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whereabouts. And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.
Man, I sure wish I was the garbage man. You know what I could do if I was the garbage
man? I could go to the wrong parts of town on the wrong days periodically in the morning
and then watch everybody run out of their house in their underwear with two bags of trash
screaming stop halt. Yeah, that's what I'd love to do.
These guys are inviting as a used hypodermic needle.
Two douchebags and a microphone operating from Kansas City, Missouri, the heart of America.
This is southern tip of... Cass County? No, no, no, Jackson County. What the hell am I
saying? I used to live in Cass County. We're the southern tip of Jackson County, but we're
still in Kansas City and Rob is... Hey, I am Rob. I am at Campton, Missouri,
Lake of the Ozarks in Camden County. That's right. Yep. Very beautiful area there.
About a half hours away. Yep.
Oh yeah, especially on days like this. It was beautiful down here.
Oh gosh. Oh, it was excellent here too. Yeah, as soon as I got off work, I like to sit outside
for a while. I just couldn't, you know, it's like I had stuff to do in here because I was trying to
get some stuff together for the sports bastards, but I couldn't move. I'm like, this is too damn
nice. I just sat there. But I got in... I didn't hear boats going down the lake today.
Oh, I bet. I bet. I bet people are tuning them up and getting ready for the season. And who
is it, man? Been one hell of a winter, hasn't it?
Oh, we had a one... we had a... you guys can come find out, we had a huge fishing ton last week
down here. How did that go?
Some guy won. I don't know. I didn't read... Oh, they froze their nuts off.
That was a bad... I don't know. Yeah. Good for them.
Yeah, that's what I was going to say too. Good for them. If that's what you can do, do it.
I'm sitting here in the bunker nice and warm.
That's right. That is Rob Rad's bunker in Camptotown, Missouri.
It is stock full of dry goods.
Let's see, all different kinds of stuff. He is ready for an apocalypse. Rob Rad is...
he don't care. He says, bring it on. Nuclear, whatever. He doesn't give a shit. He's ready.
So, all right.
That's right. He even has his... he has a suit. He has a suit that he puts on
that is anti... what would you call it?
Nuclear? Well, radiation won't go through it, right?
Yeah? All right. Okay. Maybe not. All right. The big news here in Kansas City is
long time, 98.9, the Rock Morning Show host slash star, Johnny Dare, was laid off
with a shit ton of other employees nationwide at Odyssey Radio.
It was kind of a weird deal.
Yeah, you know, it sucks because they picked him off because he's making good money.
Why is he making good money? Because he is a ratings getter of people by his
advertisement. He's very good. He's one of the best in the country. I mean, I don't
know, you know, how much national recognition he gets, but he should get a lot.
But anyhow, I thought that George Soros bought all the debt and was going to own
it. But I heard different now. I heard that it was blocked in court. So they have
their old owners who are bankrupt is what I think happened. So, you know, I'm not
sure who did this massive round of cuts, but this is sad news. After 32 years of
solid radio and exceptional rating books, no more. His last day was March 7th.
They did let him say goodbye, which is rare, rare in radio. Usually they cut you
after your last show. They're like, oh, by the way, this is your last show. What?
Well, let me get back. No, there's the door. I still stand by my prediction, though,
Rob. Now it's a couple of years old. Johnny Dare will end up at 101 The Fox.
Yes, we talked about that the other night. Yeah. You you text me and let me know it
was going to happen. But unfortunately, I can't pick up 98. They have an online
first thing I thought of was how we've been talking about. So you, Johnny, would
end up at 101 The Fox and now is his opportunity. Well, I mean, I'm sure
there's going to be a no compete probably for the rest of the year. And who
knows? It depends on how much they want to pay to keep them away from their
ratings, you know, keep them away from killing them. You know, when he goes to
101 The Fox, the show will be different. I'm not sure if Greg will be with him,
but I'm still predicting that Johnny will be at the Fox. I especially predict
this if the Rock stays in an active rock format situation because cumulus in
Kansas City is about the only corporate conglomerate that still has
personalities behind the mic. They will pay for personalities. They picked off
the old K.Y. guys, you know, they got Skid Rowdy. I'm sure he couldn't been too
cheap. You know, they got slacker got rest his soul. You know, they got Doug
Medlock over there. You know, they went after they actually went after
personalities and paid a little bit for him, where everyone else is slashing
personalities. They're not doing it. They got Chuck nasty at nights. He is not
retired. I heard him last night. Right. So I think you're thinking of Skid Rowdy
Skid Rowdy retired. So but anyhow, so anyhow, they still are into the old
formula of they believe that if you have personalities that you're going to have
people tuning in and I agree with that 100%. So now I go to this again. This is
why we're here doing what we've been doing for three plus years now. We're
primitive. We know we aren't always the most polished. We don't have a stunt guy
giving out stickers. We have no budget at all. But we still believe in the old
format. The delivery is internet based, you know, and and that's what it is. But
this is a way everything is going. The new delivery is internet based. Like I
said, with fan supported shows. Bubba Love Sponge is a great example. He jumped
on the visual internet bandwagon years ago and is doing well. Bubba is a great
story in particular. I'm a fan and I listen to the show whenever I get a chance.
He built a huge part of his following on Sirius XM and terrestrial radio. So he
already had a huge following. And he went to Twitch at first. He already had a
rabid fan base that would support his show. His show is on multiple platforms
now. And he built a large audience just by being on visual formats like Twitch
and Rumble and YouTube. And what it is is people that like this show throw money
at him and say, you know what, I want this thing to stay on. And they even do
clever things like they have a bar party. It's a Bubba Army Royal Radio
Royalty party. A Bubba Army Royalty party. Barp. And that's where everybody gets
a ring. It's kind of like a Super Bowl ring. You go there and fucking hobnob
with Bubba and his gang there. You drink, you eat, and everybody gets to say hi
to each other. And I think they even sometimes put him on the show, you know.
