WEBVTT 00:00:16.219 --> 00:00:18.620 Hey there everybody, welcome out to another episode 00:00:18.620 --> 00:00:20.960 of Redeemed Through His Blood, Scott Durfey here 00:00:20.960 --> 00:00:24.960 as always joined by the lovely Debra Durfey. 00:00:25.179 --> 00:00:27.390 Why are you laughing? Just because the way you 00:00:27.390 --> 00:00:29.329 look at me and you say that I just want to say 00:00:29.329 --> 00:00:32.329 hello friends. Hi everyone She's laughing because 00:00:32.329 --> 00:00:34.609 it took me like five tries to get that right 00:00:34.609 --> 00:00:36.869 tonight I hope that's not a sign babe of things 00:00:36.869 --> 00:00:39.850 to come tonight. So hey, we're just sinners helping 00:00:39.850 --> 00:00:43.890 the sinners And we have the the magic of edit 00:00:43.890 --> 00:00:46.509 So hopefully we won't have to do too much of 00:00:46.509 --> 00:00:49.229 that tonight, but hey, I'm not gonna be surprised. 00:00:49.229 --> 00:00:53.350 We're off to a good start Something like that. 00:00:53.350 --> 00:00:57.009 Well Here we are. It's been what, 10 days or 00:00:57.009 --> 00:01:00.289 so since the podcast has been released. We're 00:01:00.289 --> 00:01:02.189 going to try and get in a little better rhythm 00:01:02.189 --> 00:01:08.409 than that. Check one, two, we're going to try 00:01:08.409 --> 00:01:10.890 and get in a little better rhythm or more frequent 00:01:10.890 --> 00:01:13.569 rhythm, probably with school starting here in 00:01:13.569 --> 00:01:17.030 the US and and maybe other places across the 00:01:17.030 --> 00:01:20.400 world as well. But. For now, it's been about 00:01:20.400 --> 00:01:24.200 a ten day between each episode pace. We'll probably 00:01:24.200 --> 00:01:27.939 try and close out to about seven Days between 00:01:27.939 --> 00:01:30.780 episodes. The truth is we're just not that organized 00:01:30.780 --> 00:01:34.700 Let's just get honest Why you got to do that? 00:01:35.200 --> 00:01:37.579 I'm just going to puke some truth here. Yeah, 00:01:37.579 --> 00:01:40.379 that's about right. We don't need excuses. Well, 00:01:40.379 --> 00:01:43.480 we're not that organized. I guess we got some 00:01:43.480 --> 00:01:45.200 good news though, didn't we? The other night 00:01:45.200 --> 00:01:48.140 we ran into a friend, an old friend who's been 00:01:48.140 --> 00:01:51.939 on the podcast. Yeah. And you'll remember, in 00:01:51.939 --> 00:01:55.159 fact, I'll probably publish his episode here 00:01:55.159 --> 00:01:57.819 in another week or so. Might go, maybe I'll do 00:01:57.819 --> 00:02:00.519 it between episodes or maybe I'll be lazy and 00:02:00.519 --> 00:02:03.359 do it in lieu of one that we would otherwise 00:02:03.359 --> 00:02:07.359 record. But our good friend Nick, he was on a 00:02:07.359 --> 00:02:10.719 couple years ago. I think he's a recovering addict, 00:02:10.879 --> 00:02:14.740 alcoholic, phenomenal story, just an amazing 00:02:14.740 --> 00:02:17.360 story. Great guy too. Yeah, a young man that 00:02:17.360 --> 00:02:20.060 I have an opportunity to be really close to in 00:02:20.060 --> 00:02:25.050 the groups of recovery and various things. Anyway, 00:02:25.050 --> 00:02:28.330 he'll be on surprise episode. He's got some great 00:02:28.330 --> 00:02:30.409 news some great wonderful things have happened 00:02:30.409 --> 00:02:33.129 in his life I'm not gonna divulge what those 00:02:33.129 --> 00:02:38.430 are. We'll let those all come to be when we have 00:02:38.430 --> 00:02:41.250 him on here But we're gonna I'm super excited 00:02:41.250 --> 00:02:43.949 about that. Yeah, and it was so great to see 00:02:43.949 --> 00:02:46.490 him. He's doing so great Yeah, I have the opportunity 00:02:46.490 --> 00:02:48.789 to talk to him every week I don't get to see 00:02:48.789 --> 00:02:51.629 him like you do, but it was so good to see him. 00:02:51.629 --> 00:02:55.509 Just such a great guy people, fellow friends, 00:02:55.789 --> 00:02:57.650 helping fellow friends. It's just good when you 00:02:57.650 --> 00:03:01.189 see somebody that's, you know, doing their best 00:03:01.189 --> 00:03:04.210 and they lift you. They make you want to be better. 00:03:05.210 --> 00:03:07.569 We've had so many examples of that in our lives 00:03:07.569 --> 00:03:12.490 lately. Right. We had a young lady that her parents 00:03:12.490 --> 00:03:16.750 are in Armenia. She was my young woman. I remember 00:03:16.750 --> 00:03:18.849 when she was a little beehive. We went to girls 00:03:18.849 --> 00:03:22.050 camp. Her mother served as the Relief Society 00:03:22.050 --> 00:03:24.169 president when I was the elders corn president. 00:03:24.169 --> 00:03:27.150 Great family. Her dad and I are very close friends 00:03:27.150 --> 00:03:29.840 and they've been in Armenia. We're at their home 00:03:29.840 --> 00:03:33.240 country serving a mission Her parents are her 00:03:33.240 --> 00:03:35.740 parents and her brother actually also so she 00:03:35.740 --> 00:03:38.319 called up said hey It's time to go back to school. 00:03:38.319 --> 00:03:42.120 I need a father's blessing, and I was very honored 00:03:42.120 --> 00:03:45.319 to stand in proxy for my good friend Arthur and 00:03:45.319 --> 00:03:48.439 do that. Pretty tender, pretty tender little 00:03:48.439 --> 00:03:51.419 experience. You know, those instruments of grace. 00:03:51.960 --> 00:03:55.699 It's just so cool, babe, to have that in our 00:03:55.699 --> 00:03:58.960 lives. Yeah, went to a lovely farewell yesterday. 00:03:59.199 --> 00:04:02.780 Nephew Corbin. Yeah. Such a great, great kid 00:04:02.780 --> 00:04:06.340 and so ready to go out and serve out in Mexico. 00:04:06.419 --> 00:04:08.819 He's just. We have we're just surrounded with 00:04:08.819 --> 00:04:12.840 great people. Well, we are also at the point 00:04:12.840 --> 00:04:16.699 where we're between semesters. Oh, yeah. Institute. 00:04:16.959 --> 00:04:20.980 Yeah. How do you feel about that? Honestly, be 00:04:20.980 --> 00:04:25.319 honest. Oh, I'm actually relieved. I am not the 00:04:25.319 --> 00:04:29.259 I am not the go fight winner on the Let's Go 00:04:29.259 --> 00:04:33.300 Teach Institute. Hooray. I am the. Drag behind 00:04:33.300 --> 00:04:36.519 Scott. Yeah, well, that's not true. I love it 00:04:36.519 --> 00:04:38.819 when I'm there. I do love it when I'm there, 00:04:39.000 --> 00:04:41.819 but getting there sometimes after working a long 00:04:41.819 --> 00:04:45.480 day at work and I come home and I'm like, oh. 00:04:45.540 --> 00:04:48.600 Yeah, our work situations are a little bit. Sometimes 00:04:48.600 --> 00:04:51.939 are just a little overwhelming. Different. I'm 00:04:51.939 --> 00:04:53.480 on the truth meter today. You're going to get. 00:04:53.769 --> 00:04:56.170 So, speaking of the truth, we kind of wrapped 00:04:56.170 --> 00:04:59.790 up last week all of the effects, the conditional 00:04:59.790 --> 00:05:02.129 effects, and we did the unconditional effects. 00:05:02.149 --> 00:05:05.930 And I know that there's more. But, Deb, I'm ready 00:05:05.930 --> 00:05:08.649 to move past that. I'm ready to move into past 00:05:08.649 --> 00:05:11.610 some of that deeper doctrine. And one of the 00:05:11.610 --> 00:05:14.649 things that has really been on my mind heavy 00:05:14.649 --> 00:05:18.509 for the last few days, I'm in a process of repentance. 00:05:19.649 --> 00:05:23.750 I have had an awakening. You know, one of the 00:05:23.750 --> 00:05:26.509 things that we do in Alcoholics Anonymous or 00:05:26.509 --> 00:05:30.110 in the Rooms of Recovery is we take personal 00:05:30.110 --> 00:05:34.189 inventory. And I've been pretty good at that 00:05:34.189 --> 00:05:37.329 over the years. In fact, if you'll go back several, 00:05:37.329 --> 00:05:39.509 well, a couple of years ago, probably on several 00:05:39.509 --> 00:05:41.629 episodes, David and I would actually talk about 00:05:41.629 --> 00:05:44.350 that. And I'd kind of let it slip a little bit. 00:05:44.470 --> 00:05:46.750 I haven't been. taking my personal inventory 00:05:46.750 --> 00:05:50.230 been kind of honestly as we say in the rooms 00:05:50.230 --> 00:05:53.829 of recovery kind of resting on my laurels spiritually 00:05:53.829 --> 00:05:57.879 and otherwise you know and When that happens 00:05:57.879 --> 00:06:00.980 to me, I kind of get off the beam, is what we 00:06:00.980 --> 00:06:03.579 call that. And I've been a little bit off the 00:06:03.579 --> 00:06:05.759 beam, so I'm in a bit of a process of repentance. 