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And now it's time for...

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The Daily Deucebag Pledge.

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Here at Two Deucebags in a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.

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Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys. We can and will lie if it makes the story better.

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Two Deucebags and a Microphone.

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We Talk.

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Jesus.

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This is a voice guide from your favorite podcast, Two Deucebags in a Microphone.

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People often ask us how they can find us when doing a remote broadcast.

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1. Smell.

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Go to the city market and start sniffing.

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Our aroma has been described as a mixture of flea powder for goats, Tabasco sauce, and old sock with dark fuzzy urine.

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2. Look for the spot absent of patrons.

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3. The most telling sign is a crowd of patrons vomiting uncontrollably.

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Or just call us at 816-512-7717.

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Now, from this underground bunker in Camden, Missouri, stocked full of dried guts, canned food, and a couple of vibrating...toys,

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is ramblings of a madman featuring Rob Rant.

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That man would look ridiculous solving crime on a sunny day.

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Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

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I've seen salads that dress better than you.

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Two Deucebags and a Microphone. I'm Mark.

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And I am Rob.

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Well Rob, we didn't get to talk too much before this podcast, so I didn't get a chance to ask you how you're doing,

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so I'm not going to know what you're going to say here, so how are you doing tonight?

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Actually, I'm not bad.

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Well, we're working nine and a half hour days.

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We're going in at six and getting off at four.

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And that's Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.

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Today is Tuesday.

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So, yeah, we're on our second day.

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And then we get Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday off.

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With Thursday being paid holiday.

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Okay, I got you.

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That's why we're putting in an extra hour and a half every day.

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It's just, you know, first we work Saturday until noon.

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And then all I have is Sunday pretty much.

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And I worked my butt off and we did a show that night, you know.

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Yeah, I got you.

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Yeah, I did, but yeah, my alarm set for four in the morning.

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And thank God tomorrow's the last day.

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That's cool.

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Well, good.

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This brings you back memories to COVID, man.

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We were putting in 52 and a half hours a week building boat trailers.

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Wow, during COVID?

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During COVID, yeah, two and a half years pretty much straight.

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I have the paycheck stubs to prove it.

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I believe you.

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You don't have to show me paycheck stubs, but anyhow.

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No, no, and those of us that have been there a while, yeah, we still feel it.

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Oh, yeah, I know.

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I used to work a lot of overtime too.

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And I don't anymore.

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So, anyhow, I had an interesting last few days.

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Let's see.

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I went and had an MRI done of my brain.

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And this is over the tinnitus that I'm battling.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you told me about that.

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Yeah, yeah, there's a benign tumor that you can have near your brain or somewhere in there that can cause tinnitus.

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And since my tinnitus is so prolific and, you know, loud, obnoxious, won't go away, had it forever.

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They're checking for that type of a tumor.

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So if that is true, then they're, you know, if that is what's going on, then they can do something to take that thing out and I can finally get rid of it.

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If not, I'm going to have to go to this this place that says they retrain your brain or whatever to to not hear it because I'll have no other choice.

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I mean, that's pretty much it.

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I mean, the other newer stuff like the tongue stimulation not covered by insurance.

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So, you know, so I'll have to do that.

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And then if that doesn't work, then I'll look at other methods, you know.

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So anyhow, I had a big debacle with my mower and it's still going on.

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So I buy a brand new mower.

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Yeah, yeah, I buy a brand new mower.

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OK, from one of those big box home improvement stores.

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You know, the one that really blows.

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You know what I'm saying?

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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The one that really blows.

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Yeah.

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Well, anyhow, those stupid motherfuckers, they take and they send me a riding lawnmower craftsman because that's what the guy that fixes them told me.

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And, you know, John Deere is moving anyhow, so fuck him.

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I'll never buy another thing from them.

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So he said, buy a craftsman.

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He said the John Deere's that you can buy at Lowe's or Home Depot or whatever.

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He said they're not the same as the real ones.

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If you're going to buy John Deere, you buy from the tractor company.

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They have the real ones.

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He said they make some cheap ones that they sell at the box stores.

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And he said he doesn't recommend them.

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He says he has a lot full of them.

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So he said if you want a really good mower, he said the craftsman with a Briggs and Stratton engine is easy to work on and is a pretty durable mower.

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So I went to this big box store and anyhow, I bought this mower.

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And so they said, all right, we're going to deliver it in three days.

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Okay, fine. Great.

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Well, they delivered and they delivered in the time they said, great.

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So I get on that thing dead.

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I'm like, what the hell?

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So I'm like, all right.

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Well, let's see.

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Maybe I need to hold the breakdown more.

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Okay, let's see.

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Maybe the springs on the seat.

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There's something in there that I got to take out.

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You know, I'm examining all the options.

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So I do everything.

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I'm like, all right, time to call him.

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I call him and then I get this stupid ass in lawn and garden and I tell him what's going on.

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He goes, well, all I can say is we can sell you a new battery.

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I said, what?

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I said, no, no, no, no, no, that's not that's not in the vocabulary.

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That's not even being discussed.

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I said, what are you going to do to fix my problem?

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He said, all I can do is sell you a new battery.

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And I said, all right, well, that's okay.

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What is your name?

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I got the douchebags name, not a good douchebag, a bad one.

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I call up there to the main office and I said, hey, here is what's going on.

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You know, I get a mower from you fucks.

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And I didn't say fucks, you know, and then it's not even working.

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It's dead.

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And then I call this idiot in lawn and garden and he tells me I can buy a new battery.

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And the lady that's a little bit higher up than him, she goes, oh, no, no, no.

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She goes, you can come in, get a battery, take that battery out.

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We'll give you a brand new one for free.

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Well, I had to go to work, so Val's out there and she removes the posts and everything.

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And everything is rusted.

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And it looks like maybe there might be some sort of a scratch on the side.

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So I called back down there.

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I go, hey, guys, I go, here's the deal.

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I said, I don't even want this thing anymore because you guys sold me a mower that I think is used.

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Or at the very least, number one, you didn't check it out before you sent to me.

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And number two, you left it out in the lot to rain and hail and piss all over it.

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I said, no.

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I said, this is not a new mower.

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And then I said, you know, after all the bullshit I put up with, you guys are taking this back and you're giving me a refund.

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So anyhow, so they come back.

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They said that they can get it tomorrow morning because they said, well, we'll get ahold of you Monday.

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OK, so they didn't get ahold of me Monday.

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And I told them, I said, you know what?

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I said, we have severe weather in the forecast about every damn night.

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I can't move this mower.

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It's in the backyard.

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I can't move it because it's dead.

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And I'm not going to take and break my back moving it to the garage for you guys.

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I said, so it's like this.

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You guys better come get this piece of crap because I'm not liable for it.

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I said, if a limb falls on it, then that's too bad.

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That's on you guys.

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But I'm guaranteeing you, I'm not fucking paying for it.

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I said, I'll call it visa right now.

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And I'll dispute the charges.

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And I said, and I can't wait to get on Google to explain all this.

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So they said, OK, OK, we'll buy we'll be by tomorrow morning to come get it.

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And I said, OK, so then it turned in tomorrow afternoon.

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But at least they're going to come get the piece of crap tomorrow.

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So anyhow, the last few days I've been battling that, you know, it's one of those big box stores that really blows.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Well, hey, just just a heads up.

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Yeah.

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For the rest of this episode.

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Yes.

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If you hear a dog that's boss, my beagle, he was just let inside my inside duck blind studio.

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OK.

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Well, my son's moving his girlfriend and her dog in.

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Oh, OK.

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They know him, but they got their got the door open, moving stuff in.

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He said he darks.

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He's a beagle man.

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The dogs over here.

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The dogs over here barking their ass off, dude.

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And you're going to hear it on the podcast when you relist it, when I post it.

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So I don't think it's a big deal.

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And not only that, but aren't the people getting their money's worth?

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It's free.

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Oh, yeah, they are.

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Hey, you want to know what this is part of our real lives.

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Yeah.

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What you see is what you get.

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And you know what?

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I mean, it's free.

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So you're getting your money's worth.

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All right.

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Let me go into this.

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OK, moving on.

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All right.

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Last podcast, we inform you about John Deere leaving Dubuque, Iowa and bailing to Mexico.

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Well, apparently this tool sack doesn't have enough money.

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It's been reported that CEO John May is selling his Illinois ranch.

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Rillator.

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No, I'm not kidding you.

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Rillator.com reported that the 80 acre property hit the market and identified its owner as

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the company's chief executive.

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Its asking price is 3.925 million, 4 million pretty much, according to its listing.

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We can only hope he moves to Mexico and stays there.

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Maybe he's afraid to stay there.

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A lot of American families are going to really suffer.

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In my opinion, this greedy asshole needs more money so he can count it and have it buried

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with him.

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Hey, rich man, remember this.

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We all eventually answer to a higher power.

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You know what I'm thinking, don't you?

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What?

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Ass paddling.

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Oh, yeah, yeah.

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They're already on the list.

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Oh, you already got them on the list.

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I already got them on the list.

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Thank you.

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But yeah, you're right.

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I'm just out here in this.

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No, no, no.

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No, it's cool.

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Yeah, ass paddling.

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That shows you we take a light.

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Yes, we do.

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And like I said, and I'll say this again, hey, rich man, we all eventually answer to

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a higher power.

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Good luck.

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So anyhow, remember my mowing problems?

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Well, I'm looking for a new mower.

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Well, I can guarantee you what brand I'm not going to be buying.

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And I'm betting most farmers feel the same.

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Don't you think?

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When their friends are displaced because the plant moved to Mexico, you think they're going

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to buy a green and yellow, the all American tractor?

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Fuck no.

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They're going to buy something else.

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If there is anything made in America anymore, we'll see.

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But anyhow, better news ahead.

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Villa Park Stadium in Birmingham, United Kingdom.

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Foo Fighters had a concert there last week when a big surprise happened.

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Dave Grohl introduced Giza.

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Yeah, Dave Grohl introduced Giza Butler, a black Sabbath to play Paranoid with a band.

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Oh, my God.

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Yeah.

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I look it up, dude.

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Look it up.

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It's got to.

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I got I mean, almost cried.

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It's so good.

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I got four days coming up.

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OK.

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I'll find time.

243
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:06,000
So Dave Grohl introduced Giza Butler, black Sabbath to play Paranoid with a band with

244
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,000
the crowd roaring.

245
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:09,000
Grohl said he's never played a concert here.

246
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,000
He's never seen a concert here.

247
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:14,000
So we thought this would be a very special event.

248
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:17,000
Ladies and gentlemen, Giza Butler from black Sabbath.

249
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:20,000
The crowd and social media went into a frenzy.

250
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:22,000
This was very cool.

251
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Recently, Dave Grohl said that all the grunge bands owe black Sabbath for their sound.

252
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,000
And I agree, don't you think?

253
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:32,000
Don't you think that's pretty much right on?

254
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:33,000
Yeah.

255
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,000
Yeah.

