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And now it's time for the Daily Dishbag Lunch.

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Two douchebags and a microphone pledge. I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to download every show.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to grab family members phones and download the show from there.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to go to public computers and download the show from there.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to laugh at all the unfunny jokes.

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I, Joe, or Jane listener hereby promise to lie to all my friends and tell them how good the show is.

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And finally, I, Joe, or Jane listener promise to visit Montrose, Missouri to take advantage of the power plant,

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campgrounds, and junkyard all within its quarter-mile radius.

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Here at Two Douchebags and a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.

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Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.

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Not like all those other guys. We can and will lie if it makes the story better.

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Two douchebags and a microphone.

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We talk.

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And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

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Hmm, let's see. If I identify as a dog and I start wandering around the block without a collar on,

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could animal control come by and pick me up?

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Hmm. I may never know.

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Two douchebags and a microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.

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We offer you first-world problems.

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I can't believe the toffee grinder is broke at the big box store.

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There's no way I can be expected to grind my coffee beans every damn morning.

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Next time you take a dump, listen to Two Douchebags and a Microphone.

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It's been proven in laboratory rats to relax your anal canal. Get in cover.

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Hey there, fuckstick. You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.

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A belly dancer in Spain.

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A belly dancer for 48 hours beating the old world record by five hours.

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Two douchebags and a microphone. I'm Mark.

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And I'm Rob.

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Good evening, Rob. How you doing on this fine Saturday night, rather toasty Saturday night?

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Oh, God is it toast. I'm toast, dude.

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Yeah, it's putt weather.

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I'm in the everywhere store. I'm out and about today.

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Oh yeah, let's check the putts weather.

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Yeah, I'm doing good.

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Real nut drencher.

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Why is this going good?

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That's good to hear.

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Good.

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All right. Yeah, today was a real nut drencher because not only the heat, the humidity too.

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Both of them all together makes a nut drencher.

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So anyhow, and we'll have plenty more.

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We got more rain coming in for the week.

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Yes, it is swamp ass season in case anyone knows.

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So anyhow, swamp ass is the sweat that you gather on your ass.

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And it sucks. It can chafe you. It's just annoying and all this stuff.

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So bring out your gold bonds, whatever you got to do,

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because you have to do everything you can to battle swamp ass.

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You know, the butt sweat, baby powder, the butt sweats are horrible.

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And I don't wish that on any man.

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So, well, there might be a couple I wish it on, but most men I do not wish that on.

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So anyhow, the butt sweats is horrible.

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You get swamp ass and your day is ruined, isn't it?

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Yeah, definitely.

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All right. So let's get into this.

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So it appears that Bob Rock, the famous producer of many huge 80s bands,

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was hired to help Motley with their new music.

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Bob had some help from AI, allegedly, according to many different sources.

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No wonder it doesn't sound like anything Motley ever would compose.

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Rumor has it they are.

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You can tell just by listening to it that it's not from them at all.

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Even with Mick gone, you think there'd be some resemblance of their, you know, decent music.

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But no, rumor has it they chatbot already took out a restraining order against the music.

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A restraining order against Tommy Lee.

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All right.

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What?

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Rumor has it.

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Repeat that.

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Repeat that.

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Rumor has it the chatbot AI already took out a restraining order against Tommy Lee.

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Well, that wouldn't be the first person.

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It would, but no.

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It would not.

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Just in a long line of just in a long line of restraining orders.

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So, I think this is the first one and only time I will read for AI.

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Me too.

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I was just sitting there waiting for it.

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As soon as you heard it and let it sink in, I'm just sitting there going, wait for it, wait for it.

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And you're like, what?

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So anyhow, so.

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Okay.

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All right.

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So as I told everybody.

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Good times.

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Yep.

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There's going to be a humdinger of a show, right?

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A humdinger?

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Oh.

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Yeah.

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Oh, well, whatever.

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Whatever the hell a humdinger is.

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Yeah, go on.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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As I told everybody last podcast, I was going to the audiologist in hopes of helping me either

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rid myself of tinnitus or significantly reducing the noise level.

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Okay.

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So there are many options.

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One is retraining your mind to not hear the ringing.

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You see, I'm thinking this therapy could really help Motley fans right now.

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They could train.

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Yeah, they could train themselves to not hear it.

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Like I'm going to attempt to train myself not to hear tinnitus.

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No, on a serious level, this is what a lot of people are doing now because insurance

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doesn't cover the newest stuff, the tongue stimulation and all that.

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Not yet, at least.

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So it's like really pricey.

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It's like you have to rent this thing for like over a thousand dollars a month.

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And it's been working, but it doesn't work all the time.

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So you spend all this money, it doesn't work.

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You're screwed, right?

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So they have different sorts of therapies.

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They don't have a way to get rid of it per se, but they have this therapy and it works

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really well with most people where you train your mind, just bypass it.

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You don't even know it's there.

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It's there, but you don't know.

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And I found that very interesting.

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And the success rate on that is about 70%, which I consider very good.

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I will try it for a 70% success ratio.

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And insurance will cover that, so I'm not out that much if it doesn't work.

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So anyhow, but yeah, if you've been a victim of the new Motley crew,

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I suggest you hunt these people down that we train you to not hear something

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and put in that song and make sure that they train you not to hear it.

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That's my best suggestion.

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What do you think?

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Nah, I totally agree.

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If you were subject to accidentally hearing that garbage,

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please consult an audiologist immediately.

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And that's because we care here, two douchebags and a microphone.

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So I'll say I'm taking your word for it.

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I haven't listened to it.

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You don't want to.

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You said not to.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Don't waste your three minutes or whatever the hell it is.

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Don't waste that three minutes of your life.

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You can pick your nuts and get more out of it.

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So yeah, don't waste your free data.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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There you go.

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That's an even better reason.

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Don't waste your free data.

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Someone in Africa needs that data right now,

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and you're wasting it on that Motley song.

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Yes.

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Definitely.

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So I want you to think about that next time you have a handful of data

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and nothing to do with it.

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Yeah.

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People in Africa need to listen to us.

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Yeah.

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Sally Struthers.

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Everybody around the world needs to listen to us.

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Sally Struthers is going to be on this really soon, the data.

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Yeah.

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Yep.

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Anyhow, I hear she's a listener.

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I hear she's a listener.

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Is she still alive?

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I don't know.

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I'll check in a minute after the monologue, OK?

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Well, if not, she's doing it in depth.

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She listens in depth because that's what kind of program we have.

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Yes.

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Yeah.

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Oh, yeah.

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She would definitely love us.

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Yep.

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So that's how come my dad quit speaking to me from beyond.

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Why wouldn't she love us?

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Yeah.

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Anyway, that works with Rob Reiner, that greasy toad.

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Absolutely.

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All right.

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They would love us.

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Do what?

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I said they would love us, yeah.

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Oh, hell yeah.

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Yeah.

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Do it.

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Hell yeah.

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And Carol O'Connor, if he was still alive,

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and who the hell was Edith Bunker?

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Damn, I can't think of her name.

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They would all love us too.

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Uh, yeah.

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Damn it.

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She is so famous.

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Lost it.

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OK.

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Anyhow, them both listen to us in the great beyond,

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and have by a really, really good source in the great beyond.

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So there you go.

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Meanwhile, Chief Speedy first round draft pick Xavier Worthy

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was not fast enough to catch the thief who stole his car.

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That's right.

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I did not hear those things.

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It's true.

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That's right.

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Mr. Worthy's car was stolen.

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Now he has to compete in the obstacle course while criminals

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are shooting at him, and he will officially be a Kansas Cityan.

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Then he will be Kansas City ready.

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You know?

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And you know, I mean, you know, just act like there's not really

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a high number of shooting victims, and you kind of keep

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your head down.

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If you get through that, then, well, there you go.

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You are a Kansas Cityan.

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I heard that Rashi Rice might have taken Xavier's car

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because he cannot rent cars for right now.

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Just speculation.

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Just speculation.

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All right.

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Speaking of Kansas City short.

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I'm sorry.

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I had to mute you on that one.

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Did you spit out your drink?

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Was that what that sound was?

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Oh, yeah.

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I had to mute you on that one.

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I'm sorry.

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I laughed too hard.

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Yeah, you know, Rashi Rice, he can't rent a car.

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So he probably, it's probably a misunderstanding.

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Wow.

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Dude, that was the metal spoon to the nuts.

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Dude, that was the metal spoon to the nuts.

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Yes, it was.

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Oh, no, no, it was tongs.

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You know what I'm talking about.

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Metal tongs to the nuts.

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Whatever.

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Oh, those little metal crabbers.

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Oh, shit, they're bad.

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Oh, yeah.

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Those were the big old, the big metal spoon.

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The metal tongs.

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What I like to do back in the days,

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I take a tong to the nuts

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and a metal spoon to the ass.

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Depending on which way they're facing.

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Yeah.

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Yeah, if they're facing me, then they get the tongs to the nuts.

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If they're not facing me,

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they get the metal spoon to the ass.

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Then when they turn around to say something to me,

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then they get the tongs to the nuts.

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Perfect crime.

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All right.

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Speaking of Kansas City shortcomings,

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seems as though the ransomware attack

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got a lock on the property deeds.

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And I'm not joking you.

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This is not a joke.

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I know we're goofing around here.

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But the ransomware locked up the property deeds, Rob.

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The property deeds.

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And you know how they wash these things?

261
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,520
Yes.

262
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:38,520
I was telling about the ransomware

263
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,520
last week, I believe.

264
00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,520
And they locked up Kansas City.

265
00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:44,520
They, um,

266
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,520
and anyhow, they're online hackers

267
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:48,520
and they want money to give us

268
00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:50,520
our website back.

269
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:52,520
Okay. So.

270
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:54,520
Yeah, yeah. I remember you mentioning that.

271
00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:56,520
Yeah. They got the property deeds section

272
00:12:56,520 --> 00:12:58,520
of this website.

273
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:00,520
Oh, God.

274
00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:02,520
You talk about some fucked up stuff, dude.

275
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,520
Oh.

276
00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,520
Nobody has heard nearly the end of this yet.

277
00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:08,520
No one has.

278
00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:10,520
Unfortunately.

279
00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:12,520
You know, the criminals really

280
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:14,520
need to check Jackson County

281
00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:16,520
tax code before trying to steal someone's house.

282
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:18,520
Don't you think?

283
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,520
I'm staying out of it.

284
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:22,520
They go somewhere.

285
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,520
They go, how much tax?

286
00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:26,520
I'm staying out of it.

287
00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:28,520
They're going to go, let's see.

288
00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:30,520
We steal this house here and we got to pay that many taxes.

289
00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,520
Fuck you guys.

290
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,520
Let's go to Cass County.

291
00:13:34,520 --> 00:13:36,520
Alright, let's go lock up their shit.

292
00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:38,520
But they're too smart to let it happen.

293
00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:40,520
Jackson County? Well, yeah.

294
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,520
Okay.

295
00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:44,520
The crimes they would have to commit.

296
00:13:44,520 --> 00:13:46,520
You see, even the criminals don't want to

297
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:48,520
commit that many crimes to pay

298
00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:50,520
the taxes in Jackson County.

299
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:52,520
They're smart enough.

300
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:54,520
You know how many banks we have to rob?

301
00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,520
So they're like, no, we're out.

302
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,520
So, Pepsi has come out with blue.

303
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:00,520
Yeah, you guessed it.

304
00:14:00,520 --> 00:14:02,520
The Star Wars blue.

305
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:04,520
Like all the other reeds.

306
00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,520
You're whipping all the way around, aren't you?

307
00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:08,520
Well, you ought to see tomorrow's monologue.

308
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:10,520
There's a lot of it written out already.

309
00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:12,520
Tomorrow might be worse.

310
00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:14,520
Yeah, be ready for it.

311
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,520
Pepsi with blue food coloring.

312
00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:18,520
So is Pepsi with blue food coloring in it?

313
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:20,520
Damn it, you're making me laugh, Rob.

314
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:22,520
Alright, okay.

315
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,520
Pepsi with blue food coloring in it

316
00:14:24,520 --> 00:14:26,520
is what it is basically.

317
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,520
This is a salute to the famous blue milk in Star Wars.

318
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:30,520
Okay, Star Wars nerds,

319
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,520
me and the cool kids are going to catch you after school

320
00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:34,520
and give you a swirly and a silly

321
00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,520
and a silly

322
00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:38,520
and a silly

323
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:40,520
that will crush your chickpea looking balls.

324
00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:42,520
Right?

325
00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:44,520
We've already given them a mass battle.

326
00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:46,520
Yes, yes.

327
00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:48,520
We're going to give them a snuggie

328
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,520
where the underwear band is wrapped around the back of their head.

329
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:56,520
And then while they're battling their underwear,

330
00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,520
we're going to stick their head in the toilet

331
00:14:58,520 --> 00:15:00,520
and give them a swirly.

