1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,000 Music 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:12,000 Hi everybody and welcome to Redeemed Through His Blood. 3 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:17,000 In this podcast we discuss hope, healing and redemption through the atonement of Jesus Christ. 4 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:24,000 My name's Scott Durfey. I want to introduce my partner in this project, our more than capable teacher, 5 00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:26,000 Brother David Durfey. Say hi, Dave. 6 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:34,000 I'm so thankful to be here, Scott. Good morning everybody. I look forward to our discussion and topic today. 7 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:43,000 Maybe the most important lesson I've ever learned in my life has to do with what we're going to talk about today. 8 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:49,000 I would probably endorse that whole hearted leave from my own life experience as well, Dave. 9 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:53,000 We're both really excited to talk about what we're talking about today. 10 00:00:53,000 --> 00:01:04,000 We're approaching this topic with a lot of care and a lot of prayer and seeking a lot of direction from our Heavenly Father as we do it. 11 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:09,000 We hope that it touches your hearts the way that it has touched ours over our lives. 12 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:14,000 Before we get started though, I want to just thank you for the emails that we've received. 13 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:18,000 We have received a lot of great emails and appreciate it. 14 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:23,000 I know some of those have been helping us to have ideas to maybe even get better. 15 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:32,000 A brother from Wyoming has sent us a request and I think that we're going to be able to figure out a way to accommodate that eventually down the road. 16 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:35,000 So thank you for that and all others. 17 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:42,000 Also, we want to thank you for the questions that you've been sending us that have to do with the topics that we've been discussing. 18 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:53,000 We look forward to implementing and integrating those questions. We'll even deal with a few of them completely directly in episodes to come. 19 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:54,000 So thank you for that. 20 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000 I encourage you to continue to do that. 21 00:01:56,000 --> 00:02:04,000 You can always reach us at heredeemsusatgmail.com. 22 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:13,000 Another thing that I haven't mentioned over the last few weeks because we've been on a bit of a summer hiatus for those of you who are listening to this in the winter. 23 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:22,000 Forgive me for that reference, but we do need to encourage you again if you're involved in social media at all. 24 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,000 We do have a Facebook page. 25 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,000 It's called Redeem Through His Blood. 26 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:28,000 We also have an Instagram page. 27 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:37,000 We have many followers there and a lot of great works being put forth there by our cousin, Dave's niece, Cherie Curtis. 28 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:44,000 We want to give her a shout out and say a special thanks to her for all of her efforts there. 29 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:51,000 So last week we talked about it was our part two on what repentance is not. 30 00:02:51,000 --> 00:03:00,000 We had a great discussion around a lot of things there, some real key takeaways that we've been getting from a lot of you and your emails. 31 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:04,000 I want to just remind you to if you haven't already go back and listen to that. 32 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:06,000 Listen to part one and part two. 33 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:09,000 We have sandwiched in between their fun interview. 34 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,000 I don't know if fun is the right adjective. 35 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:17,000 It was fun, but it's a deeply moving interview with a brother, Scott Harmon. 36 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:25,000 For those of you who don't know, this is not just one week each week stands on its own kind of podcast. 37 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:37,000 Although it does, it's important I think for us to reemphasize or reiterate that these really kind of build one concept or one week on the other in many ways. 38 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,000 Encourage those of you who are just joining us. 39 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,000 First off, we want to say welcome. 40 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:54,000 We've had just an absolute influx of new listeners recently and want to thank our veteran listeners for inviting you all, our new listeners to be with us and encourage you to do the same to your friends as well. 41 00:03:54,000 --> 00:04:00,000 But I wanted to just reemphasize that if you were to go back to even episode one, episode one is Easter. 42 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:09,000 And there we have an intimate walk with Jesus Christ in the holy week in preparation for that great last sacrifice. 43 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,000 And we talk about all of the events there. 44 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:20,000 And then we come back in episodes two, three, four, and so on and begin to build on these concepts. 45 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:33,000 And so, you know, again, although each episode is intended and does indeed stand on its own to get a more complete experience, we encourage you to go back to those earlier episodes and listen to the entire thing. 46 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:37,000 So let me just endorse what you just said, Scott. 47 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:45,000 You know, I don't really even see this as a podcast as much as I see it as a course of study. 48 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:56,000 And this is based on a course that I designed many, many years ago in Answer to Priesthood Leaders' Inquiry. 49 00:04:56,000 --> 00:05:07,000 What can the Institute of Religion do to help our students and our young adults in young adult stakes? 50 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:21,000 What can we do to help them to access the power of Christ's Atonement through faith in Christ and repentance and to help them overcome some of the sins of this generation? 51 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:32,000 I mean, so I see this as kind of a course. And today we're going to be talking about reasons why people don't repent. 52 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:40,000 And that's, I think there's amazing lessons that can be applied from just this singular podcast. 53 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:46,000 But it is just a small part of the whole course. 54 00:05:46,000 --> 00:06:01,000 So to really appreciate the course, I agree with Scott and encourage all of us to kind of remember the foundation upon which we're building this podcast and this course of study. 55 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:13,000 And it's based upon knowing who you are and knowing who God is and knowing our relationship with Him and knowing the plan of redemption 56 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:18,000 and that He sent His Son and that we're all fallen and we need redemption. 57 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:25,000 That redemption is through, it's not through assimilation. 58 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:33,000 That redemption is not by just living a good life. Lots of people live good lives. 59 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:37,000 But redemption is through Jesus Christ and His blood. 60 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:49,000 And then we talked about what the Savior did for us, the sacrifice He made for us, and the faith that is required in Him and His atonement. 61 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:59,000 And now we're kind of getting into where the rubber meets the road and how we can repent through faith in Christ and His atonement. 62 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:12,000 So I just really encourage all of our listeners and sometimes even those who have listened every week to maybe sometimes go back and listen to some of the ones again that maybe would be helpful to them. 63 00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:15,000 I know that's happening actually, Dave. 64 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:24,000 I talked to a bishop and a ward here locally just the other day who took actually three of these podcasts and used it as part of their fifth Sunday. 65 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:33,000 And I know that the members of that ward were really grateful for his insights and the ability for him to kind of perpetuate these things that way as well. 66 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:47,000 Well, our only real objective is to be a blessing, to bless others and to help priest and leaders and individual members of the church, strong and weak in the faith, 67 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:57,000 to develop a closer relationship with Jesus Christ and understand the plan of redemption more fully than we do. 68 00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:02,000 And all of us are continually learning and growing together here. 69 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,000 Yeah, that's exactly right. 