256
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:39,000
I mean, I mean, it's not quite, you know, it's it's improvised and it's, you know,

257
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:44,000
but you could tell some of their sound came from that that type of music.

258
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,000
Yeah.

259
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,000
Yeah.

260
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:47,000
So yeah.

261
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:49,000
But, you know, I mean, Kurt Cobain would have never admitted it.

262
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,000
You know, at least at least Soundgarden did.

263
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:54,000
You know, they often refer to their music as Beatles meets black Sabbath.

264
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,000
And I agree with that.

265
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:58,000
I think that's a pretty good assessment.

266
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:02,000
I like Soundgarden quite a bit considerably.

267
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:04,000
And Chris Cornell was pretty honest.

268
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:08,000
And when he said that they wanted to be like black Sabbath meets the Beatles,

269
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,000
I think he's pretty dead on, don't you?

270
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:13,000
No pun intended.

271
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,000
No, no, I agree.

272
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,000
I agree 100 percent.

273
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,000
OK.

274
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,000
All right.

275
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:27,000
Here is a list of the highest priced burger chains in America.

276
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:32,000
They did a survey and they found out what the top five prices.

277
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:35,000
Well, you know, the better price from the least prize.

278
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,000
The last one's going to be the least price.

279
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,000
The first one's going to be the highest priced.

280
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:46,000
So five five guys is the most price is at twenty dollars and eighty four cents.

281
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:47,000
Per person.

282
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:48,000
Yeah.

283
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,000
Yeah.

284
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,000
I mean, with the fries and everything is I think what they're talking about,

285
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,000
like a value meal type of meal.

286
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:54,000
Yeah.

287
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,000
Yeah.

288
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:57,000
Well, I mean, that's still pretty up there.

289
00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:01,000
And I mean, like I said, 13 bucks, you can go get a real meal.

290
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:07,000
You can get like mashed potatoes and gravy and I don't know, ham steak or chicken

291
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,000
fried steak, meatloaf.

292
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,000
Yeah.

293
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,000
Yeah.

294
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:14,000
Why would you go to this burger joint, which in my opinion isn't that good,

295
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,000
and spend twenty eighty four.

296
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,000
So get the fried fish, whatever.

297
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,000
Yeah.

298
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,000
Whatever the hell you want, man.

299
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,000
Get a salad, whatever.

300
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,000
Yeah.

301
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:29,000
So anyhow, then the second price is burger chain is Jack in the Box at thirteen seventy five.

302
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:34,000
And OK, it may be but Jack in the Box, I think everyone knows you have to.

303
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,000
They load you down though.

304
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,000
They do.

305
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:38,000
They load you down.

306
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:39,000
And also you got to look for the sales.

307
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,000
Yeah.

308
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,000
They have sales all the time.

309
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:45,000
I mean, they'll have like four tacos for three bucks or, you know,

310
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,000
and stuff like that.

311
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:48,000
And they do have sales.

312
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,000
Whenever they have sales, they have cheaper food.

313
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:54,000
But like you said, they do load you down and they give you a serving.

314
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:58,000
So and I'm kind of fond of Jack in the Box.

315
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,000
Are you?

316
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,000
Well, yeah, I am.

317
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,000
I am.

318
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:05,000
I like their tacos.

319
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:06,000
Their tacos are incredible.

320
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,000
OK.

321
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:09,000
We don't have one here.

322
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:13,000
But when I travel, I got to hit a jack in the box.

323
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,000
Give me tacos.

324
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,000
Yeah, me too.

325
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:22,000
That used to be the first thing I did before they came to Kansas City again is whenever I was down in Texas doing a job,

326
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:26,000
the first thing I demanded was we roll into Jack in the Box and get some tacos.

327
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:30,000
And then pretty soon everyone agreed with me after they had them.

328
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:34,000
Third is Wendy's at twelve forty one.

329
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,000
And you know what?

330
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:40,000
Wendy's is actually they have a really good burger.

331
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,000
They have quality fries.

332
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:46,000
They have really good quality control, at least the one that I go to near my house.

333
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:49,000
I don't necessarily have a problem with their price.

334
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:53,000
I think it's worth a little bit more than Burger King or McDonald's.

335
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:57,000
So so Wendy's comes in at twelve forty one.

336
00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:05,000
But then again, if I have my choice and had time to sit down, I would go up here to Caleb's or go to First Watch or something and get a real meal.

337
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:08,000
So so anyhow.

338
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:17,000
So then the next one is Burger King comes in at ten sixty one per person.

339
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:26,000
And I was surprised that Burger King wasn't cheaper than McDonald's because it seems like Burger King's always having like two junior Whoppers and fries for five bucks.

340
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:32,000
Doesn't it seem like they're always got some sort of a deal going on?

341
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,000
Yeah, yeah.

342
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,000
Yeah.

343
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:41,000
So anyhow, and then the last and the best price is McDonald's coming in at seven fifty seven a person.

344
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:46,000
So I don't know what all the scuttlebutt is about McD's, you know, charging more and all that.

345
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:49,000
You know, oh, there's a big thing about it.

346
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:52,000
People think that McD's is like, no, no, no, I know.

347
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:56,000
I know the big thing is just that now they're the lowest.

348
00:18:56,000 --> 00:19:00,000
Give me a burger, fries and a drink for McDonald's.

349
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,000
It's like ten, twelve bucks.

350
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:06,000
Oh, really? I wonder how they figured this out then.

351
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,000
I don't know.

352
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:08,000
OK, then.

353
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,000
All right.

354
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,000
Forget it.

355
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,000
I mean, you know what?

356
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:20,000
I'm going to have to relook all of this, but I thought it was it came from like, I don't know, one of those living magazines that like, you know, that gives you information.

357
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,000
Wait a second.

358
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,000
I know what it is.

359
00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,000
What is it?

360
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,000
I had an extra burger.

361
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:27,000
Oh, OK.

362
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,000
That's what it is.

363
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,000
OK.

364
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:32,000
Yeah, yeah, the little their little meals don't fill me up.

365
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,000
So I yeah, I have to add the extra.

366
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:37,000
Yeah, for seven sixty seven, you don't get a lot.

367
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:41,000
So, yeah, you know, we're way above forty two.

368
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,000
Yep.

369
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,000
Yeah.

370
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,000
And here's another little hint.

371
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:52,000
If you go to a cafe, like I said, don't get the soda, get coffee or water.

372
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,000
They're cheap.

373
00:19:53,000 --> 00:20:01,000
They jack the sodas up and the orange juices and all that stuff up to make up their money that they're not charging you on the food.

374
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,000
So just a little hint.

375
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:09,000
Anytime you get a soda at a real restaurant, it's at least three fifty or higher.

376
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,000
So, OK.

377
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,000
Anyhow, let's see here.

378
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:21,000
There's a survey that found the favorite sock for boomers.

379
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:33,000
This is generational sock habits, by the way, a survey found that favorite sock for boomers are boot socks when Gen Xers are more in favor of ankle socks.

380
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:43,000
Millennials have a strong preference for no show socks with Gen Z favoring crew socks.

381
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:47,000
I had no idea there were so many socks to you.

382
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,000
No, I did not either.

383
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,000
I'm not even sure what all these are.

384
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,000
I don't know.

385
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:55,000
What is it there's between a no show sock and an ankle sock?

386
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,000
Aren't they pretty much the same?

387
00:20:57,000 --> 00:21:01,000
No, actually, actually, I just seen them.

388
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:05,000
I just went and bought me a pack of ankle socks the other day.

389
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,000
Oh, so they are different than the ones.

390
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,000
It's hot weather.

391
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,000
Oh, yeah.

392
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:19,000
I wear I wear like regular tennis shoes and I want something covering my ankles.

393
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:25,000
You know, yeah, but I've seen these no show socks.

394
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:30,000
They're the ones that looks like they're going barefooted with their shoes on, right?

395
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:34,000
Those are the ones for the people that wear crocs.

396
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,000
OK, OK.

397
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,000
Now you're making sense of it.

398
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,000
OK.

399
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,000
Thank you, Rob.

400
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,000
You're making a lot of sense there.

401
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,000
So that's what the difference is.

402
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:49,000
Yeah, because if you put your foot in a shoe, you know, you want your stuff covered a little bit.

403
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:55,000
You know, you want your sock up just a little bit above the.

404
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:56,000
I do too.

405
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:57,000
I like ankle socks.

406
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:00,000
Yeah, because they don't feel so weird.

407
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,000
They don't go down into your shoe when you're walking.

408
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:06,000
But what I've seen, but what I've seen was a no show.

409
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,000
Do you have that extra little bit at the top?

410
00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:13,000
It was like, OK, OK.

411
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,000
Go ahead.

412
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,000
I'm sorry.

413
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,000
We make a slip, you know.

414
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:18,000
OK, I got you.

415
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:21,000
So the no show is a lot smaller than the ankle.

416
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,000
It goes underneath the shoes.

417
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,000
The ankle.

418
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:25,000
Yeah.

419
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:28,000
And the ankle comes up to the ankle and you can see it through a shoe.

420
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:29,000
OK.

421
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:30,000
Yeah.

422
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:33,000
So number one, I had no idea there are so many socks to during winter.

423
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:37,000
I want the over the calf thick wool ones.

424
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:38,000
Right.

425
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:41,000
I mean, don't you wear the really the really long, thick one,

426
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:44,000
stern winter when it's really cold?

427
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,000
I just wear tube socks.

428
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,000
Oh, OK.

429
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,000
Well, I mean, they wear jeans.

430
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,000
I wear tube socks.

431
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,000
They are tube socks.

432
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:53,000
I wear ankle socks.

433
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:54,000
OK.

434
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:55,000
All right.

435
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,000
So all right.

436
00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:03,000
So, you know, and then during the summer, I wear the ankle socks.

437
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:07,000
I don't look goony when I'm fucking walking around in shorts.

438
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:13,000
You know, so anyway, 44 percent of millennials think no show socks are a no go.

439
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:17,000
Sixty eight percent of crew sock loving Gen Zers agree.

440
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:25,000
Regarding ankle socks, 23 percent and 59 percent believe they're just not in any longer.

441
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:32,000
Oh, and almost forgot out the greatest generation, the oldest generation alive right now.

442
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:37,000
Their socks are compression socks.

443
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:41,000
Sorry, not sorry.

444
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:44,000
OK, I had to go there.

445
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:45,000
Yes, I did.

446
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:52,000
So, so I'm going to go ahead and cut that one short because we're like getting way on the podcast

447
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:54,000
and we haven't heard from you yet.

448
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:57,000
So, Rob, please go ahead.

449
00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:59,000
Yeah, this one may get a little winky.

450
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,000
I'm going to try to cut a little bit of it out.

451
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,000
OK.

452
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:13,000
The water bill at the Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis residence appears to be pretty low after recent revelations

453
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:19,000
the couple made about the family's bathing habits.

454
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:20,000
OK.

455
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:26,000
In a recent appearance on Dax Shepard's Armchair Expert podcast,

456
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:34,000
they admit they're not that into bathing themselves or their children.

