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Live from the historic river market in downtown Kansas City, Missouri, from the crystal blue

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waters of the Missouri River, it's Two Douchebags and a Microphone Podcast.

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As much fun as an electric can opener to the scrotum, Two Douchebags and a Microphone.

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And now, deep thoughts with Mark.

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Let's see here, a package of 8 hot dogs, a package of 10 hot dog buns.

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I would have to buy 10 packs of hot dogs and 8 packs of buns to even it out.

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Should I buy them at once?

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Should I freeze them?

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Or just continue to zigzag them and hope for the best?

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I hate adulting.

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Alright, Two Douchebags and a Microphone on Mark.

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And I'm up.

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Alright, well like I mentioned before, we have a Dear Douchebags, so...

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Awesome.

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Alright, I have an interesting problem and it is...

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Okay, let me start off.

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Dear Douchebags, I have an interesting problem and it has become quite annoying.

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My roommate in the apartment we share loves to take my snacks and I purchase myself and

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need half of them only to load me half with bite marks in it.

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This is gross.

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Please help me.

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Signed, Don't Eat My Candy in West Gandy.

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West Gandy is a very famous highway in the Tampa area in Florida.

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So if they...

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Yeah, yeah.

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Okay.

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So, alright, West Gandy, we have a few suggestions for you.

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Like I said before, and I think Rob will definitely vouch for this, right?

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You know what I'm getting at, right?

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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If you want to live a happy life, do the exact opposite of what we tell you to do.

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That's all we basically got, right?

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So us giving this advice, we already told you ahead of time, we're horrible, horrible

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advice people and we give people horrible decisions to do.

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So you know what?

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People still write in and still want answers so we're going to provide you with them in

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an entertainment fashion but we already tell you that we're going to give you horrible

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advice and you shouldn't follow it.

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So...

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Yeah, because Trust is still going to be laughing the whole time.

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Yes.

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Yeah, when you step right in the mousetrap, we're going to be over there snickering and

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going, hey, hey, hey, hey, look at that.

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Did you see that, Rob?

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He's like, yeah, sure did.

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I'm going to be laughing as we're telling it.

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Me too.

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Number one, non-perishable snacks should be stored way up high.

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Purchase a grabber, you know those grabbers, and hide these as close to the ceiling as

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you can.

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And then, I mean, at least you'll see them reaching for it and you can like fucking say,

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hey, what are you doing?

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And if not, then they may not be able to get them if they don't have a grabber.

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You hide the grabber and they have a hard time trying to climb the walls to get your

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non-perishables.

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This next one I really like a lot, and I think this is the answer, although like I said,

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it's horrible advice.

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Put razor blades in all the bags of products.

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Yeah, you're going to ruin a couple bags of stuff with blood.

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Yes, we know this.

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But at least the lesson will be taught.

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The lesson will be out there.

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It's like, yeah, well, you know what?

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Yeah, you got blood everywhere and your hands all cut up.

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Now why is that?

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That is because you stole my shit.

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You know how you keep your hands from being all cut up and bleeding?

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By not stealing my shit.

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Exactly.

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Yeah.

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I think that's a great lesson.

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And you're doing them a fiber knife too, right?

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That's solid right there, man.

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That is solid.

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That is gold, guys.

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That's gold.

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Number three, take seaweed and kale packages and hide the good stacks in them, even by

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one of those heat pressers so you can seal them up and they look unopened.

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So if that dumbass likes kale and seaweed, then you know what?

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I mean, you're fucked because they're going to break into them and they're going to see

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like, I don't know, Hershey's and fucking Reese's and stuff.

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And then they're going to go to town on your stacks.

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But since they do like the good stuff- And they eat the seaweed and kale move.

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Yes.

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That's what I was getting ready to get at.

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If they start chowing on that, that is your cue that you're living with a psychopath,

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a follower, not a leader, and just a fucking another drone, just a mouth breathing moron,

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and you are to leave there right now.

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I mean, if you see them stacking on seaweed and kale, nothing good will ever come of that.

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And remember that.

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Go, okay, my association with this dullard is over.

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All right, number four, I like this one a lot too.

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Explosive die packs.

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You know, like they put in money.

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Oh, I love it.

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Yeah.

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I love it.

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This man is like, man, look, I found his Reese's.

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Oh yeah, boom.

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His face is all fucking red or blue or whatever color it is.

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You come over and go, hey, hey, hey, hey, what happened, man?

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How come you look like a smurf?

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What am I talking about?

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No, no, no, no, no, no, really.

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Why do you look like a smurf?

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Oh, no, let me tell you why you look like a smurf.

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Because you keep stealing my shit.

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Remember the other time when you started bleeding?

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Yeah.

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Why did you start bleeding?

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Because you kept stealing my shit.

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Why do you look like a smurf?

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Because you keep stealing my shit.

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You want to quit looking like a smurf?

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Quit stealing my shit.

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Number five, oh, I love this one.

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Have a briefcase labeled anal sex toys.

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If they're perishable snacks, like ice cream or something, put those ice packs in the briefcase.

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If not, then just store your goodies in there.

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If they look through a briefcase labeled anal sex toys, that is the best warning you can

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ever get.

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Move immediately.

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Move immediately.

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If they are going to look through your briefcase that says anal sex toys, they are never going

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to be trusted.

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You can't close your eyes around them.

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You can't trust them around your animals.

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You can't trust them around family members.

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They are creepy psychopaths and you are to leave immediately and that is your clue.

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So anyhow, let's-

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It puts the lotion on the skin.

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Or it gets the anal sex toys again.

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I don't know.

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Anyhow, now we point our fingers at Rob.

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Rob, start your tap dancing.

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You are the dancing monkey of this show right now.

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What does that mean exactly?

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Take of it like the NFL's wire waiver.

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Okay.

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If and that's a big if Kaepernick decides to play in the CFL, the Lions have first stints

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on citing him for the 2024 season.

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Unfortunately Kaepernick appears to only be interested in the NFL.

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But if he really wants another shot just to play football, the CFL is a route he could

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take.

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Wow.

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Wake up Colin.

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Somebody wants to give you a chance.

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You know what?

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Why wouldn't he take it man?

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And look, if he is still that good then that is going to give the other people maybe juice

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to sign him somewhere else.

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That is all he has been wanting is somebody to let him show himself.

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Now he has the opportunity.

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I don't know how valid he is going to be in the NFL because here is the deal.

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Unless he is extraordinarily like a Mahomes or something like that, he is not going to

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garner a lot of interest because of the sideshow that comes with him.

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He never was a Mahomes.

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Well I know but I am saying if he was, unless he has a talent like that, no one is going

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to touch you.

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And the reason no one is going to touch you is because of all the sideshows, all the negative

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publicity it brings.

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Exactly.

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Go to Canada.

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Somebody in Canada wants you.

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Yeah go ahead.

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Yeah go ahead man.

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Be our guest.

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Have fun.

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Good luck.

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So.

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We are going to have a great time.

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We are going to have a great time.

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We are going to have a great time.

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We are going to have a great time.

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We are going to have a great time.

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We are going to have a great time.

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And then we can see what you can do.

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Yeah then if anybody still has interest in you they can reach out to you and go hey I

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saw you play.

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So okay here Rob I have a list of the top websites for sale, the top as in money websites,

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how much they cost.

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Alright.

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Okay.

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Number nine and ten on this list for fourteen and thirteen million.

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I don't know what the difference is.

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It might be dot com and net.

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It's the only thing I can think of is sex dot com and sex dot net probably.

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It commands fourteen and thirteen million and these are domain names that are for sale

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that are highly sought after.

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Okay.

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Number eight fund dot com.

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F-U-N-D. Fund dot com only costs nine point nine nine million in euros.

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So that's probably I don't know.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I don't know what it is.

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Anyhow I don't know why they listed that one in euros.

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I don't know why they listed it in euros either but whatever.

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Insure dot com at number seven is sixteen million.

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Number six at seventeen million is three sixty dot com.

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Number five garnering eighteen million internet dot com.

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That's interesting.

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Number four bringing in thirty million a pop for the domain name and it's available and

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it's widely sought after is voice dot com.

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Number three vacation rentals dot com at a whopping thirty five million.

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Number two insurance dot com at a whopping thirty five point six million.

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And number one car insurance dot com at almost fifty million a half a billion dollars forty

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nine point seven million a half a billion dollars for that website right there.

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So anyhow let's take a little break and I got some odd facts if you're ready to stomach

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some.

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Alright.

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Alright we will be right back here in just a couple minutes.

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Invisible ass paddling's new douche flavors and horrible pranks.

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What the fuck is wrong with these guys.

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Hello this is Satan.

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You might know me from my pet name inflation.

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I'm here to tell you that there's no better way to relax than listening to two douchebags

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and microphone by a nice warm fire at night.

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I said there are all the souls I burned that day.

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Enjoy.

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Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

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It's strange insults from an alien.

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Real hilarity.

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Mary your grandmother always intruded your thoughts at the last minute that you are masturbating.

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Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

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It's strange insults from an alien.

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Real hilarity.

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Your IQ isn't even room temperature.

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Alright two douchebags and microphone on mark.

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And I'm Rob.

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Okay I have some odd facts for you that sound good.

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Sounds awesome.

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Okay good.

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Do you know that Australia is wider than the moon?

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Yeah.

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Headphones can increase the bacteria in your ears.

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I knew that.

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Next odd fact.

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Scotland chose the unicorn as its national animal.

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Huh.

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Okay.

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I didn't know that.

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I didn't either until now.

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Did you know?

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Avocados are not vegetables.

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I guess they're a fruit.

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I guess they'd have to be a fruit wouldn't they?

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Oh.

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What?

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Yeah.

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They've got a seed in it.

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Oh okay.

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Good idea.

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Yep.

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I didn't.

257
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Yeah now I remember.

258
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:13,840
Yeah I do remember that now.

259
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:15,640
Did you know?

260
00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:19,120
You probably eat bugs in your sleep.

261
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:22,520
I didn't know but I kind of figured.

262
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:23,720
Only makes sense doesn't it?

263
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:27,160
I don't even think anybody wants to even think about it honestly.

264
00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:30,960
Nah not really.

265
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,400
Did you know?

266
00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:36,200
The Eiffel Tower gets taller in the summer.

267
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:40,800
No I didn't.

268
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:43,640
It must be something about, I don't know.

269
00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:45,800
I'll have to look at one up too.

270
00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:48,920
Now I'm taking this website's word for it.

271
00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:52,640
I didn't really cross check anything or nothing like that.

272
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:54,560
So I probably should have.

