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Live from the historic river market in downtown Kansas City, Missouri, from the crystal blue

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waters of the Missouri River, it's Two Douchebags and a Microphone Podcast.

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Hey.

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Hey podcasting people.

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This is Topher.

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I've managed to slip away from my minders or handlers or whatever they call themselves.

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The Kale people have got me sequestered somewhere.

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I'm not sure they move me every couple of days.

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Anyway I'm supposed to be working in the greenhouse and I slipped out for a bit so I could try

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to do some gorilla recording.

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Oh, and the greenhouse, it's not where they grow the kale.

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That of course is artificial.

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The greenhouse is where the kale people make the food they eat because of course they don't

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even eat kale themselves.

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Anyways oh, I've learned that they now call themselves Piteka.

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Like Pita, only Piteka.

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People for the ethical treatment of kale.

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And my interrogators have informed me I'm facing 17 counts of crimes against kale.

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Apparently I'm denying kale the ability to fulfill its destiny as a kale plant.

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That destiny is of course to make you vomit.

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But my interrogators say they're looking into a few more counts.

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They call themselves interrogators but really they haven't even asked me any questions yet.

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But as long as I've got this recording and I can try to sneak it out, I learned some

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interesting things.

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One that is if you have a Google Pixel phone, your phone may fail to call 911.

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This has been a problem since 2021 and still no one can figure out why.

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It happens on all carriers all around the globe.

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The only common denominator is the Google Pixel phone.

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I can attest I had one of those that wouldn't call 911.

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Another interesting thing I learned, if you've been on more than one international flight

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or, oh hang on a second.

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I think one of their drones is overhead.

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I can hear a little beeping.

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Hang on, we're going to let the drone go by and then I can start again.

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If you've been on more than one international flight or three or more long distance flights

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to a coast, it's almost 100% certain you've flown with a drug mule.

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And that's an interesting thing to think about, you're sharing the plane with a drug mule.

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And on the subject of recreational drugs, almost all of recreational drugs are completely

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vegan.

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Isn't that interesting?

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Vegans may be onto something here.

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I guess the non-vegan one would be like licking a toad or something like that.

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My last thing I've got is, in the country of Vietnam, there are still 35 million unexploded

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land mines buried and 500,000 pounds of unexploded ordinance.

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That's a lot.

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But fortunately they're training rats to sniff out land mines.

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So that's not as cool.

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It's not so good if it's a dog.

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If a dog gets a land mine and it pops, then everyone's sad about the dog.

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We got plenty of rats.

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I better get back to the greenhouse or they're going to notice I'm gone.

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So I'll try to get another recording out when I can.

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Keep thinking of me.

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Bye.

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So I suspect everyone heard the Tofer bit.

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Yes, I did.

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It was so good to hear his voice.

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Yeah, I'm glad he's okay.

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But I would like us all to take a moment of silence and pray for Tofer.

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He is still being held by the Kale evildoers and we're still concerned, although he's fine.

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I mean, you all heard, you know, he's speaking, he's not hurt, he's not harmed, but he did

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uncover some things that's very important to know.

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They don't eat kale.

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They know it's a lie.

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They can't stand it.

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That's what he's saying.

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Yeah.

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I knew this all along.

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It was a joke that someone was trying to play and people bit.

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He was just, he thought that people are going to like throw this shit at him and scream

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and tell me he's an idiot and a fuckwad and all this stuff.

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But then these fucking man bum wearing little sissies were like, oh my gosh, this stuff

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tastes so good.

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I want to go hug a tree and eat some kale.

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Thank you.

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Thank you.

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And the creator of kale was like, what?

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This is not what I meant.

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So then when, you know, then when these brain dead fools come around and start loving kale,

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he got out.

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He's like, I want nothing to do with this shit.

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So anyhow, you know, they're blaming, they're blaming Topher for all their, you know, idiocy.

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They're saying that he has crimes against him and stuff, but they've, they've never

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presented any type of accusations or any type of charges.

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So I'm wondering just what they want to do with, with Topher.

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We're all worried.

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We're very concerned.

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We're glad that he's well and doing okay.

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He didn't say he didn't sound in distress.

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He sounded okay, but we're hoping we can get Topher back here soon.

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So everybody, we want you to stick with us and hashtag Topher strong, hashtag Topher

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strong.

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Everybody hang in there.

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I'm going to make bumper stickers for everybody.

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Oh, good.

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Good.

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Good.

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So we did it.

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After I heard that I got thinking, I hadn't heard from my cousin Henry in a week or two.

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So I called my aunt Winnie out West Virginia and she, she told me I was stupid.

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Why?

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It's bow season for deer.

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Oh, okay.

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That's probably why he just gave up looking for Topher.

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He said he's not going to get a hold of him.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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That's why I ain't heard nothing.

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And they're moving.

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Oh yeah.

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They're definitely going to be lost when they get back on the trail.

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Well, I don't think Topher told where he's at because I don't think he knows where he's

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at, but as soon as he gets his bearings.

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He don't know where he's at.

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Oh, he did say that.

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Okay.

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About every two, three days.

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Those evil doers are going to get it.

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Yep.

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They are going to get it.

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So anyhow, that was very good to hear from Topher, wasn't it?

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Yes, it was.

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Hi everybody.

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This is Two Douchebags and Microphone.

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I am Mark.

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And I am Rob.

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All right.

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So everybody, thanks for joining us.

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Coming up on this show, I don't know.

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You know what?

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I think it will be the show before, but Topher was able to break free from the evil doers

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of the kale industry that kidnapped him.

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Oh, right on.

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Yes.

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He has a few minutes where he's speaking to us frankly from his heart.

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And I want everyone to listen to it and don't ignore his plea.

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He is forced to be around kale and around people that love kale.

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Or they say they do, but they don't.

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It's actually an evil international plot to get people to eat stuff that no one else likes.

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And it's working.

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People swear up and down they like kale, but we know it's a lie.

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The whole thing is it's been a ruse from day one.

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The guy that invented it was joking around and then people started acting like they liked

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it.

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And he's like, what?

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I was just joking around.

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No one's supposed to really like this shit.

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So the people that even say they like kale, they don't like kale.

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They have been, they're sheep.

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They've been spoon fed this shit to eat this garbage and the people are laughing at them.

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So anyhow, I'm not sure if it's this one.

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It could be the one before, but on one of these, maybe, you know what?

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I'm going to put them in both.

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I'm going to put them in both podcasts.

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So it'll be the one before and this one.

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So there you go.

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All right.

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So yeah.

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So you want to get on a roll?

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I'll do some more stupid shit.

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How's that?

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But anyhow, having Topher on is not, yeah.

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Having Topher on is not stupid shit.

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Having Topher on is fantastic because.

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Yes, it is.

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Yep.

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So anyhow, and like I said, if you ever wants to come back and do the podcast, that's fantastic.

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Instead of four podcasts, we'll have fucking six or seven.

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You guys will never get rid of this.

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We'll have to up it to two hours a night.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Hey, you fuckers like that shit.

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Just when you thought you.

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We'll have all three of us here.

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Yeah.

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Hell yeah.

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We'll have our own variety show.

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I'm going to like juggle, but you can't tell because it's a podcast.

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Right.

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Yeah.

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So, you know, I could say I'm juggling and we could have like Rob and Topher going, oh

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my God, look at that.

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Now he's juggling fire and knives.

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And you would never know because you can't see me.

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But then again, maybe I am.

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We actually go live.

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Well, yeah, when we do that, then, you know, then I'll probably be like, well, I gave up

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juggling.

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My doctor told me to.

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So anyhow, coming up, we have some ass paddling.

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They really need to be delved out.

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They're really, really.

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I mean, these people have been screaming for ass paddling.

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And like I said, we have one a month because that's what the genie granted us.

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And so we have to abide by the genie's wishes.

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So but these people have been screaming and begging for us to spank their ass, give them

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an ass paddling.

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So we are doing this.

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So should we go ahead and lead off with some ass paddling, Rob?

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Yeah, let's do it.

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All right.

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OK.

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The people who don't know the story, I'm very disappointed in you because you haven't been

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listening to the podcast long enough.

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Topher and I were walking on the beach, not holding hands due to popular belief.

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And I don't care what Rob's getting ready to say.

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He did not see us holding hands.

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I tell you, I seriously doubt that.

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Yeah, I do not believe it.

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OK.

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I'm telling you we're not holding hands.

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Rob, they had to say something there.

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Because I know you and I would be.

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Well, of course.

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Well, I'd probably be spooning your ass with my hand or something.

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Yeah.

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Yeah, that could be two.

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So anyhow, anyhow, you got to give us a you got to give us a 38 special report in a little

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bit, too.

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Oh, I got it.

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But anyhow, we'll go ahead.

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OK, so we are sorry.

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My ADD is really bad tonight.

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So I apologize right now.

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I'm going to be ping ponging all over the place.

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So anyhow, we're walking along the beach and I'm bam stubbed my toe.

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I'm like, oh shit.

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Oh, fuck, that hurt.

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And I look down, it's a bottle.

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And me and Topher look at each other.

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Wow, that looks like a genie bottle.

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So we get the sand away from it.

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We open it up.

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All of a sudden, a genie comes out.

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And me and Topher are like, yeah, we get three wishes.

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He goes, no, no, no, no.

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That's not the deal, guys.

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You get one wish and one wish only.

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And that's it.

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I'm sorry.

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So this one wish, I suggest you use it wisely.

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So instead of saving the environment or ending hunger or all World War or famine or whatever,

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we chose to ass paddle people.

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So I told the genie, me and Topher said, oh, that's great.

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We want to be invisible so we can ass paddle people.

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The genie rolled his eyes.

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He goes, oh shit, a couple of losers.

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But you know what I have to do?

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What I have to do?

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I have to grant them this wish.

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So he very reluctantly granted us this wish.

253
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So once a month, we get to paddle people's ass because we're invisible.

254
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:20,340
One of us has to paddle and one of us holds them down because they can't see us.

255
00:13:20,340 --> 00:13:29,480
So anyhow, without any further ado, first off, the first ass paddling of this month

256
00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:35,080
goes to Congressman Bowman for accidentally pulling the fire alarm.

257
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,560
Did you hear the story on that, Rob?

258
00:13:37,560 --> 00:13:39,560
Yeah, I did.

259
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:40,560
Yeah, yeah.

260
00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:45,200
He had other plans, according to what I've read.

261
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:50,640
And he also wanted to make the Republicans look bad by not passing a budget and not shutting

262
00:13:50,640 --> 00:13:51,880
Congress down.

263
00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:56,460
So when they get ready to pass this budget, old dumb ass says he accidentally pulled the

264
00:13:56,460 --> 00:13:59,840
fire alarm, which people have shown.

265
00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:03,400
The fire alarm is way away from where he said he was doing.

266
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:05,320
He said he was trying to get in the secure area.

267
00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:07,760
Was that it?

268
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:08,760
He was trying to get in the secure area.

269
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:09,760
Yeah.

270
00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:15,240
He pulled the wrong whatever, but he accidentally pulled the fire alarm.

271
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,960
We all know that's bullshit.

272
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:20,680
And we all know that he didn't want to sit there and do the vote.

273
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:24,800
He probably had fucking dinner plans or some shit and he didn't think they're going to

274
00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:25,800
get anything done.

275
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,200
So he's going to go fuck you guys and leave.

276
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,200
And it didn't work.

277
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,480
So what does dumb ass do?

278
00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:32,720
He pulls the fire alarm and he should get in trouble.

279
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:36,880
And he should get in the same trouble as the looters and the rioters or not the looters,

280
00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:40,160
but the rioters, the people that or the demonstrators.