457
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:38,000
Demetri, four and Wyatt six.

458
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:48,000
The conversation started when Shepard explained his ongoing disagreement with Toho's Monica Padman.

459
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:56,000
The two of his sceptic views over whether people should use soap.

460
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,000
OK.

461
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:04,000
You should not be getting rid of all the natural oil in your skin with a bar of soap every day, he said.

462
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,000
It's insane.

463
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:07,000
He might.

464
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:08,000
He might be right.

465
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:13,000
Shepard was very candid about her bathing ritual.

466
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:24,000
I don't wash my body with soap every day, she shared, but I wash my pits, tits and holes and holes.

467
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:30,000
I can't believe I'm in the minority here washing my whole body in the shower.

468
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:43,000
And Wyatt, who taught you not to wash? Well, Kunis goes into how she grew up in Ukraine and, you know.

469
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:48,000
Uh huh. Yeah, yeah. I knew she was Ukrainian. I didn't know she grew up there.

470
00:25:48,000 --> 00:26:00,000
And then Kutcher added that he regularly used soap and water just on his armpits and crotch and nothing else.

471
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:04,000
Wow.

472
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:15,000
But then later down the line, well, that Shepard's wife piped in, Ruth and Belle.

473
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:20,000
Yeah, they don't bathe their kids regularly at night time either.

474
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,000
Uh huh. Wow.

475
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,000
Yeah, that's crazy.

476
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:35,000
OK. OK, wow. But I mean, they are right. It does hurt the oil. You know, it does take the oils away.

477
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:41,000
It does. It does. I agree. I agree. I don't know, man.

478
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:48,000
Boy, it's it's lightening a lot out there. Geez. Oh, oh, and I got to tell my story about trying to get to work yesterday.

479
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:55,000
Did you get very much right? Did you get very much rain yesterday, Rob?

480
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:59,000
Uh, it stopped about daybreak.

481
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:07,000
OK, well, we had rain till one o'clock. It started at nine until like one in the afternoon and it was pouring rain.

482
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:14,000
It was flooding rain. We got six inches of rain within that time frame, about two in the morning to about one in the afternoon.

483
00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:21,000
So I'm headed to. Yeah, it was pretty bad. So I heard that.

484
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:28,000
So anyhow, I'm driving to work and I start noticing right in front of me on minor drive there.

485
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:32,000
Cars are stalling out and I'm like, oh, that's not good.

486
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:39,000
So I turned around and went back the other way towards home and I said, well, I'm just going to have to call into work and say,

487
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:44,000
I'm either going to be late or not come in because we're having all this flash flooding, of course.

488
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:50,000
So I go the other way and there's this big dip in a creek before I get to my house.

489
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:55,000
And it's flooded, too. There's cars there. Stopped, stranded.

490
00:27:55,000 --> 00:28:00,000
And when I started to go down the hill, I could fear I could feel my Jeep starting to sway.

491
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:07,000
So I pulled in this Avila College's parking lot and I sat there until all the rain stopped and it drained.

492
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:11,000
And I called my work and I said, look, I said, I can't go either way.

493
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:14,000
I'm stuck in this parking lot at Avila and it's on a hill.

494
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:22,000
But I said, when I left the house, the creek down there wasn't flooded and, you know, minor drive was flooded.

495
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:27,000
And then I go back and the creek's flooded. So all I can do is just sit here and ride this out.

496
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:35,000
So he said, all right, when you get in, come see me. Yeah, it was it was the most amount of rain and flooding I've seen in a long time.

497
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:39,000
So I didn't hear it was that bad. Oh, it was horrible.

498
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:42,000
But the thing is, it was only on the south side.

499
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:49,000
The north side may have gotten a quarter inch of rain.

500
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:54,000
Isn't that weird how that happens? So anyhow.

501
00:28:54,000 --> 00:29:01,000
Yeah, I'm thinking more down around Belton, Ericsonville, or Belton, Grand Butte.

502
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:13,000
They got a lot of rain there, but this particular swath from northern Olathe, extreme southern Jackson County, Morton City,

503
00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:20,000
a little further north to that. Yeah, Lee's Summit all got around six inches of rain or six plus inches of rain.

504
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:25,000
And yeah, and when I went by Indian Creek, it was all flooded.

505
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:32,000
And anyhow, I was then Brush Creek was looking really suspect when I went by that bridge.

506
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,000
So I don't know exactly what happened.

507
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,000
But by the time I got through working, everything, everything was cleared out.

508
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,000
But it was getting a little crazy there for a little bit.

509
00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:44,000
And it's storming again, all kinds of lightning out there. So we'll see if we flood again.

510
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:49,000
Very possible. This year has been very odd. That's for sure weather wise.

511
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:56,000
But you know, I mean, everyone's been odd. I mean, we got a we got a cat five hurricane in the Gulf right now.

512
00:29:56,000 --> 00:30:00,000
Earliest one ever. I don't know.

513
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:07,000
I should have never made fun of Mother Nature. Should have I should never gave her an ass paddling. Right.

514
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:13,000
Right. I think we caused this, Rob. Or I caused it. I'm the one that gave her an ass paddling.

515
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:16,000
I apologize. I don't know what else to do.

516
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:19,000
We already determined that.

517
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:23,000
Well, evidently, she's still not happy with me.

518
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:27,000
So I don't know what to do, Rob. I mean, should I maybe offer her something?

519
00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:31,000
I mean, what what does Mother Nature like?

520
00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:34,000
I don't know. A Whitman Sand Planner?

521
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:35,000
Plant a tree.

522
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:41,000
Plant a tree. All right. I'm on that tomorrow. I'm on that tomorrow. Thanks, Rob.

523
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:47,000
All righty. Let's take our first break way late and we'll be right back.

524
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:58,000
As much fun as an electric can opener to the scrotum.

525
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:01,000
Two douchebags and a microphone.

526
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:07,000
Phoenix, Arizona. Thank you for listening.

527
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:12,000
Two douchebags and microphone. Suddenly, you. We love you guys.

528
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:15,000
And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.

529
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:26,000
Let's see here. A package of eight hot dogs. A package of ten hot dog buns.

530
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:32,000
I would have to buy ten packs of hot dogs and eight packs of buns to even it out.

531
00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:36,000
Should I buy them at once? Should I freeze them?

532
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:40,000
Or just continue to zigzag them and hope for the best?

533
00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,000
I hate adulting.

534
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:49,000
Oh, shit. What's that over there?

535
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:53,000
Oh, no. It's the island of horrible jokes.

536
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:03,000
Well, I just saw two red-breasted birds sunning on a limb.

537
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:07,000
They must be Baskin Robbins.

538
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:20,000
Brick Shit House Energy Drink. That's right. Brick Shit House Energy Drink.

539
00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:22,000
Make men and women go.

540
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,000
Chomp your balls.

541
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,000
You want to fuck shit up?

542
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,000
You want to fuck shit up? You want to fuck shit up?

543
00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:30,000
Brick Shit Houses are useful.

544
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:33,000
Please enjoy Brick Shit House Energy Drink responsibly.

545
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:37,000
It's not readily available anywhere because of liability issues.

546
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:41,000
Tomorrow morning while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte,

547
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:45,000
remember to not get your genitals caught in the grinder.

548
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:49,000
It really hurts. Who can afford plastic surgery?

549
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,000
Stay safe, everyone.

550
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:55,000
Attention! Attention! Harrisonville, Missouri.

551
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,000
Thank you for listening.

552
00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:01,000
Two Douchebags Microphone salutes you.

553
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:05,000
We love you guys. You know who you are.

554
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:18,000
Two Douchebags and a microphone. I'm Mark.

555
00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:21,000
And I am Rob Rad.

556
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,000
All right, Rob Rad.

557
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:27,000
Do you got a story you want to go into?

558
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:32,000
Yeah, I got one I can go into. I got one pulled up right here.

559
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:40,000
Actually, it's an update from our last episode.

560
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:45,000
Hopefully you put them out in order.

561
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:46,000
Okay.

562
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:48,000
Just for this story.

563
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,000
I did. I put them out in order.

564
00:33:50,000 --> 00:34:00,000
Okay. Well, I told you about the waitress down here in Campton at Fish Company

565
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:06,000
that got pushed into the lake by people that were dodging their bill.

566
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:17,000
Okay. Well, yesterday, I don't know,

567
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:24,000
it was the same day that I reported that. I hadn't read it yet.

568
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:25,000
Okay.

569
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:31,000
On Facebook, there's a Facebook group called Lake Area Happenings.

570
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:37,000
So anybody that wants to know anything going around Lake of the Ozarks,

571
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,000
check out Lake Area Happenings.

572
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:41,000
Mm-hmm.

573
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:53,000
Well, I ran across a post from the woman that actually got pushed in the water.

574
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,000
Okay.

575
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:57,000
The waitress.

576
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:58,000
Okay.

577
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:01,000
And I'm going to read it to you.

578
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,000
Okay.

579
00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:12,000
Says, Hi, y'all. I'm sure a lot of you have seen the post everywhere about a server being ran on,

580
00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:17,000
ran out on, and then pushed in the water.

581
00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:24,000
I am that server and just want to thank all of you for the support.

582
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:30,000
You are working and obtaining the footage from the Fish Company.

583
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:40,000
I, we are now obtaining the footage from the Fish Company.

584
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:44,000
I will now tell you all what happened.

585
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:51,000
It was about 8.30 when this group showed up and the restaurant was packed.

586
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:56,000
As soon as I went up to the table, I knew something was off,

587
00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:04,000
and then one of the young girls ordered an alcoholic drink and didn't have her ID.

588
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:07,000
Uh-huh.

589
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:16,000
So I told them I could not serve her at the table for a seat until it fit because I would not serve the girl.

590
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:20,000
About half hour later, they decided to order food.

591
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:27,000
At this point, we were on an hour and a half food wait.

592
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:35,000
I did let them know that food would be at least an hour and a half.

593
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:42,000
They continued to get very angry and their food was not yet out.

594
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:51,000
They decided they wanted to leave right as the food was about to be taken to them.

595
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:57,000
So I told them I would give it to them in eight-gold boxes.

596
00:36:57,000 --> 00:37:04,000
When I came back, they came down to the dock.

597
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:18,000
Usually when this happens and you catch them, they are like, oh, well, we totally forgot, and they give you a card.

598
00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:20,000
Uh-huh.

599
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:23,000
This did not happen.

600
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:37,000
They instead grabbed my arm, swam their boat, and pulled me into the water, and I hit the water.

601
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:41,000
They cheered and laughed.

602
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:54,000
I had my silver book with all my money and credit card slips as well as earbuds and phone in my pocket.

603
00:37:54,000 --> 00:38:02,000
Thankfully, my credit card slips and cash were able to be salvaged.

604
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:05,000
My phone is fine, thankfully.

605
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:10,000
My earbuds were in total loss, unfortunately.

606
00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:23,000
I did get back in the water for about ten minutes as there was no water, and I cannot pull myself that high up on the dock.