70 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:15,000 Well, we are, as I mentioned earlier, we're really excited to talk about what we're going to talk about here today because, you know, oftentimes when it comes to repentance, you know, and again, let's just reiterate, 71 00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:19,000 it's not repentance that redeems us, it's Jesus Christ that redeems us. 72 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:32,000 Repentance helps us turn away from those things that does not allow the spirit to be completely in our lives, thereby putting on the atonement of Jesus Christ, which we have talked about so much here. 73 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:38,000 But what repentance does, and I said that, what repentance does is bring us closer to him. 74 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:44,000 But sometimes, and I know I've had this experience in my life, I think we all do. 75 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:50,000 Sometimes there are stumbling blocks, roadblocks, that kind of get in our way to repenting. 76 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:59,000 And there are a couple of major ones that I think that we're able to distill this down to that I think is more of a universal experience. 77 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:13,000 The things that we'll be talking about today at some level, I believe every human being that's ever walked the face of the earth, or ever will walk the face of the earth, will and has experienced some of the things that we'll be talking about today. 78 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,000 So David, let's get rolling in that. 79 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,000 Well, so thanks Scott. 80 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:28,000 So when I would teach this lesson, I would always begin with a question, which is, let's, before we talk about really what about what repentance is and the process of repentance. 81 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:34,000 Let's identify some of the reasons why people don't repent. 82 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:44,000 What are some of the reasons you don't repent and if it makes it easier for you to respond and us to have a discussion, tell me why your best friend doesn't repent. 83 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,000 Right. 84 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,000 As always. 85 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:49,000 Or tell me why someone in your family doesn't repent. 86 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:55,000 So anyway, that would always be an interesting discussion and lots of participation. 87 00:09:55,000 --> 00:10:07,000 And every semester, I would get a probably a list of about 15 reasons, pretty specific reasons why people wouldn't repent. 88 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,000 And I did that for many semesters. 89 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:18,000 And so I kind of made it a took all of those together and oftentimes the same reasons were given semester after semester after semester. 90 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:26,000 But I took an accumulation of all of those and I made a PowerPoint out of it and began to use a PowerPoint. 91 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:36,000 And after a class had given me all their reasons, I would put this slide up on the screen and I would say, OK, let's let's study all these reasons. 92 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:40,000 What stands out to you? 93 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,000 What common threads do you see? 94 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:49,000 What what patterns do you see in these reasons, rationalizations or excuses? 95 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,000 Why people don't repent? 96 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:57,000 And as they took a few minutes, you know, we would just sit in silence for a few minutes. 97 00:10:57,000 --> 00:11:04,000 And as they studied that list, they would always come back and the first answers would be and there would there would be several. 98 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:18,000 But the two main common patterns in why people don't repent identified by my students was fear and pride, fear and pride. 99 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:39,000 And I began to then develop after that a lesson to help students to overcome their fear of repenting and their fear of their pride and how to overcome those those reasons why people wouldn't repent. 100 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:44,000 So anyway, I think this is a really important discussion. 101 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:53,000 And while I was in the middle of teaching that course, Scott, I was ordained a patriarch and I thought I knew something about fear. 102 00:11:53,000 --> 00:12:03,000 But this became the singular most important lesson of my life that I have learned learned in all my life. 103 00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:09,000 And I just want to briefly share it and and then get into some scriptures about this. 104 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:16,000 So when I was called to be a patriarch, I was told to not give any blessings until I was ready. 105 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:30,000 And I didn't really know what that meant, but I went and I tried to try to get ready reading scriptures and and increasing trying to increase the effectiveness of my my prayer and worship and try to get the spirit of the Lord. 106 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:41,000 And and I didn't know if I was making progress or not. In fact, I felt like I was maybe beginning to lose a little ground in my spirituality. 107 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:53,000 And I don't want to sensationalize this by saying I really felt like I was being attacked by Satan just more in my thoughts and feelings. 108 00:12:53,000 --> 00:13:03,000 And one day my sweetheart, Chris called me out on it. I was a little short with her or I was just not being very nice. 109 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:09,000 I don't know. I can't remember the details, but she called me out on it and it just broke my heart. 110 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:20,000 And she said, David, why are you so on re you've been so much more on re since you were ordained to be a patriarch. 111 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:28,000 And that not only broke my heart, but it really got my attention because I knew what she was saying was true. 112 00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:35,000 So I really struggled with it, wrestled with it and I became increasingly frustrated. 113 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:42,000 And I just said to her one day, Chris, I've got to get away. I don't know what's wrong with me. 114 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:50,000 And I've got to go. I got to go get some things right. I've got to go. I just need some time alone. 115 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:55,000 And I didn't know how long I'd be gone or where I was going to go. But I got in the car and started to drive. 116 00:13:55,000 --> 00:14:02,000 And I remember a few hours later, ended up in a parking lot. I was praying and weeping. 117 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:11,000 I didn't really know what was wrong with me, but I've taken the scriptures with me because I guess maybe another one of the greatest lessons I've learned is that 118 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:19,000 answers not only answers to our questions, but solutions to our problems are found in the scriptures. 119 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:27,000 I don't know of any exceptions to that, Scott. And so I was led to this scripture and I read the scripture and I got my attention because 120 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:35,000 the revelation given through the prophet Joseph Smith, the David Whitmer and his brothers and the first verse starts out, 121 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:42,000 Behold, I say unto you, David, well, I got my attention. And so I continued to read, 122 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:50,000 You have feared man and have not relied on me for strength as you ought. 123 00:14:50,000 --> 00:15:00,000 Wow. That really struck me. And I knew immediately what my problem was that I was afraid, 124 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:09,000 that I had to allow fear to come into my heart and that fear was blocking me, 125 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:15,000 keeping me from feeling the spirit of the Lord. And this goes on this verse, 126 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:19,000 his passage is in Doctrine and Covenants section 30 verses one through three. 127 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:23,000 I'm just reading parts of it here. And the Lord says, 128 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:30,000 But your mind has been on the things of the earth more than on the things of me. 129 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:37,000 It also reads, You have not given heat unto my spirit. And then it says in verse three, 130 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:46,000 Wherefore you are left to inquire for yourself. Well, that, that, that just described perfectly. 131 00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:49,000 Yeah. My situation and what I was feeling. Let me ask you a question, Dave. 132 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:54,000 You say that you identified that as fear. That's pretty broad. What were you afraid of? 133 00:15:54,000 --> 00:16:01,000 So I had so many fears and I also discovered after really pondering this, Scott, 134 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:07,000 that that fear and pride are inextricably linked. 