WEBVTT 00:00:15.980 --> 00:00:19.120 Hey everybody, welcome out another episode of 00:00:19.120 --> 00:00:22.320 Redeemed Through His Blood. I'm Scott Durfey 00:00:22.320 --> 00:00:27.160 and... I am Deb Durfey. Hi Deb. Nice job on the 00:00:27.160 --> 00:00:29.079 queue there. I kind of caught you off guard, 00:00:29.219 --> 00:00:32.640 but I was trying to talk Deb into doing the intro 00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:35.060 part, but she wouldn't do it. Maybe we'll get 00:00:35.060 --> 00:00:36.979 her to next time. I don't have that power voice, 00:00:37.460 --> 00:00:41.899 so welcome everybody. I would say hi friends. 00:00:42.100 --> 00:00:45.079 Yeah, well that's probably more inviting anyway. 00:00:45.520 --> 00:00:48.119 How are you babe? I'm good. A lot's happened 00:00:48.119 --> 00:00:51.710 since we recorded last time. Yeah. Happy anniversary. 00:00:51.950 --> 00:00:54.369 Thank you. Yeah, and thanks to all of those who 00:00:54.369 --> 00:00:57.390 commented on the anniversary on our anniversary 00:00:57.390 --> 00:01:01.429 on social media. We appreciate that. 23 years 00:01:01.429 --> 00:01:07.569 of bliss. Pure bliss. Pure bliss. We giggle on 00:01:07.569 --> 00:01:10.230 purpose. Yeah, at least we're not saying halfway 00:01:10.230 --> 00:01:12.870 done anymore, so that's good. We as in you said 00:01:12.870 --> 00:01:19.109 that. I never said that. Oh, yeah. Well, Our 00:01:19.109 --> 00:01:21.390 anniversary is really kind of special, obviously, 00:01:21.730 --> 00:01:28.209 to us and to some of our kids. But it's a time 00:01:28.209 --> 00:01:32.209 for both of us, I think, when we remember big 00:01:32.209 --> 00:01:36.069 changes happening in our lives. For me, the most 00:01:36.069 --> 00:01:38.269 important, I think, probably for you two, Deb. 00:01:39.609 --> 00:01:42.590 And we can talk about that in a minute. But we 00:01:42.590 --> 00:01:45.750 kind of started off our marriage in a little 00:01:45.750 --> 00:01:49.620 bit of an abnormal. way in more ways than one. 00:01:49.920 --> 00:01:52.659 Would you say that? Yeah. My favorite question 00:01:52.659 --> 00:01:54.379 is when people say, where did you guys meet? 00:01:54.519 --> 00:01:56.239 Yeah. And we always look at each other and kind 00:01:56.239 --> 00:01:58.680 of grin because we did meet in the LDS substance 00:01:58.680 --> 00:02:01.819 abuse mission in a recovery meeting. Yeah. And 00:02:01.819 --> 00:02:04.120 that's how you say it. When people ask me, how 00:02:04.120 --> 00:02:08.580 did you guys meet? I just say rehab. Because 00:02:08.580 --> 00:02:12.240 I like to shock people, I guess. Yeah. You and 00:02:12.240 --> 00:02:15.139 Jessica. Yeah, that's probably true. That's probably 00:02:15.139 --> 00:02:18.280 true. What I was actually referring to wasn't 00:02:18.280 --> 00:02:21.960 just that. I mean, that was definitely out of 00:02:21.960 --> 00:02:24.180 the norm for sure. And we were newlyweds with 00:02:24.180 --> 00:02:28.819 seven children. Seven kids, our wedding party, 00:02:29.080 --> 00:02:32.159 I guess. My best men were Trevor and Dakota and 00:02:32.159 --> 00:02:35.560 the kids, Ann Bowen and the boys that I coached 00:02:35.560 --> 00:02:39.219 baseball at the time. That was kind of cool. 00:02:39.960 --> 00:02:43.000 Still not what I was referring to. For our honeymoon. 00:02:44.419 --> 00:02:46.979 For our honeymoon. You kind of got to put a story 00:02:46.979 --> 00:02:48.699 on this because we're going to sound really weird 00:02:48.699 --> 00:02:51.210 when you say this. But get ready to be shocked. 00:02:51.389 --> 00:02:53.330 OK, go ahead. We're pretty worried anyway. I 00:02:53.330 --> 00:02:55.530 mean, as you said, we're really nerdy right when 00:02:55.530 --> 00:02:58.689 it comes to this stuff. We spent our first day 00:02:58.689 --> 00:03:02.250 of our honeymoon at Education Week at BYU. And 00:03:02.250 --> 00:03:04.810 we loved it. And we've loved it so much. We've 00:03:04.810 --> 00:03:08.550 been back every year since. To celebrate. Including 00:03:08.550 --> 00:03:10.750 this year. Friday. We went and spent the entire 00:03:10.750 --> 00:03:13.129 day. I went all day Thursday. I like to go get 00:03:13.129 --> 00:03:17.469 in the deep nerdy stuff by myself for a day. 00:03:18.300 --> 00:03:21.000 Deb had to work and then we were able to go on 00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.060 our anniversary. It was really cool. We started 00:03:23.060 --> 00:03:25.539 the day in the temple, which was the most important 00:03:25.539 --> 00:03:28.699 part. Yeah, that was pretty sweet. We had we 00:03:28.699 --> 00:03:30.580 had some really cool temple experiences though 00:03:30.580 --> 00:03:33.319 on our honeymoon, too. So right after Education 00:03:33.319 --> 00:03:36.620 Week, it was the following month. Oh, it was 00:03:36.620 --> 00:03:40.400 in September. Oh, you wrecked my story. OK, color 00:03:40.400 --> 00:03:45.020 it any way you want. Now we know the truth. Yeah, 00:03:45.120 --> 00:03:49.460 the Scots absent -minded. We ended up going to... 00:03:49.460 --> 00:03:52.360 Well, the next month was only a week later. I 00:03:52.360 --> 00:03:56.039 know. Okay, okay. So we ended up going to Nauvoo, 00:03:56.419 --> 00:04:00.319 Illinois. Ever heard of it? Yeah. That's where 00:04:00.319 --> 00:04:04.520 you met my dad. And mom. And mom. Yeah. Yeah. 00:04:04.879 --> 00:04:07.219 Yeah, first time. They were on a mission, so 00:04:07.219 --> 00:04:11.110 they didn't attend the wedding. No. So that's 00:04:11.110 --> 00:04:14.270 when actually when they did civil marriages in 00:04:14.270 --> 00:04:17.310 the temple American fork. Yeah temple. Yeah, 00:04:17.310 --> 00:04:21.110 and so we were married civilly until my Ceiling 00:04:21.110 --> 00:04:24.589 was cancelled to my first husband, right? And 00:04:24.589 --> 00:04:28.149 so we were married civilly and then we went out 00:04:28.149 --> 00:04:37.009 to Navu and You met met the parents And then 00:04:37.009 --> 00:04:39.949 we did sea leans at the NavuTel pole. Exactly. 00:04:40.269 --> 00:04:42.569 That's what I was getting at. That was so cool. 00:04:43.009 --> 00:04:46.990 So cool. Anyway, sorry to burden you with all 00:04:46.990 --> 00:04:49.970 of that personal stuff, but it's kind of been 00:04:49.970 --> 00:04:51.610 kind of important to us. And you know what? It's 00:04:51.610 --> 00:04:54.069 part of our story, part of our journey, part 00:04:54.069 --> 00:04:56.250 of everything that's been about. We've tried 00:04:56.250 --> 00:04:59.069 to be pretty... transparent about all of that 00:04:59.069 --> 00:05:01.910 here on the podcast. Things have kind of shifted 00:05:01.910 --> 00:05:04.750 as you've noticed since Dave left where we've 00:05:04.750 --> 00:05:07.860 been kind of more focusing on. Deb and mine's 00:05:07.860 --> 00:05:10.100 experience a little bit more than just going 00:05:10.100 --> 00:05:13.079 straight with the experience and the doctrine 00:05:13.079 --> 00:05:16.019 I guess that's because we're a little bit more. 00:05:16.139 --> 00:05:18.600 We're not David. We're more qualified in that 00:05:18.600 --> 00:05:21.339 area. Speaking of David, we got an email from 00:05:21.339 --> 00:05:22.920 him the other day. They're having a wonderful 00:05:22.920 --> 00:05:25.620 experience with the young adults, young single 00:05:25.620 --> 00:05:28.939 adults in Australia. I love that. I know. I know. 00:05:29.600 --> 00:05:31.480 So Dave and Chris, if you're listening, we love 00:05:31.480 --> 00:05:35.660 you. We miss you. Get back to work. You know 00:05:35.660 --> 00:05:37.300 what it's funny because when you say when you 00:05:37.300 --> 00:05:38.639 talk about Dave and Chris then I think about 00:05:38.639 --> 00:05:41.000 my younger brother Eric and Kerry who are serving 00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:43.740 as mission presidents in Detroit and I just want 00:05:43.740 --> 00:05:45.379 to do a shout out to them because I follow them 00:05:45.379 --> 00:05:48.259 on social media and I know that was Kerry's very 00:05:48.259 --> 00:05:53.139 sister graves her discomfort zone with social 00:05:53.139 --> 00:05:55.639 media. She's killing it. Yeah, you wouldn't know. 00:05:55.819 --> 00:05:57.800 She's doing a phenomenal job. I noticed some 00:05:57.800 --> 00:05:59.800 of the stuff that they had on Instagram the other 00:05:59.800 --> 00:06:04.879 day at a man that made me so trunkey for a mission. 