281
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:43,760
No, no, no, there's no such thing as rioters anymore in America.

282
00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:52,080
The demonstrators that did the January 6th demonstration that he has done the same thing.

283
00:14:52,080 --> 00:14:53,920
He is insinuated.

284
00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:59,480
He has instituted chaos in that building and it should be held fully accountable.

285
00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:02,980
And I expect the government to do so, although they won't.

286
00:15:02,980 --> 00:15:11,080
So anyhow, he, um, he gets the number one one and he deserves a number one ass paddling.

287
00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:17,800
So the next one is, um, geez, I, you know what?

288
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:21,360
I didn't do my research on this guy, so I'm going to leave him off, but he's going to

289
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:23,000
be on the next ass paddling.

290
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:29,400
There's a member of the Pentagon that is accused of being in a dog fighting ring, you know,

291
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:36,400
uh, Michael Vick and he gets an ass paddling too, but I, I had his name written down here

292
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:40,520
in my phone and I'm sorry, let's take a little bit longer than normal because all of this

293
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:45,120
is in my phone and I have to get to it and I never did print it out like I thought I

294
00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:48,120
did and I'm a little bit unprepared, so I apologize.

295
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:52,780
So he gets an ass paddling, but he will wait till next time because I'll have to actually

296
00:15:52,780 --> 00:15:55,680
give you his name.

297
00:15:55,680 --> 00:16:01,480
Next up, Aaron Rodgers for calling Travis Kelsey Mr. Pfizer when he just got done slap

298
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:05,160
assing with him on the fucking 50 yard line before.

299
00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:10,880
I think that is a bullshit thing to say when you're supposed to be someone's friend and

300
00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:13,360
everybody is titled to their own point of view.

301
00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:17,840
Like I said, I got the vaccination because I take care of my elderly mom.

302
00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:20,220
Anyone that doesn't like it can suck my dick.

303
00:16:20,220 --> 00:16:22,640
I did what I have to fucking do.

304
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,080
You don't have to get the Vax.

305
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,320
I don't care.

306
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:31,640
I'm not going to mother fuck you, but Aaron Rodgers, you stupid fucker, shut your mouth.

307
00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:33,960
Shut your mouth and obey the fucking man.

308
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:34,960
Okay?

309
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,040
No, not really.

310
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,360
Just shut your mouth.

311
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:42,240
So anyhow, like I said, I don't care if you get the Vax or not, but that was very low

312
00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:49,240
life of Aaron Rodgers and I think it speaks to maybe how come his karma went the way it

313
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:50,240
has, right?

314
00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:51,240
Yeah.

315
00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:52,240
Yeah.

316
00:16:52,240 --> 00:17:01,400
The next ass-paddling goes to TMZ for constantly reporting on Kelsey Swift sightings because

317
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:04,480
maybe 14 year old girls give a shit.

318
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:05,840
The rest of us don't.

319
00:17:05,840 --> 00:17:09,080
TMZ, we don't give a fuck if they're going out to dinner.

320
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,320
Leave us alone.

321
00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:12,600
Don't inundate us with this stuff.

322
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:13,600
They're everywhere.

323
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:14,600
They're everywhere.

324
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:18,320
Why don't you worry about the fucking war going on over in Israel right now?

325
00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:19,520
That's more pertinent.

326
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:24,040
That's what you should be worried about, not Travis Kelsey and fucking Taylor Swift.

327
00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:28,280
You should be worried about our dollar which is collapsing because they just fucking print

328
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:30,040
money out of their asshole.

329
00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:34,200
You should be worried about Ukraine and how they're bankrupt in the US and that fucking

330
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:38,560
little bastard over there in Russia knows it because we're fucking following this shit.

331
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,720
Oh yeah, we gotta go over there and follow them.

332
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:42,200
Well, why do we?

333
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:46,520
Anyhow, so before I get off here, I'm going to go ahead and move on.

334
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,520
Yeah, that might be a good idea.

335
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:53,360
Narcan, for saving Skids lives over and over.

336
00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:57,320
People that want to fucking die because their life isn't worth a shit and they know it and

337
00:17:57,320 --> 00:18:00,480
they're trapped and they're miserable.

338
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,360
Fucking don't give them Narcan.

339
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:03,360
They want to keep ODing?

340
00:18:03,360 --> 00:18:04,360
Let them go.

341
00:18:04,360 --> 00:18:05,360
Done.

342
00:18:05,360 --> 00:18:07,040
Experiment over.

343
00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:08,240
This one didn't work.

344
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:10,120
We got 500 other ones that might work.

345
00:18:10,120 --> 00:18:11,960
Leave them the fuck alone.

346
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,920
Let them choke in their vomit.

347
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:14,920
Fuck it.

348
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:20,000
They want to give Narcan so they can save them and throw them in jail and make money

349
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,000
on them.

350
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,040
Yeah, you know what, Rob?

351
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:24,040
You're right.

352
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:27,920
Yeah, let's put them in jail for profit.

353
00:18:27,920 --> 00:18:35,280
So anyhow, and then Narcan probably saved the Skid that killed the little girl in his

354
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,080
homeless camp.

355
00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:38,680
Did you read that story, Rob?

356
00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:40,680
No, I did not.

357
00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:41,680
Okay.

358
00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:46,560
Before getting too much into it, just Google it if you want to know who gets the ass paddling.

359
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:49,440
Yeah, the Skid that did that.

360
00:18:49,440 --> 00:19:00,600
Okay, so anyhow, all Bengals fans, and for obvious reasons, I mean Bengals fans could

361
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:02,240
not shut their fucking mouth.

362
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:05,600
Nelson, what are you getting from Bengals?

363
00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:06,600
Crickets.

364
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:12,360
I want to hear it now, one in three, Mr. Fucking nine points in three games.

365
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:13,680
Let's hear it now.

366
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:14,680
Let's hear it now.

367
00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:15,920
Come on, beat your chest.

368
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,120
Tell us how good you are.

369
00:19:18,120 --> 00:19:23,880
Next, Chicago and the bullshit signature bonds that has ruined that city.

370
00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:29,200
I mean, the city was already ruined, but these signature bonds, all they fucking do is let

371
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:32,400
criminals out because they sign their name and leave and then they go do the same fucking

372
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:33,840
thing.

373
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:38,200
That fucking idiot that runs that place over there, they said, could it get worse than

374
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:40,320
Lori Lightfoot?

375
00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,000
Now you know.

376
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:47,200
She was horrible and this guy's worse.

377
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:53,360
Next ass paddling, Kale for still being there.

378
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:57,560
And Topher's got something to say about that too.

379
00:19:57,560 --> 00:20:03,720
Next ass paddling, and they got an ass paddling for lying to us, McDonald's, for taking away

380
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:07,560
the McRib last year and swearing it off.

381
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:12,560
And McDonald's gets into the hall of fame.

382
00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:18,180
And the reason is because I called it, I can't remember, were you on the show yet or was

383
00:20:18,180 --> 00:20:20,120
Topher still on the show?

384
00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:26,920
You know what, it doesn't matter.

385
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:29,560
I think you were on the show already.

386
00:20:29,560 --> 00:20:36,040
In any, I called bullshit on McDonald's because I knew, I predicted exactly what was going

387
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:37,040
to happen.

388
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,600
There's going to be a groundswell, a grassroots effort.

389
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:41,720
Oh yeah, people are going to come out of the woodwork.

390
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:42,720
They're going to sign petitions.

391
00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,440
Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, oh my God.

392
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:47,600
And that's exactly what happened.

393
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:49,800
Uh huh, sure.

394
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:54,680
So the McRib is back, but only for a limited time and only for this time.

395
00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:55,960
You better get in there right now.

396
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:57,920
You may never see it again.

397
00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:58,920
Bullshit.

398
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:00,520
Only at selected stores.

399
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:03,040
Oh yeah, that's true too.

400
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:05,800
Because wherever there's like little more intelligent people, they probably don't even

401
00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:07,160
pull them out.

402
00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:08,680
Pig assholes ground.

403
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:16,200
So in my opinion, allegedly Motley Crue gets next ass paddling and they are in the hall

404
00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:20,960
of fame for putting out, this time for a little bit different reason, for putting out horrible

405
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:24,200
new music that's common and sterile.

406
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,160
Okay, okay.

407
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:34,120
Other than, Mike Mars, John Carrabbi, John Fyke.

408
00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:37,600
Yes, yeah those three do not get ass paddling.

409
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:39,600
Thank you, thank you for reminding me.

410
00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:42,600
They're another one of our Hall of Famers.

411
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:43,600
Yeah.

412
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:47,920
And I have no, except Mike Mars, John Carrabbi and John Fyke.

413
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,920
Yes, thank you Rob, thank you for identifying that.

414
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:56,040
Everyone else in Motley Crue is getting ass paddling and they are in the hall of fame,

415
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:59,840
but the reason they came back around is because this is for a different reason.

416
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:03,480
This is because they put out horrible new music that's common and sterile.

417
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:04,480
It's terrible.

418
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,480
I listen to both songs and it's like what?

419
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,480
Stuff is bullshit, man.

420
00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:15,400
It's run of the mill garbage that you hear on any FM outlet anywhere America USA.

421
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:16,680
And I'm talking about rock radio.

422
00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:23,760
I'm talking about adult, no no no, album oriented rock or album rock or whatever you call it.

423
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,920
You know, hard rock basically.

424
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:26,920
It's bullshit.

425
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:36,040
So next one, anyone who opposes Oceanfront Avenue in Miami being renamed Jimmy Buffett

426
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:45,000
Avenue because they are trying to rename Oceanfront Boulevard, Jimmy Buffett Boulevard and I'm

427
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:46,680
all for it.

428
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:51,840
I hope they, yeah, anyone that opposes it gets an ass paddling and then they don't even

429
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:52,840
get the hall of fame.

430
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:54,200
They get thrown out on their ass.

431
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:55,200
We don't want it.

432
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,200
We don't want it.

433
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:57,200
We don't want it.

434
00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:58,200
We don't want it.

435
00:22:58,200 --> 00:22:59,200
We don't want it.

436
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:00,200
We don't want it.

437
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:01,320
So anyone that opposes this, they get an ass paddling and I'm going to go ahead and make

438
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:02,320
an exception.

439
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:08,600
Most ass paddlings are like 15, 20 minutes because we tire, right?

440
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:13,220
This one we can do several ass paddlings and bring them back and ass paddle them again

441
00:23:13,220 --> 00:23:16,600
when we rest up a little bit.

442
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:20,000
And then when we're done wearing their, do what?

443
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:21,320
We can tag team them.

444
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:27,040
Yeah, yeah, then when we're done tag teaming them or whatever, then we don't want anything

445
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,040
to do with them anymore.

446
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:30,440
We just fucking, we banish them.

447
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:33,760
They disappear off of the world, our world.

448
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:41,440
And then next we have Kevin McCarthy for being the first speaker of the house ever removed.

449
00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:43,440
Yeah.

450
00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:45,440
Yeah.

451
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:47,440
Yep.

452
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:49,440
Yep.

453
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:51,120
Yep.

454
00:23:51,120 --> 00:23:52,120
That never happens.

455
00:23:52,120 --> 00:23:54,440
It's never happened ever.

456
00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:58,600
And you talk about a vote of unconfidence removing someone from there.

457
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:09,780
So anyhow, the next one, every talk show host, late night talk show host that doesn't want

458
00:24:09,780 --> 00:24:13,840
Trump to get speaker of the house because they're being stupid.

459
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:17,800
That would be the, that material would write itself.

460
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,060
I'm not saying pro con nothing.