00:06:05.959 --> 00:06:07.300 I'm trying to get out of the way. I'm trying 00:06:07.300 --> 00:06:11.620 to move myself out of my own way and re -engage 00:06:11.620 --> 00:06:14.500 and really do the things that we talk about on 00:06:14.500 --> 00:06:17.639 here. You know, the thing that's really kind 00:06:17.639 --> 00:06:22.230 of difficult sometimes is... Come on here. We 00:06:22.230 --> 00:06:24.810 come on here We talk about these wonderful things 00:06:24.810 --> 00:06:27.949 and and it's true and I love them and but living 00:06:27.949 --> 00:06:30.269 them is sometimes different for me Yeah, knowing 00:06:30.269 --> 00:06:33.730 it's not enough. I know that yeah, I mean I know 00:06:33.730 --> 00:06:35.470 the right answers, but am I living the right 00:06:35.470 --> 00:06:38.129 answers? No, not always absolutely not. Yeah. 00:06:38.329 --> 00:06:41.149 Yeah, it's hard Yeah, it's really really hard. 00:06:41.410 --> 00:06:43.829 Yeah, so you know what? I'm grateful for today 00:06:43.829 --> 00:06:47.009 Second chances third daily repentance, maybe 00:06:47.579 --> 00:06:50.259 daily repentance. Finding the joy in daily repentance. 00:06:50.660 --> 00:06:53.579 Opportunity to turn to Him, right? Yeah, for 00:06:53.579 --> 00:06:56.620 sure. Yeah, finding joy in daily repentance. 00:06:58.350 --> 00:07:00.829 Anyway, so there you have it, you know, that's 00:07:00.829 --> 00:07:02.829 where I'm at. That's where I've been and I've 00:07:02.829 --> 00:07:06.129 been really reflecting yesterday specifically 00:07:06.129 --> 00:07:08.829 on the airplane coming home from Chicago after 00:07:08.829 --> 00:07:12.170 I'd heard Corbin's talk and I had had some, you 00:07:12.170 --> 00:07:14.610 know, prayerful experiences the night before 00:07:14.610 --> 00:07:17.069 in the hotel there and you know various things 00:07:17.069 --> 00:07:20.730 and as I'm coming home, I'm just I'm just so 00:07:20.730 --> 00:07:23.889 grateful. You know, we talked about in the past 00:07:23.889 --> 00:07:26.970 when sometimes we get in those spots and we recognize 00:07:26.970 --> 00:07:29.670 our fallenness and we rather than bow our heads 00:07:29.670 --> 00:07:32.430 in shame, you know, to bow our heads and just 00:07:32.430 --> 00:07:35.290 say thank you. Yeah. You know, thank you, Heavenly 00:07:35.290 --> 00:07:37.810 Father, for the gift of your son. Yeah. And that 00:07:37.810 --> 00:07:40.329 was a big adjustment for me, too. Yeah. Because 00:07:40.329 --> 00:07:43.750 I wasn't always thankful. I picked up the shame 00:07:43.750 --> 00:07:46.689 card or shame hat and put it on and wanted to 00:07:46.689 --> 00:07:50.379 hide. Hide. Yeah. Literally, it's like I don't 00:07:50.379 --> 00:07:52.000 want anybody to know what just happened or what 00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:54.920 I did or what I thought or what I whatever yeah 00:07:54.920 --> 00:07:58.939 Because yeah, I don't I definitely don't do this 00:07:58.939 --> 00:08:02.839 100 % I don't do it right. I Mean and again knowing 00:08:02.839 --> 00:08:06.660 is just not enough I mean, I love the feelings 00:08:06.660 --> 00:08:09.300 that we get when we get in a deep scripture, 00:08:09.300 --> 00:08:13.180 you know study and meditation and I love how 00:08:13.180 --> 00:08:16.339 I feel but to take that into the real world for 00:08:16.339 --> 00:08:20.129 me and to apply it I'm coming to me and every 00:08:20.129 --> 00:08:23.850 thought doubt not fear not is Impossible for 00:08:23.850 --> 00:08:25.750 me. I will tell you that because I put effort 00:08:25.750 --> 00:08:29.910 into it. Yeah, I can't do it It's it's I'm trying 00:08:29.910 --> 00:08:34.669 I am trying But I I will tell you it is very 00:08:34.669 --> 00:08:38.090 very difficult when life gets in the way when 00:08:38.090 --> 00:08:41.549 you know I'm at work or if I have other distractions 00:08:41.549 --> 00:08:46.649 people driving. I mean, I just I easily get derailed 00:08:46.649 --> 00:08:49.509 and I think of Martha Martha you're encumbered 00:08:49.509 --> 00:08:52.210 about and Deborah Deborah I am encumbered about 00:08:52.210 --> 00:08:56.850 For sure. Well, you know Sometimes this stuff 00:08:56.850 --> 00:08:59.649 in life those real we can't trivialize it true, 00:08:59.950 --> 00:09:02.169 you know, I mean there's some real stuff I mean 00:09:02.169 --> 00:09:05.490 real stuff that you and I and some of our listeners 00:09:05.490 --> 00:09:07.970 go through and you know, they can have to do 00:09:07.970 --> 00:09:11.019 with families and they can have to do with You 00:09:11.019 --> 00:09:14.379 know, choices that family are making that, you 00:09:14.379 --> 00:09:17.159 know, you see and you know, the kind of consequences 00:09:17.159 --> 00:09:20.600 and the kind of cause and effect that come from 00:09:20.600 --> 00:09:23.879 choices and decisions and decisions that have 00:09:23.879 --> 00:09:27.519 been made in the past that are now bearing the 00:09:27.519 --> 00:09:32.899 fruit of consequence. Yeah. Oh, my word. I bow 00:09:32.899 --> 00:09:35.539 my head and say thank you. Thank you for the 00:09:35.539 --> 00:09:38.740 for the atonement of your son, because, oh, I 00:09:38.740 --> 00:09:41.340 just don't know how we could do it. Yeah, I've 00:09:41.340 --> 00:09:43.919 tried. I mean, you know overwhelming it truly 00:09:43.919 --> 00:09:47.860 is overwhelming right like when you when Because 00:09:47.860 --> 00:09:50.519 I've shared before you know, I like to control 00:09:50.519 --> 00:09:52.960 things and I still like to control things Yeah, 00:09:53.200 --> 00:09:55.779 and there are times that I just I have to like 00:09:55.779 --> 00:09:59.080 lift my hands up and in a surrender mode and 00:09:59.080 --> 00:10:02.220 just go not my will but then there's there's 00:10:02.220 --> 00:10:07.820 days I get overwhelmed and frustrated and It's 00:10:07.820 --> 00:10:09.740 it's well to remember what I'm supposed to do 00:10:09.740 --> 00:10:12.019 but not easy to remember to do it It's not easy 00:10:12.019 --> 00:10:14.440 to do it to do it. It's hard to be in the world 00:10:14.440 --> 00:10:17.659 and not of the world I had a great experience 00:10:17.659 --> 00:10:20.259 so in Chicago, you know working there and it's 00:10:20.259 --> 00:10:22.879 so many great people I love what I do for my 00:10:22.879 --> 00:10:25.919 career and all that but you know what Deb New 00:10:25.919 --> 00:10:29.590 York last week Chicago this week. I'm tired Yes, 00:10:29.590 --> 00:10:32.269 you are. I'm tired. I get beat down and when 00:10:32.269 --> 00:10:33.950 I get beat down, and these are some of the things 00:10:33.950 --> 00:10:35.529 that maybe we can talk about tonight. You know, 00:10:35.529 --> 00:10:37.350 when I get beat down, there's a couple of things 00:10:37.350 --> 00:10:40.049 that I need to be careful of. When I get beat 00:10:40.049 --> 00:10:42.809 down and when I feel hungry or when I feel angry 00:10:42.809 --> 00:10:45.950 or when I feel lonely or when I feel tired. It's 00:10:45.950 --> 00:10:50.129 the halt. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Halt. 00:10:50.629 --> 00:10:53.870 Stop. That's right. That's when I feel susceptible 00:10:53.870 --> 00:10:58.909 to the accuser, to the accusations of the accuser. 00:10:58.970 --> 00:11:02.009 Because I'm being accused, you know, I get it. 00:11:02.009 --> 00:11:04.809 I know that I can put for get better effort I 00:11:04.809 --> 00:11:08.710 know all of that but but here's the thing the 00:11:08.710 --> 00:11:12.070 the accuser wants me to believe that I'm really 00:11:12.070 --> 00:11:14.669 messed up that that's just and and eventually 00:11:14.669 --> 00:11:17.649 just throw in the towel what I'm super grateful 00:11:17.649 --> 00:11:20.850 for and and next week and maybe even a little 00:11:20.850 --> 00:11:23.840 bit this week as we start talking a little bit 00:11:23.840 --> 00:11:26.679 about faith. Maybe what I'm super grateful for 00:11:26.679 --> 00:11:31.399 is to know that it's really not my effort that 00:11:31.399 --> 00:11:34.080 counts. I mean, my effort accounts in terms of 00:11:34.080 --> 00:11:37.519 alignment with him, but it's not my effort that 00:11:37.519 --> 00:11:42.059 redeems me. That's the all you can do part. You 00:11:42.059 --> 00:11:45.639 just need to align. Yeah. Yeah. Repent. Yes. 00:11:45.940 --> 00:11:49.039 Yes. Repent. And by repent, I don't mean run 00:11:49.039 --> 00:11:51.440 to my bishop and say, Bishop, I'm having these 00:11:51.480 --> 00:11:53.899 thoughts of discouragement or whatever the whatever 00:11:53.899 --> 00:11:56.940 it is, you know, that's not I mean, that can 00:11:56.940 --> 00:12:00.200 be that can be a one of the manifestations of 00:12:00.200 --> 00:12:02.539 repentance. We'll get to all that later. I'm 00:12:02.539 --> 00:12:04.919 kind of going down a rabbit hole there with repentance. 