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And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.
If a tomato is a fruit, then does that mean ketchup is actually a jam?
Hmph. I may never know.
The Apocalypse just happened. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to go. But we can tell you what you can eat.
Okay, it's post-apocalypse and you're walking down the barren wasteland that used to be a city.
You find an old can of beans lying in the middle of the road, but you do not have a can opener.
What you do then is you find a patch of concrete, you rub the top of the can for five minutes, then you go to the middle of the can and squeeze it and it should pop right open.
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Two Deucebags and a Microphone. I'm Mark.
And I am Rob.
Thank you all for joining us tonight. I say tonight because we record this in the evening.
It's a beautiful evening in Kansas City. It's like, it was hot today. It was like 90, but there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of humidity and there's a good breeze.
I really enjoyed it outside. I'm not saying you're not going to sweat outside when you're out there, but I'm saying it's not suffocating like a typical July or August afternoon around here.
Not yet. That's coming in a couple of days I saw.
And it's coming for you guys too, Rob.
Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm bracing myself.
Yeah, yeah. You're working in a metal shop?
Not a lot of fun. Can you have much of a...
Oh, go ahead.
I'm cutting steel and they're using welders. Yeah, we produce heat.
Yes. And also, can you have much of a fan? Back when I used to weld in a shop, you couldn't have too much of a fan on you. It couldn't have too much airflow because it would blow your arc.
Yeah, so that's another problem with that.
Well, I count my blessings because I'm not out in that show anymore.
Oh, yeah.
I'm a years-out element.
I'll tell you what, I've been to plenty of...we call them primitive job sites where everything there...for some reason you had to put in the skeleton of the structural steel or the architectural metal or whatever.
What we had to do had to be married to the frame somehow of the building.
And that's a primitive job site and that is everything runs off generators, so there's no fan or no air. And it's 110 degrees outside.
And you're in Texas and the humidity is about, I don't know, 90 percent.
I've never sweat like that in my whole life. I sweat so much that I quit sweating. I thought I was having a heat stroke.
I just needed to drink more water. So, I mean, all my clothes just look like I wet myself.
It was...yeah. I do not miss that at all. So, anyhow.
All right. Well, I guess we'll go ahead and get this thing started here.
In the certain God loves this department, angels and trumpets to boot.
Are you ready for this? Yeah. Are you ready for this? All right.
I need to hear some angels and trumpets.
All right. Well, you're going to hear them. Crispy Cream has four new donut dot flavors.
Yeah. Yeah. I get a smile on you, won't it? Hell yeah. All right.
We're heading the right way. OK.
Crispy Cream is also doing a special that if you order anything, you can add them on for a dollar with any purchase.
You can pick between powdered and original glazed donut, tossed in powdered sugar.
Cinnamon and original glazed donut, tossed in cinnamon powder.
Sprinkled and original glazed donut, whole tossed in a rainbow candy sprinkle.
And finally, cookie crumb, which is a glazed donut whole tossed in cookie crumb topping and sprinkled in a sweet powder mix.
That right there is what I think.
There they are. Right there they are.
That came from the lair of Satan right there. That thing.
Yeah. But we were still hearing trumpets, though, because, you know, we don't we don't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yep.
So anyhow, sounds good to me.
So next up here, Rob, we have idiots throwing money at anything again.
This is not your dad's flip flops.
You know, that he's trying to play hacky sack with back in the day.
Well, this would be us actually, Rob.
The flip flops you tried to play hacky sack in, you end up tearing them up, right?
You know, just the cheap ones from Walmart. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Not the ones. Not not those. Not the ones your mom wore to go out and get the mail.
These are designer flip flops.
And Rob, you can go for a nice pair of Prada that will only run you a measly nine hundred and twenty five bucks.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Really?
Yeah. Hello. Instant instant interest. Right, Rob.
Yeah. Or you can get a Gianni Vito Rossi pair for nine hundred ninety five measly dollars.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So there were.
That's only one paycheck. Yeah. Yeah.
But you can but you can always go for the more affordable route with a Christian labroutine for only three hundred fifty dollars, Rob.
OK. Now we're getting there.
I have a better idea, Rob. Does your dad love bacon?
Every dad loves bacon. Right. OK.
Well, I mean, I know I know both our dads are past, but like I'm talking about us right now because Father's Day.
Right. So if your dad and I'm talking to everybody out there that has a father that's living, does your dad love bacon?
Of course, everybody's dad loves bacon. OK.
Well, you can go over to Wendy's and hopefully he didn't have his triple bypass yet.
That way he can go ahead and get that one last meal in before, you know, before he has to eat a little bit cleaner.
So you can have buy one, get one baconators all Father's Day weekend at Wendy's, Rob.
How about that? Oh, wow. Yep. Yep. I know where I'm going.
Oh, yeah. Me too. I'm going to take three and probably come back and get a couple of others.
So anyhow, other stuff department. Get new Internet service sucks.
Bad. The sole reason people don't switch more often is, you know, this is personal experience as I'm in currently switching Internet services.
And it just fucking blows. I'm telling you, the sole reason that people don't switch in Internet more.
They'll pay a higher price is because they don't want to go through this bullshit that I'm going through now.
And they everyone sends you this kit and they're like, oh, no, no big deal, man. Yeah. Yeah.
Couple of plugins. Right. Hit this button. Bam. There you go. Great Internet. No, never works like that.
So I get there and it's there's like 10 different pieces.
You got to connect this router to that and then the modem and then the modem has to be plugged in a certain area.
You have to have to have enough coaxial cable, which sucks because I didn't know that when I first ordered it.
Coaxial cable. If I heard the name coaxial cable, I would have said no immediately because that shit just gets in the way.
It's horrible. I mean, it's like, you know, coaxial, right?
It's a big round wire, basically, that I mean, it's just it looks horrible and you have to walk around it. You can trip over it really easy.
You have to try to tuck it in the corner or you have to staple it to the wall or something.
And I just so anyhow, so I got all that shit going on. So anyhow,
so I'm you know, I'm one step away from tethering all my 5G cell phone because I have tethering, right?
My 5G cell phone is as fast as anything, anything that I can get in the house or anywhere.
And so, I mean, I could actually tether it.
But the problem is when I leave no Internet service and there's people here, right?