332
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:02,520
Because they're nerds.

333
00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:04,520
We're going back to the 80s.

334
00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,520
They're nerds and we're not.

335
00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:08,520
We beat up nerds.

336
00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,520
We're going back to the 80s.

337
00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:12,520
Yes, we are. Only a certain amount of people will get this and I apologize.

338
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:14,520
Alright.

339
00:15:14,520 --> 00:15:16,520
Oreo is jumping on the blue bandwagon as well.

340
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:18,520
Yep, you guessed it.

341
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:20,520
Wait for it.

342
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:22,520
Blue Oreo filling

343
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,520
in the middle.

344
00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:26,520
Filling.

345
00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:28,520
So I'm buying stock in FDC blue food coloring.

346
00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:30,520
I can see the writing on the wall right now.

347
00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:32,520
They're going to use quite a bit of it.

348
00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:34,520
And you know,

349
00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:36,520
because there's a lot of rubes out there.

350
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:38,520
We'll buy anything with blue food coloring in it right now.

351
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,520
Because they want to be trendy Star Wars guy.

352
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:42,520
And finally,

353
00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:44,520
Blue Bell has a new flavor coming out soon.

354
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,520
It's an A&W Float flavored ice cream.

355
00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:48,520
Mmm.

356
00:15:48,520 --> 00:15:50,520
It sounds good, don't it?

357
00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:52,520
Oh, damn.

358
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:54,520
Yeah.

359
00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:56,520
Fuck yeah.

360
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,520
Instant fucking wood on that one.

361
00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:02,520
So wow.

362
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,520
Do you remember the A&W that used to be in Belton?

363
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,520
Yes.

364
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:08,520
Yes, I do.

365
00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:10,520
It was on North Scott down towards the end.

366
00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:12,520
Yeah, that place was good.

367
00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:14,520
I was a little...

368
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:16,520
Right down there by Wolf's Holy Dation.

369
00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,520
Yes. Yeah, I remember that.

370
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,520
Yeah, I was a little kid, man.

371
00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:22,520
Yeah, so was I.

372
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:24,520
I remember my mom and dad taking me there all the time.

373
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,520
Oh, yeah, yeah.

374
00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:28,520
We would get root beer float and an order of onion rings.

375
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,520
And I was in heaven.

376
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,520
Didn't they have the...

377
00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,520
I just needed root beer float.

378
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:36,520
I got them both.

379
00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:38,520
What can I say?

380
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:40,520
I yelled enough.

381
00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,520
Yeah.

382
00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:44,520
I probably got my ass beat too.

383
00:16:44,520 --> 00:16:46,520
But, oh well.

384
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:48,520
At least I got the float and the onion rings.

385
00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:50,520
So, okay.

386
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:52,520
So, wow.

387
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,520
I don't have to spend 40 seconds out of my life

388
00:16:54,520 --> 00:16:56,520
actually making a root beer float.

389
00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:58,520
You know what, Rob?

390
00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,520
I smell a brand new First World Problems

391
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,520
coming right up.

392
00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:04,520
Alright.

393
00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:06,520
Having to make your float.

394
00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,520
And that is all of the opening monologue,

395
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,520
if you will.

396
00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:12,520
Or we can call it the first thoughts

397
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,520
or the shit

398
00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:16,520
or the steaming pile of shit to start things

399
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:18,520
or whatever.

400
00:17:18,520 --> 00:17:20,520
So, Rob, we turn to you.

401
00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:22,520
The first third.

402
00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:24,520
There we go.

403
00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,520
And once again, we turn to Rob

404
00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:28,520
to save the program.

405
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:32,520
Okay, I think I have

406
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:34,520
found the douchiest dude

407
00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:36,520
pretty much ever.

408
00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:38,520
Wow. Okay.

409
00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:40,520
That takes a lot of douchiness.

410
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,520
No.

411
00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:46,520
No.

412
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,520
He's not...

413
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:50,520
He's no douche.

414
00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:52,520
Wow.

415
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,520
A woman on Reddit was

416
00:17:54,520 --> 00:17:56,520
devastated after her boyfriend

417
00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,520
of nearly seven years

418
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:00,520
abruptly left her,

419
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:02,520
moved

420
00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:04,520
hundreds of miles away,

421
00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:06,520
and refused to talk to her.

422
00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:10,520
However, in my...

423
00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:12,520
I blame it on feminine

424
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:14,520
odor. That's what I blame it on.

425
00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:16,520
No, go ahead. No.

426
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,520
No. Okay.

427
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,520
I'm blaming it on him.

428
00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:22,520
Okay.

429
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:24,520
However, a month

430
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:26,520
after a month,

431
00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:28,520
he reached out to her and

432
00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:30,520
claimed that he simply panicked

433
00:18:30,520 --> 00:18:32,520
and ran away.

434
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,520
Okay.

435
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:38,520
Apparently, I was asking

436
00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:40,520
too many questions about the

437
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:42,520
future.

438
00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:44,520
If he ever wanted to get married,

439
00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:46,520
what he thought about children,

440
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:48,520
etc.

441
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,520
I also pushed him a lot

442
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:52,520
to finally finish his degree

443
00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:54,520
and get a job.

444
00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:56,520
And all that's bad?

445
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,520
His main

446
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,520
source of income

447
00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:02,520
are still his parents.

448
00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:04,520
He said he just

449
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:06,520
couldn't handle it

450
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,520
and saw his life

451
00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:10,520
as being over

452
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:12,520
and needed to get away from it

453
00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:14,520
all straight. Okay.

454
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,520
I smell a zeer

455
00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:18,520
or millennial here all over this place.

456
00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:20,520
It just reeks of

457
00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:22,520
millennial or zeer,

458
00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:24,520
doesn't it?

459
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,520
Uh, yeah.

460
00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:28,520
It's not giving us age.

461
00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:30,520
Okay.

462
00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:32,520
Well, that would be my guess in my book.

463
00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:34,520
Yeah.

464
00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:36,520
I think I found a look.

465
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:38,520
Like the zeer...

466
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,520
After seven years of being together.

467
00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:42,520
Wow.

468
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,520
Okay.

469
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,520
You start asking about marriage and kids.

470
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:48,520
Seven years, man.

471
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,520
For some things, that's common law marriage.

472
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,520
I would expect

473
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,520
that to be asked

474
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,520
after seven years.

475
00:19:56,520 --> 00:19:58,520
I would not be like, oh, wait a minute,

476
00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:00,520
boy, you're getting a little too quick there.

477
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,520
I think she's had plenty of patience.

478
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:04,520
And then

479
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,520
he ran off.

480
00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:08,520
Yeah.

481
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:10,520
Did she take the idiot back or not?

482
00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:12,520
No. He's hundreds of miles away.

483
00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,520
Oh, okay.

484
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:16,520
What a dumbass.

485
00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:18,520
It scared him off.

486
00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:20,520
Seven years. It scared him off.

487
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,520
Um...

488
00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:24,520
I...

489
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:26,520
To be honest, I think this guy

490
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:28,520
needs to go see a doctor.

491
00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:30,520
Hang on. We can put him on the next

492
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:32,520
Ask Padlin list. How's that?

493
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,520
Do you have a name?

494
00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:36,520
No.

495
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:38,520
It does not give names to this whole

496
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,520
thing. Okay, I'm just going to put him down as

497
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:42,520
guy who ran off on marriage.

498
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:44,520
So he's going to get an Ask Padlin.

499
00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,520
Do you agree?

500
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:48,520
Yeah. I found this on

501
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:50,520
Pop Crush.

502
00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:52,520
Okay. Let's see.

503
00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:54,520
Padlin...

504
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:56,520
guy

505
00:20:56,520 --> 00:20:58,520
that

506
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:00,520
took

507
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:02,520
off.

508
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,520
Hopefully I remember what that means.

509
00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:06,520
If I don't, he will not be on the Ask Padlin.

510
00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:08,520
Speaking of Ask Padlins, you know I have some here.

511
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:12,520
We may or may not get to them.

512
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,520
Yeah. We can get...

513
00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:16,520
Yeah.

514
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:18,520
We'll see how the rest of the program goes.

515
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:20,520
Let's go ahead and take a first break.

516
00:21:20,520 --> 00:21:22,520
I'm a little honoree tonight.

517
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:24,520
Just saying.

518
00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,520
Yeah.

519
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:28,520
The way the opening monologue took out

520
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,520
I think that we're both in a little

521
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:32,520
honoree. All I gotta say

522
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:34,520
is if this one was honoree, the next one's going to be a lot

523
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,520
worse, I do believe.

524
00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,520
Okay.

525
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:40,520
Anyhow, we're going to take our first break

526
00:21:40,520 --> 00:22:04,520
and we will be right back.

527
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:12,520
Now, from his underground bunker

528
00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:14,520
camped in Missouri,

529
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:16,520
stocked full of dried goods,

530
00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:18,520
canned food, and a couple of vibrating

531
00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:20,520
toys, is

532
00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:22,520
Ramblings of a Madman featuring

533
00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,520
Rob Rad.

534
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:26,520
My mechanic told me I

535
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:28,520
couldn't repair your brakes.

536
00:22:28,520 --> 00:22:30,520
So I made you one ladder.

537
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:32,520
Good job.

538
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:34,520
Have you ever wondered

539
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:36,520
where something came about?

540
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:38,520
Have you ever looked at something and said,

541
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:40,520
I wonder what the origin of that is?

542
00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:42,520
Well, so have we.

543
00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:44,520
That's why we give you

544
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:46,520
The Origin of...

545
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:48,520
This is The Origin of

546
00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:50,520
Beer. The first beer

547
00:22:50,520 --> 00:22:52,520
in the world was brewed by the ancient Chinese

548
00:22:52,520 --> 00:22:54,520
around the year 7000 BC.

549
00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:56,520
It is known there as Kui.

550
00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:58,520
In the West, however, the process

551
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,520
was recognized as beer brewing began in

552
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:02,520
the Mesopotamia at the Godin

553
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,520
Temple settlement now in modern

554
00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:06,520
day Iran between 3500

555
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:08,520
and 3100 BC.

556
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:12,520
It's not entirely clear whether he had

557
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,520
a light version or even a craft beer version

558
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,520
of this. Just saying.

559
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,520
Hey look,

560
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:20,520
I think we found land.

561
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:22,520
Oh my god, I think we're safe.

562
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,520
Oh no!

563
00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:26,520
It's the island of horrible jokes.

564
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:28,520
Look at that!

565
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,520
Look at that!

566
00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:32,520
Elevator music is horrible.

567
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,520
On so many

568
00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:36,520
levels.

569
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:44,520
The apocalypse just happened.

570
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:46,520
You don't know what to do.

571
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:48,520
You don't know where to go.

572
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:50,520
But we can tell you what you can eat.

573
00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:54,520
Hi all, this is Mark here.

574
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:56,520
I'm usually the one telling you what to eat

575
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:58,520
during an apocalypse.

576
00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,520
Well, this time I decided to

577
00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:02,520
go the other way.

578
00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:04,520
You ever consider just going to Ground Zero

579
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:06,520
and saying fuck it? Do you really want to be the guy

580
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:08,520
running around looking for radioactive

581
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:10,520
deer, guessing whether

582
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:12,520
water is not contaminated or not?

583
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,520
No food, no shelter, no nothing.

584
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,520
Oh no, there's a strong argument

585
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,520
that says, you know what, let's

586
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:20,520
just go to Ground Zero and see what's

587
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:22,520
for us after.

588
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:24,520
Just a thought.

589
00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,520
Like stated before,

590
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:28,520
if you believe anything

591
00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,520
we say or think this

592
00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:32,520
podcast anything other

593
00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:34,520
than hyperbole,

594
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,520
parody,

595
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:38,520
and just plain stupidness,

596
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,520
you're dumber than us.

597
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,520
And that's hard to beat.

598
00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:46,520
Two douchebags in a

599
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:48,520
microphone invade your ear holes

600
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:50,520
and, hey,

601
00:24:50,520 --> 00:25:04,520
I took a dump in the cooler.

602
00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:06,520
And we are back. This is

603
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:08,520
Two Douchebags in a Microphone Podcast.

604
00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:12,520
Okay, well, they did a study about

605
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:14,520
people working, okay.

606
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:16,520
And one of the biggest complaints

607
00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:18,520
that people have is

608
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,520
passive aggressive behavior.

609
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:24,520
And I think

610
00:25:24,520 --> 00:25:26,520
passive aggressive is where you're

611
00:25:26,520 --> 00:25:28,520
acting like

612
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:30,520
something isn't a big deal

613
00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:32,520
and you're acting on it, but you're acting like

614
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:34,520
that's not what you're doing

615
00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:36,520
whatever for, you know what I mean? Kind of

616
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:38,520
passive aggressive.