135 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:08,000 Twins. 136 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:18,000 At least that's that's actually the chapter in Elder Anderson's book is that Elder Anderson wanted to title this chapter in his book, 137 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,000 The Twin Bullies. 138 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:25,000 So just real quickly, what book we are referring to, and you'll hear us refer to this quite frequently, 139 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:30,000 it's called The Divine Gift of Forgiveness by Elder Neil L. Anderson. 140 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:34,000 Again, The Divine Gift of Forgiveness by Elder Neil L. Anderson. 141 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:42,000 Great stuff in here. Dave was very instrumental in the compiling of the information and all of that for this book itself. 142 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:52,000 This is the actually the context that is used in that Institute class or excuse me, not context, but this is actually the curriculum, the book, the guide, the class guide. 143 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,000 What would you call it? 144 00:16:53,000 --> 00:17:11,000 Yeah, well, this is this is some of the course material that was used in the course Elder Anderson certainly refined it, improved it and and it's I know it's inspired and prophetic because of of Elder Anderson's authority in the revelation. 145 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:17,000 And I helped more, I guess, with the organization than anything of the book. 146 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:24,000 But it was grateful to be able to meet with him regularly and discuss these these important chapters. 147 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:27,000 But the chapter of that book is entitled the what's it called? 148 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:31,000 It's called Twin Bullies, wanting to prevent our repentance. 149 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:37,000 And of course, those twin bullies that he refers to is just as Dave is speaking about his fear and pride. 150 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:41,000 So again, Dave, the things that you were fearful, what were those? 151 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:48,000 So I found out my fear and pride was was related and that my fears were based on my pride, right? 152 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:53,000 Such as, well, what if I give a revelation and it's and it hurts the individual? 153 00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:59,000 What if I give a revelation, give a patriarchal blessing and they don't like it? 154 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,000 What if I give a patriarchal blessing and it ruins somebody's life? 155 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,000 What if I'm not worthy to do this? 156 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:08,000 What if I fail at this fear, fear, fear, fear? 157 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:10,000 There were so many fears based on this. 158 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:15,000 It's the scariest calling that anyone can ever receive. 159 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:20,000 I believe that of all the callings I've received. 160 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:23,000 It's the scariest calling, I think, in the church. 161 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,000 Yeah, I bet. 162 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:30,000 But in so often those fears, when we talk about them in hindsight, they seem irrational, right? 163 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:35,000 I mean, for example, you just said, what if I ruin somebody's life with a blessing? 164 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:38,000 Has anybody's life been ruined with a blessing? 165 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,000 I don't know. 166 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,000 You know what I mean. 167 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,000 I don't know. 168 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,000 Maybe. 169 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,000 I don't think so. 170 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,000 Anyway, these fears we're talking about Scott are irrational. 171 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,000 So let me just let me just say up front. 172 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:50,000 So we're not misunderstood. 173 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:58,000 You know, some fears are good and we're not talking about the fear of the Lord here because fear of the Lord means in the scriptures. 174 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:07,000 If you interpret that, if you if you translate that with the Hebrew and the Greek means to revere or to respect or to reverence the Lord. 175 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,000 So we're not talking about that kind of fear. 176 00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,000 And we're not talking. 177 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:12,000 There are some positive fears. 178 00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:15,000 There's some natural human positive fears. 179 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:24,000 The prophet Joseph Smith said the fear of death was a gift given to us by God so that individuals would be less inclined to take their lives. 180 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:30,000 I mean, I mean, there are some fears that are positive that protect us literally protect us. 181 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,000 Absolutely. 182 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:37,000 But I'm describing in our discussion today irrational fears. 183 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:42,000 And I believe that Satan can put fears in our hearts. 184 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:51,000 I know that some are just totally manmade human fears that we that we have because of the world that we live in. 185 00:19:51,000 --> 00:20:03,000 I believe that if Satan can put thoughts into my mind that he can also through my thoughts that he can put fear into my heart. 186 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,000 And that's what I was experiencing, Scott. 187 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:14,000 I was having thoughts that I that were extremely negative and doubtful about my abilities and my relationship. 188 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,000 And and I was filled with fear. 189 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:37,000 So when I read this passage, I knew what my challenge was and I determined there in that car that day in the middle of some parking lot that I was going to make it a study that I knew that I could through the power of the word and the scriptures that I could get some revelation and some direction. 190 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:45,000 So I started the study and after studying the topic of fear and being afraid in the scriptures. 191 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:50,000 That was the two topics I studied fear and being afraid. 192 00:20:50,000 --> 00:21:05,000 I discovered that 127 times in the standard works, we are commanded to fear not or to be not afraid. 193 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:15,000 Well, that that was impressive to me and it's over and over again in the scriptures in all four standard works of the church. 194 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:20,000 We are commanded to fear not or to be not afraid. 195 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:35,000 And a few of those that got my attention, one of my favorites, which everyone I think can relate to and know is Matthew chapter 14 verses 22 through 23. 196 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:40,000 We read this experience, which happens in the fourth watch or early in the morning. 197 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:50,000 Jesus is walking towards them as he walks towards them. He speaks to them. This is verse 27. 198 00:21:50,000 --> 00:22:02,000 But straightway Jesus spake unto his disciples who who were experiencing some fear because they saw what they they didn't know who he was or where this was a spirit that they were seeing. 199 00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:12,000 And Jesus spake unto them saying, Be of good cheer. It is I be not afraid. 200 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:18,000 There's one of the 127 times were commanded to fear not or be not afraid. 201 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:26,000 And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou bid me come unto thee on the water. 202 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:35,000 I love Peter is he knew that if Christ commanded him, he can do it. Christ asked him the faith that he had. 203 00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,000 It's it's incredible. 204 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:43,000 Yeah, verse 29 and he said Jesus said, come. 205 00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:50,000 And when Peter was come down out of the out of the ship, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. 206 00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:56,000 Verse 30, but I've got that circle to my scriptures. 207 00:22:56,000 --> 00:23:02,000 But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid. 208 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:11,000 And beginning to sink, he cried saying, Lord, save me. 209 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:21,000 And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand and caught him and said unto him, Oh, thou of little faith. 210 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:24,000 Wherefore didst thou doubt? 