And now it's time for...
The Daily Deucebag Pledge.
Here at Two Deucebags in a Microphone, we don't stand behind our journalistic integrity.
Go ahead and assume we got the story wrong. At least we admit it.
Not like all those other guys, we can and will lie if it makes the story better.
Two Deucebags and a Microphone.
We Talk.
Is a...
Hey there, fuckstick. You're just in time for brand new feature news nobody gives a shit about.
A belly dancer in Spain.
Belly danced for 48 hours beating the old world record by 5 hours.
The apocalypse just happened.
You don't know what to do. You don't know where to go.
But we can tell you what you can eat.
Dirt and apocalypse, don't forget the nuts.
Hickory nuts that is.
Yeah, we know, Hickory wood gets all the glory and all the love.
Everyone loves the Hickory trees. They cut them down and they make great sandwiches out of barbecue and meats.
They smoke them and it's a fantastic deal.
But little does anyone know about the Hickory nuts.
Dirt and apocalypse Hickory nuts could be the best thing you can find.
Hickory nuts can be eaten raw, toasted or added to various recipes.
Their rich buttery flavor and crunchy texture make them an ideal ingredient for both sweet and savory dishes.
You can use Hickory nuts to make nut butter, pesto or even a unique Hickory nut milk.
There are five types of Hickory nuts.
Bitter nut Hickory, Shag Bark Hickory, Pig Nut Hickory, Mockernut Hickory and Smooth Bark Hickory.
Hickory trees are considered part of the walnut species and are plentiful at least around Missouri and surrounding areas.
So, Dirt and Apocalypse, don't forget to grab your nuts.
Hi all, this is Chicago. I am the most dangerous city in North America.
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho. You can't touch me.
Oh yeah? This is Kansas City here. Hold my beer bitch.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper. It's strange insults from an alien. Real hilarity.
You are dressed like an assistant debate coach at an Ohio State middle school.
Oh, my God.
Two douchebags and microphone. I'm Mark.
And I am Rob.
Alright, Rob, how are you doing today?
I'm doing good. Doing really good.
Good, good, good.
I had a good day.
Good, good. Well, today is Mother's Day. You guys won't know this. I mean, well, you know it because I just said it.
But we're recording this Mother's Day. And anyhow, did you get a chance to see your mom at all, Rob, or not?
I called her.
Okay, good, good. Alright.
I spent pretty much the day with Shannon, so.
Okay, good, good.
Alright, sounds like good Mother's Day.
Yeah, it was relaxing.
That's cool. Good. That's good to hear.
So, yep, I'm doing much better than yesterday.
Yesterday I got into a coughing fit and could not quit.
So the show is a little bit shorter than normal.
And a lot of it was being paused.
And the stuff that you do here is just the stuff that I couldn't get.
So, like Rob was talking and I couldn't cut him off or whatever, you know.
So, anyhow, we'll see how it turns out.
I may put this one first and then try to doctor the other one up.
I had one hell of a cold flu, sinus, with a little extra, I don't know,
pollen count in there, I don't know.
So, anyhow, allergies, all that good shit.
It was horrible yesterday.
And you guys will hear some of it, so, anyhow.
So, alright.
You know, the sun had a huge, as once in every 30 years, huge geometrical storm.
This storm is so potent that people as far south as Florida got to witness
the spectacular northern lights.
Did you get to see any, Rob?
I did not stay up late enough.
We got done last night.
I went to bed, dude.
I was sicker than a dog, so I wanted to, but I couldn't.
And then, oh, go ahead, what?
Well, here they were supposed to be between 10 p.m. and 2 a.m.
Yes, yeah, same up here.
We got done about 9.30.
It was a little after 9.
I said, no, it's bedtime.
I don't blame you.
I'll miss them both nights.
If I felt good, I probably would have stayed up until midnight at the most.
And then, you know, if I didn't get anything by midnight, I wasn't doing it.
Hum with you, Rob.
With my alarm, you know, with my body alarm and everything,
I'm not lucky to make it to 10 o'clock anymore, man.
Dude, man, when I used to work in the mornings like I did,
I mean, if I was at the shop at 5 a.m., if I was out on the road,
usually 6 or 7 a.m., I know what you mean.
You just cannot, I could not stay up past 10 on the weekends.
If I made 10, I was happy.
I'm like, whew, I really went crazy today.
Got to 10.15.
So I get it, Rob.
And then, turn around on Sunday, I wake up at 6.30.
Yep, I used to all the time.
Come on, man.
Oh, I drive Val Nuts.
I got all this energy in the morning, and she's like looking at me like,
what the hell, what's wrong with this guy?
Did he like buy some cocaine or something?
I don't know.
I don't do it anymore now that I work more afternoon and evening.
I don't do it anymore, but man, I used to.
And I had most energy in the morning, did you?
Yeah, I do.
I get more done in the mornings than I do the afternoons.
Yeah, the same here, because I'm used to hitting the road hard.
I mean, just going on all cylinders.
Yeah, so I don't do that so much anymore, but I used to drive Val Nuts
because I'd try to be quiet, but I couldn't.
Too bad I didn't have that podcast back then.
Mornings would have been perfect to do it.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yep.
Well, the one we did the other day in the morning, I thought turned out pretty good.
Yeah, I think you did, too.
Yeah, I liked it.
We were a slightly different tempo during the day, would you agree?
Well, yeah, I'm not all wore out, you know.
Yeah, yeah, it's interesting.
We'll probably do more of them as we have to adjust our schedules and all that.
Right, right.
Okay, well, anyhow, there have been thousands of really good pictures
and videos of these lights from Georgia to Mississippi to Missouri
to all points north and south in between.
So how about if we find out what causes this phenomenon,
as in the northern lights, right?
So northern lights are caused by coronal mass ejections
or explosions of plasma and magnetic material shooting out of the sun,
colliding with the Earth's magnetic field,
as those ejections known as CMEs smack into our magnetic field.
Currents send particles into the north and south poles.
So in other words, I don't know.
Sounds good to me, whatever it is.
Yeah.
Yeah, these things come out and they hit against us,
and we've got some sort of magnetic field,
and I guess that's just like the sparks that are created
when whatever shards out of the sun comes over and hits us,
and then our magnetic field like, you know...
Does that sound good?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's exactly what happened right there.
Yeah.
Okay, so today is Mother's Day, like we said.
