Live from the city market, it is Two Douchebags and Microphone Podcast.
A general reminder from Two Douchebags and a Microphone, if you note your alarm on the
first day of July, you are likely to be signed up for free Target practice.
Responsible for greasy residue left on your Bluetooth.
Hello, this is Two Douchebags and a Microphone, I'm Mark.
And I'm Rob.
Alright.
Well, everybody, thanks for joining us, unless you joined us by accident, thank you for this
collomabob問 and welcome to on the Nic messingastian podcast.
And we're talking about none other than our lovable Tyreke Hill, the Dolphins receiver.
Okay, so anyhow, Dolphins receiver Tyreke Hill apparently realized the error of his
ways and reportedly tried to promptly rectify it.
According to Angie DeMichele, I think, DeMichele, I think that's how you pronounce it, but if
you don't then who cares.
Of the South Florida Sun Sentinel, Hill offered the 57 year old man whom Hill allegedly slapped.
I guess it's a slap and it wasn't a punch in the back of the head, but who knows.
We've heard both and read both.
Hill allegedly slapped on June 18th the sum of $200 in the time after the incident.
So Tyreke Hill was like, oh shit, oh no, I did bad, and he only offered him $200.
The fuck is wrong with that guy?
Everybody knows that this slap has probably worked at least $50 grand, if not more.
And not to mention all the pub you get on TV and everything and all this stuff.
Hell, he could probably start a GoFundMe because he got slapped or punched by Tyreke Hill now
and probably make $100 grand because people are that stupid.
So anyhow, the information comes from a supplement to the original report prepared by the Miami
Dade Police Department.
Per the report, the dispute happened when Hill and others entered a docked private boat.
The captain of the boat told him to leave.
Hill allegedly said to the captain, I can buy you in the boat.
So I guess the captain wasn't too happy about that, which I wouldn't be either if I was
the captain.
The captain contends that Hill began to spew expletives and became enraged and attempted
to enter the boat to cause him bodily harm but was held back by unknown associates.
Hill did not identify himself by name, saying that only he is number 10 from the Miami Dolphins.
What a conceited prick.
You mean the team that did not even sniff the Super Bowl this year?
Those guys?
Oh yeah, that's right.
Our number 10 is Pacheco.
He's got a ring.
You know number 10, Isaiah Pacheco?
He's got a ring.
The number 10 over there in Miami, he does not have a ring.
He has one ring though.
It's the ring that the Chiefs got for him, which he did play well in.
He played well in the Super Bowl.
But yes, we're talking about that guy with only one ring and you know where we have two
rings here.
That guy right there.
During the dispute, an employee of Kelly Fishing Fleet walked over to the scene.
Hill allegedly slapped that employee on the back of the neck.
So I guess he slapped him, he didn't punch him in the back of the neck, but whatever.
Surveillance footage per the Supplemental Police Department backs up the versions offered
by the boat captain and the employee who was struck.
The employee later identified Hill in a photo lineup.
Ha ha ha.
Hill got identified in a lineup.
That makes it even funnier, doesn't it?
Ha ha ha.
Yeah, yeah, that guy right there with the weird hat.
That's the guy that hit me.
Well, probably like everybody knows what you look like.
The State Attorney office is currently handling the investigation.
The NFL has not commented on the matter at this point.
It would be difficult for the NFL to ignore it, especially if surveillance video shows
Hill hitting the employee.
And as we all know, video does everything, as in Kareem Hunt.
There were all these rumors about Kareem Hunt until the video came out.
Even the chiefs went to Hunt and said, hey, tell us the truth and we'll figure this thing
out.
And he lied to them and that's why they let him go.
And then when the video came out, TMZ broke it.
All of a sudden, that's the end right there.
Tyree Hill may be a phenomenal talent and one of the better receivers ever.
Who knows?
It's still, all that's still unwritten at this point.
So we know that he's a phenomenal talent at least.
He needs to watch what he's doing because the NFL can't take very many more bruises
or black eyes.
That's all there is to it.
And they have to address a lot of these violence issues because the NFL has become like a,
what would you call it?
Like a kinder castle of violence.
Like you know, it's a, and you know, who knows the reason why people blame it being a barbaric
sport, but you'll see people in rugby go around beating the shit out of innocent people and
their wives and stuff.
So I don't believe that.
Maybe it's steroids, maybe it's CTE.
Who knows what it is, but the NFL has to start addressing this and has to start cracking
down on it.
So Tyree, he may be flying high right now, but he better watch.
They'll get his wings clipped really fucking quick.
If you start dipping into the NFL pockets, they don't give a shit who you are.
They will clip your wings.
So anyhow, the NFL typically takes no action under personal conduct policy until any associated
criminal case has ended.
Hill's history, he pleaded guilty to choking and punching his then pregnant girlfriend
in 2015, would potentially enhance any punishment imposed on Hill.
So in other words, the NFL looks back on that.
And if you have a history of violence, that just adds to it.
They're just going to go, yeah, and he did this back then, and he did this, and he did
this.
So he needs to watch it.
Not that I give a shit about that guy, how many times he's mouthing off about Kansas
City.
So you know what, fuck nut, go ahead.
Get kicked off the team, whatever.
Get kicked out of football.
We don't give a shit.
We don't need your ass.
Obviously, number one offense, Super Bowl ring.
That's a sucker dick, Hill.
Anyhow, if I could speak a little bit better, it would sound better.
Let me try that again.
Sucker dicks, Hill.
Officially.
No, that sounds a lot better.
Thank you.
Officially.
From Kansas City.
So, bye bye.
And I agree 100%.
Thank you.
So Rob, what's been going on with you?
I hear you had a surprise in your inbox.
Yes!
I have a surprise in my inbox.
I finally got a picture.
I love it.
Came all the way from Uganda.
No shit!
The guy's name's, the guy's name's Gonza.
What was it?
What body part was it?
Oh, it was exactly as you asked.
It was ass up face?
Ass up face, yes.
He's at only 30.
Oh my God, this makes my year.
Yes!
Oh my God.
You got out of it buddy, you got out.
Yay!
Thank you.
What's his name again?
Gonza.
Thank you Gonza from Uganda.
Thank you Gonza.
Finally.
I can't believe he actually did the ass up face like I've been requesting.
This is your ass.
Hey, Gonza, send him more.
He loves it.
Actually, I, he is a good looking dude.
Whoopsie.
There you go.
Alright man, call us the love connection.
I don't know.
There you go.
