And now it's time for the Daily Dish Mania.
The Daily Deuce Bag Pledge.
Here at Two Deuce Bags and a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.
Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.
Not like all those other guys, we can and will lie if it makes the story better.
Two Deuce Bags and a Microphone.
We Talk.
Jesus.
And now, Deep Thoughts with Mark.
Hmm. A padlock is turning a door into a wall.
Yeah.
Two Deuce Bags and a Microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh. We offer you first world problems.
Oh shit! Look at that drive-thru line.
Surely they don't expect me to actually have to go in.
This sucks.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee-slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.
You have the personality of a soggy newspaper.
Tomorrow morning while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte, remember to not get your genitals caught in the grinder.
It really hurts. Who can afford plastic surgery?
Stay safe everyone.
Two Deuce Bags and a Microphone. I'm Mark.
And I am Rob.
Hey everybody. Thanks for joining us. This evening is what it is when we're recording this.
It is Sunday evening and we're getting ready to get another round of storms here in Kansas City. Could be severe, if not very strong storms.
Out in Kansas they've already produced 100 mile hour winds so that'll be fun when they roll into here about 10 o'clock.
So I'm glad I don't have to get up early tomorrow. That way I can sleep in a little bit in case the storms rattle me awake a couple of times, you know.
But you know what? That's May in Missouri. Right? May in Missouri and Kansas. That's what you get.
Right. Yep. Mother Nature gives us an ass paddling in May.
So yeah. You know Rob and I don't just administer them. We get them from Mother Nature regularly. She's like, hey come here. Yeah? What do you want? Bam bam bam bam.
Then yeah. That's it. You go, thank you. Thank you ma'am. May I have another? And that's about it.
So alrighty. We're going to start off light hearted here. Chick-fil-A is reportedly launching a new dessert.
The limited time offer is going viral on social media. Because we're all fat asses.
The new offering is a banana pudding milkshake. Now that does sound good doesn't it?
Yeah it does.
That's right. You get your banana pudding and your milkshake fix all in one convenient little cup. Or big cup.
The insulin injections are sold separately. Sorry about that.
Oh I'm sure they are.
Yeah yeah. I think they have like the insulin store right next door. So you can run over there really quick. Get your blood sugar down. So there you go.
Roughly, well going right into this. Roughly half of America is now obese. So one out of two people are fat asses.
So anyhow just to help the obesity epidemic along is Taco Bell's new dipping tacos.
These crazy little steak enchilada grilled cheese dipping tacos will come with eight different choices of dipping sauce. And they look fantastic Rob.
So anyhow go get them while they're there. They're not going to take them away like anything. It's a gimmick.
It's like come on in get the dipping tacos. They're awesome. They'll probably be around a little while and then they're gone.
So it's designed to get a surge of people into Taco Bell. And it will. It sounds good to me.
So alright next on here Friday mark the end of NFL Network's All Access show.
You know what the hell am I going to use to fall asleep now Rob?
Yeah good question.
I know yeah. That show I have called Scream Ambient for a long time now.
Thanks NFL Network. Now I have to go back to counting sheep and strong muscle relaxers to sleep.
So you know I could drink five cups of coffee and two Red Bulls and fall asleep on that fucking show in the second sentence.
So I wondered how come it lasted as long as it did.
So anyhow speaking of football two backup chiefs offensive linemen were busted with pot in their car.
Yeah.
Oh wait a minute. This should be on news nobody gives a shit about. I'm sorry.
I'm going to say.
Actually it does go back to being over the Kansas line.
Yeah it is. That's the whole thing. That is the whole thing right there.
If they would have been one mile to the west or to the east not the west. If they've been one mile to the east they've been fine.
But because they were one miles to the west of Missouri you know they're in Kansas so that now it's it's not really like a huge deal.
But people there's a little bit of scuttlebutt about it right.
Right.
I mean they're not starters either is another thing too.
So you know if that would have been like I don't know Trace Smith or or I forgot who else anyhow one of those offensive linemen one of the starters.
Jawan Taylor or something like that.
Yeah that would have been a much bigger deal but they were backups and you know pot is legal in Missouri.
So they're only one mile off you know.
So anyhow I mean like I said that should be on moves nobody gives a shit about because no one really cares including me.
OK.
I almost brought it out last night.
I know and that's why if you're going to do it I was going to cross out this part of the of the monologue.
So anyhow but you didn't. So anyhow.
OK.
I figured we'd been banging on.
Yeah we have.
Well it's because of their own doing.
I know. I know.
Look I mean yeah if they wouldn't do stupid shit we wouldn't be talking about them doing stupid shit.
Right.
Fair enough.
Right.
Yeah.
There you go.
Don't do stupid shit and we won't talk about you doing stupid shit.
So.
All right.
So.
We still love you though.
Yeah we still love you.
Yeah but just don't make us talk about you doing stupid shit.
So anyhow.
All right.
I had an email that wants me to teach Rob goat noises.
So the premium goat noise service.
The premium goat noise service will have another goat.
Rob let's hear your goat noise.
I'm going to have to get some practice here.
OK.
Sorry guy.
Not on it. Maybe next time we'll see.
I forgot to write down the guy's name and already deleted the email so I don't even know what his name is.
But anyhow.
Sorry you don't get a goat noise from Rob right now.
So.
All right.
You know he said he really wants the goat to have a friend.
Well here's my suggestion.
I'll give it a shot.
Not right now.
Just not right now.
Whoever you are.
I'm sorry I didn't get your name and jot it down.
So.
I'm not very good at doing impressions.
Just.
I.
This guy was probably kidding anyhow.
But you know what.
I went ahead and put it in here.
So my suggestion is how about a duck.
We have the resident duck don't we Rob.
Yes we do.
Yeah.
So how about a duck being the goat's best friend.
Wank Wank.
See.
There you go.
Problem solved.
Whoever the hell you were but I didn't write down your name.
So.
I am in Duck Blind Studio.
Yep.
And he's been a duck his whole life.
So.
Yep.
Even tattooed on my arm.
See.
So there you go.
Whoever you are that I didn't bother to write down your name.
Thank you for your email.
Whoever you are.
Thank you.
But I didn't bother to write down your name.
All right.
Burger King is coming out with mozzarella fries.
The laxative is not included.
So imagine that mozzarella fries.
You'd be backed up for two days.
But it sounds great.
I mean that sounds like a perfect food to me.