617
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,520
It's like, oh, it's okay, and then they secretly

618
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:42,520
do some stupid shit behind your

619
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,520
back or something like that.

620
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:46,520
Right?

621
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:48,520
Yeah. Yeah.

622
00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:50,520
So, it's one of the biggest complaints

623
00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:52,520
about workplaces,

624
00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:54,520
okay.

625
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:56,520
So, anyhow, they did a little study here

626
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,520
and they said passive

627
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,520
aggressive behavior

628
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:02,520
can make others very uncomfortable,

629
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:04,520
create tension, and even jeopardize your job.

630
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,520
Some signs of passive aggressive

631
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,520
behavior include

632
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:10,520
giving you a backhanded compliment.

633
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:12,520
Like, let's say

634
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:14,520
you're really overweight,

635
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:16,520
okay.

636
00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,520
And anyhow, someone goes,

637
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:20,520
oh, I see you lost a little

638
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:22,520
weight.

639
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,520
That could be kind of a backhanded compliment.

640
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:28,520
Or, that's the nicest thing I've seen

641
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,520
you wear, and it's not that

642
00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,520
great, you know what I mean? And then

643
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:34,520
the reason I do that is, if you come

644
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:36,520
back at them, they're going to go, I was

645
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,520
just giving you a compliment, I don't know what the problem

646
00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:40,520
is, right? That's what they do.

647
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,520
If someone's passive

648
00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:44,520
aggressive, when you call them on to go,

649
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,520
oh, I didn't mean it like that, right?

650
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,520
Right.

651
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:50,520
Okay. So,

652
00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:52,520
like I said, backhanded compliment,

653
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:54,520
giving you the silent treatment,

654
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:56,520
indirectly refusing your

655
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:58,520
request,

656
00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:00,520
sarcasm,

657
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:02,520
gossiping behind your back,

658
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,520
procrastination,

659
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,520
and missing deadlines.

660
00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:08,520
Now, I've worked with all forms of

661
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:10,520
That's me. Procrastination, that's me.

662
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:12,520
Okay. I admit.

663
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,520
No, you're not doing it passive aggressive, though. I know

664
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:16,520
you. If you've got a problem with someone, you're going to say it

665
00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:18,520
to them. You're going to go, hey man, can I speak to you?

666
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:20,520
No, you better believe it. Yeah, you're going to go, and I

667
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:22,520
do too. You're like, hey, can I speak to you?

668
00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:24,520
You don't do it in front of people. Yeah, you

669
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,520
don't do it in front of people. You gather them

670
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,520
aside, and you have to be kid gloves,

671
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:30,520
and act like you don't think

672
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:32,520
it's passive aggressive. Just go, yeah, hey,

673
00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:34,520
this just bothers me, you

674
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:36,520
know, and you just kind of leave it like

675
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:38,520
just the way it is. And that's

676
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:40,520
the best way to deal with it, I've found.

677
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:42,520
Because I've been around these motherfuckers

678
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,520
all my life. Luckily, I don't work

679
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:46,520
with people like that right now. Everyone's

680
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:48,520
pretty civil and good, and they don't

681
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:50,520
do that, but in my last job, there was

682
00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:52,520
a lot of bullshit like that going on, a lot

683
00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:54,520
of fucking idiots, and I'll go into that a little bit later.

684
00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:56,520
Here are some tips for dealing

685
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,520
with passive aggressive behavior.

686
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:00,520
Speak to them privately.

687
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:02,520
Okay, I already said that.

688
00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:04,520
Give concrete examples of the behavior

689
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:06,520
you've witnessed in them. Yes.

690
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:08,520
Yeah, and don't fluctuate. Go, this is

691
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,520
what you did, and then

692
00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:12,520
let them, and then if they try to weasel

693
00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,520
out of it, go, okay, that's fine and dandy, but

694
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:16,520
this is what you did. So could

695
00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:18,520
you not do that anymore instead of telling

696
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:20,520
me, oh, I'm sorry, you know, I

697
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:22,520
didn't mean to. Now, I don't want to hear

698
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:24,520
you didn't mean to. I want to hear you say

699
00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:26,520
you're not going to do it again, right?

700
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:28,520
Because

701
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:30,520
whether you meant to or not is irrelevant.

702
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:32,520
As long as you stop it is what's relevant.

703
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,520
So, tell them

704
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:36,520
how you interpreted it, and that goes

705
00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:38,520
with that right there. Go, look, okay, you say

706
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,520
you didn't mean it, okay, leave you.

707
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,520
Don't do it again. Now you know.

708
00:28:42,520 --> 00:28:44,520
So, leave out

709
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:46,520
any accusatory language.

710
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:48,520
Yes, that's very important.

711
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:50,520
You kind of just blame

712
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,520
it on yourself. Then that

713
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,520
person feels like, oh, okay, well, he didn't

714
00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:56,520
catch on, or whatever passive

715
00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:58,520
aggressive people do. You know, they're

716
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:00,520
kind of like, okay, alright, well, I guess I'll drop

717
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,520
it then. He, you know, he's blaming it

718
00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:04,520
on himself. No harm, no foul.

719
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:06,520
Don't label them

720
00:29:06,520 --> 00:29:08,520
or their behavior as passive

721
00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:10,520
aggressive. I learned that.

722
00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:12,520
I learned that. You don't ever call it passive

723
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:14,520
aggressive, because then

724
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:16,520
they get real, oh,

725
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:18,520
they get real defensive and pissy

726
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:20,520
because they know you're right, and

727
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:22,520
they know you caught them. So,

728
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:24,520
okay,

729
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:26,520
ask them

730
00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:28,520
direct questions, which is so

731
00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:30,520
true. Go, the other day,

732
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:32,520
did you say this in front of

733
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:34,520
everybody? Yes

734
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:36,520
or no? And if they say no,

735
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,520
then, you know, you can take it however you want.

736
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:40,520
You can go to the people and go, hey,

737
00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:42,520
you know, well, let's go talk to these people

738
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:44,520
because they said that you said it,

739
00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:46,520
or whatever the deal is.

740
00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:48,520
So, acknowledge

741
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,520
the underlying issue, which is true.

742
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:54,520
Give them an opportunity

743
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:56,520
to explain their behavior and tell

744
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:58,520
you any needs that they

745
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:00,520
may have. So, you give them an

746
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:02,520
opportunity to go, yeah, I've been like

747
00:30:02,520 --> 00:30:04,520
this, and here's what the problem is. Can we

748
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:06,520
work together and figure this out?

749
00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:08,520
And then, you know, it's up to you both,

750
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,520
and a lot of passive aggressive people

751
00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:12,520
actually like that. They're like, well,

752
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:14,520
he's working with me. Okay, this is cool.

753
00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:16,520
We're talking it out. So,

754
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:18,520
that's a good method. And then, finally,

755
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:20,520
say something like, you made a good point

756
00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:22,520
in that exchange, and that is

757
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:24,520
positive reinforcement,

758
00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,520
and that makes passive aggressive people feel

759
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:28,520
good, and they back down

760
00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,520
quite a bit on it. You go, you know, that's a good point,

761
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,520
but here's what I'm talking about, or whatever.

762
00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,520
So, you don't just pooh-pooh what they're saying

763
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:36,520
off, and you don't act

764
00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:38,520
like they're all of it. So,

765
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:40,520
I think this is great advice. So,

766
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:42,520
anyhow, there was this certain HR

767
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:44,520
lady at my old job. She

768
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:46,520
was the most passive aggressive person

769
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:48,520
I'd ever met in my life.

770
00:30:48,520 --> 00:30:50,520
I was just flat ignoring it for quite

771
00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:52,520
a while, but I eventually figured out that

772
00:30:52,520 --> 00:30:54,520
the key to handling her was, if

773
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:56,520
it was something you really needed, he had to

774
00:30:56,520 --> 00:30:58,520
feed her huge ego.

775
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:00,520
I would go in and blame an issue on me

776
00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:02,520
and not her. For example, a

777
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:04,520
misrequest for vacation, I

778
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:06,520
would blame myself for forgetting to turn it in.

779
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:08,520
I wouldn't go, hey, I turned this in, and

780
00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:10,520
you didn't, you didn't

781
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,520
get it back to me,

782
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:14,520
and now I can't take off, and now I got this,

783
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:16,520
you know, I got plane tickets, or whatever.

784
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:18,520
Okay? You go, man,

785
00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:20,520
you know what, I think I must have done it.

786
00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:22,520
And then, she would go, okay,

787
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:24,520
and then grant it. But if you went in there

788
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:26,520
and said, hey man, you missed this?

789
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:28,520
Oh no, that did not happen.

790
00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:30,520
So,

791
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:32,520
I would act like it was the

792
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:34,520
check service, if they

793
00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:36,520
missed some payroll stuff,

794
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:38,520
like

795
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:40,520
like, no,

796
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:42,520
missing overtime was a big issue,

797
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:44,520
and then she'd be like, oh,

798
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:46,520
I didn't see that, or whatever, and go, yeah,

799
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:48,520
I'm sure it's a payroll check, they

800
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:50,520
didn't catch it. And then, that would

801
00:31:50,520 --> 00:31:52,520
work really well. And then, she'd go off

802
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:54,520
thinking, haha, you know, but

803
00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:56,520
I know different. Okay,

804
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:58,520
you know, so I would do something like

805
00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:00,520
that, you know, and then,

806
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:02,520
if you went further and said, you know what, this

807
00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:04,520
has happened three paychecks in a row,

808
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:06,520
you missing my overtime, or whatever

809
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:08,520
it is, and then, I went to

810
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:10,520
school for this, and it's like,

811
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:12,520
fine, could you maybe work a little

812
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:14,520
bit better then, and act like you learned

813
00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:16,520
something in school? But, I would never

814
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:18,520
do that, I learned how to deal with her.

815
00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:20,520
I felt talked down to, but the funny thing

816
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:22,520
is, I always got what I needed to have

817
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:24,520
done, ego stroking,

818
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:26,520
that simple.

819
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:28,520
So, you know what,

820
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:30,520
you guys can deal with it however you want, but that's

821
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:32,520
my experiences with it.

822
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:34,520
And, like I said, at my old job, that was

823
00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:36,520
a big issue, because this

824
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,520
person was very, very sensitive,

825
00:32:38,520 --> 00:32:40,520
and talked, and didn't

826
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,520
think that you knew nearly as much as her.

827
00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:44,520
As a matter of fact, when

828
00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:46,520
you walked into the office, you could feel a big,

829
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:48,520
oh no, one of the peons is in there.

830
00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:50,520
So,

831
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:52,520
anyhow, so,

832
00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:54,520
alright Rob, we turn to you.

833
00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:56,520
Alright.

834
00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:00,520
Uh,

835
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,520
I'm gonna go up into Canada

836
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,520
here, but it

837
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:06,520
has to do with McDonald's too, so.

838
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:08,520
Yeah, okay.

839
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,520
Yeah.

840
00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:12,520
A teen visit to a McDonald's

841
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:14,520
to collect what he thought

842
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:16,520
a free meal was

843
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:18,520
less stunned when he was hit

844
00:33:18,520 --> 00:33:20,520
with a fine for hundreds

845
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:22,520
of dollars.

846
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,520
Mason Prima, 18,

847
00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:28,520
uh,

848
00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:30,520
Saskoon,

849
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:32,520
Saskatchewan, right? Saskatchewan.

850
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:34,520
Yeah, well

851
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,520
no, it's not

852
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:38,520
Saskatchewan.

853
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:40,520
Oh well, um, Northern Canada,

854
00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:42,520
just say Northern Canada.

855
00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:44,520
Told

856
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:46,520
CTV News, he was

857
00:33:46,520 --> 00:33:48,520
pulled over while going

858
00:33:48,520 --> 00:33:50,520
through the drive-through at

859
00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:52,520
a McDonald's.

860
00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:54,520
I'm barely

861
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:56,520
even moving.

862
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,520
I pulled up my app and

863
00:33:58,520 --> 00:34:00,520
looked at my rear view mirror

864
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,520
and there's a motorcycle

865
00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:04,520
cop behind me,

866
00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:06,520
he told the outlet.

867
00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:08,520
He initially didn't

868
00:34:08,520 --> 00:34:10,520
think twice about using the app

869
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,520
on his phone while

870
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:14,520
at the window at, while

871
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:16,520
he was in the drive-through.

872
00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:18,520
And he needed

873
00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:20,520
to show proof he had

874
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:22,520
earned enough reward points

875
00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:24,520
for a free meal.

876
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:28,520
When the officer approached him

877
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:30,520
at the window, Prima

878
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:32,520
said he showed him he was

879
00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:34,520
on the fast food chain's

880
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:36,520
app in the process

881
00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:38,520
of pulling up

882
00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:40,520
a code.