607
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:30,000
Thankfully, I was able to use another boat's swim platform to get up on.

608
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:35,000
I had a panic attack for about an hour and a half.

609
00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:46,000
Thankfully, I have some awesome co-workers who got me clothing and helped me clean me up and brought me out of a state of panic.

610
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:51,000
I will hopefully be able to get the pictures tomorrow.

611
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:54,000
Thank you all for your support.

612
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:57,000
I love my community here at the lake.

613
00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:01,000
Also, I did file a police report.

614
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:07,000
Yes, another update on that.

615
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:13,000
The local police are looking for two people in particular on this incident.

616
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,000
Okay.

617
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:17,000
Alright, wow.

618
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:21,000
Yeah, I mean, you don't do that.

619
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:24,000
That's just bullshit. It is.

620
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,000
Oh, it is. I agree.

621
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:32,000
There was a bunch of rough people that, yeah.

622
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:34,000
Yeah, yeah.

623
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:40,000
And there's somebody that has two young kids at home, single mother.

624
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:42,000
Yeah, I'm going to back this girl.

625
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:47,000
Well, hell yeah. And I think they'll get caught, and I hope so.

626
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:52,000
Oh yeah, they got them on video, man. There's plenty of video footage.

627
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:53,000
Cool.

628
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:59,000
Are you wanting to do the hairy asshole Olympics yet, or do you want to wait a little bit?

629
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,000
I'm ready when you are, dude.

630
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:05,000
Alright. Okay, you said you have 14 of them, right?

631
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:07,000
We agree on 14, right?

632
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:09,000
Yes.

633
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:12,000
Good. I came up with a couple extra just in case.

634
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:15,000
I did too, just in case. Just in case you threw me a loop.

635
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:16,000
Just in case.

636
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:19,000
Yeah, just in case, because we know how.

637
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:27,000
The way we run it is whoever calls that person first gets that person.

638
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:28,000
Yes.

639
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:33,000
The other one has to, yeah, we can't have the same person.

640
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,000
Yep.

641
00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:40,000
Okay, do you want to lead off, Rob? Who was your first hairy asshole?

642
00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:42,000
Sure.

643
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:43,000
Okay.

644
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:47,000
Do you have to guess?

645
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:50,000
Sasquatch, I don't know.

646
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:56,000
After my first story, hell no. My lacunas.

647
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:59,000
Okay, that's good.

648
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:02,000
Come on.

649
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:08,000
Okay, I'm putting her against Mick Foley.

650
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:10,000
Oh, you're bringing him back?

651
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:15,000
I'm bringing him back. I think he's a great candidate. He's very fucking hairy.

652
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,000
Yes.

653
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:26,000
Yeah. I mean, I don't have that much to go with, I mean, except like the non-cleaning thing.

654
00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:33,000
So I don't know if she's actually really that hairy, or I'm pretty confident Mick Foley is.

655
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:37,000
Well, if she don't clean, she ain't shaving.

656
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:39,000
Okay, all right.

657
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,000
Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.

658
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:45,000
She is Ukrainian, so, you know, not making fun of her.

659
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,000
She don't use soap that much.

660
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:50,000
Okay, all right. I mean, we can let her win.

661
00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:52,000
I figured she'd be a good one.

662
00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:57,000
All right, let's put her through. Let's put her through. I want to see her in the next round.

663
00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:02,000
You want Myla to take, you want her to take out Mick Foley.

664
00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:06,000
I just want her in it more, you know what I mean?

665
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:07,000
Yeah.

666
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:08,000
I can bring Mick Foley.

667
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:12,000
I can bring her in that story. She's raising her kids that way.

668
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:16,000
One of us will bring Mick Foley back in the next round, okay?

669
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:17,000
Oh, yeah.

670
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:23,000
Let's bring her through, okay? I mean, you don't get a story like that and just let it go.

671
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:29,000
So, okay, Myla Kunis, you are going to the second round.

672
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:36,000
And Mick Foley, we're sorry and regretful to inform you that you have lost to a female.

673
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:40,000
You can go back to writing your children's books. They're very good, I hear.

674
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:47,000
So, okay, Rob, the next one.

675
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:50,000
You know where I'm going.

676
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,000
Ashton Kutcher.

677
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:56,000
You got it.

678
00:42:56,000 --> 00:43:03,000
I'm going Robert Trujillo.

679
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:04,000
Oh.

680
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:10,000
Yeah, he is very hairy, dude.

681
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:19,000
I don't think he showers that often either if you look at his images and he's a rock star and you know he's okay.

682
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:21,000
Okay, you know what?

683
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,000
What?

684
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:28,000
Well, just just so you know for this husband and wife.

685
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:37,000
I actually had to do a battle before we started this between the husbands and wives.

686
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:43,000
Because of Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell, you know.

687
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:44,000
Yeah, I got what you said.

688
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:48,000
So I had to go which one? Yeah, well, these are the two I went with.

689
00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,000
Okay.

690
00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:52,000
Damn, dude.

691
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:54,000
Man, Robert Trujillo.

692
00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:56,000
I think you may have that one.

693
00:43:56,000 --> 00:44:01,000
I think so too. Robert Trujillo is very hairy and a damn good bassist.

694
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:03,000
So, all right.

695
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:06,000
All right, Robert Trujillo goes through.

696
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:11,000
Ashton Kutcher, you're going to have to watch your wife battle someone else next week from the stands.

697
00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:13,000
We're sorry, Ashton.

698
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:15,000
I'm surprised it's the first time.

699
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:17,000
Oh, did I say that?

700
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:21,000
No, I didn't hear anything, Rob.

701
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:22,000
All right, Rob.

702
00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:26,000
What is your third one?

703
00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:34,000
Well, while we're sticking in to the Dax 70 show, let's go with Danny Masterson.

704
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:36,000
You know what? He is in prison.

705
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:39,000
He's in prison. He's covering it up.

706
00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:43,000
Yeah, but he's kind of like in a country club prison now.

707
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:45,000
Yeah, but you still have a lot of time.

708
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:53,000
All right, I'm going to go against the late great Billy Mays, but wait, there's more.

709
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:56,000
Billy Mays is a guy with a really thick beard.

710
00:44:56,000 --> 00:45:01,000
He died from a cocaine overdose quite a few years back.

711
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:05,000
And anyhow, he's always the one that like sold stuff.

712
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,000
And he's the guy that penned the frame.

713
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,000
Oh, my gosh. Oxy Queen.

714
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:10,000
Yes, yes, you got it.

715
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:11,000
All kinds of shit.

716
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:12,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

717
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:14,000
And he's the wait, there's more guy.

718
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:17,000
I mean, he pretty much he pretty much came up with that.

719
00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:19,000
And that was his kind of like tagline was.

720
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:21,000
But wait, there's more.

721
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:27,000
So, OK, so you're going to go with Danny Masterson against Billy Mays.

722
00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,000
Billy Mays is dead.

723
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:31,000
Danny Masterson is alive.

724
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:35,000
But we never let that stop us before we put dead people in here.

725
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:46,000
You know, OK, other than a thick beard, I don't know if I have any evidence that Billy Mays is really, you know, hairy everywhere else.

726
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:54,000
Where Danny Masterson used to wear his 70s like shirt unbuttoned and he's hairy, you know, his chest is hairy.

727
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,000
So we know that much.

728
00:45:56,000 --> 00:46:00,000
So I don't know.

729
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:05,000
What do you think?

730
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:08,000
I. I'm like you.

731
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:11,000
Yeah, we don't know.

732
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:13,000
It's going to go to Topher.

733
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:15,000
Topher, but.

734
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,000
OK, it's going to go to Topher.

735
00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:20,000
Danny is in prison.

736
00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:22,000
He wants that shit covered.

737
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,000
Mm hmm.

738
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:29,000
And from the pictures I'm seeing, he's looking bushy again.

739
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:32,000
OK, then let's go with Danny Masterson.

740
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:35,000
Because I don't actually have proof that Billy Mays is that hairy.

741
00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:39,000
He's just got that really thick beard and I have a really good suspicion.

742
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:41,000
But he never did wear his.

743
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:44,000
I will give you credit on that one.

744
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:46,000
Oh, yeah, I pulled that one out of my ass.

745
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:50,000
I just don't know if that was the best opponent.

746
00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:53,000
No, that's cool. I can bring him back.

747
00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:57,000
I mean, I already brought Mick Foley back, so I'll bring him back.

748
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,000
All right.

749
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:05,000
The next one, go ahead.

750
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:08,000
Mick Mars.

751
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,000
I think he's that hairy.

752
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:13,000
I don't think he's that hairy, but OK.

753
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:16,000
He's going to guess another musician.

754
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:18,000
Used to be.

755
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:21,000
Jerry Garcia.

756
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:24,000
Oh, well.

757
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:26,000
OK, Jerry Garcia.

758
00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:28,000
Hang on, hang on, hang on.

759
00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:29,000
Billy Mays, thank you.

760
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,000
You can go back to your internal slumber.

761
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,000
Thank you for participating.

762
00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:35,000
Good luck next time.

763
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:38,000
Yeah, you can go back to the afterlife.

764
00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:39,000
Thank you.

765
00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:40,000
All right.

766
00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:42,000
And Jerry Garcia.

767
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:45,000
OK, so Jerry Garcia is still alive in our books.

768
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:46,000
Is that it?

769
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:48,000
I think Mick, yeah.

770
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:51,000
I mean, do you see where I was going there?

771
00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:52,000
Yeah.

772
00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:56,000
I think Mars should be very hairy.

773
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:59,000
I know Jerry Garcia was extremely hairy.

774
00:47:59,000 --> 00:48:01,000
Not Jerry Garcia.

775
00:48:01,000 --> 00:48:03,000
Yeah, and he's a stoner, too, you know.

776
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:08,000
So, yeah, I'm going to go Jerry Garcia all the way.

777
00:48:08,000 --> 00:48:10,000
All right.

778
00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:15,000
Go ahead with the next one.

779
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:18,000
Yoko Ohno.

780
00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:22,000
Oh, no one wants to get close to her.

781
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:24,000
Well, against another.

782
00:48:24,000 --> 00:48:26,000
Well, she's not really a musician.

783
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:27,000
She thinks she is.

784
00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:33,000
But I'm putting her against sweaty Teddy Nugent.

785
00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:37,000
Uncle Teddy.

786
00:48:37,000 --> 00:48:40,000
Let's put Yoko through.

787
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:41,000
Let's put Yoko through.

788
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:42,000
Come on.

789
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:43,000
Let's do it.

790
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:49,000
It's going to be real interesting next round.

791
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:51,000
I want Yoko to win.

792
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:52,000
Let's bring her through.

793
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:56,000
OK.

794
00:48:56,000 --> 00:49:03,000
Yeah, they did not lead the plan of the wife.

795
00:49:03,000 --> 00:49:09,000
No, I'm betting she braids her snatch hair.

796
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:13,000
Probably probably has like fucking dreadlocks.

797
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:15,000
To this day.