So, you know, he has the capabilities of going live on his network. He has this
network called Bubba One. And it is on TuneIn. It's on its own entity, its own
app, it's on YouTube, it's on everything. So he has the ability to get on there
and do whatever he wants. He has the ability to say what, well, right now he
doesn't because he still has three or four terrestrial stations. But once
they're gone, he could move to mid days. He could say fuck, shit, piss like we
can anytime. And it is the new way of doing business. You know, you may never
see Bubba's name ever again on the Hot 100 anymore. And that's like, and I think
Inside Radio does the Hot 100 of the radio personalities once a year, right?
And it like in March or something. About right now they put him out. And that's
like the biggest names that they think is the biggest names, the biggest sellers,
the movers and shakers, you know, all that. So, but he's not on the, he won't
be on the Top 100 Radio Online anymore, but he will be. He's doing better than
95% of the other morning shows. He's making a good living off of this. And he
doesn't have any worries about someone coming in and cutting him. I mean, if his
three terrestrial affiliates cut him, number one, he's not going to lose out on
very much money. And number two, that gives him the freedom to do whatever he
wants. So I'm sure in the back of his mind, everyone else is, yeah, we like being
on in Florida. You know, it's our home state. People love us here. Yeah, he grew
up with us and all that, but there's gotta be something in the back of his head
saying, you know what, if they cut me, I could do whatever the hell I want. I can
do it when I want. And, and there's like no boundaries, at least right now for
the internet. But this is the way that radio is going. It's this right here,
only visual. And people support it. And that's the way it's going. Radio sucks
anymore as we know it. Terrestrial radio with a corporate conglomerate. But,
but I have to give cum, cumulus props. They are still doing it the old fashioned
way. So anyhow, we get that. Let's get back to regular radio, Rob. I predicted
Laszlo in the afternoon would be the first casualty, right? Right. I guess I
missed that one, didn't I? Yeah, you did. You know, I can tell you this. If the
Rock thinks it's going to replace Stare with Laszlo, that experiment will not
last too long. That experiment will last one ratings trend, not even a book. And
the, and I'll tell you what, that show does not compete. And Johnny Dare has
rabid fans like Bubba the Love Sponge does. People, I mean. Is he going to take
listeners with him? Yeah. Oh God, yeah. Yeah. He'll take every one of them with
him when he goes to 101. Yeah. Yeah. When he, when the non competes up and you see
all of a sudden, you know, Hey, I'm back or whatever, you know, when one on one
gets him like they got everyone else that they needed, you know, let's face it,
they probably would got Max Tana at Moffat if they were, if they didn't retire.
I mean, yeah, they picked off everybody from the old KY. They got all the talent
and they put it down there. Skid Rowdy dominated afternoons for years at KY.
And then he did it again at one on one, the Fox till he retired, I think last
year or it could have been the year before. I don't know. It was either last
year or the year before he retired. So anyhow, I know that Laszlo doesn't
command nearly as much money, but sometimes you get what you pay for. Right,
Rob? Right. Yeah. So we can verify that. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. That's how
come the show's free. You get what you pay for. That's right. So, um, you know,
we don't even ask for handouts, man. I mean, we could, you know, go, Hey, man,
show us a couple of bucks on fucking Venmo or something. Come on, man. You
know, we're poor, we're poor bastards. Now I gotta, I gotta keep my neon signs
going somehow. Right. Send in a chunk of change. What the fuck? Anyhow, at least
maybe I could buy some Gatorade Zero powder or something. Right. Anyhow, yeah,
yeah. Tonel Clippers. God knows I need them. Okay. I just can't imagine an active
Rock radio station format without a morning show, but they have an afternoon
hot talk driven show. Could you imagine that? Isn't that like anti everything
we've ever known? They're going to have an afternoon hot talk show, but no
morning show. Yeah. Um, we'll see how well this works. And look, the people that
did this, they don't care how it works. They're looking at it as we have to get
rid of money because we don't have any. And, and you could, if you'd heard Johnny's
last show, he's not bitter. He's not mad. He said he didn't think his show was
going to last one year, you know? And, and it was, he, he was like incredibly
really honest, which I've always loved about the guy. And he said, you know, he
goes, I have nothing to offer and to do that for 32 years, you know, is really
something else. But I beg to differ. I mean, the guy is very talented and he's
extremely intelligent. Anyone that listens to him knows he is, you know, this
long hair guy that, you know, likes to drink and party and stuff. Yeah. But
behind there is substance. He's a real person and he cares about people and
he's a dynamite guy. And I'm glad he's a Kansas city guy because he's one of
those guys that you could point to and go that guy right there. He's from Kansas
city. That's right. That's what we do here. You see what he does. This is what
we do here. We give a shit about people. We love people and we stick together. So
Johnny has been the epitome of that and he's going to move on. You know, it's too
bad that he couldn't finish out his career at the rock. You know, that's so
rare anymore, but you know what? He'll probably finish it out at one on one, the
Fox. So anyhow, I'm all for it. I'm all for it, man. I, I want them to crush the
competition and look, and Johnny has a lot of friends over there. Maybe you can
tap into him when he's over there at the Fox, you know? So I know Johnny's kind of
in a, he's probably in a very weird spot where you're like, you know, I'd like to
get back on there and crush him. And he's probably not like this at all. I'm
probably completely wrong. He's probably like, oh, whatever. But he has a lot of
friends over there and he doesn't want to see them get, you know, thrown out. So
but anyhow, you know, we wish Johnny the best. I can still remember when he
signed on the rock after grueling months at Young Country. The station that took
out your old dial position AM 1030 Z Rock hired you for their mornings when the
very boring guy you carried for a bit named Trent Tree Top Tyler. I remember
him well. I fucking hated him. He was such a boring son of a bitch, man. And
when they brought Johnny on board, I'm like, Johnny's great. Who's this other
fucking asshole? I could not wait till he left. And then I think he went to New
York. He thought he was going to take on Stern and he got fucking paddled. He got
send a run and I think he's like in Arkansas or something somebody said in
some small fucking market. That's where you look, man. I don't like motherfucking
people. But man, I think I was horrible. And, and every time Johnny'd say something
funny, he'd follow it up with something stupid. I remember it well. And I'm like,
they can, they got to get him another morning host. They have got to do this.
