Hello, my name is Leslie Kane and I am the host of the Why Not Today podcast.
This podcast is to celebrate people who have been courageous and said, why not today?
I started this podcast to honor my father, Patrick Kane, who often said, why not today?
I'm based in Rusty, Virginia, a Planned community right outside of Washington, DC.
Thanks for joining us today.
So I'm excited to have my guest today, Sarah White, and she is the first repeat guest on,
we interviewed her in the beginning and her story has completely changed.
And we had coffee the other day and she's just sharing about some things going on in
her life.
And I'm like, it's a podcast episode.
It's funny, I talked to somebody else yesterday that was on a podcast before and she's got
some twists and turns in her life.
It's like, oh, that's another podcast episode.
So I'm super excited to have Sarah here, who is we met virtually, pretty much the only
virtual networking event I went to.
And it was one of those divine.
I had to know Sarah, like she popped up in my Facebook feed that morning and jumped
on a Facebook or a virtual zoom and she was there.
And then a day or two later, my sister's like, you need to meet Sarah White.
I'm like, okay, I need to know this Sarah White person.
So I feel like even though it was a while before we physically got to see each other,
I feel like I'm blessed to have you as a good friend and business partner in the world out
there and just part of my tribe.
So Sarah, why don't you introduce yourself and share a fun fact about you?
I know you were on before, so share another fun fact maybe.
And then let's talk about your courage.
All right.
So Sarah White, like Leslie said, and I run five restaurants getting ready to open my
fifth restaurant and the first one that I will technically own coming up in the summer.
I am very excited about that.
That's a fun fact, right?
Is it part of the same brand or?
No, actually, it's going to be Westover Taco in Westover Arlington.
And we're super excited to get it off the ground.
It'll be the first of its type.
And that along with running those five restaurants and like you said, running for office before
having done a few things around here, I'm in 25 groups, including the Virginia Restaurant
Logic and Travel Association and seven different about to be eight different chambers.
I just love meeting people and use the word tribe, which is a big deal to me and surrounding
myself with all the right people.
And how are you going to meet them if you don't get out there?
They don't knock on your door.
I don't know.
It just doesn't happen.
So I always say I'm like waiting for somebody to knock on my door and I live in a secure
building.
It's like you got to get out there, which is so true.
And just like we met, I mean, you can meet people virtually or through social media and
never know who that person that you're supposed to meet.
So what's a fun fact about Sarah White?
Okay.
So aside from opening the restaurants, which you know, this is going to be our fifth restaurant
and the first one that I own, which I think is very exciting.
I think a fun fact, let's just say about my restaurant is that we're looking to do something
a different a little different.
I'm friends with some folks at the Asian American Hotel Association and they are teaching me
how to make chicken tikka from one of their five star chefs who is going to make my recipe
perfect so we can put in tacos.
Oh, fun.
All right.
So we need to plan a date.
I think we had this on the calendar at one point, but something happened.
We didn't make it happen.
Have you been to Mama Tigres yet?
I have not.
I'm still waiting to do that.
The last week in February.
Let's schedule something.
It is Mexican Indian fusion.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
Some so fun.
So the other cool kind of connecting fact that I think endeared me to you when I first
met you this year, email was something OBS and you went to the outer banks on vacation
and just stayed and I'm so connected to outer banks and lived didn't personally officially
live there, but was there so much everybody thought I lived there knew everything that
was going on.
So I've been there for seven years.
Lots of friends still go back to say hello.
Miss it a lot, but love Northern Virginia.
Yeah.
Well, I was actually talking to friends last night about a trip to outer banks in a couple
weeks because also in time.
So all right.
So what does courage means you as a definition change?
Do you still have the same one share with courage?
Which means you I have to say it and you already know this, but for everybody listening, I
went through some health challenges and I've had them my whole life, but this past year,
I actually had to have a surgery where they removed about 30% of my pancreas and I knew
going into it that it wasn't a sure bet.
I had been told for months that they wanted to wait till I was stronger, wonder wait till
it was healthier and it just wasn't happening.
And we knew we had to walk in anyway and do the surgery.
And so courage was getting up that day and walking in anyway and saying, let's just get
this done because it can't, it can't hinder my life any longer.
I have places and people and things to do.
Like I got to go.
This is not working for me to live in a hospital.