211 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:29,000 And when they were come into the ship, the wind ceased. 212 00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:40,000 Well, I know that there are so many boisterous waves that capture our attention as we're trying to follow Jesus as we're 213 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:54,000 striving to do hard things to sacrifice and to to live and keep the commandments and so many boisterous waves that distract us from all of that. 214 00:23:54,000 --> 00:24:04,000 Scott and and those distractions can really put fears into our into what do people think about me fear of missing out. 215 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,000 I'm going to miss out on on a fun time. 216 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:18,000 I'm going to miss out on this or I'm going to write FOMO the famous FOMO fear of missing out fear of missing this fear of losing fear of failing fear of not being popular fear of not being liked. 217 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:33,000 There are so many irrational fears that don't help us or strengthen us in our relationship with Jesus Christ. 218 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:54,000 And and as a result, those fears a man made or Satan induced based largely on our pride keep us not only from repenting, but they keep us from feeling the spirit of the Lord, which is really important. 219 00:24:54,000 --> 00:25:05,000 That it's really important that we feel the spirit of the Lord. That's how we know that these concepts that we're talking about and I hate using the word concepts because there's so much more than that. 220 00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:11,000 I just in my own finite ability to communicate that's that's the best way I can say it. 221 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:19,000 But David, if it's OK with you, I want to just take a couple of seconds and share some experience around this experience that Peter had. 222 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:32,000 I think that many of us in our lives have been Peter. I have, you know, in that walk on the water, for example, if if I'm in a boat that's being tossed about, you know, that can metaphorically be my life. 223 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:48,000 That can be Scott Durfee's life in a time where there's just so much going on that may it's not good that maybe my only solace, my only rescue is through Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. 224 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:57,000 So as I bid to him, let me come unto you as I ask him, let me come unto you and he says, go ahead, but you're going to have to walk on that water. 225 00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:05,000 And that water is still going to be wavy and it's still going to be difficult and it still is less dense than your body. 226 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:12,000 And so even a slight slip of faith, you will penetrate the surface of that water. 227 00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:19,000 I think Peter could swim. He was a fisherman. There's absolutely zero reservation in my mind about Peter's ability to swim. 228 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:23,000 He had to be able to swim. He spent his life on the sea more or less, right? 229 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:30,000 But he also knew I've been on the Sea of Galilee and I've been on the Sea of Galilee when there was a storm. 230 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:38,000 And he also knew that that sea could be extremely boisterous and even deadly. He knew that. 231 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:43,000 He even drives with further emphasis my point, right? He knew that. 232 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:50,000 So he knew that even in that his only savior, and I mean that in every aspect of the word in this context, 233 00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:58,000 that his savior was the only person to whom crying out would provide refuge from that storm. 234 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:04,000 And he did. He says he cried out. He cried out saying, Lord, save me. 235 00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:10,000 We heard Scott Harmon on a floor of solitary confinement in the Utah State prison. 236 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:14,000 Cry out, Lord, will you save me? 237 00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:21,000 We heard Nate Moller in his car driving away from an experience that would have ended his life at his own hand 238 00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:28,000 if his initial plan had gone through say, Lord, save me. They cried out. 239 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:36,000 So when we look at our fears and we have them, I mean, part of my fears throughout my life around repentance 240 00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:40,000 and boy, I was good at procrastinating repentance. 241 00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:45,000 And when I say good, I don't mean good in a good way. I mean that I was skilled. 242 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:51,000 I should maybe use that word instead. I was skilled at procrastinating my repentance. 243 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:54,000 Why? Well, I can share some experiences. 244 00:27:54,000 --> 00:28:00,000 For example, if I'm the kind of guy that, and I was and still am, 245 00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:03,000 unless I'm constantly repenting and turning to the Lord, 246 00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:07,000 but if I'm the kind of guy whose pride will get in my way of, 247 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:10,000 I'm really worried about what other people think of me. 248 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:18,000 If I have been conditioned through whatever means to put the great opinion of other people ahead of my own 249 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,000 or ahead of other, and here's the problem with that. 250 00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:27,000 I really don't know what that opinion is. I only know what my perception of that opinion is based on my experiences. 251 00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:36,000 And so often I need those experiences to, to support a narrative that I have in my own life created be that good or bad, usually bad. 252 00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,000 And based on your ego and pride. 253 00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:39,000 1000%. 254 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:43,000 There again, fear connected to pride. 255 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:47,000 Yeah. So if I make a decision, OK, I'm going to start participating again. 256 00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:51,000 I'm just going to ease my way back in and I start going back to church. 257 00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:56,000 And I, because of my personality, I start making friends real quickly again. 258 00:28:56,000 --> 00:29:00,000 And because of my abilities that Heavenly Father's blessed me with, 259 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:05,000 I get called to teach Sunday school and then I get called to teach gospel doctrine. 260 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:12,000 And now the pride has got in the way that I can't really go talk to these guys because what if they find out? 261 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:15,000 What if the whole ward finds out? What if the whole state? 262 00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:18,000 Oh my gosh, what if my family were to find out? 263 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:21,000 You know what? Heavenly Father loves me. 264 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:23,000 I'll just die with this. 265 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:28,000 And when I get over there, me and him will work it out because he loves me. 266 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:31,000 And that, you know, that could work. 267 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,000 But there's a problem there. 268 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:38,000 The problem there is this life is the time to prepare to meet God. 269 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:42,000 The problem there is, is men are that they might have joy. 270 00:29:42,000 --> 00:29:47,000 And as long as I'm in that attitude of procrastination, out of pride and fear, 271 00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:52,000 and it's really difficult for me to differentiate between the two when it comes to those types of things. 272 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:56,000 And this has been my experience in my life in the past, you know, 20 plus years ago. 273 00:29:56,000 --> 00:30:07,000 But it was nonetheless my experience and I still have to keep it in the forefront of my mind because those ugly things can resurface if I don't participate daily in this repentance process 274 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,000 and in this process of coming closer to my Heavenly Father. 275 00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:19,000 Well, Scott, and another fear you probably had and many of one of the fears that my students always brought up was the fear, 276 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:22,000 what if I can't change the fear? 277 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:32,000 What if I fail to to repent and make meaningful change the fear of what if I do it over and over and over again? 278 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:45,000 That fear drove many of my students to say I can only repent when I am worthy because I'm afraid that I will slip and that I'm not ready 279 00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:49,000 and that I'll just keep doing it over and over again. 