00:06:05.319 --> 00:06:07.160 I love it. Yeah. Yeah, they're doing a phenomenal 00:06:07.160 --> 00:06:10.860 job. I just I can't even imagine how wonderful 00:06:10.860 --> 00:06:14.360 those guys are. I know mission leaders. Yeah, 00:06:14.660 --> 00:06:16.279 what the God look forward to going and seeing 00:06:16.279 --> 00:06:20.660 them in a maybe next summer or whatever. Okay. 00:06:21.339 --> 00:06:24.379 Here we are. Anything that we need to wrap up 00:06:24.379 --> 00:06:27.139 from last week, babe? We did say that we were 00:06:27.139 --> 00:06:29.819 going to talk about faith this week. We reminded 00:06:29.819 --> 00:06:34.620 everyone, including ourselves, to take a personal, 00:06:35.300 --> 00:06:38.019 did you take a personal inventory? And where 00:06:38.019 --> 00:06:40.459 are you with faith? I think those were the questions 00:06:40.459 --> 00:06:44.839 that we ended with was, you know, I honestly, 00:06:45.800 --> 00:06:47.839 I think if I don't write it down, I'm not taking 00:06:47.839 --> 00:06:53.399 a personal inventory. Like in my head I I do 00:06:53.399 --> 00:06:57.220 a lot of self -talk and Maybe some of it's out 00:06:57.220 --> 00:06:59.040 loud. I'm gonna have to pay attention if I talk 00:06:59.040 --> 00:07:02.180 to myself out loud when I take a personal inventory 00:07:02.180 --> 00:07:06.660 it's more about How am I doing? How am I feeling? 00:07:07.120 --> 00:07:09.899 How's my connection? How's my you know, I don't 00:07:09.899 --> 00:07:12.600 I should write it down I think I think it would 00:07:12.600 --> 00:07:14.740 be more beneficial if I wrote it down Have you 00:07:14.740 --> 00:07:17.720 ever done that? I have in the past, but I don't 00:07:17.720 --> 00:07:21.000 do it very often So I should probably do that 00:07:21.000 --> 00:07:24.740 more often. Well, officially, there's not a right 00:07:24.740 --> 00:07:27.879 or a wrong way. I know. Officially, officially. 00:07:28.500 --> 00:07:32.500 Now, effectively, or whatever, maybe there is 00:07:32.500 --> 00:07:35.000 a better way. Well, journaling too. Yeah. I mean, 00:07:35.040 --> 00:07:37.920 I'm not that good. I used to be super good at 00:07:37.920 --> 00:07:40.740 it. And then somebody, my journal got in the 00:07:40.740 --> 00:07:44.879 wrong hands and it kind of scarred me. Oh, really? 00:07:45.540 --> 00:07:50.800 Yeah. So I just, I, keep things, I don't know. 00:07:51.040 --> 00:07:53.839 Yeah, that's interesting. I've had some personal 00:07:53.839 --> 00:07:56.839 inventory come up this week. Yeah. Yeah. I don't 00:07:56.839 --> 00:07:59.699 really want to talk about it, but it has included 00:07:59.699 --> 00:08:02.500 some writing, and it actually included a reach 00:08:02.500 --> 00:08:08.439 out to my priesthood later. In Alcoholics Anonymous, 00:08:08.680 --> 00:08:10.420 we have this thing that's called the spiritual 00:08:10.420 --> 00:08:13.389 axiom. You remember that? Are you familiar with 00:08:13.389 --> 00:08:17.149 it? And this is I'm going to read it exactly. 00:08:17.610 --> 00:08:19.870 So let me just turn I hadn't planned to bring 00:08:19.870 --> 00:08:22.689 this up. So give me bear with me while I look 00:08:22.689 --> 00:08:26.069 this up quickly. But the spiritual axiom basically 00:08:26.069 --> 00:08:29.829 has a lot to do with this. exactly the thing 00:08:29.829 --> 00:08:31.870 that we're talking about inventory, personal 00:08:31.870 --> 00:08:34.730 inventory, right? Again, this is called the spiritual 00:08:34.730 --> 00:08:38.549 axiom. And this is found on page 90 of 12 steps 00:08:38.549 --> 00:08:40.750 and 12 traditions from Alcoholics Anonymous. 00:08:40.909 --> 00:08:45.070 Okay. And here it is. It is a spiritual axiom 00:08:45.070 --> 00:08:48.570 that every time we are disturbed, no matter what 00:08:48.570 --> 00:08:53.649 the cause, there's something wrong with us. How 00:08:53.649 --> 00:08:55.370 do you feel about that? Let me read it one more 00:08:55.370 --> 00:09:00.960 time. There is a spiritual axiom that every time 00:09:00.960 --> 00:09:05.440 we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there's 00:09:05.440 --> 00:09:08.039 something wrong with us. You want to know exactly 00:09:08.039 --> 00:09:11.980 where I went? Pride. Low end and high end pride. 00:09:12.179 --> 00:09:15.340 It's all about me. Yeah. I mean, that's exactly 00:09:15.340 --> 00:09:19.580 what it brought up when you read that. So I had 00:09:19.580 --> 00:09:25.110 a situation where I... became disturbed and it 00:09:25.110 --> 00:09:28.230 was in a church setting. It was on Sunday in 00:09:28.230 --> 00:09:32.750 a church setting where I became disturbed and 00:09:32.750 --> 00:09:37.590 I needed to take a look at that and I needed 00:09:37.590 --> 00:09:40.529 to take a look at what's my part. I'm still in 00:09:40.529 --> 00:09:45.320 the process of all of what's my part. But it's 00:09:45.320 --> 00:09:48.440 mostly all my part. Now that doesn't mean, as 00:09:48.440 --> 00:09:52.360 a matter of fact, the behavior that I'm referring 00:09:52.360 --> 00:09:55.720 to or what happened here, there's nothing wrong. 00:09:56.320 --> 00:10:00.940 Right. There's no offense. There's just nothing 00:10:00.940 --> 00:10:03.860 wrong. And I know I'm trying to be vague here 00:10:03.860 --> 00:10:06.720 because I don't want to divulge all of it. However, 00:10:07.580 --> 00:10:13.240 we can do something one way. And depending on 00:10:13.240 --> 00:10:16.940 our state of heart, you know where I'm going 00:10:16.940 --> 00:10:19.120 with this, right? So it's not about what we do, 00:10:19.200 --> 00:10:21.600 it's about who we are while we're doing it. It's 00:10:21.600 --> 00:10:23.720 not necessarily about what we say, it's about 00:10:23.720 --> 00:10:28.240 who am I while I'm saying it or what is my state 00:10:28.240 --> 00:10:30.860 of heart while I'm saying it or while I'm doing 00:10:30.860 --> 00:10:35.539 it. Sometimes in church, stuff gets brought up 00:10:35.539 --> 00:10:41.179 that really kind of has echoings of past type 00:10:41.179 --> 00:10:45.639 of judgments and past type of viewpoints, not 00:10:45.639 --> 00:10:48.039 from the church, but from the people in the church. 00:10:48.799 --> 00:10:53.220 And, you know, my story consists of many years 00:10:53.220 --> 00:10:57.230 of being in a dark, dark place, you know. But 00:10:57.230 --> 00:11:00.230 I came back from that dark, dark place and there's 00:11:00.230 --> 00:11:02.929 not many. There's not a lot. And I'm not patting 00:11:02.929 --> 00:11:05.490 myself on the back. I consider myself to be the 00:11:05.490 --> 00:11:07.809 most fortunate, most blessed among everybody 00:11:07.809 --> 00:11:10.309 to have this second, third, fourth and fifth 00:11:10.309 --> 00:11:13.389 chance, right? But for every person that comes 00:11:13.389 --> 00:11:17.110 back, there's 10 that don't. And there's and 00:11:17.110 --> 00:11:19.590 I don't know those are accurate. That's hyperbole 00:11:19.590 --> 00:11:23.309 potentially, but it's definitely, you know, an 00:11:23.309 --> 00:11:27.629 estimate. But there are fewer that come back 00:11:27.629 --> 00:11:31.789 than actually do come back. And I think part 00:11:31.789 --> 00:11:34.090 of the reason for that is some of the attitudes 00:11:34.090 --> 00:11:37.490 that are perpetuated and probably unintentionally. 00:11:38.129 --> 00:11:40.789 And some of these attitudes were being displayed 00:11:40.789 --> 00:11:45.210 in a meeting that I was in. And I spoke up. And 00:11:45.210 --> 00:11:47.750 I spoke up. And what I said was not offensive. 00:11:48.200 --> 00:11:50.159 But it felt weird to me, and the reason I think 00:11:50.159 --> 00:11:51.879 that it felt weird to me is because I wasn't 00:11:51.879 --> 00:11:54.600 responding in a Christ -like way. I wasn't responding 00:11:54.600 --> 00:11:57.659 to a problem that was happening in a way that 00:11:57.659 --> 00:12:00.039 could be constructive. I was responding to it 00:12:00.039 --> 00:12:05.440 out of a position of defensiveness. I was responding 00:12:05.440 --> 00:12:08.720 to resentments that I was still hanging on to 00:12:08.720 --> 00:12:12.399 that were old resentments that I haven't completely 00:12:12.399 --> 00:12:16.580 dealt with. So it was a trigger? Yeah. Perhaps. 