So a huge thank you to all the wonderful mamas out there.
You guys are the bread of life.
You are the everything.
Yes, thank you, Mom.
Yeah, thank you, Mom, and all the moms out there.
You give us life, and you wipe our ass.
That's a perfect human being, isn't it?
Yes, it is.
Yeah, and also dinner.
What the hell else?
Wow.
Yeah.
So anyhow, if your mother has a sweet tooth,
you could find her a box of new fruity Cheerios.
That's right, the very unfun adult cereal
is now trying to find its sense of humor.
Or perhaps maybe you could try to find her a box of peach
and mango Cheerios as well.
Suddenly Cheerios sounds fun with the new younger hit varieties,
don't you agree?
Yeah.
I mean, I've never been a really big fan of Cheerios.
They're okay.
They're kind of a boring cereal.
Yeah.
I mean, you know, they're like round pieces of oats
somehow processed or whatever.
But fruity Cheerios doesn't sound too bad,
and peach mango Cheerios sounds kind of good.
Yeah, that does.
So anyhow, if your mom has a sweet tooth,
maybe you should get her some of those, just a suggestion.
So okay, let's say your mom isn't into cereal.
How about some AGO fully loaded waffles?
I'm not a mom, but that sounds great to me.
What about you?
Yeah, that sounds awkward.
Fully loaded waffles, but in an AGO.
Oh, shit.
That's like up there with lasagna almost.
Are you talking about loaded with every breakfast food?
Yes, that's what I'm talking about.
What's coffee?
Oh, my God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Marvelous.
Yeah.
That's up there with lasagna, wouldn't you say?
Yes, it's gotta be.
Yeah, because lasagna is like the holy grail.
I mean, lasagna is on the Mount Rushmore of food.
I mean, it's like one of...
It should be its own food group.
Oh, it's so good.
So you can't go wrong with lasagna.
Oh, man.
No, you can't.
So, okay, so how about you get your mom's insulin jab ready
when you go by Burger King and grab her a cotton candy cloud?
You want to know what this beautiful creation is, Rob?
Sure.
Okay, this blended iced drink tastes and looks like cotton candy.
Be sure to put your mom in a diabetic coma,
so keep the ozempic and insulin in reach and distance
when you give her this treat.
Okay, not wanting to jab your mom with a needle.
You can always get her...
Yeah, I'm the same way.
That doesn't sound very appealing, does it?
Yeah, I know.
And it's like, Mom, I'm sorry I over sugared you.
Hang on, let me go get this needle,
and I'll give you some insulin,
because your body obviously tried to shut down on you
because I sugar coma'd you.
So let's say you don't want to go the sugar route,
and I understand, and you're not into jabbing your mom with a needle.
I get that.
Try the new Popeyes Golden BBQ Chicken Sandwich.
I'm a fan without even trying one,
because Popeyes and chicken sandwiches have a superb track record.
Yeah, they do.
Remember their crispy chicken sandwich,
their spicy chicken sandwich that was so good?
Yeah, that was delicious.
Oh, that was one of the...
That is on the Mount Rushmore sandwiches, right?
Definitely.
Yeah, yeah, so as soon as I heard that,
I'm like, okay, I don't have to try it.
I don't even have to look at it.
I know I want that, and I know I'm going to love it.
So, finally, if chicken sandwich isn't her game,
and your mom really doesn't need 10 pounds of sugar at one setting,
then try some Little Caesar Crazy Puffs.
That's right, Little Caesar's, as in pizza, Crazy Puffs.
This new product, it looks like round quiche,
but it's with dough and with mozzarella cheese and pizza sauce mixed right in,
and then it is drizzled over the top with a delicious butter garlic sauce.
Sounds good to me.
Oh, yeah, my mom would love that.
Oh, man, my mom would love that, Val would love that, I would love that.
Everybody I know would love that.
That sounds like...
I don't know why I have to try them before I could say
that could be on the Mount Rushmore food, too, but you know.
Maybe you just take her out for some good old food and drink for Mother's Day.
And before I quit all this Mother Day father, oh, father, not father,
I would like to say a good mother lets you lick the beater.
A really good mother turns the beater off first.
True.
Yes.
True.
All right, Rob, you got something, and then we'll go to break after your story.
And then I have some weird questions that was sent to me in an email,
and this guy knows this really well.
He's asking me and you...
He says his name is Spartacus...
from New Hampshire.
But anyhow, go ahead with your story, and then we'll take a break,
and then we're going to come back with these Spartacus's question,
Spartacus from New Hampshire's questions to me and you.
Okay, that's got my interest.
He's got specific questions for you.
Let's wait.
Okay, go ahead.
Okay, so for Mother's Day, I have to come up with a Mother's Day story.
All right.
I'm going to make every mother that listens to our show feel better about themselves.
Hi, Grandma Opal.
Hi, Jimmy.
Hi, Ricky.
Hi, Grandma.
Hi, Jimmy.
Hi, Ricky.
We know Opal is a mother, so...
Yeah, yeah, yes.
Dodge City got some rain.
Go ahead, I'm sorry.
Yeah, yeah, they ought to be happy.
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to tell you about the five worst moms in history.
I love it already.
Okay, first up we have Mary Ball Washington.
Okay.
America's grandmother, Mary Ball Washington, as the mother of the first U.S. President,
George Washington, could give any modern day tiger mom a run for her money with her iron
willed parenting style.
Born in 1708 in Virginia, Mary was a widow managing a plantation and raising five children
by the time she was 35.
Wow.
While George was off making history, Mary was at home killing letters that my world
started with George's sin money and occasionally implying that his revolutionary activities
were giving her great errors.
Some historians like James Thomas Flexner often describe her as demanding and somewhat
possessive.
Half mommy dearest and half helicopter mother.
She'd crawl onto her son's purse strings like a general stargizing over territory.
Wow.
Yeah, yeah.
I guess she was wanting for the money, yeah, she was, whatever she, each giver she would
have.
Okay.
Wow.
That's an interesting story.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, and next one, okay, bear with me on this.
Okay.
This is from China.
Okay.
So Wu, Scythian, I'm just going to call her Wu.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine.
I don't know Chinese names worth a damn either, so what, yeah.
Yeah.
Wu sounds great.
I can handle Wu.
I can too.
China's only female emperor, 1624 to 705, may have aced the imperial exams of political
savvy and ruthlessness, but when it came to motherhood, let's just say she wasn't winning
any parenting awards.
