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And now it's time for...

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The Daily Deucebag Pledge.

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Here at Two Deucebags in a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.

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Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys, we can and will lie if it makes the story better.

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Two Deucebags and a Microphone.

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We Talk.

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Jesus.

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Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

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Every time you put on your tennis shoes, may the laces be tied in a knot.

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Have you ever wondered where something came from? Have you ever looked at something and said,

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Hey, I wonder what the origin of that is? Well, so have we. That's why we give you The Origin of...

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The Origin of Underwear. The earliest evidence of underwear dates back to 4400 BC in the Baderian culture of Egypt.

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Loincloths. The first underwear prototypes were loincloths, called shentii, made from woven materials like cotton and flax that are held up by a belt and worn at the waist.

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Panties. The earliest known underwear that resembles modern panties were made from linen and leather.

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Linen was used for everyday use while leather panties were used by women when they were menstruating.

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Hi all. This is Chicago. I am the most dangerous city in North America.

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You can't touch me.

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Oh yeah? This is Kansas City here. Hold my beer, bitch.

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Hey everybody, this is Two Douchebags and a Microphone. I am the Mark portion of this.

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And I am Rob.

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Okay, Rob, you know my Fall Staff sign. You see it on all the promos that I do. You know, getting ready to do the douchebags, watch out for your ear holes and all that, right?

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Yeah, yeah.

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Well, it burned out the other day. My Fall Staff sign burned out.

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Yeah, so I go into it, okay. And I forgot how well made. This is an antique, obviously. It's a very old sign, probably from the 40s, maybe early 50s.

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And anyhow, I was taking it apart to see what it needs. It needed a new fluorescent bulb in it, okay. So I get the fluorescent bulb.

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And I forgot how, it's number one, it's made, it's a union made sign. I saw the sticker on the side.

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Number two, that thing right there is almost like taking a car apart. That's how well stuff was made back then. And this is just a Fall Staff sign.

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I have like three different things I have to go through before I even get to the bulb.

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I mean, different layers and different little pieces that have been broke, the metal, the sheet metal been broke this way to hold this in and broke that way to hold that in.

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And it is one of the best built signs I've ever seen. That thing is something else.

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The signs today, you know, they're just like light and there's nothing to them. But I'm having a hell of a time trying to put that damn thing back together.

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I just spent an hour and every damn time I thought I had it back together. I look in there, I'm like, oh shit, the bulb's wrong.

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Oh shit, I forgot to attach this. Oh shit, I forgot. I mean, it's just, I will get it.

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But I just forgot how well built things were back then. And it's just like, it's a whole nother world, dude. I'm just like, the hell, you know.

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So I will get it, but I think it's going to thoroughly take another hour or so just to get it because every time I put it back together,

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the bulb came out because I had to move it around and go, oh yeah, I got to do this. Oh yeah, I got to do that. You know what I mean? Does that make sense?

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No, no. Yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about.

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Yeah. And I'm glad it's built well, but it's very frustrating.

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So it drives you nuts.

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Yeah, yeah. So I finally, I was using a screwdriver finally. I can't believe it. On a sign that should be this simple.

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Well, that's how you know it's good.

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Yeah, I had to get the screw gun out. I'm like, look, I'm tearing my fucking wrists up doing this thing.

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So anyhow, I'm glad it's built well and I will eventually get it and we'll be back up there looking fine.

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But until then, fuck, I'm having a hell of a time with it. So anyhow, how's your evening going?

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Oh, it's going good. Going good.

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Good. You were talking earlier off of the podcast, we were talking about meals and how you're snacking and everything.

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Yeah, I mean, I go from cooking for three to just cooking for me. I'm not used to it.

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So yeah, I'll make me a couple bologna sandwiches or whatever. It's not good. I got to start doing better.

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Like we talked about.

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I got to start doing meal planning again, but just make it smaller portions.

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Back in my single days, I had to just start going to making meals and getting those Tupperware containers that are sealable that you can put in the freezer.

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And then you pop them out and microwave them and that is as close as you can get to a good homemade meatloaf unless you go to the local restaurant.

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But if you're like me.

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Exactly. That's what we. Yeah, I mentioned that. I mean, we've got some good local restaurants right here. You know, why not?

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Yeah, you know, or area, you know.

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Yeah, I made a deal with myself when I was single. OK, two local restaurants a week and that's it.

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Yeah, yeah.

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Two times. Yeah, the rest of time it's on me. So anyhow, and then I finally got smart.

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My mom lived a block away from me, so I paid her to make my meals.

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Yeah, you know what? It worked out well. She loved doing it and she didn't want any money for it.

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I'm like, no, mom, that's that erases the point of me living away and not sponging off of you.

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You know, you don't make the most amount of money in the whole world. I know you're doing OK, but no, I have to pay you for this.

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So please respect it. And she did. She let me pay her for it.

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But it was good. Yeah, so it worked out well. And plus, I got her cooking another fucking 10 years in life.

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How well is that? You know, there you go. Yeah. And your mom was a damn good cook. Oh, gosh.

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Remember that Greek goulash? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Her goulash is to die for.

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Yeah, it wasn't regular goulash. What it is, it's Greek spaghetti is what it is. That's what it is.

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That's what it is. And anyhow, it's their equivalent to spaghetti. But man, that shit was just I'm telling you, I she can't really make it anymore.

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You know, she's older and, you know, she has some mobility and eye issues and stuff.

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And I tell you what, every now and then I wake up in a cold sweat. Oh, my God. I wish I had one more bowl of that.

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One more bowl. Right. And I can't do it. I tried to recreate it. I don't know what the hell.

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You know, you know, she's got to have her right there to show you. Yes.

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There is something she does that obviously I missed or by talking to her, I didn't catch.

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And I'm like, shit. Yeah. I'm like, I just can't do this. And she and she will point it out.

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I guarantee you. Yes. If she was at that level to where she could stand there and watch me. Oh, yeah.

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Yeah. Yeah. She would probably go Catholic nun on me and smack me in the hands with a ruler. No, no.

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No, you know, no, no, no. That's salt too much. No, no, no. That oregano. Just a little bit more.

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Nope, nope. You know, you went too far. Take some that out. I could see it right now.

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So the thing is, is a pinch and a dash to her or actually a measurement that she sees by her eyes when her eyes were good.

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Exactly. Us, it's a pinch and a dash. Her. It's like, no, no, no, no, no. You don't understand. You're not doing it right.

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So anyhow, yeah. So, yeah, I sympathize with you because I was in the same thing and I think the best thing you can do and number one,

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you do yourself a favor by buying in bulk like that, because if you buy single items like that, you're paying out the ass.

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You know, the convenience fee or whatever on just single servings or the small service of everything is twice as high.

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So anyhow, so getting into the podcast here, we all know that this year is rapidly coming to a conclusion, right?

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Yeah. Well, did you know that every year they have the top 10 oddest Guinness Book of World Records of the year?

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These are the oddest world records that took place within that year.

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And evidently you have to say if you want a world record on something, you have to submit it and go, this is what I have.

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Does this qualify for a world record? And it goes through some stuff and it goes through all of Guinness and they look through it and all this stuff.

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And they figure it out and see if there's anybody else doing that. You know what I mean?

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I think it's part interest, part oddity and part they're sure you're the only one.

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So anyhow, this is the top 10. They release this every year. And this is the top 10 of 2024 of the oddest top 10 Guinness Book of World Records.

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And so the first one, number 10, was the smallest washing machine.

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Sabees Sanjee of India broke the Guinness World Records of the smallest washing machine when his minute appliance was officially measured at 1.28 inches by 1.32 inches by 1.52 inches.

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What? Yes. Yes. It looks like, I'm not kidding you, you know a case a ring comes in, a ring case?

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Yeah. It looks like a ring case. And he has this little bastard working. You can look it up on YouTube.

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He threw on a little garment. He threw in a little detergent and the thing is washing it.

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And he took it out and it was clean. He had some sort of soil on it to prove his point.

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He went in there, he washed it. You can watch it on YouTube. Smallest washing machine, that's all it's called.

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So if you want to see, yeah, yeah. How he did it.

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I enjoyed stuff like this because my dad always had the Guinness Book of World Records books. So growing up, yeah that's what I did.

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I'd grab a book, you know. It fascinated me. I was grounded, couldn't go nowhere. I'd read Guinness, you know.

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Rob, I'm the same way, man. You and I are a lot alike on this nostalgia stuff and all that stuff.

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And you know, this goes along with it. You know, we're members of children, you know, this stuff going on.

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And I was the same way. It just fascinated me. You know, like the guy that could stand on his head the longest, you know, or whatever.

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Yeah.

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Okay, the next one on this list, number nine, is the largest building in the shape of a chicken.

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No kidding. No joke.

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I did not know that was a thing.

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It is now. Like I said, they have to submit it and Guinness has to go over it and all their talking heads have to look over it in the big wigs and go, okay, all right, this will qualify.

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So the largest building in the shape of a chicken is number nine. And it's a, it's at Campoo Hostin or Hostin, Campoo Hostin Highland Resort located in Nigros, Occidental.

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So I earned a world record when it happened. Okay. Overseas. Okay. Let's just say overseas.

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Well, also you mentioned camping area too. I could see something like that.

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Oh yeah, absolutely.

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For area like that. Yeah.

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Yeah, yeah. I do appreciate this too. I think that it's pretty interesting.

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So anyhow, the building is in the shape of a rooster and it stands at 114 feet and seven inches tall.

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Wow. And he uses it for his industry of local game foul.

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And this is making things associated with it, like maybe, you know, like the duck quacks or whatever, you know what I mean? The duck calls and also the blanks that they use, the dummies that they use out in the water.

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It sounds like this is what he does there and it's shaped, it's in the shape of a rooster.

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So this next one's right up our alley, Rob. Longest paddling journey by pumpkin boat.

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Now it's not the kind of paddling we normally dish out here at Two Douchebags of Microphone, but it's paddling by a pumpkin boat.

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Ashley, I think that just happened recently.

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It did. It did. Yep. I would say in the last two weeks it happened because I read it and then it was on here.

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I was thinking last year.

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No, this is this year.

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Oh, you're already beating. You're right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

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This is a brand new one. And this was out last year, too. Yeah.

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Okay. So Oregon man Gary Christensen hollowed out a pumpkin he dubbed by Punky Loafster and took out forty five point sixty seven mile journey down the Columbia River to break this record.

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Christensen, who was for strong winds and unstable waters during his journey, printed the words it's real on the side of the pumpkin to answer the most obvious question that might have been asked by curious onlookers.

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Yeah, you're thinking the one last year of the year before this guy beat that. Yeah. Oh, wow.

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Yeah. So interesting stuff.

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Okay. Number seven, the fastest 10 meters on a skateboard by a cat.

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Oh, my God.

