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Hello everybody, this is Two Douchebags and Microphone on the Mark part of it.
And I am Rob.
Alright, well Rob, we're going to get to the Harry Asshole Olympics in a little bit. But first I got a couple of stories and Rob probably has something he wants to get to also.
First, so you'll just have to sit tight and find out who wins this round of the Harry Asshole Olympics.
And the Harry Asshole Olympics is simply this. We rate who we think of a popular person who would have a harrier asshole.
The person that we both vote, and Tofer has a deciding vote, so if we both are kind of in a deadlock and can't figure it out, we send it to Tofer.
And Tofer sends it back and says, hey so and so should win. So that's how that is done.
And so that's coming up though. But first, you know that Gen Z's habits are quickly bringing them into debt.
And many are pledging to cut back on drinking to reach their financial goals.
See I didn't think drinking was a big thing with Gen Z's because they have all these mocktails and stuff right? That they love.
Yeah, I wouldn't take to drinking.
No, I wouldn't either because you know they have these fancy mocktails that they call them that don't have anything.
And also another thing that's coming in popular is zero beers. The beers with no alcohol or calories in them.
Or barely any calories in them. You see that's why I thought Gen Zers wouldn't be susceptible to being alcoholics.
Was because these no alcohol beers and these mocktails are all the rage.
So what do they do? They drink a couple of them and then go to some drinks? Maybe?
I don't know. But anyhow.
I don't know.
Alright, together 27% of all drinkers and 45% of Gen Z drinkers said alcohol had negatively impacted their finances.
And I think me and Rob back in the day could attest to that.
That yes, alcohol does negatively impact your finances.
Well part of this overspending on alcohol can be associated with the common mistakes that any generation faces in their youth.
There is also some real economic reasons leading Gen Z into a path of debt for their drinking.
It's a big big deal Lending Tree Chief Credit Analyst Matt Schultz told Newsweek.
They likely don't have the financial wiggle room in their budgets that their older counterparts might have.
They haven't yet reached their prime earning years and are taking home less money and probably don't have saving cushions like others might have.
I don't think anyone has savings cushions anymore with prices and every fucking thing.
Yes.
Garrett Bermiller, a 26 year old living in New York City is one of Gen Zers who seen the hard hit on his bank account after a night of drinking.
He said at one time he easily spent over $100 on bottles for just one night.
I think the reason this is so cut- well here, okay Rob, you see what's wrong with that?
$100 on bottles? We knew how to thrift shop.
We got Night Train, we got Natty Light, we got the Rot Boon Farm.
No, okay, but did you say he went to a bar?
Um, it said bottles.
Or he just bought, he just bought.
He said at one time-
Here's how it's worded.
Okay, he said it hit on his bank account after a night of drinking.
He said at one time he easily spent over $100 on bottles for just one night.
So-
Damn.
Okay, that sounded weird.
Okay, well that could have been anything.
Yes, so if he's at a bar $100 isn't anything, I understand that.
But if he's not at a bar, he doesn't know how to thrifty drink like we did and we could give him some pointers.
Right?
Right.
After the first three, you don't care what the taste is.
So, my suggestion-
I just did a report just here a while back about cheap whiskey.
Yeah, yeah, it's simple.
Or bourbon, no it was bourbon, not whiskey.
It was bourbon, well yeah, close enough.
So, okay, to this gentleman here, Garrett Bumiller, the 26 year old living in New York City, here is my suggestion.
You buy three really nice drinks up ahead and then rock gut from there on.
You get hammered on the three really nice drinks up ahead and then you don't care what they taste like after the three.
That's a secret.
So you don't know-
No.
Okay, I think the reason it is so common is that alcohol is so ingrained into socializing, especially when you're young.
Bumiller told Newsweek, I'm lucky that I've had to deal with the repercussions short term as a side effect of social outings.
But for those that go out often, I can imagine how much it damages them financially.
Well, while going out and paying for it has always been a common activity for the young, Bumiller thinks Gen Z might have it especially bad.
I also think it's instinctively tied to specific struggles that this generation has to face that others before didn't, Bumiller said.
Alcohol and alcohol culture has always been around, but before overindulgent didn't hit as hard as it does now.
So Rob, did you have anything you want to go into on that? Is there something that-
Well, no, I didn't hear it at the beginning of it.
Okay.
You mentioned it was in New York.
Well, that's, yeah. Rob, that's a great point.
Okay, look at the price difference between New York and here in Missouri.
Yeah.
And what them bottles would cost.
That's-
That would be higher there.
That's a great point. That is a great point right there.
Well, Bumiller, Mr. Bumiller, move out of New York, you might be able to afford more alcohol.
So, I don't know what else to say.
That may have been Boone's Farm.
That may have been Boone's Farm, you're right.
That's, Rob, I think you hit the nail right on the head there.
Well, I mean, I still understand. I mean, dude, back in the 90s, I spent over $100 quite a few nights.
Yeah, that's true. I mean, I have too.
Well, back in the 90s.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, especially like if you were taking the girl out in particular and trying to impress them a little bit.
You know what I mean? It was easily to run into a couple of hundreds just like that. Easily.
Oh, no, I just ran into my buddies at the bar.
Oh, okay. Well, that too. That too. But what really hit my bank account a lot was trying to impress ladies.
Yeah.
Yeah, go ahead, get whatever you want. Really, you're thinking, oh, fuck, I shouldn't have said that.
No, I still did that too.
Yeah.
I made decent money then.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, I did too, but it still runs into quite a bit of money.
And the next day you're looking through your bank account going, shit, what did I do? Oh, my God.
Then we ordered this. Oh, shit. I remember ordering that. I don't even like calamari. You know, all that stuff.
So anyhow, yeah, well, Jen's ears. I don't know, man. It's a tough life, isn't it? Yeah.
Anyhow, you got something you want to go into, Rob?
Yeah, I got a little sad one here.
All right.
Something that I ran across today. It was posted one day ago on celebrities.
