --> 01:26:02.659
as officers searched for him, but the next morning

01:26:02.659 --> 01:26:28.029
they realized know they get shit about that now

01:26:28.029 --> 01:26:31.069
from all the inmates. Hey, you're going to put

01:26:31.069 --> 01:26:33.090
us on lockdown today? Where'd you leave this?

01:26:33.229 --> 01:26:38.649
You leave a guy out in your car? What? Oh, my

01:26:38.649 --> 01:26:43.550
God. That's funny. Thank you, Rob. Well, Rob,

01:26:43.689 --> 01:26:46.390
you're the one that's working all the hours.

01:26:46.449 --> 01:26:48.930
It's near 930. Do you want to wrap this up or

01:26:48.930 --> 01:26:50.710
do you want to keep it going? It does not matter

01:26:50.710 --> 01:26:54.329
to me. I don't work tomorrow. You got something

01:26:54.329 --> 01:26:58.649
else? Yeah. Yeah, I do. If you got something

01:26:58.649 --> 01:27:00.789
I might be able to pull something up, then we'd

01:27:00.789 --> 01:27:04.750
probably call it. Okay. All right. You're more

01:27:04.750 --> 01:27:06.850
likely to develop an allergy. This is New York

01:27:06.850 --> 01:27:09.010
Post also, where I got this from. Thank you,

01:27:09.010 --> 01:27:10.909
New York Post, for coming up with some good shit

01:27:10.909 --> 01:27:15.590
for me. You usually do. You're more likely to

01:27:15.590 --> 01:27:17.869
develop an allergy to red meat if you live in

01:27:17.869 --> 01:27:23.270
the suburbs, and here's why. Suburban living

01:27:23.270 --> 01:27:27.609
has its upsides. Bigger homes, less noise, more

01:27:27.609 --> 01:27:31.449
natural green spaces, to name a few. Developments

01:27:31.449 --> 01:27:35.149
with grassy lawns and wooded parks draw families

01:27:35.149 --> 01:27:37.949
because they create a sense of relaxation and

01:27:37.949 --> 01:27:40.630
offer safe areas for children to explore and

01:27:40.630 --> 01:27:44.890
play, boosting physical and mental health. But

01:27:44.890 --> 01:27:47.750
some creepy, clingy intruders pose a threat to

01:27:47.750 --> 01:27:50.630
those serene settings by transmitting disease

01:27:50.630 --> 01:27:55.449
and even sparking an unusual to red meat. And

01:27:55.449 --> 01:27:57.770
Rob, you probably know this living in the country.

01:28:00.229 --> 01:28:05.829
Yeah. Certain ticks, does it make sense now,

01:28:05.949 --> 01:28:10.789
can trigger alpha gel syndrome, a possibly life

01:28:10.789 --> 01:28:13.250
-threatening allergy reaction to beef, pork,

01:28:13.329 --> 01:28:17.210
lamb, and other animal products. Scientists say

01:28:17.210 --> 01:28:19.510
the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

01:28:19.510 --> 01:28:22.130
say they have identified potential environmental

01:28:22.130 --> 01:28:27.569
drivers of AGS risk by mapping 462 confirmed

01:28:27.569 --> 01:28:30.750
cases in North Carolina, South Carolina, and

01:28:30.750 --> 01:28:33.770
Virginia. Since the first documented case in

01:28:33.770 --> 01:28:38.500
southeastern U .S. in 2009, Diagnoses of AGS

01:28:38.500 --> 01:28:42.199
have increased rapidly, with reported cases increasing

01:28:42.199 --> 01:28:48.300
from 24 in 2009 to over 34 ,000 in 2019, the

01:28:48.300 --> 01:28:51.840
researchers wrote last week at the Journal of

01:28:51.840 --> 01:28:56.619
Climates, whatever that is. AGS is the leading

01:28:56.619 --> 01:28:59.420
cause of adult -onset allergies in the U .S.,

01:28:59.420 --> 01:29:06.420
with test positivity rates at 30 .5%. Tick saliva

01:29:06.420 --> 01:29:10.279
contains alpha gel, a sugar molecule found in

01:29:10.279 --> 01:29:13.479
red meat. A tick bite introduces alpha gel into

01:29:13.479 --> 01:29:16.699
the bloodstream, tricking the immune system into

01:29:16.699 --> 01:29:20.140
thinking red meat is harmful. Systems which typically

01:29:20.140 --> 01:29:23.340
emerge two to six hours after eating meat include

01:29:23.340 --> 01:29:26.960
hives, nausea, wheezing, low blood pressure,

01:29:27.020 --> 01:29:31.560
and fatigue. Severe cases may lead to anaphylaxis.