Well, speaking of, let's see, well I can't really, let's see, well I'm trying to figure
out how I can transition from one thing to another but I don't know if I can.
So, alright, so this story is kind of weird but a woman in Indiana who police said was
robbed at gunpoint outside her home said she was later asked out on a date by her attacker.
In a twist, police said the armed robbery suspect also told the woman he would pay her
back.
According to the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department, the victim was getting
mail outside her home during the early morning hours of May 8th when she saw a stranger,
later identified as Damian Boyce 31, walking up to her home.
A probable cause affidavit obtained by USA Today shows Boyce of Indianapolis then asked
the woman if she lived in the home.
When the victim responded yes and then the man asked if he needed, hang on, I screwed
this whole thing up.
When the victim responded yes and asked the man if he needed help, she said he pulled
out a gun.
Boyce then told her the victim was going back to break into her home.
Court paper said she told him she had nothing inside and that she had money in her car.
The victim then gave Boyce about $100 in cash.
Boyce then asked the victim if she had a boyfriend and asked her to connect with him on social
media.
Pointing the firearm at the victim, the male asked her to add him as a friend on Facebook
so he could pay the victim back the money he stole, the affidavit said.
The male then gave the victim the name of Damian Boyce.
Boyce pointed to his Facebook profile, asked the victim to add him as a friend, police
said, as she complied.
I thought if maybe I added him on Facebook he would leave and he did.
The victim told local outlet WRTV.
She went to the police afterwards and said this guy right here did this.
Then he added me on Facebook and asked me out.
Well now he is, well unless he bonded out he is sitting in jail and no date.
So yeah.
So talking about ballsy.
I'm going to rob this woman at gunpoint and then I'm going to ask her if she has a boyfriend
and then I'm going to take her money and I'm going to tell her that I'm going to pay her
back and then I'm going to add her on Facebook and try to get a date with her.
I don't know if that's, I think that's insane.
I don't even think that's ballsy.
I don't even think you can call that ballsy.
I think you can just call that just flat out fucking insane.
Wouldn't you?
Yeah.
So, well, anyhow, he's going to, well I guess he probably had to pay her the hundred bucks
back.
He may think about keeping that to retain a lawyer.
Yeah, it might be a good idea.
Yeah, probably a good idea.
So there you go Damien Boyce.
Good job idiot.
So Rob, you got some stuff you want to talk about?
Anything going on down there at the lake region?
Oh, well.
I do want, every year there's an unsanctioned boat race.
It's like the world's largest.
I know what you're talking about.
It goes on here on Lake of the Ozarks.
There are boats that run over 200 mile an hour on this lake.
There have been a lot of wrecks too.
Yes, yes there have.
What it is, is it's a single boat track, so there's only one boat on the course at a time.
And what they do is they get a rolling start at like 55 mile an hour, something like that,
if I remember right.
And then they just lay into it, open it up and run as fast as they can.
It's actually kind of crazy when you see it going on.
Oh yeah, it's crazy.
Some of them get to jump in, some of them, alright, it's a neat thing.
It really is.
You can actually see, it's unsanctioned like Rob said, but you can actually see a lot of
it on YouTube.
Yeah, yeah.
Actually there was a TV station a few years ago that was airing it.
You can catch it in different places.
It's called the Lake Area Shootout.
That sounds about right, yeah.
It's the weekend of August 26 and 27.
That whole week before they have different functions that they do, they'll set some of
the boats.
You can go and look at the boats down at the lake.
It's a good, big thing down here.
Wow.
It's the weekend before Labor Day, so if you want to make it a double weekend, there you
go.
Yeah, or get the fuck out of there for Labor Day.
My suggestion is go for the boat race before Labor Day and get the fuck out of there for
Labor Day.
Some people do that.
Oh, I used to when I used to go to that lake, yes.
Now like I said, I'm more into Arkansas and Eureka Springs and stuff like that.
I'll occasionally go to Beaver Lake, sometimes Table Rock, but I really don't go to Lake of
Ozarks very much anymore because it's just too uncontrolled.
It's very commercialized down here.
Yes.
Very commercialized.
It's nothing like it used to be.
No.
Now, is Party Cove still going on or did they finally find a way to tame that?
No, it's still going on.
Okay, for people that are not sure what we're talking about, look up Party Cove, Lake of
the Ozarks.
Look at some of that footage.
It's Sodom and Gomorrah.
People are like fucking naked everywhere, fucking shooting bottle rockets out of their
assholes.
I'm not kidding you.
It's a giant party.
Oh, it's insane.
All 24-7.
It's insane the shit they get away with over there.
It's funny because there's not a cop around.
No.
They're all over the other side of the lake.
They know better.
They're nowhere near that debauchery.
There's a lot of money in that cove too.
That's why I was wondering if it was still going on because there's a lot of commercial
interest there now.
I was wondering if they ran it off or not, but I guess they didn't.
Well, every time they run it off out of a cove, it just goes to a different cove.
A different cove, yeah.
Yeah.
Because it used to be-
It used to be like the third or fourth cove that I know of, and that's since the 90s.
When I knew it, I think it was over near Ivy Bend.
Yeah.
See, now it's down on a nine-warram.
Oh, way down there over near you guys?
Yeah.
It's down on the other side of the Grand Lake Bridge.
Oh, the Grand Lake Bridge.
Over at Osage Beach.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
It's on the other side of it.
Okay.
Yeah, it really did.
It really is.
Okay.
Well, all right.
Well, anyhow, if anyone thinks about moving or going and looking at it there, it's there
for right now.
It'll probably move, but it's there right now.
Yeah.
It's doing more than fun.
Go into a bait store, buy some beer, buy some tackle, and say, where is the party at?
And they'll let you know.
I'm not kidding you.
They'll be like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, where are you going to be leaving at?
Oh, let's say... What is that one?
Cactus Point or whatever?
Oh, well, you know what?
Whatever it is.
Or one that I know, but this is Truman Lake.
Bucksaw Point.
Where are you leaving?
Bucksaw Point.
Yeah, go to the left and then go up there about three miles and then take the channel
to the right.
They'll tell you where to go.
So anyhow, I suggest this is an experience for everyone to at least do once.
Yep.
So what else is going on, Rob?
Oh, that's about all I got for now.
Okay.
I'll have more next week after the pork dry weekend.
Oh, shit.
Guaranteed, guaranteed.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
There'll be something crazy going on.
Oh, God, yeah.
Oh, you'll probably have more than one story, I'm sure.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
A lot of what I'm seeing political and I'm not going there is some of it's totally stupid.