280 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:52,000 That fear kept many of them from repenting. 281 00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,000 And it kept me from repenting too. 282 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:59,000 I mean, and you just described the life of every drug addict or alcoholic that's ever walked the face of this earth. 283 00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:05,000 I, for example, and for those of I haven't said it for a few weeks and so just a reminder, I'm a recovering alcoholic. 284 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:08,000 I will have 24 if I say it that way. 285 00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:14,000 I'm fronting myself and we don't do that in alcohol in my addiction recovery program. 286 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:20,000 So I have to say I have 23 years and nine or in 10 months of sobriety right now on October 26. 287 00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:26,000 I will I will have the opportunity to celebrate 24 years of continuous sobriety. 288 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:29,000 But prior to that, David, I had no problem quitting. 289 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:30,000 I could quit. 290 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:34,000 I could quit five or six times a day sometimes, right? 291 00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,000 But I couldn't stay stopped. 292 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:44,000 And the reason I couldn't stay stopped is because I wasn't participating and moving in the direction of these things that we're talking about to become. 293 00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:49,000 And now listen, people get sober all the time that are not members of our church. 294 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:58,000 But nobody who's a real alcoholic or a real drug addict gets sober without a power that's greater than themselves in their lives. 295 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:02,000 That's number two in the steps of the 12 steps in any addiction recovery program. 296 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:07,000 Well, that power is the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, even if they don't recognize that's who it is. 297 00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:08,000 That's who it is. 298 00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:13,000 And and so through that and through him, we learn. 299 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:25,000 I learned eventually and learned to make this a daily practice to put that fear and pride behind my relationship with him, thereby swallowing it up and it dissipates and goes away. 300 00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,000 Yeah. 301 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:35,000 Well, I think there's too many individuals, all of us who sometimes are afraid of God. 302 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:38,000 Yeah, I mean, we're afraid to approach him. 303 00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,000 We're afraid to have a relationship with him. 304 00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:48,000 We, you know, the fear of the Lord is a positive thing if you translate the word fear into revere, reverence, worship. 305 00:32:48,000 --> 00:33:05,000 But the real irrational fear of God is a result of not knowing God, not understanding who he is, not understanding his love, not understanding his mercy, not understanding his grace, not not not knowing that he knows us perfectly and still loves us. 306 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:20,000 So anyway, though there are so many fears that that again, not only keep us from repenting, but block us from feeling the spirit of the Lord and the love of God in our life. 307 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:30,000 There was a scripture that I that I found in my search when I was called to be a patriarch and I was going through this process trying to learn more about this using the scriptures. 308 00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:36,000 I loved two scriptures that two verses that are in Dr. and Covenants section 67. 309 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:52,000 This is a revelation given through the prophet Joseph Smith and it's kind of a missionary zone conference where all of the missionaries have been kind of called back and they're having a conference and and they're seeking to know the will of the Lord. 310 00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:53,000 They're they're seeking revelation. 311 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:57,000 They're seeking to know what what they should be doing. 312 00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:07,000 And in verse three, it reads, he endeavored to believe that he should receive the blessing which was offered unto you. 313 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:14,000 And I believe that blessing includes, among other things, revelation, that they were seeking revelation. 314 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:18,000 They were seeking to know the will of the Lord for them. 315 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:26,000 But behold, the verse continues, verily, I say unto you, there were fears in your eyes. 316 00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:29,000 There were fears in your hearts. 317 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:37,000 And verily, this is the reason that you did not receive revelation. 318 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:55,000 I I that scripture, I know is true that as long as I had fear in my heart, it was impossible for me to really receive the spirit of the Lord and the revelation that I needed. 319 00:34:55,000 --> 00:35:02,000 In order to pronounce, receive a revelation for someone else, let alone for myself. 320 00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:13,000 And in order to give patriarchal blessings, I knew that I had to overcome this fear in order to receive the spirit of the Lord and receive revelation. 321 00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:18,000 We have to we have to learn how to replace fear. 322 00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:27,000 And and I in my search, Scott found it's in two places. It's in 1 John and it's in Moroni chapter eight. 323 00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:37,000 And there's a verse that says, perfect love casteth out all fear. 324 00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,000 I read it first in Mormon chapter eight, verse 16. 325 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:46,000 And and that just really affected me because I knew that that was the antidote. 326 00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:53,000 I knew that that was the answer that I had to learn how to replace fear. 327 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:56,000 I don't think any of us can stop fear. 328 00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:02,000 Just like it's impossible, I think, to have perfect control over our thoughts. 329 00:36:02,000 --> 00:36:15,000 I don't think we do because I think living in a world of sin that we we see sin and we have sinful thoughts and Satan, we believe can has the power to put negative temptations and thoughts into the world. 330 00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:20,000 And I believe the same is true for putting emotions into our hearts. 331 00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:39,000 I just don't believe you can live in this world, this fallen mortal world and listen to any news or anything else without feeling negative emotions that can really, really hurt us and affect us in negative ways spiritually. 332 00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:42,000 You know, you talk about that perfect love casteth out all fear. 333 00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:43,000 What is that perfect love? 334 00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:51,000 Well, that perfect love is our heavenly Father through his son Jesus Christ and communicated to us through the Holy Ghost. 335 00:36:51,000 --> 00:37:01,000 And so so important when we talk about fear, this is something that is really prominent, I think, in all people. 336 00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:11,000 We see this a great deal, especially in in this is my experience, so especially to me in the rooms of recovery fear. 337 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:17,000 In fact, there's a part of the big book of Alcoholics and Honours where it says we think fair ought to be clashed with stealing. 338 00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:20,000 It seems to be it seems to cause more trouble. 339 00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:33,000 And then you go even in that book, you know, in in in kind of in line with what we're talking about here, it talks about that the anecdote to fear is a relationship with our heavenly Father. 340 00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:35,000 That's what it is. 341 00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:37,000 It suggests that relationship. 342 00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:43,000 And when we feel that fear, you mentioned earlier that, you know, we fear God. 343 00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:45,000 A lot of times we fear God. 344 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:46,000 And there's a reason for that. 345 00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:50,000 We have been we're in a mortal experience. 346 00:37:50,000 --> 00:37:51,000 We have a veil. 347 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,000 We don't remember exactly. 348 00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:56,000 We have rememberings through the spirit. 349 00:37:56,000 --> 00:38:07,000 And much of that is 100% dependent on our our desire and our actions to kind of precipitate that in our lives. 