And now it's time for...
The Daily Deucebag Pledge.
Here at Two Deucebags in a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.
Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.
Not like all those other guys, we can and will lie if it makes the story better.
Two Deucebags and a Microphone.
We Talk.
Jesus.
Strange, but true.
In the 1920s, there was a health drink called Rattathor that literally contained radium and consequentially slowly killed its customers.
Evan Byers, a wealthy American socialite, died from Rattathor radium poisoning in 1932.
When his body was exhumed in 1965 for study, his remains were still highly radioactive.
The only reason Rattathor didn't cause a public health crisis at the time was because it could only be afforded by the rich.
Jam X.
What the hell happened?
You were the generation of change.
You never wanted to be one of them.
At the feet.
Spoke for you.
Hunk the man.
Hunk the system.
What the hell happened?
The generation of angst.
The generation of noncompliance.
Is now buying a boat.
You're really fed up until someone dangled a dollar near you.
Great job, Xers.
Everything's ruined.
Hi there.
This is your ears.
Why are you listening to this garbage?
I thought we were friends.
Swimming in toxic masculinity and wiping their ass with politically correct washrags.
Two douchebags in a microphone invade your ear holes in 3...2...1...
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.
Let's see.
If I identify as a dog and I start wandering around the block without a collar on, could animal control come by and pick me up?
I may never know.
Greetings all from the very southern tip of Kansas City, Missouri.
2.4 million men, children, and everybody.
Metroplex of Kansas City, Missouri and Kansas.
This is Mark of Two Douchebags in a Microphone and I'm speaking to...
This is Rob from Kanditon, Missouri.
Population roughly 5,000.
Part of Lake of the Ozarks.
Yes, and it's a very beautiful part of Lake of the Ozarks.
I love that arm of the lake.
Is that the Niangua River part?
Yeah, we're closer to the Niangua.
And the Ha Ha Tonka State Park isn't very far from me.
Yeah, Ha Ha Tonka is so beautiful.
If you ever get a chance, just look up images.
It's Ha Ha Tonka like you would think it would be spelled.
It is a Native American name.
It's kind of an odd name to us because it's not something that we say or whatever.
So anyhow, it's called Ha Ha Tonka, Missouri State Park.
And look it out.
It is gorgeous, isn't it?
Oh yes.
One of the main parts of it, one of the main spectacles I guess you call it, there is an old fort up on a hill that caught fire and burned.
And the ruins are still there and you can go right up to it and look at it.
And it's a beautiful scenery.
It's got a lot of waterfalls, waterfalls.
And there's quite a few hiking trails.
Yeah, and there's a lot of natural springs.
It is a gorgeous piece of area.
Missouri does not get enough credit for places like that.
I mean everyone knows Arkansas and they know other places, you know, but Missouri has some of the most beautiful landscape.
Well, we were talking about that a while back.
When people think of Missouri, they think of either St. Louis or Kansas City.
There's a lot more to Missouri and I live in the heart of it.
Yes.
I love it.
There's a reason that the Lake of the Ozark, and actually it's more than that.
Lake of the Ozark is the one with the name because that's a big party place.
There's Truman Reservoir, there is Pauwetti Tarr, there is Table Rock, Taney Como.
I mean there's a lot of them I'm forgetting about.
I mean just not enough to...
Bull Shoals.
Bull Shoals, great one.
Yeah, great fishing lake.
Yeah, they're great fishing lake and they're beautiful lakes too.
A lot of them are spring fed in a lot of areas like Table Rock is spring fed in a lot of areas.
It's a beautiful lake.
I mean all of them are.
Just some of them are a little bit more scenic than others.
I'm telling you, just look up Ha Ha Tonka and if you get a chance,
I'll bet you you'll want to go visit it after you look at it if you're not familiar already.
If you're an outdoors type person, you will love this kind of place.
Yes.
Yep.
Yeah.
Anyhow, I have some time off starting Monday.
I have like five days off in a row.
I took a little bit of leave and just kind of refresh and relax and kind of recharge the batteries.
Reboot?
Yeah, reboot.
Yeah, that's a good way to put it Rob. Reboot.
Got to reboot, turn myself off and on, whatever, reset.
I was entertaining the idea of maybe hitting Eureka Springs for a couple of days.
Well, it appears that the shitty weather is about everywhere except the deep south.
But they even get it periodically there too.
I mean, case in point like we talked about yesterday, New Orleans get nine and a half inches of snow.
So, you know, I guess the whole deal is I'm just going to have to deal with this cold bullshit
and just like podcast and do stuff like this to entertain myself, you know.
I mean, I can't really go anywhere in this stuff.
I mean, it's colder than shit.
I mean, it is freaking cold and it's going to get colder too.
I mean, we're going to have some sub-zero temperatures again.
Yes, we are.
This is a typical winter in the 70s, late 70s, early 80s as I remember, you know, when I was just a little bitty turd.
You know, the extreme cold temperatures, the prolonged temperatures and the snow that lasts more than three or four days.
The snow that lasts for a couple of weeks, the snowpack.
We didn't get nearly as much snow as they predicted.
But I mean, we got about three inches, which is enough.
But I mean, you know.
Yeah, we were about two inches.
Yeah, I saw some pictures.
But it pretty much snowed all day.
Pretty much.
It did here too.
It was crazy.
Pissed and, you know, just kind of spit and pissed.
But I mean, you know, three inches is not bad at all around here.
I mean, it's pretty tame.
You know, Topher and I were going to go hit up the city market.
But when it's 10 degrees, number one, there won't be anyone there.
Number two, it's around 25 degree in the commons area where we'd be recording.
So everything we do has to be indoors.
You know, so the only good thing about snow and cold is probably hot coffee and chocolate, right?
Yeah.
So Rob, I want to change directions here.
How was your cake last night?
It was good.
Good.
Very good.
Good. Good to hear.
Good to hear.
What flavor was it?
It was chocolate with like white buttercream frost.
That sounds pretty righteous.
So good. Good, good, good. Good to hear.
Anyhow, so far this morning, like I said, it only snowed about three inches.
I don't understand why the hell there's so many traffic issues.
The snow was light powdery snow around here and it didn't stick at all.
We deal with this every year.
I mean, it's like people are in like, I don't know, like in a bubble.
And all of a sudden, it's like every time it snows, we go through this.
You know, people lived here for years.
All of a sudden it's like, oh, I forgot.
You know, I forgot I have to be careful in this stuff.
I forgot I can't slam on my brakes.
I'm glad I didn't have to work today, but man, there was traffic issues everywhere.
Freeway shut down.
I just couldn't believe it.
It was nothing bad at all.
I mean, this is just pretty mundane for a snowstorm, you know.
So I don't know.
You know, we deal with it every year.
You think sooner or later people would get used to it, right?
Yeah.
So, you know, I used to say, well, you know what, we're used to it here and, you know,
and we wouldn't be freaked out by snow.
But now I'm kind of wondering.
I think, you know, I don't know.
People just have like two short of attention span.
I don't know.
Or they just don't.
I don't know.
Who knows?
But oh, by the way, Rob, did you realize we have to rerecord life tips from Uncle Rob?
No.
We missed tip number three.
It's not on there.
Okay, yeah, yeah, I caught that.
I caught that.
Yeah.
I was like, where the hell is tip number three?
I don't know what we were doing.
I'm like, I had to rewind it.
And I'm like, or, you know, or push it back.
And I'm like, we did not say tip number three.
It went straight to four.
And I'm like, I don't know what the hell happened.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That was the big fix.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, it's easily correctable, so we'll do that.