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Baozhi, an American shorthair cat, belonged to Chinese man, Lecocino Li. He showed off his shredding skills by skateboarding 10 meters, 32.8 feet in 12.85 seconds. Li, a professional dog trainer, said he originally brought Zou Bozai, is his full name, home to help deal with the rodent problem.

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But he noticed the feline would watch intently while he was teaching dogs how to skateboard. So he started teaching Bozai to do the same tricks.

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Okay, love it. There's more. It goes on to more, but you guys got the yeah yeah yeah you got the gist of it. I'm pretty sure.

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This is the highest car bungee jump number six.

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Lauren Lasco, a professional stuntman and race car driver sat in the driver's seat of Nissan Quasar e-power vehicle when it was dropped from a crane at the height of 213 feet and three inches.

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The car bounced up and down at the edge of a bungee cord before safely coming to a rest and setting the new world record.

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So that that record was in existence, too. That wasn't one that they sent in and said, hey, is this a world record here? This is one that somebody already thought of and done.

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And this guy simply he just broke the record with the longest, the largest bungee jump in a car.

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So number five, most gaming consoles connected to a single TV. Now, if this isn't a waste of time, I don't know what is.

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So it's a more waste of time than me taking apart that false staff sign and spending an hour on it, not getting shit done.

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So Saudi Arabian gamer Abraham Al Nassar said something like, OK, some guy said he needed to employ the use of more than three, no, 30 RCA switchers and more than 12 HDMI switchers

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to hook up four hundred and forty four video game consoles up to his TV. Al Nassar said he needs to use an Excel spreadsheet to keep track of which switch boxes and converters he needs to use to play each console.

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Why? Why?

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But again, I go back to the false staff sign. I probably made I probably made better use of my time completely fucking up that false stuff, false staff sign than this guy did here.

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I'm just saying, why do you need that many consoles to run it one time?

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No, can't get the same thing done with a couple. I mean, you can only play a couple at a time, right?

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I thought just one.

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Well, I think it's just one. But let's say you have another one on another wall, then I would go with, you know.

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Yeah. Yeah.

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But OK. OK. You don't want over to how could you even keep track of you got a friend over? How many people are you going to have over on different walls?

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It's got to be a league or something or a club. I guess. Or maybe he simply just wanted to break the record and he thought it was funny.

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I don't know. Yeah, it could be. Yeah, it could be. You know, I mean, got more money.

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We used to run around White Castle naked because we thought it was funny. Right.

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Exactly. I rest my point. All right. That was funny. Yeah, that was funny. It was. Yes. Yep. Yep.

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Fastest motorized wheelbarrow. British mechanic. All right.

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Dylan Phillips hit the tarmac during straight liners speed week 2024 at Elvington Airfield in Yorkshire and took his custom built vehicle, a motorized wheelbarrow up to a top speed of fifty two point five eight miles.

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Almost my man. Yes.

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Dylan Phillips, you're my hero.

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You are my hero in a wheelbarrow, dude.

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That's the redneck shit there. I love it. You know that that beats a lawnmower all to hell.

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Yes. Yes. Beautiful work, Dylan. Beautiful work. We salute you here at To Do's Fags and Microphone.

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You are the greatest person that ever lived next to Jesus Christ.

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So, Phillips said getting the wheelbarrow up to speed is scary, but the real issue is slowing down. I bet it is as the unusual vehicle only has brakes on the front.

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Could you imagine that? How easy would that be to tip? You'd have to just tap the brakes over and over and over and you couldn't hit them for very long.

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Otherwise, you'd flip over.

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Yeah.

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Dylan Phillips, we salute you. Amazing work. Amazing. I'm getting teary eyed.

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Oh my God. I'm getting teary eyed. I hear trebles and angels on that one. I do too.

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Yes. Yes. You know, I mean, we need like a picture of him in the clouds with a wheelbarrow.

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Anyhow, most items identified by a parrot in three minutes.

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Apollo, a four-year-old African, African gray parrot, almost a gay parrot. It may be. We don't judge here. African gray parrot.

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Watch yourself.

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You know, whatever you want, gray parrot. That's fine.

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Yeah. Yeah.

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Yeah. Apollo, a four-year-old African gray parrot belonging to Florida resident Dalton and Victoria Mason was able to identify 12 objects presented to him by name in three minutes.

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The social media famous parrot who has 2.8 million followers on TikTok identified objects, including a book, a sock, a figure of Super Mario's nemesis Wario.

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Well, there you go. Not only could he identify stuff, he was a cool ass parrot.

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So yeah. Yeah.

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And finally, I don't know why this is number one. I don't consider this number one, but you know what? It's number one.

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Helen Williams, who previously earned the Guinness World Record for the longest handmade wig at 1,152 feet and five inches, earned her second title by assembling a wig measuring 11 feet, 11 inches wide, one inch wider than the Mini Cooper car is long.

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Williams, a professional wig maker in Nigeria, said she used more than 800 bundles of real hair to make her record breaking wig, which was then decorated 1000 rhinestones and put on display in her office.

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That is kind of cool, but I don't consider it better than a wheelbarrow. Do you?

187
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Now the wheelbarrow's got it.

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The motorized wheelbarrow is the shit.

189
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Yeah.

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Yeah. I still hear trumpets and angels and I'm getting teary eyed.

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Just talking about that right there might be story of the year.

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I think so.

193
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I think so.

194
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And I think we do an anti ass paddling on him.

195
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He can never get an ass paddling. I don't care what he does.

196
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He could not get an ass paddling because he did that.

197
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Is that agreed?

198
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Hell, you can't catch him.

199
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That's true.

200
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Old Sparky would have a hell of a time trying to paddle him.

201
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So that is the list.

202
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So Rob, we turn to you.

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All right.

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Two police departments from the Ozarks will be featured on national television in a new A&E series.

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This is cool.

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Yeah. It will feature KY3 regarding the death of Erd in a new show called Ozark Law, which premieres Wednesday, January 8th.

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A&E says the 10 episode series follows the Lake Ozark Police Department, which is over by Bagnall Dam.

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And the Osage Beach Police Department on their daily patrols around Lake of the Ozarks this summer, filming with the departments wrapped in early fall.

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We're fortunate to live in a place of natural beauty where people want to visit.

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And Osage said Osage Beach Police Chief Todd Davis.

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But when the population rapidly multiplies literally overnight, it presents unique challenges for our officers.

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The series shows how dedicated we are to serving the Osage Beach community.

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One episode will feature footage from KY3, which is out of Springfield, regarding the death of Officer Felicia Carson on January 31st.

214
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And you reported on you reported on this earlier in the podcast.

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This is her.

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Officer Carson was killed after joining a high speed pursuit when her patrol car began to skid and went off the road, hitting a tree.

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The patrol car caught fire.

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According to the city of Osage Beach, the production company Lucky Eight approached both departments in early 2024, asking to show the officers.

219
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OK, now I've read in another in another report that they went and asked in April and her accident happened August 31st.

220
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Well, I was listening to the local radio station this morning.

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Ninety three five rocks out of Osage Beach, which we have a lot of listeners in Osage Beach.

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Thank you, guys.

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Yeah.

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I mean, we got a shit ton of listeners in Osage Beach.

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So thank you.

226
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Anyhow, go ahead.

227
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I'm going to start.

228
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I want to start wearing my Rob Redshirt more often.

229
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You need to go to go to our RSS.

230
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Man, that'd be cool.

231
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Go to Osage Beach.

232
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And on ninety three five, they read a report that said that one of the film crews was just ahead of her when that accident happened.

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No shit.

234
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Oh, man.

235
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They were ahead. They were ahead of her filming everything else when her car wrecked. So I don't I doubt if they got footage except for maybe.

236
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Once they got stopped, you know, I don't know, but I doubt if they will show that on national TV.

237
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Yeah, probably not.

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I'm trying to figure.

239
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Yeah.

240
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I mean, well, the family wouldn't want that.

241
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Well, yeah, yeah, that's something you really they're going to have to be very delicate.

242
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But you know what?

243
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They will. They will.

244
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You know, they know the rules.

245
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They know, you know, they know it more than we do.

246
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So what they're going to do is they're going to pay tribute to her, which they need to.

247
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Yeah, she's a hero.

248
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She is a hero bonafide.

249
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And I think it's awesome that they're going to pay tribute to her and she should not be forgotten.

250
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That's for sure.

251
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And the way it looks, the little punk's going to do quite a bit of time.

252
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Good. Good.

253
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Yes, they have him on serious charges.

254
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So.

255
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Very cool, man.

256
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Thank you, Rob.

257
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Let's go ahead and take our first break.

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And I'm going to come back with some emails that sound good.

259
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That sounds good.

260
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That's what's going to happen.

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I do too.

262
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And there's some, you know, I'll just wait.

263
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Be right back.

264
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Oh, Lord, that man just saw a puppy in half.

265
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Hey there.

266
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Don't worry.

267
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I have a clown nose.

268
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Oh, no, that drunk guy just hit my child.

269
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It's OK.

270
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I have a clown nose.

271
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Clown nose.

272
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Just put one on and you can do anything.

273
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Want to run for office?

274
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Murder people in public?

275
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Just grab a clown nose and bam, everyone laughs.

276
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Clown noses are sold at gag stores online and pedophile conventions.

277
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Grab one today and make magic happen.

278
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This is the origin of two douchebags and microphone.

279
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It all started a couple of years ago when Topher and I realized we can annoy people really easily at will.

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We decided to take it a little further and start a podcast to try to annoy more people at a much larger level.

281
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It works so well, we brought our annoying friend Rob in for the whole gig.

282
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So now you have three horrible podcasts out of one horrible podcast.

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You're welcome, America.

284
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Harambe used to listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheap Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder.

285
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Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheap Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder anymore.

286
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You might ask why Harambe never listens to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheap Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder.

287
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Well, it's because Harambe is dead.

288
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Senselessly murdered because some idiot did not watch her child properly while looking on her phone.

289
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Sadly, Harambe does not listen to our original show, Two Dip Shits and a Cheap Radio Shack Realistic Tape Recorder, or any other show anymore.

290
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Sorry, Harambe.

291
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Two douchebags in a microphone invade your ear holes and...

292
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Hey! Who took a dump in the cooler?

293
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,000
Next up, Things Overheard in Hell.

294
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Hurry up. King Jong Un is playing Santa at the mall again this year. Yay!

295
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Two douchebags in a microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.

296
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We offer you...

297
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First world problems.

298
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Dammit!

299
00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:06,000
I can't decide between nachos, chili, or wings for the game tonight.

300
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:10,000
This is bullshit. I should not have to make decisions like this.

301
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:19,000
Hello. This is Satan. You might know me from my pet name, Inflation.

302
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I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than listening to two douchebags in a microphone by a nice warm fire at night.

303
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:40,000
I sit there and I reflect on all the souls I burned that day. Enjoy.

304
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:55,000
Two douchebags in a microphone! I'm Mark.

