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And now it's time for the Daily Douchebag Lunch.

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Two Douchebags and a Microphone Pledge.

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I Joe or Jane Listener hereby promise to download every show.

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I Joe or Jane Listener hereby promise to grab family members phones and download the show

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from there.

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I Joe or Jane Listener hereby promise to go to public computers and download the show

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from there.

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I Joe or Jane Listener hereby promise to laugh at all the unfunny jokes.

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I Joe or Jane Listener hereby promise to lie to all my friends and tell them how good the

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show is.

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And finally I Joe or Jane Listener promise to visit Montrose, Missouri to take advantage

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of the power plant, campgrounds and junkyard all within its quarter mile radius.

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Here at Two Douchebags and a Microphone we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.

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Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong.

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At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys.

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We can and will lie if it makes the story better.

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Two Douchebags and a Microphone.

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We Talk.

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And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.

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If you melt dry ice in a pool, can you swim without getting wet?

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I may never know.

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Two Douchebags and a Microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.

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We offer you first world problems.

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My driver's license picture makes me look older.

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I'm calling a lawyer.

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Two Douchebags and a Microphone invade your ear holes in.

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Hey, who took a dump in the cooler?

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Two Douchebags and a Microphone.

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I'm Mark.

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And I'm Rob.

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Rob, I got a question to ask you.

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I didn't ask you off air, but I want to ask you on this program.

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Did you listen to the last podcast that I put up this morning?

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Not the one you put up this morning.

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Okay.

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The last two were repeat.

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So I know I did.

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I took that down.

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I found out at work and I was like, oh shit.

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Anyhow, I corrected it as soon as I got home and hopefully not.

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I should have been the one to say something, but I didn't.

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No, no, no.

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It's okay.

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You know what?

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I mean, it's free.

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Okay.

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So you got it.

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You got a repeat.

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Just wait till another one comes out.

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That's what I did.

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And actually, that was a good show.

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It was a good show.

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Well, I did.

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I did something different on this.

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That's right.

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It's so good.

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We had to air it twice.

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Um, I did something different on this last one.

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What I did was is instead of putting the best of, I did a narration of these bits and where

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they came from.

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Like my first one was strange insults from an alien.

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I told how that came from and how I accidentally sped up the audio when I was telling a strange

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insult and I believe it was a, may your mother leave your room or your house.

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I think, may your mother leave your house.

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And once she leaves, she leaves the door slightly ajar.

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So you have to get up and close it.

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It just started out as strange insults, but anyhow, it was going to be some name completely

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different and goofy.

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And I accidentally sped up the audio on it and it sounded like an alien.

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I'm like, you know what?

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I'm going to go with strange insults from an alien.

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And then the reason that alien has all different kinds of sounds, you know, he's got a low

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tone, he's got a high tone, he's got a weird tone is because I don't know of anyone that

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talked to an alien so they can't tell me what they sound like.

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So I'm covering all bases.

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And then I, where deep thoughts came up, apocalypse, all that stuff.

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And I just kind of narrate and I put two or three of the, what I consider the best ones

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on there.

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And I did that for about a half hour last night and strung them all together.

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And I think it was pretty good, but I want someone else's opinion to go, you know what?

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I did like that.

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Or you know what?

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Next time.

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And I mean, honest opinion next time, throw on a best stuff.

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Okay.

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I did.

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And anyhow, so you didn't hear it.

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So it doesn't matter.

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But when you hear it, I want to hear your honest opinion.

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If you think I should throw on a best stuff, let me know.

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You're not going to hurt my feelings.

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So all right.

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Anyhow, a video circulated on social media Thursday of Las Vegas Raiders safety, Trey

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Taylor holding a Kermit the frog doll, Donnie and Mahomes Jersey and a wig meant to mock

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the Corbett quarterbacks here.

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Was you going to tell this story?

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No, no, go ahead.

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Go ahead.

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I left it for you.

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Okay.

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All right.

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First off, I gave them a D minus for originality.

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Oh, no, don't bust us up with that old Patrick Mahomes sound like Kermit the frog gimmick.

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Who has not?

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That has been going around since day one.

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He is admittedly.

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Oh, yeah.

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I sound like Kermit the frog.

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They used to joke with him all the time in school.

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So this dimwit from the Raiders comes up and has a little, a little puppet that he thinks

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funny.

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You know, if it was funny, I give him credit, but it wasn't funny because why don't you

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come up with something original?

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Well, he can't really find anything to dog him on.

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So he's got, Oh, he sounds like Kermit the frog.

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Ha ha.

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No, it didn't work.

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Dumb shit.

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As a matter of fact, you look stupider than you do when you start an article wall ago.

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Just saying.

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Uh huh.

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Go ahead.

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Patrick Mahomes acknowledged it.

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He's like, okay, guess what?

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You got to face me twice this year, not once, but twice.

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He said something about it will get handled when it get handled.

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So he's going to shove the ball up their ass is what's going to happen.

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So you know, and he also said this, he said, like, I needed more motivation.

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He said, fine.

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So anyhow, remember how well it happened for them when they did their little victory lap

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around Arrowhead Stadium?

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And then we did the ring around the Rosie and scored on them.

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Yeah.

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We shoved that up their ass.

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Well, I look for another one.

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So you know, um, if you're going to make fun of somebody, the best quarterback in play,

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a man that has dominated the whole Western division every since day one, he became a

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starter.

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He has dominated everyone in the Western division and been to the super bowl five out of four

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out of five years.

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No.

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Yeah.

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Four out of five years.

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No.

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Five out of six years.

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And he won three of them.

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So you're going to go after that guy with a Kermit the frog fucking puppet.

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So I know Raider fan Raider fan.

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You thought you ruined Christmas and the rest of the season for us chiefs fans.

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I get it.

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But all it did was wake us up enough to grab another trophy and to top it all off.

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It was won by us, the chiefs on your home turf, the Raiders in Las Vegas.

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We won the super bowl on your home turf.

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After you thought you didn't, you killed us and buried us on Christmas day.

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All you did was wake up a giant.

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How do you feel now Raider fan?

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How do you feel?

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I don't think it's very fucking good.

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And this guy here, this fucking safety, this ball is going to be promptly shoved up your

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ass and I'm going to watch it in real time and I'm going to enjoy it.

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And I don't care.

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They made fun of my homes.

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What I'm saying is, is watch out who you pick on.

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You better watch it out because this guy, my homes doesn't go angrily around and fuck

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that guy or nothing.

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You know what my homes does?

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He shoves a ball up your ass the next time you see it.

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So go ahead and expect it because it's going to happen and you might as well wish us luck

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on our next Western division championship and maybe another super bowl while you guys

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are over there in purgatory trying to figure shit out and get a quarterback.

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Good luck guys.

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So anyhow, you know, Patrick said it best.

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He said, I didn't need any more motivation, but well, see you soon punk asses.

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But my homes didn't say that.

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He didn't say punk asses.

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He just said like I needed any more motivation.

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He didn't need it.

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He didn't need it anymore.

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But you know what?

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He's got more now.

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You tell me that one overhead drive, it is not plastered everywhere.

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What that guy did.

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It is.

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So yeah, I might've, I might've made that part up about punk asses.

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Okay.

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Just to be clear, that might've just been me mouthing off and not Patrick my homes.

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Right Rob?

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Right.

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Might've just been me.

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Right.

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So anyhow, a Canadian Olympic female coach has been kicked out of the sport competitions

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for a supposed spying event that happened during practices.

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The coach allegedly was spying on competitors teams with a drone she was operating.

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Meanwhile, at the chief's mini camp, several drones have been spotted flying over Patrick

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my homes.

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That's right.

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Daddy's back.

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All right.

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Well now, at Costco, there is a new doomsday bucket available.

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It features 80 entrees in size, 30 breakfast servings and 40 drink servings that just need

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water to prepare.

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The meal options range from teriyaki rice, tomato, basil soup and pasta Alfredo to cheesy

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mac and cheese and apple cinnamon cereal.

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So it's not just about survival.

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It's about maintaining a certain normalcy after the apocalypse.

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So Rob, I'm just going to, I'm just going to do this for now on.

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I'm going to have, instead of things you eat during an apocalypse segment, I'm just going

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to go ladies and gentlemen, go to Costco.

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That's it.

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Go get hickory nuts and fuck dandelions.

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That sound about right?

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Yeah.

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I mean stock up man.

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Yeah.

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Stock up.

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Go to Costco.

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Get the.

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Dan pepper.

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Dan pepper.

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Instead of eating dandelions like I'm suggesting and hickory nuts, go to Costco.

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Get three or four of these.

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It would work if you have to.

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But I suggest you buy like 30 of these buckets first.

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And then after you run out of these 30 buckets, then start looking for hickory nuts and dandelions.

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So in Chicago, when a grocery store employee was moving shelves in the storage room, she

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found a corpse that had been wedged in between shelving and a wall.

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The mummified body turned out, I know the mummified body turned out to be a man that

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was missing a little over 10 years ago.

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Oh my God.

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Yeah, I know.

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In the warehouse?

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Yeah.

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It was in the back of a store.

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I have a question.

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Okay.

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What happened to a thing called inventory?

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No one knew how to inventory a dead body.

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Once a year, everybody counts.

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You should see this shit.

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Just saying.

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Okay.

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Here's what I'm saying, Rob.

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I wouldn't know how to inventory a dead body.

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I'm up this week, that's why I'm saying that.

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Yeah, it's like a story.

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You're going through sunflower seeds, you're going through candles, you're going through

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coffee creamer, dead body.

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I don't see it on the list.

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No?

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Yeah.

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You just go right by, go, okay.

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I don't know.

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I don't see it on the list, so it's not there.

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That's a fucked up inventory.

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Yeah it is.

257
00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:18,680
But Chicago has big- That's what it is.

258
00:13:18,680 --> 00:13:20,040
Exactly, that's what it is.

259
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:23,480
No one bothered to ever clean behind the shelf for sure.

