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And now it's time for the daily dustbag pledge.

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Two dustbags and a microphone pledge.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to download every show.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to grab family members phones and download the

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show from there.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to go to public computers and download the show

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from there.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to laugh at all the unfunny jokes.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to lie to all my friends and tell them how good

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the show is.

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And finally, I, Joe, or Jane listener promise to visit Montrose, Missouri to take advantage

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of the power plant, campgrounds, and junkyard all within its quarter mile radius.

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Here at Two Dushbags and a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.

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Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong.

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At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys.

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We can and will lie if it makes the story better.

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Two Dushbags and a Microphone.

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We Talk.

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Jesus.

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Hey look, I think we found land.

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Oh my god, I think we're safe.

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Oh no!

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It's the island of horrible jokes.

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Where do polar bears keep their money?

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In a snow bank.

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Two Dushbags and a Microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.

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We offer you first world problems.

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I can't believe the coffee grinder is broke at the big box store.

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There's no way I can be expected to grind my coffee beans every damn morning.

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Tomorrow morning while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte, remember

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to not get your genitals caught in the grinder.

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It really hurts.

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Who can afford plastic surgery?

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Stay safe everyone.

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The apocalypse just happened.

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You don't know what to do.

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You don't know where to go.

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But we can tell you what you can eat.

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During an apocalypse, you will probably need a good insecticide.

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Soybean, corn, and peppermint oil are some plant extracts that create powerful natural

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insecticides.

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They are some of nature's best organic and natural pesticides that when combined can

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make a far more superior weapon that growers can effectively use to improve their integrated

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pest management on their crops or on their person.

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Please enjoy Brick Shithouse Energy Drink responsibly.

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It's not readily available anywhere because of liability issues.

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Two douchebags and a microphone.

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I'm Mark.

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And I am Rob.

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Hey Rob, how are you doing tonight?

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Oh, just tired like normal.

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We've been busy.

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Real busy.

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Real busy.

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Very cool.

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Hi.

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And I can thank the country for buying jet skis.

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Yeah.

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Jet ski trailers and double jet ski trailers.

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They're out of the roof right now.

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They're keeping me open, man.

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That's good.

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That's good.

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We've got flying out the door.

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That's excellent.

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Well, what's up?

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I'll tell you what's up.

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I'm going to go to the

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air base.

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It's post-COVID.

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Everybody's getting back to normal and everyone's making up for the time they missed.

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That's just my thought.

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That's what I think.

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So anyhow, that's good.

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It's good for you.

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It's good for everybody.

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It's good.

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Also, here's what I'm thinking too.

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Gas prices the way they are.

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Yeah.

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More people could afford to fill up jet skis than they could fill up a boat.

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You're right.

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They may still have a boat down there on the lake, but it ain't moving.

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The jet skis are moving.

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I got what you're saying.

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Yeah.

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For the price of gas.

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Oh, gosh.

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Especially on the marinas.

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Marinas are what?

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Six a gallon?

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Yeah.

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They're like at least a dollar more.

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Usually, yeah.

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As I remember, at least a dollar more.

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Sometimes two bucks more.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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It's a trip off because what are you going to do?

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Stop, go back to your dock, drive somewhere.

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You probably had a couple of pops.

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Go get some gas three miles down the road.

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Come back, put it in.

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You're just going to go, okay, I'm going to pay that $5.50 a gallon.

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What the fuck?

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Right?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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So anyhow, I get it.

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We got it.

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Well, I got an invite.

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And anyhow, I had this through Iheart.

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And I don't know if you got an invite too, but I don't think they really know your email

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or anything.

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I got to ask Topher and see because me and his name are still on the podcast, right?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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And anyhow, I can't take it off.

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Because I think Topher has to.

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I think he has the passwords and all that.

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But this is why you may not have gotten an invite.

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But we got an invite to this club of podcasts at Iheart Radio.

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It looks like a pretty cool deal.

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And it's where people exchange information about their podcast, what they do, what they

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say, where they are.

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And from what I understand, it's pretty cool that they choose you to do this.

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They don't do this for everybody.

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So yeah.

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So I guess our listenership is up enough to where they kind of looked over and said, you

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know what?

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Let's send them an invite.

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So I thought that was pretty cool.

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Nothing that we do is going to change or anything like that.

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And you know, it's still going to be.

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Yeah.

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But they're kind of looking at us.

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And I don't know if that means anything at all.

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I have no idea if that means maybe potential advertising.

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I know it means networking where you let other people know, you know, kind of like what we're

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doing to let's get the bottom of that podcast, which is a fantastic podcast.

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Oh, yeah.

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Yeah.

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Oh, I love it.

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And I talked to Jason the other day and I am going to go on his show in August and we're

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going to cross pollinate each other's show.

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So if you like, if you like conspiracy, I can't wait to hear.

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Yeah.

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When you like, if you like conspiracy, maybe we'll give you a call if they have the tech,

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if they have the technology, I'll see if they can't give you a call and we can all talk.

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That sound good?

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I think they do.

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OK.

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OK.

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Yeah.

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They have people call in.

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OK.

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And I think I think he's still like different people call in.

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OK, good.

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That's cool.

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All right.

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Well, we'll figure it out.

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So anyhow, and I've got something a little bit later on that I need to address of why

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we do what we do, because it's really good question because a lot of people know me very

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well.

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A couple of them came up to me, actually three of them.

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And anyhow, I'll get in a little bit later.

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So Coke has just announced its new Olympic themed Coke flavors, Coca-Cola Gold Medal,

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Sprite Wrestling Wild Cherry, Fanta Balance Beam Blast, Minute Maid Pole Vault Punch and

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Minute Maid Long Jump Limeade.

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This is cool.

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I get the gimmick, but I think the powers at Coke missed out on one hell of an opportunity.

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I mean, that would be Ass Funnel Coke or Fanta or Sprite, right?

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Remember the report on the last podcast, the Ass Funnel?

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You know, they they.

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Yeah, they took Marjorie Rita's and funneled them through a chick's ass.

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Well, I mean, why couldn't Sprite, you know, when Fanta and Coke do that, they just call

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it like Ass Funnel or if they want to be even more kid friendly, it could be butt funnel,

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butt funnel Coke, butt funnel Fanta, butt funnel Sprite.

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You get what I'm saying, Rob?

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Doesn't that make sense?

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Yeah, yeah.

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Yeah.

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Well, it's just in style now, I mean, this video got millions of hits.

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So I mean, I think there's an interest in butt funneling anything, right?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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So I think they missed out on that.

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But OK, you know, millions of hits on YouTube means it must be good.

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So anyhow, the celebrity the celebrity golf tournament in Lake Tahoe, Nevada, had a sour

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turn as Jerry Rice entered a verbal spat with Casey Chiefs reporter from StarCave Media,

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Kansas City.

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The reporter recorded himself asking Rice whether Chiefs had a good enough receiving

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corps to win again this year.

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Rice initially ignored the question, but the video cuts a few moments later with two Rice

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approaching the reporter calling him a fucking asshole.

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Another video obtained by TMC says the two going back and forth where Rice can be heard

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saying I will fuck you up.

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Casey is still bitter over the Chiefs beating the 49ers in the Super Bowl.

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And look this up, man.

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He's being a real dick.

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I've always liked Jerry Rice.

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He seemed like a decent guy, but I sore losing.

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He's not even playing on that team.

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You know, I know we beat him two times in the Super Bowl.

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Yeah, that's got to kind of suck.

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But still, you know, the guy was asked a legitimate question from one of the best wide receivers

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ever.

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I don't get it why he was so pissy about it, but whatever.

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So I mean, Jason Kelsey retired and became their biggest fan.

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Rice should embrace the rumor that Rashi Rice is indeed his grandson and root for him, right?

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I guess all the all the all the fake publicity or whatever the rumors about him being related

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Jerry Rice, Rashi Rice isn't true that they know of, right?

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So yeah, he needs to embrace and go, yeah, this is my grandson and I'm going to wear

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a chief's jersey with Rice's number on it, right?

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That's that's how you say, buddy.

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Yeah, hell yeah.

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You know, I mean, I admit at least Montana was a chief for two years and might be comforted

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and knowing when the 49ers were thrown his 37 year old carcass out, the chiefs at the

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time liked rehab projects because they did.

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They had Steve Young and they said, get out of here, Montana.

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We don't give a shit what you did.

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We don't think you're going to do anymore.

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The chiefs got him for two years.

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So you know, you know, I don't think Montana's probably better.

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He may root for the 49ers a little bit more than the chiefs because he played for them

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a lot longer and won championships with them, but he did not with us.

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But I'm pretty sure he still thinks in the back of his head.

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These fucks threw me away for Steve Young.

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Just a thought.

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Come on, Jerry, switch sides.

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The water's warm over here.

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We're ready for you, Jerry.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Come on over, man.

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Chief's kingdom is waiting.

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Come on, Jerry.

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Sit on my lap.

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Come on.

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Come on.

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Come on.

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All the stars are there, Jerry.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I mean, we're welcoming you.

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We're welcoming you to the Kansas City chief's kingdom.

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So come on, Jerry.

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Come on over.

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Yes.

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Yes.

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You need a Fanta or something?

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I can go get you one, Jerry.

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You know, maybe sandwich.

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Okay.

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Anyhow, recently a poll came out about the NFL's unhappiest fans.

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The poll went as such.

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Number one unhappy fan base is the Atlanta Falcons.

260
00:12:42,180 --> 00:12:44,320
I think that's pretty obvious.

261
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,860
They went to one Super Bowl and was kicking the shit out of them.

262
00:12:46,860 --> 00:12:51,820
And then halftime and then third quarter comes up and New England comes back and kicks the

263
00:12:51,820 --> 00:12:54,580
shit out of them and takes the trophy.

264
00:12:54,580 --> 00:12:59,020
And this was right after their owner started dancing on a sideline like they'd won.

265
00:12:59,020 --> 00:13:00,540
So I understand that.

266
00:13:00,540 --> 00:13:01,540
Yeah.

267
00:13:01,540 --> 00:13:08,820
I'd be pretty bitter to number two is our beloved Kansas City chief's fandoms.

268
00:13:08,820 --> 00:13:12,380
Number three, and I'll have more to say about that here in a minute.

269
00:13:12,380 --> 00:13:15,340
Number three is Seattle Seahawks.

270
00:13:15,340 --> 00:13:16,980
I would have to agree with that.

271
00:13:16,980 --> 00:13:20,860
I know some Seahawks fans and they are rather bitter.

272
00:13:20,860 --> 00:13:24,020
The whole Russell Wilson thing going to hell.

273
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:25,020
Steve Carolley.

274
00:13:25,020 --> 00:13:26,300
No, not Steve Carolley.

275
00:13:26,300 --> 00:13:27,460
Pete Carroll leaving.

276
00:13:27,460 --> 00:13:29,500
No, I understand.

277
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:30,500
They got some frustrations.

278
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:34,260
You know, at least they did go to two Super Bowls and they won one of them.

279
00:13:34,260 --> 00:13:38,460
So anyhow, let's see Seattle.

280
00:13:38,460 --> 00:13:41,140
Number four is the Buffalo Bills fan base.

281
00:13:41,140 --> 00:13:44,460
And yeah, and I could tell you why they're so frustrated.

282
00:13:44,460 --> 00:13:48,740
You can look at number 15 in Kansas City and you can see why they're so frustrated.

283
00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:53,580
If it wasn't number 15 in Kansas City, they may have a trophy or two.

284
00:13:53,580 --> 00:13:57,980
But the thing is, is he's a guy that cannot get past, at least not yet.

285
00:13:57,980 --> 00:13:59,580
We'll see if they will.

286
00:13:59,580 --> 00:14:03,180
So anyhow, number five is the Dallas Cowboy fans.

287
00:14:03,180 --> 00:14:06,860
Yeah, I mean, you hear him talking.

288
00:14:06,860 --> 00:14:10,020
You think they won 30 Super Bowls in a row.

289
00:14:10,020 --> 00:14:11,020
And then you look at.

290
00:14:11,020 --> 00:14:14,020
I think they have every right.

291
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:15,020
Yeah.

292
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:22,060
So anyhow, I can I can speak for the chiefs, even though I don't really trust a poll like

293
00:14:22,060 --> 00:14:23,420
this.

294
00:14:23,420 --> 00:14:28,020
We the chiefs fans are unhappy because we never get to watch our guys in the Pro Bowl

295
00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:32,780
and we never and then we have to take a vacation day in the middle of February for the victory

296
00:14:32,780 --> 00:14:37,500
parade and then the extremely high ticket prices.

297
00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:38,780
Yeah.

298
00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:40,300
So yeah, that's why we're better.

299
00:14:40,300 --> 00:14:44,700
That's why we're unhappy is all of those can watch our guys in the Pro Bowl.

300
00:14:44,700 --> 00:14:49,120
We have to take a vacation day in the middle of February to stand out there on Grand Avenue

301
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:50,120
in the cold.

302
00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,880
Yeah, it's great.

303
00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:53,500
Victory parade, but at the same time.

304
00:14:53,500 --> 00:14:59,060
So we're probably are a little unhappy about that, but pretty happy about everything else.

305
00:14:59,060 --> 00:15:02,660
The extremely high ticket prices that you get with the team of the elite.

306
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:04,820
And that's the way it is.

307
00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:11,780
And you know, the best team in the NFL, three out of five years is why all of that exists.

308
00:15:11,780 --> 00:15:13,740
So you can call it better.

309
00:15:13,740 --> 00:15:15,020
You can call it unhappy.

310
00:15:15,020 --> 00:15:19,860
You can call it whatever I call it, winning and the price of right.

311
00:15:19,860 --> 00:15:21,860
Right.

312
00:15:21,860 --> 00:15:23,620
All right.

313
00:15:23,620 --> 00:15:27,100
Death Valley reached a horrible milestone.

314
00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:33,100
The forecast of one hundred and thirty degrees will be the hottest temperature ever recorded

315
00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:34,100
in America.

316
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:37,100
Oh, could you fucking believe it?

317
00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:43,620
I mean, they have the record so far.

318
00:15:43,620 --> 00:15:45,980
Yeah, I know.

319
00:15:45,980 --> 00:15:46,980
I think this is your.

320
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:52,940
I think it's like twenty four, one twenty four or something like that.