883
00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:44,520
But

884
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,520
the cop still issued

885
00:34:46,520 --> 00:34:48,520
a

886
00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:50,520
$580

887
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,520
fine,

888
00:34:52,520 --> 00:34:54,520
which is $426

889
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:56,520
United States dollars.

890
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,520
Wow.

891
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:02,520
Are you kidding me?

892
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:04,520
Uh

893
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,520
You're in, that

894
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:08,520
private property, ain't it?

895
00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:10,520
Um, yeah, I would not

896
00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:12,520
think that the, that the policeman

897
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:14,520
would be able to enforce a ticket there.

898
00:35:14,520 --> 00:35:16,520
For using the app

899
00:35:16,520 --> 00:35:18,520
while in the drive-through.

900
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:20,520
Um, I hope that guy has enough money

901
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,520
to get a good lawyer.

902
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:24,520
Because I would not only sue them,

903
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:26,520
but I would sue them for damages. I would be like

904
00:35:26,520 --> 00:35:28,520
you know what, I had to miss today's work.

905
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,520
I'd even go, you know what,

906
00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:32,520
now whenever I see a policeman, I start

907
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:34,520
crying. I'd make shit up.

908
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:36,520
Oh my god.

909
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:38,520
Any asshole that would do that does not

910
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:40,520
need to be in a uniform.

911
00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:42,520
Bottom line.

912
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:44,520
So, wow.

913
00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:46,520
That's a rookie looking to make a name for himself.

914
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:48,520
Yeah, which is bullshit.

915
00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:50,520
Or you're bored.

916
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:52,520
Yeah.

917
00:35:52,520 --> 00:35:54,520
Yep. Uh, May, do you want to do some

918
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:56,520
ass paddlins or do you want to go into something else?

919
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:58,520
What do you think?

920
00:35:58,520 --> 00:36:00,520
After that? I think I'm ready after that.

921
00:36:00,520 --> 00:36:02,520
Alrighty. And how about if we do a

922
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:04,520
nipple yank, a nut flick,

923
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:06,520
and an ass cheek bite tomorrow?

924
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:08,520
You feel like doing that tomorrow?

925
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:10,520
Tomorrow night. Tomorrow night.

926
00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:12,520
You're on. Alright, you got it.

927
00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:14,520
Spit shake?

928
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:16,520
Pfft.

929
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:18,520
Alright, there we go.

930
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:20,520
Alright, ass padlins.

931
00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:22,520
Well, I gotta tell it.

932
00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:24,520
And this is what happened.

933
00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:26,520
Okay, this happened like maybe the fourth

934
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:28,520
episode ever. I'm not gonna say

935
00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:30,520
a word tonight. Okay.

936
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:32,520
Anyhow, Topher

937
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,520
and I came up with it and we're pretty proud

938
00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:36,520
of it. We're giggling. So anyhow, what happened

939
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:38,520
is, is him and I was on

940
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:40,520
vacation in Florida.

941
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:42,520
We were on the golf side and we're walking along

942
00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:44,520
the beautiful beach.

943
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:46,520
And the gentle

944
00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:48,520
breeze was blowing our hair back.

945
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:50,520
And the sun was glistening. The sun

946
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,520
coming up was glistening off

947
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:54,520
of our hair. It was just beautiful.

948
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,520
It was a tender moment, but

949
00:36:56,520 --> 00:36:58,520
Rob and his brothers say we were

950
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:00,520
holding hands. We were not. It was a tender

951
00:37:00,520 --> 00:37:02,520
moment, yes, but we were not.

952
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:04,520
We were not holding hands.

953
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:06,520
So we're walking

954
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:08,520
along and I stubbed my toe

955
00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:10,520
on something. I look back and

956
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:12,520
Topher goes, dude

957
00:37:12,520 --> 00:37:14,520
that's a genie bottle. And I go, hey it is not.

958
00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,520
There's no such thing as genies.

959
00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,520
Then I walk over there to see it

960
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:20,520
and it's like a genie bottle with a cork

961
00:37:20,520 --> 00:37:22,520
in it. I go, dude it looks like a genie

962
00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:24,520
bottle. So I undo the cork.

963
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:26,520
Poof. This genie comes out.

964
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:28,520
So it's like, alright, cool, alright.

965
00:37:28,520 --> 00:37:30,520
So the genie was very

966
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:32,520
condescending. He could not stand us.

967
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:34,520
He thought we were just heathens. And he

968
00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:36,520
was rolling his eyes as soon as he saw us.

969
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:38,520
And we're like, hey we get three wishes. And he goes,

970
00:37:38,520 --> 00:37:40,520
nope, no you do not. He said,

971
00:37:40,520 --> 00:37:42,520
you guys watch too much TV.

972
00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:44,520
You get one wish, one wish only.

973
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:46,520
I suggest you use it wisely.

974
00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:48,520
So Topher and I automatically

975
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,520
go, we want to be invisible so we can ask

976
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:52,520
paddle people that need it.

977
00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:54,520
The genie rolled his eyes

978
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:56,520
and very reluctantly

979
00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:58,520
granted us that wish once a month.

980
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:00,520
But lately we got the genie to

981
00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:02,520
agree because people are so stupid

982
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:04,520
anymore that we can do it

983
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:06,520
actually as

984
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:08,520
much as needed. So if we do it four

985
00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:10,520
times a month, the genie said that's fine.

986
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:12,520
So we're just having a lot

987
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:14,520
of people needing to ask padlins and we've got

988
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:16,520
to cover this. So.

989
00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:18,520
Alrighty.

990
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,520
All men that get faceless.

991
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:24,520
Agreed?

992
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:26,520
Does that actually happen?

993
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,520
Yeah, I went into that

994
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:30,520
article a couple of podcasts

995
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:32,520
ago.

996
00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:34,520
More and more men are getting faceless.

997
00:38:34,520 --> 00:38:36,520
I'm a man.

998
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:38,520
Every man that gets a facelift.

999
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:40,520
I don't do nothing.

1000
00:38:40,520 --> 00:38:42,520
Gene Simmons got a facelift.

1001
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:44,520
It was on his stupid show, right?

1002
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:46,520
He gets an ass paddle.

1003
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:48,520
Well, he's got money.

1004
00:38:48,520 --> 00:38:50,520
Well, anyhow, any man

1005
00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:52,520
that gets a facelift gets an automatic

1006
00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:54,520
ass paddling. And I'm debating

1007
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:56,520
on whether to do it bare assed or not. What do you

1008
00:38:56,520 --> 00:38:58,520
think?

1009
00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:00,520
Bare assed.

1010
00:39:00,520 --> 00:39:02,520
Oh.

1011
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:04,520
Yeah, what the hell.

1012
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:06,520
I'm in the one with the mood, yeah.

1013
00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:08,520
Alright, next one

1014
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:10,520
that gets an ass paddling. Avocado

1015
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,520
toast. Just because

1016
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:14,520
it's snobbish attitude.

1017
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:16,520
Don't you agree?

1018
00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:18,520
Yeah.

1019
00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:20,520
Yep. Yep.

1020
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:22,520
Avocado toast gets an ass paddling.

1021
00:39:22,520 --> 00:39:24,520
Well, I mean

1022
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:26,520
we don't have to bare ass it

1023
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:28,520
in one paddle and it will be smashed.

1024
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:30,520
Yeah.

1025
00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:32,520
So, the next

1026
00:39:32,520 --> 00:39:34,520
one. I'll tell you what. I'll give you the honor

1027
00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:36,520
since you brought it up.

1028
00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:38,520
Yep, any avocado toast around me

1029
00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:40,520
gets an ass paddle. One shot is

1030
00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:42,520
done, it's your shot.

1031
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:44,520
This is everybody's morning that likes avocado toast.

1032
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,520
You better eat it because if not I'm going to smash

1033
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:48,520
it with a board. And by the way

1034
00:39:48,520 --> 00:39:50,520
this is a replica of Old

1035
00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:52,520
Sparky which impacted

1036
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:54,520
my bottom quite a bit during my high school

1037
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,520
years at Cass Midway.

1038
00:39:56,520 --> 00:39:58,520
It is sitting in, or

1039
00:39:58,520 --> 00:40:00,520
at least it was, sitting in the trophy case

1040
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:02,520
of our numerous

1041
00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:04,520
state championships, 1A.

1042
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:06,520
And it's hanging

1043
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:08,520
in there the last I knew. And Old

1044
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:10,520
Sparky, he had a really good workout

1045
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:12,520
with us idiots. I mean, you know, us guys

1046
00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,520
did a lot of stupid shit. So we

1047
00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:16,520
got our asses, yeah

1048
00:40:16,520 --> 00:40:18,520
we got our asses beat quite a bit.

1049
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:20,520
It has got a big old long wooden handle

1050
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:22,520
and a big narrow long

1051
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:24,520
piece of wood with holes in it. Old

1052
00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:26,520
Sparky could gather a lot of steam

1053
00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:28,520
for your ass cheeks.

1054
00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:30,520
And it did not feel good.

1055
00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:32,520
So, we do all this with Old Sparky

1056
00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:34,520
so avocado toast

1057
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:36,520
doesn't have a chance against Old

1058
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:38,520
Sparky, wouldn't you say?

1059
00:40:38,520 --> 00:40:40,520
The problem is you guys are

1060
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:42,520
bored.

1061
00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:44,520
Yeah, yeah.

1062
00:40:44,520 --> 00:40:46,520
Yeah, I mean we're out there in the fucking

1063
00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:48,520
sticks, there's nothing to do.

1064
00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:50,520
Yeah, you're bored. I know.

1065
00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:52,520
That's why I love you so much.

1066
00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:54,520
That's why I love you so much.

1067
00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:56,520
Right on cool. Well, you're a victim of it too.

1068
00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:58,520
You grew up in Belton, that's the sticks basically too.

1069
00:40:58,520 --> 00:41:00,520
No, no, we had

1070
00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:02,520
Rizgabar. I mean, we had

1071
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:04,520
culture.

1072
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,520
Oh, Cimarron Trails, yeah

1073
00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:08,520
that's right. Yeah.

1074
00:41:08,520 --> 00:41:10,520
Yep.

1075
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,520
Alright, next on the list is Copper...

1076
00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:14,520
Now one of my exes lives in

1077
00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:16,520
Oh, okay.

1078
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:18,520
Yeah, it used to be...

1079
00:41:18,520 --> 00:41:20,520
Anyway, let's move on.

1080
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:22,520
Let's move on.

1081
00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:24,520
Okay, okay, you're right.

1082
00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:26,520
Copperhead snakes get an ass paddling.

1083
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:30,520
Agreed? Since they eat

1084
00:41:30,520 --> 00:41:32,520
cicadas and they're all over the place now,

1085
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:34,520
they get an ass paddling.

1086
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:36,520
So,

1087
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:38,520
I mean, who's going to grab them and who's going to ass paddle them?

1088
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:40,520
Do we got that figured out?

1089
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:42,520
I mean, we are invisible.

1090
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:44,520
I ain't grabbing them.

1091
00:41:44,520 --> 00:41:46,520
I wonder if they can... I think they can feel

1092
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:48,520
heat. I don't know if being invisible is going to help us

1093
00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:50,520
on that one.

1094
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:52,520
I ain't grabbing them.

1095
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:54,520
I'm doing the paddling. I ain't grabbing them.

1096
00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:56,520
Okay, you know what?

1097
00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,520
Maybe we'll just go ahead... let's just go ahead and leave

1098
00:41:58,520 --> 00:42:00,520
Copperhead snakes alone for now, okay?

1099
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:02,520
Seriously, I don't like

1100
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,520
snakes. Okay.

1101
00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:06,520
Go ahead and leave Copperhead snakes alone

1102
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:08,520
on the count that nobody wants to grab them

1103
00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:10,520
and no one wants to get close to

1104
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:12,520
enough to ass paddle them. So,

1105
00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:14,520
Copperhead snakes, you're fine.

1106
00:42:14,520 --> 00:42:16,520
Just stay out of my fucking yard.

1107
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:18,520
Yeah, just stay away from us.

1108
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:20,520
Next,

1109
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:22,520
next, that gets an ass paddling.

1110
00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:24,520
Any halfway house that takes

1111
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,520
in that sick fuck Robert Courtney,

1112
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,520
the guy that diluted the cancer drugs,

1113
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:30,520
if a

1114
00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:32,520
halfway house accepts

1115
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:34,520
in,

1116
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:36,520
they get a forever ass paddling

1117
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:38,520
that never stops.

1118
00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:40,520
And Robert Courtney,

1119
00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:42,520
that piece of shit...

1120
00:42:42,520 --> 00:42:44,520
Yeah, I know what you're talking about.

1121
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:46,520
You know what? I'm just going to reserve

1122
00:42:46,520 --> 00:42:48,520
what I'd like done to him

1123
00:42:48,520 --> 00:42:50,520
to myself.