Okay.
Portie star Tony Ganoz has died. He was 64. Which one was he?
Well, I'm going to go into that.
Okay, sorry.
According to TMZ, the actor had been admitted to a New York hospital over the weekend and it was discovered that he had had severe spinal cord infection.
Ganoz was taken into surgery on Saturday, but died on Sunday after suffering a heart attack.
Ganoz was an actor during the 70s and 80s. His first film role was in director Philip Kaufman's The Launders in 1979.
However, he was most famous for his role as Anthony Meat-Paprero.
Okay.
Before Deuce franchise. Meat died, man.
Meat died, damn it.
Meat died.
What a sad world.
I'm sorry. I don't know if our listeners are old enough, but we definitely remember the Porkies movies.
Well, it's like we always say.
Yeah, we remember meat.
If you don't know what it is, Google it.
Look it up.
Just like I'm sure someone's going to call bullshit on us here on some story that we spoke of.
So, maybe this podcast, maybe this one, who knows.
Anyhow, yeah, we'll see.
Well, I've got a story of Wendy's giving away free hamburgers here.
So I think we're all on board with that.
Then after that, maybe we can take us a little break and go into the hairy asshole Olympics.
Rob, you've been keeping track of it.
So this is the second round in the second Battle Royale, I guess, in the second round.
Or what would you call it?
This is our fourth round.
See, Rob knows his own.
Our fourth season.
Fourth season, okay.
And this is our second battle.
Our second battle in our fourth season.
We took 10 apiece and one band.
The band, my band, Three Dog Night, moves on.
And we took five apiece.
Yep.
Somehow we ended up with five apiece.
That's good.
I like it. Good, evenly matched.
Very cool.
I like the Super Bowl. Good, evenly matched teams.
So maybe it's like one of these deals.
Maybe it will go into double overtime for the win.
Whoever wins this hairy asshole battle, right?
Right, we'll see.
Well, let's get into free hamburgers since we're talking about hairy assholes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You've got to have something for them burgers to come out of.
That's right.
Wendy has served up a little nostalgia and a lot of free cheeseburgers.
We were ordered this week to mark the 40th anniversary of their now iconic Where's the Beef ad.
And once again, what do we say, Rob?
If you don't know what we're talking about, Google it.
What a good ass.
And here's what it is.
I'll tell you in a nutshell if you are the youngster variety or maybe not so young.
This commercial was a long time ago.
Oh, God.
I love her.
Everybody's telling me I love her.
She was a beef chick. She was older lady, what?
Probably in her 70s maybe.
Yeah, yeah, I'm a death 70s.
Old white hair and glasses, granny glasses.
And she was at like a McDonald's like establishment.
And they bring her out a burger and she looks at it and she goes, where's the beef?
Well, where's the beef?
And that was a big catchphrase that Wendy used for years.
Is they had square hamburgers that were big and that came outside of the bun to where the McDonald's.
And then even at that point, even Burger King's burgers were getting smaller and smaller and hearties and all the other ones that were big at the time.
You know, it was like becoming a trend, the shrink flation thing, even back then for hamburgers.
So Wendy's came out with this old lady.
It said, where's the beef? And we came out with a bigger burger and Dave Thomas, the inventor of Wendy's, he named it after his granddaughter.
He used to do a lot of the commercials too and he was great in it.
He was just this old kind of plump grandfather that told you about, you know, hey, quality is our recipe and we love you.
And it was really a great ad campaign and it really went well.
And it brought that, it brought Wendy's from like way down into what?
Number three, I think, I think it was time it was McDonald's, Burger King and Wendy's.
Now I think it might be McDonald's, Subways and Wendy's or McDonald's, Wendy's and Burger King.
I don't know, something like that.
So anyhow, where's the beef at?
The first, okay, the fast food chain is offering customers the answer that question might give away free beef.
Folks can pick up a free cheeseburger with any purchase that participated in Wendy's restaurants.
The only catch is that hungry customers have to use the company's app to order.
So grab your phone, pull up the app and get yourself some fries or classic vanilla frosty and pick up a Dave's single cheeseburger for free.
So I think we could all probably do that.
Don't you think we could do that, Rob?
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
Yeah, you see it's really cool because a lot of these places, fast food places, they want you to have their app.
Because the app is so easy to order on and they know eventually you're going to order more food.
So they offer free food to get you to get on their app and start using it regularly.
So I say, I say get as much free food as you can and then take the app off of your phone, right?
Yeah, definitely, definitely.
Alrighty, let's take our first break and we're going to come back with the hairy-ass-o Olympics Season 4 Part 2.
Is that correct, Rob?
Sounds good.
Alright, we'll talk to you guys in a minute.
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Hmm, let's see, if a worm could talk, would it be argumentive? I may never know.
Next up, Things Overheard in Hell.
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The apocalypse just happened. You don't know what to do. You don't know where to go. But we can tell you what you can eat.
Wild asparagus is plentiful and easy to find.
It can be stewed with garlic and onion, which is both wild, which can be easily found in the wild.
And a very tasty post-apocalypse food. You can make this into a delicious stew.
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If you enjoy Two Douchebags and Microphone, you'll definitely enjoy a shovel to the head.
Live from the historic river market in downtown Kansas City, Missouri, from the crystal blue waters of the Missouri River, it's Two Douchebags and a Microphone podcast.
And we are back, Two Douchebags and Microphone, on Mark.
And I'm Rob.
Alright, Rob, you have the list. So if you would like to break out some contestants, we should go from there.
Well, actually, since we're five to five.
Okay.
How about if I wrote them out the way we had them last time we did them.
Yours and mine.
I like that.
I have them separated.
Okay.
I'll take your first one, put against my first one, your second one, my second, and we'll do it that way. Fair enough?
Fair enough.
I can already see the first one is probably going to have to go to Topher.
Alright, what is it?
Cake Pan versus Bullwinkle.