Early in her ascent within the imperial court, Wu gave birth to a daughter in 637 AD who
died shortly after birth under suspicious circumstances.
Wu accused Empress Wang, the waning empress, of murdering the child.
The accusation led to the deposition and removal of Empress Wang from the court signifying
altering the power dynamics within the palace and sharing Wu's path to greater influence.
Okay.
So they still don't know who killed that girl.
Okay.
But it looks like she did.
Yeah, because back then, you know, postpartum depression is real and it makes mothers do
crazy stuff like that.
And they didn't have it diagnosed back then, so who knows, you know?
That's true, but yeah, it sounds like she did it to gain power.
I was giving her the benefit of the doubt, but yeah, I agree.
So it was probably to gain power.
Yeah.
Okay, next.
Queen Victoria.
Queen Victoria, known for her 60-year reign, had a topical relationship with her nine
children.
Victoria's view of motherhood was ambivalent at best.
She once admitted to having the greatest horror of having children and would rather have none.
Alas, she ended up having nine, though she didn't enjoy any bit of it.
Pregnancy was particularly loathsome to her, describing in her letters as being like a
dog or a cow.
Wow.
Yeah, there goes Mother of the Year.
Yeah.
Well, you know, the headline of this matches it, so go ahead.
Okay, next.
We have Henrietta Heddy Green, known as the Wicke of Wall Street.
Heddy Green was one of the wealthiest women in America during the 19th century.
However, her obsession with money and frugality extended to her children, whom she neglected
emotionally and deprived of proper upbringing in pursuit of financial gain.
Green's son, Edward Holland Robinson Green, was a victim of Heddy's obsession with hoarding
money, which led her to deprive Edward of basic necessities, including proper medical
care.
When he was nine, Edward injured a knee in a flooding accident.
Green, of course, refused to take him to the doctor because that would mean spending money.
And as a teen, Edward's leg became infected and gangrenous.
Green, again, refused to seek proper medical treatment and instead opted for homemade ointments,
which led to the ultimate amputation of Edward's leg.
He would spend the rest of his life limping on a cork prosthetic leg.
I would not...I would be really pissed.
What about you?
Oh my God.
I would take off my leg and beat her with it.
I told you I was bringing the five worst mothers.
You're right.
Wouldn't you like...
Every mother listening to us all feel good about themselves.
I would unscrew my prosthetic leg and beat her with it because I know they're like heavy
wood back then.
So anyhow, go ahead.
It was made out of cork.
Oh, it was made out of cork.
That's right.
Oh, shit.
He couldn't even do that.
It'd be like Heather with a swimming noodle.
Yeah.
She'd be like, what are you doing?
I'm trying to hurt you.
I'm pissing you.
You see?
People call me corky.
It's not funny.
Okay, finally.
All right.
And I'm going to have to say this should be number one.
Okay.
Mary Ann Cotton.
Mary Ann Cotton gave Medea a run for her money.
Cotton was an English serial killer who targeted those close to her for financial gain, earning
the nickname The Black Widow.
You heard her?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
But I mean, it's been used a lot over history, but she's the original, I guess.
It's believed she poisoned up to 21 people, including multiple husbands, at least 11 of
her own 13 children, promoted with financial gain through life insurance.
Cotton would pay out policies on her victims and payouts after their deaths.
She primarily used arsenic, commonly used in the Victorian England, as a weapon of choice
because it caused symptoms similar to various illnesses, making it challenging to detect
as a poison.
Authorities have suspicious about Cotton for years due to the unusual number of deaths
in her family.
However, concrete evidence was lacking until the death of her stepson, Charles Everton,
when a stronger case was built leading to her conviction and subsequent execution by
hanging in 1873.
Oh, wow.
So that is the original Black Widow.
I've heard of that story before, but I didn't know that was the original Black Widow.
Wow.
Yeah, that was, yeah, that was, yeah, she was hung in 1873.
So yeah, that's the original.
Wow.
Well, you know how, you know, a Black Widow, you know what a Black Widow does, right?
The spider.
Right, right.
You know, she mates with a male, and then she kills a male and eats it.
Yeah.
So that's how, you know, that's why they call women that are, you know, have done stuff
like that a Black Widow in case anyone was wondering.
I think everybody knew that, but if you didn't, well, there you go.
So, all right, that was great, Rob.
Thank you.
There you go, ladies.
Feel good about yourselves.
Yep, happy Mother's Day.
All right.
Let's take our first break.
We're going to come back.
Spartacus, which I'm sure is not his real name, from New Hampshire, sent us some questions,
and he knows us really well, Rob.
All right.
Okay.
All right.
And he says, you know what, I'll just say it all when we come back.
We'll be right back in a little bit.
Yep.
All right.
Jim X.
What the hell happened?
You were the generation of change.
You never wanted to be one of them.
At the theater.
Spoke for you.
Hunk the man.
Hunk the system.
What the hell happened?
The generation of angst, the generation of noncompliance is now buying a boat.
You're really fed up until someone dangled a dollar near you.
Great job, Xers.
Everything's ruined.
Tomorrow morning, while grinding your coffee beans for your double mocha latte, remember
to not get your genitals caught in the grinder.
It really hurts.
Who can afford plastic surgery?
Stay safe, everyone.
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.
Should I record frog sounds in the summer, then play them when it's zero degrees on my
ring doorbell for the Amazon guy?
Yeah, that sounds like fun.
Two dish bags and microphone in an effort to keep everything fresh.
We offer you first world problems.
Oh shit, look at that drive-thru wine.
Surely, they wouldn't expect me to actually have to go in.
This sucks.
Somewhere in the heavens, your great Grammy Gertrude is crying because her little Bevo
is listening to this film.
Have you ever wondered where something came from?
Have you ever looked at something and said, hey, I wonder what the origin of that is?
Well, so have we.
That's why we gave you The Origin of.
The Origin of Knee-high Soft Drinks.
Claude Hatcher overheard a route salesman enter the plant one day and describe the
competitor's tall bottle as being knee-high.
Knee-high originated with the Cherokella Company in Columbus, Georgia by Claude Hatcher in 1912.
And I am Rob.
OK, this guy that says his name is Spartacus from supposedly New Hampshire too.
I don't think his name is Spartacus.
He might be from New Hampshire, but anyhow, whatever.
He knows us really well, Rob.