00:12:05.179 --> 00:12:07.539 But repentance, if just let's just suffice it 00:12:07.539 --> 00:12:09.860 to say that when I use that word repentance, 00:12:09.919 --> 00:12:13.600 I'm really just talking about when he makes the 00:12:13.600 --> 00:12:16.840 invitation come unto me to respond to that invitation 00:12:16.840 --> 00:12:19.750 to come unto him. That's the comforting part 00:12:19.750 --> 00:12:23.830 is just to know that's it Just come unto me and 00:12:23.830 --> 00:12:26.669 that's for me the important part, you know Because 00:12:26.669 --> 00:12:30.269 if I have to earn my way back, I just not gonna 00:12:30.269 --> 00:12:33.750 do it There's just no possible way I can and 00:12:33.750 --> 00:12:36.570 and I've tried and I try to check all the boxes 00:12:36.570 --> 00:12:39.070 and I try to cross all the T's and dot all the 00:12:39.070 --> 00:12:46.039 eyes and invariably I am going to be human invariably 00:12:46.039 --> 00:12:51.840 I am going to succumb to the the Accusations 00:12:51.840 --> 00:12:54.779 and believe them sometimes it just happens for 00:12:54.779 --> 00:12:57.419 me. Yeah, and you know, I don't think I'm alone 00:12:57.419 --> 00:13:01.360 Do you feel that way? Absolutely. Yeah, and I 00:13:01.360 --> 00:13:04.600 I feel like it's one of those things that we 00:13:04.600 --> 00:13:07.940 feel like we earn You know, we will earn our 00:13:07.940 --> 00:13:10.759 way. I guess that's kind of my point. Yeah. Yeah, 00:13:11.000 --> 00:13:14.759 I love that quote from I can't even remember 00:13:14.759 --> 00:13:18.100 who it is. Adam Miller. Can I read that? Yeah. 00:13:18.200 --> 00:13:21.120 Have you got it there? Yeah. So yeah, this is 00:13:21.120 --> 00:13:23.600 a quote from Adam Miller. This quote comes from, 00:13:23.620 --> 00:13:25.539 I think it's from a letter to a young Mormon. 00:13:25.779 --> 00:13:27.960 Yeah. Something like, is that right? Yeah. OK. 00:13:28.879 --> 00:13:31.720 I love this. Yeah. I love this, too, because 00:13:31.720 --> 00:13:34.840 it gives me peace. And it makes it easier for 00:13:34.840 --> 00:13:37.220 me to bow my head and say thank you. Keeping 00:13:37.220 --> 00:13:41.389 the law doesn't earn you heavenly merits. breaking 00:13:41.389 --> 00:13:44.909 the law doesn't earn you hellish merits. Both 00:13:44.909 --> 00:13:49.429 merits and demerits are about you. The purpose 00:13:49.429 --> 00:13:53.070 of the gospel is to point you away from yourself 00:13:53.580 --> 00:13:57.220 Free you from the self -obsessed burden of your 00:13:57.220 --> 00:14:01.559 own story and center you on Christ. You don't 00:14:01.559 --> 00:14:04.320 need to generate merit in order to be saved. 00:14:05.039 --> 00:14:08.799 You need instead to come unto Christ and rely 00:14:08.799 --> 00:14:13.639 wholly upon the merits of Him who is mighty to 00:14:13.639 --> 00:14:17.559 save. There's a scripture in 2 Nephi 31 19 that 00:14:17.559 --> 00:14:20.129 talks about that. and we can read it when I'm 00:14:20.129 --> 00:14:24.710 done with this quote. The gospel points holy 00:14:24.710 --> 00:14:29.690 to Christ and His grace. Keeping the law of the 00:14:29.690 --> 00:14:32.990 gospel is the work of relying on Christ's merit, 00:14:33.409 --> 00:14:36.769 not the work of generating your own. This is 00:14:36.769 --> 00:14:41.129 still hard work, but it is work of an entirely 00:14:41.129 --> 00:14:46.230 different kind. Keeping the law of the gospel 00:14:46.810 --> 00:14:50.549 is the work of relying on Christ's merit, not 00:14:50.549 --> 00:14:54.049 the work of generating my own. Yeah. Because 00:14:54.049 --> 00:14:57.029 we think it's like the choice and consequence 00:14:57.029 --> 00:14:59.470 thing. It's like if I do a good thing, then I 00:14:59.470 --> 00:15:01.169 get a good consequence. If I do a bad thing, 00:15:01.190 --> 00:15:05.429 I get a bad consequence. As carnal and humans, 00:15:06.230 --> 00:15:08.950 we believe that that's the way that we earn our 00:15:08.950 --> 00:15:12.779 way back. We don't earn it also there the scripture 00:15:12.779 --> 00:15:16.559 in the middle of that was second Nephi 31 19 00:15:16.559 --> 00:15:19.500 and I just want to read that really quick just 00:15:19.500 --> 00:15:22.820 because I feel like it applies and Now my beloved 00:15:22.820 --> 00:15:26.019 brethren after ye have gotten into this straight 00:15:26.019 --> 00:15:30.820 and narrow path I would ask if all is done Behold 00:15:30.820 --> 00:15:36.159 I say unto you nay for Ye have not come thus 00:15:36.159 --> 00:15:39.559 far to save it were by the word of Christ with 00:15:39.559 --> 00:15:43.259 unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the 00:15:43.259 --> 00:15:47.379 merits of him who is mighty to save. I love that. 00:15:48.340 --> 00:15:52.600 I love that scripture. You know, there's so many, 00:15:52.860 --> 00:15:57.879 though, in second Nephi that talk about Christ's 00:15:57.879 --> 00:16:00.970 merits. Is that your favorite one, the one you 00:16:00.970 --> 00:16:03.370 just read? That's the one that was quoted with 00:16:03.370 --> 00:16:08.549 this quote. Do I have a favorite? To be honest, 00:16:08.830 --> 00:16:12.750 no. I don't know enough to have a favorite. I 00:16:12.750 --> 00:16:15.429 love that scripture, Deb. I love this scripture 00:16:15.429 --> 00:16:20.200 too. This is Lehi speaking to his son Jacob, 00:16:20.299 --> 00:16:22.059 and I'm not gonna read the whole thing, but he's 00:16:22.059 --> 00:16:25.580 talking to Jacob and about how he needs to be 00:16:25.580 --> 00:16:28.860 with his brother Nephi, and he says, wherefore 00:16:28.860 --> 00:16:31.279 thyself shall be blessed, and thou shalt dwell 00:16:31.279 --> 00:16:34.879 safely with thy brother Nephi. And thy days shall 00:16:34.879 --> 00:16:38.200 be spent in the service of thy God. Here it is. 00:16:38.580 --> 00:16:42.320 Wherefore, I know thou art redeemed because of 00:16:42.320 --> 00:16:45.320 the righteousness of thy Redeemer. And end four. 00:16:45.710 --> 00:16:50.110 and thou has beheld in thy youth his glory wherefore 00:16:50.110 --> 00:16:53.090 thou art blessed even as they unto whom he shall 00:16:53.090 --> 00:16:56.269 minister in the flesh for the spirit is the same 00:16:56.269 --> 00:16:59.769 yesterday and today and forever this is also 00:16:59.769 --> 00:17:05.190 it and the way is prepared from the fall of man 00:17:05.190 --> 00:17:09.910 and salvation is free what does that even mean 00:17:09.910 --> 00:17:13.109 salvation is free how does that align with what 00:17:13.109 --> 00:17:16.690 i've been taught yeah I know it gets confusing 00:17:16.690 --> 00:17:20.450 for sure well until we dig deeper into the doctrine 00:17:20.450 --> 00:17:23.650 right right it's not that the doctrine the truth 00:17:23.650 --> 00:17:27.690 I think I think as a young child and you learn 00:17:27.690 --> 00:17:30.250 things in primary and young you know in youth 00:17:30.250 --> 00:17:33.009 programs and stuff you sure you interpret the 00:17:33.009 --> 00:17:35.210 best way you know how yeah and then it becomes 00:17:35.210 --> 00:17:39.690 a belief yeah and then it becomes like This is 00:17:39.690 --> 00:17:42.710 the truth and and I would argue it to the bitter 00:17:42.710 --> 00:17:46.650 end and so when I had to unlearn Some of my truths 00:17:46.650 --> 00:17:50.630 that I learned incorrectly like what like? Thinking 00:17:50.630 --> 00:17:52.410 that I was gonna earn my way to heaven. I mean, 00:17:52.430 --> 00:17:55.309 there's even a song about There there's angels 00:17:55.309 --> 00:17:57.109 marking the good things and the bad things that 00:17:57.109 --> 00:18:00.410 we say I mean that to me is like there's a there's 00:18:00.410 --> 00:18:03.819 a Cop up there that or somebody, you know angels 00:18:03.819 --> 00:18:06.380 are taking record and they're they know what 00:18:06.380 --> 00:18:08.400 all the good and all the bad that I'm doing and 00:18:08.400 --> 00:18:10.400 I'm gonna be judged for the good and the bad 00:18:10.400 --> 00:18:13.220 So I better out do the good and do more good 00:18:13.220 --> 00:18:16.180 than the bad That was literally my belief system 00:18:16.180 --> 00:18:18.779 and I truly believe that that's the way I was 00:18:18.779 --> 00:18:21.900 gonna be judged in the last days That I was going 00:18:21.900 --> 00:18:23.700 to stand before him and every one of my thoughts 00:18:23.700 --> 00:18:26.279 were going to be exposed to the world and all 00:18:26.279 --> 00:18:29.099 of my bad doings that I didn't repent correctly 00:18:29.099 --> 00:18:33.160 of. That was my belief. That was truly my whole 00:18:33.160 --> 00:18:36.220 belief system. And I remember as a child thinking, 00:18:36.980 --> 00:18:39.720 Oh gosh, I hope, you know, I can, I can repent 00:18:39.720 --> 00:18:42.579 of that. Whatever I just said or did or whatever, 00:18:42.960 --> 00:18:45.200 just because I knew that I had to earn my way 00:18:45.200 --> 00:18:49.309 back to heaven or back to heavenly father. Boy, 00:18:49.309 --> 00:18:51.769 I'm glad I unlearned that I mean it was if that 00:18:51.769 --> 00:18:54.069 stresses me out talking about it Yeah, it's stressing 00:18:54.069 --> 00:18:56.390 me out hearing you talk about it because I had 00:18:56.390 --> 00:18:59.920 the