Oh. Let's try to talk it out before we send it to Topher.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bullwinkle is a moose, man.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But Pigpen is the dirtiest thing ever. I mean, he's just got, I mean, so I guess there's really no actual proof that Pigpen is hairy. He's just got a lot of dirt on him.
So, in all honesty, probably Bullwinkle should win that.
That's what I looked at. That's why I brought him in, dude. He's a moose.
Yeah, yeah. Well, I got a guy for him that I'm going to break out my wild card next one around, and I'm going to get Bullwinkle with my guy.
He's been waiting in the shadows long enough. He is just dying to get out and win something.
So, that will be next one.
Alright.
Your Duluth Trading Guy.
He's my pride and joy.
Versus my Burt Reynolds.
Okay, the Duluth Trading Guy is the guy on the Duluth Trading commercials. The cartoon guy, the sketch guy that's like Harry in his underwear keeps compressing him and making him not be able to. Yeah.
So, that's the guy that we're talking about.
Cartoon character.
Yes, yep. He's more, he's kind of like sketch art kind of cartoon character. So, anyhow, so you guys know what I'm talking about.
Against Burt Reynolds.
I'm partial to my guy, Rob. I'm sorry. I think that the Duluth Trading Guy is solid.
Rest in peace, Burt.
Burt, thank you. Thank you for contributing. You may go back to your eternal slumber. I hope you have a great sleep.
Alrighty, next up.
Oh, man, they still be a hard one.
Uh oh.
Now, actually, I'm going to take number, or this number three and I'm going to make it number five.
I'm going to say that for last.
I trust your judgment, Rob.
Okay, next up we have Chris Stapleton versus Jim DePile.
Uncle Jesse.
Uncle Jesse off of Dukes of Hazzard and what do we always say, Rob? If you don't know who he is, Google it.
Look him up.
Um, okay. I'm going to go with Chris Stapleton because he's much younger.
I think that when you get older like Tucker mentioned before.
That's where I was going.
That's where I was going to go. I agree.
Yeah. So Chris Stapleton.
We love Uncle Jesse.
And Uncle Jesse, thank you for partaking in our little.
And the only reason why he came in is, you know, I love that show.
Well, I think we all love it.
I wish I could watch reruns. You can't find reruns.
I know.
Anyway, we're not going there. That gets political.
Oh, is that why the shows aren't showing? I didn't know.
I think. It had something to do with the General Lee and the Confederate flag.
And yeah.
After Mock overrode everything in those Daisy Dukes.
I'll tell you what. Let me look. Let me do some research on that. I'm thinking that's what they had to do with.
Since they did away with the Confederate flag, they're trying to do away with it.
Oh, and the General Lee.
They canceled the show on pretty much every TV station.
Well, you can get it on demand. You can get it on demand if you want.
And any streaming service should have it in there.
Really?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure you can. You know what? I'll look it up. I have three or four streaming services.
I know you could get the movies. I don't know about the original shows though.
You might even try YouTube.
You know what? Give me something to do.
Yeah. I'll bet you anything. You can find the shows if you really want to.
So, okay. So, Chris Stapleton gets it.
Yep.
Denver Pile. Thank you for contributing to our show. You may go back to your eternal sleep. We appreciate it very much.
Okay. Next up.
Next up.
David Letterman. After his show.
Yeah. Not before. After.
Not before. After the show. I may know that.
That's good.
Versus Mark Wuffalo.
Wow. This one I'm having trouble with because I like both candidates. They're very solid.
That might go to Topher.
You got a read on this? You got a feeling?
I'm as into David.
Okay. The only thing he gets me is...
I'm editing.
Well, how old is Mark Wuffalo?
I don't know. Probably in his 40s, maybe 50s.
And David Letterman's in his 70s.
Look what he did with that hair that quick.
Ah, that's true.
Okay.
You're right. He obviously has a lot of hair to work with. So, I'm going to say...
And also, he's a scruffy old man now. He don't give a shit. You're right.
David Letterman, it is.
And is this the one coming up that's tough?
Yeah.
Okay. I can't wait. I love the way you said that. It's going to be at that point.
Yeah.
Okay. Your Don Stark from that 70s show...
That would be Donna's dad.
...which is Bob, which is Donna's dad, versus my...
...Zack Galifianakis.
Okay. I did take a look at that last time in the pictures, side by side, and I think Zack G. takes it all the way.
That guy's got hair in his nose. He's got hair in his ears. He's got hair on his fucking eyeballs.
I think I'm going to have to go with Zack G., man.
But I don't know. What do you think?
I got to agree. Even though I love Don Stark.
We can bring him back, remember? We have same toys.
He's great. Yes.
You can bring him back, or I will. Someone will bring him back. The blue trading guy I said he...
Yeah, one of us will. Don Stark is a good runner.
He is solid. And also, he's just a funny, cool guy, too.
Yeah. Okay. That sounds good with me. I mean, yeah, we can bring him back.
Okay. That brought us down. You three, me two.
Okay. But you also have ripped the band down.
I'm happy thinking about my wild cards.
Okay. Do you want to introduce our wild cards right now?
No, no. I don't have one yet. I must come up with one, dude.
Okay. I've got a wild card that I just cannot wait.
This is one I've had four seasons now that I keep mentioning.
Wait a second. Wait a second.
Oh. What?
I'm not using a wild card.
I'm going to use my save card.
Okay. Oh, no.
I'm bringing Mark Ruffalo back in.
Alrighty. He deserves it. Alright. Cool.
Alright. Well, while we're here, let me go ahead and introduce my wild card.
Then it will be even, right?
No, we're even now.
Oh, we're even now? Okay. Wild card will come next time then.
Okay. We'll both bring out our wild cards next time.
Okay. That way we can put them against each other.
Alright. Sounds good to me.
Actually, that would work out good because we're three and three, it would come out weird.
We've got to have four and four. Alright. Four and four.
Yes. And also you have the band right now. That's Three Dog Nine.