But well you know.
Recently people have been getting calls from the number they have via their cell phone.
So the way that this was written down is kind of confusing.
And you'd have to go to the rest of the article to understand it.
But okay.
People are getting calls from their number.
Like you know my name.
My number is 8165.
Right.
Okay.
Well.
They're getting.
I would get a call from there.
My own number.
Okay.
And anyhow when you pick it up it's spam.
It's a bunch of advertisements.
And the advertisers said they have nothing to do with this.
You know like let's say it was.
Also you hear a Pampers commercial right.
Well then they go back to Kimberly Clark or whoever makes Pampers.
They're like we didn't do this.
We would never do this.
We wouldn't cold call someone and then spam them with a commercial.
So they're not sure how they're being able.
Number one.
The phone companies have not figured out how someone's been able to duplicate phone numbers and send them to that phone number.
They don't know how it's done.
And number two.
Probably so.
You're probably right.
And number two.
Why are they giving commercials out that they have no interest in.
See what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Is it a test run.
Is it a test run to fuck everybody's phone.
I don't know.
I don't know either.
It could be like a form of a cyber attack.
And I guess it's been happening on the East Coast a lot more than anywhere else.
So anyhow if you get if you get your own number don't pick it up.
I know curiosity make you go.
I didn't call myself.
So who is calling myself.
You know.
Anyhow interesting stuff.
All right.
Then next.
Scientists have put shrimp on a treadmill.
I'm not kidding you.
The over under is 40 seconds by the way.
We're betting those little shrimps last about 40 seconds and they're off the treadmill.
You got an over under.
Is that over under.
What do you think.
I think it's over.
I think it's a lot less.
OK.
Yeah I did too.
Yeah I was giving them probably about 10 seconds and their shrimp.
Yeah they're just yeah.
Yeah.
They're not going to stay in where I don't even know how the scientists get to get them
to get it.
But they're doing these experiments with them for real.
They have little treadmills and they have shrimp and they somehow taught shrimp to run
on these things per se.
I think I could think a lot better money with tax money.
I hope this is not tax money.
I was going to say is that where our tax dollars are going.
I guess so.
Oh oh and by the way I really want one of those little treadmills.
I want to know how to get one.
Yeah that would be cool.
Yeah yeah you put it on your desk.
I would have it in the Talk is Cheap studio right here and I would put it to where if
anyone came in it's like right there.
What's this?
Oh that's a tiny shrimp treadmill.
What?
You know shrimp.
Yeah it's one of their treadmills.
And then by that time I don't even want to know Mark.
Let's check out your get up here.
Yeah so anyhow.
All right.
So Aaron Rodgers in a recent interview stated that religion is just to manipulate people.
So so okay.
All right.
Point taken.
All right.
But so here's what I say Aaron Rodgers a form of manipulation is someone that plays fantastic
during the regular season and then chokes in the playoffs.
You have all this talent and then all of a sudden in the playoffs you lose all this talent
and can't play for shit.
I call that manipulation.
What about you?
Yeah yeah it definitely is.
Yeah so anyhow you know that's classic Rodgers you know.
So anyhow.
But anyhow here I'll just go into the whole article right here because it's kind of interesting.
So just when someone took the foot out of Aaron Rodgers mouth guess what he gets ahead
and crams that size 11 right back into his pie hole.
Well I added some stuff to the article.
Well this time a little A-Rodgs said that religion was used to manipulate people.
So let's see here Aaron I would call this manipulation having enough talent to win your
division but not enough talent to make it to the Super Bowl.
That's classic manipulation in my book.
Coming soon new product Aaron Rodgers mouth soap.
Go ahead and give little Johnny a mouthful of A-Rodgers mouth soap.
We all certainly hope the results work better than Aaron.
So anyhow.
Yesterday morning.
I got a text right.
And it said.
Hello Coach Williams.
Have a great weekend.
Are we still doing archery tomorrow.
So I was like okay this yeah yeah it it.
I think it was someone screwing with me but I don't know because I screwed with them back.
And they got kind of mad.
It said.
I get a text in the morning.
And I wake up and wonder who the hell text me.
Said hello Coach Williams.
Have a great weekend.
Are we going to do archery tomorrow.
And so I was like all right I thought about it and a couple hours later I kind of wake drink some coffee like I sent back a text that said Reggie wants to.
But my toe hurts.
So they sent me a text.
Yeah they sent me a text back don't ever.
What was it.
Shit did I erase it.
You know what I'll just.
About what it said.
Don't ever text me again.
And I said OK well maybe I should be saying that to you asshole.
I don't even think you realize that I was answering that text.
So then after that nothing crickets.
All right.
A New York coffee house has come out with an interesting new flavor.
The new flavor is King of Fruit.
This is a notorious fruit that the odor is so bad.
It is it was actually used in medieval times as a weapon.
It smells like a corpse.
Like a rotting corpse.
And it's called King of all fruit.
OK.
So now check this out Rob.
Jeffy X's uncovered coffee shop flavors that was declined.
Our buddy.
Yeah yeah.
So anyhow the story of Jeffy X's he goes undercover incognito.
And he goes to these places and he it's a very dangerous line of work.
So he gets into the he's infiltrates these places and he finds these list of stuff that like either was going to happen or bad products or whatever he's been doing this a long time for us.
And as a token of appreciation Rob knitted him embroidered underwear.
It was Jeffy on the back and X on the front of it.
And inside that underwear is a Stephen Piercey pouch.
And Stephen Piercey from the Glam Band Rat supposedly used to sew a patch on the inside of his in the crotch area of his spandex.
And he could stuff as many socks in there as he want you know to appease you know to maybe look more appetizing to women and maybe some gay males right.
So Rob was nice enough to give him one of those pouches in the embroidered underwear.
But the thing is we don't think Jeffy X even needs them but he did it just in case you know if Jeffy's you know just one you know pad the stats that's fine.
So and also he made him a Sergeant Pepper's outfit which Jeffy refuses to take off.
He's still wearing it isn't he.
Yes he is.
And it's black and crusty right now but he doesn't care.
And a flying bat suit.
And whenever he puts on the flying bat suit he puts it over his Sergeant Pepper's outfit because he refuses to take it off.
So anyhow and me I'm a much simpler guy.
I gave him the monetary equivalent to 50 hookers and 10 pounds of blow or something like that.
So if he wants to pay off a bill he can.
If he wants to buy hookers and blow he can.