Otherwise, I would just tether it. I mean, I think that's the way to go because unlimited plan.
It's 5G lightning quick. And I mean, it would work. I tried it on my computer. I tried it on the TVs.
It works. You could tether it on there if you wanted to. So anyhow, that's what I would do, but I can't.
So, you know, when I'm not at home, you know, you're not going to be able to get Internet. So that sucks.
So here's what I'm saying here. The neighbors 5G overlaps and mine overlaps into them.
My 5G home network goes three houses down one way and two houses the other way.
It's a strong enough connection to connect on. So what I'm saying is strike a deal with somebody.
So, hey, I can connect on your 5G. You give me a password and I'll come over and like, we'd eat for you or something.
It's a little barter system, right? I mean, I don't know why more people don't do it because the neighbors 5G is like spot on in my house.
I get four bars. I mean, it's not that much far different than my 5G going to their house.
So anyhow, but we just so happen to have a couple of new neighbors and I don't know them that well.
But, you know, maybe in time I'll go ask them. Who knows? Or maybe I'll just go ahead and suck it up
and put this coaxial cable down and be mad at it and be pissed off the whole time I have it
and then eventually get rid of it in a year because I'm sick of it. That's probably it, right Rob?
That's probably what's going to happen.
That's what's going to happen. We all know this. So anyhow, anyhow, I have a couple of tips.
All right. So, you know, tornado season has come and I mean, it's still around a little bit,
but it's not as vivid as it was a month ago, right? Well, here's a tip for tornado season, okay?
Every time you expect severe weather and you never know if one of those natives are going to pop down
and fucking smack you one, you know, just for the hell of it, okay? Put a hot dog in your pocket.
You know why, Rob? Why? The service dog will find you first.
You know what? Ta-da! That's a good idea. Yeah. That is. Yes. That's a good idea.
That service dog's going to be like, mm-hmm, people, hot dog, hot dog. I'm going this way.
I'm going to act like it's a person, but I'm going to go eat this hot dog.
So, so the search dog will find you first if you put a hot dog in your pocket.
Speaking of dogs. Wow. A work of genius, isn't it? And it's that simple. Yes, it is.
Speaking of dogs, ladies, if your boyfriend lives with you and he is not working,
make him sit on the porch until you get home from work.
Those are my public service announcements for the day. Rob, we turn to you.
All right, well, I'm going to start tonight out with another dumbass.
There are plenty of them. Yeah. Oh, is he going to get an ass-paddling?
Is this guy going to be on the ass-paddling? Ah, I'll let you decide.
Okay, well, yeah, go ahead and do it. And then there.
Okay, the moment seemed destined for internet fame.
A Michigan courtroom waited for the appearance of the defendant and a suspended driver's license case.
Then he appeared on screen while driving his car.
The shop judge asked, Mr. Harris, are you driving?
The oblivious man said, actually, I'm pulling you into my doctor's office.
Just give me one second. I'm parking right now.
Asked badly. No, he paddled his own ass. Agreed?
Yeah, Michigan live streamed its court hearings.
Judge Simpson's flabbergasted response to Corey Harris driving during his suspended license hearing became a viral sensation.
Harris, oh my God, response when he finally realized his mistake even became in him.
The judge wasn't adding it. He immediately revoked Harris' bail and ordered him to turn himself into county jail by 6 p.m. that day.
Some people felt sorry for Harris, who was trying to get to a doctor appointment.
But the Detroit metro area was notoriously poor public transit.
What's more, it emerged that Michigan originally issued a license suspension when Harris failed to pay child support, a practice that has votes divided.
It's a good way to get someone's attention when they owe child support, but if it keeps them from getting to work, how are they supposed to make money and pay child support?
That's an ongoing battle. I lived through it a few years myself.
Yeah, you know, I mean, really, how are they supposed to come up with money? That's true. I mean, yeah, you got to get back and forth to work.
Yeah, but they have the right to suspend your driver's license.
There's got to be. You want my money, let me get to work. Sometimes some places don't have public transit.
Well, today, OK, here's what I'm saying right here. And this may be an option.
It depends on how egregious the person is that does the crime.
Like if he's out getting fucked up every night and killing children with his car, then no.
But if this guy needs to get back and forth to work, we have cameras everywhere and we have the ability for a judge to watch them do anything.
Right. So quite simply, and the guy has to pay for it. He has to pay a fee for this. And that's just for being a stupid ass fee.
And to cover the costs of the judge watching the camera while you go to work and back.
So you are to turn that on and then you you know, you go to work and when you're at work, you turn it off.
So you have it something that we're whenever the car runs. And I'll explain what I'm saying here in a minute.
I had this happen to me in Westport a long time ago.
No, it's fine. OK. OK, so they can rig up something like that.
OK, so car starts, camera goes on.
Judge like Mr. Henderson. Yeah.
OK, go ahead and go in and start your route in home.
And then, you know, then he goes drive straight home. The judge is like, OK, he's been a good boy.
He went straight home. And I know this will work because this is back in the 90s.
OK, and I'm walking out of Buzzard Beach. OK.
And my car is way down there. You know, Westport, right?
My car is like almost on the plaza because it was so busy at night.
I had to walk literally about a half mile to get to Buzzard Beach.
So I'm walking to my car and this really hot chick goes, Hey, hey.
And I'm like, yeah. She goes, come here. I'm like, OK.
And I go over there and she goes, will you blow into this hose?
I need to get home. Yeah. Yeah.
And I'm like, oh, shit. I'm like, no, man. Fuck. No.
If you go and kill somebody, they're going to look on camera somewhere.
I mean, there were still there's cameras then they're going to or you're going to rat me out because you're in trouble.
No, I'm not doing it. I walked off.
I mean, and she was pretty damn hot, dude. And I'll tell you what, a lot of people would have done it.
A lot of a lot of men would have been like, hell yeah.
Hey, where are you going after this? You know, so anyhow.
Yeah, I just could not believe that.
But back the whole point is, is in the 90s, they had a car that you had to blow into a tube to make sure that you're not drunk.
So they could do this really easily with a camera and a judge or maybe not even a judge.
Yeah. You could have people appointed from the courthouse, a clerk, whatever.
And then they all take duty watching these people go to work.
I mean, I think there could be a reasonable solution like that.
What do you think, Rob?
Well, they could drop them to with a computer system.