Yeah. And thank you to our guys.
That's because I took Chris Stapleton.
Against our other band winners and then we'll eventually have a whole thing.
Yeah. And Chris Stapleton, I do not consider a band so he's in the regular hunt is what it is.
Is because. Yeah. No, no. He's individual.
Yeah. He's individual because he is an individual singer and player.
He's not in a band. He's just Chris Stapleton.
So he would go against them in case anyone's like, well, Chris Stapleton's into music.
We don't consider him a band. We consider him a musician.
Therefore he gets regular treatment on the Harry Asshole Olympics.
So, but while we're on bands, I got some interesting news here, Rob.
You a big Beatles fan like I am?
Yeah. Yeah. The older I get, the more I get into it.
I mean, I've always liked the Beatles. But the older I get, the more I get into it. Yeah.
The Beatles were responsible for some of the, to me, some of the life changing songs, epic songs to me that I just thought were, you know, like Let It Be, Hey Jude.
Oh, dude. Yeah. That Let It Be was over the top. I have always thought that.
I mean, even Sergeant Pepper. Yeah.
I mean, they just, they evolved right in front of everybody's eyes. Of course, I wasn't there. I was too young.
I didn't see him grow up. By the time I was starting to get older, they were already broke up.
And one of the first things I remember when I was younger is John Lennon getting murdered out in front of his apartment in New York.
That was really, really crazy. I couldn't believe that that would happen.
So by the time I came along, you know, they were like hand-me-downs, you know, like people go, Hey, yeah, the Beatles, man, they're fucking great.
So anyhow, I've been into the Beatles for quite a while now. Like I said, I didn't experience it, but I got him secondhand and I still have a huge love for them and a lot of their solo careers too.
Particularly Paul McCartney is great, but he's not one of my favorite solos.
To me, there was John Lennon and George Harrison had the two best solo careers with the best songs to me.
Yes. And then, you know, other people can like Paul McCartney. That's fine. He's great. All that.
So, but okay. This out of New York. The Beatles are getting the big screen biopic treatment in not just one film, but a fab four of movies that will give each band member their own spotlight.
All of which are going to be directed by Sam Mendes. Doesn't that sound great?
Each one of them are going to have their own film and their own spotlight on because they were all such individual characters with their own personality and their own music and their own style.
I think this is a perfect way to do it.
So for the first time, the Beatles long among the stingiest rights granders are given full life and music rights to a movie project.
Sony Pictures announced Monday a deal that may dwarf all music biopics that have come before it with the stories of Paul McCartney, John Lennon, George Harrison, and Ringo Starr spread out over a quartet of films.
Student tracking. Oh, okay. You know what? This went into another one. And this is something that, you know what?
I was going to say this. Forget what I just said. I was going to say that article for later. I forgot to separate it from the rest.
Okay. McCartney, Starr and the families of John Lennon and George Harrison have all signed off on the project through the band's Apple Corps Limited.
Sony Music Publishing controls the rights to the majority of the Beatles songs.
I'm honored to be telling the story of the greatest rock band of all time and excited to challenge the notion of what constitutes a trip to the movies.
Mendes said in the statement, he would be a perfect person to produce it anyhow.
Each film would be from the perspective of a Beatle.
And then what I was going to get into, you got into it briefly the other day.
The tracking of Taylor Swift's submissions.
Yes.
I have almost all of the information right here.
But the article was right below the article I was reading.
But when I printed it out, you know how sometimes they'll gumble things and move them up.
It's right here, but it isn't complete yet. So I'm not going to tell it yet.
But all I got to say is, if I ever hear one word from her about anything about being green, I'm going to flip out.
And I'm not a hater. I think she's fine.
Yeah.
I think it's really hypocritical.
Let me do some looking here because I have an article about that.
Go ahead.
I got to do some more. I have another. Oh yeah, she's looking for legal action.
I don't know how she can do that.
I have a few articles about it.
We can just go into talking about it.
Well, okay. There was this thing called the Freedom of Information Act.
And I believe it was passed during the Bill Clinton era.
I believe that anything that can be public information such as that, you have legal rights to.
And you also have legal rights to broadcast it and talk about it.
So I don't know what kind of recourse she could have.
Which gives us right to talk about it.
Yeah. And all this is allegedly. We've not been there doing all of this.
This is what we read. And if it's wrong, we're sorry. But we aren't two douchebags in a microphone.
So, anyhow, go ahead. Go ahead, Rob.
Okay. Okay. Right here, Rob. CNN celebrities.
Attorneys for total slip are threatening legal action against a Florida college student who tracks the private jets of celebrities and public figures including Swift.
Okay. And I had another story here.
Well, right after he did that, she sold one of her planes.
Yes. To the Kansas City based company. Yeah.
Yeah. So, yeah.
Well, why are you suing your plane or selling your plane and going to sue this dude?
Exactly. Yeah.
Come on. You've already been ranked.
I've already done a segment about that.
She was ranked, well, the last year or two for the highest emissions.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Well, like I said, I don't know what kind of legal recourse she could do, but I don't see how she could.
I mean, I imagine. I imagine.
I think. I don't know either.
Okay. Here's what normally happens, Rob. And you probably know this already.
But, okay. What people that have that much money do if they want something stopped is they quite frankly just sue you to death.
They're never going to get anything from you, but they run you through the courts and run you through the courts and run you through the courts and make you pay for all this legal stuff, make you pay for all this legal stuff until you finally just cease to exist on that level.
You're just like, man, I can't do it. Because they have more money than you do.
Angel tactic.
Yeah. Happens all the time.
So, anyhow, okay. Was there any more to that article or is that it?
Oh, no. Actually, I just covered like two different articles right there.
Oh, okay. All right.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's something I've been meaning to bring up.
You brought it up on a smaller scale on the last podcast. But, anyhow, I got this. I got most of the stats, but there's some other stuff that I want to read and I want to make sure they're correct before I get to them.