461
00:24:20,060 --> 00:24:26,200
What I'm saying is, is any one of these like Jimmy Kimmel or, or, or they're at Colbert

462
00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:32,320
or any of those idiots, those unfunny fucking losers, any of those guys, any of those guys

463
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:34,140
that bash Trump regularly.

464
00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:38,820
And I'm not saying anything for against Trump, but they're, they write their whole things

465
00:24:38,820 --> 00:24:40,520
off of bashing him.

466
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:44,000
Everything, their whole diatron is off of bashing him.

467
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,120
I know I've tried to stomach it.

468
00:24:46,120 --> 00:24:47,120
Yeah.

469
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:51,320
So they're being very disingenuous or they say they don't want this to happen because

470
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:55,280
they know when their heart of hearts, this would be the best thing for them because they

471
00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:57,080
can't write their own material.

472
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:59,040
That materials just handed right to them.

473
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:00,040
Here you go.

474
00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:02,840
Sign sealed and delivered.

475
00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:10,940
So next one, little Joey burrow for grabbing the huge contract and falling on his face.

476
00:25:10,940 --> 00:25:15,780
And he is the last one.

477
00:25:15,780 --> 00:25:18,720
So anyhow, Joey burrow deep.

478
00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:19,720
Okay.

479
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:26,560
Joey burrow right now is just going to be a one timer, but if he continues to suck all

480
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:32,000
year and then have a followup suck year, he might go into the hall of fame.

481
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,000
Fair enough.

482
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,000
Alrighty.

483
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:36,000
Okay.

484
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:40,920
Let's take us a little break and we're going to come back with some probably very stupid

485
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:42,920
stuff like always.

486
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:51,080
A lot of podcasts just come from a can here at two douchebags and a microphone.

487
00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:58,680
We call our own podcasts.

488
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:01,960
Invisible ass paddling, new douche flavors and horrible pranks.

489
00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:08,400
The fuck is wrong with these guys?

490
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,320
All aware of the Amber alert, right?

491
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:13,960
Well, get rid of your disinfectants and rubber bed spreads kids.

492
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:16,920
It's the all new Amber herd alert system.

493
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:21,080
This fantastic early warning device helps one stay dry and rid of all those annoying

494
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:23,240
mattress invoices.

495
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:28,160
Simply hook up to child under six or psychopath and wait for the running water sound.

496
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:32,920
This clever machine has three distinct settings, babbling, ocean waves and roaring river for

497
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:38,880
those close call order today and get a free Cinnabon renews it cartridge.

498
00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:51,240
All right, everybody.

499
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:52,720
This is two douchebags and microphone.

500
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:53,720
I'm Mark.

501
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:54,720
I'm Rob.

502
00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:57,920
All right, Rob, you got anything you want to interject?

503
00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:58,920
We're talking about 38 special.

504
00:26:58,920 --> 00:26:59,920
Why don't you give us a...

505
00:26:59,920 --> 00:27:00,920
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

506
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:01,920
I'll get to that.

507
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:02,920
Get to that.

508
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:03,920
Okay.

509
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:06,040
First off, I just want to know one thing.

510
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,200
Did you sing So Caught Up In You, little girl?

511
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:11,680
You're the one that's got me down on my knees.

512
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:12,680
So Caught Up In You.

513
00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:13,680
Dude, I sang every song.

514
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:14,680
Okay.

515
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:15,680
All right.

516
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:16,680
Okay.

517
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:17,680
Go ahead.

518
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:24,680
It started out with the Kuwait Pointer band.

519
00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:25,680
Okay.

520
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:26,680
I'm not...

521
00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:27,680
Good band.

522
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:28,680
Okay, good.

523
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:29,680
Okay.

524
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:30,680
You can check them out on YouTube.

525
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:36,680
They're country with little rock.

526
00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:39,680
Yeah, it's good music.

527
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:41,680
Good music.

528
00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:42,680
Okay.

529
00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:44,360
I really enjoyed them.

530
00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:46,320
Well, that's a perfect band for that venue.

531
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:49,360
I mean, for who's playing or things like that.

532
00:27:49,360 --> 00:27:50,360
Yeah, they were.

533
00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:51,360
They fit in perfect.

534
00:27:51,360 --> 00:27:52,360
Good.

535
00:27:52,360 --> 00:27:57,720
I think the only way that concert could have got better if they would have had Molly Hatchet

536
00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:58,720
to them.

537
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:01,760
And 30 Naked Women blowing every guy there.

538
00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:03,120
Yeah, yeah.

539
00:28:03,120 --> 00:28:04,120
Okay.

540
00:28:04,120 --> 00:28:05,120
All right.

541
00:28:05,120 --> 00:28:06,120
Just had to have that.

542
00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:09,440
And then we came to Marshall Tucker band.

543
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:10,800
They always put on a great show.

544
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:12,680
I've seen them quite a few times.

545
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:13,680
It was awesome.

546
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:14,680
It was awesome.

547
00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:15,680
They have some awesome musicians.

548
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:21,800
Yeah, they are musician musicians on there.

549
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:22,800
They're so precise.

550
00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:23,800
Anyhow, go ahead.

551
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:32,400
The guy that plays their flute and saxophone, he was just rocking having a good time, man.

552
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:33,400
That's awesome.

553
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:34,400
They all work.

554
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:35,400
They all work.

555
00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:36,520
Aren't you glad they added them late?

556
00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:41,400
I mean, you know, the show was going to be awesome anyhow, because I've always loved

557
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:42,400
their special.

558
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:45,040
I never thought they really got their true due.

559
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:49,320
But I mean, adding Marshall Tucker just made that venue just that much better.

560
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:52,520
Well, I do have to say this.

561
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:53,520
Okay.

562
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:58,200
Marshall Tucker is 72 years old.

563
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:11,240
And as much as everybody enjoyed the show, you could tell his voice ain't all there anymore.

564
00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:12,560
It's like Ian Gillan.

565
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:14,080
It's like Ian Gillan of Deep Purple.

566
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:17,440
I've seen Deep Purple probably three times in the last four years.

567
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:23,840
And he kept walking off to the side, like he was catching his breath.

568
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:28,760
But it was still a great concert.

569
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:31,080
It was an awesome night.

570
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:34,560
I'm just very happy they're still doing it.

571
00:29:34,560 --> 00:29:44,920
Other than, by the time we left, it was down to like 45 degrees.

572
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:45,920
That's right.

573
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:50,360
It was colder than shit last year.

574
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,160
I had two pairs of socks on.

575
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:54,920
My toes were still going numb.

576
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:56,920
Oh, wow.

577
00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:57,920
Yeah.

578
00:29:57,920 --> 00:30:01,920
The wind was just blowing right through there perfectly.

579
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:03,760
Oh, man.

580
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:04,760
That does suck.

581
00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,760
I had a great time, but it sucked.

582
00:30:06,760 --> 00:30:10,800
I only got 38 special.

583
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:13,160
It sounded awesome.

584
00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:15,640
Sounded just like they did back in the day.

585
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:16,640
Good.

586
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:17,960
I kind of expected that.

587
00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:20,280
I really did expect that.

588
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:21,280
Yeah.

589
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:23,400
And I'll tell you what.

590
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:25,320
They're guitarists.

591
00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:26,320
He's very underrated.

592
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:32,400
He went in that skinnered mold, you know what I mean, where they had these old jams.

593
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:35,240
Anyhow, go ahead.

594
00:30:35,240 --> 00:30:37,240
Do you realize who he is?

595
00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:40,240
The guitarist they have now?

596
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:41,240
No.

597
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:42,240
No, I don't.

598
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:44,240
I don't know what the current lineup is.

599
00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:45,240
Okay.

600
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:48,880
Let's go back to the heavy metal soundtrack.

601
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:49,880
Uh-huh.

602
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:50,880
Don Felder?

603
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:58,960
Do you remember the song Radar Rider by Riggs?

604
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:04,880
And there was also another song by Riggs on that album, Heartbeat.

605
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:05,880
Okay.

606
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:06,880
Okay.

607
00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:09,840
His name is Jerry Riggs.

608
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:10,840
Okay.

609
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,840
And Don Felder is back with the Eagles anyhow, isn't he?

610
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:14,840
Yeah.

611
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,000
He wouldn't be in 38 Special.

612
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:18,000
He'd make more money.

613
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,000
Jerry Riggs is the guitar player.

614
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:22,000
Jerry Riggs.

615
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:26,320
I'll have to look him up because it's not really striking a bell.

616
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:27,320
But you know what?

617
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:30,880
It sounds like, anyhow, I'll look him up later.

618
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:31,880
Yeah.

619
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:34,080
Heavy metal came out in 81.

620
00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:38,480
After heavy metal, he joined Pat Travers in 83.

621
00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:39,480
Okay.

622
00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:40,480
Okay.

623
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:42,120
Now you're speaking my language there.

624
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:43,120
Okay.

625
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:44,720
I love the heavy metal soundtrack.

626
00:31:44,720 --> 00:31:45,720
It was fantastic.

627
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:50,960
Don Felder and Sammy Hagar and, man, there's so many songs on there.

628
00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:51,960
But anyhow, okay.

629
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:52,960
Yeah.

630
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:53,960
Pat Travers.

631
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:56,960
He left Pat Travers in 93.

632
00:31:56,960 --> 00:31:59,720
And he joined 38 Special in 2000.

633
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:00,720
Okay.

634
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:04,440
But he was not Pat Travers' original guitarist, was he?

635
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:05,440
No.

636
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:07,720
But he joined in 83.

637
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:08,720
Okay.

638
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,600
That's going to help me identify him because I think I know who you're talking about now.

639
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:12,600
And he's really good.

640
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:13,600
Okay.

641
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:16,520
He joined in 83 to 93, 10 years.

642
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:17,520
Yes.

643
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:20,360
He actually, he put out a couple of albums with him.

644
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:22,160
He was awesome.

645
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:25,680
He's a very good guitar player.

646
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:26,680
Okay.

647
00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:27,680
Cool.

648
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:32,400
Oh, by the way, Topher's guitar playing has improved immensely.

649
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:37,120
He was playing Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd and doing the note bending like David

650
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:38,120
Gilmore.

651
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:39,120
Oh, cool.

652
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:40,120
Yeah.

653
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:41,120
It was very good.

654
00:32:41,120 --> 00:32:42,120
So, anyhow.

655
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:45,480
So, okay.

656
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:48,080
Anything else you want to add to that or are you good with that?

657
00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:49,080
Oh, yeah.

658
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:50,080
Oh, I would.

659
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:51,080
Go ahead.

660
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:56,680
Give me a bandana to add to my wall in my studio.

661
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:57,680
Cool.

662
00:32:57,680 --> 00:33:00,920
Did you go in the loin cloth like you agreed to?

663
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:03,080
No, dude.

664
00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:04,080
I told you.

665
00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:05,080
It got down to 45.

666
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:06,080
Oh, okay.

667
00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:07,080
No loin cloth.

668
00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:09,080
But he was wearing the two deuce bags and microphone podcast.

669
00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:12,360
I was wearing the two deuce bags and a microphone t-shirt.

670
00:33:12,360 --> 00:33:13,360
Sorry, guys.

671
00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:14,360
No loin cloth.

672
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:15,560
I know everybody was waiting for it.

673
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:21,560
And also, along that note, where is Rob Rad's fucking male junk pictures?

674
00:33:21,560 --> 00:33:23,720
It has dropped off to nothing.

675
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:27,440
The poor man is left holding his fucking dick.

676
00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:31,720
I've got three and I'm about ready to just call it.

677
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:32,720
I don't know.

678
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:33,720
You know.

679
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:34,720
I mean, is that it?

680
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:35,720
Does it end at three?