same belief system And I don't know that 00:18:59.920 --> 00:19:02.519 I was, I don't want anybody who's listening, 00:19:02.640 --> 00:19:05.579 mom and dad or anybody else to feel like there's 00:19:05.579 --> 00:19:08.660 any blame here because it's not. But but I think 00:19:08.660 --> 00:19:11.059 this was kind of and maybe kind of still is a 00:19:11.059 --> 00:19:13.460 cultural thing. And I know that our our religion 00:19:13.460 --> 00:19:16.319 is does not have the corner on this. I have very 00:19:16.319 --> 00:19:18.680 close friends who are evangelicals and a very 00:19:18.680 --> 00:19:21.420 close friend who's a Lutheran and very close 00:19:21.420 --> 00:19:23.819 friends. I belong to this group at work. And 00:19:23.819 --> 00:19:26.519 I'm literally the this Christian group at work. 00:19:26.519 --> 00:19:29.089 And I'm literally the only. the S guy and Deb 00:19:29.089 --> 00:19:31.450 I'm telling you we're not the only ones that 00:19:31.450 --> 00:19:33.930 struggle with this and I think anybody who's 00:19:33.930 --> 00:19:38.670 trying to align their lives with Jesus Has had 00:19:38.670 --> 00:19:42.230 this experience wherein we have felt condemned 00:19:42.230 --> 00:19:46.130 condemned by our actions condemned by just everything, 00:19:46.130 --> 00:19:48.630 you know everything that our thoughts are and 00:19:48.630 --> 00:19:51.650 actions and and I don't want to be irreverent 00:19:51.650 --> 00:19:53.950 or flippant here because you know, We do have 00:19:53.950 --> 00:19:57.109 onus, you know, we are responsible for the things 00:19:57.109 --> 00:20:00.049 we say we are responsible for the actions that 00:20:00.049 --> 00:20:05.579 we take however We can't earn our way there Right, 00:20:05.700 --> 00:20:08.119 no matter how good we are and how well we pay 00:20:08.119 --> 00:20:10.660 tithing and say our prayers and read our scriptures 00:20:10.660 --> 00:20:13.859 and serve in all the church every, or whatever. 00:20:14.240 --> 00:20:17.160 And all the good deeds, yes. But that's literally 00:20:17.160 --> 00:20:20.480 what I believed. I know, me too. Pay more tithing 00:20:20.480 --> 00:20:23.420 to make it up. Well, and the thing is, exactly 00:20:23.420 --> 00:20:26.500 right. Really? I'm not kidding. As silly as that 00:20:26.500 --> 00:20:28.819 sounds, that was my belief. You paid extra tithing? 00:20:28.980 --> 00:20:32.319 I have before, yes. I just wanted extra blessings. 00:20:32.400 --> 00:20:36.170 There you go. How absurd is that? Well, I'm not 00:20:36.170 --> 00:20:38.950 going to call that absurd, but I'm not going 00:20:38.950 --> 00:20:42.329 to judge that. I mean, whatever. The thing about 00:20:42.329 --> 00:20:44.809 that was my belief. The thing about this. You're 00:20:44.809 --> 00:20:47.849 laughing at me. I'm not. I'm laughing. I'm laughing 00:20:47.849 --> 00:20:50.329 at all of us. I'm laughing at the entire with 00:20:50.329 --> 00:20:53.329 me because I'm kind of human race, including 00:20:53.329 --> 00:20:57.609 myself, because we take ourselves far too seriously. 00:20:57.609 --> 00:21:00.529 We think we are far too far more powerful than 00:21:00.529 --> 00:21:03.529 we actually are. We can't redeem ourselves. We 00:21:03.529 --> 00:21:05.630 can't save ourselves. It's important that we 00:21:05.630 --> 00:21:08.049 align and I don't want to be misunderstood. Correct. 00:21:08.269 --> 00:21:10.509 I don't want to be. I don't want anybody to say, 00:21:10.650 --> 00:21:13.789 well, Brother Durfee or Scott or however you 00:21:13.789 --> 00:21:17.970 want to refer to me said that we don't have to 00:21:17.970 --> 00:21:21.329 do anything to get back to the presence of our 00:21:21.329 --> 00:21:24.089 Heavenly Father. That's not true. It's just a 00:21:24.089 --> 00:21:26.410 different work, right? Like Brother Miller, like 00:21:26.410 --> 00:21:29.009 Adam Miller said, it's just a different work. 00:21:29.150 --> 00:21:34.029 It's still work. But the gospel points us wholly 00:21:34.029 --> 00:21:37.569 to Christ and his grace. Keeping the law of the 00:21:37.569 --> 00:21:41.309 gospel is the work of relying on Christ's merit. 00:21:41.650 --> 00:21:44.750 Yeah, not our merits. Period. Exactly. Exclamation 00:21:44.750 --> 00:21:47.269 point. What does that work look like, relying 00:21:47.269 --> 00:21:49.809 on the merits of Christ for you and me? That 00:21:49.809 --> 00:21:53.369 means get out of the control panel, Deb. Okay, 00:21:53.529 --> 00:21:55.450 so what is what does that look like? Do you want 00:21:55.450 --> 00:21:59.210 so I well I have to have I have to literally 00:21:59.210 --> 00:22:02.650 have faith That he can make me whole I have to 00:22:02.650 --> 00:22:04.569 have faith that he can save me I have to have 00:22:04.569 --> 00:22:08.170 faith that he can forgive me for my my sins I 00:22:08.170 --> 00:22:11.849 have to have I have to align that my will and 00:22:11.849 --> 00:22:13.829 thy will I know I talk about this all the time, 00:22:13.829 --> 00:22:16.740 but it's that Obey my soul commune with thee 00:22:16.740 --> 00:22:20.160 I need to be led and guided and directed because 00:22:20.160 --> 00:22:23.380 my thinking some of my greatest thinking got 00:22:23.380 --> 00:22:26.839 me in some serious trouble and You're not alone. 00:22:27.180 --> 00:22:29.400 You're not the only person that's had that experience 00:22:29.400 --> 00:22:32.420 I have to many of our listeners have to I think 00:22:32.420 --> 00:22:37.119 to some degree all who Experience this mortal 00:22:37.119 --> 00:22:40.940 existence if we are honest with ourselves Have 00:22:40.940 --> 00:22:45.200 that same experience to some degree, right? You 00:22:45.200 --> 00:22:48.339 talked about having faith and how faith is kind 00:22:48.339 --> 00:22:51.400 of did you say it was key? Well, I just have 00:22:51.400 --> 00:22:54.500 to have faith that I There's a power greater 00:22:54.500 --> 00:22:57.400 than me that Heavenly Father can make things 00:22:57.400 --> 00:23:03.019 better that Jesus. Yeah is is going to save me 00:23:03.019 --> 00:23:07.200 from my Carnal state let me just share a really 00:23:07.200 --> 00:23:10.119 I know I've shared part of most of this story, 00:23:10.279 --> 00:23:14.630 but you know as a 17 year old girl that found 00:23:14.630 --> 00:23:20.289 myself pregnant. And I was in a place where there 00:23:20.289 --> 00:23:24.910 was not a human around me that could answer this 00:23:24.910 --> 00:23:29.049 question was I knew I wasn't capable of raising 00:23:29.049 --> 00:23:32.349 a child. I'm not a mom and a dad. I'm a teenager. 00:23:32.930 --> 00:23:36.789 And I need what, what I needed to do at that 00:23:36.789 --> 00:23:40.490 point in my life was find a mom and a dad that 00:23:40.490 --> 00:23:45.720 would love my blood child. the way I felt loved 00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:51.839 growing up. And I remember looking at every human 00:23:51.839 --> 00:23:55.039 in my world thinking, nobody knows this answer. 00:23:55.220 --> 00:23:58.279 There is not a human that walks this planet that 00:23:58.279 --> 00:24:02.660 knows my answer. And at 17 years old, I fell 00:24:02.660 --> 00:24:06.259 to my knees and I said, heavenly father, I have 00:24:06.259 --> 00:24:09.740 a big story and I don't, this is a human. This 00:24:09.740 --> 00:24:12.700 is a human being that needs a home. And I know 00:24:12.700 --> 00:24:15.240 I am not capable of raising this child the way 00:24:15.240 --> 00:24:17.420 that you would want this child to be raised. 00:24:18.299 --> 00:24:22.279 And I literally pleaded with him saying, lead 00:24:22.279 --> 00:24:26.720 me, guide me. And I knew, I knew at 17 years 00:24:26.720 --> 00:24:30.500 old that he knew the answer to that. And I trusted 00:24:30.500 --> 00:24:33.940 that somehow he would tell me and I would be 00:24:33.940 --> 00:24:38.859 led and guided by the inspiration and by his 00:24:38.859 --> 00:24:44.539 guidance. But it was a very, that was a very 00:24:44.539 --> 00:24:48.720 vulnerable place for me to be. And the simple 00:24:48.720 --> 00:24:51.660 fact is there was not a human that could answer 00:24:51.660 --> 00:24:57.140 this question or solve this problem or whatever. 