Anyhow, that was that article that almost read that was jumbled in the article I was reading about the Beatles.
So, anyhow, I think anyone that's a Beatles fan is probably pretty excited that they're coming out with four biopics that are going to be from the Beatles perspective. I think that's fantastic. Great producer.
Should be real treat for people like me that love them and probably even Rob too because I think Rob liked them enough to watch that, didn't you?
Yes. Yes.
Cool. All righty. Let's take our second break. When we come back, I got some odd facts. Does that sound good?
Oh, we had them in a while.
I know. I know.
As a matter of fact, I may join in with you. I have some saved up.
That sounds great. All right. Odd facts from Mark and Rob.
We'll see what happens.
Sounds good to me, Rob. All right. We'll be right back.
No bat light here. These idiots just show up and hope for the best.
Remember to bleach your Bluetooth after every show.
Next up, things overheard in hell.
Hurry up. Kim Jong Un is playing Santa at the mall again this year. Yay.
Break shit house energy drink. That's right. Break shit house energy drink. Make men feel a girl.
You want to fuck shit up? Run a full scum across America? Break shit houses or you?
Please enjoy break shit house energy drink responsibly. It's not readily available anywhere because of liability issues.
Two ass bags and a box of Cheez-Its will be right back.
Hey fellas, remember to wipe away from the twins. Stay fresh ideas from the douche bags.
And we are back. Two douche bags and a microphone. I'm Mark.
And I'm Rob.
All right. Well, like promised, we got some odd facts and I guess Rob's going to jump in too.
Now the question is, Rob, do you want to go first or do you want me to go first?
Go for it, my friend. It was your idea.
Okay. All right. Did you know that every day 20 banks are robbed and the average take is $2,500?
No, I didn't.
I find that surprising that the average take is only $2,500.
Because if you think about it, I mean, robbing a bank is a big fucking deal, right? You're talking about present time.
Why do you think it's only $2,500? Do you think that by all the different systems, you know, oh, I got to go get in the vault.
I got to push this. I got to push that. People just don't have the fortitude to wait it out and they just run with the money they got from the till maybe?
That very well could be. Well, with police response these days, a lot quicker than it used to be.
Yeah, that's true. You probably have a very limited time to get whatever you can.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's going to be a major standoff if you go to the vault.
Yeah, you're right. Yeah, you're right. That's it right there. They made it.
We're not back in the Jesse James days.
You're right. Good point. All right.
Did you know that there are more than 10 million bricks in the Empire State Building?
Wow. Yeah, I know.
The funny thing is, is I was up close in the Empire State Building. I almost went in it, but I didn't have enough time when I was up there working.
And I didn't even notice there were bricks in it. Interesting.
I would not have thought it was a brick building at all.
I wonder if it's all indoors. Like it's all, I don't know. Oh well, it doesn't matter.
Did you know that the Pittsburgh Penguins made Mr. Rogers an honorary captain in 1991?
Somehow I can see that. I think that's awesome.
No, I think it's awesome too. Yeah, he has fun out there too. Yeah, I can tie that together.
Yeah, that'd be cool.
All right. Did you know that peanuts are not nuts? They grow in the ground. So they are lagoons. Lagoons. Lagoons. No, no, no. Hang on. What's that?
I can't see that word. Lagoons. L-A-G-U-M-E-S. So I'll go over this again.
I heard that. I heard that.
Okay. I wonder how come they're always in the nuts section.
Because they're called peanuts.
Yeah. And also, no one would ever go to the lagoons section, would they?
No. There you go.
All righty. Next one. According to many astronauts, space does indeed have a smell.
Many spacewalkers describe space as smelling like seared steak or hot metal.
Huh. Interesting.
Yeah, I don't know what. Yeah, that's interesting.
Yeah. Yeah. Did you know that? Yeah, I got one too. If I'd bother mentioning it.
Okay. Sea lions have the ability to move their bodies to the rhythm of an external beat.
And I've actually seen this done. Because when we're on our Alaskan cruise, we took a sea lion whale tour.
And they started playing music. And the sea lions will flap and beat to it. It's great. They like dance.
I can see that. They're very playful too. You would not know how playful they are. I know they show them on TV and all that stuff.
But they're much more playful in person. And they screw with each other like one of them had their tail hanging over the side of the buoy.
And another one came up and kept like nibbling on his tail and freaking the other one out. It was really cool.
They got a lot of personality. They're very cool.
Do you know that three presidents, all founding fathers, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson and James Monroe died on July 4th?
Wow. Yeah, I didn't know that. I did not either.
That is my strange facts. So Rob, we look at you. Okay, well, yeah, I got a few here for you.
I didn't get a whole lot of them because sometimes I think we could go, you know, I think, you know what I mean, there's got to be a limit on it.
You got some too. So I think we'll be just fine. Dude, I think I got a whole show saved up.
Well, do as many as you see fit. I'm just going to do a few here. Okay.
There are enough restaurants in New York City for one person to eat out every night for 54 years and never visit the same place twice.
That's a lot of restaurants. Yeah, I could see that. I could see that.
I could too. Did you know that sunflowers are not just pretty faces?
They're often planted to help clean up contaminated soil.
Sunflowers are known as, well, you're going to have to look that one up, people.
Okay.
Factor, metatars, that's about as close as I get.
Meaning they can absorb and accumulate heavy metals and toxins from the soil.
Effectively detoxing it.
These cheerful flowers not only brighten up gardens, but also contribute to environmental cleanup efforts.
Wow. Yeah, see I didn't know that.
Okay.
There was a 2000 year old seed that was discovered in 1963 inside an ancient jar in Israel that was planted in 2005.
And a tree that had been extinct for over 1800 years sprouted.
Okay.
Yeah, actually I find that pretty cool, dude.
Yeah, I do too.
I love air. I love air.
That's cool. I would agree.
Okay, and here's my final one.
Okay.
When Robert Fowler, professor of oceanography, announced a mission to find the Titanic, it was a cover story for a classified mission to search for lost nuclear submarines.
