1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:29,360 And now it's time for... 2 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:32,720 The Daily Deucebag Pledge! 3 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,300 Two Deucebags and a Microphone Pledge. 4 00:00:35,300 --> 00:00:40,560 I, Joe, or Jane Listener, hereby promise to download every show. 5 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:47,900 I, Joe, or Jane Listener, hereby promise to grab family members' phones and download the show from there. 6 00:00:47,900 --> 00:00:54,800 I, Joe, or Jane Listener, hereby promise to go to public computers and download the show from there. 7 00:00:54,800 --> 00:01:00,700 I, Joe, or Jane Listener, hereby promise to laugh at all the unfunny jokes. 8 00:01:00,700 --> 00:01:07,860 I, Joe, or Jane Listener, hereby promise to lie to all my friends and tell them how good the show is. 9 00:01:07,860 --> 00:01:19,060 And finally, I, Joe, or Jane Listener, promise to visit Montrose, Missouri to take advantage of the power plant, campgrounds, and junkyard all within its quarter-mile radius. 10 00:01:19,060 --> 00:01:28,560 Here at Two Deucebags and a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity. 11 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,560 Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. 12 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:33,260 At least we admit it. 13 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:39,560 Not like all those other guys, we can and will lie if it makes the story better. 14 00:01:39,560 --> 00:01:42,360 Two Deucebags and a Microphone. 15 00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:50,560 We Talk, GameZero. 16 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:55,560 Put small twigs around the base of your area of camp. 17 00:01:55,560 --> 00:02:04,560 That way, if there is an intruder trying to sneak up on you, you can hear the twigs quaking and be alerted about them immediately. 18 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:12,560 Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity. 19 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:19,560 You are dressed like an assistant debate coach at an Ohio State Middle School. 20 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:23,560 And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark. 21 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:36,560 If you melt dry ice in a pool, can you swim without getting wet? 22 00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:40,560 I may never know. 23 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:54,560 Two Deucebags and a Microphone. I'm Mark. 24 00:02:54,560 --> 00:03:00,560 The first thing I'd like to say is, this is just totally out of nothing from nothing. 25 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:03,560 Nike, you motherfuckers. 26 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:09,560 I swear, you cannot come out with a cool pair of shoes and double E's. 27 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:17,560 I have Fred Flintstone feet. I need double E's. I can't wear those narrow ass ones that you make. 28 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:24,560 And the only double E's that I can find that you offer are the ugliest shoes you've ever made in your whole career. 29 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:30,560 I'm sick of this. If I want a good pair of Nike's, which to me, the Nike's fit better. 30 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:36,560 It's not like I necessarily really like that company or anything, but they fit my feet so well. 31 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:40,560 They don't hurt as much as they do when I wear some other type. 32 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:45,560 I like Adidas. I like a lot of them, but they don't fit right. 33 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,560 New Balance is okay. 34 00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:53,560 Skechers is... I mean, just nothing else. 35 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:57,560 Pumas are trash to me. 36 00:03:57,560 --> 00:03:59,560 The only thing that really fits is Nike. 37 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:04,560 And I don't like the shoes that you go personalize because they're so overrated. 38 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:12,560 I mean, you spend $5,000 on a pair of shoes that's not any better than a pair of Nike's that feels good. 39 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:18,560 So I have to buy the dumbest looking pair of shoes that Nike's makes just to get a double E. 40 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:23,560 And I'm sick of it. There has got to be an option. I don't know. I'm going to find it. 41 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:32,560 There is someone somewhere that creates a decent shoe that fits my foot well in double E and doesn't look stupid. 42 00:04:32,560 --> 00:04:36,560 And I will find you one of these days. It's only a matter of time, I'm sure. 43 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:39,560 I have not given up hope. 44 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:42,560 So we go right into this. Oasis. 45 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:48,560 You remember that overrated English band that some people think are worth buying a ticket to? 46 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:52,560 Well, they had a huge issue with dynamic pricing. 47 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:58,560 Dynamic pricing is from the devil. It is evil. It is crap. It is bullshit. 48 00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:03,560 I mean, whoever came up with dynamic pricing needs to burn in hell. 49 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:09,560 Right now. Not tomorrow. Not two minutes from now. But right now. 50 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:15,560 They had this huge issue. Worms paying over a grand or much more for a ticket. 51 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:20,560 You know, I mean, this dynamic pricing is evil. 52 00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:25,560 It's like there becomes a surge in interest in a concert. 53 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:29,560 Like maybe it's getting ready to sell out or something and everybody runs out to grab a ticket. 54 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:31,560 And all of a sudden the price shoots up five times. 55 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:37,560 People get ripped off. And actually, really, I mean, they're letting them do it. 56 00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:40,560 Because people are buying these things for that type of price. 57 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:44,560 And that's what the problem is. If people say dynamic pricing screw you. 58 00:05:44,560 --> 00:05:49,560 It will go away. If everyone just like left and said no, and I'm not even going to go now. 59 00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:53,560 Because you guys even suggested you were going to do it. I'm not doing it now. 60 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:57,560 I'm not partaking in that. That's a big ripoff. I think it's bullshit. 61 00:05:57,560 --> 00:06:00,560 If people did that, it would end. 62 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:04,560 You know, you want to buy an Oasis ticket for that kind of money. 63 00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:07,560 How about you give me a grand that I'll give you a kick in the ass. 64 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:10,560 And we'll call it good. 65 00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:14,560 I would be more than happy to kick a Brit square in the ass. 66 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:18,560 I mean, call me silly, but it's, you know, I think it'd be fun. 67 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:22,560 Nothing against British. Love them. A lot of people. Charming, great people. 68 00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:27,560 But I think it'd be fun, especially for a grand or two. 69 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:35,560 So Iron Maiden has a 2025 Run For Your Lives tour. 70 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:40,560 The tour will celebrate the band's 50th anniversary of being a band. 71 00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:47,560 The band will perform from its first nine studio albums. 72 00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:56,560 Ticket resell in the UK will be capped at face value and will not open until closer to the tour start. 73 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:59,560 So you can't get on there for next year and buy a ticket right now. 74 00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:10,560 And then it sells out and then you're at everybody's disposal about if you really need to go or whatever and spend all that money because someone scalping the piss out of you. 75 00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:14,560 Ticket resell in the UK will be capped at face value. 