798
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:17,000
Yes.

799
00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:20,000
OK, we're going to go with Yoko.

800
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:23,000
Sound fair?

801
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:24,000
All right.

802
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:25,000
Next one.

803
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:30,000
OK, Derek.

804
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:32,000
Thanks for having the wives.

805
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:34,000
Let's go John Lennon.

806
00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:35,000
I have him on my list.

807
00:49:35,000 --> 00:49:36,000
I got to cross him off.

808
00:49:36,000 --> 00:49:39,000
Fuck.

809
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:46,000
OK, I got him against Hank Williams Jr.

810
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:50,000
Oh, damn.

811
00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:55,000
That's pretty close because if you take John Lennon at his hair,

812
00:49:55,000 --> 00:49:57,000
Hank Williams Jr.

813
00:49:57,000 --> 00:50:00,000
at his hair is pretty close.

814
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:04,000
Oh, yeah.

815
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,000
To me.

816
00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:07,000
Let's see.

817
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:11,000
OK, here's what I think right here.

818
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:15,000
OK, John Lennon was a hippie.

819
00:50:15,000 --> 00:50:19,000
He probably didn't bathe that often.

820
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,000
Hank Williams Jr. was a hick.

821
00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:24,000
He probably didn't bathe that often.

822
00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:29,000
So let's send that one to Topher because I don't know.

823
00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:31,000
I don't know on that one.

824
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:32,000
Topher.

825
00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:33,000
Topher.

826
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:38,000
OK, that one goes to Topher.

827
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:39,000
Let's hear your next one, Ron.

828
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:45,000
First one of season five.

829
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:48,000
The first standoff that Topher gets.

830
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:50,000
All right, cool.

831
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:53,000
All right, what is your next one?

832
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:58,000
OK, next up.

833
00:50:58,000 --> 00:51:05,000
The ex-universal champion of the world, Roman Reigns.

834
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:13,000
I have him against Jason Momoa.

835
00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:15,000
I'm sorry, I'm going to have to go with Momoa.

836
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,000
He's got a beard like right now.

837
00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:21,000
He's got a beard like down to his fucking elbows.

838
00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:31,000
It looks like he has back hair and the whole fucking gizmo, dude.

839
00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:35,000
Roman Reigns is a good one, but I think that in my opinion,

840
00:51:35,000 --> 00:51:42,000
I think that Jason Momoa beats him.

841
00:51:42,000 --> 00:51:47,000
What do you think?

842
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:48,000
I don't know.

843
00:51:48,000 --> 00:51:51,000
He's just going off the bat, he wears leather pants,

844
00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:54,000
he's got all the hair up top, why not?

845
00:51:54,000 --> 00:51:58,000
OK, maybe not on the chest, because he's got shirtless,

846
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:02,000
but from the pants waistline down.

847
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,000
Yeah, but he's also an athlete,

848
00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:08,000
so he would probably have to shave down there, don't you think?

849
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:09,000
Not necessarily.

850
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:10,000
OK.

851
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:12,000
You want that one to go to Topher, too?

852
00:52:12,000 --> 00:52:16,000
Actually, you know, I got thinking.

853
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:22,000
We mentioned that wrestlers got to wear jock straps and blah, blah, blah.

854
00:52:22,000 --> 00:52:25,000
Yeah, yeah, that's what I was referring to,

855
00:52:25,000 --> 00:52:27,000
that they have to probably be somewhat...

856
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:30,000
Well, jock straps aren't dumb, they will go up your butt.

857
00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:33,000
Yeah, but I mean, they're still really constrictive,

858
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:41,000
but want to send that one to Topher?

859
00:52:41,000 --> 00:52:44,000
No, actually, I think I'll give you that one.

860
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:47,000
OK. Yeah, I think he beats...

861
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:51,000
I think Momoa beats him out just a little bit, so...

862
00:52:51,000 --> 00:52:53,000
But you can always bring him back, so...

863
00:52:53,000 --> 00:53:05,000
Alrighty, so let's have your next one.

864
00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:07,000
Sorry, I started speeding.

865
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:10,000
That's OK.

866
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:13,000
That shit happens.

867
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:17,000
OK, here we go.

868
00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:21,000
Fred from Scooby-Doo.

869
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:30,000
Fidel Castro.

870
00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:32,000
Another one bringing back.

871
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:40,000
Yep. I'm saying Castro. You see that, Harry, son of a bitch?

872
00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:44,000
OK, here's where I'm at on Fred from Scooby-Doo.

873
00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:49,000
OK.

874
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:53,000
And yet to figure out why he wore that ascot.

875
00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:57,000
OK.

876
00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:02,000
I take it because they were so busy busting ghosts,

877
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:05,000
he didn't have time to bathe, so he put the ascot on

878
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:10,000
to keep the smell down in his clothes so nobody smelled it.

879
00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:11,000
OK.

880
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,000
He's supposed to be a pretty boy.

881
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:17,000
OK. Well, I think because he had blonde hair,

882
00:54:17,000 --> 00:54:19,000
he naturally didn't have that thick of hair,

883
00:54:19,000 --> 00:54:23,000
and it really was not that standoutish or prolific.

884
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:28,000
And Fidel Castro's down there in Cuba where it's really hot.

885
00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:33,000
So yeah, OK, so yeah, that would just be bathing practice.

886
00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:35,000
You're right. Yeah. You're right.

887
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:38,000
Yeah, so I'm going to say Fidel.

888
00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:39,000
All right, let's...

889
00:54:39,000 --> 00:54:42,000
I was trying to sneak a cartoon in on you.

890
00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:44,000
You know what? We'll have cartoons.

891
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:47,000
We already have cartoons in the contest, so...

892
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:50,000
Yeah.

893
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:56,000
All right, next one.

894
00:54:56,000 --> 00:55:01,000
Ryan Seacrest.

895
00:55:01,000 --> 00:55:03,000
Mila Omar.

896
00:55:03,000 --> 00:55:06,000
He is a member of the Taliban, or was,

897
00:55:06,000 --> 00:55:09,000
that was killed before Osama bin Laden.

898
00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:12,000
Real, real, real hairy guy.

899
00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:14,000
You can look him up on your phone if you want.

900
00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:20,000
Oh, yeah, I'll...

901
00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:22,000
Um...

902
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:28,000
I just figured Ryan Seacrest spends so much time on the air

903
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:31,000
that they keep him, quote, shaved up top.

904
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:34,000
Oh, I think they shave for him.

905
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:37,000
Never mind. Never mind.

906
00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:42,000
I think they shave a little heart pattern in his Netherlands.

907
00:55:42,000 --> 00:55:47,000
I don't even know how to spell that name. You just say it.

908
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:51,000
M-I-L-L-A, Omar, O-M-A-R. Just look it up.

909
00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:55,000
OK, I went, NOLA.

910
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:59,000
NOLA, Omar.

911
00:55:59,000 --> 00:56:02,000
Yeah, different guy. That's his brother.

912
00:56:02,000 --> 00:56:04,000
Oh, OK, OK.

913
00:56:04,000 --> 00:56:06,000
See what I'm saying now?

914
00:56:06,000 --> 00:56:09,000
Yeah, yeah, I see what... Yeah.

915
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:10,000
Yeah.

916
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:12,000
Oh, yeah, I ain't gonna go there.

917
00:56:12,000 --> 00:56:13,000
I gotta go, Mila.

918
00:56:13,000 --> 00:56:15,000
OK, next. Next, next, next.

919
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:19,000
OK, next one.

920
00:56:19,000 --> 00:56:21,000
Ray Cox.

921
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:25,000
Ooh, that's a really good one. I think he's gonna beat my guy.

922
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:26,000
Osama bin Laden.

923
00:56:26,000 --> 00:56:29,000
Osama bin Laden couldn't bend over.

924
00:56:29,000 --> 00:56:31,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

925
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:35,000
I chose Osama bin Laden because I already had a member of the Taliban,

926
00:56:35,000 --> 00:56:38,000
so I had to get the leader of Al-Qaeda.

927
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:44,000
And also, he was very hairy, but Red Fox could not move very well,

928
00:56:44,000 --> 00:56:49,000
and he was very hairy, so I gotta give that one to Red Fox.

929
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:53,000
And Osama had how many wives to do it for?

930
00:56:53,000 --> 00:56:58,000
Good point. Good point. All right.

931
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:00,000
Good job, Red.

932
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:07,000
Ha ha ha. OK. That one's pretty clear-cut to me. Red got it.

933
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:11,000
See? Osama wasn't meant to be around.

934
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:15,000
Nope, nope. Osama, you can go back to burning in hell.

935
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:17,000
Just kidding.

936
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:22,000
Anyhow, Osama bin Laden, you can go back to the afterlife.

937
00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:29,000
Thank you very much for participating, even though you hate us infidels.

938
00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:32,000
Go ahead, please, on the next one.

939
00:57:32,000 --> 00:57:35,000
OK, next.

940
00:57:35,000 --> 00:57:39,000
Freddy Fender.

941
00:57:39,000 --> 00:57:43,000
Freddy Fender? Oh my God.

942
00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:45,000
The whole country's shagging.

943
00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:58,000
Yeah. Well, I got him against Mean Joe Green.

944
00:57:58,000 --> 00:58:00,000
Um.

945
00:58:00,000 --> 00:58:07,000
Yeah. OK, so yeah, we're past the jockstrap, so.

946
00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:08,000
Yeah, yep.

947
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:11,000
Holy shit.

948
00:58:11,000 --> 00:58:15,000
That one's a good one. You want to send that one to Topher?

949
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:19,000
Topher. Welcome back, Topher.

950
00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:23,000
He's going to have his work cut out for him.

951
00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:28,000
All right, next one.

952
00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:31,000
Grapeape.

953
00:58:31,000 --> 00:58:33,000
That's a good one.

954
00:58:33,000 --> 00:58:39,000
Grapeape is going against Wolfman Jack.

955
00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:41,000
Oh, bring your model man back.

956
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:44,000
Yes, I am. He was a solid choice, Rob.

957
00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:54,000
I forgot who he lost to, but he was solid.

958
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:56,000
Gotta give it to Wolfman.

959
00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:59,000
Wolfman. Wolfman it is.

960
00:58:59,000 --> 00:59:00,000
All right, next one.

961
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:05,000
Grapeape was purple. You'd see the shit on his ass.

962
00:59:05,000 --> 00:59:06,000
Perfect.

963
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:09,000
I tried. I tried. I tried.

964
00:59:09,000 --> 00:59:15,000
Grapeape, he tried. I was here. I saw it.

965
00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:19,000
All right, next one.

966
00:59:19,000 --> 00:59:21,000
Michael Richards.

967
00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:24,000
Oh, that's a good one. I got him against Claudia.

968
00:59:24,000 --> 00:59:27,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

969
00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:33,000
Dude, it looked like he just stored an 8-ball come floating into Seinfeld.

970
00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:38,000
Yeah, yeah, yep, yep. That's a solid choice right there.