1124
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:52,520
But I know what I would like seen done

1125
00:42:52,520 --> 00:42:54,520
to him.

1126
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:56,520
Yeah, piece of crap.

1127
00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:58,520
Alright.

1128
00:42:58,520 --> 00:43:00,520
He's being freed.

1129
00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:02,520
Right now they haven't found a halfway house

1130
00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,520
that wants him because

1131
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:06,520
there's a lot of people that had a loved one die.

1132
00:43:06,520 --> 00:43:08,520
This sick fuck

1133
00:43:08,520 --> 00:43:10,520
was diluting cancer

1134
00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:12,520
drugs and people heard about that

1135
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:14,520
and they were raising hell.

1136
00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:16,520
I don't know how he did not escape

1137
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:18,520
the death penalty himself.

1138
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:20,520
I would have been all for it.

1139
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:22,520
Had to do this whole system?

1140
00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:24,520
Yeah, well,

1141
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,520
you know what? Right now,

1142
00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:28,520
right now that bag of crap

1143
00:43:28,520 --> 00:43:30,520
cannot get in a halfway house

1144
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,520
because these halfway houses, my understanding is

1145
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:34,520
they're afraid to take him in because people

1146
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,520
are going to be out there practically rioting.

1147
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,520
So, in their loved one's

1148
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:40,520
name that passed away because they

1149
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,520
weren't getting the right cancer drugs.

1150
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:44,520
That motherfucker.

1151
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:46,520
Alright, next. NFL for completely

1152
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:48,520
screwing the Chief's schedule up.

1153
00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:50,520
Can we agree with that even though they're in the Hall of Fame?

1154
00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:52,520
The NFL is

1155
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:54,520
already in the Hall of Fame of ass paddling.

1156
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:56,520
We have to pull them out and give them an ass

1157
00:43:56,520 --> 00:43:58,520
paddling because they earned another one.

1158
00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:00,520
Agreed?

1159
00:44:00,520 --> 00:44:02,520
I'm hearing trumpets.

1160
00:44:02,520 --> 00:44:04,520
I'm hearing hands.

1161
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:06,520
Alright, what do you think?

1162
00:44:06,520 --> 00:44:08,520
Bare-assed?

1163
00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:10,520
Oh, yeah.

1164
00:44:10,520 --> 00:44:12,520
Okay, bare-assed paddling. There you go, NFL.

1165
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:14,520
I don't know. I don't know.

1166
00:44:14,520 --> 00:44:16,520
I...

1167
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:18,520
Well, no. Actually,

1168
00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:20,520
I think I may have to

1169
00:44:20,520 --> 00:44:22,520
withdraw that.

1170
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:26,520
Okay.

1171
00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:28,520
Can't see, Chiefs.

1172
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:30,520
Want to go for a

1173
00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:32,520
three-peat? Yes.

1174
00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:34,520
If you want the

1175
00:44:34,520 --> 00:44:36,520
three-peat, you gotta earn it.

1176
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:38,520
Mm-hmm. Okay.

1177
00:44:38,520 --> 00:44:40,520
Alright, I withdraw this.

1178
00:44:40,520 --> 00:44:42,520
Them and the Copperhead Snakes are...

1179
00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:44,520
Okay, the NFL and the Copperhead Snakes

1180
00:44:44,520 --> 00:44:46,520
are exempt in this one. Okay.

1181
00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:48,520
Alrighty.

1182
00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:50,520
Next one.

1183
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,520
That's it.

1184
00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:54,520
Right there.

1185
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:56,520
Pepsi for coming out with Pepsi Blue to

1186
00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:58,520
salute the Star Wars saga.

1187
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:00,520
That's bare-assed right there.

1188
00:45:00,520 --> 00:45:02,520
Bare-assed paddle right there.

1189
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:04,520
Agreed?

1190
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:06,520
I thought they were on the

1191
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:08,520
last one, too.

1192
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:10,520
I don't think so.

1193
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:12,520
No, that was the milk.

1194
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:14,520
Oh, yeah, that was the milk.

1195
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:16,520
Yeah, that was the blue milk.

1196
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:18,520
Yep. And then, anyone

1197
00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:20,520
who purchased Pepsi Blue?

1198
00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:22,520
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1199
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,520
Yeah. We can't let you guys

1200
00:45:24,520 --> 00:45:26,520
get away. I don't drink

1201
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,520
anything blue.

1202
00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:30,520
No, no, it's not right. Anything blue

1203
00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:32,520
will make you sick pretty much, right?

1204
00:45:32,520 --> 00:45:34,520
Yep. Yep. Yep. Alright.

1205
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:36,520
Producer Bob Rock

1206
00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:38,520
for co-signing with Motley Crue and making

1207
00:45:38,520 --> 00:45:40,520
an AI-generated embarrassment.

1208
00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:42,520
And, of course, Motley Crue is

1209
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:44,520
already in the Ask Paddlin' Hall of Fame.

1210
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:46,520
They get pulled out for another round

1211
00:45:46,520 --> 00:45:48,520
with old Sparky. And this is because

1212
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:50,520
they're treatment of McMars.

1213
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:52,520
And we don't like it.

1214
00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:54,520
So. Amen. Yep.

1215
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:56,520
So Bob Rock and

1216
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:58,520
Motley getting ass-paddling.

1217
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:00,520
Next up,

1218
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:02,520
City of Kansas City for allowing internet

1219
00:46:02,520 --> 00:46:04,520
pirates to seize the whole system.

1220
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:08,520
Yes.

1221
00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:10,520
You mission that me off

1222
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:12,520
the air? Yep. Yep.

1223
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:14,520
Yep. They get it.

1224
00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:16,520
And then, finally,

1225
00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:18,520
the internet pirates that are

1226
00:46:18,520 --> 00:46:20,520
that have done this

1227
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:22,520
horrible deed,

1228
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:24,520
they get an ass-paddling and bear-ass

1229
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:26,520
as well. I hope they washed up.

1230
00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:30,520
So, that is

1231
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:32,520
the end of ass-paddling for this

1232
00:46:32,520 --> 00:46:34,520
show. Let's go ahead

1233
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:36,520
and take our second break and we're going to come

1234
00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:38,520
right back.

1235
00:46:38,520 --> 00:46:40,520
Unless the power goes out or something

1236
00:46:40,520 --> 00:46:42,520
or one of us strokes out or something.

1237
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:44,520
Other than that, we'll be back.

1238
00:46:44,520 --> 00:46:46,520
I don't plan on it.

1239
00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:48,520
I don't either, but

1240
00:46:48,520 --> 00:46:50,520
you know what?

1241
00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:52,520
I just had to...

1242
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:54,520
Yes.

1243
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:02,520
Our constant pursuit

1244
00:47:02,520 --> 00:47:04,520
for a real knee-slapper.

1245
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:06,520
It's strange insults from an alien.

1246
00:47:06,520 --> 00:47:08,520
Real hilarity.

1247
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:10,520
Hey, you're sure? Are you

1248
00:47:10,520 --> 00:47:12,520
aware of the Amber Alert, right?

1249
00:47:12,520 --> 00:47:14,520
Well, get rid of your disinfectants

1250
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:16,520
and rubber bedspreads, kids.

1251
00:47:16,520 --> 00:47:18,520
It's the all-new Amber Heard Alert

1252
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:20,520
system. This fantastic

1253
00:47:20,520 --> 00:47:22,520
early warning device helps one stay

1254
00:47:22,520 --> 00:47:24,520
dry and rid of all those annoying

1255
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:26,520
mattress invoices.

1256
00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:28,520
Simply hook up to child under six

1257
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,520
or psychopath and wait for the running

1258
00:47:30,520 --> 00:47:32,520
water sound.

1259
00:47:32,520 --> 00:47:34,520
This clever machine has three distinct settings.

1260
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,520
Bablin Brook, Ocean Way,

1261
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:37,960
and the

1262
00:47:37,960 --> 00:47:40,520
Roring River for those close calls.

1263
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:44,520
Order today and get a free Cinnabon Renuze It Cartridge.

1264
00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:50,520
If a 10-pound bag of shit

1265
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:52,520
could talk, this is what it would sound like.

1266
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:54,520
Now it's time for

1267
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:56,520
pick-up lines from a loser.

1268
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:58,520
Are you a parking ticket?

1269
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:00,520
You got five written all over you.

1270
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:02,520
Now, from this underground

1271
00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:04,520
bunker,

1272
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:06,520
you can get a free

1273
00:48:06,520 --> 00:48:08,520
Cinnabon Renuze It Cartridge.

1274
00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:10,520
From this underground bunker,

1275
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:12,520
camped in Missouri, stocked

1276
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:14,520
full of dried guts, canned food,

1277
00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:16,520
and a couple of vibrating toys

1278
00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:18,520
and some ramblings of a madman

1279
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:20,520
featuring Rob Rad.

1280
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:22,520
My mechanic told me

1281
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:24,520
I could repair your brakes.

1282
00:48:24,520 --> 00:48:26,520
So I made you one ladder.

1283
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:28,520
Good job.

1284
00:48:28,520 --> 00:48:30,520
And now,

1285
00:48:30,520 --> 00:48:32,520
Deep Thoughts with Mark.

1286
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:38,520
Whenever I mow my lawn,

1287
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:40,520
then I look back at the front yard

1288
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:42,520
and there's always a couple of blades sticking up.

1289
00:48:42,520 --> 00:48:44,520
Are those the blades of grass

1290
00:48:44,520 --> 00:48:46,520
that were smart enough to duck?

1291
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:48,520
Hmph.

1292
00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,520
I may never know.

1293
00:48:58,520 --> 00:49:00,520
Hey, look! I think we found land!

1294
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:02,520
Oh my god, I think we're safe!

1295
00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:04,520
Oh no!

1296
00:49:04,520 --> 00:49:06,520
It's the island of horrible jokes!

1297
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:08,520
Oh my god!

1298
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:10,520
Oh my god!

1299
00:49:10,520 --> 00:49:12,520
I dreamt I was a muffler.

1300
00:49:12,520 --> 00:49:14,520
I woke up

1301
00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:16,520
exhausted.

1302
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:18,520
Hehehehehehehehe

1303
00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:20,520
The apocalypse

1304
00:49:20,520 --> 00:49:22,520
just happened.

1305
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:24,520
You don't know what to do.

1306
00:49:24,520 --> 00:49:26,520
You don't know where to go.

1307
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:28,520
But we can tell you what you can eat.

1308
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:30,520
Hi all, this is Mark here.

1309
00:49:30,520 --> 00:49:32,520
I'm usually the one telling you

1310
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:34,520
what to eat during an apocalypse.

1311
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:36,520
Well, this time I decided

1312
00:49:36,520 --> 00:49:38,520
to go the other way.

1313
00:49:38,520 --> 00:49:40,520
You ever consider just going to

1314
00:49:40,520 --> 00:49:42,520
Ground Zero and saying fuck it?

1315
00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:44,520
Do you really want to be the guy

1316
00:49:44,520 --> 00:49:46,520
running around looking for radioactive deer

1317
00:49:46,520 --> 00:49:48,520
guessing whether water is not

1318
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,520
contaminated or not? No food, no shelter,

1319
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:52,520
no nothing.

1320
00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:54,520
Oh no, there's a strong argument that says, you know what?

1321
00:49:54,520 --> 00:49:56,520
Let's just go to Ground Zero

1322
00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:58,520
and see what's for us after.

1323
00:49:58,520 --> 00:50:00,520
Just a thought.

1324
00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:06,520
Hello, this is Satan.

1325
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:10,520
You might know me from my pet name, Inflation.

1326
00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:15,520
I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than

1327
00:50:15,520 --> 00:50:18,520
listening to two douchebags in microphone

1328
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:21,520
by a nice warm fire at night.

1329
00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:25,520
I sit there and I reflect on all the cells I burned that day.

1330
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:27,520
Enjoy.

1331
00:50:38,520 --> 00:50:40,520
Two douchebags in microphone, I'm Mark.

1332
00:50:40,520 --> 00:50:42,520
And I'm Rob.

1333
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:45,520
Oh, I've got some great news, Rob.

1334
00:50:45,520 --> 00:50:47,520
You want to hear it?

1335
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:49,520
Yes, I do.

1336
00:50:49,520 --> 00:50:55,520
Pizza Hut is coming out with a cheeseburger.

1337
00:50:55,520 --> 00:50:56,520
What?

1338
00:50:56,520 --> 00:51:01,520
Pizza Hut is coming out with a cheeseburger.

1339
00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:05,520
Actual almond bun cheeseburger, not cheeseburger pizza.

1340
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:06,520
Well, just hang tight.

1341
00:51:06,520 --> 00:51:08,520
Well, they already have a cheeseburger pizza.