321
00:15:52,940 --> 00:15:54,940
It was in the lower 20s.

322
00:15:54,940 --> 00:15:55,940
Yeah.

323
00:15:55,940 --> 00:16:00,580
I think this year we might find out cactuses have their limits as well.

324
00:16:00,580 --> 00:16:05,060
I'll bet you it's so hot that cactuses die.

325
00:16:05,060 --> 00:16:07,940
So we'll see.

326
00:16:07,940 --> 00:16:14,440
Mount Everest has reported 40 tons of trash and at least 30 dead people.

327
00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:15,700
This has led to the.

328
00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:16,700
Yes.

329
00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:21,820
People go up there, climb the mountain, leave their trash and then people die doing that.

330
00:16:21,820 --> 00:16:24,780
And people aren't going to go up there and retrieve a body and bring them back down.

331
00:16:24,780 --> 00:16:26,300
It's too far.

332
00:16:26,300 --> 00:16:29,420
So you have to try.

333
00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:30,420
They could pick up their trash.

334
00:16:30,420 --> 00:16:32,020
Yes, but they don't.

335
00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:33,020
Because why?

336
00:16:33,020 --> 00:16:35,020
They're shitty human beings that do this.

337
00:16:35,020 --> 00:16:36,180
That's why.

338
00:16:36,180 --> 00:16:41,620
So and then what I'm saying is the one is the one that leaves the trash and then die.

339
00:16:41,620 --> 00:16:42,620
Oh, yeah.

340
00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:47,060
Maybe they are related to the body.

341
00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:48,860
They ain't going to pick up the trash.

342
00:16:48,860 --> 00:16:50,980
Yeah, maybe they were like carrying around a trash bag.

343
00:16:50,980 --> 00:16:51,980
Then they died.

344
00:16:51,980 --> 00:16:53,540
Then the trash bag went in the wind.

345
00:16:53,540 --> 00:16:55,340
That could be very easily.

346
00:16:55,340 --> 00:16:57,340
OK, all right.

347
00:16:57,340 --> 00:16:58,340
I'll take that.

348
00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:01,540
That might be the balloons hitting in Korea.

349
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,580
It could be the shit balloons.

350
00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:10,140
Yeah, that could actually be Mount Everest trash floating over a tank.

351
00:17:10,140 --> 00:17:11,140
I'll bet you it is.

352
00:17:11,140 --> 00:17:12,140
You know what?

353
00:17:12,140 --> 00:17:18,380
I'm going to check into this and I will have a full report on the on the seventh show of

354
00:17:18,380 --> 00:17:19,380
this week.

355
00:17:19,380 --> 00:17:20,380
OK, that sound good?

356
00:17:20,380 --> 00:17:21,380
All right.

357
00:17:21,380 --> 00:17:22,380
All right.

358
00:17:22,380 --> 00:17:23,380
Good.

359
00:17:23,380 --> 00:17:24,380
All right.

360
00:17:24,380 --> 00:17:25,380
Full report.

361
00:17:25,380 --> 00:17:26,380
Two pages.

362
00:17:26,380 --> 00:17:28,700
Anyhow, OK, 30 dead people.

363
00:17:28,700 --> 00:17:31,020
This has led to the closure of the mountain.

364
00:17:31,020 --> 00:17:33,420
OK, here's what I'm thinking.

365
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:36,420
OK, go ahead and let people climb the mountain.

366
00:17:36,420 --> 00:17:38,060
But with a couple of rules.

367
00:17:38,060 --> 00:17:45,020
One, they have to retrieve three bags of trash and one dead person.

368
00:17:45,020 --> 00:17:46,020
That's how you solve it.

369
00:17:46,020 --> 00:17:47,020
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

370
00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:53,900
You can climb the mountain, come back with three bags of trash and one dead person and

371
00:17:53,900 --> 00:17:55,900
everything's fine.

372
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,060
Other than that, keep your ass on the flat.

373
00:17:58,060 --> 00:18:02,340
If you can't do all that, then you don't go up there.

374
00:18:02,340 --> 00:18:05,260
All it takes is just a little thought.

375
00:18:05,260 --> 00:18:06,260
Right, Rob?

376
00:18:06,260 --> 00:18:07,260
Yeah, yeah.

377
00:18:07,260 --> 00:18:09,780
I mean, everybody needs to pitch in.

378
00:18:09,780 --> 00:18:11,340
Yeah, that's right.

379
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:16,780
Remember those old trash containers that had the guy like throwing a bag or something,

380
00:18:16,780 --> 00:18:20,380
a waddle up bag into the trash can and said, pitch in?

381
00:18:20,380 --> 00:18:21,380
Remember that?

382
00:18:21,380 --> 00:18:22,380
Yeah, yeah.

383
00:18:22,380 --> 00:18:23,380
Yeah.

384
00:18:23,380 --> 00:18:27,620
We could put that like on a couple of signs on your way up and they go, oh, yeah, yeah,

385
00:18:27,620 --> 00:18:28,860
I remember that pitching guy.

386
00:18:28,860 --> 00:18:29,860
Hell, hell, yeah.

387
00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:31,140
I'll do that.

388
00:18:31,140 --> 00:18:37,900
So now just in time for Labor Day, a brand new Tony Iommi photo book, not phone book,

389
00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:40,940
photo book is up for sale to the public.

390
00:18:40,940 --> 00:18:43,020
What does this have to do with Labor Day?

391
00:18:43,020 --> 00:18:44,500
Absolutely nothing.

392
00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:48,580
I can think about of, but it's the next closest holiday.

393
00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:52,580
So buy one for Labor Day.

394
00:18:52,580 --> 00:18:57,740
So I mean, I could say for Christmas, but how far off are we?

395
00:18:57,740 --> 00:19:00,940
Oh, I got it.

396
00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:02,380
Five months.

397
00:19:02,380 --> 00:19:08,140
Buy one for Christmas for somebody or a couple, read them and you'll have it read by the time

398
00:19:08,140 --> 00:19:12,100
Christmas rolls around and then re-gift it.

399
00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:14,660
That's what you do.

400
00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:17,220
That's called using your noggin, right Rob?

401
00:19:17,220 --> 00:19:19,420
Yeah, sounds good.

402
00:19:19,420 --> 00:19:22,500
Well, yeah, that's a brutal idea.

403
00:19:22,500 --> 00:19:27,500
And I've got one more thing here that I'd like to say.

404
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:34,260
Will this apparent assassination attempt maybe quell the fever pitch of insults and accusations

405
00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:35,580
from both sides?

406
00:19:35,580 --> 00:19:39,220
Do you think maybe it's a moment of clarity?

407
00:19:39,220 --> 00:19:45,820
Think maybe they're going, okay, this has gone too far.

408
00:19:45,820 --> 00:19:52,180
Maybe some good lessons can be taught from such a cowardly and despicable act.

409
00:19:52,180 --> 00:19:57,260
I certainly hope this can be a time of reflection upon us as a nation as supposedly carrying

410
00:19:57,260 --> 00:20:00,020
loving humans, right?

411
00:20:00,020 --> 00:20:01,260
Right.

412
00:20:01,260 --> 00:20:06,940
Rob, I turn to you.

413
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:13,780
Okay, this goes to Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri.

414
00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:16,100
Oh yeah, yeah, yep.

415
00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:19,100
The base, yep.

416
00:20:19,100 --> 00:20:28,660
Fort Leonard Wood's family and morale welfare and recreation will host Gary Sinise and the

417
00:20:28,660 --> 00:20:36,780
Lieutenant Band Band live in Converse on July 26th at Gerrard Field.

418
00:20:36,780 --> 00:20:39,460
I love Gary Sinise and I love his band.

419
00:20:39,460 --> 00:20:40,460
He is so patriotic.

420
00:20:40,460 --> 00:20:41,460
But anyhow, go ahead.

421
00:20:41,460 --> 00:20:51,140
The band, which is now a Gary Sinise Foundation program, uplifts and celebrates our nation's

422
00:20:51,140 --> 00:20:58,340
defenders and their families and the date has performed more than 560 concerts around

423
00:20:58,340 --> 00:20:59,340
the globe.

424
00:20:59,340 --> 00:21:07,380
Gates open at 5 p.m. with the Lieutenant Band Band taking the stage at 7 p.m.

425
00:21:07,380 --> 00:21:08,380
That would be cool to watch.

426
00:21:08,380 --> 00:21:12,420
The concert, yeah, it would be.

427
00:21:12,420 --> 00:21:18,820
The concert is free and open to those who have access to Fort Leonard Wood.

428
00:21:18,820 --> 00:21:20,540
Very cool.

429
00:21:20,540 --> 00:21:29,100
The Lieutenant Band Band, founded by actor and humanitarian Gary Sinise in 2003, is a

430
00:21:29,100 --> 00:21:35,740
co-band known for its energetic performances and support for those who have grarically

431
00:21:35,740 --> 00:21:42,740
served, including military, veterans, first responders, and their families.

432
00:21:42,740 --> 00:21:51,020
And after Sinise's iconic character, Lieutenant Dan Taylor, in the Academy Award winning film

433
00:21:51,020 --> 00:21:59,380
Forrest Gump, which recently celebrated its 30th anniversary on July 6th, the band boasts

434
00:21:59,380 --> 00:22:08,060
morale on military bases at home and abroad and raised awareness to benefit concerts across

435
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:11,060
the country.

436
00:22:11,060 --> 00:22:12,060
Awesome.

437
00:22:12,060 --> 00:22:15,180
Gary Sinise is so-

438
00:22:15,180 --> 00:22:16,820
I would love to see that.

439
00:22:16,820 --> 00:22:17,820
I would too.

440
00:22:17,820 --> 00:22:20,480
And he does so much for military veterans.

441
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,980
He is such a great guy.

442
00:22:22,980 --> 00:22:29,740
He's not your typical Hollywood type snob, allegedly.

443
00:22:29,740 --> 00:22:36,580
Yeah, and that's only an hour from here, but I don't have access to the base.

444
00:22:36,580 --> 00:22:37,900
Yeah, yeah.

445
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:40,660
That would be very cool to watch though, wouldn't it?

446
00:22:40,660 --> 00:22:42,780
Yes, it would.

447
00:22:42,780 --> 00:22:44,640
I don't think he does this for money.

448
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:46,820
I think he only goes to military bases.

449
00:22:46,820 --> 00:22:47,820
It's all charity.

450
00:22:47,820 --> 00:22:48,820
Yeah, it's all charity.

451
00:22:48,820 --> 00:22:55,900
Yeah, I don't think you'll ever catch him- For the families and the people.

452
00:22:55,900 --> 00:22:56,900
That's great.

453
00:22:56,900 --> 00:22:58,900
You'll never see him at the Uptown.

454
00:22:58,900 --> 00:23:02,460
You'll never see him at the Ozark amphitheater, none of that.

455
00:23:02,460 --> 00:23:04,540
Because he's not doing it for money.

456
00:23:04,540 --> 00:23:06,740
He's doing this for charity to help veterans.

457
00:23:06,740 --> 00:23:08,740
That's like the USO.

458
00:23:08,740 --> 00:23:09,740
Yes.

459
00:23:09,740 --> 00:23:10,740
Yeah, you're right.

460
00:23:10,740 --> 00:23:11,740
He's just like that.

461
00:23:11,740 --> 00:23:14,740
And I respect that guy so much.

462
00:23:14,740 --> 00:23:19,740
And especially to be that level of a star in Hollywood and to still be untouched or

463
00:23:19,740 --> 00:23:23,140
unscathed or skewed.

464
00:23:23,140 --> 00:23:24,140
You know?

465
00:23:24,140 --> 00:23:25,140
Yeah.

466
00:23:25,140 --> 00:23:27,680
Yeah, so anyhow, thank you Gary Sinise.

467
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:28,900
You're a hell of a guy.

468
00:23:28,900 --> 00:23:29,900
We appreciate it.

469
00:23:29,900 --> 00:23:30,900
Yes, you are.

470
00:23:30,900 --> 00:23:31,900
Thank you.

471
00:23:31,900 --> 00:23:35,580
You want to take our first break and we're going to come back with a little something

472
00:23:35,580 --> 00:23:40,380
that is what I alluded to at the first of the program.

473
00:23:40,380 --> 00:23:45,060
People that know me really well had a couple of questions and I'm going to go ahead and

474
00:23:45,060 --> 00:23:50,060
answer them right now on the podcast because I think they probably need to be answered.

475
00:23:50,060 --> 00:23:52,140
So anyhow, we'll be right back.

476
00:23:52,140 --> 00:23:57,540
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

477
00:23:57,540 --> 00:24:00,380
It's strange insults from an alien.

478
00:24:00,380 --> 00:24:01,940
Real hilarity.

479
00:24:01,940 --> 00:24:07,420
You are the human equivalent to a participation trophy.

480
00:24:07,420 --> 00:24:15,900
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

481
00:24:15,900 --> 00:24:18,380
How does a butterfly take a dump?

482
00:24:18,380 --> 00:24:20,300
It never stops long enough.

483
00:24:20,300 --> 00:24:23,120
Maybe it just shits while lofting.

484
00:24:23,120 --> 00:24:29,060
Maybe it shits real quick while chewing flowers.

485
00:24:29,060 --> 00:24:36,780
I may never know.

486
00:24:36,780 --> 00:24:51,100
The mama's so fat, Dracula bit her neck and got diabetes.

487
00:24:51,100 --> 00:24:54,100
Next up, things overheard in hell.

488
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:59,220
Dishwater has the top ten spots on Billboard Hot 100.

489
00:24:59,220 --> 00:25:03,820
Please remember to go to Cole's dressing room, wait five minutes and scream, hey, there's

490
00:25:03,820 --> 00:25:04,820
no toilet paper in here.

491
00:25:04,820 --> 00:25:07,820
This is Chicago.

492
00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:22,580
I am the most dangerous city in North America.

493
00:25:22,580 --> 00:25:24,580
You can't touch me.

494
00:25:24,580 --> 00:25:25,580
Oh yeah?

495
00:25:25,580 --> 00:25:26,580
This is Kansas City here.

496
00:25:26,580 --> 00:25:27,580
Hold my beer, bitch.

497
00:25:27,580 --> 00:25:31,260
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

498
00:25:31,260 --> 00:25:34,140
It's strange insults from an alien.

499
00:25:34,140 --> 00:25:35,140
Real hilarity.