They finished before they were due back, so the team spent the extra time looking for the Titanic and actually found it.
Really?
Yep.
Very cool.
Alright, good Rob, thank you.
You're welcome.
Alright, I've got an interesting story here.
Rob, do you remember Deshaun Jackson?
He played for the Chiefs briefly, he played for Andy Reid over in Philadelphia.
Yeah.
Yeah, good wide receiver, somewhat of a running back, just a really good player.
So, Deshaun Jackson wants full custody of his kids, says ex Kayla Phillips is brainwashed.
Deshaun Jackson is filed for sole custody of his sons, claiming his ex Kayla Phillips has abandoned their children.
In documents obtained by The Blast, the formal NFL star alleges that Phillips only saw their kids twice in 2023.
Adding to the complexity of the situation, Deshaun claims that Kayla has become a member of a religious group called The Most High, and is dating a man with cult-like behavior.
She appears to be brainwashed by the doctrine of The Most High, Jackson said, adding that she is living a carefree life that does not include the children.
So, he has filed for custody of them and to bring them back to Los Angeles, and I believe she is in Florida.
Oh, damn.
Yeah, I know. Interesting stuff, huh?
Yeah.
Wow, yeah. Well, I feel bad for them, that sucks. Especially kids that their mom's not around, that sucks.
So, I hope she gets better, whatever the hell, I hope she starts becoming a part of her kids' life, because they're going to need her.
Yes, I do too.
Alright. Do you know that men are using AI tools like chat, GPT, to improve their dating lives?
Why not?
You said it perfectly, why not? You've got these tools here that will help you out, hell yeah.
As a result, men were found to feel more confident in their dating and conversation skills.
I got a better idea. Get out and about, meet real people.
Yeah, yeah, I would agree with that, but I guess...
And this comes from a single person.
Rob, I would agree with you though, if I was single I would be out and about if I was looking.
I would be out and about looking, you know, I wouldn't be online trying to find somebody, because quite frankly, I don't think I trust anybody online.
Yeah, I've been there and done that, dude. Been there and done that.
It sounds like shit to me, it just sounds like bullshit, but anyhow.
Well, no, I have an ex-wife. I'm not online.
Oh, alright, there are exceptions.
Yeah, divorce, yeah.
Oh, well, you gave it a try, right?
Yeah, what I had to.
Okay, there you go. Online dating can be tough, but AI might be making it a little bit easier, a new study suggests.
Researchers at Attraction Truth, an AI dating coach, surveyed 1,371 men. I wonder why it's 1,371, it's an odd number to be, I don't know, surveying, but okay.
Men across the sexuality spectrum to say if they're using AI to enhance their dating profiles.
The most popular app used by the group was Tinder, followed by Bumble and Hinge.
The survey found that 20% of its respondents, roughly 274 men between the ages of 25 and 35, are using AI tools like OpenAI Chat GPT and general bios for their dating profiles and craft-tailored and captivating messages that resonated on their preferred matches.
Of the men who applied AI to their profiles, 37% reported feeling more confident with the opposite sex and 24% said they noticed improvements in their messaging skills.
By employing AI to initiate and manage conversations on dating apps, users can experience more positive outcomes and enhance interaction quality, Salvador Demadia, the co-founder of Attraction Truth told Insider in an email.
One of the surveys responded asked the Chat GPT version of Chat GPT to write a short dating app bio for Bumble that is funny but to the point.
According to screenshots from Attraction Truth Insider review, the user noted that he is Italian and wanted the bio that includes something with pasta food and a clear call to action.
And is personalized for someone who loves dancing, who prefers dating over chatting endlessly, and is interested to actually connecting with a person.
So this is what it came up with.
If I can turn this around.
Alright, the Chatbot came up with a short bio that includes phrases like, trust me my pasta game is strong, with the Italian flag and red wine emojis in each line.
So to me, I thought that was cheesy as hell.
But I guess they liked it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, and I knew it was going there, that's why I just kept going.
I was like, yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and get to it.
That's all the better it came up with?
Yes.
I say, if you can come up with better.
And how much money has been put into that technology?
Too much.
Exactly.
If you can't come up with better taglines and pick up lines than that, forget it.
You don't need the day.
You need to work on yourself.
Right?
Oh, definitely, definitely.
Rob, you got a story you want to get to?
Yeah, yeah, I got one here.
Thorie's accident discovers a submarine containing four tons of cocaine while searching for missing fishermen.
Wow.
Yeah, a submarine filled with four thousand kilograms, approximately four and a half tons of cocaine, impiled by four criminals, was discovered off the Pacific coast of Columbia.
Officials conducting a search mission for two missing fishermen stumbled upon a listed submarine craft on Wednesday dubbed the Narcosub.
The underwater vehicle was intercepted by the Colombian Navy and Air Force, as well as neighboring Ecuador.
With this seizure, the entry of more than $137 million into drug trafficking organizations was prevented, as well as the marketing of more than 10 million doses on the street of the world.
Cool.
Dude, that's a lot of cocaine.
Yeah, yes it is.
Wow.
And honestly, I for one am glad to get out of the street.
I am too.
I never liked cocaine.
It didn't do nothing for me.
I always told people that did it around me, I'm like, when I was a little bit older and I'd be at a party or something, I'd go, are you kidding?
Have you seen the headlines?
How many fat people in their mid-40s fucking die from cocaine overdoses?
All of them.
Get that shit away from me.
I was never a good type anyhow.
Back in our 20s and shit when I tried it, it was numb my throat, my nose, that was all it did for me.
To me that sounds like hell.
What the fuck, man?
I spent that much money for this?
I would be feeling ripped off, honestly.
Oh no, anytime I ever tried it, it didn't do shit for me.
So I quit trying it.
Well that's a good thing.
You don't try it until you eventually love it.
It didn't take me long.
That's cool.
I've got a little story here that has some new words.