And he has questions for us.
And this is going to be an ongoing thing.
He says that these are just the start to preliminary questions, but he has some coming up that are much more deep.
But he wants to start us out with the rather lighthearted ones.
But just by these questions, he knows us really well.
OK, so the first question is for Rob.
Rob, what is your favorite segment spoof?
I guess he calls them spoofs of the show.
And we're talking about the promos and the bits and stuff like that.
He calls them...
Man, there are so many I like.
See, he knew to hit you with that.
Because I have my answer.
I know what my favorite is.
But he didn't ask me.
Right, right.
Yeah, see, I like so many of them.
I love them all, too.
I'm sorry he's part of it.
He knew to ask you that.
Because if he asked me, I would say news no one gives a shit about.
That right now is my favorite.
I love that.
I just think it's so good to find these stupid news stories that nobody gives a shit about.
And then the other one that I'm really proud of, or there are two latter ones, is First World Problems.
I love that.
Yeah, see, my prom is, it hit me right now.
So I'm trying to go back and think of all of them right now.
I mean, there's Deep Thoughts, Things Overheard in Hell, Ramblings of a Madman with Rob Radd.
I mean...
I like them all.
Oh, you do? And then there's like, oh, the good old Strange Insults from an Alien, which kicked off the segment section.
That was the first one that we came up with.
And then it was Island of Horrible Jokes.
But I love the concept of Island of Horrible Jokes.
Okay, you're out stranded in the ocean.
And you're on a little paddle boat.
Sharks are chasing you and trying to eat you.
And you find this island.
Beautiful.
There's Wild Bordahut and everything.
But there's one stipulation.
It's the Island of Horrible Jokes.
So while you're there, you have to hear horrible jokes repeated over and over.
So, but at least the shark's not eating you.
So anyhow.
Yeah.
So you don't have one? Is that just a...
Like I said, I like so many, pretty much all of them.
Okay.
Beautiful.
Okay, and I even have a favorite one that I've ever did.
It is Deep...
I'm talking about a single one.
Deep Thoughts with Mark.
Axel Rose is such a good childhood therapist.
I hope he writes another book.
Yeah, I mean...
That's my favorite.
Oh, that and...
I like pretty much all of them.
I mean, there's so many of them.
And the Kim Jung Un is playing Santa at the mall.
Yeah.
That's the other one that I... anyhow.
Okay, the question was for you, not me.
So I'm sorry.
Yeah, yeah.
He got me on that one.
I knew he would.
When I read that, I'm like, that's fucking brilliant.
The guy knows you.
Okay, next one.
Mark.
Tuborg Gold or Lowembrow?
That is such a me question, Rob.
Is that not a me question?
Yes, that is.
Lowembrow.
And here's why.
Tuborg Gold was great too.
But Lowembrow was a darker beer and it was the first foil beer.
I mean, I think it was even before Mikolov, wasn't it?
I think so.
Yeah.
I think it was.
Yeah, I don't even know if they sell it anymore.
I'll have to look it up later.
But Lowembrow had the foil top on it.
And hang on, let me look.
I'm pretty sure.
So Lowembrow...
It was good.
Yeah, I liked it.
And it was a darker beer.
It wasn't like, you know, Guinness, but it wasn't a lager either.
I really liked it.
And I think this guy knew that Lowembrow was going to be my favorite.
But anyhow, I loved them both.
So anyhow, that was a fantastic question.
And the mere fact that he asked me and not you that, no, he knows us.
He's listened to us.
Yes, he's listened to us and examined us.
So Spartacus...
Dude, you're knocking him out of the park.
Okay, it is still sold.
And it's a German...
Lowembrow stands for Lion's Brew in German.
And it's a German brewery.
And let's see, wow.
Do, do, do, do.
I believe they still sell it from what I can tell.
The official website is in German, so I can't go there.
So anyhow.
Okay, all right, Lowembrow.
But Tuborg Gold was really good too.
And I don't even think they make Tuborg Gold anymore.
But that was another beer, but it wasn't a foil beer and it wasn't a darker beer.
It was more of a traditional premium white beer or whatever.
So anyhow.
Okay, the next question for Rob.
Pinball or tabletop hockey?
Pinball.
Me too.
Pinball.
Wasn't that a great one?
Yes.
Yeah.
Pinball because it was just, you could do it by yourself or with somebody.
Tabletop hockey, you had to have another player.
Right.
And it was fun, but you couldn't always find one of them.
So I mean, you're always, you know, if you're like me, you're always playing pinball.
So, okay, cool.
Yeah.
All right, Mark.
Bubble up or squirt?
Squirt.
Bubble up was really good.
And whenever I find bubble up in the bottles, they still make bubble up, the original formula
with pure cane sugar and natural ingredients.
And it is fantastic.
But I've always liked the kind of grapefruit kind of citrus flavor of squirt.
And squirt also makes a great mixer too.
It's kind of like Tom Collins mix, right?
So squirt, but also low bubble up.
But that was a great question for me.
Yeah, it was.
All right, Rob.
Frisbee or hide and seek?
Frisbee.
Hide and seek for me, but Frisbee is great too.
I played many hours Frisbee with my buddies.
Yep, or hacky sack.
Remember that?
Yeah, yeah.
Well, he asked.
Technically it would be hacky sack, but he said Frisbee.
So yeah, I played a lot of Frisbee when I was younger.
With our sweats and with the calves, rolled up pasture calves?
No, actually I never did.
I never did.
In jeans and cowboy boots.
Oh, like jeans and shoes or some sort of Tenny runner somehow.
But yeah, but most of the hacky sack players dressed like that because they were stoners.
Yeah.
Anyhow.
All right, Mark.
I dream of Jeannie or Gilligan's Island.
Gilligan's Island all day, even though Jeannie was hot.
But so was Mary Ann.
Matter of fact, Mary Ann or Jeannie?
Mary Ann.
Mary Ann, same here.
Wow.
Okay.
Jane Jane girl.
Yep.
Yeah, she was just fantastic with that plaid checkered shirt that was tied exposing her
belly button.
Oh, yeah.
Don't get much better than that.
All righty.
Rob, Stucky's or Waffle House?
Waffle House.
Yeah.
Stucky's was cool and everybody loves the Stucky's log.
Remember those?
Yeah.
I've always been more of a Waffle House person.
Me too.
The only thing I didn't like.