260
00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:26,120
And they definitely didn't count anything, that's for sure.

261
00:13:26,120 --> 00:13:29,080
They move a couple of cans of beans, they'd say.

262
00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:30,080
Ten years.

263
00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:31,080
Ten years.

264
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:34,440
His body was mummified because of the circumstances in the room.

265
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:35,440
Yeah.

266
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,200
His body was mummified because of the circumstances in the room.

267
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,760
That's how come they didn't smell like this horrible odor or nothing.

268
00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:47,720
And he was a guy that disappeared ten years ago, and he's mummified behind shelves.

269
00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:52,920
So evidently he bit the big one, he had the, I'm coming little bit.

270
00:13:52,920 --> 00:13:55,920
Or however Red Fox said that.

271
00:13:55,920 --> 00:14:00,000
And he had one of them, he had to grab her back behind the shelves, and no one found

272
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,000
him.

273
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,640
You know, Chicago has big plans for the deceased.

274
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:10,200
When he gets through voting, they can figure out how to plan for him to pay back taxes

275
00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:11,200
too.

276
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:14,040
After he gets done voting.

277
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,160
Come on, Chicago knows what to do with dead people.

278
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:18,160
Yeah.

279
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:23,160
Alright, back taxes for ten years, he's going to want to.

280
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:24,960
We're leaving it right there.

281
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:28,920
Yeah, back taxes for ten years, this guy's going to want to be dead again.

282
00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:35,600
So anyhow, a Chinese military buff somehow buys four books of military secrets for under

283
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:37,560
a dollar.

284
00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:43,640
A military historian in China appears to have made an alarming discovery after picking up

285
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:49,000
four discarded books for less than a dollar at a neighborhood recycling center.

286
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:55,280
He was set to buy Joe Biden's copies, but he hates crayon writing.

287
00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:59,400
Okay.

288
00:14:59,400 --> 00:15:01,680
Joe Biden, he hates crayon writing.

289
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:06,120
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll give you that one.

290
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:07,120
Okay.

291
00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:12,040
So, if you're liberal and you hate that comment, too fucking bad, it's a joke.

292
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:18,800
And we put this at the very first, at the very first of this show, we tell you it's

293
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:19,800
a joke.

294
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:22,040
So if you can't handle the joke, you're in the wrong area.

295
00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:28,480
So to be honest, I'm laughing inside.

296
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,360
Yeah.

297
00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:34,240
So alright.

298
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:35,240
Let's see here.

299
00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:42,840
I got, you want to go into the email of the week that I didn't even read it yet.

300
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:44,800
I just downloaded it because I got it.

301
00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:51,120
I got some email this time featured email the week, Rob and Mark.

302
00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:56,360
How much time on average per week do you and Mark put into the podcast?

303
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:59,160
Thank you, Ronnie and Tulsa.

304
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:01,160
So do you have a?

305
00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:02,160
Okay.

306
00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:03,160
Yeah.

307
00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:09,040
Let me let me calculate this real quick.

308
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:14,480
We figured four hours a week just for the podcast.

309
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,520
Yes.

310
00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:19,360
Okay.

311
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:20,360
Let's see.

312
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:23,200
We do four hours a week just on the podcast.

313
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:29,440
I'm going to say I put in eight to nine hours a week, sometimes a little bit more when I

314
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:34,800
refresh bits or do new ones and stuff like that or come up with different voices or different

315
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:36,160
writings and stuff.

316
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:40,520
I'm going to say actually thinking about I'm going to say I probably put in a solid 10

317
00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:43,360
hours a week on this podcast.

318
00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:44,360
You Rob?

319
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:45,360
Okay.

320
00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:50,360
Well, that's about where I'm at.

321
00:16:50,360 --> 00:17:00,520
Because between saving the articles, reading the articles, going back, you know, and doing

322
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:06,160
the podcast, I'd say 10, 12 hours a week.

323
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:07,160
Okay.

324
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,160
Four shows.

325
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,160
Yeah, I knew you were putting.

326
00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:16,560
Because I do a lot of saving and reading that I don't use.

327
00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:18,760
Yes, I know you do because.

328
00:17:18,760 --> 00:17:21,440
I mean, so I got to count that.

329
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:25,760
You are very particular about the articles that you read because you know the articles

330
00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:28,320
that I go into and it's appreciated.

331
00:17:28,320 --> 00:17:30,600
We don't ever cross over.

332
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:31,880
We rarely cross over.

333
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:33,600
We try not to.

334
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:34,600
Yeah.

335
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,840
Because I don't ask Rob what he's going to talk about.

336
00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:39,000
He doesn't ask me what we're going to talk about.

337
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,200
We think that that works better organically like it has.

338
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:43,960
And the other guy has just.

339
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:46,880
We bring it to you as we are.

340
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:47,880
Yes.

341
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:50,440
I think that that's the way that it happens the best.

342
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:54,760
So Rob and I probably put in 10 hours, maybe a little bit more.

343
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,920
And I think that's safe to say on podcasts.

344
00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:01,160
And Ronnie, thank you for acknowledging that we put a lot of time in.

345
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,160
That's why you asked it.

346
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:03,160
I'm certain.

347
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:04,160
Thank you.

348
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:05,160
Thank you, Ronnie.

349
00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:11,240
Honestly, my hours go longer than that because I save a lot of stuff.

350
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:13,240
The legal on stuff.

351
00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:18,000
Because I think nothing but the podcast.

352
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:24,600
Well, when I'm going through my news page, whatever, I'm thinking about podcasts that

353
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:27,480
I'm saving and deleting and whatever.

354
00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:28,680
Yeah, I do, too.

355
00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:31,560
I know I almost go 20 hours a week.

356
00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:34,080
I bet you I could go 22.

357
00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:35,080
And here's why.

358
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:38,520
I'll be watching the news and a story comes up that I think is interesting.

359
00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:42,400
All of a sudden I'll grab my phone and I'll put it into it and I'll explain what I'm thinking

360
00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:44,040
at the time.

361
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:49,160
So all of those, I bet you I do put in a solid 20 hours of podcasting.

362
00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:55,560
And then these days that I come up with like some more strange insults or news nobody gives

363
00:18:55,560 --> 00:19:00,440
a shit about or something like that, then I probably put in more.

364
00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:05,300
And Rob, I appreciate all the time you put in because I know because of the articles

365
00:19:05,300 --> 00:19:10,460
that you do, you don't get the ones that you don't skim off the top there.

366
00:19:10,460 --> 00:19:13,040
Sometimes I do if I think they're interesting enough.

367
00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:14,520
I got to dig deep.

368
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:15,520
Yeah.

369
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:16,920
Yeah, he's got to get dig deep.

370
00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:18,440
And you do that way.

371
00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:20,000
You don't reflect what I'm doing.

372
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,000
I mean, it's perfect.

373
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,880
I tell you what, it's a perfect combination to me what we got going on now.

374
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:25,880
You have your stuff.

375
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:27,320
I have my stuff.

376
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:32,920
And we each have a slightly different point of view that I think jives very well on this

377
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:33,920
podcast.

378
00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:38,660
So I have some more first third, but I don't know.

379
00:19:38,660 --> 00:19:41,400
You know what, Rob, why don't you go into something?

380
00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:45,440
And then later on, if I need some material, I got like four pages of the first third because

381
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:47,360
I kind of went nuts on it this week.

382
00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:48,360
You're fine.

383
00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:49,360
All right.

384
00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:50,360
OK.

385
00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:52,880
Actually, I got a couple I'm going to go into.

386
00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:53,880
All right.

387
00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:54,880
Sounds good.

388
00:19:54,880 --> 00:20:02,720
First off, like I texted you Friday night.

389
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:06,040
I got me TV tunes.

390
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:07,040
I know.

391
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,040
I'm good.

392
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,960
Yeah, dude, it's awesome.

393
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:18,400
Mr. Magoo, other than all the good shows that air very late at night, like midnight.

394
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,400
Mr. Magoo got me when you sent me out.

395
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:21,920
I'm watching Mr. Magoo right now.

396
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:22,920
I'm like, fuck.

397
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:33,600
Well, no, I didn't watch a lot of they they were showing a lot of the.

398
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:38,520
Bug Bunny, but it's older ones.

399
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:41,520
And I'm telling you, there was some.

400
00:20:41,520 --> 00:20:44,960
From the nineteen nineteen forty, nineteen fifty.

401
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:46,960
I'm like, are you kidding me?

402
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:48,600
When Bugs Bunny looked completely different.

403
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:54,120
It came out when we were kids, you know, the art looked completely different on Bugs Bunny.

404
00:20:54,120 --> 00:20:55,120
I know what you're talking about.

405
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:58,960
Yeah, it's kind of like Woody Woodpecker.

406
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,160
I know Woody Woodpecker later on.

407
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:04,720
I've yet to see that because I can't stay up that late.

408
00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:10,040
OK, the old Woody Woodpecker, he has like his crown goes back.

409
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:11,640
It doesn't curl over in front.

410
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:12,640
He's got big legs.

411
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:15,440
He's kind of ugly.

412
00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:19,640
The second one, he's a cute little guy that's kind of kind of mean.

413
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:27,200
Anyhow, yeah, but the the old Bugs Bunny was kind of dark, wasn't it?

414
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:29,800
Yeah, yeah, it was.

415
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:35,480
Yeah, it was kind of dark in humor and the way it's illustrated, the the drawings.

416
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,600
It was kind of dark on that, too.

417
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:41,720
And they delved into some stuff that was always I mean, not all of it, but they had some dark

418
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,720
subjects, didn't they?

419
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:51,120
Well, I also watched a documentary today on that channel on TV.

420
00:21:51,120 --> 00:21:52,120
Oh, OK.

421
00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:54,120
And it was about old Bugs Bunny.

422
00:21:54,120 --> 00:21:57,120
And, you know, it was pretty cool.

423
00:21:57,120 --> 00:21:59,120
It was very informative.

424
00:21:59,120 --> 00:22:00,400
It really was.

425
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:01,400
That is cool.