76 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:20,560 And like I said, it won't open closer to the tour start. 77 00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:28,560 Iron Maiden urges to only purchase tickets from authorized outlets. 78 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:36,560 And that's so true. If people buy from these other third, I have before too, not knowing before I learned the industry a little bit better. 79 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:41,560 And there's some of them where the concert was canceled and I didn't even know it. 80 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,560 And I ended up going to some part of the country. 81 00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:49,560 You know, I mean, the furthest I've flew for a concert has been Nashville. 82 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:53,560 And that was to see the Dead Daisies with Glenn Hughes because I'm a Glenn Hughes freak. 83 00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:58,560 So I went there to go see them. That's the furthest I went. 84 00:07:58,560 --> 00:08:03,560 I'm not going to go any further to see a band. That's it. That's my rule. 85 00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:08,560 So this dynamic pricing is just complete bullshit. 86 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:12,560 And if people didn't put up with it, it wouldn't happen. 87 00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:15,560 If people said, you know what? No, I'm not doing it. 88 00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:20,560 Like I said before, it's people. It's people that do it. It's rubes that will do it. 89 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:25,560 So anyhow, I mean, you know, not like anyone will listen to me. 90 00:08:25,560 --> 00:08:32,560 So anyhow. Oh, by the way, ratings are former ratings. 91 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:36,560 Our RSS are really good. Thank you. 92 00:08:36,560 --> 00:08:41,560 It's just me now, but I think what's carrying the show is Topher and I's NFL show. 93 00:08:41,560 --> 00:08:45,560 That seems to really be booming. People really seem to be loving that and catching on to that. 94 00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:57,560 So thank you. And then after the NFL season is over, Topher and I decided we're going to specialize in other podcasts, like maybe a music one or maybe a what if that that sounds interesting. 95 00:08:57,560 --> 00:09:02,560 Like what if this happened or what if that happened or what if we did this to this? 96 00:09:02,560 --> 00:09:08,560 And also possibly, I don't know, a music one, maybe movie reviews. 97 00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:11,560 We're going to do some interesting stuff. We're going to do some fun stuff. 98 00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:16,560 So stay tuned after the after the Chiefs win their third Super Bowl in the role row. 99 00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:19,560 And we're celebrating and going nuts and down at City Market. 100 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,560 Everybody's running up to screaming in our headphones. 101 00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:25,560 So after that, we will come up with another podcast. 102 00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:34,560 So fear no more Topher and I will continue this this stretch of debauchery and stupidity. 103 00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:41,560 So a study by the Nuremberg Psychology Online at Nuremberg. 104 00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:44,560 I remember him a long time ago. I didn't know they're still around, though. 105 00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:53,560 So, OK, Nuremberg Psychology Online has determined that 80 percent of Americans participate in a cheat mill. 106 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,560 Like is what you eat a cheat meal? 107 00:09:56,560 --> 00:10:05,560 That's where a person is alone doing business or whatever and grabs a second meal, disposing of the containers and such. 108 00:10:05,560 --> 00:10:14,560 So doing it on the you know, on the on the sly, grabbing a burger and then like taking the wrapper and throwing it in a trash can somewhere. 109 00:10:14,560 --> 00:10:21,560 So you're you have this meal, but you're acting like you didn't or it's an omission of not telling the person or whatever. 110 00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:27,560 Fifty percent of people pulled consider that a huge trust issue. 111 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:30,560 I don't know. I don't necessarily look at that as a trust issue. 112 00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:35,560 I mean, you know, like here's the way I kind of look at that right here is this right here. 113 00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:41,560 OK, someone's trying to stick to a diet and they don't want to let their partner down too much. 114 00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:46,560 So they went out and they grabbed a burger just to kind of keep them over, but they don't do it all the time. 115 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:49,560 Yeah, yeah. Now, if they do it all the time and sneak around and do that. 116 00:10:49,560 --> 00:10:54,560 Yeah, I kind of get that because then that would lend to other behaviors maybe. 117 00:10:54,560 --> 00:11:00,560 So so I get that. But it was just like once every once in a while they do it. 118 00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:03,560 I don't think I'd really have that big of a problem with it. 119 00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:07,560 So, you know, I can see this somewhat. 120 00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:13,560 Maybe you're trying to help your spouse lose weight with special meals or exercise regimen, 121 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:16,560 and it would be at least lying or disrespectful as well. 122 00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:23,560 So I can understand why people are offended or pissed off by it or or that if they're doing something special 123 00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:29,560 like eating, eating well with them, even though they want to, you know, they're eating well, eating less with them, 124 00:11:29,560 --> 00:11:33,560 eating more greens, fiber, you know, whatever the deal is. 125 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:36,560 And then they go out and do something to ruin it all. 126 00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:39,560 But they don't tell you I could see people having a problem with that. 127 00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:45,560 Yes, 30 percent would consider leaving their partner over this. 128 00:11:45,560 --> 00:11:47,560 I thought that was a large number. 129 00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:50,560 Thirty percent over a cheat meal. 130 00:11:50,560 --> 00:11:55,560 I mean, if it's a bitch will, I think there would have to be a couple of conversations. 131 00:11:55,560 --> 00:12:01,560 It would definitely have to like I would have to say something like, look, if you don't want to die, 132 00:12:01,560 --> 00:12:03,560 it really don't. You want me to leave you alone. 133 00:12:03,560 --> 00:12:05,560 Just go ahead and do it and do it here. 134 00:12:05,560 --> 00:12:08,560 You don't have to run down to smacks. 135 00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:11,560 Only people around here of a certain age would know what I'm talking about. 136 00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:12,560 They're no longer around. 137 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:18,560 You don't have to go to smacks and get a smackaroo with large fries and a shake. 138 00:12:18,560 --> 00:12:26,560 So and 15 percent would definitely leave with the thought that one lie means more lies. 139 00:12:26,560 --> 00:12:31,560 But I go to this only in America do you have this. 140 00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:33,560 This is first world problems. 141 00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:40,560 Definitely. And maybe I'll even do a little first world problems episode on that, you know, or a little bit. 142 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:44,560 Maybe. Anyhow, that's interesting. 143 00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:49,560 I don't know. I see points in a lot of them. 144 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:52,560 I think I just kind of spelled out how I feel about it. 145 00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:54,560 You can have your feelings about it, too. 146 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:57,560 So anyhow, we move on. 147 00:12:57,560 --> 00:13:01,560 You watch the news. It looks grim. 148 00:13:01,560 --> 00:13:03,560 Is an apocalypse inevitable? 149 00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:09,560 We suggest you download all of our podcasts beforehand and have multiple mobile chargers. 