I don't know.
Yeah, we will do that.
Yeah, so anyhow, but until then, I'm just going to run that one.
Everyone can wonder what three is, you know, until we get back in there.
So, but okay, anyhow, back to the Eureka trip that could have been, but it's not going to
be because the weather's almost as shitty as up here.
I'm anxious to try out my portable podcast equipment, you know.
And the best place to do this would be Eureka Springs, because it's just three and a half
hour drive.
It's in the car, you know, because I don't want to, I want to try it out before lugging
it all the way on a cruise, because the ultimate thing is I want to record one on the cruise,
you know.
And I think that would be the ultimate cool to sit out on the private balcony and record
one.
And, you know, you hear the sounds of the cruise ship, the boat honking, you know, the
waves crashing and all that stuff.
I think it would be great to do that.
You know, Topher and I did that one time.
I called in from the cruise, from the, from the balcony, and it turned out pretty well.
And the way you do that is you have to call the other person on, on the internet, and
it works really well.
It works so much better than I thought it would.
So, anyhow, I checked in on a tablet that was a small tablet and a small mic, but I
haven't been finding, I can't find a tablet that's strong enough to, to run the software
that's needed, and also to produce any type of a good sound out of the mic.
So, you know, maybe I'm just missing it, but it may be a little while off before they come
up with this tablet, or maybe they're not even worried about it.
Maybe I could be one of three people in the whole world that wants one for that.
I don't know.
So, anyhow, we'll see.
I don't know.
There's, to be honest, there are a lot of people pop-casting these days.
Yeah, oh, I know there is.
There's a lot of them.
A lot of people.
I was thinking, there's a way to do it on your cell phone, but, you know, here's the
deal.
You can do a practice run and all that, but I don't want to record for an hour and a half
and not be able to load it onto my computer, you know what I mean, to process it.
Right.
And to put it up on RSS.
Right.
So, I'm kind of leery about that.
I might try it one time, like I'll just call you up, I'll go down, like, the City Market
with me and my cell phone and a personal mic that, they make mics that attach with a app.
I'm thinking about doing something like that, and then I would have to find the right equipment
or the right software, because Adacity doesn't work well with any type of a cell phone, and
that's what I use right now, unless there's something out there that I don't know about,
because I know people do podcasts with their cell phone.
So, that might be a possibility too, but like I said, I would have to go down to, like,
the City Market or a park or something and do a podcast with you for about an hour and
a half and then come back and load it onto the computer and see if it works.
So, anyhow, but all that's a little ways off.
We'll see, you know, the cruise is in late April that we're going to go to this year.
So, you know, I got a little time to hopefully figure it out.
So, anyhow, yesterday evening, remember I was running a little bit late?
Yes.
Okay.
Well, we just got back from Val's sister's house.
We had to pick up Val's nephew from KCI.
He is in from San Diego and take him to her sister's house.
And anyhow, her sister doesn't like driving in traffic, and it was rush hour, so we said,
we'll go get him.
So, I have to take a second here to give the new airport props.
Most airports put the cell phone lot right in front, right next to the arrivals, you know,
where all the planes, you know, all the people getting off the planes are coming out and
people are there to get them.
Well, the new KCI, it's well away from the buildings, but it's within two minutes to
the arrival buildings.
So, you can be two minutes away, but you can be way away from the building because most
airports put it right next to their arrivals, and it's a huge cluster to get in and out
of that lot.
Right.
Yeah.
You know what I'm talking about.
They're all coming out of there, and the people are coming from the picking up somebody and
then getting ready to accelerate and get out of there.
And then here you are coming out.
Yeah, you got people going all different directions.
Yeah, and it's just a big cluster.
Yeah.
And so, I got to give them props.
They thought about this, and they put the cell lot not too far away, but far away enough
to where it will not interfere with people coming out of baggage claim and their rides
are there going, hey, Aunt Jeffy, or not Jeffy, whatever, Aunt Freida.
Aunt Freida, okay, you're over on B1.
Okay, I'll be right there, Aunt Freida, you know.
So, anyhow, but last night we went to dinner at Slaps because it was close to where Val's
sister lives.
And it stands for Squeal Like a Pig.
This is an American Royal winner that started their own barbecue joint.
This place out, it started out tiny.
I hadn't been there in a while, but it grew into a large restaurant.
It is a fantastic place if you're ever in Kansas City.
I would recommend that as one of the top barbecue joints right now.
It is really, really good.
And they're not paying me anything to say this.
They didn't give me a cut on the meal or nothing like that.
I didn't even talk to them about it.
I'm just telling you, as a favor, if you're around Slaps or you want good barbecue in
Kansas City, you might check them out.
The ribs, they did something a little bit different.
They basted the ribs while they were cooking them, you know, while they were smoking them.
And they were tender, but then after they give the rib, they take the ribs after they've
been basted with barbecue sauce a few times and they've been smoked, they put, they covered
in a sweet rub that is just out of this world.
So you get the sweet rub, then you get the barbecue sauce, and then you get the rib meat.
It is just fantastic.
And so give it a try.
But that's not the only thing they're good at.
I mean, they have some killer sandwiches there.
They have really good burn ends.
The burn ends are really good.
And like I said, we talked about this.
I think it was a podcast or someone emailing us and they're talking about if good slicing
beef should have a lot of fat in it.
And we said no, because it should be a good cut of beef with plenty of marbling.
Well, that's what they do there.
There is no fat on the outside of it.
And the inside is tender and juicy.
So they know how to do it right.
So I know how come they won the American Royal a few times.
So yeah, anyhow, so it's pretty cool.
In France and Spain, they began writing tickets to people on speakerphone in a public area.
I mean, these idiots are really annoying because they talk really loud and the speaker is really loud.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Yes, yes.
I know exactly what you're talking about.
It is fucking annoying, isn't it?
Yeah, I would rather have my ears fall out.
I would rather be the only one talking.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't want other people to hear what the people, the person I'm talking to is saying.
Yeah, yeah.
You know, and now I know how come so many people put in earbuds because I don't have to listen to those idiots on the speakerphones and the speaker loud and then they're fucking talking loud.
You know, I want to hear somebody's dumb shit brain dead conversation.
So the person in front of me at the store was having some sort of a low budget conversation about how to dress to hide back fat.
I'm not kidding.
Yeah.
And I'm like, oh my gosh.
You know, it was hell.
I'm just sitting there going, what the hell?
I can't believe I'm sitting here listening to somebody talk as loud as they can to someone as loud as they can on a speakerphone talking about how they hide back fat in clothing.
So and I'm not kidding you at all.
This was so loud I got a call from my mom's doctor's office because we had to get a refill of medication.
I had to call them back because the loud talk was was so loud.
You know, all I could hear was about how they hide fucking back fat.
You know, the whole thing I'm getting at is this right here.
If Francis Bane, they're doing it.
I hope it comes over here quickly.
It cannot come over here quickly enough.
I want some fines levied out because I want people to stop this because it's annoying as fuck.
Get in the break room.
People talking as loud as they can.
You know, you're over there having a conversation or trying to watch TV or something.
Or they're watching a video really, really loud and it's like, what the fuck?
It's like, where do you grow up?
Worse yet, worse yet. You're in a car with somebody and they get a phone call and they put them on over Bluetooth and through their car stereo.
Yes, yes.
And as a matter of fact, I've had that.
That's even worse.
I was with a friend of mine when somebody said something about someone was in the car and they didn't know.
Right.
Yeah, they go, hey man, let's just say, hey, how's that fucking dumbass Billy?