So anyhow so Jeffy X thank you for this list.
And this is coffee flavors that was declined.
Number one codfish flavored was a no go.
Do you believe that?
Actually I think I kind of have to agree with that.
Okay.
Not that early in the morning.
Well how about tofu coffee?
Okay yeah.
I could see that one.
Okay tofu coffee.
I think that's tofu for breakfast.
Yeah okay all right okay.
Blood sausage flavor.
I think I'm going to have to go with that one what do you think?
Yeah.
Number four is an interesting one and I don't know how they came up with it.
Bamboo flavored.
What the hell?
Tastes like wood?
Yeah.
Oh maybe you take a little bamboo straw and you mix your coffee with it.
Maybe that's the gimmick.
Now it might go good if you're burning incense.
Oh okay you figured it out.
Okay Rob thank you for making clarity of it.
Yeah.
All right.
I bet it would go good smelling incense.
Oh yeah yeah a little bamboo in your coffee.
You could chew on the bamboo like those old cinnamon sticks remember them?
Yeah.
Yeah you could dunk it in your coffee and gnaw on it.
Hell yeah we got it figured out.
Arm pit flavored was refused.
Yeah I think I get that one too.
Yeah probably so.
Especially hairy.
Yeah yeah yeah I'm pretty sure that's what I envisioned when I read it.
Hairy arm pit flavored.
Next one mushroom enhanced coffee.
I think that would make you have to have little mushrooms floating around in it right?
Yeah.
Okay I get it.
I get it.
How about sour apple coffee?
It was declined.
To me that sounds good.
Yeah I could save a market for that.
Yeah I think that sounds fantastic but they said no.
And then barbeque flavored sweet and spicy and let's see what else apple flavored barbeque were both declined.
Once again I see nothing wrong with those.
I don't see nothing wrong with that either.
Then paper towel flavored coffee was denied.
You know you ever get paper towel in your mouth accidentally I think I understand that.
Yeah I understand that.
Or else you have to bang the paper towel to absorb the coffee.
Oh yeah man Rob you're making sense of this man.
Okay that's probably what it's trying.
Hey what does sobriety do?
That's true.
Alright Rob you're making much more sense of this than I am.
So the next one was declined and I think I kind of get it marble flavored.
Yeah it tastes like glass.
Yeah marble flavored I don't know where they came up with that.
But yeah okay I think I get that one.
Teriyaki was not approved.
I've got a real issue with that.
Who does not love teriyaki Rob?
Good point.
Yeah I don't care if it's coffee or a sandwich or whatever.
Teriyaki is good.
I don't know who the hell turned this down.
But whoever did you're not right.
Alright whoever this focus panel was I don't think you know your coffee.
Next one turtle soup flavored coffee was turned down.
That would be big in the shop.
Yeah yeah that's what I was thinking too.
They could even mix it with chicory coffee.
Chicory and turtle soup flavored coffee.
I mean you go down to New Orleans or something like that.
You know Louisiana or Mississippi.
They'd have that everywhere right?
Yeah they would.
That would be on every street corner.
I think they really missed the boat with that one.
And finally beef broth flavored was not favored in it.
So it went away.
So what do you think of that?
I have a problem with that.
I think that would be good.
Hell yeah.
I mean it would be like ramen noodles without the noodles.
Yeah.
And caffeine.
The caffeinated ramen noodle juice.
What the hell is wrong with that?
Right.
Yeah.
Alright Rob once again we turn to you to make this program legible.
Hey.
Yes you.
We'll see about that one buddy.
Especially for my first one.
Donors are fun aren't they?
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Wee.
They're an entertainment staple whether at the center of action or providing comic relief.
And perhaps more importantly they're an entirely inoffensive stereotype that bus stops can do a half decent impression of.
Uh huh.
One popular bit of we slang that people tend to throw around in smoking circles is some variation on don't bogart that joint man.
Uh huh.
When it comes to herbal refreshment bogarting is considered the height of rudeness.
It highlights the old puff puff pass rule and suggests that you're taking your sweet time and more than your first chair.
It comes of course from the actor Humphrey Bogart.
Uh huh.
That's the narrated Hollywood classics as Tasha Blanca and the Maltese Falcon can be associated with weed in the first place as a lot of all year and that just because of the gadget.
According to Green's dictionary slang the term itself can have a few different meanings including to act aggressively in a bullying manner or to enter without invitation.
Uh huh.
That's cinema's favorite type based icon would not do.
In the 1960s if you barged your way through a crowd or shoved someone you could be have easily thank yous a bogart.
It's second better meaning also originated in the 1960s with the rise of the counterculture.
It was used to describe one who retained something selfishly or more specifically to monopolize or smoke too much of a cannabis cigarette.
While the screen wasn't known for being a night talker he did have a rather notorious habit of having a cigarette permanently dangling from his lips which is how the association took root.
But the term was really immortalized in the fraternity of man's song Don't Bogart Me which was used in the 1969's Easy Rider and featured the lyrics don't bogart that joint my friend pass it over to me.
The meaning intended by the band wasn't about smoking too much but rather about hanging onto the joint too long without smoking it.
Wow.
Okay.
There is the origination of bogart.
Bogart.
Now I've always wondered that.
Me too.
Yeah.
Hang on one second.
Rob.
I'm having a little bit of technical difficulties.
Everyone will be right back.
Invisible ass paddling, new douche flavors and horrible pranks.
The fuck is wrong with these guys?
Break shit house energy drink.
That's right.
Break shit house energy drink.
Make men feel like a girl.
Choke on their balls.
Who wants to fuck shit up?
Run for a scum across America.
Break shit house is for you.
Please enjoy break shit house energy drink responsibly.
It's not readily available anywhere because of liability issues.
Jam X.
What the hell happened?
You were the generation of change.
You never wanted to be one of them.
At the feet.
Spoke for you.
Hunk the man.
Hunk the system.
What the hell happened?
The generation of angst.
The generation of noncompliance.
Is now buying a boat.
You're really fed up to kill someone who dangled a dollar near you.
Great job Xers.
Everything's ruined.
Hi all.
This is Chicago.
I am the most dangerous city in North America.
You can't touch me.
Oh yeah?
This is Kansas City here.
Hold my beer bitch.
Next up, things overheard in hell.
Joe Buck and Troy Aitman are being all televised in radio games of the NFL this year.
Have you ever wondered where something came from?