That's that's a good point. Absolutely. Yeah. Yep.
And and and have it in the computer system to where these people are allowed to drive here and back to here.
And that's it. Yeah. That's a good point, Rob.
You probably wouldn't need a camera. That's a good point.
Go ahead. I'm sorry. Yeah. Yeah.
And then the computers did sound me along.
If they go too far out of bounds, I mean, you can understand stopping at the grocery store on the way home.
You know, but as long as it's within working hours, you know, they take the word something out.
Yeah. You know, it's even harder to get a hardship license with that.
No, I've heard that. I've known people that had to get that.
And it's really hard to get a hardship license.
And also, you know, they owe child support. So what are you supposed to do?
Then if you don't pay the child support because you can't get to work, you go to jail.
And then that the person is no good at all once they go to jail because they're not paying.
They're not paying for that kid.
The purpose is so the kid can have basic necessities and live a decent life.
That's why child support is there.
So why are they busy trying to take that away?
It's like they're too busy trying to do punishment over just doing the right thing.
That's the way I kind of see it.
I mean, maybe they're a little bit more involved in some situations, but I don't know.
I kind of see it like that.
The next step after that is jail.
Yeah, so most of them are going to behave.
Yeah, it's like jail or go to work every day and only work.
But then if you get driving off, get a driving off suspended, you're looking at jail there too.
So, you know.
Yeah. Yeah.
So I don't know.
To me, it just seems like in this my own personal opinion, I know there's people that go out there and kill families.
That's a whole different issue.
If someone needs to go to work to pay child support, I think we need to find a way that they can get to work that they can afford.
Because not everybody can Uber.
A friend of mine at work, he had his brother wreck his car or no, I think I think it's a cousin, but it doesn't matter.
Wreck his car and give it back to him and Uber into work every day while he tries to find a car is insane.
Because sometimes he has to pay 40 bucks because it's a peak hour when he gets off work.
Oh, yeah.
And I'm like, fuck. So you're taking a big chunk of your check and wiping your ass with it every day.
So, yeah, I was like, man.
So anyhow, I hope you can do what I said.
There's like there's a deal where you can borrow from your 401k and you pay yourself back 10 percent.
I suggested that.
Hopefully that works for him.
You know, and like I said, you know, you could go to a bank, but you're going to be paying them.
I don't know, at least seven or eight for a car.
Oh, you know, or something like that when you can be paying yourself 10 percent interest into your 401k plus what you borrowed.
That's a win win deal, I think.
So anyhow, but but OK, let's take our first break unless you have any more you want to add to that.
No, no, that's all I had on that.
OK, I think we pretty much covered everything we could think of. But like always.
Yeah, I think we did.
OK, like always, you have a different opinion or you think I'm full of shit or Rob's full of shit or both of us.
Do speak 66 at Yahoo dot com.
And when we come back, I'm going to touch on something that a friend of mine knows quite a bit about podcasting and radio.
And that's all I'm going to say.
I'm going to talk about what I've heard from people who have told me.
OK, and I was quite surprised by it.
So we'll be right back.
Next up, things over heard in this one has the top 10 spots on Billboard 100.
Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser.
Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, no, no, no.
Two dish bags and microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.
We offer you first world problems.
Oh, shit.
Look at that drive through line.
Surely would don't expect me to actually have to go in.
This sucks.
M.X. What the hell happened?
You were the generation of change.
You never wanted to be one of them.
At the feet. Spoke for you.
Hunk the man. Hunk the system.
What the hell happened?
The generation of angst.
The generation of noncompliance.
Is now buying a boat.
You're really fed up to kill someone who dangled a dollar near you.
Great job, Xers. Everything's ruined.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper.
It's strange insults from an alien.
Real hilarity.
You are just like a cloud. It's a beautiful day when you disappear.
Hi all. This is Chicago.
I am the most dangerous city in North America.
You can't touch me.
Oh yeah? This is Kansas City here. Hold my beer, bitch.
Introducing Rob Rad's new book.
How to Track Your Enemy by Seth.
That's right. Smell your enemy before they get you.
Order this gem now and get a free virtual tour of Rob's secret bunker in Camdenton, Missouri.
Also receive a free copy of his new book, How to Clean Raw Sewage for Food.
Two deuce bags and microphone. I'm Mark.
And I'm Rob.
I'm funny because of the oral surgery.
So contractually, he can't say anything.
But he said, I was telling him about the emails we get.
And he said that that is unusual to have that much audience participation.
He said that radio stations don't get that.
He was amazed. I was telling him about some of them.
I was like this one, this one, this one.
And people that regularly write.
He said that we're doing something right is what he said.
He said we're making people interested in what we're talking about and enthralling them, I guess.
And he was really impressed with it.
And I was like, wow, it really made me feel good.
Because the way he talks, he said hardly anyone gets emails.
He said, you know, he said a lot of radio shows, they come up with emails.
They just make them up.
And let me make this clear here.
Yeah, the Montrose ones.
Yeah, there's theater involved in that.
Or trying to be theater, yes.
But most of the emails are from someone that I don't think we know.
And he was really impressed with that.
And he said we're doing something right.
So what do you think, Rob?
Well, I'm glad to hear that we're doing something right.
Number one, it kind of makes me wonder if it's because we're like two regular Joe guys.
We work like everybody else and we're down to earth.
You know what?
That's a great point, Rob.
That is a great point.
And maybe that's it, we're very relatable even though I didn't really see it like that.
I think I'm a weird guy.
Maybe I'm not.
I don't know.
So yeah, I mean.
Hey, we all have our skeletons.
Yeah, well, mine's not even necessarily skeletons.
It's just I think I'm an odd guy.
I just do.
But I don't think or do things like a lot of people do the way I see it.
But if I'm that relatable, maybe I'm not.
Maybe I'm not that different than everybody else, I guess.
So yeah, we're doing something right.
And you're probably right.
There's probably a lot to that.
People hear what we're talking about.
They're like, yeah, OK, I get that.
And also another thing I think is and correct me if you think I'm wrong, but I think because we don't get too serious and we don't get too political and we try not to ruffle a lot of feathers
and we try just to have fun, I think there's a certain amount of that where people are like, you know what?
I like this.
I can see it.
I like it.
I relate to it.
And our numbers have been great for quite a while now.