273
00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:56,720
So if this is wrong I'm sorry.

274
00:15:56,720 --> 00:16:01,480
You know what if nothing else maybe I'll give you a chuckle right?

275
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:02,480
Did you know that?

276
00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:03,480
Okay what?

277
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:04,480
I might look in on that.

278
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:05,480
Okay.

279
00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:13,200
Did you know that human teeth are the only part of the human body that can't heal itself?

280
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:17,520
I believe that.

281
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:20,720
It's because it's enamel porcelain.

282
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:25,720
Yeah it wouldn't have a way to regenerate.

283
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:26,720
It's just yeah.

284
00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:32,480
Did you know that Bert and Ernie's names came from a Christmas movie?

285
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:39,320
Can't say I did.

286
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:49,080
Did you know that Switzerland prohibits the ownership of just one guinea pig?

287
00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:50,360
I guess they get lonely really.

288
00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:54,960
I did read an article where they get really lonely and it's like really kind of torturing

289
00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:58,480
them to be alone.

290
00:16:58,480 --> 00:17:00,800
So okay so they're good with shit about guinea pigs over there.

291
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:02,920
Good for them.

292
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:10,880
Alright did you know that tigers have striped skin?

293
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:11,880
No I didn't.

294
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:15,880
I didn't either.

295
00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:23,760
Interesting did you know a shrimp's heart is in its head?

296
00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:25,280
I think I did know that one.

297
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,280
I actually think I did.

298
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:27,280
Yeah that I did know.

299
00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:28,280
That I did know.

300
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:33,320
Did you know we are more creative in the shower?

301
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:40,200
I believe that because I'm all off and dry off and jot down some ideas for the show.

302
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:43,640
It's just because to me the shower creates an environment like that.

303
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:44,640
Do you know what I'm talking about?

304
00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:47,640
That's where you feel more relaxed.

305
00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:53,360
Yeah yeah the water hitting your head and just kind of relaxing you.

306
00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:57,000
Yeah I come up with some good shit and I gotta immediately run out and put it in my phone

307
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,920
real quick so I don't forget it you know.

308
00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:01,280
Yeah.

309
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:05,120
So I can definitely believe that.

310
00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:10,840
Did you know that sloths can hold their breath longer than dolphins?

311
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:13,520
No I didn't.

312
00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:16,320
I found that interesting.

313
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:23,720
But then again I would probably have no way of knowing that anyhow you know so.

314
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:29,240
Did you know that fruit loops are all the same flavor even though they're different

315
00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:34,000
colors?

316
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,280
I've heard that.

317
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:39,880
Yep.

318
00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:47,160
Did you know Venus is the only planet that spins clockwise?

319
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:51,920
Uh huh.

320
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:54,840
I didn't know that either so.

321
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:58,480
Anyhow I got a question for you.

322
00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,880
Do you feel like going into the hairy asshole Olympics or do you want to do them on the

323
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:02,880
next podcast?

324
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:07,880
That's totally up to you.

325
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:13,440
You know what let's do that on the next podcast because when we do two of them we can do yours

326
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:17,680
and mine or mine and then yours or whatever however and we can do it consecutively.

327
00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,880
Yeah get them all together.

328
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:24,760
So that's kind of what I'm thinking do you have something that you want to go into?

329
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:30,920
Uh let me switch views here real quick.

330
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:31,920
I smell bacon.

331
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:35,800
No wait it's just Mark sweating.

332
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:39,400
Two tool bags and a socket wrench will be right back.

333
00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:40,400
Next up.

334
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:41,400
Things overhead in hell.

335
00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:42,400
And hell will be the main course forever.

336
00:19:42,400 --> 00:19:51,440
Our constant pursuit for a real knee slapper.

337
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:54,280
It's strange insults from an alien.

338
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:55,280
Real hilarity.

339
00:19:55,280 --> 00:20:16,920
One as useful as a cannon but false.

340
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:17,920
I'm working dude.

341
00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:18,920
Okay that's fine.

342
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,920
Well I have something I can go into if you want.

343
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,840
Yeah yeah jump in real quick.

344
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:25,840
Okay.

345
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:26,840
Alright.

346
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:34,240
When it comes to ordering at McDonald's there are a few secret menu items that customers

347
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:35,800
can indulge in.

348
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:40,200
So long as the fast food restaurants employees are willing to work with them.

349
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:44,800
Ordering these items is often simple as just changing an ingredient or two on a classic

350
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:45,960
menu item.

351
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:50,360
For example if you're craving a grilled cheese from McDonald's you can order a simple cheese

352
00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:54,600
burger removing everything but the bun and cheese.

353
00:20:54,600 --> 00:21:00,960
One secret breakfast sandwich that can be ordered from the fast food chain is the Chicken

354
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:03,240
Court on Blue McMuffin.

355
00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:08,080
The breakfast food starts with a base of the standard egg McMuffin components but you'll

356
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:10,640
need a request to add one ingredient.

357
00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:11,640
A chicken patty.

358
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:17,560
That little bit of extra protein adds some extra flavor to the sandwich while also mimicking

359
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:22,640
the taste of the hearty dinner dish it's named for.

360
00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:28,720
Next to the combo of chicken, cheese and Canadian bacon.

361
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:33,360
To order the secret breakfast sandwich that is pretty cool I never even thought of that

362
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:34,360
ever.

363
00:21:34,360 --> 00:21:36,200
You'll need to start off by ordering.

364
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:38,400
So here's how you do it exactly.

365
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:40,400
Start off by ordering the egg McMuffin.

366
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:45,280
The order consists of an egg, Canadian bacon and a slice of American cheese all stacked

367
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:48,720
on a buttered English muffin but not buttered sausage.

368
00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:54,800
Then you'll just need to request the addition of a chicken patty on the sandwich or if you're

369
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:59,880
craving something with a little bit of a kick to it you can request a chicken patty used

370
00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:02,800
in a hot and spicy McChicken sandwich.

371
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:07,160
The secret menu item has been compared to Chicken Court on Blue thanks to the breaded

372
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,040
chicken portion of the sandwich.

373
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:13,240
A traditional Court on Blue is made from chicken breast filled with cheese, ham, and breaded

374
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:16,600
and cooked.

375
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:22,480
The McMuffin version mimics that through adding the breaded chicken patty through the pork

376
00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:26,880
and cheese are stacked alongside it not cooked inside it.

377
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:31,520
Still since all the components are there the flavors could be pretty comparable.

378
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:36,520
So that's pretty cool I've never even thought about that ever but then again I don't go

379
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:41,200
to McDonald's enough I guess to really know that you know what I mean.

380
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:45,200
But it is cool if you're ever getting a pinch I could probably do something like that and

381
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:53,560
just come up with a Chicken Court on Blue what rip off I guess or something.

382
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:58,520
Whatever you want to call it.

383
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,920
So oops I'm dropping everything.

384
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:04,440
So Rob did you find the store you wanted to get to?

385
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:09,200
Yeah I got a little something here.

386
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:10,200
Okay.

387
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:20,320
In Missouri down in the Markham Plain Forest there's a place called Greer Springs.

388
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,320
What is it?

389
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:24,880
It's one of the few Missouri Springs that I haven't visited yet.

390
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:30,840
They're on my radar now after I saw hikers show what it's like and you gotta watch the

391
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:33,160
video man it's beautiful.

392
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:36,160
What is the name of it again?

393
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:46,680
The Missouri Department of Conservation calls Greer Springs one of the most significant

394
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:54,360
natural features in Missouri and they're not kidding it's located near the 11 Point River

395
00:23:54,360 --> 00:24:02,840
which is down just past Mountain View down around Winona.

396
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:07,840
I know where it's at Mountain View I know where Mountain View and Winona is at.

397
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:10,600
It's like down kind of south of there.

398
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:16,200
The water and pouring from Greer Springs is so very clear.

399
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:26,240
The state's website says over 210 million gallons of water travels every day.

400
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:27,240
Cool.

401
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:33,520
That's a lot of water doing 210 million gallons a day.

402
00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:35,520
That's beautiful.

403
00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:36,520
Wow.

404
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:38,520
I gotta go down there.

405
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,520
I really do.

406
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:41,520
Okay.

407
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:42,840
Yeah I would too.

408
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:46,760
That sounds fantastic to me.

409
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:51,880
There's a strange one.

410
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:52,880
Okay.

411
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:55,880
That's strange.

412
00:24:55,880 --> 00:25:00,560
A Massingale woman which I'm not sure where that's at.

413
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:01,560
Optons County.

414
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:02,560
Optons County.

415
00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:03,560
I don't know.

416
00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:09,760
Claiming to be from Jupiter was arrested for public intoxication.

417
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:11,800
Oh okay.

418
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:19,760
A Taco Bell employee told police a woman later identified as Lindsay Crenshaw was talking

419
00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:21,760
out of her mind.

420
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:29,040
She found Crenshaw standing behind the Taco Bell continuously talking to herself and sweating

421
00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:30,040
profusely.

422
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:31,040
Oh wow.

423
00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:36,840
She eventually tried to run from police that did not comply with officer demands to stop.

424
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:43,080
Crenshaw eventually caught up to officers eventually caught up to Crenshaw and placed

425
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:44,080
her under arrest.

426
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:48,960
She was charged with public intoxication flinging police.

427
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:49,960
Wow.

428
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:56,960
She actually claims to be from Jupiter.

429
00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:58,960
Wow.

430
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:03,280
Yeah okay.

431
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:09,080
That's a 104.1 WIKY.

432
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:10,080
Okay.

433
00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:12,320
Where is that at?

434
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:13,320
I've got a little story here.

435
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:14,320
Am I finding this interesting?

436
00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:15,320
Yeah please do.

437
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:16,320
Please do.

438
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:17,320
Okay that's cool.

439
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:19,400
I'm going downhill man.

440
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:20,400
I know I can tell that.

441
00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:21,400
You're starting to...

442
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:24,400
We can wrap this up here pretty soon okay?

443
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:25,400
Okay.

444
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:26,400
Alright.

445
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:27,400
Okay.

446
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:28,400
Um real quick.

447
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:33,920
Few guitarists as qualified as Brad Gillis to voice an opinion concerning which Ozzy

448
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:35,920
Osbourne's guitarist was better.

449
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:46,680
Jakey Lee or Zach Wild is you know it's argued but whenever you get someone like Gillis who

450
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:52,680
filled in after Randy Rhoades passed away he would be a valid guy to ask because he

451
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:55,240
knows all of them.

452
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:59,280
So Gillis was asked to choose between Lee and Wild.

453
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:02,000
Which one did he think was the better one?