Oh, really?
Yeah, a lot of the news I'm reading, it's mainly political and it's stupid.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
I've gotten to where I don't pay attention to politics anymore.
Look, basically the same thing is going to happen no matter who gets in office because
to me they're probably not really the ones pulling all the punches.
Right.
I think to think that there's like one guy that's causing all this shit is absurd in
a country this huge with so many interests in so many different areas and so vast.
I think that it is a game among billionaires that's being played every day on America's
back.
So, we are the facilitators of the labor and everything for them to gather and reap the
benefits from.
End of story.
No more, no less than that.
So, these people that control this with the money, they get the best healthcare, they
get the best everything.
We get the scraps.
Bottom line, and it's really not any more complex than that, is people get greedy, they
want power and money and they'll do anything, anything to keep it.
Bottom fucking line.
R or D does not mean shit.
Never had, never will.
It's just so someone can oppose someone and try to run against them.
That's all the R and the D means is you and I play golf on the weekends, but I want to
get the job you're trying to get, so you're running as an R, so I'm going to go as a D
or vice versa.
So, anyone that tries to tell me that one person is going to make any type of a fucking
difference at all, I'm going to say you're a straight ass foolish and you'll believe
anything, and I got a bridge to sell you.
Bottom fucking line.
End of story.
I'm not going to politics on this show.
No, and like I said before, look, there's a lot of people, a lot smarter than me, that
are reading this stuff off and looking at everything, I'll leave it to them.
Okay?
There's a lot smarter than me, so let them tell you what's going on and let you figure
out whether you believe it or not, or if they have something that's controlling them.
Like some of them.
If you want entertainment, you listen to us.
Yeah.
You want dick jokes and some guy from Nairobi showing Rob his asshole online because I
requested.
Wear your place.
I'll take more.
You want somebody that can tell you the Constitution backwards, word for word?
That's not us.
No.
So we are America first though.
So anyhow.
I do have another story.
Oh, go ahead.
On Saturday morning, a detective from the St. Louis Police Department was discovered
unconscious in a women's restroom at the police headquarters after overdosing.
The detective was administered multiple doses of Narcan and many officers attempted to keep
the officer alive.
The detective had been on death duty and is still in medical facility after receiving
treatment.
Her name hasn't been released at this time and the investigation is continuing.
Police Officer Odian.
Okay, here's the way I think that went down and you see if you think or not.
Yeah, the more I read it, I think I know.
Yeah.
Shook someone down, got their stash and then took it.
Right?
Yeah, see the way I was kind of reading into it is she was on white bitch duty anyway so
I'll take it she was possibly already on medication.
She just overdid it.
That's the way I'm thinking.
I don't know.
You never know.
Okay, if she was on death duty then yeah.
Pilled out per pharmacy.
Big pharmacologist.
Yeah, I think she just overdid her meds.
Okay, okay.
Well then, alright, then that makes some sense.
But it was, it just caught my eye.
That's a cool story.
That's the stuff that we like to make fun of and criticize and point a finger at so
thank you.
That story could go into it.
Alright, Rob, I got a question for you.
What's that?
You listen to every podcast, right?
Yeah.
Okay, you remember my fruit wars a while back where I was like walking through a Costco or
something and I'm sitting there in the produce section and I'm like looking at, I don't know,
a banana and a grape and trying to figure like if the banana jumped out and started
attacking the grape, who would win?
Well, I did it this time with vegetables.
So we will delve into that when we come back.
I'm going to get a free at home piercing kit.
That's right.
Free home piercing kit.
New from Gizbro.
May you always step in a wet spot after putting on fresh socks.
Two douchebags and a microphone.
The number one show for people that lie about their favorite podcast.
Alright, as for mentioned, I got some veggie wars here, you know, we did the fruit ones
quite a while back and I was walking through the produce aisle of Costco and next thing
I know I'm like, wow, you know, always wonder what fruits going to be to what fruit, right?
Well, this time I started looking at the veggies, I'm like, I want to know which vegetable is
the meanest.
So, I started thinking about it while I was looking around at that new butter cake thing
that they have, it looks fucking delicious.
Okay, so here's what I come up with and Rob, I want your input too.
Okay, some of these I have a definite answer on and some of them I don't, so we'll just
keep this shit show rolling like that, okay?
So number one, I have celery versus carrots.
I think a carrot would stomp celery's ass and just because it's bulkier, longer, and
firmer and meaner looking.
Yes, yeah, I got it really good job.
Yeah, you know, and also seeing the carrot being the aggressor, do you?
I could like see the carrot like going, hey, who the fuck put that celery next to me?
You know I don't like celery.
The celery's like, hey man, can we come on man, let's just talk this out.
I'm celery, I can't move.
They're like, no, no, no, no, man, you fucking get out of here, man, this is my fucking beat,
this is my place.
So, I think that the carrot would like be the aggressor, the carrot would jump out and
beat the shit out of the celery and then jump back in the bag and act like it didn't do
it.
Isn't that the way you sit?
Yeah, that's the way I sit.
Okay, alright, I'm glad we got that one figured out.
Okay, peas versus cauliflower.
I'm going to go, neither one of them's that threatening.
You know, I'm going to go with cauliflower.
I was going to go with cauliflower also, it's bigger.
Yeah, it's bigger and peas get mushy.
They just roll over the pea.
Yeah, but I could also see a scenario where there's like three peas and like four cauliflower
and the peas roll underneath them and trip them.
Yeah.
I'm still going cauliflower because I think peas just don't have enough inner strength,
even if they do trip them.
I think when they get them on the floor that the cauliflower is going to win anyhow.
So, what do you think?
You're still going with cauliflower or do you?
Yeah, I'm still going with cauliflower.
Okay, alright.
I think cauliflower is the steamhole.
Okay, this next one was a little rough, but I finally think I unraveled it enough to figure
out who was going to win.
Zucchini versus yellow squash.
I know.
Now, I went with zucchini only because it became somewhat of a phallic symbol.
You know, like a dildo replacement.
Yeah.
But I guess you could with yellow squash too, but you never hear about yellow squash being
a dildo.
You hear about zucchinis being a dildo.
Okay.
So, I'm just going to think because zucchini can do double duty that I'm going to hand
it to them and I think they just got a little bit more ump to their name because of that.
So, I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to go with zucchini crowning them the winner
over yellow squash.
But I think it'll be a tough battle.
I think it'll be a tough battle and I could see someone like fucking biting another one
while they're on the ground.
Like, I don't know, whatever they can get ahold of.