There's 300 new words that were brought to actually the Webster Dictionary.
But I'm not going to do all 300 of them.
I'm just going to bring you a little sample size.
Do we have enough time tonight for 300?
No, I don't think we do.
Yeah, I don't think we do either.
So I'm going to bring you some highlights of it.
And I'm going to periodically go through more of them because like I said, there's 300 new words which really surprise me.
300 new words in one year?
So, okay.
So one is called MID.
M-I-D.
Adjective, mediocre, unimpressive, or disappointing.
And these are the youngsters that are doing these words.
This isn't X-ers and it's definitely not boomers that are coming up with this.
We already got our words, you know.
So they have their words here.
The Ick is the next one.
And it's a noun and it's a sudden feeling of disgust or dislike, often in response to the actions of another person.
The phrase popular in dating culture and in TikTok is thought to trace back to the late 1990s TV show, Ally McBeal.
The Ick is also used as an informal term of an illness, especially a cold or a flu.
Now I've heard it used as that before, Ick.
It's like, oh, I got the ick or the crud.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I've heard it like that before, but I've never heard it as ick as in like describing like a situation or something like that.
So basically it looks to me like the Ick, they kind of took a word that was already being used and made it a more well-rounded, all-purpose word.
Does that sound about right?
Yeah.
Okay.
Next one, cheat code.
Like cheating on something?
Cheat code.
Noun.
Employ a technique that bypasses traditional methods or rules in order to improve oneself or one's success.
The more recent sense of the term is an extension of its use in the context of video games in which it refers to a hidden command code, et cetera.
Use to gain an advantage such as by advancing levels or enhancing a character's strength.
I used to do that all the time in Diablo.
But.
I'm not a gamer.
Okay.
I can't remember what we, I think we called it a cheat code too.
I can't believe this is coming back around.
I pretty much quit playing video games after Atari.
Oh, okay.
I did get into a little bit of PlayStation 1.
Okay.
Jet Moto was awesome.
Anyway.
Cool.
I'm not arguing with you.
But yeah, video games, yeah.
Now, you put me in an arcade, it's a different story.
Rob, when you make it over here, you're going to love my game.
I've got a stand up game from the 80s.
It's the actual, it was the Midway World War II game was the original game.
Oh, dude.
Well, it's been gutted and it has 230 of the original games like Galaxy, Galaxian, Pac-Man, Galaga.
We ain't going to get no podcasts and.
Scramble, Dig Dug.
All of those things.
Centipede, Pac-Man, Ms. Pac-Man, Pac-Man Plus, Pac-Man Junior.
All of those.
And what the guy did was he lived in Belton.
His name was Brett.
He was an interesting guy.
He was kind of a nerdy guy and I haven't been able to find him for a while now.
So I think he might have moved or just quit doing it.
But he went around and bought up all these video games.
Probably I would say in the 90s when they started disappearing, right?
Or maybe he found them at auctions or salvage or something.
I don't know.
Yeah, that very well could be too.
Okay. He had a basement full of these things.
He even had some sit down ones too.
So what he did was he got these discs that were loaded with the classic arcade games.
The exact same ones.
And he would take out the disc that was in there and he would put the disc full of the classic games.
And then my game that I bought has one original joystick and one new improvised joystick.
The original joystick is the one that I use because that's the one I'm used to.
It's calibrated like I remember in the 80s.
And anyhow, he had a whole bunch of them and he was selling them.
And I actually helped him come up with a little ad campaign because he really didn't...
He was like, I don't know how to advertise these things.
And I said, you know, well I said the reason I'm here is because nostalgia.
I love this stuff.
I said what you got to do is you got to hit nostalgia wise.
And say something like, remember going to the Fun Factory when you were young?
Remember going there and getting your ass kicked by Pac-Man or getting your ass kicked by Galiot?
I forgot exactly how I was worded.
Imagine doing that at your home now for a minimal price to have your own game and then pictures on it.
And I spoke with him after that and he said it actually did really good.
There's a pickup in sales.
And anyhow, he might have moved.
I don't know, but he's not there anymore.
I lost his number.
But anyhow, I have one of these games and I hope it doesn't go bad because if it goes bad I don't know what I'm going to do.
Because I don't know how to fix it.
So anyhow, but you got to come over here and play it.
So...
Yeah, we'll have some good times.
Oh, it's a boring night, raining, I don't know, cold.
Turn that thing on and just start ripping on some Pac-Man or Galigan.
I mean it's just great.
Fun times.
And no quarters.
You don't have to come up with 3,000 quarters.
Oh, awesome.
Because I use all my quarters for laundry now.
Okay, well you can still use it for laundry because this game is free.
Now I thought about making it a quarter game and just seeing how much money I could save up and then like, I don't know,
buying the grandkids a bunch of stuff with it or something.
But I was like, yeah, you know.
Right, right, right.
I was like, nah, I don't want people to come over and pay for a video game.
I've got to think about it.
Alright, range anxiety is the next word.
It's a noun.
The apprehension or fear of an electric vehicle's battery will run out of power
before reaching one's intended destination or a charging station.
I am not even touching this one.
That is a framer.
Range anxiety.
Oh my God.
Oh, I love that.
Bravo, whoever came up with that.
And this hit the dictionary.
Yes, it is an actual word in Webster.
Whoever came up with that is genius.
Next one.
Skip lagging.
Like skipping and lagging.
Skip lagging.
It's a noun.
The practice of purchasing an air ticket for a flight with a layover at one's true destination,
getting off at the layover point and skipping the last leg of the flight.
A workaround to avoid paying a higher fare for a direct flight to one's destination.
The verb form is skip lag, a compound of skip to jump over a Passover and lag an instant of staying behind.
I didn't know you could do that.
I'm going to have to start looking.
So in other words.
I've never owned a plane.
I definitely would not know this.
Okay.
Man, I think that's a great idea.
I'm going to start looking into that.
Let's say I was going to Florida for a vacation.