454
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:07,640
He goes he said I gotta tell you man no more tears that song is so awesome.

455
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:12,880
Him as in Zach doing the slide on there and getting the squeals of his guitar I mean that

456
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:14,120
blew me away.

457
00:27:14,120 --> 00:27:19,760
Now when it goes to that orchestration section in the middle that's okay but it seems like

458
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:22,080
it didn't really have to go there.

459
00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:23,880
But his playing is awesome.

460
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:27,800
That's one of my favorite Ozzy songs of all time.

461
00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:30,360
Except for the first two records with Randy.

462
00:27:30,360 --> 00:27:36,720
Those are my two favorite but no more tears is third but close.

463
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:37,720
So I gotta go with Zach.

464
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,480
I met him a few times.

465
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:40,800
I'm out with him.

466
00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:42,160
Nicest guy in the world.

467
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,160
Jake he's a great player man.

468
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:45,720
Those are great records.

469
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:53,000
But that tone and that stuff along with his great solos and the slide work that Zach did

470
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:56,760
is just awesome and I gotta go with Zach.

471
00:27:56,760 --> 00:28:02,200
But one of those shows co-host Eddie Trunk made a valid point after Gillis shared his

472
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:05,600
opinion concerning Jake.

473
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:12,760
He said in the Imagine department also he said that Jake beats Zach in his look and

474
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:15,640
his rock star and all that.

475
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:17,080
It depends on how you look at it.

476
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:23,280
I think what Eddie Trunk was talking about was the rock star back then with the curly

477
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:30,760
long hair and the short sleeve shirt and the eyeliner and the leather pants and all that.

478
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:38,640
I think I know what he's saying is it really kind of fit Ozzy's kind of glamish look then.

479
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:44,120
So I get that and Zach now looks like cousin it.

480
00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,080
Zach looks like a rock star too.

481
00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:50,120
I would agree with Brad Gillis 100%.

482
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:53,200
I think Zach is much better than Jake.

483
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:58,280
Jake is excellent and I love a lot of music that he's done and especially music with Ozzy

484
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:02,360
but I think that Zach is just a whole other level.

485
00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:08,000
So Zach is a breed on his own.

486
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:18,280
Alrighty so I think we are probably going to go into a best of segment here because

487
00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:25,560
Rob is running down and I don't want to kill Rob and he's got work in the morning so we

488
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:30,040
got a couple of best of stuff lined up.

489
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:40,160
We might do Babble Snatch, we could do the prank phone call bits that I did.

490
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:45,160
I have some other stories that I got to find, some of Mark's famous prank stuff that we

491
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:50,960
could do but I assure you guys stay tuned and listen to the next bit because it's going

492
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:51,960
to be funny.

493
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:57,880
So anyhow Rob thank you for joining me, everybody thank you for listening.

494
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:59,360
We'll be back on it.

495
00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:00,920
We'll be back on it.

496
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,160
Yep everybody have a great night.

497
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:04,160
Love you guys.

498
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:05,160
Good night.

499
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:06,160
Love you.

500
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:11,680
Please remember to go to Cole's dressing room, wait five minutes and scream, hey there's

501
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:19,080
no toilet paper in here.

502
00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:24,240
Clean up, blast, from the past.

503
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:30,600
This is where we take old shows and incorporate them into new shows because you f***s refuse

504
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:32,080
to go get it.

505
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:39,120
Have I ever told you about my prank phone call deal that I used to do?

506
00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:40,120
No.

507
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:45,200
Well this was the old quick trip in Belvedere, the one right off the highway, right off of

508
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:50,720
71 or 49 or whatever at 155th street down there in that little pit there right off the

509
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:51,720
exit ramp.

510
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:56,200
There used to be a quick trip and one day I'm like in there getting a soda or some shit

511
00:30:56,200 --> 00:31:02,160
right and I noticed the phone rang, is this probably a drug deal or something?

512
00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:04,360
And some guy jumps out of his car and starts answering.

513
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:08,000
I'm like huh, they know those things had numbers.

514
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:11,720
Not only did I not know they have numbers, I didn't realize that people f***ing answer

515
00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:12,720
them.

516
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:17,200
And the idea of calling into a pay phone didn't occur to me until I saw someone do it on a

517
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:18,200
TV show.

518
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:19,200
I was like what?

519
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:20,200
You can do that?

520
00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:25,640
I thought it was just one way you got on there and said hey I'm down here at the quick trip

521
00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:34,960
man whenever you want to come down I got the pet cage and the rubbers.

522
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:40,240
So anyhow I walk over there and I get a pen from the guy in the quick trip and wrote down

523
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:41,240
the numbers.

524
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:46,680
There was like three of them and they're like you know in a little semi circle.

525
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:50,960
Back in the days, I mean like you mentioned the other day how nasty that was.

526
00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:54,640
Some guy gets up there and starts spitting all over the phone talking and then you go

527
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,200
picking up right after.

528
00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:59,760
Jam it right up to the hole in your face that you eat through.

529
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:05,200
Now when I think about it I cringe.

530
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:11,200
So anyhow it is probably a dirt bag from Belvedere anyhow with no teeth.

531
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:16,520
So anyhow I get these numbers down and anyhow one day I'm over at my friend Davies and we're

532
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:19,080
bored and I go hey man I got something we can do.

533
00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:20,080
What's that?

534
00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:21,080
See these three numbers?

535
00:32:21,080 --> 00:32:22,080
Yeah.

536
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:24,240
They're the number two the pay phones in Belvedere quick trip.

537
00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:25,240
Oh really?

538
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:28,760
Let's just call up and fuck with people.

539
00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:29,760
Sure.

540
00:32:29,760 --> 00:32:30,760
Okay.

541
00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:34,240
So you know we call up and the first time it took a long time.

542
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:35,240
I don't think anyone was there.

543
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:36,240
Someone answered hello.

544
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:37,600
Oh you know this is the pay phone?

545
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:39,720
I go hey you know you're a dickhead.

546
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:42,440
You know just start screwing with them.

547
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,120
Yeah you're a piece of shit man.

548
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:45,800
Hey you know who I got right next to me?

549
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:46,800
Your mom.

550
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:47,800
Yeah.

551
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:48,800
You know people get pissed off.

552
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:51,000
Fuck you bitch and all this stuff.

553
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:54,320
So anyhow we call them up and harass them.

554
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:55,920
People get so fucking mad.

555
00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:57,840
You know we get them so mad they threaten to kill us.

556
00:32:57,840 --> 00:33:00,160
They're going to come over and we're like oh you're going to kill me when you don't

557
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:01,520
know where I'm at bitch.

558
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:08,880
You know this is before this is in maybe early 90s at the most late 80s whatever.

559
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,520
Somewhere in that time frame.

560
00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:14,480
And I mean it was just I mean we had nothing else to do so we'd call up and just get people

561
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:15,480
so mad.

562
00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:19,920
Davey used to do this farmer oppression and he used to tell the guy that his fucking goats

563
00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:25,560
were in his yard and he was mad or your fucking cattle trampled my fucking sheep you bitch.

564
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,480
I don't have no farm.

565
00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:28,760
Yeah you do you son of a bitch.

566
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,880
I know this is you Mr. Johnson.

567
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:35,200
You get your ass over here and you get my dead fucking sheep and you better fucking

568
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:36,200
bury it.

569
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:38,480
If you don't I'm going to come over there and I'm going to slap the stupid out of you

570
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,800
and that's going to take all day because you're pretty fucking stupid.

571
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:46,320
And he would just keep railing on him and the people get so mad and argue about I don't

572
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:47,480
have a farm.

573
00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:50,400
I ain't got no farm you dumb son of a bitch.

574
00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:57,040
And he would just keep going ain't got no farm you dumb son of a bitch.

575
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:58,960
And these people get so mad.

576
00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:03,280
So anyhow one day I'm over there I'm like hmm you know it's starting to get boring.

577
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:05,160
People get mad and they hang up.

578
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:08,040
Then a lot of people just go fuck you you know and hang up.

579
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:09,440
The smarter ones do.

580
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:10,440
Yeah.

581
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:11,960
And although I question them answering a pay phone.

582
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,400
And everyone goes oh you know this is a pay phone don't you.

583
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,440
You know and it's like okay.

584
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:18,880
I heard that one before.

585
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:19,880
Alright hang on.

586
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:22,240
Oh yeah you're right I'm sorry.

587
00:34:22,240 --> 00:34:24,400
You know what do you do.

588
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:27,020
I noticed there's a white house right behind there.

589
00:34:27,020 --> 00:34:31,960
So anyhow I'm like hmm okay alright everyone always wants to know where I live at.

590
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:35,720
I guess I'm going to live in that white house right behind the pay phone.

591
00:34:35,720 --> 00:34:39,560
So anyhow you know most people are just kind of like they hang up and they don't want to

592
00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:40,560
go to that white house.

593
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:45,400
This one guy that I was fucking with just constantly going hey you piece of shit man.

594
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:47,680
Yeah you just don't sound right without a dick in your mouth.

595
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:49,000
You sound completely different.

596
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,520
Hey you bald gargler.

597
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:53,120
And all this stuff man.

598
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:54,120
You smell like chode.

599
00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:57,160
And this guy is just getting fucking madder than he is.

600
00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:58,680
I'm going to beat the shit out of you.

601
00:34:58,680 --> 00:34:59,680
Where you at?

602
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:00,840
And I go you want to know where I'm at bitch?

603
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:01,840
Yeah.

604
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:03,000
Now over there look to your left.

605
00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:04,320
Oh no no not that left.

606
00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:05,320
The other left.

607
00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:06,320
The other one.

608
00:35:06,320 --> 00:35:08,520
Okay see that left?

609
00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:09,720
Over there.

610
00:35:09,720 --> 00:35:10,720
See that white house?

611
00:35:10,720 --> 00:35:12,640
I'm right here motherfucker.

612
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:13,640
I'm looking out the window.

613
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:16,760
I'm waiting for your fucking fat ass to come beat me up.

614
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:20,440
I'm going to smack the stupid out of you and I'm going to do it in front of everybody.

615
00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:23,760
I'm going to call people over to watch me smack the fuck out of you.

616
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:24,760
And this guy is getting mad.

617
00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:25,760
Oh you son of a bitch.

618
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:29,040
I'm going to fucking kill you.

619
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:30,660
And I'm pretty sure the guy went over there.

620
00:35:30,660 --> 00:35:32,000
He was so mad.

621
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,240
So he was so mad that he didn't even completely hang up.

622
00:35:34,240 --> 00:35:36,960
I heard it go click and then it fell on the ground.