It doesn't matter if it's their ball sack, their inner leg, their asshole, whatever they
can bite, they're going to bite to win.
I see these two as scrappers.
Yeah, it would definitely be a tough battle.
Yeah.
So, I'm going to give the edge to zucchini, but this battle is going to last quite a while.
It's going to last a while.
So, this next one is a weird one because they're very similar.
Lettuce versus cabbage.
I'm going to go with cabbage.
Cabbage is just a little bit fuller and heavier.
I think at the end of the day, cabbage could sit on lettuce and win.
Yeah, the leaves just tickle.
Yes.
Yeah.
And I also think that cabbage isn't so much water like a head of lettuce is.
A head of lettuce is almost 100% water.
Where cabbage has a little bit more fiber, a little bit more substance.
So, I think that cabbage would win.
Yeah.
All right.
And also, cabbage makes you real gassy.
So, that also gives it the edge.
Yeah, that's true.
All right.
Cabbage it is.
All right.
The next one, I love this one.
Chili peppers versus bell peppers.
Now, you see chili peppers are narrower, maybe a little bit longer.
Bell peppers are wider.
But I think that chili peppers, you know, they're kind of, let's see, what would you call them?
There would be Latin maybe, Latino, something like that, a chili pepper.
Where a bell pepper would be some guy named Hank that lives down the road, right?
Yeah.
Okay.
I think that Hank would come up and then the chili pepper is like on his block or something, or I mean the bell pepper is on the chili pepper's block.
I think the chili pepper would fucking, I think the chili pepper would cut him.
I think he'd pull out a knife, a switch blade, and slice the bell pepper.
Yeah.
So I think the chili pepper, just because it doesn't take shit and it views the block as his, that he'll win.
All right.
Yeah.
All right.
You know, bell peppers are so straight laced.
Chili peppers are kind of like, they're kind of like the partiers, right?
Yep.
And they got a mean side too.
Yeah.
They drink like a fifth of Jack and then go looking for a fight with a bell pepper.
Yeah.
That's what they do.
They go, come on, come on, man.
Which one of you fucking pussies are going to come take it?
Come on, man.
They come up and just like start shit with a bell pepper, fucking smack one of them in the head and say, what are you going to do about it, bitch?
Right?
Yep.
Okay.
How about corn on a cob versus water chestnuts?
That's weird.
Now, could water chestnuts grab corn on the cob and drown them?
That might be mine.
Or is corn on the cob just too powerful?
I don't know. I'm going to put that one, a slight edge to corn on the cob because they may not be around water.
Now, I'm going to put this in there too though.
If they're around water, I give the edge to water chestnuts.
Because I think water chestnuts are tough enough that if they're near a body of water, they will pull the corn cob in the water and drown them.
That would make sense, yes.
Okay.
So the slight edge to corn, unless they're fighting near water, then if they're fighting near water, then we're going to go ahead and give a slight edge to water chestnuts.
Okay.
This next one, and I know which way you're going to go with it, and the same way I'm going to go with it.
Spinach versus kale.
Spinach will beat kale sissy's ass up one side and down another.
It will spit on its fucking mom.
It will kick its dog.
It will fuck its sister.
Right in front of it, and there's not a damn thing kale's going to say about it except whimper and run off.
Right?
Hello, are you there?
Yeah, hang on.
I'll get you back.
Okay.
I don't know.
I just lost my air pod.
Oh shit.
All of a sudden.
It just came back on.
I don't know what happened.
Okay.
You didn't hear any of that, did you?
No, I didn't.
Okay.
Here's what I said.
Spinach would beat the shit out of kale.
Spinach would fucking walk up, spit in kale's mom's face, kick the shit out of its dog, and fuck its sister right in front of it, and there ain't a damn thing that sissy ass little bitch kale is going to say to it.
Oh yeah.
Anything would beat kale.
Oh hell yeah.
Yeah.
A black grass would beat kale.
A piss ant.
All of them would beat kale.
So spinach is just going to knock the fuck out of kale.
And if kale's smart, it would go ahead and leave right now so it could be far enough away to not get its ass kicked by spinach.
So.
Yep.
Alright.
Next one.
Brussels sprouts versus asparagus.
And I've got a definite answer on this one.
I call it a draw.
Brussels sprouts are little fart bombs, and so is asparagus.
So.
I don't know.
I mean, you eat either one of them and you're fucked.
You really can't go out anywhere because you're going to be like tooting all over everybody and they're going to know it's you.
You know, sooner or later there's not going to be anyone around.
It's just you and the person or whoever.
And they're going to go, oh fuck it is him.
There's that smell again.
There's nothing you can do about it.
So, you know, I'm going to say that you put these two in a locked room to fight and don't get near them.
Yep.
Alright.
And finally.
Tomato versus cucumber.
Cucumber.
Mm hmm.
Because cucumbers are phallic symbols too.
They have been known to be switched out for dildos when the dildo wasn't around.
And also.
They just look meaner.
Now, though.
Tomatoes are awesome.
And tomatoes are also classified as a fruit.
So I almost didn't put them in there.
So I think it's kind of an unfair fight anyhow.
So, but.
You're going to go ahead and just say that cucumbers, if they ever had to cross pollinate.
And fight each other.
The cucumbers would have a definitive win.
Cucumbers would just smash the tomato.
Yeah.
Yes.
I would agree.
Yep.
So.
The next thing that I would like to go into coming up here.
Is this right here.
Okay.
We've had some changes here at two deuce bags and microphone, right?
Yes.
We're still hoping Topher will come back.
But there's not really a guarantee of that.
You know.
I talked to him and I'm still friends with him and everything.
And it's all ultimately it's up to him.
But we are still trucking on and we're doing well.
And you know if Topher ever wants to come back.
Like we said.
You know the seat is his.
And then Rob and I would probably do a podcast without him.
And then we'd do the regular one with him.
And then hopefully with Rob calling in.
But I mean you know at this point we you know we like everybody that we have.
And if Topher is to come back with that.
That's great.
We would love it.
And then like I said we'd incorporate everybody into the shit show.
Like I said before.
And then you guys are really fucked.
Because then like you got three deuce bags for the price of one.
So.
Yep.
Anyhow.
People might be wondering.
You know how we're doing here.
You know because we had a lot of changes.
And I've got to admit that I stole this from one of my favorite shows.
You know I have no qualms with telling you guys.
You know my influences was the 90's early 2000's radio.
Bubba the love sponge.
The man cows.
Even the Bob and Toms.