00:24:58.059 --> 00:25:02.279 There just wasn't. And I knew that he knew. A 00:25:02.279 --> 00:25:04.359 lot of us have problems that we don't know how 00:25:04.359 --> 00:25:06.849 to solve. A lot of us. have problems that we 00:25:06.849 --> 00:25:09.769 don't know where to turn or where to go and maybe 00:25:09.769 --> 00:25:12.750 some of them feel as big as and are indeed as 00:25:12.750 --> 00:25:14.589 big as the one that you just described maybe 00:25:14.589 --> 00:25:17.190 some of them by comparison we would say well 00:25:17.190 --> 00:25:19.690 that's not as big a deal why I don't know that 00:25:19.690 --> 00:25:22.450 it would it requires me to handle it the same 00:25:22.450 --> 00:25:25.650 way that Deb handled that but what would you 00:25:25.650 --> 00:25:28.430 say to that first off how did you handle that 00:25:28.430 --> 00:25:33.609 how did you come to him you're 17 years old Yeah, 00:25:33.609 --> 00:25:37.369 you didn't just you know fold your arms bow your 00:25:37.369 --> 00:25:39.549 head and say a prayer and get an answer No, I 00:25:39.549 --> 00:25:45.650 didn't I I prayed fervently and often and I I 00:25:45.650 --> 00:25:49.250 just remember And and that was the first time 00:25:49.250 --> 00:25:51.930 I really that it was really impactful for me 00:25:51.930 --> 00:25:54.170 Because believe me that was not the first time 00:25:54.170 --> 00:25:56.890 I had to go vertical. I mean, okay What do you 00:25:56.890 --> 00:26:01.640 mean by go vertical it is? to seek Heavenly father 00:26:01.640 --> 00:26:05.359 for my answers. Okay, so you use Can you remember 00:26:05.359 --> 00:26:07.279 where you were at because I want to explore this 00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:10.960 go vertical thing? Yeah, okay when you say go 00:26:10.960 --> 00:26:13.880 vertical go vertical as opposed to horizontal 00:26:13.880 --> 00:26:16.980 which means Asking others asking people around 00:26:16.980 --> 00:26:19.359 me getting advice from people that maybe had 00:26:19.359 --> 00:26:21.559 gone through it and you know, I did seek that 00:26:21.559 --> 00:26:25.319 sure I did seek I mean, there were other young 00:26:25.319 --> 00:26:28.180 girls that were in a similar situation that I 00:26:28.180 --> 00:26:31.140 was asking, that I was observing, that I was 00:26:31.140 --> 00:26:34.000 seeing these girls have a baby and keep it. I 00:26:34.000 --> 00:26:35.640 was seeing these girls have a baby and place 00:26:35.640 --> 00:26:41.480 it for adoption. I observed. gathered as much 00:26:41.480 --> 00:26:43.720 information and then I would journal and I would 00:26:43.720 --> 00:26:47.539 pray and I I didn't really honestly at that point 00:26:47.539 --> 00:26:49.940 I did not read a ton of scriptures I'm sure I 00:26:49.940 --> 00:26:52.700 did but I don't remember diving into the scriptures 00:26:52.700 --> 00:26:55.700 was very hard for me to seek answer if I could 00:26:55.700 --> 00:26:58.839 get one scripture answers I would open up and 00:26:58.839 --> 00:27:02.269 kind of point and plead that there would be some 00:27:02.269 --> 00:27:04.390 kind of answer there for me because reading did 00:27:04.390 --> 00:27:06.829 not resonate with me at that time. Well, you 00:27:06.829 --> 00:27:08.890 were still struggling with that reading. For 00:27:08.890 --> 00:27:11.549 sure. As part of your learning disability at 00:27:11.549 --> 00:27:13.089 that point in your life. My reading comprehension 00:27:13.089 --> 00:27:16.549 was very, very, very low and they didn't have 00:27:16.549 --> 00:27:20.920 as easy accessible audible. As we do now. As 00:27:20.920 --> 00:27:24.059 we do now. We had no audible list. You could 00:27:24.059 --> 00:27:28.940 buy a cassette tape. Zig Ziggler or whatever. 00:27:29.359 --> 00:27:32.400 Yeah. But I mean, I think for me, it was just 00:27:32.400 --> 00:27:36.099 like, Heavenly Father, I know you have this answer 00:27:36.099 --> 00:27:40.279 and I know this child needs to be somewhere and 00:27:40.279 --> 00:27:44.140 not be raised by me or my family or whatever. 00:27:44.579 --> 00:27:48.930 And I think that it's It was that pivotal time 00:27:48.930 --> 00:27:54.730 for me that I learned how to be completely vulnerable 00:27:54.730 --> 00:27:58.529 to the point that it's like, I don't know. I 00:27:58.529 --> 00:28:01.970 really don't know. And as much as I was seeking, 00:28:02.150 --> 00:28:03.910 because there were days that it was like, no, 00:28:03.910 --> 00:28:05.750 I'm just gonna keep her. My family will help 00:28:05.750 --> 00:28:09.130 me raise her. And then I'm like, no, this isn't 00:28:09.130 --> 00:28:14.349 fair. I was raised with this amazing dad that 00:28:14.349 --> 00:28:19.279 loved me. And this little child deserves a dad 00:28:19.279 --> 00:28:27.700 that loves it was a her and I just it was clear 00:28:27.700 --> 00:28:36.039 to me in the end Where this child needed to go 00:28:36.039 --> 00:28:40.400 and You know, I I worked with a social worker 00:28:40.400 --> 00:28:43.319 that you know, they took they you know when I 00:28:43.319 --> 00:28:47.109 would make a decision it was family ABCDE And 00:28:47.109 --> 00:28:50.450 I just, I would read. their bio, what color hair 00:28:50.450 --> 00:28:53.210 they have, if they already had a child, what 00:28:53.210 --> 00:28:55.009 their interests, what their hobbies were. And 00:28:55.009 --> 00:28:56.269 there were certain things that were important 00:28:56.269 --> 00:28:58.690 to me. I was raised in a musical home. I wanted 00:28:58.690 --> 00:29:02.069 her to be raised in a musical home. I mean, I 00:29:02.069 --> 00:29:05.609 just had, I wanted her to have outdoor experiences. 00:29:05.690 --> 00:29:09.269 Like I did camping and living in the great outdoors. 00:29:09.849 --> 00:29:12.329 And, you know, so there were little things there, 00:29:12.329 --> 00:29:16.710 but ultimately it was again on my knees, pleading, 00:29:17.009 --> 00:29:19.309 lead me, guide me, walk me. beside me, help me 00:29:19.309 --> 00:29:24.289 find this way. Literally, literally. Where did 00:29:24.289 --> 00:29:28.950 that faith come from? I guarantee it was from 00:29:28.950 --> 00:29:33.730 my upbringing. This song, Love Is Spoken Here, 00:29:34.009 --> 00:29:39.130 is my upbringing. I see my mother kneeling. My 00:29:39.130 --> 00:29:45.029 father was a valiant priesthood holder. We had 00:29:45.029 --> 00:29:48.309 family night, family prayer. I just, I was raised 00:29:48.309 --> 00:29:52.829 in a really great home that taught me the importance 00:29:52.829 --> 00:29:57.430 of prayer. And obviously that instilled within 00:29:57.430 --> 00:29:59.849 you some faith. Yeah, when you get in a really 00:29:59.849 --> 00:30:02.369 rough spot, you go kind of back to your roots. 00:30:02.609 --> 00:30:07.390 You do. You really do. I, you know, when it's 00:30:07.390 --> 00:30:10.730 appropriate at some point, I have a similar experience 00:30:10.730 --> 00:30:15.799 and a night where I was actually snatched like 00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:19.640 it's talked about in Alma just literally snatched 00:30:19.640 --> 00:30:23.319 out of my situation out of my attitude out of 00:30:23.319 --> 00:30:25.779 my problem out of everything it was definitely 00:30:25.779 --> 00:30:29.319 the hand of God but but I've often asked myself 00:30:29.319 --> 00:30:31.299 that same question that's why I asked you because 00:30:31.299 --> 00:30:33.619 I don't know the answer you know where did that 00:30:33.619 --> 00:30:36.980 faith come from You know, I don't know where 00:30:36.980 --> 00:30:38.980 that faith for me came from. In fact, I don't 00:30:38.980 --> 00:30:41.759 know that I had that much faith in the beginning 00:30:41.759 --> 00:30:45.880 when I began to find better alignment so that 00:30:45.880 --> 00:30:48.000 I could have joy in my life, better alignment 00:30:48.000 --> 00:30:51.440 with Heavenly Father's will for me. I'm a true 00:30:51.440 --> 00:30:54.940 believer that all of us were born with the light 00:30:54.940 --> 00:30:56.779 of Christ. I really truly believe that. Yeah, 00:30:56.779 --> 00:31:00.220 that's doctrine for sure. And I feel like when 00:31:00.220 --> 00:31:04.130 we know truth, there's something that resonates 00:31:04.130 --> 00:31:11.349 in us. I watch children, all children, and they 00:31:11.349 --> 00:31:15.630 know right and wrong. They know truth. And I 00:31:15.630 --> 00:31:20.109 think as, I mean, we all chose him, Jesus Christ, 00:31:20.170 --> 00:31:23.170 we all chose him, and that's why we are all here. 00:31:23.190 --> 00:31:26.410 Chose him once. Yeah, we chose him once in the 00:31:26.410 --> 00:31:29.369 pre -existence. When there was a plan presented, 00:31:30.009 --> 00:31:33.019 we chose either Well, we chose Heavenly Father's 00:31:33.019 --> 00:31:36.440 plan or we chose Satan's plan. And I know that 00:31:36.440 --> 00:31:39.460 every human being that walks this planet chose 00:31:39.460 --> 00:31:42.880 him once. I know that. There is no doubt in my 00:31:42.880 --> 00:31:46.599 mind. And I feel like when that truth resonates 00:31:46.599 --> 00:31:53.539 and the spirit is penetrated, And we know that 00:31:53.539 --> 00:31:57.099 truth. I feel like every single human being that 00:31:57.099 --> 00:32:00.180 walks this planet has the ability to know truth. 