150 00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:14,560 We have. 151 00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:18,560 Remember, communication is essential post apocalypse. 152 00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:26,560 You must have two radios that are solar chargeable, have several on hand in case any of them do break. 153 00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:34,560 That way, if one is out guarding the perimeter of your property or out gathering food or whatever. 154 00:13:34,560 --> 00:13:39,560 You could stay in communication and know where the other person is. 155 00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:43,560 Next up, things overhead in hell. 156 00:13:43,560 --> 00:13:50,560 Only water that's available here in hell is sulfur well water. 157 00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:52,560 La. 158 00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:57,560 Hey, look, I think we found land. Oh my God, I think we're safe. 159 00:13:57,560 --> 00:14:01,560 Oh, no, it's the island of horrible jokes. 160 00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:07,560 Why? 161 00:14:07,560 --> 00:14:09,560 Can't it be? 162 00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:13,560 Because then it would be a foot. 163 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:30,560 Oh, in the subject of EVs, electric vehicles, there's a new issue that's coming up. 164 00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:39,560 There are barriers on the road that are not strong enough for electric vehicles coming at them to hold it. 165 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:46,560 The guardrails are made for a lighter car, I guess. 166 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:51,560 I had no idea that an electric vehicle was. 167 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:55,560 I don't know, would have more of an impact than a combustion engine. 168 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:59,560 You wouldn't think so. I mean, a combustion engine is really heavy. 169 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:08,560 But evidently, there's guardrails that cannot support an EV coming at them and they will simply go through it. 170 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:10,560 It won't stop it. 171 00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:16,560 So guardrails may not be able to stop EVs from pushing through them due to the weight of EVs and their low center of gravity. 172 00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:18,560 OK, it's a little bit of both. 173 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:26,560 Guardrails are typically tested for vehicles weighing up to 5000 pounds, but many EVs weigh up to 30 percent more. 174 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:32,560 More testing is planned to determine how to engineer roadside barriers to better protect EVs. 175 00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:37,560 OK, so EVs are not getting a gasoline tax. 176 00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:44,560 So the people that are paying the gasoline tax are also going to be paying for these new barriers to put in. 177 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:49,560 So that seems a little bit unfair. 178 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:58,560 It seems like the people owning these EVs that you're changing all these guardrails to fit to be able to hold them 179 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:02,560 maybe should have to bear some of the cost, if not all of it. 180 00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:08,560 So, but I don't see that happening because the government's like, rah rah, EVs, that's it, yeah, rah rah. 181 00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:10,560 And they're not going to do it right now. 182 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:13,560 What they're going to do is they're going to wait till later when everybody owns one. 183 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:17,560 And then they're going to go, oh, by the way, we had to do all this infrastructure work. 184 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:26,560 So you're going to have to pay a special EV tax, you know, once a year, four times a year, every time you're at the charging station. 185 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:30,560 So whatever. Yeah, I could see that happening very easily. 186 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,560 And I would bet money that it would happen. 187 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:43,560 So and also charging infrastructure is having a lot of problems, too, besides these barriers. 188 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:48,560 Lack of charging infrastructures is a major barrier to EV adoption. 189 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:55,560 Some challenges include this charging speed, slow charging speeds can be a barrier. 190 00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:59,560 Charger access, some chargers may be inaccessible. 191 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:06,560 Charger cost, the cost of chargers can be a barrier, not to mention the batteries. 192 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:11,560 Charger compatibility, some chargers may not be compatible with all EVs. 193 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:17,560 Lack of garages, apartment residents may not have a garage to charge their EVs. 194 00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:25,560 Lack of support centers, there may be a lack of support centers and facilities for EV maintenance and repairs. 195 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:30,560 So all these put together sounds to me like a class A clusterfuck. 196 00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:36,560 So they have a lot of stuff to work out, but still we're getting pushed into buying an EV. 197 00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:42,560 Not me, not yet, too many questions unresolved, too many things could come up. 198 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:46,560 Not this guy, I'm holding out. 199 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:54,560 And now, so per the New York Post, Arch Manning's first career start for the Longhorns 200 00:17:54,560 --> 00:18:00,560 wasn't the only thing people were buzzing about after Texas demolished Louisiana Monroe. 201 00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:03,560 Of course, Louisiana Monroe. 202 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:06,560 There's not a bigger tomato can than them, I'm sure. 203 00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:13,560 On Saturday, 51 to 3, a young girl was seen repeatedly drinking what appeared to be a can of Micolob Ultra beer 204 00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:20,560 which had an orange koozie over it, while in the stands at Darrell K. Royal Texas Memorial Stadium in Austin 205 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:23,560 as seen on a viral video on TikTok. 206 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,560 Oh, of course, that old gag, TikTok. 207 00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:30,560 Toddler drinking is really bad, the person who shared the video wrote. 208 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:35,560 Now, I got one thing to say. 209 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:40,560 Micolob Ultra? Are they really calling that beer? 210 00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:45,560 I'm sorry, I'm thinking a child could drink 10 of them and be fine. 211 00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:54,560 Micolob Ultra probably contains, I don't know, it's got to be a very low volume or weight of beer in it. 212 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:59,560 I mean, it takes literally, I don't think you can drink enough of them to even get a buzz. 213 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:03,560 I mean, to me, it's pretty much water. 214 00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:08,560 So, anytime if anyone offers me a Micolob Ultra after I get them beaten their ass, 215 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:15,560 I will take the Micolob Ultra, I will avoid the middleman and I will pour it straight in the urinal and not worry about it. 216 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:20,560 And I'll get something that tastes good, or something that will get me to ground zero 217 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:26,560 in a little bit quicker than 4,000 of these beers, supposedly. 218 00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:33,560 I'm sorry Micolob Ultra, allegedly, and all that stuff, but not the best beer, not the strongest beer. 219 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:40,560 Pretty much water for people that want to drink all day and not get a buzz. 220 00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:44,560 So, anyhow, if you're going to drink all day and not get a buzz, I'm sorry. 