426
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:04,200
I love documentaries like that.

427
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:09,640
Yeah, right now, the docu.

428
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,280
Oh series, I guess.

429
00:22:12,280 --> 00:22:14,280
The Food That Built America.

430
00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:16,120
I am just in love with.

431
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,280
Oh, I just love that.

432
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:24,200
Yeah, it is so cool because I mean, they go into like how craft was invented and and Post

433
00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:30,360
and Kellogg's was the same company and its two brothers that got into a fight and, you

434
00:22:30,360 --> 00:22:37,600
know, and like our competitors now, you know, Coca-Cola, Pepsi, all these Frito Lay, all

435
00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:39,480
these famous brands.

436
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:42,360
And they tell you about how they came about and the interesting stuff.

437
00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:44,540
Some of them came about during World War Two.

438
00:22:44,540 --> 00:22:46,540
Some of them came from fights.

439
00:22:46,540 --> 00:22:48,300
You know, it's really interesting.

440
00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:51,000
So anyhow, Rob, you're going somewhere this I'm sorry.

441
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:56,200
Oh, no, I was just saying I went ahead and I rented.

442
00:22:56,200 --> 00:23:07,360
I got I found on friendly TV that you could subscribe to for seven ninety nine a month

443
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:10,280
for a week three.

444
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:14,920
And that's what I've been watching on TV to friendly TV.

445
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:15,920
Oh, cool.

446
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:18,920
I'm getting back to my roots watching cartoons.

447
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:19,920
I love it.

448
00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:21,480
Cool.

449
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:22,880
I think that's awesome, man.

450
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:23,880
What a good service.

451
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:27,160
And they got a lot of different ones.

452
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:34,160
I mean, you know, they showed the Jetson's Blinkstone speed racer.

453
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,000
Oh, you name it.

454
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:38,440
They show it.

455
00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:41,480
Speed racer still at a gadget at the right time.

456
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:42,480
Yeah.

457
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:43,480
A speed racer.

458
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:45,080
Always funny going back and watch it.

459
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:46,280
I still love it.

460
00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:50,560
But all the they had to do because the differences in the languages.

461
00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:55,120
Ah, Trixie, I think I'm going to go.

462
00:23:55,120 --> 00:23:58,240
Yeah, it's still great.

463
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:01,720
Anyhow, racer X was his dead brother, right?

464
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:02,720
When that it.

465
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:03,720
Yeah, something like that.

466
00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:04,720
Yeah, something like that.

467
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:05,720
Anyhow.

468
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:06,720
Anyhow, go ahead, Rob.

469
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:07,720
OK, next up, I got another story.

470
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:21,440
There are necessities to our in travel and now it's partnering with the Norwegian Cruise

471
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:29,880
Line to hold an 11 day new dextrusion early next year.

472
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:30,880
Hmm.

473
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:31,880
Do tell, Rob.

474
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:32,880
Do tell.

475
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:33,880
This sounds interesting.

476
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:39,160
The passing was for the cruise will be easy.

477
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:44,360
A few casual outfits and a lot of sunscreen.

478
00:24:44,360 --> 00:24:51,760
OK, 11 day trip is being called the 2025 big new boat.

479
00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:55,480
In feels Norwegian boat.

480
00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:56,480
On the Pearl.

481
00:24:56,480 --> 00:25:02,920
OK, I've been on that boat.

482
00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:05,600
It's not the biggest.

483
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:11,640
But it's a real easy party boat because they have a lot of bars on the aft and on the forward

484
00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:14,360
where people sit, you know, where a lot of people go to.

485
00:25:14,360 --> 00:25:17,660
They want to see the ocean either going forward or backward.

486
00:25:17,660 --> 00:25:20,600
They have a lot of bars on every level there.

487
00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:22,160
And so it's kind of like a party boat.

488
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:23,160
So I could see that.

489
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:26,160
Anyhow, go ahead.

490
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:34,760
You there, Rob?

491
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:35,760
Yeah, I'm here.

492
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:36,760
OK, all right.

493
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,760
I have a little bit.

494
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:54,400
The 11 day trip is being called the 2025 big new boat on CLL Norwegian Pearl.

495
00:25:54,400 --> 00:26:00,720
It will depart Miami on February 3rd, 2025.

496
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:06,000
Stop include Great Sturrup, a.

497
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,000
Mm hmm.

498
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:11,840
Then one for Rico.

499
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,560
Do they have to put on clothes when they go to Puerto Rico?

500
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:17,880
Great Sturrup is Norwegians private island.

501
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:19,760
Listen, listen.

502
00:26:19,760 --> 00:26:24,600
And Castree St. Lucia.

503
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:29,680
This will go on sale in August.

504
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:30,680
OK.

505
00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:40,920
We'll be sailing aboard the lovely Norwegian Pearl, a twenty three hundred passenger ship

506
00:26:40,920 --> 00:26:48,520
with loads of entertainment, lots of open deck space and multiple dining options.

507
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:49,920
OK.

508
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:59,040
Especially restaurants and a large buffet area for food, outdoor dining will easily

509
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:03,600
accommodate a wide variety of culinary tastes.

510
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:04,600
OK.

511
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:11,520
OK, so I read this one, but I read another article too about it.

512
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:12,520
OK.

513
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:17,960
There will be times you have to have clothes on.

514
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:18,960
OK.

515
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:22,880
Yeah, that's not thought because Great Sturrup, OK, they can get away with it because that's

516
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:29,320
Norwegians private island and they own that island so they can say everybody's nude.

517
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:32,800
Now well, there's more to it.

518
00:27:32,800 --> 00:27:33,800
Oh, OK.

519
00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:34,800
Go ahead, please.

520
00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:35,800
I'm going to go.

521
00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:38,800
I'm just what I read off another story.

522
00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:41,800
I might go into that.

523
00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:42,800
OK.

524
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:43,800
OK.

525
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:49,800
If you think that.

526
00:27:49,800 --> 00:28:00,200
That is a thing.

527
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:03,320
Uh huh.

528
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,320
What do you call it?

529
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:07,320
What?

530
00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:10,320
Where you trade partners.

531
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:14,480
Oh, swingers.

532
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:15,480
I don't have.

533
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:16,480
Yeah, swingers.

534
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:17,480
OK.

535
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:23,560
Swingers are pretty much not welcome.

536
00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:25,240
OK, that's good.

537
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:27,280
Well I mean, at least to me, unless you're into that.

538
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:30,280
This is for naturalists.

539
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:31,280
OK.

540
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:34,280
It's what they call it.

541
00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:35,280
Naturalists.

542
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:36,280
OK.

543
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,280
And others do this.

544
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:40,280
Uh huh.

545
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:41,280
It's not for.

546
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:42,280
Yeah.

547
00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:43,280
Yeah.

548
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:50,280
Actually, I got a story I'm going to go into tomorrow night about cruises.

549
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:51,280
Uh huh.

550
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:54,280
And being single.

551
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:55,280
OK.

552
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:58,280
But that's tomorrow night.

553
00:28:58,280 --> 00:28:59,280
OK.

554
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:02,280
No, this is just for Buddhists.

555
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:03,280
OK.

556
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:08,280
And you have to have clothes on when you go to your meals.

557
00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:09,280
Stuff like that.

558
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:10,280
Yeah.

559
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:11,280
You know.

560
00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:12,280
That makes sense.

561
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:13,280
That makes a lot of sense.

562
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:14,280
Hygienically.

563
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:21,080
And also, do you want to see, you know, people saggy tits, fucking old balls while you're

564
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:22,280
eating your steak?

565
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:23,280
No.

566
00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:24,280
OK, that's cool.

567
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:25,280
Yeah, no, no.

568
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:29,280
Not while I'm eating, but any other time, why not?

569
00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:35,240
Now, that's a good idea about the no-swingers because that would be a predatory thing that

570
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:38,080
they could get in on everybody naked.

571
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:39,080
Right.

572
00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:40,080
Because they're already...

573
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:45,080
Well, and that's where my story goes in tomorrow night.

574
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:46,080
OK.

575
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:47,080
Yeah, because they're already...

576
00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:50,080
Yeah, there's other things I can add to it.

577
00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:51,080
There's...

578
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:54,080
Yeah, they don't like swingers on cruises.

579
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:57,080
No, and that's because they lurk.

580
00:29:57,080 --> 00:30:03,920
You go around the bars and they wait and they come up and they act really sweet and nice

581
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:07,840
and don't act like anything's up and they try to get you drunk and try to get you into

582
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:10,280
things that they want you to do.

583
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:14,400
And everybody has had it happen to them and it's annoying as hell.

584
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,400
And it gets to where you're paranoid.

585
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,600
If a couple comes up and just starts talking, you don't want to talk to them because you

586
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:23,120
don't know if they're fucking hitting on you or trying to get something or...

587
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:24,120
Right, right, right.

588
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:25,120
Yeah.

589
00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:28,120
You know, you're trying to get back to your cabin.

590
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:31,480
Yeah, and you know, and they're hot breath and you...

591
00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:34,600
No, and you've got two people want you to join in.

592
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:35,600
No.

593
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:36,600
No.

594
00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:37,600
Look, and...

595
00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:39,600
I just want to go home and go to bed.

596
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:41,240
Yeah, and they can do whatever they want.

597
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:42,240
It doesn't bother me.

598
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:45,080
But whenever they come out there and we can't go to a bar freely...

599
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,160
It's not in the hallways where everybody has to watch them.

600
00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:49,160
Yeah.

601
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:51,800
If nothing else, then they ought to have a place on the ship where they can all meet

602
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:52,800
up.

603
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:54,920
That way they know who all is in it and not.

604
00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:55,920
I mean...

605
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:58,440
That kind of leads into my story tomorrow.

606
00:30:58,440 --> 00:30:59,440
Okay.

607
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:02,120
They have like upside down pineapples, I think is what it is.

608
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:03,120
Upside down pineapples.