681
00:33:35,720 --> 00:33:38,720
Is that all Rob Rad is worth?

682
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:39,720
Three picks?

683
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:40,720
Let's go over the week.

684
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:41,720
Okay.

685
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:45,400
We'll give you guys one more fucking week and then Rob Rad is picking his winner and

686
00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:46,400
it's over.

687
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:47,400
Okay?

688
00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:50,400
You want an ultimatum, that's it.

689
00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:53,080
Show him your junk or get out.

690
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:54,080
Right?

691
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:57,120
We're not going to take any hanger-ons after that.

692
00:33:57,120 --> 00:34:00,000
You either show Rob your shit or you're gone.

693
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:01,000
So.

694
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:02,000
Yeah.

695
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:05,320
I mean, we really had much to talk about on that subject.

696
00:34:05,320 --> 00:34:06,320
Yeah.

697
00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:07,320
Yeah.

698
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:08,320
Actually, I haven't been pimping it.

699
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:09,320
I haven't got that promo.

700
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:11,320
I haven't even inserted in a while.

701
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:12,320
So you know what?

702
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:15,840
I need to start putting the promo in there and I need to start pimping it more.

703
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:19,520
So you guys have been told that should be enough.

704
00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:20,520
Anyhow.

705
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:25,560
You ever heard about Wally the emotional support alligator, Rob?

706
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:27,600
No, I haven't.

707
00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:28,600
Okay.

708
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:29,600
This sounds good.

709
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:30,600
This sounds good.

710
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:31,600
Well, allow me.

711
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:32,600
I might need to get one.

712
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:37,800
Well, allow me to introduce you to Wally the emotional support alligator.

713
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:41,880
Wally, the emotional support alligator went to see.

714
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,880
I'm sorry about my dog's barking, but there's nothing I can do about there in the other

715
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:47,320
room so I can't kick the shit out of him.

716
00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:48,840
No, I wouldn't anyhow.

717
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:50,800
So anyhow, let's see.

718
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:55,200
Wally the emotional support alligator went to go see the Phillies game, but then it went

719
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:56,320
viral.

720
00:34:56,320 --> 00:35:01,160
An emotional support alligator walks into a ballpark and was asked to leave.

721
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:04,120
That's the story that made headlines in recent days.

722
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:10,400
Next to viral photos and videos showing Wally, a six foot long, 55 pound alligator wearing

723
00:35:10,400 --> 00:35:12,680
a harness and leash.

724
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:18,340
And his human companion outside Citizens Bank Park during a Phillies game on Wednesday night.

725
00:35:18,340 --> 00:35:23,080
But it's not the whole truth, owner Joey Henney told NPR.

726
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:26,480
We were not there to see the game, but to meet the players.

727
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:30,400
What we went up there for is just to see the players.

728
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:31,400
I was invited.

729
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:32,740
We didn't just show up.

730
00:35:32,740 --> 00:35:38,240
To understand the backstory, you need to know, as Wally's Marietta's social, local admirers

731
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:44,320
and online fans do, just how beloved this eight year old alligator is already.

732
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:51,440
Wally has more than 114,000 followers on TikTok and another 27,000 on Instagram.

733
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:56,000
He's gone viral before, including splashing around in a fountain at Phillies famous love

734
00:35:56,000 --> 00:35:57,040
park.

735
00:35:57,040 --> 00:36:01,600
He posed for the mayor before and plus many other high profile people.

736
00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:03,560
He is world famous.

737
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:07,680
After hearing about the alligator's extreme love and popularity, the team invited him

738
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:09,480
to go meet the players.

739
00:36:09,480 --> 00:36:14,240
Joey told reporters that he was refused and he was told that there were only service animals

740
00:36:14,240 --> 00:36:16,360
allowed, no exceptions.

741
00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:19,960
He said he wouldn't show up without the animal unannounced.

742
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:25,100
Joey also said that the players want him to come back, so he will check and try to figure

743
00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:26,780
out a time later on.

744
00:36:26,780 --> 00:36:31,480
The backlash for being refused was enormous, so we hope the staff will not blow the next

745
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:32,480
meeting.

746
00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:35,600
The team is still waiting to meet Wally.

747
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:42,360
So the team wanted to meet Wally, the emotional support alligator or whatever he is, and it

748
00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:47,320
sounds to me like no one communicated with the front office that this guy with this alligator

749
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:51,320
was going to show up.

750
00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:52,320
So anyhow.

751
00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:57,320
I'm telling you, I want one.

752
00:36:57,320 --> 00:36:59,720
Me too.

753
00:36:59,720 --> 00:37:02,120
That sounds fucking fantastic.

754
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:08,360
I bet my big one will get along great with an alligator.

755
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:11,720
Yeah, yeah, I think so too.

756
00:37:11,720 --> 00:37:14,720
They'd be best buddies.

757
00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:16,560
Yeah, hell yeah.

758
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:20,560
No, man, I'd love to have a pet alligator because you know what that also means?

759
00:37:20,560 --> 00:37:22,560
If someone fucks with you, you have a pet alligator.

760
00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:23,560
They don't.

761
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:24,560
Right?

762
00:37:24,560 --> 00:37:25,560
Exactly.

763
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:26,560
Yeah.

764
00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:29,840
I could use one of them right now.

765
00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:30,840
Oh, you could.

766
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:33,840
You have a ranch you need to get to, Rob.

767
00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:38,640
Yes, I do, which is going to lead me into a promotion.

768
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:39,640
Okay.

769
00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:40,640
Rob, Rob.

770
00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:43,920
You don't mind me taking the floor for a little bit?

771
00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:45,920
Go ahead and take the floor.

772
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:46,920
Okay.

773
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:52,680
Here about two, three weeks ago, I know I talked to you about it.

774
00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:59,640
I don't remember if I covered it on the podcast or not.

775
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:05,000
One evening after we got done with the podcast, I stepped outside for my final cigarette and

776
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:08,480
let my dog out to run for the last time.

777
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:11,480
He's a little beagle.

778
00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:14,200
He's a small beagle.

779
00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:16,000
He don't hurt nobody.

780
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:18,000
Everybody loves him.

781
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:27,280
Well, there happens to be this big black and brown German shepherd in this complex.

782
00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:35,520
Well, about 45 seconds later, it ran by me down into the woods where the boss was.

783
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:42,120
I heard boss make this weird sound like I've never heard him make that sound.

784
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:47,280
I got up and I headed that way and I went to enter the woods.

785
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:54,880
I get about 10 foot in and this German shepherd just darts past me.

786
00:38:54,880 --> 00:39:02,840
I stopped and turned and just as I stopped and turned, it stopped and turned and it started

787
00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:03,840
growling.

788
00:39:03,840 --> 00:39:15,320
I'm getting a little concerned because all I have behind me is the woods.

789
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:18,800
He's got the clearing back behind him.

790
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:22,720
Well, it finally turned around and took off.

791
00:39:22,720 --> 00:39:27,480
I stewed about it because that's a pretty big aggressive dog.

792
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,480
It's a three foot.

793
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:35,400
A couple days later, I had boss on the leash and I was walking.

794
00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:41,080
I ran into the owner out here at the dumpster and I started having words with him.

795
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:45,280
I started telling him, hey man, you've got to keep that dog on a leash.

796
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:48,040
I think that's a reasonable request.

797
00:39:48,040 --> 00:39:50,200
It's an aggressive dog.

798
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:52,640
At least it turned on me.

799
00:39:52,640 --> 00:40:01,000
I said, my dog is a foot and a half tall, which honestly it was kind of funny.

800
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:04,840
I come back in the house, he's one foot eight inches.

801
00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:11,160
He goes, oh man, you're going to come to me like that.

802
00:40:11,160 --> 00:40:20,600
I said, I'll tell you what buddy, your dog comes at me, I'm coming at you.

803
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:27,720
This last Thursday night, I walked up to the grocery store, five minute walk.

804
00:40:27,720 --> 00:40:33,160
Gives me time to smoke a cigarette, get what I need, come back.

805
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:35,240
I am on the city sidewalk.

806
00:40:35,240 --> 00:40:42,600
I haven't even turned down the street to come into our apartment yet.

807
00:40:42,600 --> 00:40:49,520
I'm coming up, it's clearing to where I go up to that street and turn, but there's a

808
00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:55,280
grass area that has dropped down in there a little bit.

809
00:40:55,280 --> 00:41:02,200
I'm walking up and I see that dog running freely in that grass area as I'm coming across

810
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:03,200
this park.

811
00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:09,200
I'm like, okay, here we go.

812
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:10,360
I kind of slow down.

813
00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:14,840
I move all my bags over to one hand, keep one hand free.

814
00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:15,840
You know what I mean?

815
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:20,840
This is what I do.

816
00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:27,960
I slowly start walking, keep moseying that way and all of a sudden that thing spots me.

817
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:37,680
Thank God there's a dip down off the sidewalk, the grass area dips down and then plateaus

818
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:40,680
out flat.

819
00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:42,080
Thank God he was down below.

820
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:45,680
That would have gave me time to do whatever I needed to do.

821
00:41:45,680 --> 00:41:49,080
It just started barking and flipping out on me.

822
00:41:49,080 --> 00:41:51,960
There's cars driving by.

823
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:57,200
I get up close to my street and I could see there's no way that dog was going to let me

824
00:41:57,200 --> 00:41:59,880
turn down that street.

825
00:41:59,880 --> 00:42:06,240
I look down the street and this gentleman that I'm getting rid of, I'm going to promote

826
00:42:06,240 --> 00:42:08,600
the thing he's got going on here.

827
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:09,600
Okay.

828
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:16,680
Well, he happened to be standing out in the street.

829
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:28,400
I'd say maybe an eighth, not even an eighth mile and I could see him standing out there

830
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:31,560
and it looked like he was looking towards me.

831
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:38,840
I just kept having my hand raised and the hair just pointing down.

832
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:47,840
The next thing I know, he walks off and here come three police cars whipping in.

833
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:52,840
I was like, thank you Jesus.

834
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:56,840
I thought this dog was going to eat me.

835
00:42:56,840 --> 00:42:58,600
I should have did it.

836
00:42:58,600 --> 00:42:59,600
Wow.

837
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:00,600
Dude.

838
00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:09,440
They jump out and they went after the dog at the same time and the owner's neighbor

839
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:19,400
was coming up from the apartment yelling for it, trying to get it back.

840
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:24,200
None of the cops said a word to me.

841
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:25,600
I don't know what was going on.

842
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:30,840
But anyway, the guy, he owns Fearstone Fort.

843
00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:38,240
I talk about the haunted forest right here by my apartment complex.

844
00:43:38,240 --> 00:43:43,240
He actually jumped in his car and drove down to pick me up.

845
00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:46,240
When he disappeared, that's what he was doing.

846
00:43:46,240 --> 00:43:47,960
Now who called the police?

847
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:52,880
I don't have a clue.

848
00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:57,440
But I hope this little son of a bitch knows this.

849
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:05,680
Canyon County police are not nice to aggressive dogs.

850
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:08,880
They are known to pull their guns.

851
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:09,880
Yeah.

852
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:13,880
Well, I mean, if they're a dangerous animal, then yeah.

853
00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:17,880
They're big, bad ass German shepherds.

854
00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:19,360
Wow.

855
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:20,360
Okay.

856
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:24,360
Did you want to go over?

857
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:25,360
Okay.

858
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:29,360
I want to talk about Fearstone Forest.

859
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:30,360
Yes.

860
00:44:30,360 --> 00:44:37,880
What it is, it's a haunted forest, like a haunted house.

861
00:44:37,880 --> 00:44:43,360
There's the owner, his wife, his son and his daughter.