So anyhow, yeah, yeah.
Thank you.
Each and everybody.
Yeah.
And thank you.
You know who you are.
If you even listen to our podcast, I asked him one time about it.
He's like, I didn't really get a chance to listen.
Like, OK, well, thanks for the advice.
And no, he's a good guy.
And I mean, I know why he doesn't listen to our podcast.
He has to oversee so many of them.
He doesn't care.
And I get it.
So anyhow, that's cool.
All right, Rob, how would you like free root beer floats for life?
Oh, God, that'd be a dream come true.
Well, you have to be 100 years old, but it can happen.
America's oldest fast food restaurant celebrates its 105th birthday with Grand
Fluencer, Batty Winkle, and a sweet deal for the greatest generation.
The greatest generation is, of course, the generation before the boomers.
And all of them would probably be late 90s or 100s, right?
OK, Batty Winkle is a grand influencer.
You know, a social influencer.
This is a grandma that is an influencer.
And she calls herself a grand influencer.
And she's got a lot of people reading her stuff.
She's pretty interesting.
And she is from the greatest generation.
June 10th, 2024, A&W restaurants, America's oldest franchise restaurant chain,
is celebrating its 105th birthday with a sweet new offering for America's
often overlooked greatest generation.
Starting this month, anyone 100 years or older will receive free root beer floats
for life.
I mean, that's cool.
I mean, I mean, someone could live to be 110.
They could get maybe 10 if they're eating, you know, if they can eat like that.
I don't know. They may be diabetic or I don't know.
No, diabetic people probably don't live that long.
Sorry, but it's probably true.
But OK, that's I think that's pretty good gimmick, but I think it's also cool.
On June 20, 2019, A&W co-founder Roy W. Allen opened his first.
Did I say 1919 or did I say 2019?
OK, it's not June 20.
Oh, I think OK, I think I did say I was going by June 20.
June 20, 1919, A&W co-founder Roy W. Allen opened his first root beer stand
in Lodi, California, during a homecoming celebration for World War I veterans.
Today, 105 years later, A&W continues to sell the same famous root beer
fresh made in restaurants around the world and their iconic root beer floats
in frosty glass mugs.
And wasn't that the best, Rob, the frosty glass mugs?
Didn't that just make it?
Oh my God, yes.
Oh, geez, I hear angels and trumpets.
That was nothing better.
Oh, I know.
And I need to find an A&W so I can get one of them.
I mean, just reading this and I'm like, man, I want one.
The brand also continues to support military veterans through its ongoing work
with disabled American veterans.
Dav, everyone knows that one, I'm pretty sure.
We love our fans of all ages, said Liz Basner, vice president of marketing
and innovation for A&W restaurants.
But there are around 108,000 centurions in the U.S. that brands overlook.
And I agree with her.
You know, like, you know what, Rob, you're in my generation.
From what I read, advertisers don't even go for us.
We already bought our houses and our cars, and they don't give a shit.
They're trying to get younger than us.
You see?
But I think that's a big mistake.
And let me put it like this, okay?
And I noticed this.
Car commercial, boat commercial, something of value that you're going to make payments on,
they use Classic Rock in their advertisement.
Why is that? Why is that?
Yes, they say they're trying to sell to a younger generation,
but I think there's something, too, always playing, I don't know, like CCR or something.
And the younger generation, they don't know who the hell CCR is.
That's just like if me and you were going to buy a car when we were younger, in our 20s,
and they played Glenn Miller.
We'd be like, what?
Yeah, we'd be like, what the fuck is that?
No, get that out of here.
I mean, we would even be cool with the Beatles, you know,
or Arthur Fiedler in the Boston Pops or something, right?
And you're like, what the hell?
I think there's something to it.
And I don't know why they would just come right out and say, we're not even targeting you guys.
But playing our music, per se, or maybe even the Boomers music.
I mean, really, that's not even really our music, X's music.
I mean, our music would have been more like, I don't know, Ozzy and Motley to Nirvana to Alice in Chains, right?
Because we grew up a little bit after.
I don't know.
I still consider stuff like CCR and foreign and sticks and all that.
I still love them.
I still consider them classic, though.
I do, too.
I love them.
I mean, and a lot of that prog rock that came out, you don't get.
I mean, they just don't do music like that anymore.
The hard rock that they did, the psychedelic rock, like what I consider Deep Purple to be, almost metal, but not quite.
You know, with the organ and the guitar.
I mean, that's stuff that will never be replicated or duplicated ever again.
Those are people with extreme talent coming up with this stuff.
And, you know, I don't know if the talent's even out there.
If the talent's out there, they're not playing our type of music anyhow, so it doesn't matter.
So, anyhow, this all originated from A&W Floats, and I think it's a pretty cool thing.
I think it's a good gesture.
Even though the people may only do it for three years, one year, four years, or maybe not even get one at all, I love the sentiment.
And also, it helps A&W look better, too.
So, anyhow, I think it's a great idea.
I commend A&W, and bravo.
Rob, we turn to you.
Okay. Have you been noticing any semicolon tattoos?
No.
People, well, it's starting to become a thing.
A semicolon?
Yeah, a semicolon.
Okay. I'm trying to figure out where this is going.
It's a tattoo that has gained popularity in recent years, but unlike other random or mystizing trends, this one has a serious meaning behind it.
And no, it's not just a mark of a really committed grammar nerd.
The semicolon tattoo represents mental health struggles and the importance of suicide prevention.
Okay.
They describe themselves as a movement dedicated to presenting hope and love to those who are struggling with depression, suicide addiction, and self-injury.
The project semicolon exists to encourage love and inspire.
The semicolon is used when an author could have chosen to end their sentence, but chose not to.
The author is you, and the sentence is your life.
Wow.
So, yeah, I have been noticing.
I'm going to start noticing.
Now that you said something, I'm going to start noticing.
I mean, I just got numb to tattoos because everybody's got them, and they all look a lot the same.
You know, there's a lot of really great tattooists out there.
They're the colors.
You know, I just got to where I don't really look at them anymore.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean.
Yeah, they're getting them in different spots, like on the wrist.
Here's one that has it on the side of the finger.
There's one that's got it on their ankle.
You know.
Uh-huh.
It's just a little full of cold.
Got a bunch of them on the wrist.