609
00:31:03,120 --> 00:31:07,520
And if you ever want to play a mean trick on somebody, get a big upside down pineapple

610
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:13,040
poster and put it on somebody's door that you want to fuck with.

611
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,240
Because they'll probably get knocks all night.

612
00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:16,240
Hey!

613
00:31:16,240 --> 00:31:17,240
Hey!

614
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:18,240
Is this it?

615
00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:19,240
You know.

616
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:21,560
So, anyhow, we're really late for a first break.

617
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:25,000
When we come back, do you want to go into the hairy asshole Olympics, Rob?

618
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:26,600
That's good.

619
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,080
All righty.

620
00:31:28,080 --> 00:31:30,080
We'll be right back in a couple minutes.

621
00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:32,080
I think I'm ready to battle.

622
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:35,360
No, I'm not sure.

623
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:37,440
You got some killers, dude.

624
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:38,440
I know.

625
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:39,440
I really brought it.

626
00:31:39,440 --> 00:31:40,440
You know what?

627
00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:43,320
I really, really, really took a long time.

628
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,600
I scratched off so many names, Rob.

629
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,880
I was just like, man, this one is going to be epic.

630
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:50,880
So I don't know what I'm going to do with the next batch.

631
00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:55,760
No, you have nine and I have five.

632
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:58,960
Two of mine are women.

633
00:31:58,960 --> 00:31:59,960
Okay.

634
00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:00,960
All right.

635
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:01,960
That's all right.

636
00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:02,960
That's all right.

637
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:03,960
That's all right.

638
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:04,960
That's what the wild card's for.

639
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:05,960
I got something for you tonight.

640
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:06,960
All right.

641
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:07,960
We'll be right back in a couple minutes.

642
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:08,960
Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser.

643
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:09,960
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cucumber.

644
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:36,120
Tomorrow morning while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte, remember

645
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:43,120
to not get your genitals caught in the grinder.

646
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:44,120
It really hurts.

647
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:45,120
Who can afford plastic surgery?

648
00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:46,120
Stay safe, everyone.

649
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:47,120
Hey, look.

650
00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:48,120
I think we found land.

651
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:49,120
Oh my God.

652
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:50,120
I think we're safe.

653
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:51,120
Oh no.

654
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:54,120
It's the island of horrible jokes.

655
00:32:54,120 --> 00:33:04,120
What do you call a factory that just makes okay products?

656
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:07,120
A satis-factory.

657
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:12,120
The apocalypse just happened.

658
00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:17,120
You don't know what to do.

659
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:20,120
You don't know where to go.

660
00:33:20,120 --> 00:33:21,120
But we can tell you what you can eat.

661
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:24,120
During an apocalypse, you will probably need a good insecticide.

662
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:29,200
Soybean, corn, and peppermint oil are some plant extracts that create powerful natural

663
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:30,200
insecticides.

664
00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:34,920
They are some of nature's best organic and natural pesticides that when combined can

665
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:40,480
make a far more superior weapon that growers can effectively use to improve their integrated

666
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:50,600
pest management on their crops or on their person.

667
00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:54,280
Next up, things overheard in hell.

668
00:33:54,280 --> 00:34:00,560
Right, right, cola is the only soft drink available in hell.

669
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:02,880
Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark.

670
00:34:02,880 --> 00:34:08,600
I should have never taught that damn dog how to read.

671
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:11,800
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper.

672
00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:14,800
It's strange insults from an alien.

673
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:15,800
Real hilarity.

674
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:28,240
You are dressed like an assistant debate coach at an Ohio State Middle School.

675
00:34:28,240 --> 00:34:35,440
Your mama's so fat, she went out in high heels and struck oil.

676
00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:48,400
Hi everybody, Mark here from Two Douchebags and Microphone, and I'm here with, there we

677
00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:49,400
go.

678
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:55,840
Alright, like promised, shall we get right into the hairy asshole Olympics, Rob?

679
00:34:55,840 --> 00:35:00,000
Yeah, this is going to be challenging.

680
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:01,000
Alright.

681
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:04,000
It's going to be challenging.

682
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:08,680
I have five to nine.

683
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:09,680
Okay, alright.

684
00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:12,680
I have five, you have nine.

685
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:18,360
Alrighty, I'm going to trust the fights to you.

686
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:20,560
You line them all up against each other.

687
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:24,560
Oh shit, I don't know how I want to do it.

688
00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:28,840
Okay, alright, hang on, let me find, damn it, I don't know what I did with my names.

689
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:34,320
I may have put two of mine together because I have the one too female.

690
00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:38,600
Yeah, you know what, start off with them.

691
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:39,600
I'm looking for my list.

692
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:40,600
Let's start off with them.

693
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:41,600
Okay.

694
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:53,120
We have Mila Kunis versus Yoko Ono.

695
00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:56,720
Okay, there's two, to me there's two schools of thought.

696
00:35:56,720 --> 00:36:03,320
Yoko Ono is probably 80, so she might be losing hair down there, although she probably collected

697
00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:06,520
hair for years.

698
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:13,560
Mila Kunis is younger and doesn't, you know, just barely washes herself.

699
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:17,200
She's not giving her kids baths on a regular basis.

700
00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:18,200
Yeah.

701
00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:20,600
Yes, and isn't she like Lithuanian or something?

702
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:26,880
No, she's Ukrainian.

703
00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:28,960
Ukrainian, okay.

704
00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:35,160
Okay, I'm going with Mila.

705
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:38,400
Actually?

706
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:41,320
Yes?

707
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:47,520
I think I gotta go with her too.

708
00:36:47,520 --> 00:36:49,520
Mila Kunis it is.

709
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:51,960
The judge hits his gravel.

710
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:55,560
Yes, you know, he commands all kinds of hair.

711
00:36:55,560 --> 00:37:02,520
You know, he's like, yeah, yeah.

712
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:04,680
So yeah, I'm going with Mila.

713
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:10,920
And I just for the sheer fact that Yoko is probably 80 or more and her hair is probably

714
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:12,280
falling out.

715
00:37:12,280 --> 00:37:15,960
And if nothing else, it's like really gray and you can't see it very well.

716
00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:19,480
So I'm going Mila.

717
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:20,880
All right, Mila it is.

718
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:21,880
All right, next.

719
00:37:21,880 --> 00:37:29,080
While we're at it, let's stay in that 70's show.

720
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:30,080
Okay.

721
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:36,880
Let's go Danny Masterson versus Robert Torjilo.

722
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:43,600
This is going to be a tough one because you got a musician that does not give a shit.

723
00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:49,520
You know, he likes being hairy and probably likes to freak out groupies with all that

724
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:50,520
hair too.

725
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:52,760
You know, he's probably like, yeah, you want it.

726
00:37:52,760 --> 00:37:53,760
You got to get to it.

727
00:37:53,760 --> 00:37:54,760
There it is in the jungle.

728
00:37:54,760 --> 00:37:59,760
He is an actor in prison for molesting people.

729
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:00,760
Yes.

730
00:38:00,760 --> 00:38:08,200
I'd be growing it out as a shield if it was me.

731
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:09,200
Me too.

732
00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:11,720
All right, then let's go with Danny.

733
00:38:11,720 --> 00:38:13,840
Okay, Danny.

734
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:14,840
Yeah.

735
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:15,840
Wow.

736
00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:16,840
All right.

737
00:38:16,840 --> 00:38:17,840
Because you're right.

738
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:21,400
He would have to grow it out as a shield to protect his bunghole.

739
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,400
Yeah.

740
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:23,400
Yep.

741
00:38:23,400 --> 00:38:24,400
Okay.

742
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:25,400
I'm good with that.

743
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:27,960
I can understand protecting one's asshole.

744
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:30,320
So all right.

745
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:32,320
Next one.

746
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:38,960
Okay, let's go.

747
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:47,720
I've read Fox versus you're Jerry Garcia.

748
00:38:47,720 --> 00:38:54,760
I think Jerry Garcia because he is just he was so hairy and he didn't give a shit.

749
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:55,760
He didn't.

750
00:38:55,760 --> 00:38:56,760
I'm an emergency.

751
00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:57,760
I'm an emergency.

752
00:38:57,760 --> 00:38:58,760
Yep.

753
00:38:58,760 --> 00:38:59,760
Yep.

754
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:00,760
Jerry Garcia all the way.

755
00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:09,560
And I'm not going to bring out Red Fox.

756
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:10,560
Yeah.

757
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:11,560
Okay.

758
00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:15,920
One thing that we can only give him and I ain't going to bring up.

759
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:16,920
Okay.

760
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:17,920
All right.

761
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:22,920
Then we'll just we'll go with Jerry Garcia.

762
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:23,920
All right.

763
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:26,920
Next one, please.

764
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:31,920
All right.

765
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:35,920
Well, my true last one.

766
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:37,640
Uh huh.

767
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:40,200
George Clint.

768
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:41,200
And the P fuck.

769
00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:42,200
Okay.

770
00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:43,360
Yes.

771
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:44,360
George Clinton.

772
00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:51,200
I'm going to put against your Jason Momoa.

773
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:56,440
I think the years wins.

774
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:59,280
George George Clinton.

775
00:39:59,280 --> 00:40:04,320
He's a known he's a known stinker.

776
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:10,560
People around him says he has a fur the worst funk smell because he that's just what he

777
00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:11,560
is.

778
00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:15,840
He's just like a you know, Rastafarian doesn't care.

779
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:21,760
You know, he's like grows all this stuff out and you know, let's just flow in the wind.

780
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:25,640
So yes, George Clinton would win that.

781
00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:26,640
Next one.

782
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:27,640
Okay.

783
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:31,600
I'm going to throw a couple of years together.

784
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:32,600
Okay.

785
00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:38,280
The time out other than pulling my stage of my wild card.

786
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:39,280
Okay.

787
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:46,120
Let's go your Hank Williams Jr.

788
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:49,120
All right.

789
00:40:49,120 --> 00:41:01,000
This is your Claudio St. Chas.

790
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:02,000
What do you think?

791
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:03,000
I look him up.

792
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:04,000
I look him up.