Have you ever looked at something and said, hey I wonder what the origin of that is?
Well so have we.
That's why we gave you the origin of.
The origin of socks.
Believe it or not the ancient Egyptians are responsible for knit socks.
From around 300 to 500 AD were the first recorded knit socks worn by anybody in the world.
The apocalypse just happened.
You don't know what to do.
You don't know where to go.
But we can tell you what you can eat.
Garlic mustard could and should be a go to food during an apocalypse.
Garlic mustard is plentiful everywhere.
It is actually an invasive weed.
But it can be very delicious and easily taken from about any pasture.
Garlic mustard can be stewed or even pan fried for delicious taste.
It can also be added to other ingredients whether it's a salad or any other type of food to enhance it.
Garlic mustard should be a go to staple during the apocalypse.
As much fun as an electric can opener to the scrotum.
Two douchebags and a microphone.
Two douchebags and microphone Mark.
And I'm up.
Okay, hey did you ever get your nipple flick, nipple ink?
No, I did not get that together.
Okay, that's alright. We'll do it Tuesday night then.
Tuesday night.
Okay, cool.
Well, you know Tokyo is struggling with problems of a really invasive species.
I mean it's just tearing up everything, getting in garbage and just like running everything.
I mean just going nuts.
And you know what it is?
What?
Raccoons. North American raccoons.
I did not know they were on over there.
They didn't.
Someone must have let one loose somehow or something.
They're not sure how it got there but these are North American raccoons.
And anyhow, he, you know, the animals have exploded in numbers and is devastating all their crops.
You know, the thing I think is, is won't they take and you know how they block Mount Fuji with a mural, right?
I say they make several murals of like wolves.
Those raccoons ain't going to sit there with wolves or coyotes right there, right?
Maybe, maybe, maybe not.
Yeah, I don't know.
Hey, just a shot.
And, okay, and real quick, a Canadian man combined his love for Star Wars and Legos by building a 7,541 piece Millennium Falcon.
Millennium, yeah, anyhow.
Wow.
Yeah.
Then his mom came downstairs and told him to get that shit off the floor.
And promptly gave him ten dishwashing applications.
Rob, your turn.
All right, Mike Tyson made things incredibly awkward at a press conference when he made a bizarre confession to Jake Paul on the other day of July 25.
Okay.
After previously exchanging trash talk during their respective television appearances, the two fighters were face to face for thirty nights pressing.
Uh huh.
One moment, Paul jokingly said that he wanted to kiss Tyson.
When Tyson heard that, he decided to take that time and even pull it.
He wanted to kiss me, Tyson asked.
That's so ironic that he said that because I saw a picture of him dancing at sixteen doing that little dance on YouTube.
For some reason, I got an erection.
For Tyson, that kind of pre-fight talk isn't completely out of the ordinary.
During his prime, it wasn't uncommon for him to make similar aggressively vulgar remarks.
Uh, July fight will take place July 20 at the AT&T Stadium in Harleyton, Texas.
Though the men are more than thirty years apart in age, the state's athletic commission has sanctioned it as a professional fight that will count toward their respective records.
Yeah, yeah, it is an actual fight.
Yeah, uh, yeah.
Wow, that, yeah.
I'm gonna definitely tune into that.
I wanna see it.
Definitely.
We'll, um, we'll see what happens.
I know there's a lot, a lot of hype for the thing, so I hope it's good.
Because if it isn't good, it's just gonna suck because there's so much hype going on right now.
You know?
Yeah.
Alright, um, a sarcastic Facebook marketplace post has turned into an outreach in the community.
A centennial man, Justin Malk, was having a boring evening cleaning his apartment when he happened upon a plastic King Supers bag.
Plastic bags are now banned in Colorado, so he decided to post to a Facebook marketplace to get a few laughs.
He posted the never-been-used King Supers bag for $50, and he woke up to hundreds of comments and messages.
And he said, I was just like, being sarcastic and, and, and tried to spread joy to friends and positivity thinking somebody will get a laugh out of this, Malk said.
So, anyhow, the joke took an unexpected turn when Malk realized he had a buyer for the bag, the owner of Mother Cutter's Design in Aurora, Colorado.
She said she liked the idea and wanted to get behind it, and not only will I pay you $50, I'll double it.
And I was like, wow, that's super cool.
And this is what Malk said.
Wow, that's super cool.
And I was like, if you do that, then I'll match it, Malk said.
So all of a sudden, we're at $200.
My employer, Mike's Bikes, caught wind of it and said they'll match up to $500.
But that money isn't going towards Malk, but rather to Sec or Cares, a nonprofit food bank.
So that's pretty cool, you know, they turned this, they turned this whole bag thing into actually a charity, and it's going to help people.
It's kind of a full circle moment.
That plastic bag that we can no longer use, it still brings money and awareness to our local population, said Lisa Long of Secor.
It was a full circle moment to Malk, too.
He told Fox 31 that after an injury put him out of work, he went to the Soaker Food Bank for help.
They helped me out. So I figure it was my turn to give back to them, Malk said.
Pretty cool.
Yeah.
Yeah, turning that into helping people. I'm all for that. That's good.
All right, Rob, we look at you.
All right.
The daily shower is more controversial thing than you might think.
Are we showering too much, too little? Is the water too hot or too cold?
What is the rat doing in here anyway?
I don't know why they put that in.
For some reason, the one that would...
That was funny, Rob. I'm sorry. Go ahead.
Yeah, what is the rat doing in here anyway?
But for some reason, the one that really gets people grimacing is the question of when to shower.
If you're a morning shower, since you couldn't imagine waiting until bedtime to scrub off the night's sweat and grime.
If you eventually shower in the evening, on the other hand, you likely recoil at the idea of going into bed still covered in the dirt and dust of the day.
So who's in the right? Is it better to start the day sparkling or wind down with a wash?
We looked into the silence and the answer may surprise you.
Yeah, I'm kind of curious.
According to a 2022 Sleep Foundation survey, 42% of U.S. adults start their day with a bath or shower.
But more than 25% do work out before bed.
And even under overshadows of 38%, we report showering or bathing at just some point in the evening.
So there must be something to it, right?
I shower in the morning to really wake up to feel alive. Cleveland Clinic, dermatologist, A lot, Ridge, ComEd in 2023.
I just don't feel like myself if I'm starting my day without having a clean, freshly scrubbed face.
There are biological reasons behind this morning boost. Your body relies on certain cues to regulate.