Is he still scratching his fucking warts or something? Right.
And he was right there.
And the guy's like, I got to go.
But it was too late.
And I'm just sitting there secretly thinking, aha, that's awesome. Good.
I'll tell you what, tell you what, you can't catch a lot of nerd on somebody that way.
Oh, yes, you can.
That was the only time that happened.
That was just a really, really good way of explaining sometimes how that happens.
So, like, yeah, anyhow, I agree.
So anyhow, Rob, how much snow did you guys get down there? Were the roads bad?
Tell me some stuff.
About 7 a.m.
We were back until about 7 a.m.
It started coming down.
About the time I was leading board.
And then the roads started getting covered and everything.
The road crews did their job. The roads are clear.
It was pretty much steady all day.
It accumulated, then it's like it quit accumulating, but it kept coming down.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, I know what you mean.
We had a lot of spitting and flurries and moderate snow,
but it really didn't seem to accumulate after last night's event.
Last night?
Yeah, it was just enough to screw up the morning.
Yeah, yeah, about the same.
Like I said, we got two and a half, probably about three inches of snow,
and all this happened in about three hours last night.
I woke up about two, I look outside,
and it just started snowing, the ground was still there.
And then I wake up about six, and the ground was covered,
and it was about two inches deep.
And then I get up about eight, and it pretty much stopped snowing by that time,
and that's when we had about three inches.
So we had probably three or four hours of snow,
and then the rest of the time it was kind of spitting here and there.
They missed it pretty big time up here.
We were supposed to get six or seven inches, possibly even eight.
That's good. That's always a good time.
No, that's not a complaint.
That's not a complaint.
But now we have ice coming in Saturday.
We have snow coming in Tuesday.
And then we have like three days of bullshit weather periodically
in the next five or six days.
So anyhow, winter's here.
It's not going away.
It's not my fault this time.
I have not said one thing about Mother Nature.
Am I right?
No, no, actually we have been defending her.
Yes, ever since the Great Tornado thing last year,
I mulled off about her about one tornado,
and then that night she sent four of us, four of them here.
And I was like...
Oh, you gave her an ass paddle. Come on.
I gave her an ass paddle. Yes.
What did you expect?
She promptly gave me one about two in the morning
with the sirens going off.
So I was like...
I think now you know better than to ass paddle farther time.
Yes, yes, I'm not.
I'm not. No way.
Or ass paddling the Grim Reaper or anything like that.
No, no, no, no.
I'm laying low.
I'm not getting on their radar.
So anyhow, yeah, yeah.
And the first thing I thought was, oh shit, don't take cover.
I think I should have never ass paddled her.
That's the first thing I think.
I woke up with the fucking sirens.
I was like, oh man.
It's my fault. My fault.
One ass paddling in Mother Nature
just completely flipped out on us.
So anyhow.
Well, do you want to take our first break and come back
because last night's episode we only took one break.
I noticed that. I noticed that after we hung up.
I just said, we only did one break.
It was a weird episode.
Well, it was.
We were talking in the mood last night.
Yeah, we were.
We got out of the boat.
And also I was running late too.
I called you what, about 8 after or something.
I just got in the door.
And yeah, yeah.
So it was kind of a weird episode.
It was kind of hurried.
I had to get all my stuff together and all that stuff.
But it went really well.
You and I had plenty to yak about.
So all right, and actually it downloaded really good.
Well, before we go for a break,
go ahead.
Oh, I said it downloaded really well.
In the, I don't know, 10 hours, 11 hours it's been up.
It really got a lot of downloads.
I'm pretty happy with it.
Anyhow, go ahead. What now?
Oh, before we go to break, I just wanted to mention,
you remember here a week or two ago
I was talking about how me and the Lube Welder
have decided to put together a support group?
Uh-huh.
For the Musically Bipolar.
Yes, I am in there.
We have, we're getting off the ground here.
We're calling it the MBPG, Music Bipolar Group.
We are meeting every Thursday at 7 p.m.
right here in my bunker.
Everybody is welcome.
We're just going to sit around,
support each other in our illness.
Yeah, that, make me a part of that, okay?
I'll call in.
Yeah, you are. You are.
Okay, I'll be in there.
Anybody and everybody is welcome to show up to my bunker.
We have like three guys at work,
said they'll be here tomorrow night.
Oh, cool. Okay.
Is this going to be in the Duck Blind Studio?
No, no, no. Nobody gets entered into the studio.
Okay, okay. All right.
I don't know who I can trust.
We're going to stay in the living room,
dining room, kitchen area.
Okay. Oh.
Yeah, nobody comes to the studio.
Yesterday I was talking about the old man that used to,
with the funny business card, you know,
in New Orleans at the French Market,
and he did the old concert tickets.
I found some of his shirts on eBay,
but they're way too expensive.
Yeah, I guess he was pretty famous for that.
I didn't know that.
I just knew him as some old man with a cool business card
that did cool shirts at the French Market in New Orleans.
That's all I knew.
But I guess they're kind of preferred.
I loved them.
I guess a lot of people are like that
because they sell them on eBay,
only the price is really, really jacked up.
I only paid like 20 for mine.
I mean, he didn't charge a whole lot
for doing all this stuff himself.
I mean, he was pretty reasonable for that type of a shirt,
a special-made one.
But anyhow, they are on eBay right now.
I'm not going to pull the trigger.
He probably gathered quite a follow.
He must have because it's not just one or two.
It's quite a few of them.
Quite a few of them are on eBay right now.
But the problem is, I want 60, 70 bucks.
I'm like, no, I'm not going to do that.
And most of them don't even fit me anyhow.
I was like, I'm not going to wear that.
Fuck.
I'll look like fucking Tommy Boy in that shirt or whatever.
Yeah.
Yeah, so, yeah.
Let's see.
What else?
You know what?
I don't know what the hell it is.
Let's take our first break and come right back.
I have got some emails if you want to get into them
or if you got something you want to talk about, we'll do that.
So we'll be right back.
We'll decide when we get there.
Okay.
Hey, everybody.
This is Uncle Rob.
I'm going to give you some tips for life.
This is Uncle Rob's Rules to Dick Picks.
Rule number one, title will pick in someone else's name.
So if you get busted, it's not yours.
Rule number two, shoot angles complementary to your length and girth.
Rule number four, no propping of the way.
Absolutely no undercarriage.
Very important.
Have you ever wondered where something came from?
Have you ever looked at something and said,
I wonder what the origin of that is?
Well, so have we.
That's why we gave you The Origin of.
The Origin of Velcro.
George D. Mestral found inspiration in his most famous invention
and he found those annoying little burrs that can get stuck to your clothing
after a walk in the woods.
They came from the burdock plant.
And when D. Mestral put them under a microscope,
he realized that they made use of little tiny hooks on the surface of the burr
to grab onto whatever passes by.
Now, I was requested a tour of the Talk is Cheap Studio.
Why someone wants to see this, we have no idea.
Come on in, the door's open.
Oh, hey guys, come on in.
I've been expecting you.
Now, look at this.
I have this Falstaff sign.
It's probably from the 1940s or 50s.
And I have this Kansas City Chiefs wine from the last two Super Bowls that they won.
And I hope I get another one.
Over here I have my Fuck Off sign, my On Air sign, and my Saturn sign,
and my Skull sign.
And look at that.
It's a Boss poster and an RC and a Yimling.
This shit is so cool, man.
Don't you guys think it's cool?
Damn it, guys.
Who the hell made us come through this anyway?
This guy's an idiot.
Let's get the hell out of here.
Shit.