1342
00:51:08,520 --> 00:51:11,520
Yeah, they do and it's good. I like it.

1343
00:51:11,520 --> 00:51:15,520
Our next Pizza Hut meal is about to get even more portable

1344
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:18,520
in a crossover. Hang on.

1345
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:22,520
I need my eyeballs. Thank you for making me go get them today.

1346
00:51:22,520 --> 00:51:24,520
You're welcome. Yes, everybody.

1347
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:28,520
Just so you know, before we come on here, I made him go get his eyeballs.

1348
00:51:28,520 --> 00:51:32,520
He demanded I go get my glasses and he was right.

1349
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:35,520
So now I can read this because of that.

1350
00:51:35,520 --> 00:51:37,520
I love you, Mark.

1351
00:51:37,520 --> 00:51:39,520
I love you too, buddy.

1352
00:51:39,520 --> 00:51:40,520
Okay, so I'm going to start over.

1353
00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:43,520
Our next Pizza Hut meal is about to get even more portable.

1354
00:51:43,520 --> 00:51:46,520
In a crossover that you probably didn't see coming,

1355
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:50,520
Pizza Hut is launching a burger called the Cheeseburger Melt.

1356
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:53,520
According to the chain's official announcement,

1357
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:58,520
this pizza inspired sandwich starts with a Parmesan crusted thin crust bread

1358
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:05,520
that's folded to encase beef, bacon, onions, mozzarella and cheddar.

1359
00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:11,520
A dipper of the chain's own special burger sauce is served on the side.

1360
00:52:11,520 --> 00:52:15,520
The new dish is a little bit pizza, a little bit cheeseburger

1361
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:18,520
and a new entry point for the pizza chain.

1362
00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:22,520
Of course, no cheeseburger dish would be complete without French fries and a drink.

1363
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:23,520
So how about that, Rob?

1364
00:52:23,520 --> 00:52:26,520
Not only do you get this cheeseburger concoction,

1365
00:52:26,520 --> 00:52:31,520
but you can also get fries at Pizza Hut. Isn't that good?

1366
00:52:31,520 --> 00:52:32,520
That's awesome.

1367
00:52:32,520 --> 00:52:41,520
We have a Pizza Hut in Campton, but they don't have near the menu.

1368
00:52:41,520 --> 00:52:44,520
Then they probably won't get it. That sucks.

1369
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:48,520
The new burger is available as part of the My Hut...

1370
00:52:48,520 --> 00:52:51,520
That's alright. Jim City is an hour away. I'll run up there.

1371
00:52:51,520 --> 00:52:52,520
There you go.

1372
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:53,520
It would be worth it.

1373
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:54,520
Yeah, it would.

1374
00:52:54,520 --> 00:52:55,520
I want to try one.

1375
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:56,520
I do too.

1376
00:52:56,520 --> 00:53:00,520
Hey, let's both give a review when we try one, okay?

1377
00:53:00,520 --> 00:53:01,520
Yeah.

1378
00:53:01,520 --> 00:53:02,520
Okay.

1379
00:53:02,520 --> 00:53:05,520
The new burger is available as part of the My Hut box package still,

1380
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:09,520
which can include fries if you so choose or wings.

1381
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:13,520
Ooh. So if you don't want fries and get wings, huh.

1382
00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,520
I'm going to cry, Rob. I'm getting weepy.

1383
00:53:16,520 --> 00:53:17,520
Oh, yeah. Here we go.

1384
00:53:17,520 --> 00:53:21,520
Oh, man. I hear angels singing. I hear trumpets.

1385
00:53:21,520 --> 00:53:24,520
Yeah. There's twice this show.

1386
00:53:24,520 --> 00:53:28,520
Two trumpet sections. We're on it tonight.

1387
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:34,520
Yeah. This is awesome here.

1388
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:38,520
The cheeseburger melt itself starts at $6.99,

1389
00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:41,520
while the My Hut box package starts at $8.49.

1390
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:43,520
That's pretty cheap.

1391
00:53:43,520 --> 00:53:44,520
That's cheap.

1392
00:53:44,520 --> 00:53:46,520
Yeah, that's $8.49.

1393
00:53:46,520 --> 00:53:51,520
Not nearly as expensive a McDonald's, is it? $8.49.

1394
00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:53,520
There's your Happy Meal.

1395
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:55,520
There's your fucking Happy Meal sucking McDonald's.

1396
00:53:55,520 --> 00:53:57,520
I got your Happy Meal right here.

1397
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:01,520
Take a bite out of it.

1398
00:54:01,520 --> 00:54:04,520
All right, Rob, we turn to you to class this place up a little bit.

1399
00:54:04,520 --> 00:54:09,520
Let me spray some Lysol in my department here. Go ahead.

1400
00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:13,520
The hell with it. I'm going to Egypt.

1401
00:54:13,520 --> 00:54:20,520
I'm just spraying Lysol. Never mind me.

1402
00:54:20,520 --> 00:54:23,520
Just so you know, I found this on the Independent.

1403
00:54:23,520 --> 00:54:26,520
Okay.

1404
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:28,520
Archeology.

1405
00:54:28,520 --> 00:54:29,520
Sorry.

1406
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:30,520
Was that a goat?

1407
00:54:30,520 --> 00:54:35,520
Yes, it was. Every program needs a goat sound. So there you go.

1408
00:54:35,520 --> 00:54:40,520
Hi, Opo. Hi, Jamie. Hi, Ricky. Dodge City, Kansas. Ra, ra, ra. Love you guys.

1409
00:54:40,520 --> 00:54:43,520
Hi, Grandma. Hi, Jamie. Hi, Ricky.

1410
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:48,520
You guys are awesome. All right, go ahead, Rob. Sorry.

1411
00:54:48,520 --> 00:54:59,520
Archeologists believe they may have discovered the secret behind one of the wonders of the world.

1412
00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:13,520
Some 4,700 years after the construction of the Egypt's Pyramid began, including the Great Pyramid of Giza.

1413
00:55:13,520 --> 00:55:16,520
Okay.

1414
00:55:16,520 --> 00:55:26,520
Researchers have found they may have been built along an abandoned branch of the River Nile.

1415
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:36,520
Uh-huh.

1416
00:55:36,520 --> 00:55:51,520
New evidence suggests the lost 40-mile branch of the Nile was used for transporting construction material to the pyramids, which were built over a thousand-year period.

1417
00:55:51,520 --> 00:56:06,520
This could explain why the pyramids were concentrated in what is now a narrow, inhospitable strip of the Saharan Desert.

1418
00:56:06,520 --> 00:56:23,520
Many of us who are interested in ancient Egypt are aware that the Egyptians must have used a waterway to build their enormous monuments, like the pyramids and valley temples.

1419
00:56:23,520 --> 00:56:42,520
Nobody was certain of the location, the shape, the size, or proximity of this mega-waterway to the actual pyramid site.

1420
00:56:42,520 --> 00:57:04,520
Okay. Well, they then used eophysical surveys and sediment cores to confirm the presence of river sediments to form channels beneath the modern land surface.

1421
00:57:04,520 --> 00:57:06,520
Oh, wow.

1422
00:57:06,520 --> 00:57:17,520
You know what they're saying? Everybody is thought that people dug all these stones and built these pyramids.

1423
00:57:17,520 --> 00:57:19,520
Uh-huh.

1424
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:30,520
And everybody said it's impossible, and there's been many myths. Well, water would be one way.

1425
00:57:30,520 --> 00:57:35,520
Yes. Yep. Yeah. And that's where the Nile was in a different location.

1426
00:57:35,520 --> 00:57:49,520
Yeah, and this, yeah, and this, and supposedly there was a waterway running right by there, and it was a tributary of the Nile.

1427
00:57:49,520 --> 00:57:50,520
Yeah, yeah.

1428
00:57:50,520 --> 00:57:52,520
That's been dried up.

1429
00:57:52,520 --> 00:58:10,520
Well, to give it a reference for people over here in North America or in the Middle West, okay, the Mississippi River used to be to the east of where it's at now by, I don't know, maybe half a mile or something.

1430
00:58:10,520 --> 00:58:16,520
They have found ships in the earth that used to go down the Mississippi.

1431
00:58:16,520 --> 00:58:25,520
Now the Mississippi wasn't that much larger than what it was, was it had a different path. So what they're talking about this here is they're talking about the same thing.

1432
00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:37,520
Over years, this is what happens, you know, they change course, rivers change course for different reasons, you know, they build up sediment and they have to go another way and all that.

1433
00:58:37,520 --> 00:58:49,520
So that was pretty interesting because I'm familiar what you're saying is, and they're saying what people thought they'd done, you know, grabbing all these huge blocks and all that actually really didn't happen.

1434
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:53,520
They thought they drug them through the desert. No, they didn't.

1435
00:58:53,520 --> 00:58:54,520
No, they had waterway right there.

1436
00:58:54,520 --> 00:58:55,520
They had some waterway.

1437
00:58:55,520 --> 00:58:58,520
Yeah. So that was pretty interesting.

1438
00:58:58,520 --> 00:59:02,520
What was that or ET had something to do with it? Let me see.

1439
00:59:02,520 --> 00:59:07,520
I don't know. The landing strips. You think about it. However you think about it.

1440
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:12,520
Well, I have a question for you personally. What do you think about the landing strips they have there?

1441
00:59:12,520 --> 00:59:20,520
They're obviously landing strips from the air. So why would there be landing strips if there wasn't something coming down from the sky?

1442
00:59:20,520 --> 00:59:23,520
How would they even think about that?

1443
00:59:23,520 --> 00:59:29,520
I'll tell you what I did in the extra. I do too. So who knows what happened.

1444
00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:33,520
Maybe I might start bringing more stories.

1445
00:59:33,520 --> 00:59:40,520
Yeah, why not? I think our audience would really like that. You know what? Email us. Let us know.

1446
00:59:40,520 --> 00:59:42,520
Before I go.

1447
00:59:42,520 --> 00:59:45,520
They want off the wall stuff from us.

1448
00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:56,520
Yeah, obviously they do. Obviously. Okay. We have a new number one, Rob. And then I'll go into the story that I want. Okay. You know who our new number one is?

1449
00:59:56,520 --> 00:59:58,520
Who?

1450
00:59:58,520 --> 01:00:02,520
Boardman Oregon.

1451
01:00:02,520 --> 01:00:04,520
It took over NA.

1452
01:00:04,520 --> 01:00:11,520
It took over. Oh no, it did not take over NA. NA, we don't know what it is. So we, you know, it's undisclosed locations.

1453
01:00:11,520 --> 01:00:13,520
Okay. All right. All right.

1454
01:00:13,520 --> 01:00:17,520
Boardman Oregon is number one. Pretty solid.

1455
01:00:17,520 --> 01:00:19,520
Purdue Canada is now number...

1456
01:00:19,520 --> 01:00:23,520
I don't know anybody in Boardman, but I love y'all.

1457
01:00:23,520 --> 01:00:27,520
You guys are awesome. How much you've been picking up our program up there. Thank you so much.

1458
01:00:27,520 --> 01:00:30,520
The second is Purdue Canada now.

1459
01:00:30,520 --> 01:00:32,520
The third is Des Moines, Iowa.

1460
01:00:32,520 --> 01:00:33,520
I love all of you.

1461
01:00:33,520 --> 01:00:35,520
You guys are awesome.

1462
01:00:35,520 --> 01:00:38,520
Des Moines, Iowa is the third one.

1463
01:00:38,520 --> 01:00:44,520
I mean, besides NA, NA is actually the first. So it'd be technically it would be the fourth one.

1464
01:00:44,520 --> 01:00:45,520
The fifth one is...

1465
01:00:45,520 --> 01:00:48,520
There's our boys, Des Moines.

1466
01:00:48,520 --> 01:00:51,520
Our hometown, Kansas City is our fourth one.

1467
01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:55,520
Ashburn, I believe North Carolina is number five.

1468
01:00:55,520 --> 01:00:57,520
And Harrisonville, Missouri is number six.

1469
01:00:57,520 --> 01:00:59,520
And Brussels, Belgium is right after that.

1470
01:00:59,520 --> 01:01:11,520
So anyhow, some markets that have really, really picked up is St. Louis, Denver, San Jose, California.

1471
01:01:11,520 --> 01:01:14,520
And let's see.

1472
01:01:14,520 --> 01:01:19,520
You know, the rest are pretty much going how they always have.

1473
01:01:19,520 --> 01:01:23,520
No really big increases. So they're still steady, the other ones.

1474
01:01:23,520 --> 01:01:29,520
So anyhow, I just wanted to say thank you to Boardman and everybody else.

1475
01:01:29,520 --> 01:01:31,520
Yeah.

1476
01:01:31,520 --> 01:01:32,520
Can I add something here?

1477
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:34,520
Absolutely.