305
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And I'm Rob.

306
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Rob, real quick. I got a report. I got a report. A fallen soldier in the two douchebags in a microphone podcast army.

307
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It is my neon fuck-off sign. It has appeared to have burnt out.

308
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I'm very sad by this unfortunate event that occurred.

309
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I plan on getting another one, but we're going to do a proper salute to it on another podcast.

310
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Fuck-off sign, you did us so well for so long. We salute you and thank you for your service.

311
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:35,000
For telling countless people to fuck off without me having to say it.

312
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And that reminds me, I need to get my Showtime sign home.

313
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You gotta get what?

314
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,000
My Showtime sign home.

315
00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:48,000
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yep.

316
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:55,000
Yeah, that's for the Duck Pline Studio and this is the Talk is Cheap Studio and Topher's is the No Filter Studio.

317
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So there you go. All these studios. That's why you get all these crazy podcasts.

318
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And there may be more coming. And we have a sponsor coming up. So ha ha.

319
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Yep, yep. There's some people right now going, fuck. Why would someone pay them? They're going to stay around forever now.

320
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So, all right. Mark, this is emails. So we're going to go to it. So this is emails real quick.

321
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Mark, did you tell someone to eat a bowl of unsweetened shit flakes with a fork?

322
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That just killed me. Thanks. Ronnie and Tulsa. Did I?

323
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:41,000
I wouldn't put it past you. I would not put it past you. That sounds like something you would have said back then.

324
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:45,000
I do say unsweetened. You probably say that today.

325
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:49,000
No, he's talking about the podcast. This is Ronnie and Tulsa that said that.

326
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:53,000
He said, did you did you tell someone to eat a bowl of unsweetened shit flakes with a fork?

327
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:57,000
That just killed me. Thanks. Ronnie and Tulsa.

328
00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:01,000
Yeah, I do. I do occasionally tell people to eat a bowl of shit flakes.

329
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:06,000
I added unsweetened in there, I guess, for in a fork just for extra flavor.

330
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:13,000
So, yeah, I don't remember doing it, but yeah, I don't doubt I did that at all.

331
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:21,000
So I'm glad you liked it. So, anyhow, I think it was during an email.

332
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:26,000
I think someone was doing the usual, you guys suck. What?

333
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:32,000
I think so. Yeah. It may have been the dude about finger tapping.

334
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:35,000
It might have been. You know what? I think you're right. I think it was a finger tapping.

335
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:41,000
You went off on him hard, man. Oh, yeah. That fucker kept peppering me with stupid shit all week.

336
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:45,000
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyhow, I don't block him, though.

337
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:51,000
I let him waste his time. And every time one of his emails comes through, I delete it without even reading it.

338
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:55,000
So I just let him keep writing him. I'm not going to block him.

339
00:33:55,000 --> 00:34:00,000
Just let him keep writing. That way he can look. Oh, it went through. Oh, good.

340
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:07,000
No, it didn't. I deleted it before I even read it. So anyhow, this next one's for you, Rob.

341
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:11,000
Rob, how are you doing on sobriety? I'm really rooting for you, Wayne.

342
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:15,000
Wayne has asked about you quite a few times. His heart is real. His heart is true.

343
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:20,000
He cares about you and he wants you to do well. So there's the question, Rob.

344
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:26,000
Well, thank you, Wayne. And actually, thank you, everybody.

345
00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:32,000
You know how it is. It's day to day. Yeah. There's days I don't drink at all.

346
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:37,000
But when I do drink, I stick to a six pack.

347
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:43,000
You know, maybe a couple of days a week, you know, I think that's pretty damn good so far.

348
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:49,000
Yeah. Compared to where I was. Yeah. Yeah. You know what? Baby steps.

349
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:56,000
Well, not too much in five hours. Yeah. Rome was not built in one day. Keep at it, Rob.

350
00:34:56,000 --> 00:35:00,000
Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. All right.

351
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:05,000
And I'm old enough. I don't want to put my body in shock. So I'm weaning myself off.

352
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:09,000
Look, you're doing fine. Don't question it. Just keep doing what you're doing, Rob.

353
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:13,000
Don't get detoured or distracted. Just keep doing what you're doing. You're doing fine.

354
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:17,000
I'm not. I'm not. OK, good.

355
00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:21,000
OK, let's see now. The next one.

356
00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:27,000
All you pod host Rob Topher Mark, would you guys try the mayo drink?

357
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:33,000
Tamra in Kansas City, Kansas? No. Hell no.

358
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:40,000
Fuck no. Nope. And I believe I believe Topher would say the same thing.

359
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:43,000
I'm pretty sure he would say the same thing. You know, better than I do.

360
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:47,000
Yeah, he would. Yeah, he would not like that either.

361
00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:52,000
That sounds completely disgusting. And whoever did it is an idiot.

362
00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:54,000
Well, I mean, I guess they do it over in Japan.

363
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:56,000
So, you know what? Maybe they have different tastes or whatever.

364
00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:00,000
I can tell you right now, I would never have an interest in that drink ever.

365
00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:06,000
So the next one Topher, could you please talk some sense into Mark

366
00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:10,000
and have him do a different intro to the music creeps? It sucks.

367
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:16,000
William and Elgin. Elgin, Chicago area, right? I believe so.

368
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:19,000
Yeah, yeah, I'm guessing Illinois. Yeah.

369
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:23,000
Yeah. We have a lot of listeners up there. And thank you, William.

370
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:28,000
No, we're going to keep doing that. Sorry.

371
00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:31,000
Sorry, I don't have enough load in that show.

372
00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:35,000
Here's what you do, William and Elgin. Here's what you do.

373
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:38,000
Just go through the first part of it real quick. It's a podcast.

374
00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:40,000
You can just take that little needle and go tink.

375
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:43,000
Go past the first minute. You won't hear it. There you go.

376
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:45,000
Back forward, yeah. Yeah.

377
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:48,000
And all the other people that hate it will still hear it.

378
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:56,000
So I don't think there's one person that likes it, which means we're going to keep doing it.

379
00:36:56,000 --> 00:37:02,000
OK. And finally, the podcast is supposed to be kind of like a morning radio show live.

380
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:05,000
That's the description. Yeah, that's what I put on RSS.

381
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:10,000
That's what we are trying to do. Of course, we're very primitive.

382
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:12,000
We're not as talented. And we know all this.

383
00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:14,000
We're just doing our version of it as a salute to it.

384
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:18,000
And we think that stuff like this needs to exist as an outlet.

385
00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:20,000
Not everything has to be politics.

386
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:26,000
And it's more the content. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. More the content.

387
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:29,000
Not everything has to be politics. Not everything has to be news.

388
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,000
Not everything has to be serious.

389
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:36,000
Every now and then you hear it. You need to hear a good dick joke. And that's what we're here for.

390
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:42,000
So anyhow, I went on to say, well, if that's the case, now we know why that type of show isn't around anymore.

391
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:47,000
Clint in Clarksville, Arkansas. Clint, number one, I get to Clarksville pretty fucking easily.

392
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:53,000
So back it down, bitch. I know where Clarksville is. I used to live close to it.

393
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,000
So Clint, come on, bitch.

394
00:37:55,000 --> 00:38:04,000
You know that on the main drag there that like fucking Rusty's Cars or something we can meet there.

395
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:08,000
There we go. So, okay. Well, okay.

396
00:38:08,000 --> 00:38:12,000
Here is my official rebuttal to Clint.

397
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:17,000
Okay, Clint, the truth is that idiots like you have absolutely no capital to work with.

398
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:19,000
That's why they're no longer around.

399
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:26,000
To try to make a soft minded underachiever by anything over five bucks is simply not accomplishable.

400
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:32,000
So Clint, the next time we will do a podcast just for you, it will be grunts, clicks and drooling.

401
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:35,000
I'm sure you'll enjoy that one.

402
00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:41,000
Once again, eat a bowl of unsweetened shit flakes with a spatula.

403
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:45,000
Now go back to scratching your under folds.

404
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:49,000
And that's it. That's the that is emails.

405
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:54,000
Yeah. Yeah. You forget we grew up with shitty radio stations.

406
00:38:54,000 --> 00:39:01,000
Yes. The guy I hear, you know, they do what they think is going to get under your skin, right?

407
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:09,000
Yeah. You know, I said exactly what he said, but I would like to remind him that we can say anything, anything.

408
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:13,000
We can make it sound any way and he can't touch it. He can't get on this.

409
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:18,000
The worst he could do is start another podcast and bash us and try to like get to us or something.

410
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:21,000
But the thing is, is this right here, I could say whatever.

411
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:26,000
I chose to go ahead and pull that one out and talk about it because it's true.

412
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:33,000
OK, number one, Clark's Clarksville, Arkansas, Arkansas is about a po-dunk little fucking mud hole.

413
00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:38,000
OK, and this guy is talking about what we like up here.

414
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:43,000
OK, so I think he's probably about 20 years behind anyhow.

415
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:49,000
So, you know, it goes back to this, Clint, don't listen.

416
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:52,000
Don't download us. That's simple.

417
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,000
So anyhow, you can not like it all you want.

418
00:39:55,000 --> 00:40:02,000
That's fine. But to try to motherfucker me with like four or five emails simply, it just doesn't work.

419
00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:05,000
I don't care. I'm going to keep doing this.

420
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:07,000
And I hope you keep listening and hating it.

421
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:12,000
I hope it burns your asshole up. So anyhow, Rob, we'll make you famous.

422
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:18,000
Yeah, we will. William in Clarksville, Rusty's Cars, two o'clock.

423
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:21,000
Two o'clock next Tuesday. I'm off next Tuesday.

424
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:24,000
Two o'clock. Rusty's Cars. I'm in a black Jeep.

425
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:31,000
Come on down. I'll smack you around for a couple hours and go home smoking a cigar laughing.

426
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,000
Unless you're really huge.

427
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:37,000
You could be one of those big hay balers and then you probably kick my ass.

428
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:44,000
But assuming you're not, I ain't going down there. Who gives a shit?

429
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:49,000
Anyhow, Rob, we turn to you. Please turn this bullshit around.

430
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:57,000
OK. Because of the hook, I did it all for the nookie.

431
00:40:57,000 --> 00:41:05,000
Fans mistakenly believe the song is more preoccupied with sex than it really is.

432
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:09,000
I thought that's what it meant.

433
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:20,000
Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst has pointed out that fans frequently misunderstand the lyrics of the band's 1999 hit Nookie.

434
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:36,000
Despite the song's chorus where Durst raps that he did it all for the nookie, people frequently overlook that the song could spurn less with sex than it is with love despite its title.

435
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:42,000
I thought it was about man ass. I guess not. No.

436
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:53,000
In a new interview with Daze, Durst was asked in 1999, you're doing it all for the nookie. What are you doing it for in 2025?

437
00:41:53,000 --> 00:42:02,000
Prompting him to explain his frustrations with how the song gets misinterpreted.