00:12:16.820 --> 00:12:19.919 Yeah. Yeah. And so because of that, I became 00:12:19.919 --> 00:12:23.480 disturbed. It's a spiritual axiom that every 00:12:23.480 --> 00:12:25.700 time I'm disturbed, no matter what the cause, 00:12:26.000 --> 00:12:29.559 there's something wrong with me. And I had to 00:12:29.559 --> 00:12:31.860 take a good hard look at that. I'm still taking 00:12:31.860 --> 00:12:34.039 a good hard look at that. I'm in the process 00:12:34.039 --> 00:12:36.899 of taking that inventory because if that's true 00:12:36.899 --> 00:12:40.399 for me still today in one area, after 26 years 00:12:40.399 --> 00:12:43.879 of sobriety and working on my sobriety, you know, 00:12:44.000 --> 00:12:46.440 first off, I don't apologize for that because 00:12:46.440 --> 00:12:50.870 I'm human. Yeah, but second off I do need to 00:12:50.870 --> 00:12:53.169 take a look at it and just because I'm 26 years 00:12:53.169 --> 00:12:55.750 sober doesn't mean I'm done growing Yeah, and 00:12:55.750 --> 00:12:58.269 it doesn't mean I'm done working on this stuff 00:12:58.269 --> 00:13:00.929 Yeah, and it doesn't mean I'm done exercising 00:13:00.929 --> 00:13:05.110 faith unto repentance So that I can get this 00:13:05.110 --> 00:13:08.009 stuff wrapped up. It's a big awareness Yeah, 00:13:08.009 --> 00:13:10.049 and it's been pretty much for not giving details 00:13:10.049 --> 00:13:13.049 because that was pretty detailed I think I pretty 00:13:13.049 --> 00:13:15.129 much detailed it. Good job, puke truth. Yeah, 00:13:16.009 --> 00:13:20.389 it's been uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable for 00:13:20.389 --> 00:13:24.409 me. Which is good. Somebody I know always says 00:13:24.409 --> 00:13:26.710 there's no growing in the comfort zone and no 00:13:26.710 --> 00:13:29.570 comfort in the growing zone. That'd be you. I 00:13:29.570 --> 00:13:32.070 know. Yeah, anyway. That's why when I get uncomfortable, 00:13:32.269 --> 00:13:34.309 I'm like, oh boy, what do I get? What do I get 00:13:34.309 --> 00:13:38.389 to learn now? Yeah. And it's not uncommon for 00:13:38.389 --> 00:13:43.769 me to be uncomfortable. Yeah. Me too. Me too. 00:13:44.210 --> 00:13:48.490 Yeah. That's pretty awesome to have that awareness 00:13:48.490 --> 00:13:54.330 and to reflect, you know, put the mirror in front 00:13:54.330 --> 00:13:57.929 of your face and go, okay, what's my part? One 00:13:57.929 --> 00:14:01.950 of the things that I've learned in my recovery 00:14:01.950 --> 00:14:05.429 process is that I really do need to look at my 00:14:05.429 --> 00:14:09.029 part in everything in every conflict and every 00:14:10.840 --> 00:14:15.039 Now it when things are going great It's way less 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:17.879 important that I look at my part You know what 00:14:17.879 --> 00:14:19.580 I mean for sure when things are going really 00:14:19.580 --> 00:14:21.379 good for me. That's when I need to look more 00:14:21.379 --> 00:14:24.720 at his part You know, but but that's the other 00:14:24.720 --> 00:14:26.500 thing too is when things aren't going great for 00:14:26.500 --> 00:14:29.580 me that I need to also look at his part Right. 00:14:29.759 --> 00:14:32.899 Yeah, and going back to that Adam Miller quote 00:14:32.899 --> 00:14:37.919 when we get out of the way of self Keeping the 00:14:37.919 --> 00:14:41.559 law of the gospel is work of relying on Christ's 00:14:41.559 --> 00:14:44.039 merits, not the work of generating your own. 00:14:44.519 --> 00:14:46.720 Of course, that's a quote from what excerpts 00:14:46.720 --> 00:14:48.919 from Letters to a Young Mormon, right? Yeah, 00:14:48.960 --> 00:14:50.820 we quoted it last week. Last week, I think Beck 00:14:50.820 --> 00:14:53.460 actually called and wanted a copy of it from 00:14:53.460 --> 00:14:55.980 me. Hi, Beck. We love you. Hi, Beck. We love 00:14:55.980 --> 00:14:59.899 you the most. Do you mind just reading that whole 00:14:59.899 --> 00:15:02.889 thing again? Yeah, it's just it's just too good. 00:15:03.289 --> 00:15:05.570 Keeping the law doesn't earn you heavenly merits 00:15:05.570 --> 00:15:07.710 and breaking the law doesn't earn you hellish 00:15:07.710 --> 00:15:11.029 merits. Both merits and demerits are about you. 00:15:12.029 --> 00:15:15.129 The purpose of the gospel is to point you away 00:15:15.129 --> 00:15:18.370 from yourself. And I think that's what you're 00:15:18.370 --> 00:15:21.769 saying. Yeah. You know, point your point you 00:15:21.769 --> 00:15:25.669 away from yourself free from the self obsessed 00:15:25.669 --> 00:15:30.480 burden of your own story. and center you on Christ. 00:15:32.399 --> 00:15:35.440 You don't need to generate merit in order to 00:15:35.440 --> 00:15:38.519 be saved. You need instead to come unto Christ 00:15:38.519 --> 00:15:42.100 and rely wholly upon the merits of him who is 00:15:42.100 --> 00:15:45.379 mighty to save. The gospel points wholly to Christ 00:15:45.379 --> 00:15:48.700 and his grace, keeping the law of the gospel. 00:15:49.200 --> 00:15:52.399 is the work of relying on Christ merits, not 00:15:52.399 --> 00:15:54.820 the work of generating your own. It's still hard 00:15:54.820 --> 00:15:57.100 work, but it's a work of an entirely different 00:15:57.100 --> 00:16:00.019 kind. And so when you shared that story, I mean, 00:16:00.179 --> 00:16:03.480 that was, that's exactly where I went again to, 00:16:04.139 --> 00:16:07.539 I got, get out of the way. That kind of goes 00:16:07.539 --> 00:16:10.220 a little bit contrary to what the spiritual axiom, 00:16:10.320 --> 00:16:12.700 the spiritual axiom says, when I'm disturbed, 00:16:13.059 --> 00:16:14.679 something's wrong with me. So that is pointing 00:16:14.679 --> 00:16:17.809 towards me, right? Yeah. But it's not really. 00:16:18.309 --> 00:16:21.070 No. The disturbance is pointing towards me. Yeah. 00:16:21.230 --> 00:16:24.870 The solution's pointing away from me. Yeah. That's 00:16:24.870 --> 00:16:28.730 the point, right? That's really cool. Because 00:16:28.730 --> 00:16:33.450 it's, but it is, I can't fix me. Yeah. Neither 00:16:33.450 --> 00:16:37.710 can I for the record. No, she's tried. You still 00:16:37.710 --> 00:16:43.559 trying? No, I'm okay. I'm I've retired. But But 00:16:43.559 --> 00:16:47.539 when I have the ability, and we talk about this, 00:16:47.639 --> 00:16:50.100 we've talked about it already, to turn my will 00:16:50.100 --> 00:16:52.000 in my life over the care of God as I understand 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:56.120 him, as I'm able to begin to do that and relying 00:16:56.120 --> 00:16:59.480 wholly on the merits of Christ, what you just 00:16:59.480 --> 00:17:02.840 read, recognizing that when there's disturbance, 00:17:03.320 --> 00:17:06.579 I have some onus here. I have some responsibility. 00:17:07.519 --> 00:17:10.140 But if I'm going to take care of this responsibility, 00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:13.059 if I'm going to sanctify, if I'm going to cleanse, 00:17:13.279 --> 00:17:15.759 if I'm going to make right the things that are 00:17:15.759 --> 00:17:19.980 wrong in taking this responsibility, I of myself 00:17:19.980 --> 00:17:23.779 am incapable of doing it. Yeah. So I need to 00:17:23.779 --> 00:17:29.619 rely on him. Yeah. You know, I always think of 00:17:29.619 --> 00:17:32.539 a two year old when they say by myself, I'll 00:17:32.539 --> 00:17:36.339 do it by myself. And I have a bit I have a little 00:17:36.339 --> 00:17:37.960 two -year -old trapped in me that I'm like I 00:17:37.960 --> 00:17:41.299 got this I Leave me alone. I got this I'll do 00:17:41.299 --> 00:17:45.299 it by myself and I I mean in all aspects of my 00:17:45.299 --> 00:17:49.440 life I don't I'm not one to you know ask for 00:17:49.440 --> 00:17:54.130 help. I'm not one to Anyway, so it's it's a two 00:17:54.130 --> 00:17:56.630 -year -old attitude that has lived with me for 00:17:56.630 --> 00:18:00.509 a long time that I get to change I I can't do 00:18:00.509 --> 00:18:03.069 all of this by myself. I need to rely wholly 00:18:03.069 --> 00:18:06.609 upon him Interestingly enough, and I shared this 00:18:06.609 --> 00:18:09.849 a little bit last week when I get in a place 00:18:09.849 --> 00:18:12.789 where Okay, I've got myself cornered. I fell 00:18:12.789 --> 00:18:16.150 in this pit or whatever That's when it's like 00:18:16.150 --> 00:18:20.329 I don't have any other choice my goal now is 00:18:20.329 --> 00:18:24.819 to have that reliance, not in a pickle, not in 00:18:24.819 --> 00:18:29.079 a hole, not in a corner. Oh, so I want to know 00:18:29.079 --> 00:18:34.019 how you practice that. Not when you're in desperate 00:18:34.019 --> 00:18:38.720 need, compelled, yes, yes, to be humble. Yes. 00:18:39.299 --> 00:18:45.400 Sometimes also known as humiliated. Yeah. And 00:18:45.400 --> 00:18:49.420 that requires faith. Yeah. And that's really 00:18:49.420 --> 00:18:52.720 kind of what it boils down to. One of the things 00:18:52.720 --> 00:18:56.420 that I brought with me when I came to Alcoholics 00:18:56.420 --> 00:18:59.920 Anonymous among the myriad of other character 00:18:59.920 --> 00:19:03.220 defects, but my greatest, and I honestly believe 00:19:03.220 --> 00:19:07.440 that my greatest character defect was fear. It 00:19:07.440 --> 00:19:11.099 seemed to be the underlying problem to all other 00:19:11.099 --> 00:19:17.599 defects. I brought to Alcoholics Anonymous major 00:19:17.599 --> 00:19:21.480 anger issues. I brought to Alcoholics Anonymous 00:19:21.480 --> 00:19:25.700 major insecurity issues. I brought with me major, 00:19:26.180 --> 00:19:29.059 you name it, any kind of detachment disorder, 00:19:29.220 --> 00:19:33.980 any kind of PTSD, any kind of, and I know that 00:19:35.230 --> 00:19:37.690 I know that we all have varying degrees and there's 00:19:37.690 --> 00:19:41.029 no way I want to get into a situation where I'm 00:19:41.029 --> 00:19:43.450 trying to talk to somebody and have them explain 00:19:43.450 --> 00:19:45.829 to me how much worse or how much worse mine is. 00:19:45.990 --> 00:19:49.029 That's irrelevant. What's relevant here is that 00:19:49.029 --> 00:19:51.410 we are bumping up against the problems that come 00:19:51.410 --> 00:19:53.250 at us because of the fall of Adam and Eve, the 00:19:53.250 --> 00:19:56.589 stuff that we've talked about. And I need a place 00:19:56.589 --> 00:19:59.490 for relief. I need to find a place for relief. 