500
00:25:35,140 --> 00:25:43,100
You are dressed like an assistant debate coach at an Ohio State middle school.

501
00:25:43,100 --> 00:25:44,100
Hey there, fuckstick.

502
00:25:44,100 --> 00:25:49,020
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.

503
00:25:49,020 --> 00:26:07,220
The very last meal on the Titanic before it went down was lamb with mint sauce.

504
00:26:07,220 --> 00:26:14,420
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

505
00:26:14,420 --> 00:26:19,180
Let's see, if I identify as a dog and I start wandering around the block without a collar

506
00:26:19,180 --> 00:26:24,180
on, could animal control come by and pick me up?

507
00:26:24,180 --> 00:26:38,180
I may never know.

508
00:26:38,180 --> 00:26:47,540
Two douchebags and a microphone.

509
00:26:47,540 --> 00:26:48,540
I'm Mark.

510
00:26:48,540 --> 00:26:51,540
And I'm Rob.

511
00:26:51,540 --> 00:27:01,380
Alright, well, some people that know me very well know that I am a conspiracy theorist.

512
00:27:01,380 --> 00:27:03,560
I love conspiracy theories.

513
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,340
I always make up my own in my mind of what could have happened.

514
00:27:07,340 --> 00:27:12,580
My mind races all the time and I enjoy that type of a thing.

515
00:27:12,580 --> 00:27:15,980
And I was, there's two things I was going to do if I did a podcast.

516
00:27:15,980 --> 00:27:24,860
It was either going to be a conspiracy or related podcast or it was going to be humor.

517
00:27:24,860 --> 00:27:29,900
And I decided to go with crude humor but here is what I would like people to know and I

518
00:27:29,900 --> 00:27:33,340
even had an email about this too.

519
00:27:33,340 --> 00:27:38,820
So anyhow, so you know I love conspiracy theories and my mind goes all over with what could

520
00:27:38,820 --> 00:27:40,420
be.

521
00:27:40,420 --> 00:27:44,180
So I had several people that know me very well over the span of two plus years doing

522
00:27:44,180 --> 00:27:46,460
this here train wreck.

523
00:27:46,460 --> 00:27:52,340
Why in the world would you decide to do a crude humor comedy themed podcast?

524
00:27:52,340 --> 00:27:53,660
Let me start by saying this.

525
00:27:53,660 --> 00:27:58,060
I already have a good theory on that Trump would be assassin but this is not for the

526
00:27:58,060 --> 00:27:59,060
show.

527
00:27:59,060 --> 00:28:00,820
This is not the show for that.

528
00:28:00,820 --> 00:28:02,660
But I already have a theory on what it was.

529
00:28:02,660 --> 00:28:06,580
I already have a conspiracy about what it is.

530
00:28:06,580 --> 00:28:09,740
But that's not what we do here.

531
00:28:09,740 --> 00:28:13,860
In August I will be appearing on the podcast that us here at Two Douchebags in Microphone

532
00:28:13,860 --> 00:28:14,860
Love.

533
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:16,300
Let's get to the bottom of that.

534
00:28:16,300 --> 00:28:18,260
It is a fantastic podcast.

535
00:28:18,260 --> 00:28:22,220
They are a conspiracy podcast and they go into it.

536
00:28:22,220 --> 00:28:23,260
They go into everything.

537
00:28:23,260 --> 00:28:27,020
They're not afraid to touch it.

538
00:28:27,020 --> 00:28:28,020
They are.

539
00:28:28,020 --> 00:28:29,020
They are clever.

540
00:28:29,020 --> 00:28:32,820
They are educated and they are really good at what they do.

541
00:28:32,820 --> 00:28:34,660
So if you get time check them out.

542
00:28:34,660 --> 00:28:37,980
I guarantee you will love that podcast too.

543
00:28:37,980 --> 00:28:45,340
So here is why I decided to go the route I did because everybody knows that I love conspiracies

544
00:28:45,340 --> 00:28:47,420
and they're like why don't you do that or sports.

545
00:28:47,420 --> 00:28:49,420
You're such a sports guy.

546
00:28:49,420 --> 00:28:50,860
So I got a lot of that.

547
00:28:50,860 --> 00:28:56,740
It's like why did you decide to do that type of radio or not radio but that radio type

548
00:28:56,740 --> 00:28:58,540
that thing of the past or whatever.

549
00:28:58,540 --> 00:29:03,620
So anyhow I always loved FM, Morden Radio.

550
00:29:03,620 --> 00:29:09,300
I remember way back listening to Dick and Jay on KY102 and the Theater of the Mind they

551
00:29:09,300 --> 00:29:11,100
did so well.

552
00:29:11,100 --> 00:29:12,280
They faked remotes.

553
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:17,580
They faked driving to other cities in Missouri and really set a perfect example of how Theater

554
00:29:17,580 --> 00:29:20,700
of the Mind should sound like.

555
00:29:20,700 --> 00:29:25,640
There was Dr. Domeno, Stan Freberg and then you had local ones that did a really good

556
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:29,900
job at Theater of the Mind too like Von Mack with his all night rock and roll cafe.

557
00:29:29,900 --> 00:29:30,900
Do you remember that Rob?

558
00:29:30,900 --> 00:29:33,900
Yes, I do remember that one.

559
00:29:33,900 --> 00:29:36,860
Yeah, he used to take requests and it sounded like he was in a cafe.

560
00:29:36,860 --> 00:29:39,020
You hear people back there ordering.

561
00:29:39,020 --> 00:29:42,620
Hear dishes being passed around.

562
00:29:42,620 --> 00:29:43,880
Coffee being served.

563
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:48,740
It was really cool and that you knew wasn't true.

564
00:29:48,740 --> 00:29:51,260
You knew it wasn't an all night cafe where he was at.

565
00:29:51,260 --> 00:29:54,780
But it was so good that you actually had the feeling like he was there.

566
00:29:54,780 --> 00:29:56,980
And Von Mack took requests.

567
00:29:56,980 --> 00:30:00,020
You could call up there and go, hey, I want to hear this.

568
00:30:00,020 --> 00:30:05,820
And they go, yeah, yeah, Mark is really bored and he's sitting, I don't know, sitting in

569
00:30:05,820 --> 00:30:06,940
his back room.

570
00:30:06,940 --> 00:30:10,700
Everyone else is asleep and he wants to hear this.

571
00:30:10,700 --> 00:30:12,820
And he was really good at it.

572
00:30:12,820 --> 00:30:14,140
I think he's still around.

573
00:30:14,140 --> 00:30:15,140
I don't know.

574
00:30:15,140 --> 00:30:16,820
Anyhow.

575
00:30:16,820 --> 00:30:19,640
So his all night rock and roll cafe was really good.

576
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:25,020
I enjoyed the humor of the person you couldn't see, but you knew what he looked like in your

577
00:30:25,020 --> 00:30:26,020
mind, right?

578
00:30:26,020 --> 00:30:29,220
Remember you developed what this guy looked like in your own mind.

579
00:30:29,220 --> 00:30:30,220
Right.

580
00:30:30,220 --> 00:30:31,220
Yeah.

581
00:30:31,220 --> 00:30:32,500
And I always loved that.

582
00:30:32,500 --> 00:30:37,340
So even when I saw some of them on remotes and they didn't look one ounce what I dreamed

583
00:30:37,340 --> 00:30:41,740
up, when I went home and listened, they were still in my mind what I thought their voice

584
00:30:41,740 --> 00:30:42,740
looked like.

585
00:30:42,740 --> 00:30:45,980
You know, I remember I saw Dick Wilson.

586
00:30:45,980 --> 00:30:48,980
I'm like, what?

587
00:30:48,980 --> 00:30:51,580
I love the guy.

588
00:30:51,580 --> 00:30:52,740
Love the guy.

589
00:30:52,740 --> 00:30:56,020
But he does not look like what he did on the air to me.

590
00:30:56,020 --> 00:31:00,220
No, no, he does not.

591
00:31:00,220 --> 00:31:04,260
So you know, yeah.

592
00:31:04,260 --> 00:31:08,820
So anyhow, you know, whenever I went and listened to them, they still looked like what I thought

593
00:31:08,820 --> 00:31:12,260
they should look like according to their voice, which is very cool.

594
00:31:12,260 --> 00:31:17,180
Also kept with the times, the Randy Miller and his skits like the Mission Hillbillies

595
00:31:17,180 --> 00:31:19,180
and the Plaza Patrol.

596
00:31:19,180 --> 00:31:21,620
That was really, really good radio back then.

597
00:31:21,620 --> 00:31:23,020
It used to keep me entertained.

598
00:31:23,020 --> 00:31:25,700
I used to laugh and go, man, how do these guys do it?

599
00:31:25,700 --> 00:31:27,820
How they keep coming up with this cool shit.

600
00:31:27,820 --> 00:31:29,380
Especially Mission Hillbillies.

601
00:31:29,380 --> 00:31:31,540
Oh, that was funnier than hell.

602
00:31:31,540 --> 00:31:33,220
That was hilarious.

603
00:31:33,220 --> 00:31:34,220
It was.

604
00:31:34,220 --> 00:31:35,220
Yeah, it was perfect.

605
00:31:35,220 --> 00:31:42,540
And it was perfect for the times because that's when they had those those the mission cops,

606
00:31:42,540 --> 00:31:43,540
I believe, was it?

607
00:31:43,540 --> 00:31:45,100
No, no, no, that's a Plaza Cops.

608
00:31:45,100 --> 00:31:49,500
OK, the Plaza Patrol was the Plaza Cops that were going around on bicycles.

609
00:31:49,500 --> 00:31:53,180
Anyhow, I got it a little bit mixed up, but it was great.

610
00:31:53,180 --> 00:31:57,980
So anyhow, Max Floyd and company doing crazy skits.

611
00:31:57,980 --> 00:32:01,940
If there was something weird going on, is usually Max Tana and Moffat that were behind

612
00:32:01,940 --> 00:32:02,940
it.

613
00:32:02,940 --> 00:32:07,740
They were really good at what they did and they they hold a part of it.

614
00:32:07,740 --> 00:32:12,420
But really in my formative years like Dick and Jay and Randy Miller were the ones that

615
00:32:12,420 --> 00:32:15,100
really, really got me early on.

616
00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:16,340
And yeah, I thought they're great.

617
00:32:16,340 --> 00:32:20,740
So you know, so then I I admired a lot of syndicated shows.

618
00:32:20,740 --> 00:32:23,500
I get them whether they were in Kansas City or not.

619
00:32:23,500 --> 00:32:25,300
I would find a way to get them.

620
00:32:25,300 --> 00:32:31,340
OK, so anyhow, so the syndicated shows that I really love was like Bubba the Love Sponge.

621
00:32:31,340 --> 00:32:35,720
I would have to catch him on the Internet because he was never in Kansas City.

622
00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:39,660
The closest he was was Wichita and some independent station.

623
00:32:39,660 --> 00:32:43,140
And you couldn't hurt it was like an AM thing, I think, and it really wasn't that.

624
00:32:43,140 --> 00:32:45,020
But anyhow, we couldn't get it here.

625
00:32:45,020 --> 00:32:51,060
I listen to Man Cow a lot and Bob and Tom and I thought they all did great radio.

626
00:32:51,060 --> 00:32:56,780
Bob and Tom was the lesser of them for me because that was like, I don't know, too

627
00:32:56,780 --> 00:32:57,780
too controlled.

628
00:32:57,780 --> 00:33:00,380
They what they do is great.

629
00:33:00,380 --> 00:33:05,980
But I mean, you know, they'd have like a bit, a bit, a bit than a than a comedian come on.

630
00:33:05,980 --> 00:33:11,780
It was still good, but it wasn't up there like all the people I just spoke about.

631
00:33:11,780 --> 00:33:12,780
But I would listen to him.

632
00:33:12,780 --> 00:33:14,380
I did enjoy it.

633
00:33:14,380 --> 00:33:18,740
So anyhow, Johnny Dare had some really good radio as well.

634
00:33:18,740 --> 00:33:25,500
So in this very primitive and probably not nearly as talented podcast, we as in First

635
00:33:25,500 --> 00:33:33,340
Topher and I as in now Rob and I tried to salute the brand of that show that has been

636
00:33:33,340 --> 00:33:41,380
destroyed by huge corporations and decimated and kicked off and disgraced and what have

637
00:33:41,380 --> 00:33:42,380
you.

638
00:33:42,380 --> 00:33:44,580
I really hope we can fill some of that void.

639
00:33:44,580 --> 00:33:48,780
And I really hope that people enjoy it.

640
00:33:48,780 --> 00:33:54,500
Look, we're not nearly in my opinion, we're not nearly as talented as those guys.

641
00:33:54,500 --> 00:33:56,820
And also, we don't have nearly the setup.

642
00:33:56,820 --> 00:33:59,580
I mean, this is a very primitive operation we have here.

643
00:33:59,580 --> 00:34:00,960
And it does show.

644
00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:04,540
And I would say I would like to think that some of our stuff is somewhat original and

645
00:34:04,540 --> 00:34:05,580
somewhat funny.

646
00:34:05,580 --> 00:34:10,120
And I hope that this fills a void of stuff you don't get anymore.

647
00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:14,740
So that is why I decided to go into this type of crude humor.

648
00:34:14,740 --> 00:34:18,260
And if you notice, we're not really that crude anymore.

649
00:34:18,260 --> 00:34:22,060
Whenever Rob and I are talking, we kind of came to a happy medium.

650
00:34:22,060 --> 00:34:25,100
Yeah, we came to a happy medium.

651
00:34:25,100 --> 00:34:26,460
The bits are going to be crude.

652
00:34:26,460 --> 00:34:27,460
They're going to be crude.

653
00:34:27,460 --> 00:34:28,460
All of those are.

654
00:34:28,460 --> 00:34:29,460
Yeah, there's going to be a lot of crude ones.

655
00:34:29,460 --> 00:34:32,500
And some of them are going to be thought provoking, whatever.

656
00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:39,260
But we think we've come to a happy medium of a little crude, a little safe, a little

657
00:34:39,260 --> 00:34:41,100
anything, whatever.

658
00:34:41,100 --> 00:34:44,040
So anyhow, that is why I decided to do this.

659
00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:47,400
And we really enjoy doing this.

660
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:48,400
And I hope you do too.