438
00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:11,000
The funny thing about that, though, nobody listened to the story in Nookie. They just listened to the catchphrase.

439
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:26,000
Well, the song has so much aggression, I think that you're forced to skip over whatever it might have meant just by the whole outline of the song in everybody's defense. But go ahead.

440
00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:41,000
And he goes on to say, it's like when I say rage against the machine, they listen to fuck you. I won't do what you tell me. They don't listen to the rest of it.

441
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,000
Nookie. Yeah.

442
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:44,000
Huh?

443
00:42:44,000 --> 00:42:46,000
I said, yeah, that's a good point.

444
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:49,000
Go ahead. I'm sorry.

445
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:59,000
Nookie, the first time I had been intimate with someone, it happened later, and I was very much had over heels in love because of that.

446
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:09,000
And I was just that guy. I was very much a vulnerable person in that world, and I couldn't believe it. Believe it even happened.

447
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:21,000
So I fell in love, and then this person was sleeping with other people, and people would say, Fred, you're so upset. Why are you staying?

448
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:30,000
And I say, because we made love. And I found a different way to say it. I did it all for the Nookie.

449
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:39,000
I found it more fun. So what I did for them was to love.

450
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:45,000
You know what? I didn't think I was going to like this article because Fred Durst has a known moron.

451
00:43:45,000 --> 00:43:55,000
Actually, I understand what he's saying. I think we've all been there. That one girl that did that thing, whatever the fuck it was, she did that thing, and you couldn't put her down.

452
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:56,000
We've all been there.

453
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,000
Yeah.

454
00:43:57,000 --> 00:44:01,000
This is before you grew up and realized that you put her in her place.

455
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:10,000
You know, okay, that was a ho, and I was stupid. Now it's easy to look back and do that. But back then, when you're in the middle of it, you can't.

456
00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:17,000
It's simply impossible for a young man to be like, okay, she was just a bang. That's it. I need to move on. No.

457
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:25,000
She does whatever that thing is that drives you nuts. She figured you out. She infiltrated. She got you, and you're toast. That's it.

458
00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:31,000
So you know what? I like that, Fred Durst. I actually agree with him on one thing. That's true.

459
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:35,000
Wow. You got any more on that?

460
00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:37,000
No, that's all I had on that one, brother.

461
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:45,000
Wow, dude. That was really good because I would have never guessed that would have you.

462
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:55,000
No, I would not have either, and I agree. I mean, like we have said, the older you get, the more you listen to songs and get into them.

463
00:44:55,000 --> 00:45:03,000
And I heard that song today after I picked this story. I was like, hell yeah, I see it now.

464
00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:17,000
Everybody, any male our age, younger, a little bit older, we all understand where Fred Durst was coming from because we've all been a victim of this.

465
00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:24,000
Like you said, you've got to listen to other than the catchphrase. You've got to listen to the rest of the song.

466
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:31,000
It is a really good catchphrase because who didn't run around going, the nookie, the nookie? I mean, it is very catchy.

467
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:36,000
So I get it. I get it 100 percent why he did the song like that.

468
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:46,000
And wow, I just kind of corrected myself thinking, you know what, you were wrong. That's okay. I get it.

469
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:51,000
All right. Wow. Okay. Thank you, Rob.

470
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:57,000
Okay. Since we're on the year end stuff, a lot of people are traveling, right?

471
00:45:57,000 --> 00:46:03,000
A lot of airplanes, stuff like that, what have you. So, okay.

472
00:46:03,000 --> 00:46:11,000
So when people, when travelers finally get to go on a trip, here is a list of what annoys travelers the most.

473
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:19,000
And I'm on board with probably 100 percent of them, maybe not quite in that order, but I'd see it. I see what they're saying.

474
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:26,000
Having a cough or cold and not wearing a mask is 27 percent of people hate that, including me.

475
00:46:26,000 --> 00:46:35,000
When you can feel the little wet drops from their sneeze hit you in the back of the head, I want to turn around and smack them in the fucking face.

476
00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:39,000
I've had that happen before. It's like, dude, I don't need your fucking germs.

477
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:44,000
And why don't you wear something over that face if you're going to be snotting all over me?

478
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:52,000
So I agree with that. And in a little bitty plane, yeah, I'm not like afraid of COVID or anything like that.

479
00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:57,000
You know, what I am is, is I don't want the inconvenience and the horrible feeling of catching a cold.

480
00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:03,000
It sucks. Just because some moron couldn't put something over their face.

481
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:09,000
So I agree with that 100 percent. I mean, if you're sick, if I'm sick, I try to wear a mask for the people around me.

482
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:14,000
It may not cut it down 100 percent, but at least it's courteous and you're trying to do something about it,

483
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:19,000
except like people that you work with or something going around coughing all over you.

484
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:28,000
So I agree with that 100 percent. So the next one, and I agree with this even more, and this may be more of my pet peeve.

485
00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:35,000
And you tell me if you feel the same way, Rob, not using headphones to listen to music 15 percent.

486
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:40,000
I would think I'd be more. I hate people's noise intruding my ears.

487
00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:46,000
And I do a podcast. I hate that. At work in the lunch break, someone's watching something saying,

488
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:54,000
and I'm like, I want to fucking hear this. I mean, you see where I work, it's a little different.

489
00:47:54,000 --> 00:48:00,000
We're a big steel shop machines running. I got to have mine loud just so I could hear it.

490
00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:04,000
Well, that's different. You're you got background noise. Go ahead.

491
00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:09,000
When I walk out of work, my ear pod goes in. Yeah.

492
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:15,000
You don't sit there and listen to some loud, kooky zany bullshit that's infiltrating everybody's airspace.

493
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:18,000
I just want to take the phone and smash against the wall.

494
00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:23,000
And people do that. That is a bigger pet peeve to me than someone sneezing on the back of your head.

495
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:28,000
That's just one thing that gets me. And I hate it. OK.

496
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:31,000
Kicking or pulling the back of the seat is 15 percent.

497
00:48:31,000 --> 00:48:40,000
Also, I think I would register that higher. That would be right below the loud whatever.

498
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:45,000
That sucks. Someone kicking and pulling your seat is very uncomfortable.

499
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:53,000
It's annoying as fuck. And what's more annoying is is the lack of consideration, whether it's children or not.

500
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:57,000
If it's children, they the parents should say, hey, you don't do that.

501
00:48:57,000 --> 00:49:02,000
There's someone up there and you were directly affected on with your bullshit.

502
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:06,000
So stop. You know, I hear this bargaining shit too much.

503
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:10,000
Jeffy, could you please not mind to stop that?

504
00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:14,000
And he's like, no, well, I couldn't get him to stop. Yeah, you could get him to stop.

505
00:49:14,000 --> 00:49:17,000
Number one, be a fucking parent and not his buddy.

506
00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:19,000
You tell him, Jeffy, you fucking stop that.

507
00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:23,000
And if you don't, when we get off of here, you're going to pay the price.

508
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:28,000
Plain and simple. Not. Oh, come on. Could you please? No, I hate that shit.

509
00:49:28,000 --> 00:49:31,000
It's like, tell the fucking kid what he's going to do. He's your kid.

510
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:36,000
You know, so anyhow. All right. Next one.

511
00:49:36,000 --> 00:49:42,000
Reclining without checking or during meals. Yeah. Yeah.

512
00:49:42,000 --> 00:49:47,000
I mean, I usually have people around me consider and they go, do you mind if I recline this back a little bit?

513
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:52,000
And usually I'm like, that's fine. I don't mind. And if I do it, I ask why not?

514
00:49:52,000 --> 00:49:57,000
Yeah. I always ask, though. I don't just like, yeah. And then there I am.

515
00:49:57,000 --> 00:50:02,000
You know, but most people comply and they're fine. They're like, yeah, yeah, no problem, man.

516
00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:06,000
You know, and usually you can get somewhat of a friendly little gesture from them.

517
00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:14,000
And, you know, you know, they're cool. And and it makes just everything much easier on a flight.

518
00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:20,000
This one. So true. Standing up as soon as the flight lands.

519
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:29,000
But I have some stipulations. People that have a bad back and knees have to stand up if it's a long flight because you're so cramped.

520
00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:34,000
You are hurting and you're literally moving around constantly trying to get it not to hurt.

521
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:39,000
But if someone's just doing it because they think they're going to get a half second on the other people.

522
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:45,000
No. But if they're doing it because they legitimately hurt and I can tell by the way they're walking and the way they move around,

523
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:50,000
then I don't have any problems with it because I get it because I'm the same way.

524
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:56,000
This next one I agree with a lot, but it's not nearly my higher highest is hogging the middle armrest.

525
00:50:56,000 --> 00:51:03,000
That's six percent of people. To me, that's about right, because usually I don't have a problem with the middle armrest.

526
00:51:03,000 --> 00:51:06,000
If someone wants it, it doesn't really bother me that bad. It's like, go for it.

527
00:51:06,000 --> 00:51:09,000
Whatever, you know, little things like that.

528
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:14,000
I try not to let affect me too much because it just fucks everything up.

529
00:51:14,000 --> 00:51:20,000
Next one, six percent also taking their shoes off.

530
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:24,000
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

531
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:30,000
Yeah. Very, very rude and usually smelly. They may not think it smells, but it does.

532
00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:34,000
So absolutely 100 percent.

533
00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:41,000
This next one, absolutely. And they need to do the airlines in Newport need to do more about this.

534
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:45,000
Crowding the boarding area before boarding six percent.

535
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:49,000
But I think it should be 90 percent because that is bullshit.

536
00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:52,000
People jump up there when they're not supposed to go in.

537
00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:58,000
You know, they know they've got another 15 minutes before they board and they're just sitting there clogging it up.

538
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:05,000
And it's like, look, I'm in my area. You guys, you'll get your turn in D or whatever, D or E or whatever.

539
00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:08,000
Just go back there and wait. You're not getting in before me.

540
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:13,000
They're checking tickets. So why do you have to stand up here near me when it's my turn to go in there?

541
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,000
And all you're doing is getting in the way.

542
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:20,000
And then people constantly tell you from the airlines, could you move back just a little bit, sir?

543
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:25,000
You know, they need to just be like, all right, if you're not a part of this, you stay over there.

544
00:52:25,000 --> 00:52:31,000
And if not, then we're not going to board you. You do it or you don't get on. That's simple.

545
00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:34,000
So next one, number four.

546
00:52:34,000 --> 00:52:42,000
And I agree with this 100 percent because it drives me nuts to wear in strong perfume or cologne or lotion.

547
00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:45,000
Dude, some of that stuff gives me a flat out fucking headache.

548
00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:50,000
It's so strong and just not it. Not that pleasant to me.

549
00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:58,000
Do you get do you go through the same thing, Rob?

550
00:52:58,000 --> 00:53:01,000
Rob, you there?