I was in the hospital for most of 15 months and just walking in anyway and high five in
my surgeon and saying, let's do this.
Yeah, that's awesome.
Well, and you came back on the other side.
So let's talk about the courageous things in your tribe and how you've just gotten so
connected.
So you haven't been in Northern Virginia that long compared to my world in Northern Virginia.
How long have you been in Northern Virginia?
So it's coming up on seven years.
Seven years.
Okay.
So, you know, you and I met, we talked about through networking, became friends.
And I remember it was probably November of 2021.
You reached out on Facebook and you built a great tribe on Facebook and you reached out
on Facebook and said, I'm in the hospital and you just were, you were sad.
You were lonely.
You needed connection.
And I remember seeing that post.
And although I know you knew you, I didn't know you that well.
And I was, it was not an inconvenient time for my world, but I'm like, you know what?
She's reaching out.
When people reach out, you need to react to that.
So I went, I remember meeting with you and we walked up and down the hall and not to
focus on your pain to distract you.
You're like, talk to me.
And we just start talking.
And honestly, you were one of the people that really encouraged me to go forward with this
podcast from that conversation of you in the hospital.
But it was such a fun conversation to have.
And it was a distraction and, and you are part of my tribe.
I think from day one, we knew that was just going to be a thing.
Yeah.
So you're showing up for me when I needed somebody, when I needed someone most.
And I got to say, I was fortunate to have a lot of friends who came out of the woodwork
that I didn't even like, I didn't realize that they considered me close enough.
To show up for something like that, because you know, that's, that's kind of a personal
thing and, and you don't know who's going to walk through the door.
And the number of people that I didn't know that they considered me that close of a friend
to do that for me was, I mean, there were days over in tears, my eyes, I was just like,
so overwhelmed with the amount of love that was shown for someone that they barely knew.
And you know, of course my close friends were all there as well, but walking up and down
the hall and having those conversations and being able to be there for you and talk it
through and say, you know, well, you're asking other people, why not today?
Why are you questioning it?
This is the point we've got to get this done and, and getting to do that for other friends
and talk about whatever it was in their life, because I didn't want to talk about me.
I didn't want to talk about what was going on.
I needed any distraction and just getting to be there for other people while they were
helping me through that was amazing.
Yeah.
And you, you were very smart about that.
Like reaching out, ask, and I admire that you asked for help.
So many people don't ask for help.
So you've been here in seven years of which almost half of those seven years have been,
we were in lockdown for part of it.
And so you really built friendships, tribe community through social media and virtual
methods.
I found something in my life that I think a lot of people overlook is that, and it's
all started from, you know, loan a book to a friend or to somebody who isn't your friend,
because then they'll think you're friends.
Right.
And I, Thomas Jefferson, I don't know, I can't remember who's that was.
It was a founding father.
And I, I've taken that and I've grown on it and said, you know, tell somebody something
you're not sure you want them to know, because showing that little bit of vulnerability often
makes other people go, wait a minute, if they trust me with this, like we're friends, like
that's, that's my person and I can trust them with things.
And so you find that it opens this door and this connection between souls of like, we're,
we're each other's person now, you know, you know, something about me and I'm trusting
you with it.
And, and, you know, maybe it's not the biggest secret in the world, but something that I
wouldn't have told, you know, somebody at the grocery store while we're picking out
meat for this week's dinner.
So it is something personal and it is something that you might not have wanted to share or,
or didn't think that you were going to share at that moment.
And for whatever reason, I feel like I always know the right, right thing in the right time
when you're having that conversation with somebody to say, you know, this is, this is
what they need to hear from me to know that I consider them my person and I want them
to consider me the same way.
That's awesome.
And I think it's a gut thing.
It's an instinct.
It's saying, why not today?
Like, I'm not a hundred percent comfortable with saying this, but I'm just going to do
it.
And you know, I was talking to coaching a friend yesterday about something, a hard conversation
like just envision the after how good you're going to feel.
And I think that is where this podcast has evolved.
I can't believe it's been almost a year, but it's, we're talking about subjects that people
can relate to and make, make us normal and real.
And people are saying, that's me.
Like I can relate to that.
Somebody I shared this podcast with somebody the other day, and this is, I'm going to share
this coach says, why not today is such an inspiring message.
And I love how each person shares her own personal experiences of choosing that for
themselves.