It's written and a regular shower can serve as a signal that it's time to wake up and become more alert.
I mean, Rob, is there any set way really?
Isn't it when you feel dirty and you don't smell so good, you're like, OK, it's time to get a shower?
Yeah, yeah, that's true.
Yeah, I mean, I just don't see someone going, you know what?
It's not morning, so I'm not going to I smell like shit and I got poison ivy on me, I think.
But I got to wait till morning. You see, I just don't see someone doing that to you.
Right.
But anyhow, going through this whole long story, OK, here's the verdict.
OK.
If showing the morning or evening made that much of a difference, we wouldn't need an explainer article to decide which was better.
The truth is, there's not all that much in it either way.
There's no definitive answer for the global population on whenever the day, evening, birthday, morning shower.
But for each individual, there tends to be a right answer and it's all based on preference.
OK, well, fine.
So quit our unit over.
Yeah, yep.
Somewhere in the heavens, your great Grammy Gertrude is crying because her little Bebo is listening to this film.
Oh, Lord, that man just saw a puppy and hey, don't worry.
I have a clown nose.
Oh, no, that drunk guy just hit my child.
It's OK.
I have a clown nose.
Clown nose.
Just put one on and you can do anything.
Want to run for office?
Murder people in public?
Just grab a clown nose and bam, everyone laughs.
Clown noses are sold at gag stores online and pedophile conventions.
Grab one today and make magic happen.
Hey, look, I think we found land.
Oh, my God, I think we're safe.
Oh, no, it's the island of horrible jokes.
Why do golfers take an extra pair of socks with them when they golf in case they get a hole in one?
Hey there, fuck stick.
You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.
The goat farm in Montana has a parrot trained to call the goats in for dinner every night.
Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser.
Hey, girl, do you work at Subway?
Because you just gave me a foot long.
So, you know, you ever, you know, people say the saying it's raining gold or whatever, right?
It means they're like making a killing at something or, you know, or everyone's doing great and all that.
Well, in Antarctica, gold was raining and it might still be.
It sounds like a dream, but it's true.
The Antarctica gold rains from the sky tucked in among the glaciers.
Fiery Mount Erebus is the southern most active volcano on Earth, proven a bit of heat amid the frozen landscape.
The frozen continent features 138 volcanoes, according to a 2017 study with around nine of them reported as active with a summit elevation of 12,000.
And 148 feet Mount Erebus is the most well known.
Erebus is one of these volcanoes that from that form Ross Island.
And it said that it was erupting when it was discovered in 1841 during a voyage of Captain James Clark Ross,
who carried out important magnetic surveys in the Arctic and Antarctic and discovered the Ross Sea in the Victoria land region of Antarctica.
So anyhow, scientists still observed volcano through Mount Erebus Volcano Observatory and conduct field campaigns to look for extreme life forms.
The largest Antarctic settlement, you know what?
Fuck all that.
Let me just get to it here.
Let's see.
The volcano regularly pumps out plumes of gasses steam has been known to eject boulders, partially molten rock known as volcanic bombs.
While the volcanic bombs are exciting, the bursts of gas and tiny crystals of metallic gold that surprised scientists who estimate the volcano spews around 80 grams of gold a day.
That's worth six thousand dollars.
The gold has been found hundreds of miles away from Mount Erebus.
Antarctic researchers have detected traces of gold dust in ambient air for up to 621 miles away.
Whoo. Yeah.
Yeah.
Sorry about that long ass thing, but I don't know whoever the fuck it was thought they were going to be cute and write a whole bunch of shit about it.
So anyhow, the most important thing is this right here.
It's raining gold in Antarctica.
So if you want to go get some gold, go to Mount Erebus.
So anyhow, Rob, we look at you.
Have fun with that, by the way.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Good luck to you.
Yep.
Bring a coat.
All right.
I've got some phrases that originated in the Navy that a lot of people wouldn't even realize.
Very cool.
Okay.
The first one is carry on.
Most are familiar with the British phrase, keep calm and carry on, but were you aware that the last part has naval origins on days that experience particularly good weather, general winds, if we're being specific, the order to carry on was beginning.
This indicated that all available sails would be raised.
So good weather makes as much energy can.
Okay.
Next, let the cat out of the bag.
Laying the cat out of the bag is Navy slang to describe the punishment of whipping.
The cat refers to the cat in nine tails, a formidable multi-tailed whip stored within a cloth bag.
The cat knows knew it was about to be used when the superior going out the punishment pulled it out of its bag.
Okay, cool.
Next, scuttlebutt.
I use that all the time.
It would be nice to know what it means or where it came from.
Scuttlebutt is a Navy slang for a rumor. The word comes from gettle which means to intentionally sink one ship by opening holes in the side and but the water container men would group around and talk.
Essentially it describes the effect rumors have on morale.
Hmm.
Okay.
I guess I can still use scuttlebutt.
I mean it's pretty close, right?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Then we have taken aback.
Okay.
While it might not seem like a phrase of naval origin, the fact is that taken aback is a form of Navy slang.
Modern speakers use it to describe when they're stopped or surprised about something that they originally referred to when a sudden strong gust of wind hit a ship's sails and pushed them in the opposite direction.
Uh huh.
Then we have he knows the ropes.
Wow. And all these originated from the Navy, huh?
Yeah, according to this article.
Okay.
This term commonly used in English language was originally used to describe a novice sailor.
It would be printed on their discharge and meant they knew the names and purpose of a ship's main ropes.
Basically it formed their subpoenas that they knew the very basics of seamanship.
Uh huh.
Wow.
Um, and then spinning a yarn.
Okay.
The day to spin a yarn means to tell a story, one that's perhaps slightly exaggerated.
It's seething origin state that the naval officers would believe that if demons spent too much time telling stories, then no work would be done.
At least once a week a ship's crew would have to unravel old lines of rope.
During this, the men could converse and tell stories as much as they pleased, and the time became known as spinning yarns.
Wow. Okay.
And then I have one final one.
Okay. These are pretty cool.
Yeah.
Double toupee.
Oh, this is going to be interesting I bet.
This expression is today to describe that something unintended is looming.
However, some claim the term originated from the despised task of waterproofing a wooden ship's longest seam along the keel.
This is sometimes disputed, but there are many who believe it.
This team was named the devil and would be paid or covered by tar.
Paying the devil was an extremely unpleasant and difficult job, and the name was eventually used to describe any unwanted situation.