661
00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:51,700
Judging by our numbers, I would say a lot of people feel the same way.

662
00:34:51,700 --> 00:34:52,940
So thank you.

663
00:34:52,940 --> 00:34:56,920
And I've got to get back on that I heart thing and see what's all available.

664
00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:57,920
It's really cool.

665
00:34:57,920 --> 00:35:03,100
It's a big networking thing that they extended an offer to us.

666
00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:04,980
So that's pretty cool.

667
00:35:04,980 --> 00:35:09,180
Anyhow, Rob, any questions about that at all?

668
00:35:09,180 --> 00:35:12,180
Is there any questions that you want to ask me about the whole thing?

669
00:35:12,180 --> 00:35:14,180
No, no.

670
00:35:14,180 --> 00:35:17,180
I don't have any.

671
00:35:17,180 --> 00:35:19,340
Yeah, I mean.

672
00:35:19,340 --> 00:35:23,260
I understand that it was you and Topher.

673
00:35:23,260 --> 00:35:28,340
Yeah, I ever most of everything's in your in your guys' names so far.

674
00:35:28,340 --> 00:35:34,340
So I'm going to be working on that because I think you deserve to have your name up there

675
00:35:34,340 --> 00:35:35,340
with us.

676
00:35:35,340 --> 00:35:36,940
I mean, it could be a three way bill, whatever.

677
00:35:36,940 --> 00:35:39,540
And Topher still contributes to the show, too.

678
00:35:39,540 --> 00:35:41,020
Yeah, he does.

679
00:35:41,020 --> 00:35:42,020
Yeah.

680
00:35:42,020 --> 00:35:44,740
And we welcome anything that he can put out.

681
00:35:44,740 --> 00:35:46,020
The guy is so nice.

682
00:35:46,020 --> 00:35:50,820
He sent me a mic stand yesterday in the mail for my studio.

683
00:35:50,820 --> 00:35:51,820
That's how cool he is.

684
00:35:51,820 --> 00:35:58,380
Yeah, and it's actually for my guitar, you know, to where you can play and hear yourself

685
00:35:58,380 --> 00:35:59,380
really well.

686
00:35:59,380 --> 00:36:03,940
But it can also be doubled up if I need to for a podcasting mic, too.

687
00:36:03,940 --> 00:36:06,660
But so, so cool of him.

688
00:36:06,660 --> 00:36:07,660
He's great guy.

689
00:36:07,660 --> 00:36:08,820
I'm going to meet with him tomorrow.

690
00:36:08,820 --> 00:36:11,900
We're going to have our coffee and we're going to bullshit and motherfuck everybody.

691
00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:12,940
We can get around.

692
00:36:12,940 --> 00:36:13,940
So anyhow.

693
00:36:13,940 --> 00:36:20,300
OK, Rob, I'm glad that you, you know, you don't have a like, you know what's going on,

694
00:36:20,300 --> 00:36:21,300
you know?

695
00:36:21,300 --> 00:36:23,500
I just like it and all that.

696
00:36:23,500 --> 00:36:24,500
OK.

697
00:36:24,500 --> 00:36:27,020
All right, Rob, we turn to you.

698
00:36:27,020 --> 00:36:28,020
All right.

699
00:36:28,020 --> 00:36:31,500
I was thinking of you on this one.

700
00:36:31,500 --> 00:36:32,500
OK.

701
00:36:32,500 --> 00:36:40,980
Four rock songs with commonly misunderstood meanings.

702
00:36:40,980 --> 00:36:41,980
This is going to be good.

703
00:36:41,980 --> 00:36:45,740
Is this is this American songwriter?

704
00:36:45,740 --> 00:36:48,260
Yes, it is.

705
00:36:48,260 --> 00:36:49,940
You love me, Rob.

706
00:36:49,940 --> 00:36:51,540
Without a doubt, you love me.

707
00:36:51,540 --> 00:36:53,780
Oh, OK.

708
00:36:53,780 --> 00:36:54,780
Got it now.

709
00:36:54,780 --> 00:36:58,780
We'll slow on the ball tonight.

710
00:36:58,780 --> 00:36:59,780
Sorry.

711
00:36:59,780 --> 00:37:00,780
OK.

712
00:37:00,780 --> 00:37:09,140
First up, whether you were around to hear this Bonnie Tyler hit in the 1980s or not,

713
00:37:09,140 --> 00:37:17,420
you're probably at least somewhat familiar with the opening vocals and telltale piano.

714
00:37:17,420 --> 00:37:22,340
Totally clips of the heart is the power ballad of power ballads.

715
00:37:22,340 --> 00:37:25,860
And many simply think it's about lost love.

716
00:37:25,860 --> 00:37:26,860
It definitely is.

717
00:37:26,860 --> 00:37:29,860
But it's also about vampires.

718
00:37:29,860 --> 00:37:30,860
Huh?

719
00:37:30,860 --> 00:37:35,860
That threw me for one.

720
00:37:35,860 --> 00:37:45,220
Songwriter Jim Steinman came to tune for his musical Dance of the Vampires.

721
00:37:45,220 --> 00:37:51,620
Steinman said that the song was intended to be a vampire love song and that the title

722
00:37:51,620 --> 00:37:55,340
was originally Vampires in Love.

723
00:37:55,340 --> 00:38:00,980
The Broadway show was an unfortunate flop, so the song went to Tyler.

724
00:38:00,980 --> 00:38:05,420
To this day, it's still the biggest hit of her career.

725
00:38:05,420 --> 00:38:07,420
Mm hmm.

726
00:38:07,420 --> 00:38:08,420
Huh.

727
00:38:08,420 --> 00:38:09,420
That.

728
00:38:09,420 --> 00:38:16,900
It was meant for a play and it flopped, so they got given to Bonnie Tyler.

729
00:38:16,900 --> 00:38:17,900
OK.

730
00:38:17,900 --> 00:38:20,060
I thought it was just about lost love, like you said.

731
00:38:20,060 --> 00:38:21,060
So anyhow.

732
00:38:21,060 --> 00:38:22,060
Yeah.

733
00:38:22,060 --> 00:38:23,060
Yeah.

734
00:38:23,060 --> 00:38:24,060
Oh, I read.

735
00:38:24,060 --> 00:38:25,060
Yeah, that was the first show I read.

736
00:38:25,060 --> 00:38:26,060
Oh my.

737
00:38:26,060 --> 00:38:27,740
Yeah, I did not know that.

738
00:38:27,740 --> 00:38:31,140
I found that surprising, but anyhow, cool.

739
00:38:31,140 --> 00:38:33,940
Uh, Justin what?

740
00:38:33,940 --> 00:38:38,540
Just like heaven, by the cure.

741
00:38:38,540 --> 00:38:39,540
Oh, OK.

742
00:38:39,540 --> 00:38:44,940
Just like heaven, it's one of the best love songs of all time.

743
00:38:44,940 --> 00:38:51,820
It's loaded with Robert Smith's unique brand of poetic lyricism and the song is about a

744
00:38:51,820 --> 00:38:54,820
little more than just being in love.

745
00:38:54,820 --> 00:39:03,060
According to Smith himself, the song was inspired by a makeout field trip he took with his then

746
00:39:03,060 --> 00:39:07,180
girlfriend, now wife, Harry Poole.

747
00:39:07,180 --> 00:39:15,460
The earworm lyrics, show me, show me, show me how you do that trick, boast a double meaning.

748
00:39:15,460 --> 00:39:23,020
They alluded to Smith's love of performing magic tricks to kids, as well as a seduction

749
00:39:23,020 --> 00:39:25,820
trick as an adult.

750
00:39:25,820 --> 00:39:31,620
We don't need to dig deeper into that.

751
00:39:31,620 --> 00:39:32,620
OK.

752
00:39:32,620 --> 00:39:41,860
Yeah, that one, yeah, it probably could have sounded different for that one, but anyway.

753
00:39:41,860 --> 00:39:45,420
Oh well, you know what, it was OK, so.

754
00:39:45,420 --> 00:39:53,900
OK, then my son, Stan Wilson, once said that he expected the band's big hit, Closing Time,

755
00:39:53,900 --> 00:39:59,060
to become a song used by bartenders around the world.

756
00:39:59,060 --> 00:40:05,620
That being said, the lyrics were actually more about being physically born than they

757
00:40:05,620 --> 00:40:12,780
were about bartenders kicking out their patrons at the end of the night.

758
00:40:12,780 --> 00:40:19,260
My wife and I were expecting our first kid very soon after I wrote that song, Wilson

759
00:40:19,260 --> 00:40:20,260
said.

760
00:40:20,260 --> 00:40:22,900
I had birth on the brink.

761
00:40:22,900 --> 00:40:32,060
I was struck by what a funny pun it was, the bounce from the womb.

762
00:40:32,060 --> 00:40:33,060
OK.

763
00:40:33,060 --> 00:40:35,420
You know that song Closing Time?

764
00:40:35,420 --> 00:40:39,700
Yeah, I've never once heard that at a bar and I've been like ordered to leave many bars

765
00:40:39,700 --> 00:40:42,620
because they were closing.

766
00:40:42,620 --> 00:40:44,100
Have you ever heard that at closing?

767
00:40:44,100 --> 00:40:49,900
Well, you would think that that's what it'd be useful, but yeah, that's not even worth

768
00:40:49,900 --> 00:40:50,900
the song tape.

769
00:40:50,900 --> 00:40:54,540
It would kick out the womb.

770
00:40:54,540 --> 00:40:56,740
OK, all right, that makes more sense.

771
00:40:56,740 --> 00:41:02,380
A lot of people have always figured it was Closing Time at a bar, you know?

772
00:41:02,380 --> 00:41:08,060
All the bars I used to frequent in Westport, they shut off the music and told you to leave.

773
00:41:08,060 --> 00:41:11,660
So you didn't get to hear a leaving song and it used to piss me off because it's always

774
00:41:11,660 --> 00:41:17,100
like we always got to the jukebox that I started controlling, you know, I got through an hour

775
00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:22,380
of the bullshit Madonna or whatever, you know, and then my stuff would come on and all of

776
00:41:22,380 --> 00:41:26,340
a sudden, a half hour later, they cut right off in the middle of Dio and time to go.

777
00:41:26,340 --> 00:41:28,900
And I'm like, oh, man, this sucks.

778
00:41:28,900 --> 00:41:31,900
So yeah, go ahead, Rob.

779
00:41:31,900 --> 00:41:37,020
OK, finally.

780
00:41:37,020 --> 00:41:40,900
American Girl by Tom Petty.

781
00:41:40,900 --> 00:41:41,900
OK.

782
00:41:41,900 --> 00:41:50,820
Everybody knows this hit, 1977 Tom Petty classic, and some conspiracy theorists believe that

783
00:41:50,820 --> 00:41:59,180
the song was secretly inspired by the suicide of a Florida girl.

784
00:41:59,180 --> 00:42:02,180
I've heard that.

785
00:42:02,180 --> 00:42:03,940
I think I have, too.

786
00:42:03,940 --> 00:42:04,940
I was thinking about that.

787
00:42:04,940 --> 00:42:06,940
I think I did hear something about that.

788
00:42:06,940 --> 00:42:07,940
Yeah.

789
00:42:07,940 --> 00:42:16,100
Well, Petty himself put the room at risk in the book Conversations with Tom Petty by saying

790
00:42:16,100 --> 00:42:20,460
it was just not at all true.

791
00:42:20,460 --> 00:42:28,540
The Heartbreakers guitarist Mike Campbell also noted that the song is simply just a

792
00:42:28,540 --> 00:42:31,540
really beautiful love song.

793
00:42:31,540 --> 00:42:35,140
OK, that could make sense.

794
00:42:35,140 --> 00:42:36,140
Yeah.

795
00:42:36,140 --> 00:42:37,140
OK.

796
00:42:37,140 --> 00:42:38,140
I don't know.

797
00:42:38,140 --> 00:42:39,140
There was no conspiracy about that song.

798
00:42:39,140 --> 00:42:40,140
It's just a really beautiful love song.

799
00:42:40,140 --> 00:42:41,140
I never knew that.

800
00:42:41,140 --> 00:42:42,140
Now I do.

801
00:42:42,140 --> 00:42:53,140
Now I know American Girl could have meant something else, but I guess it didn't.

802
00:42:53,140 --> 00:42:56,020
I'll have to look up that because I forgot.

803
00:42:56,020 --> 00:42:58,900
I remember hearing something about that, too.

804
00:42:58,900 --> 00:43:00,900
And I think I did, too.

805
00:43:00,900 --> 00:43:03,660
Yeah, I think I kind of believed it there for a while.

806
00:43:03,660 --> 00:43:08,300
So anyhow, we have some mass paddling, so you want to get to some mass paddling after

807
00:43:08,300 --> 00:43:09,300
the break?

808
00:43:09,300 --> 00:43:10,300
Yeah, sounds good.

809
00:43:10,300 --> 00:43:11,300
Yeah, I mean, there's just.

810
00:43:11,300 --> 00:43:12,300
I don't have enough energy.

811
00:43:12,300 --> 00:43:19,860
Well, the good thing is we don't have to paddle them right now.

812
00:43:19,860 --> 00:43:21,540
We're just deciding to paddle them.

813
00:43:21,540 --> 00:43:24,380
So we'll get to paddle them later when you have more energy.

814
00:43:24,380 --> 00:43:35,220
So all right, we'll be right back in a minute.

815
00:43:35,220 --> 00:43:36,220
Hey there, fuckstick.

816
00:43:36,220 --> 00:43:41,700
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.

817
00:43:41,700 --> 00:43:48,940
A store in Amsterdam has a glass blowing kit for people that want to make their own bones.

818
00:43:48,940 --> 00:43:54,740
The apocalypse just happened.

819
00:43:54,740 --> 00:43:58,740
You don't know what to do.

820
00:43:58,740 --> 00:44:01,740
You don't know where to go.

821
00:44:01,740 --> 00:44:02,740
But we can tell you what you can eat.

822
00:44:02,740 --> 00:44:03,740
Hi all.

823
00:44:03,740 --> 00:44:04,740
This is Mark here.

824
00:44:04,740 --> 00:44:08,460
I'm usually the one telling you what to eat during an apocalypse.

825
00:44:08,460 --> 00:44:12,020
Well, this time I decided to go the other way.