793
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:07,000
Uh huh.

794
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,080
I think I gotta give it to Hank.

795
00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:12,080
I gotta give it to Hank also.

796
00:41:12,080 --> 00:41:13,080
Southern boy.

797
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:14,880
Yeah, he don't play.

798
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:15,880
Just by default.

799
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:16,880
Yes, Hank.

800
00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:17,880
Hank gets a.

801
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:19,480
Yeah, yeah.

802
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:20,480
Alcohol.

803
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:21,480
Yeah, yeah.

804
00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:24,760
All his rowdy friends would never try to shave him.

805
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:27,760
Yeah, there you go.

806
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:29,760
All right.

807
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:31,400
All righty.

808
00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:34,440
Next one on the docket.

809
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:36,440
Okay.

810
00:41:36,440 --> 00:41:39,840
Next one.

811
00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:43,160
Let's go.

812
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:48,160
Del Castro.

813
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:53,240
Versus your terrorists.

814
00:41:53,240 --> 00:42:00,120
I called him Nola Omar.

815
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:04,120
The dude that bombed.

816
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:10,160
Yeah, the dude that blew the planes into the.

817
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:11,160
Yeah.

818
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:12,160
Yeah.

819
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:21,240
I'm gonna go with Castro.

820
00:42:21,240 --> 00:42:31,400
I would have to go to Castro too, because after the old boy flew the plane into the.

821
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:32,400
Tower.

822
00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:33,400
Uh huh.

823
00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:36,960
His hair was pinched.

824
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:39,560
That's another great reason, Rob.

825
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:42,680
That alone makes Castro the winner.

826
00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:44,800
All right.

827
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:45,800
Sounds cool.

828
00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:48,800
Yeah, I'd add to it.

829
00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:50,800
All right.

830
00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:53,520
Oh, shit.

831
00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:54,520
Yes.

832
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:59,840
Now you have two left.

833
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:01,720
I have none.

834
00:43:01,720 --> 00:43:03,360
Just put them against each other.

835
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:06,920
No, I'm not gonna do that.

836
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,560
Oh, you're gonna pull out your wild card, aren't you?

837
00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:14,800
Well, first I'm gonna pull out safe.

838
00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:15,800
Oh, okay.

839
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:16,800
Good.

840
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:17,800
Good.

841
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:27,520
I'm gonna say bullwinkle and put him against me and Joe Green.

842
00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:30,880
Okay.

843
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:33,880
Got any thoughts on this?

844
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:42,240
Well, I know who I want me and Joe Green to eventually go with, but I don't know if bullwinkle

845
00:43:42,240 --> 00:43:43,240
might pull it for that.

846
00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:44,240
I don't know.

847
00:43:44,240 --> 00:43:47,240
I'm gonna go with me and Joe Green.

848
00:43:47,240 --> 00:43:55,000
Actually, I think I'm gonna have to go there too.

849
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:56,000
All right.

850
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,000
Me and Joe, it is.

851
00:43:57,000 --> 00:43:58,000
All right.

852
00:43:58,000 --> 00:43:59,000
All right.

853
00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:01,000
For my wild card, you'll understand.

854
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:05,680
Well, that's one of the reasons I decided to go with me and Joe is because I want to

855
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:08,680
see this matchup.

856
00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:13,080
Okay.

857
00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:15,080
You have one left.

858
00:44:15,080 --> 00:44:16,080
Okay.

859
00:44:16,080 --> 00:44:17,080
Wolfman Jack.

860
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:18,080
Uh-huh.

861
00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:21,080
I'm pulling my wild card now.

862
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:22,080
Okay.

863
00:44:22,080 --> 00:44:26,600
I'm calling in two in one night.

864
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:29,600
I love this.

865
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:40,200
I'm bringing in Lyle Alzado.

866
00:44:40,200 --> 00:44:43,720
Lyle Alzado, football player, right?

867
00:44:43,720 --> 00:44:45,720
Let me.

868
00:44:45,720 --> 00:44:48,000
Football player.

869
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:55,600
And when Roland Derby come on, come back in, he was actually captain of the team.

870
00:44:55,600 --> 00:44:58,600
I used to watch him.

871
00:44:58,600 --> 00:44:59,600
Okay.

872
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:03,720
Oh, he is a hairy guy.

873
00:45:03,720 --> 00:45:06,480
Oh, dude.

874
00:45:06,480 --> 00:45:08,760
I think we're gonna have to go with Lyle Alzado.

875
00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:09,760
Yes.

876
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:14,600
I hate for Lyle to be a Wolfman Jack.

877
00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:19,000
Wolfman Jack was one of my friend's joys, but I think Lyle, yeah.

878
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:20,000
Yeah.

879
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:22,200
Lyle has got this.

880
00:45:22,200 --> 00:45:23,200
Gotta go with him.

881
00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:26,200
He don't care.

882
00:45:26,200 --> 00:45:31,920
Besides that, Lyle Alzado would kick the shit out of Wolfman Jack just to win.

883
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:36,600
Football, Roland Derby, yeah.

884
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:37,600
Yeah.

885
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:38,600
Yep.

886
00:45:38,600 --> 00:45:39,600
Yep.

887
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:40,600
Roland Derby.

888
00:45:40,600 --> 00:45:43,160
Just get, just Roland Derby alone gets it for me.

889
00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:46,720
But okay, Lyle Alzado wins that.

890
00:45:46,720 --> 00:45:49,400
He wins it in stunning fashion.

891
00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:54,480
He got the knockout in like four seconds.

892
00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:56,480
So.

893
00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:59,480
Somehow we ended up four to four.

894
00:45:59,480 --> 00:46:01,480
See, I knew it would take care of itself.

895
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:02,480
All right.

896
00:46:02,480 --> 00:46:03,480
Yep.

897
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:04,480
Cool.

898
00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:09,600
I knew you had saves and wild cards and all that, so I knew it was gonna, it would equal

899
00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:10,600
it.

900
00:46:10,600 --> 00:46:13,480
I had to pull in tonight, and you were far ahead of me.

901
00:46:13,480 --> 00:46:15,480
I had to pull a couple of tonight.

902
00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:16,480
Cool.

903
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:17,480
Now we're evenly matched up.

904
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:20,200
I got me, but I got Lyle.

905
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:21,200
See I like this.

906
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:25,680
We're evenly matched up for this next round, which is gonna be starting to get to the gritty.

907
00:46:25,680 --> 00:46:29,160
We're gonna have some like painful ones and we're gonna have some we're probably gonna

908
00:46:29,160 --> 00:46:31,160
have to turn over to Topher.

909
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:32,160
So.

910
00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:33,160
Oh shit.

911
00:46:33,160 --> 00:46:34,160
Yeah.

912
00:46:34,160 --> 00:46:35,160
Yep.

913
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:37,800
The next round is not gonna be easy.

914
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:38,800
We're gonna.

915
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:44,200
There's one I want for the finale, so I may have to mix them up next time.

916
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:45,200
Okay.

917
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:46,200
All righty.

918
00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:49,200
I have a finale I'm thinking of.

919
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:50,680
Oh, I've got some.

920
00:46:50,680 --> 00:46:52,320
I think you are too.

921
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:53,600
I've got some names.

922
00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:54,600
Trust me.

923
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:57,760
After tonight, I think you figured out my finale.

924
00:46:57,760 --> 00:46:58,760
Yeah, maybe so.

925
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:01,280
We'll see if it works out.

926
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:02,280
Okay.

927
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:03,280
All right.

928
00:47:03,280 --> 00:47:04,280
Let's take our second break.

929
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:05,800
We're gonna come back with.

930
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:08,520
I've got a subject that I want me and you to touch on.

931
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:13,440
I've been wanting to talk about it ever since I heard about it about a week and a half ago.

932
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:14,440
So.

933
00:47:14,440 --> 00:47:15,440
All right.

934
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:16,440
I think it's gonna be great.

935
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:17,440
Anyhow, we'll be right back.

936
00:47:17,440 --> 00:47:26,840
Hey there, fuck stick.

937
00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:30,920
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.

938
00:47:30,920 --> 00:47:35,920
A man in Manitoba, Canada collects rat traps.

939
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:42,640
He now has three thousand four hundred and twenty one.

940
00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:47,000
Two dish bags, a microphone and an effort to keep everything fresh.

941
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:52,360
We offer you first world problems.

942
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,360
To help bridge construction.

943
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:58,640
I cannot believe I have to repair this bridge after 50 years.

944
00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:01,640
And what am I going to do?

945
00:48:01,640 --> 00:48:04,600
I can't like that 10 minutes earlier just to get to work.

946
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:05,600
This is complete bullshit.

947
00:48:05,600 --> 00:48:06,600
I'm gonna write my congressman.

948
00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:07,600
Please remember to go to Cole's dressing room.

949
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:08,600
Wait five minutes and scream.

950
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:09,600
Hey, there's no toilet paper in here.

951
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:16,600
Have you ever wondered where something came from?

952
00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:27,120
Have you ever looked at something and said, I wonder what the origin of that is?

953
00:48:27,120 --> 00:48:28,120
Well so have we.

954
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:32,440
That's why we give you the origin of.

955
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:35,720
The origin of the hamburger bun.

956
00:48:35,720 --> 00:48:40,920
The family of Oscar Willerby claims the first known hamburger on a bun was served on July

957
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:44,800
4th 1891 on Grandpa Oscar's farm.

958
00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:47,800
The bun was reportedly a yeast bun.

959
00:48:47,800 --> 00:48:50,800
A brand new feature.

960
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:55,080
Strange consults from an alien.

961
00:48:55,080 --> 00:49:02,540
May you always step in a wet spot after putting on fresh socks.

962
00:49:02,540 --> 00:49:09,540
You emotionally disturbed dirtbags in a popsicle will be right back.

963
00:49:33,040 --> 00:49:42,520
You have the personality of a soggy newspaper.