00:20:00.210 --> 00:20:03.269 And if that place is really what we have proposed 00:20:03.269 --> 00:20:07.230 that it is, Higher power our heavenly Father 00:20:07.230 --> 00:20:10.809 through his son Jesus Christ administered to 00:20:10.809 --> 00:20:13.650 us by the Holy Ghost If that's really what it 00:20:13.650 --> 00:20:15.849 is and how do we access it? How do we get it? 00:20:16.029 --> 00:20:18.150 How do we bring this into our lives? I think 00:20:18.150 --> 00:20:20.190 that's what we need to start talking about as 00:20:20.190 --> 00:20:22.769 you were sharing that I was thinking about what 00:20:22.769 --> 00:20:25.990 are ways that I am Coming on to him. How do I 00:20:25.990 --> 00:20:28.490 hear him hear harkening heat or the words that 00:20:28.490 --> 00:20:31.089 are coming to me? And you know attending the 00:20:31.089 --> 00:20:34.609 temple and communing and being still yeah, that 00:20:34.609 --> 00:20:39.109 is One of the hardest things in today's world 00:20:39.109 --> 00:20:43.349 that I think we do is to be still because we 00:20:43.349 --> 00:20:45.630 live in a very fast world. We live in a very 00:20:45.630 --> 00:20:49.470 fast -paced life and everything is at our fingertips. 00:20:49.829 --> 00:20:51.910 Just quick, quick, quick, quick. When I go into 00:20:51.910 --> 00:20:56.289 that celestial room and I am just silent and 00:20:56.289 --> 00:21:01.630 still, I feel him. I know he's there. When I 00:21:01.630 --> 00:21:06.119 partake of the sacrament on Sundays, And I shut 00:21:06.119 --> 00:21:10.180 everything else out to the point of I can't really 00:21:10.180 --> 00:21:12.759 even hear the noise in the chapel of whatever 00:21:12.759 --> 00:21:16.259 else is going on. That I really commune with 00:21:16.259 --> 00:21:23.039 him. That's being still and that is, you know, 00:21:23.259 --> 00:21:26.259 seeking here, Harkin and Heed. Because I get 00:21:26.259 --> 00:21:29.279 downloads. I mean, it's like there's some promptings 00:21:29.279 --> 00:21:32.180 that come. There's some thoughts that come that 00:21:32.180 --> 00:21:35.579 are super sacred. But what do you say to those 00:21:35.579 --> 00:21:37.160 of us who don't feel like we're getting that 00:21:37.160 --> 00:21:41.359 right now? I mean, I'm gonna I'm gonna we're 00:21:41.359 --> 00:21:43.779 gonna talk about this tonight because this is 00:21:43.779 --> 00:21:47.359 really where we begin to talk about faith, you 00:21:47.359 --> 00:21:50.319 know, you just told me that you get downloads. 00:21:50.619 --> 00:21:52.539 You just told me that you... Not every time. 00:21:52.660 --> 00:21:55.099 Well, okay. Yeah. But you just told me that you 00:21:55.099 --> 00:21:57.759 commune with him or hear Harkin and Heed and 00:21:57.759 --> 00:22:00.200 all these things. And that's lovely. And I love 00:22:00.200 --> 00:22:02.700 that. And I know that you haven't always had 00:22:02.700 --> 00:22:05.660 that experience though. And I know I haven't 00:22:05.660 --> 00:22:08.279 always had that experience. And I know that prior 00:22:08.279 --> 00:22:12.700 to having the faith, I'll say it today, that 00:22:12.700 --> 00:22:15.339 prior to having the type of faith that I have 00:22:15.339 --> 00:22:18.619 today, it didn't come easy for me. Yeah, it wasn't 00:22:18.619 --> 00:22:21.980 it wasn't so easy as to say I'm gonna go to the 00:22:21.980 --> 00:22:23.599 temple and everything's gonna feel better Well 00:22:23.599 --> 00:22:26.559 first of all if I wasn't invited into the temple 00:22:26.559 --> 00:22:31.619 at this point in my life, but So many other things 00:22:31.619 --> 00:22:35.019 too, you know, I just didn't know I should have 00:22:35.019 --> 00:22:37.359 you know because I had had experiences in the 00:22:37.359 --> 00:22:40.640 past but when I'm in those dark spots Deb, I 00:22:40.640 --> 00:22:44.460 don't remember this stuff and And not only that, 00:22:44.880 --> 00:22:48.940 but faith seems like a distant dream sometimes. 00:22:49.299 --> 00:22:51.259 You know what? That's a really good point because 00:22:51.259 --> 00:22:55.519 I don't always feel it every time, but I have 00:22:55.519 --> 00:23:00.000 felt it. And so I think I'm going to a personal 00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:03.299 inventory now because I know that I have felt 00:23:03.299 --> 00:23:07.579 it before and I know that I have. received downloads 00:23:07.579 --> 00:23:10.220 that I have had a communion that it is possible. 00:23:10.519 --> 00:23:14.000 Do I get it every time? No, absolutely not. So 00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:19.660 I think, and this is kind of my own thing is, 00:23:19.920 --> 00:23:22.089 you know, I should journal that. So that I can 00:23:22.089 --> 00:23:25.089 remember those sacred moments. I do remember 00:23:25.089 --> 00:23:28.470 one time being in the temple seeking for an answer. 00:23:28.930 --> 00:23:31.529 I can't tell you what it was, but I remember 00:23:31.529 --> 00:23:34.029 I was all by myself and I went to the temple 00:23:34.029 --> 00:23:37.849 and I was weepy. I had, you know, it was a little 00:23:37.849 --> 00:23:40.589 emotional and I had opened the scriptures and 00:23:40.589 --> 00:23:44.829 I don't always seek, search for scriptures for 00:23:44.829 --> 00:23:47.630 answers because it's just not always been. I 00:23:47.630 --> 00:23:51.259 do now, but it has not always been an easy. Answer 00:23:51.259 --> 00:23:54.180 for me and I remember sitting in the celestial 00:23:54.180 --> 00:23:57.619 room opening the scriptures and I put my finger 00:23:57.619 --> 00:24:01.079 down and I read it and I was like whoa that is 00:24:01.079 --> 00:24:03.980 Profound I wish I would have wrote it down because 00:24:03.980 --> 00:24:06.579 I can't remember to this day what it was. I mean, 00:24:06.579 --> 00:24:09.140 that's that's that personal inventory That's 00:24:09.140 --> 00:24:11.140 that journaling. I wish I would have written 00:24:11.140 --> 00:24:13.539 down because that's a testifier. I remember the 00:24:13.539 --> 00:24:15.160 moment I don't remember the scripture. I don't 00:24:15.160 --> 00:24:17.000 remember the question I don't remember any of 00:24:17.000 --> 00:24:19.599 that, but I know that happened. Yeah, you know 00:24:20.089 --> 00:24:22.170 Yeah, I think that you're bringing up a point 00:24:22.170 --> 00:24:23.809 maybe getting a little ahead of ourselves here, 00:24:23.910 --> 00:24:27.890 but you know, how do you how do you how do you 00:24:27.890 --> 00:24:30.990 gain more faith or how do you maintain faith? 00:24:31.509 --> 00:24:33.900 It would be good to have that journal. to go 00:24:33.900 --> 00:24:36.319 back and revisit that experience or something 00:24:36.319 --> 00:24:39.799 about rereading or revisiting those types of 00:24:39.799 --> 00:24:43.339 experiences that imprint spiritually, sometimes 00:24:43.339 --> 00:24:46.240 indelibly, and I think that's the goal in our 00:24:46.240 --> 00:24:48.880 hearts, those spiritual experiences. It's definitely 00:24:48.880 --> 00:24:53.400 the case for me. But I will say this, I had faith 00:24:53.400 --> 00:24:55.579 growing up, you know, and I was taught right. 