551
00:53:01,000 --> 00:53:06,000
Did you mute?

552
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:10,000
Rob, did you mute?

553
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:13,000
All right. Hang on. Let me check in on this, everybody.

554
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:16,000
While I hit pause here, we're going to figure out what's going on.

555
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:19,000
All right. We seem to have our technical difficulties worked out.

556
00:53:19,000 --> 00:53:23,000
And I think it was on my end, but I don't know what happened still to this minute.

557
00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:25,000
I don't know.

558
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:29,000
OK. Let's see. Where were I? Oh, strong perfume.

559
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:32,000
Do you agree with that and clone?

560
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:40,000
Yes. Yeah, there's just some stuff that especially if you put too much of it on, it's going to turn my stomach.

561
00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:43,000
Yeah. Yeah. And also it gives me a headache.

562
00:53:43,000 --> 00:53:48,000
And also it wouldn't smell that bad if you didn't put on 30 fucking gallons of it.

563
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:54,000
Believe me, you don't need to put that. It's designed to where you put just a pinch on and it goes for most of the day.

564
00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:58,000
The stuff is designed for that. You don't need to like bathe in it.

565
00:53:58,000 --> 00:54:04,000
And if you bathe in it, it doesn't smell good anyhow. So I agree.

566
00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:08,000
Next. And I agree with this because I've had this happen before.

567
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:12,000
Someone trying to get to know you when you don't want to get to know anybody.

568
00:54:12,000 --> 00:54:15,000
All you want to do is go your destination, be left alone.

569
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:20,000
On my old work trips, there's always somebody I just wanted to decompress before I got to wherever.

570
00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:25,000
And usually it's a busy airport and all that shit. So I just leave me alone.

571
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:29,000
Talk into a fellow passenger who clearly doesn't want to engage. 3%.

572
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:33,000
I'm higher than that because I've been a victim of that before.

573
00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:35,000
And I'm not trying to be a dick.

574
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:40,000
The simple fact is, is I just want to be left alone because I got a full day of traveling ahead of me.

575
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:43,000
And especially if it's for work, if it's vacation, that's different.

576
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:48,000
I'll be a little bit easier. But when I used to travel for work, no, I could not stand that.

577
00:54:48,000 --> 00:54:53,000
All I wanted to do was be left alone that amount of time because I knew the rest of the day was going to be bullshit.

578
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:55,000
Going from this airport, going to there.

579
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:58,000
Getting a rented car, going to here, going to there.

580
00:54:58,000 --> 00:55:04,000
So what about you, Rob? You feel the same way or not so strong?

581
00:55:04,000 --> 00:55:08,000
No, I feel exactly the same way. I really do.

582
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:10,000
Okay.

583
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:21,000
Okay, so now the next thing of this traveler's quiz is, are you a window or aisle person?

584
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:28,000
Okay, so they found that a majority of fliers like to cozy up with a view in the window seat.

585
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:30,000
That includes me 53%.

586
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:36,000
While 46% prefer the ease of entry and exit provided by the aisle seat.

587
00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:38,000
Now, to me, it's okay.

588
00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:41,000
Here's why I view it, Rob, and you tell me if you think this is right or not.

589
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:45,000
Okay, if it's a long flight, I want an aisle seat even though I like to look out the window.

590
00:55:45,000 --> 00:55:49,000
And that's because I know at some point during that flight I'm going to have to piss.

591
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:55,000
I don't want to have to stick my ass in everybody's face trying to get across to piss.

592
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:56,000
Yeah.

593
00:55:56,000 --> 00:56:00,000
But if it's a short flight, if it's like an hour, even an hour and a half,

594
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:03,000
I'll take the window seat because I love the window seat.

595
00:56:03,000 --> 00:56:06,000
I like looking down and going, hey, oh, hey, there's Mississippi River.

596
00:56:06,000 --> 00:56:11,000
Oh, hey, there's Ohio River. Oh, look, there's the Rockies. I love that.

597
00:56:11,000 --> 00:56:15,000
You can usually identify what they are by, you know, about where you're at in the flight

598
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:20,000
and what you see down there, Salt Lake, you know, Great Lakes, you know,

599
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:23,000
all this stuff you can tell by looking down the ocean.

600
00:56:23,000 --> 00:56:27,000
So I would rather do that. But if it's too long a flight, I have to take an aisle seat

601
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:31,000
because I will have to piss at least once during that flight.

602
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:42,000
So next, as for when they would rather fly, 54% of respondents said they took aim to book

603
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:46,000
early morning departures, including me, but Val isn't on board with that,

604
00:56:46,000 --> 00:56:50,000
so I have to scale it back a little bit. If it was me, I would leave at five in the morning.

605
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:53,000
I would wake up at 2.30, get to the airport, leave at five in the morning.

606
00:56:53,000 --> 00:56:58,000
I'd be at my destination, especially a vacation, by nine o'clock usually.

607
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:04,000
And then you got that whole day to go do whatever. You check into that.

608
00:57:04,000 --> 00:57:06,000
And you got less people to deal with at that time.

609
00:57:06,000 --> 00:57:16,000
Yes. And also, if you're really polite, you can usually get into the hotel earlier.

610
00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:19,000
And if they charge you an extra $10, $20, so be it.

611
00:57:19,000 --> 00:57:22,000
You're still getting a hell of a deal, getting that extra time.

612
00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:27,000
You put all your stuff away. If you're in Florida, a lot of the places that I used to go,

613
00:57:27,000 --> 00:57:35,000
not so much now, but like Ocean Manor, Ocean Sky, the Hilton there on Los Olas,

614
00:57:35,000 --> 00:57:41,000
all these places there, they have a beach right there, and they have all the amenities right there.

615
00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:48,000
So you get there early, and you got all day to lay out, go to the ocean, go drink, sit in the pool, all this stuff.

616
00:57:48,000 --> 00:57:51,000
So I'm with that, especially when you're going on a cruise.

617
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:57,000
So you get a day before of relaxation, then you wake up, you jump on a boat, and relax even more.

618
00:57:57,000 --> 00:58:01,000
To me, that is fantastic, and that makes me want to go on a cruise right fucking now.

619
00:58:01,000 --> 00:58:06,000
But it's not until the end of April, so it's a little ways away.

620
00:58:06,000 --> 00:58:09,000
Anyhow, let's see.

621
00:58:09,000 --> 00:58:13,000
The survey found that post-pandemic rebound in travel isn't slowing down,

622
00:58:13,000 --> 00:58:21,000
with 54% of respondents indicating that they plan to take more international trips in 2024 when they did in 2023.

623
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:27,000
The main obstacles for travel are lack of time, 29%, and financial concerns, 25%.

624
00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:34,000
When asked whether they would rather get a $5,000 annual salary increase or two additional weeks of vacation,

625
00:58:34,000 --> 00:58:43,000
56% of respondents said they would rather have more time off, including me.

626
00:58:43,000 --> 00:58:51,000
I would love to go over to Europe, specifically the Mediterranean.

627
00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:56,000
Like I said, I have family over there I would like to see, but above that, I love the area, I love the food,

628
00:58:56,000 --> 00:59:00,000
I love everything. I don't want to live there, but I'd love to visit there.

629
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:06,000
I would love to go back, but man, those 14-hour flights, I just don't see doing that, Rob.

630
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:12,000
The way my back feels and my knees and everything, I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to do that.

631
00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:17,000
I mean, I can't walk for half of a day when I do that.

632
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:23,000
The 14 hours and the boredom and the only so much you can read and only so much you can listen to,

633
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:29,000
I mean, I used to not mind them, but now I despise 14-hour flights.

634
00:59:29,000 --> 00:59:33,000
Anything over two hours, I just despise.

635
00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:40,000
So anyhow, we will make it over there sometime, but it's probably not going to be very many times.

636
00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:46,000
I think I'm going to go over there one last time, see the people I want to see, go to the places I want to go,

637
00:59:46,000 --> 00:59:51,000
and maybe take a Mediterranean cruise while I'm over there, and then come back and call it good,

638
00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:56,000
and everything else is over on this side of the world. I think that's my plan. We'll see if it works.

639
00:59:56,000 --> 01:00:04,000
Anyhow, that is the end of that. There was more, but really, I think we got the point across on everything,

640
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:10,000
about how travelers feel, so Rob, be my guest. Oh no, we didn't take our second break yet, did we?

641
01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:11,000
No, we have not.

642
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:14,000
Let's take that and we're going to come back with some of your stuff. That sound good?

643
01:00:14,000 --> 01:00:16,000
And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.

644
01:00:16,000 --> 01:00:26,000
Coffee flavored water doesn't sound good, but that's exactly what coffee is.

645
01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:29,000
That is weird.

646
01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:38,000
They used to call it Jump-O-Leave until your mama got on it.

647
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:47,000
As much fun as an electric can opener to the scrotum, two douchebags in a microphone.

648
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:56,000
Jam X, what the hell happened? You were the generation of change.

649
01:00:56,000 --> 01:01:03,000
You never wanted to be one of them. At the field, spoke for you.

650
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:10,000
Hunk the man, hunk the system. What the hell happened?

651
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:18,000
The generation of angst, the generation of non-compliance, is now buying a boat.

652
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:28,000
You're really fed up until someone dangled a dollar near you. Great job, Xers. Everything's ruined.

653
01:01:28,000 --> 01:01:35,000
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

654
01:01:35,000 --> 01:01:40,000
Mate, your head's going to snap on every door and it's going to snap.

655
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:51,000
Oh shit, what's that over there? Oh no, it's Island of Horrible Jokes.

656
01:01:51,000 --> 01:01:59,000
Want to hear a joke about paper? It's terrible. It's horrible.

657
01:02:04,000 --> 01:02:10,000
You watched the news. It looks grim. Is this apocalypse inevitable?

658
01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:16,000
We suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand and have multiple mobile chargers.

659
01:02:16,000 --> 01:02:21,000
We have the purpose of our lives.

660
01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:25,000
Learn your soils. You will need drinking and bath water.

661
01:02:25,000 --> 01:02:31,000
You must build a reservoir. The key to hold water in the ground are the clays you have at its base.

662
01:02:31,000 --> 01:02:38,000
Research water purification methods and moral game will attract to the water as well.

663
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:44,000
The apocalypse just happened. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to go.

664
01:02:44,000 --> 01:02:48,000
We can tell you what you can eat.

665
01:02:48,000 --> 01:02:54,000
Elderberries can be a delicious and tasty treat in the wild.

666
01:02:54,000 --> 01:02:59,000
During the apocalypse, this can be a great go-to food because it is also medicinal.

667
01:02:59,000 --> 01:03:08,000
It helps with inflammation to headaches and also maybe you're sore from running from that radioactive antelope or whatever.

668
01:03:08,000 --> 01:03:14,000
Take some elderberries. Maybe you can run a little bit faster and get away from the damn thing.