964
00:49:42,520 --> 00:50:00,240
Now from this underground bunker camped in Missouri stocked with dried goods canned food

965
00:50:00,240 --> 00:50:08,080
vibrating toys is ramblings of a madman featuring rob rad when everything is coming your way

966
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:12,080
you're in the wrong one

967
00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:22,240
uh

968
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:32,960
microphone i'm mark and i'm rob okay rob we've both been big nfl enthusiasts for quite a while right

969
00:50:32,960 --> 00:50:44,560
oh definitely yeah well okay the nfl has recently hinted at an 18 game regular season i'm not sure

970
00:50:44,560 --> 00:50:52,000
about this i mean you know they already have virtually every tv live service and streaming

971
00:50:52,000 --> 00:51:00,560
service uh wrapped up they already have contracts with them all and you know are to me the 18 games

972
00:51:00,560 --> 00:51:05,040
they're going to take another pre-season game away is what they want to do and they want to go to an

973
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:12,160
18 game season so the difference between pre-season and a regular game is this right here this one

974
00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:19,440
counts so all the um top shelf players are going to be playing but here's the deal one more game

975
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:27,520
is going to make things to me i mean uh extended by one game a couple years ago i think did take

976
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:35,280
some of the uh quality if you ask me because of the injuries away from matchups and i think 18

977
00:51:35,280 --> 00:51:43,040
games might just be too much um to where i mean the game is too brutal to have to me to have an

978
00:51:43,040 --> 00:51:48,640
18 game season i love the thought of having another game that counts i love the thought of a more of

979
00:51:48,640 --> 00:51:55,040
a season but i just don't know if that is right for the nfl you're putting your biggest stars at

980
00:51:55,040 --> 00:52:02,640
jeopardy putting them on the field another week and having two weeks less to get yourself in shape

981
00:52:02,640 --> 00:52:07,680
and also it's going to be harder to evaluate personnel because you only have two weeks to do

982
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:12,160
it in and then training camp so rob what do you think on this

983
00:52:12,160 --> 00:52:22,880
is uh i really don't know man i really don't know well i'm kind of conflicted

984
00:52:25,040 --> 00:52:30,800
i think so too but the thing is is i would love to see more competition and more matchups and

985
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:37,360
you know that too but not if it's going to be you got to give your players time to get ready

986
00:52:37,360 --> 00:52:43,520
yeah i just uh i don't know how good of an idea it is to have 18 regular season games

987
00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:49,520
and only two pre-season games and also you're putting your players in jeopardy your top players

988
00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:54,960
especially your quarterbacks and your star receivers being injured for the playoffs by

989
00:52:54,960 --> 00:53:01,600
having such a long season so let's say that we you know you play all season okay you get the best

990
00:53:01,600 --> 00:53:07,760
record you can and then you play that extra game that extra game might be coming down to you know

991
00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:13,840
who gets the better seating so mahomes has to be in there so he's trying to win the game and suddenly

992
00:53:13,840 --> 00:53:19,280
he gets a bad injury because he played that extra game he's a little bit worn down and someone hits

993
00:53:19,280 --> 00:53:24,000
him just wrong he blows his knee out what you know or something his shoulder something like that

994
00:53:24,000 --> 00:53:29,920
then your playoffs are ruined because you have that extra game so i don't know if i'm for it or

995
00:53:29,920 --> 00:53:36,480
not normally i would like more competitive games with top players but i don't know for the safety

996
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:45,360
of the top players if it's feasible so i don't know all right i i mean i don't think it's going

997
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:49,760
to matter i mean they're not going to listen to us anyhow however we go about it you know whether

998
00:53:49,760 --> 00:53:55,120
we're for it or against it doesn't matter they're going to do what they're going to do so anyhow i

999
00:53:55,120 --> 00:54:00,240
guess if you had to come over and you put a gun in my head i would be against it

1000
00:54:04,880 --> 00:54:12,400
Rob? Yeah? You think so too? Okay all right well that was my question you got something Rob?

1001
00:54:14,800 --> 00:54:17,920
Yeah i do i'm going to McDonald's. Okay.

1002
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:31,200
Okay. According to McDonald's Lopez Foods has been the company's main beef supplier for over three

1003
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:43,200
decades. Okay. Based in Oklahoma City this company describes itself as a protein processing specialist

1004
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:53,360
on its website. It's just another way of saying they handle all kinds of meat products. Besides

1005
00:54:53,360 --> 00:55:01,360
supplying McDonald's with fresh and frozen ground beef they also supply pork and poultry products

1006
00:55:02,400 --> 00:55:10,000
just not from McDonald's. The fast food giants pork and poultry are handled by different companies.

1007
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:21,280
All the beef provided is USDA expected and the company regularly undergoes third party audits

1008
00:55:22,240 --> 00:55:31,360
from organizations like the USDA round table for sustainable beef. So if you're worried about animal

1009
00:55:31,360 --> 00:55:41,680
welfare then it does seem like McDonald's and their suppliers aren't turning corners there. Lopez Foods

1010
00:55:42,640 --> 00:55:53,520
or Lopez Dorada Foods to use its full name is also part of the global foods safety initiative.

1011
00:55:53,520 --> 00:56:00,880
So the beef is checked to see if it's fit to consumption before it becomes a delicious

1012
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:11,840
McDonald's burger. Okay. So I guess their shit is actually being checked out not bad.

1013
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:17,520
Okay. Now I don't know but that's my opinion.

1014
00:56:17,520 --> 00:56:24,960
Okay. All right. Thank you Rob. Is there any more to that or is that it?

1015
00:56:26,480 --> 00:56:34,400
No they're saying that McDonald's beat baddies or actually beat baddies. Yeah. Made in Oklahoma City.

1016
00:56:34,400 --> 00:56:50,080
Okay. And it does go into the hoaxes and all that about the house can't you remember the pink slime

1017
00:56:51,680 --> 00:56:59,120
dilemma. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. To me. Okay. Here's something that I look at and I don't know if

1018
00:56:59,120 --> 00:57:06,960
there's something to it or not but there's different ways of wording stuff. Okay. So you get a burger.

1019
00:57:06,960 --> 00:57:13,520
I don't know. Let's say I don't know this or not. I'm just making this scenario up Wendy's or Sonic

1020
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:21,280
and you see 100% pure beef patty and then you might go to a McDonald's or a burger bitch

1021
00:57:21,280 --> 00:57:32,560
and see made with 100% pure beef. Made with means part of it is 100% pure beef but it's made with

1022
00:57:32,560 --> 00:57:39,280
something else. You see and I think that's where a lot of places get people. Oh this is made with 100%

1023
00:57:39,280 --> 00:57:44,720
pure beef. Well what percentage of it is made with 100% pure beef? Oh about a third of it.

1024
00:57:45,280 --> 00:57:50,800
So what are the other two thirds? You see what I'm saying? The way it's worded is very it's a lot

1025
00:57:50,800 --> 00:57:58,800
of trickery and I don't know how is that worded. I'm not saying McDonald's is or isn't. What I'd

1026
00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:05,440
like to know is how is it worded? See what I mean? Because they could buy beef from these people all

1027
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:15,600
day but if it's made with 100% pure beef and the rest is sawdust you would know because it tells you

1028
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:21,760
it's made with 100% pure beef. It's doing what it has to do and telling you it's made with

1029
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:30,080
but it doesn't say 100% pure beef patty inside this bun or whatever. So I don't know. Oh well

1030
00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:36,080
I mean you know what? I hope they are real beef 100%. I don't eat there enough to really have a

1031
00:58:36,080 --> 00:58:47,840
vested interest do you? Yeah. Yeah so all right is that it Rob? Yeah that was it I know. Okay I'm

1032
00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:52,320
going to go into Jordan Love. He just got a huge contract. Did you read about that?

1033
00:58:54,400 --> 00:59:02,960
Yeah. He's the highest paid player in the NFL. So coming off a spectacular 2023 campaign his debut

1034
00:59:02,960 --> 00:59:09,040
as the Pax starting quarterback Jordan Love is now tied for the title and NFL's highest paid player

1035
00:59:09,040 --> 00:59:17,840
ever. Agreeing Friday to a four-year 220 million dollar extension with his 155 million guaranteed.

1036
00:59:17,840 --> 00:59:25,280
A person with knowledge of the deal told Tom Silverstein, not man, of Packers News and the USA

1037
00:59:25,280 --> 00:59:30,160
Today Network the person spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to

1038
00:59:30,160 --> 00:59:37,600
disclose financial terms of the agreement. So okay last year was Mahomes worst year he barely had a

1039
00:59:37,600 --> 00:59:49,040
receiving corps right? I mean yeah by far it was a subpar season for Mahomes. Okay this is Jordan's

1040
00:59:49,040 --> 00:59:59,520
rookie year so I'm going to compare stats of last year. Jordan Love had 4159 yards. Patrick Mahomes

1041
00:59:59,520 --> 01:00:07,840
had and this is regular season not playoffs yards 4183. So Mahomes beat him by 20 some yards 30 yards

1042
01:00:07,840 --> 01:00:19,120
right okay on the regular season. Completions for Jordan Love was 372. Completions for Mahomes was

1043
01:00:19,120 --> 01:00:33,840
401. Attempts from Jordan Love attempted passes 579. Attempts for pass attempts for Mahomes is 597.

1044
01:00:35,680 --> 01:00:44,400
Their average pass Jordan Love was 7.2. This would be 7.2 yards. The average pass from Mahomes last

1045
01:00:44,400 --> 01:00:51,200
year was 7 yards instead of and you know so 0.2 yards virtually tied but anyhow touchdowns for

1046
01:00:51,200 --> 01:01:00,800
Jordan Love is 32. Touchdowns for Patrick Mahomes last year was 27. Interceptions for Jordan Love

1047
01:01:00,800 --> 01:01:09,680
was 11 last year and interceptions for Mahomes was 14. The quarterback rating and this is a rating

1048
01:01:09,680 --> 01:01:14,640
where they calculate all the stats in together right and they come up with a rating about how

1049
01:01:14,640 --> 01:01:23,200
effective they were. The rating for Jordan Love was 96.1 and the rating for Mahomes was 92.6.