826
00:44:12,020 --> 00:44:15,860
You ever consider just going to ground zero and saying fuck it?

827
00:44:15,860 --> 00:44:20,820
Do you really want to be the guy running around looking for radioactive deer, guessing whether

828
00:44:20,820 --> 00:44:23,100
water is not contaminated or not?

829
00:44:23,100 --> 00:44:24,980
No food, no shelter, no nothing.

830
00:44:24,980 --> 00:44:30,140
Oh no, there's a strong argument that says, you know what, let's just go to ground zero

831
00:44:30,140 --> 00:44:32,780
and see what's for us after.

832
00:44:32,780 --> 00:44:33,780
Just a thought.

833
00:44:33,780 --> 00:44:34,780
Have you ever wondered where something came about?

834
00:44:34,780 --> 00:44:41,780
Have you ever looked at something and said, I wonder what the origin of that is?

835
00:44:41,780 --> 00:44:42,780
Well, so have we.

836
00:44:42,780 --> 00:44:46,980
That's why we give you the origin of.

837
00:44:46,980 --> 00:44:48,780
This is the origin of the Big Mac.

838
00:44:48,780 --> 00:44:54,020
The original Big Mac sauce was created in 1968 at a McDonald's in Pittsburgh by a franchise

839
00:44:54,020 --> 00:44:59,260
owner named Jim Delegati to serve with the Big Mac itself.

840
00:44:59,260 --> 00:45:03,480
The sauce first came in two different flavors, but then they were ultimately combined by

841
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:13,180
McDonald's head honcho Ray Kroc in 1972 in order to ensure consistency.

842
00:45:13,180 --> 00:45:16,180
Hello, this is Satan.

843
00:45:16,180 --> 00:45:21,180
You might know me from my pet name, Inflation.

844
00:45:21,180 --> 00:45:27,180
I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than listening to two douchebags

845
00:45:27,180 --> 00:45:31,180
and microphone by a nice warm fire at night.

846
00:45:31,180 --> 00:45:36,180
I sit there and I reflect on all the souls I burned that day.

847
00:45:36,180 --> 00:45:37,180
Enjoy.

848
00:45:37,180 --> 00:45:40,180
Next up, Things Overheard in Hell.

849
00:45:40,180 --> 00:46:02,980
Oh wow, look, the Wayne Newton Channel was the highest rated network.

850
00:46:02,980 --> 00:46:05,180
Two douchebags and microphone on Mark.

851
00:46:05,180 --> 00:46:08,860
And I am Rob.

852
00:46:08,860 --> 00:46:10,860
Did you guys get very much rain there today?

853
00:46:10,860 --> 00:46:25,180
Well, it started about 830 this morning and it rained pretty good up till about noon and

854
00:46:25,180 --> 00:46:29,380
then it rained a little bit again between 330 and 4.

855
00:46:29,380 --> 00:46:30,380
Oh, okay.

856
00:46:30,380 --> 00:46:31,380
Okay.

857
00:46:31,380 --> 00:46:33,380
It came down pretty good.

858
00:46:33,380 --> 00:46:34,380
Okay.

859
00:46:34,380 --> 00:46:38,380
Ours came in about, I don't know, seven or eight in the morning and probably, I don't

860
00:46:38,380 --> 00:46:39,860
know, lasted a couple of hours.

861
00:46:39,860 --> 00:46:42,300
Some places got a lot and some places got none.

862
00:46:42,300 --> 00:46:44,100
I was just wondering.

863
00:46:44,100 --> 00:46:45,100
Okay.

864
00:46:45,100 --> 00:46:50,420
Anyhow, I have some ass paddlings, Rob, and they all deserve it.

865
00:46:50,420 --> 00:46:55,820
So once again, we go into this for the newer people that may not know how this originated.

866
00:46:55,820 --> 00:47:01,540
So these are invisible ass paddlings because myself and Rob are invisible, but it started

867
00:47:01,540 --> 00:47:03,580
with me and Topher, the first co-host.

868
00:47:03,580 --> 00:47:04,580
Okay.

869
00:47:04,580 --> 00:47:07,380
So Topher and I was walking along on a beach.

870
00:47:07,380 --> 00:47:10,860
We're on vacation and our toes in the sand.

871
00:47:10,860 --> 00:47:17,140
The sun was coming up and our hair was being blown back lightly by a light gentle wind.

872
00:47:17,140 --> 00:47:21,740
And we're walking along talking, but we were not holding hands like Rob and his brother

873
00:47:21,740 --> 00:47:22,900
keep insisting.

874
00:47:22,900 --> 00:47:23,900
We were not.

875
00:47:23,900 --> 00:47:24,900
Two men can have- Hey, hey, hey.

876
00:47:24,900 --> 00:47:25,900
Don't argue with the Duke.

877
00:47:25,900 --> 00:47:29,580
Don't argue with the Duke.

878
00:47:29,580 --> 00:47:33,260
Two men can have a tender moment without it going that far.

879
00:47:33,260 --> 00:47:40,660
So we're walking along and suddenly I stubbed my toe and I'm like, oh shit.

880
00:47:40,660 --> 00:47:45,340
I look down and then Topher looks over and goes, dude, that looks like a genie's bottle.

881
00:47:45,340 --> 00:47:47,100
I'm like, no fucking way, man.

882
00:47:47,100 --> 00:47:49,860
It's just like it's a night train bottle or something.

883
00:47:49,860 --> 00:47:51,660
Walk over there and there's a cork in it.

884
00:47:51,660 --> 00:47:54,020
I'm like, wow, dude, this looks like a genie bottle.

885
00:47:54,020 --> 00:47:55,940
He goes, oh, no shit.

886
00:47:55,940 --> 00:47:57,540
So I popped the cork.

887
00:47:57,540 --> 00:47:58,740
Out comes a genie.

888
00:47:58,740 --> 00:48:00,820
He was a really condescending genie.

889
00:48:00,820 --> 00:48:06,020
He could not stand us, you could tell, but anyhow, Topher and I are like, hey, hey, we

890
00:48:06,020 --> 00:48:08,060
get three wishes and he rolls his eyes.

891
00:48:08,060 --> 00:48:12,180
He goes, no, you guys watch way too much TV and he's rolling his eyes at us.

892
00:48:12,180 --> 00:48:15,340
He couldn't stand us, but he had to grant us a wish.

893
00:48:15,340 --> 00:48:18,380
He said, you get one wish, one wish only.

894
00:48:18,380 --> 00:48:23,420
So far you guys, I would think wisely about the wish I pick.

895
00:48:23,420 --> 00:48:29,500
World peace, environmental stuff, save the will, something.

896
00:48:29,500 --> 00:48:31,340
Save the icebergs.

897
00:48:31,340 --> 00:48:33,700
And Topher and I looked at each other and then we went to the genie.

898
00:48:33,700 --> 00:48:38,340
We won't be invisible so we can paddle people's asses without them seeing us.

899
00:48:38,340 --> 00:48:40,020
The genie sighed.

900
00:48:40,020 --> 00:48:43,160
He rolled his eyes and he goes, very well.

901
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:50,000
So once a month we are granted special permission by this genie to turn invisible and paddle

902
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:51,420
people's asses.

903
00:48:51,420 --> 00:48:57,860
The paddle is fantastic because it's a replica of old Sparky that was used at Cast Midway

904
00:48:57,860 --> 00:49:02,100
to correct us evildoers in school.

905
00:49:02,100 --> 00:49:07,620
And there were quite a few times I felt the power from old Sparky.

906
00:49:07,620 --> 00:49:15,420
Last I knew old Sparky was retired and hanging up in the trophy case next to our state championship

907
00:49:15,420 --> 00:49:19,340
cups that are in there or whatever, whatever you want to call it.

908
00:49:19,340 --> 00:49:25,100
So anyhow, this is a replica of old Sparky and old Sparky had holes in him.

909
00:49:25,100 --> 00:49:30,500
It was a long gated piece of, I don't know, probably hedge.

910
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:31,580
It was such hardwood.

911
00:49:31,580 --> 00:49:32,860
It was horrible.

912
00:49:32,860 --> 00:49:39,940
So anyhow, that long paddle to ensure extra extra might when it impressed upon your bottom.

913
00:49:39,940 --> 00:49:43,740
So that is what we're using and it's not nice.

914
00:49:43,740 --> 00:49:50,180
So anyhow, okay, the first one on our list to get an invisible ass paddling is of course,

915
00:49:50,180 --> 00:49:52,300
it's got to be the Trump shooter.

916
00:49:52,300 --> 00:49:53,300
Okay.

917
00:49:53,300 --> 00:49:58,860
I mean, you take and try to kill somebody and a former president, someone running for

918
00:49:58,860 --> 00:50:02,020
it again, you know, anybody.

919
00:50:02,020 --> 00:50:04,780
You need a nice ass paddling, but he's dead.

920
00:50:04,780 --> 00:50:07,060
So how you want to handle that, Rob?

921
00:50:07,060 --> 00:50:12,060
Do we like grab him out of the casket and spank him or what?

922
00:50:12,060 --> 00:50:27,420
I kind of want to since he was such a disrespectful little shit.

923
00:50:27,420 --> 00:50:28,420
Yeah.

924
00:50:28,420 --> 00:50:31,420
I don't know if we could morally get away with it.

925
00:50:31,420 --> 00:50:32,420
Maybe we could sneak into the.

926
00:50:32,420 --> 00:50:34,820
No, they wouldn't even know it was us.

927
00:50:34,820 --> 00:50:35,820
That's right.

928
00:50:35,820 --> 00:50:36,820
We're invisible.

929
00:50:36,820 --> 00:50:37,820
Yeah.

930
00:50:37,820 --> 00:50:38,820
Okay.

931
00:50:38,820 --> 00:50:40,660
Let's sneak into the cold room.

932
00:50:40,660 --> 00:50:43,340
They could sneak in there at night.

933
00:50:43,340 --> 00:50:46,900
Game on in the casket when nobody's around.

934
00:50:46,900 --> 00:50:47,900
That's what we'll do.

935
00:50:47,900 --> 00:50:52,100
Hey, but we got to do it before they bury.

936
00:50:52,100 --> 00:50:53,100
Yes.

937
00:50:53,100 --> 00:50:56,660
And let's switch them around to where his ass is showing instead of his face.

938
00:50:56,660 --> 00:50:58,660
Of course.

939
00:50:58,660 --> 00:50:59,660
Yes.

940
00:50:59,660 --> 00:51:01,900
All right.

941
00:51:01,900 --> 00:51:06,740
The next one that gets an ass paddling is Jerry Rice.

942
00:51:06,740 --> 00:51:13,260
Sorry, Jerry, but you'd be a dick to a chief's reporter and threaten him and all that.

943
00:51:13,260 --> 00:51:15,100
You get an ass paddling.

944
00:51:15,100 --> 00:51:16,980
And I'm thinking maybe bare bottom.

945
00:51:16,980 --> 00:51:17,980
What do you think?

946
00:51:17,980 --> 00:51:21,660
You think it constitutes a bare bottom or you just want to give him a regular ass?

947
00:51:21,660 --> 00:51:24,420
Let's give a regular just a regular ass paddling.

948
00:51:24,420 --> 00:51:27,100
If he if he spouts off any more, then he'll get a bare bottom.

949
00:51:27,100 --> 00:51:28,100
Right.

950
00:51:28,100 --> 00:51:30,780
We're just going to give him a regular one with the threat of a bare bottom.

951
00:51:30,780 --> 00:51:33,220
If anything happens again, that's that's good.

952
00:51:33,220 --> 00:51:35,220
We'll use it as a threat.

953
00:51:35,220 --> 00:51:40,620
But we're going to have to bring Topher to help hold him.

954
00:51:40,620 --> 00:51:41,620
Oh, yeah.

955
00:51:41,620 --> 00:51:42,620
Yeah.

956
00:51:42,620 --> 00:51:43,860
Topher is always on board with that.

957
00:51:43,860 --> 00:51:44,860
Yeah.

958
00:51:44,860 --> 00:51:45,860
Oh, yeah.

959
00:51:45,860 --> 00:51:46,860
That won't be that won't be a problem.

960
00:51:46,860 --> 00:51:48,460
He'll be the first in line to paddle him.

961
00:51:48,460 --> 00:51:49,460
So OK.

962
00:51:49,460 --> 00:51:50,460
All right.

963
00:51:50,460 --> 00:51:53,980
Next, the Paris River Shitters.

964
00:51:53,980 --> 00:51:58,260
You know, those activists that all threatened to take down take dumps in the river, the

965
00:51:58,260 --> 00:51:59,980
Paris River.

966
00:51:59,980 --> 00:52:01,180
They all get ass paddlies.

967
00:52:01,180 --> 00:52:02,780
But after they wipe.

968
00:52:02,780 --> 00:52:03,780
Agreed.

969
00:52:03,780 --> 00:52:04,780
Yeah.

970
00:52:04,780 --> 00:52:08,300
We're going to go ahead and let them wipe first and then we'll paddle their asses.

971
00:52:08,300 --> 00:52:09,300
No, no, no, no.

972
00:52:09,300 --> 00:52:11,940
We'll get it coming out of the shower.

973
00:52:11,940 --> 00:52:12,940
That's it.

974
00:52:12,940 --> 00:52:13,940
OK.

975
00:52:13,940 --> 00:52:14,940
After the shower.

976
00:52:14,940 --> 00:52:16,220
That way we know they're clean.

977
00:52:16,220 --> 00:52:17,220
That's good.

978
00:52:17,220 --> 00:52:18,220
OK.

979
00:52:18,220 --> 00:52:19,220
I like that idea.

980
00:52:19,220 --> 00:52:20,220
Thank you, Rob.

981
00:52:20,220 --> 00:52:21,220
And then next, the front.

982
00:52:21,220 --> 00:52:22,220
Hey, and then we got bare ass.

983
00:52:22,220 --> 00:52:23,220
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

984
00:52:23,220 --> 00:52:24,220
That's right.

985
00:52:24,220 --> 00:52:25,220
Yeah.

986
00:52:25,220 --> 00:52:26,220
And it's by default.

987
00:52:26,220 --> 00:52:27,220
We didn't even have to call it.

988
00:52:27,220 --> 00:52:28,220
I mean, they're all coming out of their bare ass.

989
00:52:28,220 --> 00:52:29,220
So we have no choice.

990
00:52:29,220 --> 00:52:30,220
All right.