221 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:48,560 I think water would work just as well as a Micolob Ultra. 222 00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:52,560 So that little girl drinking it, by the way, I don't think she was really drinking it. 223 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:58,560 I think she was coached to look like she was drinking it so someone could post it on TikTok 224 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:02,560 and they knew that the masses, the idiots, would all rub over this. 225 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:07,560 Go, oh my God, look at this. This little girl is drinking this. Isn't that terrible? 226 00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:13,560 Oh no, it's the poor thing. She's going to be an alcoholic by the time she's seven or whatever. 227 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:19,560 I can see it now. Someone knew that people are dumb in masses and they knew that if they put it up on, 228 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:25,560 this is my opinion, if they put it up on TikTok, then idiots would watch it in droves 229 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,560 and they would show their friends and they show the people at work 230 00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:31,560 and they would show the people down at the salon and everyone would go, 231 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:35,560 oh no, why are they letting her do that? Yeah. 232 00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:39,560 Anyhow, that's my thought on all of that. 233 00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:43,560 So now we go to Brett Favre. 234 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:48,560 Brett Favre announced he has Parkinson's. 235 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:53,560 Yeah, I pretty much believe he was concussed quite a bit. 236 00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:58,560 I think that there is probably a definite connection between the two from what I can tell, 237 00:20:58,560 --> 00:21:02,560 from what I've seen, from what I've known. 238 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:06,560 I mean, not all Parkinson's is like that. I mean, it's genetic too. 239 00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:12,560 But I do think that there's something to people that get concussed, not only CTE, but also Parkinson's. 240 00:21:12,560 --> 00:21:16,560 And I'm not sure if it's Park A or Park B. There's different types. 241 00:21:16,560 --> 00:21:20,560 But I forgot which one of them is kind of linked to it right now. 242 00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,560 But I'm saying if you keep, they're going to keep doing studies, 243 00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:30,560 they're going to find out that there is a direct correlation between head trauma and Parkinson's. 244 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:38,560 And also I think that some park is caused on by maybe like dementia too from alcoholism can do it too. 245 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:45,560 Now, not all of these are. I've known people that never really dropped a touch of booze in their life. 246 00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:51,560 Get Parkinson's and it is genetic. Doctors say it's genetic too. 247 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:59,560 So anyhow, Brett Favre of having Parkinson's, yeah, that sucks. 248 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:05,560 I don't appreciate his involvement in that whole deal down there in Louisiana trying to get, 249 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:13,560 I think, as a soccer stadium or a volleyball stadium or something at the school that his girl was going to allegedly. 250 00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:18,560 And this money evidently was allocated to the poor. 251 00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:27,560 And he did something like was like trying to champion getting the money or something when he seemingly knew it was for the poor. 252 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:31,560 So I'm saying this right here. And all this is allegedly. 253 00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:36,560 And I still like Brett Favre. I just don't like what he did here at all. 254 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:45,560 You know, I mean, he has some shady stuff. Remember the famous famous Weenie Gate picks at the New York Jets trainer or whatever? 255 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:50,560 His unceremoniously slamming the door out of Green Bay. 256 00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:57,560 There's been some stuff that were was very questionable. 257 00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:04,560 The last game he played at Minnesota in the championship game where he could have ran for the first down, 258 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:10,560 but he chose to pass and get intercepted. I thought that was to me that was ego related. 259 00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:14,560 Like I could run and get it, but I'm going to show everybody I want to pass it over and win this thing. 260 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:18,560 In my opinion, he's like, I'm Brett Favre. I'm going to do this. Watch this. 261 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:25,560 And it cost him the game, the championship and a shot. Another shot at the Super Bowl. 262 00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:38,560 But anyhow, he kind of looks like maybe he threw his influence around or something to and allegedly he knew this money was going to go to the poor. 263 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:46,560 It was tax money. And instead of going to the ultra poor, which there's a lot of them in Louisiana, I think it might have been Mississippi. 264 00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:54,560 There's a lot of them in Mississippi that are really poor. It's not that affluent of a state. It's a very poor state. 265 00:23:54,560 --> 00:24:08,560 And this was money allotted to help them that he chose to try to get a volleyball or soccer stadium of the school, the high school that his girl was attending, his little girl. 266 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:18,560 To me, that's pretty wrong, especially when you have a bank account probably the size of his. 267 00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:24,560 If you really want that to happen, why don't you make that happen? Or why don't you do some fundraisers? 268 00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:28,560 Do a couple of fundraisers. Say, hey, I'm Brett Favre. I'm going to be here signing this stuff. 269 00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:32,560 And if you want it, here's a couple of auctions you can get it at. 270 00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:46,560 You know, he could have shot. He could have signed 30 jerseys and helmets, wrote little messages on them or maybe an afternoon with Brett where you go get some barbecue and sit out on a picnic bench and talk football. 271 00:24:46,560 --> 00:25:02,560 I mean, there's all types of things he could have done except trying to throw his influence to get this soccer field or volleyball, I think is volleyball, volleyball field made with this tax money. 272 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:09,560 So I don't have a whole lot of respect for that. And I don't appreciate that to people really in need. 273 00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:28,560 You know, people that were starving, people that maybe their children couldn't have shoes, maybe they didn't have running water, you know, but, you know, a volleyball field instead, especially when you have the means to me, the way I see it, allegedly, and the way I feel. 274 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:46,560 And my opinion is this right here, when you can do a couple of fundraisers and probably get that money like that, but you choose not to do that and you choose to try to try to allegedly throw your influence around and get money that's allotted to the poor instead the ultra poor. 275 00:25:46,560 --> 00:26:01,560 That to me is wrong. And I don't think I care for a person that does that very much. Like I said, a lot of the shine of him is gone. 276 00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:07,560 He's been kind of found out on a lot of different issues. 277 00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:20,560 Wasn't his wife battling cancer when this Weenie Gate stuff came out, maybe I thought, or something like that. That to me is real shady, allegedly, if all that did happen. 278 00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:28,560 I don't know. I just think that it's probably not a guy that you think is highly of. 279 00:26:28,560 --> 00:26:32,560 So, anyhow. 280 00:26:32,560 --> 00:26:40,560 Somewhere in the heavens, your great Grammy Gertrude is crying because her little Bebo is listening to this film. 281 00:26:40,560 --> 00:26:47,560 Your mom is so scatterbrained. It took her two hours to watch 60 minutes. 