350 00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:17,000 But when we think about fearing our heavenly Father, when we're raised up and we're taught that he's our Father in heaven, a lot of people in this. 351 00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:23,000 So what we do just naturally is we take a father figure or a man figure. 352 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:28,000 And we exponentially expand that to meet our heavenly Father. 353 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:40,000 And so if we in our experience with other human beings know that that experience would cause anger in that relationship, then we think that in that relationship with our heavenly Father. 354 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:45,000 Well, if it's anger here, my gosh, it must be anger times a million there. 355 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:53,000 And that for me, you know, I'm sharing my experience here, but in listening to others share their experiences over the years. 356 00:38:53,000 --> 00:39:06,000 It's pretty much in line with theirs too, that we often see that as a punishing a God that would lay down lashes or whatever the case may be. 357 00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:11,000 Well, we we we too often Scott transfer. 358 00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:22,000 Our relationship with a mortal fallen imperfect father, right, earthly father, yeah, with our heavenly Father. 359 00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:38,000 And I think we too often just try to put human human characteristics on God that are totally inappropriate and inaccurate. 360 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:48,000 So I know that I've done that you've done that everybody's done that I have a dear friend who's a who's a Japanese who's a Japanese convert to the church. 361 00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:50,000 You know, and such a good friend. 362 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:53,000 I love Ted Sorrell very much. 363 00:39:53,000 --> 00:40:07,000 But he used to call me and still does occasionally and we talk, but he used to call me and he would say, tell me, tell me again, David, about about heavenly Father's love. 364 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:11,000 And this is this a good man who's been a bishop who's right now on a full time mission. 365 00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:14,000 He and his sweetheart, great man. 366 00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:23,000 But so he grew up with a father who was a samurai and was very harsh, very strict. 367 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:33,000 And and it's it was just really hard for him to picture a loving, kind, merciful, heavenly father. 368 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:38,000 I don't know if individuals remember and I can't remember which episode it is. 369 00:40:38,000 --> 00:41:01,000 The patriarchal blessing that I gave in the first few years I was a patriarch to a young woman who was 32 years old, had been to church in 16 years and, you know, had had all kinds of challenges and and in life had just made, you know, what she thought were were almost probably unrepentable mistakes. 370 00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:13,000 And feeling impressed that I needed to tell her from her heavenly father that number one, he wasn't mad at her. 371 00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:18,000 And number two, that she was one of his favorites. 372 00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:24,000 I, Scott, was so filled with the love of God for that young woman. 373 00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:30,000 And for everyone else I gave a patriarchal blessing to I could I could just feel. 374 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:36,000 Yeah, it just came through me this love of God that he has for his children. 375 00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:46,000 So there are so many irrational fears and mortal fears and misconceptions and false ideas and traditions. 376 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:50,000 But I think it's important we call those out so that we don't get stuck and stay in those. 377 00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:53,000 You know, I remember the first time that that was brought to my awareness. 378 00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:56,000 What an epiphany that was, right? 379 00:41:56,000 --> 00:42:00,000 And so, you know, I know what it's like to be my dad's favorite. 380 00:42:00,000 --> 00:42:03,000 And I know all seven of my siblings feel the same way. 381 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:08,000 I just I look at the way that I've been a dad to my kids sometimes, though. 382 00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:19,000 And I think, my goodness, I did not model a father, especially a celestialized father, which I'm not and I'm not pretending to be. 383 00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:22,000 But maybe I'm working towards that, hopefully, right? 384 00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:36,000 But I think of what kind of stumbling blocks have I thrown in front of my kids when it comes to their relationship with their heavenly father because of the harshness with which I handled situations in the past. 385 00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:39,000 Some of the greatest regrets of our life, for sure. 386 00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:49,000 Well, I want to go back to this idea of perfect love casting out all fear, you know, and in Muroni 8, it's actually Mormon who says it. 387 00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:57,000 Mormon's writing a letter. He's written a letter to Muroni and Muroni has included this letter on to the plates. 388 00:42:57,000 --> 00:43:04,000 And and Mormon says this is Marona Maroni 8 verse 16. 389 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:10,000 And part of the verse says this is so Mormon writing to his son. 390 00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:22,000 Behold, I speak with boldness, having authority from God, and I fear not what man can do. 391 00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:28,000 Here here's his whole civilization is being destroyed. He's being wiped out Mormon. 392 00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:33,000 This is Mormon and he's witnessing all these wars and death. 393 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:44,000 And he says, I fear not what man can do. And then this this line for perfect love casteth out all fear. 394 00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:52,000 Well, when I read that in my search after being called to be a patriarch, I knew that was the how. 395 00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:58,000 How can I replace my fears? How can I overcome my fears? 396 00:43:58,000 --> 00:44:04,000 Because I read that, Scott, I thought, OK, so that's the answer. That's the how. 397 00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:09,000 But how do I get that love? How do I get that love? 398 00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:15,000 That's the real question. And the thought immediately came into my mind. 399 00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:20,000 Muroni 748, I knew that scripture. I thought, you know that scripture. 400 00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:35,000 So I it's only one page back in Muroni 748, which is again this amazing discourse on faith, hope and charity. 401 00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:45,000 And in verse 48 of Muroni 7, we read, Wherefore my beloved brother, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, 402 00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:53,000 that ye may be filled with this love. And this love is charity, the pure love of Christ or perfect love. 403 00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:58,000 So what's perfect love? If perfect love casts out all fear, what is that? 404 00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:05,000 It is the love of Christ. It is the love of God. It is charity. 405 00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:15,000 And I believe and I had come to this conclusion years before this, this experience I had that charity is different than me loving someone. 406 00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:19,000 The charity is the pure love of God, pure love of Christ. 407 00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:29,000 So if I can obtain through the gift of the Spirit, the Holy Ghost, the gift of charity, because it is a spiritual gift, 408 00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:38,000 it allows me to get a glimpse of how God sees me and how he sees someone else. 409 00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:47,000 It's not my feelings towards them. It's feeling God's love. It's seeing how God sees them. 410 00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:56,000 That's the gift of charity. And so Scott, how if perfect love casts out all fear, how do we get that love? 411 00:45:56,000 --> 00:46:05,000 We pray with all energy of heart that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed as a gift. 412 00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:11,000 It has to be bestowed upon all who are true followers of his son Jesus Christ. 413 00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:19,000 Okay, so after I read that, I decided I would make, I would do an experiment. 414 00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:29,000 And I began to experiment with how can I pray with all energy of heart to be filled with the love of Christ, perfect love, 415 00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:43,000 that my fears would be cast out. The first thing I learned was how unaware I had been all of my life, of all of my fears. 