01:29:32.039 --> 01:29:35.140
require immediate medical attention, and that

01:29:35.140 --> 01:29:37.680
will kill you if you don't get immediate attention

01:29:37.680 --> 01:29:41.380
if you go into any type of anaphylactic shock.

01:29:43.159 --> 01:29:45.500
The Lone Star Tick is the most common culprit

01:29:45.500 --> 01:29:49.039
for AGS. The deer ticks also have been implicated

01:29:49.039 --> 01:29:51.920
in this. Lone Star Ticks are primarily found

01:29:51.920 --> 01:29:54.039
in the southeastern, south -central, and mid

01:29:54.039 --> 01:29:56.500
-Atlantic regions of the U .S. They are especially

01:29:56.500 --> 01:29:59.640
abundant on Long Island, particularly in the

01:29:59.640 --> 01:30:04.100
suburb... Areas of Suffolk County. We really

01:30:04.100 --> 01:30:08.100
have to watch deer ticks down here. Yeah, deer

01:30:08.100 --> 01:30:10.239
ticks is what would give you that, but it's not

01:30:10.239 --> 01:30:14.399
as common in them. But this has been going on

01:30:14.399 --> 01:30:16.600
for a while, and I've actually heard of it way

01:30:16.600 --> 01:30:20.079
before 2017 or whatever the first ones that they

01:30:20.079 --> 01:30:24.960
figured out. I heard about this in the 80s, although

01:30:24.960 --> 01:30:29.279
it was very rare. But mainly that was country

01:30:29.279 --> 01:30:31.800
stuff right there. People in the city had no

01:30:31.800 --> 01:30:35.619
idea, but I guess suburbs actually have a high

01:30:35.619 --> 01:30:38.720
population of these type of ticks for some reason.

01:30:39.060 --> 01:30:42.239
So there's more, but you guys got what I'm saying,

01:30:42.359 --> 01:30:46.039
and Rob's got something, don't you? Yeah, I do.

01:30:46.260 --> 01:30:51.600
Okay. Actually, I'm actually going a little political

01:30:51.600 --> 01:30:56.680
here. That's cool to me. But it covers something

01:30:56.680 --> 01:31:03.529
that I've talked about before. Okay. I don't

01:31:03.529 --> 01:31:08.010
know if you recall a conversation we had on the

01:31:08.010 --> 01:31:15.010
air about we had a truckload of steel come in

01:31:15.010 --> 01:31:20.930
and the delivery driver had to use an app on

01:31:20.930 --> 01:31:23.949
his phone to communicate with me because he could

01:31:23.949 --> 01:31:27.729
not speak English. Yes. Do you remember that?

01:31:28.029 --> 01:31:37.560
Yes. I know, I know. Go ahead. Yeah, you've already

01:31:37.560 --> 01:31:40.079
heard. Actually, probably a lot of people have

01:31:40.079 --> 01:31:42.180
already heard, but I've got to mention it because

01:31:42.180 --> 01:31:47.060
I ran across this. Well, Rob, you're... I'm the

01:31:47.060 --> 01:31:50.220
guy that has to unload them and sign the paperwork

01:31:50.220 --> 01:31:53.760
and talk to them. You see, Rob, that's the first

01:31:53.760 --> 01:31:56.220
thing I thought when I read about the introduction

01:31:56.220 --> 01:31:59.880
of the spill. You're the first person I thought

01:31:59.880 --> 01:32:01.220
of because you're the one that tipped me off

01:32:01.220 --> 01:32:03.140
to that. I had no idea it was a problem, but

01:32:03.140 --> 01:32:07.819
go ahead. Yeah. The Commercial Vehicle Safety

01:32:07.819 --> 01:32:11.739
Alliance announced major action on English language

01:32:11.739 --> 01:32:16.180
proficiency for truck drivers in compliance with

01:32:16.180 --> 01:32:20.760
directions from the White House. The CVSA announced

01:32:20.760 --> 01:32:26.140
that starting on June 25, 2025, noncompliance

01:32:26.140 --> 01:32:30.680
with existing federal regulations requiring commercial