It gives your listeners permission and courage to do that for themselves.
Okay.
Isn't that powerful?
Like, and that's, I think that's what we're doing.
And so what you did and what you showed and witnessed and let people, oh, you opened up
your world to them and you showed that you needed help.
And I think we're too afraid sometimes to ask for help.
And yours were simple health.
I remember one day and I was out of town so I couldn't help you, but you like, I need
Rita's frozen ice or whatever that stuff's called.
Yeah.
And I showed up at the hospital and the hospital was out of Italian ice and I was on clear
Italian ice.
I was wanting it so badly.
And I have to say that the first day that I asked three different people showed up throughout
the day.
And then the next lunch, dinner, three different people brought me Italian ice.
If I hadn't asked, I wouldn't have received, right?
Like you have to throw it out there what you need.
And my options really, when I was put in the hospital for, you know, and at the beginning
I didn't know it's going to be 15 months, but I knew I was going to be missing for just
a little while.
And my options were to let the entire world know that something is wrong and I could use
some support and here's what's going on with me or let everybody think I just disappeared,
that I flaked, that I was gone.
And I couldn't live with that.
I knew at the end of the day, I couldn't live with all of the great people and the great
connections I had met just thinking I was gone, that I was not part of their group anymore,
didn't want to be friends or wasn't going to hang out.
And then they can read their own stories about you.
Right.
I wanted to make sure that everybody knew exactly where I was and that I would be back,
that I was not far away.
And if you want to come to me in the meantime, let's do it.
If you want to talk on Zoom, let's do it.
But know that at some point this will end and I'll be right back to who I was.
Right.
And you are and I admire you for that.
So you know, you reached out for help and my mom is a helper and loves to do things
for people, but she doesn't want people to do things for her.
And I always share with her like people like to help and we want to be useful.
We don't know what that looks like sometimes.
And so you requesting what it looked like.
I remember one time you just said, call me.
I need to talk to people on board.
Like you were still in the midst of setting up networking things.
You took care of yourself.
I remember one day I got a phone call from you and like, I need some new Mary Kay colors.
I need some lipsticks and some eye colors.
I need to feel better about me.
And all those things are just so important that we forget.
So when you don't ask for help, you block the blessing of somebody else that wants to
help.
And that's how I felt about it is how would I feel if any one of these people that are
doing this for me, I knew that they, they needed something and they just didn't tell
me, you know, I would feel left out of their life.
I would feel like I wasn't a part of it.
And so I wanted people to know that they are a part of my life.
And you know, one day it was, I need conditioner.
Like I was just at a conditioner and my husband was working and one of my friends called me
immediately.
He starts texting me.
He's like, I'm at Walmart.
What kind do you use?
And it was just, it's the little things that I was able to just say, Hey, I'm going to
throw this out there and not ask somebody specifically.
Cause you know, I don't know who's busy today and I don't want anybody to feel that, that
kind of obligation to me, but I'll bet if I throw it out there, if there's somebody
that will jump up and say, Hey, I've got 20 minutes, let me go get that for you.
And I love that you used pretty much use social media to do this.
Oh yeah.
Facebook.
Social media is something it's like that I have, it's like, I don't want to be distracted
by it, but I know I need to use it and use it as a tool, which you did to meet people,
to network, to build relationships.
It's social media because you want to be social.
It's commenting, it's engaging, it's getting to know people, it's learning about their
lives and you know, we're so focused on making everything perfect.
I feel like the right people see it at the right time too.
Like, you know, if I put it on Facebook, I can be pretty sure that somebody that was
busy at work probably wasn't on their Facebook.
So they weren't feeling torn or obligated to get to me because it was somebody who was
scrolling Facebook.
Yeah.
And somebody that, you know, it was a perfect time.
Just like when I came to see you and you helped me tremendously when I was helping you and
in that how it all works that you give and you get and, and that's really what networking
is.
So, and I love that you're just open to meet everybody.
And I look at our mutual friends when we first even met.
Now I look at them like, okay, how are you connected with that person?
And you're just twisting and wrapping into my life and all the worlds.
And I mean, I've been in this world a long time in the North Virginia area and you are
just totally, that was one of the things that impressed me is you just connected.
So talk about your jacket or your t-shirt.
I love this.
I know you love my t-shirt.