282 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:57,560 Two dish bags and microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh. We offer you first world problems. 283 00:26:57,560 --> 00:27:02,560 Damn it! The city services website is down again. 284 00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:09,560 I can't believe this. I'm going to have to actually call and talk to someone to pay my damn trash bill. 285 00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:11,560 This is ridiculous. 286 00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:19,560 Now this is interesting. There seems to be somewhat of a feud, I guess, if you will, between the younger bands and the older bands. 287 00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:23,560 And in one case, the first time this happened is an X against a boomer band. 288 00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:29,560 Megadeth is firmly an X, Generation X band, and Peter Frampton is firmly a boomer band. 289 00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:33,560 But now there's a Journey controversy too, and I'll get to it here. 290 00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:37,560 The classic rockers have it out for the metal bands, or vice versa. 291 00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:44,560 Earlier this month, Peter Frampton called out Megadeth for getting his Richmond show canceled by damaging the venue during their sound check. 292 00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:50,560 Megadeth strongly disputed that claim, accusing Frampton of talking out of his ass. 293 00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:57,560 Now Journey's Neil Shown has blamed Avenged Sevenfold for his band's messy recent performance. 294 00:27:57,560 --> 00:28:11,560 At the Brazilian music festival Rock in Rio two weekends back, Journey's set was marred by extremely choppy vocals from frontman Arnel Paneda, or Panada, or whatever it is, who took over for Steve Perry in 2007. 295 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:18,560 The backlash was loud enough that Panada got on Facebook and offered to quit the band if fans voted him out. 296 00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:22,560 Mentally and emotionally, I've suffered already and I'm still suffering, he wrote. 297 00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:29,560 Implicitly calling on Journey fans to either seize the chance to oust him or shut up with their criticism. 298 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:42,560 Shown, the only remaining member that's original from Journey, is not having any of that, and a pair of his own Facebook posts Shown came up with Panada's defense in somewhat contradictory ways. 299 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:52,560 One post includes footage of a celebrity crowd at the fest writing, all this is absolute garbage fabricated bullshit that the AP does. 300 00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:59,560 Associated Press. Does this look like nobody having a good time? I'm asking you. All fabricated, owned and bought blogs. Bullshit. 301 00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:14,560 In a separate post he explains that Journey were extremely limited by the night's headliners, Avenged Sevenfold, which seems that hardly any sound could get through the PA to the audience and he said it was a bullshit move. 302 00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:21,560 In the middle of that post, Shown pivots back to arguing about the show went off without a hitch and the audience had a great time. 303 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:34,560 We eagerly await Avenged Sevenfold's press release. This should be interesting because it seems to be boomers against whoever, whether it's Xers or millennials. 304 00:29:34,560 --> 00:29:42,560 I believe that Avenged Sevenfold is definitely a millennial band, it is not an Xer band. By the time they came around I gave no shit about it. 305 00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:53,560 It was kind of like, okay, I like what I like and I don't want anything else, I don't need anything else in my life. And most people that I know feel the same way. 306 00:29:53,560 --> 00:30:04,560 This article was taken from Stereogum.com, which is a music online publication, I do believe, and we thank you for that. 307 00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:14,560 And then I go into, you know, I've been all over Eric Adams, the fine mayor in New York, and telling you about his trash cans that he's so happy about. 308 00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:25,560 And his rat infested, allegedly, apartments that he allegedly won't clean up. New York City Mayor Eric Adams has been charged with... 309 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:31,560 Let's see, how many counts? Five counts. Oh boy, this is going to get good. 310 00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:39,560 Okay, Damian Williams, a U.S. attorney in Manhattan, said Adams accepted over $100,000 in luxury travel benefits. 311 00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:46,560 The mayor insisted he was innocent, saying at a news conference, I asked New Yorkers to wait to hear our defense. 312 00:30:46,560 --> 00:31:07,560 Hmm. Here's the latest on the mayor's indictment. Mayor Eric Adams has been indicted on five federal charges of bribery, fraud, and soliciting illegal foreign campaign donations that prosecutors said began when he was a top elected official in Brooklyn and continued after he became mayor. 313 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:25,560 The indictment, which was unsealed on Thursday morning following an investigation that started in 2021, has focused at least in part on whether he conspired with the Turkish government to receive illegal foreign campaign contributions and whether he took official actions on his behalf. 314 00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:30,560 Turkey, huh? Hmm. 315 00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:38,560 Ending the news conference, Strauber agreed anyone who knows of illegal contact by any New York City official to contact her office. 316 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:45,560 We handled this investigation as we would any other following the facts and seeking to hold wrongdoers accountable. 317 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:57,560 No matter their role or title, she said, our unique access to city records and expertise in matters of city government make us a critical partner in the fight to root out corruption. 318 00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:11,560 So, huh, sounds like he's having some more problems, huh? So, hmm, who'da thunk? But he's the guy that came up with the plastic trash bins, right? Yeah, you know, the ones that he's so proud of. 319 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:15,560 Boy, that guy's a fucking genius. 320 00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:18,560 Jim X. 321 00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:20,560 What the hell happened? 322 00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:26,560 You were the generation of change. 323 00:32:26,560 --> 00:32:28,560 You never wanted to be one of them. 324 00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:29,560 At the field. 325 00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:32,560 Spoke for you. 326 00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:33,560 Hunk the man. 327 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:35,560 Hunk the system. 328 00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:38,560 What the hell happened? 329 00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:40,560 The generation of angst. 330 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:43,560 The generation of noncompliance. 331 00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:45,560 Is now buying a boat. 332 00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:50,560 You're really fed up until someone dangled a dollar near you. 333 00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:55,560 Great job, Xers. Everything's ruined. 334 00:32:55,560 --> 00:33:17,560 Tomorrow morning while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte, remember to not get your genitals caught in a grinder. It really hurts. Who can afford plastic surgery? Stay safe, everyone. 335 00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:26,560 Looks like this. England has the shin kicking championships going on right now. 336 00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:29,560 Here are the rules of shin kicking. 337 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:38,560 So you think you're wasting time? Anytime you think you're wasting time scratching your nuts, watching reruns of Three's Company. No. 338 00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,560 These guys are wasting time. 339 00:33:41,560 --> 00:33:44,560 Rules of shin kicking. 340 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:52,560 Competitors will be assigned bouts at random with winners of all rounds gaining entry to a final bout. 341 00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:56,560 Usually there will be a maximum of 12 contestants. 