And they did, you know, he received a female co host after that and it was off
to the races. 32 years, not bad, Mr. Dare. We certainly hope to hear your raspy
friendly voice again soon. Rob, you got anything you want to add? I met him back
when he was on Sea Rock. Yeah. We were hanging out on Nolan Road and there was a
poor audio show and this was back like eight, eighty-nine. He's a cool dude. He
was really good friends at a time with Mike. Yeah, he kept in touch a little bit.
Last time I've seen him, you know, buddy, he went to Joshua's one night. He was
there. Joshua's. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. That's the one who grabbed you right off
the highway, right? And I ended up buying some lingerie. Didn't even have a
girlfriend. That's a good salesman. Come on, man. I gave him to the model, man. I
gave him to the model trying to get her to go out with me and shit. No, didn't
happen. Didn't work, huh? Hey, I got this brand new. That's a good salesman. Last
time I've seen Johnny, we had a good night that night. He was pretty good that
night. He was really good friends with Davey for a while and I got to know him
somewhat there and he was always nice, always pleasant, always just, always just
Johnny. So he will land on his feet. I hope he has some fun until then. You know,
go to the Virgin Islands and fucking drink Pina Coladas or whatever. Go scuba
diving. I think he likes to do that. Go have some fun, Johnny. You fucking
deserve it. Just go to vacation and come back and get with it. Yeah, all these
years you had to fucking wake up that early. Go enjoy a little bit of time on
your own, you know, on yourself, your self time and have some fun because
you'll be back in radio before you know it and we all can't wait to hear you. And
I hope Greg and everybody's with him but the Fox seems to like get the one
talent and then nobody else. You know what I mean? They don't like higher gangs of
people like, well, this is my board guy and this is my writer and you know, they
seem to go, well, no, no, no, we just want Skidrody. That's it. Nobody else. We
just want him. Bring him over here. You know, what about Slacker? What about the
rest that morning? No, no, no. We just want Slacker. That's it. Bring him over
here. You see, that's kind of the way they do things and I expect them to keep
doing that and that's the way they keep costs under control, I believe. And
that's how come they're still a very successful radio station operating. As far
as I know, they seem to be. They don't seem to lack in sponsors, that's for
sure. And also, I mean, they have great ratings. I mean, their ratings are
usually number two in the market consistently and that's really not
indicative of a classic rock station. You know, classic rock stations usually are
down there in a three share, not an eight share. They're always down there
because let's face it, man, I, you know, a lot of people can't even fucking hear.
They like that music. You like me. I'm lucky I can hear it anymore. You know, I
got tinnitus so bad. By the way, I'm still doing that experiment of what they
told me to do. I still have five more weeks because someone wrote me. It takes
six weeks to do this, what they told me to do to get rid of the tinnitus. So I
got five more weeks and five more weeks I'll report back to you, okay? It's not
like a three or four day deal. So anyhow, Rob, I don't know where else to take
that. I mean, we all agree, Johnny's a great dude and he'll be back. He'll be
back on some dial position and he'll be as successful as ever. That's just the way
it is. Somebody will pick him up for sure. Oh yeah, yeah. How could you not? I'm
pretty sure he got four or five calls right now, but I'm pretty sure they
always do this. No compete. They don't want you to jump right out of the back
kicking their ass. They want people to forget about you. They want to put you on
the back burner for a year or two and have people forget about you and hopefully
they can get the hot new thing there or whatever, you know? But no, no, not dare.
Believe me, people are going to wait around for him and they will jump back on
once he gets a new dial position. Oh, by the way, while we're speaking of Odyssey,
whoever turned our show into them and we're on their podcast, thank you. I don't
know how it happened. You know how your phone listens to you? You know, and then
like right now I could go rustic furniture. So tomorrow I'll get 10 ads
saying rustic furniture. Well, we're talking about Odyssey. We're talking about
Johnny Dare. We're talking about podcasts in my phone. I go over there and get
ready to go to Google and what pops up to douchebags and microphone on Odyssey's
podcast site. And I was like, wow. Yeah. And you call me right back. What dude?
I'm like, yeah, yeah. We have no idea how they got there, but whoever you are and
whoever put us on that Kansas City lot live website to thank you. This is a good
dude. Yeah. Yeah. This is good. I had no idea. Odyssey had podcast section.
They're a big conglomerate, at least for now. So thank you. Whoever did that. I
know I didn't. I know Tover didn't. I know you didn't. So however they got there,
we thank you. So anyhow, Rob, you got something you want to go into. You want to
keep talking about this, whatever you want. The floor is yours. All right. Last
week at wildfire at Myrtle Beach for over 2059 acres. Wow. And lives and homes of
hundreds. Now a 40 year old man named Carmine Ragusa has been arrested in
connection with the wildfire. Hey, you think he's Italian? I'm guessing. Just a
hunch. Anyhow, go ahead. He is being accused of igniting a fire at his home.
That fire allegedly led to the wildfire as we're using it did not possess the
necessary precautions to prevent the spread. According to a South Carolina
Forestry Commission press release, several witness reported saying where
do they denying a fire in his backyard fire pit on March 1st said fire pit was
close to a tree line at Covington Lake subdivision. The fire spread to the tree
line and for the release, Ragusa didn't have appropriate water source readily
available. Moreover, he didn't have any garden tools on hand to control the
fire. Thus allowing the fire to spread to land owned by Walker Woods HOA. Mmm. So
got some homes. Wow. Oh yeah, he spread the housing association. Rob, hang on,
hang on. Listen to this. That's an RC Cola Meg. Mmm. Go ahead. Mmm. Delicious.