Somewhere in the heavens, your great Grammy Gertrude is crying
because her little Bebo is listening to this film.
Hi, y'all.
This is Chicago.
I am the most dangerous city in North America.
You can't touch me.
Oh, yeah?
This is Kansas City here.
Hold my beer, bitch.
Hey there, fuckstick.
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.
Bumblebees have been proven to sing to their young.
Please remember to go to Cole's dressing room, wait five minutes, and scream,
Hey, there's no toilet paper in here.
Topher, Mark, and Rob would like you to know that just because they have a podcast
does not mean their asshole does not stink.
I know them pretty well, and their asshole does stink.
So, just so you know, their asshole stinks just like yours.
Two douchebags and microphone.
I am the Mark portion of this.
And I am Rob.
Okay, you want to go into emails or you got something you want to go into, Rob?
Yeah, I got something that will go into emails.
This is not my bed.
I'm waiting to get out.
Okay, sounds good.
If you had plans to see Ken Rock, Nickelback, and several other artists at a music festival in Missouri in May,
you need to find something else to do as there are multiple reports that the event has been canceled.
I first saw a mention that the Rock the Country Festival,
except for May and Pop the Block, was canceled on Missouri's subreddit.
After some digging around, I found that KWC shared details on their Facebook page that the rumor was true.
The initial reports indicate that the festival and Pop the Block was canceled due to low ticket sales.
The festival was scheduled to include Headliners, Ken Rock, and Nickelback.
While the Rock the Country Festival and Pop the Block has been canceled in May,
there are indications that promoters in the area and at the venue will continue to bring entertainment to that part of Missouri.
They canceled that whole thing.
I guess low ticket sales.
But come on, it's for May. This is only February.
Yeah, you know what, Dad?
There's no chance. I mean, come on. People don't even have the tax returns back yet.
No, I know. And that's the way the events are going.
Topher actually talked about this on one of the Music Creeps.
What they do is all of this is on an alleged event.
It's not in stone. It's not in stone until they get enough ticket sales.
So what they do is...
That's right. You guys did touch on that.
Yeah. And the problem is if they deem that it's not worthy,
maybe they're like, well, we should be at 90% right now. We're not. So we're not doing it.
Here's the deal. They already got your money.
And in many cases, a lot of these ticket outlets, they only give you credit.
They only give you a refund. So they pretty much got your money.
You see, they don't care. All they want, they want you to give your money at first.
And it's just half the auditorium. Okay.
And then they, you know, they have the right.
And it's all there in the fine writing when you buy that ticket.
They have the right to cancel or move or do whatever they want to the event at their leisure.
So, and all this allegedly just cover our ass, all that stuff. Okay.
So basically what they do is they take your money and put it in a little holding cell.
And then they decide whether they got enough of that money to go ahead and have the concert or not.
So you're giving your money for nothing.
And what's happening now is a lot of people are going to go aren't buying tickets yet because they know this.
See what I'm saying? People like me, the word is out.
It's like, I'm not going to buy a ticket to something that might not happen.
So these promoters are screwing themselves because people are getting tired of this.
Like you guys are going to keep my money or at the very least you're going to have my money for four months.
And then you're going to give it back to me at some point.
No, why don't you give me a little interest on that if you're going to do that, you know, how about if I just throw it in a bank, make some money off of that instead of you making money off of me and dry jacking me about a concert that may not exist.
So you know what? You're going to see a lot more of this, Rob, a lot more of this.
And yeah, and Topher is absolutely right. I got to reading up on it and it fucking pisses me off.
I hate that industry. And I'll tell you what, man, that's why I only go to small concerts anymore, like the Woff's concert or something like that.
And then even though screw me out, I mean, because the one over there, the Mozart Music Fest is going to have Glenn Hughes and Starship and Heddy's.
Well, it got rained out. I didn't get my money back. And who do I go to about it?
It's fucking bullshit. Yeah. So why would I want to even go to a smaller event now? Because even they do that.
I looked through my visa that was paid on their thing. I didn't see anything, nothing. Then I sent him an email.
Got no reply. So, yeah, I pretty much got screwed in my opinion. So why would I do that anymore? All this is allegedly to just in case whatever, you know.
So, yeah, I mean, I get it. And I'm getting to where I'm just like, you know what? I don't think I need concerts anymore.
I don't think I need them in my life because in my opinion, the people that are doing it are screwing everybody over.
You know, and I'll bet you that's what happened there.
Well, thank you, Rob. Thanks for bringing that up because that is a point that needed to be made.
I mean, some people may not listen to the music creeps and may not be their thing, but they listen to this.
That needs to get out more. I mean, I know a lot of people know it and that's kind of leading to concerts being canceled or whatever.
But you know what? It's better than people going and putting down their money and waiting for months for this event that never happens.
They might as well know right off what might happen. Right. Right. Oh, a lot of people went through that.
I had bought two tickets to see Leonard Skinner here at Ozark Ample Theater. Well, the concert got canceled.
They never rescheduled. I go to for my money. Bingo. Bingo. I ate those two tickets. Yeah.
Yeah, they do this all the time. And it fucking it's wrong.
And you know, if Congress had a shred of decency, they would really do something about this instead of acting like they did.
Yeah. Yeah. But if the band would have came back, rescheduled and did come back, but they did not.
No, I know. If they would have come back, I still could have used the tickets. Yeah. See. Yep.
Dennis D. Young. I was getting ready to see him. And this is before COVID. And I, you know, I was big sticks buff.
I know you were too. Right. Yeah. Well, I like both versions. I like the Tommy Shaw heavier stuff.
And I also like the Broadway Dennis D. Young stuff. I like them both. I do, too. I love them both, actually.
So I even like Mr. Roboto somewhat. But yeah, I do, too. First off, it was canceled by COVID.
And then the tickets that I had said, OK, just hold on to them. OK, still going to be at the Ameristar or whatever.
All right. Cool. So after COVID was was still a thing, but they were, you know, having concerts again.
Everybody's wearing a mask and all that, you know, late 20 or 21 or whatever.
So, you know, they already had the vaccine out. And so everybody was getting a little bit more comfortable with going out.
OK, so anyhow, it's going to go see it again. And then it was canceled because of an illness.
So it never did happen. So that whole time I got my money back on that one.
But the problem is, is they had my money for two years. All right. Yeah.
So about a little interest, then, in my opinion, I mean, you know what?
If you're going to hold someone's money that long, add another five or six bucks to that. Make it worth it.
I could put that somewhere else. I could put that stock in something.
Cryptocurrency or something I could have made like, I don't know, maybe 50 bucks off of that or something.
That or give you your choice of tickets to another show.
You know what, Rob? That's a great point because all these production companies and all that and the promoters, they handle a lot of different concerts.
Right. How about give us our choice? That's a great point. Thank you, Rob.
I'm glad you brought that up. If you're going to screw me on these tickets, give me a choice. At least give me a choice on a couple others.
It may not be my first choice, but at least I get something out of it.
Right. At least you get something out of it. You'll get a little satisfaction.
Yeah. Yeah. I know they couldn't fit it.
And you get a night out on the table.
Yeah. You know what? Yeah. But that's never going to happen.
And there's going to be the concert seats going to really be dwindling more and more because the word is out on all these concert events and how they do things anymore.
And people are not happy with it.
So anyhow, thank you, Rob. I'm glad you brought up all of that. That was perfect.
You're welcome.
Okay.
Now, I want to hear from the assholes.
Yes. Yes. Email us. Let us know what you think. Thank you, Rob. Man, you're full of all kinds of good shit tonight, dude.