I had it made up by a small company and it just says on the back, it's got a golden retriever.
I'm the golden retriever of people.
I'm excited to meet everybody.
Every time I walk into your room, it's how many people can I meet?
And so we put a golden retriever on the back and it just says, have I met you yet?
And on the front, it has my name and big letters.
So one, I don't have those sticky name tags that fall off at every event that you go to
because my name's already right there, but two, it lets people know that I'm here to
meet you.
That's literally what I showed up today for.
I might tell you about a business or I might tell you about a calendar that I'm running
or whatever, but at the end of the day, I just want to meet as many people as I can.
And I think that people have really responded to that like you did and are just like, oh
my goodness, I love that.
I've got to know who that is.
Yeah.
And you know, for me, I love collecting friends.
I love to meet new people.
I met somebody connected on Facebook the other day and we have a hundred and some mutual
friends.
I don't know how I never knew her.
We crossed a million different circles and we had coffee and we were talking about some
ideas.
I'm like, well, I'm going away this weekend.
Do you want to come to the lake?
And afterwards I'm like, okay, is that creepy?
Like I just found that connection with her and like, I want to be your friend.
And that's what I love about networking.
And it's not just networking at the grocery store, at a restaurant, you know, getting
to know people.
And I think people, you know, I came by networking very organically through my father.
I didn't really realize what he had taught me.
Many lessons on just connecting with people.
And when you're out, just getting to know people, because you never know, like, you
know, you, you work at restaurant, run restaurants, owning a restaurant, but that's not your single
focus lane.
You know, my source of income has been Mary Kay for years, but there's so many other parts
of Leslie and of Sarah and we have vast resources.
Like if somebody's looking for something, you know, 99% of the time you or I can connect
them to the person that needs to have that done.
Yes.
Well, and here's a funny story that I've not told you before is that when I was in North
Carolina, it's very, very common for you to be shopping for cereal and somebody goes,
oh, hey, I have a coupon for that.
Here you go.
Or you're looking for bacon and they're like, oh, don't use that brand.
Use this brand.
And like, you cannot leave the grocery store without three people talking to you.
You can't like it's impossible.
And so when I first moved to Northern Virginia and people don't do that here, like, you know,
it happens a little, but it's, it's not common.
And like the second time I went to the grocery store, I called my mom and I was just in tears
and she's like, what's wrong?
Like nobody speaks to me.
Like I don't know what is wrong, but you say hi to people in the grocery store.
They just don't even respond.
And I just didn't understand that that's not common everywhere.
That's not, you know, that's not the way that it is.
It isn't everywhere, but it is also the person, how focused some people are and how people
live in their little bubble.
I walk around my lake all the time and say, good morning.
Hello to people.
I met someone one day and she's like, I'm like, oh, I've met you before.
She didn't remember.
And finally she's like, oh, you're the person that always smiles and says hello.
I'm like, okay, that's a good thing to be known for, but that's kind of scary that other
people aren't known for that.
Well, that's, I used to walk to work every day.
I lived at two blocks from one of my restaurants when I first started there and I would walk
every day.
And so every day I would say, hi, good morning, whatever it's whoever's going by, you know,
maybe pet a dog here and there.
And at first they were looking at me like she's a crazy person.
I know they look at you and they look down and they don't want to acknowledge that.
But it was funny by the time I left, it wasn't the same way.
They would say hi to me first, or they would, you know, let the dog run over to me because
they knew that's what was coming.
And it was just such a change.
And you can be that change.
If you, you know, that's the kind of neighborhood I want to live in.
Me and all of my friends in my neighborhood.
Now we have a chat thread that blows up all day because we talk to each other every day.
And it's like, be that person that you want to meet because that like attracts like.
Oh, absolutely.
And I think that's one of the things that attracted me to you is just making friends
and meeting, connecting with people.
And you know, I spent a lot of time down at Smith Mount Lake and I've got tons of friends
and connections here because I meet people and I'm deliberate about it.
And I did grow up in Northern Virginia, but I think I acquired skills that can do meet
the people and connect.
And, you know, a funny, another connection story to Outer Banks is that when I was there
in college, spring break, we were, me and my friends were at the grocery store buying
beer or something for spring break and ran into these guys that they were shopping at
the grocery store.
And they asked us what taco shells weren't wouldn't crack.