862
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:48,840
They have pretty much built this thing with their own hands.

863
00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:49,840
Wow.

864
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:51,820
They had very little help.

865
00:44:51,820 --> 00:44:53,320
It's up and running.

866
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:54,960
It's running right now.

867
00:44:54,960 --> 00:44:58,580
Do they have an internet presence?

868
00:44:58,580 --> 00:45:02,700
Do they have an internet presence?

869
00:45:02,700 --> 00:45:04,060
Yes.

870
00:45:04,060 --> 00:45:05,420
FearstoneForest.com.

871
00:45:05,420 --> 00:45:12,200
There you go, everybody go look at this.

872
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:13,200
It sounds like a great thing.

873
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:15,700
It sounds like a great guy and his family.

874
00:45:15,700 --> 00:45:17,500
Oh, this guy?

875
00:45:17,500 --> 00:45:20,220
He is in the Halloween man.

876
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:26,140
You can also check out Monsters Alive.

877
00:45:26,140 --> 00:45:27,940
Monsters Alive, okay.

878
00:45:27,940 --> 00:45:32,540
Yeah, I believe it's monstersalive.com.

879
00:45:32,540 --> 00:45:36,100
I know there is a Monsters Alive Facebook page.

880
00:45:38,420 --> 00:45:43,420
They also own a really good size hawn house,

881
00:45:43,420 --> 00:45:47,940
a well known hawn house down here, Zombie Wasteland.

882
00:45:47,940 --> 00:45:48,920
Okay, cool.

883
00:45:52,660 --> 00:45:57,700
And they are located at 85 Benny Boulevard

884
00:45:57,700 --> 00:45:59,980
in Camdenton, Missouri.

885
00:45:59,980 --> 00:46:01,340
There you go guys.

886
00:46:01,340 --> 00:46:03,780
Anyone that can make it there, go check it out.

887
00:46:04,900 --> 00:46:07,980
And I also have their schedule for this month.

888
00:46:07,980 --> 00:46:08,960
Okay, go ahead.

889
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:13,960
They're open tonight, right now, from seven to 12.

890
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:25,360
They're open next Friday and Saturday from seven to 12,

891
00:46:26,640 --> 00:46:31,640
but Friday is a special night and I will come back to that.

892
00:46:31,880 --> 00:46:32,720
Okay.

893
00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:37,440
Next Friday night is a special announcement.

894
00:46:37,440 --> 00:46:38,280
Okay.

895
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:45,280
They're open October 20th and 21st from seven to 12,

896
00:46:47,760 --> 00:46:52,760
October 27th and 28th and 29th from seven to 12.

897
00:46:53,040 --> 00:46:56,040
And all those dates are NEH.

898
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:01,120
This is kid friendly.

899
00:47:02,180 --> 00:47:05,600
I have two grandkids working in it right now

900
00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:07,960
over scaring the crap out of people.

901
00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:09,360
Having a great time.

902
00:47:09,360 --> 00:47:10,920
Cool.

903
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:14,680
My 12 year old granddaughter and my seven year old grandson.

904
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:15,520
Okay.

905
00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:16,800
So, you know.

906
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:17,640
Okay, there we go.

907
00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:19,440
All the help are volunteers.

908
00:47:19,440 --> 00:47:20,280
All right.

909
00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:21,100
All the help are volunteers.

910
00:47:21,100 --> 00:47:24,080
There we go, go check this guy out guys.

911
00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:29,080
Now here, Friday, October 13th is a special night.

912
00:47:29,080 --> 00:47:34,000
Is a special night, it is adult only night.

913
00:47:35,740 --> 00:47:36,580
Okay.

914
00:47:37,380 --> 00:47:41,620
And this is the official announcement on this.

915
00:47:41,620 --> 00:47:44,740
I talked to him earlier this afternoon,

916
00:47:44,740 --> 00:47:47,420
told him I was gonna pimp him on the show tonight.

917
00:47:47,420 --> 00:47:48,260
Okay, cool.

918
00:47:48,260 --> 00:47:51,520
And he gave me a special announcement.

919
00:47:51,520 --> 00:47:56,520
If you show up Friday, October 13th, you have the opportunity

920
00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:09,360
to play in a movie, dress up and play in a movie

921
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:11,360
that is being filmed that night.

922
00:48:11,360 --> 00:48:12,200
Oh cool.

923
00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:13,600
Good.

924
00:48:13,600 --> 00:48:14,440
Everybody.

925
00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:18,160
This was a quick conversation.

926
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:20,160
I did not get specifics.

927
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:22,720
I will speak with him again.

928
00:48:22,720 --> 00:48:24,960
I see him pretty much every day.

929
00:48:27,160 --> 00:48:31,000
And get specifics on how we can watch this movie

930
00:48:31,000 --> 00:48:33,120
and what's gonna go along with it.

931
00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:34,640
Okay, sounds good Rob.

932
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:35,960
Thank you.

933
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:36,780
Alrighty.

934
00:48:36,780 --> 00:48:37,620
You're welcome.

935
00:48:37,620 --> 00:48:38,640
Okay, that sounds great.

936
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:40,320
Everybody go check him out.

937
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:41,920
We'll be right back after this.

938
00:48:44,280 --> 00:48:47,560
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

939
00:48:47,560 --> 00:48:50,320
It's strange insults from an alien.

940
00:48:50,320 --> 00:48:52,280
Real hilarity.

941
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:54,600
Don't be ashamed of who you are.

942
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:55,960
That's your parents job.

943
00:48:57,360 --> 00:48:59,600
And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

944
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:07,120
Okay, so a donut is a fried dough ball

945
00:49:07,120 --> 00:49:09,440
with a glazed sugar topping.

946
00:49:09,440 --> 00:49:11,640
A beignet is a fried dough ball

947
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:13,700
with a glazed sugar topping.

948
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:17,000
Wouldn't that be the same thing?

949
00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:18,240
Hmm.

950
00:49:18,240 --> 00:49:19,320
I may never know.

951
00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:26,360
Next up, things overheard in hell.

952
00:49:27,440 --> 00:49:30,320
The Mark Zuckerberg comedy hour

953
00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:33,320
has been recorded by the hero, Susan.

954
00:49:34,280 --> 00:49:38,280
["The Mark Zuckerberg Comedy Hour"]

955
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:42,280
["The Mark Zuckerberg Comedy Hour"]

956
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:47,760
Hey, I'm Rob.

957
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:49,600
All right, we just had a little hiatus there.

958
00:49:49,600 --> 00:49:52,400
I had a very friendly raccoon

959
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:53,640
that would not leave my porch

960
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:55,880
because my dogs would not shut up.

961
00:49:55,880 --> 00:49:56,940
And when I went out there,

962
00:49:56,940 --> 00:49:58,120
he thought it was play time

963
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:00,280
instead of get off the fucking porch time.

964
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:03,320
Only me, only me.

965
00:50:03,320 --> 00:50:04,160
I'm like, get out of here.

966
00:50:04,160 --> 00:50:06,040
I got a podcast to do, come on.

967
00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:06,880
And he's like,

968
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:10,080
hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, look, look,

969
00:50:10,080 --> 00:50:11,200
I'm cute, I'm beautiful.

970
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:12,520
Look, pet me.

971
00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:17,000
So anyhow, do you, you know, Rob,

972
00:50:17,000 --> 00:50:19,680
you, every day is like a national day.

973
00:50:19,680 --> 00:50:22,300
Like, you know, they have national taco day,

974
00:50:22,300 --> 00:50:24,640
national left-hander day, right, okay.

975
00:50:24,640 --> 00:50:27,840
So right now, as I speak,

976
00:50:27,840 --> 00:50:29,960
and I wrote this the other day,

977
00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:31,760
today is national coaches day.

978
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:33,220
This is a couple of days ago,

979
00:50:33,220 --> 00:50:35,960
World College Radio Day,

980
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:37,560
National Orange Wine Day,

981
00:50:37,560 --> 00:50:39,640
and National Body Language Day.

982
00:50:40,720 --> 00:50:42,280
Tomorrow, as in yesterday,

983
00:50:42,280 --> 00:50:44,800
will be National Sober Day,

984
00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:46,420
National Day of Encouragement,

985
00:50:46,420 --> 00:50:47,820
and Patriot Day.

986
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:50,760
Okay.

987
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:55,720
Now, you know how people get national days?

988
00:50:55,720 --> 00:50:58,460
You know how national days are originated?

989
00:50:58,460 --> 00:51:00,620
I mean, because everyone talks about these

990
00:51:00,620 --> 00:51:02,380
on talk shows, radio, and all that,

991
00:51:02,380 --> 00:51:04,720
but everything's a national day of some sort.

992
00:51:04,720 --> 00:51:06,440
Usually sharing the bill with like

993
00:51:06,440 --> 00:51:08,840
three or four other days, right?

994
00:51:08,840 --> 00:51:09,680
Yeah.

995
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:10,500
Okay.

996
00:51:10,500 --> 00:51:12,500
Here is how you get a national day.

997
00:51:13,740 --> 00:51:16,020
Go to nationaldaycalendar.com,

998
00:51:17,160 --> 00:51:19,460
check register a national day,

999
00:51:20,660 --> 00:51:22,960
read the instructions for submission,

1000
00:51:22,960 --> 00:51:26,040
remember you can't create a day for someone specific,

1001
00:51:26,920 --> 00:51:29,200
and write a compelling story about

1002
00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:33,040
why your organization's day should be chosen

1003
00:51:33,040 --> 00:51:36,960
and how you might celebrate that day if it gets chosen.

1004
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:38,800
So that's the only guidelines.

1005
00:51:39,820 --> 00:51:41,780
And I don't know who this panel is.

1006
00:51:41,780 --> 00:51:43,000
It doesn't go into that.

1007
00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:44,080
I could not find it.

1008
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:45,880
I checked all over.

1009
00:51:45,880 --> 00:51:47,440
It doesn't say who this panel is.

1010
00:51:47,440 --> 00:51:49,440
I don't even know if it's governmental.

1011
00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:52,560
I think it would be, but I don't know.

1012
00:51:53,540 --> 00:51:58,260
But anyhow, somehow this panel that magically appears

1013
00:51:58,260 --> 00:52:01,320
judges whether you should get that national day or not,

1014
00:52:01,320 --> 00:52:02,760
or whoever does,

1015
00:52:02,760 --> 00:52:05,480
according to what it is, why,

1016
00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:08,000
and how you will celebrate when you get this day.

1017
00:52:09,720 --> 00:52:10,760
So isn't that weird?

1018
00:52:12,160 --> 00:52:13,300
Yeah, yeah.

1019
00:52:13,300 --> 00:52:16,680
Okay, so as everything that I just said,

1020
00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,040
here's what I got.

1021
00:52:18,040 --> 00:52:21,000
I would like to encourage everyone using the next guidelines

1022
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,360
to get a national day to submit national

1023
00:52:23,360 --> 00:52:25,680
smack an idiot really hard in the face day.

1024
00:52:26,760 --> 00:52:27,600
Doesn't that sound good?

1025
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:28,440
Oh, I'm in.

1026
00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:29,280
Me too.

1027
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:31,240
Also.

1028
00:52:31,240 --> 00:52:32,880
I'll second that.

1029
00:52:32,880 --> 00:52:35,960
I mean, just smack him in the fucking face

1030
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:37,560
as hard as you can day.

1031
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:41,080
We can like tweak it a little bit if we have to,

1032
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:44,160
but I think we're getting the idea across.

1033
00:52:44,160 --> 00:52:45,240
Okay, here comes idiot.

1034
00:52:45,240 --> 00:52:46,800
Oh, hey, idiot, bam.