991
00:52:30,220 --> 00:52:35,220
Rob, great work.

992
00:52:35,220 --> 00:52:36,220
Great work.

993
00:52:36,220 --> 00:52:37,220
Great thinking.

994
00:52:37,220 --> 00:52:44,220
So then next, the French prime minister for lying allegedly.

995
00:52:44,220 --> 00:52:50,220
And leading to this infestation of stink bricks in the Paris River.

996
00:52:50,220 --> 00:52:51,220
Agreed.

997
00:52:51,220 --> 00:52:52,220
Agreed.

998
00:52:52,220 --> 00:52:55,220
All right.

999
00:52:55,220 --> 00:53:01,060
I think we want to keep her clothing on.

1000
00:53:01,060 --> 00:53:02,060
No bare ass.

1001
00:53:02,060 --> 00:53:03,060
Right, right, right.

1002
00:53:03,060 --> 00:53:04,060
Yeah, yeah.

1003
00:53:04,060 --> 00:53:07,580
I think that's what needs to happen.

1004
00:53:07,580 --> 00:53:13,260
The next one on our target list is meta for getting rid of the search bar on Facebook

1005
00:53:13,260 --> 00:53:17,220
and putting in a message to AI.

1006
00:53:17,220 --> 00:53:18,220
Yes.

1007
00:53:18,220 --> 00:53:19,220
That's bullshit.

1008
00:53:19,220 --> 00:53:21,100
Damn, that damn thing.

1009
00:53:21,100 --> 00:53:26,340
I try to look somebody up to see what they're doing or say happy birthday or something.

1010
00:53:26,340 --> 00:53:29,860
It takes me a stupid chat bot and I don't want anything to do with that bastard.

1011
00:53:29,860 --> 00:53:31,820
No, I don't either.

1012
00:53:31,820 --> 00:53:32,820
Yeah.

1013
00:53:32,820 --> 00:53:36,020
Well, you can't do it anymore because you go up there and it's like, oh, I'm the chat

1014
00:53:36,020 --> 00:53:37,020
bot.

1015
00:53:37,020 --> 00:53:38,020
How can I help you?

1016
00:53:38,020 --> 00:53:39,020
I'm like, no, you can't help me.

1017
00:53:39,020 --> 00:53:40,020
So get the fuck off of here.

1018
00:53:40,020 --> 00:53:41,020
You can help me.

1019
00:53:41,020 --> 00:53:42,020
Give me my personal look.

1020
00:53:42,020 --> 00:53:43,020
Personal message.

1021
00:53:43,020 --> 00:53:44,020
Yeah.

1022
00:53:44,020 --> 00:53:47,260
No, don't want that.

1023
00:53:47,260 --> 00:53:51,500
So meta and Zuckerberg's in the hall of fame.

1024
00:53:51,500 --> 00:53:54,300
I mean, I guess we could pull him out too and give him a paddling.

1025
00:53:54,300 --> 00:53:55,300
What do you think?

1026
00:53:55,300 --> 00:53:57,300
It's his company.

1027
00:53:57,300 --> 00:53:58,300
Okay.

1028
00:53:58,300 --> 00:54:04,820
He gets a paddling and then meta itself, the parent company, which he owns, they also get

1029
00:54:04,820 --> 00:54:05,820
an ass paddling.

1030
00:54:05,820 --> 00:54:07,620
However, we do that.

1031
00:54:07,620 --> 00:54:08,620
Okay.

1032
00:54:08,620 --> 00:54:09,620
Right.

1033
00:54:09,620 --> 00:54:10,620
Okay.

1034
00:54:10,620 --> 00:54:19,220
So the next one is Florida gets an ass paddling over the new report on minimum wage.

1035
00:54:19,220 --> 00:54:21,700
About how minimum wage there you would have to work what?

1036
00:54:21,700 --> 00:54:25,780
I mean, 200 hours a week to afford a place to live.

1037
00:54:25,780 --> 00:54:27,620
Something like that.

1038
00:54:27,620 --> 00:54:28,620
Yeah.

1039
00:54:28,620 --> 00:54:32,620
If you're making minimum wage, that's what you have to do to make a living there.

1040
00:54:32,620 --> 00:54:36,920
So Florida gets an ass paddling just for that.

1041
00:54:36,920 --> 00:54:38,620
So agreed.

1042
00:54:38,620 --> 00:54:40,100
Agreed.

1043
00:54:40,100 --> 00:54:43,140
I don't know how we'd bear ass Florida's.

1044
00:54:43,140 --> 00:54:44,340
Let's just keep it a regular one.

1045
00:54:44,340 --> 00:54:45,340
Does that sound okay?

1046
00:54:45,340 --> 00:54:46,340
Yeah, that's good.

1047
00:54:46,340 --> 00:54:48,340
Yeah, that's good.

1048
00:54:48,340 --> 00:54:49,860
Okay.

1049
00:54:49,860 --> 00:54:56,540
John Deere gets a hall of fame and shame bare ass paddling for bailing Iowa and going to

1050
00:54:56,540 --> 00:54:58,020
Mexico.

1051
00:54:58,020 --> 00:55:03,180
They share, they're in the, they're in the front of the hall of fame.

1052
00:55:03,180 --> 00:55:05,420
There were the Charles Mansons and people like that.

1053
00:55:05,420 --> 00:55:07,620
They are right there.

1054
00:55:07,620 --> 00:55:14,260
And it's bare assed and I think like we should consider like maybe a weekly ass paddling.

1055
00:55:14,260 --> 00:55:17,300
What do you think?

1056
00:55:17,300 --> 00:55:21,140
Our arms are going to get wore out.

1057
00:55:21,140 --> 00:55:22,140
Okay.

1058
00:55:22,140 --> 00:55:24,780
We'll keep it, we'll keep it to once a month or a little bit sooner than a month.

1059
00:55:24,780 --> 00:55:25,780
We'll keep it right there.

1060
00:55:25,780 --> 00:55:26,780
But yeah, yeah.

1061
00:55:26,780 --> 00:55:27,780
I, John Deere, I can't.

1062
00:55:27,780 --> 00:55:32,780
Once a week, that's a lot of ass to paddle.

1063
00:55:32,780 --> 00:55:33,780
Yeah.

1064
00:55:33,780 --> 00:55:34,780
You know what?

1065
00:55:34,780 --> 00:55:37,120
You and I are going to have to switch off because I'm going to throw all my might into

1066
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:38,420
John Deere ass paddling.

1067
00:55:38,420 --> 00:55:39,420
What about you?

1068
00:55:39,420 --> 00:55:40,420
Yeah.

1069
00:55:40,420 --> 00:55:41,420
Yeah.

1070
00:55:41,420 --> 00:55:42,420
Oh yeah.

1071
00:55:42,420 --> 00:55:44,860
We're going to make them pay for what they did.

1072
00:55:44,860 --> 00:55:45,860
Allegedly.

1073
00:55:45,860 --> 00:55:52,060
Um, Edward King, the online gamer that flew from North East, from the Northeast to Florida

1074
00:55:52,060 --> 00:55:56,860
to try to kill another online gamer because he kept kicking his ass online.

1075
00:55:56,860 --> 00:55:57,860
Yeah.

1076
00:55:57,860 --> 00:55:58,860
Yeah.

1077
00:55:58,860 --> 00:55:59,860
Yeah.

1078
00:55:59,860 --> 00:56:02,580
That guy gets one hell of an ass paddling.

1079
00:56:02,580 --> 00:56:05,460
And remember I already had him down, but you called it.

1080
00:56:05,460 --> 00:56:06,460
Yeah.

1081
00:56:06,460 --> 00:56:07,460
Yeah.

1082
00:56:07,460 --> 00:56:08,460
Yeah.

1083
00:56:08,460 --> 00:56:09,460
You're like ass paddling.

1084
00:56:09,460 --> 00:56:10,460
I'm like too late.

1085
00:56:10,460 --> 00:56:11,460
I already got him on there.

1086
00:56:11,460 --> 00:56:12,460
Yeah.

1087
00:56:12,460 --> 00:56:16,900
As soon as I read that story, I'm like, he's getting it right there.

1088
00:56:16,900 --> 00:56:17,900
So yeah.

1089
00:56:17,900 --> 00:56:18,900
Yep.

1090
00:56:18,900 --> 00:56:25,260
So Edward King, you're getting an ass paddling and I'm glad you didn't get to kill that guy.

1091
00:56:25,260 --> 00:56:29,400
So anyhow, unless he's a tool bag, then you know, but anyhow, we don't know that.

1092
00:56:29,400 --> 00:56:38,820
So anyhow, Zach Wilson, because his dating life has taken the heat off Aaron Rogers.

1093
00:56:38,820 --> 00:56:41,380
Don't you think that deserves an ass paddling?

1094
00:56:41,380 --> 00:56:42,980
Yeah.

1095
00:56:42,980 --> 00:56:48,740
Even though I support Zach Wilson on his, uh, milf hunting, he did very well on that.

1096
00:56:48,740 --> 00:56:49,740
Very well.

1097
00:56:49,740 --> 00:56:52,100
You can look and see the pictures yourself.

1098
00:56:52,100 --> 00:56:54,620
I commend him on the milf catching.

1099
00:56:54,620 --> 00:56:56,100
He did great.

1100
00:56:56,100 --> 00:57:02,000
But the fact that his milf catching took president over Aaron Rogers, shenanigans and stupidity

1101
00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:03,460
hurts me deeply.

1102
00:57:03,460 --> 00:57:05,200
So I think he needs an ass paddling.

1103
00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:08,200
What do you think, Rob?

1104
00:57:08,200 --> 00:57:09,700
I agree.

1105
00:57:09,700 --> 00:57:10,700
Okay.

1106
00:57:10,700 --> 00:57:11,700
All right.

1107
00:57:11,700 --> 00:57:12,700
Zach Wilson gets an ass paddling.

1108
00:57:12,700 --> 00:57:15,180
Hey, do you want to paddle Aaron Rogers too?

1109
00:57:15,180 --> 00:57:17,180
Just cause I brought up his name.

1110
00:57:17,180 --> 00:57:19,780
Yeah, why not?

1111
00:57:19,780 --> 00:57:20,780
Okay.

1112
00:57:20,780 --> 00:57:23,420
Zach Wilson and Aaron Rogers getting ass paddling together.

1113
00:57:23,420 --> 00:57:24,420
How's that?

1114
00:57:24,420 --> 00:57:25,420
Yeah.

1115
00:57:25,420 --> 00:57:26,420
I'll give Aaron Rogers one of these.

1116
00:57:26,420 --> 00:57:27,420
That's skip last year.

1117
00:57:27,420 --> 00:57:28,420
I know he had injury and all, but you know.

1118
00:57:28,420 --> 00:57:29,420
Yeah.

1119
00:57:29,420 --> 00:57:30,420
Yeah.

1120
00:57:30,420 --> 00:57:31,420
You know what?

1121
00:57:31,420 --> 00:57:32,420
You're right.

1122
00:57:32,420 --> 00:57:33,420
He deserves.

1123
00:57:33,420 --> 00:57:38,420
He was mowing off before season.

1124
00:57:38,420 --> 00:57:39,420
Yes.

1125
00:57:39,420 --> 00:57:43,140
I agree with that 100% Rob.

1126
00:57:43,140 --> 00:57:44,140
Okay.

1127
00:57:44,140 --> 00:57:47,460
A-Raj gets an ass paddling too and it's long overdue.

1128
00:57:47,460 --> 00:57:52,580
So next one is skipping Joplin.

1129
00:57:52,580 --> 00:57:57,660
Not because he sent me that bullshit letter, but only because he is too chicken shit to

1130
00:57:57,660 --> 00:58:03,100
do a podcast to prove how good he is.

1131
00:58:03,100 --> 00:58:07,020
Nothing crickets crickets from him.

1132
00:58:07,020 --> 00:58:11,500
Like I thought keyboard tough guy.

1133
00:58:11,500 --> 00:58:14,300
So anyhow, I sent him three or four messages back.

1134
00:58:14,300 --> 00:58:16,780
I'm certain he got one of them.

1135
00:58:16,780 --> 00:58:20,300
So anyhow, skip your little bitch.

1136
00:58:20,300 --> 00:58:22,100
You're our bitch.

1137
00:58:22,100 --> 00:58:24,780
You are our bitch skip.

1138
00:58:24,780 --> 00:58:25,900
Congratulations.

1139
00:58:25,900 --> 00:58:31,420
So and you also get an ass paddling next.

1140
00:58:31,420 --> 00:58:35,780
The Nathan hot dog cheater, Nick Wirie.

1141
00:58:35,780 --> 00:58:40,220
Why the fuck agreed?

1142
00:58:40,220 --> 00:58:43,700
No reason.

1143
00:58:43,700 --> 00:58:45,480
You weren't going to be, you weren't number one.

1144
00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:50,140
You're like number seven when you cheated.

1145
00:58:50,140 --> 00:58:51,940
If you're going for number one, I could see it.

1146
00:58:51,940 --> 00:58:53,860
I wouldn't condone it, but I would see it.

1147
00:58:53,860 --> 00:58:57,180
I'd be like, okay, you know, that's a million dollars or whatever.

1148
00:58:57,180 --> 00:58:58,180
Okay.

1149
00:58:58,180 --> 00:59:00,500
But number seven got a pat on the.

1150
00:59:00,500 --> 00:59:04,180
Hell, even the top five.

1151
00:59:04,180 --> 00:59:06,220
Yeah.

1152
00:59:06,220 --> 00:59:07,220
Even the top five.

1153
00:59:07,220 --> 00:59:08,260
You're right.

1154
00:59:08,260 --> 00:59:09,260
Even the top five.

1155
00:59:09,260 --> 00:59:11,460
It could have been like, okay, he wanted to be in the upper echelon.

1156
00:59:11,460 --> 00:59:12,460
We get it.

1157
00:59:12,460 --> 00:59:16,260
But number seven is mediocre and he cheated to do that.

1158
00:59:16,260 --> 00:59:17,260
So allegedly.

1159
00:59:17,260 --> 00:59:18,260
Yeah.

1160
00:59:18,260 --> 00:59:21,420
I'm still scratching my head over that.

1161
00:59:21,420 --> 00:59:23,780
It's like white.

1162
00:59:23,780 --> 00:59:24,780
So anyhow, any.