Hey. I had a good day today. It wasn't like yesterday. I actually feel like I accomplished something today.
What the hell did they put in your cake?
I was in a better mood.
What did they put in your cake last night?
I went to bed after eight.
Oh, okay. Couldn't believe it. Okay.
All right. Got some emails. Sound good?
Sounds good.
All right. Mark, what's your all-time, and I don't know why I didn't ask you, but I'm going to ask you, Rob, too, because I want to know yours.
Mark, what's your all-time favorite Deep Purple song? Vance and Nashville. I think the reason he only asks me is he, I'm a big Deep Purple crazed, you know?
Yeah.
And you're not so, you love him, but not like me. And I think that's why he-
I always more into Rainbow.
Yes. And I think that's why he only asks me. But I'm going to ask you, because I want to hear. But, okay, let me think.
I think probably my very favorite Deep Purple song is probably Perfect Strangers, the song.
The album might be one of my favorite, too, or at least in the top three.
Right.
But the song Perfect Strangers, to me, is the best song they've ever done.
But, I mean, that's saying a lot, because there's a lot of songs just right, right below them that are really close.
Just me, that's just a little bit better than all the other classics. So, Rob?
I'm going to have to go with Smoke on the Water.
Nothing wrong with that.
Well, it's proportional. I mean, a lot of different memories.
I understand.
When my son was a baby and was sleeping in his bed, to put him to sleep, I had a radio in his bedroom.
I gave him music, you know.
Is this the one getting married?
Yeah.
Okay.
And I would stand and hold him. And we would rock and just kind of dance around. And that's how I put him to sleep.
Okay.
And I would sing to him, Smoke on the Water, because I knew the words.
Dude, I love that story.
And to this day, to this day, my son loves Smoke on the Water. He'll break out singing it.
That's cool.
Yeah, I like it. I just smoke on the water.
Wow. Very cool. Nice. That's a great memory. I understand completely.
I mean, that's true. That's a true story.
I believe you. I mean, it's a great song anyhow. Even if it didn't have any memories like that, I'd be like, okay, I get it.
But cool. That's very cool.
Next one. Hey, guys. You have three more people that want to tear down that ridiculous chimney.
I'm sure I can round up more. Jojo and Adrian.
Oh, so there's a major in you.
I want to see. I know that's Bates County. But I wish I had a platform to tell me.
Well, I guess I could. I'd have to count them all. But that would take a long time to go on each day to day.
I'd like to know what percentage of what we have in Cass County. We have a ridiculous amount of numbers in Cass County.
I almost bet why Jojo wants to help.
Why is that?
They drive by it every day going back and forth.
Yes. They're off the highway. You look at it.
It's atrocious. Yeah.
Yeah, Jojo. Thank you. How's Adrian? Well, you can't answer me, but you know, email me. How's Adrian these days?
I haven't been through there in a long, long time. There used to be a restaurant there. What was the name of it?
Oh, yeah. How you stopped in there over there?
Yeah, it was really good. You know what? I'm not going to remember right now. Yeah. You know what? I'll look it up later.
So, OK. Next one. Would you like some stories, suggestions? My job is to scour the Internet and I've found some dandies.
Rachel, sure. Email me. Sure. Email me the same address that you emailed us and send me some stories. I'd love some ideas.
I mean, right, Rob? I mean, anything. Yeah, Rob. Anybody else? The weird ones you can pitch me.
There you go. Send that to Rob. Whatever. If you want to throw out your email address, you can. Whatever.
OK. We're just sending it to you. OK. OK. That's what we have to do. Yeah, that's right.
And also, if there's something you want us to talk about, too, feel free. Yeah. It's an open door policy.
It goes to anybody. It goes to anybody. Yeah. It's just like down at the city market. People are well.
They're welcome to say anything. We may or may not agree with it, but we're going to let them say it.
So all right. Next one. What did you guys think of the halftime show at the Super Bowl? Weasel in Tennessee.
I don't really have an opinion. That's not really my type of music. That's not my thing.
So I really didn't watch it. So I didn't care. I really don't know how to rate it. You, Rob?
To be honest, I had to go outside to smoke my cigarettes. So, you know, where do you think I was at halftime?
I had to comfort eat because of the squirt halftime. So I had to go get some more wings and stuff.
So I didn't even see it. So, you know, I was like I was over there crying in my pit.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had to cry in my fucking wings the whole halftime. So all right. Next one.
Could you please get out of my son? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yep. Buddy. You didn't think I was going to happen, did you?
Well, no, his his soon to be bride. I'm sure I know she's a lovely woman from what you said. So he's doing.
Yeah. He's doing well. I love it. Cool. So yeah, it worked out.
Next one. Could you please give out the damn email address a little more than once every six months?
It took me forever to find an episode that you gave it out on the podcast. John and Casey.
Yes, I can. It's do 66. Do speed 66 at Yahoo dot com. But what did you want?
What did you want? What did you want to say to us?
Oh, well, let's just make a promo. I've got one. We can.
You know, I'm going to have to remember, you know, I've got I've got the voice guy. I forgot his fucking name. The real voice guy.
I got him doing one somewhere. I got to find it.
Should I? Damn it. I can't remember his name now. Anyhow, he listens to he's going to be mad.
So anyhow, we haven't talked about voice guy over a year or so.
I got to get back to him because there's certain things I want him to do.
And I got a pile of I try not to bother him unless I have a pile of work for him because he's really busy.
He does this for he actually does it for some radio stations, too.
But his main thing is podcasts and videocasts and stuff like that. He's a voice guy for him.
Chad, Chad, that's it. That's it. Yeah.
So I said, Hi, Chad. I try not to bother you.
Like, you know, I only give you a pile of work at a time because I know that's how you like it.
And, you know, he told me right off the bat, he said, don't send me one here and there.
He said, give me an hour's worth of work or something like that, he said, because I'm way too busy to do one here and one there.
And also, he gets a little bit more and I understand, you know, you know, just one here and there.
He doesn't get that much money from. So if I give him an hour or two's worth of work, then, you know, he's got a little bit something to do there.
So, yeah, anyhow, Chad, I'm going to get with you here soon.
But Chad did a he did a promo. I got to find it. I don't know what I labeled it as or nothing because I look for it not too long ago.
So I'll find it. OK, the last one. Ha ha, my Eagles kicked your ass. Jimbo. Yeah.
Congratulations. Yeah, congratulations. Yeah, the Eagles, your Eagles kicked my chief's ass. What else?
Your defense was strong. Yeah, you guys did. They're denying it. Yeah, you guys are the best team in the NFL this season.
I don't know what else to say. So if that made you feel better, there you go.
All right, Rob, you got something. Yeah, I do. OK.
This is going to take us back to the 90s.
If you were old enough to watch the news or read the papers back in the late 90s, you're very likely remember Dolly, the clone sheep.
Yes. Remember the first clone sheep? Yes, I do.
Actually, first cloned anything. Yep. Born in 1996, the researchers responsible for cloning her kept it quiet for months until the research paper was published.
Knowledge claimed the fame was that she was the very first mammal to be successfully cloned from a single adult sheep cell.
Before this, scientists did not know cloning in this manner could result in a living, breathing, healthy animal.
The implications were immense and the world began to both fear and grow, excited over what this could mean for human cloning.
Dolly was born like any other sheep. Once her embryo was far enough along, she was implanted into her surrogate mother.
She had a normal birth and lived a normal sheep life with a flock at the Roslyn Institute.
Dolly even had children. She gave birth to six lambs with a Welsh mountain sheep named David.