And so that was 30 some years ago.
And I can't tell you how many connections I have from that conversation.
One of the original guys that was there and are still great friends.
And my life, I wouldn't be where I'm sitting right now if it wasn't for that conversation
at the grocery store at the Outer Banks 30 some years ago.
Never know where it's going.
You just never know.
And here's my other thing.
I finally, you know, I'm in my forties and I'm watching my nieces who are now teenagers,
one's preteen and one, you know, is getting ready to be 16.
And I just keep thinking, what if we instilled in our daughters that not fear of people?
Like I wasn't raised with that.
I learned that all on my own.
I learned that I'm very socially anxious to walk into a room.
So if I know half the room, I don't have to be afraid.
So what if we taught that to the next generation of like, it's okay to meet new people.
You know, we were all raised with don't talk to strangers and that's great advice up to
a certain age.
But at a certain point, even strangers are all with our friends.
Yeah.
You know, and how are they ever not going to be strangers if you never speak to anybody?
So it's just getting that, that confidence level up and showing them that, you know,
there's a time and a place that there are certain strangers, you know, you don't talk
to, don't walk up a dark alley in the middle of the night and say hello.
But you know, maybe when you're walking down the sidewalk in the middle of the day, it's
great to say hello to everybody.
Right, and make those new friends and, and you never know too, when somebody's just having
a really crappy day and they need a friend.
Oh yeah, for sure.
There's just so many things that make a difference.
You get that call and you didn't see it coming and it's a friend out of nowhere and you didn't
realize how much you needed to hear their voice until you...
Exactly.
You just never know.
So, and we need to be those friends and I think you and I both do a good job with that.
So anything else on the courage world you want to share?
Do you want to share what your next step is in your political world?
Are you ready to talk about that?
Sure.
Or platform for that?
I'm bouncing out of the two party system.
I've had enough of it's either this way or it's that way because I just don't see the
world in black and white.
And I don't understand how we've come this far and in these two institutions that just
see things and either you're on our team or you're on somebody else's team period.
So I've decided to run independent this year to show that there's another way.
And if you give me a platform from a group, I'm going to agree with half of it.
I'm going to disagree with half of it.
I'm never going to be a party line or any other line follower.
I don't belong in a box.
I dislike boxes.
No, you are not a box girl.
I am not.
So I enjoy being able to speak my mind and be the person that I am and be true to myself.
The thing we've all been kicking around this year is putting the PO in politics.
We're pissed off of being told we have to be one thing or another.
And I really want that to shine through this year is that you don't have to be in a box.
There's nothing telling you this isn't Dallas versus the commanders.
It isn't.
This is your life.
These are things that affect your family, your friends, the people that you know, your
neighbors.
And we need to take it more seriously than to just cheer for a team.
And so I am going to be district 13's team.
That is it.
Like all I care about is our you know, does my family does your family eat?
Does my neighbor's family eat?
Do my employees families eat?
That is what matters at the end of the day.
You can tell I'm a restaurant person.
It focuses a lot around table issues.
You know, what are you talking about at your table?
Because guess what?
That's probably what we're talking about at our table too.
And how can we fix it?
And another thing I think that politicians don't do enough and I know that's a dirty
word.
I don't even like being concerned that word to be honest.
But you know, if you don't take into account what everybody else is going through and hear
their two cents of how they see the solution working out, you know, you can't be an effective
leader because guess what?
I don't know everything.
Don't I mean, don't be afraid to share that.
You're willing to learn.
The all knowing Sarah White.
You're learning, willing to learn and ask those questions, which I love.
Well, I'm hearing you on.
I wish I could vote for you, but I will be supporting and cheering on whatever I can.
And I love that you talked about, you know, everybody needs to be eating in around the
table.
And I went through the leadership Fairfax program a couple of years ago and our project
was around food insecurity.
And people don't realize in Virginia, that's an issue and rest and it's an issue.
And so I'm happy to support and help you.
And the other thing too, you mentioned is being around the table.
And one of the things with Mary Kay, we always say, you know, we meet people around their
kitchen table and you get to know people.
And what a great way to get to know somebody around food and it all kind of ties in.
So we could talk forever and ever.
And I know you got to bounce to something else, but before we leave, I want you to share
what would, what would you say to someone to encourage them to say, why not today?