00:24:55.900 --> 00:24:59.509 And when I wandered, my faith went with it. My 00:24:59.509 --> 00:25:04.049 faith went away. It dissipated a lot. And when 00:25:04.049 --> 00:25:07.089 I made the decision and choice to come back, 00:25:08.130 --> 00:25:11.309 regaining faith was an interesting process for 00:25:11.309 --> 00:25:15.730 me because I had come to doubt a lot of things, 00:25:16.069 --> 00:25:19.130 mostly in my own divinity. You know, mostly the 00:25:19.130 --> 00:25:21.130 doubts were around the things that we talk about 00:25:21.130 --> 00:25:25.450 very early in the podcast season. who I am, who's 00:25:25.450 --> 00:25:27.250 I am, you know, those kinds of things. Those 00:25:27.250 --> 00:25:31.289 were the biggest part of my doubts. But what 00:25:31.289 --> 00:25:34.650 I found was is that there was so much fear in 00:25:34.650 --> 00:25:36.450 the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous actually 00:25:36.450 --> 00:25:39.230 talks about this. There was so much fear inside 00:25:39.230 --> 00:25:42.069 of me that there was very little room for faith, 00:25:42.609 --> 00:25:44.869 because faith and fear can't really reside in 00:25:44.869 --> 00:25:47.950 the same spot. Do you think that's what got, 00:25:48.390 --> 00:25:52.369 I mean, maybe encouraged you? I mean, when you 00:25:52.369 --> 00:25:55.039 said I had faith, But it wasn't enough. And then 00:25:55.039 --> 00:25:59.019 I, yeah, absolutely. The memory or the rememberings. 00:25:59.640 --> 00:26:03.599 Absolutely. Definitely. You know, to the to the 00:26:03.599 --> 00:26:06.619 credit of my parents, my family, others. Yeah, 00:26:06.720 --> 00:26:11.359 absolutely. That definitely did. But again, my 00:26:11.359 --> 00:26:13.319 question is, and I don't know that we're answering 00:26:13.319 --> 00:26:17.279 it. If somebody says, I don't have faith, how 00:26:17.279 --> 00:26:21.579 do I get faith? What do you say to that? You'll 00:26:21.579 --> 00:26:24.099 remember this you love this too. I know you do 00:26:24.099 --> 00:26:29.259 because we talked about it in Institute I'm gonna 00:26:29.259 --> 00:26:35.059 go to Alma chapter 32 This tells us this is the 00:26:35.059 --> 00:26:38.259 recipe now if you will awake and arouse your 00:26:38.259 --> 00:26:42.539 faculty's 27 I'm gonna start in 27 and I'll just 00:26:42.539 --> 00:26:46.480 keep reading till I'm done Now behold if you 00:26:46.480 --> 00:26:48.799 will awaken around your faculties even to an 00:26:48.799 --> 00:26:52.339 experiment on my words Okay, so I think that's 00:26:52.339 --> 00:26:56.799 the first key exercise a particle of faith Even 00:26:56.799 --> 00:27:00.319 if you can no more than desire to believe let 00:27:00.319 --> 00:27:03.700 this desire work in you Even until you believe 00:27:03.700 --> 00:27:06.700 in a manner that you can give place for a portion 00:27:06.700 --> 00:27:11.740 of my words Okay, let's break that down What's 00:27:11.740 --> 00:27:14.900 happening what what's being said? You just need 00:27:14.900 --> 00:27:17.619 a particle of faith and you just need a desire 00:27:17.619 --> 00:27:21.299 to have faith. Yeah. Just I just want to have 00:27:21.299 --> 00:27:24.859 faith is sometimes enough. That's a jumping off 00:27:24.859 --> 00:27:28.599 place. Yeah. I just have a desire. I hope. Right. 00:27:28.779 --> 00:27:31.640 I just have a little hope, a little desire. And 00:27:31.640 --> 00:27:34.980 that's a jumping off place. And now in 28. Now 00:27:34.980 --> 00:27:39.109 I will compare the word unto a seed. Now, if 00:27:39.109 --> 00:27:42.490 you give place, that a seed may be planted in 00:27:42.490 --> 00:27:45.390 your heart, behold, if it be a true or a good 00:27:45.390 --> 00:27:48.869 seed. If you do not cast it out by your unbelief, 00:27:48.990 --> 00:27:50.549 that you will resist the spirit of the Lord, 00:27:50.769 --> 00:27:53.809 behold, it will begin to swell within your breasts. 00:27:54.029 --> 00:27:56.730 And when you fill these swelling motions, you 00:27:56.730 --> 00:27:59.849 will begin to say within yourselves, it must 00:27:59.849 --> 00:28:02.309 needs be that this is a good seed or that the 00:28:02.309 --> 00:28:05.450 word is good, for it begineth to enlarge my soul. 00:28:05.769 --> 00:28:08.730 Ye it begineth to enlighten my understanding, 00:28:09.329 --> 00:28:12.930 ye it begineth to be delicious to me. And now 00:28:12.930 --> 00:28:16.809 behold, would not this increase your faith? I 00:28:16.809 --> 00:28:20.049 say unto you, ye, nevertheless, it has not grown 00:28:20.049 --> 00:28:24.809 up unto a perfect knowledge. I think that's interesting. 00:28:25.569 --> 00:28:28.390 At that very last part, you know, even though 00:28:28.390 --> 00:28:31.670 it's not grown into a perfect knowledge, is this 00:28:31.670 --> 00:28:36.369 not sufficient enough faith for you? I also think 00:28:36.369 --> 00:28:39.589 in 27 where it said desire, if you look at the 00:28:39.589 --> 00:28:43.150 cross reference on there, it says motivations 00:28:43.150 --> 00:28:46.950 and teachable. So if we are motivated to have 00:28:46.950 --> 00:28:50.710 faith and if we are teachable or willing, you 00:28:50.710 --> 00:28:55.250 know, I think that's that's desire. Yeah. And 00:28:55.250 --> 00:28:57.529 don't you always say gratitude is the first? 00:28:58.150 --> 00:29:01.349 Yeah. Yeah. Gratitude is the beat. beginning 00:29:01.349 --> 00:29:05.549 of desire, right? And desire obviously such an 00:29:05.549 --> 00:29:08.970 important component. So, Doug, when we read, 00:29:09.430 --> 00:29:12.549 when we compare it to a seed, it's planted in 00:29:12.549 --> 00:29:15.569 our heart. If it's a good seed, we don't cast 00:29:15.569 --> 00:29:19.329 it out with unbelief or resist the spirit of 00:29:19.329 --> 00:29:21.730 the Lord. Behold, it will begin to swell within 00:29:21.730 --> 00:29:26.359 us. Okay. So, a little tiny seed of faith begins 00:29:26.359 --> 00:29:28.900 to swell within us. What is that swelling? I 00:29:28.900 --> 00:29:30.940 don't want you to answer this yet, but think 00:29:30.940 --> 00:29:32.680 about this, and this is to our listeners too. 00:29:32.819 --> 00:29:35.720 What does this swelling do? What is that? How 00:29:35.720 --> 00:29:37.839 does that motivate me? How does that change me? 00:29:37.980 --> 00:29:39.960 How does that make my life different when this 00:29:39.960 --> 00:29:42.240 swelling within my breast of this seed of faith? 00:29:42.720 --> 00:29:44.599 And when you feel these swelling motions and 00:29:44.599 --> 00:29:46.420 begin to say within yourself, it must need to 00:29:46.420 --> 00:29:48.599 be that this is a good seed or that the word 00:29:48.599 --> 00:29:51.859 is good because it began to enlarge my soul. 00:29:52.240 --> 00:29:55.660 OK, so it swells in me and now it's enlarging 00:29:55.660 --> 00:29:57.500 my soul. What does that look like? And again, 00:29:57.559 --> 00:29:59.559 let's not talk about that right now, but something 00:29:59.559 --> 00:30:03.640 for us to consider privately. How can or how 00:30:03.640 --> 00:30:07.680 does or how has faith enlarged my soul and what 00:30:07.680 --> 00:30:11.990 does enlarging my soul look like? Right? What 00:30:11.990 --> 00:30:17.150 does that even mean? Make me more what? How can 00:30:17.150 --> 00:30:20.289 I be a benefit or how can having an enlarged 00:30:20.289 --> 00:30:24.250 soul be good? We'll come back to that. It began 00:30:24.250 --> 00:30:27.829 to enlighten my understanding. So it swells within 00:30:27.829 --> 00:30:31.970 me. It enlarges my soul and now it's enlightening 00:30:31.970 --> 00:30:36.210 my understanding. So because it's enlightening 00:30:36.210 --> 00:30:40.339 my understanding of what? So, let's go back to 00:30:40.339 --> 00:30:43.900 a scenario for me, you know, when I entered the 00:30:43.900 --> 00:30:47.059 rooms of recovery. I didn't have a lot of faith 00:30:47.059 --> 00:30:50.359 in recovery. I had tried to quit drinking, and 00:30:50.359 --> 00:30:53.160 I told you, and I say this jokingly, but it's 00:30:53.160 --> 00:30:55.859 true, multiple times a day sometimes I would 00:30:55.859 --> 00:30:59.400 quit. I just couldn't stay quit. But when I began 00:30:59.400 --> 00:31:03.660 to find Heavenly Father's help through rooms 00:31:03.660 --> 00:31:07.640 of recovery, etc. And I planted that little seed 00:31:07.640 --> 00:31:11.059 and it began to swell in me and it began to enlarge 00:31:11.059 --> 00:31:14.279 my soul and then it began to enlighten my understanding, 00:31:14.359 --> 00:31:16.920 enlighten my understanding of a lot of things. 00:31:17.160 --> 00:31:20.539 Most importantly, who I was, whose I was. Even 00:31:20.539 --> 00:31:22.880 maybe more important, now maybe not more important. 00:31:23.039 --> 00:31:26.180 But he and then next unto that, next in line 00:31:26.180 --> 00:31:29.339 of importance to that is that not only was I 00:31:29.690 --> 00:31:33.670 Divinely his not only was had I entered a covenant 00:31:33.670 --> 00:31:36.589 relationship So now I was not just heavenly fathers, 00:31:36.589 --> 00:31:40.250 but also a child of Christ and because of all 00:31:40.250 --> 00:31:43.970 of that I had access to blessings that could 00:31:43.970 --> 00:31:48.490 Enlighten me enlarge my soul swell in my breast 00:31:48.490 --> 00:31:51.730 and that faith became like a helix, you know, 00:31:51.730 --> 00:31:56.829 it began to gain power Because of the power that 00:31:56.829 --> 00:32:00.579 I was having there. I was able to momentum Exactly. 