01:32:30.680 --> 01:32:34.770
vehicle operators to be proficient And English

01:32:34.770 --> 01:32:41.090
is an out -of -service violation. This move by

01:32:41.090 --> 01:32:44.930
the CBSA comes just days after President Trump

01:32:44.930 --> 01:32:50.270
signed an executive order targeting several trucking

01:32:50.270 --> 01:32:54.949
industry issues, including a call for tightened

01:32:54.949 --> 01:32:59.350
English language proficiency requirements for

01:32:59.350 --> 01:33:05.010
commercial vehicle drivers. called for reversal

01:33:05.010 --> 01:33:09.829
on the 2016 memo that directed law enforcement

01:33:09.829 --> 01:33:13.489
not to place truck drivers out of service for

01:33:13.489 --> 01:33:19.770
ELP violations. The CBSA Board of Directors voted

01:33:19.770 --> 01:33:26.609
to add an English Proficiency, U .S. only, heading

01:33:26.609 --> 01:33:30.050
to the Part 1 driver section of the North American

01:33:30.050 --> 01:33:33.109
Standard Out -of -Service Breakthrough. Anyway,

01:33:33.329 --> 01:33:40.050
what it boils down to is if a truck driver gets

01:33:40.050 --> 01:33:45.069
pulled over and an officer feels like he cannot

01:33:45.069 --> 01:33:49.989
understand English enough, because, I mean, if

01:33:49.989 --> 01:33:54.489
you think about it, and I've read other articles

01:33:54.489 --> 01:33:58.210
about this, and I totally agree. These truck

01:33:58.210 --> 01:34:03.779
drivers that cannot understand English, How the

01:34:03.779 --> 01:34:10.619
hell are they reading the road signs? Oh, shit.

01:34:10.859 --> 01:34:15.579
Shit like that. They're going to cause an accident.

01:34:15.739 --> 01:34:18.060
They're going to kill people. Yeah, you can feel

01:34:18.060 --> 01:34:20.880
however you want about immigration. That's not

01:34:20.880 --> 01:34:23.479
the issue here. It's nothing about immigration.

01:34:24.180 --> 01:34:27.260
It's just that if you're going to be here and

01:34:27.260 --> 01:34:32.920
drive our trucks or do anything... Speak our

01:34:32.920 --> 01:34:36.579
language. Understand our language. Come here

01:34:36.579 --> 01:34:41.739
legally. Please. There you go. Look, Rob is saying

01:34:41.739 --> 01:34:44.939
this. Rob's saying... I was not going into the

01:34:44.939 --> 01:34:48.899
immigration shit. Now that you bring it, yeah.

01:34:49.460 --> 01:34:53.060
I was bringing up the point that, hey, these

01:34:53.060 --> 01:34:56.279
truck drivers, if you can't speak English, how

01:34:56.279 --> 01:35:00.920
can you read the road signs? Yeah. Oh, I agree.

01:35:01.760 --> 01:35:06.020
with them shutting these people down. And also,

01:35:06.100 --> 01:35:08.939
another thing to point out is... And it's given

01:35:08.939 --> 01:35:14.539
us Americans more jobs. Here's what I'd like

01:35:14.539 --> 01:35:17.319
to point out. No, that's fine, Rob. You have

01:35:17.319 --> 01:35:19.319
a right to your opinion, and thank you for expressing

01:35:19.319 --> 01:35:23.520
it. Me, I remain mum on this stuff because I

01:35:23.520 --> 01:35:26.439
told myself from day one I wasn't going to get

01:35:26.439 --> 01:35:29.960
political. I have my strong feelings about all

01:35:29.960 --> 01:35:33.060
of that. But this isn't for me on this show.

01:35:33.720 --> 01:35:36.680
Rob, it's fine. It's fine. You have a right to

01:35:36.680 --> 01:35:40.600
your opinion. I had mentioned at one point about

01:35:40.600 --> 01:35:44.039
a truck driver that couldn't speak English. And

01:35:44.039 --> 01:35:48.260
then this story come up. It fit. I had to go

01:35:48.260 --> 01:35:53.279
with it, man. Yeah. And I agree. And also, another

01:35:53.279 --> 01:35:58.560
thing is... How can I accept something if you

01:35:58.560 --> 01:36:01.810
cannot... Tell me what you're giving me. Yeah.

01:36:01.970 --> 01:36:06.010
And I'm representing my company. And it's my

01:36:06.010 --> 01:36:09.750
name on it. You know? No, I agree with you. And

01:36:09.750 --> 01:36:12.369
here's something else to think about, Rob. Okay.