Well, I'm going to start looking for that.
That's cool to know.
Wow.
Is there any more to that article, or is that it?
Well, there's a lot more to it.
Let's see.
It's on Upworthy.
If anybody wants to read more about it, there's a lot more to read.
We just don't have time.
One of those things.
Yeah, yeah.
Gotcha.
Okay, thanks, Rob.
I will start noticing that.
I'm just bringing it to the attention.
That's cool.
Thank you.
Okay.
Missouri is trying to help teens get off the vape.
The vape pen, right?
In Missouri, more teens are vaping than adults smoking.
Do you know that?
I believe it.
I do, too.
Because everywhere you see, everywhere you see, kids are vaping.
And kids, I mean like teenagers, older teenagers, younger teenagers to young adults.
That whole demographic there.
I see them with a vape pen everywhere.
Missouri has a variety of helplines dedicated to helping teens with that habit if they choose to try to get off the vape pen,
which would probably be a good idea because I can tell you right now, they're no good and they're going to cause you problems coming up.
Here's what I want to know, okay?
Soon will parents be going to the corner store for some vape for their kids?
You know what I'm talking about?
The teen might have to write a note to the store attendant.
Yeah.
Yeah?
Kind of a reversal?
Yeah.
Yeah, you know, like I remember growing up in northeast Kansas City,
and the Safeway that was open down there off of St. John and I forgot, Spruce maybe, something like that.
There was a Safeway there.
Now it's like a Jehovah Witness Center or something.
But when me and my mom used to go to the Safeway there because I was in kindergarten, you know, half day I got home,
she's like, all right, we're going to go to the store.
So I would go to the store with her, and all the time I'd see like Danny down the block, his mom smoked or his dad smoked.
And he'd come in with a letter here and it would say something like,
I need a Pell Mel hard box, camel soft pack, no filter.
And then he had the money.
He'd give the guy the money and the guy would give him the cigarettes and the change, and he would take the stuff home to his parents.
You remember that?
Yep.
Yeah.
Well.
That happened everywhere back then.
You know, I mean, I mean, yeah, I could see that happening like, hey, you go down there, give me a vape.
So anyhow, it's just something to think about.
But, you know, anyhow, if you, you know, maybe you can run by and get a free float while you're getting there, you know, right?
You're probably nearing a hundred.
Yeah.
You go by and get a free float and then bring them their vape pen.
Yeah.
Be a nice little thing.
And then you can rub in how you got a free float and they had to pay for theirs or something.
Right.
Yeah.
But anyhow, seriously, you may go to this is what you can do.
The helplines and everything.
And here's what they are.
Just to really, you know, make this seriously.
If someone is trying to quit in Missouri, I don't know if anyone can do it.
I just know Missouri is doing this.
I don't know if you can be in Kansas and call.
I don't know how they would know, you know.
So, but seriously, you can go to my life, my quit dot com.
It's M-I-L-I-F-E-M-Y-Q-U-I-T dot com.
Text start by my quit to 36072.
So you text the phrase start my quit to 36072.
That's how you text them.
And you can call them too at 855-891-9988.
You know, here's another thing too, Rob.
Okay.
They just did cigarettes.
How many people do you know are age or a little bit older or a little bit younger?
They smoke pot, but they do not touch cigarettes.
I would say eight out of ten adults I know are age.
They smoke pot, but they don't smoke cigarettes.
I would like to know that ratio.
I would love to know that ratio because I personally think that the numbers would be a lot more if not over.
I think that there's more adults smoking pot than kids vaping.
Because practically everybody I know does.
So and now with dispensaries in Missouri, I mean, the dispensaries, every time I go by them, they're a pack full.
People everywhere and they're getting all kinds of stuff and everything.
Not everybody has a medical card either.
The only reason now you get a medical card in Missouri is you get front of the line and you get the best weed.
So, um...
Well, now they also have the people that never smoked it because it was illegal.
Now that it's legal, it gives them the right to do it.
So now they're doing it.
Man, that's a great point, Rob.
Yeah, I mean, it brought people out of the closet on that.
You know what? That is a fantastic...
Wow. You just brought something up I did not even think about.
There's a lot of people who are like, you know what, now that I can...
I know quite a few people that never smoked because it was illegal.
Now it's legal. Hell yeah, now they're potheads.
That's funny.
I guess there's more people now that smoke it or are of age.
The only thing is you have to find out exactly where your company stands on that.
Right, right.
Yeah, because being in your line of work, they have time sensitive tests.
Let's say you cut your finger off, right?
If you smoked pot a week ago, that's not going to go against you.
But if you smoke pot the morning of you cutting your finger off,
they're going to deny you medical coverage and you'll probably get fired.
Right.
Because I know people that's happened to.
That's something that people need to realize is, yeah, you can smoke pot.
And some companies still have a hard line on it.
And some of them are like, we don't care what you do, just don't come in impaired.
Be the same as drink.
Right, right.
So anyhow, know where your company stands before you go out and get that weed is what I'm saying.
So Rob, you got something?
Very good point.
Let's take our second break.
We're going to come back with something you want to talk about, Rob.
That sound cool?
Alright, sounds good.
Okay.
Do you have any douche bags in a microphone, raw and uncensored?
See behind the smoke show.
Watch as the douche bags get stung by a scorpion beast.
Enjoy one of these...
Please remember to go to Cole's dressing room, wait five minutes and scream,
Hey, there's no toilet paper in here.
I'm not the mad shit.
Right now and get both high quality DVD sets and a free douche bag calendar.
Mark off the day with a douche bag looking at you.
You're limited so act now.
They used to call it jump-o-leave until your mama got on it.
Hey look, I think we found land.
Oh my God, I think we're safe.
Oh no, it's the island of horrible jokes.
I'm going to get you all right.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In the snow bank.
Hey there, fuckstick.
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.
A man in Colorado is recovering nicely after being bit by a rat that was hiding in his toilet.
Now, from his underground bunker camped in Missouri,
stocked full of dried guts, canned food, and a couple of vibrating...
toys is ramblings of a madman featuring Rob Rant.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong office.
Two douche bags and a microphone, I'm Mark.
And I'm Rob.
Like promised, before we went to break, we turned to Rob for the next story.
All right, well I'm going to kick this one off.