You go in there at three o'clock in the morning, drink one cup of coffee and you're sober,
dude.
You're not kidding.
That shit that they served was so strong.
I mean, it made meth look like a starter drug.
That's how strong that shit was.
Man, yeah, that stuff was something else.
The only thing I didn't like about Waffle House was this.
You could not get gravy there.
They would smother your hash browns with chili, but no gravy.
That's true.
That's the only thing I didn't like about them.
But that's where I can go to Stucky's.
Stucky's had great sausage gravy.
Big chunks of sausage in them.
But I liked Waffle House better.
Their omelets and everything to me was better.
We had a Waffle House there in Belton and there's Waffle House in Grandview.
Yeah, yeah.
Did you ever have the T-bone steak and eggs?
Yes.
That was one of my favorites.
Oh my God, yeah.
As a matter of fact, for a few years, Denise worked at Grandview Waffle House for years.
Okay, Denise, your ex?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Is she doing all right or do you know anything about her?
Yeah, she's doing fine.
Oh, good.
She's out and we sell it and she's doing good.
No, that's good to hear.
She was always really nice.
Yeah, Ray, my son and his girlfriend, despite being awesome, peculiar.
Oh, cool.
And is Ray her son?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
She milded.
Okay, cool.
Well, that's good to hear.
Awesome.
Okay, Mark, Guy's Green Onion or Kitty Clover Sour Cream and Chive?
That is a close one.
Do you remember Kitty Clover?
Yeah, yeah, I do, but I got to go Guy's.
I got to go Guy's Green Onion, too.
No, no, no.
I got to go Guy's Green Onion, too.
Those things were superb.
But Kitty Clover Sour Cream and Chive was really close.
If you couldn't get the Guy's Green Onion, you could go Kitty Clover Sour Cream and Chive,
and it was almost as good.
And then final of this batch of questions, Rob, O. Henry or Chunky?
O. Henry.
So you didn't like the square chunks of chocolate, Chunky?
Or you liked O. Henry better?
I did, but I liked O. Henry's better.
O. Henry's were good.
I think I like him a little bit better, too.
Okay, cool.
Well, that's it of this batch.
He says he has more.
So Spartacus from...
Thank you, Spartacus.
Yeah, thank you.
Spartacus from New Hampshire.
We appreciate that.
You know us pretty well.
That's all I can say.
Yeah, you've done your homework.
That's for sure.
You know, we used to play pranks on people, right, Rob?
Yeah.
We had a lot of fun doing that, too.
I mean, whether it was a phone prank to the MTV at the mall prank to...
Just like introducing someone new when we're working at Justin James.
And the first thing we do is we take their hand and put it on someone's nuts real quick.
You know, we were just always pranking people, and that was our MO.
People used to go, watch out for those fuckers.
They will prank you.
You know, like we'd get them really drunk and happy at work at six in the morning.
We'd wake them up at ten-tell, and they got ten minutes to get there.
We'd have their eyebrows fucking sawed off and old baby ones, painted fingernails and toes.
That's when it wasn't acceptable.
Now, guys, kids, we're fingernail polishing stuff all the time, but anyhow.
Or we'd put something on their back.
So anyhow.
Yeah, you never knew.
This prank was rather mean.
Pizza prank gone too far.
A Spruce Grove man harassed by pizza.
He's been sent $1,000 worth of pizza at a time.
Someone would order pizzas from all over the county and send them to this guy at work and at home.
And this is...
I wonder who he pissed off.
I know, that's what I said too.
You talk about...think of all the effort that takes.
I mean, even if it's on the internet, you've got to hit all these websites up and everything.
And then you've got to, you know, you've got to put in the address and all that stuff.
But it was all cash on delivery.
So the guy that did it wasn't even paying for the pizzas.
This guy was getting like ten pizzas at a time from different pizza companies.
And he said that he pissed off a lot of delivery drivers.
But he said, man, he goes, I did not order these pizzas.
And I don't think this is still going on, but it went on for a couple of months.
And the dude was furious and he doesn't know who did it.
That is a fantastic prank, isn't it?
Yeah, yeah.
So you prankster, you little trickster out there.
Great job.
Remember, remember the cowboy guy I used to work with that used to call me, oh, you're such a little trickster, Mark.
That I did the Cape Hulk trick to.
You know, yeah, he's got a he kind of he kind of move his little cowboy hat around.
You're such a trickster, Mark.
You're just a real humdinger, aren't you?
Yeah.
OK, this guy was a real, real trickster, a real humdinger.
He got the guy really good.
Anyhow, I commend him.
That was a great job, whoever that was.
So, anyhow, Rob, we look to you.
OK.
Eleven actor and legitimate New York City hero Steve Bishimi was the victim of a rain in the path while walking the streets of the Big Apple last week.
The 66 year old star of Fargo Reservoir Dogs and the Big Lebowski and numerous other classics was the latest celebrity to be randomly attacked in broad daylight over the last few years.
Following the likes of Rick Moranis and Michael Stolberg.
Well, he's a pretty tough guy, too.
Bishimi is not a pussy.
Wow.
No, he's not.
He was a firefighter.
Right.
Anyhow, go ahead.
I'm sorry.
According to the New York Post, Bishimi was attacked last week while walking in the Kips Bay neighborhood on the east side of Manhattan.
A bomber reportedly walked up to the actor, struck him and thread the scene.
The assailant has yet to be caught.
In the face?
Bishimi is fortunately doing just fine following the attack.
He had a swollen left eye and face after the attack and was treated at Bellevue Hospital.
Appointed to police, the attack occurred at 1148 A.N. on Wednesday off of Third Street.
I'm surprised Bishimi didn't run that guy down and plow his face into the concrete.
It probably caught him by surprise.
This is done on comic book.
But the story goes on.
I'm not going to go into it.
But it goes on talking about how he was a New York firefighter before he got into acting.
As a matter of fact, 9-11, he went and volunteered.
He went back and volunteered during 9-11.
Yeah, he's a hero there.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
I'm surprised someone did that to Bishimi.
I'm surprised Bishimi didn't grab that guy and smash him in the damn pavement.
Too bad he didn't.
Right.
But I imagine it probably caught him off guard.
You know what I mean?
You don't have reaction time.
He just walked down the street and wham.
Yeah, someone just smacks you in the eye.
First thing you're doing is covering yourself up and going,
Fuck, what happened?
The guy was gone by then.