416 00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:51,000 That was shocking to me. I became super aware, sensitized by the fears in my life. 417 00:46:51,000 --> 00:47:03,000 And it was, it broke my heart that I had allowed too many fears about too many things to manipulate and control my life. 418 00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:09,000 Sometimes it can almost begin to run our lives, that fear. I mean, we talk so often about, you know, 419 00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:15,000 a time when we feel shame-based and fear-driven in all things that we do, you know, 420 00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:24,000 and it can just really consume and take over. And at some point, it can even trick us into believing that that's not fear, it's just our life. 421 00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:27,000 It's just being mortal. It's just being human. 422 00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:28,000 Exactly. 423 00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:33,000 And it is. I know it is, because I feel it every day. I still feel it every day. 424 00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:44,000 You can't stop fear from being part of our everyday life, but if we're commanded in the scriptures to fear not, 425 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:52,000 or to be not afraid, he's telling us we don't have to accept it. We don't have to be complacent about it. 426 00:47:52,000 --> 00:48:00,000 That we've been told how to replace it with perfect love. Perfect love cast out all fear. 427 00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:06,000 And we've been told that if we'll pray with all energy of heart, that he will bestow that love upon us. 428 00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:15,000 So as I began to experiment with this, becoming super aware of my fears, I had an experience, a simple little experience, really, 429 00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:20,000 going to work one day, going down the freeway, 70, 75 miles an hour. 430 00:48:20,000 --> 00:48:26,000 Somebody cut me off, and I just couldn't believe. I couldn't believe that I didn't hit them. 431 00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:36,000 I don't know how an accident was prevented there, but we must have been within inches of a serious accident. 432 00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:42,000 And I immediately was afraid, which caused an anger to come out of me. 433 00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:52,000 So here's another connection. I know pride is connected to my fears, and I know that fear is connected to my anger. 434 00:48:52,000 --> 00:49:04,000 I think most of my expressions of anger, especially as a parent, and throughout my life, when I've been angry, 435 00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:10,000 every time I've thought back to that now, and every time I become angry now in the present, I think about it, 436 00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:13,000 and it's usually associated with some fear. 437 00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:26,000 It has been for me too. Many years ago, when I was beginning to work the 12 Steps of Recovery through an alcoholic recovery program that's anonymous, 438 00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:35,000 I had a sponsor, and I was a few years into recovery. I was actually maybe 10 years, maybe eight years sober, 439 00:49:35,000 --> 00:49:45,000 and I'd been working the steps, and I was sponsoring other guys, and I was actively involved in my church, and I was actively involved in my recovery program. 440 00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:59,000 But I had this anger issue. I'm not proud to admit it that even in my sobriety, a few times in the early years, I would actually be in a fistfight for stupid reasons. 441 00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:05,000 I was thinking back, which seemed like extremely important reasons at the time. Why? Because of the emotions around it. 442 00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:13,000 Well, I'm talking to my sponsor who has passed on now, not a member of our church, but one of the most spiritual men that I've ever met 443 00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:20,000 and had a deep relationship with his Heavenly Father, and had a lot of things that I just really wanted in my life, 444 00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:30,000 and that's why I chose him to be a mentor. As a matter of fact, he was instrumental, maybe one of outside of a couple of my ecclesiastical leaders, 445 00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:39,000 my bishop at the time and my stake president at the time, but he was extremely instrumental in my being brought back to the fold through baptism 446 00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:45,000 after I had had my membership lifted for a few years. Not only was he supportive of it, but he was like, 447 00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:51,000 Scott, in order for you to maintain your integrity, you absolutely have to do this. It was that important to him. 448 00:50:51,000 --> 00:51:00,000 And so this guy had so much worth, his value, his opinion meant so much to me. His name was Al. We called him Big Al. 449 00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:07,000 He wrote a Harley. I wrote a Harley. He was a great salesman. I've been a pretty good salesman throughout my life. 450 00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:11,000 He just had a lot of things that were just things that I wanted to pattern my life after. 451 00:51:11,000 --> 00:51:16,000 I was talking to him one day. We used to meet at a coffee shop because that's where he liked to meet. 452 00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:23,000 We met at this coffee shop and he said, and he says, Scott, what's going on? Because I called him. I said, Al, I need to talk to you. 453 00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:29,000 I really need to talk to you. I've got a thing in my life that's hanging me up and it's preventing me from moving on. 454 00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:36,000 And he said, what is it? And I said, it's anger. I says, I get angry so fast for whatever reason. 455 00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:44,000 At the time I hadn't analyzed why I had tried. I tried to figure out why I was angry and I always came down to everybody's against me. 456 00:51:44,000 --> 00:51:51,000 That's why I'm so angry. Right? And I had a chip on my shoulder, which sometimes still surfaces, unfortunately. 457 00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:58,000 And the insecurities. 100%. And pride. Mostly insecurities, which were based on my pride. 458 00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:04,000 The insecurities were because. And they lead to fear. And then the fear manifests itself through anger. 459 00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:16,000 And that's what he told me. So we're sitting there and we're talking about a few things and he's just gently listening and quietly listening and making a few comments here and there. 460 00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:22,000 And then finally, when we were done, I said, so what do you think? And he says, you're not angry. He says, you're not really angry. 461 00:52:22,000 --> 00:52:31,000 He says, unfortunately, though, you're very fearful. And he says, your life is being run by your fear. 462 00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:37,000 Now, this was a guy that had 40 or so years in sobriety at the time. He had worked a solid program. 463 00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:44,000 He had seen and been in places that would curdle your blood in the name of helping others. 464 00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:52,000 And he was helping me that day. He helped me realize that that's exactly what it was. And David, that, for me, was liberating. 465 00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:54,000 My life changed that day. 466 00:52:54,000 --> 00:53:08,000 Well, I wish somebody would have taught me that lesson before I was ordained a patriarch in my fifties, because this is, I think, the most important lesson of my life. 467 00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:11,000 And I believe it can be for our listeners. 468 00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:12,000 I agree. 469 00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:28,000 If they understand the connection between insecurities and pride and fear and anger and how these emotions can keep us from feeling the spirit of the Lord and keep us from repenting and keep us from forgiving. 470 00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:37,000 Right? It's, it keeps us from, from even being able to forgive ourselves and forgive others. 471 00:53:37,000 --> 00:53:52,000 So it's such an important thing. And how can we get this perfect love to cast out all fear by praying with all energy of heart and allowing the spirit of the Lord to bestow that gift on us? 472 00:53:52,000 --> 00:54:05,000 And as I'm on the freeway, back to the near accident, when I'm on the freeway and this kid cuts me off, I'm so angry. I'm so mad. 473 00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:13,000 And just immediately, which was based on my fear that I got right behind him and I began to follow him. 474 00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:22,000 I mean, if he would have touched his brakes, I was toast, but I just got right on his rear end, on his back bumper, and I was following him. 475 00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:26,000 And he went to get off the exit and I got off right behind him. 476 00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:28,000 And I was going to give him peace of my mind. 477 00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:34,000 And just as we were getting off the exit, I caught myself and I thought, what are you doing? 478 00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:37,000 Well, how come you're angry? What are you afraid of? 479 00:54:37,000 --> 00:54:48,000 You know, and I began to kind of walk this back and immediately I prayed with all energy of heart. 480 00:54:48,000 --> 00:54:53,000 This doesn't need to take long. And I find myself doing this multiple times a day, Scott. 