The Stearns.
The Johnny Dares.
The Max Tana Moffats.
And then earlier than that the Dick and Jays.
Let's see there was another show that was on KY when Dick and Jay quit for a while.
They came back.
I think it's Tom and John or something like that.
They were pretty good too.
The Randy Millers.
I can't forget Randy Miller.
Randy Miller was very good.
And I listened to him for quite a while too.
Yeah I did also.
And these are Kansas City stations by the way.
Yeah yeah well some of them were nationwide.
Bubba was never in Kansas City unfortunately.
But Bob and Tom was for a couple of months.
But the ratings fell so bad at the Fox that they had to can them.
Then bring in a local show that they made.
But anyhow I stole this from Bubba.
Bubba does this state of the Bubba.
That you know tells you how everything is going.
Well we're doing state of the douchebags.
So anyhow you know Topher left.
And this is no dog on him.
It hasn't really made any impact on our downloads.
We're still doing very well and right in about the same territory we've always been.
People seem to have adjusted to Rob pretty fine.
I mean I think that I would love to have Topher back too.
Because he brings a whole different area.
This podcast that I'm not able to do or Rob's not able to do.
He is more...me? I'm more like a dick joke guy.
You know fucking...just you know the guy down at the corner.
Where Topher is more of a sophisticated reserved sit back think stuff.
Read stuff.
There's just two different elements and I like that yin and yang.
Me and Rob are kind of both like kind of crude and kind of naughty.
And kind of rough around the edges.
Where you know we'd love to have someone like Topher back again.
You know and hopefully it will be Topher coming back.
So anyhow on that front we're doing very well.
We have some top markets that I was advised not to really mention the amount of people.
So I'll just say four digit territory or almost or not quite.
Or oops we got to get better at that one.
So of course our number one market is Kansas City with a bullet.
We do so well in Kansas City I can't believe how well we do.
You know I'd love to just say well it's just people I know.
Well I don't know that many people in Kansas City.
You know so it's...
Kansas City is a big place.
Yeah and I don't know how they even found out about the podcast.
Because to me we don't really advertise.
I mean we just we do our stuff at the city market.
And you know we're not on billboards.
We're not even up on pissers.
You know how they have those ads on pissers.
We don't even have our QR code sitting around for people to come up and scan them.
Like I saw some podcast.
We was in an airport somewhere me and Val and Val comes out and says man.
She goes in there in the bathroom there's these QR codes to podcasts.
People go up and she's seen people go up and hit the QR code to go download the podcast.
We don't even do that.
But Kansas City is our main market.
And I mean it's not even close.
How good we do in Kansas City.
I mean we are way up there.
I mean way up there in downloads.
And we have it divided too.
It's not exactly written like this at the RSS feed dot com that does this.
But Kansas City Missouri is the most.
Second is Kansas City Kansas.
And I have someone in Kansas City Kansas that is just fanatical about the show.
They've downloaded every show we've had.
And whoever you are when you hear this thank you.
Send me a mail.
Send me a mail at tbedouchebagsandamicrophone.net and come on the show man.
Tell us what you like about it.
Tell us what you don't like about it.
You have an open invite whoever you are in Kansas City Kansas.
Somewhere looks like somewhere near the Kansas River.
Whoever you are.
Come on.
We want to talk to you man.
Love to do a podcast with you.
So and then we have the surrounding areas which is about half of what the other two combined are.
So we have Kansas City which is Missouri which is huge.
Then we have Kansas City Kansas which is huge too.
But one fanatical listener.
Whoever you are thank you again.
And then we have the Kansas City surrounding areas which is about half of what those all are.
So anyhow and they're well deep.
They're way into the four digits.
Maybe even fives but I'm not going to say exactly.
The next one.
The next one is Ashburn North Carolina.
We're in four digit territory there.
So it can't be one person listening to us.
Not one person is going to download our shows like 50 times.
So I'm thinking what happens in something like this is like maybe it's a shop or something.
And you know and like people go home and listen to it and stuff like that.
And that's how you get so many downloads with no advertising.
So Ashburn North Carolina thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah that's excellent.
I mean those numbers are just insanely good.
Especially for a show with no budget on cheap software.
I mean the only thing that's expensive is like maybe our mics and the computer was pretty expensive.
But I mean we're doing this on a shoestring budget.
And I'm just overwhelmed that Ashburn North Carolina could love the show that much and represent so much in our ratings.
Thank you.
Next one is Council Bluffs Iowa.
Which is really close to Ashburn.
Only about 30 off.
About 30 downloads off.
Thank you Council Bluffs Iowa.
Love it up there.
Been there several times seeing concerts.
In North of Kansas City.
Yeah.
Yeah about two and a half hours up by 29 right before you get to Omaha you get to Council Bluffs.
Went to that famous Staves Barbecue there a couple of times.
Because well I was so freaking hungry after driving so far that I couldn't wait to go to a locally owned restaurant there.
Council Bluffs.
But the casinos there are cool.
I've seen concerts there.
I love Council Bluffs.
So thank you.
Then again everybody that I just mentioned even like the fanatical listener in KCK but anybody.
Send me an email.
Give me a number to call you.
I'll call you up man.
We'll have a podcast.
Tell me about yourself.
What you like about show.
What you don't like.
Whatever.
I don't care you know.
Count to 10.
Whatever fart.
The next one.
And this got to be a friend of mine.
Adrian Missouri.
You know Adrian Missouri right.
Yes.
Yes I do.
Adrian Missouri.
Four digit territory.
Yeah.
It can't be one person listening to us there.
It's got to be more.
How does a town of about 1200 people listen to our show that much.
I mean per capita if that was Kansas City I would probably have about a million listeners.
Geez.
Yeah.
Insane.
And they keep up with the show because every time I look back a couple more taken on I
throw another show out.
I go another couple of days.
It rose up again.
So you guys continue to listen to the show there in Adrian.
And thank you.
We're going to continue to try to do a great show for you and hopefully you love it.
We love it.
We love doing it.
I've been talking to people too and I've got people that's going to start checking it out.
Well Lake Ozark is a hotbed and I'll come up to that here in about seven or eight down.
OK.
Yeah.
I mean I've been sawing my cousin up in Atlantic Iowa.
Oh cool.
I'm going to be checking it out.
So yeah.
OK that's cool.
Well Lake Ozark I was surprised but that's how it's represented here at RSS.
The RSS feed that I have that I'm privy to.
Tofer set up.
Thank you Tofer if you're listening to this.