623
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:40,480
So he didn't look back or nothing and anyhow I hear a car peeling out.

624
00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:44,000
So I don't know about that guy in that white house but I'm pretty sure he got in a pretty

625
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:45,000
good fight.

626
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:46,000
Yeah.

627
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:51,880
Oh he should look to the police blotter the next day.

628
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:54,160
Man in white house beaten to death by outrage.

629
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:58,400
There wasn't an internet so it was like one of those deals where you had to wait for one

630
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:05,360
of those little regional magazines like the South Side or whatever the Grandview Circle

631
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,520
or whatever the Grandview Dicks Mac or whatever.

632
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:12,800
One of those stupid little fucking mags to come out.

633
00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:14,040
South Side idiot.

634
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:15,040
Whatever.

635
00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:18,480
So hey I never did find out you know and I didn't want to know.

636
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:21,360
I was afraid someone might have got killed that whole scuff up you know.

637
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:22,360
But yeah.

638
00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:23,360
Could be.

639
00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:25,160
It was at the hands of entertainment so I justified it.

640
00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:26,160
Yeah.

641
00:36:26,160 --> 00:36:27,160
Yeah.

642
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:28,160
Were you briefly entertained?

643
00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:29,920
Oh I was entertained for a while.

644
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:33,960
I mean especially the guys that just continue to get mad.

645
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:37,880
They just continue to try to insult you and one up you without a brain.

646
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:38,880
Yeah.

647
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:42,240
And you continue like Davey just roll over so many insults on him.

648
00:36:42,240 --> 00:36:47,200
And they just keep getting madder and madder and go oh yeah fuck you.

649
00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:49,600
Oh my god you got me.

650
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:52,760
Oh you went through the F-bomb.

651
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:54,400
Oh someone get me some iced tea.

652
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:55,400
Oh my god.

653
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:56,840
Oh the pain.

654
00:36:56,840 --> 00:36:58,360
You know.

655
00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:03,640
And hey how so the final the finality was I used to call it down there and this is later

656
00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:06,440
I got bored with it and I went back to it.

657
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:08,920
And this chick answers.

658
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:12,920
And I started saying something you know just started blathering some sort of shit to try

659
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:13,920
to piss her off.

660
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:16,920
She goes Mark Wallace.

661
00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:18,400
Oops.

662
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:24,440
Who is this?

663
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:25,440
This is Danielle.

664
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:26,440
Oh fuck.

665
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:29,680
What are you doing calling a pay phone?

666
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:30,680
Long story.

667
00:37:30,680 --> 00:37:31,680
Hey she busted me.

668
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:35,480
That was the last time I called and I'm like fuck man.

669
00:37:35,480 --> 00:37:36,480
That's it man.

670
00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:37,480
No fun anymore.

671
00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:38,480
It's done.

672
00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:39,480
Yep.

673
00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:40,480
Cancel Christmas.

674
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:41,480
Pharmacy is closed.

675
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:42,480
Break.

676
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:43,480
Shit House.

677
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:44,480
Energy drink.

678
00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:45,480
That's right.

679
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:46,480
Break.

680
00:37:46,480 --> 00:37:47,480
Shit House.

681
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:48,480
Energy drink.

682
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:49,480
Make men feel good.

683
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:50,480
You want some balls?

684
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:51,480
You want some balls?

685
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:52,480
You want some balls?

686
00:37:52,480 --> 00:37:53,480
You want some balls?

687
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:54,480
You want some balls?

688
00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:55,480
You want some balls?

689
00:37:55,480 --> 00:37:56,480
You want some balls?

690
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:57,480
You want a fun shit up?

691
00:37:57,480 --> 00:37:58,480
You want a poor dump across America?

692
00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:00,380
Break Shit House is for you.

693
00:38:00,380 --> 00:38:05,520
Please enjoy Break Shit House Energy Drink Responsibly.

694
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,600
It's not readily available anywhere.

695
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:09,600
because of liability issues.

696
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:42,600
I'm in Belvedere, which isn't there now, it was knocked down, and then replaced way later by a quick trip.

697
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:53,600
But anyhow, I used to go in there all the time and, you know, go in there and buy sodas and shit and whatever, you know, rolling papers for my friends, not for me.

698
00:38:54,600 --> 00:38:56,600
And anyhow, you know, just shit like that.

699
00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:05,600
So anyhow, there's this guy in there, I don't know, I think he hated long hairs or something, but I noticed he was nice to everybody but me.

700
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:10,600
Like I'd be like third in line and, hey, how you know, the first guy, hey, Mr. Jones, how you doing?

701
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:17,600
Oh, man, yeah, nice weather. Hey, how's the kid? You know, next person. Hi, Loretta, how you doing?

702
00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:24,600
Oh, man, yeah, yeah, yeah, everything's going good, man. I got the old Taurus running really good. Yeah, yeah, come by, man.

703
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:26,600
The old Taurus.

704
00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:33,600
I come up there, 142. So how you doing? 142.

705
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:37,600
Okay, here you go. And I'm like, what the hell? How come this guy hates me?

706
00:39:38,600 --> 00:39:43,600
And every time I go in there, nicest pie to everybody but me, it's like, just like, I'd be 249.

707
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:47,600
So, weather's pretty nice out there. Thanks, bye.

708
00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:55,600
I'm a motherfucker. So he did this so many times and he just never talked to me. He wouldn't even like hardly look at me, you know.

709
00:39:55,600 --> 00:40:06,600
So, and I never did nothing to this fucker that I know of. You know, maybe someone said something like this guy said, you know, that you're a dick or maybe someone's screwing him like, hey, man, you think you got a nice ass.

710
00:40:07,600 --> 00:40:13,600
Whatever the fucking deal was, the guy was just a complete tool bag to me constantly. So I was like, hi, bitch.

711
00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:23,600
So I go home and I think about it. Okay. So I start calling up and I go, hey, you got any Babel snatch gum? What? Babel snatch?

712
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:32,600
Everybody, I mean, I bought it from there a couple of weeks ago. Stuff is fucking awesome, man. I'll tell you what, man, you know, talk to your manager about it.

713
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:37,600
Is this like a breath freshening gum? I don't, you know. Maybe a bubble gum?

714
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:45,600
I just came up with it and anyhow, the guy, he bent on it, you know, he was like, oh yeah, I'll check on it for you.

715
00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:57,600
Hey, thanks, man. I appreciate it. So anyhow, so I called back a little bit later. Yeah, someone called earlier, you know, and anyhow, I'm sure we have it here somewhere, but you know, I'll talk to my manager about it tonight.

716
00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:06,600
We'll see what we can do. So anyhow, I have a couple other people call it about Babel snatch gum and you know, and they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, we're, we're working on getting it in.

717
00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:16,600
Okay, you know, the regional manager, we called him and he said that he was going to work on getting it in here and, and I go, well, you know, I bought it the other day and it's just so good.

718
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:24,600
And they believe me, I go, man, this gum is just so great tasting. And he's like, it's Babel snatch, right? Yeah, Babel snatch. That's the name of it. Okay. All right.

719
00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:30,600
I would have loved to listen into the conversation when he's asking the regional manager about Babel snatch.

720
00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:40,600
Oh yeah. So, you know, anyhow, I called down there the next day and I go, Hey man, you know, you got that Babel snatch gum. You know, the guy's like, Oh, hang on, hang on. I think it's in, we just had a load. Hang on.

721
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:52,600
So anyhow, so the guy's like, you know, and this is the guy I hated, the Paul guy. So anyhow, he's like, yeah, hang on a second. So I hear him like, Hey, I'm going to go to the back there and it's in one of the boxes. I said it was coming in today.

722
00:41:52,600 --> 00:42:04,600
So, all right, no big deal. So I hear him go back. I hear some rustling and a couple of people come in and then he stops. He goes up there. Oh yeah. It'd be 1242. Okay. Thank you. Have a good day. And then he helps someone else. I hear him go back again.

723
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:09,600
I hear him rustling through some more boxes. Meanwhile, I'm laughing my ass off.

724
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:25,600
Anyhow, this guy, he like for like 20 minutes is looking for Babel snatch gum. So, anyhow, so like finally, like a half hour later, he comes back. He goes, man, he goes, look, I know we're going to have it in by the end of the day. I talked to my manager.

725
00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:37,600
Okay. All right, man. All right. I'll come in at night and I'll get some gum and save some for me, man. Okay. My name's Billy. I'll be in. Okay. Okay. All right. I'll save you some Babel snatch gum. No problem.

726
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:47,600
So a couple of hours later, I called up and I talked to the manager. Manager's like, yeah, yeah, I ordered some a couple of days ago and it should be in. If it's not in right now, it's going to be in by the end of the day. I guarantee you.

727
00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:59,600
So I don't know how the hell they ordered it because there's, there was no such thing as Babel snatch gum. I made the shut up and all of a sudden, I mean, everybody wanted this fucking Babel snatch gum and it never did exist.

728
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:26,600
Matter of fact, this prank got so good to where I ended up. This is, you know, in the eighties before digital cameras even, let alone, you know, there are phone cameras and all the, you know, Photoshop and everything. No internet. No, we had to like cut stuff out of wrappers and stuff and make a fake Babel snatch gum and take an old fashioned, fashioned, like a Polaroid type of picture. I forgot what it was. It could be one of those little bat box cameras back then. Probably the only thing I could afford to do was to make a fake Babel snatch gum.

729
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:29,600
And I got a box cameras back then. Probably the only thing I could afford, you know.

730
00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:41,600
Hey, we actually took a picture of the Babel snatch gum and a guy went in there and he goes, Hey man, I need this. And the guy's like, I know, I know, I know, man. We're working on getting it in. It's hard to get, man. Everybody wants this Babel snatch gum.

731
00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:47,600
So anyhow, I guess the whole moral of the story is, is don't be a dick to me because then I'll do something like that.

732
00:43:47,600 --> 00:44:01,600
And even now to this day, I'll have a couple of people on my friends list every now and then like send me a little message. They'll go Babel snatch. I'm like, ah, what time I was like working up in fucking New York or something.

733
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:09,600
And all of a sudden I get a ding and like I'm on top of this fucking skyscraper. They're putting in glass and I look down and it says Babel snatch.

734
00:44:09,600 --> 00:44:17,600
I'm like, fuck. I hope they're dying this glass about ready to fall and kill a hundred people.

735
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:25,600
They recover your body and they look at your phone and well, the last text you received said Babel snatch. We better look into this.

736
00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:30,600
By some guy named dirtbag.

737
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:41,600
So anyhow, that is my elaborate prank section of this unless we throw some more in there. But anyhow, Babel snatch. Never forget it.