669
01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:30,000
Two douchebags of microphone on Mark Gochieff's.

670
01:03:30,000 --> 01:03:34,000
I'm Mark, or I'm Rob Gochieff.

671
01:03:34,000 --> 01:03:38,000
I threw you off of that, didn't I?

672
01:03:38,000 --> 01:03:40,000
Yeah, you did.

673
01:03:40,000 --> 01:03:48,000
I was just reading an article while we were on break there that now they expect Mahomes to play.

674
01:03:48,000 --> 01:03:54,000
But I think we can beat the Texans with our defense and Carson Wentz and Mahomes needs to rest.

675
01:03:54,000 --> 01:03:58,000
So we'll see what happens. Anyhow, go ahead. It's going to be an interesting game.

676
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:02,000
Yeah, we have some games to play with there.

677
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:06,000
We have to win two out of three and we can win two out of three.

678
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:11,000
I think we can do one of them at least with Carson Wentz with our defense being as good as it is.

679
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:15,000
If we've got to get Mahomes a week off, go for it.

680
01:04:15,000 --> 01:04:22,000
But I can tell you right now from what I read, he was a full participant in practice today and he plans to be the rest of the week.

681
01:04:22,000 --> 01:04:25,000
I guarantee you he's starting. So anyhow.

682
01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:26,000
Of course.

683
01:04:26,000 --> 01:04:30,000
I mean, you're not going to get him out of there. He just won't.

684
01:04:30,000 --> 01:04:34,000
So anyhow, for good or worse, I think that's what's going on.

685
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:38,000
So anyhow, go ahead, Rob, please.

686
01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:40,000
OK.

687
01:04:40,000 --> 01:04:43,000
This came out December 12th, by the way.

688
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:45,000
OK.

689
01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:49,000
It today hasn't been strange enough yet.

690
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:52,000
I submit this to you.

691
01:04:52,000 --> 01:05:03,000
This video shared with us by a bystander showing police in Quincy, Illinois, chasing a stolen FedEx truck across town.

692
01:05:03,000 --> 01:05:05,000
OK.

693
01:05:05,000 --> 01:05:07,000
Big. Yeah.

694
01:05:07,000 --> 01:05:26,000
Big thank you to Garrett Glasscock of LaBelle, Missouri, who was kind enough to allow us to share video he captured Thursday of a FedEx truck that was reported stolen, which was being followed by numerous police vehicles.

695
01:05:26,000 --> 01:05:33,000
The pursuit started in Illinois, but ended in Missouri, according to the Marion County Sheriff's Department.

696
01:05:33,000 --> 01:05:35,000
Huh.

697
01:05:35,000 --> 01:05:36,000
OK.

698
01:05:36,000 --> 01:05:37,000
I understand.

699
01:05:37,000 --> 01:05:50,000
My understanding of this is that the pursuit started in Quincy, but ended in Palmyra, Missouri, not long after.

700
01:05:50,000 --> 01:05:55,000
And I believe this video was actually captured on the Missouri side of the chase.

701
01:05:55,000 --> 01:06:00,000
And this video they're talking about is on YouTube.

702
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:01,000
Oh, cool.

703
01:06:01,000 --> 01:06:02,000
I have to look at it.

704
01:06:02,000 --> 01:06:05,000
Yeah.

705
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:08,000
Yeah, I actually watched it.

706
01:06:08,000 --> 01:06:10,000
OK.

707
01:06:10,000 --> 01:06:14,000
For one, dumbass of the week.

708
01:06:14,000 --> 01:06:18,000
OK.

709
01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:25,000
Do you really think you're going to steal a big ass FedEx truck and get away?

710
01:06:25,000 --> 01:06:28,000
To me, that sounds like a teenager's dare.

711
01:06:28,000 --> 01:06:29,000
It's a billboard.

712
01:06:29,000 --> 01:06:30,000
Yeah.

713
01:06:30,000 --> 01:06:35,000
That sounds to me like a teenager's dare more than anything else.

714
01:06:35,000 --> 01:06:37,000
You know what I mean?

715
01:06:37,000 --> 01:06:39,000
Doesn't that sound like something like, oh, you'll never do that.

716
01:06:39,000 --> 01:06:41,000
And then the guy does it.

717
01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:42,000
You know what I mean?

718
01:06:42,000 --> 01:06:47,000
That just doesn't sound realistic that anyone thinks that they could get away with that.

719
01:06:47,000 --> 01:06:50,000
Yeah, or somebody it was really hard at.

720
01:06:50,000 --> 01:06:52,000
It could be that, yes.

721
01:06:52,000 --> 01:06:56,000
They lost their job and they got kids they need Christmas for.

722
01:06:56,000 --> 01:06:59,000
I hear stories like that all the time.

723
01:06:59,000 --> 01:07:08,000
I'll tell you what, especially down there at the lake, I've been there's been some reports out saying about people are increasingly going to poverty level because there are no jobs there.

724
01:07:08,000 --> 01:07:11,000
And then the casino got shot down.

725
01:07:11,000 --> 01:07:12,000
The casino, a lot of people.

726
01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:14,000
Yeah, the casino.

727
01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:20,000
A lot of people could have worked there and it could have helped some people out during the winter when there's nothing going on.

728
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:22,000
But they shot that down, too.

729
01:07:22,000 --> 01:07:24,000
And like they're talking about how a lot of people.

730
01:07:24,000 --> 01:07:25,000
OK.

731
01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:26,000
OK.

732
01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:27,000
OK.

733
01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:31,000
But living here, I also see the other side of that.

734
01:07:31,000 --> 01:07:35,000
OK.

735
01:07:35,000 --> 01:07:38,000
There are jobs.

736
01:07:38,000 --> 01:07:39,000
OK.

737
01:07:39,000 --> 01:07:41,000
People don't want them.

738
01:07:41,000 --> 01:07:42,000
I got you.

739
01:07:42,000 --> 01:07:44,000
Because they have to.

740
01:07:44,000 --> 01:07:48,000
We could use a couple people right now.

741
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:54,000
But we need people that actually want to work and show up and.

742
01:07:54,000 --> 01:07:57,000
Don't mind physical labor.

743
01:07:57,000 --> 01:08:01,000
There's not a whole lot of people like that from what I see anymore.

744
01:08:01,000 --> 01:08:07,000
People. Well, people down here, they're used to fast food restaurants and restaurant work.

745
01:08:07,000 --> 01:08:14,000
You know, they don't want to do the manufacturing and I say I do see both sides of that.

746
01:08:14,000 --> 01:08:18,000
You know what, Rob, that's fair because you are down there.

747
01:08:18,000 --> 01:08:20,000
And you would know more than I would.

748
01:08:20,000 --> 01:08:24,000
So right. OK, I get it. I get it.

749
01:08:24,000 --> 01:08:30,000
You know, I mean, and what I'm reading is someone wrote this out and are trying to make it seem like one way.

750
01:08:30,000 --> 01:08:33,000
We don't know what their agenda was or anything.

751
01:08:33,000 --> 01:08:39,000
So, you know, yeah, it could be very much.

752
01:08:39,000 --> 01:08:42,000
Very much, you know, just people not wanting to work.

753
01:08:42,000 --> 01:08:47,000
So anyhow, is there any more to that?

754
01:08:47,000 --> 01:08:48,000
No, that was it.

755
01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:54,000
OK, here's something that people down there could employ themselves on.

756
01:08:54,000 --> 01:09:06,000
People seeking unconventional relaxation message methods are shelling out hundreds of dollars for professional backscratchers, according to the Wall Street Wall Street Journal.

757
01:09:06,000 --> 01:09:10,000
So there you go. All you people down there don't want to build trailers.

758
01:09:10,000 --> 01:09:13,000
There you go. Be a backscratcher.

759
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:19,000
Tony George, a. Hey, that would probably go over pretty good down here, honestly.

760
01:09:19,000 --> 01:09:24,000
I see it on a summertime weekend. Yeah, I see it.

761
01:09:24,000 --> 01:09:28,000
Yeah, just watch that new TV show.

762
01:09:28,000 --> 01:09:32,000
Oh, yeah, like that, like that police chief said.

763
01:09:32,000 --> 01:09:39,000
You learn that town of Osage Beach is roughly five thousand.

764
01:09:39,000 --> 01:09:43,000
And in the summertime, you wake up on a Saturday.

765
01:09:43,000 --> 01:09:48,000
There's roughly one hundred thousand easily.

766
01:09:48,000 --> 01:09:52,000
You know what I mean? So, yeah, I mean, they got to be ready.

767
01:09:52,000 --> 01:09:56,000
It is the smallest town, big town cop situation.

768
01:09:56,000 --> 01:10:06,000
And I mean, because all these other ones, like they've grown so much that they actually do have a huge police force where Osage Beach is part time.

769
01:10:06,000 --> 01:10:09,000
During the winter, there's nothing going on.

770
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:12,000
So, you know, they can have a huge force all the time.

771
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:14,000
So they have to deal with what they have.

772
01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:20,000
And whenever all these people are there, they're probably very short staffed, I would imagine.

773
01:10:20,000 --> 01:10:28,000
Well, what also happens is we also have Camden County right here in Canton across the bridge.

774
01:10:28,000 --> 01:10:35,000
Yeah. And also we have highway patrol that runs out of Jeff City.

775
01:10:35,000 --> 01:10:38,000
Oh, they just come down. Yeah, that's right. They just go south.

776
01:10:38,000 --> 01:10:43,000
Yeah. And they actually use Camden County as a base.

777
01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:53,000
I mean, what they do while they're on route, if they pick somebody up or whatever, they take them to Camden County.

778
01:10:53,000 --> 01:10:55,000
They sit there to do the work.

779
01:10:55,000 --> 01:10:58,000
And they figure out what happens to them when they're processed.

780
01:10:58,000 --> 01:11:03,000
OK. Well, they have a lot of backup law enforcement wise.

781
01:11:03,000 --> 01:11:05,000
OK, that's good.

782
01:11:05,000 --> 01:11:21,000
Tony George, the 55 year old owner of the Scratcher Girls in Miami, charges 130 an hour of scratching using her three inch manicured nails, raking them down her client's back, limbs, scalp and even insides of their ears.

783
01:11:21,000 --> 01:11:23,000
How much?

784
01:11:23,000 --> 01:11:27,000
One hundred and thirty an hour.

785
01:11:27,000 --> 01:11:30,000
And that's probably that's without a tip, I would bet.

786
01:11:30,000 --> 01:11:33,000
Oh, my God, that'd be worth it.

787
01:11:33,000 --> 01:11:37,000
I'll tell you what, back scratching is amazing, isn't it?

788
01:11:37,000 --> 01:11:41,000
I have not had my back scratched in ages.

789
01:11:41,000 --> 01:11:42,000
Oh, it's amazing.

790
01:11:42,000 --> 01:11:43,000
Other than myself.