And the flight ends up in, I don't know, Charlotte.
But the flight goes through Florida because it's cheaper.
You can see that.
Because they didn't get it filled up or whatever.
So they want to get as many people on that flight there.
And then the last leg, you go to Charlotte.
You never want to go to Charlotte.
You want to go to Florida.
So you book that because it's cheaper.
And then you just take off in Florida and you don't get on the plane to Charlotte.
See what I'm saying?
Or stay on the plane or whatever.
The only thing is how they do the luggage.
You'd have to take a carry-on bag.
See what I mean?
Because when you check in your luggage at KCI and your destination is supposed to be Charlotte,
you don't see that luggage again until Charlotte.
Right?
Right.
They must be talking about carrying carry-on bags because the other way it wouldn't work.
You'd be there and no luggage.
So.
The next one.
Pretty privilege.
It's a noun.
An unearthed and mostly unacknowledged societal advantage that a person has by fitting into a beauty standard of their culture.
Pretty privilege uses the same construction as white privilege in similar terms.
Okay.
Never heard that one before but okay.
Barbie core.
Noun.
An aesthetic or style feature of playful pink outfits, accessories, decor, etc.
Celebrating and modeled on the wardrobe of the Barbie doll.
We're likely still fully within the trend of using core to form names for niche aesthetics such as cottage core and norm core.
So.
Okay.
Slow fashion is the next one.
It's a noun.
A noun clothing producers and consumers that emphasizes eco-friendly well-made clothing, maintenance and repair of garments to extend their lifespan, and a general reduction of one's consumption of new clothing items.
The term is used in contrast with fast fashion.
The fast slow framing is perhaps the best known for its use and distinction between fast food and slow food.
But will likely continue to be applied in other contexts where there is interest in sustainable practices.
And finally, I think this is finally the last one.
Yes it is.
Bechdel test.
B-E-C-H-D-E-L.
Bechdel test.
Noun.
A test of gender stereotyping and inequality in fiction.
Having a number of variations and used especially with movies based on whether the work includes at least two fairly important female characters.
Who talk to each other about something besides a man.
The first recorded uses of the term bechdel test came from between 2005 and 2010.
But the concept was introduced by cartoonist Alison Betchel in 1985 comic strip.
And there is one more here.
And I, you know what, I'm not even going to get into it.
I don't know why they're using it now.
It's called prebiotic.
It's a substance containing dietary fiber that stimulates the growth tract to be a beneficial bacteria in the gastrointestinal tract.
That's been around forever and I don't know why that word won this way.
I mean shouldn't it have a...
Yeah, I don't either. I don't see that either.
I know there's probiotic but I thought there was also prebiotic so I don't know. Who knows?
Anyhow.
Yeah, I thought there was too.
Yeah, I think there was. I don't know why they put that in there.
And then there's another one. Tommy John surgery is talking to the unicollateral surgery.
But we already know that. Tommy John surgery has been going on for 30 years.
So I don't know why that was in there either.
But oh well. Anyhow. This will conclude our podcast.
Thank you everybody for joining.
I've got some more emails hopefully I'm going to get to this weekend.
Sound good?
Yes, sounds great. I love hearing from everybody. I love hearing from our assholes.
Yep, yep. And Opal is still listening.
Oh! Love you Opal!
And he did say his name. In the first one he said it's Jimmy but he told us in the first email.
Okay.
So I didn't remember.
Well hi Jimmy. Thank you.
Hi Jimmy. Thank you. And hi Opal. We love you. Thanks for listening.
Yes we do.
So anyhow that needed to be said because I actually got to that email last night.
It was the one next to the one, the last one that I downloaded.
And I was like oh shit I missed this one. So anyhow there you go.
Oh dude yeah that's been a good one to end on. But that's good. That's cool.
Well basically he said yeah my name's Jimmy. I gave that to you on the first one.
But you know you've forgotten it of course.
Right. Yeah, yeah.
But he still downloads it for his mom and actually I have a couple other people listen to it too in Dodge City.
Is it his mom?
No his grandma. I'm sorry.
His grandma? Yeah see I thought it was his grandma.
I misspoke. It's his grandma. His grandma, he's a grandson. And he downloads it for her.
And there's actually a couple other people listen to it as well in Dodge City. So thank you Dodge City.
Oh that is awesome. Thank you Dodge City.
So there's four people around Dodge City we know of that listen. So thank you.
Alrighty everybody have a good night.
Did you ever think it'd be like this Mark?
No, no not at all. And as a matter of fact we got to do this.
I did not either.
We got to do another state of the douchebags and go over our top markets and thank them soon.
Yes, yes we do.
Yeah, yep. And thank you Des Moines. Thank you and shit what's his name? The guy that's giving me all this shit.
He hasn't sent me anything new so maybe he's happy now. We've been sending out some podcasts.
So Blake. Blake. Where's Blake? Yeah Blake from Des Moines.
I didn't hear from you so I assume you're happy now.
And that doesn't mean clog up my email with a bunch of shit.
Okay. Anyhow thank you guys for listening. Have a great night.
Hey that's between you and Blake.
Oh he's a good guy. He just loves the show. He got a little frustrated.
Because I think he thought we quit it. I think he thought we quit the show but I guess he wasn't listening to it.
No, Mark we're on a week cruise.
I thought I talked about it enough to where people would go.
You did. Yeah we talked about it before.
The feeling I got was re-reading them all is he thought we quit.
Well you also mentioned we were going to try to get it up and going but it didn't work.
Oh that's right. He probably was under the assumption that we could get it going but we couldn't.
We tried several times and it just would logistically it would not work so anyhow.
Alright. And also we did a bonus podcast anyhow when you were sick.
We actually did two the next day so we're working hard for you.
So anyhow everybody have a good night.
Good night assholes.
Hey where did they go? Where are the douche bags?
Oh my god someone took a dump in the corner. Oh jeez.
I'm glad they're gone. Let's just hope they don't come back. Man that smells.