You're such a taunter. I know. It's looking at me right now. It just winked
at me. I'm just saying come on guys, if you're going to start a fire, make sure you
got the caution. Yes, absolutely. Mr. Ragusa, come on now. Wow. Okay. Well,
that's an unfortunate deal. So yeah. Okay. Let's come right back with some emails.
Sound good? Sounds good. Alrighty. Be right back. Oh man, what the fuck is this?
Is this a new feature? What's inside Mark's head? Sounds stupid to me. Why do
people say tuna fish sandwich when nobody says chicken bird sandwich? Once
again, it's time for Ramblings of a Madman. I believe Congress needs to synchronize
cat dance for 20 minutes before each session. That needs to happen. Our
constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from an alien.
Real hilarity. May, your five-year-old neighbor have told me about your lessons.
Two of those bags of broken phone in an effort to keep everything fresh. We offer
you first world problems. Damn it. I can't decide between nachos, chili, or
wings for the game tonight. This is bullshit. I should not have to make
decisions like this. Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser. Can you take
me to the hospital? I just broke my leg falling for you. And now, deep thoughts
with Mark. Sure wish my inner voice sounded just like Morgan Freeman. That'd
be cool. Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from
an alien. Real hilarity. May is useful as a pilot with pulse. Harambe used to
listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and Cheek Radio Shack realistic tape
recorder. Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheek
Radio Shack realistic tape recorder anymore. You might ask why Harambe never
listens to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheek Radio Shack realistic
tape recorder. Well, it's because Harambe is dead. Senselessly murdered because
some idiot did not watch her child properly while looking on her phone.
Sadly, Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and the Cheek
Radio Shack realistic tape recorder or any other show anymore. Sorry Harambe.
I'm going to do douchebags on a microphone on a beautiful evening here in the Kansas
City vicinity in a Mark. And I am Rob at beautiful Lake of the Ozarks. It's a little
bit more beautiful down there I'd have to admit. Yeah, it's a little. Alright.
Let's do some emails, Rob. Sounds good. Yeah, I mean, they're the best segment.
Let's face it. These people are much smarter than we are. So we might as well
just go to what they're saying. Well, there's a couple of them, maybe not. But
okay. We want Knoblick. Becky. St. Joe. That's funny. Isn't Becky code for
Knoblick? I don't know. I don't think so. And that song, the urban song, Becky.
I want some Becky. You know what? Doesn't matter. Yeah, you're going to get
Knoblick. We're still doing research, right? Yeah. Knoblick is our new town.
Montrose is out. Montrose is being notified and they're not happy. They're
hurting, as you'll see. Douchebags, you guys are ditching us at our time and
need. We here in Montrose are heartbroken over this. We hope Johnny Dare does a
podcast and destroys you guys. Mitch in Henry County. Yeah, yeah. If he does a
podcast, hell yeah, he'll destroy us. Yeah. Mitch, like that. Mitch. Mitch. Mitch.
He must have a winter home in Henry County, right? He's got homes everywhere,
I think. Mitch, we hope he has a podcast too, then we can all listen to it. Where
the hell was he? Where was he last time? Yeah. Oh, oh, shit. Cass County. Cass
County, yeah. He likes getting a little. The difference between likes and
bouts. He gets a little zinger in and takes off. Yeah, he does. He's a
terrorist. I mean, he just like fucking darts, gets in, takes off. He's like
annoyed. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, we wish Dare would do a podcast too. He won't
steal any of our advertisers. We don't have any. So there you go. All right. Hey
guys, you know of any other morning shows that are worthy? I mean, we listen
to you guys obviously, but there's a void without Dare from 6 to 10 a.m. now. I
know probably not local, but maybe internet or podcast-wise. Lenny and Aubrey.
Aubrey is a little township over there south of Stillwell or right around the
Stillwell area, I believe. Aubrey township. Anyhow, doesn't matter. Lenny,
I've always said I'm above the Love Sponge Band. 5 to 9 a.m. with after
shows dependent on the day. Facebook, YouTube, Rumble, TuneIn, and there's a
lot of other entities you can go on. I can't even think of it, but that's the
only really show I listen to anymore with any regular, you know, all the
talent's gone to regular radio pretty much. So you know, I'll listen to Chuck
Nasty. Last night I listened to Chuck Nasty and he was on point.
That was going to be my suggestion. If you're looking for radio, I would go with
101 the Fox. Yeah, they still have talent there. They still have...
There is no case. I mean, they got old KY, they got everybody. Come on.
Yeah, yeah, so I would suggest tuning into the Rock, or not the Rock, the Fox,
and see what happens. So I think there's at least a couple of shows that you like.
Doug Metlock, he's kind of mellow. You know, he's older now. I don't know how
old he is, but he's older. But he still does some neat stuff, like he plays a
tune on his guitar that you guess. But the whole gimmick is this right here.
Whenever he plays on the guitar, the very next song, he plays that. He plays that
song. I've heard him do it three times now. And I'm like, wait a minute. So
anyhow, sorry, someone's going to win now. All right. I was making the next one.
I was making ice cream out of the last show. No, I just realized my ice cream
tastes like piss. What do you think's going on there?
Raji in Laurel Heights. Throw some sweetener on it, Raji. It'll be fine.
Make sure and save some for your family, your wife and kids. Okay? Very important.
Okay. You got to be a good guy. Yeah, throw a little Splenda or sugar or
whatever you prefer. You like corn syrup? Go buy some corn syrup. Throw the shit
on there. But it's fine. Yellow Snow is not a problem. It's probably just
old. It's a day old snow, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just a day old snow.