00:32:00.980 --> 00:32:04.579 I was able to get another day sober and yet another 00:32:04.579 --> 00:32:07.539 day sober and yet another day sober. And then 00:32:07.539 --> 00:32:10.400 finally it says in ye it beganeth to be delicious 00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:13.400 to me. And I think that's interesting. You know, 00:32:13.420 --> 00:32:15.400 we're talking about a seed. This is incidental. 00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:18.339 I've just kind of put this in your Jewish collection, 00:32:18.660 --> 00:32:20.279 but we're talking about the seed talked about 00:32:20.279 --> 00:32:23.019 in verse 28 and those three four adjectives that 00:32:23.019 --> 00:32:26.019 I use swell within your breast, I guess as a 00:32:26.019 --> 00:32:28.559 verb, not an adjective swell within your breasts. 00:32:29.099 --> 00:32:34.180 It began as to enlarge so se my soul and it began 00:32:34.180 --> 00:32:38.599 as to Enlighten so se and then it began as to 00:32:38.599 --> 00:32:41.480 be delicious D the spell seed kind of cool I 00:32:41.480 --> 00:32:43.640 know I have it marked in my physical scriptures 00:32:43.640 --> 00:32:47.299 and my digital But let's not that let's not let 00:32:47.299 --> 00:32:50.400 the coolness of that little anecdote there distract 00:32:50.400 --> 00:32:52.740 us from the importance of what we're talking 00:32:52.740 --> 00:32:57.259 about. Yeah Faith. Yeah, just the smallest desire 00:32:57.640 --> 00:33:00.839 And it's so important. I mean, we can't skip 00:33:00.839 --> 00:33:03.740 past faith when it comes to putting on the Atonement 00:33:03.740 --> 00:33:06.680 of Jesus Christ, when it comes to overcoming 00:33:06.680 --> 00:33:10.339 everything in the fallen world, we have to talk 00:33:10.339 --> 00:33:13.599 about faith and how do we get it, why it's important, 00:33:13.720 --> 00:33:17.119 etc. I think there's different things that we 00:33:17.119 --> 00:33:19.359 can exercise our faith in because there's things 00:33:19.359 --> 00:33:22.259 that I don't have a lot of faith in right now. 00:33:22.859 --> 00:33:25.599 I mean that I could, you know, plant that seed 00:33:25.599 --> 00:33:30.960 and Have a desire to to have that that piece 00:33:30.960 --> 00:33:35.680 of You know grow I mean faith is not just a general 00:33:35.680 --> 00:33:38.539 Knowledge if I have faith everything in my life 00:33:38.539 --> 00:33:41.579 is going to be wonderful. It's like there's there's 00:33:41.579 --> 00:33:45.059 certain voids in my life that You know that I 00:33:45.059 --> 00:33:47.319 need to plant one of them. I'm gonna tell on 00:33:47.319 --> 00:33:50.579 myself Fasting and keeping the Sabbath day holy. 00:33:50.900 --> 00:33:55.450 I think that's that's one of the one of the Things 00:33:55.450 --> 00:33:59.670 that I really truly need to exercise faith in 00:33:59.670 --> 00:34:04.029 have a desire have a have a better understanding 00:34:04.029 --> 00:34:08.070 of You know, I used to be a great faster. I used 00:34:08.070 --> 00:34:11.150 to be you know Keeping the Sabbath day holy was 00:34:11.150 --> 00:34:15.789 not an issue now. I'm just Now I am just a little 00:34:15.789 --> 00:34:18.849 bit lazy in it It's like oh, I forgot to go to 00:34:18.849 --> 00:34:20.170 the store. I'm just gonna run pick something 00:34:20.170 --> 00:34:23.050 up. Oh, I'm hungry. Let's just go grab something 00:34:23.050 --> 00:34:27.769 to eat So it's that's definitely an area where 00:34:27.769 --> 00:34:30.849 I could exercise my own faith man. I am really 00:34:30.849 --> 00:34:35.829 telling on myself Well, what do you say to the 00:34:35.829 --> 00:34:38.769 person though we have listeners who are struggling 00:34:38.769 --> 00:34:42.690 I got an email just the other day from we got 00:34:42.690 --> 00:34:45.130 an email in the podcast just the other day from 00:34:45.880 --> 00:34:48.119 from one of our listeners who's really struggling 00:34:48.119 --> 00:34:51.139 in a relationship, not just a relationship with 00:34:51.139 --> 00:34:53.699 the spouse, but a relationship in the family. 00:34:54.400 --> 00:34:56.119 You know, the whole family seems to be falling 00:34:56.119 --> 00:35:02.219 apart and just so much wants to be able to believe 00:35:02.219 --> 00:35:07.139 that there can be change and hope for them. So 00:35:07.139 --> 00:35:10.739 this person, as they were Sharing this with me 00:35:10.739 --> 00:35:13.960 shared a desire. I just wish I had more faith 00:35:13.960 --> 00:35:16.280 I just wish I had faith that Heavenly Father 00:35:16.280 --> 00:35:19.000 could heal us or that he would heal us I think 00:35:19.000 --> 00:35:20.960 that that was the point, you know, I talked about 00:35:20.960 --> 00:35:23.840 how I used to believe I knew that God could and 00:35:23.840 --> 00:35:26.219 would if he were sought You know, we say that 00:35:26.219 --> 00:35:28.000 in alcoholics anonymous all the time that God 00:35:28.000 --> 00:35:30.239 could and he would if he were sought if we just 00:35:30.239 --> 00:35:32.260 seek him I was believed he could and I always 00:35:32.260 --> 00:35:34.760 believed he would for you but not for me And 00:35:34.760 --> 00:35:37.059 I think that's what this person's saying. So 00:35:37.059 --> 00:35:39.530 Deb, where do we shift that? Where do I come 00:35:39.530 --> 00:35:42.809 up with that faith that he will for me to you're 00:35:42.809 --> 00:35:46.570 kind of chasing the tail here because if he were 00:35:46.570 --> 00:35:52.730 sought is a step of faith and Believing that 00:35:52.730 --> 00:35:56.909 he would could and would is a step of faith, 00:35:57.269 --> 00:36:00.130 right? So I mean it's a I mean that screams faith 00:36:00.130 --> 00:36:04.769 to me God couldn't would if he were sought so 00:36:05.079 --> 00:36:09.360 He could is a faith. He would is faith. And if 00:36:09.360 --> 00:36:12.019 he were sought is happening faith. So it's like 00:36:12.019 --> 00:36:14.260 that just oozes faith. You know what occurs to 00:36:14.260 --> 00:36:16.500 me and miss kind of maybe my experience with 00:36:16.500 --> 00:36:23.340 all of this was when I really needed help. That's 00:36:23.340 --> 00:36:26.300 what I'm saying. You're compelled. I know I'm 00:36:26.300 --> 00:36:29.320 always better at seeking. And that's fine. I 00:36:29.320 --> 00:36:31.260 mean, if that's how we have to come by our faith, 00:36:31.400 --> 00:36:33.340 then so be it. I don't want to do it in pain. 00:36:34.670 --> 00:36:36.969 Okay, but I can't push rewind so this is the 00:36:36.969 --> 00:36:40.710 way it was and it is for me. When I was going 00:36:40.710 --> 00:36:46.139 through the worst part of it. of whatever I got 00:36:46.139 --> 00:36:49.239 I remember I wrote a little story wrote it out 00:36:49.239 --> 00:36:52.239 on my 15th anniversary of sobriety remember I 00:36:52.239 --> 00:36:54.440 went back and reread that I won't burden our 00:36:54.440 --> 00:36:56.500 listeners with that today but I went back and 00:36:56.500 --> 00:37:00.840 reread that and it really reminded me of the 00:37:00.840 --> 00:37:03.179 point of desperation where I was at one point 00:37:03.179 --> 00:37:06.420 in my life I was bankrupt spiritually bankrupt 00:37:06.420 --> 00:37:09.980 financially bankrupt emotionally bankrupt I was 00:37:09.980 --> 00:37:14.079 bankrupt I Every level I had nothing more to 00:37:14.079 --> 00:37:17.940 offer to life period and and I really saw it 00:37:17.940 --> 00:37:22.599 that way There that's in the end we read about 00:37:22.599 --> 00:37:25.159 you know in Alma and we're gonna talk to Nick 00:37:25.159 --> 00:37:27.380 in a couple of weeks about this scripture that 00:37:27.380 --> 00:37:30.300 touched him so much but I felt like I was snatched 00:37:30.300 --> 00:37:34.239 to and When I when I felt like I was snatched 00:37:34.239 --> 00:37:41.940 out of that situation I Knew that If there was 00:37:41.940 --> 00:37:44.460 a God and I believe that there was and that if 00:37:44.460 --> 00:37:46.840 he loved me and that's where I had difficulty 00:37:46.840 --> 00:37:49.940 with my belief is because How could he love me? 00:37:50.079 --> 00:37:52.480 I had to let him down. How could he be happy 00:37:52.480 --> 00:37:55.000 with me? How could he have any kind of hope in 00:37:55.000 --> 00:37:57.320 me? I had broken all the commandments I had done 00:37:57.320 --> 00:37:59.460 gone contrary to all the things that he wanted 00:37:59.460 --> 00:38:04.110 me to do And so I had it I was indicted I was 00:38:04.110 --> 00:38:07.309 indicted by myself. I was indicted by my beliefs 00:38:07.309 --> 00:38:10.210 by the systemic judgment of the church and everything 00:38:10.210 --> 00:38:15.389 else, right? So my faith came by through desperation, 00:38:15.590 --> 00:38:19.570 kind of a crying out. Well, it sounds like you 00:38:19.570 --> 00:38:21.610 had a little desire in there. There was a ton 00:38:21.610 --> 00:38:23.429 of desire. And I think that's where it begins, 00:38:23.670 --> 00:38:27.610 right? And that's, again, what we just read is 00:38:27.610 --> 00:38:32.030 no more than desire to believe. There you go. 00:38:32.530 --> 00:38:35.829 I mean, That's in a seed. I mean, especially 00:38:35.829 --> 00:38:37.469 when they compare it to a mustard seed, I know 00:38:37.469 --> 00:38:39.989 it doesn't refer to a mustard seed in here, but 00:38:39.989 --> 00:38:43.230 I have a little tiny pendant that has a teeny, 00:38:43.250 --> 00:38:47.090 tiny mustard seed in it. It's not very big. And 00:38:47.090 --> 00:38:53.090 if we have that enough desire to seek and to 00:38:53.090 --> 00:38:57.510 nourish, I mean, he will cause that swelling. 