00:32:00.480 --> 00:32:02.799 I mean, I, I shared this years ago. There was 00:32:02.799 --> 00:32:04.799 a little primary kid that I taught and I said, 00:32:04.839 --> 00:32:06.559 when you feel the spirit, what do you feel? And 00:32:06.559 --> 00:32:08.559 I remember her telling me, and this is a little 00:32:08.559 --> 00:32:11.019 kid, she goes, I get the hiccups. And, and I 00:32:11.019 --> 00:32:13.279 was like, Oh, that's cute. When you feel the 00:32:13.279 --> 00:32:14.779 spirit, you get hiccups. And I'm like, okay, 00:32:14.859 --> 00:32:16.839 what else? Oh, I have a warm feeling inside or 00:32:16.839 --> 00:32:18.920 I get cold chills or I get tears or whatever. 00:32:19.470 --> 00:32:21.490 about five years later, this young girl was up 00:32:21.490 --> 00:32:23.809 at the pulpit, burying her testimony. And got 00:32:23.809 --> 00:32:27.329 the hiccups. And I just wept. I was like, you 00:32:27.329 --> 00:32:30.529 recognize the spirit. At a very young age. How 00:32:30.529 --> 00:32:34.170 tender, how sweet. So however we feel it, it's 00:32:34.170 --> 00:32:37.150 not right or wrong. It just is. That's how we 00:32:37.150 --> 00:32:40.970 feel it. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not sure where it came 00:32:40.970 --> 00:32:45.170 from for me. I don't ever remember a time where 00:32:45.599 --> 00:32:49.039 It was just big and all of a sudden I knew that 00:32:49.039 --> 00:32:52.019 I had faith in Jesus I knew that I had faith 00:32:52.019 --> 00:32:55.240 in what he had done for me. I do remember though 00:32:55.240 --> 00:32:58.900 not believing it, you know bullet not not not 00:32:58.900 --> 00:33:02.119 believing the church but not believing that He 00:33:02.119 --> 00:33:04.799 did it all for me. I believe I remember growing 00:33:04.799 --> 00:33:09.650 up thinking I needed to do it for me And I man 00:33:09.650 --> 00:33:12.349 that was just a difficult spot to be in and sometimes 00:33:12.349 --> 00:33:14.450 I still because and I don't know if it's programming 00:33:14.450 --> 00:33:16.829 I don't know if it's DNA. I don't know what it 00:33:16.829 --> 00:33:19.890 is, but I know that sometimes When I've been 00:33:19.890 --> 00:33:21.630 feeling the way I've been feeling over the last 00:33:21.630 --> 00:33:24.849 week or so just a little bit off the beam You 00:33:24.849 --> 00:33:26.990 know off the beam or on the beam doesn't I'm 00:33:26.990 --> 00:33:29.210 off the beam. I've been feeling off the beam 00:33:29.210 --> 00:33:34.119 so to speak Something's amiss, you know, something's 00:33:34.119 --> 00:33:39.440 just not and and so often it's just me That has 00:33:39.440 --> 00:33:44.599 just kind of drifted away faith and it is difficult 00:33:44.599 --> 00:33:47.700 and and for a lot of people it's a new concept 00:33:47.700 --> 00:33:52.940 or a concept that has so much contextual and 00:33:52.940 --> 00:33:55.539 principle to it that is really kind of one that 00:33:55.539 --> 00:33:58.799 we don't really dive in too much or talk to very 00:33:58.799 --> 00:34:02.730 talk about very much, but In Alma 3221, it says, 00:34:02.730 --> 00:34:05.029 talking about faith, and now as I said, concerning 00:34:05.029 --> 00:34:07.849 faith. Faith is not to have the perfect knowledge 00:34:07.849 --> 00:34:09.929 of things, therefore if you have faith, you hope 00:34:09.929 --> 00:34:12.369 for things which are not seen which are true. 00:34:14.409 --> 00:34:18.190 And so according to that, according to what I 00:34:18.190 --> 00:34:23.730 just read, if I have faith, I hope for things 00:34:23.730 --> 00:34:26.449 which are not seen but they're true. I hope. 00:34:27.000 --> 00:34:29.940 for things that are not seeing, which are true. 00:34:30.099 --> 00:34:33.099 What does that mean? That means that when you're 00:34:33.099 --> 00:34:35.980 17 years old and you're struggling the way that 00:34:35.980 --> 00:34:38.260 you're struggling and you're in that kind of 00:34:38.260 --> 00:34:42.000 despair, you hope. You know, as much as desperate 00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:46.139 as I felt, I knew he knew. I knew he knew. There 00:34:46.139 --> 00:34:50.199 was not a question that I didn't wonder if he 00:34:50.199 --> 00:34:53.079 knew. I knew he knew. It was seeking that answer 00:34:53.079 --> 00:34:56.679 from him that I needed. to seek. So it wasn't, 00:34:56.940 --> 00:34:59.440 I mean, I was just hoping that I could hear that 00:34:59.440 --> 00:35:02.599 answer or be led to that answer or be guided 00:35:02.599 --> 00:35:06.000 to that answer. And let me hear you. Let me see 00:35:06.000 --> 00:35:10.820 how you speak to me. Let me hear and be led and 00:35:10.820 --> 00:35:12.619 guided. And, you know, when I feel the spirit, 00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:16.659 I have a warmth, massive warmth in my, in my 00:35:16.659 --> 00:35:20.079 heart. And I often will get chills and I often 00:35:20.079 --> 00:35:23.320 tear up and I'm like, Ooh, there's my truth meter. 00:35:23.639 --> 00:35:27.309 That's, that's true. And so I had to seek, I 00:35:27.309 --> 00:35:30.769 knew he knew, but I had to seek how to get that 00:35:30.769 --> 00:35:34.489 answer. So how does this tie in then to merits 00:35:34.489 --> 00:35:37.590 of Christ, not my merits, but his merits? And 00:35:37.590 --> 00:35:41.130 then how does that tie into faith then and being 00:35:41.130 --> 00:35:44.030 able to overcome the things that keep us from 00:35:44.030 --> 00:35:48.989 joy? Well, I think first off, the merits of Christ, 00:35:49.130 --> 00:35:52.289 I think I think for that situation, you know, 00:35:52.690 --> 00:35:57.550 seeing a 17 year old pregnant was not the ideal 00:35:57.550 --> 00:36:05.550 situation. And because I had gone through the 00:36:05.550 --> 00:36:10.989 repentance process and I knew that this wrong 00:36:10.989 --> 00:36:14.369 could be made right. I saw, I mean, I felt like 00:36:14.369 --> 00:36:17.630 I had done, I mean, being immoral was next to 00:36:17.630 --> 00:36:22.869 murder in my belief system. And I remember thinking, 00:36:23.079 --> 00:36:26.340 and I remember seeing people that adopted babies 00:36:26.340 --> 00:36:30.039 and I just thought we were able to make this 00:36:30.039 --> 00:36:33.699 thing that was so, so wrong, so, so right because 00:36:33.699 --> 00:36:37.699 of the merits of Jesus Christ. And I was so grateful 00:36:37.699 --> 00:36:41.599 that that terrible wrong could be made right. 00:36:43.119 --> 00:36:48.760 And I think to understand the faith, knowing 00:36:48.760 --> 00:36:52.900 I wasn't as worried about Making it right for 00:36:52.900 --> 00:36:56.440 me because I felt like I had I had the merits 00:36:56.440 --> 00:36:59.460 to pay You felt like you needed to be punished. 00:36:59.480 --> 00:37:03.000 I did I know I felt like I I was being punished 00:37:03.000 --> 00:37:06.960 and I I I felt like I needed to take my whoopens 00:37:06.960 --> 00:37:10.599 that's literally kind of how I what I truly believed 00:37:10.599 --> 00:37:13.659 and I think that's why I again got pregnant so 00:37:13.659 --> 00:37:16.119 soon after I placed that baby for adoption and 00:37:16.119 --> 00:37:20.179 had such a spiritual awakening and such a answering 00:37:20.179 --> 00:37:23.920 to prayers and so much faith. And I think that's 00:37:23.920 --> 00:37:28.400 why I, it was because I felt like this was all 00:37:28.400 --> 00:37:33.239 I deserved. And it was such a messed up belief 00:37:33.239 --> 00:37:39.059 system that my perception was that I, I, it was, 00:37:39.139 --> 00:37:41.719 that was a really big sin. Even though it's made 00:37:41.719 --> 00:37:46.360 right. I didn't allow him. That's where my faith 00:37:46.360 --> 00:37:51.530 was. Weak is I didn't have the faith that he 00:37:51.530 --> 00:37:53.750 I knew he was gonna make that situation, right? 00:37:53.750 --> 00:37:56.289 But I didn't have the faith that he was gonna 00:37:56.289 --> 00:38:01.510 make me right. Yeah at the end of of the fifth 00:38:01.510 --> 00:38:04.030 chapter or where we read in the fifth chapter 00:38:04.030 --> 00:38:05.949 of alcoholics anonymous Do you remember that 00:38:05.949 --> 00:38:10.309 that we believe that God could and would if he 00:38:10.309 --> 00:38:13.550 were sought, right? Yeah, I always believed he 00:38:13.550 --> 00:38:17.579 could I Just didn't know he would for me Yeah, 00:38:17.579 --> 00:38:20.320 and I think that's where I got tripped up. Right. 