Tofer set it all up and did it brilliantly and it's all broke down.
And it just says Lake Ozark.
It doesn't say Camden 10.
It doesn't say what would be another one.
Oh well.
Anyhow you know I all need to go there.
The next one is Denver Colorado.
A lot of listeners there but not as much as Adrian Missouri.
Denver thank you for listening but Adrian Missouri is currently beating you by about 30.
Come on now.
Tell a friend or two.
Get them involved.
Listen we know you hate the Chiefs.
It's fine.
We can all love each other.
You can love your Broncos.
We can love our Chiefs.
But you can still listen to the podcast.
And then the ones where we're hugging the Chiefs.
Skip over.
Go to another one.
So Denver thank you.
And Denver has some good radio there too.
They have some good morning shows.
Some kind of honor to be in the world.
I'm sure they're enjoying their hierarchy old stories.
Oh I'm sure they're enjoying those.
Everybody is except my auntie.
Everybody enjoys those.
Yep.
So then the next one.
Brussels Belgium.
Really?
Yes.
Brussels Belgium.
A little bit over triple digits.
I cannot.
Or not.
Quadruple.
Four digits.
A little bit over four.
Yeah.
Hello.
So English speakers in Brussels who's listening to us thank you.
And if not then I guess our show probably sounds a little weird to you if you don't speak
English right?
So anyhow yeah.
I enjoyed that.
Brussels never been there.
Sure it's cool.
I have many friends that go there.
I have many friends that have been to Brussels Belgium.
They have great great great concert lineups.
They have festivals.
They're really serious about their beers and how you pour it.
Pretty cool.
I've heard some cool stories about Belgium from some really good friends of mine.
Next one.
ChiTown Chicago.
Thank you Chicago.
Chicago's had really great radio over the years too.
To be in such a ballpark in Chicago and especially here recently is accelerated.
Chicago might in like a month be our number well probably not past Kansas City but it
might be our number two market because it's just I think one person found it told some
other people they found it told some other people they found it and it's starting to
show Chicago's really come on strong.
Thank you.
It's quite an honor coming from Chicago because all you got to do is sit there and look at
the Radio Hall of Fame and see all the people is in Chicago burning that place up with their
fucking airwaves.
I mean it is famed the people that have come out of there and the people have dominated
the people have been through there.
You know I mean we spoke a man cow before but there's been a lot of other ones too that
are just very famous even Max Floyd was there for a while.
Did you know that Max Floyd was in Chicago.
I did not know Max Floyd was in Chicago.
It was quite a few years ago of course but yeah he did very well there also.
So thank you Chicago.
Keep telling your friends man I would love to see an even bigger presence.
I mean like I said the Chicago's accelerated in the last couple of weeks.
People are downloading much quicker and yeah thank you.
Next one Olathe, Kansas.
Someone over there really loves us or hates us because I know some people there that could
hate me too.
So either way you're downloading so doesn't care.
I don't care.
Maybe you're downloading to hear me fucking bash on you.
Who cares.
So be it.
Anyhow so Olathe I'm tipping my hat to you and if it could be someone else then I'm tipping
something else to you.
You fill in the blanks.
Alright.
Boardman.
I have no idea where Boardman is.
I've never heard of it.
B-O-A-R-D-M-A-N.
Hang on.
I've never heard of it.
Let me see if there's like a specific place it takes me to.
If I Google voice it hang on a second here.
Boardman.
As much fun as an electric can opener to the scrotum.
Two douchebags and a microphone.
Oh shit.
What's that over there?
Oh no.
It's the island of horrible jokes.
A ship telling red paint and a ship telling blue paint to light.
They were all moored.
Hey look.
I think we found land.
Oh my god.
I think we're safe.
Oh no.
It's the island of horrible jokes.
Why?
Can't it move?
It talkens as long.
Because then it would be a foot.
Well, guess they finally figured out the microphone.
Idiots.
Boardman.
What the hell?
Boardman.
Okay, I'm going to have to type it in.
Because I think.
I found a Boardman organ.
Oh.
Maybe that's what it is.
Yeah.
Yep.
Boardman organ.
Okay.
Boardman bicycle.
Boardman organ I guess.
Thank you.
I wonder if it's a like a outer skirt of Portland or something.
Well anyhow, wherever you're Boardman, thank you.
You guys are doing very well.
We appreciate it.
Let's see.
What's the next one?
Wichita.
Okay.
Thank you Wichita.
We appreciate you guys listening.
I like Wichita.
Wichita is a fun town.
Home of Larry's Burgers.
Oh shit.
We did a job there, me and my friend Sandor.
And we wanted to get this apron so bad.
If you ate a Larry Burger and all the fries.
And a Larry Burger is like a quadruple huge burger.
And if you ate that whole thing with the fries, they gave you an apron.
A Larry Burger apron.
And me and Sandor tried and tried and tried to eat that son of a bitch.
We left there sick every damn time.
But yeah, I don't even know why we did.
We didn't even give a shit.
We just wanted to win it and that was all.
So anyway, anyone listening in Wichita, thank you.
You guys are doing good.
Tell more people.
Next one.
Lake Ozark.
Alright, alright.
So yay.
Woo yeah.
Lake Ozark.
Lake Ozark beat out Overland Park.
Wow.
Yeah, how about that?
So Overland Park.
On the Lake Ozark, it could be people traveling down here.
Yeah, it could be.
Actually, I thought of that too.
And there's enough numbers that it could be that too.
So anyhow, I mean it's more than what you just described a little bit ago.
So it's probably just that.
I mean it's probably people traveling down there.
And I know I do this all the time.
Driving to Eureka Springs or later on this year.
We'll probably drive to Memphis to go see Wasp again.
Me and Davey.
So when we do that, I'm going to be Googling different podcasts and just listening to them like I always do.
And Overland Park.
This could be some people who are listening that hate me.
If you love me, I tip my hat to you.
If you're one of the ones that hate me and just want to hear me bash you, then I tip something else to you.
You fill in the blank.
And then, oh better yet, either way, write me an email.
Want to hear from you?
Whether you're the one that I hate or you're the one that I love.
Doesn't matter.
Either way, I love it.
Write me an email.
Tell me how bad I suck.
I would love to read that.
It would make me feel really good if you hated me.
So anyhow, non-available.
A lot of NAs.
There's so much, it's right below Overland Park and Lake Ozark.
So I don't know.
They're firewall.
I don't know what the hell.
So anyhow, some people cannot be identified listening to us.
So okay.
So anyhow, unavailable.
I have no idea because it's not available.