It's nothing to worry about, Raji. Have fun. Well, Mark, Lazlo Outlasted Deer,
your dumb shit prediction was wrong. You have the IQ of a paperclip. No argument
there. Jeff. Okay, Jeff. Nobody's seen this, Jeff. No. And here's what I got to
say, Jeff, right here. I can tell you why. Corporate radio does not look at
success or talent. They only look at paychecks. The world I was looking at was
a corporate functioning, a corporation that's functioning well and not
hemorrhaging money. You know, I think we've all been a victim of this, you
know, downsizing. Oh, man. Yeah, fuck, man. Things are going bad. We just lost this
big contract. Die, blah, fucking blah and all that. Well, here's another case of
that, okay? They're not looking at why people tune in. They're not looking at
how good the person is. They're not looking at any of that. They're looking at
paychecks. And the fact is, is Lazlo makes a hell of a lot less. I would say on
the surface, the way it looks, since he's still there and there is not, is, you
know, Lazlo doesn't make as much money, so Dare got cut. Anyhow, the rock is
toast. We know this. All right. Mark, see if Dare does voiceovers. Denny in
Overland Park. Too much talent. I'm pretty sure he will not be doing voiceovers.
We did not afford him. I love it. He gets canned and like half of the emails are
behind him. I know. All right. Hey, that Cracky story was awesome. Hard to
believe a crack addict eats better than hardworking citizens. Ross. It's true.
That was not embellished or nothing. No, that is the truth. Crackheads eat better
than we do. So all right. Let's see. Okay. And finally, where did you get the Tony
Iommi mug you spoke about? Jimbo in Rich Hill. I wonder if this is a Jimbo I
know. I don't remember. I bet you go online and find 30 of them right now.
There's people everywhere that make these specialty mugs. I can't tell you how
much I paid for it. Nothing. All I know is I got it online somewhere. So I wish I
could tell you more. Just look around. You'll find it. Anyhow, Rob, we turn to
you. All right. A Southwest Airlines flight from Houston to Phoenix was forced
to return to the gate at three passengers, took naked and began screaming
before takeoff on Monday afternoon. Nice. Video taken by a passenger shows the
woman completely undressed, walking up and down the aisle while yelling. Did you
get pictures? Is she hot? I got it blurred out. Oh, okay. It's blurred out
down. Okay. A tough. The flight from Hobby Airport in Houston was delayed for
over an hour, according to NBC affiliate KPN ads and Phoenix. The Houston Police
Department said in a statement that NBC News on Thursday received a call about
3 30 p.m. Central time Monday that a pastor took off the clothes I quite and
was causing a disturbance. Woman was removed from the flight and transported
to the near Neuro psychiatric center at Harris Health in Tom hospital in Houston
for medical evaluation. There have been no charges filed, so her name has not
been released. Southwest Airlines released a statement on Thursday saying
that local law enforcement at 7 30 flight 7 37 after return the gate due to
customer situation on board, our teams have received reach out to customers
on board the flight to apologize for the delay for their travels. Well, I mean,
what can you do? So when strips down and does crazy shit, you can't fly. No. Wow.
It seems like more and more people are doing that. They're really acting up on
flights. This has been going on for years now, and it's like really coming to
a head at that with all the flights have been having problems, you know. Yeah, so
all right. A lot of crazy shit there. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Um, you know what? I don't
know what I blame it on. Uh, maybe preservative. I don't know. Who knows? Um,
okay. Well, they took her straight to the psychiatric hospital. Hopefully they
kept her there. So that's that's one of the problems right there is they can't
keep anybody anymore. If someone's fucking crackers and crayons, they end
up letting them out. You know, I mean, they don't have enough space or whatever.
So, uh, okay. Thank you, Rob. Um, I was going to go into this last podcast, but
I didn't. I called bullshit instead. Okay. Um, anyhow, I drove this fucking
Instagram guy nuts. I fucked with him relentlessly until he blocked me. It
took him about a year and a half to block me, but he eventually did. Um, he
was a little slow to it, I guess, you know. So anyhow, I was blocked from this
dude's Instagram account. It was something like Mikey the cat guy. Well,
or something close. I just saw he tried to kill himself and he's in a mental
institution. Speaking of mental institutions. Okay. Um, I think some of my
shenanigans might have added to it, might have been piling on. I didn't know
that was going on. I would left him alone. So Mikey the cat guy, if you hear
me, I'm sorry, but here, here's what happened. Um, well, you got me blocked
anyhow. So, okay. For probably a year, I relentlessly terrorized this guy. I saw
it first that he would answer all my comments and have rage over the
negative ones. Not ones I did. Someone else did. I mean, he would get so mad. I
mean, he just like fucking splurred out shit and stuff. So one day he had 10
pictures of the same cat. So I started with what's the other cat's name? He had
the name of the cat on the posting. He replied, there's only one cat. So the
next day I reply, are both the cats yours? He replied back. That is the same
cat. So I answered back and said, oh, okay. That one picture is in the sunlight.
It made it look like a different color. I think I asked if he is mad at me or
something. He said no. So anyhow, I wait a little bit. A few weeks later he
posts a couple of kittens playing. I then reply, are they siblings? He
replied no. I then asked if they were both his cats. He replied yes. I then
asked if he had a favorite one. He said no. So I stopped for a couple of weeks
and he puts up a picture of another cat. I asked if he owned the cat. He said yes.
I replied, what do you feed him or her? He said dry food, Purina. I asked if the
cat got cold if he had a little cat sweater for it. He said he doesn't take
cats out when it's cold. I asked him if he wanted to know my favorite cat of his.
He said no. So I keep badgering him like this. Okay, just, you know, just little
things, right? Just stupid questions. So I'll leave him alone again for a few
weeks. I wait until he posts again. He started posting a picture of a lost cat
and then I asked him where the cat could be found at. He replied I'm not sure.
It's a cat's, it's a friend's cat. I reply what's your friend's name? He
replied it's on the flyer. I asked if he ever met the cat. He replied no. So I
kept doing shit like that over and over to him, okay? Just constantly like, so is
that cat playful? Does that, is that cat missing any teeth? Does it like dogs? I
mean just badgering him with his shit all the time. I kept brutal, it was so bad
that people were like fucking liking, liking it constantly. I kept brutalizing
this guy but one day I pushed it too far. I asked him if he ever took a shower
with his cats. He blocked me finally. I was about ready to give up. I didn't know
what else to do. So anyhow, I think I might have helped him go nuts so, so I
would like to apologize right now on this podcast. Mikey the cat guy or whatever
the fuck your name was, I'm very sorry. I did not mean to pile on. I didn't know
you were doing that, that badly. So anyhow, Mikey I hope you get out and post
many more pictures of cats and everybody leaves you alone. So alright, should we
take our second break? Sounds good. Alrighty. And Mikey if you're listening,
I'm sorry because we know they play two douchebags and microphone in all the
mental institutions right? They have to to keep the same. Yeah that's right.