1478
01:01:34,520 --> 01:01:38,520
I noticed Camdenton hit the list too.

1479
01:01:38,520 --> 01:01:43,520
Yes. Okay, you are getting it. Okay. Yes.

1480
01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:49,520
Camdenton has done really good and we know why.

1481
01:01:49,520 --> 01:01:54,520
But it's not just you and Camdenton, it's other people. So thank you Camdenton.

1482
01:01:54,520 --> 01:01:58,520
Osage Beats too is showing up.

1483
01:01:58,520 --> 01:02:04,520
Oh yeah. Osage has been there. Camdenton just showed up on the list.

1484
01:02:04,520 --> 01:02:06,520
Yeah. And that was pretty cool.

1485
01:02:06,520 --> 01:02:07,520
There we are.

1486
01:02:07,520 --> 01:02:11,520
Yep. So thank you Camdenton. That would be Rob's hometown.

1487
01:02:11,520 --> 01:02:14,520
And thank you Kansas City. That would be where I am at.

1488
01:02:14,520 --> 01:02:17,520
So anyhow, let's see.

1489
01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:19,520
Yeah, we love everybody.

1490
01:02:19,520 --> 01:02:26,520
Yep. Kind of disappointing. Chicago died down considerably when they were really a hot market for a while.

1491
01:02:26,520 --> 01:02:31,520
So anyhow, Chicago, we still love you even though you don't like us.

1492
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:34,520
So, alright.

1493
01:02:34,520 --> 01:02:35,520
AI.

1494
01:02:35,520 --> 01:02:41,520
You even put up for him in that promo.

1495
01:02:41,520 --> 01:02:49,520
Yeah, I know. I put it on about every episode. And I just don't know. You know, Chicago is just pretty much, they are audio.

1496
01:02:49,520 --> 01:02:51,520
They are not that bad. They are not that bad.

1497
01:02:51,520 --> 01:02:55,520
Yeah, they are audio flipping us off is what is going on.

1498
01:02:55,520 --> 01:02:59,520
So, alrighty.

1499
01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:05,520
AI was used to make a person's boss look racist.

1500
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:12,520
Now we have been talking about AI for quite a while, right? And we have been talking about the slippery slope that has been going on with AI.

1501
01:03:12,520 --> 01:03:14,520
Well this here, this...

1502
01:03:14,520 --> 01:03:15,520
Come on, John Connor.

1503
01:03:15,520 --> 01:03:17,520
We can't have you quick enough.

1504
01:03:17,520 --> 01:03:23,520
This right here, what I am getting ready to read to you, is exactly what Rob and I have been talking about.

1505
01:03:23,520 --> 01:03:32,520
So, a Merlin High School athletic director is facing criminal charges after police say he used artificial intelligence

1506
01:03:32,520 --> 01:03:37,520
to duplicate the voice of Pikesville High School principal Eric Ezwert.

1507
01:03:37,520 --> 01:03:43,520
Leading the community to believe Ezwert said racist and anti-Semitic things about teachers and students.

1508
01:03:43,520 --> 01:03:54,520
We now have conclusive evidence that the recording was not authentic, Baltimore County Police Chief Robert McCullin told reporters during the news conference Thursday.

1509
01:03:54,520 --> 01:04:00,520
It has been determined the recording was generated through the use of artificial intelligence technology.

1510
01:04:00,520 --> 01:04:15,520
Dozan Durean, 31, was arrested Thursday on charges of stalking, theft, disruption of school operations, and retaliation against a witness after a month-long investigation from the Baltimore County Police Department.

1511
01:04:15,520 --> 01:04:20,520
Attempts to contact Durean or Ezwert for comment were not successful.

1512
01:04:20,520 --> 01:04:30,520
The wild headline making details of this case aside, it emphasizes the serious potential for criminal mischief of artificial intelligence, which we have been saying all along.

1513
01:04:30,520 --> 01:04:35,520
The experts have been warning about sometimes, so I guess we are experts, Rob.

1514
01:04:35,520 --> 01:04:40,520
So, anyhow, this is exactly what we are talking about.

1515
01:04:40,520 --> 01:04:44,520
So, in case anyone didn't quite catch it, I think you probably did. You are all intelligent.

1516
01:04:44,520 --> 01:04:51,520
So, okay, so it sounds like this guy did something wrong maybe in school.

1517
01:04:51,520 --> 01:05:00,520
So, the principal had to go against him, had to report him and administer, probably administer punishment right.

1518
01:05:00,520 --> 01:05:12,520
So, this guy that did whatever wrong before to get this principal on his list retaliated by using AI to make him look racist and anti-Semitic.

1519
01:05:12,520 --> 01:05:16,520
So, a Semetic, not Semic, anti-Semitic.

1520
01:05:16,520 --> 01:05:20,520
So, this is what Rob and I are talking about right here.

1521
01:05:20,520 --> 01:05:26,520
And as AI gets better, the harder it's going to be for anyone to realize what's fake and what's real.

1522
01:05:26,520 --> 01:05:28,520
And that's going to be a damn shame.

1523
01:05:28,520 --> 01:05:32,520
In other words, us, Tom and folk, are fucked.

1524
01:05:32,520 --> 01:05:33,520
Yes.

1525
01:05:33,520 --> 01:05:35,520
Just so.

1526
01:05:35,520 --> 01:05:40,520
Because someone did that to us, we don't have enough money to like take it to court.

1527
01:05:40,520 --> 01:05:42,520
People are just going to think we did that.

1528
01:05:42,520 --> 01:05:44,520
So, yeah.

1529
01:05:44,520 --> 01:05:45,520
I worked to pay my bills.

1530
01:05:45,520 --> 01:05:46,520
Yep.

1531
01:05:46,520 --> 01:05:47,520
Yeah.

1532
01:05:47,520 --> 01:05:49,520
Yeah, so I mean it is really.

1533
01:05:49,520 --> 01:05:52,520
I'll go to prison for something I didn't do.

1534
01:05:52,520 --> 01:05:53,520
That's right.

1535
01:05:53,520 --> 01:06:00,520
So, anyhow, this is exactly what we're talking about and I really don't know where else to take it.

1536
01:06:00,520 --> 01:06:05,520
So, Rob, go ahead.

1537
01:06:05,520 --> 01:06:08,520
Okay, I'm going to, yeah, well I'm going to lighten the mood.

1538
01:06:08,520 --> 01:06:09,520
How's that?

1539
01:06:09,520 --> 01:06:12,520
That sounds good.

1540
01:06:12,520 --> 01:06:15,520
Are you a Reba McIntyre fan?

1541
01:06:15,520 --> 01:06:19,520
Who isn't?

1542
01:06:19,520 --> 01:06:22,520
Even Satan is a Reba McIntyre fan.

1543
01:06:22,520 --> 01:06:23,520
Yeah.

1544
01:06:23,520 --> 01:06:26,520
I'm talking about her TV show.

1545
01:06:26,520 --> 01:06:30,520
Yeah, her TV show I could do without.

1546
01:06:30,520 --> 01:06:33,520
Okay, well, I was a fan.

1547
01:06:33,520 --> 01:06:34,520
Okay.

1548
01:06:34,520 --> 01:06:35,520
I know.

1549
01:06:35,520 --> 01:06:36,520
Okay.

1550
01:06:36,520 --> 01:06:38,520
I'm pretty sure some of our listeners are fans.

1551
01:06:38,520 --> 01:06:40,520
Okay, here's the deal, Rob.

1552
01:06:40,520 --> 01:06:44,520
I'm sure the show's good, but I generally don't watch network TV.

1553
01:06:44,520 --> 01:06:46,520
I told you about The Good Doctor.

1554
01:06:46,520 --> 01:06:51,520
That is one rare show that I watch on network TV and then some game shows.

1555
01:06:51,520 --> 01:06:54,520
So, I mean, it's probably a fine show.

1556
01:06:54,520 --> 01:06:57,520
Yeah, you never really have been a TV watcher.

1557
01:06:57,520 --> 01:07:00,520
No, I've never really cared for it that much.

1558
01:07:00,520 --> 01:07:04,520
I just thought it was a waste of time and I'd rather read a book anytime.

1559
01:07:04,520 --> 01:07:09,520
So anyhow, even though I'm a very slow reader, I don't care.

1560
01:07:09,520 --> 01:07:10,520
I love it.

1561
01:07:10,520 --> 01:07:11,520
I savor it.

1562
01:07:11,520 --> 01:07:14,520
So anyhow, go ahead.

1563
01:07:14,520 --> 01:07:15,520
All right.

1564
01:07:15,520 --> 01:07:26,520
Well, Reba McIntyre is set to return to comedy TV as her new sitcom, Happy's Place,

1565
01:07:26,520 --> 01:07:32,520
got the green light and dropped its first trailer on Wednesday.

1566
01:07:32,520 --> 01:07:41,520
The actress, 69, who recently revealed she was not initially attracted to her boyfriend,

1567
01:07:41,520 --> 01:07:53,520
I don't know where the hell that came from, got her latest series ordered by NBC on May 7.

1568
01:07:53,520 --> 01:07:55,520
Okay.

1569
01:07:55,520 --> 01:08:08,520
Her original sitcom, Reba, went by the name Reba Hart, but now she's playing a character called Bobby.

1570
01:08:08,520 --> 01:08:16,520
In the show's official description, Bobby inherits her father's restaurant

1571
01:08:16,520 --> 01:08:29,520
and is left to discover that she has a new business partner and a half-sister she never knew she had.

1572
01:08:29,520 --> 01:08:30,520
Okay.

1573
01:08:30,520 --> 01:08:43,520
Her multi-camera show will be executive produced by the multi-hyphenate alongside her old Reba crew.

1574
01:08:43,520 --> 01:08:45,520
Uh-huh.

1575
01:08:45,520 --> 01:08:49,520
So, okay, here's what it boils down to.

1576
01:08:49,520 --> 01:08:51,520
Okay.

1577
01:08:51,520 --> 01:08:55,520
I'm going to break this down as a lot of reading.

1578
01:08:55,520 --> 01:08:56,520
Okay.

1579
01:08:56,520 --> 01:09:07,520
Everybody that was part of the Reba show is now part of Happy's Place.

1580
01:09:07,520 --> 01:09:08,520
Okay.

1581
01:09:08,520 --> 01:09:11,520
They're playing different parts.

1582
01:09:11,520 --> 01:09:13,520
Okay.

1583
01:09:13,520 --> 01:09:14,520
Yeah.

1584
01:09:14,520 --> 01:09:15,520
That's cool.

1585
01:09:15,520 --> 01:09:19,520
Kind of like Newhart.

1586
01:09:19,520 --> 01:09:20,520
Uh-huh.

1587
01:09:20,520 --> 01:09:23,520
Kind of like Newhart in Bob Newhart's show.

1588
01:09:23,520 --> 01:09:25,520
Yeah, it's kind of, yeah.

1589
01:09:25,520 --> 01:09:37,520
Happy's Place is set to premiere sometime this fall on NBC taking the Friday slot at 8, 7 Central.

1590
01:09:37,520 --> 01:09:41,520
Okay.

1591
01:09:41,520 --> 01:09:45,520
Yeah, even Mr. Peterman's going to be on there.

1592
01:09:45,520 --> 01:09:46,520
Cool.

1593
01:09:46,520 --> 01:09:48,520
They're all on there.

1594
01:09:48,520 --> 01:09:50,520
That's awesome.

1595
01:09:50,520 --> 01:09:52,520
Very cool.

1596
01:09:52,520 --> 01:09:54,520
Let's see.

1597
01:09:54,520 --> 01:09:57,520
I'm trying to think what kind of story I want to go into.

1598
01:09:57,520 --> 01:09:58,520
You did.

1599
01:09:58,520 --> 01:10:02,520
You lightened it up quite a bit and that's fine.

1600
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:03,520
I like it.

1601
01:10:03,520 --> 01:10:05,520
Let's see.

1602
01:10:05,520 --> 01:10:06,520
Okay.

1603
01:10:06,520 --> 01:10:12,520
Here's one in this pre-light, but I feel for the guy I really do.

1604
01:10:12,520 --> 01:10:13,520
Okay.

1605
01:10:13,520 --> 01:10:17,520
There's this gentleman that has an emotional support alligator.

1606
01:10:17,520 --> 01:10:20,520
I believe we talked about him before on this program, haven't we?

1607
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:21,520
Yeah, we have.

1608
01:10:21,520 --> 01:10:22,520
Okay.

1609
01:10:22,520 --> 01:10:23,520
I kind of like him.

1610
01:10:23,520 --> 01:10:26,520
Well, somebody stole his alligator.

1611
01:10:26,520 --> 01:10:28,520
Oh, what?

1612
01:10:28,520 --> 01:10:29,520
Yes.