1163
00:59:24,780 --> 00:59:31,620
Well, I think his wife won the women's competition.

1164
00:59:31,620 --> 00:59:34,940
Oh, you think he felt insecure?

1165
00:59:34,940 --> 00:59:35,940
Something like that.

1166
00:59:35,940 --> 00:59:36,940
Yeah, something like that.

1167
00:59:36,940 --> 00:59:37,940
His wife was in the women's.

1168
00:59:37,940 --> 00:59:46,100
Yeah, she was, I think she won it or she was in like the top three or something.

1169
00:59:46,100 --> 00:59:47,100
You know what, Rob?

1170
00:59:47,100 --> 00:59:48,660
He felt insecure.

1171
00:59:48,660 --> 00:59:49,660
He was like, oh my gosh.

1172
00:59:49,660 --> 00:59:50,660
Yeah.

1173
00:59:50,660 --> 00:59:51,660
Yeah.

1174
00:59:51,660 --> 00:59:54,620
He's like, he got small dicks in there.

1175
00:59:54,620 --> 00:59:55,620
Oh yeah.

1176
00:59:55,620 --> 00:59:56,620
Yeah.

1177
00:59:56,620 --> 01:00:00,380
He's like, man, my wife can eat the wieners, but I can't eat nearly as many years as my

1178
01:00:00,380 --> 01:00:01,380
wife.

1179
01:00:01,380 --> 01:00:08,580
So anyhow, you get an ass paddling that quiet.

1180
01:00:08,580 --> 01:00:14,740
And finally, I'm done with the ass paddlers, but I got one thought for everybody here real

1181
01:00:14,740 --> 01:00:15,740
quick.

1182
01:00:15,740 --> 01:00:24,500
In 2023 years, in 2023 years, 2023 years, it will be either good or bad.

1183
01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:27,820
It will be 50 50.

1184
01:00:27,820 --> 01:00:30,820
Do the math.

1185
01:00:30,820 --> 01:00:39,660
Anyway, Rob, we turn to you to turn this program back on its right side.

1186
01:00:39,660 --> 01:00:41,300
I don't know if I could do that.

1187
01:00:41,300 --> 01:00:44,340
I think it's destroyed for today, but just do what you can.

1188
01:00:44,340 --> 01:00:47,340
Oh, hey, hey, here we go.

1189
01:00:47,340 --> 01:00:48,340
Okay.

1190
01:00:48,340 --> 01:00:49,340
Okay.

1191
01:00:49,340 --> 01:00:50,340
Everybody's happy now.

1192
01:00:50,340 --> 01:00:51,340
All right, Rob, go ahead.

1193
01:00:51,340 --> 01:00:52,340
Okay.

1194
01:00:52,340 --> 01:01:05,340
Many try to find reasons to skip work for a day or two, but rarely get away with it.

1195
01:01:05,340 --> 01:01:13,540
One man stunned people by not turning up for work for at least six years.

1196
01:01:13,540 --> 01:01:21,420
No one knew about it until he was due to be awarded for 20 years of loyalty and dedicated

1197
01:01:21,420 --> 01:01:24,300
service.

1198
01:01:24,300 --> 01:01:32,420
The incident that came to light in 2010 involves a man named Joaquin Garcia, a 69 year old

1199
01:01:32,420 --> 01:01:37,460
engineer in Spain who was working for the local government.

1200
01:01:37,460 --> 01:01:47,980
He started working in the southern western city of Cadiz in 1990 and in 1996 he posted

1201
01:01:47,980 --> 01:01:55,180
to the municipal water board where his work was to supervise the wastewater treatment

1202
01:01:55,180 --> 01:01:56,180
plant.

1203
01:01:56,180 --> 01:02:04,260
Garcia's assets slipped through the crash due to a classic case of miscommunication.

1204
01:02:04,260 --> 01:02:10,660
The water company believed the city council was supposed to be in charge of his work and

1205
01:02:10,660 --> 01:02:16,460
the city council thought that the water company would oversee his work.

1206
01:02:16,460 --> 01:02:26,420
In 2010, the deputy mayor who had hired him started looking for him and it was due to

1207
01:02:26,420 --> 01:02:28,420
collect his wrong service medal.

1208
01:02:28,420 --> 01:02:35,980
Fernandez knew that Garcia was still on the payroll.

1209
01:02:35,980 --> 01:02:38,180
I thought where is this man?

1210
01:02:38,180 --> 01:02:40,180
Is he still there?

1211
01:02:40,180 --> 01:02:42,180
Has he retired?

1212
01:02:42,180 --> 01:02:44,700
Has he died?

1213
01:02:44,700 --> 01:02:52,060
The former manager of the wastewater board who had his office opposite of Garcia's told

1214
01:02:52,060 --> 01:02:57,500
Fernandez that he hadn't seen him for many years.

1215
01:02:57,500 --> 01:03:02,940
This is when the deputy mayor decided to call him up to check what was happening.

1216
01:03:02,940 --> 01:03:07,860
Fernandez shared, I asked him, what are you doing?

1217
01:03:07,860 --> 01:03:10,380
What did you do yesterday?

1218
01:03:10,380 --> 01:03:13,860
And the previous month he could not answer.

1219
01:03:13,860 --> 01:03:21,380
A legal case was filed against the employee for not doing a day's work since 2004.

1220
01:03:21,380 --> 01:03:30,300
Garcia denied the allegation that he had come to work every day, although not during business

1221
01:03:30,300 --> 01:03:31,300
working hours.

1222
01:03:31,300 --> 01:03:39,460
He had that he was a victim of workplace bullying because of his family's social politics and

1223
01:03:39,460 --> 01:03:42,780
had been sidelined at the water board because of that.

1224
01:03:42,780 --> 01:03:56,540
He was being paid a salary of $40,000 a year, the court fined him $29,341, whatever.

1225
01:03:56,540 --> 01:04:03,340
The court found out that Garcia had not occupied his office for at least six years and had

1226
01:04:03,340 --> 01:04:10,260
done absolutely no work between 2007 and 2010.

1227
01:04:10,260 --> 01:04:22,060
This 69-year-old was not fired from his job as he had over-retired in 2011.

1228
01:04:22,060 --> 01:04:24,620
And they were giving him a paycheck the whole time.

1229
01:04:24,620 --> 01:04:26,620
Yeah, yeah.

1230
01:04:26,620 --> 01:04:27,620
Wow.

1231
01:04:27,620 --> 01:04:28,620
Six years.

1232
01:04:28,620 --> 01:04:34,860
It wasn't even there.

1233
01:04:34,860 --> 01:04:38,580
I think that's brilliant.

1234
01:04:38,580 --> 01:04:40,580
It's fine.

1235
01:04:40,580 --> 01:04:45,260
It's less than a year's pay.

1236
01:04:45,260 --> 01:04:46,260
I know.

1237
01:04:46,260 --> 01:04:47,500
He got a...

1238
01:04:47,500 --> 01:04:52,260
There must be something there that they can't really sue him because of some reason.

1239
01:04:52,260 --> 01:04:53,260
You know what I mean?

1240
01:04:53,260 --> 01:04:57,660
There's got to be some legality, otherwise I bet you they would sue him.

1241
01:04:57,660 --> 01:05:01,220
Probably the fact that they didn't catch it and they let him keep...

1242
01:05:01,220 --> 01:05:04,340
I bet you they could only fine him for something.

1243
01:05:04,340 --> 01:05:05,340
Wow.

1244
01:05:05,340 --> 01:05:06,340
What was his first name?

1245
01:05:06,340 --> 01:05:07,340
Something Garcia?

1246
01:05:07,340 --> 01:05:10,340
I think it said Jorge.

1247
01:05:10,340 --> 01:05:11,340
Jorge?

1248
01:05:11,340 --> 01:05:12,340
Okay.

1249
01:05:12,340 --> 01:05:13,340
It's the...

1250
01:05:13,340 --> 01:05:14,340
Oh, hang on.

1251
01:05:14,340 --> 01:05:15,340
No, Joaquin.

1252
01:05:15,340 --> 01:05:16,340
Joaquin, okay.

1253
01:05:16,340 --> 01:05:17,340
Joaquin Garcia.

1254
01:05:17,340 --> 01:05:18,340
Okay, for ass-paddling.

1255
01:05:18,340 --> 01:05:19,340
And then what was the...

1256
01:05:19,340 --> 01:05:26,340
Yeah, I was reading the story as you were giving out the ass-paddling, but I said, well,

1257
01:05:26,340 --> 01:05:36,340
I think I know somebody else is going to be on this list.

1258
01:05:36,340 --> 01:05:37,340
Yep.

1259
01:05:37,340 --> 01:05:39,220
And then what type of a business was it?

1260
01:05:39,220 --> 01:05:40,220
A wastewater...

1261
01:05:40,220 --> 01:05:41,220
What was it?

1262
01:05:41,220 --> 01:05:42,220
Yeah, a wastewater company.

1263
01:05:42,220 --> 01:05:43,220
Okay.

1264
01:05:43,220 --> 01:05:54,220
He was an engineer, worked for the local government, and ended up at the wastewater treatment place.

1265
01:05:54,220 --> 01:05:55,220
Okay.

1266
01:05:55,220 --> 01:05:57,620
All right, cool.

1267
01:05:57,620 --> 01:05:59,620
I got to put them on the ass-paddling too.

1268
01:05:59,620 --> 01:06:07,340
But hey, if we're going to do that, we need to add the city council and the water company

1269
01:06:07,340 --> 01:06:08,340
to that mass, Alex.

1270
01:06:08,340 --> 01:06:11,620
Because neither one of them knew who the hell was in charge of it.

1271
01:06:11,620 --> 01:06:12,620
Oh, you know what?

1272
01:06:12,620 --> 01:06:14,620
That's right.

1273
01:06:14,620 --> 01:06:16,060
Okay.

1274
01:06:16,060 --> 01:06:19,260
City council and then who else?

1275
01:06:19,260 --> 01:06:22,140
The water company.

1276
01:06:22,140 --> 01:06:23,140
And the water company.

1277
01:06:23,140 --> 01:06:24,140
Good.

1278
01:06:24,140 --> 01:06:25,140
Good, good.

1279
01:06:25,140 --> 01:06:26,140
Yeah.

1280
01:06:26,140 --> 01:06:27,140
Okay.

1281
01:06:27,140 --> 01:06:34,780
We might have to extend the next list to like 12 or 13 or something.

1282
01:06:34,780 --> 01:06:39,100
So all right, Rob, I've got a little bit lighter.

1283
01:06:39,100 --> 01:06:40,820
Well, that was a funny story.

1284
01:06:40,820 --> 01:06:44,580
So I've got a little bit of lighthearted story here.

1285
01:06:44,580 --> 01:06:49,780
I hear trumpets and angels, Rob.

1286
01:06:49,780 --> 01:06:52,260
I was hoping we could hear them tonight.

1287
01:06:52,260 --> 01:06:54,340
Well, we do.

1288
01:06:54,340 --> 01:07:01,660
The Passport to Paris collection includes three new flavors inspired by, let's see,

1289
01:07:01,660 --> 01:07:03,660
what kind of, Crispy Cream.

1290
01:07:03,660 --> 01:07:04,660
I believe it is.

1291
01:07:04,660 --> 01:07:05,660
Damn it.

1292
01:07:05,660 --> 01:07:06,660
It cut off.

1293
01:07:06,660 --> 01:07:09,420
Yeah, it's Crispy Cream.

1294
01:07:09,420 --> 01:07:10,420
Sorry.

1295
01:07:10,420 --> 01:07:11,420
It cut off at the first.

1296
01:07:11,420 --> 01:07:12,420
I don't know why.

1297
01:07:12,420 --> 01:07:13,420
I don't know why my printer did that.

1298
01:07:13,420 --> 01:07:14,980
But anyhow, okay.

1299
01:07:14,980 --> 01:07:19,420
Crispy Cream is the one sponsoring this and it's called the Passport to Paris collection.

1300
01:07:19,420 --> 01:07:24,340
So it includes three different donuts that, and the Passport to Paris is of course for

1301
01:07:24,340 --> 01:07:28,980
the Olympics in Paris, France this year and it's saluting them.

1302
01:07:28,980 --> 01:07:35,020
So the one of the first one on the list of three is creme brulee donut, an unglazed shell

1303
01:07:35,020 --> 01:07:40,620
donut filled with creme brulee cream filling dipped in creme brulee caramel icing and topped

1304
01:07:40,620 --> 01:07:43,900
with caramelized sugar crunch.

1305
01:07:43,900 --> 01:07:45,460
Hear trumpets yet?

1306
01:07:45,460 --> 01:07:46,460
Yeah.

1307
01:07:46,460 --> 01:07:48,260
Yeah, I hear them.

1308
01:07:48,260 --> 01:07:52,060
I hear angels also.

1309
01:07:52,060 --> 01:07:59,080
Number two one on this list would be double chocolate eclair donut, an unclaired and unglazed

1310
01:07:59,080 --> 01:08:04,260
shell donut filled with chocolate custard cream filling dipped in chocolate icing and

1311
01:08:04,260 --> 01:08:07,060
topped with chocolate crisp pearls.

1312
01:08:07,060 --> 01:08:08,060
Whatever that is.

1313
01:08:08,060 --> 01:08:10,060
Sounds good though, doesn't it?

1314
01:08:10,060 --> 01:08:12,300
Yes, it does.

1315
01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:19,020
Alright number three is raspberry and vanilla cream donut, an original glazed donut dipped

1316
01:08:19,020 --> 01:08:26,260
in raspberry icing and cookie pieces and with dollop and vanilla cream, dolloped vanilla

1317
01:08:26,260 --> 01:08:30,160
cream not dollop and the dolloped with vanilla cream.

1318
01:08:30,160 --> 01:08:32,520
So it has vanilla cream dollops on it.

1319
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:35,100
That sounds pretty solid to me.

1320
01:08:35,100 --> 01:08:36,100
What do you think?

1321
01:08:36,100 --> 01:08:37,100
Yeah, that does.

1322
01:08:37,100 --> 01:08:43,460
Ahead of the launch Dave Skeena, Krispy Kreme's global chief brand officer said in a statement,

1323
01:08:43,460 --> 01:08:47,420
most people can't be in Paris to cheer on their country's team so we're giving you a

1324
01:08:47,420 --> 01:08:51,540
passport to Paris in the form of delicious donuts.