Oh, wow. Cool.
I thought that was a pretty good one.
That is really good. All that stuff interests me a lot.
I mean where these originate and all that, and that's how come I like to do Origin of.
I've got a bunch more that I've got to do. I've just got to have time to do them.
Yeah.
Anybody that's interested, I found this on War History Online.
I've been finding some pretty good articles on War History Online.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
Yeah, that was a good article. Thank you, Rob.
You know, artists are getting tired of Ticketmaster because it's really starting to affect a lot of artist sales.
You know, I mean, we may not technically be in a recession, but man, people can't afford shit anymore, right? Agreed?
I mean, inflation is off the hook, housing prices are insane, taxes are way up, okay?
So, artists start getting together and going, you know what?
Our venues are not selling like they used to, and we think it's because of Ticketmaster greed.
So, anyhow, the Cures Robert Smith recently convinced Ticketmaster to refund unduly high fees to their fans.
Could this be a start of artists holding the ticket-selling giant to account?
At present, you'd be hard-pressed to find a music fan with any positive thoughts about Ticketmaster.
Well, from two very different musical camps, Cures Robert Smith and his Goth Army are ready to join the Swifties in a battle against ticketing giant as another fan base is burdened by pricing.
As tickets went on sale for the band's US tour, prices were nearly doubled thanks to hefty service fees, facility charges, and a processing fee.
Despite purposely setting their prices at an accessible limit, the ticket's as low as $20, and opting out of dynamic pricing during apparent conversations with the platform, Cure fans still got shafted.
In a series of tweets to fans, Smith said he is as sickened as you all are, and he actually convinced Ticketmaster to refund some of these unreachable fees to their fans.
But the fact this happened at all when the Cures supposedly did everything right is wrong, and now the Taylor Swifties are getting involved, and maybe they can make a difference.
There's a lot more to this article, but you know what? I mean, here's the deal.
The bigger bands, I mean, the Cure was a big band in their time, right?
But they're not selling out T-Mobile centers, they're not selling out AT&T Stadium like Swifties, right?
So them complaining about it is one thing, but Swifties, her army, can have something done about it.
Because if they stop going to Swift concerts because of the prices, Ticketmaster's going to lose a lot of fucking money, right?
Right.
So I'm hoping this is the start of a new revolution against Ticketmaster and Live Nation.
Because in my opinion, the fees are just, they're wrong.
The fees are wrong. The stuff that they charge are insane.
They don't have to charge that much. It's all corporate greed.
And I don't want to hear people go, well, that's capitalism.
Fuck you, okay? Why don't you go live in a ditch and, you know, if you think all this price gouging is okay.
You know, it's fucked up.
So anyhow, I'm glad they're doing something about it. I hope something gets done about it.
Because if Ticketmaster is involved in a show, I have nothing to do with them anymore.
I hate their fucking guts and I hate Live Nation.
All they are is a big ripoff to me.
This is my opinion and I don't want to do business with them.
I think they're a horrible company. So anyhow, Rob, what do you think?
Yeah, I agree. I mean, the rates are just ungodly.
I've been seeing, they've been on Facebook and actually different advertisements for concerts.
Those people are offering concerts for $25 a ticket.
Really? Where at?
At the smaller venues. Other different venues.
Oh, okay. Okay. I got you.
Yeah. I've been seeing ads. So, you might go to the...
That's very cool. That is really cool.
Yeah, and the reason I'm going to go see Glenn Hughes and head east out there at where the Missouri State Fair is in Sedalia.
The reason I'm going to go see him, well, number one, I'm a huge Glenn Hughes fan.
And also like head east, it'll be fun to watch. I don't even know if it has any original members.
But the main thing is, is they're not gouging us on the tickets. The tickets are very reasonable, especially for that big event.
There's like seven bands that are going to play that day.
And I got VIP area for $75. And the reason I got VIP...
Oh wow.
Yeah, I have to pretty much get that. Val has a bad back, thanks to the post office.
You know, so, you know, I want her to be comfortable as possible. Yes.
So, yeah, I mean, you could get in there for 30, $40. I think it's like 30 something in processing fees.
I think it's a little bit over 40. And you get seven bands, including a legendary guy that was in deep purple,
including head east, which is a legendary band and some other bands that were really good.
I forgot who they are currently, but I mean, and Ticketmaster is not involved.
So, you know, it seems like every like the uptown theater, they don't go through Ticketmaster and all their concerts are pretty reasonable.
There's no gouging going on there. It looks to me, in my opinion, like Ticketmaster Live Nation are the ones doing the gouging.
And that's pretty much it. Everyone else, I think, has come to the realization.
They're like, you know what, if we charge more, we're going to school ourselves.
What they do is they charge reasonable price to get in.
And then they hope you have enough money for a couple of beers and a t-shirt.
That is the ammo right now of people making money on the road. That is a template for success.
Like the Walsh show that I watched in Tulsa about a year and a half ago.
And I hope he gets better because I still have one in Memphis.
I have two tickets to that that that that I want to use.
But he had back surgery, Blackie Lawless did. So he's been out for quite a while.
But Walsh show wasn't wasn't gouging tickets very reasonable.
Didn't go through Ticketmaster is at the Tulsa Theater, which is a beautiful theater.
And anyhow, and because it was reasonably priced, I saw a lot of people buying shirts, hats, trinkets of wasp.
You know, the stuff that proves you were there, you know, and and I kind of figured out it's like, all right, they don't charge much for the tickets.
You get in there and then you buy a bunch of beer and you buy a couple of t-shirts and they made their money like that.
They don't have to gouge you. So anyhow, I guess I'm done with this subject because it really pisses me off.
So anyhow, Rob, go ahead, take it away.
All right. Some things that are worth buying anymore because they're too expensive.
Home ownership in 1990, the average single family home cost one hundred thousand dollars.
Now it costs four hundred thousand. Wow.
400 percent during that same time, the average household income is increased by 25 percent. That makes home ownership a significant sacrifice for some families and completely out of reach for others.
Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I see that.
I do, too. Every day. Streaming services.
Streaming is increasing costs and service providers are cracking down on sharing accounts.
So people are turning back the cable and satellite services for more cost effective options.
Streaming that used to cost ten dollars for several users now costs fifteen a month for a single user.
Wow. On the other hand, the price of satellite cable has increased only slightly over the past decade.