1613
01:10:29,520 --> 01:10:30,520
Okay.

1614
01:10:30,520 --> 01:10:34,520
So he kept getting threats, evidently.

1615
01:10:34,520 --> 01:10:38,520
People thinking that it was inhumane to keep an alligator indoors.

1616
01:10:38,520 --> 01:10:39,520
Okay.

1617
01:10:39,520 --> 01:10:43,520
And all the famous pictures, I think you see them too, the guy holding the alligator, the

1618
01:10:43,520 --> 01:10:48,520
alligator's hugging him, you know, got his head right next to his and all that.

1619
01:10:48,520 --> 01:10:54,520
Well, there's people in this world that think that he was being cruel for having that alligator

1620
01:10:54,520 --> 01:10:55,520
outside of nature.

1621
01:10:55,520 --> 01:10:56,520
Okay.

1622
01:10:56,520 --> 01:11:01,520
When, I mean, to me, it looked like the alligator was doing fine.

1623
01:11:01,520 --> 01:11:05,520
I mean, he's hugging the guy instead of trying to snap his head off.

1624
01:11:05,520 --> 01:11:06,520
Okay.

1625
01:11:06,520 --> 01:11:08,520
Well, while he was gone, he went to some friend's house.

1626
01:11:08,520 --> 01:11:12,520
He came back, someone broke in his house and stole his alligator.

1627
01:11:12,520 --> 01:11:14,520
He thinks they let him off in the wild.

1628
01:11:14,520 --> 01:11:20,520
So he is like devastated that he doesn't have his, his loving pet anymore.

1629
01:11:20,520 --> 01:11:27,520
And, you know, as stupid as it sounds, as dumb as it might sound, I think that's horrible.

1630
01:11:27,520 --> 01:11:32,520
I, that poor guy is probably grieving because he really loved that animal.

1631
01:11:32,520 --> 01:11:33,520
And here's what it is.

1632
01:11:33,520 --> 01:11:39,520
No idiot should have the right to determine whether he can have that alligator or not.

1633
01:11:39,520 --> 01:11:43,520
If, if the cops don't do anything about it, if the law doesn't do anything about it, it's

1634
01:11:43,520 --> 01:11:45,520
not your fucking business.

1635
01:11:45,520 --> 01:11:48,520
So, I hope they catch him because...

1636
01:11:48,520 --> 01:11:51,520
As long as you keep it under control.

1637
01:11:51,520 --> 01:11:52,520
Yeah.

1638
01:11:52,520 --> 01:11:53,520
Well, it ain't under control.

1639
01:11:53,520 --> 01:11:55,520
This sounds to me like those do-gooders.

1640
01:11:55,520 --> 01:11:57,520
You know what I mean?

1641
01:11:57,520 --> 01:11:58,520
The do-gooders?

1642
01:11:58,520 --> 01:11:59,520
Yeah.

1643
01:11:59,520 --> 01:12:00,520
Yeah.

1644
01:12:00,520 --> 01:12:01,520
Yeah.

1645
01:12:01,520 --> 01:12:02,520
Those guys go, Oh, I'm going to help out.

1646
01:12:02,520 --> 01:12:03,520
Yeah.

1647
01:12:03,520 --> 01:12:04,520
Fuck you guys.

1648
01:12:04,520 --> 01:12:05,520
Leave us alone, man.

1649
01:12:05,520 --> 01:12:06,520
You know what?

1650
01:12:06,520 --> 01:12:07,520
Someone wants a pet alligator.

1651
01:12:07,520 --> 01:12:08,520
Let them fucking have it.

1652
01:12:08,520 --> 01:12:09,520
It's not on this...

1653
01:12:09,520 --> 01:12:12,520
You're not on this earth to try to straighten out people you deem need straightened out.

1654
01:12:12,520 --> 01:12:16,520
I, you know, if you ask me, you fucks are the ones that need straightened out.

1655
01:12:16,520 --> 01:12:20,520
So anyhow, um, but I thought that kind of sucked.

1656
01:12:20,520 --> 01:12:23,520
And I know we, we're ending this program on a sad note.

1657
01:12:23,520 --> 01:12:27,520
So you got something to bring us up?

1658
01:12:27,520 --> 01:12:32,520
Uh, not the story ahead.

1659
01:12:32,520 --> 01:12:33,520
Okay.

1660
01:12:33,520 --> 01:12:48,520
Uh, he was going to tear down a share station in Iowa.

1661
01:12:48,520 --> 01:12:54,520
You want to hear about the guy that got trapped in a shitter?

1662
01:12:54,520 --> 01:12:55,520
Yeah.

1663
01:12:55,520 --> 01:12:56,520
Uh, yeah.

1664
01:12:56,520 --> 01:12:57,520
Let me, yeah.

1665
01:12:57,520 --> 01:13:00,520
Tell me about him while I come up with a different one.

1666
01:13:00,520 --> 01:13:01,520
Okay.

1667
01:13:01,520 --> 01:13:06,520
A guy in Argentina, I guess, like dropped something in a port of shitter.

1668
01:13:06,520 --> 01:13:10,520
So he went to go get it and he fell face first in the shit.

1669
01:13:10,520 --> 01:13:12,520
And he was stuck there.

1670
01:13:12,520 --> 01:13:17,520
He was screaming for hours and finally someone heard him screaming, went in there and got

1671
01:13:17,520 --> 01:13:18,520
out of the shit.

1672
01:13:18,520 --> 01:13:21,520
Isn't that horrible?

1673
01:13:21,520 --> 01:13:26,520
He was face first in the shit and all he could do was scream.

1674
01:13:26,520 --> 01:13:30,520
He was probably about ready to drown in it actually.

1675
01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:31,520
Oh shit.

1676
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:32,520
Oh yeah.

1677
01:13:32,520 --> 01:13:33,520
Yeah.

1678
01:13:33,520 --> 01:13:34,520
That's the best way to put it.

1679
01:13:34,520 --> 01:13:35,520
Oh shit.

1680
01:13:35,520 --> 01:13:36,520
Oh man.

1681
01:13:36,520 --> 01:13:39,520
That's all you can say at that point.

1682
01:13:39,520 --> 01:13:43,520
I remember when we used to throw smoke bombs in those port of potties, like we'd be at

1683
01:13:43,520 --> 01:13:47,520
a concert and there'd be a bunch of port of potties and we'd wait until my brother gets

1684
01:13:47,520 --> 01:13:51,520
in there or somebody else and we'd throw a smoke bomb in there.

1685
01:13:51,520 --> 01:13:52,520
Good times.

1686
01:13:52,520 --> 01:13:53,520
Good times.

1687
01:13:53,520 --> 01:13:54,520
Oh definitely.

1688
01:13:54,520 --> 01:14:01,520
Remember that one time we had a guy back his car up so John couldn't get out of the

1689
01:14:01,520 --> 01:14:02,520
shitter?

1690
01:14:02,520 --> 01:14:09,520
Uh, I think that was more than once.

1691
01:14:09,520 --> 01:14:10,520
Yeah.

1692
01:14:10,520 --> 01:14:11,520
I think the guy's name was Clint.

1693
01:14:11,520 --> 01:14:13,520
He had that cutlass.

1694
01:14:13,520 --> 01:14:16,520
And anyhow, we're just, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1695
01:14:16,520 --> 01:14:19,520
And we're just choked around and we go.

1696
01:14:19,520 --> 01:14:20,520
Yeah.

1697
01:14:20,520 --> 01:14:24,520
And then he put his car up to it and then he left.

1698
01:14:24,520 --> 01:14:27,520
So we could get John out for a while.

1699
01:14:27,520 --> 01:14:30,520
Then finally we had to end up scooting the port of potty.

1700
01:14:30,520 --> 01:14:35,520
Four people had to scoot it gently away from Clint's car because he took off and didn't

1701
01:14:35,520 --> 01:14:36,520
come back.

1702
01:14:36,520 --> 01:14:38,520
And we thought he was going to go get a beer or something.

1703
01:14:38,520 --> 01:14:40,520
He never came back.

1704
01:14:40,520 --> 01:14:44,520
Poor John was stuck in there for quite a while.

1705
01:14:44,520 --> 01:14:47,520
Were you present on that one or not?

1706
01:14:47,520 --> 01:14:48,520
I can't remember.

1707
01:14:48,520 --> 01:14:49,520
It was at some festival.

1708
01:14:49,520 --> 01:14:52,520
I told him to park there.

1709
01:14:52,520 --> 01:14:53,520
You did?

1710
01:14:53,520 --> 01:14:54,520
Okay.

1711
01:14:54,520 --> 01:14:55,520
Yep.

1712
01:14:55,520 --> 01:14:56,520
You did have a role in it.

1713
01:14:56,520 --> 01:15:00,520
I just didn't know he was going to come back.

1714
01:15:00,520 --> 01:15:01,520
Yeah.

1715
01:15:01,520 --> 01:15:02,520
Am I right with his name?

1716
01:15:02,520 --> 01:15:03,520
Was it Clint?

1717
01:15:03,520 --> 01:15:04,520
Yeah.

1718
01:15:04,520 --> 01:15:05,520
Clint.

1719
01:15:05,520 --> 01:15:06,520
Yeah.

1720
01:15:06,520 --> 01:15:07,520
Yeah.

1721
01:15:07,520 --> 01:15:08,520
He had the cutlass.

1722
01:15:08,520 --> 01:15:10,520
He had the cutlass.

1723
01:15:10,520 --> 01:15:11,520
Oh really?

1724
01:15:11,520 --> 01:15:12,520
You know Clint still?

1725
01:15:12,520 --> 01:15:13,520
How's he doing?

1726
01:15:13,520 --> 01:15:14,520
Yeah.

1727
01:15:14,520 --> 01:15:15,520
Oh he's doing great.

1728
01:15:15,520 --> 01:15:16,520
That's cool to hear.

1729
01:15:16,520 --> 01:15:17,520
Well tell him I said hi.

1730
01:15:17,520 --> 01:15:18,520
Okay.

1731
01:15:18,520 --> 01:15:19,520
He's still up around there.

1732
01:15:19,520 --> 01:15:20,520
Yeah.

1733
01:15:20,520 --> 01:15:23,520
Are you talking about big muscle bound Clint?

1734
01:15:23,520 --> 01:15:24,520
Yeah.

1735
01:15:24,520 --> 01:15:25,520
Yeah.

1736
01:15:25,520 --> 01:15:26,520
Absolutely.

1737
01:15:26,520 --> 01:15:27,520
Yep.

1738
01:15:27,520 --> 01:15:28,520
You remember him.

1739
01:15:28,520 --> 01:15:29,520
Yeah.

1740
01:15:29,520 --> 01:15:30,520
Tell him I said hello.

1741
01:15:30,520 --> 01:15:31,520
That's cool.

1742
01:15:31,520 --> 01:15:32,520
He's on my friends list.

1743
01:15:32,520 --> 01:15:33,520
Oh I'll look him up then.

1744
01:15:33,520 --> 01:15:34,520
All right.

1745
01:15:34,520 --> 01:15:35,520
Thanks.

1746
01:15:35,520 --> 01:15:36,520
All right.

1747
01:15:36,520 --> 01:15:37,520
Hey.

1748
01:15:37,520 --> 01:15:38,520
Hey.

1749
01:15:38,520 --> 01:15:39,520
Okay.

1750
01:15:39,520 --> 01:15:40,520
All right man.

1751
01:15:40,520 --> 01:15:42,080
Let's go ahead and shut this bitch down.

1752
01:15:42,080 --> 01:15:43,080
How about that?

1753
01:15:43,080 --> 01:15:48,880
We're going to put a pretty little bow on it and kick it down the curb.

1754
01:15:48,880 --> 01:15:50,520
Thank you everybody for listening.

1755
01:15:50,520 --> 01:15:51,520
Good night assholes.

1756
01:15:51,520 --> 01:15:55,320
And we'll get back to you tomorrow night.

1757
01:15:55,320 --> 01:15:56,320
That's right.

1758
01:15:56,320 --> 01:15:57,320
You're warned.

1759
01:15:57,320 --> 01:15:58,320
Good night assholes.

1760
01:15:58,320 --> 01:15:59,320
Oh no.

1761
01:15:59,320 --> 01:16:05,040
Looks like the show's over kids.

1762
01:16:05,040 --> 01:16:09,520
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.

1763
01:16:09,520 --> 01:16:10,520
Fear not assholes.

1764
01:16:10,520 --> 01:16:13,680
They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.

1765
01:16:13,680 --> 01:16:15,720
Oh no.

1766
01:16:15,720 --> 01:16:17,560
Looks like the show's over kids.

1767
01:16:17,560 --> 01:16:22,000
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.

1768
01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:23,400
Fear not assholes.

1769
01:16:23,400 --> 01:16:39,040
They'll be back invading your ear holes soon.