By going into something I was talking to you after we got off the air last night,
something I ran across and you said I had to get details.
Yeah, yes, yes. Good, I'm glad you did.
I got details and I think I might be going.
Okay, I keep forgetting, we do have a couple other music venues down here.
Well, I don't remember them until I see them pop up on my phone
and different people coming.
Well, last night I had one pop up.
Okay, what just happened to my phone?
Oh shit.
Don't you hate it when that happens?
Oh, I got, it just went black.
I don't know what the hell happened.
Oh, I got, yeah.
Is it charged? Okay.
We have a music venue down at Bangle Dam here at Lake of the Oaks.
It's called the On-Core Lakeside Grill and Sky Bar in Lake Ozark, Missouri.
It's on Bangle Dam.
How new is that?
I'm not positive, but I'm thinking they've only been there like maybe two, three, four years.
That's why.
I don't ever remember that place at all and it's perplexing me.
I'm like, what? That's why.
I haven't been there three or four years at least.
They get a lot of big names there and boy do they have a big name coming.
You know why they do, don't you, Rob?
All the money that goes there, all the money that goes there and the demographic that goes there.
So go ahead.
Right. And wait until you hear what date it is.
Okay.
Wednesday, July 3rd at 10 p.m. at the On-Core Lakeside Grill and Sky Bar, Molly Hatchett.
Oh yeah.
What is the date on that?
Because I'm going to draw a line of some sorts here.
Go ahead.
It's Wednesday, July 3rd.
No? Okay.
All right.
They are coming by the Midwest at least two times.
I wonder if it's like a retirement tour or something because they're playing in Sedalia September 7th or 6th.
The Mozart Fest that I'm going to.
Okay.
The Sunday night I'm going, I want to see Glenn Hughes do the purple stuff, the deep purple stuff.
But the last three bands are Head East, Glenn Hughes and Starship.
The first night, Molly Hatchett is the keynote band, the finale.
And the second one is like country stuff.
So it's a pretty solid festival.
But I thought maybe they're going to go to Sedalia and then drive an hour and a half down to the lake and do a show there.
But no, September and July, they must be on a big tour.
Yes, they are. The day before Independence Day.
Oh, I'm off that day.
And here's where I found tickets.
Okay.
I found them on ticketweb.com.
And dude, yeah, this is what's gotten me one.
Go.
On ticketweb.com, I'm finding general admission tickets for $25.
Oh, to see an iconic band like Molly Hatchett.
Wow. Okay. You know what? I may be joining you there, Rob.
I'll let you know more.
General admission, $25.
Man, that's, yeah. I always love Molly Hatchett.
To me, they were like Leonard Skinner on steroids.
They're so good.
Cool. Do you know anything about the band members?
You know what? I'll look it up later.
I'll look it up later because I'm pretty sure they don't have every band member they used to.
No band does, really.
Okay. I think it's this website I'm on that's kicking me out because my phone just did it again.
Oh. Is there another band playing? You said they got a good lineup.
Is there more coming than Molly Hatchett's really solid?
I don't know. I just went in to find out about Molly Hatchett.
I'll go in and see what else I can find.
A little bit later on. Oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. What?
Openers are Christina, which she's a local artist.
Okay. Oh, cool.
And Fat Mike and the Bartenders. They're local.
I think any band named Fat Mike and the Bartenders is going to be entertaining.
Yeah. Well, it's spelled P-H-A-T.
Oh, that kind of fat. Okay. All right.
The dude may very well be skinny then. It's kind of like a guy named Tiny.
They are a very good band. I've seen them around here many, many times.
Oh, cool. Yeah, Fat like that is, the guy's probably skinny.
It's just like if anyone goes, hey, you got to meet my friend Tiny, the guy's huge.
Right. They don't ever go, hey, here's Tiny. And this little guy comes over, hey, I'm Tiny.
And they're going, hey, man, you got to meet Tiny. And then he comes in and he's like, hey, what's up?
And he's like, shit, they call you Tiny? So anyhow.
Cool. I'm going to look at that venue. It's the Skybar. Is that what it's called?
I'm going to do it later.
The On Tour Lakeside Grill and Skybar.
Okay. All I got to do is put in Ozarks Grill and Skybar and I can come up with it. That's all I need to know.
I can do a search and find the website.
The On Tour.
The On Tour. Okay. I can do all that. I'll remember it though now.
So, okay, cool. Is there anything else?
No, that's all on that. Actually, you can probably, I found it on Google.
Okay.
All right. That's how I found that website.
I can go anywhere and buy tickets.
Or you probably use TimeTap, the On Tour themselves.
I'll tell you one reason they're not as expensive is they don't use Ticketmaster or Live Nation.
They probably don't have those absorbent fees that Ticketmaster and Live Nation give you.
And that's why. Because like the WASS show that I'm going to go see in Wichita in December,
their tickets aren't that expensive either. They're not 25, but I mean they're just a little bit over that.
And the reason is because that venue doesn't use Ticketmaster or Live Nation.
The Mozart Festival is really affordable, but I got VIP tickets because Val can't stand that long because of her back.
So I needed a little bit more room, not so many people piled in. So I had to get VIP.
But General Mission for like the iconic Glenn Hughes, Starship,
which still has some of the original members and Head East to I don't know who all's in it, you know.
But those three bands for 25 bucks plus two more, a couple other bands.
I think one is like a cover band for somebody. I couldn't remember.
It's kind of like Elton Dan around here, you know, or Almost Kiss or something.
But anyhow, it's a really stellar lineup for 25 bucks. And that's because you don't go through Ticketmaster.
So yeah, anyhow, I got a completely different story here, Rob.
I've been trying to get to it for a couple of weeks now.
So I'm just going to throw it in now because today was so busy with everything I had to do.
I didn't get to do much homework. I didn't get to do much of the first third.
Nothing. That's how come it was so short is I didn't get to write it all that I wanted to.
But anyhow, I'll save it for next time.
Trader Joe's mini canvas tote is the latest item to cause a stir on social media.
So much so that the resellers are taking advantage of the hype.
The mini totes are offered in four colors, blue, red, green and yellow.
And when I say mini totes, I mean they're mini. They're small.
And they are all in high demand. The bags retailing for $2.99 originally
are now advertised on platforms like eBay and Facebook Marketplace for many times the original price.