738
00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:50,600
This name lives on. I had a request from my friend Lona that listens to this podcast and will probably listen to this.

739
00:44:50,600 --> 00:45:02,600
But anyhow, some of the some she's going way back with this elaborate prank and I'd forgotten all about it actually. And there's like there's more on this level specifically that I can tell you about.

740
00:45:03,600 --> 00:45:10,600
This is in general, this elaborate prank and anyhow, it's a really, really good vicious line of events.

741
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:20,600
Anyhow, kind of good. Going to go into some humor now. We know we've done some serious stuff. But anyhow, my great buddy Davey, I think a lot of people know him.

742
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:29,600
I know Davey. Oh yeah. See. So there we go. Jesse knows Davey. Three out of three. Cindy knows Davey. Four out of four. Val knows Davey. Five out of five.

743
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:47,600
Okay. Well, everybody in the whole world knows him evidently. So anyhow, you know, when we were teenagers, every summer his parents would go to Truman Lake and they'd take their camper there and they'd be gone pretty much from Memorial weekend to Labor Day weekend.

744
00:45:47,600 --> 00:46:00,600
So, you know, good two and a half months stretch, something like that. Yeah. Sometimes it was stretching to three, depending on how they felt, you know. And so anyhow, this meant one thing. Party house.

745
00:46:00,600 --> 00:46:17,600
Yeah. So, you know, Davey and I had some evil tricks that we like to play on the people, you know. The people that all partied at the house for a while, they were all in on the gag because they probably hadn't happened to them before.

746
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:30,600
Yeah. So, you know, so anyhow, you know, they were a victim at one point and then after they got through with the hurt and the embarrassment and the bruises, they're like, okay, all right, well, it's time for someone else.

747
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:37,600
So, you know, new guys that would come to the house didn't know about this, but the people that were there for a while, they knew they knew they were safe.

748
00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:49,600
So, anyhow, one of the things that we would do is, you know, we'd all be getting trashed, but anyone that wasn't at Davey's house before would not know this. There was a refrigerator in the back room that contained all the sodas.

749
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:58,600
All the Dr. Peppers, all the Cokes, all that, you know, the Sprites, what have you, Mountain Dews, Dr. Peppers were all in the back fridge. Yeah.

750
00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:12,600
And the front fridge was full of useful stuff like food and stuff like that, okay. So, anyhow, you know, we'd all be getting smashed and anyhow, you know, someone would wake up and they'd be parched.

751
00:47:13,600 --> 00:47:22,600
So, they would look for something that they could drink and also have caffeine. We didn't believe in coffee back then. Coffee didn't exist. It was all soda coffee. Yep.

752
00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:34,600
So, what we would do is we would take a can of soda and we would, you know, open it up and drink it or, you know, throw it out or whatever. Probably drink it most likely. We weren't that stupid. And we would piss in it.

753
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:51,600
So, we would take this can of open Dr. Pepper, let's say, and with all the content gone, we would piss in it and then we'd stick it back in the fridge. Ouch. Well, like I said, the people who've been there for a while, they knew about it.

754
00:47:51,600 --> 00:48:03,600
The new people did not. Don't drink from the front fridge. Drink from the back fridge. Well, the people who've been there for a while would be like, uh, uh, uh, I ain't getting this one right here. Uh, uh, uh, uh. Oh my God.

755
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:17,600
I'm going to go get this one in the back room. So, anyhow, you know, it would usually end up like this. We'd hear a scream and some cussing and some threats and stuff like that.

756
00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:24,600
And then we'd come down there and everyone would, like, no one would know who did it. We're like, what? Are you fucking joking me?

757
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:36,600
And then, you know, go over there if they didn't, like, throw it against the wall or stuff and smell it. Oh my God, it is piss. Hey, we're going to find out who did this, man. I'm sorry.

758
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:46,600
You have already made the excuse, like, well, old man, I was collecting this urine sample for my dog. I got to take him to the vet later. So sorry, I should have marked it.

759
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:52,600
The only thing I had was a Dr. Pepper can and you happened to be the purse sucker that went in on the conversation.

760
00:48:53,600 --> 00:48:56,600
You know how tough it was to get that dog to pee into that Dr. Pepper can?

761
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:01,600
Now it's ruined. And it had to be a day old. My dog's going to die because you drank his piss.

762
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:07,600
Well, anyhow. You drink the dog's piss and the dog dies. That's pretty bad.

763
00:49:08,600 --> 00:49:12,600
Yeah. I can't get the sample to the vet in time and he's definitely ill. Thanks a lot, fuckface.

764
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:20,600
Look at this. Wouldn't it be fantastic if... I tend to like these a lot. Oh, I love this. I think this is going to be a great news segment.

765
00:49:21,600 --> 00:49:28,600
Alright. Okay. If every time a person farted, they impulsively would have to look at their ass like dogs do.

766
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:34,600
That would be awesome. You'd be in a crowd of people and see several of them whip around and look at their own butts.

767
00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:41,600
Oh shit, I forgot that happens now. Or no one could lie about who farted.

768
00:49:42,600 --> 00:49:45,600
They'd go, no, you're a liar. I saw you look at your ass.

769
00:49:48,600 --> 00:49:54,600
Oh, that'd be great. Then live on TV, you know, like someone's talking and all of a sudden one just escapes.

770
00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:57,600
They have to look back at their ass with an inquisitive look.

771
00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:04,600
How many times have you seen that on reality shows, game shows, political debates?

772
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:13,600
Because sometimes whenever you get excited, one cuts loose. So you can be trying to hold it in, it just accidentally slips out.

773
00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:20,600
Then automatically you've got to look at your ass like... with that inquisitive look like, who's doing that?

774
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:23,600
That would be so cool.

775
00:50:25,600 --> 00:50:36,600
Next one on the list. Every time a politician lies, he slaps himself in the mouth hard and will continue to slap himself until the truth actually comes out.

776
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:41,600
I like that one. So he can't do anything. He just keeps hitting himself in the mouth hard.

777
00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:44,600
I think we very quickly have no politicians left.

778
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:49,600
Oh yeah, we very quickly have a lot of bloody lips and people just not saying anything.

779
00:50:50,600 --> 00:50:51,600
Teeth on the floor.

780
00:50:52,600 --> 00:50:57,600
Yeah, oh yeah. Wouldn't that be excellent just to watch? You'd be hoping a politician lied just to see him slap himself in the mouth.

781
00:50:58,600 --> 00:50:59,600
Yep. Yeah.

782
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:01,600
I would dig that.

783
00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:03,600
I would too.

784
00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:14,600
Every time a grocery store is out of an item, within two days of the sale, they have to write you a check for wasted gas and time.

785
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:16,600
Oh, I like that one.

786
00:51:17,600 --> 00:51:23,600
Yeah, you go into Price Chopper and like the cherries, they had cherries on sale. I go in there, it's like two days later, none.

787
00:51:24,600 --> 00:51:27,600
Oh, we're sold out. Are you going to get any more in? Oh, probably not.

788
00:51:28,600 --> 00:51:30,600
It was just to drag your ass into the store.

789
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:36,600
Well, I just walked off. I left my cart right there and took off. I was like, you know what? Fuck you guys.

790
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:41,600
And it was right on my way home. It was the one near your house over there in Waldo.

791
00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:51,600
And I mean, maybe if I went to a bigger one, they might have had more. But that particular one pissed me off because they obviously didn't have any inventory two days into it.

792
00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:56,600
So that'd been great if they had to write me a check. Oh, and I'm going to add this to a letter of apology.

793
00:51:57,600 --> 00:51:58,600
Oh yeah.

794
00:51:58,600 --> 00:52:02,600
Letter of apology and wasted time and gas check.

795
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:13,600
You'll see car dealerships do a similar thing. This is done by individual dealerships, not the car company like, you know, like Moly Nissan or whatever.

796
00:52:14,600 --> 00:52:21,600
We'll say, you know, new 2023 Nissan Maxi-Gov, you know, fully loaded, only $23,000.

797
00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:32,600
And everyone's like, wow, that's a great deal. But at the bottom of the screen, it's telling you a specific inventory number, which means it's just that one car.

798
00:52:33,600 --> 00:52:34,600
Yeah. Yeah. I've seen that happen a lot.

799
00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:43,600
And I remember a couple of mine saw an ad like that and they're like, well, that's a great deal. And I said, yeah, but it's just on one car.

800
00:52:44,600 --> 00:52:45,600
And it's already going.

801
00:52:46,600 --> 00:52:48,600
Yeah, it is. Look here. There's the stock number.

802
00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:53,600
And then that's when they direct you to another car and they claim it's a better deal anyhow.

803
00:52:54,600 --> 00:53:00,600
And they get away with the bait and switch accusation because they told you, although they hid it in the commercial, that it was just the one car.

804
00:53:01,600 --> 00:53:05,600
Look, it's right there. Yeah. Yeah. Bunch of bullshit.

805
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:08,600
Yeah. The grocery store is having to pay you for that.

806
00:53:08,600 --> 00:53:18,600
They should also, every time they rearrange the store, they should have to give you a $10 bill for your time and energy to have to relearn where everything is in the store.

807
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:25,600
Oh, I love that. Yeah. There wouldn't be a store left, but I love that.

808
00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:28,600
All the major retailers do that.

809
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:36,600
I remember asking once, why isn't there an app like a Price Chopper app where you're in the Price Chopper and it tells you exactly where everything is.

810
00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:41,600
And Lowe's is really good too. It says Bay 9, Row 7.

811
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:51,600
But the reason grocery stores like Price Chopper don't do that is because it's intended for you to walk the entire store and see everything and buy a lot of stuff.

812
00:53:52,600 --> 00:54:03,600
Well, yesterday the flower was here. It's not here now. So you got to walk to the store and see all the little gimmicks and all the little sugary treats and all this stuff with all the markup and all that.

813
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:07,600
They make it as difficult as possible if you walk in, get what you need and walk right out.

814
00:54:08,600 --> 00:54:17,600
Yes. They want you to walk through every bit of that store that you can, even if you just need flowers, they don't care. They want you to walk through the whole store and find everything, look at everything.

815
00:54:18,600 --> 00:54:29,600
What I've noticed about Price Chopper specifically, I'll walk in the front door and there's lots of bins and displays and things. It's like a game of Frogger.

816
00:54:29,600 --> 00:54:37,600
There's no clear straight path across. They're all scattered here. You've got to walk around and around and around and around and keep zigzagging around.

817
00:54:38,600 --> 00:54:43,600
Then you finally get to the aisles of food and they're offset. You can't look down and see the end of the store.