791
01:11:43,000 --> 01:11:47,000
It's amazing when they apply just the right amount of pressure.

792
01:11:47,000 --> 01:11:49,000
Oh, yeah.

793
01:11:49,000 --> 01:11:55,000
The technique is so euphoric that customers will often drift to sleep or give sounds of euphoria.

794
01:11:55,000 --> 01:12:04,000
Her services are so popular that she also travels to major populations, New York, Los Angeles or Philadelphia to see her clientele.

795
01:12:04,000 --> 01:12:08,000
Soon she hopes to take her practice on tour to Europe.

796
01:12:08,000 --> 01:12:19,000
She said she's never broken a nail, she told the Wall Street Journal, and she files her nails before each scratching session and scrubs her claws with soap and a nail brush.

797
01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:24,000
But the businesswoman insists that scratching is not sexual.

798
01:12:24,000 --> 01:12:30,000
It may not be, but it's almost as good as you know.

799
01:12:30,000 --> 01:12:32,000
Maybe not to her.

800
01:12:32,000 --> 01:12:33,000
Maybe not to her.

801
01:12:33,000 --> 01:12:41,000
Yeah, we don't scratch chests or bellies, George said, adding that she turned down a request for one man to have his nipples touched.

802
01:12:41,000 --> 01:12:44,000
You have those people with their mind in the gutter.

803
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:45,000
Just my back.

804
01:12:45,000 --> 01:12:46,000
I'm good with that.

805
01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:48,000
I'm good with that, too.

806
01:12:48,000 --> 01:12:56,000
You have those people have their mind in the gutter, she stated, but George isn't the only professional earning a living through non-sexual scratching.

807
01:12:56,000 --> 01:13:12,000
Judy Luther, who opened her Pasadena, California, soft touch ASMR spa two years ago and recently quit her six figure job to pursue scratching full time, offers 50 minute sessions for $110 while slots fill up a week in advance.

808
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:17,000
She refuses to mail clients after instances of unusual requests.

809
01:13:17,000 --> 01:13:22,000
It's like this very pure touch that's purely for pleasure and nothing else, but not in a sexual way.

810
01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:24,000
She told the Journal.

811
01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:25,000
Right.

812
01:13:25,000 --> 01:13:27,000
So yeah, okay, there you go.

813
01:13:27,000 --> 01:13:28,000
I get it.

814
01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:29,000
I get it.

815
01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:31,000
I get it, too.

816
01:13:31,000 --> 01:13:40,000
So yeah, you know, they could say whatever, but everybody interprets it different, right?

817
01:13:40,000 --> 01:13:43,000
Yeah, yeah, it's just like a masseuse.

818
01:13:43,000 --> 01:13:44,000
Yeah, yeah.

819
01:13:44,000 --> 01:14:00,000
I mean, I go every month to have to get massaged and it is not sexual, but it is just it's euphoric because these are places that I hurt and I need worked over.

820
01:14:00,000 --> 01:14:16,000
And the girl that I go to is so good that you have to be and I imagine back scratching the same, you have to be exactly on their same page and level to really benefit from it fully.

821
01:14:16,000 --> 01:14:23,000
No, I mean, your minds have to be working concert together about how you feel and a good masseuse can tell that.

822
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:32,000
And Tammy, the girl that I go to, can touch in certain spots and go, you know what, this is a problem area, and she knows how to attack it.

823
01:14:32,000 --> 01:14:40,000
And that's why I'll never go anywhere else but her is because of that, because she has this connection with how my body feels.

824
01:14:40,000 --> 01:14:42,000
And it's amazing.

825
01:14:42,000 --> 01:14:46,000
And back scratching, I think, is probably along the same lines to me.

826
01:14:46,000 --> 01:14:47,000
I think it is.

827
01:14:47,000 --> 01:14:51,000
So anyhow, Rob, you got something.

828
01:14:51,000 --> 01:14:52,000
Yeah, I do.

829
01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:55,000
Actually, this is a good story here.

830
01:14:55,000 --> 01:14:56,000
Okay.

831
01:14:56,000 --> 01:15:00,000
And it's another local story, by the way.

832
01:15:00,000 --> 01:15:01,000
Okay.

833
01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:21,000
The U.S. military transported out of Syria an Ozarks native who had disappeared seven months ago into former President Bashar Assad's notorious prison system and was among the thousands released this week by rebels.

834
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:23,000
Uh-huh.

835
01:15:23,000 --> 01:15:40,000
Travis Timmerman, 29, was flown out of Syria on a U.S. military helicopter, according to a U.S. official who spoke on condition of anonymity to discuss an ongoing operation.

836
01:15:40,000 --> 01:15:46,000
Timmerman's family says the military flew him to Jordan.

837
01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:47,000
Uh-huh.

838
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:51,000
Here's the cool part.

839
01:15:51,000 --> 01:16:02,000
Timmerman is from Urbana, Missouri, about 50 miles north of Springfield in the southwestern part of the state.

840
01:16:02,000 --> 01:16:08,000
He earned a finance degree from Missouri State University in 2017.

841
01:16:08,000 --> 01:16:09,000
Okay.

842
01:16:09,000 --> 01:16:14,000
Urbana is like 15, 20 miles from me.

843
01:16:14,000 --> 01:16:18,000
Yeah, and they don't know why he was over there, do they?

844
01:16:18,000 --> 01:16:19,000
Yeah, they do.

845
01:16:19,000 --> 01:16:20,000
Oh, they do?

846
01:16:20,000 --> 01:16:21,000
Oh, I didn't see that part.

847
01:16:21,000 --> 01:16:24,000
I thought it was just a mystery.

848
01:16:24,000 --> 01:16:41,000
Now, after being rescued, he thanked his rescuers for freeing him, but has told American officials that he would like to stay in the region, according to another person familiar with the matter who was not authorized to comment publicly.

849
01:16:41,000 --> 01:16:42,000
Okay.

850
01:16:42,000 --> 01:16:58,000
Timmerman was detained after he crossed into Syria while on a Christian pilgrimage from a mountain along the eastern Lebanese town of Zile in June.

851
01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:12,000
He told the Associated Press that he was not ill-treated while in Palestine Branch, a notorious detention facility operated by Syrian intelligence.

852
01:17:12,000 --> 01:17:13,000
Hmm.

853
01:17:13,000 --> 01:17:14,000
Oh, okay.

854
01:17:14,000 --> 01:17:15,000
He's coming home.

855
01:17:15,000 --> 01:17:16,000
Wow, okay.

856
01:17:16,000 --> 01:17:20,000
The article I read, they said it was unclear why he was over there.

857
01:17:20,000 --> 01:17:21,000
Now, that makes a lot of sense.

858
01:17:21,000 --> 01:17:23,000
He was on a Christian pilgrimage.

859
01:17:23,000 --> 01:17:24,000
I get that.

860
01:17:24,000 --> 01:17:25,000
Okay.

861
01:17:25,000 --> 01:17:31,000
Well, I'm glad he's on his way home, and I know where Urbana is, and I know what is it, like 100 people?

862
01:17:31,000 --> 01:17:33,000
About that, yeah.

863
01:17:33,000 --> 01:17:34,000
I mean, it is a very smart town.

864
01:17:34,000 --> 01:17:38,000
Urbana, Brandt, it's over on 73 Highway.

865
01:17:38,000 --> 01:17:42,000
Like, it's a cut through from Max Creek to Buffalo.

866
01:17:42,000 --> 01:17:43,000
Yeah.

867
01:17:43,000 --> 01:17:45,000
Instead of going over 65, you run down 73.

868
01:17:45,000 --> 01:17:46,000
Yeah, yeah.

869
01:17:46,000 --> 01:17:48,000
Graves you about 15 minutes.

870
01:17:48,000 --> 01:17:49,000
Yep.

871
01:17:49,000 --> 01:17:52,000
It routinely gets grazed by tornadoes.

872
01:17:52,000 --> 01:17:54,000
Yeah, very, very much so.

873
01:17:54,000 --> 01:17:55,000
Yeah, very much so.

874
01:17:55,000 --> 01:17:56,000
Okay, well.

875
01:17:56,000 --> 01:17:59,000
Oh, and also a shout out.

876
01:17:59,000 --> 01:18:00,000
Oh, okay.

877
01:18:00,000 --> 01:18:04,000
Happy belated birthday.

878
01:18:04,000 --> 01:18:09,000
December 11th, Nikki Six.

879
01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:12,000
I'm not wishing him a happy birthday.

880
01:18:12,000 --> 01:18:15,000
I can't fucking stand him now, but go ahead.

881
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:17,000
No, no, no, get this.

882
01:18:17,000 --> 01:18:18,000
Okay.

883
01:18:18,000 --> 01:18:23,000
Nikki Six turned 66.

884
01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:29,000
Wow, the six turned 66.

885
01:18:29,000 --> 01:18:31,000
Okay.

886
01:18:31,000 --> 01:18:33,000
That was more meant then, don't you think?

887
01:18:33,000 --> 01:18:35,000
Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, it is.

888
01:18:35,000 --> 01:18:36,000
I like that, Rob.

889
01:18:36,000 --> 01:18:38,000
I'm just so, I am so.

890
01:18:38,000 --> 01:18:41,000
I had you in mind when I heard that this morning.

891
01:18:41,000 --> 01:18:43,000
It's fine, I love that.

892
01:18:43,000 --> 01:18:46,000
I am so disgruntled with him and his.

893
01:18:46,000 --> 01:18:48,000
I know, I know you are.

894
01:18:48,000 --> 01:18:52,000
I feel, I feel lied to, his whole schtick.

895
01:18:52,000 --> 01:18:55,000
So anyhow, anyhow, you know what?

896
01:18:55,000 --> 01:18:57,000
I mean, that's for the music creeps.

897
01:18:57,000 --> 01:19:02,000
We read your list today that it will be posted a little bit later about country acts that were one hit wonders.

898
01:19:02,000 --> 01:19:03,000
Loved them.

899
01:19:03,000 --> 01:19:04,000
Yeah.

900
01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:05,000
Yeah.

901
01:19:05,000 --> 01:19:09,000
So come up with another one of whatever you want and we'll read it on there.

902
01:19:09,000 --> 01:19:13,000
I decided to let you have free form, whatever you want to put down.

903
01:19:13,000 --> 01:19:15,000
Okay, well, I was wondering that.

904
01:19:15,000 --> 01:19:16,000
All right.

905
01:19:16,000 --> 01:19:18,000
Yeah, yeah, Topher and I think that's a great idea.

906
01:19:18,000 --> 01:19:20,000
You just do what you.

907
01:19:20,000 --> 01:19:27,000
Actually, yeah, because when it comes to rock and stuff, all three of us think just alike.

908
01:19:27,000 --> 01:19:29,000
We love the country aspect of it.

909
01:19:29,000 --> 01:19:38,000
I love the country aspect of it and you do them what you know, which is far superior to mine and Christopher's intellect on country music.