Offers from third party sellers range significantly from
but as of Wednesday listings ranged about $20 for a single bag to as high as $999 for a set of four.
$999. People want those totes that they could have got for $2.99
if they would have just got off their lazy ass and got there first.
They're going to pay for four of them $999. $1,000 for four of them.
And they're little cheap pieces of crap as far as I could tell.
I mean they're little bitty totes.
Videos shared on social media show crowds of customers visiting Trader Joe's stores
hoping to get their bands on their hands on one of the highly coveted mini totes.
Beyond the checkout line, TikTokers have gained tens of thousands of views
for sharing and customizing their bags with detail paint, buttons and embroidery.
That is why. That's why right there.
Is because people are doing special things with them and they want to be the in crowd.
They want to do that, right? They're like, oh yeah, hey look, I got this tote bag
and I'm putting fake emeralds on it and a smiley, you know what I mean?
Stuff that we wouldn't give a shit about basically, right?
Yeah.
Hey Al, Rob, you got something?
Have you ever, okay, Joey Chestnut has become an unquestioned face
of the national Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest over the past several years.
Uh huh.
Do you know the contest?
Yes, and I also know, no, go ahead, yeah, yeah, go ahead.
Okay, but he will not be permitted to take part in the event this year.
Steve Kozo of the New York Post reported on Tuesday that Chestnut has been banned
from participating in the 2024 Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest
because of the 40 year old's recent decision to sign an endorsement deal
with vegan brand Impossible Foods.
Yeah, that's what I wanted to get to. That's bullshit.
Yeah.
Anyhow, go ahead. Yeah.
A representative for Major League Eating, which runs the Nathan's Contest,
said organizers did everything they could to have Chestnut compete in the event
this year and try for a 17th victory.
Chestnut was paid $200,000 to compete in the Hot Dog Eating Contest last year.
MLE had agreed to allow him to compete in a rival competition on Labor Day
that will be taped on Netflix as long as no hot dog brand was mentioned.
Yeah, I mean, I don't know why they can't do the same deal on this one, the Nathan's one.
I don't understand that either.
The Kabosher or whatever his name is, I forgot, Yamaoshi or whatever, the one that just retired,
he was the champ too.
I think they want a new set of faces.
You think?
Well, the thing is, he signed with a vegan company though.
Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything.
I guess they do make vegan hot dogs, don't they?
I think it's a brilliant ploy from the vegan company.
Here's this massive meat eater that wins all these tournaments by eating this processed meat
and a lot of it, and they're like, hey, look, this guy's supporting our vegan hot dogs.
It's brilliant, but I just don't know why Nathan's has such a big problem with it.
They're not really competition.
The people that are eating Nathan's hot dogs are not worried about the vegan hot dogs.
Agreed?
Agreed.
But that very well could be why they allowed him to compete in another competition.
He just cannot compete in the big one.
Yeah, it's just my own opinion.
It sounds like you don't have a problem with it.
You'd think like maybe they're...
And that one's going to be taped on Netflix.
Yes, I did see that.
You'd like it.
I mean, like I always said, man, a starving African country explained to them
pelting someone with hot dogs at a ballgame.
Someone eating hot dogs so much, this gluttony, and we're cheering them on.
Here, eat some more, eat some more.
Wouldn't you feel like you've been ripped off in life?
Wouldn't you be mad at us?
But you guys are just like throwing these hot dogs everywhere and we're fucking starving.
I mean, I don't know.
I just think this gluttony thing, I've never cared for it.
I've never considered him an athlete.
I don't know.
Maybe it's because I always got to constantly watch my weight.
I mean, I'm down now, thank God.
But I mean, I always got to watch my weight.
And maybe something subliminal in there, and that's why gluttony, I don't know,
pisses me off so bad when I see it, because I see something of myself.
You know?
Right.
Yeah.
So anyhow, oh well, whatever.
You know what?
It's their ballgame, and they're playing the rules how they want to, so that's the way it is.
So, interesting.
Hmm.
Um.
Yep.
I had no idea about the vegan company I knew about, but I didn't know that they were going to let him go in another contest.
I thought they pretty much banned him for life or something.
So that's good to know.
No.
Yeah.
They agreed to allow him to compete in a rival competition on Labor Day.
Okay.
Well, while we're on the subject of food, um.
Right.
Oh, go ahead.
What?
No, I'm done.
Oh, okay.
While we're on the subject of food, there's a huge thing going on on the internet.
People argue.
Does McDonald's deep fry their bacon or not?
So the official answer that came over the wire the other day from a spokesperson for McDonald's is this right here, allegedly and all that stuff from what I read.
So, um, okay.
They typically do not deep fry their bacon.
Unless they have a huge rush and they can't satisfy the amount of bacon in the time that they needed to keep people going through the drive-thru and, you know, and going through the restaurant.
That's the only time they will deep fry bacon.
Other than that, it is done on the grill like it's supposed to be.
So if you give a shit about that, there you go.
So.
I was thinking they microwaved it.
I bet you that does happen, but they didn't mention it in the article.
Right.
Well, yeah, they're not going to admit to that.
Yeah.
Yep.
So, yeah.
Anyhow, let's see here.
I'm trying to find something.
You got something you want to go into, Rob?
I'm looking through my stuff here.
Yeah, I got another one here.
Okay.
The Missouri Department of Transportation is phasing out its Adopt-a-Highway program.
Really?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
A spokesperson for MoDOT said as they phase out the AAH program, the department will introduce a new Keeping Missouri Beautiful program focused on one-time group cleanup events coordinated by district officers.
Oh, like they do rescue Blue River.
The Blue River gets this rescue operation, I think, in the spring and fall.
That's a group you can sign up.
I've heard about that.
Yeah, it works really well.
I can't do it because I'm so allergic to poison ivy and oak.
But other than that, I would do it.
Well, actually, they have programs like that down here on the Lake T.
They need to, the way people leave it.
The Lake Wobble is down.
People will walk the shoreline and pick up trash.
That's cool.
That's floated in and stuff, you know.
Wow.
Okay.
That's cool.
Yeah.
That operation.
I think that new program might work.
You know, it works pretty well.
I mean, of course, it gets littered because you know how the Blue River runs.
It's the only river around that runs from the south to the north.
And that's because it drains into the Missouri River and it's the divide of land there.