00:38:58.110 --> 00:39:02.090 He will enlarge it. He will enlighten it. and 00:39:02.090 --> 00:39:06.630 it will be delicious. I mean, it truly is. You 00:39:06.630 --> 00:39:10.309 know, put it to practice. Just focus on one thing, 00:39:10.429 --> 00:39:12.230 and I gave you two that I'm good at work on, 00:39:12.949 --> 00:39:16.730 that I, you know, put that to practice. He wouldn't, 00:39:16.730 --> 00:39:19.190 couldn't would if he were sought. Am I seeking 00:39:19.190 --> 00:39:22.989 out? I mean, am I, do I really want this? Do 00:39:22.989 --> 00:39:27.369 I really have a desire? So it's it's one of the 00:39:27.369 --> 00:39:29.190 things that we have to ask ourselves What is 00:39:29.190 --> 00:39:31.989 it that I need to work on? What is it that I 00:39:31.989 --> 00:39:36.349 need to focus on? How can I become who I'm meant 00:39:36.349 --> 00:39:39.250 to become? Well, and I guess for me it always 00:39:39.250 --> 00:39:43.130 boils down to why why do I want that? For me, 00:39:43.630 --> 00:39:46.230 it's because by contrast I don't want the other, 00:39:46.489 --> 00:39:49.710 for sure. And it's even more than just a contrast. 00:39:50.090 --> 00:39:53.289 It's the inviting invitation come unto me. It's 00:39:53.289 --> 00:39:55.889 the inviting invitation to, you know, take my 00:39:55.889 --> 00:39:59.369 yoke upon you for my yoke is easy and my burden 00:39:59.369 --> 00:40:03.230 is light and all of that. But I think that to 00:40:03.230 --> 00:40:06.929 the level that I'm willing to exercise a particle 00:40:06.929 --> 00:40:09.969 of faith that my Heavenly Father more than meets 00:40:09.969 --> 00:40:14.139 me. As I as I do it and that can be in anything 00:40:14.139 --> 00:40:16.659 You know, there's so many things in my life right 00:40:16.659 --> 00:40:19.280 now where I need to exercise faith, you know 00:40:19.280 --> 00:40:24.139 faith in and trust and and In order for me to 00:40:24.139 --> 00:40:28.940 really do that I got to know him I Got to spend 00:40:28.940 --> 00:40:31.260 time with him like you said I got to go to the 00:40:31.260 --> 00:40:35.019 wherever I got to go to spend time with him I 00:40:35.019 --> 00:40:38.900 need to spend time with him to allow him to express 00:40:38.900 --> 00:40:40.659 his love to me. When was the last time you filled 00:40:40.659 --> 00:40:45.539 his love? Recently? Oh yeah. Today? Yeah. And 00:40:45.539 --> 00:40:48.480 if we could all fill his love on a daily basis 00:40:48.480 --> 00:40:50.679 or an hourly or even as frequent as possible. 00:40:50.679 --> 00:40:53.260 But I make an effort. I think that's the thing, 00:40:53.599 --> 00:40:57.460 the difference between me now and me then. But 00:40:57.460 --> 00:41:00.519 I make a conscious effort every single day to 00:41:00.519 --> 00:41:04.940 connect, to make time for the Savior. literally. 00:41:05.980 --> 00:41:08.800 And sometimes my prayers are brief and sometimes 00:41:08.800 --> 00:41:12.019 my prayers are deep and heartfelt. But every 00:41:12.019 --> 00:41:16.199 single day I have to make room for him. I have 00:41:16.199 --> 00:41:20.400 to because my life gets chaotic. I would bet 00:41:20.400 --> 00:41:23.500 that even your brief ones are heartfelt. And 00:41:23.500 --> 00:41:25.840 because that's who you are. And that's how that's 00:41:25.840 --> 00:41:29.480 how I think eventually we become as we begin 00:41:29.480 --> 00:41:33.730 to exercise. Faith. Faith in Jesus Christ. Faith 00:41:33.730 --> 00:41:36.889 in what? Faith in his love for me. Faith in his 00:41:36.889 --> 00:41:40.550 atonement. Faith in all of the cleansing things 00:41:40.550 --> 00:41:44.909 that come with it. Faith in ways that he can 00:41:44.909 --> 00:41:48.889 help me become stronger and break this brokenness 00:41:48.889 --> 00:41:54.289 part of me and heal. Give me a new heart. A broken 00:41:54.289 --> 00:41:56.889 heart is an open heart. There's certain areas 00:41:56.889 --> 00:42:00.659 I need a new heart in. This this kind of reminds 00:42:00.659 --> 00:42:04.000 me talking about faith reminds me of when we 00:42:04.000 --> 00:42:08.280 were in Bear Lake and our little Eden who was 00:42:08.280 --> 00:42:12.400 three at the time fell off a balcony and she 00:42:12.400 --> 00:42:17.940 she fell 15 feet and She hit her head and I was 00:42:17.940 --> 00:42:20.420 underneath the balcony and I watched her hit 00:42:20.420 --> 00:42:23.260 the con well I watched her hit the con the rock 00:42:23.260 --> 00:42:28.440 wall and then the concrete floor and I honestly 00:42:28.440 --> 00:42:31.800 thought I just watched a child go through the 00:42:31.800 --> 00:42:36.480 veil. That was my first thought. And as I knelt 00:42:36.480 --> 00:42:42.679 down over her, I literally just said, God, please 00:42:42.679 --> 00:42:50.079 be with this child. This was Jessica's second 00:42:50.079 --> 00:42:55.139 daughter, who she had. Gone through infertility 00:42:55.139 --> 00:42:58.960 and fought to get this little one here and I'm 00:42:58.960 --> 00:43:01.760 laying there watching this limp three -year -old 00:43:01.760 --> 00:43:12.059 and As she sat up on her own I Remember thinking 00:43:12.059 --> 00:43:16.659 this is a miracle and Then as we took her to 00:43:16.659 --> 00:43:19.940 the ambulance or called the ambulance to take 00:43:19.940 --> 00:43:23.610 her to the nearest hospital I followed that ambulance 00:43:23.610 --> 00:43:27.210 so close and I was like, this is a miracle. I 00:43:27.210 --> 00:43:30.949 had a tender, tender moment that I got to see 00:43:30.949 --> 00:43:33.489 my dad's hand who had already passed through 00:43:33.489 --> 00:43:37.989 the veil in that moment. And I knew I had faith 00:43:37.989 --> 00:43:42.309 that it was going to be okay. And then when we 00:43:42.309 --> 00:43:44.730 got to the hospital and found out that her skull 00:43:44.730 --> 00:43:50.150 had three cracks in it or two. And then she was 00:43:50.150 --> 00:43:52.469 life -flighted and this was during COVID. So 00:43:52.469 --> 00:43:54.869 Jessica wasn't able to go in the helicopter with 00:43:54.869 --> 00:44:01.929 her. And we talked and just prayed and I know 00:44:01.929 --> 00:44:04.989 that you were back at the cabin with Stevie. 00:44:05.809 --> 00:44:08.869 And I know you guys knelt and prayed. And I think 00:44:08.869 --> 00:44:12.809 that was a moment of faith that we could all, 00:44:12.969 --> 00:44:19.349 unitedly, plead. And we literally witnessed a 00:44:19.349 --> 00:44:22.269 miracle because when that child got to primary 00:44:22.269 --> 00:44:26.369 children's and they admitted her there was literally 00:44:26.369 --> 00:44:30.889 Now anybody in the medical world knows this is 00:44:30.889 --> 00:44:33.449 a full -blown miracle. You don't crack your skull 00:44:33.449 --> 00:44:39.670 without swelling or Interior or exterior bleeding 00:44:39.670 --> 00:44:43.480 and there wasn't And that child was released 00:44:43.480 --> 00:44:45.800 from that hospital within 24 hours and said, 00:44:45.980 --> 00:44:50.800 don't let her bumper head. Now, I, I under, I 00:44:50.800 --> 00:44:54.179 literally, when, when president Nielsen says 00:44:54.179 --> 00:44:58.739 seek and expect miracles, we literally witnessed, 00:44:59.179 --> 00:45:03.760 literally witnessed a miracle. I remember texting 00:45:03.760 --> 00:45:07.280 my family, pray for Eden, pray for Eden. So not 00:45:07.280 --> 00:45:12.050 only was there. That faith it was like now we 00:45:12.050 --> 00:45:17.630 need all Everyone yeah on on board And I think 00:45:17.630 --> 00:45:23.750 that was such