1035
00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:48,000
You know, job done.

1036
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:49,140
You feel better?

1037
00:52:49,140 --> 00:52:51,760
They hurt, they're lying on the ground, bleeding, crying.

1038
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:55,040
Yeah, they have to meet certain idiot criteria.

1039
00:52:55,040 --> 00:52:56,840
Yes, yeah, we can't just let people go.

1040
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,040
You can't walk up to anybody on the street

1041
00:52:59,040 --> 00:52:59,880
and just smack them.

1042
00:52:59,880 --> 00:53:00,700
Yeah, yeah.

1043
00:53:00,700 --> 00:53:01,540
When we submit this.

1044
00:53:01,540 --> 00:53:02,680
They look like an idiot.

1045
00:53:02,680 --> 00:53:05,680
When this is submitted, we want it to be worded right,

1046
00:53:05,680 --> 00:53:08,400
so we'll figure it out and we want it to stick.

1047
00:53:08,400 --> 00:53:11,920
So that way people can't go, hey, I don't like that guy,

1048
00:53:11,920 --> 00:53:14,600
so I'm gonna smack him because of national smack an idiot day.

1049
00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:17,040
They have to be a proven idiot somehow.

1050
00:53:17,040 --> 00:53:19,020
So I think we need that day.

1051
00:53:19,020 --> 00:53:20,920
I think it's long overdue.

1052
00:53:20,920 --> 00:53:25,920
So everybody, you know, douchebag B at hotmail,

1053
00:53:26,840 --> 00:53:28,920
66 at hotmail.com.

1054
00:53:28,920 --> 00:53:30,000
Oh no, not douchebag.

1055
00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:31,840
I'm sorry, I keep fucking it up too.

1056
00:53:31,840 --> 00:53:36,840
Douche, doucheB66 at yahoo.com.

1057
00:53:37,120 --> 00:53:40,060
DoucheB66 at yahoo.com.

1058
00:53:40,060 --> 00:53:43,400
Help us formulate this formula

1059
00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:45,680
for smack an idiot really hard day.

1060
00:53:45,680 --> 00:53:46,960
It really needs to happen.

1061
00:53:46,960 --> 00:53:48,200
It's been coming for a long time.

1062
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:50,260
So come on guys, let's pull together.

1063
00:53:50,260 --> 00:53:52,760
Let's get this thing through whatever these hoops

1064
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:53,600
and let's do it.

1065
00:53:53,600 --> 00:53:56,280
And then we can explicitly explain

1066
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:59,420
how we're gonna slap the idiot and why and how hard.

1067
00:53:59,420 --> 00:54:01,640
So there you go.

1068
00:54:01,640 --> 00:54:03,880
And while you're doing that,

1069
00:54:03,880 --> 00:54:06,720
I also would like for you to please remember

1070
00:54:06,720 --> 00:54:11,200
to submit national two douchebags and microphone day as well

1071
00:54:11,200 --> 00:54:14,120
because we're gonna be subjected to being slapped all day.

1072
00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:16,880
Might as well get a day for both of us to do it.

1073
00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:17,920
Yeah, right.

1074
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:18,760
People are gonna be like,

1075
00:54:18,760 --> 00:54:22,160
yeah, here's these two idiots to do that horrible podcast.

1076
00:54:22,160 --> 00:54:25,400
I'm gonna smack them in the face as hard as I can.

1077
00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:26,920
And you know, if we're gonna,

1078
00:54:26,920 --> 00:54:29,280
I mean, we might as well double bill it, right?

1079
00:54:29,280 --> 00:54:32,240
It'll be national two douchebags and a microphone day.

1080
00:54:32,240 --> 00:54:34,220
And it'll also be everybody slapping us

1081
00:54:34,220 --> 00:54:35,480
in the fucking face day.

1082
00:54:36,800 --> 00:54:39,960
So there you go, peoples.

1083
00:54:39,960 --> 00:54:42,280
What, while you're talking about the email,

1084
00:54:42,280 --> 00:54:46,200
has anybody answered my question

1085
00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:50,040
about whether they wanna hear reports about wrestling?

1086
00:54:51,240 --> 00:54:52,320
Hang on.

1087
00:54:52,320 --> 00:54:54,040
I actually haven't looked at the email

1088
00:54:54,040 --> 00:54:55,320
and I'm afraid to hang on.

1089
00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:56,160
Let me look here.

1090
00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:57,200
Get back with me tomorrow on that.

1091
00:54:57,200 --> 00:54:58,360
Get back with me tomorrow.

1092
00:54:58,360 --> 00:54:59,280
I will.

1093
00:54:59,280 --> 00:55:01,400
Oh, there's a few email.

1094
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:02,560
Oh shit, there's,

1095
00:55:05,640 --> 00:55:07,120
there's eight emails.

1096
00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:08,960
I'm sure some of them are about that.

1097
00:55:08,960 --> 00:55:10,080
Get back with me tomorrow on that.

1098
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:10,920
I will.

1099
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:14,240
What I'll do is I'll jot them down, the name and everything.

1100
00:55:14,240 --> 00:55:15,080
Yeah, yeah.

1101
00:55:15,080 --> 00:55:20,080
Cause I get a lot of them on my notifications

1102
00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:24,400
about current WWE and AEW,

1103
00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:27,520
which I grew up watching wrestling.

1104
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:32,040
You know, I mean, I don't have to watch it every week, but.

1105
00:55:32,040 --> 00:55:34,800
Look, you're making a big mistake, Rob.

1106
00:55:34,800 --> 00:55:36,920
I do play for T-TOP Fuss.

1107
00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:39,600
So I go watch the WWE tape reviews.

1108
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:42,720
Rob, it's not wrestling, it's rasslin'.

1109
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:45,120
Rasslin'.

1110
00:55:45,120 --> 00:55:46,440
Good point, good point.

1111
00:55:46,440 --> 00:55:47,640
Okay.

1112
00:55:47,640 --> 00:55:50,720
All right, now that we've got that cleared up,

1113
00:55:50,720 --> 00:55:52,080
it's rasslin'.

1114
00:55:52,080 --> 00:55:54,000
And if you don't know what rasslin' means,

1115
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:55,040
turn the segment off.

1116
00:55:55,040 --> 00:55:56,160
You don't deserve it.

1117
00:55:56,160 --> 00:56:01,160
So, anyhow, Brad Rob is gonna speak rasslin' to you guys

1118
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:03,280
if you guys clamor for it enough.

1119
00:56:03,280 --> 00:56:08,160
And that's where DoucheB66 at yahoo.com comes in.

1120
00:56:08,160 --> 00:56:10,000
So voice your opinion, let us know.

1121
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:10,840
That is the correct email.

1122
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:11,960
That is the correct email.

1123
00:56:11,960 --> 00:56:13,280
That is the correct email.

1124
00:56:13,280 --> 00:56:16,120
I'm sure people send them to all other fucking places

1125
00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:17,720
and they're like, what the hell?

1126
00:56:19,520 --> 00:56:20,360
So.

1127
00:56:20,360 --> 00:56:25,360
We got a new version of Babble Snatch.

1128
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:28,560
Yeah.

1129
00:56:28,560 --> 00:56:30,680
Yeah, we could have some fun.

1130
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:31,920
Yeah, we could.

1131
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:35,600
Yeah, so please write us, let us know.

1132
00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:38,160
I got another little article here.

1133
00:56:39,040 --> 00:56:41,160
I don't think if you think about it, Rob,

1134
00:56:41,160 --> 00:56:45,320
that it's gonna be too big of a surprise, okay?

1135
00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:47,400
You know younger people, right?

1136
00:56:47,400 --> 00:56:49,880
And you see their habits, okay?

1137
00:56:49,880 --> 00:56:51,480
All right.

1138
00:56:51,480 --> 00:56:54,400
According to the CEO of Molson Coors,

1139
00:56:54,400 --> 00:56:56,760
Gen Z is not into beer.

1140
00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:01,520
Thanks to an epic collapse in demand for Bud Light,

1141
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:04,360
Molson Coors cleaned up this summer

1142
00:57:04,360 --> 00:57:08,080
when it came to expanding tap handlers

1143
00:57:08,080 --> 00:57:11,000
and bars and shelf space in stores.

1144
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:14,160
But it's the world's fourth biggest brewer wants to

1145
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:17,160
grow both sales and earnings for a third concept

1146
00:57:17,160 --> 00:57:18,760
of the year in 2024.

1147
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:21,640
It needs to respond quickly to a shift in taste

1148
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:24,280
among young drinkers and look beyond

1149
00:57:24,280 --> 00:57:27,360
its conventional portfolio led by Coors Light

1150
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:29,000
and Miller Light.

1151
00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:33,360
According to Molson Coors, Gen Z legal drinking age

1152
00:57:33,360 --> 00:57:37,480
consumers or LADCs as management calls them

1153
00:57:37,480 --> 00:57:41,200
are consuming 20% less alcohol than millennials did

1154
00:57:41,200 --> 00:57:43,240
and when they were at the same age,

1155
00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:47,480
a full 30% of Gen Z cohort don't drink alcohol at all.

1156
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:49,880
The company's research shows.

1157
00:57:49,880 --> 00:57:52,280
That plays right into the overall strategy

1158
00:57:52,280 --> 00:57:53,920
where we're moving beyond beer.

1159
00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:55,960
We're moving into non-alcoholic products,

1160
00:57:55,960 --> 00:57:59,120
whether these are energy drinks or whatever,

1161
00:57:59,120 --> 00:58:01,400
whatever they are, they're non-alcoholic beers

1162
00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:02,680
or energy drinks.

1163
00:58:02,680 --> 00:58:07,040
CEO Gavin Hattersley told CNBC's Mad Money

1164
00:58:07,040 --> 00:58:09,320
host Jim Cramer on Wednesday.

1165
00:58:09,320 --> 00:58:12,880
The interview came up after this week's investor day

1166
00:58:12,880 --> 00:58:16,440
where Hattersley's executive team unveiled their plans

1167
00:58:16,440 --> 00:58:18,800
to defend their market share gains

1168
00:58:18,800 --> 00:58:22,080
in light of premium beers that compromise

1169
00:58:22,080 --> 00:58:24,520
a bulk of its business while pushing

1170
00:58:24,520 --> 00:58:26,480
into new product categories.

1171
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:30,360
The non-alcoholic beer company today compromises

1172
00:58:30,360 --> 00:58:33,920
less than 1% of the market, but it is expanding

1173
00:58:33,920 --> 00:58:37,040
at a double digit rate to better capture that growth.

1174
00:58:37,040 --> 00:58:40,400
Molson Coors is launching new alcoholic free versions

1175
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:44,520
of Kraft Belgian White style brand of wheat beer

1176
00:58:44,520 --> 00:58:45,600
and Blue Moon.

1177
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:47,040
One of our biggest innovators,

1178
00:58:47,040 --> 00:58:49,920
which I think is gonna be a big deal for us,

1179
00:58:49,920 --> 00:58:52,760
is to launch Blue Moon non-alcoholics,

1180
00:58:52,760 --> 00:58:55,000
which we're bringing in December,

1181
00:58:55,000 --> 00:59:00,000
just in time for dry January, Hattersley told Cramer.

1182
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:06,440
Molson Coors is also expanding its partnership

1183
00:59:06,440 --> 00:59:09,360
with Coca-Cola company to include a new piece

1184
00:59:09,360 --> 00:59:12,040
hard tea brand in addition to their spiked versions

1185
00:59:12,040 --> 00:59:15,400
of the latter's Simply line of juices.