818
00:54:45,600 --> 00:54:47,600
They're offset. You can only see a few feet in any one direction.

819
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:51,600
That way you have to head down that aisle to see if what you want is in there.

820
00:54:51,600 --> 00:55:00,600
It's like a rat maze and they pushed you in to say in order to get through it to the checkout lane, you've got to walk every damn inch of this store.

821
00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:08,600
I'll go another step further on their little psychology deal here. All the most bought items are in the middle towards the bottom.

822
00:55:09,600 --> 00:55:12,600
So the other way you're coming, you have to go through half of that row.

823
00:55:12,600 --> 00:55:20,600
Like let's say cooking oil is never on the end where someone can grab it. It's always in the middle because everybody uses cooking oil.

824
00:55:21,600 --> 00:55:27,600
Butter, never on the end because everybody uses butter. Milk, never on the end.

825
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:32,600
All of this is always in the middle. They want you to go through at least half of the aisle.

826
00:55:32,600 --> 00:55:44,600
Yeah, and the front half of the store that you walk into is crammed with impulse buys. Magazines, batteries, toys, cheese hats.

827
00:55:45,600 --> 00:55:48,600
Just anything like, oh I want one of those. Oh that looks cool.

828
00:55:49,600 --> 00:55:50,600
None of it you plan to buy when you walk down through here.

829
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:52,600
Like they're selling impulse buys.

830
00:55:53,600 --> 00:55:59,600
What's going to be fun, all I want to do is I want to go into a price shop with somebody and I want to discuss this loudly with them while we walk through the store.

831
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:07,600
You can see here they've set up like a rat maze where you just talk about it loudly so the other customers can hear us and see if they throw me out.

832
00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:10,600
I want to do that and see if they throw me out.

833
00:56:11,600 --> 00:56:17,600
I don't think we have any recourse if you're just talking to someone about it.

834
00:56:18,600 --> 00:56:22,600
I guess they can always say we reserve the right for a few service to anybody.

835
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:26,600
Well you know what you're right because any store can do that.

836
00:56:26,600 --> 00:56:28,600
Yeah. Well okay.

837
00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:34,600
That would just be funny though. Just go in and call them on everything they're doing and make everyone around be aware of it.

838
00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:41,600
I say we do that sometimes, just do an experiment and try two different stores.

839
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:43,600
That would be pretty cool.

840
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:55,600
Wouldn't it be fantastic if anyone that gives out unwanted advice must prove in a court of law that they are in fact using that advice and not just a self-righteous asshole.

841
00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:59,600
Or parroting what somebody heard somebody else say five minutes ago.

842
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:06,600
Exactly. Yeah they heard it on the radio or TV and they're like well you know that 50% of and all this stuff.

843
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:14,600
But yeah it would be great. It's like okay. It's kind of like the red flag progressive commercial.

844
00:57:15,600 --> 00:57:23,600
You ought to be able to throw a flag and go I call bullshit on this and I'll see you in court. What's your next day off? Thursday?

845
00:57:24,600 --> 00:57:27,600
Okay. You need to prove to me that you're not just a blowhard.

846
00:57:27,600 --> 00:57:37,600
Yeah. Yeah like a good example would be when Kim Kardashian told people just to get up and start working hard and just be successful and just quit being poor.

847
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:45,600
It's like yeah you won the birth lottery. You engineered a sex tape to get everyone's attention.

848
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:50,600
You got a billion dollars on plastic surgery and a TV show.

849
00:57:51,600 --> 00:57:55,600
You bitched about crime when your dad got famous for getting a murderer off.

850
00:57:55,600 --> 00:58:00,600
Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Hypocrisy running amok.

851
00:58:01,600 --> 00:58:06,600
Or the people that say you know they see that you have depression and they're like well just snap out of it. Just be happy.

852
00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:11,600
Just think about the good things in your life. I've never had depression but that's always bothered me.

853
00:58:12,600 --> 00:58:15,600
Because don't you think they've thought of that? Yeah. Don't you think? God man.

854
00:58:16,600 --> 00:58:21,600
It's a way to belittle and trivialize someone's major mental illness.

855
00:58:21,600 --> 00:58:24,600
If it wasn't that major of issue why would so many people commit suicide?

856
00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:28,600
It was just some you go oh I'm being silly again.

857
00:58:29,600 --> 00:58:33,600
Yeah. I'm sorry I should just hear. I'm sorry I never thought of that before. Thank you.

858
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:38,600
What I like to say in response is oh okay and you just don't be afraid of spiders.

859
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:41,600
Yeah. Yeah. And you know they go oh but that's different.

860
00:58:42,600 --> 00:58:46,600
No of course it's different because it's you. Go walk in front of a car. Don't be afraid of a car. It'll stop.

861
00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:52,600
Yeah. I have no. As if we could all just snap. Yeah. Just a person like that. Okay take your own advice.

862
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:56,600
Let's see you just not be afraid of anything. Just tell yourself just don't.

863
00:58:57,600 --> 00:59:01,600
Yeah. You truly believe that then fucking do it. Yeah. So and that was the court of law comes in.

864
00:59:02,600 --> 00:59:06,600
Yeah. The court of law you have to prove it. I like that. Yeah I do too.

865
00:59:07,600 --> 00:59:10,600
Alright the next one wouldn't it be fantastic if and you're going to love this one.

866
00:59:10,600 --> 00:59:19,600
What blankets and counter programmers must go to classes on what arguments to partake in and ways to actually help the world and not take a shit on it.

867
00:59:20,600 --> 00:59:34,600
Yes. Yes. Too many times it's someone who is very passionate about their belief but has absolutely no explanation or reason or any convincing thing to say.

868
00:59:34,600 --> 00:59:39,600
All they've got is passion. I believe in it. I love it. It's wonderful. Everyone should like it.

869
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:50,600
Never ever if I heard them ever offer any advice. Yeah. All I hear is a I don't think that's true. Well why. Why don't you think it's true.

870
00:59:51,600 --> 00:59:56,600
Yeah. You never see them do that because I've done that before. Well why do you say that and then they don't answer.

871
00:59:56,600 --> 01:00:05,600
So yeah I like that one a lot because we talked about counter programmers and blankets a lot on this program and we hate them.

872
01:00:06,600 --> 01:00:11,600
A lot of them are just bandwagoning too. Yeah. I want to be on this side that doesn't like it.

873
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:17,600
Exactly. Yeah. And a lot of it is they don't even know what it is what they support. No. They haven't even bottled a plug.

874
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:22,600
But they've got to jump on it because they see a couple of people do it and they're like oh I'm going to do that.

875
01:00:22,600 --> 01:00:27,600
The people I follow on Twitter support this so I'm going to too. I'm not even going to think.

876
01:00:28,600 --> 01:00:34,600
One of the best ones I've ever seen. This reminds me of this. It's not quite the same thing but along the same realm.

877
01:00:35,600 --> 01:00:40,600
OK. That man show. The man show. Remember the man show years ago when Jimmy Kimmel was actually funny.

878
01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:45,600
That seemed like a long time ago. Yeah it was a long time ago. Yeah.

879
01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:58,600
They had support. No no no no. Let's see. They had a petition against women's suffrage. Suffrage. Not suffering. Suffrage.

880
01:00:59,600 --> 01:01:05,600
Yes. So anyone with half a brain at all knows that that means the right to vote. It does not mean women suffering.

881
01:01:06,600 --> 01:01:12,600
And they had so many women on their sign in that going oh yeah I'm sick of it. Oh wow. Yeah.

882
01:01:12,600 --> 01:01:17,600
So women were basically just on face value. They were giving up their right to vote.

883
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:26,600
They have like a little sit down table there and it said that and only one guy caught it and a couple of women caught it but everyone else signed it.

884
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:32,600
Like yeah I'm sick of this shit going on. You don't even know who was suffering. But if they weren't suffering. Or what they were going to do about it.

885
01:01:33,600 --> 01:01:37,600
Yeah or nothing. They're just going to go sign this because they thought wow. That makes sense. This is it.

886
01:01:37,600 --> 01:01:47,600
Hey you guys got one. You guys want to talk. You want to tell us how you feel about the game. Yeah anything. About the game. Yeah. Last night's game.

887
01:01:48,600 --> 01:01:58,600
Oh. I was excited. I was screaming. Screaming. It was close. Yeah. It was typical Chiefs fashion. Yeah.

888
01:01:58,600 --> 01:02:08,600
I wasn't at the Chiefs. I'm not a huge Chiefs fan. Yeah. Only because I don't watch football. I'm from Dallas. I've said my football name wasn't good.

889
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:14,600
We're kind of getting out of football because it's getting too much just for the gambler anymore. Yeah. And I don't gamble.

890
01:02:15,600 --> 01:02:26,600
They take all these timeouts and stuff for the gambler. They want to give you time to place a bet. And now they openly talk about it. I mean you know it's becoming. It's an entertainment.

891
01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:32,600
Where do they talk about it at? Oh they do it on the broadcast. Yeah. Yeah they'll come up with like odds and everything.

892
01:02:33,600 --> 01:02:40,600
They'll tell you what the line is and the over under and they'll give you stats so you can place bets more efficiently. It's just all serving the gambler anymore.

893
01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:50,600
This became too much of a. It's a touting service. Yeah. That's what they call them touts. Yeah. When they promote the races of the gambling. Yeah. Yeah.

894
01:02:50,600 --> 01:02:59,600
So that's what I'd be telling her. It's just sports is not what they used to be. No it isn't. It's too much money to be made. Not even college.

895
01:03:00,600 --> 01:03:09,600
Yeah. Not even college. Maybe because I was younger but I just loved the game like basketball. Like if I was a basketball player it's still not the same now.

896
01:03:10,600 --> 01:03:16,600
No it is and I agree. You got to kind of go down to the high school level before it's back to where you kind of remember a thing.

897
01:03:16,600 --> 01:03:26,600
I love the high school football game. It's so good. I think Schumper said something about that. It was like high school basketball is more relatable to NBA than it is college.

898
01:03:27,600 --> 01:03:39,600
I would agree. I would agree. To a normal ham and agar like us. I mean why wouldn't it appeal to us? Because we don't get that other side of the world that these people do.

899
01:03:39,600 --> 01:03:55,600
They won the genetic lottery with a lot of hard work. But I could never do that. Topher could never do that. So it's really hard to relate because they're automatically on another level.

900
01:03:56,600 --> 01:04:04,600
But I don't condemn them. I mean you get what you can out of life. Yeah. It's just the way the sport is being run.