910
01:19:38,000 --> 01:19:40,000
So please, whatever you want.

911
01:19:40,000 --> 01:19:42,000
And if you don't feel like doing country.

912
01:19:42,000 --> 01:19:44,000
I'll go all over the map.

913
01:19:44,000 --> 01:19:47,000
Do whatever you want and that's what we want.

914
01:19:47,000 --> 01:19:49,000
Just send me whatever once a week.

915
01:19:49,000 --> 01:19:51,000
You know, we record on Tuesdays.

916
01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:57,000
So, you know, sometime before Tuesday, send me your next list and we will talk about it.

917
01:19:57,000 --> 01:19:58,000
All right.

918
01:19:58,000 --> 01:20:03,000
And just so you know, I will obey Tulsa King limit to seven.

919
01:20:03,000 --> 01:20:05,000
Okay, you got it.

920
01:20:05,000 --> 01:20:07,000
Tulsa King is not having no time.

921
01:20:07,000 --> 01:20:09,000
I lost a list of his.

922
01:20:09,000 --> 01:20:13,000
So when you hear this Tulsa King, please send me it again.

923
01:20:13,000 --> 01:20:16,000
I can't remember what it was, but I can't find it.

924
01:20:16,000 --> 01:20:21,000
The emails like I accidentally erased a bunch of them.

925
01:20:21,000 --> 01:20:25,000
I think this is the final week, isn't it?

926
01:20:25,000 --> 01:20:28,000
Grandma, it is and Ricky.

927
01:20:28,000 --> 01:20:34,000
It's not Ricky's final week, but it's Grandma Opal and Jimmy Jimmy.

928
01:20:34,000 --> 01:20:37,000
We're hoping like hell you send me something.

929
01:20:37,000 --> 01:20:40,000
I don't think my email, I think, is working well now.

930
01:20:40,000 --> 01:20:42,000
So I don't think it's that.

931
01:20:42,000 --> 01:20:48,000
But just in case if the other one if one of them didn't go through, please send me another one.

932
01:20:48,000 --> 01:20:56,000
And and I tell you another thing, too, is if you're ever around your grandma or if you just want to say hi,

933
01:20:56,000 --> 01:21:01,000
I will send you the number in an email and just get on there and go, Hey, this is Jimmy.

934
01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:05,000
And Grandma Opal is in here or she is here and she wants to say hi.

935
01:21:05,000 --> 01:21:06,000
We would love that.

936
01:21:06,000 --> 01:21:09,000
So we hope we don't you know, we hope we don't have to dump you guys.

937
01:21:09,000 --> 01:21:14,000
It's been a longstanding tradition, but this is it.

938
01:21:14,000 --> 01:21:17,000
I mean, if I don't get it by next week, we don't mention you anymore.

939
01:21:17,000 --> 01:21:19,000
We just mentioned Ricky.

940
01:21:19,000 --> 01:21:21,000
No. Yeah, Ricky.

941
01:21:21,000 --> 01:21:22,000
Ricky. Yeah. Yeah.

942
01:21:22,000 --> 01:21:32,000
So anyhow, I read where parents are starting to detour their kids from playing high school football

943
01:21:32,000 --> 01:21:43,000
and college football because they are afraid that they might get drafted by the New York Jets.

944
01:21:43,000 --> 01:21:46,000
The United Kingdom, they're having again a short.

945
01:21:46,000 --> 01:21:49,000
I figured you were going to go Cowboys on that one.

946
01:21:49,000 --> 01:21:53,000
That too. That too.

947
01:21:53,000 --> 01:21:57,000
No, I just read this the other day and it was New York Jets.

948
01:21:57,000 --> 01:21:59,000
I stuck to it because of Aaron Rodgers and all that.

949
01:21:59,000 --> 01:22:03,000
But yeah, the Cowboys would actually work better most of the time.

950
01:22:03,000 --> 01:22:06,000
The UK has again a shortage.

951
01:22:06,000 --> 01:22:08,000
I'm not kidding you.

952
01:22:08,000 --> 01:22:12,000
I mean, I can understand, you know, the shit is like liquid calzone.

953
01:22:12,000 --> 01:22:15,000
It's like five pounds of fucking wheat.

954
01:22:15,000 --> 01:22:18,000
I mean, you know, it is so heavy.

955
01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:20,000
It's like eating a loaf of bread.

956
01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:27,000
But they love it over there and they're limiting all these all these bars and pubs to like a case a week.

957
01:22:27,000 --> 01:22:29,000
And people over there are freaking out.

958
01:22:29,000 --> 01:22:30,000
They're trying to get a mail order.

959
01:22:30,000 --> 01:22:32,000
They're trying to do all this stuff.

960
01:22:32,000 --> 01:22:33,000
They don't know what to do.

961
01:22:33,000 --> 01:22:37,000
People are spending a lot of money on the black market to get Guinness because that's how much they love this stuff.

962
01:22:37,000 --> 01:22:41,000
Me, I just find another beer, wouldn't you?

963
01:22:41,000 --> 01:22:44,000
Yeah, yeah, you know, we ran out of Yenling.

964
01:22:44,000 --> 01:22:47,000
I'd be like, OK, well, I guess I'll switch to something else for a little while.

965
01:22:47,000 --> 01:22:51,000
You know, there's other beers that I like, just not as well as Yenling.

966
01:22:51,000 --> 01:22:56,000
But, you know, I mean, I could do another beer for a while till they got it figured out.

967
01:22:56,000 --> 01:22:59,000
But they are flipping out over there.

968
01:22:59,000 --> 01:23:06,000
And, you know, I mean, like I always say, Guinness is like a fucking pizza without the pepperoni and cheese.

969
01:23:06,000 --> 01:23:12,000
So anyhow, the McGrib debacle is still going on.

970
01:23:12,000 --> 01:23:16,000
People are demanding that they resell them and they go online.

971
01:23:16,000 --> 01:23:19,000
And me, I'm like, no, they dry jack me one time.

972
01:23:19,000 --> 01:23:20,000
I'm not doing it again.

973
01:23:20,000 --> 01:23:22,000
Fuck them. I don't want it.

974
01:23:22,000 --> 01:23:26,000
So anyhow, so but who knows?

975
01:23:26,000 --> 01:23:31,000
Maybe that whole thing is manufactured and nobody really cares except me.

976
01:23:31,000 --> 01:23:35,000
So let's see. You got anything you want to say?

977
01:23:35,000 --> 01:23:39,000
Anything you want to go into?

978
01:23:39,000 --> 01:23:42,000
Actually, that's about all I have for now.

979
01:23:42,000 --> 01:23:45,000
All right. Well, then let's go ahead and call this a wrap.

980
01:23:45,000 --> 01:23:48,000
And Rob, I thank you for joining me once again.

981
01:23:48,000 --> 01:23:51,000
And like always, we had a fucking blast doing this.

982
01:23:51,000 --> 01:23:53,000
Yeah, yeah.

983
01:23:53,000 --> 01:23:56,000
So I love the energy we've been bringing here lately.

984
01:23:56,000 --> 01:23:59,000
They've been very good episodes and I've been listening to them.

985
01:23:59,000 --> 01:24:06,000
And really, I mean, when we get on a roll, I personally think it's as good as anything.

986
01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:07,000
I really do.

987
01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:10,000
Oh, yeah. It's like it's like the old days.

988
01:24:10,000 --> 01:24:15,000
We were just hanging out around, you know?

989
01:24:15,000 --> 01:24:17,000
Yeah. Yep.

990
01:24:17,000 --> 01:24:24,000
There's two people I'm trying to get on with us, and that would be Davy and my friend Sandor that I used to go out of town and work with.

991
01:24:24,000 --> 01:24:25,000
He has a lot of stories.

992
01:24:25,000 --> 01:24:29,000
He has a lot of stories that he could speak on that he remembers.

993
01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:31,000
And I probably don't.

994
01:24:31,000 --> 01:24:37,000
So anyhow, he would know the Duke would love to get on.

995
01:24:37,000 --> 01:24:39,000
Sure. Yeah.

996
01:24:39,000 --> 01:24:43,000
Just have him call him when you call in and I'll put him on three way.

997
01:24:43,000 --> 01:24:49,000
The only thing is the reason Topher does not join us is his three way is a hard thing to do when you're podcasting.

998
01:24:49,000 --> 01:24:54,000
So we'll have to like do like a roundtable where like I'll go, da da da da da Rob.

999
01:24:54,000 --> 01:24:57,000
And then you go, da da da da Duke.

1000
01:24:57,000 --> 01:24:58,000
Da da da Mark.

1001
01:24:58,000 --> 01:25:02,000
We could do something like that because if not, you talk over each other.

1002
01:25:02,000 --> 01:25:11,000
It's just natural because three people talking with that delay is hard to do.

1003
01:25:11,000 --> 01:25:13,000
So but we can do it any time. It's fine with me.

1004
01:25:13,000 --> 01:25:16,000
I'd love to hear from him.

1005
01:25:16,000 --> 01:25:17,000
All right.

1006
01:25:17,000 --> 01:25:22,000
Well, he's actually coming down Thursday and we're going to go do some Christmas shopping.

1007
01:25:22,000 --> 01:25:28,000
So OK, I get off at six thirty shopping for ourselves.

1008
01:25:28,000 --> 01:25:31,000
What we're doing. I'm off at six thirty in the evening every night.

1009
01:25:31,000 --> 01:25:35,000
So if you want to do it one night like it may be eight o'clock, that would be fine with me.

1010
01:25:35,000 --> 01:25:39,000
Just let me know a little bit ahead of time.

1011
01:25:39,000 --> 01:25:42,000
Friday night. I I had an idea.

1012
01:25:42,000 --> 01:25:45,000
I'll go over it with you. OK. Friday night.

1013
01:25:45,000 --> 01:25:48,000
I can't Christmas deal. So anyhow.

1014
01:25:48,000 --> 01:25:51,000
All right. Everybody, thank you for listening.

1015
01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:54,000
I'm off for two and a half weeks after tomorrow. Oh, cool.

1016
01:25:54,000 --> 01:25:56,000
All right. You know what we can do?

1017
01:25:56,000 --> 01:25:58,000
We can do a few of them. Whatever you feel like.

1018
01:25:58,000 --> 01:26:04,000
I know. OK. We will talk about it off this podcast and figure it out.

1019
01:26:04,000 --> 01:26:06,000
All right, everybody. Thank you for listening.

1020
01:26:06,000 --> 01:26:09,000
Have a great night.

1021
01:26:09,000 --> 01:26:13,000
Good night, assholes. Night, assholes.

1022
01:26:13,000 --> 01:26:16,000
Oh, no. Looks like the show's over, kids.

1023
01:26:16,000 --> 01:26:20,000
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.

1024
01:26:20,000 --> 01:26:37,000
Fear not, assholes. They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.