Anyhow, that's a real fucking asshole that did that.
What else can you say?
I don't know if it's the same guy, but they're the people.
Yeah, there's been more than the people that you mentioned that that's happened to.
It's a weird deal.
I don't know if it's a psychotic thing or if it's a TikTok thing.
I don't know if it's the same person, but it's not good.
I don't care if you like or dislike somebody.
You don't go around and smack them in the head like that.
Yeah, well, they're doing it to celebrities.
Yes, well, most of them.
Not Steve Buscemi, but some other ones would be fine with me.
Be fine with me.
Anyhow.
All right.
Let's take a break.
I'm going to go grab a low and brow and crack it open.
All right.
All right, we'll be right back.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.
It's strange insults from an alien.
Real hilarious.
You have the personality of a soggy newspaper.
When taking a shower, remember to scrub your asshole with soapy water
because nobody likes a stinky asshole.
Oh shit, what's that over there?
Oh no, it's an island of horrible jokes.
I can't take my dog to the lake.
The ducks keep attacking him.
That's what I get for having a purebred dog.
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.
It's strange insults from an alien.
Real hilarity.
May, your five-year-old neighbor have all their violin lessons
during all of your hangovers.
Now it's time for pick up lines from a loser.
There's something wrong with my phone.
At age 30, you've spent a month celebrating birthdays.
Hello, this is Satan.
You're a fucking
Hello, this is Satan.
You might know me from my pet name, Inflation.
I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than
listening to two douchebags in microphone by a nice warm fire at night.
I sit there and I reflect on all the souls I burned that day.
Enjoy.
Oh, Lord, that man just saw a puppy in half.
Hey there, don't worry.
I have a clown nose.
Oh, no, that drunk guy just hit my child.
It's okay.
I have a clown nose.
Clown nose, just put one on and you can do anything.
Want to run for office?
Murder people in public?
Just grab a clown nose and bam, everyone laughs.
Clown noses are sold at gag stores online and pedophile conventions.
Grab one today and make magic happen.
At two douchebags in microphone, I'm Mark.
I'm Rob.
All right.
Okay, I've got this new story here.
Okay, this is a thing and I kind of get it because I've been bitching about it for a while.
It's called tipping fatigue.
Okay?
Hello?
And that's fatigue from all the people that want tip now.
I mean, I knew you tipped your hairdresser.
I knew you tipped the concierge at a hotel that helps you out.
I knew you tipped the waiter.
Your mailman, if he really goes above and beyond for you, we always give him a Christmas present.
That's our form of tipping because he's a really good mailman.
He always watches out for us and if something's gone wrong, he knows and he figures it out for us.
So we always give him a really nice gift card for Christmas and he's a really good guy.
So anyhow, all those I knew that you tipped, right?
But now, you know, like we're talking about and I have a gripe about is you're ordering to go.
You go pick it up, right?
People are making the food and you have to walk into the establishment, talk to someone, get the food, and then leave and go home.
So why does someone deserve a tip just for having that food on a counter, right?
And then they give you the suggestions.
15, 20, 25 percent.
It's like, fuck you.
If I leave anything, it's going to be a couple of bucks because someone that didn't really have anything to do with my order shouldn't get 20 percent or 25 percent.
Pay them a little bit better.
I don't care.
You know, whatever.
But people have tipping fatigue because virtually since covid, everybody wants tipped before like essential workers got tipped because they were pretty much risking their life.
Right. Yeah.
Yeah. So like someone was at a restaurant and and really, you know, they're working and everyone else is like stuck at home because of covid.
People who throw them extra tips because, man, you know, they could get covid and potentially die.
So, you know, they got a little bit more.
But now that none of that is the same, you know, how come all these tips have been left on everything?
Right. So anyhow, with the rapid rise of tipping culture post pandemic, consumers face more opportunities to tip for a wider range of services than ever before.
A trend also referred to tip creep.
So it's tipping fatigue and tip creep.
And that means that tips are creeping into everything.
But recent surveys show shoppers are experienced tip fatigue and starting to go out to tipping places less because then it goes into guilt tipping.
OK.
So when you look at this web page and you're ordering three burgers and I don't know some wings and stuff for the whole family, OK, you don't watch the football game.
You're going to watch a chiefs game or whatever.
You're in Jack stack and you get on that web page and it says how much would you like to tip 20 percent 25 15.
Right. OK.
If you don't do that, then that is guilt tipping.
If you don't do that, you feel guilty.
So you go ahead and tip and you tip a decent amount because you feel guilty for not doing it because you assume everyone else is doing it.
So when you go there to get the food, you don't want to be that guy when you walk in there grabbing your food.
Oh, that's the guy that didn't tip us.
OK. Looks like he's doing pretty well.
Look, Jordance jeans and Nike.
I don't even know if they sell Jordance jeans anymore, but you know what I mean?
Oh, look at that necklace.
That's a high dollar necklace and that guy can't afford to throw us a couple of bucks.
So anyhow, I got to where I don't give a shit.
You know what I mean?
I'll walk in any place and if they give me a weird look or an attitude, I'll be like, fuck you, man.
I don't have to give you anything.
So Rob, that was pretty much the end of the story.
I could go into more of it, but I think everyone got the gist of what I'm saying.
So anyhow, Rob, it's your turn.
All right. Oh, question.
Have you had any emails about my fake story?
No, you're free.
I'm two and one.
Yep, I'm two and one also.
So I was going to wait for you.
Let's go ahead and give her fake stories out sometime this week.
It could be any episode.
I thought we weren't going to give them out anymore.
Oh, did we stop?
Well, that's what you said.
That's right.
That way they could come back at any time and drive us.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
That's what you said.
We don't want to buy it.
It was.
I've forgotten.
Anyhow, okay, Rob.
All right.
But yeah, the reason why I asked is I'm going to tell you where this came from.
Okay.
This came from the New York Post.
Okay.
It says, Bassett-Buris Express Shipping.
A United States Postal Service employee is accused of driving over a hundred mile an hour in a work van as she drag raced a Mustang sports car down Ohio Road last month.
Newly released body cam footage shows.
The footage shows a Sandusky County police officer approached the USPS van after the driver Drew Brown, 28, was caught racing to a 60 mile an hour zone on April 21st.
Is there a reason you're going a hundred to big wheels or deputy asked Brown.
I didn't realize I was going that fast, she tells the officer nonchalantly.