971
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:45,000
I have him against Claudio Sanchez, the lead singer of Kohit and Cambria.

972
00:59:45,000 --> 00:59:49,000
Just take a look at him.

973
00:59:49,000 --> 00:59:52,000
Claudio Sanchez.

974
00:59:52,000 --> 00:59:53,000
Because it's a pretty close one.

975
00:59:53,000 --> 00:59:59,000
One second. One second. One second.

976
00:59:59,000 --> 01:00:04,000
What, Google here?

977
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:06,000
I mean, it's a...

978
01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:09,000
Claudio.

979
01:00:09,000 --> 01:00:13,000
Oh, there he is.

980
01:00:13,000 --> 01:00:17,000
Oh, well.

981
01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:23,000
Pretty solid, isn't he?

982
01:00:23,000 --> 01:00:27,000
I really never cared for Michael Richards anyway.

983
01:00:27,000 --> 01:00:30,000
Okay, Claudio Sanchez it is.

984
01:00:30,000 --> 01:00:33,000
Yeah, I love you that much, isn't it? Oh my God.

985
01:00:33,000 --> 01:00:38,000
Oh, I know. He was the perfect candidate, dude.

986
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:43,000
All righty. What are we on now? What number?

987
01:00:43,000 --> 01:00:46,000
We're on number 14, our final.

988
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:56,000
Okay. I've got a few too that I can pop out here, so it depends on who you put up there.

989
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:58,000
I gotta get my...

990
01:00:58,000 --> 01:01:01,000
Go ahead.

991
01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:07,000
Well, I was going to say, actually, I got like three others in a hole.

992
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:08,000
I do too.

993
01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:10,000
Because we are a little later.

994
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:14,000
Yeah, me too. I saved them just in case.

995
01:01:14,000 --> 01:01:15,000
Yep.

996
01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:16,000
All right.

997
01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:19,000
Okay.

998
01:01:19,000 --> 01:01:26,000
The Godfather of Funkadelic himself, Mr. George Clinton.

999
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:32,000
Ooh. I'm going to put him against Dwayne Ullman.

1000
01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:37,000
I think the fucking Funkadelic wins.

1001
01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:43,000
He's a notorious, very stinky guy.

1002
01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:48,000
Dwayne Ullman's just dust. He's dust right now. He died in the 70s.

1003
01:01:48,000 --> 01:01:57,000
So, I'm going to say, George Clinton.

1004
01:01:57,000 --> 01:02:00,000
I'm going to say George.

1005
01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:04,000
All right. George Clinton, you may go forward. Dwayne Ullman, you can go back to eternal slumber.

1006
01:02:04,000 --> 01:02:11,000
Thank you for coming out of death to do us a solid and be on our contest.

1007
01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:13,000
Don't get on a bike.

1008
01:02:13,000 --> 01:02:17,000
We know what happened last time you were on a motorcycle. You died.

1009
01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:20,000
Anyhow, go ahead. Sorry.

1010
01:02:20,000 --> 01:02:22,000
That was the last one.

1011
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,000
All right. Okay.

1012
01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:29,000
Okay. Now.

1013
01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:33,000
We have a band to pick two.

1014
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:41,000
But, we're going to keep everybody going on the band until the finale.

1015
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:44,000
Because we only get one band.

1016
01:02:44,000 --> 01:02:49,000
All right. Who is your introduction to the band, Harry Off?

1017
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:53,000
Oh, no. No. We didn't say it. We didn't say it until the finale.

1018
01:02:53,000 --> 01:02:55,000
Oh, that's right. Okay.

1019
01:02:55,000 --> 01:02:56,000
All right.

1020
01:02:56,000 --> 01:02:57,000
Yeah.

1021
01:02:57,000 --> 01:02:58,000
Okay.

1022
01:02:58,000 --> 01:02:59,000
All right.

1023
01:02:59,000 --> 01:03:06,000
Yeah. That night, I tore one up, you tore one up, and we have a winner.

1024
01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:10,000
We only have one band, so why blow it early?

1025
01:03:10,000 --> 01:03:14,000
Exactly. All right. I got one. I got a really good choice, I think.

1026
01:03:14,000 --> 01:03:19,000
All right. Well, let's take our second break way late, and we're going to come back with some more stuff.

1027
01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:22,000
That sound good? You got time?

1028
01:03:22,000 --> 01:03:23,000
Yeah, I got time.

1029
01:03:23,000 --> 01:03:27,000
All righty. We'll be right back in a couple of minutes.

1030
01:03:27,000 --> 01:03:30,000
Now it's time for Pick Up Lines from a Loser.

1031
01:03:30,000 --> 01:03:37,000
Are you an appendix? I don't know who you are or what you do, but I feel like I should take you out.

1032
01:03:37,000 --> 01:03:46,000
Hey there, fuckstick. You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.

1033
01:03:46,000 --> 01:03:52,000
There's a small island in the South Pacific where people actually talk with eye movements.

1034
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:56,000
Have you ever wondered where something came about?

1035
01:03:56,000 --> 01:04:00,000
Have you ever looked at something and said, hey, I wonder what the origin of that is?

1036
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:07,000
Well, so have we. That's why we gave you The Origin of.

1037
01:04:07,000 --> 01:04:10,000
The Origin of Knee-High Soft Drinks.

1038
01:04:10,000 --> 01:04:19,000
Claude Hatcher overheard a route salesman enter the plant one day and describe the competitor's tall bottle as being knee-high.

1039
01:04:19,000 --> 01:04:28,000
Knee-high originated with the Cherokela Company in Columbus, Georgia by Claude A. Hatcher in 1912.

1040
01:04:28,000 --> 01:04:34,000
Yo mama's so fat, when she went out to the pier, people tried to board her.

1041
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:43,000
Somewhere in the heavens, your great-grandma Gertrude is crying because her little b-bo is listening to this film.

1042
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:53,000
Two dish bags of microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh. We offer you first world problems.

1043
01:04:53,000 --> 01:05:05,000
My 76-inch smart HDMI, triphonic, stereo TV. My remote won't work unless I'm right in front of it.

1044
01:05:05,000 --> 01:05:09,000
I can't believe it. This is bullshit.

1045
01:05:09,000 --> 01:05:17,000
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.

1046
01:05:17,000 --> 01:05:21,000
I envy everyone who hasn't met you.

1047
01:05:21,000 --> 01:05:25,000
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

1048
01:05:29,000 --> 01:05:40,000
If I was to speak into a megaphone backwards, would it then sound like a whisper? I may never know.

1049
01:05:40,000 --> 01:05:49,000
Two dish bags in a microphone invade your ear holes in...

1050
01:05:49,000 --> 01:05:52,000
Hey! Who took a dump in the cooler?

1051
01:05:57,000 --> 01:06:03,000
And that is the sound you hear when you enter the gates of hell, Rob. That sound right there.

1052
01:06:03,000 --> 01:06:07,000
Yes, yes, I know. Oh my god.

1053
01:06:07,000 --> 01:06:11,000
I've heard something close but not quite like that.

1054
01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:19,000
Yeah, I think not only is that the sound when you enter the gates of hell, but I think it's the sound that you keep hearing in the gates of hell.

1055
01:06:19,000 --> 01:06:23,000
I think it's the soundtrack to the gates of hell.

1056
01:06:23,000 --> 01:06:30,000
Alright, well, we did the socks thing, right? About boomers and everybody, right?

1057
01:06:30,000 --> 01:06:38,000
Well, now we're having foods that zeers are obsessed with, but boomers don't even know what the fuck it is, generally.

1058
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:42,000
That sound good? Yep.

1059
01:06:42,000 --> 01:06:57,000
Alright, the number one food that zeers and millennials love, and boomers and probably some Xers, and the greatest generation definitely, don't have any idea about.

1060
01:06:57,000 --> 01:07:01,000
The first one is acai bowls.

1061
01:07:01,000 --> 01:07:07,000
And if anyone's not familiar, it's a berry. It's acai berry.

1062
01:07:07,000 --> 01:07:14,000
And it's supposed to be really good, antioxidants and all this stuff.

1063
01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:17,000
Anyhow, it's kind of a reddish berry.

1064
01:07:17,000 --> 01:07:26,000
So, anyhow, I know about it only because I've been around it. You don't, so some Xers know about it, some don't.

1065
01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:34,000
The next one that we don't know about, but they do, is poke bowls.

1066
01:07:34,000 --> 01:07:38,000
And you know what poke bowls are? You know what poke is?

1067
01:07:38,000 --> 01:07:41,000
Yeah, I've heard of it, yeah.

1068
01:07:41,000 --> 01:07:48,000
Okay, well it is like chunks of fish mixed in with all kinds of other things.

1069
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:50,000
I mean, if you have any questions about it, Google it.

1070
01:07:50,000 --> 01:07:55,000
The question is, is it cooked or not? Is it sushi or?

1071
01:07:55,000 --> 01:08:00,000
You know what, that's a good question because I would never get near it.

1072
01:08:00,000 --> 01:08:05,000
So hang on, let me look. Yeah, it's sushi. Yeah, don't get near me.

1073
01:08:05,000 --> 01:08:13,000
Okay, let me see here. Let's see, is poke fish cooked?

1074
01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:15,000
Waa-waa.

1075
01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:17,000
Ha ha ha.

1076
01:08:17,000 --> 01:08:19,000
Ha ha ha.

1077
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:21,000
Waa-waa.

1078
01:08:21,000 --> 01:08:30,000
Raw pieces of tuna cut into cubes, then marinated with soy sauce and sesame oil and mixed with onion.

1079
01:08:30,000 --> 01:08:35,000
So tuna out of the can, so yeah, you'd be alright.

1080
01:08:35,000 --> 01:08:37,000
Okay, well alright.

1081
01:08:37,000 --> 01:08:39,000
Unless they're talking raw tuna.

1082
01:08:39,000 --> 01:08:44,000
Well it said that, it said raw pieces of tuna cut into cubes, then marinated.

1083
01:08:44,000 --> 01:08:46,000
Okay, well then you're talking sushi.

1084
01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:51,000
Yes, so okay. I'm glad we don't know about it.

1085
01:08:51,000 --> 01:08:58,000
But poke doesn't necessarily have to be tuna or even seafood, nor does it have to be raw or cubed.

1086
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,000
So, whatever the hell. We don't know about it.

1087
01:09:01,000 --> 01:09:06,000
Okay, so the next one is, yeah, moving right along.

1088
01:09:06,000 --> 01:09:11,000
Next one, avocado toast.

1089
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:13,000
Um, we've known about that.

1090
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:14,000
That sounds good to me.

1091
01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:20,000
It actually is good. I've had it. I've had it. It's good.

1092
01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:23,000
Um, yeah, um, okay, yeah.

1093
01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:28,000
We know about it and we like it, so I think that one is, uh, yeah.

1094
01:09:28,000 --> 01:09:34,000
Alright, next one, kombucha.

1095
01:09:34,000 --> 01:09:36,000
Oh, don't have to call you.