00:38:20.480 --> 00:38:23.000 Is because that was the ultimate sin. I mean, 00:38:23.119 --> 00:38:25.780 that was like, oh my gosh, no hiding it. No, 00:38:26.300 --> 00:38:28.719 even though we tried to hide it, it was just 00:38:28.719 --> 00:38:31.900 like, there was just no, I mean, I just felt 00:38:31.900 --> 00:38:35.500 like, you know. For sure. Yeah. I deserve it. 00:38:36.019 --> 00:38:38.019 For me, it really is all about that, you know, 00:38:38.079 --> 00:38:40.179 that God could and would if he were sod. I believe 00:38:40.179 --> 00:38:42.690 that he could. So I must have had some faith, 00:38:42.849 --> 00:38:47.449 faith in him. And I believe that he would for 00:38:47.449 --> 00:38:49.949 others, but I just never would believe that he 00:38:49.949 --> 00:38:53.349 would for me, Deb. And I think that's the case 00:38:53.349 --> 00:38:57.309 for me because I felt like that I had to pay 00:38:57.309 --> 00:39:00.630 it back. I had to earn it back. I had to rely 00:39:00.630 --> 00:39:05.230 on my own merit. And relying on my own merit 00:39:05.230 --> 00:39:11.400 really robs me of the experience of faith. Yeah. 00:39:11.400 --> 00:39:14.079 Yeah. Now that we talk about that, that's interesting 00:39:14.079 --> 00:39:17.900 to have that perception of, yeah, I had the faith 00:39:17.900 --> 00:39:20.099 that he could make that wrong right, but I didn't 00:39:20.099 --> 00:39:21.860 have the faith that he was going to make me right. 00:39:21.980 --> 00:39:24.820 Not for me. Yeah. I think that's where I got 00:39:24.820 --> 00:39:27.460 tripped up. And the reason I adopted that is 00:39:27.460 --> 00:39:30.460 because I knew better. because where much is 00:39:30.460 --> 00:39:33.639 given much is expected right right i was raised 00:39:33.639 --> 00:39:35.960 in the kind of not enough i was raised in the 00:39:35.960 --> 00:39:38.400 same type of family you were we did family night 00:39:38.400 --> 00:39:41.619 we read scriptures we did all of the same things 00:39:41.619 --> 00:39:46.000 and you know obviously We can do all that's right 00:39:46.000 --> 00:39:48.500 and not and our kids won't always turn out exactly 00:39:48.500 --> 00:39:51.500 the way we want them to dang kids have free agency 00:39:51.500 --> 00:39:54.860 No, that was a case for me and my parents much 00:39:54.860 --> 00:39:57.139 to their chagrin There's such wonderful people 00:39:57.139 --> 00:40:00.019 and have forgiven and all that today but but 00:40:00.019 --> 00:40:03.860 the point is is it's like I believed that I knew 00:40:03.860 --> 00:40:05.840 better and because I knew better I was being 00:40:05.840 --> 00:40:08.800 held to a higher standard the fall was less effective 00:40:08.800 --> 00:40:11.840 in my life for some mysterious reason and because 00:40:11.840 --> 00:40:16.300 of that I needed to pay for the stupid stuff 00:40:16.300 --> 00:40:19.780 I did. And I think that's where I got tripped 00:40:19.780 --> 00:40:22.840 up again. Really? Yeah. It's because I just felt 00:40:22.840 --> 00:40:26.500 like I had to pay. Yeah. Yeah. Those merits, 00:40:26.840 --> 00:40:29.920 that was a real belief for me, is that I had 00:40:29.920 --> 00:40:33.719 to earn my own. If I believe that it's my merits 00:40:33.719 --> 00:40:37.679 that count over his, it robs me of the experience 00:40:37.679 --> 00:40:41.110 of faith. Well, even the rate and repentance 00:40:41.110 --> 00:40:43.829 faith unto him and faith unto repent. There's 00:40:43.829 --> 00:40:46.230 no repentance without faith. No hundred percent 00:40:46.230 --> 00:40:49.349 There's no coming unto him without faith and 00:40:49.349 --> 00:40:51.590 you know, and there's so many levels though of 00:40:51.590 --> 00:40:54.550 faith You know so many yeah, it was right after 00:40:54.550 --> 00:40:56.389 that that I went got my patriarchal blessing 00:40:56.389 --> 00:41:00.710 right after I had that first baby and I I I just 00:41:00.710 --> 00:41:03.130 remember thinking I'm in alignment. I'm in alignment 00:41:03.130 --> 00:41:07.800 because I was doing the things that I thought 00:41:07.800 --> 00:41:11.039 I was supposed to do. What I was missing was 00:41:11.039 --> 00:41:16.460 that wholly relying on him still. Cause I was 00:41:16.460 --> 00:41:18.579 like, Hey, he got me through that. Now I got 00:41:18.579 --> 00:41:20.519 this. Yeah. But you know, cut yourself some slack 00:41:20.519 --> 00:41:22.840 there too, because you were learning how. True, 00:41:23.139 --> 00:41:25.320 and I think and I'm grateful I learned and I 00:41:25.320 --> 00:41:27.119 think that's for all of us I think that you know 00:41:27.119 --> 00:41:28.840 when it comes to this kind of stuff We really 00:41:28.840 --> 00:41:31.840 need to get be gentle with ourselves. Oh for 00:41:31.840 --> 00:41:35.219 sure We need to we really need to extend ourselves 00:41:35.219 --> 00:41:37.739 a lot of grace because it's really easy for me 00:41:37.739 --> 00:41:42.280 to sit here in this situation 26 almost 27 now 00:41:42.280 --> 00:41:45.039 years. Can you believe that almost? 27 years 00:41:45.039 --> 00:41:48.460 now sober and it's it's a lot different here 00:41:48.460 --> 00:41:52.699 today Deb than it was then yeah, and so I get 00:41:52.699 --> 00:41:55.159 it, and I know that we have listeners and I know 00:41:55.159 --> 00:41:57.340 that we have friends and loved ones and others 00:41:57.340 --> 00:42:00.239 that are out there that are just in different 00:42:00.239 --> 00:42:05.320 stages of this whole process, and there are so 00:42:05.320 --> 00:42:10.619 many levels of faith. We just begin to talk about 00:42:10.619 --> 00:42:13.340 just a little bit of faith, faith in Jesus, right, 00:42:13.340 --> 00:42:15.980 faith, and then faith in Jesus Christ. Anybody 00:42:15.980 --> 00:42:19.000 can have faith. Right, but it but it's really 00:42:19.000 --> 00:42:21.659 faith in Jesus Christ is when we start talking 00:42:21.659 --> 00:42:25.940 about the doctrine of Christ Faith in Jesus Christ 00:42:25.940 --> 00:42:28.360 faith in what in Jesus Christ faith in all that 00:42:28.360 --> 00:42:32.659 he did right faith in Alma chapter 7 faith in 00:42:32.659 --> 00:42:36.570 Alma 32 21 faith all of that We're getting to 00:42:36.570 --> 00:42:38.989 the point now where I think if we start taking 00:42:38.989 --> 00:42:43.329 on more on faith tonight that we won't be able 00:42:43.329 --> 00:42:46.730 to do it justice. And so we'll kind of move that 00:42:46.730 --> 00:42:50.630 discussion to next week. But for this week, maybe 00:42:50.630 --> 00:42:53.130 we can do our own personal inventory. I began 00:42:53.130 --> 00:42:55.269 the podcast tonight talking about a personal 00:42:55.269 --> 00:42:58.289 inventory that I've been doing. And maybe the 00:42:58.289 --> 00:43:00.429 rest of us can too, at least to a little bit 00:43:00.429 --> 00:43:02.369 degree. Just do a little personal inventory on 00:43:02.369 --> 00:43:05.489 where am I? Where am I? How much do I trust? 00:43:05.230 --> 00:43:09.150 how much faith do I have? Does the faith that 00:43:09.150 --> 00:43:11.869 I have have power in it? Does it motivate me? 00:43:11.889 --> 00:43:14.150 Does it drive me to repentance? Does it help 00:43:14.150 --> 00:43:17.449 me come closer to Him? And so, you know, maybe 00:43:17.449 --> 00:43:21.789 throughout this week as we prepare for the sacrament 00:43:21.789 --> 00:43:25.230 coming up Sunday, maybe we can just take that 00:43:25.230 --> 00:43:27.510 challenge on, babe. I just love again in that 00:43:27.510 --> 00:43:31.489 quote from Adam Miller about rely wholly upon 00:43:31.489 --> 00:43:35.000 the merits of Him. who is mighty to save. I think 00:43:35.000 --> 00:43:37.719 that's such a critical piece for me to remember 00:43:37.719 --> 00:43:42.340 because I rely there were oftentimes I rely partially 00:43:42.340 --> 00:43:47.539 on him and I but I was not relying wholly wholly 00:43:47.539 --> 00:43:51.900 on him that can he that he that can save. I can't 00:43:51.900 --> 00:43:55.699 wait to have Nick on again. I love his perspective 00:43:55.699 --> 00:43:58.340 on that right he thought that he could only get 00:43:58.340 --> 00:44:01.599 to him through certain through the church and 00:44:01.599 --> 00:44:03.900 through certain other things, you know, we don't 00:44:03.900 --> 00:44:07.139 have We don't have the corner on a relationship 00:44:07.139 --> 00:44:10.139 with him and anybody who can exercise faith in 00:44:10.139 --> 00:44:14.900 him can have Faith, I mean can have relief from 00:44:14.900 --> 00:44:19.400 the sins of the fallen world. We just can yeah 00:44:19.400 --> 00:44:23.449 and I think it's also great to to hear how people 00:44:23.449 --> 00:44:29.329 come to Christ in their own sweet ways, and I 00:44:29.329 --> 00:44:34.550 seek for that. I look for ways that people seek 00:44:34.550 --> 00:44:38.170 Him, and I'm interested in them sharing with 00:44:38.170 --> 00:44:42.670 me how they... Find him and whether it's through 00:44:42.670 --> 00:44:45.349 prayer whether it's I mean I go back to when 00:44:45.349 --> 00:44:48.449 we were in Israel and we were at the River Jordan 00:44:48.449 --> 00:44:52.329 and just watching all of those people in one 00:44:52.329 --> 00:44:56.050 way or another Just finding their way to Jesus 00:44:56.050 --> 00:44:59.190 describe that describe that there were hundreds 00:44:59.190 --> 00:45:02.650 and hundreds of people there. It's a it's a tourist 00:45:02.650 --> 00:45:06.719 site now and it's concrete and stairs and restrooms 00:45:06.719 --> 00:45:09.460 and there's tour guides everywhere and there's 00:45:09.460 --> 00:45:13.500 there are people there of all denominations. 