Next one.
Columbus.
I do believe it could be Georgia.
But probably Ohio.
There's a big number in Columbus listening to us.
I guess it could be Georgia too.
But unfortunately, this RSS information here that I get does not say the state.
It just says the name of the city.
That's the first one that popped in my head.
Yeah.
So I'm going to go with Columbus, Ohio.
But I'll also say it could be Georgia.
And there's other Columbuses too.
There's quite a few Columbuses.
So I'm just going to go to Ohio.
And listen, if you're in a Columbus that's not Ohio, email me.
Let me know.
I'll take my words back.
I'll thank whoever.
Next one.
And now we're getting into the threes.
We're out of the fours of digits.
Blue Springs.
I have family in Blue Springs.
That could explain some of it.
I have family in Blue Springs also.
Maybe it's both our families together.
They're listening together.
They're having big parties.
They're getting together.
And they want one of us to transition and marry the other one.
Okay.
That's what it is.
Right?
My family knows.
They're going to expect it out of me anyway.
No.
And also there's this other little thing.
And I'm already married anyhow.
And also we'd have to fight who had to become the female, right?
We'd have to have a fist fight.
That'd be a tough one.
Yeah.
Okay.
The next two ones are not available.
Okay.
I mean, well, I guess we could have a male on male marriage, right?
A bromance.
Anyhow, we have two NAs here.
And they're both, these non-available, sure listen a lot.
Thank you.
Thank you wherever you're not at.
Whoever you are.
Yeah.
Next one.
St. Louis.
All right.
Yeah.
Yep.
So thank you, St. Louis.
We know you don't have Bob and Tom anymore and you're awful sad.
So keep them coming.
Keep them coming.
We'll keep the funny coming at you and you keep coming back.
All right?
We'll turn her back.
People say I sound just like Christy Lee.
So.
Okay.
Next one.
Grandview.
Right on.
Well, Grandview is pretty self-explanatory.
Unless you're this one loser I used to work with and eat a dick.
But keep listening.
That could be coming from both sides of us.
Yeah.
Yep.
Eat a dick but keep listening.
Next one.
San Fran.
Really?
Yeah.
San Fran.
Even though all the fun we make out of there, all their stupid shit going on there and all
the ha-ha and all the ridicule and all the finger pointing, they still listen.
Thank you.
We're going to keep the shit.
We're going to keep the bullshit up.
Obviously you like us ridiculing you.
So.
If you notice, we don't pick on any certain people.
We pick on everybody.
Oh, no.
We pick on anything that fucking moves.
We are not prejudiced.
No.
Not at all.
Matter of fact, I mean, if you want to get down to it, I think I pick on Joe Whitey more
than anybody.
Like I said, I'm staying away from politics.
Okay.
You know what?
Very well said.
Me too.
I mean, I'll give you my opinion on what both sides are, but that's about it.
Yeah.
Next one.
Minneapolis.
I'm sorry.
You're not Minneapolis.
Minneapolis.
Thank you.
Beautiful city.
Been there a few times.
I've been to Minneapolis.
Yep.
So, yeah.
Thank you.
It is a beautiful city, isn't it?
Yes.
It really was.
Yep.
Then to Mall, Mall, America.
That place is awesome.
Yeah.
Yep.
Good place.
Lenexa.
Thank you.
Another, another Overland Park, you know, or not Overland Park, but another suburb to
Kansas City on the Kansas side.
Pretty nice.
Nice homes there.
Nice schools.
Nice quaint little, well, it's not little.
I think it's probably got at least 50,000 people.
But anyhow, thank you, Lenexa.
Good numbers from there.
Solid.
It's definitely growing over the years.
Yep.
And I think it's going to be a lot of people are like what Jim Rumsay, keep it coming.
I feel you.
Thank you.
All right.
Next one.
Good old NA available again.
Non-available.
Well, thank you, non-available.
We certainly, I don't know why they can't put the NA's all together.
Why they got to segregate.
I'm sure the NA's are feeling kind of lonely.
I mean, half of their family spread out.
You know, like, like all the grand views are together.
All the Kansas cities are together, all the blue springs are together.
But NA doesn't get that.
NA is from a broken home and it hurts.
We need to find NA.
If you add them all together, there's probably more than everybody.
Yeah.
NA, we love you and we hope you find your other family.
We do.
Yes.
We sympathize for you.
We can help.
We'll do our best.
Damn you, RSS.
Quit breaking up the NA's.
It's not fair.
Anyhow, Indianapolis, or Indian-crapple-us.
We got some listeners there.
Well, thank you for interrupting your Bob and Tom cast to come this way.
Appreciate it.
Or, Bob with the new Tom.
No, RSS.
Well, they added a Tom.
First off, when Bob and Tom got into the radio hall of fame, the next day, Tom retired.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah.
So, for a while there they didn't have a Tom.
So, then they added another guy named Tom, who isn't nearly as prolific, but he's somewhere
in the background there because actually it's...
Oh, no, no.
Bob.
Bob retired.
Not Tom.
Oh, okay.
So, anyhow, so let's see.
Bob Kavoyan, I think his name is.
Anyhow, well, anyhow, Bob retired.
So then for about a year or so there was no Bob.
It was just Tom.
But they kept the name Bob and Tom and they just relied on Chick and Christy Lee.
And Christy Lee left for a while too, but then they got her back.
They talked her into coming back.
So when this happened, I think people started realizing there was no Tom or there was no
Bob.
So they brought back another character, another guy, and his name is Bob something else.
And so it's Bob and Tom again.
But the thing is, for a while there they're running with just Tom and Chick and Christy.
And they didn't even run with Christy for a while there too.
So anyhow, but now they've got like another lineup and anyhow, it's still the same thing
though.
A lot of comedians go on there and stuff, but it's still entertaining.
I still like it.
I mean, it's just it's not what it once was, but it's still okay.
So anyhow, so Indianapolis, thank you.
Pacific.
I don't know where Pacific is.
I don't know.
Anyhow, there's a few listeners there.
Westminster.
Oh, maybe it's that.
I don't know.
There's Westminster and that's in the United States.
I was thinking it was like in, you know, Britain or something, but no.
Next one is Belton.
Quite a few listeners there.
Thank you.
I know some of the listeners in Belton and I thank you.
So next one is Tulsa.
Love Tulsa.
Fun town.
Seen Wafs there last year.
Great show.
It's a great place to be at.
Had a really good hotel room there.
Really nice hotel room.
Really cheap too.
I couldn't believe how cheap the hotel room was.