Give us a big hug. Come on, come on Mikey. Come on. No, no, no, no. Close. Come
on. No, no, come on. Alright you little scamp. Get on out of here. Alright we'll
be right back.
The apocalypse just happened. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to
go. But we can tell you what you can eat.
Okay it's post-apocalypse and you're walking down the barren wasteland that
used to be a city. You find an old can of beans lying in the middle of the road
but you do not have a can opener. What you do then is you find a patch of
concrete, you rub the top of the can for five minutes, then you go to the middle
of the can and squeeze it and it should pop right open.
Hey there fuckstick. You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives
a shit about. Bumblebees have been proven to sing to their young.
Jam X. What the hell happened? You were the generation of change.
You never wanted to be one of them. At the feet. Spoke for you.
Hunk the man. Hunk the system. What the hell happened?
The generation of angst. The generation of non-compliance.
Is now buying a boat. You're really fed up until someone dangled a dollar near you.
Great job Xers. Everything's ruined.
Two Dish Bags and Microphone is the only podcast available anywhere with Gusto.
That's right I said Gusto. Gusto is a magical ingredient in Schlitzbeer that makes it so damn delicious.
So enjoy a little Gusto from your podcast today.
Everybody knows Mark is a fucking idiot but Mark would like to take this moment to remind you.
You're listening to this fucking idiot.
You watched the news. It was grim. Is it apocalypse? Inevitable?
We suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand and have multiple mobile chargers.
We have the most of the most.
Make sure and have plenty of rope. Strong threaded durable rope with a rating of 400 pounds or greater.
You need to know basic knots so you can go to the library and download the Boy Scouts handbook.
And have a reference to slip knots and other essential rope tricks.
Rope can be used in traps to catch food or would be predators.
Rope is a key ingredient in post apocalypse survival.
Have you ever wondered where something came from? Have you ever looked at something and said,
Hey I wonder what the origin of that is? Well so have we. That's why we give you The Origin of...
The Origin of Lysol.
Lysol first came to prominence after it was used in Hamburg, Germany to help combat cholera epidemic in the late 19th century.
It was later touted as a way to fight the devastating flu epidemic of 1918.
An ad in the Los Angeles Times that year said, Help your health board conquer Spanish influenza by disinfecting your home.
Two douchebags and microphone and I'm Mark here in the Kansas City vicinity.
And I'm up at Lake of the Ozarks.
Alright, Rob at Lake of the Ozarks. You got something for us?
Yeah I do.
Alright.
Actually I had this story but things changed.
Okay.
Reed Piglets used his props at an art exhibition in which they were supposed to start the death were stolen from their makeshift gallery in a former butcher shop.
I was going to report on this the other day.
Okay.
Now they've been stolen.
Hmm.
Animal rights activists railed against the showcase by provocative Chilean artist Marco Eversati who was attempting to make a point about animal rights in Denmark.
But he had to cut his Copenhagen show called And Now You Care short after the piglets encased by two shopping colleagues were stolen.
The pigs were given only water and were expected to live for about five days before succumbing to starvation.
They were supposed to show what they faced in Danish farms where their mothers are overbred meaning they are more offspring than teats.
Eversati said that when the gallery's face was being cleaned Saturday an animal rights group visited.
With the pigs being taken shortly afterwards.
Police are in a case that there have been no charges yet.
They closed the unlocked door while the cleaning people were cleaning the toilet.
The artist said after four minutes they came out and it was no pigs.
Shut down the exhibition duty saying it no longer had soul.
No thank you.
I thought I thought this exhibition was bullshit.
Like I said I've been reading this for like a week or two. They had these three piglets in the gallery.
Starving them showing them and they were in Copenhagen.
And now that they're stolen it just gives up.
Okay.
Definitely.
Mitch in South Cass County is what the last Mitch he used before this one.
I found the email over here.
Hey Mitch keep them coming.
Alright.
Convinced you always have BO it could be this little known syndrome.
Some people frequently worry about their body odor.
I just covered up with a fart don't you.
People don't know your mistake if you're gassy they just figure it's all gas.
You know for all they know you took a shower you smell great.
Alright sometimes it gets so bad that they they perceive other people's gestures such as sniffing touching their nose.
Or opening a window as confirmation that they stink.
Even worse they miss work skip a fun event or socially withdraw because of it.
Wow.
All that. Sorry I just opened up a mystery cigar.
And it's a little strong. That's what kind of coffin.
It's good but it's a little a little stronger than I thought it was going to be.
Where the fuck was I. Okay.
All factory reference syndrome is what is called ORS.
It's a little known psychiatric condition where patients are preoccupied with unfounded belief that they emit terrible body odor causing them anxiety embarrassment and severe distress.
People with ORS may engage in excessive hygiene practices to dispel the image.
Imaginary odor and sorry to dispel the imaginary odor and when the belief that they smell persists recede into avoidant behavior.
So firstly wash the hell out of themselves constantly and then they just don't come out because they think they still stink no matter how much they scrubbed.
Luckily new research provides hope for the treatment.
University of Montreal PhD candidate Morgane Masse published a paper in the fall describing two cases of the condition.
The first patient was a 63 year old man who struggled ORS since 20.
So he's 63 so 43 years he struggled with it.
When symptoms typically appear he claimed to have had a nauseating odor and unpleasant sensation in his mouth.
He was still able to maintain romantic relationships and a social life but avoid he avoided public transit and events.
He didn't miss anything there.
That's for sure.