Well, so, you know, I guess if you got so many streaming services, take them away, you might be able to afford cable.
You know? Yeah. And that's wrong.
You know. Yeah, that's true.
And this isn't first world problems. OK.
Look, we have a really good system in America and people generally usually have work unless you're just some lazy fuck like a lot of people are.
OK. You can usually find work and before you can usually kind of scrape together a decent living if you're really trying.
Right. Like let's say all you can get is a job at McDonald's.
You work your way up to assistant manager and then probably shift manager and then maybe to the manager of the store.
And then you're making a lot of money. OK.
It may not be fun, may not be easy. You may spend a lot of time at McDonald's, but you're making a good living.
You're making a decent living anymore. I don't think it's possible.
I don't think it is. Everything is stacked against the common man.
Everything. And it seems to be some sort of a system of keep away now.
Maybe it always was. Maybe I've never viewed it like that, but it almost looks like keep away.
And you know, I agree with you. Yeah.
And it's sickening. And I'm glad you did that story right after I did the ticket bastard because there's still more on there.
Oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. I apologize. Yeah. Yeah.
High quality meat. People are buying less high quality meat. Families that cook their own food are relying more on lower quality cuts that cost less and can go further.
A steak costs 50 percent more than it did five years ago.
The price of groceries in general has exceeded the growth of household income, which the next one on the list is groceries.
The last annual figures released by the Bureau of Labor Statistics reveal that grocery prices are up by 10.1 percent year over year.
This means that that is sickening. Think about it. People have turned to store brands.
They're planning meals better and they're wasting less food.
Hey, Rob, you think we'll go back to drink and just beer black and white label?
Honestly, I can almost see it coming out. I could too. Honestly. Yeah.
It's like the early 80s again, where all the generic stuff started coming out and it didn't have a label on it at all.
It was just black and white typing, black typing on a white surface.
And it said beer. Then if you got light beer, I said light beer. It would say mozzarella cheese and it's in black and white.
It's just typing. No gimmick stuff. And it was cheaper. I think another one of those is coming up.
But go ahead. Go ahead with your article. We call it generic. Yes. And it was big for years. It was big for years, wasn't it?
Yeah. People could afford it. Yeah. Yeah. Anyhow, Rob, go ahead. OK. Here's a real quick.
And impulse purchasing is becoming a thing of the past.
Eating out is no longer a weekly pastime that most enjoy.
With restaurant prices rising more, the consumer pricing that is pushing people into less expensive options.
And dining in is selling for inexpensive options. I can believe that.
The cost of entertainment, such as movie tickets or concert tickets, is rising every day.
People look for free alternatives or less expensive ways to have fun by going to the library or the park or museum or watching movies or TV shows at home using streaming services.
Uh huh. Fast fashion might be losing its appeal.
People want drugs are being reassessed with more investment going into quality pieces, which will last longer and close source second hand.
Wow. You know, remember, I think it was like the 90s when the economy was really bad and everybody went to thrift stores and bought their clothes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I could see that coming back.
That's where I get my work clothes. You might as well. Yeah. I care. Yeah. My work clothes take a beating.
You saw in metal you take a great degree of sparks that choose under denim just like nothing. So yeah.
And all the cutting oil that's on the steel when we get it. You know. Yes. Oh yeah. I look like a mechanic coming home.
Oh, I bet you do. Yeah. Wow. And yeah, that's heavy work. Anyhow, go ahead. You still have more. Okay. I have three more. Okay.
The price of new cars is skyrocketed. 20% years. No shit. Yeah. As a result, many are skipping new purchases and keeping older cars longer or opting for used ones.
Yep. Let's forging on luxury items. Isn't it's common. It's hard to justify fancy watch or designer bag. I agree. I agree too. Yep.
I'm talking about print subscriptions. Okay. As in newspapers, magazines. Okay. So just to be clear.
You're talking about the thing in the past. Okay. You're talking about print. Like that's on paper. You're not talking about online subscriptions. Okay.
Yeah. Yeah. Newspapers, magazines. Yeah. Because all the newspapers are online now and they charge you like a buck a month. They're much cheaper, but you can get any article that's in the paper newspaper.
But you have to subscribe to it and it's pretty cheap. Or you start out a buck. Maybe it's five bucks after that or something like that. All the newspapers are doing that.
And that's why I asked that because you're not talking about those. You're talking about what's actually on a paper like a kid would throw in your yard in the morning.
Right. Right. Okay. Yeah. The subscription costs for print newspapers and magazines have risen significantly.
Often exceeding $200 annually for daily newspapers.
Going to airports and you go to buy a paper magazine because it's a long flight and you may not have internet because internet and a lot of these planes, if they are internet equipped, they're spotty. They go out quite a bit and they're really slow.
So you grab a couple of physical magazines like People, Us, whatever, World News, and you grab them to read to have something to do while you're on that plane. Right.
Those things are like seven bucks, eight bucks, nine bucks a pop now.
And that's the cover price. I'm not talking about what they charge in an airport, which is highly inflated. I'm talking about the cover price of a small magazine is at least usually at least eight bucks.
That's ridiculous.
Yeah. And that part does go on to say digital subscriptions generally range from $10 to $20 a month.
Oh, they're higher than I thought. Okay. The come on is a dollar a month.
Yeah.
Like the Star, the Washington Post or the New York Post, the Washington, whatever. Anyhow. Okay. The come on is a dollar to start, I think. And then after that, they jack the price up.
You know, just kind of like satellite radio is like, hey, come join us for a buck. And then they got your credit card information. And yeah.
So, hmm. Wow. That's a good article, Rob. Thank you.
Yeah, I kind of like that one.
Yep. Me too.
Well, I've got a just as I thought I was out.
They pull me back in.
And that would and that would be the Royals.
They are 10 games above 500 and playing very well.
And they are like a half game out of first place. And they're definitely would be in the playoffs if it ended right now.
And we're going on June.
Royals. Congratulations. Keep it up.
I mean, I'm actually contemplating going to a baseball game this year.
I might go to a couple of them.
So that's pretty cool.
Nice little pleasant surprise.
And especially, you know, with the Chiefs doing so well and the Royals are really I mean, when July comes around and it's training camp, right.
You don't hear anything about the Royals anymore.
It's all Chiefs. It's because they're already out of it, right.
It would be refreshing for the Royals to take the front page while training camps coming on.
I mean, I'm not nearly as big a baseball fan as I used to.