1186
00:59:15,400 --> 00:59:18,400
The brewer is also aiming to reach Gen Z consumers

1187
00:59:18,400 --> 00:59:21,760
who drink alcohol with his Vizzi hard silzer.

1188
00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:24,420
I didn't know they owned Vizzi too, wow.

1189
00:59:24,420 --> 00:59:27,840
But one key pillar is his strategy involves further

1190
00:59:27,840 --> 00:59:31,880
to develop the line of zero sugar energy drinks like ZOA,

1191
00:59:31,880 --> 00:59:34,520
which is co-founded by Dwayne The Rock Johnson.

1192
00:59:34,520 --> 00:59:39,520
I didn't know ZOA, Z-O-A, that zero calorie energy drink,

1193
00:59:40,360 --> 00:59:45,240
zero sugar is owned by The Rock, Dwayne Johnson.

1194
00:59:45,240 --> 00:59:47,600
In September, yeah, there you go.

1195
00:59:47,600 --> 00:59:50,240
Hey, that went right into Rasslin' News, didn't it?

1196
00:59:51,960 --> 00:59:53,320
Yeah, it did, yeah it did.

1197
00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:55,000
Oh, he's all over the news.

1198
00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:55,840
Oh, I know.

1199
00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:57,880
He's calling Kaepernick a job.

1200
00:59:57,880 --> 00:59:59,180
What'd he offer him for?

1201
01:00:00,240 --> 01:00:02,740
Oh no, to play in the CFL.

1202
01:00:02,740 --> 01:00:04,100
Oh, he owns the team?

1203
01:00:06,160 --> 01:00:07,000
Yeah.

1204
01:00:07,000 --> 01:00:09,200
Oh, well, Dwayne The Rock Johnson

1205
01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:11,900
is a very intelligent businessman

1206
01:00:11,900 --> 01:00:14,400
and also just a very intelligent person.

1207
01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:16,880
It's fun to watch him and to see him

1208
01:00:16,880 --> 01:00:18,620
and to see what he's doing

1209
01:00:18,620 --> 01:00:21,700
because he's not just some roided out jock

1210
01:00:21,700 --> 01:00:24,120
and I'm not saying he's on roids ever.

1211
01:00:24,120 --> 01:00:27,800
I'm just saying he's a very intelligent businessman

1212
01:00:27,800 --> 01:00:28,640
and I respect him a lot.

1213
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:29,480
Yes, he is.

1214
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:37,040
So anyhow, Molson-Kurst struck a deal with Johnson

1215
01:00:37,200 --> 01:00:39,800
for a minority stake and remained the line's

1216
01:00:39,800 --> 01:00:43,700
executive distribution partner

1217
01:00:43,700 --> 01:00:45,740
while gaining a seat on its board

1218
01:00:45,740 --> 01:00:47,600
to help Molson-Kurst better understand

1219
01:00:47,600 --> 01:00:49,560
the tastes of younger consumer group

1220
01:00:49,560 --> 01:00:52,320
and what types of beverages it might appeal to them.

1221
01:00:52,320 --> 01:00:54,520
Its management has developed what they call

1222
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:57,380
a legal age Gen Z culture panel.

1223
01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:03,480
Okay, all right, I'm sorry, I can't help

1224
01:01:03,480 --> 01:01:07,680
but back when SNL was good,

1225
01:01:07,680 --> 01:01:10,160
that would've been a great Saturday Night Live skit, right?

1226
01:01:10,160 --> 01:01:12,640
Yeah, it would've, yeah it would've.

1227
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:17,200
Yeah, if we want to build what they want,

1228
01:01:17,200 --> 01:01:19,760
we need to know what makes them tick.

1229
01:01:19,760 --> 01:01:23,040
Chief Commercial Officer Michelle St. Jaquis

1230
01:01:23,040 --> 01:01:25,120
told investors on Tuesday,

1231
01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:27,440
according to Gallup's Lydia Saad,

1232
01:01:27,440 --> 01:01:30,120
young consumers deem, you know what,

1233
01:01:30,120 --> 01:01:31,560
fuck the rest of this.

1234
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:33,840
You got the point.

1235
01:01:33,840 --> 01:01:37,520
Hey, hey, hey, I just had one question

1236
01:01:37,520 --> 01:01:39,400
out of that whole article.

1237
01:01:39,400 --> 01:01:40,640
Okay, what is it?

1238
01:01:40,640 --> 01:01:41,480
Sorry guys.

1239
01:01:41,480 --> 01:01:45,360
Was white, was white crawl on the non-alcoholic list?

1240
01:01:47,600 --> 01:01:49,480
You know what, I don't know.

1241
01:01:49,480 --> 01:01:51,720
I didn't see it, no, it was not on there.

1242
01:01:51,720 --> 01:01:53,880
Here, hang on, let me look here.

1243
01:01:53,880 --> 01:01:55,720
Let me look at the rest of the article.

1244
01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:57,060
Oh no, no, no, no.

1245
01:02:00,040 --> 01:02:00,880
Hang on.

1246
01:02:01,960 --> 01:02:06,480
No, nope, it was not on there.

1247
01:02:06,480 --> 01:02:08,120
What, why was it on there?

1248
01:02:08,120 --> 01:02:08,960
Damn it.

1249
01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:12,120
Well, you know what, okay, hey Rob.

1250
01:02:12,120 --> 01:02:13,920
I was hoping somebody would have finally

1251
01:02:13,920 --> 01:02:15,640
answered that question.

1252
01:02:15,640 --> 01:02:17,960
Rob, give it time, give it time.

1253
01:02:21,040 --> 01:02:24,340
And Rob, do you have anything you want to go into?

1254
01:02:24,340 --> 01:02:26,960
Yeah, I got a little Lake Area news here.

1255
01:02:26,960 --> 01:02:29,000
All right, we always love Lake Area news.

1256
01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:31,640
And here comes KRMS radio.

1257
01:02:34,240 --> 01:02:37,360
As the city of Osage Beach continues looking forward

1258
01:02:37,360 --> 01:02:40,760
to new developments which are currently underway,

1259
01:02:40,760 --> 01:02:43,560
namely the Lakeport Entertainment District

1260
01:02:43,560 --> 01:02:48,320
and the Preserve at Sycamore Creek Residential Community,

1261
01:02:48,320 --> 01:02:51,240
there's also been some talk about the possibility

1262
01:02:51,240 --> 01:02:54,740
of a pedestrian bridge spanning the length

1263
01:02:54,740 --> 01:02:56,640
of the Grand Glades Bridge.

1264
01:02:58,800 --> 01:03:01,880
However, according to Mayor Michael Hodgson

1265
01:03:01,880 --> 01:03:06,520
speaking this week on KRMS radio and TV,

1266
01:03:06,520 --> 01:03:09,640
the concept has run into a major roadblock.

1267
01:03:10,880 --> 01:03:11,720
Okay.

1268
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:16,720
I was notified Friday by MoDOT that the bridge,

1269
01:03:16,880 --> 01:03:20,320
the current Grand Glades Bridge will not support

1270
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:23,480
a walking pedestrian bridge attached.

1271
01:03:23,480 --> 01:03:26,440
It would need to be at least 12 feet

1272
01:03:26,440 --> 01:03:28,800
and it's just not capable.

1273
01:03:28,800 --> 01:03:29,640
So this is-

1274
01:03:29,640 --> 01:03:33,540
Hodgson also says there's a possible Plan B

1275
01:03:33,540 --> 01:03:37,200
in the way of a freestanding pedestrian bridge

1276
01:03:37,200 --> 01:03:39,920
which will be much more expensive.

1277
01:03:41,360 --> 01:03:43,960
Pedestrian bridges are the cool thing now.

1278
01:03:43,960 --> 01:03:46,340
That is like the hip daddy thing.

1279
01:03:47,520 --> 01:03:48,820
Like I was saying in Louisville,

1280
01:03:48,820 --> 01:03:50,880
they have a cool pedestrian bridge

1281
01:03:51,960 --> 01:03:56,960
that connects Louisville to Jeffersonville, Indiana.

1282
01:03:58,560 --> 01:04:02,640
Omaha has the, Fred the Talking Bridge is what they call it.

1283
01:04:02,640 --> 01:04:03,760
You go up there and push a button

1284
01:04:03,760 --> 01:04:05,480
and it tells you about itself.

1285
01:04:05,480 --> 01:04:08,260
And in the middle of the Missouri River

1286
01:04:08,260 --> 01:04:09,880
separates Iowa and Nebraska

1287
01:04:09,880 --> 01:04:11,480
and they have the point there in the middle of the river

1288
01:04:11,480 --> 01:04:12,640
and they have a little circle there.

1289
01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:13,480
You can sit down and go,

1290
01:04:13,480 --> 01:04:15,760
hey, I'm both in Iowa and Nebraska right now.

1291
01:04:15,760 --> 01:04:19,280
Look, my left is right, my, you know, and do that.

1292
01:04:19,280 --> 01:04:23,880
And Kansas City is doing the Rock Island Bridge

1293
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:28,880
which is gonna be a green space, nature trails, bars,

1294
01:04:28,880 --> 01:04:33,880
restaurants, nightclubs, coffee shops, knickknack stuff,

1295
01:04:34,200 --> 01:04:36,840
t-shirt stores and all this all on the bridge.

1296
01:04:36,840 --> 01:04:39,120
It's an old steel truss bridge.

1297
01:04:39,120 --> 01:04:40,400
This is the thing that is-

1298
01:04:40,400 --> 01:04:45,400
It's an old railway bridge.

1299
01:04:45,400 --> 01:04:47,560
Yeah, it's an old truss railway bridge.

1300
01:04:47,560 --> 01:04:48,400
Yes.

1301
01:04:48,400 --> 01:04:52,120
Well, down here, Rock Island is a big deal.

1302
01:04:53,080 --> 01:04:54,240
Oh, the railway.

1303
01:04:54,240 --> 01:04:55,640
A lot of people may think

1304
01:04:55,640 --> 01:04:58,400
there's a Rock Island scrap yard.

1305
01:04:58,400 --> 01:04:59,240
Yeah.

1306
01:04:59,240 --> 01:05:00,080
Yeah.

1307
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:03,800
It's about the rail yard.

1308
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:04,640
Okay.

1309
01:05:04,640 --> 01:05:07,580
So yeah, it came down through here too.

1310
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:10,160
Okay, I even hear they're gonna build

1311
01:05:10,160 --> 01:05:12,480
another Rock Island Bridge in Montrose.

1312
01:05:12,480 --> 01:05:13,320
No, no, no.

1313
01:05:13,320 --> 01:05:15,080
I'm joking around.

1314
01:05:15,080 --> 01:05:17,320
You know how we're teasing around about Montrose,

1315
01:05:17,320 --> 01:05:19,900
the epicenter of Bates, or no, Henry County,

1316
01:05:21,300 --> 01:05:23,220
the junk yard and the power plant.

1317
01:05:23,220 --> 01:05:25,280
I heard they're gonna build a pedestrian bridge

1318
01:05:25,280 --> 01:05:26,320
to the boilers.

1319
01:05:26,320 --> 01:05:29,520
Okay, yeah.

1320
01:05:29,520 --> 01:05:31,400
Okay, anyhow.

1321
01:05:31,400 --> 01:05:33,480
And also in Kansas City, they're also working on-

1322
01:05:33,480 --> 01:05:34,800
I want the taros.

1323
01:05:34,800 --> 01:05:35,760
Okay.

1324
01:05:35,760 --> 01:05:38,280
They're also working on a pedestrian bridge

1325
01:05:38,280 --> 01:05:42,500
going over the crystal blue waters of the Missouri River,

1326
01:05:43,520 --> 01:05:45,080
going over that- Oh, beautiful.