1050
01:01:25,200 --> 01:01:34,800
Rushing for Love was 247 and rushing for Mahomes was 389 but Mahomes won the Super Bowl. Jordan

1051
01:01:34,800 --> 01:01:43,600
Love lost in the not even the championship game the divisional game. So what I'm saying is this

1052
01:01:43,600 --> 01:01:50,640
right here. Yeah he had great stats but is that elite stats? That was Mahomes's worst year ever

1053
01:01:50,640 --> 01:01:56,320
and kind of an embarrassment for him. Do you think that that guy deserved elite money or not?

1054
01:01:58,960 --> 01:02:04,480
I don't think he was worth that much but I think the Packers are committed to him and they

1055
01:02:04,480 --> 01:02:09,280
believe in him and they need to give him a big contract and they gave him that contract.

1056
01:02:09,280 --> 01:02:17,280
Now another thing is is I know you need to get all the money you can right but Mahomes isn't

1057
01:02:17,280 --> 01:02:23,680
freaking out because Jordan Love is making more money than him. You know he would rather win games.

1058
01:02:24,640 --> 01:02:29,280
Jordan Love taking that type of money does this mean in five years they're going to be in the same

1059
01:02:29,280 --> 01:02:35,680
situation they were with Aaron Rodgers where Aaron Rodgers is taking so much cap space that they had

1060
01:02:35,680 --> 01:02:41,040
to go through their drafting system to try to draft somebody and then they got their five years

1061
01:02:41,040 --> 01:02:45,520
and not paying him very much and getting everything he can out of him in five years and trying to win

1062
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:52,160
the Super Bowl with those guys because it didn't work too well before. I mean yeah they're in the

1063
01:02:52,160 --> 01:02:57,680
playoffs a lot but they never could get over the hump. Someone always beat them and they only made

1064
01:02:57,680 --> 01:03:06,160
it to the Super Bowl once or twice during Aaron Rodgers. They won one of them but anyhow

1065
01:03:08,560 --> 01:03:15,360
I'm kind of thinking like you know they got rid of Aaron Rodgers pretty much. Well Aaron Rodgers

1066
01:03:15,360 --> 01:03:19,840
got rid of himself let's be honest you know he started freaking out because they got Jordan Love

1067
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:25,680
and didn't tell him anything about it but I would think to me that if you're the Packers you'll be

1068
01:03:25,680 --> 01:03:32,640
very careful about overextending all your money like you did before. So what do you think Rob?

1069
01:03:35,040 --> 01:03:41,520
Yeah I agree I agree. I would not get the money out and watch it and see what happens.

1070
01:03:42,240 --> 01:03:46,800
Yeah I think you could have easily pushed him aside for a little bit and gave him a little bit

1071
01:03:46,800 --> 01:03:52,240
more change and said hang on hang on we're trying to see how far we can get this team made it to the

1072
01:03:52,240 --> 01:03:57,440
divisional round last year. We think with just a couple more players we might be able to make it

1073
01:03:57,440 --> 01:04:05,040
to the Super Bowl. Are you in Jordan or are you greedy? So I don't know how all this went down.

1074
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:09,600
They could have went to Jordan Love and said here's your money or Jordan Love could have said hey um

1075
01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:14,800
look at my stats I was slightly better than my homes last year give me my money.

1076
01:04:14,800 --> 01:04:22,640
So and um I'm going to go ahead and defer and uh don't make your judgment till this year and then

1077
01:04:22,640 --> 01:04:29,040
look at it at the end of this year because I think my homes will be considerably ahead of Jordan Love

1078
01:04:29,840 --> 01:04:40,880
this season. So anyhow Rob you got something? Yeah I do. Alrighty. I'm going off the wall again

1079
01:04:40,880 --> 01:04:52,000
I'm going off the wall again brother. I love it do so please. Oh by the way yeah I know I told you

1080
01:04:52,000 --> 01:05:07,440
a couple nights ago uh-huh um I found MeTV tunes on Brunley TV. Cool. $7.99 a month I get all the

1081
01:05:07,440 --> 01:05:16,880
old cartoons. Cool. I rent it I gotta I gotta watch my own cartoons. Um that is fantastic.

1082
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:23,520
I love that that is fantastic man I am going to check into that and see what I can do.

1083
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:28,800
I would love to go I would love to have something like that. Mr. Magoo got me I have not seen Mr.

1084
01:05:28,800 --> 01:05:35,680
Magoo for how many years? Oh dude I was watching him the other night. Oh he was just fantastic

1085
01:05:35,680 --> 01:05:43,520
wasn't he? Yeah but a lot I know it's a lot of the good ones. Uh-huh. Like Speed Racer and Underdog

1086
01:05:43,520 --> 01:05:51,760
are like 12 12 30 at night. Yeah. I'm not up to watch it then you know and that's the ones I want

1087
01:05:51,760 --> 01:05:59,760
to watch. No I agree. But I'll figure it out a lot of them right now which I'm taking the reason why

1088
01:05:59,760 --> 01:06:07,920
they're doing it the way they are now. They're showing a lot of Bugs Bunny and you know stuff

1089
01:06:07,920 --> 01:06:17,040
like that and I'm thinking because it's because they're just new ones. Uh-huh. Yeah of course

1090
01:06:17,040 --> 01:06:22,560
they're still Bugs Bunny. Give them a little time they'll start showing the other shows. They will

1091
01:06:22,560 --> 01:06:26,320
they will. I know what they're doing is they're getting interest with Bugs Bunny. I'm going to

1092
01:06:26,320 --> 01:06:34,400
quit pay it $7.99 a month. Man that's fantastic. Rob I got some uh okay number one tomorrow.

1093
01:06:34,400 --> 01:06:40,560
I got something else going. Oh you do okay um all right hang on tomorrow do you want to go into two

1094
01:06:40,560 --> 01:06:47,200
uh two truths and one lie. It's a big buzz going on the internet people are doing it and they're

1095
01:06:47,200 --> 01:06:52,480
playing it on TikTok and YouTube and all this stuff. Do you want to do that tomorrow or do you

1096
01:06:52,480 --> 01:06:57,600
want to put it off till next week. Yeah let's do that tomorrow. Okay tomorrow will be two truths

1097
01:06:57,600 --> 01:07:04,800
and one lie and Rob and I will try to guess each other's truths and lies and see if we can figure

1098
01:07:04,800 --> 01:07:13,440
that out. So anyhow Rob you had something you want to go to. Yeah okay let me write that in.

1099
01:07:13,440 --> 01:07:23,520
All right um with the news that Shrek 5 will be released next year. Uh-huh. Some weird and wacky

1100
01:07:23,520 --> 01:07:33,920
fame theories are coming out of the Enchanted Forest. Okay. If you are familiar with the Shrek

1101
01:07:33,920 --> 01:07:42,000
universe you know I've always thought that Lord Farquaad looks like someone but you just can't

1102
01:07:42,000 --> 01:07:46,000
put your finger on it. Uh-huh. Wonder no more.

1103
01:07:50,400 --> 01:08:01,600
Wonder no more. Okay. Podcasts just for nobody want to explore Lord Farquaad's family tree

1104
01:08:03,360 --> 01:08:07,440
and what they uncovered will make you want to move far far away.

1105
01:08:07,440 --> 01:08:12,000
Okay they both have black hair.

1106
01:08:16,160 --> 01:08:21,920
Let's start by talking about who Lord Farquaad's mother is. Okay.

1107
01:08:24,480 --> 01:08:27,840
There's a theory that his mom is Snow White.

1108
01:08:27,840 --> 01:08:36,640
Okay. Can you figure it out? No.

1109
01:08:40,320 --> 01:08:48,640
We see in Shrek he has the magic mirror on the wall. Uh-huh. The same magic mirror that Snow White

1110
01:08:48,640 --> 01:08:59,360
has and that's exactly how he got the magic mirror. Okay. Snow White. Okay. Okay.

1111
01:09:01,440 --> 01:09:09,520
Yeah that really does. Both have black hair. Okay. That's not so uncommon. No no that I would call

1112
01:09:09,520 --> 01:09:20,880
that circumstantial. But then they point out that his outfit choice might be an ash may not be an

1113
01:09:20,880 --> 01:09:29,120
ashman either. Okay. They both had the same puffed sleeves with the same teardrop dread-outs.

1114
01:09:29,120 --> 01:09:39,680
Huh. They do. Yeah that's yeah that's okay.

1115
01:09:42,160 --> 01:09:53,120
Okay so now Lord Farquaad's mom is Snow White. Yeah. Now are you ready? Yes. Who's his daddy?

1116
01:09:53,120 --> 01:10:01,920
Hmm. So then the real question becomes if his mom is Snow White, who's his dad?

1117
01:10:03,680 --> 01:10:12,240
His union liars are about to be peeled. Okay. It's one of the seven dwarfs.

1118
01:10:12,240 --> 01:10:22,080
Okay. Who? They're continued. So there's only one dwarf that has the most in common with Lord Farquaad.

1119
01:10:22,080 --> 01:10:32,080
Uh-huh. If you look at what he wears you will see that he's always in red. He wears a black belt.

1120
01:10:32,080 --> 01:10:46,240
He's not aware of what Grumpy wears. Okay. Lord Farquaad is wearing a mix of Snow White wears

1121
01:10:47,200 --> 01:10:57,120
and what Grumpy wears. Okay. Lord Farquaad is evil so it makes sense that Grumpy would make an evil

1122
01:10:57,120 --> 01:11:09,360
child. I am screaming while some fans are shocked others don't tell to say that'll do donkey that'll do.

1123
01:11:13,440 --> 01:11:21,120
Cool. That's something I told my daughter by the way that'll do donkey that'll do. That'll do donkey that'll do.

1124
01:11:21,120 --> 01:11:30,240
But yeah Snow White they're saying Snow White and Grumpy is Lord Farquaad's parents.