I think it was like it was under a hundred bucks and it was like a downtown, I think
it was a double tree downtown.
Very nice convention center with it.
So anyhow.
I was in the radio station from time to time at Tulsa.
Oh, 1045?
10330 Eagle.
Oh, you can pick that up there too?
I heart radio.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
Well, as you're driving down I-49, it's weird because 1045, the rock or the laser, whatever
it is, will come in and bleed over stations around there a lot down I-49.
But you have to be down there probably about 10 miles north of Joplin.
It comes in really good and then you lose it down near Joplin and then you get into
Oklahoma territory.
You know where they have the huge over I-44 McDonald's?
Yes.
You can start picking it up really good there again, but it's weird how it bleeds over,
all the way over the other side of Joplin on I-49 about 10 miles, I shouldn't say Joplin,
10 miles north of the I-44, I-49 interchange because Joplin's still like 10 miles away
from there.
It's down I-44 a little ways.
But it's really weird how it bleeds over so well and it comes in like the stations right
next door.
Oh.
Hey, the next one is Independence.
We do really well there.
Thank you, Independence.
I know people in Independence that might be listening.
If you're one of them, thank you.
I don't know if you do the 3-D.
Next one, Topeka.
Topeka's solid triple digits.
Thank you, Topeka.
All right.
Thank you.
Next one, Mission and that would be Mission, Kansas, I'm pretty sure.
Yes.
Next one, Paris, France.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, I think I know who that is.
I think I know who that is.
It is Rob, I think, another Rob.
I think he works on oil platforms maybe and he keeps threatening to come down to City
Market and do a podcast with us.
So I'd love for him to do a podcast with us because pretty intelligent guy and I like
to get some of his stories about being overseas.
So next one, Columbia, home of Joe Malkin.
Joe Malkin who has the incredible lounge and the people that will get you a case of White
Castles if you demand it.
Thank you.
Yep.
Next one, this is a town I know well and I bet you know well too because I used to stay
there around Table Rock Lake and it's called Kimberlein City.
Yes.
Matter of fact, my good buddy Bob who is no longer with us used to have a place there.
Do what?
I used to live right up the road in Reet Spring.
Mmm.
Yeah, home of Spanky's.
2002, 2003.
Home of Spanky's or was home of Spanky's.
Yes.
Have you ever been to Spanky's?
No, I never went there.
Oh my God.
This is where I saw a chick with a huge cesarean scar and one of them that had a peg leg and
a botched boob job, missing teeth.
We ran out of the...
I was married with three kids and oh no, I did not go there.
We ran out of that place dude.
That place is fucking scary.
Oh I think it's called Spank's.
I'm not even sure it was called Spanky's.
That place was fucking hideous.
I don't think it's there anymore for other streets.
I heard stories.
I'm not kidding you man.
One chick had one boob large, one small.
One of them was missing a leg.
A lot of them had huge cesarean scars, missing teeth.
It was horrible.
Yeah, yeah.
So anyhow, next one Los Angeles.
I'm a little disappointed.
Los Angeles is a huge city.
I mean we're in the triple digits.
We should be in four or fives.
So anyhow, but anyhow, listening there, thank you.
Next one is Provo.
And Provo is Utah, which is Salt Lake City area.
In Salt Lake City area we talked to some people from there on a podcast and they were going
to listen so that is probably them and their friends.
So thank you.
Next one is Nashville.
Nashville, calm the hell down.
They were on fire there, but we haven't been to the Filthy Bean in a while.
So right, we need to make it.
Yeah, but there was a bunch of stragglers.
They're still in the threes, but not that high.
Like I said, Nashville, Carlisle, which I don't know.
It's United Kingdom, Washington, DC, Baltimore, Ironton, somewhere in the United States.
Another not available.
Salonica, Greece.
That could be a relative of mine.
Yeah, that could be a relative of mine.
So but I don't know for sure, but I don't think that they would do all of them in Salonica.
But anyhow, well, anyhow, Salonica, Greece.
Thank you.
Relative or not.
Cedar Rapids, Iowa.
Cool place.
Let's see.
Salem, North Carolina, I think.
Plato, Rich Hill, St. Joseph, Manhattan, Springfield.
Hey, I wonder if St. Joseph's your ex-wife.
I know other people up there, too.
Yeah, it could be any of them.
Well, thank you, St. Joe.
Thank you.
Springfield, Missouri.
Salt Lake City.
Iola, Kansas.
I think I know who that is.
Thank you.
You know who you are.
Westchester, United States.
Marietta, United States.
Ocala.
I think probably Florida.
Yeah, that's it.
Yeah, Ocala, Florida.
Yeah, yeah.
Home of Bubba Raceway.
Home of Bubba Raceway Park.
Owasso.
My home is Doha.
We're home down there.
Oh, okay.
Miami.
And I think it's Miami and not Miami as in Oklahoma, but I don't know for sure.
Toronto.
Thank you.
Alexandria, Virginia.
We know you.
Jacksonville, we know you.
Dulles.
I've heard of Dulles before, but I don't know where it's at.
It's not just an airport.
I don't know.
Roanoke.
Now, there's a Roanoke area in Kansas City, but I think this would be the city.
Hollywood.
Got a few there.
Italy.
Tresulli.
Tresulli, Italy.
Thank you.
Portia, Italy.
Thank you.
Grand Rapids, Michigan, I would think.
Thank you.
Westmont, whatever that is.
Thank you.
New York, New York.
I'm disappointed in you guys.
There's a lot of people there that could be listening.
You're in the threes.
All good.
Cleveland, Ohio or Missouri could be either one.
Don't know.
Scottsdale, Arizona.
Thank you.
Strasbourg, France.
Or Strasborg, France.
Let's see.
Corona, United States.
Let me see some.
Sydney, Australia.
Greenwood, I think that's a family member of Lexington, Kentucky.
Mountain Grove, I know who that is.
Nixa, I know who that is.
Yates Center is a very small town in Kansas.
Don't know who that is.
So anyhow, thank you all for listening.
So thank you very much.
And remember, everyone that just heard their names called out, Rob Radd wants male body
part pictures in his inbox.
But not just that.
Ass up with face, preferably.
Cheeks split out.
Face turned around.
Big shitty grin.
Two emotionally disturbed dirtbags in a popsicle will be right back.
Hey, where do they go?
Where are the douchebags?
Oh my God, someone took a dump in the corner.
Oh jeez.
Glad they're gone.
Let's just hope they don't come back.
Man, that smells.