1327
01:05:45,080 --> 01:05:48,400
From North Kansas City, which is its own city,

1328
01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:50,400
to Kansas City Mo Proper.

1329
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:51,640
And that's gonna be a great thing

1330
01:05:51,640 --> 01:05:54,440
because now people can get across.

1331
01:05:54,440 --> 01:05:56,040
People go to the city market,

1332
01:05:56,040 --> 01:05:58,040
they can go, if you're familiar with Kansas City,

1333
01:05:58,040 --> 01:05:59,720
they go to Richard Berkeley Park.

1334
01:05:59,720 --> 01:06:03,440
And they can do this from North Kansas City, Missouri.

1335
01:06:03,440 --> 01:06:07,120
They're also gonna expand the streetcar over the river

1336
01:06:07,120 --> 01:06:08,520
to North Kansas City, Missouri.

1337
01:06:08,520 --> 01:06:11,000
And also the new Royals, Cochman Stadium,

1338
01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:12,600
whatever it's gonna be called,

1339
01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:15,320
they're thinking they might put on the north side

1340
01:06:15,320 --> 01:06:18,000
of the river in North Kansas City, Missouri,

1341
01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:21,240
with an open air ballpark that faces the skyline

1342
01:06:21,240 --> 01:06:23,800
and the river and the bluffs of Kansas City, Missouri.

1343
01:06:23,800 --> 01:06:27,360
And that would be perfect because, like I said,

1344
01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:29,480
these pedestrian bridges, people love them.

1345
01:06:29,480 --> 01:06:30,880
I mean, they're great.

1346
01:06:30,880 --> 01:06:32,960
So anyhow, that's a great thing,

1347
01:06:32,960 --> 01:06:34,760
but I wanna get one thing clear, Rob.

1348
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:37,560
Okay, this is gonna be over Lake of the Ozarks,

1349
01:06:37,560 --> 01:06:39,600
Niagara Arm, right?

1350
01:06:41,280 --> 01:06:42,120
Yeah, yeah.

1351
01:06:42,120 --> 01:06:47,120
It's the bridge as you're going down, 54 through O.C.

1352
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:49,440
Yeah, 54, yes.

1353
01:06:49,440 --> 01:06:54,440
And that's where the resorts are over there on the right.

1354
01:06:54,720 --> 01:06:57,200
If you're going towards, if you're going towards Camp Dade.

1355
01:06:57,200 --> 01:06:59,960
Yeah, there's a bunch of condos.

1356
01:06:59,960 --> 01:07:01,120
Yes, okay.

1357
01:07:01,120 --> 01:07:04,320
It's where they pretty much divided

1358
01:07:04,320 --> 01:07:06,520
the east side of the lake and the west side of the lake.

1359
01:07:06,520 --> 01:07:08,400
Yes, okay, I did that for my own

1360
01:07:08,400 --> 01:07:10,240
because I'm familiar with the area.

1361
01:07:10,240 --> 01:07:12,320
I've been there quite a bit.

1362
01:07:12,320 --> 01:07:14,160
And I just wanna make sure I get what you're talking about.

1363
01:07:14,160 --> 01:07:16,000
Yes, right in the heart of O.C.

1364
01:07:16,000 --> 01:07:20,040
You see, that's a brilliant idea.

1365
01:07:20,040 --> 01:07:23,200
And then they can put businesses on each side,

1366
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:24,600
shops, all that.

1367
01:07:24,600 --> 01:07:27,160
I mean, it makes optimal amount of sense.

1368
01:07:27,160 --> 01:07:30,600
It brings in businesses, commerce, and interest.

1369
01:07:30,600 --> 01:07:32,760
So yeah, good.

1370
01:07:32,760 --> 01:07:35,520
Already businesses and a lot of people,

1371
01:07:35,520 --> 01:07:38,520
you know, nice, well, a lot of people walk.

1372
01:07:38,520 --> 01:07:40,360
It'd be a great walk, it's beautiful.

1373
01:07:40,360 --> 01:07:42,840
And people walk for exercise.

1374
01:07:42,840 --> 01:07:43,680
That is the best.

1375
01:07:43,680 --> 01:07:46,880
Yeah, it'd be nice to have a pedestrian sidewalk.

1376
01:07:46,880 --> 01:07:49,520
That is the best, that is the prettiest part

1377
01:07:49,520 --> 01:07:51,880
of Lake of Ozarks, I think, anyhow.

1378
01:07:51,880 --> 01:07:53,200
The waters and everything.

1379
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:56,240
So, I mean, I think it makes a lot of sense.

1380
01:07:56,240 --> 01:07:57,840
So, okay.

1381
01:07:57,840 --> 01:07:58,920
Thank you, Rob.

1382
01:07:58,920 --> 01:08:00,280
That was a really good report.

1383
01:08:00,280 --> 01:08:01,760
We'll see where it goes.

1384
01:08:01,760 --> 01:08:02,880
I mean, you never know.

1385
01:08:02,880 --> 01:08:06,880
It may take 20 years, but we'll see.

1386
01:08:06,880 --> 01:08:08,480
I don't think it's gonna take 20 years

1387
01:08:08,480 --> 01:08:10,360
because right now is when these,

1388
01:08:10,360 --> 01:08:12,760
this is when the pedestrian bridges are hot.

1389
01:08:12,760 --> 01:08:15,560
People love them and they're building them everywhere.

1390
01:08:15,560 --> 01:08:18,200
So, I think it's gonna happen here soon.

1391
01:08:18,200 --> 01:08:19,600
They need to take advantage of it.

1392
01:08:19,600 --> 01:08:20,680
They need to find the funds.

1393
01:08:20,680 --> 01:08:23,280
They could probably even get federal funds

1394
01:08:23,280 --> 01:08:25,280
because it's in the interest of people

1395
01:08:25,280 --> 01:08:27,680
being able to commute to one side of the lake,

1396
01:08:27,680 --> 01:08:30,640
to the other, without having to have a boat

1397
01:08:30,640 --> 01:08:33,320
or without having to, you know what I mean?

1398
01:08:33,320 --> 01:08:38,000
So, anyhow, well, I've got a little story here

1399
01:08:38,000 --> 01:08:41,440
before we go ahead and cap off this fine edition

1400
01:08:41,440 --> 01:08:43,200
of Two Douchebags and Microphone.

1401
01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:45,240
Are you ready for it, Rob?

1402
01:08:45,240 --> 01:08:46,360
Let's do it.

1403
01:08:46,360 --> 01:08:47,180
All right.

1404
01:08:47,180 --> 01:08:50,040
Well, a woman was wanting to make some jewelry,

1405
01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:53,160
but it didn't go out as planned.

1406
01:08:53,160 --> 01:08:55,760
Federal customs agents poo-pooed the plans

1407
01:08:55,760 --> 01:08:58,120
of an Iowa woman who wanted to make jewelry

1408
01:08:58,120 --> 01:09:00,120
from giraffe feces.

1409
01:09:00,120 --> 01:09:02,440
That's right, giraffe shit.

1410
01:09:02,440 --> 01:09:04,400
She picked up on a trip. Oh my God.

1411
01:09:04,400 --> 01:09:07,480
She picked up a trip, on a trip to Kenya

1412
01:09:07,480 --> 01:09:10,400
and brought back to the US in her luggage.

1413
01:09:10,400 --> 01:09:12,280
So all her clothes and everything

1414
01:09:12,280 --> 01:09:14,400
was rolling around with this camel shit.

1415
01:09:16,400 --> 01:09:18,800
The woman declared the small box of feces

1416
01:09:18,800 --> 01:09:21,520
when she was selected to have her belongings

1417
01:09:21,520 --> 01:09:25,200
inspected upon arriving in the Minneapolis-St. Paul airport

1418
01:09:25,200 --> 01:09:28,400
on September 29th, according to a US customs

1419
01:09:28,400 --> 01:09:30,820
and border protection official.

1420
01:09:30,820 --> 01:09:33,680
The woman who was not identified told officials

1421
01:09:33,680 --> 01:09:36,280
she planned to use the waste to make a necklace

1422
01:09:36,280 --> 01:09:40,560
as she had done in the past with moose shit.

1423
01:09:40,560 --> 01:09:43,560
So have that little slice of crazy

1424
01:09:43,560 --> 01:09:45,840
to tide you guys over till the next podcast,

1425
01:09:45,840 --> 01:09:47,400
which will be tomorrow night.

1426
01:09:49,080 --> 01:09:51,960
Mark, I do not think you could have finished

1427
01:09:51,960 --> 01:09:55,000
this segment any other way.

1428
01:09:55,000 --> 01:09:55,840
Yes.

1429
01:09:55,840 --> 01:09:57,760
Talking about shit.

1430
01:10:01,040 --> 01:10:02,760
You're welcome, America.

1431
01:10:02,760 --> 01:10:03,680
You're welcome.

1432
01:10:03,680 --> 01:10:08,680
Rob, I think we're going to say goodbye.

1433
01:10:08,800 --> 01:10:09,800
Bye everybody.

1434
01:10:10,960 --> 01:10:12,680
Good night everybody.

1435
01:10:12,680 --> 01:10:13,520
Love you guys.

1436
01:10:13,520 --> 01:10:14,360
Thanks for listening.

1437
01:10:14,360 --> 01:10:15,280
Talk to you tomorrow night.

1438
01:10:15,280 --> 01:10:16,960
National Slapping Idiot Day.

1439
01:10:16,960 --> 01:10:18,840
Everybody watch out, it's coming.

1440
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:20,760
Hey, where did they go?

1441
01:10:20,760 --> 01:10:22,160
Where are the douche bags?

1442
01:10:22,160 --> 01:10:23,000
Hmm.

1443
01:10:23,000 --> 01:10:26,000
Oh my God, someone took a dump in the corner.

1444
01:10:26,000 --> 01:10:26,840
Oh geez.

1445
01:10:28,080 --> 01:10:29,400
Glad they're gone.

1446
01:10:29,400 --> 01:10:31,360
Let's just hope they don't come back.

1447
01:10:31,360 --> 01:10:33,080
Man, that smells.

1448
01:10:35,680 --> 01:10:37,280
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

1449
01:10:37,280 --> 01:10:38,120
I'm sorry.

1450
01:10:38,120 --> 01:10:38,960
I'm sorry.

1451
01:10:38,960 --> 01:10:39,800
I'm sorry.

1452
01:10:39,800 --> 01:10:40,640
I'm sorry.

1453
01:10:40,640 --> 01:10:41,480
I'm sorry.

1454
01:10:41,480 --> 01:10:42,320
I'm sorry.

1455
01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:43,160
I'm sorry.

1456
01:10:43,160 --> 01:10:44,000
I'm sorry.

1457
01:10:44,000 --> 01:10:44,840
I'm sorry.

1458
01:10:44,840 --> 01:10:45,680
I'm sorry.

1459
01:10:45,680 --> 01:10:46,520
I'm sorry.

1460
01:10:46,520 --> 01:10:47,360
I'm sorry.

1461
01:10:47,360 --> 01:10:48,200
I'm sorry.

1462
01:10:48,200 --> 01:10:49,200
I'm sorry.

1463
01:10:49,200 --> 01:10:50,100
I'm sorry.

1464
01:10:50,100 --> 01:10:50,940
I'm sorry.

1465
01:10:50,940 --> 01:10:51,780
I'm sorry.

1466
01:10:51,780 --> 01:10:52,820
I'm sorry.

1467
01:10:52,820 --> 01:10:53,720
I'm sorry.

1468
01:10:53,720 --> 01:10:55,520
I'm sorry.

1469
01:10:55,520 --> 01:10:56,480
I'm sorry.