1096
01:09:36,000 --> 01:09:40,000
Oh, you know what, I could explain it, but I'm not gonna.

1097
01:09:40,000 --> 01:09:46,000
Um, I, I hate it. I hate the concept of it. Everything about it. It's nasty to me.

1098
01:09:46,000 --> 01:09:50,000
So we're gonna move right along from kombucha and it's like in jars.

1099
01:09:50,000 --> 01:09:55,000
But anyhow, uh, chai seed pudding.

1100
01:09:55,000 --> 01:10:00,000
And some people announce it chai. Some people call it kai.

1101
01:10:00,000 --> 01:10:05,000
But anyhow, however you pronounce it.

1102
01:10:05,000 --> 01:10:07,000
I've never tried it.

1103
01:10:07,000 --> 01:10:13,000
I don't know what the actual pronunciation of it is, but chai seed pudding.

1104
01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:17,000
And I know nothing about it. Do you?

1105
01:10:17,000 --> 01:10:24,000
No, I don't have a clue. I've heard, I've heard the name. I've never tried it. I know nothing about it.

1106
01:10:24,000 --> 01:10:25,000
Okay.

1107
01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:33,000
The next one that the youngers know about and we do not is edamame.

1108
01:10:33,000 --> 01:10:38,000
Edamame. Edamame is how it's pronounced.

1109
01:10:38,000 --> 01:10:42,000
And let me take a look here. This is weird.

1110
01:10:42,000 --> 01:10:48,000
What country did this come from? Cause it's not English.

1111
01:10:48,000 --> 01:10:51,000
Um, edamame is a Tuna.

1112
01:10:51,000 --> 01:10:52,000
Okay.

1113
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:58,000
Okay. Edamame is a Japanese dish prepared with immature soybeans in the pod.

1114
01:10:58,000 --> 01:11:02,000
The pods are boiled or steamed and may be served with salt or other condiments.

1115
01:11:02,000 --> 01:11:09,000
The dish has become popular across the world because it is rich in vitamins, dietary fiber, and is of flavor ends.

1116
01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:10,000
Okay.

1117
01:11:10,000 --> 01:11:14,000
So in other words, everybody's going to oriental food it sounds like.

1118
01:11:14,000 --> 01:11:17,000
It does sound like it. Yes. Asian food is like in it.

1119
01:11:17,000 --> 01:11:19,000
Yeah. Yeah.

1120
01:11:19,000 --> 01:11:24,000
The next one is exactly as it sounds. So just imagine this Rob.

1121
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:28,000
Rainbow bagels.

1122
01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:30,000
Rainbow bagels.

1123
01:11:30,000 --> 01:11:36,000
Yes. Rainbow bagels.

1124
01:11:36,000 --> 01:11:37,000
So yeah.

1125
01:11:37,000 --> 01:11:40,000
They're rainbow colored bagels.

1126
01:11:40,000 --> 01:11:44,000
I'm going to go ahead and pass on that one myself.

1127
01:11:44,000 --> 01:11:52,000
I just like a regular bagel. I don't need any type of a pattern in it or any type of a coloration.

1128
01:11:52,000 --> 01:11:56,000
I just like my bagels looking like bagels.

1129
01:11:56,000 --> 01:12:00,000
Okay. All right. The next one and I have had this and I do like it.

1130
01:12:00,000 --> 01:12:05,000
It's rather sweet and they do use it in some sweeteners that are low calorie sweeteners.

1131
01:12:05,000 --> 01:12:09,000
Jackfruit.

1132
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:13,000
I never tried it.

1133
01:12:13,000 --> 01:12:16,000
I think you would like it. I mean it's not like the best thing ever.

1134
01:12:16,000 --> 01:12:17,000
Is it a sweetener?

1135
01:12:17,000 --> 01:12:19,000
Yeah. It can be a sweetener.

1136
01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:20,000
Okay.

1137
01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:23,000
Yeah. All right. I think you'd like it.

1138
01:12:23,000 --> 01:12:25,000
Okay.

1139
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:28,000
The next one and I've had them before and they are pretty good.

1140
01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:30,000
Oat milk lattes.

1141
01:12:30,000 --> 01:12:34,000
It's a different consistency from milk. It's thicker.

1142
01:12:34,000 --> 01:12:35,000
No. No.

1143
01:12:35,000 --> 01:12:38,000
Okay. All right. That's cool.

1144
01:12:38,000 --> 01:12:40,000
My opinion. My opinion.

1145
01:12:40,000 --> 01:12:44,000
That's cool. That's cool. You can have your opinion. All right.

1146
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:48,000
Unless you add a bunch of milk to it.

1147
01:12:48,000 --> 01:12:51,000
Well you can. I mean that's what I do.

1148
01:12:51,000 --> 01:12:57,000
I mean I add vanilla and sometimes I'll put something like I don't know.

1149
01:12:57,000 --> 01:13:02,000
I tried a butterscotch one actually with vanilla and it was really good.

1150
01:13:02,000 --> 01:13:06,000
And I don't normally like butterscotch that well but I mean anyhow it's good.

1151
01:13:06,000 --> 01:13:10,000
I had it recommended at one of the coffee houses I go to.

1152
01:13:10,000 --> 01:13:11,000
Okay.

1153
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:12,000
Yeah.

1154
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:13,000
All right.

1155
01:13:13,000 --> 01:13:15,000
Yeah. Oat milk lattes are fine I think.

1156
01:13:15,000 --> 01:13:18,000
So okay. The next one is dragon fruit.

1157
01:13:18,000 --> 01:13:22,000
I don't know anything about it. I've heard of it a long time.

1158
01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:24,000
I don't know what it is.

1159
01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:28,000
I keep hearing a lot about it. I've heard about it a long time too.

1160
01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:29,000
Yeah.

1161
01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:33,000
Yeah. I have no idea what it is.

1162
01:13:33,000 --> 01:13:35,000
You don't either?

1163
01:13:35,000 --> 01:13:39,000
No. No. I've heard of it.

1164
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:41,000
I've never tried it.

1165
01:13:41,000 --> 01:13:45,000
Well I mean you know it's a fruit so I really don't have to look it up.

1166
01:13:45,000 --> 01:13:48,000
So anyhow so dragon fruit.

1167
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:51,000
Next one is kimchi.

1168
01:13:51,000 --> 01:13:58,000
Kimchi is a traditional Korean side dish consisting of salted and fermented vegetables.

1169
01:13:58,000 --> 01:14:03,000
And I think it has Napa cabbage in it maybe and Korean radish.

1170
01:14:03,000 --> 01:14:05,000
Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa.

1171
01:14:05,000 --> 01:14:07,000
Okay.

1172
01:14:07,000 --> 01:14:11,000
Salted and fermented vegetables?

1173
01:14:11,000 --> 01:14:13,000
Yes.

1174
01:14:13,000 --> 01:14:14,000
Shout me out.

1175
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:16,000
No I don't like it either. I'm just telling you what I know about it.

1176
01:14:16,000 --> 01:14:18,000
Just on the word for kimchi.

1177
01:14:18,000 --> 01:14:20,000
Let me go to kimchi here.

1178
01:14:20,000 --> 01:14:28,000
It's Korean I know that and it's got like Korean cabbage and Napa cabbage and fermented. Hang on.

1179
01:14:28,000 --> 01:14:35,000
Okay. Kimchi is a traditional Korean side dish consisting of salted and fermented vegetables.

1180
01:14:35,000 --> 01:14:50,000
Most often Napa cabbage and Korean radish and wide selection of seasoning is used including Girkachu, spring onions, garlic, ginger and a whole bunch of other shit.

1181
01:14:50,000 --> 01:14:53,000
So there you go. Okay. I don't like it myself.

1182
01:14:53,000 --> 01:14:59,000
I stand my ground and it says we're mixing in one part. That's all I need.

1183
01:14:59,000 --> 01:15:02,000
Me too. I agree 100% Rob.

1184
01:15:02,000 --> 01:15:07,000
Unless it contains the word alcohol.

1185
01:15:07,000 --> 01:15:11,000
That's the only fermented stuff I like too so we're on board with it.

1186
01:15:11,000 --> 01:15:12,000
Right right right.

1187
01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:16,000
Alright the next one is gluten free baked foods.

1188
01:15:16,000 --> 01:15:21,000
I have no problem with them. There's a lot of them that are good. It's not my main because gluten doesn't bother me.

1189
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:29,000
Honestly yeah. I really have a hard time telling the difference.

1190
01:15:29,000 --> 01:15:32,000
I can't tell you know.

1191
01:15:32,000 --> 01:15:38,000
No me too. I mean they got to tell me sometimes. Hey that's gluten free. I'm like no shit. Okay cool.

1192
01:15:38,000 --> 01:15:39,000
The next one.

1193
01:15:39,000 --> 01:15:42,000
Tastes good. Tastes good. Builds a hole.

1194
01:15:42,000 --> 01:15:44,000
Yeah there you go.

1195
01:15:44,000 --> 01:15:52,000
The next one is and we know about this. I don't know why it's on the list and even boomers and probably the greatest generation knows about this.

1196
01:15:52,000 --> 01:15:56,000
Food trucks.

1197
01:15:56,000 --> 01:16:00,000
Pretty safe to say everybody knows about food trucks.

1198
01:16:00,000 --> 01:16:06,000
Dude they are everywhere now. Even down here. There's tons of them down here.

1199
01:16:06,000 --> 01:16:12,000
It's all the rage. You pull up somewhere and serve a certain kind of food and everyone goes nuts.

1200
01:16:12,000 --> 01:16:27,000
Oh yeah we got one. It's a local fish restaurant. Seafood restaurant. They have a truck. There's different barbecue trucks. There's Mexican trucks. Yeah there's all kinds of them.

1201
01:16:27,000 --> 01:16:34,000
Oh they're all the rage and all different ages of people enjoy them. So I think they're wrong on this one.

1202
01:16:34,000 --> 01:16:40,000
The next one. Sriracha mayo. Haven't that been around for a while?

1203
01:16:40,000 --> 01:16:43,000
Sriracha? That's been around for a while.

1204
01:16:43,000 --> 01:16:55,000
Yeah that's what I thought too. So I think it kind of struck out on this one too. I guarantee you most of boomers, most all of Xers and maybe some of the greatest generation know about Sriracha mayo.

1205
01:16:55,000 --> 01:17:02,000
Okay well yeah. Yeah I mean it's on every grocery store shelf.

1206
01:17:02,000 --> 01:17:04,000
Yeah and I didn't.

1207
01:17:04,000 --> 01:17:10,000
The ketchup and the regular mayo. Yeah didn't it come out in the 90s maybe and it was like running back for a while.

1208
01:17:10,000 --> 01:17:16,000
Wasn't it Kraft that came out with it? Yeah probably. Yeah I remember.

1209
01:17:16,000 --> 01:17:19,000
I mean they were a big name at the time. Yeah.

1210
01:17:19,000 --> 01:17:33,000
Yeah and I think it went away. Now I think it's back if I remember correctly. And then finally on the list, Unicorn Food. I have no idea and I'm not even going to bother to look it up. So Rob you got anything you want to go into?