And the rest is fucking article here.
I'm sorry that cigar just threw me off.
I don't think I like it now.
The second page and a 53 year old man had a much more severe case.
One that led him to a completely socially withdraw and left him unable to hold a job.
He also experienced hallucinations and thoughts of suicide.
Wow.
I wonder if he's in the same place that Mike is at.
Oh too soon.
Too soon.
Okay.
Sorry.
He believed a poop smell emanated from his mouth and rest.
I'm sorry.
Massie recently noted that one of the challenges of ORS is that it's difficult to diagnose when the patient is convinced the body odor is real.
People know or as have often gone from doctor to doctor before being referred to psychiatry.
Massie said last week they will consult numerous specialists, dentists, dermatologists to try to eliminate the odors they believe they admit.
She pointed out that the two patients in her study spent years seeing various doctors and trying drug therapies before receiving an accurate diagnosis.
It's unclear how many people have ORS.
Addressing it typically involves a combination of psychotherapy and medication.
So it's kind of hard to know they have it because they usually don't speak about it because they're embarrassed is basically what I'm saying.
Congenitve behavioral therapy, CBT, has been effective in helping individuals challenge and reframe their disordered beliefs about body odor.
Additionally, certain antidepressants have shown promise in reducing obsessive concerns associated with ORS.
So ORS sounds like not a good thing to have.
I mean it won't kill you.
It won't make you ill, but it will make you do things that you know like stay in the house.
Like stay in the house or constantly wash yourself.
Now, yeah, that sucks.
Yeah, I just thought it was funny.
He thought a poop-like odor was coming out of his mouth and wrecked him.
Both sides.
I thought it was funny.
But that's me.
Rob?
Yep, yep, Peter.
Rob, go ahead.
Hey, a Michigan taxidermist transporting a stuffed giraffe in the back of his truck on a busy road of wrong motorists who spotted the exotic animal's long neck nearly hunched over in the vehicle's bed.
It reminds me of the Hangover 3. Have you ever seen that?
Yeah, I have.
Yeah, remember when the giraffe gets decapitated?
Yeah.
Okay. All right, go ahead. Sorry.
The creatures of the creature went viral and sparked concern with many questioning if the animal was real, criticizing anyone who would hunt a giraffe and joking that the African hook mammal was the toy or ass mascot.
My buddy was on his way home from work and saw what appears to be a real deceased giraffe in the bed of someone's truck.
The initial poster wrote on Facebook on February 27.
The public clamor resulted in Aaron Weiner, a taxidermist and big game runner, setting the record straight.
Weiner, who works at St. Clair Flats, Africa, said he was commissioned by an unnamed museum of reserve and now the giraffe, which died naturally of old age.
Are you okay?
Yeah, he was just transported down the road. People saw it.
Okay.
Well, I mean, yeah, it probably does catch your eye. You think you see a giraffe in someone's car, so I get it.
All right. Let's see here. Let me go through some stuff here.
I got something here.
All right. I bought a knowingly a dairy free cookie biscotti from Costco.
It's called Cookie Street twice baked cookies.
It's a cherry chip, almond biscotti hybrid.
I would never thought is a non dairy cookie, but I tell you what, it is so freaking good.
It's one of the best cookies I've had in my life.
I'm telling you, go get one of these if you get a chance.
They're better than most regular cookies, and they don't have any lactose in them.
I got to get Tofer a bag of them because he has lactose intolerant pretty bad, and I think he would really enjoy these.
But I just had them.
You know, I just had them just there, you know, just they look good.
And I was like, oh, no, actually, I think they had them as a sample.
I tried. I was like, man, that shit is good.
And then when I got home, I realized they're a non dairy cookie.
And I was like, wow. So if you spot them, get them.
You'll thank me unless, of course, you're diabetic and you have your big toe cut off because the cookies, you know, then I recommend you not get them.
But other than that, I get them.
All right, Rob, do you have a dick radar?
No.
You know, it's the ability to spot a dickhead at first sight before he says a word.
You don't have that?
You can't look at someone and go, oh, man, that dude's a dick.
OK. OK.
All right. Well, my dick spidey sense is spot on anymore.
The more I deal with dickheads, the more natural it is to me.
I got to where I can spot them way down the road.
As soon as they start walking up, I'm like, that guy's a dickhead.
And I'm just wondering if you had it, too.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I was pondering a bunch of shit.
I also have another thought, Rob.
I think a man's brain has three compartments, right?
OK, now stay with me here. All right.
A man's brain has three compartments, a back burner that stores possible bullshit headed towards you,
a sift through compartment that allows one to sift through the bullshit to see it clearly,
and a deal with bullshit head on compartment for immediate action.
Do you think that's correct?
I think that was a good thought, right? Yeah.
Yeah. But the only caveat to this is football season.
The first two compartments are full up with football,
so you kind of like lose a little bit of that sense, you know, that sense during football season.
You know, because you're worried about trades and standings and all this stuff,
how many sacks and how many yards per play and all that stuff.
So anyhow, you know, I was just thinking about that the other day and talking about it with a friend,
and we both agreed. Yeah.
Three compartments to a man's brain, and that's it right there.
So anyhow, Rob, we're going to you.
All right. I guess I'll go into this one.
All right. And this is a local.
Okay. Actually, I found it on destination in Missouri.
Okay.
Hidden in Wink Creek, it's an unassuming treasure where Missouri's culinary heart beats strongest.
A place where Roast Beef isn't just a ninja item,
but a religious experience was crossing the country lines, county lines for it.
Which Wink Creek is like this place we're talking about, like 10 minutes from it.
It's right here.
That's the one with the Tesla, right?
Yeah.
Yeah. I remember. I remember the name. Okay.
There's something beautifully honest about a restaurant that doesn't need fancy marketing or charity gimmicks to draw a crowd.
In fact, sometimes the most memorable dining experience happens in the places you've reached in the past.
Those humble establishments cut the way on quiet streets that locals protect like family secrets.