a testimony builder for me To know 00:45:23.750 --> 00:45:28.309 To have faith that he would heal and to see that 00:45:28.309 --> 00:45:31.849 he did because that child she's seven now and 00:45:31.849 --> 00:45:34.909 You'd never guess she does make jokes about it 00:45:34.909 --> 00:45:38.949 a little spicy kid, but She is definitely a great, 00:45:38.949 --> 00:45:45.610 great one. Well, for every experience like that, 00:45:45.610 --> 00:45:48.289 though, there's there's a hundred of us that 00:45:48.289 --> 00:45:51.289 are, you know, just hoping to have enough faith 00:45:51.289 --> 00:45:53.690 to be able to drag ourselves out of bed in the 00:45:53.690 --> 00:45:56.369 morning because we're suffering from debilitating 00:45:56.369 --> 00:45:59.809 depression. For sure. There's there's hundreds 00:45:59.809 --> 00:46:03.050 of us that are suffering because I just can't 00:46:03.050 --> 00:46:06.409 put down the drug or the drink or the pornography 00:46:06.409 --> 00:46:09.530 addiction or whatever the case may be. There's 00:46:09.530 --> 00:46:13.429 a hundred of us and on and on and on and on. 00:46:14.090 --> 00:46:17.530 Yeah, you know, faith can come to us to some 00:46:17.530 --> 00:46:21.429 of us more easily at times than others, but it's 00:46:21.429 --> 00:46:23.789 important. And, you know, and I think next week 00:46:23.789 --> 00:46:25.769 we'll probably talk a little bit more about faith, 00:46:26.269 --> 00:46:29.929 about how to and through a relationship with 00:46:29.929 --> 00:46:33.530 him, faith becomes a more easy, a more natural 00:46:33.530 --> 00:46:37.150 process as we learn to love him and be with him 00:46:37.150 --> 00:46:40.309 and really learn to trust in him. Well, and I 00:46:40.309 --> 00:46:44.219 think, you know, faith doesn't. doesn't fix our 00:46:44.219 --> 00:46:48.539 circumstances. No. It transforms us. It teaches 00:46:48.539 --> 00:46:52.460 us just like that experience that was a testimony 00:46:52.460 --> 00:46:56.239 builder for me of what faith could do. Well, 00:46:56.360 --> 00:46:59.559 there was a story. We heard this at, and I'll 00:46:59.559 --> 00:47:02.989 end with this, but we heard this at Education 00:47:02.989 --> 00:47:05.570 week, you know, and I think Scott L. Anderson, 00:47:05.769 --> 00:47:08.090 I think is the one that told the story, and Elder 00:47:08.090 --> 00:47:11.349 Bednar actually tells the story very similar 00:47:11.349 --> 00:47:14.309 to this, and you know, I don't know if it's a 00:47:14.309 --> 00:47:17.210 different version of the same story, but here's 00:47:17.210 --> 00:47:22.489 the story. Yeah, so he shared a story about a 00:47:22.489 --> 00:47:24.650 family that had this three -year -old little 00:47:24.650 --> 00:47:27.369 girl that they took her into the hospital or 00:47:27.369 --> 00:47:29.920 into the emergency room. They basically said 00:47:29.920 --> 00:47:32.699 she's fine, sent her home while she was, was 00:47:32.699 --> 00:47:37.320 misdiagnosis. And she ended up going home and 00:47:37.320 --> 00:47:39.780 her appendix burst. And so they took her back 00:47:39.780 --> 00:47:41.960 to the hospital. They, they did everything they 00:47:41.960 --> 00:47:44.519 could and she, she went into surgery to get her 00:47:44.519 --> 00:47:49.699 appendix removed. And, and the mom was just pleading 00:47:49.699 --> 00:47:54.500 and, and fear. And she, she just prayed and prayed 00:47:54.500 --> 00:47:58.650 and prayed and, and she had this. feeling, do 00:47:58.650 --> 00:48:02.909 you have the faith for her to be healed? And 00:48:02.909 --> 00:48:08.070 she says, yeah, I mean, she's getting overwhelming 00:48:08.070 --> 00:48:10.610 feelings. And she says, do you have the faith 00:48:10.610 --> 00:48:14.170 that she won't be healed? And she didn't answer. 00:48:14.530 --> 00:48:18.230 And she said, for four hours, I wrestled with 00:48:18.230 --> 00:48:23.119 that. Do I have the faith for her not to be healed? 00:48:23.199 --> 00:48:25.260 Yeah, do I have the faith for her not to be healed? 00:48:25.900 --> 00:48:27.860 And she says she pondered it and pondered it 00:48:27.860 --> 00:48:30.219 and prayed and cried and prayed and cried and 00:48:30.219 --> 00:48:33.159 pondered it and she says four hours later I finally 00:48:33.159 --> 00:48:36.019 got back on my knees. I was all by myself and 00:48:36.019 --> 00:48:40.239 and I said, yeah, I'm I'm ready and within the 00:48:40.599 --> 00:48:43.699 you know, a very, very, very short period of 00:48:43.699 --> 00:48:46.699 time. Her three -year -old passed through the 00:48:46.699 --> 00:48:49.139 veil and she says, I had so much peace because 00:48:49.139 --> 00:48:52.480 of that faith. Not because it's easy to bury 00:48:52.480 --> 00:48:54.719 a child, not because it's easy to lose a child, 00:48:54.739 --> 00:48:59.340 but that she had the faith that it was God's 00:48:59.340 --> 00:49:02.820 will not hers. So again, faith doesn't change 00:49:02.820 --> 00:49:06.900 necessarily or fix our circumstances, but it 00:49:06.900 --> 00:49:11.059 can transform us. Yes, and it does. Right. Ken 00:49:11.059 --> 00:49:13.599 and Will, if we allow it. And I think that's 00:49:13.599 --> 00:49:15.719 where we go. You know, where do we need God's 00:49:15.719 --> 00:49:19.340 power right now? What would it look like if I 00:49:19.340 --> 00:49:21.440 could trust him there? Maybe that's our invitation 00:49:21.440 --> 00:49:24.280 for this week. You know, the desire and plant 00:49:24.280 --> 00:49:26.820 that tiny seed. We talk about personal inventory. 00:49:27.239 --> 00:49:29.400 We're inviting you, our listeners to take this 00:49:29.400 --> 00:49:31.699 same personal inventory and just ask yourself, 00:49:32.360 --> 00:49:35.460 where do you need God's power right now? And 00:49:35.460 --> 00:49:38.760 what would it look like if you could trust him 00:49:38.760 --> 00:49:44.380 wholly in that area? We just want to say to everybody 00:49:44.380 --> 00:49:46.480 that wherever you are, however you're feeling, 00:49:46.599 --> 00:49:48.800 we understand that this faith thing, and we will 00:49:48.800 --> 00:49:51.400 continue to talk about it a little bit, but we 00:49:51.400 --> 00:49:54.460 understand that it's extremely broad, and we 00:49:54.460 --> 00:49:56.460 understand that we all come with different levels 00:49:56.460 --> 00:49:59.239 of faith, depending on where we are and any given 00:49:59.239 --> 00:50:02.139 circumstance can change a lot of things for that. 00:50:02.219 --> 00:50:04.599 So it's a constant effort on our part. And we 00:50:04.599 --> 00:50:06.599 just need to remember that we don't have to have 00:50:06.599 --> 00:50:09.320 perfect faith. Jesus isn't waiting for us to 00:50:09.320 --> 00:50:11.840 get perfect in any of that. to get everything 00:50:11.840 --> 00:50:15.099 all cleaned up before we come to him. He just 00:50:15.099 --> 00:50:17.530 wants us to come to him. Yeah, he meets us right 00:50:17.530 --> 00:50:19.250 in the middle of our doubt, right in the middle 00:50:19.250 --> 00:50:22.829 of our mess. That's where his grace shines the 00:50:22.829 --> 00:50:25.309 brightest. That's where he can help us enlighten 00:50:25.309 --> 00:50:29.789 and enlarge and grow. So come as you are, broken, 00:50:30.250 --> 00:50:34.150 doubtful, hopeful, questioning, searching. You 00:50:34.150 --> 00:50:37.449 truly are not alone. And don't forget you can 00:50:37.449 --> 00:50:39.510 send emails to us. We'd love to hear from you. 00:50:39.650 --> 00:50:44.150 He redeems us at gmail .com. And if this episode 00:50:44.150 --> 00:50:46.269 touched your heart, we hope that you would share 00:50:46.269 --> 00:50:48.289 it with someone you love, a friend, a family 00:50:48.289 --> 00:50:50.309 member, anyone who could use a little bit more 00:50:50.309 --> 00:50:53.090 hope right now, which is all of us. And hope 00:50:53.090 --> 00:50:55.829 leads to faith. Yeah, it sure does. Yeah. So 00:50:55.829 --> 00:50:58.389 next week, you know, we'll talk more about, we're 00:50:58.389 --> 00:50:59.750 going to talk a little bit more about faith, 00:50:59.949 --> 00:51:01.829 how it can apply in our lives. We're going to 00:51:01.829 --> 00:51:03.949 talk about how he doesn't just redeem us. He 00:51:03.949 --> 00:51:07.269 heals us. He lifts us, He transforms us in our 00:51:07.269 --> 00:51:10.550 everyday lives and faith can really give us impetus 00:51:10.550 --> 00:51:13.489 to all of that. Thanks for being with us and 00:51:13.489 --> 00:51:16.369 remember there's always hope through Him because 00:51:16.369 --> 00:51:19.110 you have been redeemed through His blood. Thanks 00:51:19.110 --> 00:51:21.389 for being with us everybody and until next time 00:51:21.389 --> 00:51:21.969 be well.