1125
01:11:31,840 --> 01:11:42,640
And after reading this and looking at the facts I can see it. Boss shut up. I could uh I could see

1126
01:11:42,640 --> 01:11:48,880
that too. Thank you Rob. That's pretty cool. Sorry I didn't say something. That's all right. My dogs

1127
01:11:48,880 --> 01:11:57,920
are always barking. I'll give a shit. It's free. Well, Suggs go labs with heat again. Just put it that way.

1128
01:12:00,160 --> 01:12:04,320
Okay. You know I was robbed by six dwarves today Rob.

1129
01:12:04,320 --> 01:12:17,360
You were robbed by what? I was robbed by six dwarves. I was robbed by six dwarves. Not happy.

1130
01:12:18,880 --> 01:12:27,520
All right. Happy was a dwarf. I was robbed by six dwarves. Not seven. Not happy. Not happy. So you got

1131
01:12:27,520 --> 01:12:37,120
robbed by Grumpy. One of them. I don't know. Okay. I've got. Happy was it. Grumpy had been in on him.

1132
01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:46,000
Okay. All right. Yeah Grumpy's always in on him. Isn't he that little bastard. You got robbed from

1133
01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:56,000
Lord Farquaad's dad. Why was he Grumpy then? He was getting ass from Snow White.

1134
01:12:56,000 --> 01:13:02,560
Lord Farquaad's dad. If I had a son like that I'd be Grumpy too. Yeah I guess so. You're right.

1135
01:13:03,680 --> 01:13:11,120
I've got a few questions here. And you and I can both answer them at the same time. Or I mean you

1136
01:13:11,120 --> 01:13:18,640
know one at a time. But okay. Would you rather a store where every item is free or a restaurant

1137
01:13:18,640 --> 01:13:32,560
where every dish is calorie free? I'd rather go first. Me too. And here's why. I don't care about

1138
01:13:32,560 --> 01:13:40,720
calories. I do care about calories. But here's what I look at. I know you do. Every dish that's

1139
01:13:40,720 --> 01:13:44,960
calorie free. You don't know how good it tastes. You don't know if you'll be eating it or not. It

1140
01:13:44,960 --> 01:13:52,000
could be it could taste like ass. It could be kale. You know. You don't know. So I'm gonna have to go

1141
01:13:52,000 --> 01:14:00,880
with every item free and I would be at that store daily wouldn't you? Yeah. I'd be grabbing

1142
01:14:00,880 --> 01:14:05,280
everything. I'd be grabbing shit I don't need and throwing it to people outside when I'm walking off.

1143
01:14:08,640 --> 01:14:14,480
All right. Next one is. Do you believe in passwords or secret handshakes? Which would

1144
01:14:14,480 --> 01:14:22,400
you rather have? So let's say that you're you got a fort okay. And no one. I would rather have

1145
01:14:23,360 --> 01:14:29,440
passwords. I'd rather have passwords too. Handshakes are easy to forget and also people

1146
01:14:29,440 --> 01:14:38,560
can see them and duplicate them. So okay. Next one. Would you rather have loud neighbors or

1147
01:14:38,560 --> 01:14:52,960
nosy neighbors? I think I would rather have nosy neighbors because I would do stuff to to freak them

1148
01:14:52,960 --> 01:14:58,960
out. Like I'd have a room. I'd throw red all over like it was blood splattered and have them freak out.

1149
01:14:58,960 --> 01:15:07,360
I would play I would play recordings of women screaming and shotguns. Anyhow go ahead. I got

1150
01:15:07,360 --> 01:15:15,680
you. I got you on that. Okay. But now that I'm older I think I have to go the other way. Loud neighbors?

1151
01:15:18,000 --> 01:15:23,280
That way you could turn your loud neighbors into landlords and get them in trouble.

1152
01:15:24,640 --> 01:15:30,240
That's a good thought. I'm gonna go with nosy. You're not getting in trouble yourself. You

1153
01:15:30,240 --> 01:15:40,240
you they're being loud. You get there. Yeah. To me there's too much. I'm not saying being noise. No no no no no no. I get what you're saying. If they're being dicks then you got it. Yeah.

1154
01:15:40,800 --> 01:15:48,720
Me I'd rather you. You asked my opinion on this. No no no no no no no. I I uh I want your opinion for a reason.

1155
01:15:48,720 --> 01:15:54,160
This is we just differ on this one. And anyhow I'd rather have nosy neighbors because I would

1156
01:15:54,160 --> 01:16:02,160
constantly fuck with them. Oh yeah yeah yeah I would too but I think I'd rather go with loud

1157
01:16:02,160 --> 01:16:06,960
neighbors. That's cool. I can I can respect that very easily. I get it.

1158
01:16:08,080 --> 01:16:14,480
Um would you rather have babies dressed as animals or animals dressed as humans?

1159
01:16:14,480 --> 01:16:24,480
I'm going to say animals dressed as humans because if you get tired of them you can throw them outside for a little while. Babies you can't do that.

1160
01:16:30,480 --> 01:16:42,480
Well see that's why I was going to go with the opposite. No you're you're welcome to do that Rob. This is just opinions. I I would rather see babies dressed up as animals.

1161
01:16:42,480 --> 01:16:52,480
Okay. I mean I'm a kid lover you know. No I am too but I you know to me I just viewed it differently when I read it.

1162
01:16:52,480 --> 01:17:02,480
I was like well you know what um if they start getting annoying. I have a little lab in here right now with two other male dogs. Yeah I'm a little tired on animals right now.

1163
01:17:02,480 --> 01:17:16,480
Okay okay okay I get it. As a matter of fact my beagles in here whining. I completely respect that Rob. They want to come near me because they know.

1164
01:17:16,480 --> 01:17:26,480
I can't with me now. I can't lay them out of the room you know. Oh I understand. Um. Beagle on gold lab would not make a good mix.

1165
01:17:26,480 --> 01:17:36,480
Um no no um uh. Now when you got another golden lab in the house. Yeah yeah I would keep them apart.

1166
01:17:36,480 --> 01:17:42,480
Um okay bad haircut or bad dye job would you rather.

1167
01:17:42,480 --> 01:17:50,480
I'd rather have bad haircut too because you'd always get another haircut.

1168
01:17:50,480 --> 01:18:01,480
I am all natural. I do not die. I never have. I did when I was younger and had long hair but I don't now. I haven't in a long time.

1169
01:18:01,480 --> 01:18:10,480
So I'm going to say I would rather have. Yeah I remember sunning. Oh yeah. Oh not just that. I mean everything. I remember sunning with you and John. Oh yeah.

1170
01:18:10,480 --> 01:18:22,480
Oh no I progressed. Did I ever? No I did not. That's cool. Um next one. Would you rather have pineapple pizza or candy corn?

1171
01:18:22,480 --> 01:18:34,480
Pineapple pizza all the way. Candy corn. Okay. Next one. Talking pets or talking babies?

1172
01:18:34,480 --> 01:18:41,480
I'd rather go with talking pets. I would love to ask them what they're thinking. Talking pets. All right we're good on that one.

1173
01:18:41,480 --> 01:18:53,480
My my yeah my my big old boss he's getting to talk to me. Yeah we're getting to know each other.

1174
01:18:53,480 --> 01:19:05,480
Okay how about would you rather win the lottery or find your soulmate? Mine's lottery but you might be different.

1175
01:19:05,480 --> 01:19:14,480
You better believe I'm different. All right. I'm ready for my soulmate man. Okay. I wish she would come along soon.

1176
01:19:14,480 --> 01:19:21,480
Okay well you know what I knew we're going to differ on that one definitely. All right that's cool.

1177
01:19:21,480 --> 01:19:31,480
Would you rather have misquoted movies or mistaken lyrics? I would say mistaken lyrics because they're always funny.

1178
01:19:31,480 --> 01:19:39,480
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah you can always make them whatever you want. Yep. Okay and the final one.

1179
01:19:39,480 --> 01:19:49,480
Would you rather have ketchup or ranch if you could only have one of them? Ketchup. Depends on what it's on.

1180
01:19:49,480 --> 01:19:56,480
If I could only have one condiment one or the other I'd rather have ketchup. Yeah let's go ketchup.

1181
01:19:56,480 --> 01:20:04,480
Yeah because you use ketchup on so many more things than ranch and could you imagine not having ketchup on a burger or a fry or a hot dog?

1182
01:20:04,480 --> 01:20:13,480
Hell no. So all right that's all of those. Yeah but I could put ranch on a burger or hot dog too.

1183
01:20:13,480 --> 01:20:20,480
Oh okay if you want to go with ranch you have that right. No no no I gotta go with ketchup.

1184
01:20:20,480 --> 01:20:31,480
Okay all right final answer. Okay you got it. All right Rob are you ready to wrap this bitch up or you got something else you want to go into?

1185
01:20:31,480 --> 01:20:42,480
Actually I think I better wrap it up for the night. All righty Rob thank you. Oh um hello Grandma Opal. Hi Jimmy. Hi Ricky.

1186
01:20:42,480 --> 01:20:51,480
Dodge City Kansas rah rah rah we love you guys. All right everybody thank you for listening.

1187
01:20:51,480 --> 01:21:00,480
I want some feedback on the podcast that I dropped this morning and I want to know what you people think about it.

1188
01:21:00,480 --> 01:21:06,480
If you liked it if you didn't I want honest opinions you're not going to hurt my feelings. If it sucked let me know.

1189
01:21:06,480 --> 01:21:12,480
So anyhow. I'll listen to it in the morning I'll get a hold of you in the morning and let you know what I think.

1190
01:21:12,480 --> 01:21:20,480
Okay that sounds good. I had it. Although I was part of it I should like it. Yeah yep that's true.

1191
01:21:20,480 --> 01:21:26,480
So all right everybody thank you for listening good night assholes. Good night assholes.

1192
01:21:26,480 --> 01:21:36,480
Oh no looks like the show's over kids. Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic. Fear not assholes.

1193
01:21:36,480 --> 01:21:58,480
They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.