1211
01:17:33,000 --> 01:17:39,000
Yes something that will make your night. Oh good.

1212
01:17:39,000 --> 01:17:44,000
Gotcha it's American Songwriter.

1213
01:17:44,000 --> 01:17:47,000
Alright I'm ready.

1214
01:17:47,000 --> 01:17:50,000
And that actually this one's kind of an interesting one.

1215
01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:56,000
Rob you do love me like I say every time you play an American Songwriter list. Yeah.

1216
01:17:56,000 --> 01:18:00,000
Oh no that was that one time it was pretty lame.

1217
01:18:00,000 --> 01:18:04,000
Yeah but that's really not using. We both agree.

1218
01:18:04,000 --> 01:18:07,000
Yeah we both agree.

1219
01:18:07,000 --> 01:18:09,000
Yeah.

1220
01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:19,000
Four crazy internet rumors about musicians that were true.

1221
01:18:19,000 --> 01:18:23,000
Charles Manchin wrote a song from the Beach Boys.

1222
01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:25,000
Uh huh.

1223
01:18:25,000 --> 01:18:42,000
Never Learn Not To Love is one of the many top notch songs from legendary Beach Boys. The track is included as a beach side, Bluebirds Over The Mountain in 1968.

1224
01:18:42,000 --> 01:18:45,000
Okay.

1225
01:18:45,000 --> 01:18:55,000
You see I thought they denied him the song and he was pissed. But no that was a record producer that told him he couldn't. Okay. Alright that's cool.

1226
01:18:55,000 --> 01:18:57,000
I wanted to call him.

1227
01:18:57,000 --> 01:19:03,000
That's okay. That happens.

1228
01:19:03,000 --> 01:19:28,000
The songwriting critics go to Dennis Wilson that not many people know where Wilson came up with the song. Shockling the track is actually an edited version of the song Cease and Exist which is written by none other than cult leader and convicted murderer Charles Manchin.

1229
01:19:28,000 --> 01:19:31,000
Okay.

1230
01:19:31,000 --> 01:19:45,000
I knew he was a musician before he became a leader of serial killers or whatever you want to call it. Mass murderers or whatever. So yeah. Okay.

1231
01:19:45,000 --> 01:19:52,000
I had heard that he had written a song. I didn't know which one.

1232
01:19:52,000 --> 01:19:53,000
Well I mean.

1233
01:19:53,000 --> 01:19:58,000
This was the one but Dennis Wilson got credit for it.

1234
01:19:58,000 --> 01:20:02,000
Okay. Okay.

1235
01:20:02,000 --> 01:20:05,000
That's right it's a rumor but it's true.

1236
01:20:05,000 --> 01:20:11,000
Okay I did not know that. That's cool.

1237
01:20:11,000 --> 01:20:16,000
Oh this one I know for a fact you and I know. Okay.

1238
01:20:16,000 --> 01:20:20,000
Ozzy Osbourne snorted ants.

1239
01:20:20,000 --> 01:20:23,000
Yes we do know that.

1240
01:20:23,000 --> 01:20:28,000
We do know that.

1241
01:20:28,000 --> 01:20:33,000
Osbourne has done a lot of wild things in his heyday. Biting the head off like that was just one of many.

1242
01:20:33,000 --> 01:20:56,000
Though it's not the most well known incident according to Osbourne he also snorted a line of ants once. What was once just internet speculation attributed to allegedly Motley Crue ended up being verified by the Prince of Darkness himself.

1243
01:20:56,000 --> 01:21:03,000
Yep we knew that and we know that he confirmed it he said yeah I think that did happen. Yeah and the rest is history.

1244
01:21:03,000 --> 01:21:12,000
Yeah he came out on an episode of the Osbourne family's podcast and admitted to it.

1245
01:21:12,000 --> 01:21:16,000
Yes and I got another one that.

1246
01:21:16,000 --> 01:21:19,000
Okay here's this quote.

1247
01:21:19,000 --> 01:21:31,000
I did I was there I did it Osbourne said it's my nostril I was drunk and I did it.

1248
01:21:31,000 --> 01:21:55,000
And Nicky Six said that he was out grossing it you know out crazy in them so he took and he took a piss right there in front of him outside he jumped down and licked it up and he said you do that. So Nicky Six didn't want to be outdone so he pusses on the ground and he fucks and Ozzy pushes him aside and licks his piss too.

1249
01:21:55,000 --> 01:22:02,000
And about that time Nicky's like man he won he won.

1250
01:22:02,000 --> 01:22:09,000
That's how crazy and me anybody I'm like out at that point what about you.

1251
01:22:09,000 --> 01:22:12,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1252
01:22:12,000 --> 01:22:18,000
There's number three. Oh, okay.

1253
01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:26,000
Yeah, they brought him back to life kickstart my heart is about that.

1254
01:22:26,000 --> 01:22:37,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Nicky Six is known as one of the founding members of our career and he's had no shorts walk stories from the best peak yeah it goes on.

1255
01:22:37,000 --> 01:22:51,000
While on a drug binge back in 1986 separate and overdose. He was declared dead for about two minutes before a paramedic revived him with several shots of adrenaline.

1256
01:22:51,000 --> 01:23:00,000
The parents was confirmed the story and even said that the experience inspired kickstart my heart.

1257
01:23:00,000 --> 01:23:11,000
Also the paramedic really did save his life because everyone gave up on him and that paramedic said bullshit as a female I believe she said bullshit nobody dies in my ambulance.

1258
01:23:11,000 --> 01:23:18,000
And she brought him back to life. Everyone else already gave up they thought he was dead. And then Vince Neil got a call.

1259
01:23:18,000 --> 01:23:26,000
And, or no, Vince Neil called down there he said hey man, how's Nicky and they said oh he's gone. He goes what he's dead and go no he left.

1260
01:23:26,000 --> 01:23:34,000
He got up and did more heroin. He left the, he left the hospital and went and did more heroin. So Eddie out go ahead.

1261
01:23:34,000 --> 01:23:38,000
Oh shit.

1262
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:45,000
Okay, and finally.

1263
01:23:45,000 --> 01:23:48,000
Mama Cass.

1264
01:23:48,000 --> 01:23:56,000
Cass Elliott. And Keith Moon died in the same room.

1265
01:23:56,000 --> 01:23:59,000
That's bullshit isn't it.

1266
01:23:59,000 --> 01:24:00,000
It's true.

1267
01:24:00,000 --> 01:24:07,000
Mama's Apophis icon Cass Elliott died and ultimately death. Untimely death.

1268
01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:18,000
Some hurtful rumors have been circulated about her in the years since the entire house book was passed, most of which have been since been disproven.

1269
01:24:18,000 --> 01:24:23,000
However one rumor proved true.

1270
01:24:23,000 --> 01:24:35,000
Elliott and the Hoos, Keith Moon, passed away at the same age, a few years apart, in the exact same room.

1271
01:24:35,000 --> 01:24:44,000
The one the apartment was owned by songwriter Harry Nielsen. Oh hey I know that name.

1272
01:24:44,000 --> 01:24:55,000
Who had often ripped the space out to his fellow touring musicians. The apartment has since been sold.

1273
01:24:55,000 --> 01:24:56,000
Wow.

1274
01:24:56,000 --> 01:25:02,000
So yeah, Mama Cass and Keith Moon died in the same apartment.

1275
01:25:02,000 --> 01:25:03,000
Okay.

1276
01:25:03,000 --> 01:25:08,000
At the same age, just a few years apart.

1277
01:25:08,000 --> 01:25:13,000
Wow. Okay.

1278
01:25:13,000 --> 01:25:15,000
Hope you liked that one.

1279
01:25:15,000 --> 01:25:20,000
I did. I never believed that. I thought that was bullshit. Okay.

1280
01:25:20,000 --> 01:25:25,000
According to American songwriter that is true.

1281
01:25:25,000 --> 01:25:30,000
Excellent. Thanks.

1282
01:25:30,000 --> 01:25:33,000
You got another one don't you?

1283
01:25:33,000 --> 01:25:35,000
No there was only four.

1284
01:25:35,000 --> 01:25:41,000
Oh there was only four? Okay. Wow those were good. We knew a couple of them but that was really good. Thank you Rob.

1285
01:25:41,000 --> 01:25:43,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1286
01:25:43,000 --> 01:25:44,000
Alright.

1287
01:25:44,000 --> 01:25:47,000
The other two was interesting to find out.

1288
01:25:47,000 --> 01:25:52,000
It was. The Nicky 6-1 and the Ozzy Nicky 6-1 I kind of knew about already.

1289
01:25:52,000 --> 01:25:53,000
Yeah, yeah.

1290
01:25:53,000 --> 01:26:15,000
There's like these documentaries that I watched and some of the books that I read and that's where I got that thing about Nicky saying that you know Ozzy won the out crazy and he did that to him and they said like he was non-stop and that Sharon had to keep intervening and tell them that they couldn't be on the same tour bus because she said if you guys keep up one of you is not coming home.

1291
01:26:15,000 --> 01:26:17,000
You guys are going to be in a body bag.

1292
01:26:17,000 --> 01:26:23,000
So she had to constantly break them up because they love partying so much.

1293
01:26:23,000 --> 01:26:24,000
So.

1294
01:26:24,000 --> 01:26:25,000
I have to admit it.

1295
01:26:25,000 --> 01:26:26,000
Yep.

1296
01:26:26,000 --> 01:26:32,000
So alright you want to go ahead and put a bow on this bitch and wrap it up?

1297
01:26:32,000 --> 01:26:37,000
Yeah it's 930 mile long and it's going up to four. I'll take it better.

1298
01:26:37,000 --> 01:26:43,000
Alright Rob we will talk to you tomorrow night and thank you.

1299
01:26:43,000 --> 01:26:45,000
Hello Grandma Oak.

1300
01:26:45,000 --> 01:26:47,000
Why Jimmy? Hi Ricky.

1301
01:26:47,000 --> 01:26:48,000
Thank you.

1302
01:26:48,000 --> 01:26:59,000
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you Rob. Hello Grandma Opal. Hi Ricky. Hi Jimmy. Hi of all. Oh hi Jimmy first then hi Ricky. All of Dodge City Kansas. Thank you.

1303
01:26:59,000 --> 01:27:06,000
Ra-Ra and I got a story about Dodge City Kansas tomorrow. We didn't get to it.

1304
01:27:06,000 --> 01:27:07,000
So.

1305
01:27:07,000 --> 01:27:08,000
I can't wait to hear.

1306
01:27:08,000 --> 01:27:16,000
Yeah I mean it's topical it just happened so anyhow. Alright thank you assholes for listening. Goodnight assholes.

1307
01:27:16,000 --> 01:27:18,000
Goodnight assholes.

1308
01:27:18,000 --> 01:27:25,000
Oh no. Looks like the show's over kids. Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.

1309
01:27:25,000 --> 01:27:39,000
Fear not assholes. They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.