Okay. It was restaurant in Wink Creek, Missouri. That's exactly that kind of place. It's not trying to win any architectural words with its modest space exterior and simple green lines.
Sorry, my mute came out, Alvin.
No, that's all right. It's hard to ruin this podcast.
Yeah. Anyway, they're talking about talking, they're also trying to get me on.
Okay.
Let's see. All right.
A man was rescued from the bottom of a 40 foot pipe. He says he has no idea how he got there.
Okay. The pipe was only about a foot wide, officials said.
A man who was rescued from the bottom of a narrow 40 foot pipe in Portland, Oregon, said he has no clue how he got stuck there for hours, officials said.
Portland Fire and Rescue crews responded to a report of a person stuck in a hole after people in a nearby building heard a man screaming for help, KPTV reported.
When responders arrived at the scene, they heard a man yelling from the bottom of the bottom foot of a 40 foot deep ventilation pipe from a nearby parking garage.
The pipe was only about a foot wide, officials said. The man told responders that he woke up in the hole and has no idea how he wound up there.
Portland Fire and Rescue said.
The man who only suffered minor injuries was taken to a local hospital for evaluation. He must have been a skinny fucking guy, huh?
Had to have been really skinny. A foot wide pipe and he was stuck in there and he has no idea how he got there. He woke up there.
I mean, that sounds to me like there's some drugs involved before.
What do you think?
Some hallucinogenics or something? I don't know.
I just don't think you just wake up in a foot wide pipe.
Hey Rob, you got something?
Yeah, give me a second here.
Right there.
Uh.
What do I have here?
You want me to go into something?
Yeah, go into something.
Okay.
Oreo has come out with a foot long cookie.
The Oreo foot long cookie was made available for purchase at Subway restaurants nationwide on Thursday.
More than a year after the foot long size cookie concept was first introduced.
The chocolate chip cookie foot long became a permanent menu item shortly after its launch, a Subway spokesperson told USA Today on Thursday.
More than 13 million foot long cookies have been sold since December 2023 rollout.
According to a Subway press release, Subway struggled to keep up with the unprecedented demand for its $5 dessert.
It didn't allow customers to order them online as a result.
In addition to the Oreo foot long has been the creation of the foot long belt extender available in snack aisles at Dollar General's store.
Anyhow, Rob, have you noticed that Dollar General's are like the redneck Starbucks?
Yeah, they are.
Yeah. There's one on every gravel road intersection.
You know, Walmart's kind of been getting off the hook, don't you think?
I mean, they used to be like made fun of. Now it's Dollar General.
Oh yeah, Dollar General is a lot worse. We have one out by my work, over at my store.
Oh, but they're all over the place in the country. God, going to Eureka Springs.
I can understand people coming into town. I have to go all the way to town to get to the office. They're all over the place.
Yeah. Yep, I mean, they must do well. I never see one going under.
So, oh, and their shopping carts are so small. They look like toy shopping carts are so small. Have you noticed that?
Yep.
Yep, they're all yellow and really small. So, anyhow, Rob, you got something you want to go into?
Yeah, I do.
All right.
A classic fishing trip turned desert with three New Zealand men and a dolphin weighing more than 900 pounds
appeared to fall out of the sky before crash landing in their small boat.
No one was badly hurt when the 11-foot, bottle-nosed dolphin jumped aboard the open top boat Friday,
said Dean Harrison, the owner of the nearly 16-foot vessel.
The 11-foot dolphin jumped into a 16-foot boat.
Wow.
Harrison and two companions were fishing near the hole in the rock, a picturesque spot off the far north coast of New Zealand's North Island.
Well, dolphins crawled up ahead. The men saw a shadow across the bright summer sun and heard an almighty boom before they also pulled.
This one decided to jump on board and say, hello, Harrison said.
In one minute, everything was fine, and then just like that, lightning struck.
There was a big dolphin in our boat thrashing around and breaking everything.
The creature was flailing, snapped every single fishing rod we had on the boat, and severely damaged the bow as the trio clung to the sides of the vessel, said Harrison.
One man had minor injuries to his arm where the juvenile male dolphin grazed his back and shoulder, but all three fishermen and the dolphin were otherwise uninjured.
Hmm.
That's pretty cool.
That is cool. Very cool.
All right, we went from one animal story to another.
Zoo goers are appalled as dogs painted to look like tigers and ridiculous gimmick.
This was a rough sell.
They wrote that, not me.
A zoo in China is under scrutiny after allegedly dying two dogs black and orange to look like tigers.
According to video footage on the bite dance owned app, Duvin, the Chinese version of TikTok,
Chow Chows are enclosed in wooden pens and painted bright orange with black stripes.
The Daily Mail reported the animals at the Quizu Bay Forest Animal Kingdom barely resemble the fierce feline and viewers online were not so easily duped.
Isn't that just a dog?
One person commented, they definitely don't dare to bathe their dogs for fear of discoloration.
Someone else.
What if it rains?
A big tiger with doglike temper, another one said.
The zoo located in Tazou later confessed to local media outlets that the animals were died as a gimmick, but assured that there were no health risks to the dogs.
It was a native Chow Chow died into a tiger dog, not a tiger, the zoo explained, per the Mirror.
So I guess one could die a Raiders jersey red and gold and they could call it a winner.
Just just thought.
All right, I think we're onto something. Get some red and gold spray paint. Got something Rob?
I've got a bunch of little stories here, so I'm sorry.
I've got a long eagerness. Honestly, my news ain't been what the shit lately.
Okay.
We don't know the political, so.
Yeah, that's true.
A lot of my ideas.
Oh my God, everything's fucking political right now. Can't get away from it.
Well, do you want to wrap this bitch up then?
Actually, let's do that tomorrow.
All right.
Everybody, thank you for listening. Have a good night and go fuck yourself.
Night assholes.
I was just joking, guys. I want you to go fuck yourself. I want you to keep downloading.
Oh, no, looks like the show's over kids. Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.
Fear not, assholes. They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.