481 00:54:53,000 --> 00:55:04,000 I prayed with all energy of heart to be filled with the love of Christ, to see him as God sees him. 482 00:55:04,000 --> 00:55:14,000 And this was just one time when I just had this sweet little miracle and I had, as I was praying with all energy of heart for love for this young man, 483 00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:20,000 I had a little vision and I could see his mother and I could see that his mother was in trouble. 484 00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:27,000 And I understood that this young man was trying to get home to help his mother. 485 00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:36,000 My heart completely changed and was filled with compassion and love and all the fear and anger was gone. 486 00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:43,000 And I actually pulled up to the side of him and I looked over at him hoping he would look at me and I was going to roll down my window 487 00:55:43,000 --> 00:55:47,000 and ask him to roll down his and I wanted to say, how can I help? 488 00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:51,000 Are you okay? How can I help you? 489 00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:58,000 I'm sure he intentionally didn't look over at me and I didn't want to honk and scare him. 490 00:55:58,000 --> 00:56:05,000 And so nothing happened. But just that simple little experience 491 00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:10,000 taught me an important lesson early on in my experiment. 492 00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:20,000 And I've been experimenting with it since then. And I never cease to get over what a miracle it is, Scott. 493 00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:29,000 What an amazing gift it is that if we will pray with all energy of heart, that's not a casual prayer. 494 00:56:29,000 --> 00:56:31,000 It doesn't have to be a long prayer. 495 00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:39,000 But when we pray with all energy of heart, which is the center of our emotions, our heart, 496 00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:45,000 to be filled with the love of Christ, His love, perfect love, 497 00:56:45,000 --> 00:56:56,000 God will bless us with that gift from the Spirit. And when we receive His love, we cannot be filled with fear. 498 00:56:56,000 --> 00:57:01,000 And when we receive His love and when fear and with it pride dissipates, 499 00:57:01,000 --> 00:57:06,000 then we are naturally set up to begin the repentance process. 500 00:57:06,000 --> 00:57:10,000 And it is a natural process at that point. It doesn't feel forced. 501 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:17,000 It doesn't feel promoted. It feels invited. It feels embraced. And it feels accepted. 502 00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:27,000 And I don't know a better gift than that to feel embraced and accepted by my Heavenly Father even in my imperfections. 503 00:57:27,000 --> 00:57:37,000 And I can feel that. The tool and the vehicle that I can get to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is repentance. 504 00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:44,000 And if I can eliminate that fear and again with it pride and some of the other emotions, 505 00:57:44,000 --> 00:57:50,000 but most of my other emotions are based on those two basic emotions, fear and pride. 506 00:57:50,000 --> 00:58:00,000 So that's the whole point, right? Is I know that that Satan can manipulate us through our emotions. 507 00:58:00,000 --> 00:58:11,000 And if he can fill our hearts with pride and fear and anger based upon all of our mortal insecurities, 508 00:58:11,000 --> 00:58:18,000 if he can get us to fill those emotions and we could include the emotion of lust. 509 00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:27,000 That if he can get us to fill lust and any of those negative inappropriate emotions, 510 00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:40,000 then he can manipulate us and ultimately keep us from repenting and to have a sweet relationship with our Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ. 511 00:58:40,000 --> 00:58:42,000 And that's what it all comes down to. 512 00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:54,000 So our emotions, which are part of our everyday life, can really keep us, block us from having that relationship with Christ 513 00:58:54,000 --> 00:59:03,000 and repenting of our sins and enjoying the full blessings of the Spirit of the Lord and the redemption of Christ in our life. 514 00:59:03,000 --> 00:59:13,000 And I hope, if listeners wouldn't mind me giving an invitation, that they would consider the fears in their own lives, 515 00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:21,000 that they would seek to become more aware of their pride and their fears and insecurities and even their anger 516 00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:28,000 and kind of think about that process of how anger is the result of our fears 517 00:59:28,000 --> 00:59:35,000 and invite you to become just more sensitive and aware of your emotions. 518 00:59:35,000 --> 00:59:37,000 That's the first invitation. 519 00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:42,000 And the second invitation is, and then to do something about it. 520 00:59:42,000 --> 00:59:51,000 Not just to accept it, but to pray with all energy of heart to be filled with the love of Christ, 521 00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:59,000 to receive the gift of charity from the Spirit of the Lord, and I promise you that if you will experiment with that, 522 00:59:59,000 --> 01:00:06,000 if you'll become more aware and if you'll experiment with praying with all energy of heart to be filled with his love, 523 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:15,000 I promise you that you can be able to overcome, not permanently, not forever. 524 01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:17,000 I feel fear every day. 525 01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:19,000 This is a daily process. 526 01:00:19,000 --> 01:00:29,000 This part of what I think President Nelson was saying to us when he tells us to repent daily is that we all feel these things every day. 527 01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:40,000 And I just invite you to experiment with these things and become more aware and more proactive in overcoming the fear and the pride 528 01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:44,000 that keeps us from repenting and enjoying that relationship. 529 01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:49,000 And a lot of times we can look at that and take that, I'm going to call it a personal inventory. 530 01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:56,000 We can take that personal inventory by identifying the parts of our lives where we feel are disconnected from the Spirit. 531 01:00:56,000 --> 01:01:00,000 And then we can take a top-down approach at that point too. 532 01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:09,000 For example, my experience with my anger, I didn't identify it as fear, but once I took that, I'm going to see where the fears are. 533 01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:16,000 And once I had that pointed out to me, then I can distill that down to that basic emotion. 534 01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:21,000 That's where the invitation that I feel comes from my Heavenly Father to come unto me. 535 01:01:21,000 --> 01:01:25,000 And I feel like I'm really coming unto him when those things happen. 536 01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:31,000 It will not only help us individual in our relationship with Jesus Christ, Scott. 537 01:01:31,000 --> 01:01:40,000 This discussion and understanding of these things will help us in our relationship with others, especially those who we love. 538 01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:52,000 And when we have maybe a spouse, significant other, or sons or daughters who become angry, we should pause for just a moment and just ask ourselves, 539 01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:56,000 what are they afraid of? What are their fears right now? 540 01:01:56,000 --> 01:02:00,000 What are their fears? Where is this coming from? 541 01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:12,000 And as you begin to learn this concept and the power, the negative power that fear and pride can have in our lives 542 01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:23,000 and how it manifests itself through anger or through procrastination or from whatever other negative actions that come out of those emotions are, 543 01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:33,000 as you are more aware of them, it can actually increase your patience and increase your ability to forgive 544 01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:40,000 and to love others who are struggling with some of the same fears and pride that we all struggle with. 545 01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:46,000 And when I'm able to do that, that's when I feel deeper joy in my heart, because I have him with me. 546 01:02:46,000 --> 01:02:49,000 Yeah, amen. That's what it comes down to. 547 01:02:49,000 --> 01:03:03,000 Wow. Here we are at the end of yet another podcast. Please take advantage and heed Dave's invitation to find those opportunities to identify how 548 01:03:03,000 --> 01:03:09,000 the various things that are keeping us from our Heavenly Father, how they distill down to fear and pride. 549 01:03:09,000 --> 01:03:20,000 And I believe because it's been my experience and I've witnessed this experience in the lives of countless others, that as we do so, we'll be drawn more nigh unto him. 550 01:03:20,000 --> 01:03:28,000 And as we do that, we'll feel his love and as we do that, we'll feel his joy and happiness and have charity, which is his love for others towards all men. 551 01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:34,000 Thank you for being with us once again. We appreciate this very much. May God bless you. 552 01:03:34,000 --> 01:03:40,000 May he be with you always and may you always remember that you have been redeemed through his blood. 553 01:03:40,000 --> 01:04:05,000 Thanks for being with us.