I didn't even know that. Wow, I didn't know that she could be reproductive. Wow.
In 2001, Dolly developed arthritis, which was tree with medication, but didn't lead to fears that Dolly's health was suffering.
When she was only six years old, she developed a progressive lung disease and the decision was made to have her put to sleep.
While some feared Dolly's early death and that grown animals would suffer from disease leading to early death,
the Roslyn Institute cloned four other sheep from the same line. These four would go on to lead normal, healthy lives.
Okay. Huh. Yeah. So she learned to be six. Yeah.
To be honest, that's longer than anybody would think. Well, I don't know how long sheep live. How long do sheep live?
How long do sheep live, Dino? Hang on. Let me take a look here. Six years. Six years. Oh, really? So she lived it. Yeah. Okay.
She lived six years. She had children. Uh huh. Well, she did have two then. Yeah. Yeah. She had sheep. That's it. Dolly spent out six years.
That is so... Literally. To me, that is just so amazing. That's what she called baby sheep. Yeah.
The average lifespan of sheep is 10 to 12 years. That's why they're freaking out. Okay. Yeah. That's not bad.
No. No. I mean, let's see. In which they seem to be commercially productive is around five years earlier.
Hence, most domestic sheep are killed at around half of their potential lifespan. Okay. Okay. So, alright. Most of the times they're killed by then anyhow.
So, yeah. I mean, she... Those are the same. One disease. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, you know, anybody can, you know... Okay.
Any animal can get that. So she had pretty normal life. Wow. I just find that amazing that they can reproduce and everything, you know.
Wow. Now, if they start cloning humans, then that's going to really freak me out because I believe in souls. You know.
I believe everyone has a soul. What is that if they do that? I mean, you know what I mean? I'm just like... Right. Yeah.
I don't want anything to do with that actually. So, I don't know if they're going to clone like people's body parts, like if someone needs a new heart or whatever.
Or if someone loses their limb, if they can put one back on. I don't know what all they can do.
But it's going to be interesting because, you know, there's the stem cell stuff already is interesting because there's a lot of stem cell they don't do here in America that they do overseas.
A lot of places in Germany and stuff like that, that like on arthritic conditions, because I told this before on the music creeps, I think here.
Eddie Van Halen and also Tony Iommi suffered from the same arthritic condition in their hands. There's nothing they can do about it here.
But they went to Germany. I think Eddie Van Halen was the first one to go to Germany. And then he got the cure.
And then Tony Iommi thought he couldn't play anymore either like Eddie did. And he went over to the same guy in Germany and he was cured.
And he came back and played guitar for years later. Eddie Van Halen, of course, he, you know, he passed away so he can't play anymore.
But he played until he passed away. So, the stem cell stuff is really interesting as well.
Let's see. Let's take our second break. I'm going to come back with a new cologne that people might like.
Sounds good.
All right. We will be right back.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.
I will roast you. But my mom told me to not burn trash.
Harambe used to listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheek Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder.
Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheek Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder anymore.
You might ask why Harambe never listens to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheek Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder.
Well, it's because Harambe is dead.
Senselessly murdered because some idiot did not watch her child properly while looking on her phone.
Sadly, Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and the Cheek Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder or any other show anymore.
Sorry, Harambe.
Your mama is so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
You watched the news. It was grim. Is an apocalypse inevitable?
We suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand and have multiple mobile chargers. We have the Post-Apocalypse List.
Remember, communication is essential post-apocalypse.
You must have two-ray radios that are solar-chargeable. Have several on hand in case any of them do break.
That way, if one is out guarding the perimeter of your property or out gathering food or whatever, you can stay in communication and know where the other person is.
Oh shit, what's that over there? Oh no, it's the island of horrible jokes.
Ugh!
I asked my date to meet me at the gym. She didn't show up. I guess we're not going to work out.
Hey there, fuckstick. You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.
A pet turtle named Sashi is thought to be the oldest one in captivity at 120 years old.
Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser.
You're pretty and I'm cute. Together we could be pretty cute.
Hey everybody, this is Uncle Rob. I'm going to give you some tips for life.
This is Uncle Rob's rules to dick pics.
Rule number one, title of a pic is someone else's name. So if you get busted, it's not yours.
Rule number two, shoot angles complementary to your length and girth.
Rule number four, no propping of the way. Absolutely no undercarriage. Very important.
Oh man, what the fuck is this? Is this a new feature?
What's inside Mark's head? Sounds stupid to me.
Is Alanis Morissette still pissed off?
The aboutlips just happened. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to go. But we can tell you what you can eat.
Chickweed is an edible plant and a herbal remedy that can be used in various ways.
Chopped chickweed can be added to soups, eggs, pastas or pizzas.
It can also be blended into hummus or pesto. It can also make chickweed into an oil for your skin for burns and minor cuts.
But it can also be used as a tea drink or just munch it raw for a tasty healthy snack.
Now, from a sundry brown bunker in Camden, Missouri, stocked full of dried guts, canned food and a couple of vibrating toys.
It's ramblings of a madman featuring Rob Rand.
The cheapest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.
Next up, Things Overheard in Hell.
Howard Stern just signed a 10-year contract extension.
And Mark.
And I am Rob.
All right.
I'm in the Greenhawking, Kansas City.
No, he is in Camden, Missouri, which is two and a half hours southeast of Kansas City at the beautiful, luxurious Lake of the Ozarks.
The Niagara River Arm. The best part of it.
Oh, real quick, before I get into my story here, I want to let everybody know that it's been asking and I appreciate the asking.
I appreciate the interest.
Sports Bastards are off.
We're going to do a draft special, but we're off until September.
We don't do any sports except the NFL.
We do a little bit of college sports, but we do that during the NFL season.
So it is done. We're going to replace it with something else.
At this time, we have not determined what it is.
But until then, you get double music creeps and maybe even a douche bag.
Topher and I might do a douche bag or two also.
So, you know, you're still going to get a lot of content.
It's just not going to be the sports bastards.
So, all right, Domino's is launching a pepperoni inspired perfume for Valentine's Day.
What do you think, Rob?
Oh, I got to do something my daughter could move.
Okay. She works for Domino's.
Oh, hey, ask her if she can get you some.
I'm going to have to. I'll write that down.
All right. Domino's is launching pepperoni inspired perfume to entice pizza lovers this Valentine's Day.
So I don't know if it's on sale right now.
You might ask her, I don't know if it's on sale right now or only Valentine's Day.
It didn't really actually specify it.
The limited edition clone is a nod to its pepperoni passion pizza
and is said to have irresistible notes of spice, pepper and a woody warm base.
To mark the launch of Domino's newest creation, Domino's created a commercial feature
and married at first sight United Kingdom star Luke DeBano on a quest to find passion
with Luke spraying his body with a fragrance from a pizza shaped bottle.
This article does not state a price, so I'm not sure how this gimmick will run you.
This will be cool if it doesn't run you very much,
but I will check on this further and try to get a firm price on it.
At this point, I could not find one and I don't know if it's on sale right now
or if it's only Valentine's Day or what.
So I'm going to try to figure all that out, but that's coming out either now or is or whatever.
So and I think maybe Rob's daughter can maybe fill him in on anything else.
So Rob, if you hit it.
I know, she knows everything about it.
It's probably is probably not even connected to a Domino store at all.
It's probably online thing like the McRib sauce.
So yeah, yeah, but I can mention to her and she said she's taking the Earth.
Hey, did you hear about this?
There you go.
Yeah, if they can find out about it, let me know.
So I will.
All right.
I mean, I get something like that just for fun.