And that's why it does that.
So from that, you get all of the city because it comes in from the south, you get all the city to the Missouri River, some inner city, some suburb, suburban type of places.
And then it comes from Kansas.
Okay.
So you get all of that trash that goes in.
And then when it starts hitting the industrial areas and stuff like that, it gets caught up around there really bad.
So people go there and they clean it all up and it works pretty good.
So you know what?
That might be a good idea.
So because I do see that there are some businesses that sponsor and you always see trash there.
They can't have someone out there cleaning it.
They just wanted to get their name on that sign.
Free advertisement, in my opinion.
That's what it looked like.
So yeah, I bet you there's a lot of that and that that is why they do that.
So okay, I like that idea a lot.
I do too.
Okay.
And actually it might be safer going out and picking up trash in numbers.
I agree.
Instead of having a young couple and a couple kids out there running up and down the road.
No, that's true.
Yeah.
Well, cool.
I've got an article here.
Are you ready for me to go?
Okay.
Almost four in 10 managers avoid hiring recent college graduates because they judge them to be unprepared for professional life.
According to a December 2023 survey of 800 U.S. directors and executives involved in filing filling open jobs,
one in five employers say a recent college graduate brought a parent to the job interview.
Wow.
That's interesting.
Twenty one percent of employers surveyed said they had a candidate refuse to turn their camera on for a virtual interview.
Employers also complained that the interviewees struggled to make eye contact, dressed inappropriately and use inappropriate language.
The results of the survey don't come as a complete surprise to Michael Connors, an accounting and technology recruiter in the Washington area who prepares recent college graduates for job interviews.
At the end of the day, there seems to be a lack of seriousness, he said.
Do they even want this job or do they just go through the motions?
And working with younger people now, I would say that a lot of them just don't care.
They're like, you know, I'm just going to, they're what you call a quiet quitter.
Have you heard that phrase, Rob?
No, I haven't.
A quiet quitter is someone that's going to keep his job as long as he can by doing nothing.
It's quiet quitting.
They're like, they have this mindset that they don't care when they get fired,
but they're going to make the place fire them by them just not doing anything they're supposed to do.
Right.
And I've worked with some of the younger people, not all of them, but some of them are quiet quitters.
And, and, and a lot of them don't, they don't try to even hide it.
They're just like, yeah, I'm just here for a paycheck.
Yeah, yeah.
And they're like, no, I'm not going to, I'm not going to go do that.
I just don't think I want to, you know, stuff like that.
It's like what?
Stuff that would baffle you and me, Rob.
You've got, you've got them everywhere you go.
Yeah.
So yeah, anyhow.
And anyhow, let's see here.
I'm not going to go into that.
There's a big hubbub about micro cheating at work.
And I don't, I, I don't know if I want to go into that.
It's a big old ball of wax, but anyhow, micro cheating is basically like this.
You and someone, most, mostly male and female, it could be two males or two females, whatever,
whatever your sexual orientation is.
But let's say it's a male and a female, right?
And they're working really close together for a long time.
And they adapt a kind of a, a relationship, like kind of like you and your wife do, only
hopefully it's professional.
Well, micro cheating is where, like a work husband or a workplace.
Yes.
And the reason they call it micro cheating is, is because number one, you talk to them
after work, personal, send in texts and stuff.
This is considered micro cheating.
Not anything work wise, like, Hey, did you turn in that report?
I forgot to, or nothing like that.
It's just like, Hey, what are you having for dinner?
Okay.
That, and also getting them coffee in the morning, buying their coffee, buying their
donuts, uh, leaving little trinkets on their desk, little figurine, you know what I mean?
That is all considered.
There is mind you don't throw.
Yes.
And so that is considered micro cheating where you're not actually cheating, but your mindset
is with that other person to a degree, right?
Okay.
Yeah.
Yes.
And they're saying that micro cheating is bad and a lot of people do it and it hurts
relationships because you don't give that person that other, your wife or whatever,
your spouse or whatever, the attention that you used to give them because your attention
is divided with this person at work.
You may not be having sex with them, but you're having like intimate thoughts with it.
You know what I mean?
The closeness.
So part of the time you can, you, you can talk about things you can't talk to other
people about.
Exactly.
Yeah.
I, I see.
All of this is under the micro cheating umbrella.
I said, I wasn't going to get into it and here, here we are getting into it.
So, um, I do think that there is some validity to that and I think yes, I think if anything
robs you from your, uh, from your closeness with your spouse by giving them affection is
bad.
And it's probably not what you need to do.
I mean, is it really, really wrong?
I don't know, but I don't think that it's good for a relationship at all.
So, I mean, I don't know.
What do you think Rob?
No, it would not.
It would not be good for your way to work.
Yeah.
And for instance, for instance, let's, let's say this, okay.
Someone like, uh, man, boring night, man, just sitting here in my underwear watching
TV.
And you send that to your work wife in parentheses.
Okay.
And she's used to stuff like that.
You guys make humor like at work.
Your spouse sees that.
Would that fly?
Probably not.
That would, that would piss her or him off.
I've never been in a relationship.
Same here, but you do it because you have that kind of a bond with that person.
So anyhow, that's a form of micro cheating, you see, and it can be very dangerous too.
Because like I said, you send them a little text like that.
And then let's say, uh, also it goes, bling.
And your wife just happens to look over and you know how it first says the sentence before
it goes away.
And then you got to go find it.
Yeah.
I can see that.
Like, yeah, I'm sitting here scratching my pussy.
Whatever.
I'm not gonna lie.
It may be a joke to you too, but you know, will your wife appreciate that?
No.
So anyhow, all right.
Um, I think we can wind this thing down now.
I think we scratched together a podcast, even though I was very unprepared.
What about you, Rob?
You got anything?
Uh, no, I can find all I have for tonight, bro.
All right, brother.
Again, thank you for joining me and oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Hi, Opal.
Yep.
Hi, Jimmy.
Hi, Ricky.
Dodge City, Kansas.
Love you guys.
Hi, grandma.
Hi, Jimmy.
Hi, Ricky.
Dodge City, Kansas.
Ra-Ra.
Love you guys.
Oh no.
Looks like you showed up, kids.
All right, everybody.
Thank you for listening.
Good night, assholes.
Fear not, assholes.
They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.