And that's because they ruined the sport for me because most of the times it's not competitive for a smaller market.
And to me, it's greed. And I don't like that.
And I don't like and I like the people that destroyed the game.
So I stay away from it a lot, a lot more than I used to.
I don't watch it nearly as much. I disengaged with it.
I got closer to the NFL. I got closer to hockey, you know, stuff like that.
So and anyhow, the Royals doing this has got me a little bit excited about the season.
And now I look on my phone to see if they won or lost.
I look and see how Salvi Perez is hitting Bobby Witt Jr.
You see, I even know the names, you know, they have they have some pretty good pitchers.
I mean, so congratulations to the Royals.
Keep up the good work. I mean, I really, you know, I really would like to have a second sport that I can go to in Kansas City, you know.
I mean, I could pick an NBA team or a hockey team, but it's not the same as them being here. Right.
All right. So anyhow, you got anything else, Rob?
Oh, I'm looking through right now.
Oh, hi, Grandma Opal. Hi, Jimmy. Hi, Ricky.
Hi, Grandma. Hi, Jimmy. Hi, Ricky. Love you guys.
Dodge City, Kansas, getting pelted right now with severe storms.
Keep your head down and look outside, guys.
Don't get near windows. I'm not kidding you.
It's 100 mile an hour winds in these. Yeah. Yeah.
Houston got fucking destroyed by like 110 mile an hour winds.
It was what they call a Doroco or a Derico, which is a land hurricane.
Basically, it's a storm that just builds up intense intensity and just like goes crazy, like 111 mile an hour winds.
That's like an EF2 tornado only everywhere.
So, I mean, and this is basically a hurricane on land and it's happening a lot more now.
And so they're having 100 mile an hour winds out in central Kansas today.
So there's not very many windows that are still intact and probably a lot of cars have big dents on them, if not trees.
So I hope you guys are OK out there. I hope everybody's safe and I hope not too many things got destroyed.
But anyhow, Dodge City, Kansas was included in that zone and the severe storms came through there.
So I hope Grandma Opal, Jimmy and Ricky are all safe and doing well.
The line may have made it past him by now. I don't know. This is a couple hours ago.
So anyhow, anyhow, Rob, you got something?
Yeah, yeah, I came up with some accidental inventions that we use every day.
OK.
Well, a lot of people knew that Tinnisillum was accidental.
And in 1928, after returning from a vacation, Alexander Fleming, a status scientist, found a petri dish of bacteria he had left out
and developed a greenish mold instead of just parting the spoiled sample.
You notice they clear halo where no bacteria grew around the mold. This was him to identify the mold as Tinnisillum nodum.
It's a form of penicillin, right?
Tinnisillum, the worst antibody.
OK.
Then we have the Slinky. In 1943, naval engineer Richard T. James was tinkering the springs, hoping to create stabilizers for maritime equipment.
When he asked to knock one off a shelf, he watched the amazement as it walked down and started falling. This unexpected event gave birth to the Slinky.
Wow.
As the post-it notes, in 1958, Dr. Spencer Silver, a researcher at 3M, was on a mission to create a super-strong adhesive instead of being one that barely stuck at all.
It seemed like a dud until his colleague Art Fry had a lightbulb moment.
Fry, frustrated with paper bookmarks falling out of his handbook, realized Silver's low-touch adhesive could be the perfect solution.
They developed a sticky note that could be repositioned without damage.
Cool.
Yeah. Teflon.
OK.
Dr. Plunkett's experience in 1938 while working with DuPont's lab, Plunkett tried making a new refrigerant.
Mm-hmm.
And barely discovered the gas left overnight in a canister had turned into a white, waxy substance.
This accidental find, known as Teflon, was not stick, heat-resistant, and super slick.
DuPont saw its potential in industrial uses, but it was a French engineer's wife who saw the kitchen magic.
She suggested using Teflon to coat cookware, leading to the nonstick pans we love today.
Cool. And that's Teflon, right?
Yeah, Teflon.
OK. Great invention. I mean, you know, nothing sticks to it.
Right. Silicone.
During World War II, with rubber and short supply, the hat for alternals were on.
Engineer James Wright was mixing boric acid with silicone oil when he stumbled upon a gooey, stretchy substance.
It wasn't the rubber's substitute he aimed for, but it bounced and stretched like nothing else.
Wright's employers weren't impressed, but Peter Hobson, a savvy businessman, saw its potential as a toy.
That silly putty was born.
Cool.
And I'm going to wrap it up with one final one here.
OK.
Implantable pacemaker.
Really? That was an accident? Or, yeah.
In 1956, Wilson Greatbatch was an engineering professor working on a device to record heart sounds.
When he made a serendipitous mistake, he used the wrong type of resistor.
And instead of recording sounds, the device emitted electronic pulses.
These pulses mimic the natural rhythm of the heart leading to the creation of the first implantable pacemakers.
Wow.
Very cool.
That was cool.
Yeah, thank you, Rob. That was a fantastic article. I appreciate that.
All your articles tonight have been excellent, so thank you, Rob.
I've got an invention, too, that I love.
OK, you're familiar with Boulevard Brewing Company, right, here in Kansas City?
Yeah.
OK. Do you remember Tank 7?
It almost was kind of... OK, it is a stout, maybe a Belgian almost style brew.
It's very good, and it's one of their best sellers. It was by accident.
They didn't mean to even make that beer.
And they published an article about it, and I was like, wow.
And then they're like, you know what, let's just try to sell it.
Well, it was in Tank 7, so just call it Tank 7.
So they labeled it Tank 7, and they sold it, and it sold like hotcakes.
So they're like, wow. OK, whatever we just made there, let's figure it out and make it again.
And it is one of their best-selling beers. People love it.
So, interesting, huh?
Yeah.
Yep. All righty. I guess we're going to go ahead and shut this bitch down and put a little bow on it, right?
Yeah, I got some dogs I got akin to.
Oh yeah, that's right. All righty, everybody.
I'm going to sit and put my neighbors tonight.
Well, that's cool. It's a French bulldog and something else, huh?
Yeah, I don't know what he is, but he's a big, beautiful dog.
Oh, that's cool. All right.
He's a gentle giant, yeah.
They usually are, aren't they?
Yeah.
All right. Rob, have a good night. Everybody, thank you for joining us.
Good night, assholes.
Oh no. Looks like the show's over, kids.
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.
Fear not, assholes. They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.