If it's cheap enough, I mean, I'm not going to spend a ton of money on it.
I mean, you know, I mean, I could smell like pizza for everybody.
Yeah, I could smell like pizza from eating it.
So why would I want to eat it and smell like instead of spraying?
So, you know, OK, Rob, we turn to you.
OK, with the corresponding decades, R.E.M. has been a household name since the 1980s.
Yet surprisingly, many fans remain clueless about the meaning behind the iconic band's name.
I have a feeling, but I'm not going to say anything.
And I'm going to tell you if I was right.
So go ahead.
All right.
Well, I'm going to give a little bit of background about the band first.
OK.
The group originally consisting of drummer Bill Berry, guitarist Peter Buck,
bassist Mike Mills and lead vocalist Michael Stipe pioneered Delta and rock genre.
Following Berry's departure in 1997 due to health concerns,
the remaining members of R.E.M. continued to produce hits until their eventual disbandment
14 years later having sold an impressive 90 million albums worldwide.
Wow.
Their extensive discography includes beloved tracks such as Losing My Religion,
Everybody Hurts, The One I Love, It's the End of the World as We Know It,
Blue, Oh My Heart, Shining Happy People, Night Swimming and Dr.
Yeah, they had quite a few hits.
Yeah, they did.
They were in the 90s.
Yeah, they did.
However, a question posed by fans on Reddit sparked curiosity.
What does R.E.M. stand for?
According to an American songwriter,
Yay!
Yes, the band's origins date back to the early 1980s when Buck and Stipe first met
at Wuxley Records, a record store in Athens,
wandering over their shared music taste.
Reflecting on that encounter, Stipe recalled,
it turns out that I was buying all the records that Buck was saving for himself.
The duo later connected with Barry and Mills,
their mutual friends who had been making music together since high school.
The four of them had to play together.
There was Stipe remarking.
There was never any grand playing behind any of it.
They would rehearse at the St. Mary's Episcopal Church on Oconee Street in Athens.
They played their first show on April 5th, 1990.
Athens, Georgia? Athens, Greece?
It doesn't say.
Okay. I guess it doesn't matter. It's just me wondering. Go ahead.
Yeah. Performing a mix of originals and covers from the 60s and 70s,
this is a band contemplated a variety of names, including cans of piss,
salt mines, and twisted kites.
Ultimately, however, they decided on OEM.
Stipe had randomly chosen the name from a dictionary.
The acronym is recognized as shorthand for rapid eye movement.
Shit. I hit it. I hit it. That's what I thought it was. Okay.
Which refers to the dream stage of sleep during which one's eyes darken around under their eyelids.
Okay. Cool. Go ahead. Keep going. I'm glad.
That's what it meant.
That's like the deep sleep when you have rapid eye movement while you're sleeping.
Okay. Cool. That's good to know.
Yeah. That's where they came up with the name.
All right. I'm just a little impressed with myself right now.
I pat myself on the back and hurt myself.
Yeah. You got to know your pat for me.
All right. Thanks.
I've got something here. Let's see. Which one do I want to do?
I've got all these. I've got a bunch of weird stories here that I wanted to get to for a while.
And these are the stories like after we get done bullshitting about life and all that stuff,
then we get to some weird stories that we want to cover, right?
This one is pretty weird.
Okay.
Oh.
Would that not suck?
Okay.
So, the volunteer actually got a level of a mouthful of ashes because the wind caught him, and suddenly when you get a mouthful of human ashes, it's quite distressing and it just happens far too regularly.
Corona, 71, told the BBC.
Despite numerous requests not to spread human ashes across the flower beds, we arrived today, Tuesday, February 4th, to find a large area covered in them, the appeal red.
These things, they throw them on this flower bed that these people beautified really nice, right?
And this, it sounds like a riverfront park of some sort, okay, from what this article says.
That's what I take. And what people are doing is they're throwing their ashes on it, and then these people are coming to do work on that park, and the ashes are blowing in their face and they're swallowing them.
That is fucked. That is nasty.
I had a conversation with my cousin's widow just this weekend.
She told me how she took his ashes down to Key West and threw them in.
Uh-huh. A lot of people do that.
She said the first thing she did was check the wind direction because she knew just as soon as she threw them ashes, they would blow back on her. She knew he would have a laugh laugh.
So she took the wind direction and threw them up.
Well, okay, number one, I would never want it happening to me. It's still gross.
But a majority of those ashes are the coffin that they put you in to burn you up.
But you still have some human ashes in there, which is gross enough.
But from what I understand, if it's true, a human only puts out like a little bit of ashes, not as many as you would think.
So they have to have some sort of substance. So they put you in some sort of a box coffin and then burn you up.
So they have they have more ashes to, you know, here's your loved ones.
You know, it's kind of like a filler. It's filler with your with parts of your ashes in it.
But I still wouldn't want it in my mouth. So anyhow, anyhow, so two things need to be considered.
Firstly, it is illegal to spread ashes on the ground without the appropriate permission to do so.
And that's the same here, too. But people do it anyhow.
Secondly, and even more importantly, our our volunteer gardeners get really upset having to handle human remains.
The practice is generally legal in the UK with permission from the landholder.
As long as environmental rules are followed in the United States, guidelines vary by state.
I think most states it is illegal. There may be some that it's not a popular location such as national parks.
Warners can request a special use permit from the National Park Service for what is known as memorialization.
In an interview with the local newspaper, Richard Budgie, Parks and Amenities and Facilities Officer at Truro City Council,
said that this hasn't been an issue in the city parks that acknowledge that sunny corner has been struggling of late.
If you spread human ashes, it can be distressing for those who come across their remains.
Remind people that if they want to scatter ashes, they need to contact us and apply, Budgie said.
So the lady that works there, Karan, admitted that she understands the pool of the beautiful spot.
But she then said you really need to get permission and this really is not the place.
But if it continues, they may have to allocate a space with a permit to do this.
And then they don't go over there. It would be like, I don't know, a bed full of ashes.
And, you know, that way they can regulate it. So you're over there throwing your loved ones ashes in that bed over there.
Then they, you know, don't have anyone do it for a couple weeks, let it dissolve, and then they go over there and work on it.
But they have to have some sort of a system because they're getting tired of getting these things in their face and their mouth and their eyes.
So I get it. Hey, Rob, we turn to you. That sucks. It really does.
No, no, I'm sitting here looking at my next story. Okay. Funny how we're hitting together tonight.
Yeah. Ecolovers can now be buried in the world's first living coffin, which decomposes faster and is made out of mushrooms.
It's more than just mushrooms. The coffins have grown out of pliable mycelium, a man of fibers, upcycled hemp plants rather than traditional wood.
Mycelium, which grows like thread, aids decomposition by breaking down biological matter, biograining within just 45 days.
Mycelium is the root structure of mushrooms. Made by Dutch company Luthe Biotech, the coffins can be grown in just a week and feed the earth with your very own nutrients.
Okay. General Director Pallet had these in Forest Hill, Southeast London, was the first in the UK to offer one of these ink coffins, officially starting to stop them last week.
Yeah, so the coffin breaks down faster, so your body will break down faster and you will feed into the earth.
Okay. Okay, well, fine.
Everything dissolves faster. Decomposes.
Okay. Wow. I mean, that is pretty cool. That is pretty cool.
And it adds nutrients to the ground.
Yeah, yeah, because I think mycelium is kind of almost like a light wood product, I believe, like bamboo.
I believe if I'm right, if this is what we're talking about.
And then mushrooms. What?
It does say it's a man of fibers and hemp plants.