01:36:12.810 --> 01:36:15.829
They also, as a truck driver, you have to fill

01:36:15.829 --> 01:36:20.649
out these logs. How do you do that? You have

01:36:20.649 --> 01:36:23.729
to explain how many hours you were on the road

01:36:23.729 --> 01:36:27.770
because you can't go over a certain amount. Then

01:36:27.770 --> 01:36:30.390
there's laws about how much weight you can have

01:36:30.390 --> 01:36:33.430
in the truck, people that you can have in the

01:36:33.430 --> 01:36:37.329
truck, drivers. You know, there's all these different

01:36:37.329 --> 01:36:41.390
things that you have to do, these logistics.

01:36:41.569 --> 01:36:43.949
I see where you're going there. Yeah. So therefore,

01:36:44.229 --> 01:36:48.869
you have to be able to write English. Yes. Yeah,

01:36:48.970 --> 01:36:52.289
I see where you're going. Yeah, to me, it makes

01:36:52.289 --> 01:36:54.949
perfectly good sense. If it doesn't to you, okay,

01:36:55.189 --> 01:36:58.189
that's fine. We don't argue politics on this

01:36:58.189 --> 01:37:00.170
program because we're all adults and we know

01:37:00.170 --> 01:37:03.529
how we feel. And Rob, I appreciate what you said

01:37:03.529 --> 01:37:10.310
and thank you. So it is... That's very seldom

01:37:10.310 --> 01:37:13.229
I bring something like that up, but that is something

01:37:13.229 --> 01:37:15.250
that I've mentioned. When I read that, Bill,

01:37:15.430 --> 01:37:40.229
I thought of you. Yeah. Yeah. That drives me

01:37:40.229 --> 01:37:47.989
nuts. Yeah. No, you're right. The thing is, is

01:37:47.989 --> 01:37:50.689
you have to spell your name, too. You have to

01:37:50.689 --> 01:37:52.750
print your name and write cursive. Do you think

01:37:52.750 --> 01:37:56.189
that's because younger generation can't read

01:37:56.189 --> 01:37:58.250
cursive? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Well,

01:37:58.329 --> 01:38:02.649
that's what I'm saying. And now they've done

01:38:02.649 --> 01:38:06.630
away with teaching cursive. So on the paperwork,

01:38:06.869 --> 01:38:11.409
you still have to sign cursive and print. Well,

01:38:11.869 --> 01:38:14.149
how are you going to do that if you were not

01:38:14.149 --> 01:38:19.220
taught? That's true. You see what I mean? Yeah,

01:38:19.239 --> 01:38:22.399
that's true. It's like somebody that dropped

01:38:22.399 --> 01:38:26.520
out of school in sixth grade or whatever, you

01:38:26.520 --> 01:38:31.760
know? Yeah. Yeah, I agree. On the Hill Jack or

01:38:31.760 --> 01:38:36.039
whatever, you know? Okay, you're saying it too

01:38:36.039 --> 01:38:42.989
now. It's fine. It's lovingly. People know us,

01:38:43.149 --> 01:38:45.470
and they know we're joking around. You can call

01:38:45.470 --> 01:38:47.510
me Hill Jack. I grew up in the sticks. You do

01:38:47.510 --> 01:38:50.569
know what I mean. I'm a bonafide half and half.

01:38:50.609 --> 01:38:53.069
I grew up half my life in the inner city, and

01:38:53.069 --> 01:38:56.750
then the other half in the sticks. So I can say

01:38:56.750 --> 01:38:59.770
that. Me too. And then part of it over in the

01:38:59.770 --> 01:39:03.409
Mediterranean. I love it. It's a lot quieter.

01:39:03.949 --> 01:39:06.829
Yep. I can't argue with you. All right. Shall

01:39:06.829 --> 01:39:10.510
we go ahead and shut this bitch down? Yeah, I'm

01:39:10.510 --> 01:39:14.050
done. Alrighty. Everybody, thank you for listening,

01:39:14.130 --> 01:39:17.109
and go fuck yourself. That's what I always say

01:39:17.109 --> 01:39:19.250
on the other program. No, goodnight, assholes.

01:39:20.810 --> 01:39:31.550
Goodnight, assholes. Oh, no. Looks like the show's

01:39:31.550 --> 01:39:35.149
over, kids. Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't

01:39:35.149 --> 01:39:38.600
afford a wireless mic. Fear not, assholes. They'll

01:39:38.600 --> 01:39:40.439
be back invading your ear holes soon.