So I think this is a resounding theme in yours and mine's life and every conversation we've
ever had.
And it always comes back to you.
If you're thinking of that one thing that you want to do and you know, you know, you
want to make these steps and you know, you need to make these steps for yourself and
for your mental health and your sanity.
Thinking through it, like, how are you going to feel tomorrow?
If you didn't do it, how are you going to feel next month when you still didn't do it?
And do you want to be, you know, I know what it's like to be laying there on a deathbed
at this point.
Like, you know, we didn't know if I was going to survive in November.
And I know what it's like to lay there and think I should have done just one more thing.
Don't let yourself get caught up in that because how are you going to feel when you did do
it?
How are you going to feel when you did it and it was successful?
What are you going to learn if you do it and it's not successful to make it better for
the next time?
What are you going to, what lesson are you going to pick up?
And I often share that.
Like when you have something you need to do and you don't feel like it, like just do it,
you're going to feel so much better.
And when you put your head on the pillow at the end of the day, how are you going to feel
when you did it or you didn't, if you didn't do it, you're going to be thinking about it
all day long.
You did it.
You're going to feel amazing and you can check it off your list and feel better about it.
And if it's not perfect, that's okay.
It's all good.
So nobody, nobody on our deathbed thinks about all of the things that they did, that piece
of dessert that they had that they really should have.
They needed it that day.
You know, that's not the things you're thinking about.
You're thinking about the things you didn't do that you wish you had gotten to.
So let's, let's eliminate those.
Let's get rid of as many of those as we can so that when you're laying there, you can
think about nothing more than that dessert you had and you deserved it.
Exactly.
You deserve first.
I always say that.
You deserve first because ice cream does not travel well in a doggy bag.
No, not at all.
Well, you know, the other question I always, or the thing I always finished the podcast
was this connection to my dad.
And I know we talked about, you were the first person I interviewed like I've never met your
dad.
What's the connection?
But I always tried via conversations and it's still true.
Like just the way you network and meet people.
My dad was very much like there was never a stranger.
Even when he navigated the healthcare system when he was sick, he knew everything about
like the nurse would walk into the doctor.
He knew where they're from, everything about them and got to know them.
Their care, you know, his caretaker.
He wasn't like, I read this the other day too.
It wasn't focused on his health and the crappy situation he was in and not feeling well and
being stuck in a hospital.
He was like trying to help other people and being creative and trying to connect them
and doing things.
And that's what you lived through.
Absolutely.
And it's the same relationship to wherever you're at.
And we do happen to have nurses in common is that, you know, my nurses and getting to
know that they became my family for a little while.
They were who was there with me day in and day out.
And they were the first ones to say, by the way, you haven't been able to drink for years
and you're going to be able to have a drink when you're done with this.
So yeah, we're all taking you to happy hour.
Like this is happening.
So I think making that relationship.
That's fun.
And another kind of fun story of my dad talking about the hospital that pulls it all together
with being in a hospital and politics is when he was in the hospital, he had had several
strokes and he had left neglect.
So he couldn't see from one side and he was missing an eye and his arm didn't work.
So one time the nurses brought breakfast in and we know the health care system, they are
short staff and they brought breakfast and he couldn't navigate his plate.
He needed help from the nurse and he couldn't find his call button.
And so it just happened to be a political season and a politician called on a cell phone,
which he had and asked for him to support this politician.
And he goes, tell you what, I will support you if you call the nurse's station on whatever
floor of rest hospital and you send a nurse down here, which they did and they did.
And he wrote an op ed in the paper about it.
So exactly what you need.
It sounds like he didn't hesitate to either.
So you guys are very much like that.
I'm so excited to have you as my first repeat guest.
So thank you for sharing and being on here today and lots of great nuggets.
And so if you like this podcast, listen to it on Spotify, we're on iTunes, we're on Google.
We have the website now, which is why not today podcast.com share it with a friend, review
it like it.
Let me know what you think.
And if you know other people that want to be correct, Kurt have done things courageous.
I'm looking for other people to interview.
So thank you again, Sarah.
And let's put on the calendar date to go to lunch and soon because you're done with being
in the hospital.
That's right.
I'll see you soon.
Yes.
Well, thanks again.
Thank you.
Let's bounce to our next things.
Bye.
Bye bye bye.