342 00:33:56,560 --> 00:34:04,560 Equipment. Competitors must wear long trousers or tracksuits and may cushion their shins by using straw that is provided. 343 00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:09,560 They will be provided with white coats representing the traditional shepherd's mock. 344 00:34:09,560 --> 00:34:17,560 Footwear may be trainer shoes or soft toed or reinforced boots. I think that's what I'd wear. 345 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:23,560 Any form of metal reinforced toe on footwear is expressly forbidden. I bet. 346 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:33,560 This will be checked both before and after your bouts. Failure to comply will result in instant exclusion and barring from future events. 347 00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:42,560 Stance. A competitor begins by holding his or her opponent by the shoulders with arms straight. 348 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:50,560 The contest will be started, finished if necessary and judged by an arbiter known as a stickler. 349 00:34:50,560 --> 00:34:58,560 The stickler decides the fairness of a contest. A contest is decided by the best of three throws. 350 00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:09,560 Two successful throws results in a win. So a throw is I believe like a round I guess. Probably an increment of time. 351 00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:14,560 The aim is... Okay so here is how to shin kick successfully. 352 00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:18,560 The aim is to weaken an opponent by kicking his or her shins. 353 00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:27,560 Once the legs have been weakened a competitor may throw an opponent off the ground off balance over a leg provided that the grasp of the shoulders is kept. 354 00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:33,560 A successful throw involves unbalancing the opponent in the course of a kick. 355 00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:39,560 It does not involve kicking the opponent to the ground nor pushing the opponent to the ground. 356 00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:45,560 Shins must be kicked before a throw can be achieved. Contact must be made. 357 00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:51,560 A throw is not valid unless a thrower is in the process of kicking and has one foot off the ground. 358 00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:59,560 If the stickler deems that the kicker has made an intentional trip the throw gets to the opponent. 359 00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:08,560 So you'll forfeit that throw. If a kick is above the knee the throw goes to the opponent. Again you forfeit the throw. 360 00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:11,560 The first person to hit the ground loses the throw. 361 00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:22,560 The stickler's decision is final and not up for negotiation or screaming, yelling or intimidation. 362 00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:35,560 So there you go. You think you're wasting time? Maybe. As much as this? Probably not. 363 00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:44,560 And now for the good old head funch darlings. FTX fraudster Carolyn Ellison, sentenced to two years in prison. 364 00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:52,560 Big bad two years. Ordered to forfeit 11 billion which is nice. Good. Let her give it up. How about giving it to the victims? 365 00:36:52,560 --> 00:37:03,560 Caroline Ellison, the star witness in the prosecution of FTX founder Sam Bankman Freid, was sentenced in New York Federal Court. 366 00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:09,560 He might be fried in Manhattan to two years in prison and ordered to forfeit 11 billion. 367 00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:22,560 Ellison, who ran the Alameda Research hedge fund affiliated with FTX, agreed to a plea deal in December 2022, month after cryptocurrency exchange spiraled into bankruptcy. 368 00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:35,560 Judge Lewis Kaplan said a literal get out of jail free card I can't agree to as he sentenced Ellison while praising her extensive cooperation. Yeah she had no choice. Fuck. 369 00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:43,560 Caroline Ellison, the star witness in the prosecution of her former boyfriend FTX founder Sam Bankman Freid, was sentenced Tuesday in New York Federal Court. 370 00:37:43,560 --> 00:37:53,560 Two years in prison and ordered to forfeit 11 billion for a role in a massive fraud and conspiracy that doomed the cryptocurrency exchange once valued at 32 billion. 371 00:37:53,560 --> 00:37:59,560 So there is a whole just of what happened. It took down the cryptocurrency. 372 00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:07,560 The prison term was significantly stiffer than the recommendation by the Federal Probation Department that Judge Lewis Kaplan sentenced Ellison, 373 00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:15,560 who had run the hedge fund Alameda Research, to three years as supervised release with no time at all behind bars. 374 00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:20,560 Defense lawyers also had requested a no prison sentence for Ellison. 375 00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:31,560 Alameda received much of the eight billion in consumer funds looted by Bankman Freid from FTX and stolen money was used for Alameda's trading operation for other purposes. 376 00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:40,560 So do you see a problem here? Whenever these elite get in trouble, they don't really get in trouble. 377 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:49,560 And who knows if in my opinion who knows if they even give back that 11 billion. You know it might be a wink wink nudge nudge deal right? 378 00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:59,560 Well this is complete bullshit. People like this should be thrown in jail just like anybody down the road that goes into a bank and grabs and has a gun 379 00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:05,560 and says give me all your money. Same thing just done on a little bit different level and a little bit different system. 380 00:39:05,560 --> 00:39:11,560 So there's no difference between it. What they're doing is they're stealing something that's not theirs and it's a large amount. 381 00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:16,560 Matter of fact if they went and robbed a bank they probably won't get over 10 grand anyhow. 382 00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:22,560 These people, how many billions do they, how many lives do they ruin just destroying cryptocurrency? 383 00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:30,560 It's ridiculous. I mean people ought to go to the courthouse here and raise hell about this. 384 00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:37,560 Yeah so to me it looks like another case of the elite protecting the elite. 385 00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:47,560 And how many people now while we're speaking on how many people now that used to have their big smile sitting right next to Diddy now they don't want anything to do with that. 386 00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:54,560 Oh no no no no I wasn't friends with them. Bullshit. There's 500 photos of you and them cheesing it up. 387 00:39:54,560 --> 00:40:05,560 So complete bullshit. Anyhow in my opinion what are they really covering up now that they got this big bad thing going on? 388 00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:09,560 Always seems like there's a diversion doesn't there? 389 00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:15,560 That's what I think. You know what I promise never get in politics on this thing so I will stop it right there. 390 00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:21,560 Dick jokes. That's right. That's what I do here. Used to be we. 391 00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:41,560 Okay so you had a stoplight and some dickhead in front of you isn't going and the reason is you see him looking at their phone trying to make a funny on Facebook or something or post a TikTok video of him in there I don't know whistling or something or doing something except driving. 392 00:40:41,560 --> 00:40:48,560 Well Forbes did a little thing here about the worst drivers in the country. 393 00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:57,560 New Mexico tops the list of states with the worst drivers while Massachusetts is home of the best drivers in the country. 394 00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:09,560 Five of the top ten states with the worst drivers are located in the south including Texas Oklahoma Louisiana Kentucky and Mississippi and I believe Kansas is in there too. 395 00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:19,560 Six of the top ten states with the best drivers are in the northeast including Massachusetts New Hampshire Connecticut New York New Jersey and Rhode Island. 