Oh, okay, of hemp. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, hemp would be similar to bamboo. I didn't know it was specifically hemp, but I think I know what you're talking about.
And I mean, that makes a lot of sense. I mean, you know, it breaks down quick. You don't use trees, you know, and it's probably, well, I don't know if it's cheaper right now, but eventually would be when they mass produce them.
I think. So, anyhow. Thank you, Rob. Very cool.
All I gotta say is I'm giving that much for a damn call, but I'm going to buy one that lasts a while.
Get some money for it.
Okay, I get you. You never know, they might have to.
We just gave $8,000 for my moms. Come on.
I'll give $8,000. I'm going to be in it for a while.
They're pretty fucking expensive.
Yeah, and the problem is, is they're never going to go out of business.
No, they're not. Unless everybody goes to get cremated, which a lot of people are doing.
A lot of people are doing it because, you know, I understand that they don't want to take up land.
And also, they don't want to just sit there and rot. It's just like, burn me up from the start and just throw me somewhere.
So, all right. High school teacher reportedly identifies as cat. Well, the only thing I gotta say about cremation is some ethnic groups and types of people, they do not allow that.
They believe that. Right. Yeah. So there always will be a need for coffins. But anyhow, I'll move on from there.
High school teacher reportedly identifies as a cat, licks hands, hisses at students.
Parents have expressed their concern at a Queensland high. All this stuff is in Britain.
At a Queensland high school teacher who has reportedly been referring to themselves as a cat, allegedly hissing at students and licking the back of their hands during class.
The teacher who works at Marsden State High School in Logan City, south of Brisbane, OK, Australia, has reportedly asked students, it wasn't UK, it was Australia. OK.
Has reportedly asked students to call her Miss Purr.
Multiple parents have claimed on social media.
Photos and short videos first published by the Courier Mail shows the teacher wearing a cat ear headband and leotard with the word purr on it while in front of a classroom.
She forces the children to call her Miss Purr and cat screeches and growls when they don't listen.
One relative alleged in comments on Facebook.
She sits in class and licks her hands. It's absolutely disgusting.
What would be done about this?
News.com AU would stand. No, no, no, that's cool. Go ahead. Go ahead. What did you say now?
No, I don't. I just said that would be.
That would not be disgusting. Anyway.
Well, OK, we can get into that a little bit later. I hear we're going to have to finish the story.
News.com AU, which is Australia, has contacted Marsden State High School for comment.
The same relative told the Courier Mail that she was confused by the teacher's behavior and expected the school had been inundated with complaints.
I myself would like answers. It all could be innocent as I know a lot of kids that can be overly dramatic, she said.
On the same Facebook post, one mother alleged that the teacher made her daughter purr for a pencil eraser.
OK.
OK, yeah, that's cool.
I think that they have a very good right.
That's borderline there. That's borderline there.
Yes, I would agree. I think that that's taken it too far.
Yeah, don't post it on the kids.
Yes. And another thing is it's like anything, anything that is that could interfere with the child's growing, I think should not be allowed.
And that is referring to yourself being a teacher as a cat.
I'm sorry, but you're obviously not a cat.
You're a human being. So therefore, I think you should not be allowed to make the children believe you're a cat when you are obviously not.
Get mad at me or whatever. That's my fucking opinion. And it's not changing.
Robin, go ahead. You got something to say?
I think she's watching too much porn.
Maybe so.
Yeah, that's yeah, too much porn.
Oh, OK. So you're saying she's being a pussy. Is that what you're saying?
She's getting in that freaky shit.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, the niche. Yeah, the niche. Yeah.
The kinky niches. Is that what that is?
Yeah.
Oh, OK. People that can't get off unless they are like in in cat leotards and hats that ears. OK. All right. Well, whatever.
That's what I'm saying.
That's my point. No, me too. That's what I say. They'll do it around children. You can do it all you want. I don't care.
As long as it's consenting adults, that's fine with me.
You just don't bring it around the children. Yeah, do it in the teachers' lounge, not the children.
Yeah, make the other teachers play with you. Whatever. But leave the kids out.
All right, Rob, we turn to you if you want to keep this shit show going.
OK. When given the green light to write a script with the backing of studio executives.
So let's restore one called one old for all from green to play Ivan Drago and face Rocky Balboa again.
Hmm.
In the last rocky.
Well, no, this is they were going to make a rocky seven.
OK, is that OK? Go ahead.
They were. And this was this was the best of Stallone's plan for Rocky seven was to call up dog longer.
OK.
In a tongue in cheek Instagram post alone revealed how the pair trained together during filming for Rocky four in the mid 1980s.
During filming Stallone stated that Drago longer and Apollo Creek played by Cole Withers once got into it for real.
Yeah, the Rocky Balboa and Drago should participate in a veterans return match.
Enjoying training together a week later, we were eating the hell out of each other, said Stallone.
I've done a lot of movie fights, but I believe this is the best boxing fight in the history of cinema.
OK, well, for a very long time, great. OK, Drago is a powerhouse.
I remember Drago and Creed got into an angry shoving match for real between rounds.
Well, go angle or you shoved him hard in the chest and he did him into the corner.
Apollo wanted no part of it. He left the way I don't blame.
Yeah, I want a rematch. I'll bring my wheelchair or you could bring yours and maybe an oxygen can if it goes past one round.
Ask Mike Tyson.
Yeah, they got it goes into different stories.
Yeah, they're. I mean, he was given great like the right script.
Backing the studio, I guess they're not going to do it.
OK, so there's no Rocky seven now.
OK, actually, the plans have been settled.
Yeah, damn it.
Well, yeah, they were going to have a John.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to dry jack you there.
I thought there's going to be a Rocky seven and we were going to go see.
So, all right. Well, nothing I can do about that.
Sorry, John. Maybe I'll wear a shirt and just go through all the Rocky movies one day at home.
There you go. There we go. Good compromise.
All right. OK, I can't seem up on the new Apollo.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? That's right.
And also the Creed series that came for Rocky to also.
Yeah. OK, let's see.
I'm trying to figure out which one do I want to do here.
Do you want to hear Chick-fil-A's new stuff that they're bringing back?
Or do you want to hear about how a canal is turned a different color?
Let's go to canal. OK.
All right. This water is raising a red flag.
A canal in Argentina mysteriously turned bright red on Thursday,
alarming residents who were woken up by its strong odor.
The smell woke us up in the daytime when we looked at the side of the river.
It was completely red, all stained.
El Venda resident Maria Velosiosus told AFP it looked like a river covered in blood.
It's horrible.
Water samples have been taken from the Sundae Canal, located in a suburb of Benas Ares.
Benas Ares to determine that I can never say that right.
Benas Ares, I think it's Benas Ares.
Buenos.
Buenos Ares, thank you.
Buenos Ares to determine the cause of the color change,
which could be an organic dye, according to the province's Ministry of the Environment.
Residents are blaming local leather and textile factories,
which are known to dump dye and chemical waste into the waterway,
which flows into the Rio de Plata between Argentina and Uruguay.
Other times it was yellow and was acidic,
and the smell made us sick even in the throat, a local named Silvia said.
So, okay, I guess they have a logical explanation, but man,
a blood red river that smells acidy and burns your throat, I don't think I'd like that.
No.
You got something you want to go into, or you want to wrap this boy up?
I'll show him you're a little tired, brother.
All right, brother, then we are going to say thank you, assholes.
Have a fantastic night.
Good night, assholes.
Oh, no, looks like the show's over, kids.
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.
Fear not, assholes, they'll be back invading your ear holes soon.