901
01:04:04,600 --> 01:04:14,600
The individual athlete I don't think can get anything near the satisfaction that they could like three generations ago. Even though you're getting paid a lot more.

902
01:04:15,600 --> 01:04:23,600
I think it's a much more empty experience overall. It comes with heart. It's not just sports. It's just like basketball and television.

903
01:04:23,600 --> 01:04:34,600
But a lot of things that people do, it doesn't come with heart anymore. It comes with viewers and stuff like that. Not saying this, but if you see somebody else doing stuff like this.

904
01:04:35,600 --> 01:04:42,600
No, no, no. We were talking along. If they're not getting enough views in a short amount of time, then they'll stop doing it. You see what I'm saying?

905
01:04:42,600 --> 01:04:52,600
It's all for superficial, immediate gain. We were talking along these same lines. It's interesting you brought that up because we were talking along these same lines earlier.

906
01:04:53,600 --> 01:05:09,600
And we agree with you wholeheartedly. People just don't put in the work anymore. It's just sports are televised. It's easier to criticize them rather than the old man.

907
01:05:09,600 --> 01:05:21,600
My cooking, everybody is just mediocre with that. They don't put their heart into it. People hire up chefs I guess.

908
01:05:22,600 --> 01:05:28,600
But a lot of times when we're wanting to buy something, we want the person providing it to put their heart and soul into it.

909
01:05:29,600 --> 01:05:36,600
But for so much else of society, it's like that's just considered a foolish waste of time. It's like, oh, this is good enough.

910
01:05:36,600 --> 01:05:40,600
Yeah, just a minimum.

911
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:43,600
You guys have a card or something?

912
01:05:44,600 --> 01:05:45,600
We should make cards.

913
01:05:46,600 --> 01:05:54,600
We do need to make cards. It's toducebagsandmicrophone.net and we're on all major platforms. Here, I'll write it down for you and just give it to you.

914
01:05:55,600 --> 01:06:00,600
And we're eventually going to have a number so if you ever want to call up, feel free to.

915
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:05,600
We're going to get a website designer to help us out because we can't really get it done ourselves.

916
01:06:06,600 --> 01:06:07,600
I don't know how to do websites either.

917
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:10,600
Yeah, it's a website to make a website.

918
01:06:11,600 --> 01:06:18,600
We had to kind of teach ourselves how to do audio recording and processing. We're getting better at that, but allegedly.

919
01:06:19,600 --> 01:06:21,600
We say allegedly a lot.

920
01:06:21,600 --> 01:06:33,600
Yeah, this is all one word and we're on all major platforms, but iTunes is really hard to find us because they have this system that you kind of like to that.

921
01:06:34,600 --> 01:06:40,600
You kind of have to have different views and I think there's like another tier that you can pay for to get more recognized.

922
01:06:41,600 --> 01:06:44,600
So good luck finding us on that, but we are on it somewhere.

923
01:06:45,600 --> 01:06:47,600
But we're on it. Yeah. Hey, man. What's your name?

924
01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:52,600
Matthew, very nice to meet you. Great. Great. All right. Very nice to meet you both.

925
01:06:53,600 --> 01:06:54,600
You're going to be on our next episode. Yeah.

926
01:06:55,600 --> 01:06:57,600
All right. Take care. It's good talking to you.

927
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:00,600
Yeah, I love it down here.

928
01:07:01,600 --> 01:07:03,600
Another testament to the effectiveness of the banner.

929
01:07:04,600 --> 01:07:06,600
Yeah. That thing is worth wonders.

930
01:07:07,600 --> 01:07:11,600
We hardly ever got anyone to stop by and talk before the banner, but now it's like everybody stops.

931
01:07:12,600 --> 01:07:15,600
Oh, and while you're using the bathroom, a guy come by into the picture.

932
01:07:16,600 --> 01:07:20,600
Yeah. I asked him if he had anything to say. He said not today, but later on he will.

933
01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:22,600
So I was like, okay.

934
01:07:23,600 --> 01:07:26,600
All right. Where was I? Wouldn't be.

935
01:07:27,600 --> 01:07:29,600
Fantastic gift. Yeah.

936
01:07:31,600 --> 01:07:39,600
Hey, anyone wearing a man bun must have apology flashcards on hand to address anyone that might have accidentally witnessed the atrocity.

937
01:07:40,600 --> 01:07:41,600
Oh, I like that idea.

938
01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:47,600
Yeah. Yeah. So these weren't a man bun. He must have flashcards with an apology going, Hey, I'm sorry. I'm a douche bag.

939
01:07:48,600 --> 01:07:50,600
And you have to see that. Not a, not a good douche bag like us.

940
01:07:51,600 --> 01:07:52,600
No, no bad douche bag.

941
01:07:53,600 --> 01:07:57,600
Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm a follow the leader guy. I'm not a leader. I'm sorry. I don't think for myself.

942
01:07:58,600 --> 01:08:01,600
I'm sorry. I'm a weak, weak bellied, spineless dumb ass. Yeah.

943
01:08:02,600 --> 01:08:05,600
I saw an epic man bum the other day at Texas Roadhouse.

944
01:08:06,600 --> 01:08:07,600
Did you burn it?

945
01:08:07,600 --> 01:08:10,600
I wanted to, but I was too full to get up from the table and do anything about it.

946
01:08:11,600 --> 01:08:12,600
I had this great big awesome rib eyes.

947
01:08:13,600 --> 01:08:14,600
You missed the perfect opportunity to take a lighter to it.

948
01:08:15,600 --> 01:08:20,600
So he had gathered all of his hair up on top of the head, his head on a round ball.

949
01:08:21,600 --> 01:08:26,600
But instead of making it a nice tight or a smooth to the scalp, it was loose.

950
01:08:27,600 --> 01:08:33,600
So it sagged down and his hair formed, for all the world, it looked like a big giant hair pancake on his head.

951
01:08:33,600 --> 01:08:36,600
And then that ball on top, like a big hairy ball of whipped cream.

952
01:08:37,600 --> 01:08:42,600
He looked like he had a hair pancake with a hair ball of whipped cream on top of his head.

953
01:08:43,600 --> 01:08:44,600
Oh my God.

954
01:08:45,600 --> 01:08:47,600
And as he would walk, it would wiggle side to side, back to forth.

955
01:08:48,600 --> 01:08:50,600
And it looked like that pancake on his head was going to slip off.

956
01:08:51,600 --> 01:08:52,600
It was the most ugly, revolting.

957
01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:54,600
And this is an eating establishment.

958
01:08:54,600 --> 01:09:02,600
I kind of respect that a little bit because he took it to the extreme.

959
01:09:03,600 --> 01:09:04,600
Look how stupid I can get.

960
01:09:05,600 --> 01:09:08,600
Yeah, he's like, I'm going to gross all you motherfuckers out with my hair ball.

961
01:09:09,600 --> 01:09:12,600
Now ponytails are okay.

962
01:09:13,600 --> 01:09:14,600
I should have got a picture of it.

963
01:09:15,600 --> 01:09:17,600
I mean, my hair isn't a ponytail right now.

964
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:21,600
So I'm okay with ponytails, but what I'm not okay with is the side pony.

965
01:09:21,600 --> 01:09:23,600
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

966
01:09:24,600 --> 01:09:25,600
I'll tell you, you made it famous.

967
01:09:26,600 --> 01:09:28,600
My opinion was Napoleon Dynamite, the chick on there.

968
01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:30,600
Yes.

969
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:32,600
Because after she did it, all these chicks started doing it.

970
01:09:33,600 --> 01:09:35,600
Being the awkward girl with the side ponytail.

971
01:09:36,600 --> 01:09:39,600
And you know, all it looks like to me is your arms are two different lengths.

972
01:09:40,600 --> 01:09:43,600
And you couldn't reach around the back of the head because one arm's longer than the other.

973
01:09:44,600 --> 01:09:46,600
I agree. It doesn't look right. It's like, why did you do that?

974
01:09:46,600 --> 01:09:53,600
I mean, it was over five years ago, but you turn on that Chip and Joanna Gaines show.

975
01:09:54,600 --> 01:09:55,600
Side pony constantly on that chick.

976
01:09:56,600 --> 01:09:57,600
Oh yeah.

977
01:09:58,600 --> 01:10:01,600
It was just the stupidest thing ever. Of course, that couple is revoltingly stupid.

978
01:10:02,600 --> 01:10:04,600
All of them are on these white people renovating houses and shows.

979
01:10:05,600 --> 01:10:07,600
They're always white people. It's always a white couple.

980
01:10:08,600 --> 01:10:11,600
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's always an Hispanic contractor too.

981
01:10:11,600 --> 01:10:15,600
Yeah, yeah. And you know, the dude does all the work and acts like an oaf and an idiot.

982
01:10:16,600 --> 01:10:19,600
And the wife does all the little design stuff and treats her husband like a child.

983
01:10:20,600 --> 01:10:21,600
And then the real work?

984
01:10:22,600 --> 01:10:23,600
It's the same show after show after show.

985
01:10:24,600 --> 01:10:26,600
You see the Hispanic guy come in and he's like, yeah, we're going to do that.

986
01:10:27,600 --> 01:10:33,600
And they do all the real work and then the white guy comes in behind him and is like, oh boy, glad we're done with that.

987
01:10:34,600 --> 01:10:38,600
What a task when he didn't do anything except watch the Hispanics fucking work.

988
01:10:38,600 --> 01:10:44,600
Yeah. And yeah, the big white guy, husband guy, whatever, who's supposed to be the main construction worker.

989
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:52,600
He spends more time on camera playing with his kids or talking with friends or joking with his wife.

990
01:10:53,600 --> 01:10:54,600
He maybe will swing a hammer once or twice.

991
01:10:55,600 --> 01:11:01,600
He'll spend three times as much time on camera doing feel good moments and not actually working.

992
01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:10,600
Exactly. And then another thing is, is they don't want you to see the Hispanic people working so bad that they skip through it and then they show them tearing down the last wall.

993
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:24,600
Yeah. Those celebrity makeovers or extreme makeover, whatever shows, those very quickly people learned that the celebrities like that Ty Pennington or whatever.

994
01:11:25,600 --> 01:11:26,600
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pennington, I think.

995
01:11:26,600 --> 01:11:30,600
He'd only show up and work when the cameras are rolling. As soon as the cameras quit, he was gone.

996
01:11:31,600 --> 01:11:45,600
And it was left to local contractors with substandard materials and pretty much every one of those makeover houses had to be torn apart and redone for tens and tens of thousands of dollars because it was all shit and it wasn't up to code.