396 00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:27,560 Mississippi has a highest total number of fatal car accidents 31.5. 397 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:53,560 Okay it's per 100,000 31.95 per 100,000 licensed drivers Montana has the highest number of drunk drivers involved in fatal crashes 9.22 per 100,000 licensed drivers in New Mexico has the highest number of fatal car accidents including a distract involving a distracted driver 10.6 per 100,000 license drivers. 398 00:41:53,560 --> 00:42:02,560 Interesting huh? So let's see what else anything of note here okay. 399 00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:22,560 So here we go here's a list states with the worst drivers New Mexico is number one Wyoming is number two Texas is number three Oklahoma is number four Montana is number five number six is Louisiana number seven is Kentucky number eight is Kansas. 400 00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:27,560 Number nine is Mississippi and I'll bet all of them are in Johnson County. 401 00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:30,560 All right, and anyone around here knows what I'm talking about. 402 00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:34,560 Eight is Kansas nine is Mississippi and 10 is Missouri. 403 00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:44,560 Missouri ranks fourth highest for the number of fatal car accidents involving a driver who's driving too fast for conditions, speeding or racing. 404 00:42:44,560 --> 00:43:01,560 Yeah, we know this people that live here know this. The state also has a seventh highest number of fatal car accidents involving a driver who disobeyed traffic signs, traffic signals, or a traffic officer 1.38 per 100,000 licensed drivers. 405 00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:10,560 It holds the 10th highest number of drunk drivers involving a fatal car accident 6.2 per 100,000 licensed drivers. 406 00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:19,560 So there you all go little list of the the dumb asses of the driving realm. 407 00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:25,560 More annoying than a 3am piss boner. 408 00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:28,560 Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark. 409 00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:33,560 I should have never taught that damn dog how to read. 410 00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:50,560 You watch the news. It was grim. Is an apocalypse inevitable? We suggest you download all our podcasts beforehand and have multiple mobile chargers. We have the post apocalypse list. 411 00:43:50,560 --> 00:44:07,560 Learn your soils. You will need drinking and bath water. You must build a reservoir. The key to hold water in the ground or the clays you have at its base. Research water purification methods and wild game will attract to the water as well. 412 00:44:07,560 --> 00:44:11,560 Your mama's so fat she went out in high heels and struck oil. 413 00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:20,560 Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity. 414 00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:34,560 I will question that my mom told me to not burn trash for the beginning. 415 00:44:34,560 --> 00:44:50,560 Well, you know, I got a I got a neat little story here about a little prank that me and Davey, my friend that I refer to often. Oh, yes. Played in the old banister mall. Remember that? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Boy, that was a that was an area for a lot of fucking fun. 416 00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:54,560 We used to get away with murder at that place. We've done the stupidest shit. 417 00:44:54,560 --> 00:45:05,560 Well, there's a security guard little short little fucker, little kind of little dumpy little guy named Sam. And he hated us long hair. We're in there getting all the chicks and he didn't fucking like it. 418 00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:12,560 Sam used to always try to get me kicked out and Davey too, but more me. He really hated me for some reason. 419 00:45:12,560 --> 00:45:22,560 So he always threw at me. He got me kicked out for about two weeks. Then we went to court and the judge said you can't kick him out. It's a public mall. 420 00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:33,560 Yeah. So anyhow, you know, one of the biggest ways to sell the hoax is to we found this out was to have a setup guy that no one knew. 421 00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:42,560 Just a guy to confirm what you're saying. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did see that monkey over there. Yeah. Last I saw him, he was on top of that building. 422 00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:53,560 You know, he was throwing shit at somebody. The random witness. You see, we're in the way. Yes. Yes. So this guy. OK, this is a banister mall. 423 00:45:53,560 --> 00:46:03,560 Early 1980s. Me and my good buddy Davey were hanging out and there were crazy long hairs that the average teen would follow, you know, because we're long hairs. 424 00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:12,560 And we're kind of like the Pied Piper teens. Yeah. People like used to look at us and go, well, there's the party. Let's just follow them around until they go to it. 425 00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:20,560 I've done that. Yeah. They used to do it all the time. We'd be like, where are you guys going? Cleveland, Ohio? No, Missouri. 426 00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:26,560 That guy looks like he might have beer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they just start following us. And that's just the way we were. 427 00:46:26,560 --> 00:46:34,560 And then we'd all introduce the day. Hey, I'm so and so. I'm so and so. You know, we'd have a good time. Cleveland Lake or something. Yeah. 428 00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:44,560 You know, slamming beers, doing stupid shit. So Davey and I had certain buddies that would walk up and hear the bullshit that was spewing and then help seal the deal. 429 00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:51,560 You know, they'd sell it completely. You know, one guy that walked around to help us was a punker named Jason. 430 00:46:51,560 --> 00:46:59,560 Jason was really cool because he looked like the type of guy that wouldn't like us. But we got to talking to him. 431 00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:07,560 And we saw eye to eye on everything except music. Everything else, we were the same. Fuck society. Fuck the average guy. 432 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:14,560 Fuck this. Fuck that. You know, but when it came to music, you know, we're like fucking listening to Motley Crue and shit like that. 433 00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:26,560 And he was listening to, I don't know, the Ramones or even deeper than that, you know, Dead Kennedys, the Germs. Television. 434 00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:38,560 Yeah. Yeah. He was a real punker. So he had an orange mohawk or black spike leather. 435 00:47:38,560 --> 00:47:45,560 And Doc Martens. So, I mean, you know, you got the guy, right? You know, you know who I'm talking about. 436 00:47:45,560 --> 00:47:52,560 So great guy, though. I'd love to know what happened to him. So Jason, if you happen to hear this abortion, please. 437 00:47:52,560 --> 00:48:04,560 Oh, I guess that's a bad word now, isn't it? This atrocity. If you happen to hear this horrible atrocity, then, you know, hey, send us an email. 438 00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:12,560 I forgot what the valid email is. We put so many bullshit ones out there. We can't remember our real one. 439 00:48:12,560 --> 00:48:17,560 There is a valid one and I can't remember what the hell it is. 440 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:22,560 We also have an actual real phone number. Hell if I know that one either. 441 00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:29,560 Yeah, so I can't even remember the real one. So show prep. Yeah. 442 00:48:29,560 --> 00:48:36,560 Here I was talking about show prep and making a big deal out of it. I can't even remember our email. 443 00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:43,560 So, anyhow, meanwhile, there's this one security guard named Sam that I kind of alluded to or actually went into a little bit. 444 00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:47,560 Sam was a jealous little pussy bitch. 445 00:48:47,560 --> 00:48:52,560 He constantly tried to get me kicked out and barred from all and like I said earlier, he did for a while for a couple of weeks. 446 00:48:52,560 --> 00:49:00,560 And we went to court. I got back in which really fumed his ass because every time I see him, I was like overzealous about it. 447 00:49:00,560 --> 00:49:03,560 Hi, Sam. How are you? 448 00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:08,560 You came over for dinner tonight, little guy. A little tiny bit of authority and it's gone. 449 00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:16,560 You look cute today. I beeped his nose one time. He about went unglued. 