Yeah, I mean, the Mustang took off.
We caught my attention.
And then you blew by him and I was pacing you like a hundred and five, the officer replies.
Wow.
The deputy then asked her why she took off so fast.
I mean, I shouldn't have Brown said.
The USPS employee denied knowing the driver behind the Mustang wheel while the officer slammed Brown for driving around acting ridiculous on I-90.
The deputy then tells Brown he was across from them when they both appeared to take off at a stop light.
When I see him take off, I go, you may you have my attention.
And then you went by.
I'm like, oh, you got to be kidding me.
He tells Brown.
The officer tells Brown that the Mustang driver saw him coming up for behind did the right thing and started slow down.
But the worker continued to speed off.
The driver was pulled over about five miles later.
Wow.
That's crazy.
Yeah, it is.
She was however made to pay a $50 fine for traffic violation and was given a verbal warning for racer.
She got lucky.
Yes, she did.
Yeah, that is a felony right there.
Yes, she really got lucky.
Real quick before I go into the next story.
Drumroll.
Rob.
Yeah.
We have a new United States leader of cities.
Boardman, Oregon, we believe, has taken over Des Moines for the top US city, and they're even above Purdue, Canada.
Wow.
Yes.
And then Des Moines is still hot and heavy on us.
Ashburn, North Carolina, is above Kansas City.
Just barely doing really well.
But the guy, the ones that's coming on strong, Harrisonville has always been strong.
But Columbus, Ohio is up in the top one.
Let's see.
One, two, three, four, five, six.
They're number seven.
So thank you, Columbus, Ohio.
Getting a lot of traction there for whatever reason.
Thank you.
So I know nothing about the radio there.
So I mean, I don't know.
You know, I don't know if they have great radio there or crappy radio or whatever.
But whatever the case is, thank you.
Thank you, guys.
And I've got to produce these promos.
I have the bits of them.
I got to put them together.
And that's for every single market that we do well in.
We're going to thank them personally with a promo.
So thank you, everybody.
Everybody listening.
Yes.
OK, here real quick.
Groceries are the hottest new splurge category for Gen Z and millennials.
Younger generations spend more on groceries than any other categories, a McKinsey report says.
But all generations are feeling the pinch of inflation at the grocery store.
Splurging one meant spending money on buzzy restaurants, expensive vacations, and designer clothing.
These days, what's considered splurge worthy falls into a more humble category.
Groceries are shaping up to be a top spending priority for younger generations.
A February report at McKinsey and Company found.
The firm asked over 4,000 people from Baby Boomers to Gen Z about their categories of splurging that they intend to splurge on this year.
Groceries ranked highest for millennials and Gen Zers.
Outpace in restaurant, bars, travel, beauty and personal care, apparel and fitness.
Millennials are also becoming parents, which means they spend more money on themselves, their partners and their children.
It's a notable shift from 2018 when older generations like Baby Boomers and Gen Xers still spent more on groceries than millennials.
So what's going on is Gen Zers and millennials are not going on lavish vacations.
They're not buying an overpriced sports car.
They're not buying an overpriced loft.
They're buying groceries and everything else is meager.
Interesting, isn't it?
Yeah, it is.
It's interesting that they choose to celebrate life like that.
You know what I mean?
And that's fine. It just surprises me that those generations are doing that.
I didn't think that food would come in.
I would think that the way I thought and I guess obviously I was wrong is, oh, okay, Domino's Pizza is cheap.
You know, Taco Bell is cheap.
I thought that they would be more like getting Taco Bell and then having a nice car to go get Taco Bell in.
But I guess not.
All right, Rob, you got something?
Yeah, I do.
All righty.
I'm going to jump to the Mike Tyson and Jake Paul fight.
Yay, I can't wait.
An article that I read.
Mike Tyson 58 has sent his upcoming boxing opponent, Jake Paul, 27, a message ahead of the fight on July 20th.
The high-way anticipated match at the AT&T Stadium in Arlington, Texas will see the boxing legend come out of retirement.
In a recent interview, American musician and host Damien Elliott warned Paul to stay clear of Tyson.
Jake, I've known Mike since he smacked the shit out of me at 14 years old.
My face has never been the same, Elliott said.
However, Tyson pleaded with Paul and urged him to go ahead and not withdraw from the fight.
Do it, Jake. Please. Don't listen to this man.
Jake, don't listen to him. Please. Tyson hit back.
It comes after Paul vowed that he or Tyson will die during the fight.
Speaking to USA Today, Paul said, I love Mike. I'm super respectful of him.
It's an honor to be in the ring with him, but I have to end him.
It's war. All is fair in love and war.
I love the guy, but as soon as it turns into a pro fight, one of us has to die.
Do you believe it? Do you believe that? Go ahead.
I think that if anybody could bring Tyson out of retirement, it would be Jake Paul.
Just because of him and his brothers, the way they came in, and they just all of a sudden, boom.
And they were all over everything. People wanted to bring him down a notch.
Yeah, I think that's part of it. Yes, I agree with that.
I mean, I love the idea. Mike Tyson is working out furiously.
He looks fantastic. How old is he? 58.
A 58 year old man in great shape has the ability to beat a younger guy like that.
It seems rather impossible, but if anyone could, it probably would be Mike Tyson.
He's hard to knock out. He gets so much. I'm trying to think of how to say this.
It's not anger. It's like determination. Tunnel vision.
He gets tunnel vision on someone, and he just knows he's going to knock them out.
I think he still has that in him. You and I think it's going to be a good fight, right?
Yeah, I think it's going to be a good fight, but I think Tyson's going to have to just come out and pound him like he used to do.
Because here's my reason. Mike is older now. He's going to have a harder time breathing.
I agree. You know what I mean? Jake is 27. He's young.
Yeah, so Mike's going to have to come out and be Iron Mike Tyson.
If this goes into four rounds, Mike Tyson's losing.
Yeah, yeah. He's going to have to come out and show this boy who he used to be.
Yeah, and also if it goes three rounds or under, I think that the odds are for Mike Tyson.
Yeah.
I don't think Jake Paul's going to reach in there and knock Mike Tyson out, but I think that Mike Tyson can reach in there and knock Jean Paul out.
I'm sure he could.
Yeah. So when was the fight? I forgot.
July 20th.
Okay. We're still good.
At AT&T Stadium in Arlington, Texas.