1325
01:08:51,540 --> 01:08:52,540
There you go.

1326
01:08:52,540 --> 01:08:55,540
Alright, Rob, you got something?

1327
01:08:55,540 --> 01:08:57,540
Yeah, I do.

1328
01:08:57,540 --> 01:09:00,540
I got a little one here.

1329
01:09:00,540 --> 01:09:01,540
Alrighty.

1330
01:09:01,540 --> 01:09:10,140
Don't expect a follow up to 30 from Adele anytime soon.

1331
01:09:10,140 --> 01:09:13,140
I wasn't anyhow.

1332
01:09:13,140 --> 01:09:21,980
In a recent interview with German broadcaster ZDF, the artist confirmed that she doesn't

1333
01:09:21,980 --> 01:09:29,620
have any plans for new music and shared her desire to work on other pursuits.

1334
01:09:29,620 --> 01:09:33,380
I don't have any plans for new music at all, Adele said.

1335
01:09:33,380 --> 01:09:40,660
I want a big break after this and I think I want to do other creative things just for

1336
01:09:40,660 --> 01:09:44,420
a while.

1337
01:09:44,420 --> 01:09:45,420
Why not?

1338
01:09:45,420 --> 01:09:50,340
Yeah, she can afford it now.

1339
01:09:50,340 --> 01:09:52,140
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

1340
01:09:52,140 --> 01:09:56,620
She hit her success, she has her money so now she can do what she wants and I respect

1341
01:09:56,620 --> 01:09:57,700
that.

1342
01:09:57,700 --> 01:09:58,700
I respect that.

1343
01:09:58,700 --> 01:10:02,220
She's not fame chasing, she's staying true to herself.

1344
01:10:02,220 --> 01:10:03,220
I think that's fantastic.

1345
01:10:03,220 --> 01:10:04,220
Is that it?

1346
01:10:04,220 --> 01:10:05,220
I mean, she's going to do other things.

1347
01:10:05,220 --> 01:10:12,220
She wants to dig into other creativity.

1348
01:10:12,220 --> 01:10:17,180
Yeah, but she's not wanting to be constantly on the charts and constantly on tour and I

1349
01:10:17,180 --> 01:10:18,180
think that's awesome.

1350
01:10:18,180 --> 01:10:19,180
Right.

1351
01:10:19,180 --> 01:10:22,980
I mean, she is getting a little older now.

1352
01:10:22,980 --> 01:10:24,740
Yeah, yep, yep.

1353
01:10:24,740 --> 01:10:29,700
So yeah, yep, she is and probably thinking I want to do some of the stuff I want to do

1354
01:10:29,700 --> 01:10:32,460
now, kind of like you and I on the podcast.

1355
01:10:32,460 --> 01:10:37,620
We got all this stuff behind us and now we're like we're going to do what we want.

1356
01:10:37,620 --> 01:10:42,820
So anyhow, and we've been fortunate enough to be able to get to do this and we've been

1357
01:10:42,820 --> 01:10:47,540
fortunate enough to get a really large fan base and thank you guys again.

1358
01:10:47,540 --> 01:10:48,540
Yes, we are.

1359
01:10:48,540 --> 01:10:49,540
Thank you everybody.

1360
01:10:49,540 --> 01:10:56,460
Like I go back to my little speech about, you know, why we went into this is because

1361
01:10:56,460 --> 01:11:00,940
people like you obviously enjoy it and it's an outlet.

1362
01:11:00,940 --> 01:11:01,940
So thank you guys.

1363
01:11:01,940 --> 01:11:06,300
It's an outlet for us and it's an outlet for you to hear something besides the regular

1364
01:11:06,300 --> 01:11:07,380
shit.

1365
01:11:07,380 --> 01:11:09,380
So thank you all.

1366
01:11:09,380 --> 01:11:11,660
Hi, Grandma Opal.

1367
01:11:11,660 --> 01:11:13,460
Hi, Jimmy.

1368
01:11:13,460 --> 01:11:14,820
Hi, Ricky.

1369
01:11:14,820 --> 01:11:16,820
Hi, Godfrey.

1370
01:11:16,820 --> 01:11:18,180
Hi Grandma Opal.

1371
01:11:18,180 --> 01:11:19,180
Hi Ricky.

1372
01:11:19,180 --> 01:11:20,180
Hi Jimmy.

1373
01:11:20,180 --> 01:11:21,980
Hi all of Dodge City, Kansas.

1374
01:11:21,980 --> 01:11:22,980
Ra-Ra.

1375
01:11:22,980 --> 01:11:23,980
We love you guys.

1376
01:11:23,980 --> 01:11:24,980
You guys kick ass.

1377
01:11:24,980 --> 01:11:27,180
Ed, I'm going to insert your promo here.

1378
01:11:27,180 --> 01:11:30,420
Well, it'll actually we don't have another break.

1379
01:11:30,420 --> 01:11:33,380
Maybe I'll do it right before the ending.

1380
01:11:33,380 --> 01:11:34,980
If I remember, I'll do that.

1381
01:11:34,980 --> 01:11:41,260
Okay, anyhow, the Silver Pocket Watch was a prized possession of Theodore Roosevelt,

1382
01:11:41,260 --> 01:11:47,500
a keepsake given to him by his sister and her husband in 1898 before he became president

1383
01:11:47,500 --> 01:11:53,500
that would travel with him around the world and end up at Sycamore Hill.

1384
01:11:53,500 --> 01:11:58,300
That's his home in Long Island, New York, and now a national historic site.

1385
01:11:58,300 --> 01:12:02,460
But in 1987, hang on, I'm going to get my glasses out.

1386
01:12:02,460 --> 01:12:04,300
My damn printer is messing up again.

1387
01:12:04,300 --> 01:12:09,260
Now it's doubled and I thought I had the damn thing fixed.

1388
01:12:09,260 --> 01:12:11,300
Anyhow, okay.

1389
01:12:11,300 --> 01:12:18,860
In 1987, it went from museum piece to pulverized, I guess.

1390
01:12:18,860 --> 01:12:19,860
No, Pilford Prize.

1391
01:12:19,860 --> 01:12:20,860
Okay, I'm sorry.

1392
01:12:20,860 --> 01:12:23,820
It is really light right here and it's double.

1393
01:12:23,820 --> 01:12:24,820
It's smudged.

1394
01:12:24,820 --> 01:12:27,900
Okay, let me see if I can piece this all together here.

1395
01:12:27,900 --> 01:12:34,420
Okay, but in 1987, it went from museum piece to Poliford Prize.

1396
01:12:34,420 --> 01:12:37,860
I think that's yeah, like a Pulcher Prize.

1397
01:12:37,860 --> 01:12:39,020
I'm going to go with Pulcher.

1398
01:12:39,020 --> 01:12:40,780
I think that's what is prize.

1399
01:12:40,780 --> 01:12:45,540
And someone stole it from an unlocked case at the Theodore Roosevelt Inaugural National

1400
01:12:45,540 --> 01:12:49,700
Historic Site in Buffalo, New York, where it was on loan.

1401
01:12:49,700 --> 01:12:55,020
It was a mystery that endured 36 years until it turned up at a Florida auction house last

1402
01:12:55,020 --> 01:12:57,580
year and was seized by federal agents.

1403
01:12:57,580 --> 01:13:02,300
On Thursday, it was returned to public display at Sycamore Hill as the National Park Service

1404
01:13:02,300 --> 01:13:07,460
and the FBI triumphantly announced it was back home during a ceremony featuring Roosevelt's

1405
01:13:07,460 --> 01:13:10,060
great-grandson, Tweed Roosevelt.

1406
01:13:10,060 --> 01:13:12,500
Oh my gosh.

1407
01:13:12,500 --> 01:13:15,780
Tweed Roosevelt, really?

1408
01:13:15,780 --> 01:13:18,980
Tweed?

1409
01:13:18,980 --> 01:13:20,220
This was feel-good news.

1410
01:13:20,220 --> 01:13:22,020
Tweed Roosevelt, 82.

1411
01:13:22,020 --> 01:13:23,500
Oh my gosh.

1412
01:13:23,500 --> 01:13:28,460
Tweed Roosevelt is 82.

1413
01:13:28,460 --> 01:13:30,500
He survived that long with the name Tweed.

1414
01:13:30,500 --> 01:13:34,620
He's got to be pretty tough, wouldn't you say?

1415
01:13:34,620 --> 01:13:37,460
He's almost like the boy named Sue at this point.

1416
01:13:37,460 --> 01:13:40,260
Yeah.

1417
01:13:40,260 --> 01:13:45,540
Tweed Roosevelt, 82, said Friday in a phone interview, for me, it kind of felt like almost

1418
01:13:45,540 --> 01:13:52,360
as if a piece of TR spirit returned to Sycamore Hill, like a little bit of him was coming

1419
01:13:52,360 --> 01:13:53,360
back.

1420
01:13:53,360 --> 01:13:54,360
And it's Sycamore, not Sycamore.

1421
01:13:54,360 --> 01:13:58,080
I think I said Sycamore, I think because it's smudged up ahead.

1422
01:13:58,080 --> 01:14:01,180
It's actually pretty good down here, the print.

1423
01:14:01,180 --> 01:14:05,420
Sycamore Hill, like a little bit of him was coming back.

1424
01:14:05,420 --> 01:14:07,580
And so I felt this was really cool.

1425
01:14:07,580 --> 01:14:11,060
Anyhow, you got anything, Rob, or you want to shut this shit show down?

1426
01:14:11,060 --> 01:14:15,620
We going to put some brakes on or are we going to keep going?

1427
01:14:15,620 --> 01:14:17,100
I got one more here.

1428
01:14:17,100 --> 01:14:18,100
All righty.

1429
01:14:18,100 --> 01:14:19,100
Why not?

1430
01:14:19,100 --> 01:14:20,100
All right, yep.

1431
01:14:20,100 --> 01:14:27,580
Former NFL star, Terrell Davis, was handcuffed and taken off a flight after an incident

1432
01:14:27,580 --> 01:14:30,420
with a flight attendant this past weekend.

1433
01:14:30,420 --> 01:14:32,620
Wasn't it over ice cream or something stupid?

1434
01:14:32,620 --> 01:14:34,620
Yeah, it was.

1435
01:14:34,620 --> 01:14:35,620
Okay.

1436
01:14:35,620 --> 01:14:43,980
Davis and his family were on a United Airlines flight from Denver to Orange County on Saturday

1437
01:14:43,980 --> 01:14:45,980
when things went west.

1438
01:14:45,980 --> 01:14:52,740
It is revealed he was approached by FBI agents and placed in handcuffs as soon as the plane

1439
01:14:52,740 --> 01:14:54,740
touched down in California.

1440
01:14:54,740 --> 01:14:55,740
Oh, wow.

1441
01:14:55,740 --> 01:15:02,700
The former the former Denver Broncos star shared a post on Instagram in which he said he tapped

1442
01:15:02,700 --> 01:15:10,260
a flight attendant on the arm after his son asked for a cup of ice and was either ignored

1443
01:15:10,260 --> 01:15:12,380
or wasn't hurt.

1444
01:15:12,380 --> 01:15:19,100
The attendant is said to have snapped and shouted, don't hit me before leaving the area.

1445
01:15:19,100 --> 01:15:26,100
Davis claimed to have had no further interaction with the attendant during the flight.

1446
01:15:26,100 --> 01:15:34,100
However, six agents, including FBI personnel, came aboard after the plane landed and immediately

1447
01:15:34,100 --> 01:15:38,420
placed him in handcuffs.

1448
01:15:38,420 --> 01:15:40,660
Wow.

1449
01:15:40,660 --> 01:15:48,540
The former running back noted he was cleared of wrongdoing shortly after and that the agents

1450
01:15:48,540 --> 01:15:54,660
profusely apologized, even offering support for him and his family.

1451
01:15:54,660 --> 01:15:59,300
He is now seeking an explanation from United Airlines.

1452
01:15:59,300 --> 01:16:02,060
I would say so.

1453
01:16:02,060 --> 01:16:04,060
Wow.

1454
01:16:04,060 --> 01:16:06,060
Yeah.

1455
01:16:06,060 --> 01:16:09,900
Old TD Terrell Davis, touchdown Terrell Davis.

1456
01:16:09,900 --> 01:16:10,900
Wow.

1457
01:16:10,900 --> 01:16:11,900
Okay.

1458
01:16:11,900 --> 01:16:12,900
Thank you, Rob.

1459
01:16:12,900 --> 01:16:13,900
That was a good story.

1460
01:16:13,900 --> 01:16:22,220
I mean, I mean, it was a good story because, you know, because it was fucked up that that

1461
01:16:22,220 --> 01:16:23,220
happened.

1462
01:16:23,220 --> 01:16:24,220
Right, right, right.

1463
01:16:24,220 --> 01:16:25,220
Right.

1464
01:16:25,220 --> 01:16:30,220
He was found innocent and he was wrongdoing.

1465
01:16:30,220 --> 01:16:31,220
Cool.

1466
01:16:31,220 --> 01:16:36,220
Yeah, but he still had to be escorted off with the cuffs and all that.

1467
01:16:36,220 --> 01:16:38,340
Right, right, right.

1468
01:16:38,340 --> 01:16:40,060
But anyhow, all right.

1469
01:16:40,060 --> 01:16:42,540
Well, I guess we're going to end this show.

1470
01:16:42,540 --> 01:16:49,780
So thank you, Rob, for joining me and we will be back tomorrow night with more what we do,

1471
01:16:49,780 --> 01:16:50,780
right?

1472
01:16:50,780 --> 01:16:51,780
Yeah, that's good.

1473
01:16:51,780 --> 01:16:52,780
All right.

1474
01:16:52,780 --> 01:16:53,780
Good night, assholes.

1475
01:16:53,780 --> 01:16:54,780
Thank you.

1476
01:16:54,780 --> 01:16:55,780
Good night, assholes.

1477
01:16:55,780 --> 01:16:56,780
Oh, no.

1478
01:16:56,780 --> 01:16:57,780
Looks like the show's over, kids.

1479
01:16:57,780 --> 01:16:58,780
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.

1480
01:16:58,780 --> 01:16:59,780
Fear not, assholes.

1481
01:16:59,780 --> 01:17:24,300
They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.