997
01:11:46,600 --> 01:11:52,600
You notice in the TV shows, they never had the code inspector come through and say this passes, this fails, this pass.

998
01:11:52,600 --> 01:11:57,600
They never had code come and look at it. They just dump it on the family and say, this is your mess now.

999
01:11:58,600 --> 01:12:07,600
And then they have to pay for all the repairs. They can't live in it until it's up to code. And now it's worth so much more. They have to pay higher taxes. It basically ruins the people.

1000
01:12:08,600 --> 01:12:09,600
That thing almost got on your head.

1001
01:12:10,600 --> 01:12:11,600
That's amazing.

1002
01:12:12,600 --> 01:12:14,600
I mean, it just was like that far above your head.

1003
01:12:15,600 --> 01:12:16,600
I didn't even feel it.

1004
01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:19,600
I think it was entertaining landing on you. Then you moved to low bend and it was like, oh, no.

1005
01:12:20,600 --> 01:12:21,600
That would have been kind of funny.

1006
01:12:21,600 --> 01:12:22,600
That would have been.

1007
01:12:24,600 --> 01:12:26,600
I don't know. Those claws might be pretty stout.

1008
01:12:27,600 --> 01:12:28,600
They probably would have taken a crap on me.

1009
01:12:29,600 --> 01:12:30,600
I knew I was ranting about something.

1010
01:12:33,600 --> 01:12:35,600
The next one you're really going to appreciate too.

1011
01:12:36,600 --> 01:12:42,600
Anyone who says they like the taste of kale, but they must pass a polygraph test.

1012
01:12:42,600 --> 01:12:50,600
And if it is proven false, you must offer free seminars on how not to be a gullible sheeple.

1013
01:12:51,600 --> 01:13:00,600
Yes. We could even go as far as putting them in an MRI, having them eat a pound of kale and see if the pleasure centers of their brain light up.

1014
01:13:01,600 --> 01:13:05,600
I think that's automatic. We do that automatically. I like that idea better. Fuck the polygraph.

1015
01:13:06,600 --> 01:13:09,600
That's better than polygraph because we can actually see how their brain is responding to eating kale.

1016
01:13:09,600 --> 01:13:15,600
We can see their brain decrease and folding up into itself when they taste that god awful horrible.

1017
01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:17,600
Brain cell death increases rapidly.

1018
01:13:18,600 --> 01:13:19,600
Yeah.

1019
01:13:20,600 --> 01:13:23,600
So that would be definite proof positive. Say, look, your own body's rejected.

1020
01:13:24,600 --> 01:13:26,600
That radioactive material that they found at the bottom.

1021
01:13:27,600 --> 01:13:28,600
Yes.

1022
01:13:29,600 --> 01:13:32,600
They couldn't get rid of, that they convinced people that it was great tasting.

1023
01:13:32,600 --> 01:13:43,600
It's like this, at one time the makers of Lysol, you know, that spray disinfectant.

1024
01:13:44,600 --> 01:13:47,600
At one time they marketed that as a douche.

1025
01:13:48,600 --> 01:13:55,600
You're supposed to pour Lysol, which has a lot of formaldehyde, up into your pooch.

1026
01:13:56,600 --> 01:13:59,600
It basically would kill you from the inside out.

1027
01:13:59,600 --> 01:14:02,600
Yeah, I think they need to stick with vinegar.

1028
01:14:03,600 --> 01:14:07,600
Yeah. Good old Lysol. They didn't care whether you killed yourself.

1029
01:14:08,600 --> 01:14:10,600
They just wanted to sell a few more bottles of that product.

1030
01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:15,600
Oh, but the makers of Lysol have your best interests in mind, don't they?

1031
01:14:16,600 --> 01:14:19,600
They make healthcare products. They have to be nice people.

1032
01:14:20,600 --> 01:14:23,600
Lysol loves us. Why else would they improve our life so much?

1033
01:14:24,600 --> 01:14:26,600
Oh, the enormous profits. That's right.

1034
01:14:26,600 --> 01:14:28,600
I forgot about the enormous profits involved.

1035
01:14:29,600 --> 01:14:31,600
They would never lie to us.

1036
01:14:32,600 --> 01:14:34,600
Oh, unless they could make some money.

1037
01:14:35,600 --> 01:14:36,600
Yeah.

1038
01:14:37,600 --> 01:14:41,600
All right, this next one. Any person who has caught fake listening to someone while buried in their phone

1039
01:14:42,600 --> 01:14:45,600
must pass a test of repeating what the victim has said previously.

1040
01:14:46,600 --> 01:14:51,600
And then, if then convicted of fake listening, she'll be spammed relentlessly for two days.

1041
01:14:52,600 --> 01:14:53,600
Yes.

1042
01:14:53,600 --> 01:14:56,600
So, his phone will be his or her. Just blown up with spam.

1043
01:14:57,600 --> 01:15:00,600
And you know, whenever you say something, they're like, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.

1044
01:15:01,600 --> 01:15:04,600
And you know they're not listening to you because they're answering someone or something.

1045
01:15:05,600 --> 01:15:09,600
You know, why don't they just go, hang on a second, I'm in the middle of something.

1046
01:15:10,600 --> 01:15:12,600
No, instead they're going to go, yeah, uh-huh.

1047
01:15:13,600 --> 01:15:15,600
And then when you question, they're like, oh no, I was listening.

1048
01:15:16,600 --> 01:15:19,600
And they take one key word that they happen to catch, like, yeah, refrigerators.

1049
01:15:19,600 --> 01:15:23,600
And then most of us are just like, fuck it, I know you weren't listening,

1050
01:15:24,600 --> 01:15:26,600
but you said refrigerators, so I kind of got to go along with it.

1051
01:15:27,600 --> 01:15:30,600
It's fun to catch the people who are, you're watching a movie or a show

1052
01:15:31,600 --> 01:15:33,600
or something with someone and they're constantly on their phone.

1053
01:15:34,600 --> 01:15:36,600
Every time their eyes leave the screen and go to their phone, hit pause.

1054
01:15:37,600 --> 01:15:38,600
I love that.

1055
01:15:39,600 --> 01:15:42,600
And when they look up, it's like, oh, I stopped the movie so you wouldn't miss any.

1056
01:15:43,600 --> 01:15:44,600
Well, it's okay, you're just going without me.

1057
01:15:45,600 --> 01:15:46,600
It's like, no, that's fine, I'll wait.

1058
01:15:46,600 --> 01:15:48,600
I'll wait. I'm happy to wait.

1059
01:15:49,600 --> 01:15:53,600
I want to make sure we both watch it together and just constantly pause and pause and pause

1060
01:15:54,600 --> 01:15:56,600
and finally they'll get the message that, yeah, this ain't happening

1061
01:15:57,600 --> 01:15:58,600
unless your eyes are on the screen.

1062
01:15:59,600 --> 01:16:02,600
And you know, a person like that better not ask me what's going on.

1063
01:16:03,600 --> 01:16:04,600
Well, who's that character? What are they talking about?

1064
01:16:05,600 --> 01:16:06,600
What's going on? I didn't notice it.

1065
01:16:07,600 --> 01:16:09,600
You weren't looking at the screen. Where are you? You were looking at your phone.

1066
01:16:10,600 --> 01:16:12,600
I would have said, I'm sorry, I was on my phone.

1067
01:16:13,600 --> 01:16:14,600
I just start saying, I don't know.

1068
01:16:14,600 --> 01:16:16,600
I'll have to watch it again. I don't know.

1069
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:18,600
That's awesome.

1070
01:16:19,600 --> 01:16:21,600
If you're not watching, I'm not going to be your interpreter.

1071
01:16:23,600 --> 01:16:27,600
Yeah. And also, I mean, even people on the movie screen,

1072
01:16:28,600 --> 01:16:31,600
because we went and seen A Man Called Otto a couple of weeks ago,

1073
01:16:32,600 --> 01:16:35,600
and I have some interesting takes on that too that we can get to right after,

1074
01:16:36,600 --> 01:16:39,600
because I meant to do it for a while now, for a couple of weeks,

1075
01:16:39,600 --> 01:16:43,600
but I just never, I don't know what, forgotten or whatever.

1076
01:16:44,600 --> 01:16:49,600
So, okay, last but not least,

1077
01:16:50,600 --> 01:16:55,600
anyone name dropping must produce a picture of said person and the bragger together.

1078
01:16:56,600 --> 01:17:00,600
If they cannot, it is Fielder's choice on punishment from a barefoot toe stomp

1079
01:17:01,600 --> 01:17:02,600
to a crack in the nab sickle.

1080
01:17:03,600 --> 01:17:06,600
Some people will name drop on products too.

1081
01:17:06,600 --> 01:17:10,600
I draw my Jaguar up there, it's like, let me see the picture of you and the Jaguar

1082
01:17:11,600 --> 01:17:12,600
and the VIN and your keys.

1083
01:17:13,600 --> 01:17:17,600
Yes. Yep. Yeah. And if not, then whatever you want,

1084
01:17:18,600 --> 01:17:21,600
toe stomp, nab sickle, light them on fire, whatever, it's Fielder's choice.

1085
01:17:22,600 --> 01:17:28,600
You make the decision on what happens to said bragger, to said name dropper.

1086
01:17:29,600 --> 01:17:33,600
There's a Facebook group that I'm a, several that I'm a member of

1087
01:17:33,600 --> 01:17:37,600
that are like Epiphone guitar owners and modders or the Grach owners group

1088
01:17:38,600 --> 01:17:39,600
or this kind of thing.

1089
01:17:40,600 --> 01:17:43,600
And anytime anyone says, oh, I just bought a new guitar, it's a new guitar day,

1090
01:17:44,600 --> 01:17:47,600
if they don't post a picture, everyone calls them on it.

1091
01:17:48,600 --> 01:17:51,600
Oh, that's great. Yeah. If the standard response is without pictures,

1092
01:17:52,600 --> 01:17:53,600
this post is worthless.

1093
01:17:54,600 --> 01:17:58,600
Basically saying, we don't believe you. We got to see pictures.

1094
01:17:58,600 --> 01:18:05,600
So any more people will put up pictures. They have to. Otherwise, no one, no one believe them.

1095
01:18:06,600 --> 01:18:07,600
Yep.

1096
01:18:19,600 --> 01:18:23,600
Hey, where'd everybody go? Where are the douchebags?

1097
01:18:23,600 --> 01:18:28,600
Oh my God. Someone took a dump in the corner. Oh geez.

1098
01:18:29,600 --> 01:18:32,600
Glad they're gone. Let's just hope they don't come back.

1099
01:18:32,600 --> 01:18:53,600
Man, that smells.