450 00:49:16,560 --> 00:49:21,560 So, you know, me and David used to play moon tricks on Sam Costic. 451 00:49:21,560 --> 00:49:24,560 Sounds like he deserved it. Oh, he did, you know. 452 00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:29,560 So we quickly went to Jason to be the casual guy walking by to sell it. 453 00:49:29,560 --> 00:49:36,560 So Jason's over in the corner where the movie theaters upstairs used to be because then they went downstairs for a while and then they disappeared. 454 00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:40,560 Oh, yeah. Yeah, they used to be upstairs, mid upstairs. 455 00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:44,560 So I think right across from food court maybe, if I remember correctly. 456 00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:50,560 Now in my mind, I'm getting confused with Ward Parkway because their movie theater shifted around a bit too. 457 00:49:50,560 --> 00:49:59,560 OK, well, anyhow, this is when they were upstairs because I remember that part well because people were coming in to go to movies and were screwing with them. 458 00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:02,560 So, yeah. So David and I set this one up perfectly. 459 00:50:02,560 --> 00:50:10,560 You know, we had a buddy that he won a backstage pass to Great White. 460 00:50:10,560 --> 00:50:15,560 Oh, remember them? It's a video shoot. OK, as an extra. Oh, that'd be cool. 461 00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:21,560 Yeah. And he was in it. I don't know if it was once bit or something else, but he was in it. 462 00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:24,560 So and then on the back was stamped used. 463 00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:30,560 Yeah. But on the front, it had an MTV logo. It didn't have a specific band. 464 00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:35,560 It just had it didn't say Great White. It just said extra for MTV video shoot. 465 00:50:35,560 --> 00:50:40,560 And I remember really well it was green with an orange MTV on it with her famous logo. 466 00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:49,560 Yeah, it was really cool looking. And it was like made with some sort of a some sort of a really thick paper. 467 00:50:49,560 --> 00:50:54,560 And it was engraved, I guess. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was raised. It felt great. 468 00:50:54,560 --> 00:51:01,560 It felt like the seal of some embossed paper, raised printing, raised printing, whatever makes a lot harder to counterfeit. 469 00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:05,560 Plus, it makes it look cool. So our friend agreed to let us borrow this for a little while. 470 00:51:05,560 --> 00:51:10,560 We got it back to him, like we said, we didn't we didn't tear it up or steal it or nothing. 471 00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:16,560 So they start waving the card in the air and making fun of me because he got this and I did. 472 00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:21,560 He was like, hey, I'm going to be on this. I'm going to be on this whatever. 473 00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:27,560 You know, yeah. So he's waving around going out to be on the video and you're not because you're too stupid. 474 00:51:27,560 --> 00:51:30,560 You couldn't win. And all this stuff. 475 00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:36,560 So this magical card was supposed to be a freebie to be an extra on the set of MTV. 476 00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:41,560 This is what we set it up to be right. A list of hundreds of bands. 477 00:51:41,560 --> 00:51:45,560 The secret MTV guy walking around when he was walking around the mall. 478 00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:54,560 And this was going to be Sam eventually. So the secret MTV guy that has these free magical passes was Sam, only he didn't know it. 479 00:51:54,560 --> 00:52:00,560 So Davey's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm like, fucking asshole. Yeah, all this stuff. 480 00:52:00,560 --> 00:52:06,560 So automatically, see people get ready to walk in, right? Get ready to go to movies. 481 00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:10,560 Yeah, just like magnetic. They're just staring at us. 482 00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:15,560 And Davey's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And all this stuff. Man, that sucks, man. You get to go and I don't. 483 00:52:15,560 --> 00:52:20,560 So Davey is waving this around, making fun of me and Jason will walk by. 484 00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:27,560 They go, yeah, I fucking 112. I threw it at him because there's no punk bands on it. Fuck that. I don't want to go. 485 00:52:27,560 --> 00:52:32,560 So all of a sudden, these kids are fucking coming over there. What was this? 486 00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:36,560 So that's so clever. Oh, yeah. 487 00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:46,560 We set it up perfect. So the reason the reason that we picked Sam to do this, we to do this on that day was because we had the card for a couple of days. 488 00:52:46,560 --> 00:52:50,560 He's wearing plain clothes and I guess he thought he's going to catch top lifters or something. 489 00:52:50,560 --> 00:52:54,560 Not wearing this little fucking bitch outfit that he normally wore. 490 00:52:54,560 --> 00:53:02,560 You know, so Jason, instead of us goes, yeah, that fucking little douche right there is the one that's the secret MTV guy. 491 00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:12,560 We didn't even say it. He did it. It sold it even more because all these teams are like, you know, fucking their heads but around and they're staring at them. 492 00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:18,560 So Jason said, yeah, he goes, yeah, I bit him on the ear to get one. 493 00:53:18,560 --> 00:53:28,560 So the story was, was this, the more outrageous you were, the more likely you were to get a free pass. 494 00:53:28,560 --> 00:53:38,560 Yeah. So automatically he had like 50 teams jumping in front of him, fucking biting his ear, kicking him in the ass. 495 00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:44,560 One guy was clucking like a chicken in the space. Another guy's like, look, look, look, I'm a bird. 496 00:53:44,560 --> 00:53:52,560 Some guy fucking jumped off to one side. Another guy ripped off one of the trees and hit him with a switch. 497 00:53:52,560 --> 00:53:59,560 And Sam was just fucking freaking out, man. He's like, what the fuck? And we're like, we want a pass. We want a pass. 498 00:53:59,560 --> 00:54:08,560 This probably went on for fucking 25 minutes. He was losing his mind. Yes, he was. He didn't know what was going on. 499 00:54:08,560 --> 00:54:14,560 He'd get 10 teams away from him, right? And then you have 10 more teams attacking. 500 00:54:14,560 --> 00:54:23,560 So we leave. We let this go on and let it go downhill. And those teams told another one, get the pass from that fucker. He didn't give us anything. 501 00:54:23,560 --> 00:54:30,560 So this just kept rolling on and rolling on and rolling on. So we come back a couple of hours later. 502 00:54:30,560 --> 00:54:34,560 We went to, oh, no, I know what we did. We went to Andy's Santa Fe and had a burrito. 503 00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:39,560 I remember that. We weren't even old enough to drink, but we still did because they never carted there. 504 00:54:39,560 --> 00:54:44,560 We both had margaritas. We were fucking laughing at our feet on the table and shit. 505 00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:50,560 Davey had fucking flip flops on. So they eventually got mad and kicked us out because you could see his toenails hanging out. 506 00:54:50,560 --> 00:54:58,560 People didn't like that. So, hey, we get back in. Also, we see Sam coming by all the shovels. 507 00:54:58,560 --> 00:55:06,560 By this time, everything was gone. It was all said and done. I go, hey, Sam, do you want to know where all that came from? 508 00:55:06,560 --> 00:55:12,560 Davey pulled out the cart and said, see this? I go, yeah, you just been had, bitch. Oh, he was fucking furious. 509 00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:17,560 He turned right up. You motherfucker, I'm going to get you out of here. I'm going to get you guys kicked out for good. 510 00:55:17,560 --> 00:55:26,560 I go, what for? I didn't do anything to get some all. We didn't get kicked out. 511 00:55:26,560 --> 00:55:33,560 That was one of the best fucking breaks we ever played. I just thought about it the other day. I'm like, my God. 512 00:55:33,560 --> 00:55:39,560 There are some other ones I got to remember that we did to him too. 513 00:55:39,560 --> 00:55:47,560 And then I got another one. You listen to the solo cast, right? I'm going to tell the story about the nut buyer. 514 00:55:47,560 --> 00:55:54,560 Oh, yes. Oh, gosh. Oh, no. Looks like the show's over, kids. 515 00:55:54,560 --> 00:56:09,560 Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic. Fear not, assholes. They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.