We almost have three months waiting, and it's going to hit a fever pitch too. You know that, right?
People, especially the week leading up to, the odds are going to go up and down.
There's probably going to be a couple stories come out of each one of them.
Like Mike Tyson was seen boozing and partying it up or something.
People are like, oh, I'm going to go to Jake Paul, and then Jake Paul, I don't know, shows him eating a couple of turkey sandwiches over, you know, I don't know. Who knows?
You know what I mean? There's going to be some hype. There's going to be some lies. There's going to be some trick camera stuff. It's going to be really good.
And this is cool because this, the sweet science, there's nothing like it, in my opinion.
They, that real original boxing with real, I'm talking about real competitors.
That was, that stuff can never be duplicated ever again. It was so good.
I mean, just like the rope-a-dope from Muhammad Ali.
Okay.
Where he literally is just a punching bag for like five rounds.
So he wore, um, um, with Frasier out, Joe Frasier out.
And then one, I mean, um, Muhammad Ali got it. No, Joe Frasier got his jaw broke and kept fighting.
These guys hated each other. Muhammad Ali used to make fun of them all the time.
And Joe Frasier hated him. I mean, he would just, I believe even in the later years, he still wouldn't speak to Muhammad Ali.
If that's correct, I believe that's correct.
And then it went on from there, you know, there was, um, Joe Holmes. He was great.
You know, there was, um, let's see, um, Riddick Bowe.
Um, there was Lennox Lewis.
Uh, oh, George Foreman.
Tyson.
Um, Holyfield.
There were so many of these great fights, just classic.
Sugar Ray Leonard.
Yeah, Sugar Ray Leonard. Roberto Duran.
Um, yeah.
Oh, we could keep going.
Yeah. We'll never get that caliber of boxing back.
It's just not that popular and not that many people are going into it because of the CTE and you know.
So they're going to another stuff like beating their faces in and, you know, with, uh, with the kickboxing, um, you know, and all that stuff.
So anyhow.
Yeah.
Yeah. Anyhow.
All right, man. I can't wait.
Uh, personally, I'm going to love this and I'm going to cherish it because it might be the last decent boxing match we ever see.
I, I'm, I'm starting to think so.
Unless this may give it a kickstart. You never know.
I would love that.
I would love to have a fallback sport to go to when football wasn't around.
Right.
And the thing I used to love about boxing was you had four or five months of this anticipation and, you know, and just can't wait for it.
And then the boxing day, you're like, all right, man, tonight at eight o'clock, it goes down and, um, you know, you'd sit there.
I used to get so excited that I couldn't sit down.
I'd be standing up watching it, you know, because, yeah, that's how into it.
I was really loved it.
So anyhow, that's cool.
I remember when it was like a weekly show, you know.
Oh, there was always boxing on. Yeah.
You could do it on Saturday afternoon.
You didn't even know and people around the world would be watching it.
Yeah. I mean, and the undercards were really good too.
You'd see the up and comers on the undercards.
You know, you'd see if you bothered to tune in two hours before the main event, you could watch the guys coming up, the 10 and 0s and the 11 and 1s, you know, and stuff like that.
So and then when you got to like the champs, usually they're like 40 and one or 39 and three, you know.
So anyhow, all right, let's see here.
Is there no end to the exciting innovations bestowed by the world to the world by Mountain Dew?
In the past year alone, the brand has brought us fruitcake flavored Mountain Dew, fruitquake, Buffalo Wild Wings specific Mountain Dew,
Ozy Hard Mountain Dew, Baja Blast and released Mountain Dew Pitch Black and Mountain Dew Flaming Hot.
So now they have a new one.
It's Mountain Dew Baja Blast with fiery habanero peppers, green chilies, tomatillos or tomatillos or however you want to call them and jalapenos.
Be warned that this spicy sauce is going to be in super hot demand because it will be in a very short supply.
Mountain Dew is creating only 750 bottles and not planning to sell them in stores.
The scarcity may be hard to swallow, but the good news is that the brand has given those bottles away and you'll have a chance to score a bottle.
So you just visit Mountain Dew dot com on any social platform.
And that would be, you know, like Instagram, Facebook or anything.
And all you have to do is enter to win one.
I would like to win one just to, it's a hot sauce. It's not like a canned drink.
Right.
So anyhow, you got something Rob or we're going to wrap this bitch up and put a bow on it?
Yeah, I got a quick little one here.
Alrighty.
Okay, I wouldn't know about this, but I'm sure you would.
Okay.
The reason why there's still ashtrays on airplanes.
I don't know that.
All U.S. domestic flights became non-smoking in 1990.
And this was the beginning of an even greater restrictions on in-flight smoking.
Not only in the U.S., but in most parts of the world. Aviation historian Shay Oakley tells Travel and Leisure,
very few airlines anywhere allow for smoking on board today.
So why do you still find ashtrays on airplanes?
As with just about everything on a plane, it's about safety.
Okay.
They're there so if someone were to break the rules, they would dispose of the cigarette in the ashtray,
as opposed to say a craftsman for the plannables.
Oh, wow.
With Robert Antolin, chief operating officer, up in the air, and fires on planes for a serious threat.
Oh, yeah, I would think so.
Well, okay, number one, I haven't noticed an ashtray on a plane ever.
But I believe they're there.
They must be up near the cockpit where the waitress station is, I bet.
That might be.
Yeah, because I don't see them in general population on a plane.
Like I said, I've never been on a plane.
Okay. So they must be talking about them up there.
What'd you say?
Yeah, I don't know.
Like I said, I don't know.
I'm just going off the story.
Okay.
Yeah, according to them, I guess they've stole a lot of planes with ashtrays.
They probably all do for that specific reason.
But instead of them being on every arm rest, they're probably only up there near the waitress station.
And that's if they do catch some dumbass smoking, they grab it and just throw it in there.
There's probably one up there and then one in back, in the very back at the waitress station there.
Or not waitress, but whatever you call it, flight attendant station.
That's where they get your soda pops and your juices and your coffees, the occasional sandwich, you know.
That's where they prepare them all.
So, okay, excellent.
I had no idea, Rob, but that does make sense now that you said it.
All right, everybody.
Thank you for joining us.
Have a great evening.
Good night, assholes.
Oh, no.
Looks like the show's over, kids.
Mark has explosive diarrhea and can't afford a wireless mic.
Fear not, assholes.
We'll be back invading your ear holes soon.