00:45:13.679 --> 00:45:16.820 This is the traditional site. where Jesus was 00:45:16.820 --> 00:45:19.780 baptized by John the Baptist. The traditional 00:45:19.780 --> 00:45:21.920 site. We don't know for sure where that was, 00:45:21.980 --> 00:45:24.079 but this is the traditional site. But this is 00:45:24.079 --> 00:45:26.260 where all the tour buses go. And this is where 00:45:26.260 --> 00:45:30.380 everybody goes to say this is where Jesus Christ 00:45:30.380 --> 00:45:34.820 was baptized by John the Baptist. And as we approach, 00:45:35.099 --> 00:45:37.139 there are hundreds and hundreds and hundreds 00:45:37.139 --> 00:45:39.699 of people there. And some of them are in white 00:45:39.699 --> 00:45:42.159 robes and some of them are just in a pair of 00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:44.500 shorts and some of them. I mean, it just like 00:45:44.500 --> 00:45:47.119 tons. of people, some of them are in the water, 00:45:47.280 --> 00:45:49.519 dripping water on the head and there's preachers 00:45:49.519 --> 00:45:54.519 and pastors and all kinds of people ministering 00:45:54.519 --> 00:45:58.440 and helping baptize in any way they knew how. 00:45:58.440 --> 00:46:02.639 To come unto Him. To come unto Him. And I remember 00:46:02.639 --> 00:46:05.880 in the noise thinking, well, there is a lot going 00:46:05.880 --> 00:46:09.960 on here. And this was not the traditional way 00:46:09.960 --> 00:46:13.590 I knew Jesus to be baptized. And I thought, okay 00:46:13.590 --> 00:46:16.829 push pause Deb and I backed up and I went up 00:46:16.829 --> 00:46:20.690 the stairs and I looked down on this river and 00:46:20.690 --> 00:46:23.469 I watched all of the hundreds of people hundreds 00:46:23.469 --> 00:46:28.570 of people trying to touch that sacred water and 00:46:28.570 --> 00:46:33.150 to find Jesus somehow and I just I looked up 00:46:33.150 --> 00:46:35.829 to the sky and I just said oh heavenly father 00:46:35.829 --> 00:46:39.030 I bet this just makes your heart so warm that 00:46:39.030 --> 00:46:41.730 all of these hundreds and hundreds of people 00:46:42.090 --> 00:46:45.809 are following your son, Jesus Christ. They just 00:46:45.809 --> 00:46:51.070 want to be like you, like him, to get to Heavenly 00:46:51.070 --> 00:46:57.250 Father. I was so overwhelmed with that, that 00:46:57.250 --> 00:47:00.389 goodness that was among their, any way they found 00:47:00.389 --> 00:47:04.489 him, whatever it looked like, they were all trying 00:47:04.489 --> 00:47:08.329 to get to Jesus, period. They just were seeking 00:47:08.329 --> 00:47:12.820 him. The one needful thing. Yes. the one needful 00:47:12.820 --> 00:47:15.099 thing. We have a picture and I'll just end with 00:47:15.099 --> 00:47:17.820 this, but we have a picture in our living room 00:47:17.820 --> 00:47:20.079 from that very trip. I've talked about it on 00:47:20.079 --> 00:47:22.880 the podcast before, but this is the woman who 00:47:22.880 --> 00:47:26.199 had been what do you call it? Issue of blood. 00:47:26.199 --> 00:47:28.440 She had the issue of blood for 12 years. This 00:47:28.440 --> 00:47:30.300 is the woman who had had the issue of blood for 00:47:30.300 --> 00:47:33.320 12 years and through her faith reached through 00:47:33.320 --> 00:47:36.440 the crowd and just was able because of her faith 00:47:36.440 --> 00:47:40.150 to touch the hem of the Savior. and he felt a 00:47:40.150 --> 00:47:43.619 virtue. leave him. He felt that. He felt that 00:47:43.619 --> 00:47:47.119 healing take place. He even knew. Hadn't gone 00:47:47.119 --> 00:47:50.539 through the events, all of the events of the 00:47:50.539 --> 00:47:53.320 atonement yet, but of his atonement yet, but 00:47:53.320 --> 00:47:56.780 he had felt that and through her faith was able 00:47:56.780 --> 00:47:59.119 to be healed. You know, sometimes that's all 00:47:59.119 --> 00:48:02.579 it takes. It's just our ability to reach through 00:48:02.579 --> 00:48:05.599 the crowd, to reach through the busyness of our 00:48:05.599 --> 00:48:08.380 world, to reach through the confusion, through 00:48:08.380 --> 00:48:11.639 the hecticness, through All that's coming at 00:48:11.639 --> 00:48:15.440 us from every single direction and find even 00:48:15.440 --> 00:48:18.619 in the chaos the ability to reach through and 00:48:18.619 --> 00:48:22.199 just with our finger Touch the hem of him who 00:48:22.199 --> 00:48:29.119 hills. Yeah I'm grateful I'm grateful. I'm grateful 00:48:29.119 --> 00:48:32.500 that when I get off the beam I know how to get 00:48:32.500 --> 00:48:36.119 back on when I get I'm grateful that I Know that 00:48:36.119 --> 00:48:39.460 when I feel that my life has drifted a little 00:48:39.460 --> 00:48:42.599 bit that he's not wringing his hands He's not 00:48:42.599 --> 00:48:45.300 worried about me. He's not mad at me. He's just 00:48:45.300 --> 00:48:49.929 waiting for me to come back to say Welcome home, 00:48:50.210 --> 00:48:52.389 you know, here you are again, you know, and I'm 00:48:52.389 --> 00:48:54.389 not talking about major sin or I'm not talking 00:48:54.389 --> 00:48:57.730 I'm just talking about a spiritual Drift. Yeah 00:48:57.730 --> 00:49:01.849 a spiritual drift and and you know, I'm human 00:49:01.849 --> 00:49:07.820 and I hope it I hope that I just hope that I 00:49:07.820 --> 00:49:12.980 can always know that through the spirit of the 00:49:12.980 --> 00:49:15.320 Holy Ghost that all those things can be administered 00:49:15.320 --> 00:49:17.760 and that all the blessings of Christ's atonement 00:49:17.760 --> 00:49:19.739 can be administered into my life and I'm grateful 00:49:19.739 --> 00:49:23.059 for that today. I guess Deb as we kind of just 00:49:23.059 --> 00:49:25.639 wrap it up today just like always we want to 00:49:25.639 --> 00:49:28.119 say to you our listeners that wherever you are 00:49:28.409 --> 00:49:31.389 however you're feeling. You're welcome to be 00:49:31.389 --> 00:49:34.869 here with us. We hope that you find hope and 00:49:34.869 --> 00:49:37.329 healing as you do. Jesus isn't waiting for you 00:49:37.329 --> 00:49:41.550 to clean everything up, thank goodness. He's 00:49:41.550 --> 00:49:44.949 just waiting for us to come to Him. Yep, He meets 00:49:44.949 --> 00:49:47.329 us in the middle of our mess and our chaos and 00:49:47.329 --> 00:49:50.070 our crazy. Especially when we seek him that's 00:49:50.070 --> 00:49:52.389 where his grace shines the brightest so come 00:49:52.389 --> 00:49:55.610 as you are broken hopeful questioning Searching 00:49:55.610 --> 00:49:59.409 you truly are not alone and neither are we? So 00:49:59.409 --> 00:50:02.010 thanks for being here. Yeah, we'd also love to 00:50:02.010 --> 00:50:05.289 stay connected. We've made a little push on social 00:50:05.289 --> 00:50:09.309 media I'm the one doing it. So it's pretty I 00:50:09.309 --> 00:50:12.829 don't know not very great, but We're trying to 00:50:12.829 --> 00:50:14.949 do that. No big deal. If you if you don't want 00:50:14.949 --> 00:50:17.969 to like us find us share us. That's great But 00:50:17.969 --> 00:50:20.750 we really love your questions. We love your comments. 00:50:20.889 --> 00:50:23.949 We've had a couple of conversations going on 00:50:23.949 --> 00:50:27.650 via email currently and are really enjoying that 00:50:27.650 --> 00:50:31.190 opportunity stuff that we have been asked not 00:50:31.190 --> 00:50:34.989 to really talk about on the podcast. But if you 00:50:34.989 --> 00:50:37.369 have questions that you'd like us to, we'd be 00:50:37.369 --> 00:50:39.750 more than happy to address those here as well. 00:50:39.989 --> 00:50:42.710 And you can do that at he redeems us at gmail 00:50:42.710 --> 00:50:47.139 .com. And if this episode touched you or any 00:50:47.139 --> 00:50:49.280 other episode touched your heart, we hope that 00:50:49.280 --> 00:50:51.059 you share it with someone you love and care about, 00:50:51.139 --> 00:50:53.960 a friend, a family member, anyone who could use 00:50:53.960 --> 00:50:56.900 a little bit more hope and faith. Next week, 00:50:56.900 --> 00:50:59.380 we're going to continue our discussion on faith. 00:50:59.460 --> 00:51:01.400 We're going to learn about how the Savior doesn't 00:51:01.400 --> 00:51:04.599 just redeem us. He heals us. He lifts us. He 00:51:04.599 --> 00:51:07.820 transforms us. Thanks for being with us, everyone. 00:51:08.000 --> 00:51:11.000 And remember, there is always hope through Him. 00:51:11.769 --> 00:51:14.349 because you have been redeemed through His blood. 00:51:14.789 --> 00:51:18.090 We love you. God be with you. Until next time, 00:51:18.309 --> 00:51:18.670 be well.